#and all the talk about institutes and bal’s ‘i see you nimona’ like ?? what in the tma

[trashydez]

finally had time to watch nimona and what the fuck

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Nimona headcanons I wrote instead of sleeping

Sometimes the boys forget that Nimona isn’t human 

Like they’re used to the shifting into animals aspect of Nimona because she does it as often as she breathes

But sometimes she’ll do some really creepy shit like make her arms longer to reach something when she’s too lazy to get up

One time they shifted just their neck to be like an owl so they could turn their head 180 degrees instead of just turning around cause that was “too boring” 

Or he’ll mimic people’s voices without realizing it 

Sometimes he’ll tell a story and suddenly he’s using Bal’s voice 

The first time she did this Bal searched the whole house cause he was convinced that Todd has snuck in

Or she’ll grow an extra arm to hold more shit and they take a moment to realize “oh yeah we adopted a little weirdo” 

They get used to it after a while and the arguments surrounding it are always funny because both the boys will complain and say “I don’t sound like that” and they have to be told “No love you do you really do” 

You know those videos of babies reacting to their parents shaving their facial hair or putting on glasses 

That’s Nimona's reaction every single time the boys change their appearance even the smallest bit they cant shave or wear their reading glasses because if they do he freaks out 

Talking some “help me Nemesis I heard bosses voice but I can’t find him” while Bal was standing right in front of them 

It was the first time he shaved his face in years and he’s never doing it again 

Mostly cause Ambrosius kept telling him he looked like a teenager and it was freaking him out 

I feel like Bal and Ambrosius are those kinds of people who will tell people about the little injuries but neglect the big ones 

Like Bal mentioned that he thinks he sprained his ankle during the fight at the institute but he won’t mention that he’s pretty sure he got a concussion 

(BECAUSE THIS MAN HEAD-BUTTED TWO PEOPLE WHEN HE HAS A METAL ARM) 

(I’m bout to wrap this man in bubble wrap and give him a helmet because wtf) 

Ambrosius will complain the whole day about the fact that he has a paper cut

But will completely neglect to inform his doctors “Oh yeah I can’t move my left arm higher than my waist without pain and I can’t see that well out of my left eye or hear that well out of my left ear do you think that’ll be a problem?” 

It isn’t until Nimona makes an off handed comment about how this super weird that the laser did basically nothing to him that he told both of them

They literally dragged him to the ER because “Who thinks those symptoms are normal Nemesis what is wrong in that pretty little head of yours!!” 

When Bal tells Nimona she’s being a bit of a hypocrite (cause who refers to an arrow as a splinter?) she turns to him and says “I know you’re not saying something Mr. Human battering ram” 

It took literally everything in Ambrosius not to break down laughing

After that she forces them to have frequent checkups with the doctor because these dorks wouldn’t go otherwise

Honestly I'm fully convinced that some people in the kingdom don't know who Nimona is and are constantly confused why they let this little weirdo follow them around 

And finally the curiosity will eat away at them and they’ll finally ask 

Sometimes the boys will give some “normal” answers like “Oh that’s Nimona” and they won’t elaborate at all

Sometimes they’ll give funnier answers like “Oh that’s a raccoon we found in the garage who turned into a person one day” “I don’t know they just showed up in our living room” and their personal best “You see her too?” 

And their favorite that they only started using a couple of years down the line “Oh that’s our kid”

[yrrtyrrtwhenihrrthrrt]

Something I don't see talked about in regards to Bal and Amb's healing/forgiveness arc:

As we all know, Ambrosius (unlike his comic counterpart) is really sorry about severing Ballister's arm. It was largely an accident, but he feels awful about it pretty much from the moment it happened (I know that in the comic he feels bad, but he doesn't say so)

However, also unlike his comic counterpart, Boldheart isn't actually angry with Ambrosius about the arm. At no point does he express resentment or hostility in regards to that specific incident, if anything, it just made him anxious of Ambrosius rather than angry (evidenced by him pulling back his hand reflexively after seeing Ambrosius at the institute)

Boldheart is angry with Ambrosius, though. Not for his arm, but for failing to hear him out, for believing the Director over him, for repeatedly and entirely misjudging his character.

And what's interesting to note is that Ambrosius is not clearly sorry for those things (at least not during the movie, it can be assumed he was sorry after)

When Ballister meets him in the Antlered Serpent, he tells Ambrosius he has 30 seconds to explain himself. When Ambrosius says this is unreasonable, Ballister says "Why? It's more than you gave me," but Ambrosius is defensive. He doesn't say he's sorry, he says "That's not fair."

