#also man i love his mask. i hate that i resigned myself to drawing more hands than necessary

[warlordfelwinter]

just a quick sketch i decided to color

our wildsea character/ship creation session is next week, im so excited. i still haven't chosen a name for him 😭

[ryttu3k]

Finishing up SoNY, ‘bad’ end and final thoughts!

But first, the early game over.

Wow, she just gets shot. Not even slurped? That’s rude as hell XD;;

And on to the ‘bad’ end!

Beginning is much the same, ofc.

“You’re too in love with weaving a good story and establishing a seductive narrative to let facts get in the way.” Foreshadowing for the ‘good’ end, maybe?

God that Embrace scene gives me literal goosebumps.

Alright! Last time I did Danse Macabre and Retributive Justice, let’s try The Risks of Swiping Right!

lmao god I’d eat this guy too. Back to the ghost club! That legitimately is a really neat scene. ...Ooh yes so that’s where the girl was from.

Panhard just lowkey dying at the mental image of Katherine Weise in a fast food restaurant is so good.

The sweet scene between Julia and Dakota hits a bit different after the ‘good’ end XD;;

Went to the park, reminisced, and helped out the guy. That was sweet ;_; High-humanity Julia, this time!

‘Fairy God Mother?’ is great but ‘Vin Diesel?’ is objectively the funnier response.

“Shining even more brightly than usual, Aisling.” Samira got a cru-ush~

Poor Julie. It’s probably been tough without Sophie around :(

Huh. Interestingly, refusing to lie to Mia results in Julia actually feeling genuine loyalty to the Cammies (for now, at least).

Believing Agathon is still alive = more optimistic = different dialogue! See, this is how you make choices have consequences, game!

Oooh boy time to meet Adelaide XD;;

“She uncrosses her legs in a strangely seductive motion. In her mind’s eye, it probably looked like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct, but in reality, it had all the grace of a tracksuit Slav squatting.” *snickering*

Fight me, Adelaide >:(

‘sup Nastya. Went with the slightly less disruptive routine here XD Huh, she’s an aspiring DJ! Julia is deeply confused as to how being a DJ and being head of security works together.

lmao Julia referring to Hope as a girlboss. That phrase has lost all meaning to me...

The conversation between Julia and Father Leonard is still really interesting. Man, you know who I want Julia to talk to? Anatole. Interesting insights into balancing being queer Catholic vampires there for sure.

lmao oh my god I want to fight this street reporter.

‘I can almost feel my brain losing its wrinkles.’ *snort*

Yeaghhhh the Abyss bit is still so creepy...

Oops. Being honest regarding Tamika and Torque’s relationships gets a fail :(

Oh, or not XD That works! Also, uh, apparently the giant albino ghoul alligator is real, according to New York by Night. He’s Calebros’ pet.

“Because I think I have a pretty good nose for people’s auras. And when I take a good look at you... ...somehow, I have a feeling you’re a surprisingly decent person. Whatever way of unlife you choose, I hope you don’t change it. And that you remember my advice.” :)

“I know.” Oof.

“Hi.” “WAAAH!” lmao sorry Princess XD;; Just trying to imagine Qadir’s face as he tells Julia to find a 1990 glass statue of Scrooge McDuck... dying...

Oh she’s so a Toreador XD Low art options are a fantasy book, an anime DVD, or a video game... those can all be arty, though! And went with the anime DVD called ‘Ririsu no Daibouken’... that translates to ‘Adventures of Lilith’. How on the nose XD “The cover says ‘Lilith’s Carnal Carnival’.” Oh. Yeah, that’d do it XD

“This 90s original video anime presents us with a tale of five big-bosomed samurai warriors travelling through America in search of General Hastavista, The Incubus King. Don’t let all the titillation misguide you: the main draws here are peerless direction, a nearly avant-garde editing rhythm and dialogue that coyly comments on traditional gender roles in anime. Once you see the animation in the final battle, you’ll understand why it never fails to set a sakuga fan’s heart ablaze!”

She’s my new favourite.

“So can I know your name now?”

“Hmmm... Let me think...

No. <3″

I need to stress that the heart appears in the dialogue box. Like. The actual less-than-three heart.

Didn’t investigate the rat this time, so Qadir did and I die. “Glad you’re alright, little guy.” Qadir...

Still not over the drunk blood doll rats.

Kaiser’s still a goddamn creep and this time Julia is not going too far. She still has her humanity, dammit. Final set of traits:

Loyal to the end

Glass half-full

Not into a bad cop schtick

Honesty is the best policy

No more human, still humane

Onwards to the ‘bad’ end! Oops, and Dakota still did the Single White Female thing XD;;

Man I’m still really curious who the ‘good friend’ is!!

Okay! Time for end game!!

So that’s the good friend, huh? “Let me phrase it differently, then. You’re not Ecaterina the Wise, the Agitator of Prague, a Brujah elder causing turbulences all over the world... are you?”

Mention of Christof! Mention of Christof doing shady shit :| Poor Hana.

“An immigrant from Eastern Europe comes to New York City, takes the position she always expected to find herself in, is molded into someone who is no longer herself.”

Julia and Dakota representing Carthage is kind of neat.

I want to say the mention of St Jude is a reference, but I’m not sure what to XD;; Is that from Redemption? Christof could have been the one to tell Hana that.

“Like a two-person human centipede loop or something. An Ouroburos? Or an, uhh, Mobius strip?” No, that’s the other traditionally Sabbat clan XD

That‘s. That’s a hell of a reconciliation XD “Yeah, let’s give it a try. By the way I’m on the run for my unlife, want to go to California and try to find utopia?”

Julia, wear a fucking mask XD

“Hey.”

“Yeah?“

“Do you love me?”

“... Of course I do. For now, at least.”

I still don’t know if I love her. Or even if I can love anyone, for that matter. I’m a fucking monster, after all. I don’t even know if we’ll exist next month. The prospects are not looking good. But although I can’t see myself in the rearview mirror right now...

...I will remember this image of us leaving the city, somewhat melancholic, and somewhat hopeful, forever. And maybe the meaning of this image will be clarified with time. Or maybe I will just force a more positive description on it, and that is what I’ll believe.

No matter what happens... even if oceans of blood lie before us, I will make this a cherished memory.

Whatever possible salvation still remains for me... ...it probably lies in the eyes of another.

Oh dang I have chills.

So the ‘bad’ ending is about the subverted compromise. Julia resigns herself to letting the compromise about the truth of Callihan’s death go ahead. ‘Catherine’ is a walking compromise to hide the Ecaterina’s real deeds. But while Hana is still stuck in her role for now, Julia refuses to accept the compromise she’s made, both the one relating to the investigation and the compromise she made of her own views and morals. It might blow up in her face, yeah. But damn, she’s going to try.

So, final thoughts! For the sake of completion, this is what I said about Coteries:

And of course this is the part where the game all falls apart :-\

Just… god. This is probably the biggest problem with CoNY, and the reason I didn’t bother getting it until it was like… 60% off. The bulk of the game is great - the writing is intriguing, the design is stunning. But the choices themselves are so limited it’s barely worth even getting it at 60% off!

You have three choices of characters, with their own opening chapters and own individual scenes with their touchstones. You have four choices of coterie members, and three sidequests. You can probably get in at least three full story arcs and a sidequest or two, but you’re only ever limited to two of your coterie members showing up at the not-yet-endgame.

So let’s say you decide to play all three protags, which, indeed, is encouraged (there’s an achievement for it). You are going to repeat coterie arcs and side quests, because there simply aren’t enough for three unique playthroughs.

And then you get to the end and literally everything is scripted. You get attacked by the SI. You get rescued by your two coterie members (and then never see them again, despite the game being called Coteries of New York). You meet Torque, you escape the SI, Sophie reveals her plan to Torque, you go to Ellis Island, Adelaide kills Sophie (and despite the fact that you’re given multiple options there, none of them work), Arturo does his spiel, end of game. You don’t even get to choose between ending up blood bound or going “no fuck you” and at least dying with a bit of dignity!

I just. I really want to like it, and there genuinely is a lot there to like! But uuuugh the ending. Like damn at least give the poor protag the option to choose what happens to them!

Anyway. Not sure what’s next. To get all the achievements, you have to finish with all three protags, so that’s three full runs and a lot of repetitiveness (compare to, say, Bloodlines or Night Road. I have eighty-five hours on Night Road and there’s still stuff I haven’t seen!), so I can’t even just… rush it through up to the meeting with the touchstones on the third play. Nope. Gotta finish it :-\

Final rating: 6/10

8/10 characters, 9/10 atmosphere, 8/10 story aside from ending, 3/10 story ending, 2/10 replayability. Final consensus: get it on major sale if you can, otherwise, you might as well just watch an LP. I might do that instead of doing a third run, although I at least want to do a second.

I ended up revising that 6/10 to 5.5/10 after finishing all runs and getting the achievements just out of how goddamn repetitive it was. So, how does Shadows measure up?

Absolutely continued with all the things I enjoyed about CoNY (characters, atmosphere, and writing), and of the bits I hated (cookie cutter protagonists, lack of real choice, repetitiveness, the godawful ending), every single part has been completely improved.

Instead of three fledglings so similar they even have the same internal thoughts, we have Julia, who’s got such a distinct voice that she becomes the most memorable game protag I’ve seen in years, and I’m including non-VtM games in this. This is absolutely her game, and it’s just... absolutely fascinating to read and watch.

Related - actual real choices. There are five key choices that determine the ending, and every single one has actual consequence in-game. You get different dialogue. Different introspection. Different philosophies. And this carries across - if Julia believes Agathon is alive, she’s more optimistic about her relationship with Dakota, too. And of course, both endings are completely distinct and incredibly written - the ‘good’ ending where Julia gives in to her most Lasombra instincts, plays the game, wins it, gets power and respect at the expense of her humanity and avoiding all those wraiths... or the ‘bad’ ending when she listens to her morals, reconciles with Dakota, and leaves for California, uncertain, but hopeful.

Not a lot of repetitiveness. Yes, by design, you’ll probably do two playthroughs. The main plot is much the same, but there are enough options there to get multiple dialogue options and stuff. And for the little sidequests, you can actually get all in with just the two playthroughs, only repeating like... two, I think. Still, I wasn’t feeling actively bored like I was midway through my second run of CoNY!

Loved seeing more in-depth backstory and development for the coterie members. Agathon’s section was particularly fascinating, literally getting into his head.

And just. Atmosphere and music is so, so good.

Final rating: 9/10. Thank you, Draw Distance, you hit it out of the park.

[viktor-noctis]

The Two Faces of Dr. Jekyll McSh*tFace

This is my review for the film: The Two Faces of Dr. Jekyll McShitFace.

Enjoy.

Tagging @christopherleefan because I think you might enjoy this? Also, I wrote a fic for Taste of Fear (or Scream of Fear for us Americans), and you can expect one for this film as well.

