#abbey is happy to have open relationship. why waste time on relationship drama when you can communicate with your partner and agree to kiss

[xxcherrycherixx]

cupid's gals meet

[detectivejay-chuckles-halstead]

Thanks // Jay Halstead x Reader // Pt 8

Description: Jay and Y/N continue to find their footing in this new relationship while beginning to navigate helping Mouse.

Warnings: None

Pairing: Jay x Reader, Reader x Mouse!Platonic, Jay x Mouse!Platonic

Words: 2271

A/N: This part has been a pain in my butt, and I still feel like it isn’t flowing right. But, I’ve done all I can do to try and fix it. Hopefully the next part will be a bit better. 

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

“How does dinner tonight sound?” Jay asked you over the phone as you walked through the halls of Chicago Med, heading down to the ED for a psych consult. He’d called you on the rare lunch break he had. 

Things had been going great since the two of you had kissed that night. In fact, it was better than great. Nearly every night during the next week, the two of you were at one of the apartments. Not to mention, going and seeing Mouse, though you hadn’t told him yet of the new relationship development. 

“Sounds like you should pick me up at seven,” you agreed. “Anything in particular I should wear?” 

“Something border-line fancy.” That peaked your interest, but you weren’t going to be able to get further clarification as the elevator opened up on the first floor.

“Got it. I’m in the ED for a consult. I’ll text you when I can, but I will definitely see you at seven sharp,” you told him, the two of you saying quick goodbyes before hanging up the phone. You couldn’t help but strut into the ED with a smile on your face and an air of increased confidence about you.

“Y/N,” Maggie called out, quickly making your way over to her. “What’s got you in such a good mood today?” Talking to Maggie was like talking to an older sister, she always knew the right things to say. Plus, she always knew when something was up. And something was definitely up with you.

“I have a hot date tonight,” you answered with a giggle, not telling her who it was. But with the raise of her eyebrow and the smirk on her face, you were sure she already knew. 

“Would he happen to be the better looking Halstead brother?”

“I heard that!” Will called out from his computer, though he didn’t look offended, flashing you a smile. Seemed like he might know about the new arrangement as well.

“I’m not one to kiss and tell, Maggie. Where am I going?” 

The rest of the day flew by, Daniel giving you the contact information for his social worker friend. You’d bring that up to Jay later, knowing he was going to do what he could for Mouse. In fact, he was excited, sending you links to facilities in Chicago that he wanted to look at.

When you got home, you went ahead and hopped in the shower, not wasting any time in getting ready for your date tonight. A date with Jay Halstead. It was something else, that was for sure. When you first met him, you would have never guessed that this would be where you’d end up. Not in a million years, yet…

The black dress hugged you just right, letting your y/h/c hair down for once, a slight curl to it. A natural make-up look to piece it all together, and a pair of heels. You were ready to go, finishing up just a few minutes before a familiar knock on the door. When you opened it, Jay stood there with a smile. 

“You look...wow,” he complimented with a smile, bringing you in for a kiss. When you pulled away, you let your hands rest on his chest. 

“You look pretty spiffy yourself,” you retired before another quick kiss. “You ready to go?” 

He led you down to his truck, opening the door for you and helping you in. As he drove through the still busy Chicago streets, one hand held onto yours, occasionally glancing over at you with a smile. The radio played low in the background as you told him about the day you’d had at work, leaving the information Daniel had given you out for the time being. 

He pulled up in front of an Italian restaurant you’d only ever passed, never thinking you’d go. It always seemed too expensive. Once the car was in park, he met you on the other side, helping you out as well. 

“This is too much, Jay,” you told him as he took your hand, walking inside. 

“You deserve this. Plus, I want our first date to be memorable,” he corrected, the waiter leading you to a table. First date...it had a nice ring to it as the two of you sat down, beginning to peruse over the menu. 

The dinner went amazing, enjoying both your food and your company. Jay talked a bit about his childhood, why he’d joined the military, what he’d been up to since he got back. Finally, substantial conversation and not just something to fill the silence. The night continued after dinner, moving a cocktail lounge less than a block away for a couple of drinks. This time, you were the one to talk about your tumultuous childhood, moving from army base to army base before leaving for college. You’d each had a couple of mixed drinks, not enough to be drunk, but enough to feel it.

“You good driving or should we get an Uber?” you asked him when the two of you walked out of the bar. 

“Yeah, I’ll be good. I’m not that drunk,” he assured you, walking back to the valet to get the car. His arm was around your shoulders, yours around his waist. “Plus, your place isn’t that far luckily.”

“True. Thank god for a doc’s salary, right?” You could feel the vibration in his chest when he laughed.

The ride back home wasn’t quiet either. Now, he was telling you funny stories and the drama from work over the years in Intelligence. You’d only heard about the team, not actually having met anybody yet. Though, you were pretty sure you’d meet them soon if you were seeing Jay. He parked the truck out front, not turning it off.