He is more like his comic counterpart than people realize in that when it came to the thing Ballister was actively upset about, he became defensive, he felt he was justified, he didn't apologize. Yes, he apologized for the arm, but that didn't seem to matter to Ballister. He needed him to apologize for the emotional betrayal more than for a reflexive physical action.

I think a lot of people portray Ballister as an UwU smol bean who would forgive Ambrosius wholly and immediately because he was never upset with him in the first place, to which I reiterate, he was never upset about the arm. He was proper fucking pissed at him at the Antlered Serpent even before Ambrosius started accusing Nimona of shit. Even when Bal thought Ambrosius was actually going to finally be on his side, he was thankful and obviously still loved him, but he was wary and prickly. Then Ambrosius proceeded to, for the Nth time, not believe him again.

Similarly, a lot of people portray Ambrosius as super apologetic, utterly unproblematic, and regarding himself as being entirely in the wrong and of a "Bal can do no wrong" attitude which is really not what we see in the film.

And this, to me, makes their relationship more compelling because it shows how these two must have worked and grown to be able to trust each other again.

[walrus150915]

cw: discussions of nonsexual grooming

There is one thing that has been spinning on my mind ever since I watched the movie. This conversation isn't that popular in the fandom, probably due to its uncomfortable subject matter, but it needs to be discussed. I'll be the one to start

The Director has groomed Ambrosius and it affected him far into adulthood

(A really long analysis post)

Warning: I'm not a psychologist neither am I really educated in this sphere, and I never was a victim of grooming, so don't take my words as 100% truth. However, I'm a literature student, so I can analyse a few scenes and make a conclusion lol

So, to start off, let's share the definition of grooming, shall we?

"Grooming is when someone builds a relationship, trust and emotional connection with a child or young person so they can manipulate, exploit and abuse them."

Now, of course Ambrosius is an adult in the movie, and we can't exactly know his entire history with the Director. So this analysis will take a few things as truth despite them not being confirmed

- the Director has been by Ambrosius's side throughout most of his life. Considering the fact that she's been around even when Ballister was a child, the same can be assumed about Ambrosius

- we as viewers do not see Ambrosius's parents (because this is quite unnecessary to the narrative, maybe we'll see them in a sequel Quane and Bruno were teasing buttt¯\_(ツ)_/¯), and he's been in the Institute since childhood, so it seems like the Director was the most reliable adult in Ambrosius's life

Despite Ambrosius being a grown man, the effect the Director has on him cannot be denied. His relationship to the Director is like half his character arc, the man being torn between his loyalty to the kingdom and his lover

I will take a few scenes from the movie where Ambrosius and the Director interact and try to analyse them

Starting off strong, we've got the "acting like common children" scene. I could point out the obvious bias the Director puts in her words (villainizing an oppressed group of people as a rich white woman in power how nice of her) but we ain't coming to her throat for classism today. Pay attention to her praising Ambrosius and singling him out. "Thankfully, we have a descendant of Gloreth to lead us"

Are other knights happy to be around Ambrosius tho? The answer is no

(Text below is taken from the screenplay. The scene is after Nimona's and Bal's escape)

***

Knights: I knew we never should have trusted Ballister./If Goldenloin hadn't trusted him.../Well, if Goldenloin hadn't helped him...

***

Todd: This is his fault!

Knights: Yeah!/Tell him, Todd!

Goldenloin realizes all eyes are on him

***

I think it wouldn't be wrong to assume Ambrosius's colleagues dislike him at best and outcast him at worst. Compared to Todd, who seems to be the more liked one amongst their peers (bro really is a jock bully high school stereotype in his 20s isn't that embarrassing), Ambrosius is isolated. He doesn't have anybody except Ballister and the Director. And as you all know Ballister and Ambrosius are separated for the most of the movie. So it leaves him with the Director as the closest person to interact with. Yeah...

Also in this scene she displays TWO tactics groomers use to manipulate their victims: isolation and favouritism

Another scene I'd like to pay attention to is Ambrosius's ✨iconic✨ freak out

"What's on your mind, Ambrosius? You can talk to me"

"...I'm fine, Director"

This scene actually left me confused on the first watch because it looks like a perfect moment for the Director to seem at least somewhat sympathetic. It truly seems like she cares about him

Honestly it's pretty hard for me to surely say whether or not she's being sincere or not but her goal is definitely to win over Ambrosius's trust, to make him believe she's a safe person (now that his real safe person is away ajdjdjj). That is also another tactic for groomers to manipulate their victims

And I think it would be fair to mention Director's attitude towards Ballister's and Ambrosius's relationship. It's obvious she knows about them (...not like it's rocket science have you seen these lovebirds) and disapproves. She doesn't outright state it but it's really clear

"Sir Goldenloin, is your loyalty to this Kingdom or to the knight who consorts with a monster?"

