#amywritesthings
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silver underground. | chapter 21
( Read on AO3 )
Pairing: levi ackerman x f!reader (attack on titan / shingeki no kyojin)
Word Count: 3.8k
Summary: day 163 - also know as the day your world changed
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI - mentions of violence, death, bloodshed; miscommunications; amnesia trope; angst af
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CHAPTER 21
Bergamot.
He smells like fresh dirt and home and bergamot.
A pair of arms cocoon around you, holding you in place. Cradling the back of your head, lifting it from touching the ground, is a strong palm.
Sounds of the outside world are muffled; distant.
Here all you can hear is the wild thumping of your heart, your blood strongly coursing through your veins.
I am alive.
I am alive.
I am alive.
The crash happened so fast—
Falling from the sky. Sliding across the forest floor. Rolling over and over and over—
Until your body stopped abruptly against a cushion of muscle.
When the dust cloud settles, when the fog fades into vapor, you open your eyes.
Shades of deep, vertical brown overtake your vision. It's so vibrant, familiar yet new. For what feels like hours you stare at a small bug, a speckled ladybug, crawling in circles until it decides to head north.
With each passing exhale your attention travels with it — up, up, up — when causation connects:
One of the mighty tree trunks of the forest broke this violent fall.
(But not just for you — he was the one to take the brunt of the damage.)
He...
When your lips part, your mouth is dry.
Constricted, confused lungs try for their very first breath.
Inhale.
Breathe.
Stay with me.
But that isn't your voice; not in your mind's eye.
Blurry images flash along your vision, sprinkling red, black, and silver against the brush and trees of the forest.
No matter how many times you blink, squeeze, tear up, the visuals scatter like materialized pins and needles.
They won't go away. They clip to your peripheral, forcing you to confront what's ahead.
Nothing is linear. Nothing is clear.
Nausea, relief, uncertainty, rage — these emotions assault your senses. Emotions. Mind.
It’s like waking up after a horrible dream.
One you’ve been kicking and screaming to leave the minute it started.
Let me out.
The freefall plays over and over, a never-ending loop of sickening weightlessness, without a means to jolt yourself awake.
Let me out, let me out, let me—
Something mirrors your heart beat and fractures in its own rhythm, pounding erratically against your chest.
Your heart still beats, but not as panicked — not as heavy — as this.
As... his.
Him — the one who broke your fall.
(Levi.)
Without thinking, your trembling hand rises past his ribcage, up his arm, to his fingers resting on your trembling shoulder.
Then you realize it isn't your body that's shaking.
It's Levi's.
Quivering like a leaf, gasping for breath as if he’s run a marathon.
He doesn’t move. He’s frozen in time, right where you left him.
(I’m sorry.)
Over and over, you replay precious seconds in the back of your mind — fractured memories you’ve only just begun to uncover.
Falling.
Darkness.
(James? James, shit, wake up—)
A voice crack.
Hopelessness.
Instinctively your arms surround him, as if dissolving him into your very pores will somehow help with the confusion in your gut.
Even when your fingers raise hire on your shoulder to glide along his, he doesn’t relax.
If anything, his ivory muscles forge into steel.
Prepared, like you’re the enemy.
They do not soften when your fingers curl, timid and experimental, around his hand for reassurance.
(Wake up.)
They do not yield when you exhale, slow and steady.
They do not rest when you squeeze, as if to offer a sign of life.
(Please, James, don’t do this to—)
“Levi.”
Two syllables — you murmur his very name, realizing the severity of all that you’ve missed.
The dampness of the Underground City right above your heads;
The heat of the sun on a riverbank of the surface;
The light of the morning, just outside an open window, glittering over a bare shoulder;
All puzzle pieces, scattered across a large table.
They fit together in a way — you just need to figure out where.
When you inch your face away from his body, you see it: those blue-gray eyes, pupils dilated and whites wide, staring straight through you.
(As though lost in another time, in the same nothingness you’d lost yourself in for months.)
His chest heaves in and out, trying to catch a breath that just won’t come.
Wretched, heavy gasps contain the fear.
The panic.
All while reliving, too.
“Levi?” you ask once more, softer this time.
A sharp battle cry sounds above your heads. You glance high to witness the silhouette of Petra flying through the canopy of trees with a trail of steam behind her, swords extended.
The titan has been defeated.
The forest floor quakes and shivers with its demise.
Except that isn’t how the mission happened last time.
The realization is a chilling thought creeping, infecting, the back of your mind as you return your attention to the captain in front of you.
“Levi.”
You urge firmer this time, but it’s no use.
Levi Ackerman continues to stare ahead, but he blinks. Rapid fire, as if trying to return to his body.
This face.
You gravitate towards this face that consumes every waking dream you’ve ever had.
Caging his face between your palms, you finally snap with a command.
“Levi, look at me.”
His gray eyes shoot down, catching yours, and your entire world feels warm again.
The light in a never-ending darkness.
Your past is your present and your present tumbles into your past.
An undiscovered constellation of points in your memory that haven’t quite lined up yet, but him…
All you know is that you have missed him, this incorrigible man, lying beside you.
And all this time, it is Levi Ackerman that holds the frame of the puzzle you have been trying to solve.
Instinctively your thumbs run along his cheekbones, causing his eyes to grow impossibly wider.
Unwise, perhaps, but the softened motion brings you comfort unlike anything else, tethering bits and pieces together in the mind by touch alone.
Bits and pieces, to bigger pictures —
You — a nobody from the Underground City, meant to die by the hands of greed and saved by ones of promise.
You — a formidable fighter, a friend, a colleague, a lover.
You — Lieutenant James, member of the Special Operations squad in the Survey Corps.
Maybe you don’t have the whole story yet, but whoever she is… whoever you are…
She’s supposed to be right here.
Levi’s eyes flutter over your face as if to search for injury or damage, but he doesn’t remove his arms from your body. The captain continues to cradle you as if you'll disappear, dissolve, into the mist that swallows your very waking daydreams.
So you lean closer, murmuring just under your breath with pure wonder.
Recognition.
“I know you.”
‘You know me.’
You recall standing right in front of him months ago, begging in a stable.
Those fateful few months before you really knew how close you were to the truth.
'You know me, but you won’t help me. Why?’
That doubt on his face, deeply ingrained in curbed expectations.
It's a memory you haven’t been able to shake, not since you awoke from the hospital.
Now it twists into something much darker.
‘Because you finally have an out.’
Profound sadness infects your stomach when one jagged edge aligns with another.
The memory, fresh as morning dew on a weed, sprouts before your very eyes.
Yes, you do know him.
Yes, he wouldn’t help you.
Because you’ve been down this road before.
But not like this.
Not wrapped up like two star crossed lovers.
(That’s why you hate me.)
— suddenly your back meets the ground.
A pair of hands abruptly push you, knocking you down to the forest floor with a whoosh of a small oof from your lungs.
Your eyes connect with the bright blue sky, the twinkling of green leaves, the expanse of a bird's wing flying high above.
I know this place.
Why can't you say it out loud?
In a hasty cloud of dust, Levi's boots keep up dirt as he scrambles off of you.
To steady himself, his pale palm presses to the tree trunk. He heaves once, twice, before exhaling fully.
Breath finally returns to his body. What once was pale now has color.
When you eventually turn your gaze to him, he glares directly at you, but it isn’t cruel.
Feral, maybe, and diluted in his own confusion, but not cruel.
(You’d never witnessed someone so beautiful in your life.)
In a new light, you finally see him — a mirror image of two worlds, old and new. Of what your body misses to its very core. Of what your mind wants to remember, to know as intimately as it once did.
Slowly you roll to your belly and push up with your arms. You draw up on one knee, your hand instinctively raising to graze your neck.
There.
The silver pendant, tiny and profound, remains intact.
The fall didn’t destroy it.
Immense relief floods your system, and your fingers cradle it like a lifeline.
'You don’t own anything. Now you do.'
That melodic baritone guides your ghost of a hand, adhering one more piece to the puzzle.
A fuller frame.
All you want to do is run to him, speak to him, hear his voice, but all you can do is watch as he cycles through the motions of getting his shit together.
Struggling through stages of anger, betrayal, relief, and longing —
Before addressing you as Captain Levi would.
Because he doesn’t know.
He didn’t hear.
(You didn't say.)
“Are you out of your mind?”
An ironic question, all things considered.
Your lips part to answer, but his finger raises to warn against that judgment.
A curtain of dark fringe hangs over his eyes, shoulders heaving.
“Direct insubordination against your superior,” he spits, but the edge to his voice is frayed.
He’s barely hanging on by mere threads. You want to knit them back together so badly.
“And endangering the entire squad–”
“Levi—"
“Oluo would have been fine, but you? You weren’t ready.”
Standing on both feet now, you ignore the dirt and debris on your white uniform and take a step forward in earnest.
“Levi, if you would just—”
“I didn’t ask you to speak, James.”
His bark is as cold as ice, causing you to stop your pleas right in their tracks.
Your own wide eyes stare at him as he reprimands you, seemingly unhinged by what has transpired.
Your mouth shuts into a thin line, willing yourself to hear him out.
To hear him.
Piece by piece, the image fills—
“Commander Erwin was wrong to put you back in the Scouts," Levi growls. It’s spoken as if to convince himself of that very truth. “Abandoning your horse, defying my orders, acting without any regard for your fellow squad mates—”
He seethes, a flicker of rage fluttering across his face.
“—the recklessness of your actions could have cost not only your life, but the lives of my squad.”
“Our squad,” you correct boldly without realizing you’ve said the words out loud.
Wrong answer. His anger only grows.
“My,” he corrects viciously, “squad. You are a—”
“—Lieutenant, which is practically the same rank as you,” you blurt with your own anger, the adrenaline flushed through your veins as newfound familiarity seeps into your veins. "The titles don't mean anything. It's just shit made up for people like us."
“Excuse me?” he growls, and you don’t let up.
“And I know Commander Erwin has always favored you more, but you only pull ahead of me by two goddamn months in the Scout Regiment,” you desperately rasp, the excitement too great, “so shut the hell up and listen to me, Levi Ackerman, because I know you.”
