#ZONE OF TRUTH??? OK CLINT MCELROY

[18catsreading]

Ally: my acrobatics is negative three

Brennan: oh no no no. Oh no no no. We liked to ask Brennan for cool things. [Forcing Ally to go through with their ribbon dance shenanigans]

All chanting: jump jump jump jump jump

17 -3= 14

Brennan: so you leap out the window. Now, I want Ally to look at me. And you tell me, do you feel like a 14 is a high enough roll for your character to use a dance ribbon to fly? Bearing in mind that if I say yes now I have to say yes every other time you want to do this.

Ally: yea, definitely. I think 14 it's above average, um.

Brennan: don't pay any attention to this noise [so many dice rattling]

Murph: you guys just see the most insane things. See Kristen just go like this [mimics ribbon dancing]

Ally: I'm not trying to like FLY

Brennan: sure you're just trying to descend.

Ally: I'm just trying to like, I'm trying to grapple. It's like a grappling hook

Zac: how many stories is it?

Lou: it's 10

Zac: it's 10 stories?!

Ally: It's o-- is it 10 stories? [Surprised]

Brennan: it's 10 stories

Ally: ok I'm just trying to grapple hook. [Interrupted by Lou's laughing] I'm trying to grapple hook 3 flights down so I can cut off her dad

Zac: yeah, that kind of precision.

Brennan: okay cool. So you're just going to try to nail this. You're going to try to cap this graceful fall at 10 stories

Ally: no, do you understand, like, I'm jumping with the ribbon dancer like this [drawing diagrams in the air] you know, to fly.

Brennan: sure, cool [pulling out the box of doom]

Ally: you know, I don't know if you understand. It's like to fly [vogueing a new diagram]

Brennan: okay, so yea, you're just going to try to go a quick three stories down using a ribbon dance to do that. An ability nowhere on your character sheet.

Ally: the ribbon dancer is written on my character sheet! [Pulling out character sheet]

Brennan nods encouragingly

Murph: you have four dexterity

Brennan: so, here's the thing, I'm going to allow you to avert this because I don't want anyone to say I was cruel or mean or unfair, right? So all I'm gonna ask is this: hit a 14 acrobatics check for me right now. Box of doom.

Ally: another one?!

Brennan: yea, to just, to like Indiana Jones using a ribbon as a bullwhip.

Ally: yea. See. You let Indiana Jones do it, and that's sexist. no one respects femininity in this country. [Rolls the dice in the box of doom, ally's it right on out the side]

Brennan: you Ally'd out of the box of doom, across my lap.

Ally: rolls again.

Brennan: okay, that's a natural 2.

Ally: interesting.

In chorus: so that's a negative one

Emily: I didn't - I really thought this was gonna be one of those crazy Ally moments.

Lou: I didn't want to say it --

Ally: we don't know what the first one landed on though

Siobhan: that's true. The first one is cannon

Brennan: here's your die back

Ally: thank you

Brennan: what happens is this. Kristen, you were like, I have to got to get to the first floor before Angwyn.

Ally: here we go

Brennan: I have great news. You make it to the first floor waaaay before Angwyn does, right? And the reason for that --

Ally: why is that?

Brennan: 16, 23 -- you take --

Ally: can we say the ribbon wraps around me and makes sort of a cushion

Brennan: here is what we are going to say. Kristen to get to the first floor, you take your ribbon, twirl, leap out the window, and take 36 points of damage as you --

Ally: hell yea

Siobhan: absolutely worth it

Brennan: ah! Ah! Ah! And you fucking land on your leg and roll and snap your ankle.

Ally: all right. I do have three points left.

[thrash-rocket]

My thoughts on Petal To The Metal

I'll also be including the first moon interlude in this post and will probably work the rest of the preludes in before the next part of the campaign that follows.