Again, amazing case of manipulation. She doesn't say Institute, nor "me" or whatever. She says kingdom. And she clearly knows that it works on Ambrosius, because he is, after all, Gloreth's descendant. Gloreth was the original protector, and Ambrosius is supposed to be the protector now. By choosing Ballister he betrays the kingdom, his bloodline and Gloreth

Now, I know this scene is not Ambrosius & the Director because it's Nimona in disguise but considering how good Nimona was in playing her part we might as well assume real Ambrosius would act the same.

Look at these eyes. He's afraid of her. She has the complete power over him. And Ballister is aware of this (if that's how he told Nimona to act)

Off-topic but I watched Nimona with two of my buddies yesterday and during this scene they both went like "Wait, who is she to Ambrosius again? Is she his mother? Because she acts like she one" and they are so damn right???

Now remember the fact that during one of the interviews Eugene Lee Yang said that the Director is Ambrosius's parental figure. Do with this information whatever you wanna do

I'm still not over her audacity in this scene. Her lip didn't even twitch and she's killing a person whom she praised for his bloodline. Saying "May Gloreth forgive you" while DRIVING A SWORD THROUGH HIM is beyond evil like??? Chill out Nancy Reagan???

I could say that this is the scene that debacles the American model minority myth (with East Asians being put on a pedestal and used to further reinforce white supremacy). A white woman killing an East Asian man while using a Christ-like figure to justify her actions (Gloreth is literally mentioned to be a Christ figure in the art book), and, if we take into account the theory that she wanted to set Ballister up so that it looks like he killed Ambrosius, BLAMING IT ON A BROWN ASIAN MAN was really a choice huh

The Director killed Ambrosius the second he questioned her, the second he wasn't useful to her

And how was he being useful to her? Allow me to introduce you to the scene which made me SUPER uncomfortable once I realized what was going on

During most of the movie Ambrosius acts rather impulsively, reflexes play a big part in his body language. And what does he do? He protects her with his body

"We need to get you to safety!"

Ambrosius was trained in a way that he needed to protect the Director with his body and his life.

Even in scenes where Ambrosius and the Director don't interact you can see how much Ambrosius is brainwashed.

"She manipulated you. She manipulated both of us. But together we'll take her down, you'll be a knight again"

"Thank you. The Director can't-"

"The Director? Oh, no, Bal. I'm talking about your sidekick"

Ambrosius refuses to even think about the effect the Director has on him. He's insisting on Nimona being the manipulator despite him being manipulated

Finally, when Ambrosius realizes something is CLEARLY wrong, he still tries to talk some sense into her

"But what if we're wrong? What if we've always been wrong?"

Despite him being a constant witness to Director's misdeeds he tries to do everything peacefully. Look at his face. This is a face of a man who doesn't want to harm. He gives the Director a chance to improve herself. I think he would forgive her after everything she's done

...but being a conservative she'd rather explode than admit she's wrong. So she attempts to kill Ambrosius again

This, again, says that no matter how much mercy you show to hateful people, they'll continue to be horrible to you. Just because they think they have a right to

Analysing Ambrosius's and the Director's relationship I think it'd be more than valid to state that she has, indeed, groomed Ambrosius to exploit and use him for her own (political and other) benefits. Other knights were brainwashed and groomed too, but something about her attitude towards Ambrosius really bugged me the wrong way

She is an excellent manipulator and Ambrosius fell victim to that, which is no surprise

Thank you for reading this! It took so long to make😭 If you want to add on anything in the reblogs please do, because the discussion HAS to happen at some point

[little-cereal-draws]

ok i see everyone's "ballister and ambrosius as nimona's parents" stuff but i'm going to raise you this

Ballister and Dr. Blitzmeyer as nimona's parents

I know there's the Gay Dad au sanctifying ambrosis as nimona's dad but he seems to get frustrated with Nimona more frequently than Ballister and I kinda got the sense that adopting her was mostly Bal's choice. Don't get me wrong, ambrosius has moments where he enjoys himself and he loves her, but I don't think he's thrilled abt the idea of her being here forever. He gives "good at babysitting but needs to give the child back at a certain point" vibes and obviously he can't do that when it's his kid

However in the Everything Is Fine au (the one where they all live in the cabin in the woods) Blitzmeyer is Nimona's guardian and they move from the city to the woods together, eventually moving in w Bal and Ambrosius.

