#also out of all the bsd loyalists - aku to dazai; higuchi to aku; even poe to ranpo; hawthorne to mitchell

[note-boom]

I wonder if the reason Louisa is so desperate for orders comes less from a loyalty to Fitzgerald, though there is a personal element to it since he was the first to give her a reason, and more of a frustration with herself.

Becayse she's POWERFUL. Not her ability really, but the way she makes use of it. I honestly think she has a brain to rival Ranpo's and Dazai's in strategies, since most people believe THAT is what her ability is. Not to mention the hundreds of plans she made up, basing them on the actions of people she's BARELY met. And the way she just found Fitzgerald like that.

But no. Her ability is just slowing time so much that 10 minutes can be lengthened into 2 weeks. And in all that time, she writes strategies and plans, and through just those crumbs, we get to see how terrifying she is.

Despite her shyness, she knows the world well. She knows that it doesn't always go according to plan or predictions, that people are people and there are hundreds of ways a plan or strategy could fail. She approaches everything from every angle and her anxiety is turned to a strength because she can predict for the smallest of shifts to the plan.

And yet, I wonder if in all that slowed down time she thought to herself, what's the point. The point of her brilliant mind, her ability that leaves her alone to think by herself for as long as she wants.

Do you ever wonder if she slowed down time for so long that she lived entire years in mere days or weeks? Or that with her ability, she grew up faster but isolated, reading about the world and thinking and thinking and thinking?

She knows people, how unpredictable they can be, yet it scares her to interact with them. And she doesn't know what to DO. She has these insights, her mind, her ability....for what? Herself? Is there any point in living just for herself? (There could be, but because I think she's based off of Little Women's Beth, she wouldn't want that. Also all the time to herself that her ability gives her probably depresses her)

And so when Fitzgerald comes along - or maybe she strategized a plan and found him - she finally finds a reason for all the gifts she was given... Yes, she's using it for her benefit, but she's also using it to connect to the people she could understand but never reach out to. And I think it's a crime we can't see her more (we only are give tiny crumbs for the foreign authors and it's a shame, but I guess I get why Asagiri wants to focus on the Japanese authors more).

Anyway, thank you for coming to my Louisa May Alcott appreciation post. In the next post, I will talk about how Tachihara and Louisa seem to have parallel arcs in that they both could choose the life of a hero but go for crime instead -