#also I’m in the process of packing and getting ready to suddenly and spontaneously move

[hockeylvr59]

Secret Love Part 11 || Cale Makar

Requested: [ ] yes [x] no

Authors Note: So I really struggled writing Chapter 10...Chapter 11 however...took me like two days. So yeah...uh characters are still in Iceland, Days 3 and 4 sightseeing will be posted following this. As always all posts for this series can be found by searching the tag ‘038’ on my blog. Let me know what you think. 

Gif Credit: @j-compher​

Warnings: cursing, oral sex, smut, unprotected (on birth control but no condom) smut

Word Count: 3,819

~~~~~~

If you’d thought day two of your trip had involved a lot of driving, you were in for a rude awakening moving forward.

The morning of your third day in Iceland, you and Cale had slept in until around 8 am before getting up, heading down to breakfast, packing up and then checking out of the hotel. Before leaving Reykjavik, you stopped at a market to stock up on some drinks and snacks, then a gas station for a refill before finally hitting the road heading south.

After about an hour and 40 minute drive, you reached your first stop: Seljalandsfoss Waterfall. This waterfall was the perfect photo op because you could actually walk behind the falls. Taking some sillier but also sweet pictures, you continued on to another waterfall about a half hour away. From there, you stopped for lunch before Cale drove on to Dyrhólaey Nature Reserve.

The nature reserve was home to sea stacks and arches and the view from the upper trail was breathtaking. It had only been three days but already you were certain that Iceland was one of the most beautiful countries in the world.  After taking in the views from above, you headed to the lower trail and onto Reynisfjara beach.

There, black sand stretched in front of you as far as you could see. It was so different than any other beach you’d ever been on but it was honestly really, really cool. As cool as the sand was, the rock formations lining the beach were even cooler. After walking tucked into Cale’s side for a little bit you looked up at the cliffs to your left and immediately started freaking out. Jumping up and down, trying not to squeal, you tugged on Cale’s sleeve as if your previous actions hadn’t already gained his attention.

“What are you freaking out about?” Cale asked, mystified expression on his face.

“Puffins!” You squealed quietly, pure glee on your face. “They’re so cute!” The last thing you wanted to do was disturb the birds, but you were so excited to see them it was impossible to keep completely silent. Of course, you kept your distance, simply admiring them from afar.

Cale didn’t seem to know what to do with your reaction but he let you have your moment watching the birds, his lips pressed against the top of your head. As you headed back down the beach Cale rubbed his thumb against your side.

“I take you to see beautiful geological formations but it’s the birds you’re excited about.” He mused, shaking his head.

“Leave me alone.” You pouted. “You don’t just see puffins anywhere you know.” Lifting your chin, Cale kissed you softly.

“As long as you’re having fun and are excited about something I’m happy.” He insisted, his arm pulling you closer into his side.

It wasn’t a far drive to the village of Vik which Cale informed you was where you were staying for the night. Unlike yesterday where you had been going non-stop, not returning to your hotel until after 11pm, today you were already here and it was only late afternoon.

After checking into your hotel, you dropped off your bags and used the bathroom before heading into the village itself to park and walk around. Stopping into the tourist shop, you browsed around looking specifically at all of the locally made products. Eventually, you spotted a set of glass coasters made from the black sand of the beaches you’d just been on. Across the tops, various local scenes were painted. They were simple but beautiful and your fingers lingered across the tops of them.

“Those are nice.” Cale said, appearing over your shoulder suddenly.

“Yeah they are.” You agreed. Picking up two sets, Cale handed you one.

“We should get them. One for the house, one for my apartment.” Cale declared. “That way we both have something to remind us of this trip.”

“That’s really soft Cale.” You murmured.

“Don’t care.” He replied. Though you continued to look around, there wasn’t anything else that spoke to you as much as the set of coasters did and eventually you headed to the register to purchase them.

Walking around the village you took in how cute and quaint it was. Soon after your stomachs started complaining, you stumbled into a small restaurant. There you and Cale split a pizza with pesto for sauce, mozzarella cheese, tomatoes, parma ham, topped with a balsamic glaze and parmesan cheese. It was delicious and you left feeling completely stuffed.

You’d called it an early night back at the hotel, settling for a movie on Netflix as you curled up together in bed. A relaxing evening was exactly what you needed to recharge and be ready to continue on your journey.

++

Day four of your trip started by filling up the gas tank and then embarking on an hour long drive to Fjaðrárgljúfur canyon.

Just before you reached the canyon, you encountered a small turn off which led you to a viewpoint. Climbing out of the car you walked up the pathway until you reached a platform. As far as the eye could see were moss covered rocks and it truly felt like you had stepped onto another planet.

“Are you sure we’re still on planet earth?” You whispered to Cale. Your boyfriend chuckled quietly in response, his hand resting on your hip. It seemed like the more time you spent alone together, not worried about who you saw or who saw you, the more reliant on physical touches each of you became. You’d never felt so comfortable just being with someone and thinking back on the times you’d seen Cale with Sara, you had a feeling the same could be said for him.

With more pictures clogging up your phones, you continued on to the Canyon itself. It was only a two-minute walk to the start of the canyon from the car and the moment you reached it your jaw dropped.

“Cale…” You whispered. You didn’t even have words to describe how beautiful this place was.

“Woah...sweetheart.” Cale’s thumbs brushed against your cheeks as he spoke and it wasn’t until he pulled you into his chest that you realized you were crying. “Shhh..give your brain a minute to process.” Cale assured you. His patience with you seemed neverending as his hands stroked your back until you finally calmed down.

“Sorry…” You mumbled, wiping frantically at your eyes when you finally pulled away.

“Nothing to be sorry about.” Cale insisted. “You’re allowed to be emotionally effected by things. It’s normal. Especially when it’s something as amazing as this.” Cale’s lips pressed gently to your forehead and he dropped his hand from your back to lace your fingers together. “You good to go walk?” He questioned.

It took about 45 minutes to walk all the way up to the top of the canyon and back and you stopped for pictures at various points along the way. You still couldn’t put into words the way this place made you feel; it was all so overwhelming in the best way. As you stood off to the side of the first viewpoint, away from the majority of other tourists, you tugged Cale’s hand until he was close enough you could wrap your arms around his neck.

“Thank you.” You murmured, kissing him lightly. “You always know exactly what I need, you’re always putting me first and taking care of me. It doesn’t go unnoticed, and you don’t know how much I appreciate it. You mean the world to me Cale...I don’t know if I’m quite as good at showing it as you are, but I hope you know that.”

“I do...know that…” Cale responded, kissing you again gently before pulling away, a fondness in his eyes that nearly sent you reeling. Dragging your fingers along his lower back you made up your mind to show him just how important he was to you once you were actually alone.

Back in the car, you munched on some of the snacks you’d brought in lieu of trying to find somewhere to stop for lunch. It took almost two hours to get to your next stop, the Jökulsárlón Iceberg Lagoon.

There, the two of you hopped on a boat tour where you got to taste a piece of 1,000 year old ice as you toured the lagoon. It was incredible to see first hand just how much ice was breaking off of the glacier and it made you more cognizant of the consequences of global climate change.

Right across the highway from the lagoon was Breiðamerkursandur or the diamond beach where fragments of ice wash up after floating from the lagoon out into the ocean. You made Cale climb onto an iceberg so you could take a picture of him and you got some great shots of all of the ice scattered along the shore. Despite the fact that it wasn’t all that cold outside, having been surrounded by ice for the past hour or two left you feeling chilly even if you had dressed in layers.

As you climbed in the car, Cale turned the heat on and you squeezed his knee in thanks. It was just a short drive to your hotel for the night and once you’d checked in, you shed a few layers before heading to the bar for a drink before dinner.

You’d retreated to your room around 6:30pm and Cale hopped in the shower first to clean up. While you waited for him to finish, you dug in your bag trying to decide what to grab for after your own shower. Thinking back to how you had promised yourself you were going to show Cale just how important he was, you unzipped a small compartment where you’d hidden the lingerie you’d bought.

Buying lingerie had been a spur of the moment decision possibly fueled by a few glasses of wine, and the thought of actually wearing it made you nervous. Your sex life with Cale had been fairly tame so far, nothing too out of the box. It had also been completely spontaneous on every occasion. You honestly had no idea how he would react to lingerie and though both sets were fairly tame in comparison to some sets you’d seen online, this was still something new and therefore nerve wracking.

Hearing the shower turn off, you jumped, your heart racing as you grabbed the more modest of the two sets. If you were going to do this, you were going to ease into it. Collecting your cosmetic bag, you hid the lingerie close to your chest.

Slipping into the bathroom as soon as Cale exited, you stripped out of your clothes and stepped into the shower trying not to overthink this. Focusing on shaving your legs and cleaning up served as a bit of a distraction but as you toweled off, your eyes landed back on the lingerie you’d placed on the counter.

You were certain you’d talk yourself out of this if you had to stare at yourself wearing the lingerie in the mirror for too long, so you started with your makeup, doing just a little bit more than you had been lately in order to make yourself feel confident and sexy. Blow drying your hair, you brushed it out before finally reaching for the lace and silk fabric.

Burgundy colored silk sat low on your hips, edged by black lace along both of your thighs. The same black lace covered your chest, ending at the bottom of your ribcage leaving your stomach exposed. It was...sensual but not over the top and when you slid the burgundy silk robe over it, you felt like you might actually be able to pull this off.

Reminding yourself that Cale had nearly lost his shit at the sight of you in a bikini the other night, you took a deep breath before opening the bathroom door and stepping out into the bedroom. Cale was sprawled out on the bed with just a pair of shorts slung low on his hips.

“What do you want to watch tonight?” Cale’s question was asked before he ever looked up at you, but when he did he blinked slowly. “That’s uh...that’s not your usual pajama set…” He murmured.

Blood pounding through your veins, you moved across the room to climb onto the bed beside him. Grabbing the remote from his hand, you turned the tv off before setting the remote aside.

“I was thinking about a different form of entertainment tonight…” You stated, your own voice sounding foreign in your ears. Sliding over Cale’s lap until you were straddling him, your hands ran down along his arms as his eyes did a slow once over of your body. “I think it’s time I take care of you for once.” You husked, raising an eyebrow. Cale hadn’t even seen what was under the robe yet and already he was slack jawed. The power you held over him in that moment sent a rush of adrenaline through you and you slid down the bed, tugging his shorts and boxers down with you.

“You good handsome?” You teased, lightly stroking your fingers over the length of his rapidly hardening dick. Cale couldn’t seem to speak, but he nodded his head and for now that was enough consent. Flicking your tongue along the slit of his cock, you stroked the length of him in your hand until a soft grunt fell from his lips. Only then did you hollow your cheeks, sinking down around him, taking as much of his length as you could down your throat. Bobbing slowly, you felt him twitch and when you pulled back to breathe you ran your tongue along the veins on the underside of his cock.

Following your instincts, plus Cale’s body language and verbal clues, you settled into a rhythm blowing your boyfriend for the first time. You’d seen and felt Cale orgasm enough to know when he was getting close as his body strained beneath you.

“Fuck. Babe. Stop.” Cale gasped, but peeking up at him you knew he didn’t actually want you to stop.

“We’ve got all night handsome...plenty of time for you to recover after coming down my throat.” You murmured before flicking your tongue through his slit again collecting all of his precum. Returning to your efforts, you cupped his balls as you sunk down his length. After just a minute, Cale came with a moan as he spilled down your throat and after swallowing you pulled off of him, sliding your tongue along his skin to clean him up. Cale’s cheeks were flushed as he tried to catch his breath and you slid up his body, settling yourself back over his lap.

“Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?” Cale gasped, his head falling forward to land against your shoulder. Kissing his head, you ran your fingers through his hair waiting for him to become more coherent.

“Just trying to take care of my man.” You hummed. “But if you’re complaining...you don’t have to see what’s under the robe.” As you spoke, you drew his hands up to the tie at your waist, leaving it for him to undo.

The speed at which Cale undid the bow told you that he wasn’t complaining at all and you let him push the robe from your shoulders, his eyes landing on you once more. His cheeks flushed further to match the color of your shorts and his eyes were wider than you’d ever seen them. You let him stare, watching as his tongue ran over his lips leaving them wet and shiny in the dim lighting of the hotel room.

“Fuck…” Cale breathed harshly, drawing out the word. “I must be dreaming right now.” He added. “You’re a fucking dream sweetheart.” Cale’s eyes ran slowly up and down your body like he wanted to memorize every inch. “You bought this for me?”

“I take it you like it?” You assumed, letting out a soft sigh in relief at his reaction.

“What do you think?” Cale grunted, pulling your hips to roll down against his cock which was already hard again.

Laughter bubbled from your chest in reaction and you cupped his cheek as you leaned in to kiss him deeply.

“Good to know lingerie is a hit with you.” You admitted. Cale’s eyes flashed with concern for just a moment before his hand fell to your hips, his thumbs brushing against your bare stomach.

“I don’t know whether I want you to keep this on or take it off.” He declared. Clearly he knew better than he thought he did, because as he spoke his hands slid up your sides, gently gripping the fabric and drawing it up and over your head. Half nude on top of him, Cale’s hands cupped your breasts as he pulled you into a desperate kiss.

“Can’t believe you’re mine…” He mumbled, pulling back. There was something about seeing him like this, flushed red, swollen lips, blissed out from one orgasm already that lit every primal need inside of you. As much as you were his, he was yours and god did you need him inside you.

“Please Cale…” You whimpered, rolling your hips against his.

“Shh…” He soothed, hands gliding across your ass. Sensing that he was going to try and flip you, you kept your weight centered firmly above him.

“I wanna be on top.” You pleaded. “Just need out of these shorts…”

Cale wasn’t responding quickly enough, so you pushed the fabric of your shorts off of your own hips, shifting as little as possible while attempting to kick them off and onto the floor.

“Let me…” You cut off Cale’s statement by raising your hips and lowering yourself onto his dick, a gasp spilling from your throat as you felt him slipping deep inside you.

“Yes…” You hissed, the stretch of your body around him filling you with a warmth and ache that you had missed so much. As you started shallowly leveraging yourself up before dropping back down your eyes met Cale’s deep azure orbs, the look in them heightening your arousal.

“So wet.” Cale eventually groaned. “My girl doesn’t even need foreplay after blowing me to be this soaking wet. Fuck.”

Though one of Cale’s hands fell to your hips, you were the one putting in all of the effort to fuck yourself on his cock.

“You’re so needy...fucking yourself...just using my body for your pleasure. So much for wanting to take care of me tonight.” Sinking down on him again, you purposely tightened your vaginal walls against him, drawing another moan from his chest.

“Hmm...I think me doing all the work...letting you cum inside me while you just lay there is taking pretty good care of you…” You corrected. Your thighs were starting to burn from bouncing on top of him but your orgasm was within arm’s reach and there was no way you were stopping before ensuring you both got to climax.

“My girl is close.” Cale groaned. “Cum for me sweetheart...let me feel that tight heat clamp down on me.”

Cale’s words pushed you over the edge and you sunk down on him in exhaustion as your body shook with your orgasm. Spurts of Cale’s semen filled you from deep inside and you whimpered at the feeling, warm from head to toe. As you collapsed against him, still connected intimately, Cale’s fingers played with the ends of your hair.

“I can’t get enough of you.” Cale whispered a few minutes later, his cock starting to harden inside of you again.