Besides this au I don't think Blitzmeyer and Nimona ever interact, but I thought it was very interesting how the one time they do, she's also Nimona's guardian (I believe that's the word ND Stevenson uses, not "parent.") Already in this one picture, they look happier than Ambrosius did lol

I'm sure movie ambrosius would be much more willing to try and get to know nimona but what if the sticking point is with her this time? She can't get over what he did to both her and Bal, he reminds her too much of Gloreth, she's still wary of anyone that was that ingrained in the institute, and a million other things. She knows he's really trying and feels bad about everything but bc of all she's been through, she's not quick to trust people who betrayed her. Especially if she's only had bad interactions with them until this point. She avoids/shuts down his attempts to connect with her and is generally closed off and angry when he's there. It's like a kid hating their new stepparent lol Both Bal and Ambrosius know it's nothing personal, just the defense mechanism that's kept her safe from people like ambrosius for so long, but it still hurts. Eventually, he gives up trying to reach out to her and figures maybe she'll come to him or maybe they just won't be as close as he hoped.

Now, Bal's weird science friend is someone more Nimona's speed lol Blitzmeyer has somehow remained almost completely immune to institute propaganda, doesn't really care abt breaking things (the law included) if it can further her work in some way, and is just kooky enough to appeal to Nimona. She lets nimona help in the lab and doesn't mind the million questions she asks because that's just another opportunity to talk abt her work. They go on some adventures getting stuff for Blitzmeyer's experiments and really bond. Eventually they become pretty close and Nimona frequently goes out of her way to see Blitzmeyer.

One night late in the lab, Bal mentions that Nimona really likes her and Dr Blitzmeyer is like "really? no, not that much." And Bal's like "no, really that much. About as much as she likes me actually." And then with creeping awareness they both slowly look at each other with the realization that they're co-parenting now and actually have been for a while. After the initial freak out, they keep going almost like normal but throw in an outing every other month or so. They'll take Nimona for ice cream or some other casual thing and she's none the wiser that they've figured her out. One night as they were coming home from a movie or smth Nimona says, "I'm so glad we did this, I love spending time with my two favorite people." Nimona keeps walking but they have to stop to silently freak out to each other a bit lol

The only problem is that they frequently get mistaken for a nuclear family on these outings. And it doesn't help that Bal and Blitzmeyer often refer to each other as "my partner." (They open a lab together at the end of the comic and I think they would as well after the movie, so they are literally business partners and lab partners. But I like to hc them in a queer platonic relationship as well, so the word "partner" has a double meaning here. Ambrosius is Bal's romantic partner and Blitzmeyer is his platonic partner. They all talked abt it, it's all good.) Every time this happens though, Bal has to explain that they're just friends and he actually has a husband back at home. Some people go "ok, 'just friends,' sure. wink wink nudge nudge ;)" or "ok... does your husband know...? That you... and her...? ok, ok." It makes Bal angry when this happens but neither him or Blitzmeyer cares enough to actually do anything about it. Nimona just laughs at the stranger's confusion at their unconventional family.

Anyway, they're just two friends who somehow found themselves raising a 1000 year old shapeshifter together lol Ambrosius is disappointed Nimona didn't like him as much as he hoped but now he can just stay home and vibe lol

[madlad-sadgal]

So I was re-watching Nimona for the I-don't-even-know-at-this-point time, as one does, and it got to the part where she's asking Bal if he's ever been over the wall and he's talking about the fact that going over the wall is basically a suicide mission, and it got me thinking...

Like I said in my previous post, everything about the realm (the wall, the institute, the toys, even the goddamn food) is built around/exists because of her. If it wasn't for her meeting Gloreth a millennium before, none of this would exist. Therefore...

Nimona knows that there is nothing beyond the wall. She knows that there is nothing to fear and that the wall is there to keep her specifically out (and it is doing a very poor job considering she is inside that very wall). So what she is basically saying is, "I know there is nothing to fear, but I want to see if you can really look at what you were taught and realize how shitty and non-sensical it is."

She is basically trying to see how much he actually believes in all the lies the Institute had told him. She asks him, "Have you even been outside the wall?" And honestly the phrasing kinda resembles, like, "Do you even know what you're doing?" Like when you know someone is doing something incredibly stupid, but they haven't realizes it yet and you're trying to make them realize it.

And Bal responds with, "Uh, yeah, because I have a death wish. NO!" He is not only telling her that he believes that whatever is beyond the wall is dangerous, but also that he has no solid proof that there even is something beyond it, and still chooses to believe whatever lie he was told.