Exhaling your frustrations in heavy heaps, you refuse to cower.
There is no reason to fear this man. There never was.
"I know you," you repeat, defeated.
As if you've confessed at the foot of his altar.
Levi, despite all of his anger, turns his chin sideways with a growing bewilderment.
Now that you speak, you can see the dots connecting behind his very eyes.
All you can do is hope — all you have is hope.
When he doesn't say anything, you step forward and continue.
"This whole time. This entire time you've tried... you tried to shut me out because you knew that if you did, I'd walk away."
"What?" Finally, he speaks, but his voice drops with caution.
"You said you wouldn't shut me out."
"And I didn't."
"But you wanted to give me an out, right?" you remind. "That's what you told me the day in the stables at the cadet camp."
His teeth grit. "I told you—"
"That day, you agreed to give me a second chance, but you hoped I'd get too scared in the forest and run the other way. Except I've seen things and—"
That grit dies instantly. "Wait, seen things?"
"Yes, I've seen pieces, Levi," you admit. "Pieces."
"Of—?"
"Us. Of my life." Your fire dies. "Of our life."
His jaw clenches so hard that his teeth could shatter.
Your shoulders drop, defenseless. Your hand touches the back of your head, trying to feel for where you might have hit it on the ground back then.
"You ran from me in that hospital in Trost when I woke up. You saw I couldn't remember you right away, so you thought..."
A small laugh of relief exits your mouth before you can stop it.
There are so many black spots in your mind's eye, but…
His face paves the way.
Four hearts, staring up at a skyless night; now only two remain.
"Damn it, you really thought I would never remember you when you were my entire life."
Falling.
All you’ve ever done is fall.
On your back, as a child in those fighting rings in the Underground City.
On your side, struggling to learn the inner workings of stolen ODM gear while a rambunctious boy with ash-blonde hair laughs to the sky.
On your front, when two strong arms pulled you on top of him, lips crashed to yours.
Yet Levi always held out his hand and picked you up.
Now his fists are translucent, tight at his sides, as your eyes meet.
“And so you pushed me around in hopes that I'd leave you here," you conclude sadly, "all while you blamed yourself for the rest of your days for my mistake — right?”
It’s as if you’ve confessed you’re a titan in the flesh.
Levi staggers back, the clink of his ODM gear rattling as he moves.
His eyes flutter all over your face, studying, searching—
“What the hell are you saying?” the captain croaks, unlike himself.
He stares, clearly waiting for the final blow, like you hold his entire life in the palm of your hand.
Oluo and Petra are somewhere.
And wherever they are means Gunther and Eld are likely not far behind.
They’ll approach at any moment to regroup with the Captain.
But you need him to understand—
Levi's jaws clenches again; an overwhelming flurry of emotion settling on his tongue.
He looks two seconds away from detonating.
"What did you remember?" his voice cracks, the facade shattering. "Just say it, damn it, what the fuck did you remem—"
“James!”
The panicked voice of Oluo shouts from the sky.
Petra follows not long after, attaching to the base of the tree trunks to softly find a landing on her feet.
The rest of the squad follow suit, eyes wide.
“Whoa, are you alright?” Oluo repeats, rushing forward. “The hell just happened out there?”
“Her gear got caught,” Petra replies with equal urgency. “I saw it when Captain Levi took off after you two.”
“Her gear?!” Oluo yelps.
The two of them rush over while their hands reach out, swiping your emerald cloak up and away.
They duck their attention to the gear to assess the damage.
The ODM canisters don’t look particularly busted, but the wire dangles helplessly without its spike.
You note just how nervous everyone looks.
Because everyone knows the story, you realize deep in your belly.
The story where a member of the Levi Squad fought titans and got her gear stuck, resulting in a catastrophic head injury where her memories were no more.
The one where they nearly lost one of their elite, only to result in that woman becoming a completely blank slate.
Someone that they'll never get back.
Except she's screaming in your head, slamming against your skull.
I'm here! I'm here, don't you see? I'm still here!
Eld and Gunther quickly descend next, their feet pattering with the quickness towards where you stand.
The squad surrounds you with a million questions, checking your head should there be damage.
Petra even places a gentle hand on your heart, but it’s hammering.
Alive.
Levi says nothing, does nothing; his chin ducks to his emerald collar, allowing his squad to have their time.
“You scared the shit out of us,” Gunther admits with a sigh.
“The hell were you thinking?” Eld adds.
You sheepishly shake your head, eyes still attached to Levi. “I-I wasn’t—”
“I had it, James,” Oluo counters, cutting you off. “I had that titan. You didn’t need to go back for me and almost risk your damn life.”
“Hate to say it, but I agree with Oluo,” Petra replies with a soft sigh, before pulling you in for a small hug. Your arms remain lamely at your sides. “You didn't need to prove you were badass to us, alright? We know." She lets go. "How did you cut yourself loose?”
“She didn’t.”
Levi’s voice breaks through, stopping everyone in their tracks.
He turns on a heel away from the squad, head remaining in a bow, and walks in the direction they'd arrived from.
“I caught her.”
You note the changes in expressions on the rest of the squad's faces.
Recognition smooths over their tired lines, like the significance isn’t lost on them.
Suddenly they duck their chins, too, as if ashamed for gossiping.
Only you remain with your head up, eyes square on the captain.
He does not look your way.
“Outing’s over. We’ll just have to break Four Eyes’ heart and tell them we didn’t capture any of those bastards today.”
“But we didn’t even make it halfway through,” Eld starts, turning his boot towards the captain with surprise. “We can go further.”
"Wait, we managed to clear the forest?" you ask without thinking, causing Eld and Oluo to glance your way.
Oluo’s eyebrows slide high to his hairline.
Eld’s narrow to a point.
“It… was,” Eld slowly, carefully, explains, “but the mission you — the one that you — Wait.”
"People still made it to the other side after I fell?" you exhale.
They made it.
The Scouts managed to push to the end of the forest.
The mission wasn't all for nothing.
A flurry of confused relief floods your system, yet the squad looks at you with pure confusion.
“...none of us told her about the forest debrief from last year yet, did we?” Oluo inquires, pointing to Petra. “Hey, did you snitch?”
“Huh? Snitch?!” Petra yelps. “What the hell would I snitch about? It’s not like it's a secret to anyone here what went down.”
“Yeah, but she didn’t make it long enough to see the end of it,” Gunther replies, rubbing his chin between his thumb and index finger. “And we all agreed not to bring up said mission when she woke up until she was cleared by that doctor guy she saved.”
“Doctor?” you blurt under your breath, blinking. "That I...?"
That you saved…
Albeit foggy, you remember the other team that fateful day.
Miro squad.
There were so many names, so much chaos…
You struggle to remember the finer details, but there was someone named Rini.
An older man — or did he just look weatherworn from war?
Was it the same man from Trost?
“Wait. James.” Petra rounds you, searching your face with budding excitement. “Do you remember the last mission you were on? Is that why you’re—”
“I said the outing’s over.”
Levi's command bites off her question, and Petra falters.
“I already have one shithead disobeying instructions. Is this going to become a trend?”
The squad goes silent, turning to their captain.
“Get the damn horses back,” the captain growls. “We’ll reconvene as a group back at headquarters. That’s an order.”
“Yes, sir,” they all respond in unison.
One after the other, they offer a look of condolences to you before ascending to the skies.
Leaving Levi and yourself to remain.
In the back of your mind, you remember the odds.
Forty to eighty.
The screams of terror.
The urgency to fly through the trees.
A formation of horses…
A corner of the puzzle is complete.
Help me.
Why won’t you help me?
“Levi?” you start, and you see his face flinch at your tone. “Can we talk?”
“Not here,” he replies curtly.
“But—”
“I said not here,” he grunts, turning his chin to regard you over his shoulder. “I’m not doing this here.”
When his eyes meet yours, they soften.
Apologetic.
As if he’s teetering on the brink of giving up completely.
“Go back to your quarters,” he urges. “Clear your head. Figure out if…”
Did his voice just crack again?
You can’t help but gravitate towards his orbit, boots gently stepping closer.
“...figure out if you mean it,” he finishes, stronger now. “If you really do remember — any of this. We'll reconvene and debrief back at headquarters, but I told you: I'm not feeding you our memories. If you think you know me, then say it with your whole damn chest and hold nothing back."
His chin drops, his black fringe falling over his eyes.
You can't see what he's thinking, how he's feeling, but the way his voice turns to a whisper breaks your heart.
"I can’t keep up with these false hopes anymore.”
The necklace on your sternum burns.
Although you have a million questions, a thousand apologies, a dozen pleas, and very few certainties, you say one thing in return.
"Yes, sir."
You both stand in silence, awaiting the horses.
He stares at the ground.
You continue staring at him.
I know you.
You're the only certainty I have.
Once the rest of the squad arrives, you mount your horse and keep formation.
The sun bursts free.
There are no more trees clouding your vision.
Ahead there is an expanse of grass, reclaimed by time.
(A new start.)
Levi Squad returns to headquarters without a casualty in tow.
.
#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman fanfiction#snk fanfiction#aot fanfiction#aot fanfic#aot fic#attack on titan fanfiction#levi ackerman x you#levi ackerman x female reader#snk fanfic#snk fic#shingeki no kyoujin fanfiction#shingeki no kyojin fanfic#shingeki no kyojin fic#attack on titan fic#levi ackerman fanfic#levi ackerman fic#sliver underground#wip series#amywritesthings
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ok i'm late BUT YOU KNOW I GOTTA ASK ABOUT ENTANGLEMENTS, your halsin is out of this world
amy!!!! Thank you 🥺💕 I am late answering this but I wanted to have a blurb to share - I am excited for this one but the words aren’t fully wording yet.
It is Halsin x Reader, and the vibe will be fighting as foreplay + teasing (but soft) entangle vine bondage/edging
———
The pink of his tongue slides between his teeth, biting down a laugh. His voice dropping then, going smooth as honey.