“Again?” You inquired, a little bit in disbelief that his rebound time was this fast.

“Only if you want to.” He assured you. “But I’ll take over, you can relax and enjoy this time.” This time when Cale attempted to roll the two of you over, you went willingly, staring up at him. Before moving, Cale settled your legs up over his shoulders and when he thrust inside of you, you cried out softly at the feeling of him brushing against your g-spot.

“I got you sweetheart...just tell me what you need.” Cale sighed, pleasure lacing his tone.

The sound of your skin smacking together and the squelch of your mixed bodily fluids rang in your ears.

“Talk to me…” You pleaded. “Like before.” You weren’t afraid to admit that hearing Cale dirty talk had pushed you so much closer to orgasm than you would have been otherwise.

“Yeah?” Cale breathed, his cheeks turning bright red again as you nodded. “You feel so good like this sweetheart. You’re even wetter than before. So tight too.” Every movement he made brushed against your g-spot and you couldn’t help the litany of noises that fell from your lips at the feeling.

“You like it when I fuck you like this huh?” He continued. “Your pussy stretches around me so nicely, just welcoming me inside. Do you like being fucked nice and deep like this? Feeling each ridge of me against your walls...feeling me spill deep inside you?” Crying out again, your head tossed back and forth against the pillow, your orgasm creeping up on you quickly.

“You do like feeling me spill inside of you don’t you? That’s why you wanted to stop using condoms. You like being skin to skin with me, feeling me raw you bare. You like being filled with my warm sticky cum, the way it drips out of you if I let it…”

Your vision went black for a moment as your orgasm crashed down on you hard. The muscles in your thighs spasmed painfully, but you barely noticed through the waves of pleasure that rippled through you, leaving you panting. As your body clenched around him again, you felt Cale spill inside of you for the second time tonight.

Carefully he pulled out of you before kissing your lips lightly.

“Be right back.” He declared, disappearing into the bathroom. He returned with a washcloth and after wiping down your thighs, he offered you a hand so that you could go to the bathroom yourself. When you returned to the bedroom, Cale handed you a t-shirt to wear before guiding you under the covers.

“So dirty talk huh…?” He chirped, his nose brushing against the top of your head.

“Shut up and turn the tv on Cale.” You replied, feeling heat flood your cheeks. Chuckling, Cale complied, but as he handed you the remote to pick a show he couldn’t help but get in the last word.

“It’s hot. I enjoyed it.” Shaking your head, you snuggled against him just basking in what was left of the afterglow.

“And for the record...you can always surprise me with lingerie. I’m definitely into that as well.”

Lingerie:

[dirtydobrik]

marry me - d.d.

plot: while on vacation, you and your boyfriend, david, spontaneously decide to get married

word count: 2,375

masterlist

"I'm so in love with you, David Dobrik," you murmured, planting a soft kiss on his jawline. You were curled up next to him with your backs against the headboard of the hotel bed, looking out at the Hawaiian sunset. The door to the balcony was open to welcome the gentle breeze and the scent of the ocean. His arm was draped over your shoulder and your hand was holding his while your head was resting on his chest. You wanted moments like this one forever. "Let's get married tomorrow."

"What?" David asked with a chuckle, pulling away from you and staring at you. A look of realization crossed his face, "You're serious?"

You nodded, a smile across your face. "Yeah," you whispered, glancing up at him. You were trying to read his expressions to see if he was on the same page as you with this idea.

"We've only been together for a year. I mean, we haven't even talked about moving in together," he said hesitantly, and your face fell. David quickly noticed and tried to backtrack. "Not that I don't want you to move in, I was going to suggest it in a couple months when your apartment lease was almost up," he insisted. "And anyways, don't you want a big, fancy wedding?"

You shook your head. "I thought I did," you shrugged. "But sitting here with you right now, none of that matters. I just realized I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I don’t see why we should wait if we know we want to be together forever, you know?"

David ran his fingers through his hair, taking a deep breath. He stood from his spot on the bed and started pacing back and forth, trying to process what you were saying. His mind began to wander, as he thought about how his friends and family would react if he got married in secret, how his lawyer would react, and how his fans would feels.

He stayed quiet for too long and your heart sank.

"You know, just forget I said anything," you said, trying to hide the disappointment in your voice. You quickly wiped away the tears that were filling your eyes. You had hoped he would've been even a little bit excited about bringing up the idea of marriage.

"Babe," he sighed, standing at the edge of the bed. He reached out and took your hands in his. "I love you, you know that. And I do want to marry you. I just, I don't know if it's a good idea. I don't know how my lawyers and immigration will feel about me eloping," he tried to explain. You nodded and forced a smile, understanding where he was coming from, but you were still upset.

"I get it, Dave," you promised, trying to convince yourself that you believed what you were saying.

"I'm not saying no, okay? I promise I would marry you right now if I knew I could," he reassured you, kissing the top of your head. “I love you." He let go of your hands and stepped into his shoes. He gave you a quick peck, although his mind was elsewhere.  

"Where are you going?" you questioned, as he rummaged through his things, searching for his phone and wallet. There was a distance in David's eyes and you knew his mind was somewhere else. You sighed, growing annoyed that he had ignored your question.

You looked out at the waves crashing on the beach, the sky painted shades of pink and orange with the sun dipping below the horizon, wondering what David's lawyer would say about the wedding. You were deep in thought about what they would think that you didn't notice David slip one of your rings into his pocket before heading out.

 He googled the closest jeweler and took the rental car, calling his lawyer on the way even though it was almost midnight there.

"It's risky, Dave," his lawyer said, explaining that eloping was often a sign of a fraudulent marriage when it came to illegal immigrants. "I can't tell you what to do, but I would advise against doing this. I mean, I know you and your girlfriend and I will vouch for you and the reality of the situation, but it's tricky. You'll have to have a strong case if people question the validity of the marriage."

David groaned, that wasn't the answer he hoped for. But after talking things over with his lawyer, they agreed that they would be able to build a strong enough case between all of the video evidence and receipts from vacations where singular hotel rooms were booked with only one bed. With his lawyer agreeing to let him go through with the marriage, he headed into the jeweler.

The sales associate welcomed him with a warm smile.

"I need an engagement ring and two wedding bands by tonight, if possible," David said, looking hopeful.

"Big day?" she asked, and Dave nodded, a smile stretched across his face.

"My girlfriend decided she wants to get married tomorrow and I can't let her get married without a ring."

"That's exciting," she smiled, pulling out a tray of rings in your size that could be taken home today. He went for simple matching gold bands as the wedding rings but he had clue what type of diamond you wanted. "A simple, singular diamond is always a good option. But, if she wants to get married this suddenly, I don't think she's going to care about the ring."

"Yeah, you're right. I still want it to be something special," David said, his voice trailing off as one ring caught his eye. "That one," he insisted, pointing at one along the back edge of the tray. He knew would fall in love with it.

The sales associate pulled the ring out and handed it to David to look at. It had a round diamond in the center and the band was covered in smaller diamonds. It was so simple and looked so similar to other ones in the tray of rings, but something drew him to this one. The light reflected off of the diamonds and David could picture it on your ring finger. He paid for all three rings and thanked the associate for helping him out, stopping at a small stand for a bouquet of flowers on his way back to the hotel.

He walked down to the beach and used his finger to write Marry Me? in the sand. He called you and told you to meet you down on the beach to talk and you agreed. You slipped sandals on your feet and headed downstairs, anxious to hear what his lawyer had said. You saw him standing with his back to you and your heart started racing as you got closer and was able to make out the writing in the sand. He turned slowly and you saw the ring box in his hand. He handed you the bouquet of roses and got down on one knee.  

"David," you gasped, your hand covering your mouth as he opened the box, displaying the ring. "You didn't have to."

"I wanted to make it official," David explained, his hands shaking. "So, what do you say? Wanna get married tomorrow?"

"Oh my god," you breathed out, none of this seeming real. "Yes," you smiled, tears forming in your eyes. David slid the ring on to your finger and you bent down to give him a kiss, your hands cupping his face. He stood up and wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you tightly, as he picked you up and spun you around. You pressed your forehead to his, tears rolling down your cheek.  

"I love you, soon to be Mrs. Dobrik," he smiled, putting you down and kissing your forehead.

"I like the sound of that," you hummed, looking into his eyes. He pulled you into a tight hug, just holding you as you listened to the waves crash against the shore.

 You woke up to an empty bed and a note that read: It's bad luck to see the bride on the day of the wedding! I'll see on the beach at sunset. Love, your (almost) husband. You giggled at the note but appreciated the effort to be as traditional as possible with the untraditional way you had decided to tie the knot.  

You took a quick shower before heading out. You wanted to wear a white dress but you didn’t pack one. You stopped for a coffee and breakfast before searching local boutiques for your perfect dress. After no luck in four different stores, you were running out of patience and energy. As you walked into another store, a white satin dress was on the mannequin caught your eye and you knew you needed to try it on. It ended at your mid shins and it was so simple yet so elegant and classy. You did a quick twirl in the dressing room, admiring the dress, and decided to buy it.

"Just this?" the cashier asked, and you nodded. You swiped your card and she handed you the bag. "Thank you," you said, taking the bag and walking out into the humid Hawaiian air.

Your mind began to wander as you thought about returning to LA. How would you tell your friends that you and David had gotten married? Would they be mad? Would you have to end your lease early and move into David's house? Would Natalie move out? How would his fans react?

There were so many unknowns and questions and you were beginning to wonder if this was a good idea. Sure, you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him, but you were beginning to realize that a marriage was more complicated than just being in love.

You brushed off your worries. You wanted to marry him and he wanted to marry you, and it didn't need to any more complicated than that.

You walked back into the hotel room, setting the bag down on the floor and seeing a large bouquet of white and purple flowers on the bed. You smiled at how thoughtful David was, and changed into comfy clothes to spend the next couple hours getting ready.

You grabbed a notepad and wrote a letter to David for him to read after the ceremony. You sprayed a squirt of your perfume on the letter and left it on his pillow. You also wrote your own vows, since you weren't sure if David was doing the same. Even if you didn’t read your own vows during the ceremony, you wanted to have them written so you could share them with him after.

 You finished doing your hair and makeup with 10 minutes to spare.

Your heart was pounding as you stepped into your dress and zipped it up. You slid on a pair of white sandals on and grabbed the bouquet that was left on your bed. You looked in the mirror and had to hold back tears. All of a sudden you wished your parents were here to see you get married.

You stepped out on to the balcony, looking down at the beach. David had offered to take care of everything, but you weren't sure how capable he was of doing so. However, you saw a photographer standing next to David, and a minister walking over to them.

You took a deep breath and headed down to the beach. The photographer was waiting for you in the lobby, wanting to get a few shots before you walked outside, and then followed you down to the beach.

The boardwalk was lined with white rose petals, with David standing at the end in a white button up with dress pants. He smiled at you, quickly wiping tears away as you walked down the beach to him. You giggled with excitement as he reached for your hands.

The ceremony was a blur to the both of you and you couldn't believe it had really happened. The night was spent in pure bliss, excited to be married to each other and ready to start the next chapter of your lives together.

 A couple days later, you stepped off the plane at LAX, ready to return to reality. You had already told your friends and family at home, but you and Dave hadn't decided how to tell everyone in LA.

Natalie was helping put your suitcases in the trunk when she caught sight of your engagement ring. She immediately reached out and grabbed your hand, pulling it close to her to examine it when she noticed the wedding band alongside the diamond.

"Holy shit," she whispered.

"Surprise?" you chuckled.

"Oh my god, congrats," she exclaimed, giving you a hug. "Tell me everything."

You climbed into the car and began telling the story, David constantly interrupting to share it from his perspective.

You decided to announce it by having Natalie plan an engagement party for the two of you. 

"So, we actually have one more thing to tell you guys," David said, earning the attention of the crowd. "We didn't just get engaged."

"We got married," you interrupted, watching a range of emotions wash over everyone.

Their voices overlapped as they congratulated you and questioned why you did it in secret and so quickly.

After telling all of your friends and family, the only people left to tell where the fans. You scrolled through the pictures the wedding photographer had sent you, picking out your favorite. You were sitting on David's lap with your left arm draped over his shoulder, displaying your ring. David picked a picture of you looking at each other and holding hands during the ceremony, the minister and the sunset sinking into the ocean behind the two of you.

You posted it to Instagram, choosing a quote as your caption to keep it simple: "when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

David kept his post short and sweet, reading: September 12th. The day my best friend became my wife.

[karasuno-chaos]

Summer Heat (Noya x Reader)

I just survived a heat streak that felt like it lasted FOREVER so have some fluff with Best Boy Noya trying to beat the heat. -Giz

Word Count: 2,601

“It’s sooo hot,” your boyfriend complained for the fifth time since leaving the convenience store.  You had gone to buy more popsicles to try and beat the heat.  Noya had eaten his in two bites.  You were desperately trying not to let what was left of yours melt all over your hand.

It was ridiculously hot and had been for the past two days.  The forecast promised the heat would continue.  You weren’t sure how your boyfriend would survive.  Noya naturally ran warm, but he was also incredibly tactile.  This heat made it too hot to hold hands and cuddle comfortably, and you could tell that was part of what bothered him so much about this weather.

“Want another popsicle?” you offered.

“No,” he sighed.  “I’d just like this damn heat to go away.”

“Me too.”  You stuck the now-bare popsicle stick in your mouth to suck the rest of the flavor out of it.  “It’s so hot I don’t want to do anything but sit in front of the fan all day.”

“It makes life boring.”

He looked so disappointed that you took pity on him and slipped your hand into his.  He shot you a brief, bright smile.  Something of his normal bounce returned, and he swung your arms gently as you walked the last few blocks home.

A few minutes later, you were both lying on the floor in front of a fan pretending the blowing air was effectively counteracting the heat.

“We could watch a movie,” you suggested.  You were trying to brainstorm things to do with minimal discomfort.

“But we can’t cuddle,” he pouted.  He had hooked his pinky with yours to appease his need for physical contact.  You chuckled.

“We don’t cuddle for half of the movie anyways because you get so into things.  You’re always jumping up and yelling at the TV.”

“That’s not true.”

“It’s okay babe.”  You shifted a bit to kiss his cheek.  “Besides, I’m not sure I’m in the mood for a movie right now.”

“It’s hard to be in the mood for anything because it’s so damn hot,” he sighed.

You lapsed into resigned silence, the hum of the fan on high a constant reminder of nature’s rebellion against acceptable temperatures.  You wanted to do something more than just complain.  Noya would be leaving for a training camp in Tokyo tomorrow, and your parents were visiting friends out of town for the night, so this was prime date time.  If only you could ignore this insufferable heat.

“Too bad we don’t live near a beach,” you sighed, attempting to stretch away the discomfort.  “Then at least we could go swimming.”

“We could go to the pool.”

“It’ll be super crowded on a day like today.  Besides, last time I went to the pool, I got kicked in the nose by a kid.”

“What?”  Noya sat up quickly to look at you.  “When was this?”

“The end of last summer.  I wasn’t paying enough attention and got too close to the back end of a flutter kick.”

“Are you okay?”

“It was nearly a year ago,” you laughed.  “Of course I’m okay.”

“Did the kid apologize?”