So yeah, just a little something I realized and I am definitely reading into this too much, but oh well. I just love this little shapeshifting gremlin with all my heart is all ♥️

[reinedeslys-central]

tbh I keep seeing the takes of ppl (and ballister) about ambrosius thinking he would kill the queen but not play freestyle jazz - and it totally makes sense and all with all the context -

BUT. I just wanna point out.

the look of indecision and shock/surprise on his face every time he sees bal after the incident, and even during the incident? the split second where he considers the other knights about to turn on him for knowing his partner best and steps up to lead the search saying 'before anyone gets hurt'? like say all you will (and I agree), but that scene to me reads exactly like someone trying to get to their lover first and protect them and prove their innocence before others can convict them sans trial (looking at you wangxian) OR, also, the realisation that you have to play it safe because the community has found out your lover is queer and the pitchforks are high, but you've always been the golden child / carrying a legacy, and you make the instinctive decision to stay safe for a multitude of reasons (after all, you can't shelter them by losing your rep too, can you? or so you think. same thing in the 'prom' teen-movie btw which is a whole thing to unpack on another day but this same theme is there!).

the first time he looks like he's against bal is after the director proclaims him leader of the search - and compared to his expressions all before then, it feels so much like a mask (mask-esque. not fake, just.. if you get what I mean? I don't really have the words this is just a brain vomit anyway, insert long discussion abt masks and conflicting emotions here ig) and it cracks immediately when he sees him breaking out of jail with nimona in the hallway. and honestly I'm down to give him a little slack after that because, comedically, he totally walked in RIGHT after ballister talked about murdering everyone, and then our boi didn't even manage to blurt out that he was innocent they just got caught up angstily staring at each other. which. :)

even in all the scenes that come after - yeah, definitely can see the totally-thought-he-was-the-killer-ambrosius-why-are-you-like-this angle. and i agree. bad moves all around, dude. but! my man lowering his crossbow in the market? I don't know about you but that doesn't look like a someone who's only holding back because he loves the target. that's a guy that looks unsure about the process the whole way through the scene. (bit of a stretch I know) and the thing that ties it together is the conversation with the director in the car. when he talks about feeling unsure of his legacy? the moment with the crowd and autograph? feeling like a traitor to his personal beliefs and the institution he was raised for? the hope, trying to discreetly make it to the car? it's all there, man. he's isolated from the only person that thinks differently, still outwardly pretending he's 100% with the institute's actions and lashing out with the things that still make sense and overlap with both mindsets.

yeah, ambrosius definitely messed up (ex. 1: arm-chopping as a love language of brainwashing omg pure gold) but? every step makes sense. i'd cut anyone a bit of slack for the doubt and wanting to reconcile their life when everything's turned on its head, especially after hearing bf in question saying he wants to murder everyone ^v^

and also i just. this movie is SO COOL for somehow touching on so many themes so core to so many peoples' experiences. TT y'all please go watch it it's free on yt until feb 26 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4CFWTYFRlw

definitely going to read the comic as soon as I can - I know it's supposed to be way darker, more subtle, with an ambiguous ending but that's it, so excited to see the original spin on this story :))

[withthewerewolves]

I have to cut a ton of the second chapter of my time travel fix-it fic because it resolves the emotional issues too soon but I'm mad about it so I'm gonna post most of the cut stuff here

Bal is quiet for a long moment. Then he says, “In that case, do you think you can tell me what happened? In your version?” 

A part of Ambrosius knew he was going to have to do this. If this is some sort of chance to atone, an opportunity for redemption, like in the novel series that was popular when his parents were kids and that Ballister had found battered copies of one harsh winter, it has to include acknowledging what he did wrong, telling Ballister the whole sorry tale and doing whatever penance he decides is necessary. Maybe that’s what he was doing wrong before. They haven’t talked about any of it, Ballister doesn’t seem to want to, but maybe what he’d told himself was respecting boundaries was actually cowardice. And Ambrosius Goldenloin isn’t a coward. 

So he tells Bal all of it. Every detail he can remember. Everything he did or didn’t do. He doesn’t linger on his mistakes, but neither does he leave them out. They were trained in mission reports, so that’s how he formats it, a neat outline of actions, reactions, and consequences. It isn’t enough, he knows, but it’s a start. Bal doesn’t interrupt, doesn’t ask for clarification. He barely seems surprised, though of course Ambrosius babbled out the worst parts this morning. 

When it’s over, Ambrosius watches Bal carefully for the anger he’s been waiting for since he and Bal fell through that arena floor. Or maybe since the first day they met all those years ago. For Bal to look at what he’s done, look him in the eye, and tell him he isn’t enough. 