Pre-face: Okay, okay……………………………… Let me compose myself.

………..

………………..

……………………….

……………………………..

Alright, hit the play button.

London 1874 – I paused just to be sure this was the actual date when the book was written.

It was originally published in 1886.

We’re off to a roaring start.

Ew. Children.

Playing in a garden, yep, this is about what I remember.

Little boy shoves girl’s flowers to the ground, and McShitFace talks about “dumb human animals” when referring to children. We agree on that, at least.

“Play out when they cannot speak out.” Jekyll McShitFace suggests they’ve mentally blocked the ability to speak, due to the fact that they are letting another part of them be free to express itself…. What a load of garbage.

You resigned? Here I thought they fired you for being a creep. The fact that Ernst believes he really is a genius makes me want to punch something.

They’ve been married for six years??

No servants, no friends, and Jekyll has cut all professional ties to study the mind… Like a madman. Yeah, I can see Kitty hating this.

Beyond Good and Evil? Beyond the reach of society?

“A very dangerous man, my friend.” No shit, Ernst. Jekyll is suggesting the ‘higher man’ is the one within, while Ernst suggests that the weaker man maybe the ‘evil’ one. Or what we deem ‘evil’. Jekyll, like some, has come to some crackpot conclusion that by drawing out the ‘evil’ man, the ‘weaker’ man within him, that he can isolate and destroy him… Or something to that effect.

Jekyll never answers Ernst when he asks if he’s used it on anything other than a monkey and I find that telling.

Paul is here. Ernst is leaving.

Jekyll is quite charitable to Paul, if nothing else, and Kitty is putting up a marvelous front. Kitty even tries to get him to spend time with her here, but I have a feeling she knows where this is going. She’s probably done this a million times. This is another for the till.

I can tell Kitty is tired of this. Jekyll spends night and day in the lab. All the time. Yeah, that’d wear on most women. Considering the time period, this is all very strange. Then again, this is a ‘Strange Case’, or it was supposed to be.

Kitty telling him about Jekyll shouting to himself in his room, along with a strange voice that wasn’t his own, for an entire night… “Married to a man of great talent.” Ernst, my dude…

Kitty’s asking if he is insane enough to be sent away. Ernst says he isn’t: “we must both try to help him.” Right.

Christopher Lee! Damnit, he’s so tall. How tall is this actress?

They’re so cute. Terrible, but cute.

The top of her head reaches his nose or so. He’s a damn good kisser…

Kitty looks lovely in blue.

And is an extrovert.

Jekyll is an introvert.

Still hate him.

Don’t bash the girl for liking to go out. Or ask her to: “take the evening off”.

“I need you tonight, Kitty. Stay.” That’s not creepy. After years of being ignored, that’s not creepy in the slightest.

Okay, this might be just me, but… I see Kitty’s perspective. I sort of see Jekyll’s? It’s a grey area. I’ve paused it to explain my reasoning –

Kitty, is an extrovert, as I’ve stated. She gets her energy from going out, being around people, and having a good time. That’s great. Good for her, you have fun girl, and take your boytoy (he really is, as often as he gets in money trouble) with you. Jekyll is decidedly not. To say they are incompatible would be an understatement.

Kitty is the type of woman who glows under attention, who craves it from both her partner and others. But mostly, her partner. Enter Paul, who’s proven to be attached to her mostly through money, but there’s so much more there. Again, I love these two, because they’re so terribly flawed, but so clearly in love.

Jekyll, meanwhile, cut all attachment to “live like a hermit in the center of London”. Ernst’s words straight from the beginning of the film. I bet you Kitty was stifled, for years, before Paul came along. Now, not much is revealed of the how Jekyll became friends with him, when he did, or even why he did, but I want to bet it was during University or something. That seems the most likely theory, given Jekyll’s nature.

The Jekyll side is a bit more convoluted. Again, I don’t think Kitty is being unfair here. There’s no telling how long she stayed lonely, cooped up in that house (reference back to when Ernst talked about no friends, no company, and no servants), and was just… bored, sad, and upset.

Ernst even mentioned the house being ‘in ruins’.

She calls him selfish for making it such an issue. I get the feeling he sort of deserves it. Also, she’s in love with Paul now, so that adds another layer to their relationship not working and being incredibly strained.

“I’m not going to insult my friends for the sake of your whims.” Is what her argument amounted to. Again, the movie is making her sound like the selfish one, but you really have to take into account the history, nature, and aspects of each character. In doing so, I don’t really think she is. I think she’s in love with another man, bound to a farce of a marriage, and is doing the best she can by not staying near her creepy husband.

And yep, human experimentation time.

Yeah, go ahead McShitFace, sit at your desk and wait to become The Literal Worst.

Party time. I’m shuddering. Too. Many. People. Ew.

They’re both terrible.

I love them.

Awful.

Paul complains of being bored, and yet she is bored doing the things he likes. They jab and jibe. He looks at another woman. They jab and jibe some more.

They’re bickering like they’re already married.

Get a room.

Terminate their relationship?

They bring up their attachment, again, always with the money. Kitty likes a man free of shame, Paul thinks he might lose her to a man who had even less. Hahahaha. You nerds. You’re in too deep and you both know it.

The Literal Worst has arrived. And he’s uglier than ever.

The Sphinx? That’s the name of this trash heap ballroom?

Hyde looks like a Tool. Barely two minutes on screen and he’s got the Creep Smirk going.

Hoes do not stand together, I see.

Paul and Kitty smiling at each other, having a grand old time. I love them.

Hyde showing his true colors already, by eyeing up Kitty, while dancing with another girl (though I’m pretty sure she’s a prostitute. Or just a woman who gets around, living off other men’s money). Wow, he also says some not-so-nice things to her before heading after Paul and Kitty, who’s having a hell of a time. Paul can also be a jackass –

“Don’t drink too much tonight, my darling.” She says it with such tenderness, while taking the glass from his hand.

“Cunning little kitty cat. Rather a dull husband than a drunken lover, eh?” Paul’s already slurring. He’s entered cad mode. Feel free to kick him to the curve, my dear. He deserves to nurse his hangover by himself.

She just looks disappointed.

Kitty’s creep alert is going off. Listen to it, honey. Run. Run, far away.

She’s trying to take Paul home.

Then going to dance with Hyde. Fuck. Kitty, listen to your Creep Radar.

Friendship with Kitty? Honey. No. Run. “Can I trust you?”

?? Kitty. No. Do not trust the creep.

Prostitute girl is back, claiming Hyde tried to force her, and some dude wants recompense. Kitty just wants to go home. Paul refuses to leave, to help Hyde.

Has common sense become a commodity that only Kitty is buying??

“Give the lady a few sovereigns, and there’ll be no trouble.” Yeah, sounds like a prostitute. Kitty bids them all goodnight. Paul looks sad to see her go. Should have thought about that before you acted the bastard.

Hyde tells them to go to hell and take the trollop with him. Dude dives at them, Paul knocks him out… And Hyde keeps hitting him. Paul stops him, telling him not to kill him, and then asks him if he’s ill.

“Let me alone, Jekyll. Let me alone.” Dumbass. Jekyll voice coming out of Hyde. That’s not creepy. Paul looks amused by the creep show. Hyde leaves the place, screaming, and being weird.

Lots of voice changing. This actor is actually really good. Jekyll realizes what he did, because Hyde says: “I will be back, Jekyll. I will return.”

Jekyll: “Never. Never.”

So he knows this was a bad idea?

Goes into Kitty’s room, whose reading, and she starts talking about her ‘party’. She wants to go to sleep. Jekyll still comes closer, being a creep. Creep Radar is blaring.

“I need you, Kitty. I need you desperately.” And he comes in, trying to kiss at her, mouthing at her neck. Like a creep. I know this is a parallel to later in the film (yeah, it’s terrible), when Hyde is in control, but I still hate this.

I had to pause during the next scene to do a deep character analysis –

Kitty pushes him off, telling him she’s tired, and even says “please”. As if she should have to beg him to keep his damn creep hands to himself. He still has a wild, crazy look in his eye, and asks: “What are you really like, Kitty?”

“I’m your wife, that’s all I am.” She answers it with such evenness, barely disturbed, and it reminds me of what Paul said to her –

“From perfect wife to perfect mistress, and back again to perfect wife.”

This movie has a lot to do with the masks we wear. We change them, depending on who we’re talking to: family, friends, strangers, lovers, etc. All the different relationships we have require a mask, shadowing the core of who we are, because letting someone see everything of ourselves is too terrifying to consider. We don’t show our true selves out of fear, pride, or some other convoluted mixture of emotions.

However, every mask has a basis, a template of origin.

I feel as if, at some point, Kitty really did love Jekyll. She must have. She married him not for his intelligence, not for his money, but because she genuinely loved him. Kitty loves too deeply, too strongly, and has all the hallmarks of a woman who has been burned by that depth of attachment.

“It’s my fault, a woman who shows her feelings always loses dignity.” Kitty says this during the first bit of the dance she has with Paul, which reveals so much of her character. She doesn’t look at him when she says it, the pain of her admittance is too much, and she shies away from anyone witnessing it. Even Paul.

Her relationship with Paul is strained right now. It’s weird. It seems like neither of them knows where it’s going, too afraid to continue, but even more horrified by the prospect of letting the other go.

When speaking of breaking their ‘arrangement’ (look up ‘affair’ in the dictionary), Kitty suggested Paul wouldn’t be able to get along financially without her. Paul rebuffed her, saying that Jekyll and he had been friends for years, and she was just his dutiful wife… despising him.

There’s an ease between them that feels years old, yet I doubt it was from the get-go of hers and Jekyll’s marriage. No, she probably did hate him quite a bit, in the beginning. But there’s a thin line between love and hate, one that can be crossed with loneliness. I like to think it was physical at first, a build up of tension between a woman caged in a house, and watching this man go out and spend her husband’s money.

It was probably Paul who convinced her to come out with him one evening. Fuck it. Jekyll wants to stay in his lab all night? Well, why should you stay too? Kitty probably said no at first. Why would she go out with this smarmy bastard, who gambles, who sleeps with anything that has legs, and drinks himself silly? But then there’s the wanting, the listening to her husband tinker away, watching life go by without her…

She probably went to Jekyll. She tried to talk to him, have dinner with her in the house that night. Without any servants, she’s learned to cook. He makes a point of trying to be nice but talks about his work… Always his work. She asks him to kiss her, as if that’s something she should have to nearly beg for. And what did he do? On the verge of some great breakthrough?

“Not right now, Kitty. I’m busy.”

Kitty, who is strong, vibrant, and beautiful, is not enough to stir a man from the wake of progress. From pride.

Humiliation and defeat, a loathing that breaks through love, stuffs her chest and nearly throttles her on the spot. Retreating, glassy eyed to her room. She probably cried, mourning her broken heart.

After that, she demands to go with Paul.