“You should come upstairs,” you suggested, really not wanting the night to end. The glimmer in his eye and the smile on his face said he wanted the same thing, but the words out of his mouth were a different story. 

“I shouldn’t,” he corrected, smile fading just a bit, so you reached out to grasp his hand as you tried to understand his hesitations. 

“What’s going through your head?” That got an eyebrow raise from him. “As your...more than friends epic experience.” 

“If I go upstairs, then things change,” he answered. 

“Jay, things are changing already. They have changed. So much over the past few months, and even more in the past week. There’s nothing I want more than to be with you. But if you’re having second thoughts…” You hoped he wasn’t, considering he’d just dished out quite a bit of money on dinner and drinks. 

“No! No. No second thoughts here. We haven’t had the ex talk, and I have a lot more baggage than I let on.” 

“Then come upstairs, and we can talk. Nothing else, just...talk,” you shrugged, hoping he would agree. It took a minute to get a nod in agreement, both of you getting out of the truck and going upstairs. “Now, as much as I love this outfit, I’m going to go change. Make yourself at home.”

You changed into a tank-top and shorts, pulling your hair up into a messy bun before rejoining him in the living room. He’d ditched his suit jacket, the fabric laying on one of the dining room chairs. His shoes were next to the door, sleeves rolled up and the top few buttons undone on his shirt. You couldn’t help but smile before sitting down next to him. It felt so natural as his arm came around you, letting you lean into him. 

“It was tough for me when I got back state-side. I’ve told you that before. But it doesn’t feel like it got easier at times. The first person I was with after I got back, her name was Abbey. We knew each other when I served, and we met again in Vegas at a funeral for one of the guys,” he explained. “We hooked up a couple of times, a coping mechanism. And then we got married. I didn’t remember half of it. We got divorced a few years later. It was supposed to be sooner, but apparently she never signed the papers. Then there was Erin. I mean, I really wasn’t into the hookup culture when I got back. We were together for almost three years. I thought I was going to marry her, but things didn’t end up that way.”

“Why are you telling me this now?” you asked him, since it seemed like he was done. 

“Since I’ve been back, I haven’t been with a lot of people. I just...It’s stupid,” he brushed off, shaking his head. 

“No, it’s not, Jay. Whatever it is, it’s something that’s on your mind.” You wanted to hear it, wanted to know how his mind worked, what made him happy and sad and mad, what made him get out of the bed in the mornings. 

“It’s because of the leg,” he finally said with a sigh, which made you understand a little better. “Just, being in that situation with somebody is stressful almost. And it shouldn’t be. You know, after thirteen years I should be over it. With Erin, she got used to it, but the first few times were awkward. And with Abbey, we were too drunk most of the time for me to even care.”

“I won’t think any different of you Jay. I’ve already seen it, so on my end, you’re still the same Jay I’ve always known with no surprises thrown in. There’s no rush, though. I want to know you, every part of you, inside and out.” You let your head rest on his chest, 

“You really know how to make a guy swoon, babe.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, your eyes closing with a content sigh. “Maybe I could stay the night though? Get used to everything?”

“I’d like that. You work tomorrow?” you asked him, getting a head shake and a smile from you. “Neither do I, which makes tonight an even better night for you to stay. I might have an old pair of shorts that would fit you.”

“I have a bag in my car for those long nights at work. I’ll be right back,” he promised, getting up to go downstairs.

Again, you didn’t personally understand his worries and insecurities, but you understood the concept behind them. Intimacy after amputation was a difficult thing at times. You weren’t going to push it, though, deciding to just let things take their course. Just like promised, he was right back, disappearing into the bathroom to change. When he reemerged, he set the rest of his suit with his jacket, dressed in a grey t-shirt and a pair of shorts. It was the first time you’d seen his prosthetic. 

“Want to head to bed, or sit out here for a bit?” you asked as he stood behind the couch, hands resting on the fabric on either side of your head. He smiled down at you.

“Bed sounds like a plan,” he answered, getting you to stand up and lead him back into your room. When you looked at him, you just saw Jay. 

You sat down on the left side of the bed -- your side -- while Jay sat on the right. You went ahead and got yourself situated as Jay just sat there, watching him take deep breaths. So, you got up on your knees behind him, arms wrapping around his stomach and pressing a kiss to his shoulder not saying anything. He relaxed back into you before leaning down to slide his prosthetic off as well as the sleeve. As he did so, you let your fingers run along his back, watching the process. 

“You’re not freaked out by this?” he asked you as the two of you finally laid down. 

“Not one bit. The benefit of med school.” It took a minute to find a good situation where you both were comfortable, your head on his chest. At first, it was odd to only feel one full leg with yours, but didn’t take long to get used to. “Alexa. House lights off,” you called out, the lights dimming before turning completely off.