“I don’t really remember.”  You saw your boyfriend’s eyes narrow.  “I’m sure he did.”

“He better have.”

“Babe, it’s cute that you’re so ready to defend me, but we’re not going to track down some kid who accidentally kicked me a year ago to make him apologize.”

“I wasn’t going to track him down,” he grumbled, though you were sure the thought had crossed his mind.  “You just never know if kids these days know what proper respect is.”

“Those darn kids today,” you grouched in an impression of a grumpy old man that may have sounded something like his grandpa.  That wiped the scowl from his face.

The silence lapsed between you again, and you went back to wracking your brain for something to do.  Time passed slowly in the heat, but it was still ticking away.  Eventually Noya would have to leave to finish packing and sleep before his early morning departure.  You were excited he’d get to train and play against strong opponents, but you would miss him while he was at training camp.  Even if you weren’t doing anything right now, it was more enjoyable than being apart from him.

“I’ve got it!”  Noya sat up again with such speed he blurred momentarily.

“What?”

“I know how to beat the heat.  Maybe.”  He turned to you with an excited glint in his eyes.  “Sit tight babe.  I’ll be right back.”

Before you could ask where he was going, he had dropped a quick kiss on your lips and taken off.  You sighed, but his spontaneity was one of the many things you loved about him.  You would just wait and see what grand idea had struck him.  Either it would be brilliant or stupid, but it was guaranteed to be amusing.

You spent the next twenty-five minutes trying to ignore the discomfort of the heat.  You scrolled through your favorite social media feeds, thought briefly about what you wanted to do for dinner, and debated sticking your head under the faucet to cool down.  For a while, you lay in front of the fan making noises into the fins to amuse yourself with the distorted feedback.  There were only so many things to occupy you in this heat, especially when you were curious to know what your boyfriend was up to.

You were debating texting him for an update when you heard someone call your name from outside.  You hauled yourself to your feet and went to investigate.

“You’re back!” you greeted, discovering your boyfriend holding a large cardboard box.  “And you found a Tanaka.  Hi Ryuu.”

“Hey Y/N.”  He was also holding a large box.  You weren’t particularly surprised to see him as you had been best friends with him since your first year at Karasuno.  Even after you and Noya became official, it never felt like Tanaka was a third wheel when all of you hung out.

“Babe, go change into your swimsuit and meet us in the back,” Noya instructed.

“Why?  What are you up to?”

“You’ll see.”

You trusted him enough not to demand further explanation.  A few minutes later, you were grabbing some towels and heading to meet the boys in the back.

“Alright, I’m here,” you announced, dropping the towels in the doorway as you stepped onto the grass.

“Think fast!”

You shrieked in surprise when something collided with your side and burst, splashing you with water.

“Too slow,” Noya chuckled, already arming himself with another water balloon from one of the boxes.

“Wait, you have to give me a chance to put up a fair fight!” you laughed.  “I’m not prepared!”

“All’s fair in love and war,” he quipped.  He launched another balloon at you, but you were able to jump away so it burst on the ground instead.  Before he could take aim again, Tanaka nailed him in the middle of his back.

“Go Y/N!  I’ll distract him!”

“Bro, the betrayal!”  Noya threw his next one at Tanaka who was already armed for a follow-up strike.  His efforts distracted your boyfriend enough for you to grab a few water balloons and jump into the fray.

The three of you ran around your yard pelting water balloons at each other.  Even though it was still oppressively hot, it was a lot of fun, and getting splashed repeatedly with water did a lot to cool you down.  You cackled when you hit your target and yelped when you got nailed in return.  There was always a chance to get back at them because you had a seemingly endless supply of ammunition.  You didn’t know where they’d gotten so many water balloons, but they were effectively keeping you cool and entertained.

Suddenly you heard a surprised shout from Tanaka.  An errant balloon was making its way towards a glass garden decoration that was an anniversary gift from your father to your mother--definitely not something you wanted to break.  You rushed forward to try and intercept it, but you were on the opposite side of the yard.  You wouldn’t get to it in time.

“Rolling thunder!”

Noya reacted immediately, flying into his signature receive.  You were always in awe of his reflexes, and you were particularly thankful for them now.  He rolled into position, prepared to bump the balloon away only to have it burst against his forearms.

The three of you blinked, processing the last few seconds before you and Tanaka burst into relieved laughter.

“Wait, wait, I want to try that again.  Toss me another one.”  Noya crouched in his ready position.

“Really?” Tanaka asked.

“Yeah, I want to see if I can actually receive one.”

“It’ll probably just burst in your face again,” you warned.

“That just makes it more fun.”

“Okay, but maybe we should move away from breakable things first.”

After picking a less dangerous part of the yard, you and Tanaka took turns tossing balloons.  The next few minutes were filled with shouts of “rolling thunder” and bursting balloons and laughter.  Every once in a while, Noya managed to send it back, but it burst as soon as someone else touched it.

“They’re too unstable for a proper volley,” Tanaka sighed while wiping some water from his face.

“Come on, there are a few balloons left.  Let’s keep trying!” your boyfriend insisted.

“Ryuu, try spiking a few at him,” you suggested, tossing to your friend instead.  The failures were more spectacular when they were spikes instead of receives.  Water cascaded in sparkling arcs and tickled all three of you.  When Tanaka did get a spike in, the balloon usually burst against Noya’s forearms.  There were a few times he managed to get it airborne again only for it to split before you could get to it.

You could see the bottom of the remaining box of balloons.  Now that you weren’t the target, you were drying off and starting to feel the heat again.  You were getting thirsty.  You remembered that you had a watermelon in the fridge.  Maybe you’d cut it up after this and share some with the boys.

“Y/N!  Set it!  Set it!”

Suddenly both Noya and Tanaka were shouting to you.  A water balloon was travelling in a graceful arc toward you, sent on its way by your boyfriend’s successful receive.  You had just enough time to throw up your hands and get your fingertips under it to try and send it back to Tanaka.  Of course it chose to burst the moment you put pressure on it, dumping all of its contents on you.

“No!” Tanaka cried.  “We were so close!”

“You good babe?” Noya asked, stepping toward you.

“Yeah,” you laughed, wiping your face.  “I just wasn’t ready for it.”

“We’ve got seven more balloons,” Tanaka announced.

“Let’s see if we can get it with the next one.”

Seven balloons later, you had attempted another set which burst in your face.  The other attempts had ended well short of getting to you.  You were a little disappointed you hadn’t succeeded, but if you were being honest, you hadn’t expected any of the balloons to hold up to both a spike and a receive.

“Argh, we were so close!” Tanaka griped.

“We could go buy more balloons,” Noya suggested.

“Or you two could pick up all of the bits on the ground so we don’t murder any birds.  I’m going to cut up some watermelon.”

“Sounds like a fair trade.”

You rubbed yourself down with one of the towels and picked bits of grass off of your feet before heading inside.  A few minutes later, you reemerged with a tray of watermelon and glasses of water.  The boys were just finishing the cleanup.

“You missed one,” you teased, sitting down in the shade.

“We were getting to it.”  Noya grabbed an orange scrap before scanning the yard for others.

“That’s probably good enough.  I can grab whatever’s left later.”  You gestured to the tray of snacks.  “Come get some watermelon before it warms up.”

The three of you munched in the shade, chatting and competing to see who could spit their seeds the farthest.  The sun had started its descent, alleviating some of the brutality of the heat.  It was fun to hang out with the boys after an afternoon of activity.

“So Ryuu, are you ready for Tokyo?”

“Hell yeah!  We’re going to show those city boys how volleyball is really played.”  He spat another seed a respectable distance.

“Yeah, we’re going to kick their asses!” Noya whooped.

“I wish I could go with you guys.  It sounds like a lot of fun.”

“Nah,” Tanaka scoffed, “it’ll just be a lot of sweaty guys hitting balls, talking smack, and complaining about the heat and sore muscles.”

“It still sounds more fun than staying here.”

“You could’ve joined us if you’d become our manager,” Noya reminded you.

“Yeah, yeah.”  It was a conversation you’d had quite often at the beginning of your first year and intermittently since.  “I have to look after you two all day at school and half of the time when we’re not at school.  Someone else can watch you for a few hours during volleyball.”

“Are you saying you get tired of us?”  Noya pouted comically.

“You, no,” you reassured him with a kiss on the cheek.  “Ryuu?  Maybe.”

“Hey!”

“I’m kidding,” you laughed.  “You know I love you Ryuu.  I just love Yuu more.”

“Okay, if you’re going to get all couple-y then I’m leaving.”  Tanaka stood and stretched.  “I have to get ready for tomorrow anyway.”

You said goodbye to your friend before bringing the empty glasses inside, depositing the watermelon rinds in the compost along the way.  Your boyfriend delivered the used towels to the washroom before joining you in the kitchen to help with the cleanup.  You paused in your washing to give him a kiss.

“What was that for?” he asked, a bright grin spreading across his face.

“Can’t I just kiss my boyfriend if I feel like it?”

“Of course!”  He wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you in for another kiss.  You leaned in for more.

Half an hour later, the dishes were finally done and you were walking Noya to the door.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay here alone?” he asked.  “You could come over, at least for dinner.”

“I’ll be fine,” you reassured him.  “Besides, if I joined you, you’d never pack or get enough sleep before your trip, and I don’t want you to be wiped for your first day of training camp.”

“I don’t want to leave you, though,” he whined, pulling you into a tight hug.  “I’m going to miss you.”

“I’m going to miss you too,” you sighed.  “But it’ll only be for a week.”

“Don’t forget about me, okay?”

“I could never,” you promised, giving him a kiss before stepping back.  “I’ll get more balloons for after your trip, so practice your receives.”

“I’m going to get so good, I’ll bump every balloon back to you.”

“I look forward to it,” you called as he started heading home.  About three houses away, he turned back to look at you.

“Hey Y/N!”

“Yeah?”

“I love you!”

“I love you too!” you shouted.  He laughed and did a happy little leap before continuing on his way.  You watched him until he was out of sight.  When you turned to go back inside, you were feeling warm from something other than the heat.

[stularsen]

I feel like it's the right time to share PART TWO of the craziness that happened back in March 2020 as I am currently attempting the exact same journey in December from England to France and am being met with similarly impossible hurdles again... THE HURRICANE vs THE CORONAVIRUS (part two) Escaping from England to France, the long way round..

MARCH 2020 After the absolute rollercoaster of attempting to play eleven shows in eleven countries all around the world in the same month that a global pandemic arrived, these next days would be smooth and I would quickly and easily make it into France to stay with my girlfriend and her family. This is what I hoped for. So, I booked a flight from London Gatwick to Lyon and headed to the airport with my passport, a letter and accompanying document to allow me to enter France. The check-in process was straight forward, my suitcase disappeared and I headed to wait at the appropriate gate, first in line. I was already feeling somewhat at peace with the cancelled tour and my focus shifted to visiting Mathéa and her family. Boarding commenced and I handed over my passport and boarding pass which is where things started to get a little interesting.. The lady behind the desk looked at my passport and turned to her colleague to ask a question before letting me know that I would not be able to board the flight. I didn’t believe it. I showed the the letter and the document but they said it meant absolutely nothing to them. I pleaded, but there was nothing they could do. I pleaded some more and Mathéa pleaded with them over the phone. We knew there was no chance they would be able to do anything, but I just couldn’t walk away. After all the things that stood in the way in the previous weeks which we had overcome, this was now the last piece of the puzzle, refusing to fall into place. I eventually and reluctantly took my passport, boarding pass, letter and document with me and went to join a group of people waiting to collect their luggage after also being kicked off flights. It was chaos. So many people stranded and in far worse situations than mine. Some crying, some shouting at staff. I stood quietly but impatiently waiting for my name to be called, to then be led with about ten others back through the airport to another waiting area where our luggage would soon arrive. It didn’t. Well not mine at least. Everyone else disappeared within a few minutes but I was left waiting on my own for almost an hour. During this time, I was wondering what the next plan should be. I knew there would be a ferry leaving from Newhaven for France later that night, so I quickly booked a ticket. Maybe I would be faced with the same problem again, or maybe going by ferry would be less strictly controlled? I really didn’t know what might happen but I felt like I had to take a chance and see if I could at least make it into the north of France and then somehow find my way across the country to Mathéa’s family home in the east, near to the border with Switzerland. With my suitcase rolling along beside me, a heavy pack on my back and a train ticket for the south, I approached the ticket gates to enter the station. I soon realised they were not letting anyone through so I squeezed to the front to see if I could hear any explanations for the closure or if they knew how long the delay might be. It was chaos again with more impatient people struggling to hide their frustration. I had plenty of time before the ferry departure so I wasn’t particularly worried at this point in time. While I waited, I was answering messages on my phone and replied to one from Guido, a very kind fan from Germany. I told him about my situation and he then suggested that I take the next available flight to an airport within a few hours from his house in Rheinbach and he would pick me up from there and take me by car back to his home. It was perhaps my best chance to get to mainland Europe and then I would be only one land border away from France and not separated by the English Channel. I was suddenly thankful for the disruption with the trains at the airport. I rushed back from the train station to the first airline ticket counter I could find and waited in line, surrounded by more frustrated people arguing with staff. The mood was not pleasant. People seemed scared and angry and I remember thinking that if I had a home that I was being stopped from going back to, I might be quite angry and frustrated too. But for me, if I really couldn’t get into France, then I would find somewhere to stay for the coming weeks and it would be okay. Amsterdam was my next and best option and Guido agreed to meet me there, around three hours driving from his house. Just before I paid for the flight, I was told that I might have the same problem again and not be allowed on the flight and into The Netherlands, but I was willing to risk it for now. Ticket in hand I rushed over to the check-in counter to drop off my suitcase. They scanned my passport, it beeped in a non-positive way, I froze, waiting to see what would happen next. She said there was a problem. Of course there was a problem, there is always a problem.. unless there’s not? It could have been a mistake, maybe? With some confidence, I simply asked her to try again on the unlikely chance that it was just a computer error.. She scanned my passport again and I heard the other, more positive sounding beep. We both laughed. Somehow, it’s fine. She asked me to hurry to the gate because the flight would be boarding very soon. This time, they let me enter the plane. Boarding was smooth and even though I was now sitting on the tarmac ready to fly, I was still half expecting my name to be called over the speaker and be asked to disembark. Thankfully, that did not happen and shortly after take-off we began our descent into Amsterdam. The mood is strange. I’m in the ‘other passports’ line with my Australian passport and there are eight or nine people in front of me. One by one, every single person in front of me is turned away and asked to wait in a little side section. Surely I will suffer the same fate? When I got to the counter, I was asked if I knew about the current situation. I assumed he meant the situation with the virus and the impending shutdown of the entire world. He did. I said I was being picked up by a friend and driven to Germany and he told me that if I was not across the border and out of The Netherlands by 6pm I would be stranded and this is something he would not allow. He didn’t want to let me in, I could feel it. He wanted to send me to wait with the other group but instead he made me guarantee that I would be in Germany before 6pm. I promised. Besides, it wouldn’t be a problem, Guido would be there to pick me up and drive me back to his home. With my passport stamped and feeling such relief, I happily move through to find my suitcase and walk to the airport hotel where Guido and I agreed to meet. As I sit down and finally relax a little, I receive a message from Guido saying he is still two hours away. It is almost 3pm. This means we will not have enough time to make it back into Germany and we will both be stuck in The Netherlands when the border closes at 6pm. Do I tell him to turn around to go home and I find the next solution on my own? I was starting to worry a little and I wondered what I should do as I hurried back to the airport. As I arrived, I looked at the train timetable and spontaneously bought a train ticket to Nijmegen and Guido agreed to meet me there as it’s close to the border with Germany. Perfect, I think this will give us enough time. I’m feeling okay again, waiting on the platform for the train to arrive. But a few minutes later, I look back up to the screen and read ‘CANCELLED’. Of course it’s cancelled. Why wouldn’t it be? This was one of those moments when I really wasn’t sure what to do. It had already been quite a tense time and I was wondering if I should keep trying to get to France or if I just call it a day and stop. I tried to call Mathéa to get her to help find some options, but she was off doing yoga. I then asked a friend in Amsterdam if she would let me stay if I really got stranded. She said yes, so at least I had this as a backup. In the meantime I booked an uber from the airport to a point on the map somewhere in the east but the wait time just kept saying fifteen minutes so I cancelled and jumped in a taxi. He asked ‘Where to?’ I don’t know, just drive. Drive east towards Germany. ‘But where are you trying to go?’ I told him I was eventually trying to get into France. He said he would take me there for a good price. I declined and found an address halfway between Guido and I, on the edge of Utrecht at a restaurant conveniently named ‘Down Under’. After an eternity of watching the price increase on the little screen in the front, the driver drops me off, I pay him a lot of money and he says he can still take me to France if I want. I thank him and say goodbye. Guido is still not there. ‘Down Under’ is closed. I’m hungry and need to use the bathroom. I walk to another place nearby, but it’s also closed. I see a McDonalds down the road and walk there, but only the drive-thru is open and they won’t allow me to buy food or enter to use the bathroom. Things are getting serious. Guido turns up after another twenty minutes and I am so relieved to be out of the cold and with Guido who will take me to safety in Germany. We crossed the border at 5:45pm. They seemed to be setting up light towers as we glided out of 120km/h zoned Dutch roads and onto Germany’s autobahn. This felt like a big achievement. I felt safe now. Only one border separated me from Mathéa and I could stay in Germany if I really couldn’t make it into France. I slept very well this night. The following morning, we were wondering if I would be able to enter the north of France and have Mathéa come and pick me up at the border, but movement was already heavily restricted in France so this was not an option. People were also saying that both the French and Swiss borders with Germany were completely closed to anyone without a valid reason and valid documentation. It was beginning to look like I would be living with Guido and Yvonne and their boys for the days and weeks ahead. There just didn’t seem to be any possible or legal way to cross into France or even into Switzerland which would be helpful too. I think I was almost ready to give up when Thomas (amazing human and tour manager from the Hurricane Tour) sent a message asking what was happening. Thomas is one of those people who has taught me to never give up, that there is always a way, even when it seems impossible. He had booked the cheapest flight back to Germany (he is also very frugal) which happened to be into Cologne/Bonn which was not too far from where I was staying with Guido and Yvonne. He said together we would find the way for me to get into Switzerland and then I could get into France from there. Okay Thomas, let’s do this! Thomas landed and rented a car at the airport then came to pick me up. I waved goodbye to my German saviours who seemed very adamant, and rightfully so, that we would be seeing each other again later that day after my failed attempt to cross into Switzerland. There was still no plan for when we would arrive at the border but we were coming up with all sorts of ideas as we drove the five hours south towards Basel. Do I just try to walk across a field? Or go through a mountain path? Or in a boat down the river? Or in the back of a truck or a van? Or is there still a legal way to enter Switzerland somehow? I asked my good friend Pascal if he might have any genius ideas as he lives in Switzerland near the border, just outside Basel. He also makes amazing guitars (La Réselle Guitars) and had finished building a guitar that I was to buy from him. Pascal and his girlfriend Melina had a genius idea and within the hour he had emailed me a letter stating that I was entering Switzerland to pick up the guitar and as it was a business reason, it was allowed under the current rules from the government website as long as I would not be staying in Switzerland. I was nervous to try just with the letter, so I booked a flight out of Switzerland for the next day and as Thomas is the most amazing tour manager ever, of course he still had his printer with him in his backpack. We printed Pascal’s letter in German and in English and a copy of the boarding pass for the flight and headed to Freiburg to catch a train into Switzerland. I had asked Mathéa if she could cancel any yoga plans for the day and be available to search things and check information for us. She found out that all trains crossing the border were now cancelled out of Freiburg but that there should still be a tram running and maybe I could get on the tram and cross into Switzerland that way? Thomas dropped me at the tram stop. We said goodbye and I jumped on the next tram and attempted to cross the border. I followed the map on my phone. The tram was half full. I was nervous and I’m sure people could see it. The tram made a few brief stops and then we arrived at the border. Two police entered the tram saying something in German. One came to me and I handed him my ticket. He insisted I show him my passport. He didn’t even open it, he just saw ‘Australia’ on the front and said ‘Get Out’. I tried to explain. ‘GET OUT!’ I tried to stay calm and composed and explain again as I reached into my bag for Pascal’s letter and the boarding pass to hand over to him. He unfolded the letter to look at it. In my mind, one hour passed. In reality, it was probably closer to one very long minute. He didn’t say a word, he just kept staring at the letter. He eventually folded it back up, handed it to me with my passport and walked over to his colleague. I waited for him to ask me to go with them. But he didn’t say anything. Instead, they both step out, the doors close and the tram continues to move. I’m in Switzerland!! I try not to show too much emotion, everyone is still staring at me after this little incident. The tram arrives at the station in Basel. I’m constantly looking over my shoulder, I still can’t relax. I wait for Pascal, he’s on his way to pick me up. I’m waiting on the wrong side of the station, I have to walk back through again. I’m so nervous that the police or someone will stop me and ask me what I am doing. I see Pascal walking towards me from the other side of the station. It’s slow motion, just like the movies. I’m so relieved to see him, to be in Switzerland, to be safe for another night. We want to hug each other but we keep our distance and try to avoid any chance of potentially sharing the virus. I stay the night with Pascal and Melina and know that I’m so close to being with Mathéa now. Pascal drops me and the new guitar at the train station the next morning and I make my way south to Geneva which is then only thirty minutes and one closed border away from Mathéa. The plan was for her to try to enter Switzerland to pick me up and take me back into France but the police at the Swiss border would not let her enter. By now I have learned that there is always a Plan B, so at this point I wasn’t feeling too much stress. I had been told so many times in the previous weeks that something was impossible, and each time, simply by moving forward, a solution to each problem appeared. I had no doubt something positive would happen and I would be in Mathéa’s arms again. And then it happened. Mathéa phoned me and said the Swiss border police suggested I get a taxi or a bus from the station and I could cross into France as the French police were not actually there at that moment. People were being stopped from entering Switzerland but nobody was being stopped leaving Switzerland and entering France. But how long would the French police be away from their post? I jumped in a bus that was headed for Saint-Julien-en-Genevois, the first French town across the border. It would take twenty excruciating minutes for this bus to reach the border. I was the only passenger on board. I tried to act calm and relaxed but I have to assume that the driver noticed how nervous I was. Mathéa was also nervous. She waited in the carpark just over the border and could still see vehicles crossing into France without being stopped. Would it be the same for the bus I was on? These final moments seemed to last longer than the actual time that had passed since being kicked off the initial flight from London to Lyon. Then, all of a sudden, I could see the border and Mathéa could see the bus. We were so close now. On the final approach the bus driver started to slow down and in that moment I felt like everything was about to come to a final heartbreaking halt and I would be stopped just metres away from France and the girl that I love. My heart almost burst out of my chest as I realised the bus wasn’t stopping at the border, we were driving through to France, I had made it!! I frantically hit the ‘next stop’ button then clambered off with my backpack, suitcase and new guitar and ran over to the carpark into the waiting arms of Mathéa. (I wish that is how this last bit actually happened, but she was too scared to get out of her car so I first had to put my luggage in the back and then get into the front and have a slightly awkward but still very enjoyable side-by-side hug). It felt incredible to now be in each other’s arms after being told time and time again that it was just not possible. It was a miracle to be here and I knew it. After a short twenty minute drive we arrived at her family home in the countryside where I would spend the next months and could properly relax after days and weeks of such uncertainty and constant adrenalin. The hurricane was finally over. (or was it....) 


[queerchoicesblog]

Another Way (BP, Aisha x MC)

So this is my first Bachelorette Party fanfic...and believe me, when I first saw the ads I would have never expected to write for this book but then Aisha Bhatt happened. And this is my way to give back for that, if you wish. This fanfic takes place a few time after the rooftop scene with Aisha where the two of them confessed their mutual crush.

In short, Aisha goes checking on Amanda (MC) who suddenly retreated to their room while Di and Court discuss how to deal with Skip at the hotel bar. She finds her on the balcony grieving her hurtful break-up. I know BP is a light-hearted book but that was harsh and I’m surprised MC doesn’t seem troubled at all by that!

Word Count: 11870

Perma Tag: @brightpinkpeppercorn @bhavf  @melodyofgraves @abunchofbadchoices @silverhawkenzie @begging-for-kamilah @kennaxval @strangerofbraidwood @crazypeanat @desiree-0816 @universallypizzataco

Aisha x MC Tag: @embarrassingsmartphonegame ( @emeryharper ?)

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Already half an hour had passed since Amanda left the ground floor bar the Girl Scouts gathered to discuss how to deal with the latest turn of events: Skip was on his way to Las Vegas to put an end to "the embarrassing debauchery of this bachelorette party of yours", he said. They were brainstorming about how to stop this "unacceptable interference" (Court's words) when Mandy's phone started beeping. Courtney and Di were so passionately debating whether to confront him directly or moving immediately to make it harder for him to find them that they didn't notice, but Aisha saw it. As soon as she read the name of the caller she immediately rejected the call and dropped the phone, sending it falling on the table as if it turned into a burning rock in her hands.

The thud of its fall made Courtney and Diana turn towards her. "Please tell me it wasn't him!" Di said, her voice almost shaking with anxiety. "What? No, Di! He doesn't even have my number" Di gave a troubled look then nodded and went back listening to the absurd plan Courtney was sharing with all of them. Amanda tried to follow the conversation but she looked distant, a thousand miles away. After a few minutes, she excused herself, saying that she had a terrible headache and left the table. When it was clear she wasn't coming back any time soon, Aisha took her leave too and went checking on her. She went straight to their hotel room hoping to find her there: it sounded the most logical choice and Amanda was a logical person as far as she knew. But she wasn't in her room nor hiding in the bathroom and not even in the living room. Aisha was about to try elsewhere when she spotted her silhouette on the balcony, her hair gently swaying in the night's breeze. Amanda was leaning over the railing gazing off into the distance and barely noticed her approaching. "Hey are you okay? You got me worried..." Aisha asked, moving closer and standing beside her. "Oh don't be, I'm good" Amanda shrugged as if to minimize. "My headache is subsiding, I just needed some fresh air" "You've always been the worst liar, Mandy" Aisha gave her a smile that failed to hide her concern. Then she sighed and added, diverting her eyes from her: "The call earlier...it was Kyle, wasn't it?" Amanda stiffened and clenched her jaw, but no word came out of her mouth. She just winced so Aisha spoke again. "Mandy, I know we all said that we're happy you broke up with her but that doesn't change what happened nor makes it any easier to process for you. You're allowed to grieve: if I got it right, you two have been together for a while..." "Two years. Well, almost...it would have been two years in two months" Amanda confirmed, grimacing. "Two years are quite some time. I just want you to know that you can come to us if you wanna talk about it. If it helps you, that is." She turned towards her. "You can come to me and this won't change anything between us" Amanda turned and gave her a pained look. "For real? I don't want you to think that this is just a rebound-" "I know, Mandy...and I trust you" Aisha reassured her, giving her hand a quick squeeze. "I just want to be there for you" Amanda stared deeply into her dark eyes for a moment to assure she was saying the truth then slowly moved closer and rested her head over her long-time crush's shoulder. Aisha immediately wrapped her arm around her waist as if to sustain her, to anchor her when a wave of sorrow was threatening to hit the young lawyer. "I feel so stupid, Aisha. So stupid and naïve and...hurt" she sighed and shut her eyes. Reminiscing that day was so painful. She could still remember the carefree excitement she felt driving home: she even sang along with the radio, tapping the wheel in sync with the beat. She mentally praised herself for what a great spot she had found to hide the gorgeous lingerie she bought as a special gift for their anniversary: there were still a couple of months left but she decided to be more spontaneous -as Kyle suggested more than once - and surprise her girlfriend that night. Kyle wouldn't have been home for a while so she would have had plenty of time to set the mood for a romantic night. She wasn't done coming up with ideas and foretasting the look on Kyle's face when...it all crumbled to pieces. Not just their night but everything. So she shut down her feelings and packed her suitcase: direction Las Vegas. "If there's one thing romcoms teach you is: never get home earlier than expected to make a sweet surprise to your partner because..." Amanda paused, overwhelmed by the weight of what came next. "...because the surprise you find is never sweet. I should have watched more romcoms maybe" "What are you saying?" Aisha asked, hoping that she got it all wrong. Amanda laughed, but her laughter was bitter, hollow...it told of pain rather than actual humor. "You should watch more romcoms too apparently, huh? It just means that the day Courtney called I came home earlier than expected because I wanted to surprise Kyle...and it went all wrong. I was getting ready when she came home and", Amanda swallowed hard: here goes the toughest part of the story... "and she stormed into our bedroom lip-locked with a girl" "What?!" "That was just the beginning: a moment later, a guy in a banana suit joined them. My guess? For a threesome" "Mandy she cheated on you?? What the fuck!" Aisha exclaimed. She tried to keep her cool but she was furious inside: not only that Kyle was the grossest and most idiotic girl she had ever met to the point she couldn't help but wonder what a smart brilliant young woman like Amanda saw in her, but apparently she was also too blind to understand what a gem she had by her side. So stupid to take her for granted, to cover her with lies and betray her trust in the most hurtful way. Amanda didn't deserve any of this. Amanda, her beautiful beloved Amanda...she would have never hurt her or treated her like that if she was her girlfriend. But Aisha missed so many chances...and Kyle was there to take them. Unlike her, Kyle had the guts to approach her at a party, ask her out on a date and, a few months later, to be her girlfriend. Aisha grimaced as realization sunk in. "Yeah but that's...nothing out of ordinary" Amanda sighed, bringing her back to the hotel balcony. "Nothing out of ordinary?" Aisha furrowed her brows. "Define 'ordinary' then cause I'm afraid I'm losing you here!" "I mean...in the long run girls tend to leave or choose someone else over me. Some say it out loud and clear, while others...well others let me find out myself" Aisha released her and gently turned her so that she could face the lawyer. She gave her a long intense stare, pressing her lips together as she searched the right words to say. "Mandy, this is not how healthy relationships work...nor love" "It's how they work for me, I guess" Amanda shrugged, wincing. "Maybe I am the problem after all...I'm almost sure that it wasn't even the first time that-" "Mandy, snap out of it and erase that thought! You are NOT the problem" Aisha interrupted her. "True, it takes two to tango and I am probably biased here but it seems to me that girls like Kyle were just jerks to you. Plain and simple. But Mandy, you are one of the most amazing, brilliant and thoughtful people I know. You're funny, even when you crack terrible jokes, you always come up with interesting things to say or facts to share and you're so...inherently, genuinely good! I...well, I don't know you as a girlfriend but you used to leave all those cute notes for us back in college, you drew smiles with jam over pancakes when I was mopey or stressed, and you, you're so kind and gorgeous and...how can you be THE problem? How can THIS be the problem? You...what I mean to say..." Aisha took a deep breath in an attempt to summon up all her courage to say the words that were left unsaid for so long, too long. It's now or never: please, self, don't mess it up again! "Let me show you that there's another way. Let me prove them wrong, Mandy" "You're not saying that just because I'm moping and pity-partying...right?" Amanda shyly bit her own lip. "No, no sweetheart" Aisha laughed softly and tenderly stroke the lawyer's cheek. "I seriously want to ask you out on a date when we catch a breath from this case and this bachelorette party, if there’s still a wedding to celebrate" Aisha flashed her a weak smile. "I've wanted to ask you out on a date for so long but...I chickened out" she blushed, lowering her eyes. Then, feeling Amanda's gaze on her, she looked back at her, putting on a shy smile filled with sudden hope. "If we get the briefcase back and I get my money, I can even take you to one of those fancy restaurants where the menu is filled with unpronounceable French names!" "But you said you have so many debts!" "I know but I could make an exception for once...for you" Aisha's cheeks reddened again and Amanda found herself smiling, a tired yet affectionate smile...the first that day. Aisha was so irresistibly cute when she allowed herself to take off the cynic tough girl mask and to be just herself. The 28 years old woman who would still blush like a teen when she finally stopped hiding her feelings and started fantasizing about "the perfect date" with her. It was so...Aisha, so what made her fell for her kindest and insecure roomie who didn't seem to notice her awkward flirting attempts. "I'm no high maintenance, Aisha, you know me. We can go there if you're so adamant...but I don't need a fancy restaurant if you ask me out" Amanda moved closer and pressed a tender kiss on her lips. Then she snaked her arms around her waist, swiftly finding her place into Aisha's arms as if she had always belonged there. She rested her head over her shoulder, her hair tickling her crush's neck. "I would be okay even with sandwiches or frozen pizza. All I'd need to be happy is you" "I would never forgive myself if after all these years I'll get you frozen pizza on our first date" Aisha managed to joke, despite the lump of happiness forming in her throat. "Just know that I wouldn't mind it" Amanda chuckled. When her laughter faded away and that pang of pain stroke back, she held her anchor a little tighter and hid her face in the crook of Aisha's neck. "Can we stay like this for a bit more?" "Of course, sweetheart. I'm not going anywhere" Aisha whispered, stroking her back.

