jessibaexoxox

[elssbethtascioni]

I wish I didn't, but I did.

[obviousartist]

So no one asked for this but here it is

this is so random gosh

@luxet​

Questions in bold

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?

Spotify ‘till the end!

Is your room messy or clean?

It would probably surprise people, but it’s so dang messy.

What color are your eyes?

Brown.

Do you like your name? Why?

I don’t know, I feel like it’s kind of overused because I know a ton of people with the same name.

What is your relationship status?

Single pringle! Although some people are trying to set me up. So far, no progress, which is fine by me.

Describe your personality in 3 words or less.

Dude, I died.

I know that’s not a real description, but I’m a HUGE pessimist, and I use that sentence too much, I should probably stop, but dude, I actually died, though.

What color hair do you have?

Brown.

What kind of car do you drive? Color?

Non car = non couleur

Where do you shop?

Where DO I shop? When was the last time I went shopping?

Edit: okay so I went shopping today. At Harris Teeter. Is this asking where I like food shop or where I clothes shop?

How would you describe your style?

Dude, I don’t have a style. I am soooooooooo style-less. I don’t know, though, because Buzzfeed (not an accurate source) always says I’m a hipster. Although, it also says I’m 50, which I can assure you, I am not.

Favorite social media account.

TUMBLRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What size bed do you have?

Twin. But I should really get a new one.

Any siblings?

One annoying as f**k brother.

If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Why?

Great Britain. Lots of culture, and they speak English too. Or NYC. Also much culture and BROADWAY, GUYS. BROADWAY!

Favorite Snapchat filter?

Non Snapchat = non filter

Favorite makeup brand(s)

I wear makeup like twice a year, okay? IDK.

How many times a week do you shower?

Usually every day, but I only wash my hair three/four times a week.

Favorite TV show?

I mean, Ellen is great, right?

Shoe size?

You can’t laugh. It’s a 4/4.5 women’s.

How tall are you?

We are now 5’2”. I know, shorty here.

Sandals or sneakers?

Sneakers. My nails look like trash.

Do you go to the gym?

Sometimes. Not usually, though, because I do many other physical activities already, so it’s not really helpful to wear myself out if I have to dance the next day or something.

Describe your dream date.

Ok. As a forever single pringle, I don’t really know (as of now). But. I will say that a serious creative something would be actually really nice. Not like painting class. But like reading. Performances. Things like that. Even movies (although the book is probably better).

How much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

Kid, I’m broke. Haha. #liveswithparents

What color socks are you wearing?

I am currently barefoot, as I like it.

How many pillows do you sleep with?

Two. Deux. Dos. Due. Duo.

Do you have a job? What do you do?

No job here.

How many friends do you have?

I don’t know. I have my best friends and then I have my friends and then I have my kind of friends and then I have my acquaintances. I know a lot of people. I don’t like a lot of them.

What’s the worst thing you have ever done?

I don’t know. Not for me to judge.

What’s your favorite candle scent?

Vanilla.

3 favorite boy names

Alex, Jordan, and Eden.

3 favorite girl names

Alex, Elizabeth, and Jordan. Big fan of unisex names.

Favorite actor?

I don’t knowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Why did I start this, this is very hard?

Favorite actress?

Emma Watson. That one’s easy.

Who is your celebrity crush?

We’re still sorting that out; hold on. ONE ETERNITY LATER . . .

Favorite movie?

The Parent Trap? The Sound of Music? IDEK ok?

Do you read a lot? What’s your favorite book?

Of course I read a lot. STOP ASKING ME TO CHOOSE MY FAVORITE CHILD. THERE IS NONE.

Money or brains?

I have neither, but if I got to choose money or brains, I would definitely choose brains.

Do you have a nickname? What is it?

No nickname. I guess I’m just not that kind of person.

How many times have you been to the hospital?

I regret to say a few.

Top 10 favorite songs

You’re really in for it, guys. I’m Not Famous - AJR Me Too - Meghan Trainor Uma Thurman - Fall Out Boy Nightmare - Halsey Boy With Luv - BTS If I Can’t Have You - Shawn Mendes I Don’t Care - Ed Sheeran SOS - Avicii Summer on You - PRETTYMUCH Kiss and Make Up - Dua Lipa Summer - Calvin Harris

Others include:

Bloom - Troye Sivan

You Need To Calm Down - Taylor Swift

Do you take any medications daily?

I take vitamin D/calcium supplements. Not medication, but okay.

What is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

A what what a what what what? I’m guessing oily?

What is your biggest fear?

Scaredy cat here, so I’ve got a lot of fears. I fear failure and being unwanted, though.

How many kids do you want?

Two. Deux. Dos. Duo.

What’s your go to hair style?

Ponytail.

What type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

Medium, I guess?