“I know what you want.” He croons. His fingers tracing at your hip, slipping between the binding vines, “You cannot hide your eyes from me, my heart. You can have it, if you yield.”
Watching, with his clever gaze. For the hitch of your breath, the widening of your eyes. The slightest curl of embarrassment tempered by his knowing tone, the offer he dangles.
He mistakes your pause for hesitance - as if you were thinking over an answer, instead of marveling at your connection.
“Or shall I keep you like this? Tied up, until you beg?”
———
[wip ask game]
#thank you for asking about this one!! I am excited to work on it 💕#wips#halsin x reader#amywritesthings#saradika answers
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K for fanfic meme!
Hi Amy, thanks for the ask!!
K: What’s the angstiest idea you’ve ever come up with?
That's published — if we meet again, we shall smile (pairing: Erwin x Levi). It covers Midnight Sun, told from Levi's perspective - specifically looking into Levi's thoughts when making The Decision. Angst galore aplenty!
That said, I think my upcoming Postwar!Levi, We Mourned the Sea, story might top it. It deals with grief, survival's guilt and post-war trauma, AND it's also told from Levi's perspective - so let's just say it's an express ticket to the angst train from there 🫡
Thanks again for the ask, warm wishes to you x
Join me — Fanfic ask game
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Last Line WIP
Tagged by: @amywritesthings | Tagging: @caisjunlis @silver-and-shadow @matriarchcomputer @greenisms @xavierbunbun anyone else who follows me and is writing rn I'm sorry I don't have time to tag you but GO for it!
"Repost and add to it a line from your most recent WIP."
Girl I-. This WIP IS A MESSSSSS. Here's a small piece though that I'm excited to clean up. Just some messy character thoughts:
"Deep down, way deep down, the voice of reason that only showed up when he was almost asleep at night would speak to him.
This is dangerous. He's going to think you like her.
But I don't! He knows that.
No he doesn't, that's why he gets so worked up.
Well that's on him. If he was man enough he'd care more about stealing her away.
You need to back off.
I'm not doing anything wrong. We were way closer than this before.
And you miss that.
And as he starts to wane off to sleep, the beginnings of a seed in his heart begin to flitter.
I want her to be close to me again."
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♡ If you receive this you make somebody happy. Go and send this to ten bloggers who make you happy or somebody you think needs cheering up. If you get it back even better ♡
amy 🥹💕 thank you so much - sending this right back your way!!!
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....jealous mando, u say? 👀👀👀
Amy, the moment I typed that I knew you'd be into it.
So do we remember Grego? The handsome older gentleman in Good Company that sang out favorite girl a song? This story would have them meeting again and chatting while she waits for Mando.
Grego's an old flirt, was a regular at the Lively Bantha and always had his eye on her. Cue Mando, who now has to be polite, of all things, because she knows him. But once they get out of whatever cantina or hangar they've been in, Mando succumbs to some possessiveness. And she gets a filthy-talking semi-public railing so she never questions his feelings again.
I mean, can you imagine him just rolling up to a guy putting the moves on you and growling "let's go" before practically dragging you into an alley? Because I sure as hell can!
Thanks for playing Amy!
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Jasmine!
ILY AMY ❤️🥹🙌🏽
jasmine ⇢ do you have a movie or book you loved but will never watch/read again?
That's a good one! hmmmm
I don't know about movies, but book wise it would probably be The Kite Runner, and A Thousand Splendid Suns. Both beautiful, heartbreaking books, I read in highschool. Even though I read these before my s.a. happened, it would probably still trigger me to read them now after the fact. Half my family's side is Muslim as well, so its upsetting to read about how oppressive the Taliban regime was over women in the Middle East during that time, and how oppressive it still is to this day, and how Muslims are portrayed in the media in general.
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𝗙𝗘𝗕𝗥𝗨𝗔𝗥𝗬 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟰 𝗙𝗜𝗖 𝗥𝗘𝗖𝗦
༝༚༝༚ = Black/POC Works ⎢ 24’ Fic Rec M.List
ATTACK ON TITAN:
Multi-Character
Window Shopping (Connie Springer +. Ryomen Sukuna) — @chrollohearttags ༝༚༝༚
Threesome (Connie Springer + Onyankopon) — @merakidoll ༝༚༝༚
Tryna Threeway With His Roomie (Jean Kirstein + Connie Springer) — @honeybleed
On Valentine’s Day (Jean Kirstein +Porco Galliard) — @shepnicolo
Double Penetration (Reiner Braun + Zeke Jaeger) — @nekomacheercaptain
Double the Fun (Eren Jaeger + Reiner Braun) — @daisynik7
Drift King (Eren Jaeger + Ryomen Sukuna) — @s-sugustar ༝༚༝༚
Connie Springer
“Make It Fit”!Connie — @nysrage ༝༚༝༚
Midnight Snack — ^ ༝༚༝༚
Messages w/ Bestfriend!Connie — @morgluvsconnie ༝༚༝༚
When Connie First Saw You, He Knew You Were The One — ^ ༝༚༝༚
24/7 — @ayeyolooo ༝༚༝༚
He Fucks the Attitude Out of You — @kyunzin ༝༚༝༚
Let Me Get A Taste — ^ ༝༚༝༚
Connie Meets Y/N’s Doggy — @cindol ༝༚༝༚
Ears Pierced — @rissouu ༝༚༝༚
Some Help — @nininikki ༝༚༝༚
Soft Thug ⎢ Part 2 — @klipkillakai ༝༚༝༚
Forgotten — @spliffymae
Nobody Else, Nothing Else — @rrenzwrld ༝༚༝༚
Eren Jaeger (Yeager)
Happy Valentine’s Day, Daddy! — @merakidoll ༝༚༝༚
Jean Kirstein (Kirschtein)
Plug!Jean — @rissouu ༝༚༝༚
Texts w/ Plug!Jean — ^ ༝༚༝༚
I’m Thinkin’ Bout Wifin’ You — ^ ༝༚༝༚
Late Night Drives — @jeanboyjean
All Mine — @planeteroticaaa
The Way Things Go — @plutoccult
Someday — @kingkonoha
Jean Covering His Ears — @shunsuis
DILF!Jean — @jeankirsteinsgrlfrnd
Stupid Gifts and a New Milestone — @sleepingpillscosmos
Now Playing At The Video Store — @mochimooon
Onyankopon
4 Your Eyes Only — @nysrage ༝༚༝༚
The House Party — ^ ༝༚༝༚
Rollin’ To Love — ^ ༝༚༝༚
Just Me Loving You — @s-sugustar ༝༚༝༚
Mutuals — @anucalor ༝༚༝༚
Smutty Blurb — @katsukis-lilbunnywhore ༝༚༝༚
Reiner Braun
Tutoring Jock!Reiner — @mommypieck
Reiner Fucking Your Wrist — ^
Headpats, please? — @erwinsmithsmissingleftarm
NSFW Alphabet — ^
Eye Contact — @love-fictional-ppl
Gingerbread Sweet — @amywritesthings
Sugar Daddy Reiner — @agusrkive
BLEACH:
Multi-Character:
Bleach Men Taking Your Baby to the Grocery Store HCs (Kensei, Renji, Byakuya, Grimmjow, Ichigo) — @dreadsuitsamus
Byakuya Kuchiki
Bella Notte — @sashi-ya
Valentine’s Event — @actuallysaiyan
“Unwanted” Matrimony” — @tojiscumdumpster ༝༚༝༚
Renji Abarai
Knockout — @tojiscumdumpster ༝༚༝༚
THE GRAY MAN:
Court Gentry/Sierra Six
He a Creature — @ryanclutched
Alone Together — @ken-dom
NARUTO:
Multi-Character
“Thank you for the flowers” Prank (Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Kakashi) — @kingkonoha
Out of My Mind ⎢ Ch. 2 ⎢ Ch. 3 ⎢ Ch. 4 (Neji Hyuga + Shikamaru Nara) — @hyuganejiswife
Shikamaru Nara
One Night — @kingkonoha
Boy’s Night — @galaxychaos78
Kinktober Day 21: Squirting — @actuallysaiyan
Shikamaru w/ a Busty Reader HCs — @chocolatetheoristcloud
Night In — @jodrawssmut
Alone — @nanamimizz
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Char’s 2K fic rec List
Please do yourself a favour and check out these writers and their work. They are all amazing 🤩
Full masterlist
@misspearly1 Masterlist
@kteague Masterlist
@toomanystoriessolittletime Masterlist
@something-tofightfor Masterlist
@boliv-jenta Masterlist
@wardenparker Masterlist
@absurdthirst Masterlist
@forever-rogue Masterlist
@prolix-yuy Masterlist
@littlemisspascal Masterlist
@juletheghoul Masterlist
@wildemaven Masterlist
@oonajaeadira Masterlist
@albertasunrise Masterlist
@pedrito-friskito Masterlist
@scorpio-marionette Masterlist
@amywritesthings Masterlist
@mishasminion360 Masterlist
@musings-of-a-rose Masterlist
@icanbeyourjedi Masterlist
@frannyzooey Masterlist
@fuckyeahdindjarin Masterlist
@pedropascalsx Masterlist
@writer-darling Masterlist
Some more recs sent in by the lovely Chloe @misspearly1 Here
(I will keep adding throughout the month, my brain is not working this evening so I know for sure I’ve left someone out 🥰)
Also don’t forget my requests are open until Wednesday 15th so send some in 💕
#pedro pascal#joel miller x reader#dave york x reader#frankie morales x reader#marcus pike x f!reader#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x female reader#javier pena x female reader#pero tovar x f!reader
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- JOEL MILLER FIC RECS PART 2 -
forever in love with this grumpy old man <3 | note: please be aware of the authors’ warnings before reading. fics include canon tw’s like: violence, death, grief. most of these fics are age-gap relationship and some have 18+ content so minors please DNI.