There’s probably a touch of shock, then a knowing smirk. He’s probably seen lots of women with husbands who ignore them, falling into his kind of life, dancing and drinking and laughing their nights away.

He’s not ready for this one.

Alright, hitting play again –

“But the woman inside of you, is that woman my wife?”

No. No, she’s not. She belongs with Paul.

Stop shaking her. She’s right. Get out.

Take your: “Who am I?”s and get the fuck out.

Cut to Paul being a cad again. Ugh. Go home to Kitty, you absolute tool bag.

He and Hyde are sitting at a table in The Sphinx with two bimbos. Wonderful.

Hyde is a creep. I will say that no less than ten times in this review. I probably already have.

The fuck is this?

They’re doing something weird.

Really weird.

A snake charmer dance.

Am I to assume they wish us to believe that snake is venomous?

Okay, to be fair, all snakes and spiders are venomous, but the potency of their venom varies in such a way that they effect most human bodies on different levels. I say ‘most’ because you can be allergic to something, and receive a far more harrowing experience than 98% of the population.

However, that does not excuse the fact that the creature in question is a ball python and is therefore basically harmless. Minus some swelling and bruising.

I had to pause to write that, okay, playing again –

Yeah, this poor animal is being abused by being forced into a ‘sensual dance’ with this woman. ‘Tigress’, they call her, kill me now. Paul says she’s exclusive to the elite. Kill me twice over. This dance is the worst. That poor snake is confused.

Paul is looking worriedly at Hyde as he stares, transfixed, at this woman. Dude, he wants to get bitch slapped, let him.

Christopher Lee’s eyebrows are doing things to me. Paul is the real eye candy in this shit show.

UGHASDKFJASDKFNAMSDKFJNASDKF

Jkljasdfklajsdklfansdkfnj

Klasjeirkmaskdfnjkasdjf

Klasdmfnkasndf

JKLASJDKLFNASKLDFNJ

UGH

SHE

SHE PUT

THE SNAAEK

HEAD

IN

MOTUH

WHY? WHY? WHY would –

WOULD uuo –

That poor animal.

Tell me that was fake.

She did not really put that poor creature’s head in her mouth.

This is abuse.

Not to mention, really gross. Salmonella, and a million other diseases could potentially exist on the skin of a reptile. Do not handle reptiles and then touch your face, or eat, or put any part of their body inside your mouth. Wash hands after handling, thank you.

Disgusting.

And people are clapping. And cheering.

Is this what passes for ‘exotic’ in the 1700s????

Maybe it’s my modern cynicism, but I am not impressed. I am shuddering in revulsion.

Mostly because of the snake in mouth bit.

Gods.

End me.

I’m about to shriek.

“Forget it, dear boy. She’s not in the prep-school class. Believe me, I’ve tried.”

Paul. Paul.

Have you ever considered:

She’s blind.

You’re gorgeous.

And you have a gorgeous woman waiting on you at home.

Why do you bother with the bimbos?

Girl on the right is pretty, okay, she’s like… an 8. Chick on the left is… also pretty, but like a 7.

Kitty is a damn 16, she blows them out of the water. There is no competition. When you’ve already had it all, why bother even looking at anything less? She gets bumped up to a 30 for the fact that she has a brain, she snarks, she jabs with the best of them, and is not afraid to leave you to your well-deserved hangover.

I will fight for Kitty’s honor.

Paul. I’m about to throw down.

He calls the dancer over – Maria – and I can already tell he’s going to –

Yep. Be a bastard.

“She only uses Christian names in bed.”

He deserved that drink to the face.

Even Hyde looks surprised. Then impressed.

Pft – HA! I have to quote this:

“Well, ladies, it seems that I must entertain you both.” He says, while soaked with what one can assume is scotch. “I trust that you will not be too disappointed.” Girl on the right looks like she expects to be disappointed. Ms. Left has her game face on.

“Oh, we’ll just have to manage.” Left is already up and at it.

“Somehow or other.” Right is playing along for now.

“Thank you for your confidence.” Paul’s reply does not sound confident in the slightest. He follows them through a curtain doorway. I’d say, ‘poor bastard’, but he doesn’t deserve my sympathy right now.

Hyde is creeping on Maria now.

“Keep away from him, he is dangerous.”

Yeah. To medium sized rodents.

Actually, considering Hyde is nothing more than a big, smelly, greasy, slimy rat –

Nah, wouldn’t want to give the poor thing indigestion.

“Your friend talked to me like a common whore.”

I assumed you two knew each other? I don’t know, they are weird and vague on that. Alan says he’s tried, then claims what names she uses in bed, and she did throw the drink on him afterwards. I’ve no idea.

I will give this to Hyde: He is a smooth talker. He is also, however, still a bastard.

And the makeup they used on this actress is not flattering at all. I’ve seen pictures of her, and she was beautiful. They somehow made her look hideous. ‘Impertinent’ is a word, though not quite the one I would use for this piece of garbage.

I love putting subtitles on. They’re so dumb.

(Soft sensual music) my ass.

Of course they shag. Why wouldn’t they?

She’s given him an in, now… “You do not buy, you do not beg.” A man who ‘takes’. No, do not give him that.

“A nice, cold wife.” I’m so furious.

They do have a servant! An old woman. Probably a concession after years.

“Mr. Hyde.” Creep.

‘Nanny’.

“Lately, this house has become unused to visitors.”

“The wife of a recluse…”

Trying to sweet talk a woman in love will not go over well for you.

Paul’s??? Paul’s friendship. What a save.

“The question of trespass hardly arises. Mr. Allen has no property rights in me.”

And as for Henry: “Henry leads his own life. He doesn’t seek my approval, and I don’t seek his. Is that wrong?”

OOOOOOFFFFF.

Sweet talk till you talk like that.

“To the boredom of being a neglected wife, and the humiliation of being a rejected mistress.”

It almost felt like she was into the flirting till he said that, but I still get the feeling she wouldn’t have slept with him. You can enjoy flirting, some people do it for a living, but not the act that comes after. As I said before, Kitty wears many masks. This one is short-lived. Hyde has insulted her, and the change in her demeanor is like a switch.

Kitty loves too deeply, to be reminded of her first failing, and the possibility of her loss of Paul is a kick in the teeth. Is she not worth loving? Is science, money, knowledge, other women – is she just no match? Can she have nothing out of this?

“I must say, you are honest. A trifle obvious, perhaps, but honest.” And too close to the surface, too close to the proverbial nail. Kitty is genuinely afraid of losing Paul, and it shows. She’s clinging onto something she feels she can’t hold onto, whether for her already damaged pride or because she doesn’t want to be hurt again. Her face only really started to shift when he said mistress.

“My great affair has already begun.” She’s pulling herself so easily from his arms. He talks about great love since he felt her in his arms, and she just turns away with this casual walk of a knowing woman.

“It was well advanced before ever you appeared on the scene.” She looks almost proud, though there’s still this edge to her. She expects it to crash and burn. She’s just waiting for it.

“I wonder what is the special quality in a man as weak, unscrupulous, and utterly unreliable as Paul Allen?” This really bothers him. Hyde is essentially Jekyll unchained, a copy of the inner, dark urges of one man laid bare, and given free run of the place… And he’s a total rat bastard.

And Kitty is smiling. Kitty is overjoyed.

“I don’t question your description, Mr. Hyde.” She’s radiating with delight. Even that description of Paul in all his awful glory stirs nothing but happiness in her.

“Well then, but why…” And he’s reaching for her, stroking his fingers over her back. It’s this odd mimicry of how Jekyll tried to hold her that night. Ugh.

“I merely happen to love him.” Yes! SHE SAID IT!

“Love? Love is an idiocy!” And she’s laughing again. I’m beginning to believe Kitty uses laughter to cover her pain. Hyde/Jekyll McShitFace uses rage.

“An idiocy of mine, perhaps, but a fact.” Then we get this beautiful close up of her face, the vindication with which she says it has me living –

“I love Paul Allen.” Love, you must be so blind and so wonderful.

(Ominous music). As Hyde descends back to his basement to turn back into Jekyll. Back to the sewer, your garbage monster.

Ernst is here. Okay, something weird is happening again. Jekyll has a heightened metabolism. Probably from sustaining two rat bastards instead of one. I’ve no idea how much time has elapsed, but quite a bit I’m guessing. A week? A month? Another year? Nah, probably more like a week or so.

Jekyll’s life is “burning out at a much faster rate.”

Kitty is fed up with being Paul’s ‘bank clerk’. Yeah, let’s bring Henry into this. ‘Let him deal with life’s little problems and leave us its gaiety’? You are a cad. Why do you love him again, Kitty? You can do better.

She’s sick of being used.

“How can you talk of our love in this way?” Love? Is this the first time you bring it up to her? While asking for money? Aklsjdfkasjdf

Men are annoying.

“You hypocrite!” Thank you.

Debts of honor, my pale ass.

He’s going to Henry.

Ernst knows he’s addicted to something. He says it’s more damning, whatever it is.

At least Paul is honest. Jekyll is being cold to him now. He knows about him and Kitty now. He goes back to his work desk. ‘Going away’. Right. Run.

Paul gets nothing. Notes something must be wrong with him.

Kitty is worried about Paul now.

And fuck – Jekyll is giving full power of his shit to Hyde. His estate, his money, his assets, everything goes to Hyde. This happened in the book, of course, but this completely cuts Kitty off as well.

Also, he even says he’s using Hyde to ‘learn all he can’. You pretty much know it all. Kitty, your wife, is in love with your ‘friend’, Paul. It’s not that hard. You’ve effectively been gaslighting them from the beginning.

“For do I want to return to a life of frustrated isolation and loveless misery?”

I.

I have…

So many problems with this statement alone.

You left your wife, even said it yourself, neglected. For years. So much so, that she’s alone as well. Of course she searched for something beyond you, when you chose to isolate yourself first… And you know what? I’m happy for Kitty, she found something, someone to love and love her in return. Is it perfect? No, but –

Anything and everything can be traced back to you, you sorry sack of literal shit. I’m about to lose it. He’s reaping what he’s sewn, and now he’s trying to escape it.

I’m so pissed off.

He drinks more stuff. Great. The return of The Literal Worst is upon us.

Wow… Never heard Christopher Lee say that before –

“Damn bad luck you’ve been having, I hear, Allen, old man.” Some man comments on the state of Paul’s life, which has gone to hell in a handbasket.

“Damn bad luck.” Paul’s agreement seems to taste as bad as the cigarette he’s smoking. I wonder how many are his, in that overflowing mound of ash and stumps, at the center of the table.

“Oh, well, luck’s a bitch, old boy.” Not sure that was a saying yet, but maybe this is the one that starts the trend.

“Oh, I shouldn’t think so.” Paul looking like he’d like to swallow down the rest of the decanter on the table, with Hyde being the creep that just walked in. “I’ve always had the best possible luck with bitches.”

I just about spit my tea. Not even kidding.

“Almost always, anyway.”

You’re terrible. Kitty should leave without either of you.