Who is your role model?

Emma Watson. Misty Copeland. Our female leaders leading change in the world.

What was the last compliment you received?

Uhm. I have no idea, man. I don’t even remember when it was.

What was the last text you sent?

No texting, but I do Skype. “Look kid idk but u said bye so ur loss”

How old were you when you found out Santa wasn’t real?

I had had my suspicions. But I don’t know who it actually was, and it is driving me kind of mad. I can assume it was my parents.

What is your dream car?

Honda Civic. Very sleek, not overly expensive.

I feel so boring.

Opinion on smoking?

DON’T FREAKING DO IT! I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU SMOKE. DON’T DO IT!

Do you go to college?

One day, my friends. One day.

What is your dream job?

Photographer? Editor? I don’t even know, okay?

Would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

Suburbs. You don’t have to drive really far to get somewhere, but it’s still kind of calm.

Do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

Yes. Always.

Do you have freckles?

Nope. Zero. Nada.

Do you smile for pictures?

Sometimes.

How many pictures do you have on your phone?

No phone, but I have a crap ton on my computer.

Have you ever peed in the woods?

Yeah. It was awful.

Do you still watch cartoons?

Non, merci.

Do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

Can I not eat either?

Favorite dipping sauce?

Soy sauce. Or sesame oil, depending on what food it is.

I’ll settle for ranch for some vegetables.

What do you wear to bed?

Sweatpants/shorts and a T-Shirt/cami.

Have you ever won a spelling bee?

No, I wish.

What are your hobbies?

I play piano and I dance. I also die, but we don’t talk about that.

Can you draw?

I’m decent, I guess. No. I’m awful.

Do you play an instrument?

Piano and viola. DON’T @ ME ABOUT PLAYING THE VIOLA.

What was the last concert you saw?

My school orchestra concert.

Tea or coffee?

Water. Orange juice. Neither.

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

Starbucks.

Do you want to get married?

Oui oui.

What is your crush’s first and last initial?

Uhm. Okay. So. SD.

Are you going to change your last name when you get married?

I don’t know. Depends on their last name.

What color looks best on you?

Black/navy blue.

Do you miss anyone right now?

My mom went somewhere (not disclosing) and my friends from school because it’s summer.

Do you sleep with your door open or closed?

Shut. Always. I have a brother. And a cat.

Do you believe in ghosts?

Non.

What is your biggest pet peeve?

People chewing with their mouths open. Ew.

Jeez I have so many, we’ll just say that for now.

Last person you called?

My mom.

Favorite ice cream flavor?

Vanilla. I promise I’m not boring.

Regular Oreos or golden Oreos?

GOLDEN!!!!

Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

Rainbow.

What shirt are you wearing?

An old Battle of the Books T-shirt from school.

What is your phone background?

No phone, but my computer background is an image of the Slytherin common room.

Are you outgoing or shy?

I am selectively outgoing.

Do you like it when people play with your hair?

I don’t know because no one touches it.

Do you like your neighbors?

I don’t know my neighbors. There’s this family that moved in and I’ve seen like two kids. Once on the day they got here. Another time when one of them was mowing the lawn. I don’t know them.

Do you wash your face? At night? In the morning?

At night.

Have you ever been high?

Non, merci.

Have you ever been drunk?

Non, merci.

Last thing you ate?

Peaches and apples.

Favorite lyrics right now.

STOP MAKING ME CHOOSE MY FAVORITE CHILD.

But: “Shade never made anyone less gay,” Taylor Swift - You Need To Calm Down

Summer or winter?

Summer.

Day or night?

Night. It’s currently 10:48 PM over here.

Dark, milk, or white chocolate?

White chocolate all the way.

Favorite month?

August.

What is your zodiac sign?

Leo.

Who was the last person you cried in front of?

I don’t know, okay? Probably my mom, though, knowing me.

I’m so boring.

Thank you so much for reading all of the sh*t I wrote up there.

[bollywood-and-phoenix-feather]

*sails in* soooo if you're still taking prompts *waggles eyebrows* Can I get cutesy Maurauders + Lily shenanigans? Idek what kind of shenanigans, but preferably pre-ship mutually pining wolfstar & pre-ship banter Jily. I was gonna ask for angst but then I realized that my poor heart Can't Take It.

no angst, she says

sorry this took me forever babe

read it on ao3 here

James and Sirius are, with their usual propensity for very bad timing, having a Standoff.

Peter knows this because James has actually finished his homework on Cheering Charms, despite his continued and vociferous objections when the assignment was announced in class. This, naturally, means that James will have an excuse to be best friends with Remus and ignore Sirius; ergo, Remus will be quite obviously too happy to be included to worry overmuch about Gryffindor Tower’s resident drama queen. In sum (and here’s what Peter’s good at; not charms, but people) - in sum, this means that Peter will be stuck entertaining Sirius Arsing Black while pretending that he wouldn’t rather be literally anywhere else.