part 1 | main masterlist
SERIES - MULTI-CHAPTERS
love in the middle of a fireflight | part 2 | part 3 • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @babydin
your bear | part 2 • joel miller x daughter!reader
↳ by @rrickgrrimes8 (very angsty, hurt/comfort)
a helping hand • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @teacupcollector
a lover's pinch • prof!joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @hier--soir (smut, au, angst, secret relationship)
i will be home for christmas • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @punkshort (no outbreak, fluff, smut, angst but happy ending, hurt/comfort)
lavender • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @justagalwhowrites
seeing you, seeing me • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @amywritesthings (slow burn, smut)
fate, after all • joel miller x f!oc!reader
↳ by @honeyedmiller (fluff, smut, no-outbreak)
ambush | part 2 • joel miller x reader
↳ by @huntergarrity (angst, violence, hurt/comfort)
seams • joel miller x reader
↳ by @fuckyeahdindjarin (self-conscious!joel, shy!reader, fluff, slow burn, explicit)
soft!joel collection • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @cavillscurls (smut, fluff, angst, soft and domestic!joel)
ONE-SHOTS - BLURBS - HC’S
daisy, give me an answer • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @dilf-din (fluff)
take this moment • joel miller x reader
↳ by @mylostloversbookmarks (post-outbreak, fluff)
ground me • joel miller x reader
↳ by @huntergarrity (fluff, comfort)
clouded judgement/clear mind • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @bluebeary-jay (violence, angst, hurt/comfort)
keep your eyes on me • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @mgparker (angst, violence, protective!joel)
daydreams • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @morning-star-joy (grumpy x sunshine, fluff)
i hope you are happy • joel miller x reader
↳ by @blissfulbarbie (very angsty, no outbreak)
grays • joel miller x reader
↳ by @softlyspector (domestic fluff, insecure!joel)
sweet creature • dad!joel miller x reader
↳ by @rocketrhap3000 (so fluffy)
lacy • joel miller x reader
↳ by @toxic-seduction (angst but happy ending)
bloodshed, crimson clover • joel miller x fem!doctor!reader
↳ by @morning-star-joy (slow burn, angst, violence)
arms tonite • joel miller x reader
↳ by @motherjoel (angst, reader gets hurt, happy ending)
skater • joel miller x platonic!gn!reader
↳ by @rrickgrrimes8 (angst, hurt/comfort, father figure!joel, tw: drowning)
be my daddy • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @bastardmandennis (no outbreak, smut, fluff, slightly angsty)
how the cookie crumbles • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @egcdeath (no outbreak, fake dating, slow burn, slight angst, fluff, idiots in love)
day after tomorrow • joel miller x reader
↳ by @familyvideostevie (no outbreak, fluff)
it’s your turn for choosing • joel miller x reader
↳ by @familyvideostevie (modern au, fluff)
i’m a feminist obviously • joel miller x reader
↳ by @toxic-seduction (protective!joel, violence)
softness • post outbreak!joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @joelsgreys (fluff, joel is a dad, tw: premature birth)
as long as i have you • jackson era!joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @beskarandblasters (very fluffy, slight angst)
sweetheart • post-outbreak!joel millet x fem!reader
↳ by @joels-shitty-puns (fluff, light angst)
are you mine? • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @eupheme (protective and soft!joel, fluff, light angst)
a forever thing • husband!joel miller x pregnant!wife!reader
↳ by @honeyedmiller (fluff)
the revenant wife • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @pettyprocrastination
butterfly • joel miller x black!latina!reader
↳ by @stargirlfics (angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, slow burn)
unlikely friends • joel miller x reader
↳ by @sweetercalypso (fluff)
mischief nights • joel miller x fem!reader
↳ by @jupiter-soups (fluff, slight angst)
all my casualties of love • joel miller x reader/oc
↳ by @agentmarcuspike (smut, grief)
a matter of timing • joel miller x baker!fem!reader
↳ by @lavenderursa (angst, smut, comfort, neighbours to lovers)
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x reader fluff#joel miller x reader angst#joel miller x reader smut#joel miller x platonic!reader#joel miller x y/n#joel miller x you#joel miller x oc#joel miller x original character#joel miller x pregnant reader#joel miller x wife!reader#joel miller#joel miller fic#the last of us hbo#the last of us fanfiction#the last of us#tlou#tlou fluff#joel miller x fem!reader#joel miller x gn!reader
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silver underground. / chapter 20.
( Read on AO3 )
Pairing: levi ackerman x f!reader (attack on titan / shingeki no kyojin)
Word Count: 6k
Summary: flashback ten - also known as the final mission
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI - graphic violence, minor character deaths, titan deaths, bloodshed, graphic depictions of injury, despair, peril
Previous Chapter. / Next Chapter. | Masterlist.
CHAPTER 20 - FLASHBACK: TEN
Eighty to forty.
Slashed in half.
On paper, the tactical statistics sound nothing short of a miracle.
In a division plagued by endless casualties, any hope of saving lives rather than destroying them should (and will) sanction blind approval from higher command.
For the commandant, for the king, for the people behind those Walls relying on this team to succeed in breaching the forest to pursue the mission of the Scout Regiment, it’s the best idea curated to date—
And it’s all thanks to Commander Erwin and his right-hand man, Captain Levi.
Levi Ackerman insists he can take on any Abnormal single-handedly.
Commander Erwin insists his Special Operations squad can and will find a way through the thick of it, once and for all.
A triumphant success for humanity, no matter the cost.
— but that was on paper.
When you wake, Levi isn’t beside you in your bed.
His disappearing act in the morning isn’t unusual nor is it disappointing.
By now you're used to waking up without him, though you only find yourself sleeping thanks to him.
(He's admitted that, if he doesn't slip out earlier than when you wake, then he may never leave.)
Although your relationship is the worst kept secret within the Special Ops squad, it’s still just that:
A secret.
What is not a secret, however, is the trajectory of what’s to come.
Not every day in the regiment is a nightmare, but this is the type of day the average cadet dreads when they pledge their allegiance to the Survey Corps.
So you ready for the day with noticeable weight on your shoulders.
A determination to see this through.
A promise to show up for your fellow man.
(An oath to Levi that the two of you will make it out of this alive and see another sunrise.)
Today will be brutal, but you can prevail.
Stepping out of your quarters in full Scout gear, you hear the whinnies and whines of nearing horses as they gallop toward headquarters.
You fix the collar of your cropped tan jacket in time with your footsteps descending down the stairwell, mind elsewhere.
Bodies hurry in and out of the open front door. Gear clinks. Blades sheath.
“Lieutenant James!”
That voice belongs to no soul you know.
You stop dead in your tracks right in front of the open double doors. Turning to the sunlight, you raise a hand to shield the rays to locate who may have spoken your name.
Before you stands an entirely new group of Scouts that you’ve never seen before. Fresh-faced and determined, if not a little terrified — there is a large array of them standing around in a semicircle at the mouth of headquarters.
All adorn the Wings of Freedom.
All press their fist backwards to their heart, denting the emblem.
You realize some of their faces look familiar.
Albeit it was a brief stint as a cadet in the training corps, recognition flutters over your face as you spy some of the hopefuls that slept not so far from your bunk in the barracks.
It's been years. What were once youthful faces now age well before their time.
“Lieutenant, sir!”
The one in the center, a short-haired woman with glasses, barks once more.
“We’re pleased to make your acquaintance and to serve under the command of Humanity’s Strongest.”
At first you say nothing, dazed at the sheer number of this squad.
Seven people hold steadily onto seven individual horses, their shoulders shrouded by emerald green cloaks. Some keep their hoods adorned to the crowns of their heads. Others bare their nervous but brave faces to you.
“At ease,” you murmur, and they lower their fists. “I wasn’t aware another squad was joining us this morning.”
“Miro Squad, sir, at your service,” the short-haired person greets, bowing. “I received Commander Erwin’s urgent letter for additional soldiers in the pursuit of breaching the forest.”
They take a half-step back and gestures to their team, pointing out every soul on their squad.
Miro, their leader; Trina, their second-in-command with wild fiery hair; and Scouts Orin, Max, Penelope, Cesca, and Rini.
Seven additional Scouts.
Fourteen Scouts in full for this Hail Mary of a mission.
Then it hits:
Proposing half of the original projected damage was bold, even for someone as shameless as Commander Erwin.
He had no qualms with setting this mission up with the new layout provided by Levi, ensuring as much of an air-tight plan as possible.
Eighty to forty percent is nothing short of a miracle.
But miracles do not exist in the Scouts.
Your stomach drops into the dirt with the sickening realization of what Commander Erwin’s grandiose solution really meant.
Miro Squad is the forty percent reduction.
A cruel and inhumane buffer of surefire casualties in order to keep the Special Ops squad intact during the breach.
You’re staring at a group of devoured bodies before you even reach the trees.
“It’s…”
You struggle with your words before slamming your backward fist to your heart, raising your chin.
Some of the younger Scouts stare in awe at your blatant display of honor.
“It’s wonderful to meet you, Miro Squad.”
You bow, though you feel dirty for doing so.
“I trust Commander Erwin made you aware of today’s efforts?”
Miro nods. “We intend to serve however we can.”
They don’t know.
They need to know.
They need to make an informed decision before—
“Lieutenant,” a deep voice sounds behind you, and your skin crawls.
Turning your chin, you stare eye to eye with the blue-eyed man boring down on you.
Commander Erwin appears somber.
Stoic.
“Yes, Commander?”
The question is small, but it drips with a knowing venom.
Erwin is not fazed. “Captain Levi is tending to the horses at the stables. Can you aid him in preparation before departure?”
To you, you conjure what appears to be a clear answer woven between the lines:
Do not interfere. Do not disobey.
You hold rank to an extent in the Scouts, but what the Commander says, goes.
Continuing to hold his icy blue stare, you try to convey the question you cannot say out loud.
(Do they know what is about to happen?)
Erwin continues to stare right back, not the least bit fazed by the conflict in your brow.
He is confident. He is headstrong.
An answer.
They're going to dedicate their hearts.
(Just like you, too, promised years ago.)
Without another word, you turn on a heel and beeline straight to the stables.
Anger.
Why do you feel so much anger?
Is it because the outcome feels bleak well before mission has started?
Are the odds truly this stacked against humanity?
When you reach the parted doors of the stables, he's there — Levi Ackerman stands in front of his black stallion, gliding a gentle hand down its muzzle.