“Okay, I need to get me one of those. No more having to get up to turn the lights off,” Jay told you, his fingertips tracing invisible patterns on your back. “Would make life just a bit easier.” 

“You want to carpool tomorrow?” you asked him, pulling the blanket up over the two of you. 

“Sure. Save some gas money,” he agreed. “Maybe we can tell Mouse about this -- us,” he quickly corrected. It seemed like you were both on the same page of wanting it to be more, which was a benefit. Though, you knew you still had to work towards it. “Any progress on applying to be Mouse’s guardian?”

“Yeah. Daniel gave me the information for the social worker. She could probably answer your questions better than I can. Have you found a lawyer yet?” you countered, sighing as he continued to draw patterns. 

“I’ve been looking into it. Voight is giving me a couple suggestions, some people that owe him favors I guess. I won’t be the one to ask why they owe favors, though, that’s for sure. Some secrets are better left secrets.” You wondered what he meant by that, but didn’t ask, not sure how. Plus, you weren’t going to be awake long enough to ask, eyes drifting shut before falling into a restful sleep.

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[machihunnicutt]

What the Downton Movie Owes Me (but will probably not give me): Some Thoughts on Thomas Barrow

yes...I wrote 1k+ words on this. I’m so sorry.

I’m watching Downton Abbey for the 3rd (4th?) time with my sister who hasn’t seen it. I love this glorified soap opera to death, y’all, with the full acknowledgment that this show does a horrible job with a lot of its plot lines designed to tackle complicated issues: disability (the ableism against Bates via the house that he never gets apologies for, Matthew and his spinal injury/wheelchair that is always framed as life-ending and making him nothing but a “burden”), class (the Branson/Sybil marriage is alright, but there are countless missed opportunities to interrogate the relationship between upstairs and downstairs, particularly Carson’s attachment to a family that monopolizes his life and the lives of all its employees), (I’m going to leave race and gender alone because I think it does a pretty decent job when these issues come into play but feel free to lmk if there’s something I missed!), and sexuality, which is what I want to get into.

So granted, I understand that I’m not the target audience for this show. I understand that Downton’s gay characters were not written primarily to be relatable, multifaceted representations of gay people in a period drama. I get that Downton’s target audience is older, straight people for which representation isn’t super important. But, I have watched this show at least 3 times now and I’m still angry about its treatment of Thomas Barrow, so I’m going to break down why:

1) Things We Know About Thomas Barrow

I really like early seasons of Downton because, for all its drawn out drama and plot twists, it cares a lot about character development and consistency. Many characters (dare I say the majority) do mean and bad things and yet, we are still empathetic because we’ve spent time with them, understand why they make the choices they do, and see them learn from their mistakes (early seasons Mary is an excellent example.)

Thomas Barrow is my favorite Downton character because of the great narrative work they do in this regard. In the first episode we learn several character traits of his that continue to be important throughout his arcs:

- He doesn’t trust easily and has few friends in the house. (AKA, boy’s got a bad attitude. It’s better to act like you hate everyone than give them the chance to reject you.) I found this immediately endearing (because of who I am I guess lol), and though I understand why people don’t like his character because of this, I think it’s a good move for a character you intend to have grow over a long period of time. Opening up, accepting help from others, and showing kindness are all parts of Thomas’ future storylines, actions that show his slow growth from this facet of his character. I also think it’s important to note that when Thomas does make friends he is loyal to them (I’m excepting O’Brien from this category given there’s so much backstabbing between them that it’s a stretch to call them friends) and will take risks to protect them (Examples: befriending Lt. Courtenay and later fighting Dr. Clarkson to keep him at the hospital; befriending Lady Sybil and speaking kindly about her when he doesn’t have nice things to say about anyone else upstairs, later earnestly mourning her death in a show of vulnerability he generally masks; befriending Jimmy and looking out for him when he gets drunk at the fair, going as far to get beaten up to save Jimmy; befriending Andy and helping him learn to read; befriending the kids of the house and saving them from that one nasty nanny who was mistreating them.)

- He’s a romantic. The man wants to be loved and jfc I wish the show gave him a good love interest.

- He’s easily manipulated. (More on this later, but for now...) The Duke plays him, and it’s cruel, but it shows how easily Thomas can be tricked when he’s offered affection and the chance to leave Downton for something better. (Also note: from day one, he’s wanted to leave Downton!)

- He’s the evil gay trope. The gay villain trope has a long and complicated history and sure, you can say Thomas’s sexuality and role as an antagonist aren’t connected, but the show doesn’t exist in a vacuum and it feeds into a long history of villainizing LGBT and LGBT coded characters. The thing I hate most is that they get really close to subverting it in Thomas’ best moments (his work in the hospital during the war, his relationship with the kids, his gradual opening up to people in the house) but alas...