How is this review over 4K words? Who’s still reading this?

“Women aren’t a weakness they’re a recurrent necessity.” Paul. Paul. What are you doing?

‘Oldest mistress’.

Paul. You’re awful with money and it’s obvious.

They’re going to go out on the town. Like bastards. Hyde is The Literal Worst.

Snap shots of London’s underbelly during the 1700s… Brawling, lots of drinking and bad singing, and… smoking? Opium? Hooka? Who the fuck knows anymore.

Paul’s out. Hyde is doing the 100-yard Creep Stare.

Paul is out making debts again. ‘Honorable’ ones, at least.

Now he’s out of ideas. It’s been a week. He spent all that money – 5,000 in a week. Ouch. “But you, are a fool.” We agree on that. That is the only thing Hyde, and I will ever agree on.

“And I’ll try Kitty.”

Ha.

Haha.

You can see the wheels turning unpleasantly in Paul’s head. His brow is doing that furrowed thing when he’s confused.

���What the devil do you mean, Hyde?” You know what he means, you just don’t want him to go on. You’re hoping he doesn’t mean what you think he means.

“Well, that should be simple enough for even you to understand.” Again, insulting people while mixing in kind words, though his next ones are far from kind: “I am telling you to obtain your mistress for me.”

Paul is rising out of his chair. His brow is still doing that furrowed thing, but it has gotten even deeper. The rage is coming, a wave that was slow to foam, but quick to rise.

“You unspeakable devil.” There’s still some disbelief, but there’s no denying the shock.

Hyde is doing the creep laugh with a – “How very amusing.” Now you can see the anger, it’s chiseling its way into his features, hard and sharp.

“Paul Allen, breaker of every law in the moral code, is shocked into morality.”

Full blown: I’d punch the ever-living hell out of you. I’m about to.

“You vile, disgusting degenerate.” His lips are quivering. He’s barely holding it together.

“Be rational, my friend.” You’re pushing him far beyond ‘rational’. “I’m asking for the temporary loan of a proven adulteress, of whom you yourself have grown somewhat tired.”

First of all: fuck you. Second of all: Kitty already said he has no property rights to her.

“You go back to hell!” Paul. Punch. Him.

Oh… Wait… Yeah, he’d probably get in trouble for that. And then be sent to jail. And I doubt he wants to be in there while Kitty is out here with this lunatic. Yeah, running out before you lose it seems wise.

Still should have throttled him a bit.

Now what is The Literal Worst doing? Going back to the house…

And sneaking into Kitty’s room. You creep. I’ve never wished to jump through a television screen more.

They only have one servant, ‘Nanny’, is her name.

He’s blackmailing her. With Paul’s notes. Fuck. ‘Buy him back’.

She’s laughing. Yes, that is Kitty’s response to being uncomfortable.

“You utterly repel me.” YES! Go girl! She laughs as he storms out, tossing the notes away. Then she closes and locks the door, pressing her back to it. She was probably more than a little terrified.

Hyde assaults a homeless man, shoving him down, and steps over him. That was in the book… Then back to some cesspit that Paul showed him.

There’s something weird going on here with Hyde and this girl.

Cut to Kitty and Paul snuggling. And kissing. This is the quality content I came for. He’s wearing the same shirt from earlier… Which means he probably took a good long walk, had a small conniption, and then went straight to her.

“Why does love make us behave so hatefully to one another?” Yeah, well, Paul has been the terrible one here.

“Because we’re cowards, my darling. We want everything.” I’m not sure what Paul’s deal is, why he is the way he is… He could just be an ivy league guy who grew up, not knowing how to handle money, he might not come with as much baggage as the rest of them.

Why can’t they just be happy and cute?

Go away? Start a new life? Yeah, do that.

Right now.

Leave.

Before Jekyll McShitFace gets back.

Ah, they planned to mug Hyde, using the girl as a means to dupe him. Seems about right. Also deserved.

Ah, Kitty is leaving Jekyll. About bloody time. Also, the wrong time, considering the whole Hyde business.

Jekyll has destroyed his drugs, though admits that Hyde’s grip is too powerful. Right. As if Ernst didn’t warn you it was an addiction. “No degeneracy is low enough to satisfy him.” You mean you, right? Because, he is, after all, you.

The kids are back in the garden. This can only end well.

Oh, they’re leaving. Good…

Paul and Kitty are making out again. Good for them.

Jekyll shoved a kid. Bad for him.

Same little girl who’s always trying to give him flowers. Yeah, he’s losing it. Rushing back into lab to pen a last will and testament one can hope –

Nope, no such luck.

‘Exorcise him’. Right.

Handwriting switch. Interesting.

Paul admitting to Kitty he’s in trouble with Hyde.

If looks could kill.

Hyde lures them with an invitation from Jekyll, about their last evening together being ‘gay’.

Kitty doesn’t want to go, she’s frightened. Listen to your gut.

Paul wants to stay, because they think he’ll settle. Kitty agrees.

Fuck.

Cabaret. Ugh.

Someone get me out of here. Lots of underwear. This is painful.

Hyde making plans to meet with Maria before meeting with Paul and Kitty, who’s dressed for a funeral. Paul. Don’t. Go. Of course, he does.

Up to Maria’s room. Piss it.

More cabaret. I’ll hand it to you ladies; you can cartwheel and front flip. That is impressive. Also, I’m completely serious, because the amount of muscles it takes to do that are insane. Flexibility is also key. Congrats ladies.

Paul meets with Hyde.

“Surely we can keep Kitty out of this.” He knows something’s up and didn’t want to involve her. Smart, but also stupid.

“Hardly.” Hyde’s reply sets my teeth on edge.

Paul. Don’t go into that room. To meet him in private. Fuck me. Backwards. Paul.

A ball python. How dangerous. Paul. There’s a table right there. Squish the fucker. I mean, I’m against animal cruelty, but in the case of the story, that thing is supposed to be deadly. Squish. Squish. Otherwise, leave him the fudge alone and he’ll leave you alone.

Kitty… Don’t go with the creepy man. Listen to your Creep Radar.

Paul’s dead. Kitty doesn’t deserve this. Don’t –

I hate this. I hate this. Paul is literally dead in the other room.

I’m writing so much fix-it fic for this, you won’t believe.

This review is 18 pages long. If you’ve made it this far, may the gods have mercy on you, because my wrath at this point is endless.

Maria is in Jekyll’s house. He told her to go back to that house, put on Kitty’s clothes –

“The pattern of justice is complete.”

Rot. In. Hell.

Paul and Kitty deserved better. They deserved each other.

Kitty waking up, gods’ I hate this. She’s a wreck. Her hair, her clothes… You can tell she’s about to be sick. She’s barely holding it together. There’s a fucking note… A note leading her to the snake… She finds Paul dead. She’s already shellshocked. Out onto the balcony…

“Paul.” Her last word.

She plummets over the balcony, through the glass roof, and –

Cut to Maria saying: “I love you Edward.”

“I can’t love.” We can agree on two things. Those two things.

“I must be free.” Right before murdering Maria.

Jekyll finally takes back over, rightfully horrified, and runs back to his lab. With three corpses under his belt.

What an interesting mirror effect…

“Why must you destroy?”

“I must be free.”

Then we go back-and-forth, about who murdered, who revenged, and who was wronged. They weren’t in Hyde’s way, but Jekyll was. He doesn’t ‘feel’. Yeah, right…

Hyde is every dark, terrible impulse Jekyll has had, given life and form. His desire to be free, to run rampant, has been a desire of Jekyll’s since the beginning. Free the beast so he could kill it… Then proceeded to twist it to gaslight his wife, his friend, and everyone else. He was living a life, a lie, a sham. The desire for freedom from persecution for our desires, to be allowed to do what we want, when we want, without judgement has been an overarching theme in all of society. People are persecuted for what pronouns they want to use, for how they eat, how they dress, how they talk –

However, because Hyde is merely a reflection, one can assume his desire for freedom is mirrored in Jekyll’s continued desire for the same. Jekyll wants to continue to exist, so Hyde must desire to exist in turn. He’s still composed completely of Jekyll’s desires.

He says he doesn’t feel, yet there is a desperation, a fear in his voice when he says: “You must lose, Jekyll.” Because he’s afraid he won’t. He’s horrified by the idea of being trapped forever, of their relation being found out…

Cut to Inspector being on the case at The Sphinx.

Wow, a lady in gentleman’s clothing runs The Sphinx. Nice.

Jekyll trying to leave a letter to Ernst. Yeah, that’ll go over well. He calls a street cleaner over to take his note to Ernst, but of course, Hyde has to upset that plan.

Again, I give props to the actor for the massive amount of voice switching, and playing the ‘tortured’ scientist, and the King of the Creeps.

Hyde is about to kill this street cleaner. Mate, why did you come into this guy’s house to randomly move something for him? He shoots him in the back, of course…

The Inspector arrives! Not in time…

Hyde is about to torch the place. Of course he is.

He puts up a performance for the police, saying Jekyll is nuts… Whole place is on fire, with street cleaner acting as a sub-in for the body of Jekyll.

I swear, if this fucker gets away with this, I will riot.

Is nobody seeing the Creepiest Grin of the Century?

No, of course not, they’re trying to fight a raging fire.

And of course, there’s a court hearing over the whole thing. Jekyll went nuts. True. He was addicted to drugs. Also true, though it’s not any kind ever seen before. Sought vengeance for imagined slights. True again.

“Fortunate to have escaped – “

Screw you.

Death by suicide. If only.

Do not tell me this is how this movie ends.

“A fine man. A fine – “

Shut up Ernst.

“The higher man.” Shut your face hole, Hyde.

Jekyll is coming out.

“I must leave immediately.” Oh no, you don’t, you bastard.

“Help me.” Keep talking, Jekyll. Get out of there. Confess. You deserve it.

Lots of struggling here. Again, props to the actor.

Inspector, Ernst, and everyone are watching. Do it now, you bastard.

He turned back into Jekyll!

Finally! You did something useful!

He looks really old. Apparently being Hyde aged him decades.

You can still rot in hell.

“I have destroyed him.”

“And yourself, my poor friend.”

“Only I could destroy him.” Dramatic pause. “And I have.”

He’s arrested.

Abrupt Hammer Horror Ending.

Kitty and Paul deserved better.

This review is 20 pages long, over 6K words, and it took me 4 hours to get through it because I kept pausing and rewinding to quote.

You’re welcome.

[pi-cat000]

MSA: Shapeshifter/Werewolf AU

NOTE: So there is a ton of really good werewolf-Arthur stuff floating around and I love it. Here is one more. Also, I read this and got inspired. 

Summary: Werewolf-Arthur but Vivi and Lewis are shapeshifters. They all go out on the full moon Harry Potter style. Set pre-canon.

.