Bal doesn’t do that. He’s still holding Ambrosius’s hand in his. He lifts it to his lips. Then he says, lips still pressed against his knuckles, “Why did you think I would have killed the Queen?” He shakes his head quickly. “Not in the moment, you were just reacting to a threat. But afterwards.” 

Ambrosius says, quiet. “I don’t think that was the right way to react to a threat.” It’s not what Bal is asking. He’s asking the big question, the one that goes to the heart of the problems between them, and Ambrosius is going to have to come up with an answer for it. But he’s had a lot of time to think, lying awake in his lonely bed, and he thinks this is maybe a deeper question, the rot at the heart of the Institute. Maybe the heart of the whole kingdom. 

This Bal has only just heard the whole story. He didn’t watch the damage the knights did to the city trying to stop Nimona. He didn’t hold Nimona on the tip of that giant golden sword only to see her die to defend that same city from the woman who was sworn to protect it. He hasn’t been beyond the Wall. And, to be fair, that isn’t a good answer to the question he’d asked. So he says, a little hurt in his voice, “Ambrosius. You know me. Why would you think I would do that?” 

And Ambrosius, despite having known this was coming for months, doesn’t have a good answer. So he says, shame hot in his veins and thick in his throat, “I shouldn’t have. I should have known you wouldn’t. You were the best of all of us - all the knights - not just at the stuff we studied but at being a knight. We were supposed to be brave and honorable because it’s in our blood, but I knew that was bullshit! I’ve met Todd! And you were brave and honorable - you still are. Even after everything. And I - I knew that. I knew that,” he says again, quieter. 

They aren’t facing each other. They’re between a tree and the boulder, looking out over what used to be the clearing around the tower, before the forest started creeping back in. Ambrosius doesn’t think he could say any of this if he had to look Ballister in the eye. 

Ballister still hasn’t let go of his hand, though he’s let their joined hands fall into his lap. The hurt is gone from his voice, but it’s been replaced by steel when he says, “If you knew that, then why didn’t you believe me?” 

“Because I saw it!” His voice has gotten too loud again, but there’s nothing nearby to startle. “I saw you kill her, or I thought I did. And then you ran off, and everyone was acting like they’d known all along you were a traitor. Like they were justified for treating you the way they did,” he spits out. There’s a prickle behind his eyes but he isn’t going to cry, not this time. This is what the earlier hysteria was for. “And I’d always thought I was the only one who got to see the real you, but what if that wasn’t true at all? What if you’d just created a different persona, designed just to draw me in?” He has to swallow around a lump, but he isn’t going to cry. “I’d thought I was so lucky, to get to be with you, for you to put up with all my - my shit. Doesn’t it make more sense? For you to have some other agenda? For me to just be - be duped.” He pauses to take a couple of long, slow breaths, but when Ballister opens his mouth Ambrosius shakes his head. “I couldn’t trust myself. I couldn’t trust my own judgment. I couldn’t be sure that loving you hadn’t made me blind. So I trusted the Director and - and fucking Todd - instead, and I’m so - so - sorry for that.” 

Ballister’s grip has been tightening around his hand, as if he thinks Ambrosius is going to run off, unable to face the consequences of his actions. But his voice is calm when he asks, “Have you told the other me - the future me - that?” 

Ambrosius swallows another lump and shakes his head. “I knew I’d have to at some point, but you never brought it up and -” he huffs a laugh that isn’t a laugh, “- I guess my blood really doesn’t mean I’m brave.” 

Ballister scoffs, then uses his bandaged hand to tilt Ambrosius’s head so he can meet his eyes. They’re not hard and cold, like he’d been expecting. They’re sad, which is maybe worse. “You are brave,” he says, then, “Thank you for telling me. If - when you get back to where you came from, you should say all that to the other me. I think it will help.”

[zyrafowe-sny]

is the cop or am I the one that's really dangerous

Ambrosius says, "Because I love you," and Ballister's (aching, concussed) brain tries to comprehend love without trust, love with reservation, love that takes the twisted words of others over the bone-deep knowledge that comes from a shared life.

"Just promise to think about it, Bal. She's dangerous." Ambrosius retrieves the fallen sword and scroll and shoves them in his hands.

This time Ballister keeps them — putting his sword on his belt on auto-pilot — but that doesn't stop him from running off.

(And his newfound friendship with Nimona doesn't stop him from at least considering the words of his oldest friend and the man he can't help but love despite it all.)

He knows she couldn't possibly have orchestrated the assassination. She would have needed a second shapeshifter to pretend to be the Director to fake that confession — or split herself in two somehow — and either option seems both unlikely and altogether a far too complicated plan for little miss "something something we win".

Unless that was all a ruse to throw him off and she's actually a tactical genius.