2) Why I Hate The Jimmy Kent Arc More Than Anything

Okay, so it makes sense for Thomas to be manipulated by O’Brien. That’s consistent with his character and I don’t fault the show for melodrama because that’s what it does. What I hate, is that the show depicts Thomas’ attraction to Jimmy as predatory and when he is punished for trying to kiss Jimmy while he’s asleep (which is assault) the house (and I’d argue, the show) frames this as bad only because Thomas is gay and Jimmy is not. In the show’s narrative Jimmy is mad because he’s homophobic, not because he’s been violated. And his and Jimmy’s ensuing friendship would be genuinely sweet if it really was just an issue of homophobia and not one of ASSAULT!

I’d argue, you can’t have it both ways. You can’t portray Thomas as predatory and then brush it aside to make a statement about tolerance, because assaulting people is bad regardless of the sexuality of the perpetrator. You either need to punish his actions for what they are or get better at story telling and not rely on the predatory gay stereotype.

But, secondarily, I’m bothered by this arc because it doesn’t seem in character, to me. I know Thomas does a lot of bad, stupid things, but I don’t think it makes sense for him to be predatory. In his best moments he is protective, romantic, and loyal. Yes, we see him as rash and naive, but his actions never felt right for the character, to me. I just think it’s lazy writing to handle his attraction to Jimmy this way, especially given the development of their friendship afterward. It would’ve been so much more satisfying and narratively interesting for Thomas to express his feelings for Jimmy in a respectful way. Jimmy is the only character we see Thomas have genuine feelings for (not motivated by upward mobility as in the case of the Duke or I guess(?) racial stereotyping in the case of Kemal Pamuk...but lbr his pass at him was mostly a plot device) and I think the arc would’ve been so much more fulfilling if we saw it as Thomas’ attempt to love someone fully and honestly, even if it ultimately doesn’t work out the way he wants it to. And I don’t get why they didn’t do this! Because the Jimmy/Thomas friendship ends up being sweet, and useful for each character’s development. They just had to make it gross by beginning with an assault. Just a huge, lazy, waste of a potentially good idea.

3) The Last Season Was Bad For A Lot Of Characters But They Did Thomas Extremely Dirty

I don’t know where to start with the last season because I think they ran into so many problems because they forgot how to use great characters effectively (Mary is a prime example!!) and started just throwing them into dramatic situations for the sake of plot and not keeping actions consistent with established character.

For example, life at Downton is the roughest it has ever been for Thomas in season 6, to the point where he is alienated by most in the house (I’m not going to talk about how badly Carson treats him and how much of a tyrant Carson is in the last season because again, I think it comes down to the writers forgetting how to use their characters effectively) and attempts suicide. All in all, I just don’t like this because it’s predictable and overdone. Gay people in period pieces almost always have overwhelmingly tragic stories and it’s not fun for me to watch anymore. What most disappoints me though, is that when everyone else is getting paired off in the fan-servicey ending, Thomas’ consolation prize is being the butler??? To a house full of people who’ve hated him??? He’s wanted from the beginning to leave Downton and in the end he doesn’t.

Don’t get me wrong, if the show had shown me his change in attitude and relationship to the house, given me this character development in meaningful ways, and not used a suicide attempt as a half-assed catalyst for change, I would be all for Thomas as Downton’s butler. I think that if they’d done the work of making it a believable and constructive next step for his character, that I’d really like it. I think Thomas’ relationship with the kids (particularly George! I’d watch a whole movie about that!) is well done and I think it echos Carson’s relationship with Mary, but better. But you! have! to! do! the! work! to! get! the! audience! there! You can’t give me a whole season of Downton nastiness and Thomas suffering and then expect me to buy that this is his happy ending.

4) What I Want From This Movie

I don’t think I’ll get it (though a love interest for Thomas via the trailer is encouraging), but here’s what I want:

- Show me why Thomas Barrow as Downton butler makes sense. And if you can’t, let him leave and be happy somewhere else because he deserves it.

- Show me how he’s grown. Show me his relationship with the kids and how he’s better than Carson because I need it!!

- Let Thomas be in a relationship that is healthy and not manipulative or coercive or a plot device for drama.

- Let him be in love and don’t make it a sad story. Please.

I find Thomas Barrow such a compelling character because he isn’t perfect. He makes mistakes. He does bad things. He grows. He changes over the course of six seasons. He’s a gay character in a period drama whose story isn’t about being ashamed of who he is. It isn’t about denial or apologies or pretending he’s someone he isn’t. And I think that’s significant. I just wish they’d done a slightly better job. :)

(Thanks for reading. I’m gonna keep being a Thomas Barrow stan even when no one watching with me thinks I’m valid lol.)