[jessiewre]

Day 59

Tues 3rd Mar

🏔Moshi to Arusha 🚍

It was time for us to leave Moshi and move onto Arusha, a city 2 hours away renowned as the starting point for all the big safari parks.

I went up early for brekkie on the rooftop and this time, we had bananas but there appeared to be no coffee. I asked the woman and she confirmed it and was just like ‘Sorry, no coffee’.

As I write this, I have the overwhelming feeling that it definitely feels like the right time to step back from the blog. First, I’m telling you about there being no bananas at breakfast. Jesus. Then the next day there is no coffee. I’m thinking WOW. This is boring isn’t it. But then again, some of you may be so bored reading about Coronaviru that this is a welcome break.

Well, it did jazz up a bit and get exciting, cos I looked up and coffee had appeared. JUST LIKE THAT. Thats right! One minute it was there, then the next, Poof! Like magic! God knows how long it had been there, the woman didn’t feel the need to mention it to me despite knowing I wanted coffee. Absolute JOKE.

We spent the morning packing our bags and debating what our plan should be, while Phil huffed and puffed, flipping between angryman and stresshead. He had definitely got out on the wrong side of the bed, but as the great Irish philosopher Ronan Keating once said, Life is a rollercoaster. Well, Phil was certainly riding that rollercoaster. He was hot and cold like a broken tap I tells ya.

Despite Phil’s multiple attempts to get one, not having a SIM card was irritating him a lot, especially considering we needed to ring various people about hotels and safaris. So after a bit more grumbling, he went off like a true moody hero to try Vodacom again. I ‘minded the bags’ and did some hotel research (ie. I had a nice long chat with Evie and then spoke to Luke & Bex about house viewings).

Despite the 10am check out time (its more a suggestion than a rule right?), I sat in our hotel room with the door open to imply I was leaving ‘any minute’ and positioned a towel hung on the bed pole, perfectly hiding my face from the doorway view to ensure I avoided eye contact with any hotel workers passing by 😏.

I thought about Phil, all alone in that annoying phone shop, and felt a pang of guilty. Or was it hunger? Hard to know. But either way, I sent him some WhatsApp messages to give the impression I was doing lots of excellent research (that should Cheer him up, I thought), and crossed my fingers that the hilarious GIFS I was sending would put him in an AMAZING mood. He loves a GIF does our Phil. After the pain of sim card buying, I knew it could go either way but at least he’d only get the messages once he’d eventually got a working sim so I had a chance...

Well, I soon saw the ticks ☑️ turn that beautiful shade of blue and nervously waited for a response.

THANKFULLY I got two of the best emoji’s I could have hoped for.

🕺🏻 🕺🏻

It was then I knew that Sweetbox were right back in the 90s - Everything’s Gona be Alright.

My overstaying-my-welcome plan worked for 2 whole hours and I made it to midday sat in the hotel room before I got a polite knock on the door to ask me to vacate.

‘Ohh I didn’t realise the time, of course I’ll leave straight away’.

Phil returned and strongly declared we should go to Milan’s Indian for a quick lunch before going to get the bus. Well, the awkward thing was, I didn’t want to eat curry for lunch (not a sentence I say often)...but then again, I also really didn’t want to risk messing with Phil’s mood...

I decided to try the softly, softly approach and lightly suggested we go to the Kilimanjaro coffee lounge.

Phil jerked his face round to me angrily and the atmosphere instantly went ice cold.

‘What is WRONG with Milans?? You loved the food there and its really close by!’.

I quietly explained again that although it was a lovely place, I simply didn’t want curry for lunch, and he obviously couldn’t argue with that. Such is life. But it definitely REALLY annoyed him and he stropped out of the hostel with his bags in search of a tuc tuc.

We both stood on the corner of the street in blasting heat waiting for a tuc tuc to appear and for some reason, there were NONE. Everytime we saw one and waved it down, it would go zooming past and we would see there were already people in the back. Phil was ready to burst with annoyance but as the sun began to nearly melt our heads, I finally waved one down.

We went to put our bags in and then got a shock as we realised there was already a woman in the back!

‘No problem no problem’ declared the driver as he saw the look on our faces, and he ushered at me to put my rucksack into the back. Well, that was harder than it looked.

‘Oh for Gods sake’ Phil said under his breath, but not so much that we all didn’t hear him and I started to attempt getting my bag in.

Phil watched on in disbelief and was like ‘This is ridiculous! Where are we meant to sit??’

Phil then tried to get his bag in while I tried to sit in the front with the driver, but the driver was like ‘Nah you go in back’, then the woman was sort of holding Phil’s massive rucksack and there was not really any room for us and Phil just lost his rag completely 😂

‘Right, forget it! Take the bags out Jess! I AM NOT GETTING THIS TUC TUC!’

I had a point like.

Thankfully, a nearby boda driver had a great loud whistle and managed to hail another tuc tuc down straightaway, just before Phil spontaneously combusted, and we went to Kili coffee lounge where there were too many witnesses for Phil to maintain his grumpy face for too long. PHEW.

I enjoyed a simple cheese tomato toastie with fries (opposite of a curry I’d say) and now that he’d calmed down, Phil told me about his morning visit to the phone shop. While he was stood in the phone shop, stressing out and getting super angry and wound up by the slow process, he went to look at his phone and clicked to unlock it. To his utter shock, on the screen was an image he’d NEVER seen before, and it was one of those ‘Inspirational Quote’ memes.

It said:

If you can’t handle stress

You can’t handle success

He stood in total amazement, starring at the screen, wondering how the powers that be had managed to target him in this way, how google was so onto him. How had they known he was MEGA stressed and how had they got this image onto his phone?!?! Maybe it was a message from GOD?!

WELL after further investigation (the back button), he discovered that it was the profile picture of the phone shop guys. He’d added the guys number as part of the sim registration process, then he’d accidentally clicked on this guys whatsapp profile pic without realising, then locked his phone 😂😂😂😂😂.

Anyway, back to the cafe, it had been 30 minutes of good vibes so naturally Phil started to dip again, this time stressing about getting a bus to Arusha. After all the bus journeys we’ve ever done, I have NO IDEA why this simple 2 hour journey was getting to him so much, but hey ho sometimes these things don’t make sense do they. He’s a complicated and simple fellow in equal measures.

We put on our bags and walked to Tahmeed buses to see if by chance they had one of their nice buses passing through anytime soon, so we could avoid the super basic local buses that stop every 5 minutes. Much to Phil’s joy, they said SURE there’s one departing in about 15 minutes and that was the first time that day that Phil reeally smiled, ya know like with all his teeth and his eyes. It was beautiful.

The bus arrived about 30 minutes later (not too bad by African standards!) and we took a seat, only to realise it was actually some guys seat who had just jumped off the bus for a drink - and he just happened to have a huge machete on his belt! He seemed fine with it though and sat somewhere else! The bus guys weirdly would not allow anyone to have their windows open, instead insisting that we have the AC on. I kept opening my window a bit anyway as the AC above my head was blocked and I needed the fresh air, but the bus man was getting really annoyed. The locals wanted their windows open too but the bus man was stomping round the bus shutting them all and shouting at people, while people shouted back at him. As people coughed and sneezed 🤧 as humans tend to do, I wondered how many germs were getting regurgitated back through the system during this time of hyper virus mania... 🦠

The woman next to me fell asleep on me for most of the journey then we arrived to Arusha town. As we’d read would happen, we were completely HOUNDED on arrival by men trying to sell us safaris. One guy pretended to work for the bus company while getting my bag to hand me, I was like Dude I can get my own bag.

They were all talking at once trying to give us business cards, one guy said another guy was a liar, another accused another of being a thief, and it was just chaos and frankly, harassment - so Phil told them all to Frig the Frig off and we walked the 6 minute walk to our hotel Raha Leo Inn.

We walked through the door feeling immediate relief to be away from the hassling streets, when suddenly the door opened behind us and the guy who’d pretended to be working for the bus company walked in and started to try and sell us a safari!I was like Hey I thought you said you worked for the bus company mate, and he was like ‘Yes yes, they are my friends, but I have safari’. What the hell does that even mean haha. He even pointed to a safari vehicle parked outside and said ‘Uh, this is my vehicle’.

Uh, I don’t think it is mate 😂

But in an attempt to make him go away, I took the card from him and said Thanks, I’ll be in touch if we need to, ba bye now, ba bye.

It was too late though, Phil was FAR too annoyed by it all and he went for it.

‘You have just FOLLOWED US here and now you come INSIDE the hotel to hassle us?? I don’t want your card! I will NOT be doing a safari with you, take you card and please leave’.

Incase the guy wasn’t clear, Phil shoved the card into his hand while he said it.

The guy was rather disgruntled at all this but left the hotel looking defeated. Phil puffed his chest out a bit and gave his chest some big fist blows in a gorilla like fashion.

About 5 minutes later, I watched a completely different man drive off in the safari vehicle the guy had been referring to...

The hotel was clean and pleasant enough, although the lack of a TOILET SEAT was a little strange 😂. Also we noticed a man walk into the hotel and straight up to the social area without being stopped by the staff, and he turned out to be another safari seller. Hmm. We made a mental note to keep an eye on our valuables and not leave them out anywhere...

I was back to normal and ready to eat curry by dinner time so we went to find the the LP recommended Hot Plate restaurant. Directly opposite it was a stall of crazy shirts and we couldn’t resist a quick look before we headed inside, immediately finding a sweet shirt that we had to buy for 20k tsh (about £6.50). The young lads running the stall were buzzing, though why there needed to be 4 of them working I’ll never know. Thats like 1 guy for every 2 shirts available. We did the crazy handshake to celebrate the purchase which they really lolled at.

Obviously then I washed my hands - while singing the chorus of 21 seconds by So Solid Crew.

Our dinner was soooo good - maybe the best masala fries so far, a delicious dosa, and loads of other lovely food - and we went to find a tuc tuc to get back, eventually finding one at the petrol station, and took our huge doggy bag of food with us.

On return, we found out one of the hotel staff had her phone taken that very day! We told them they really needed to invest in a lock on the front door so only staff and guests could enter. They agreed with us and so will probably do absolutely nothing about it.

After spending almost 11 hours of his time searching, Phil FINALLY found the official marathon snaps of himself and was (understandably of course) very excited to see them, so we had a good look through those for about an hour (there were 10 photos after all) before finally getting back to The Crown.

3rd

[just-some-random-blogger]

Runaway | 2

BTS Mafia!Kim Seokjin (Jin) x Reader + other parings ? | Part 1 2 3 4? Characters: Kim Namjoon, Kim Seokjin, Kim Taehyung, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, (+ other BTS members in fufure) Summary: Jin was the mononym for the notorious mafia leader who owned one of the biggest corporations in the city. But what happens when the big, bad kingpin comes face to face with his missing first love after five years, in a manner that just screamed “star crossed lovers”? Will he ever find out why she turned her back on him and became a runaway? Word Count: 1k+ Warnings: Nothing really, besides a slightly big headed superior lol

Preview

A/N: I ADDED JIN!!!!! but there isnt interaction yet so 

hehe

"Thank you so much for doing this today... again. I promise I'll-" ”Stop. I told you I don't mind, and really, I don't." Namjoon cut me off from the other end of the line. With my phone by my ear, I raised my available hand and called an incoming taxi.

"It's just, I told you to wait until the-" "I swear, if you apologize one more time, I will storm to your new office and get you fired on your first day."

I chuckled and ran into the cab, feeling butterflies swirl in my stomach as the words Namjoon fluttered in my minde. "New office," I repeated.

"That's right," his smugness was audible, "Don’t worry everything’s--” there was a crashing sound. I heard a few muffled sounds, along with some shouts.

When the car started moving, it took a lot for me not to tell the driver to pull over so I could run back home. 

“Namjoon?!” I called in panic.

There was a painfully prolonged silence.

A growl answered not soon enough, “Sorry, Kkul is being a handful today.” And as if protest, my dog’s barking pierced through.

I groaned in relief. I gave myself a moment and pulled my phone away as an airy chuckle left my lips. I sighed, “Namjoon, are you sure you can-” “Ya! I can handle anything, okay? There was just a small hiccup. Kkul snuck her way through a bag of treats, s’all. It’s been dealt with. Now go and get paid unless you wanna hear another sermon."

I smiled though he couldn’t see, "Okay, mama Joonie."

"Fighting!" he spoke lastly and hung up. With one final chuckle, I turned to the driver and gave a soft smile, “Pearl tower please."

I forgot how hectic traffic was but also how much easier it is to just exit your ride in front of the place you're going to.

Thankfully, I was much earlier this morning and arrived well before 8:15, my call time. Why there was an extra fifteen minutes was a mystery, but I guessed it was for allowance or something. Regardless, I got here when my watch read 7:30.

I went up to the twenty-fifth floor and was greeted by front desk. 

I greeted back, "Good morning, I'm the new secretary. I was told to report here."

