#also air new zealand has free inflight wifi for the whole flight so i'm uploading this via a 14 hour long flight lmfaooooo

[dumplingsjinson]

Chaotic Roommate Prompts mayhaps?

List of chaotic roommate prompts

Character A hearing a knock on their window. Considering how they live on the second floor, they don’t think much of it — might be a tree branch scraping past with how windy it is tonight. Then they hear it again — the distinct thumping against their window pane. Raising a brow, they pull their curtain aside and see Character B grinning at them through the glass, dangling on a thick tree branch. “What the fuck?!” they yelp, quickly opening the window and being met with a cold draft. “What are you doing, [name]? Are you fucking insane?!” They quickly help Character B clamber through their window. “Sorry,” Character B says once they’re safe and sound on Character A’s bedroom floor. “I forgot my keys, and since you usually ignore anyone knocking at the front door, I figured this was my best bet. Which it was, so no harm done!” 

“Why are you naked.” “Because the air-conditioning’s not working.” “Okay, but you really don’t need to chill out in your birthday suit on the couch of all places. This is a shared space!” “It’s not like you haven’t seen me naked before.” “That’s not the point.”

Character B loudly sobbing over their ex for the eighth night in a row (at least that’s what Character A thinks) and so, being the nosy person they are, they decide to check up on them, only to find out they’ve been sobbing over a 100k worded fanfiction they found on AO3. “Are you fucking serious?” Character A grumbles, while Character B wipes under their eyes with their suspiciously snotty tissue. “It’s not my fault this fic is so well-written!” 

“I’m going to need you to stop coming back drunk at two in the morning, spouting the dumbest conspiracy theories known to mankind because I’m losing a lot of brain cells because of you.”

Character B, when drunk, would end up curled up on the middle of Character A’s bed. Character A has learned the lesson of trying to wake them up during those moments, so whenever this happens, they leave them be and resort to sleeping on the couch.

Character B trying to take care of Character A when they fall sick but instead, make a mess of the kitchen. “…It’s the effort that counts,” Character A says monotonously as they survey the degree of damage done to the kitchen the next day. 

Character B sitting on Character A’s lap when there’re seats and couches throughout the house for them to plop their asses on.

(If they’re close enough) Character B making moaning sounds in the background if they happen to be in the same room as Character A and Character A’s on the phone with their parents. 

“That’s not how you change a lightbulb!” “Well, I’m no lightbulb technician!” “I already told you I know how to change a fucking lightbulb yet you took it to tasking yourself with this!”

Character B sneaking a speaker into Character A’s room and blasting their music to scare the fuck out of Character A and, also, to wake them up. 

“Stop stealing my takeaway, you dipshit!” 

“Okay, you’re not going into the kitchen ever again! You’re not allowed near any sort of stove from now on!” “But—” “No buts, I don’t want this place to be burned to crisps! I want my deposit back, for God's sake!”

“Can you stop telling my parents that we’re dating?” “I’m only sparing you from them asking why you’re still so pathetically single.”

“I know you’ve been stealing my hoodies from my closet.”

“Can you lock the door the next time you take a shower?” “Maybe you should learn how to knock, how about that? Plus, no one gets to see this plump ass very often so you should count yourself lucky.”