The sky is bright blue today. If the weather report is to be believed, it will remain clear for the next five nights. Perfect for camping. Everything is falling into place, and Arthur is feeling increasingly energised. There is an extra spring to his step uncommon for this time of the mouth. Even his Uncle Lance, who hovers, face creased into an almost permanent frown, can’t dampen his spirits.

Arthur shoves clothes into his bag, throwing a comment over his shoulder, “I’ll be fine. Mystery is supervising.”

“Mystery. Mystery ya friend’s dog. That Mystery?” His Uncle, leaning against the doorframe, scowls some more, sounding disgruntled. After so many years living with the man, Arthur knows that the irritation is just a poor disguise for worry. He pays it no mind, continuing to pack.  

“I think he is some form a Kitsune. You know, a Japanese fox spirit. He’s like Vivi, except, instead of pretending to be a human, he pretends to be a dog. Also, Mystery’s a few hundred years old, a whole lot more powerful, and he is super experienced when it comes to these things.”

“I don’t like it.”

Arthur sighs, lifting his stuffed duffle bag. His Uncle’s distrust of the Yukino family has been an ongoing source of tension this last week. Vivi’s dad had it out for him, some old prejudice about curses and bad luck, but Mystery has never seemed bothered by it.

“It’s either this or a night in the basement,” He reasons, twitching in discomfort at the thought of being stuck in the basement for another full moon. The idea is equally unattractive to his Uncle, who grimaces. Neither of them enjoys locking Arthur up for full moons. Especially now, when Arthur is older and more unpredictable, and there is a large iron cage involved. He hates that cage. Necessary for his Uncle’s safety, but unpleasant on all counts.

His Uncle relents, “I want ya to call every night when possible.”

Arthur hoists a tent up in his free hand with an ease born of supernatural strength. With the full moon tomorrow, the bleed between human and wolf is becoming increasingly pronounced, resulting in heightened senses and ability.

“If anything happens, even if it's bad, you come back, ya hear. I don’t give a shit about what ya do when you’re the wolf, you come back, and we’ll deal with it together like we always do.”

Arthur slips around his Uncle, heading for the front door and his waiting van. “Yes. I know. I will.”

“If I don’t hear from ya, I’m hiking out there to track ya down myself.”

The air is crisp — a beautiful day. Arthur strides out across the parking lot, relishing the feel of open space. The sprawling desert on either side of him beckons to him. ‘Run. Be free,’ his instincts tell him. The door to the front reception rattles in its frame, and his Uncle follows him outside.

“I’ll be fine. We’ve been planning this for ages. I’m even looking forward to it.” He turns, smiling despite ongoing misgivings. To look forward to a full moon is monumental. It is something entirely new for Arthur. Honesty, he’s still not sure how to deal with it and is almost waiting for it all to come crashing down around him. Surely, someone is about to jump out and inform him that this all a joke.

His Uncle hesitates on approach, torn for maybe a second before deflating. He steps up to put a hand on Arthur’s shoulder. The action takes a bit of stretching, due to Lance’s shorter statue.  

“I’m just worried about ya.”

“I know. I swear I won’t take any chances. This is going to work. Trust me.” It had to work because, as amazing as his Uncle is, he is still just a human-A human with a werewolf nephew who put themselves in danger every month. Arthur’s biggest fear is waking up one of these mornings to discover his Uncle dead by his hand.  

Thankfully, his Uncle nods in acceptance, reaching forward and pulling him down for a ruff hug. Arthur breaths in, scenting the familiar oil and grease mixed with tobacco underling the salami sandwich Lance ate for lunch yesterday. It’s a comforting scent. They separate, and Arthur steps away, swinging himself into the van, throwing his belongings into the back.

Lance walks to stand near the window, folding his arms once again.

“Don’t forget. Call. Every night.”

“I will,” Arthur answers, wavering before flipping the ignition and accelerating out of the lot. Vivi, living smack in the centre of town, is a half-hour drive from Kingsman Mechanics.

When he pulls up, the whole Yukino family is out on their porch. Vivi is having some disagreement with her father, her mum looks to be playing mediator, and the Yukino elder is idly tracking his approach. They make eye contact. Arthur sinks low in his seat, so he is mostly hidden from view. Just perfect. He’d been hoping to avoid drawing attention to himself.

While he waits, he deliberately ignores how the wards around Vivi’s house make his skin itchy and hair stand on end. Wards designed to deter creatures like him. The few times he had been invited in -on the rare occasion Vivi’s family are away- had left him with ringing ears and a clogged nose. The layers of illusion, plastered over the house’s plain exterior, coupled with the wards, play havoc with his senses. A common reaction when supernatural creatures encounter ‘fox magic,’ Vivi had tried to reassure.

Ten more minutes of arguing and Vivi throws her hands up in frustration, grabbing her bag and stomping up the garden path, visibly irritated. Over her head, Arthur catches the eye of her father, who is glaring daggers at the van. His eyes narrow, flashing blue. Arthur doesn’t need heightened instincts to recognise a warning sign. Internally, he groans, sinking further, putting his head below the window, resigning himself to another ‘stay away from my daughter or else’ lecture. So far, the ‘or else’ was impending, but Arthur can’t help but worry every time he accidentally reminds the patriarch that he exists. It throws a damper on his anticipation like a bucket of ice.

The passenger door opens. Mystery leaps up into the van, giving him a perplexed lopsided expression. Vivi clambers in after him, throwing her bag over the seat divider in the same movement. A puzzled glance is given when she notices him almost on the floor.

“Your dad hates me.” He offers.

“Oh, ignore him. He’s got his head stuck back in feudal japan,” Vivi gripes, twisting to pull down her seatbelt, “Right Mystery?”

Mystery, who has seated himself between them, nods, projecting his voice, /Though concern for one’s progeny is natural, the fact that I am acting as your guardian makes his worry unfounded. /

“See. Mystery agrees with me.”

“Is that what that was…” Arthur mutters, starting the van up so he can drive away as quickly as possible. He can still feel piercing blue eyes ten minutes later when the Pepper’s diner, in all its bright pink glory, appears on the horizon. Anxiety and fear are quickly killing the rest of his excited anticipation.  Now, he is wondering whether Vivi’s dad has a point.

“He’s right you know,” Arthur blurts, unable to help it, “Your dad I mean. About me being dangerous. I don’t even remember most full moons. I’ve ripped up all the basement floorboards and destroyed whole walls before.” He had even hurt people, back when he and his Uncle had lived in the city, but he can’t bring himself to mention that failing. “The full moon is nothing like when we’ve all gone running together or shifted to mess around. What if I hurt you.”

“Arthur,” Vivi sighs, turning to stare at his profile, “We’ve talked about this. There is no way we are letting you spend any more full moons locked up in that thing you keep in the basement. Not when we have a better option. My dad can go suck on a lemon, because, curse or not, I’m doing this.”

“What if something goes wrong and you regret it...”

“The only thing I regret is that we didn’t know you were a bitten-wolf sooner.”

Arthur hyper focuses on turning off the motorway, face heating up. Honesty, Arthur hadn’t known there was a difference between him and Lewis’s wolf nature until an offhand comment about werewolves had Lewis commenting that the full moon gave him a crazy appetite. Vivi’s dad had been by to threaten him enough times that he had assumed Vivi knew he was a werewolf and not a regular shifter, but she had simply nodded along with Lewis, asking if Arthur had a similar quirk. Then Arthur had been too embarrassed to correct them. The full moon was such an unpleasant experience for him that he had avoided talking about it for years, making excuse after excuse.

/To go on a hunt with one’s pack is a common strategy when dealing with lunar-madness — one of the reasons you wolves tend to congregate in one location. / Mystery adds, voice calmer.

“Exactly. You’ll have Lewis. You get along great when you shift. Also, I wouldn’t be much of a fox if I couldn’t keep up with you two bumbling lumps.”

“Lewis is a regular wolf, and you’re just so tiny. I could easily hurt one of you,” He objects.  

/Fear not, Arthur. In the unlikely event that you do not recognise your companions as part of your pack, I will intervein and keep you and them safe for the night’s duration. / Arthur eyes Mystery and exhales to release tension. Mystery was so good at masking his presence that sometimes Arthur forgot he was a crazy strong spirit. According to Vivi, her family had once been his vassals, actual foxes, before marrying into human lines. It was where she got her shifting ability and instinct for magic. Arthur’s not sure how Mystery ended up disguised as a dog, playing family guardian to a bloodline who were once his servants, but he’s not about to question it. If the supernatural world was anything, it was convoluted.

“Arthur.”

“What.”

They’d pulled into one of the vacant spots outside the Pepper's diner. Arthur realises he’s been sitting, staring at his lap, in silence. Vivi’s leaning over, waving to catch his attention. She smells like paper, grass, flowers and that electric undertone he associates with magic.

“Don’t let my dad get you down. This’ll be fun. I know I’m looking forward to camping, and the full moon is only one night.”

“Right. Yeah.” His dour mood falls away. Vivi’s eyes are sparking blue, signalling her enthusiasm. “You’re right.”

A knock on the van’s glass window has both him and Vivi twisting in their seats. Lewis waves from the other side and Vivi quickly winds the window down so she can call a greeting.

“Don’t suppose I could trouble you for a lift,” Lewis jokes, holding his thumb like he’s attempting to hitchhike.

“I don’t know. Where are you heading, stranger,” Vivi returns, leaning out to grin. Arthur feels a smile return, and he clicks off the locks so Vivi overbalances when Lewis tries the handle. It is the breakfast rush, so none of the other Peppers have joined Lewis outside- too busy serving customers- but Lewis has a giant portable cooler at his feet, which is probably packed with their cooking.

“Hey, Arthur. How are you holding up?”  Lewis meets, attention moving off Vivi. His eyes flash gold, catching the light, and Arthur gets that additional rush of excitement reuniting with Lewis always inspires. Vivi called it a ‘pack response,’ but Arthur’s not so sure, seeing as he feels the same way when he sees her. Vivi's not a wolf after all.

“I’m fine,” This isn’t his first full moon, so the concern is a little unnecessary. He still finds himself pleased to receive it though.

“There’s space in the back for that. Hold on. I’ll get the back doors.”

“Thanks. I brought an extra tent as well,” Lewis continues, tracking him as he circles around the vehicle to open the back.

Vivi sticks her head over the seat divider to watch them, commenting, “Because two tents aren’t enough.”

“You can never be too prepared.”

“We have space. Why not?” Arthur reasons, reordering his and Vivi’s stuff to give Lewis room to load up his cooler box and mound of additional camping supplies. Of the three of them, Lewis has definitely packed the lions share.

Then Lewis hands them all sandwiches, correctly guessing that no one has eaten breakfast, and they hit the road. While he and Viv eat, Lewis drives humming along to the radio. Thoughts of Vivi’s dad fade into the background, Arthur simply enjoying being in the presence of both his friends. Even Mystery, who tended to be more reserved, is joining in their conversation, seemingly looking forward to spending time hiking about in nature.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #93: This Beachhead Earth

November, 1971

Look at that little stern Vision. With his judgemental stare.