"Ah, secretary?" 

I nodded. 

"You're early. You’ve been assigned to someone who always arrives on the dot, so you can take it either way. Please make yourself comfortable while you wait. He'll be here in fourty."

I gave her a smile and did as she said.

“Get your damn feet off the dashboard, Taehyung.” I growled at the man wearing a bright violet, satin shirt along with gold embroidered black pants. He silently pulled off his combat boots down, crossing his legs, adjusting his seat belt.

“You want one?” he then offered, as he pushed his golden tainted sunglasses up like a headband, before opening a pack of bubble gum.

“I don’t want my teeth to rot.” I quipped, over taking a moron in a Honda in front of me.

I honked just as I passed him, nodding my head in disapproval.

“Chillax, hyung.” he spoke, against the sound of chewing. “It’s not like you’ll be fired if you’re late.”

I gripped the steering wheel, “Do you want to walk there?” I then gave him a dirty look, “Because that’s how you walk there.”

At this point, the man raised his brows and looked away, not forgetting to blow a bubble as he did.

“I swear, you’re lucky you’re valuable, Taehyung, or else I would’ve thrown your body down a dump.”

He chuckled and gave a wide, boxy smile. “Ya! Jin hyung! Coming from you, that’s a real compliment.

The ding of the elevator alerted me. I putting the phone I was busy checking posts online on, I stood up and heard the receptionist get greeted. Just then, two men in stormed off in heavy discussion, completely ignoring me.

“Yaaa,” the woman across me whisper-yelled, “ka!”

And go I did.

I was quick to follow them, feeling slightly uneasy by the fact I was technically doing so unknown. Just then, one of the two men turned around. I assume he was mister Min, my superior, considering the fact he gave me a nod in regard.

I quickly nodded back, along with a polite smile. He turned back to the man next to him immediately after.

The two seemed wrapped up in quite the conversation and it was evident that they had high positions with all the confidence and single-mindedness that swirled around them. We quickly tread past office cubicles, and hallways, getting greeted by ever single person they passed, until eventually, we wound up in a large office, which I hesitantly entered in fear I shouldn't be too near them. I did enter though and found the room had huge floor to ceiling windows that showcased the busy streets down below.

"All I'm saying is that you should've sped up the process up." the other raised his hands and sat on the side of the desk whereas the one I assumed was Mr. Min, sat on the chair behind the desk.

"Listen, I was hired because of my wit in making tactical decisions, and yes, a delay will crucially push us into a do or die situation, but trust me, I did the right thing. No one will regret it."

The man chuckled, "You're that confident?"

Mr. Min propped his elbows on the surface before him. "I am."

He gave a deep chuckle, “Alright then. Make sure no one gets disappointed."

Suddenly, the entire focus in the room shifted, and all eyes were on me. 

"Yes?" the one sat on the desk quirked a brow. 

I gave a small smile, "Good morning, sir. I’m Mr. Min's new secretary."

Mr. Min cocked his head to the side, and the other gave a chuckle. He pat the back of the man on the chair, "Wow, Yoongi hyung, you're even lucky with secretaries."

"Have we met?" Mr. Min asked, disregarding the previous comment.

I turned to my feet and chuckled, "We have, actually. Yesterday, I... bumped into you and, well, your papers flew all over the place."

A small smirk rose on his lips. He proceeded to nod, seemingly recalling the incident, "Right, you were wearing a red dress and kept apologizing."

"Red dress, huh?" the other mumbled, side eyeing the other.

Mr. Min pat the man’s back, indicating he wanted him to move. The man did just so as Mr Min continued, "Didn’t you you fix some of my papers?" 

I nodded slowly. 

He gave a slightly bigger smile, "I was impressed how much you sorted out in such a small span of time. You saved me from a lot of unnecessary work. I was actually considering looking into you so I could get you as my secretary." Mr. Min turned to the man who had crossed his arms and smirked, "I guess you're right about my luck and secretaries."

"Ya, I'm always right."

"But not about the speeding up process."

He snickered but ignored that, then walked over to me. "Chairman Jung." he smiled softly, extending a hand. Now that he was up-close and center, I realize that he had a killer smile. I instinctively gave a firm handshake. His hand was large and calloused.

We pulled away.

"If he gets too unbearable, let me know and you can be my secretary instead." he winked and chuckled. Alright, now he’s biting up for than he can chew. 

I forced out a chuckle upon hearing his words. "I'm sure there won't be any need, Chairman Jung. Mr. Min seems to be a person of great character."

Mr. Min held back a laugh, but I could see the satisfaction in his face as cleared his throat. He then beckoned me to him. I gave Chairman Jung a nod in regard and walked away.

"Don't let the door hit you on your way out.” Mr. Min called before 

"I won't." he replied looking over his shoulder with a smirk, raising a hand before he left.

"Take a seat." Mr. Min motioned as he shuffled his papers. "I see that you're far more impressive than you already let on."

I gave a small smile, "I've learned a lot in the past twenty-four years."

"Speaking of which, I don't actually know if I should be impressed or scared by how many jobs you've done at your age." he said while taking in the pages of my resumé.

"I did a lot of travelling before, so I had to leave and get a lot of different jobs to sustain myself along the way."

He hummed, "You travel a lot it seems. I recognize this hotel," he pointed, "and this diner," he flipped the page, "are in different cities. And isn’t this one in Hong Kong? You only had those jobs for a month." he turned to me with serious eyes.

I breathed in. The sunlight from the window, was absorbed by his hair and made his skin glow. I couldn’t help but smile at him. I played it off though as I explained "I... went through a spontaneous faze. I'm ready to settle down and have a stable job now."

Mr. Min nodded. He then pushed the papers aside, and propped both elbows on the surface before him. "You don't have a haunting past, do you?"

I raised my brows and peeped out a 'what'.

"You don't have a criminal record or psychotic relatives?"

I opened my mouth and nodded harshly in disagreement, "No, sir. I don't."

He nodded and leaned back, "Good Let me give you your first task then."

[flyingangelofblueislands]

Baby

ASTRO Rocky (Park Minhyuk)

Bias X Reader

Genre: Fluff

You called ASTRO’s manager as you approached the back entrance of his company building. Nervous at the amount of fans sprinkled near the entrance, you opted to go around back for privacy’s sake. There wasn’t much opposition or concern to your relationship after going public, much to your surprise. But you also knew the fan’s hearts and didn’t like to necessarily “rub it in their faces” so to speak. So you made sure to keep the meeting aspect of your relationship as private as possible, being a private person, Minhyuk was relieved you wanted to do the same, he easily obliged when you brought it up and his company was all the more lenient towards your relationship because of your mature stance for the sake of his career. Their personal manager answered the phone after a few short rings, “Y/N? Where are you? There’s so many people out here.” “Yes. I know. That’s why I’m at the back entrance. I thought it’d be better…” “Ah, okay. Wait there. I’m coming around.” “Okay.” You hung up after the manager and waited around near the back side of the building without loitering too close to alert security before you could have someone come vouch for your presence. You played on your phone for quite some time before you heard the glass doors opening and your name being cautiously called out. It was your boyfriend’s voice. Your head shot up and looked over to your left where Minhyuk’s smiling face was waving you inside. You quickly moved and entered the building. As soon as the door closed behind you, Minhyuk wrapped his arms around you from behind. You felt your insides jump at his embrace and he took a deep inhale as he said, “Hi.” “Hi.” You giggled back. You then said good afternoon to the manager standing slightly off to the side and he greeted you back relieved and smiling, “Now he,” The manager gestured to Minhyuk with a smile on his face, “can stop bothering me about where you are.” You held a smile and turned your head to face Minhyuk. “Is that true?” You playfully nudged him. He looked away shyly trying not to smile and released you from the hug as he raked a hand through his hair. “Well, I was just…wondering where you were. You said you’d be here around 4…” The manager began to lead you both back upstairs as you linked arms with your boyfriend in efforts to appeal to him to not be annoyed. Even though you knew he was just playing hard to get. As usual. He put his hands in his pockets with you still holding onto his arm. “Sorry~ I ended up having to help my friend with her studies longer than I thought. It’s only 6 anyway. It’s still early.” “Not early enough. You have to be home by 10.” “Are you going to walk me today?” You looked over and up at him as he took his hand out of his pocket to lace fingers with you as you entered the elevator. He met your eyes briefly before straightening his gaze back in front of him towards the closing doors. Lowering his voice he whispered, “We’ll see.” You rolled your eyes and smiled. You had to figure out how to sneak out the manager’s sight in order for it to happen, but he’d managed to do so many times before with help from the members. “We’ll see then.” You responded. Once in the practice room, Minhyuk sat on the floor next to where you had seated yourself comfortably and stretched both of his legs out in front of him. Then he stretched his arms towards you, dangling them mid-air. “Pull.” He said. “What?” You asked as he has interrupted your thoughts even though you had been looking straight at him. “You didn’t hear a word I said? I asked if you would help me stretch?” He looked at you quizzically and smirking. “What are you thinking about?” “Huh? Oh. Nothing.” “Just staring?” Minhyuk teased as you finally positioned yourself to be able to grab his hands and yank him forward in response. Surprised, he launched forward, legs bending in the process, and slid face to face with you. You baulked at the sudden proximity and pushed his face back with two fingers to his forehead. “What are you doing?” Minhyuk sprung back upright from your slight shove. His thick eyebrows dipping into the center of his face as he grinned at you. “I get to choreograph another song. Look at it and tell me what you think so far?” You nodded and moved yourself to face the working area of the practice room. The lights were illuminating almost every square inch of the paneled walls and bright wood floor you had come to think of as a second homeroom as many times as you were meeting in there, spending hours viewing and reviewing with him. You almost knew all their dances by heart. Plus a few girl dances you just really wanted him to do as well. His manager sat off in the corner on his two phones doing only he knew what and Minhyuk bounded off over to the control panels and plugged up his phone. As the music started to blare from the speakers lining the walls, your body jumped a bit being startled and you let out a small laugh. Minhyuk saw your actions and laughed while mouthing ‘sorry’. “Okay!” He yelled over the music, “This is what I have so far.” He proceeded to do the bits of choreography he had already prepared. It covered all of the first verse and as the song reached the hook, he began with a cute front step and finger heart that popped out from behind his back after a detailed half spin and some quick footwork to the side. You blinked rapidly at how fast he did the last few moves and a smile spread on your face simultaneously. He paused his movements as it was the end of how far he had gotten and you made a few exclamations of praise and he jogged over towards the music and paused it. He checked his reflection slightly in the mirror and fixed his hair as he talked to you, his breath a bit staggered from the choreography. “When I do that move I think of you.” Minhyuk pantomimed the last move. “Only when you do that move?” You teased trying to cover your shy feelings. His toothy smile bloomed and he half stopped his dancing and slid towards you. “You know what I mean.” You closed your eyes and shook your head. “I don’t think I do.” Minhyuk took you shaking head in both hands and held you still. Leaning into your ear, he then whispered, “I couldn’t stop thinking about you even if I tried.” He released your head at the same time as his sentence ended and backed up. Jogging backwards he went back over to turn on some music. “What do you wanna hear?” “Uhh~~How about P.O.P, Catch You—or Romeo, Without You? Oh! Or Map6, I’m Ready?” “Oh oh~ I don’t know their dances. I’ll play the girl one. You like girl groups more, right?” He eyed you playfully hinting at jealousy. You nodded and smiled. “Okay. P.O.P it is…” “Freestyle please?” You pulled a feigned tired facial expression. “It will cheer me up, I’ve been so stressed. Or I can teach you the dance?” Your face immediately abandoned its former gloom at the aspect of teaching your boyfriend yet another girl group dance. Minhyuk grabbed at his own head in semi-defeat. He queued the song and skipped back over to you. Leaning down, he kissed your forehead quickly and backed up pointing at you while narrowing his eyes, “Only because it’s you.”

The next hour flew by with you helping Minhyuk with his choreography and he taking mini music requests from you in intervals to keep you somewhat entertained. His manager coughed in the corner when you both got a bit too excited and distracted and that would snap you both back to reality mid laughing fits or mild play wrestling or spontaneous poke/tickle attacks. Around 8:30pm, Minhyuk suddenly took your wrist and pulled you towards him, then quietly told you to pack your things. You moved towards your things and, as quickly as possible without being non-discreet, did just that. You knew what he was trying to do. On rehearsal nights, like clockwork, at 8:45pm, the manager stepped out of the building to smoke a cigarette, secretly eat his dinner (usually something the boys weren’t allowed to have), and call his fiancée. Leaving the younger, more easily swayed manager in charge. The manager would then come back right at 9:00pm. You and Minhyuk had approximately 15 minutes to get out of the building and it had to be undetected. He pocketed his cell phone after texting MJ who was down in the office area to help him come up with an alibi. MJ responded saying that he would head to the vocal rooms and lock the door from the inside and say Minhyuk was in there with him but he’d better not take all night like last time. At 8:43pm, you and Minhyuk sat in two chairs on the side of the room, keeping a watchful eye on his manager. The manager had begun to fidget around, looking for menus and his personal cell phone. He told the other manager he’d be right back and left the room two minutes later. Minhyuk suddenly rushed towards your bags and put them on his own body before leading you out of the room after telling the younger manager he was walking you to the door and then heading to the vocal practice rooms to meet up with MJ. The sun was setting pretty late as it was summer, and you got the feeling of wanting to witness it once more with Minhyuk. “Why don’t we go to the roof top and watch the sunset?” “Oh, that’s a good idea.” Minhyuk smiled and nodded. When you two got to the rooftop, you moved towards the railing with Minhyuk hot on your tail. “Be careful!” He warned with quiet concern. You rolled your eyes delightfully. “Okay, Mom.” You retorted at his overly parental tone. Minhyuk came around to your side and you both stared up at the blue sky melting into the fluffy orange and pink glowing clouds. You stood a few inches apart from each other but you could feel the side closest to him tingling with warmth. Minhyuk put his hands in his pockets and exhaled. He suddenly looked so stressed in the silence. So preoccupied with thoughts. You felt a breeze brush past you and it carried the scent of his cologne. The smell attracted you like a magnet and lead you to lean against his arm. After a small bit of silence, you spoke again, “How often do you get to watch the sunset?” “Not often—when we’re preparing for a comeback or during promotions. Maybe catch some on the way to a fan meet farther out or on our way back home. That’s it really.” “I look at them every day. If I’m inside, I come out and I look at them on purpose.” You responded quietly. “Really? Why?” Minhyuk turned his head down towards you. “I just really like them. It’s the one point in the day where things feel so peaceful. I get relaxed just watching the day turn into night.” “Wow. I never saw them that way before. I just thought they were pretty.” He tucked a hand under your chin. “Just like my baby.” You smiled a bit and shook your head. Straightening up so you could look at him. You opened and closed your mouth a couple times before finding the courage to try and tell him an idea you’d thought of before but didn’t have the right timing to say. “You should make more effort to see the sunset when we’re not together.” You started quietly. It made Minhyuk turn to face you, intrigued with your suddenly very serious tone.  “And when you’re looking at it, know that I’m looking at it too and thinking of you. Maybe you can find some peace or some strength in that. If anything. I know I can’t help you in a lot of ways. But I’d like to be someone you can think of and know that there is someone that is always on your side.” You looked back up at the sky briefly to keep your thoughts on track. “I…” You wanted to tell him you loved him. But you couldn’t will your tongue to unfurl with the words. So you just swallowed them, and hoped Minhyuk wouldn’t press the issue of your abandoned sentence. He just beamed down at you before looking back at the suddenly drifting violet and indigo sky. “Alright. I will.” He agreed softly. “Come on. It’s getting late. Let’s get you home.”