He thinks of her delight in chaos and destruction. He thinks of how many knights she's injured (killed? modern armor is strong but not invulnerable). He thinks of all the innocent bystanders she put in harm's way. And that girl in the monster in the scroll looks uncannily like the girl he grabbed from atop a stolen motorhorse.

Could Nimona really be Gloreth's monster? Could she have destroyed their city when it was in its infancy? Did she want to burn it to the ground again? Is she capable of sowing (false) distrust to make the Kingdom harder to defend when she makes her big move? Did she identify him as the weak link in the Institute that would bring it all down?

(Maybe he's questioning everything now, but her loneliness seems real. He can believe she wants an ally, someone to talk to, someone to fight with, even if she always just planned on using him.)

Ballister's still lost when he finds himself back at the tower.

Nimona's sleeping so peacefully — especially compared to her earlier nightmares — but he hardens his heart as she wakes.

He wants answers.

She doesn't really give them.

All his darkest doubts spill out.

Ballister never does manage to say the m-word, but his actions speak louder than his tongue ever could. He sees her glowing eyes and hears the sound of his sword leaving its sheath. His own eyes dart between Nimona and his hands, and he can't believe what he was about to do to the frightened girl in front of him.

As Nimona would say, he was brainwashed good.

And apparently he's also an enormous hypocrite. (Maybe he judged Ambrosius a little too harshly for not believing he was innocent. Or maybe they both have much to learn about love and trust and who the monsters really are.)

"I-"

He fully intends to apologize for being small-minded (again), for clinging to a thousand year old story instead of trusting the (possibly thousand year old) teenager actually in front of him, but then there are voices outside before he can even start to find the right words.

He doesn't know how Todd found his hideout — was he followed from the city? — but that doesn't matter. To his relief, Nimona disappears in a shimmer of light and escapes before the knight notices. (Maybe someday they'll meet again and he'll be able to make up for his betrayal, but following her now will just put her in more danger.)

The beating feels like a fitting punishment. He just hopes he can stay conscious long enough that she'll be long gone before they think to continue the search. With any luck, she'll find some peace far away from this cursed kingdom.

But then the world shakes and he sees the birds fly away as shadows loom. And he knows the hurt is too strong and too deep and too old for her to just make a clean break, a fresh start.

It doesn't take long for him to recognize a death march.

He knew she had suicidal thoughts. He knew it and still he questioned her motivations and their friendship and her personhood. He knew it and pressed just the right buttons that would hurt her the most.

Maybe Gloreth's statue will drive the physical blow, but he's the one sticking a sword through Nimona's heart because she's different.

Unless he can get there in time.

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this, please consider liking, reblogging, or hopping over to AO3 to leave a kudo or comment.

[the-oc-lass]

Nimona OC - Charlotte Swiftheart/Corova

Alright, here I am. I've had a weird but semi-productive day. Oh well. Here's the second half of that drabble that I don't know if it can be called a drabble anymore because it's not very short.

First, Previous, Next

We continue...

"You've got two minutes," she says. Ambrosius's eyes widen slightly, almost as if he expected her to say no and walk away. But he quickly straightens, and clears his throat.

"After your mom's funeral, I went to the Director to try to convince her to let you back into the Institute. I tried to do what I promised. I told her that you deserved to be there more than most of the people there, more than me, and I told her that I didn't care if it got out that you were my sister, that I'd tell people myself if that's what I needed to do. And when she still wouldn't budge, I told her that if you weren't there, then I didn't want to be either," he says. Her eyebrows shoot up in surprise, then furrow together as she steps away from the wall.

"You...Threatened to leave the Institute?" she asks. He nods slowly.

"I knew that if I left the Institute, people would be upset about it. I was just trying to force her hand. I wasn't serious. Or maybe I was, I just...I wasn't thinking. I was upset at the way you'd been treated, and I missed you." He looks away. "It didn't matter. She didn't even call my bluff, she..." He trails off, and Charlotte begins to take a few steps closer to him. Ballister settles a hand on his boyfriend's arm.

"She what, Ambrosius?" he asks gently. Ambrosius sighs, shoulders sagging as he looks up again, gaze settling on Ballister this time.

"She said that she'd noticed how the others treated you, Bal. She noticed how close we were, and talked about how...unfortunate it would be if I left, because then you'd be left to face their torment on your own. She said that she couldn't be everywhere at once, that she worried that something would happen. And I didn't know what to do because she knew I wouldn't abandon you, and there was no way I could ask you to put all your hard work at risk," he says. A guilty expression appears on his face as he looks down again. "Not even for Charlotte." Charlotte's arms uncross, and she's much closer now, practically shoulder to shoulder with Ballister.