It's great they all decided to essentially cosplay at the moon carnival especially Magnus just dressed in Takko's clothes

Amazed by Magnus' decision to fry a unicorn horn and dick emphatically stating he has full intentions of eating both after warning not to get the two mixed up

Another attempt at drawing the secret of tacos from the dm is failed

Unfortunate that Clint is banned by Griffin from making dick jokes although that doesn't seem to stop him

And we come to one of my favorite scenes where Takko does not grasp the gachapon while Magnus and Merle fuck about with their new gear in the background

FANTASY COSTCO WHERE ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE

I'm sure I'd they still had the full set Griffin would have made the silverware much less expensive but I appreciate the bit

Now I haven't made it to the MBMBAM episode with him but I am absolutely tickled by GARFIELD THE DEALS WARLOCK

Magnus got himself a lil pet a smol little fish friend! Bless Lord Steven Q Esquire III

Good dad move by Clint trying to buy the fish from Travis after his initial disappointment

Glad to see the director finally catch on a bit to the gang and get a bit fed up with all the goofing around

Avi is a good dude just a straight up good guy

Those racing carts are gonna have something to do with later events they're gonna have to pull some fast & furious shit later aren't they because after all the mission seems straight forward but it's clear by now nothing here is straight forward

Liking the repeating joke about Clint's zune that persists through the show

The boys are so very skilled at in the art of the exact opposite of subtly

Magnus gets to work at trying to get in the bank while while Merle, and what I can't even say is the most ridiculously named character since we have Barry fucking Bluejeans, have a gruff voice off

Clint again tries to cast some shit he just does not have

The scene with Merle seducing the vines is fantastic simply because of how uncomfortable it makes every one else on the call also nice touch by Griffin adding the butt slap from the vines

Ok but who the fuck are the figures Takko sees when he's in the ethereal plane when he uses blink

I side with Travis on the cutting the tree in half argument

Clint works in classic MBMBAM are you Ira Ray bit

Loved the conversation between Trent and Merle

"I'm in the ethereal plane this is like Netflix to me."

Good bit about the secret 4th McElroy brother Clint has apparently been saving since episode 2

Oh how far Takko has come from stealing everyone's shit to not wanting to steal from the bank

Side note an animated version of this scene is the first Taz related thing I ever saw

Scuttle Buddy No!

Cute to see how protective Travis is of Steven

Rope trick seems like a pretty dope spell and transmutation seems like a pretty good school of magic overall

Clint fucks up and Griffin is done handing out retcons to joke/stupid actions

Do the eyes they saw in the moon have anything to do with the figures Takko saw using blink

Like the visual of Takko messing up while climbing Magnus pulling his pants down and leaving him there just hanging dong in the elevator shaft

Nice me undies plug mid episode they are a fantastic product

FLOOR TWENTY BLAZE IT

Classic trope of the heros playing dumb when the protagonist asks them what they're doing

Travis makes a bold move deciding to make all his moves non-lethal

The boys get absolutely wrecked by That's so Raven

That Elfis bit got me good I was not expecting such a good Elvis impression form whoever did that

And as we reach the end of the third chapter we enter the area where I started these posts and go in blind from here on out minus small bits and pieces

Loving this in character space jam and mighty duck talk

Glad more than Justin are finally leaning into their character voices

Omg Hurley and Sloane are dating aren't they

Kind of expected Hurley to be part of the bureau

ZONE OF TRUTH

Good work leaving your grocery list/see you later note to bane

Starting to think this is gonna end up more mad max than fast & furious

"we're out of the zone of truth right... Everything is gonna be fine."

Merel's approach to converting the hammerheads is vaguely threatening

Magnus' approach is very forward

That chain LinkedIn joke is getting some good mileage

Good cliffhanger with a somewhat odd lead up what with the guard taking takko disguised as lil Jerry to the toilet and such

Justin gives up trying to bullshit his way into guessing the guard's name and pulls off a hilarious suprise attack

And the very quickly prove my theory they are incapable of not killing

I need to see the dress up montage from them getting the hammerhead jackets

Magnus' vehicle proficiency finally comes into play again

HUG BEAR NO!!! What have they done to my boy!