Once you two had made it down to the main level of the building, Minhyuk told you to wait for him, while he scouted a couple exits for wandering fans. When he didn’t see any face he recognized, he waved you to come over to the side entrance. You two slipped out and began your journey home. You stopped at a nearby convenience store and got your favorite ice creams. “You want a bite of mine?” He asked you, holding his ice cream towards you. You smiled, knowingly. “You just want some of mine! No!” You teased and moved away from him. He leaned forward smiling as you both made your way down the street. “Just one bite.” He leaned towards your ice cream with an expecting mouth. In response, you smooshed it lightly into his lips. He bounced back in surprise and you couldn’t help but laugh. “There’s your one mouth full!”  He chuckled and backed up a bit before you grabbed him by the hand. Lacing fingers with him you motioned for him to come towards you a little bit. He stepped closer once again and you were letting out residual laughter. With the napkin that was wrapped around your cold ice cream to protect your hands from its frozen state, you reached up to wipe his mouth clean. His eyes probed into yours as you did so and you felt your face heat in second-hand embarrassment of his intense staring. “Stop. What’s wrong with you?” You jokingly asked as you moved away from his stare and began starting on your journey home once again. He jogged lightly to keep up with you and took your hand once more. You finally made it to your apartment complex, and could hear your neighbors on their balconies shouting on their phones and wondered if your mom was one of them. She was always shouting at people from her office around this hour about deadlines. As you relayed that to Minhyuk he simply said, “Well you’d better hurry up and go upstairs. You don’t wanna be on her bad side.” “You trying to get rid of me?” You playfully squinted at him in play suspicion. He smiled and shook his head, “I would keep you all to myself forever if I could. You know that right?” “Right.” You nodded assuredly. He nodded back and shot you another smile, “Okay. Go inside and rest. I have to go back to practice…Will you dream about me?” “Maybe~” As you moved to enter the building after you both said your goodnights, he suddenly swept you up into a tight hug. Surprised, you laughed out loud, but then you wrapped your arms around his torso and squeezed him back. His hug was usually a tight one, but this one felt extra meaningful. You thought to yourself that he must have appreciated your rooftop words after all. With his head still resting on your shoulder next to your ear, not bothering to let you go, Minhyuk finally said, “Thank you, Y/N. I love you.”

*****************************************************************************************

Hello there my Marshmallows and all you passers-by! That was 2.6k of fluff for you all simply because I wanted to give you a sweet tooth for this precious baby nougat that is Rocky aka Minhyuk. We all know he is charismatic in dance and rap and wants us to fall into his “Rocky Swag”; but he sings so well too and is a often showing us that he is also a little puppy-bunny. lol. Like ASTRO is what fluff dreams are made of honestly and they are so pure so I had fun writing this and thinking of how this might make some of you guys smile!

love, peace, and quick fluff reads! ~Fluffintine

[theripertoire]

What I Packed in my Hospital Bag

As many of you may already know, I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy this past November. As soon as my eighth month began, I started feeling a lot of cramps and pressure, and was so sure I would pop at any minute. It also didn’t help that I had been onsite every other day, overseeing the works on our apartment to move in on time for baby. Since I had been planning on a natural birth, I wanted to be prepared in case of any surprises. I sought advice from both Google and helpful moms (both followers and friends), and packed my first ever hospital bag according to that. Being a first-time mom comes with its handful of mistakes, and a whole lot of over packing - not to mention all the things you neglected to pack because you thought you would never need them. Lesson learned. I shared the entire process of my hospital bag packing and promised a blog post to follow, but I didn’t do that till now (and I’m glad I waited till after I delivered because much of it changed). So, because so many of you asked me to write this post, and because a lot of my FTM (first time mom) friends ask me for my list, I decided to finally post it online once and for all in the hopes that it will be helpful to some of you.

Disclaimer: This post is based solely on my personal experience, needs and lifestyle. Please do include or remove items in your bag according to what you find necessary. It is also best to contact your hospital’s maternity ward for tips and advice. The nurses and midwives have tons of expertise and will tell you exactly what you need to bring with you.

That being said, here are some tips as well as my full list:

First tip: Do pack your hospital bag ahead of time. I encourage packing while in your eighth month. I often hear stories of women who go into spontaneous labor way ahead of their due date. As a result, they end up in the hospital without even the bare essentials like pajamas for both baby and mama. So, better early and prepared than late and unpacked.

Second tip: Purchase a new suitcase, slightly bigger than a carry on with two separate compartments: one for your things, and one for baby’s items. The more organized you are while packing, the easier it will be during your stay at the hospital. Click here to see the hospital bag that I purchased. I found it to be perfect, size versus cost versus quality.

Third tip: Pack each of baby’s outfits in a Ziploc bag (bonnet, mittens, pajamas and socks). That way, when baby needs to be changed, all the nurse has to do is take one of the Ziploc bags where everything is already coordinated and ready. Dirty clothes will go into the then empty Ziploc bag to avoid dirtying other items in the closet or suitcase. Once home, those bags will go straight to the laundry. These bags (or similar ones) can be found at any major supermarket.

Fourth tip: Regardless of the season, it’s preferable to buy and pack cotton pajamas versus velour. In summer, you can dress down baby by adding a short sleeved bodysuit underneath, no socks and no bonnet. Inversely, you can add layers in winter with a long sleeved bodysuit, socks, a bonnet and mittens (when needed). Go thicker or lighter on the blanket depending on the room temperature. From experience, it’s better for baby to feel cool than too warm. Cotton is also the most comfortable fabric for baby to wear.

Fifth tip: If budget and space permit, pack your bag as though you’re going in for a planned C section (a four-day stay instead of two). Sometimes, both natural births and inductions don’t go as planned, and one is forced to undergo a C section – which, by the way, is not the end of the world. In my case, we started off with induced labor because my cervix was closed. It also wasn’t effaced. My water eventually broke and still, nothing. Three hours into the induction, we decided it made more sense to switch to a C section. (When your cervix isn’t dilated, induced labor can last for over a day with a 40% chance of it actually working. This is too much time and pain that is unnecessary for both mom and baby.) This is a matter of personal opinion and preference. Your decision should always be discussed with your doctor, who is the only person qualified to advise you on what route to take. And even then, the decision remains entirely in your hands. This is a very personal choice and you shouldn’t be manipulated into making a decision you’re not convinced with, regardless of what your doctor and society think. Follow your gut and logic. In my case, and despite planning on and wanting a natural birth, I opted for a C section and didn’t regret my decision for a single minute. Within 12 hours, I was walking and eating. I was able to nurse my baby two hours post-op, and I recovered so well physically, I forgot I even had stitches. But then again, this doesn’t apply to everyone.

Sixth tip: I know I will be attacked by breastfeeding groups for saying this, but do take formula with you. It could be for whatever reason: you decide not to breastfeed, your milk supply doesn’t come in or you simply want to supplement from the very beginning. Personally, I’m pro breastfeeding and believe that it’s the most beneficial for your baby. I even breastfed for more than 15 hours per day for the first couple of weeks. It requires a lot of dedication and is quite the challenge, but it’s very rewarding for both mom and baby. But, I’m also a firm believer that “fed is best”, and I’m someone whose milk supply was excellent and really enjoyed breastfeeding my baby for a month. I’m aware that newborns lose up to 10% of their birth weight in their first week outside the womb, but I refused to keep my baby hungry while waiting for my milk supply to come in. I’m not an expert but I’m the mother, and I don’t care what anyone says. The nurses fought me on this, but I put my foot down and insisted. I refused to hear my baby cry from hunger and refused to watch him lose more than a certain amount of weight. I also wanted my baby to get used to my breast, breast milk, formula and feeding bottles from the beginning. The nurses at the hospital where I gave birth insisted on feeding him formula from a cup instead of bottle, once a night, to avoid nipple confusion. This worked great. I later on breastfed throughout the day and gave him formula once per night with the Munchkin Latch bottle, which resembles the natural flow of breast milk and feels similar to the breast as well. This increased each week till I switched completely to formula. Once again, this is my personal preference. I must have done something right, since my baby went from 25th percentile to 90th percentile in just 7 weeks postpartum. I gave my baby colostrum and breast milk for as long as I was able to, and once I had to suddenly stop breastfeeding, we didn’t face difficulties like accepting the taste of formula or feeding from the bottle because I had gotten him used to it from the start. He also sleeps very well since day one because he is well fed and happy. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad for whatever decision you make. Remember, it’s none of their business.

What to pack in your hospital bag.

This list is based on the items that I actually needed and found to be essential or useful during my stay at the hospital.  

One to two changes of clothes for baby for each day you are in the hospital (bodysuit, cotton pajamas, mittens {unless built in pajama}, socks). Put each set in a Ziploc bag so the full outfit is ready for the nurse/midwife to change/dress baby.

Weather appropriate outfit for going home (for both you and baby)

One pajama for you for each day you are in the hospital, including socks, nursing bra, postpartum panties, slippers

Breast pads (The Avent night pads worked very well with me. I preferred them to the day pads, which I found to be a waste, since they don’t absorb as well. I wore the night pads even during the daytime)

Maternity pads (Natracare or Relax are two good options. Most hospitals in Lebanon have the latter available already)

Marcalan nipple cream – if you’re planning on breastfeeding

Two thin swaddle blankets

Two thick blankets (if it’s winter) or two thin blankets (if it’s summer)

Toiletries, makeup, hairdryer, etc.

Phone chargers, camera, etc.

Hair ties (always have your hair tied when in close contact with baby)

Formula, in case your milk doesn’t come in on time or in case you wish to supplement (if this is something you’re convinced about, you should insist on it, since some hospitals don't agree to give formula. Also take the feeding bottle brand you have bought for your baby with you. I recommend Munchkin Latch in parallel with breastfeeding; whether it’s for expressed milk or formula. It is excellent)

One pack of diapers per baby (in case you’re having twins, you will obviously need more)

Baby wipes (incase you want to change your baby in room)

Nappy rash cream (like Sudocrem and Mustela 1 2 3)

Organic almond oil for babies (baby’s skin will be very dry. Insist that they massage it on after bathing)

Nursing pillow (if you plan on breastfeeding)

Car seat (to be installed in car prior to delivery) – I recommend the Cybex, Maxi Cosi or Doona.

Once again, whether it’s your birth plan, hospital bag, method of delivery, or anything related, it should all be based on your personal preference and lifestyle, according to what’s best for you and your baby.

I want to send out so much love to all the moms-to-be out there. You are about to embark on the most challenging yet magical journey of your life. Enjoy every minute of it, no matter how difficult it may all seem at first. And remember this: it really does get better with each passing day. Don’t forget to thank yourself and your body for all the changes you’ve gone through in such a short amount of time. Even when you think you aren’t, you are in fact doing a great job.

Is there anything I’m forgetting? Got any tips for packing your hospital bag? Please share your thoughts with other mamas in the comments section below!

XX

-R

[sophiaelizabethphotography]

Aria, this is your birth story.

 Aria! Everything about you has changed my life. Your birth story is another miracle that will always point to God’s never- ending -never going to run out- love for us.

 You’re due date….

Your Daddy and I were so excited when March rolled around because we knew it marked the countdown to you finally being in our arms. We could not wait! Your due date was assumed to be around March 8th. Some of our friends had told us throughout my pregnancy with you; first babies seldom come around the due date and are usually late. So for Mommy, I knew that this day was a marker and that there were no more than two weeks before I got to see your sweet face. I was willing to wait for you to be born when you were ready, and wasn’t concerned with a late birth because I had read so many amazing stories of women who birthed healthy beautiful babies who were late. I exercised more and stayed as calm as possible. I went on walks with Daddy, friends & even alone to help encourage the process of your birth to come. My favorite place to walk was down the boardwalk of Mission Beach – being near the ocean reminded me to trust God with you and with your birth.

 One week past….

At my 41 week doctor’s appointment, my midwife said that she would need to schedule me for an induction if labor did not start by week 42. Your heart was strong and 100% healthy from all of the testing that they did. She still voiced concern & she scheduled an induction for the following Monday night at 10 pm. I went home feeling a little discouraged, and feeling like we needed to do everything we could to get you on your way. Our sweet friends Brent & Lizbeth helped us by performing acupuncture on me twice that week and also encouraging me to go unplugged for the rest of the week. So I turned over my phone to Daddy and spent time doing things that made me feel relaxed. I spent time soaking in the sweet moments that I could feel you hiccup and move inside my belly. But I still couldn’t shake the stress.

God really spoke to Mommy during that week – I was reminded of the story of Jesus & the storm. The story is about how Jesus and his disciples were on a boat crossing the sea & all of a sudden there is a chaotic storm. The disciples were so afraid they thought they were going to be overtaken by the storm, so they ran to find Jesus. When they found him he was sleeping serenely in the boat as the storm raged on. As they woke him in their panic he didn’t become frustrated or shocked by their fear. He simply got up and called out to the storm “Be Still”. And suddenly the waves calmed. I felt like all of the waiting and everyone’s loving but weighty opinions and concerns were sweeping me up into a storm of anxiety and unrest. What I really needed was for Jesus to come and calm the storm in my heart and around me. I needed him now more than ever. As I focused all that week on the truth that he was able to calm any storm I face. Stress started to fade away.

 That weekend…

On Sunday, Daddy and I headed to the beach to walk and I was so happy as we did.  The worry and stress that I had felt wasn’t even present and I enjoyed some alone time with Daddy. We knew that you would be born this week no matter what. And we were so excited. I was exactly 42 weeks when your labor started – it was Monday March 21st at 12:03 am.

 Labor….

When we timed the contractions and realized that they were the real thing-I got so excited! I knew that I should try and sleep so I did. I woke up each time a contraction would come and Daddy, who’s a light sleeper, would wake up with me, rub my back and then we’d fall back asleep.

 It was morning time when Daddy text Kashema, Gramma and Auntie Jacque. Kashema came over and helped Daddy & me as I labored all day at home. We played the play lists I had made for your birth and as the songs played, I danced and sang in between (and sometimes through) contractions. Kashema helped me sway and move my body so that your labor would go as smoothly as possible. She showed Daddy the best technique to help encourage the contractions to come.

That night Brent and Lizbeth came over to help move things along with some more acupuncture—I could feel the contractions intensifying. During one of my contractions, Lizbeth held my hand and spoke words of peace over me. She told me to embrace the contraction—and to breathe through it, to be aware of my body trying to tense and instead relax. I tried my best and as I did instead of the electric shock I felt pulsing through my body it felt instead like a warm wave rushing over me.  As night came I tried my hardest to sleep and ended up falling asleep on my big birthing ball in between contractions. I felt the most relief when I was cradled over the ball or pillows.

 The next day….

Tuesday March 22nd came so we called the hospital because it had been 24 hours of labor and we wanted to know how you were doing. They told us to come on in so Daddy loaded up everything we needed into our car and drove us up the street to the hospital. He was very careful and drove very considerately, holding my hand through contractions on the way there. When we got to the hospital, a nice woman offered to push me upstairs in a wheelchair. I was happy to receive the help, but had to stand up each time a contraction would come. We finally made it upstairs and Daddy met me where the check-in was. Once we were situated in our room, we got to hear your heartbeat and you were doing just perfectly. The midwife came in to tell us about your heartbeat and to check my cervix to see how far along we were in dilation. As she checked, I felt a swoosh come out like I had just pee’d myself. That meant that my water broke.