That’s the thing about the four of them; they’re really only friends sometimes, and how many friends each of them has varies based on the day and its succession of probabilities; minimum none, maximum three, with Remus, to his astonishment, holding the candle for the highest calculated mean.

Remus must be the easiest to get along with; he’s quiet and unassuming and mostly just astonished to have friends. It works, of course, for James and Sirius, who probably get off on being adored, but not Peter. Peter is content to watch.

Does that make him strange?

He wonders this, as Sirius places another card on top of the already-precarious house of Exploding Snaps Cards. As a rule, the sharper Sirius’s fragile construction’s angles, the more brassed off he is, and today the cards are nearly vertical. Peter is aware, distantly, that he’s going to win, and that this will sour Sirius’s mood further. He wonders if he can Incendio his own stack without Sirius noticing.

He probably can. Sirius isn’t a watcher, like Peter, which brings him back to the point, as he nudges his wand inside his pocket and then darts back before the cards explode spectacularly in his face. Peter doesn’t, actually, think it’s strange. Really, he sometimes thinks he’s the most Gryffindor of them all; he’s good at losing himself and being brave for others - at looking at the bigger picture, at realizing that some things are more important than his own insecurities.

This also has the consequence of making him the most valuable Marauder. James and Sirius are too flashy to be of much pranking use; Remus not daring enough - so it falls to Peter to mastermind, to use the genius that surrounds him to bring pranks to life.

This is why James and Peter are friends. Sirius and Peter are friends because Peter takes slightly less bullshit from him than James does. Remus and Peter, however -

Remus and Peter are friends because of the boggart assignment.

Remus and Peter are friends because Peter knows about Remus and the full moon, and Remus knows about Peter’s Muggle dad, and they very particularly don’t talk about it and instead tell each other the locations of their private Honeydukes stashes.

(They are also friends because when Peter, watching as always, saw the way Remus stared at Sirius like he was the star he was named for, he just offered him an Acid Pop - one pain to distract from another.)

Peter realizes with a dawning self-awareness that Sirius may not, in fact, be the most dramatic of their lot. Then again, thirteen though they may be, they are simultaneously much older with experience and much younger with the giddy freedom Hogwarts provides - all except for James, who knows what it is to grow up happy, who actually looks forward to summer hols.

(In two years, Sirius will get absolutely sloshed on nicked Firewhisky and admit to Peter, slurred and soft, that no, I wouldn’t trust myself with one of them little buggers, the whole bloody world knows I’m too much like that - that - absolute tit of a Mum I’ve got, but really Peter, one day you ‘n James 'n Remus 'n especially James are going to raise a whole host of brats, and you bet I’m gonna be there to treat them right -

Peter will carefully omit the fact that Remus once told him something very similar, in the lofty tones he gets after the moon when he’s too tired to soften his speech - I’d never wish that kind of - that fucking wolf - on a kid, Peter, I couldn’t -

Good thing you’re bent as Wagnar the Wild’s cursed dick, then, Peter will say, just to make him laugh, even though it’s not, strictly, true. Remus will smile anyway.)

Pain and love and heartbreak, which are all the same thing; prank plans and maps that melt back into their parchment - Peter keeps these close to his chest, guarding them because they belong to his friends. He’s always been their Secret-Keeper, and Merlin knows they need one, these boys with brazenness hanging around their shoulders like tattered Quidditch cloaks, who wouldn’t know subtlety if it was printed on Snape’s gray underpants.

Right now, for example, the night of October 30th, that brazenness is in full force - right now, James and Sirius are having a Standoff, and Peter holds the secret behind this too.

He’d like to think that this one is a little more painless than the others, but where Snivellus is involved, that’s never true. Slimy Snape, however, isn’t the secret this time - it’s his friend with the blazing hair and attitude and the heavy, heavy chip on her shoulder.

(Peter thinks distantly that his friends should have better taste.)

“Now that Prince James has condescended to grace us with his presence - ”

“I was helping Evans with her detention, fuck off - ”

“ - and has perhaps remembered who his real friends are - ”

“Sirius, I swear on Merlin’s saggy fucking tits - ”

“Language,” says Remus, idly. “Are we going to start or not?” Peter meets his eye, rewards him with a sympathetic eyeroll for speaking up.

“We might have an hour ago if James hadn’t run off with some - ”

“Jealousy is unbecoming,” Remus starts -

“As if you’ve ever had to deal with being jealous - ” Sirius says, immediately. Peter winces, and Remus colors, shutting his mouth audibly.