Maybe he’s angry I don’t love the rusty red background color dominating this cover.

I’m not sure why they did it. Couldn’t they have expanded the actual image to cover the cover? Its a good enough image to get someone to pick up the book. MAYBE THE AVENGERS FIGHT THE FANTASTIC FOUR or I guess maybe not whatever. Maybe the Avengers are trying to beat up the FF for that terrible testimony at that Witch Hunt hearing that happened last issue.

Also, this issue is twelve pages longer so this post will be longer than usual.

We start off with Vision barging into Avengers Mansion where Iron Man, Captain America, and Thor are hanging out. He asks for help and then collapses.

Dead.

Or not. He’s a robot and only one person present has the expertise to check Vision’s ‘life’signs.

No, not Tony Stark.

It’s Hank Pym, the Ant-Man! Yeah, he’s here too.

Even though he formally resigned his Avengers membership he came running when Iron Man called a meeting of the founding members + Captain America. And since Ant-Man was the founding member, Hank came in his Ant-Man outfit. Because that’s how Hank Pym makes decisions.

And its a good thing too. This particular situation calls for a Fantastic Journey of sorts that the Ant-Man powerset is better suited for than Giant-Man, Goliath, or Yellowjacket.

It’s also a happy coincidence that Hank is here at all. He’s the best person to examine Vision. He’s like his grandfather or something, depending on how you view robot parentage.

So its time for A JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE ANDROID!

And obviously the most scientific way is to just crawl right into Vision’s mouth. And he brings some ants with him.

And he immediately runs into Vision’s equivalent of an immune system. Tentacles that try to pull him into a chemical spray. One of the ants (possibly named Crosby) is TSSSSS’d before Ant-Man frees himself.

He then goes to free his two remaining ant associates and sends them out of the body. Some people don’t think ants are capable of pain but Hank has heard an ant scream. Apparently it sounds like lost souls in torment or the wailing of a forsaken child. It’s a sound that’s going to haunt him a lifetime.

But Ant-Man continues on with the help of his spiffy new jetpack. If Vision’s immune system is still working that proves that Vision is still alive. So something is wrong in his brain probably.

Hank is so distracted making jokes about Raquel Welch that he accidentally falls into the chest cavity. And a weird ol’ place it is.

As a synthezoid, Vision is supposed to contain analogues to virtually all human organs, brain, blood and tissue. Just, y’know, synthetic. And stronger, more durable, and more resilient.

But on an ant-scale, the insides of Vision do not look like the insides of a human.

For example, Hank finds energy vats full of energy bubbles. Some of the bubbles affect mass, others density. So the proper mixture from the vats is what allows Vision to pass through walls or become heavy enough to sink a battleship.

And while looking for a way up to the brain, one of the bubbles strikes Hank’s hand, making it intangible.

And while he’s waiting for that to wear off, another part of Vision’s immune system, a swarm of square metal plates, attack Hank and adhere to him.

He flees, jumping into one of the vats to become wholly intangible. This allows him to evade the plates and slip into a feeder tube leading up to the Vision’s brain.

But this fantastic voyage is filled with one hazard after another. Because the feeder tube does not have any oxygen. Luckily, he adapted his ant-helmet with an air mask.

AND UP THE TUBE HE GOES to the brain.

And while Hank babbles onto himself, making jokes, SCIENCE is racing through his brain. And he notices that in the synthezoid’s brain, the only thing that seems out of place is a loose wire. And as he plugs it in, he can only hope that it wasn’t disconnected by some automatic process.

But the brain hums back into activity.

Hank notices something weird but before he can figure out what it is, the swarm of plate antibodies come after him again. He has to flee out Vision’s nasal cavity.

And so ends this fantastic voyage. Weirdly just part two of this story when it could otherwise fill an issue of its own.

Ant-Man tells Cap, Iron Man, and Thor that he’d better skedaddle but the Vision should wake up any moment. He has to return to his research. Vital to human survival and all. But if the Avengers ever need a specialist, y’know for small and science stuff, he’ll be glad to help.

And as Hank Pym leaves (aboard Jeeves the ant), Vision awakes. And obviously after a near death experience, the first thing he wants to do is yell at the three Avengers for disbanding the team.

Thor protests that they never expelled the others. But obviously something is going on. The reason why Iron Man called this emergency meeting was because of a letter his *cough* employer Tony Stark received. A resignation letter from Jarvis.

So someone has played a monumental hoax on the Avengers. But who would benefit not only from getting the Avengers out of the way and have the ability to impersonate Thor, Iron Man, and Captain America? Who could have done this, in the Kree/Skrull War arc- oh. Ooooooooh.

Damn Skrulls.

But I get a little ahead of myself. Vision decides to tell the others what happened between this issue and the last, with a little recap thrown in.

After being ‘disbanded’ Goliath, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, and Vision decide to go visit the farm where Carol Danvers took Captain Marvel. Once there they can decide whether Mar-Vell should come to the H. Warren Craddock hearings the following day or not.

Oh, but since they were disbanded they couldn’t take a Quinjet. Scarlet Witch had to rent a car.

And when they get to the farm, there’s a no trespassing fence and Quicksilver gets a little territorial when Vision offers to help Wanda Witch over it.

So Vision flew off ahead to ponder about hate and prejudice and how suspicion of the Avengers made mutant distrustful of android instead of drawing them closer together.

And then he gets show down by cow lasers and crashes to the ground.

Huh.

Wait.

Cows?

Oh god. They aren’t cows, they’re the-

... Fantastic Four?

Huh.

Well, unfortunately, the Fantastic Three (no Sue) make short work of the outnumbered Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch. The cow lasers had disabled Vision so he couldn’t move. So he sank into the ground and floated off horizontally to look for help.

And just sort of floated across the state until he floated into the mansion where he burst in on Thor, Cap, and Iron Man. And that brings us back to Vision telling them this story.

And now that he has been repaired, Vision says he needs to return to help his fellow ex-Avengers. But this time, he’ll have Cap, Iron Man, and Thor. Because y’know what, identity theft is a serious crime.

And that brings us to PART THREE: WAR OF THE WEIRDS!

Yeah. Those Fantastic Four cows were actually Skrulls. And not just any Skrulls. The first Skrulls that attacked Earth.

The very ones that Reed Richards hypnotized into thinking they were cows. I could have sworn that they got turned into burger meat but I guess not. Anyway, while they were cowing it up, a Skrull craft in space used hyper beam and it was super-effective in making them remember who they were.

Oh and they have Carol Danvers and Captain Marvel prisoner.

Before they get into full gloat, proximity scanners locate Goliath so the Skrulls go out disguised as the Fantastic Three to beat them up.

Hey, that is a point. Weren’t there four Skrulls in the original invasion? Hm.

Anyway, Goliath meets up with Rick Jones but they’re both captured by the Fantastic Three. And Rick Jones can tell that they’re not the real deal because the Human Torch and the Thing don’t normally talk so good.

And then some Avengers show up.

Inside the Skrull ship, Captain Marvel enacts an escape attempt by bouncing a uni-beam blast off a reflective surface to destroy a power dampener.

With Carol’s prompting, Mar-Vell realizes that since he’s the only Kree on Earth, only he knows that the Skrulls are up to some no good here. Even though he’s an exile, he’s still a Kree. So he must warn them even though he’d rather go and aid the Avengers.

And in a nice little art gimmick, the story is split in half with Captain Marvel and Carol on the top of the page and the Avengers vs Fauxtastic Four on the bottom, separated by a computerized blastoff countdown.

Mar-Vell builds an omni-wave projector with scavenged parts and his uni-beam. The omni-wave projector is basically an ansible, capable of sending instantaneous messages to the Kree galaxy. But also, the most dangerous weapon in the cosmos if anyone other than the Kree get their hands on it.

Thankfully that will never happen, ha ha.

Because Mar-Vell just destroyed the omni-wave projector he built. BECAUSE CAROL DOES NOT KNOW HIS TRUE NAME IS MAR-VELL. So, this is not Carol.

ITS THE SUPER-SKRULL.

And Super-Skrull knocks Mar-Vell the hell out. Because, y’know, whatever. He has Mar-Vel and he has the mutants. That was his Earth checklist. And you know what, his fellow Skrulls are expendable. Time to leave.

And as the Avengers outside defeat the Fauxtastic Three, the farmhouse falls apart to reveal it was just a facade for the Skrull ship.

Goliath comes to just in time to grow and grab onto the ship. Because a highly advanced spaceship from an alien empire thousands of years old may be proofed against ethereal winds and the light storms of hyperspace but nobody ever thinks to proof spaceships against a giant punch fist.

And Goliath could have stopped the ship. Except he starts to shrink unexpectedly and falls from the craft. Clint realizes that he hasn’t taken a dose of the growth serum for days.

And as the Skrull ship blasts away, Thor catches not-so-Goliath out of the air.

Clint reacts badly. Probably an issue of injured pride, something he has to spare, but he takes offense to having to be rescued by Thor and carried around like a baby.

Actually, everyone feels bad. They got played for chumps by the Skrulls and three friends have been kidnapped. Well, they don’t know about Carol yet so call it four.

But between that and two powerful galaxy-spanning empires battling over Earth, Rick Jones wonders if this is the defeat the Avengers don’t come back from.

So part five of the Kree/Skrull War and we finally have some Kree and Skrulls warring. Earth has gotten involved as it always was going to. The Avengers are in trouble at home, seen as alien-sympathizers. Things are looking bad for the Avengers but good for the readers. All that and we got a Fantastic journey inside of an android?

A bit over halfway in and this is one of the better cosmic wars that the Avengers have gotten involved in. And they haven’t even gotten into space yet!

Next time: 20,000,000 years to Earth!