He senses your presence well before you even say a word.
He turns easily to you, but his eyes sharpen a fraction when he picks up how pinched your shoulders are.
“James,” he greets neutrally, brow knitting. “What’s—”
“Miro Squad just showed up.”
“Who?”
“Don’t play dumb,” you snip, making your way to your own horse — she has a white coat with speckled gray spots all along her body.
She makes a small chortle noise when you near and you serve your flattened palm to her for a nuzzle.
(Behind the pen doors, you note she already has her gear in place. Levi must have already saddled her up for you while you were getting ready.)
The dark-haired man to your left sighs in a huff.
“Not playing dumb, James. I was genuinely asking.”
“It’s the squad Erwin’s setting up for slaughter,” you decide to elaborate hotly.
A pause passes.
You don't turn to see Levi's expression, but you can sense how tense the space between the two of you has become.
“If it’s Miro Squad he called to action, then they’ve fared well in comparison to the other squadrons," he argues with little fire. "Did he personally request them?"
"Allegedly."
"Allegedly?" Levi repeats, sharper in tone. "Either he did or he didn't."
"According to Miro, yes, he sent an urgent letter requesting aid."
Finally you turn a cheek towards him, forcing your eyes to meet.
You know that look he gives you sidelong.
Don’t start.
(Neither of you need to fight again, not before this mission.)
"Then Erwin didn't pick a random crop of Scouts to shit the bed and die on us," Levi reasons, softer. Conspiratorial. "I know you think he’s a bastard, but—”
“Worst case scenario,” you interrupt, “at least his Special Ops team won’t die?”
“If my strategy goes well, then no one dies." He counters with the certainty that’s entirely Levi. “You forget my name is on the damn ledger, too, unless this is you trying to tell me something.”
White-hot embarrassment courses your veins as your childhood friend waits for you to challenge his statement — to call him an equal-part premeditated murderer sat right beside the commander.
You can’t.
You won’t.
Instead you cool off by slowly petting your horse, willing your bad feeling to wither away.
After a moment, Levi wills his voice to soften again. “We need as many Scouts as we can—”
“I know.”
“—and even then, if we all kick the bucket, it's on me."
Levi finishes with a heavy sigh. He turns away, dropping his chin to his chest.
“I'll take whatever punishment fits the crime if it goes to shit."
A beat passes.
Blinking several times, you turn your body to him and drop the attitude.
“...and I'll do everything in my power to make sure we stay alive," you whisper softly. "That everyone comes home."
Levi’s head hangs, cascading his wispy black hair as a curtain over his face.
“That's not supposed to be your burden."
"Where you go, I go, remember?" you tell him. "For better or worse, I don't care."
"Wanna workshop vows, huh?" he mumbles. "Right now?"
This seems to ease the air about the stables.
Centimeter by centimeter, twin pairs of shoulders release in their tension.
You can't help but smile, even if the moment is tense.
"I think the Commander would find the dramatics funny."
"Oh, sure, proposing to your ass right before the single-biggest mission in Scout history would really tickle his funny bone," he sarcastically replies.
"It'd sure tickle Hange's."
"Hange doesn't need more ammunition, not after catching our asses that one time—"
"That one time that was your fault, you mean?" You grin as he glares. Still, his scowl is playful. "Loud Mouth Ackerman—"
"Shut up, Lieutenant."
Levi lets go of his horse and raises his hand, palm outstretched.
“Get the hell over here before anyone catches us a second time, alright?”
Albeit small, he smiles.
It's forced, like he wants to remember this — to focus on this.
The final moments before the point of no return.
Like a moth to a flame, you step away from your horse to step towards the short, dark-haired man.
Once you’re close enough, he pulls you in from the nape of your neck and drags your forehead to his, pressing them together.
His eyes squeeze shut.
You stare, memorizing his face.
“I love you,” he murmurs. “Don’t die.”
All the anger in your body melts away.
“I love you, too,” you reply just as softly. “I won’t—”
The stable door creaks.
You leap off of the captain to pretend like you’re picking up the bucket of water at his boots.
Levi stays put, dropping his arm like dead weight.
“Captain. Lieutenant.”
You don’t need to see the face to know it’s Erwin’s voice echoing through the stables.
“It’s time to move out.”
You both reply in unison, two different octaves.
“Yes, sir.”
.
.
.
.
.
The formation is simple:
Captain Levi leads the charge into the forbidden forest with Lieutenant James at his side.
Behind them in a diamond formation are the Special Operation Scouts Petra, Oluo, Gunther, and Eld.
Command Erwin, Section Commander Hange, and Moblit remain at headquarters for the recon and debrief.
At the rear of the formation are Miro Squad to specifically call out nearing and flanking titans that the first squad may miss.
They shadow the Special Operations unit as back-ups, no matter the cost.
And at first? It's easy.
Deceiving easy.
The mouth of the forest gives little trouble.
Both squadrons of Scouts breach the thick grove of towering trees without incident.
Thirty minutes into this mission, in the belly of this beast, not a single Abnormal has been spotted.
There aren't any typical titans, either.
It’s quiet.
Serene.
“Alright, listen up!”
With his hands tightly wound around leather reigns, Captain Levi finally calls to the Scouts behind him.
“Keep your eyes peeled. Abnormals do not move like other titans. These shitheads can be fast and appear at a moment’s notice.”
“Right!” Several of the Miro squad shouts back.
The Special Operations squad is too focused to reply.
Whenever you glance over at Levi, he’s smooth as stone.
He refuses to allow any emotion cloud his judgment on a mission, and you can imagine it won’t be any different this go-around.
Because this mission cannot fail.
The Scouts must push forward, no matter the cost.
(Even if the irrevocable cost makes you sick to your stomach.)
The sun shines bright over a canopy of trees.
Your cloak is too warm in this type of weather.
As you push further into the thick of the terrain, nearing what is assumed to be the halfway point of the forest, birds chirp less and less.
Eerie silence overtakes the pounding of hooves into the dirt.
Then, as fast as an inhale, you see it:
Directly ahead trudges a nine-meter titan, peering around a thick tree trunk.
"Captain!" Gunther shouts. "Ahead at our twelve!"
"I see the piece of shit," Levi calls back. "We keep moving. I'll take care of it."
You don't doubt that he will.
As it continues to slowly advance on your formation, you can tell the team is a little more tense.
Ready —
Except no one was prepared, not really.
The titan ahead is an army of one, but it is not the only titan here.
It was just the only one right in front of you.
Behind you sounds a scream so bloodcurdling that you nearly lock up on your horse.
You turn despite yourself.
Within seconds, you see Max get ripped clear off of his horse with the sheer force of otherworldly strength.
(...a hand?)
Then, a gust of wind sweeps and swirls the dirt into a lackluster tornado.
His horse narrowly escapes.
It rolls over and over, kicking up a thick dust cloud.
Max speeds through the air at breakneck speed like a human arrow —
Until he abruptly crashes into a thick tree trunk, dislocating his spine from his head.
The crunch is like ripping a stalk of ripe lettuce in half.
He simply crumples against the tree, limbs peacefully blowing in the wind like a leaf.
His Scout cloak billows over his shocked face, forever frozen in belated surprise.
Gone.
Just like that.
Then from the shadows, as if waiting for its prey, a five-meter titan stumbles around a tree to chomp on the recently deceased body.
It gnaws off his legs as they dangle in the air, spattering blood all over the forest floor.
Your horse gallops on.
You can't look away.
Then someone screams, forcing your eyes to rip away from the horror.
“Cesca!” A blonde girl shrieks to the right of the formation — Penelope, you think her name is. “Don’t!”
“It's devouring him!” Cesca wails at the top of her lungs. “We have to go back for him!”
“He’s already dead!” Trina calls with experienced calm. “There's no use, soldiers! Keep your eyes forward. We keep moving!”
“James—”
Your head turns when Levi calls to you.
Wide eyes meet a narrowed gaze.
“—that means you, too.”
Your eyes round with the realization that everything is happening so fast yet moving in slow motion.
What was that thing?
Was that a... ?
You were so busy watching Max get eaten that you didn’t realize three more titans appeared on the northeast corner, awakened by the screams of Miro Squad.
Shit.
This isn’t good.
This is not good.
“Levi,” you begin slowly, but he shakes his head.
"Don't hesitate. We push forward no matter what."
He's right.
Max is dead.
You just have to hope the rest of Miro squad keeps their wits about them.
You turn your head to make eye contact with Miro.
“Faster!”
“Roger, Lieutenant,” Miro tells you before shouting to their team. “Keep going, Scouts! We should be halfway through the clearing.”
“Miro,” Trina alerts them sharply, "three more titans are crowding from the right."
“Shit, what does that make it now? Seven of them!?” Miro hisses.
(Seven?)
Your eyes connect with Petra who appears equal parts shocked at just how quickly this mission has dissolved.
“I— there's a whole bunch of them in the back!”
Penelope calls frantically, staring behind her.
"They're surrounding us!"
Three to the east.
Another three to the northwest.
A couple to the south, and another...
Something entirely unlike anything you'd ever seen before.
“Captain, we’re going to need to ditch the horses,” you tell Levi in a hushed voice.
“Not yet,” he replies, smooth and certain.
“Not yet?" you repeat. "Levi, we have an entire army of goddamn titans on our—”
“I said not yet,” he coolly bites. “I’ll handle them.”
You know he will.
You just don’t want him to go up against them on his own.
Suddenly someone from the right side of the formation ignites their ODM gear, and they swoop overhead.
Blonde hair whooshes straight by the team and into the forest thick.
Penelope is the first to pull the trigger.
“I’m gonna get ahead of the curve and attack!” she calls, zipping through the trees towards some of the smaller titans.
Levi says nothing, but Miro shouts to their own squad:
“That wasn’t the plan! Damn it, Penelope!”
Her body rounds one of the tree trunks and heads right, disappearing.
Say something.
Say anything.
If that thing that killed Max is how an Abnormal moves, then Penelope doesn't stand a chance on her own.