Fuck em up Travis get em for what they did to our boy

Justin remembers they're not supposed to kill again

Griffin almost let's them play it off

Poor Klarg at least he has a fantasy motorcycle now

Griffin is trying real hard to make sure we know these are not cars

Good monologue by Takko about not always being a joke

I am loving everything about this death race battle royal

Merle straight up clobbers his own face to get rid of the octopus on it

What the fuck I was not expecting that ass pull of a move bt takko to save Merle

Nearly died at Garyl's voice and all his lines

Uh oh takko is not all good

YES MY BOY SAVES THE DAY HUG BEAR is 1200% best bear

Bet you can't figure who my favorite side character is

Oh looks like we get some awesome background music now can't wait to hear more as the show goes on

Oh boy I can't wait to see what that button does

Oh man I completely forgot about the wand of switcharoo

Things aren't looking good for Sloane

And with one line takko subverts his monologue from earlier

Shit is getting real quick like we took a hard left turn from goofy racing fun battle

Okay Clint enough with the zone of truth

The Umbra staff is getting really OP now

Oh no Hurley what are you doing oh no oh no

And I'm crying and tearing up again writing this

And we're back to goofs I'm OK

Oh fuck goofs are canceled they done killed Captain Captain Bane

I got chills when the Red Robe spoke

I assume the Red Robe has some sort of charm or such on Bane.

[lillianvalnala]

new taz thoughts

spoilers ahoy

dad got things to do u go dad

theres tackling, but you gotta be cool about it

griffin what were you thinking jfc

coach boy maggie!!

ok maggie speech is kinda eh 

TWINS FUCK YEAH

god i love these twins

taako eats and aaaaaaaaaaaa cooking

Dark DM give him the Hidden Resturant

travis makes good jokes that need more attention 

mm-mmm-mmm

B A S E M E N T  R E S T U R A N T 

griffin ur making me hungry please stop this

a pulling??????? pardon????????

aww this is... this is painful 

this makes me emo jfc

dad time dad time dad time

clint doesnt have dice jfc

also “dad’s making a jerk-off motion at me”

i say this all the time but griffin is such a good story teller

ditto is my fave nickname

lup wants her 15 fucking dollars

DONT HUMANIZE THE VORE THING P LE A S E

G R I F F I N YOU WILL BE DEAD TO ME 

GRIFFIN MCELROY I SWEAR TO GOD

taako is two rooms away

“try not to insult it”

yes go glassy and fall on his face this is me, everyday

i dont like him already please for the love of gods

i dont want the vore cloud to be human

i want to punch the hunger he sounds like a douche bag

g o d fuck off Vore Boy

bye merle you got killed by Vore Man

until he’s given a name other than the hunger, im calling him Vore Boy

OH GODS HIS NAME IS JOHN CAN HE BE ANY MORE B O R I N G

fuck you griffin his name is Vore Boy

“im in an uncomfortable position” me too

IT CAN BE THEIR ZONE OF TRUTH

Just a couple of guys bein pals

asdfghjkl justin comparing merle to a pinata is my mood

god i cant get over the name john its just to basic

i want john to Fuck Off

john can eat an entire ass

oh no oh no oh no

OH NO OH NO OH NO

HEY DM NO THANKS

jesus hell

john takes a fuckin sip, babe

what are you doing thats a good question

i ask what is joy every day

life sucks john

oh fuck no what please dont

“huh, i feel sad” wow me every fucking day

the noises were the taz fandom

B A R D  I S L A N D 

“I’m sorry I asked”

g o d i want to live here jfc

this makes me so emo i love this

now i need the next episode jfc pl e as e

[justmonicca]

someone: you're not hurting me or anything it's ok me, bass boosted at 10 decibels, in the voice of clint mcelroy: I CAST ZONE OF TRUTH-