The nurse looked up in surprise – we all were a little surprised she said that it was a “spontaneous rupture that sometimes happens when they check.” We kind of knew that it was something she did to try and induce me and speed your labor along. Nonetheless, we were all hopeful and excited that we would get to meet you soon. I looked at the clock it was around 6 pm, and told you (inside my mind) that we could do this. I was certain that you would be in my arms by the next morning.

 In the hospital.….

Once my water broke, they required that we be admitted to the hospital. Daddy and I were very thankful that we prepared everything we needed in the event that we needed to stay. We packed so much stuff! Haha, but in the end we were thankful that we had so much with us.

Kashema and Daddy went to work making the hospital room feel more like home—(see Mommy doesn’t like hospitals and I knew that it would be hard for me to relax while we were there.) By the time Kashema and Daddy were done, music was playing, it was dim, the atmosphere was calm and I started to relax and let myself fall into the rhythm of labor.

I could feel you moving down more on my pelvis as the contractions were growing more and more intense. Daddy and Kashema helped me move my body in good motions to keep me relaxed ride the waves of the contractions. Most of the time it felt really good for me to drop my body into low squat position when I would feel the rush coming on so they tied a rebozo scarf in a knot and closed the bathroom door so that I could hold on and drop all my weight into a squat when I got swept up in the contractions.

After a while, I got a little stir crazy being in the same room so we decided to go for a walk. We walked the hall of the labor and delivery while and would stop to sway or move through the contractions. While we walked Grandpa Tim & Grandma Shirley ran into us as they checked in – I couldn’t really talk to them and vaguely remember saying something to them. At one point as we were walking I heard another mama asking for pain medication really loudly. I tried to tune her out as best as I could – reminding myself that even though I wasn’t in control of the process of labor –I could rest assured in the one who was & like Jesus on the boat that rocked to and fro, could be so unafraid that I could REST in the middle of it.

 As time went on I began to zone out and I loved having the music play non-stop, though I had finally reached the point of not being able to really sing a long. I have such beautiful vivid memories of Kashema and Daddy singing along to the worship songs that played over me. When I think back – this was my favorite part of laboring. I remember swaying and leaning my weight on Kashema's shoulders through contractions and hearing the song "No longer slaves" play. A line in the song grabbed me as I heard it playing "From my mother's womb, you have chosen me - Love has called my name." These words resonated so deeply within me as I labored and I felt like I could just soak in the contractions knowing that it meant that my body knew it was destined to birth you. God's presence was so evident to me, I smiled coming through the contraction and was filled with so much joy.

Time seemed to be frozen (but I knew it was passing quickly.) It was now night time and everyone was so exhausted. Daddy and Kash tried sleeping when they could; they had been up with me for going on three days. In the middle of the night I tried sleeping though the contractions and would be woken up by them so quickly that it seemed like I wasn’t able to sleep at all. Daddy and Kashema took turns holding my hand and reassuring me. I definitely felt the weakest at this point. I remember crying to them to not leave me alone—and Kash gently telling me “Sophia, I need only 10 minutes of sleep, I promise I’m right here – you are not alone.”

 That night….

The midwife came in and wanted to check on my status. Since being checked into the hospital there already had been a shift change in midwives. Both checked my cervix and I had asked for them to disclose how far dilated I was to Daddy and Kash. The one who was with me during the night was at first very supportive and as time kept on (as her shift was about to end) she said that she thought that we needed to try adding pitocin to the equation to help my labor along. I had read so many things about pitocin – (a drug that mimics oxytocin, the hormone naturally released through contractions during labor.) I knew already that I didn’t want it but in the middle of the night I did not have the strength or patience to tell her “No.”  I remember lying in bed on my side after she had checked me, drowsily moving through contractions as I was holding her hand, falling asleep between them, being face to face with her when I woke up and her asking me if they could give me pitocin. When I didn’t respond she didn’t go away like I had hoped she would, instead she kept asking me and at one point I saw clear frustration on her face. It felt like she was being so impatient and I just couldn’t understand why. My baby’s heartbeat was strong. She was in no distress. I was moving through my contractions and I had only been stalled in my dilation for a few hours at this point. Still she stressed that I needed to decide and that she wouldn’t be able to help me soon because her shift was ending. Kash kicked Daddy who was asleep at the foot of the bed so that he could move the nurse out from being in the front of my face. When she finally left Kashema told me that if I didn’t want pitocin I needed to say no firmly, or they’ll just keep asking me.

 The next day…

Through the morning and afternoon I felt refreshed and ready to continue on in labor. I was confident that God was taking care of us. Auntie Jacque was in and out of the room and Gramma came in for a few to speak encouragement over me. She also brought Daddy & Kashema some food. Through the contractions I was almost completely zoned out or in “labor land”. One of the things that helped me not tense up or fight the flow of the contractions was to imagine that I was surfing. When I felt a rush coming on I would paddle out past the waves and to a buoy where you were, place you on my board and paddle hard to ride the waves back in to shore. During one of the rushes I was sitting on the toilet in the bathroom with Daddy and as he held me up I closed my eyes and paddled my arms like I was surfing.

At this point in labor it was getting hard for me to sit back on my butt. My favorite positions to be in were the birth ball and lying over the bed as it was fully inclined up.  I fell asleep on the birthing ball with my face buried on pillows at the foot of the bed as Kash sat in front of me and Daddy rubbed my lower back. The midwife who was on shift for that day was one that I was hoping I wouldn’t have during my labor with you. I remember going home in tears after my 40 week appointment with her trying to understand why she was trying to push an induction on me when I still had time before there was any reason for concern. She had said that she thought you were going to be a “really big baby” and that I shouldn’t feel bad if I was done being pregnant and just wanted you to be born. I DID want you to be born – but I wanted more than anything to wait for you. When I found out she was going to be with us I looked at Kash and Daddy and they reassured me it was going to be alright. When she came in to check me, I asked her to not disclose how far along I was in dilation. She didn’t give me a number but looked up at me with concern and said that there were things that we could do for me to make me more relaxed & to encourage labor when it was stalled. Pitocin was suggested – but we were given a few hours to decide. Kashema asked her if she thought that the lack of progression was due to your position. She responded that there was no way for her to tell.

  We used those few hours to do everything we could to help you naturally. When she came back in we decided to give pitocin a shot but to make sure that it was the lowest dose possible and that we could allow my body to dictate whether we would keep me on it. Once the pitocin doses kicked in things intensified but I was able to ride the waves that were coming without anything else. Daddy suggested we get in the water. So we tried to shower in the small shower attached to the room we were in. Daddy spent most of the time in pitch black dark with me – the water hitting my back sitting on a chair that took up the whole space –and holding me from halfway in halfway out of the shower freezing but holding me and reassuring me as I was moving through the rushes. He decided to bathe me while we were in there and that was the first time in our marriage where either of us took care of each other to that extent. (He washed my butt) –it meant the world to me, because this is how I saw my Mommy and Daddy love and serve each other when I was growing up; (taking care of each other when they were at their most vulnerable and weakest). I cried to him in the shower. I let him know how discouraged I was. When we walked out of the shower and into the hospital room – Daddy heard a song playing “I could be safe here in your arms and never leave home and never let these walls down… but you have called me higher, you have called me deeper and I’ll go where you will lead me Lord.” He sang the words over me and spoke them out loud into that moment reminding me of how appropriate a reminder it was. God was calling us in deeper.

I sat back on the birthing ball and Kash sat in front of me again. She read scripture over me and showed me photos from her birth – empowering me to know that my body was made for this. I rode the waves. Auntie Jacque took her spot when she needed to step out and Daddy took some time to sleep a little. I held Auntie Jacque’s hands as things intensified. Still I rode the waves. Then things started to intensify too quickly – before I could get a good grip on where I was I could see the pitocin dose rising. I tried my best to breathe through them but it was escalating too fast and I became afraid of the rushes instead of excited for them. I looked at Auntie Jacque and told her adamantly I didn’t have it. She looked back at me and told me how strong I was and that I could do it. I woke Daddy up and he said the same thing. A slow panic started to arise inside me. I didn’t have it. I couldn’t do it. These were what rang in my mind. Soon Kash came back and I looked at her – she watched the clock to see how fast my contractions were coming and she was my voice to tell the nurse to stop increasing the pitocin. After that, they needed to re-hydrate my body so I was put on an IV. My contractions had sometimes lasted for almost five minutes – it felt like I was making progress.

 Night came and the midwife checked me an hour before her shift was going to end my cervix hadn’t dilated anymore. I had been stuck at 6.5 centimeters for almost 24 hours.

I was so discouraged.

 I looked at Kash. I looked at Daddy.

 I saw no way for me to continue to labor.

I was exhausted and I didn’t understand why things were not progressing.

 Again Kashema asked if it was your position. We were given more options to aide in pain relief and it was heavily suggested that THAT was the reason why I wasn’t progressing—so we were given time to decide if we wanted to pursue an epidural and see if the pitocin on a higher dose would help. Daddy and I were given the opportunity to go to a better bigger shower from a kind nurse who was attending us. Kashema encouraged me to lay it all out there with Daddy and hold nothing back. 

 We went in shower and I wept on Daddy’s chest. I told him everything that I was feeling. How discouraged I felt. All the pressure I felt from the nurses and midwives. How I didn’t understand and was so frustrated with God. What was he doing? Why wasn’t this working? I just wanted the very best for my baby girl and weren’t we pursuing that? I told him how I felt like if I opted for the epidural I would have failed—and that I didn’t want you to have ANY drugs in your system when you were born because of my own birth story. I was born in that very hospital—and my Mom was on the streets before having me, and I was always told that I was born a drug baby who ended up in the NICU for the first month of my life separated from her. As I cried on Daddy’s chest I realized that I had been holding onto that fear and released it. I was ok with getting the epidural and hoped that if anything it would help me sleep for a while so that I could finish labor with you strong.

 The Home Stretch….

When we got back to the room we let the team know that we would go ahead and proceed with the epidural & pitocin plan. They seemed happy and got someone to come in right away. Kash came back and we were prepared to continue labor once the epidural kicked in. Once it was set –only about 30 minutes went by before the midwife came in to introduce the next midwife on shift. She introduced herself and then told us that she was going to have to bring in the Labor and Delivery team who were going to tell me that they would need to perform a C-section.

 My heart fell to the floor.

What?

I began to weep.

 Daddy held onto my hand tightly as I wept and cried out angrily to God. The midwife in front of me tried to console me and Kash held onto my legs. Daddy got on the bed and hovered over me so that he could see my face. He told me that it was going to be alright—and that if this is the way that he gets to keep both me and his baby girl then this is the way we are going to do it. I just couldn’t wrap my mind around it.

 Your heartbeat was so strong.

You showed no signs of distress.

 I had a healthy pregnancy with you.

Why this way?

This is the one way that I did not even prepare for because it just wasn’t going to happen to me.

I felt like I had failed.

I felt like my body was broken.

 The midwife explained that because my water had been broken now for 24 hours that they were concerned for your well-being and told me that you were at risk for infection. When the OBGYN came in I recognized her. Daddy and I had met her on a trip to the ER during pregnancy for swelling in my right leg. She wasn’t even who we were supposed to see that night but took care of us because the midwife on duty was attending a birth. I felt very reassured by God that he was still working things for my good.

 She explained that they didn’t want to risk anything at this point and that I had done an amazing job. She reassured me that we would find out what was wrong.

  C-section….

I was a nervous wreck. A million thoughts were running through my head. I had never had major surgery before let alone something this intense. I thought that I was going to die. Daddy felt very similarly to me, but held his head high and was my rock –reminding me that no matter what I had nothing to fear. Grandpa Pickles came in just before this to say goodbye to me and kissed me on the forehead. I felt strong knowing that I had family around me. They came in to prep us for surgery and Kashema hugged me and left, telling me that the next time she saw me I would be holding my sweet girl in my arms. They had to take me into the OR first and Daddy was sent to a waiting room alone. This is where he started to feel weak, but God gave him strength.

 In the OR I had to press into not being afraid. Tears were falling from my face but I was anticipating meeting you for the first time. I imagined what you would look like and how your little hands would feel in mine. The nurses and entire medical team reassured me as they set everything up. The anesthesiologist was the one person I saw consistently as he stood over me while everyone else prepped everything. He had kind eyes and when my body started shaking from the medication that they had given me, he held my arms. Once everyone set everything up, the surgeon came in and I was so scared because Daddy wasn’t in the room yet. I didn’t want you to be born without Daddy. As soon as I could blink Daddy was standing over me and nestled his cheek up against mine. I looked in his eyes and with tears pouring down I told him how much I loved him and how incredible it was being his wife. Tears welled up in his eyes and he reassured me and told me how much he loved me. The midwife who came in to tell me about the c-section was with us and used Daddy’s camera to take pictures of everything.

Daddy held my hand.

 It was time for you to be born.

 Birth…

When they made the incision I could feel them moving things around inside me. They reached in to pull you out, and I could feel that they needed to tug and maneuver to pull you up from the birth canal. The OBGYN who came in was assisting the surgeon and shouted out “There is nothing wrong with your body Mama!” Soon your little head was pulled up and out of the opening and as you came out you POOPED all over their operating table, while letting out the sweetest most beautiful first cry!

When I heard you my heart melted.

Daddy saw you come through the opening but I couldn’t see you.

 All I wanted was to see you.

They took you over to the bassinet to clean you up and I SAW YOU! I cried tears of joy and could barely cry out that’s my baby girl. You were crying so I called out to you to reassure you and you heard my voice. As you heard me talking to you, you turned your little head in my direction and my heart exploded into a million pieces and I started crying all over again because you knew me. They wrapped you up in a little blanket and Daddy got to hold you first. He brought you over to me and nestled your cheek to mine. I kissed your sweet face and told you how much I loved you.

Daddy kept holding you because the medication that I had been given made me pass out while they were sewing me back up. Daddy took this opportunity to take a selfie with you. I woke up shortly after and it was time for us to be wheeled over to recovery. The OBGYN who had been with us the whole time, told me to pull down my hospital gown and placed you on my chest, skin to skin. Daddy, who had left to give our placenta to a friend, was so happy to find us together in the recovery room snuggling. He left thinking that he was going to come back to a very different scene. When he went out to give the placenta, he saw that our family had stayed in the waiting room while you were born!

Everyone couldn’t wait to meet you, so we let each of them come in and see you. Daddy and I just couldn’t stop staring at you. I had never felt such deep and beautiful love until you were placed in my arms.

Daddy and I looked at each other with more love in our hearts than we ever dreamed possible.

We were together.

We were a family.

Our little family.

 Aria, I know that your birth story isn’t as serene and easy as some other beautiful birth stories.

In my desire to give you the best of everything I wanted so badly for your birth to not be chaotic.

But it was.

It was filled with wave after wave of what seemed to be obstacles.

It was overwhelming and did not look like anything I imagined it would.

But it was beautiful and wild.

Much like the ocean raging during a storm.

Your birth points to the master of the waves. He gets the glory. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Happy Birthday my darling.

 Love Mom.