You speak to him again. "Captain—”
“Not yet, James.”
“Penelope is going to get killed!” you argue, your grip on the reigns tightening.
“That’s the choice she made,” Captain Levi argues in return, sounding a little too much like Commander Erwin in the moment. “Remain steady and wait for my signal.”
Twigs fold and crackle under new weight to your right.
Then a thud shakes the straight through the horses and into you.
Penelope must have taken down at least one normal titan.
“Captain!”
Miro shouts in the middle of the squad.
“Should we engage? My squad can take care of the titans and carve a path forward!”
There is a tense, pregnant pause.
Everyone waits for Levi's instruction.
Two smaller titans walk directly towards the horses.
The dark-haired man's nostrils flare with decision.
“I’m going to take down the two ahead,” Levi shouts, effortlessly swinging a boot to the saddle of his horse.
With the muscles of his thigh he pushes until both boots are surfing against his running horse.
His black hair blows wildly in the wind. Like a well-oiled machine, he pushes back his cloaks to reveal his ODM gear, readying for deployment.
"Miro, take your squad and eliminate the enemies flanking us. You can come back to us once you're finished."
“What about the rest of us, sir?” calls Oluo.
Levi’s eyes narrow at the enemies ahead.
“My squad will keep the horses going. We need to make it to the end of this forest, for humanity's sake."
"And Captain, what about Penelope?" you quickly ask.
"She's a lost cause, Lieutenant."
He speaks with that coldness he's been forced to adopt ever since your days in the Underground.
"We can't go back for her."
You turn to watch as Miro squad disengages formation and turns around, charging bravely towards the crowd of titans forming behind.
An array of shapes and sizes await their swords.
(Or their flesh.)
Any minute now and it could be a bloodbath.
Any minute—
Levi flies off of his horse, trapezing through the trees.
A gas trail from how hard his gear is working is your only indicator for where he is at such a height.
He twirls with the shine of his unsheathed swords, slashing the napes of the two large titans ahead.
A victory.
Except it's a short-lived victory, because you hear it behind you—
Miro squad.
They're in trouble.
Even from this distances you hear Cesca, Rini, and Orin scream and panic.
Scouts fly between tree branches with smoke trailing behind. ODM gear ignites and retracts without any real clear sense of direction.
They're drowning back there.
You see the silhouette of someone falling to the forest floor.
"One of us needs to help them," you tell Eld, and he shakes his head sharply.
"You heard Captain Levi."
"They're two fucking Scouts down, Eld!" you snap at your comrade. "We'll lose seven whole people!"
"We can't go against captain's orders, Lieutenant!" Petra calls to you, and Oluo nods beside her.
Scanning your squad still soldiering ahead with the plan, you feel something grip your heart.
Yet another gut-wrenching shriek sounds from the forest.
Maybe it's Penelope.
Maybe it's Cesca.
The voices reverberate and echo through the forest that it's hard to tell.
You don't even realize that you're moving your hands over your cloak to push it out of the way.
Eighty to forty.
"The hell are you doing!?"
The clipped tone of Levi Ackerman as he drops back onto his stallion rips you back into focus.
His knee drops to the saddle, facing his soldiers rather than what's ahead.
Your eyes meet narrowed gray.
"I can help," you tell him calmly. "They're going to die."
"Stay."
"They're going to die, Le—"
"Stay, Lieutenant." Levi's nostril's flare. "That's an order."
Miro squad's screams continue to haunt your subconscious.
You promised.
You said you'd stay by his side.
But isn't this what the Scout Regiment is for?
To save humanity, to give them hope.
It used to be something you felt was such a crock of shit, but you can't ignore the screams back there.
You can't let them die.
"I'm going to help them," you tell him without a tremor. "You know I can do it."
Levi's eyes flash with an indiscernible emotion.
"We'll all come back in one piece. I'll guide them to the horses."
"No."
"And we'll make it to the end of this fucking forest."
You stare back at him, pleading a forgiveness you haven't asked for yet.
(You saved me once. Let me save them.)
"If you go," he growls, "James, if you go, I'll—"
"I'll take whatever punishment fits my crime," you cut him off, "but I can't let them all die."
His pupils shrink, sharpening the whites of his eyes.
The wheeze of ODM gear bursts into life as it lifts you off of your saddle and into the forest sky.
Without thinking, you twist at the hip and take off—
You head south towards the screaming squad as they fight to break free from the titan hoard holding them hostage.
Wind freezes your cheeks.
The outlines of their bodies grow more pronounced the closer you become.
Soon you see five Scouts flying around, swinging their swords to destroy the last remaining titan.
Below are a cluster of smaller dead ones decaying by the second.
Trina, Miro's second-in-command, screams at the top of her lungs as she reaches out to her comrades.
"Help! Please, I don't want to be eaten! Please!"
She's stuck in the clutches of a ten-meter titan, slowly bringing her closer and closer to its open mouth.
They’re everywhere.
(How did everything go so wrong so fast?)
You don't think about dying. You don't worry about how upset Levi will be when you return. You don't stop to second guess your actions.
You don’t.
You just do.
Yelling at the top of your lungs, you rip both blades from their metallic sheaths at your hips.
Spinning from the momentum of your swing, you slice straight through the wrist of the titan holding Trina hostage.
She falls with enough smarts to break her fall with her own gear.
“James!” Trina cries out with equal parts despair and relief. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"I came to make sure you were all okay," you tell them, shaking your head. "I guess you didn't really need back-up. We still have your horses..."
But you trail off, confused.
They should be relieved.
They killed every last titan back here.
Yet the Miro squad cling to the trees, skin as translucent as ghosts.
"Something big ate Penelope!" Cesca sobs, swinging her sword frantically to keep invisible outstretched fingers at bay. Her eyes are a window to nothing. As if she's curled into herself as she screams to you. "You need to—"
You're about to ask what the hell she's talking about.
But then you see it:
Climbing.
No, crawling through the trees, running like a rabid dog through the branches to eye up its prey.
A titan.
In comparison to other titans, it's practically a sun spot.
And it's so fast.
Eleven meters tall. Maybe thirteen.
You can't tell when its crouched like that.
Deformed.
Curled in on itself.
Then it halts when it sees you, blocking you from the rest of Miro squad.
A chill runs up your spine.
You stop to balance against the side of a tree trunk, staring face-to-face with your first Abnormal.
Its grin is something straight out a nightmare.
Its eyes track you, as if it...
As if it hopes you’ll flinch and begin the chase.
Shit.
You can't get around it.
You're stuck here — but the other five aren't.
“Trina, Miro, find Captain Levi,” you force yourself to speak, unable to look away from the Abnormal. “Take your squad north. Tell them you found an Abnormal."
“But—”
“I said go north, damn it,” you growl, clenching your teeth.
"What about you?" Miro asks.
“I'll be right behind you," you promise, though you damn well know you can't run straight through with your gear.
Why isn’t this titan attacking you?
Is it just waiting for you to run first?
Dedicate your heart.
No — this thing isn't going to kill you.
Max is dead. Penelope is dead.
But you came just in time to save five others.
You can save them, yourself, and this mission.
No, you won't die.
Not today.
“Go!”
Shouting at the top of your lungs, the Abnormal finally dives to attack you.
Only when you swing past it do you realize it was waiting — not for you, no, but for an eight-meter and ten-meter with blood all over its mouth to catch up.
Not one, but three Abnormals.
Shit.
Miro and Trina gather Orin, Cesca, and Rini.
All five swing through the trees back towards where you just came from.
In the meantime, you exhaust your efforts through intense ODM defensive maneuvers to avoid getting caught in the clutches — or teeth — of the three titans.
They chase after you, using the trees to their advantage.
It's no use.
You can't outrun all three.
So you'll have to fight these assholes to find a way out.
Turning abruptly, you side-step the lurching ten-meter reaching out towards you.
With a battle cry from the gut, you scream and slice straight through the nape of its neck.
Steam emits as it gurgles and stumbles, effectively dying on the forest floor.
One down.
Three to go.
You set your sights on the smaller titan first, gliding and sliding through the trees.
(The eleven-meter titan will be your greatest problem. You choose to make it your final priority.)
When you flip in the air, crown pointed to the ground and feet in the air, you can no longer see the bodies of Miro squad.
Only a faint trail of their gas fumes linger.
It’s just you, and the things that want to kill you.
But you won't die today.
No, you are not dying in this fucking forest.
Because you promised him.
Skating across a large tree trunk, you swan dive in the air and reattach your gear to opposite tree trunks, sights locked on the eight-meter titan.
The eight-meter monster stares directly at you, but you use its shoulder to lodge your spike directly into its flesh.
The momentum of the swing offers enough brutality to effectively rip into the nape of its neck, causing titan blood to splatter all over your body.
It stumbles, falling to the forest floor. You remain perched on its shoulder, sword extended.
Two down.
You can do this.
You can finish these titans off and meet up with the team before the mission is over.
It isn’t a lost cause.
Determined to see it through, you turn on the heel of your boot—
With a might crack of its arm, the eleven-meter knocks you clear off of the eight-meter’s shoulder and straight into the tree your gear is already attached to.
Your head hits.
The world turns into stars right before your eyes.
And before you can find yours wits and attack back—
Its fiery palm seizes your body from the tree trunk and squeezes.
The momentum nearly rips your spine in half when the Abnormal grabs you.
You gasp for air, knocked clear from your lungs.
Because you didn’t disengage your ODM line latched into the nearby tree, the sheer force of its grip on you bends your gear, forcing you to ragdoll between the points.
Shit.
The grapple of your gear won’t budge.
It won’t detract.
The jerking movements between the manhandling of the Abnormal and your jammed gear create a perfect storm of injuries.
Pops and crunches trickle up your body, breaking bones upon bones upon bones—
You see white.
The titan cannot get you loose from the tree, and you cannot get loose from it, so you act on pure instinct — with what little strength you have left, it stretches out and around to swipe your sword through the titans hand, narrowly missing your own chest.
One chance, and you took it.
Because not only did the sword cut through the titan, but it split the ODM line keeping you eleven meters in the air.