[jamesdazell]

A Brief History of the Life and Death of God

“Fear created the first gods in the world” said Statius a 1st Century AD Roman poet. "God is a superstition" from film There Will Be Blood. “God is dead” said Nietzsche “I count religion but a childish toy” wrote Christopher Marlowe We have all had that sensation of an overwhelming tremendous feeling that we quite know not want to do with. It feels like too much to handle, it feels to be so much more than what we are that we must be a recipient of it, not the author of it. There must be someone to credit for it. And so we psychologically project it outwards, we empty it into what seems like a vessel, something that can contain it, and we try to give it explanation in order to give it accountability. In so much as to ease the sensation, but also to manifest that sensation in to some kind of phenomenon. Seemingly at all costs not to attribute it to ourselves. But why should we not be the author of it? * We can often see bursts of projected overwhelming feelings whenever love is too much to bare. Whether the love for another person or love received by another. We are suspicious of a strong and powerful love. We want it subdued. Containable. Playful. Too much makes it heavy and serious, and only ends up giving us the blues. And yet we say “he/she loves me too much” as though it were a bad thing to love. And yet we cannot hate enough. People commonly cant deal with overwhelming feelings. Or say you’ve been hurt in a relationship and are distrusting of love. If you hated love, you'll never find it and you never enjoy it. If you said to yourself I'll never let myself get hurt again, you'd never fall in love again. Falling in love involves hurting. Bob Marley said everyone's gonna hurt you, you just gotta find the one's worth the pain. Similarly with life, if you tell yourself you're never gonna get hurt by life, then you're never gonna live. It's just part of it but how you deal with it is a whole other matter.  * Science likes to demean the past by suggesting that the ancient people were naive about the world that they live in, and that all the world was understood as magic and superstition. It wasn’t that ancient people thought floods, hurricanes, lightning storms, death of loved ones, insane victories in battle, were so inexplicable that they must be attributed to gods. It’s that the feelings they caused were so tremendous, whether fear, grief, or awe, that it was cast off and projected in to the attribution of something which could retain authorship. It was too much for them. Psychologically speaking, it is rational psychology. We still do this today. In the beginning of cognitive thought, what else would man do with his understanding of the sun that gives life to all things? Was he supposed to assume the systems of the cosmos, a helio-centric solar system, the universe? The very misunderstanding of it would cause enough awe to overwhelm him. Science is overtuning itself all the time. We are still to be seen as naive to some distant future. Even our smartest thoughts might to some future seem stupid. It may be that man’s stupidity, his non-intellectual primal characteristics, even his barbarism, might seem more interesting to a future that has forgotten them by its ever elevated esteem for intellectualism. That man’s irrationality might be also his primal nature. * God is not so much a matter of belief but of psychology. It’s the incapacity to retain authorship of those overwhelming feelings in the face of events that create gods. God is just a psychological discharge when experiencing powerful and overwhelming feelings that one feels incapable to absorb and attribute to oneself. The crudely term it “a mental ejaculation.” And it’s completely rational. Anyone is capable of doing this. This is done in the same sense with miracles, ghosts, and energy and other supernatural phenomena. When someone feels afraid and that fear becomes heightened, one can create all kinds of things, aliens at the window, bogeymen in the house, ghosts appearing, and all manner of creations that stem from the feeling that inspired them. Sensations which are projected, emptied, and attributed to ‘a cause.’  God is just the psychology of that psychological resignation, that self-denial, casting off the authorship of oneself to project on to something else, something larger, more inexplicable. Whatever was too great to comprehend and hold on to was thrown out in to whatever could hold on to it, as nevertheless the overwhelming feeling was present. One believes in God because one believes in the sensation. Because one is real, so he assumes is the other. * So baring in mind those two psychological traits: an incapacity to attribute overwhelming feelings to oneself, and a disposition towards life that one doesn't want to experience hurt. 

What is your psychological disposition towards life? That is the question. How much can you draw those sensations back in to yourself, and affirmatively attribute them to yourself? What does your character say about your relation to life and your value of the meaning of life. How affirmative are you with life? How much is life valued and venerated to you? How much capacity for life do you actually have? How in love with it, under all its terribleness, its profoundness, its awe, can you be? And how close to that scale can you measure yourself to be? In short, now that you are born and alive, how up to life are you? Truth, whatever it may be, denotes a character. Truth is relative to the character that would possess the appropriate motive for the truth to be discovered and valued in the first place. Nothing is absolutely true, everything true is makeup for a variety of psychological archetypes. Because behind any truth there is always motive. Not so much our relationship to truth, but a relationship with a goal that needs a whole string of truths, because they are the as the atoms that make up its ideal. There are some people, we have all met them, when you remove a truth they held so dear, it’s as if you’ve removed a piece of the Jenga block from the tower and its all about to fall down. They refute you because the system of truths would be otherwise broken down. That thing has to remain true for them. That is conviction. That is faith. - Always allow the freedom for truths to be overturns, never nail a truth down. Aristotle said that if two people value wholly different things they would never be friends because they would be the sum of wholly different values. Variety is more important than perfection. Everyone has their place. * This isn’t an actual history, but a swift overview of how things come to be. I’ll begin where what matters to us most: the God we’re most familiar with. In the ancient world gods were generally exchanged between cultures the more they interacted with each other. There are parallels from Europe to India and even to China in some respects regarding parallel gods. Certain gods were more popular than others. Usually some rites associated with the gods were more favourable than other gods because they represented some vitality in the culture. And by way of myth, word of mouth, ritual, and conquering other regions of the world, gods kind of of frequently got chewed up and exchanged, metamorphosing from one place to another under different names, epithets and symbols. One such parallel being the Egyptian god Osiris, the Greek Dionysus, the Indian Shiva, and to some degree certain devas in Buddhism because of its Hindu influence. (I mention Dionysos because it’s related to Christianity later on.) These secret Dionysian cult rituals (called Dionysus Mysteries) are traced back long before Archiac Greece and the name Dionysus has been found on tablets from regions outside of Greece at earlier periods. But in archiac times (10th-6th Century BCE) these rituals were only participated in by invitation and then initiation ceremonies (think somewhere between an illegal word of mouth rave party and the infamous scenes in the film Eyes Wide Shut) consisting of wine drinking, psychedelic drugs, sexual orgies, dancing, as well as eating meal from sacrificed animals such as rams as well as flagellation. The purpose of it being to return back to the primal version of ourselves, outside/beyond the contrained systematic formalities of civilized culture and society. In a sense to lose formal character by civilization and return to a kind of primal vitality, free of civlized code and rationality, and affirmative an animalistic nature that was deeply instinctive and the basis of vitality. Yet despite all this seemingly barbaric primitivism, if you tennis ball that back and forth between civilized society, it only ends up revitalising your intellectual formal character too. We have a smaller version of this when we break up the working work with the weekend fun. The pinnacle of this found its place in the invention of formal Western theatre by the Archaic Greeks in honour of Dionysus born out of ecstasy of the rituals. Greek Theatre, it doesn’t feel right to call these plays, were essentially equally music-poetry-spectacle performances where poetry, music, spectacle came together. It was affirming both the wild ecstatic state in its musical singing dancing choruses and its formalised character in its speaking characters. But more than that it was simultaneously showing the truth behind life that is hard to bare, masked and beautified by art of beautiful poetic speech, costume, theatre in order to handle experiencing it. I don’t think theatre is art, but a communicating medium for pure art: poetry, music, dance. The elements of theatre are technical crafts (acting, set design, costume, lighting, camera etc). Dionysus was the patron god of theatre because he was a transformative god, he would appear as different creatures, which paralleled the idea of becoming actors, and the ecstasy of dance and music. The creative spirit of art paralleled with the wild ecstatic state of the rituals. Dionysus essentially was a god of the intoxicated creative spirit. The audience would be given cups of wine and ivy leaves. The event would be more like a pop concert than the opera. * It’s that same creative spirit that created the entire pantheon of Greek gods.  God is not so much a matter of belief but psychology. Polytheistic religions should be understood differently than monotheistic religions. The pluralism of polytheism does not censor new gods, in fact it adopts them if it can enjoy them. Polytheism is self-affirmative, throwing created projections out on to the world again and again. It’s psychologically a more artistic spirit. And adversely to a monotheistic God, driven by fear. Polytheism is driven by gratitude. The Greek gods were created out of veneration of life. They had a god for every aspect of life. They venerated life so much they deified every aspect of it. * Running underneath these religions (perpetuated by nobility) there was a subterranean religion known as Judaism, this was a religion of the people, conversely to the religion of the nobles. Unlike the other mentioned religions, it was monotheistic - one God. Nevertheless, the artistic spirit is still there. The mythology of the Old Testament is full of so much grandeur that it rivals are the literary epics of the same era. Its full of profoundness. Not so much in its teaching but in its imagery. The imagery of the Genesis, Great Floods, Goliath, these stories only have the great ancient literary epics to compare with. Yet they were completely in the same literary fashion as the time. It’s not so much a distinction of religion but of the times. And if anyone has heard a Jewish shofar before, it’s one of the most beautiful sounds there is. * Towards the period of the Roman Republic (1BC) Rome was becoming unstable and and from the assassination of Julius Caesar fell in to civil wars. This ended with Rome’s first emperor Augustus. In this period there was a Jewish man named Jesus. Jesus lived his entire life in the Roman Empire under the reign of Augustus and later under Tiberius, between Galilee and Caparnaum until he was crucified in Jerusalem. Jesus’ ethical teaching was a continuation of the people’s religion values, basically both a more honest form of Judaism and criticism of the Roman values, which were his greatest oppression, and created an ethical teaching which subverted its values. Naturally he was crucified by Romans which was a typical form of punishment and wouldn’t have been done so in a manner which was particularly ceremonious. The myth of Jesus Christ is interesting though. Alhough I believe Jesus was a real person, the myth surrounding him is very similar to Dionysus of Greek myth. Note that depictions of the Devil are somewhat similar to the goat-hoofed tailed horn-head faun, satyr, followers of Dionysus. This probably came by way of two things. The cult of Dionysus developed and separated off in to the cult of Orpheus which was influences Pythagorism, which in turn influenced Plato, which in turn influenced Christianity. And Dionysus’ cults have flourished on and off in Roman culture under their equivalent god Bacchus. And with Dionysos being an antithesis of Christian values bodily acestism could ward off preference by the pagan Dionysus by having his image like the Devil and his myth narrative like Jesus Christ. So if anyone gravitated toward him they would be swerved to Christianity. But it also shows how powerfully significant Dionysus had been throughout archiac greek, roman, and christian society. The Romans borrowed their religion from the The Greeks and the Etruscans. The Greeks were much more positivistic, affirmative, celebratory, happier, gratuitous, and pluralistic in their religion. They were, simply in themselves, a description of a pleasure of life and a strong disposition towards it.  When we come to Christianity, this turns around into the subduing of all powerful feelings, whether sexual, egotistical, power, etc. Things which belonged quite naturally to an archaic Greek in general or Roman of nobility. The best of the Greeks and Romans were far too free in how they handled their gods to legitimately believe in them, but they clearly saw a useful for them, both personal and political, and they loved making new ones - as did the Egyptians. Not fear, but the use of festivities, that would unite the people and momentarily make their social place ambiguous. The Roman equivalent of Dionysos was Bacchus. The festivals to him were outlawed and reinstated on and off. Julius Caesar has reinstated them with support of Marc Anthony. The world had two people of a J.C. initials that would make or break history: Jesus Christ and Julius Caesar. Everything that Julius Caesar represents is sinful in Christianity. Everything Christianity represents is symbolises by the dead man on the cross. As people they are antithesis of each other. The very Roman spirit was antagonistic to it. And yet it was Rome that gave us Christianity. During the 1st Century BC Rome had several philosophical schools that would make it ripe for Christian seduction: Epicurianism, Neo-Platonism, and Stoicism. As the Roman Empire spread far and wide it was under rule of a triumvirate, (three rulers, divided up regionally) each wanted total control. Due to this amongst other instabilities the Roman Empire was falling apart. Emperor Constantine (3rd Century AD) was the one to discover a means. He was ruling over Britannica (now Britain) which although the Romans somewhat admired its former Druids (as the notebooks of Julius Caesar show), they considered Britannica a land of masses by comparison to Rome. And therefore more given to the people’s religion of Christianity. Constantine therefore knew that if he had the people he had the empire. He declared that he would unite the Roman Empire under Christianity and make it the official religion. He thereby managed to sway all the people under the Roman Empire on his side, taking control of the empire in all regions. Now Christianity was the religion of the Roman Empire and thereby the religion of Europe - because it was a means for imperial power. The Roman Empire had collapsed by the 6th Century AD. And the majority of Europe consisted of bloody wars, mostly in the name of Christianity supremacy and executing paganism. Although Europe had collected many Greek and Roman books ordered by such rulers like French ruler Charlamagne, King of the Franks (8th Century AD) as a desire to preserve educated society. In the 8th Century when Mohammed had founded Islam, Arabia had several religions such as Roman, Christianity, Judaism, and smaller tribal communities. It’s likely that Mohammed was a scholar and reformer of the Judeo-Christian teachings. The Qu'ran is certainly the best writing of the three Abrahamic Holy Books, and unless God was taking serious writing classes between his serial publications, then it’s the penmanship of a well read scholar/s. It was the Muslim scholars who still had most important ancient books - the philosophers, mathematicians, grammarians, histories, etc. In the 9th century the Arab empire expanded and came to North Africa and Southern Europe. They arrived to dried desert like southern Spain, and since their scientific achievements had flourished beyond Christian Europe, and they were familiar with that terrain they used irrigation to extract water from deep beneath the dried surface make it useful to build settlements. There were Jews and Christians there and they formed a kind of religious hierarchy where Jews, Christians and Muslims lived together. But it was their Persian culture, still Indian influenced and retaining some of its Roman culture to Europe in the form of energetic music, erotic poetry, and glorious architecture, that injected a revived European spirit. Even Italian Christian clergy commissioned Muslim architects to design Christian Churches. It was this technological interest that revived their interest in their own classical Roman architecture. It was he erotic poetry that gave Europe its love sonnets. And its music that gave Europe the Goliards, Troubadours, Trovere, and Trecento - possibly the greatest period of music Europe has ever had still to this date. The European Renaissance (French for rebirth) 12th Century to 16th Century AD was a re-discovered enthusiasm for not only the literature of the ancient world which in truth had never so much fallen out of fashion during the medieval dark ages, but the resurgance for its ancient values and spirit. The medieval period had to deal with constant brutal wars and the black death which swept Europe. Christianity was inevitably not sufficient enough a disposition towards life for these people. They needed more strength towards life as individuals. Something more resilient and less resigned, something more empowering of the self, which felt isolated and vulnerable against the calamities it faced. This would make the values re-discovered in ancient literature mean more than just the enjoyment of stories. But an affinity with its spirit and attitudes. But the Renaissance was not to be a long rebirth of ancient values. This was undone by firstly the Protestant Reformation that felt the Catholic Church had become corrupt by this new “paganism.” And the final nail in the coffin by Calvinism in the 17th Century AD - which essentially is the basis of the world we live in today. Our law, politics, economy, social morals, culture, etc The ancient people’s values versus ancient royal values. And that no matter what you want to believe about God does not change that we still live in God's world. 