Peter chooses this moment to clear his throat. “Three cheers for Sirius, who got the mass release charm working,” he says, raising his voice, because flattery always smooths things over. The teachers think he worships the other three, but that’s not quite true; he’s just more willing to concede. Less stubborn pride, a bit more sense. “Did we decide on Dungbombs or Smokebombs?” he asks, opening the floor.

With a - thank Merlin - minimum of whinging, the annual Halloween Prank Planner’s Meeting Number Four is set back on track.

James makes a lot of hand gestures. Sirius makes a lot more hand gestures, most of which are more crude. Remus pokes at places on a map of the castle with his wand, letting it spark each time he does. Sirius yells a little, James yells quite a lot, and Remus yells not at all.

Peter watches, and decides.

It’s always worked for them, and it will this time as well. Without too much broken glass, and less ripped curtains than last year, the plans are set.

The evening of the Halloween feast is crisp and clear; they watch the artificial sky closely for rain, but Fortune has conceded to favor their audacity. It’s the first year they’ve tried anything bigger than the Gryffindor common room, and Peter can see it on their faces, alive and dancing. Remus has placed the bombs, James and Sirius have activated the delayed release charms, and Peter has headed off Crib, the aging Squib janitor.

The stage is set, Peter thinks, and he settles in to watch.

It is, in his definitely-unbiased opinion, thoroughly magnificent. Thick, magenta-orange smoke billows from the mouth of each painstakingly-charmed gargoyle, smothing teachers and students alike in vibrant powder. When everyone is coughing, wands lit to see through the haze, Sirius lights the powder with a flick of his wand, unleashing a Halloween surprise on the unsuspecting student body.

Teachers watch their teeth lengthen and bloody in horror as their faces dip with unnatural pallor; the Hufflepuff table sprouts fur in Remus’s idea of a bad joke. The Slytherin table (obviously) grows scales; Snivellus gets to turn into an eel, wet and flopping around, causing most of the table to shriek in disgust. The Gryffindor and Ravenclaw students sprout feathers, the Gryffindors puffing up towards the ceiling like balloons while the Ravenclaws see their arms growing membranous bat wings.

In the middle are the Marauders, triumphant with faces and robes alight.

As quickly as it starts, it’s over; students and teachers sink gratefully back into their own bodies, with the exception of Snivellus. With a little more work, Peter thinks, they could extend the spell to hit during classes instead of at the feast.

Professor McGonagall is furious, and good old Dumbledore orders them to his office immediately, but Peter can see McGonagall’s mouth twitching furiously, the sparkle in Dumbledore’s blue eyes. They’re safe, for now.

Sirius is hollering with fierce joy - “Bloody well worked, didn’t it, well done Lupin - ”

“It was you, you got the charm working - ”

“ - don’t you lot go forgetting who placed all those fiddly smoke bombs,” James puts in, not willing to be left out.

Peter grins as he watches them argue, because these are his friends and today, they’re kings.

*

The trip to the headmaster’s goes much as expected. Dumbledore and McGonagall take each of them aside, asking if they might possibly know the instigator’s of tonight’s antics.

Peter shakes his head, lets his eyes go wide and innocent. “It was probably one of the fourth-years,” he says. “Saw Bones and her Hufflepuff friends looking shifty this morning.”

McGonagall’s nostrils flare. “Pettigrew,” she says, not unkindly. “It will be better for both you and your friends if you tell me the truth.”

Dumbledore’s gaze pierces him, and Peter swallows down a sudden, bright gulp of fear. They’ll all get detention anyway, and he doubts anyone would see him any differently if he told - after all, everyone already knows they did it, Sirius was yelling loud enough to wake the ghosts -

Someone bangs on the office door. “Minnie,” says James, impudent. “We didn’t do it, we swear! Can we go, now?”

His friends are outside, and he’s their Secret-Keeper. Peter smiles guilelessly at the two, and says, “I am telling the truth, Professors.”

*

Peter is right. They get detention anyway and Sirius complains bitterly and Remus just smiles in resignation and rolls up his sleeves and James throws an arm around Peter’s shoulder and tells him thanks for not telling, I know you were scared, and Peter wonders suddenly if he’s not the only one who watches.

*

(It’s still the best day of their lives. The Halloween Prank is cemented as tradition almost immediately; the full moon is conveniently avoiding the Halloween weekend, which means they can plot, succeed, and drink celebratory butterbeer the night of Sirius’s birthday in peace.

McGonagall’s punishment doesn’t start until the fourth of November - Sirius says it’s because Minnie secretly cares and doesn’t want to lock him up in detention on his birthday, but James thinks it’s Dumbledore’s idea of a last hurrah. Peter thinks they’re both right.

Later, when the other two are asleep, Sirius will confide to him, hushed and young, I hope it’s like this always.)