When you realize you can’t even breathe when the titan lets you go, you know what’s coming.
Weightless and numb of your own pain, you can feel the wind on your face, but your lungs refuse to expand.
They’re trapped from a cracked rib, and you’re out of time.
Something as bittersweet as foolish bravery crawls through your skin, burning it alive:
No one is coming.
You told Miro squad to run.
You defied orders.
—but you promised Levi you wouldn’t die.
(Is this the end of all things, right here?)
The screams and shouts echoing through your mind are not of Levi and Miro squad, no, but of your lost comrades — the ones who experienced the very same hopeless, fleeting feeling of fear right before they went.
You think of ash-blonde hair. Ginger locks.
Were Furlan and Isobel afraid?
When they couldn’t survive the Scouts, when they fought titans, did they look up at the sky just like you?
Did they know it was the end?
Were they worried they disappointed Levi?
Did they think of you, too, the way you're thinking about them?
Would they hate you for what you've done to Levi?
Four pairs of hopeful eyes walked up those Underground City stairs and into this world, yet only one will remain.
I promised.
You open your mouth, but nothing comes out.
No screams.
No sobs.
You reach for the branches, watching the glittering sun through the canopy of trees, but you cannot touch them.
There is nothing you can do.
I’m sorry.
You continue to reach for the sky like you’ll catch on something without strength.
Your adrenaline-addled mind runs through so many memories—
The fighting rings of the Underground City;
The dream of leaving this place;
The feeling of the sun on bare skin;
Him.
Levi Ackerman.
Captain of the Scout Regiment. Humanity’s Strongest.
Your best friend.
The love of your life.
The boy who saved you, over and over, until—
“James!”
Suddenly your body reacts with a pained, strangled gasp.
The beauty of the sun disappears when a dark, oval silhouette overtakes it.
A brilliant shimmer of emerald billows around it.
It twirls and slashes the nape of the eleven-meters neck before pivoting south.
Towards you.
The silhouette nears at supernatural speeds, a trail of gas zipping in its wake—
It’s a man.
His gaze is overtaken by the whites of his eyes.
With how fast he’s descending from the tree tops, it’s a miracle he ducks and dodges every rogue branch.
His black hair is pinned to the sides of his head. The terror is written all over his face.
That face…
Levi.
You can’t speak, but you instinctively reach for his hand.
He grits his teeth, willing his body to fall faster. He breaks a barrier and soars closer to your orbit.
“Stay with me!” Levi shouts, voice determined and strong. “I’ll catch you!”
But you’ve been falling for what feels like hours, and he’s caught you so many times in the past.
When you struggled with ODM gear training, Levi would be the one to spot your fall. Every time, without failure.
But it wasn't his duty to catch you.
It wasn't his duty to come back for you.
He reaches out a hand, teeth clenched, but his fingertips just barely miss yours.
"Shit. C'mon, James, reach!"
He's getting desperate.
You've never seen him desperate.
The ground must be close.
Is it close?
(I’m sorry.)
You wish you could tell him.
You wish you had the strength, the breath, to do so.
(I'm sorry.)
You failed him.
You didn’t listen.
You should have listened.
With what little strength is left in your both, you roll your shoulder forward to send your hand towards his.
Your fingertips touch again, but he can’t quite grasp you.
(But then so many others would have died. An entire squad of seven in a formation of fourteen instead of just three. Isn’t that what the Scouts are supposed to fight for, Levi? Isn’t that why we work so damn hard to achieve this dream for humanity?)
His breath hitches.
His eyes explode.
Because he knows what’s coming, too.
“James!”
A sorrowful breath that should be his name exits your mouth.
(Levi, I’m so sorry. I love—)
The back of your head slams into the ground.
A sickening thud.
A lost gasp of air.
The world goes black.
.
.
.
.
.
Why did you do it?
Do what?
.
.
.
.
.
“James!”
A baritone voice shouts your name.
It’s guttural, echoing with desperation. Fear.
.
.
.
.
.
You gave me a second chance.
.
.
.
.
.
The man dives through the trees at an otherworldly pace.
Arms pressed tight to his sides, he expertly zig-zags through an array of branches, propelling his body forward.
His emerald cloak billows from behind in an angelic halo.
As he nears, you can make out the whites of his widened eyes.
Instinctively, your hand reaches for him—
A certain sort of deja vu—
Then it hits.
.
.
.
.
.
Because where you go, I follow.
.
.
.
.
.
Something heavy crashes straight into your body.
Two strong arms envelope you.
A palm cradles the back of your head.
Metallic gear wheezes, straining against its mechanics when your side hits solid ground.
Over and over, you spin at lightning speed.
Whatever holds you does not let go.
— then you collide with something solid, and everything just stops.
Silence.
Dirt kicks up around you in a cloud.
Twin hearts beat against each other.
Slowly you raise your hand to your shoulder—
Reaching—
Until you find his hand.
Your shaking fingers curl over his.
.
#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman x you#attack on titan fanfiction#shingeki no kyoujin fanfiction#levi ackerman fanfiction#levi ackerman x female reader#aot fanfic#aot fanfiction#aot fic#snk fic#snk fanfic#levi ackerman fanfic#levi ackerman fic#attack on titan fanfic#attack on titan fic#levi x you#levi x reader#silver underground#amywritesthings
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💕 self-love time! talk about which ones of YOUR creations (edits, artworks, fanfics) you like the most then send to other creators to do the same 💕
ooh Amy, thank you so much! 💖 I had a lot of fun thinking about this question. And I am picking two from this year - a set of joel miller x f!reader fics that have loose connections (but can also be read as one-shots)
renegade
take it slow
Something I really love about Joel esp as someone who struggles with dialogue is that there is so much about him and what’s he’s thinking that’s revealed in his actions and touches. In what he allows, and what little he does say. And I really loved exploring some of those feelings and actions in these.
And! some fics I really hit moments of struggle or disinterest when wrapping up - but both of these just really seemed to flow, and sort of came together on their own. And I really cherish the ones like that, they just feel a little extra special to me!
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OMG HAPPY BIRTHDAY FLO!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you so much Amy, hope you're doing well!
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Get attacked!! ✨🌈SEND THIS TO OTHER BLOGGERS YOU THINK ARE WONDERFUL. KEEP THE GAME GOING🌈✨💖🌸🌸🌸
OMG AMES THANK UUUUU 🥰🌸
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JOEL MILLER - 2023 FIC RECS
this year has been filled with so many beautiful fics, I wanted to make a rec list to share & support everything I read. please check these out and support these creators, they are all incredible! 💖✨
— A Lover's Pinch by @hier--soir
a one-night stand with a charming texan turns into something much more thrilling when you discover he is your new college professor. joel miller is entirely off limits. but now that you’ve had a taste, will you be able to keep your hands to yourselves?
— A Matter of Timing by @lavenderursa
Before the world went to shit you and your neighbor, Joel, were involved. It was complicated then and now at the end of the world, it's much the same.
— A Minute From Home by @agentmarcuspike
— A Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing by @jupiter-soups
joel miller is not quite as scary as the people of jackson believe him to be. at least, not around you.
— A Very Furby Christmas by @/proxima-writes
it’s christmas eve 1998 and joel miller thinks everything is perfect. / well, until his brother admits he didn’t get sarah the one present she wanted - the furby. now, joel has to go out on christmas eve to find the year’s hottest toy that’s been sold out for months / turns out, you’re on the same mission. and you’ve both found the last furby in town.
— Asking Nicely by @grippingbeskar
— Autumn Air by @swiftispunk
it’s been a month since you returned home from costa rica and you and joel have fallen into a blissful routine. when a rude awakening threatens to disrupt that peace, together you must make a decision…or two.
— Barbie Girl by @tightjeansjavi
Joel, Sarah and Tommy go to the Barbie movie opening weekend
— Be Good, Be Quiet by @/undercoverpena
bill tells you both you're sleeping in separate rooms when a thunderstorm doesn't allow you to leave. but joel isn't planning on getting any sleep.
— Blue Jeans N'Texas Dreams by @/tightjeansjavi
Joel Miller, single father; total soft dad has an astronomically enormous crush on you, his daughters horseback riding instructor.
— Boston Holiday. by @/amywritesthings
You’re decorating for the holidays in your Boston Quarantine Zone apartment. A begrudging Joel Miller gets involved.
— Bunny Tails by @sweetercalypso
When hunter!Joel finds reader picking flowers outside his cabin, he convinces her to come inside
— But He Does Have You by @undercoverpena
because he hasn’t got a lot of anything, but he does have you.
—Butterfly by @stargirlfics
Sometimes the path to healing starts with a reminder of what’s been lost
— Can’t Help Myself by @fettuccin-e
— Catching by @softlyspector
None of your partners had ever been able to make you come before. Joel changed that.
— Comfortably Close by @omgreally
You and Joel share a couch.
— Come Clean by @cupofjoel
joel comes home after a messy day on patrol, but you’re already in the shower
— Comfort Came Against My Will by @/undercoverpena
it’ll begin with a little beg, a whispered plea—fingers wrapping around his chin, mouth ghosting over his: Let me ride you, Miller.
— Creature Comforts by @galactic-basic
A gift. Joel didn’t call it that. Didn’t say as much. Didn’t say anything—actually. / But it’s yours. Your mattress. Your bed. There are so few things you can call yours these days.
— Crystal by @ezrasbirdie
Joel's live-in girlfriend is a little witchy. It takes some getting used to.
— Dinner & Diatribes by @tightjeansjavi
you’re the kind of love that Joel Miller has been dreaming of all his life
— Dinner Date by @juletheghoul
neighbour!Joel au
— Distracted by @/psychedelic-ink
there are many advantages to enrolling in a woodshop class: drawing you away from not-so-happy thoughts, relearning something that you enjoyed doing when you were a kid, and, well, the sight of watching mr. miller do something he’s undeniably good at.
— Does Your Mother Know? by @/cupofjoel
— Flesh and Metal by @/swiftispunk
you meet joel at a bar. he really likes your nipple piercings. that’s about it.