Atheism has none of this creative energy. It doesn’t tackle the matter at all. Atheism isn’t affirmative, its negative.  Atheism is neither positivistic nor affirmative. Formal atheism is more denying than Christianity. Atheism is just Christianity without God. It’s the same subduing and reductive mode of thought but turned in on itself. Catholicism, to Protestantism, to Calvinism, to Atheism. If you’re going to be Atheistic you may as well be a Buddhist; it has no god but at least it’s positivistic. Buddhism aims to ward off suffering, doesn't account it as sin, but seeks to purge it as a kind of hygiene of life. As a cleanliness and contentedness. Nevertheless, its disposition towards life is positive, unlike the Abrahamic which put under the microscope is negativistic towards life. With Atheism it’s that same negation that Protestants removed the Pope that takes out God as mere denial of belief - the construct of what is Christianity in its spiritual and moral sense still remains. Christians believe in the same God as Jews and Muslims - and this framework that Atheists deny. It’s morality that belongs to Christians, and I don’t see Atheists having done much to overcome that. Athetism to me is only a new version of Christianity.  Catholicism, to Protestantism, to Calvinism, to Atheism.

Consequently Christianity has attempted on multiple occasions throughout history at pivotal moments to collapse the positive artistic spirit - as secular Christianity in the form of Romanticism, Decadent Art, Nihilistic Art - a creative spirit that is wholly unartistic, who only attempts to dramatise and express the suffering they experience but is wholly incapable of overcoming it and mastering or venerating it as real artists do, and thereby glorifying life - instead they use their suffering to create an art which throws disgust at life and praises weakness, dysfunction, and exhaustion. Jesus was never a Christian; only those who followed him. Or if he was then he was the only Christian. Christ is a man superior to Christianity and cannot belong to it. Out of his artistic-creative spirit he overturned every positive element of man and turned it in to a sin, and toppled every good and great statement of life ever spoken, thought or felt, to the degree that we don’t even associate ourselves with Greeks, Romans or Renaissance men.  I.e, a people who would be brave and confident in the face of life for its terrors and love life for its pleasures. As opposed to the lower class who would fear and despise its oppressive rulers for their lot in life (both noble and life would also mean bad) and find themselves no equivalent pleasures which the nobles enjoyed, thereby despising pleasures which were exclusive to nobles. Life would be weighed and valued with veneration by the ancient upper class whilst being weighed and valued with resentment by the ancient lower class. Why then didn’t the nobles later overthrow it is because, ancient noble literature and religion, as full of wisdom about the nature of life and values of action, prudence, heroic codes and all that that it was, it didn’t have the psychological internalisation of a human being that Christianity had, profoundly deep speculations of conscience and how they think and feel. The noble religions consisted of more action than thought, they just got on and did things; it was more codes of conduct, more outwardly looking at life. And they didn't have a noble internalisation until perhaps Renaissance Humanism. Principally in Machiavelli, Montaigne, and Shakespeare. And nowhere more so than France. The whole modern period in French philosophy (and theatre too) has been both a scepticism of Christianity and a kind of noble internalisation that the both Europe of their day and the ancient world lacked. Until then the western world lacked equivalent books of Royal perspective, world interpretation, heart and conscience. Why it's important was because it detailed all the affirmative qualities within us all. Things which are natural to life. It existed in nobles because they had to both fight and lead men in war, lead nations, and had the luxury and pleasures in life. In a sense they had the worst and the best of it. If it took a person of noble class to make it so be it. It's the mentality and disposition towards life that matters. That it was achieved at all is what matters. Religion denotes a psychological construct of character. * The Egyptians, Greeks, Etruscans, Hindus, Shinto, ans Romans were hugely artistic in creating gods and by their pluralistic religions everyone was given the door to be able to have an artistic spirit. Monotheism is censorship like a locked door. There is no room for self-assertion, it is in itself denying a self-assertiveness before God. The polytheistic door was always open to new gods. Theirs was a positivistic affirming self-assertive culture. And so gave everyone the self-assertive right over his own world to contribute to it. In fact it was this very liberty that brought the end to them: it was liberal enough to let Christianity in. How dull we are in comparison. Two thousand years and no new gods. How unartistic of us! What is higher than any religion we have ever had is simply that positivitic affirmative artistic spirit that went in to creating them in the first place.   In both the mythology of religion and the values of its morality, that artistic act of creativity of religions is superior to the religion itself. To create a religion requires huge creativity of creating values, perspectives on life, stories which hold them. All religions have built on the creative spirit, whether positive or negative, whether affirmative or nihilistic, and all have principally been born from a relationship towards pain, suffering, and death. Pain and suffering are intrinsic aspects of life. They are inevitable aspects of life. They are causes of overcoming, they are signs of it too, they are the very seeds of the future. Pain and suffering is the creative aspect of life. A sign of our growth. The it the artist overcomes it and creates the beautiful music, image, words, or dance. The artistic spirit venerates pain and suffering therefore they venerate life. The artistic spirit requires it. It’s these antagonisms which make it. Every Holy book on Earth has misunderstood this. Whoever worries and complains focuses on what is wrong, but a person who believes everything is right does neither and is content. Any future good owes itself to the day we meet bad things head on, therefore there is necessity in bad things that they justified the moment we strive to overcome them and make things better. It is antagonisms that make us. Bad things are justified by that it makes stronger and that we have cause to correct them. Everything bad is necessary. Everything that succeeds does so because it excels in some good in some way. *

Fear creates gods said Statius - fear created many things it seems. Fear of life, fear of pain, fear of suffering, fear of death - Fear is the very foundation of our religions. Fear in the face of life. In contrast, the artistic creative spirit of those antique artists (Greeks, Romans) more artists than religion was the cornerstone for a quintessential mentality of confidence in the face of all things and veneration of life as it is. The artistic psychology is superior to every religion ever conceived. Culture, if its artistic, is higher than religion and a better answer to the same problem. If i were to rank religions and culture i would like this: 2. Archaic Greek and Late Republican Roman culture 3. The culture of France and Japan 4. Venetian Italian in the time of Renaissance Humanism 5. Buddhism and Hinduism 6. Judaism (i put it higher cos it existed alongside the above religions and cultures without ever destroying them whereas the below didnt. And Jewish people always have a self-assertive ballsy audacious out-spoken temperament which Ive always liked) 7. Islam and Christianity 1 being some future leader culture that would show tolerance for them all and allow them a proper place without persecution within one society but according to its psychological rank. Believing that variety is more important than perfection. You may somehow get rid of religion but you can never get rid of the person it constitutes; they will always exist within society. Its more a matter of understanding it and finding its proper place. To take out that block from the Jenga tower. To remove God. What then? For the longest period of time people have pursued spiritual and moral goals, with religious founders as being their pinnacle of representation. If God is removed, then the whole spiritual and metaphysical mythology is removed? What then? If people have no need to purpose a moral ideal for the judgement of the next world? Genius is the only character throughout history that has every time being beneficial to themselves and everyone. They're not only fundamentally good, they are the best of men. I believe that genius, whether a Leonardo da Vinci, or an Albert Einstein whatever is the only example without exception of a person who is fundamentally beneficial for both themselves and for everybody. That looks to this life and this actual world for its goals and endeavours. And in its creation affirms its inner vitality. Taps in to some personal vitality peculiar to itself that it has developed as a resource from protracted struggle. A heightened faculty which it has nourished on in order to thrive. The deepest self-assertive affirmation. A true being what one is. And that perhaps genius is the only time when the human race is really on target to actual goals. They can seemingly create new order out of such a chaos. For them, the whole Jenga puzzle can fall down, because they’d just build something else. Like a kind of noble genius Dionysus.