— From Eden, Love Grows by @moonlight-prose
Days spent in flower fields and cooking in a sunbathed kitchen with him.
— Grays by @/softlyspector
Joel likes to be read to and held and have his hair stroked. He would never dare admit it, though.
— Go Slow by @/frannyzooey
In the quiet of your bedroom, Joel guides you through it.
— Honeyed by @/softlyspector
You hate being touched, but you might be willing to put aside your discomfort for a tattoo from Joel.
— Honeymoon by @bits-and-babs
— Hurt by @/moonlight-prose
alone and trying to survive, you find your path crossing with a man who’s headed to boston of all places. he claims he’s looking for a new start, not realizing you might be it.
— I Crawl Home To Her by @/agentmarcuspike
after being stabbed, joel floats in and out of consciousness, between then and now, before and after, and his two daughters, both saving him in their own ways.
— I Know My Faults, But I Can't Hide Them… by @tarrenterror25
It’s all about surviving now. Joel knows it and so do you.
— I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus by @/thetriumphantpanda
Your daughter catches you kissing santa… or does she?
— Juniper by @/softlyspector
You're sleepy. Joel knows a good way to put you to sleep.
— Ktober 2023 Day 24- Lingerie by @flightlessangelwings
— Keep It On The Low by @/cupofjoel
just because you and joel broke up doesn’t mean you can’t still (secretly) enjoy each other’s company
— Let Me Take Care Of You by @spaceydragons
Joel had a rough day, you take care of him
— Living in a State of Dreaming by @/cupofjoel
it’s been a year since you, joel, and ellie returned to jackson, and you’re finally starting to feel a sense of security. but when the sun goes down and joel closes his eyes, the horrors beyond the walls still hunt him, out to take back the family he’s worked so hard to protect.
— Made By Hand by @tinycozycomfort
He has nothing to offer, after all; no love letter, no borrowed jacket, no wedding ring. This is all he has to show his devotion, to seal his promise—a fist full of glossy blue and the willingness to unfurl his body and scoop out his insides just to allow you a place to lay. All he can give you is himself.
— Met The Devil Last Night by @pedgito
made a joke about wanting to screw dirt-covered Joel even if he was deep in the trenches of hell and…well, yeah.
— Middle of the Night by @/frannyzooey
He comes to you for comfort.
— Midnights by @/omgreally
Joel pulls back, and the blown-pupil intensity in his eyes makes you clench. “That a challenge?” he wonders, fingering the waistband of your jeans. / “You got any better ideas on how to ring in the new year, Joel Miller?”
— Mine by @the-scandalorian
He wants it—has wanted it. / He wants the claim. The utter possession.
— Misbehavior by @/stargirlfics
It’s the first and last time you ever talk back to his face
— Moments by @charnelhouse
Joel and you in a hotel phone booth.
— More and More by @/moonlight-prose
“he wanted to know every part of you, everything you kept hidden for fear of it being rejected. and you let him.”
— Moss & Mushrooms by @/softlyspector
You are alone, always. Then, one day, a beast emerges from the forest you've never dared to go into.
— My Girl Now by @/psychedelic-ink
joel is used to asshole clients, and when one of them calls him an old man and basically demands him to finish his girlfriend’s kitchen in time, he expects you to be the same. But you’re the opposite. when he learns how you’ve been treated, he comes up with a plan to get back at your boyfriend.
— Old Partners, New Plans by @grippingbeskar
— One Bed by @frannyzooey
“there is only one bed” + joel miller
— Only Need Ten by @pascalpvnk
“Joel,” your whine muffled by your pillow. “I have to leave in fifteen minutes, I can’t be late for patrol again. We have to be back in time for Sunday brunch.” / “Only need ten, baby,” he drawled in a hushed tone, hooking his thick fingers beneath the waistband of your panties. “Please?”
— Picture by @/softlyspector
You really want to take Joel's picture. He can't really figure out why.
— Pieces of You by @pedros-mustache
Maybe it’s wrong. Maybe it’s possessive and a tad bit jealous. Maybe after years working alongside Tess, you’ve simply learned to lay your claim on what is yours.
— Press the Gas and Ride by @charnelhouse
comfort in a car
— Roadside Delight by @/inklore
joel should have known you’d be trouble when he found you on the side of the highway. he should have known you’d taste so fucking sweet too.
— See You by @hopeamarsu
— Seeing You, Seeing Me by @amywritesthings
After handling a life-or-death favor for Tess, you're in deep shit. Until she can make things right, she suggests you lay low at her place for the week. The issue? It's also Joel Miller's place, and you're pretty sure he hates you.
— Silence by @/frannyzooey
Joel makes a silent promise.
— So, My Darlin' by @/psychedelic-ink
you convince joel to have a bubble bath with you.
— Sober by @/sweetercalypso
When Joel needs a break from reality, he finds the perfect distraction in a QZ dive bar
— Something Bad by @/fettuccin-e
— Something Wild and Unruly by @/ezrasbrdie
At Madame Aurelie's Secret Garden, men pay for beautiful courtesans trained in pleasure to give them whatever they want. And all Joel Miller, infamous outlaw and gunslinger, ever seems to want from you is a warm bath and quiet conversation.
— Standing in the Eye of the Storm by @/stargirlfics
You find each other at the end of the world
— Stay In Bed by @/psychedelic-ink
After your grandfather’s passing, you find yourself moving into his home in Texas. You meet the Millers; Tommy, his older brother Joel and his daughter Sarah. With time, you and Tommy become close friends and Sarah visits you often. But Joel…Joel keeps his distance. The reason for this is due to one crucial fact you don’t know but he does; Tommy has a crush on you. Which means you’re off limits no matter what. But as your own feelings for Joel grow, things start to get more and more complicated.
— Sweet Thing by @mandoisapunk
the most unlikely pair in jackson just can’t get enough of each other.
— Sweet Words of Sin by @/moonlight-prose
“there was a certain high that came from this. having a man like joel miller relenting to your every word, all to hear those sweet words fall from your lips. as delicious as a glass of wine and just as sinful.”
— Sweetned Breath and Tongue So Mean by @/moonlight-prose
“joel couldn’t fathom what you saw in him. a man bloodied with the ravages of life. he’d taken life, killed to survive, and there were times he even fucking enjoyed it. but you were soft. you were the good that remained. the light he shouldn’t be allowed to tarnish.”
— Take Care of You by @theidiotwhowritesthings
You spent your entire adult life supporting yourself and barely getting by. It’s why a life of ease offered to you by a mysterious stranger sounded so foreign and unbelievable. Joel Miller, dressed in flannels that had seen better days, didn’t look like the kind who could promise you the world on a plate, but he seemed desperate to help out. All he asks is that you let him take care of you. That wouldn’t be so hard. Would it?
— Take Your Medicine by @/hier--soir
your medication makes it difficult to orgasm so joel (and your vibrator) help make it happen.
— Tarnished But So Grand by @morning-star-joy
tommy and maria lead a jovial existence in the countryside, but the appearance of tommy’s brother causes a stir in society with the dark rumors swirling around his reputation, some due to his standoffish demeanor and some due to the mysterious parentage of his rambunctious young ward miss williams
— The Checklist by @thetriumphantpanda
Your new boyfriend Joel finds your hidden stash of porn, full of pages with their corners folded over, marking the things you like the most. Expecting him to feel bad about finding things you’re into, things you haven’t asked for from him, you’re surprised when he offers to help you tick them off.
— The Dog of War by @/bits-and-babs
When Ellie is taken by David, Joel breaks open the part of him locked away since his hunter days. As the guilt eats him alive, you try to help him subdue the black dogs of mental warfare.
— The Revenant Wife by @pettyprocrastination
Ellie knows very little of Joel and even less of the wife he had before the outbreak. When she finally meets you, its just as much as shock to her as it is to your husband.
— The Way We Fight by @/cupofjoel
you and joel love taking your frustrations out on each other—in more ways than one
— Toyin’ With Them Older Guys by @proxima-writes
Joel Miller is the grumpy bartender and owner of your favorite bar near campus, where you attend trivia every Tuesday night. Thinking there’s no way Joel could return your feelings, your friend suggests trying out Tinder. / But when you bring them to the bar for a date, they keep leaving mid date with no explanation. / Maybe there’s something Joel isn’t telling you after all.
— Trust Fall by @/tinycozycomforts
This, that was a shy thing at first, set into motion by some passing remark you’d made all those months ago—that he would do anything for you if you just asked nice enough.
— Two by @/the-scandalorian
— Watch Party by @/sweetercalypso
renting a Halloween movie turns into a nightmare when poltergeist!Joel Miller crawls out of your TV
— Way Too Damn Needy by @/cupofjoel
— What I Want by @/proxima-writes
joel comes home from a rough day of patrol and you know just what he needs.
— When You're Reading Me by @/psychedelic-ink
If you had to make a list of things Joel Miller might buy you as a gift— nipple clamps, would not be a part of it.
— Wicked Games by @inklore
relationships are built on trust. favors, kindness, and hands meant to help, not maim. there’s no room for dishonesty, games, or ploys. that’s not the storybook way of things or how life should be. but maybe those rules only mattered when you weren’t living in a world that’s gone to shit | joel miller x smuggler!reader
— Wish You Were Here by @macfrog
you and joel skip jackson’s annual holiday party in favor of some alone time. (not that kind you filthy animals it’s the HOLIDAYS)
— Woods by @/frannyzooey
— You Know I Don’t Mean It by @joelscruff
you and joel get off together. that’s pretty much it. you also have some unresolved feelings for him and he’s being closed off.
— You Take My Self Control by @/cupofjoel
your first act of brutality leaves you reeling, but you’d do it all over again if it meant saving joel’s life. in the aftermath, you realize you’ve started to crave that violence and it terrifies you. joel steps in to satisfy your craving.
— Your Summer Dream by @/swiftispunk
fresh on the heels of the worst breakup of your life, you find an unexpected kindred spirit in joel miller, who's agreed to tag along for seven days to a tropical resort with you and your parents.
if you haven’t read these, you need to! and please support these amazing fics & writers by reading, reblogging & commenting! 💕
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