"Ambrosius, she manipulated and blackmailed you. She used Bal against you. Why did you never tell me?" she asks. Ballister's grasp on his arm shifts down to take his hand.

"And why did you never tell me any of this? Why lie and say that Charlotte left?" he asks. Ambrosius looks back up at him, then over at her.

"I meant to come find you and tell you that I couldn't keep my promise. I was going to tell you as soon as I left her office. But...As I was leaving, she said that people had noticed Bal and I at your mom's funeral, and the rumors were getting louder. They were causing problems. She said that I shouldn't be seen around you anymore. If I was, she told me that she was afraid people would be able to put the pieces together, and she'd be unable to deny the rumors of us being related any further. She said that a scandal like that, with my family name, it would be catastrophic for my family and the Institute. She feared that people would want me kicked out of the Institute, and that would be even worse for Bal."

"So you agreed to stay away from me," she finishes. The guilt in his eyes looks like it's threatening to drown him, and his expression is pained.

"I didn't mean for it to be forever. I just wanted to let the rumors die out, then I could find you again. But by the time I went back to your old house...You were gone." He turns to look at Ballister. "And I lied to you because I didn't want you to feel guilty. None of what happened was your fault, but I knew that you'd feel like it was. You loved Charlotte and wanted her back just as much as I did, and I...I couldn't face you with the decision I'd made." She sees Ballister tilt his head, expression soft and concerned.

"Ambrosius..." She doesn't hear the rest. The Director manipulated and blackmailed Ambrosius into abandoning her. No, not abandon. Abandonment needs intent. He didn't want to leave her. He tried to come back. But she was gone by then. She nearly throws the basket of apples still clutched in her hand.

"That witch!" she exclaims, causing both of the men to jump. They look over at her, and she gingerly drops her basket as she starts to rant, gesturing sharply with her hands. "I spent six years thinking the only people I had left abandoned me all because of her! Six years festering in grudges that I couldn't really hold! Six years trying to resent every success you had. Good Gloreth, I spent six years torn between being hurt and angry and still wanting nothing more than to be back up in that stupid ivory tower with you two! Because above everything else, you were my best friends and I hated every second that I wasn't at your sides. And she took that from me! She took-"

"Char." The sudden grasp on her forearms and the familiar old nickname send her brain grinding to a halt. Ballister looks up at her with warm, calloused hands holding onto her. He rubs small circles there, and for a moment, she's eleven again. It used to be something they both did to ground her when they were young. "Breathe." She takes a slow, deep breathe, then blows it out slowly.

"You called me Char," she says. He smiles a bit.

"You called me Bal." She smiles back at him, then catches a glimpse of Ambrosius over his shoulder. He looks like he's about to cry. She tilts her head and gives him a soft look. This isn't at all how she expected or imagined this to go, but she can't bring herself to complain. This is better than anything she ever thought up. Ballister releases her with one hand and turns to look at Ambrosius, and Charlotte opens her arms a bit.

"Come he-" She doesn't even get to finish her sentence before she's being swept into Ambrosius's arms. Her brother's arms. She's back with him. With both of them. Things aren't fixed, and they have a lot of catching up to do, but this is a good start.

Don't worry, she gets to hug Ballister too after Ambrosius has been coaxed into giving him a turn. Then they both hug her and some tears are shed and some mushy stuff is said about missing each other.

Lovely tagged people:

@ammonitetheseaserpent @perfectkittystranger @derellenbogen

[xandriagreat]

Ballister | Chapter 7

Prologue | Last Chapter | Next Chapter

Author's note: A huge thanks to @vanessafangirl13 for helping with this chapter.

Notice/warnings: food/eating, attack, shocking, passing out/knock out, wounds/scars, falling, crying, ANGST

▪︎▪︎▪︎

Nimona stretched as she walked down the stairs in the morning.

“Good morning, Bal-” she started but stopped when she noticed that Ballister wasn’t on the couch.

Nimona looked around where Ballister could be, but he wasn’t in any of the places.

“Hm… Where are you?” Nimona called out, looking around. Then she noticed that the chair that normally had Ballister’s satchel wasn’t there. Nimona’s eyes widened as she had a feeling that something had happened.

‘Oh please don’t be where I think you are.’ she thought worriedly, grabbing an apple before getting her medium size pole, black cloak, and black scarf face mask.

She looked at the painting of the family and glared at it before she ran out. "Don't give me that look." she growled to the people of the painting as if they were alive.

◇

As the sun rose up in the sky, The Director and Gloreth rode in The Director’s private hover car.

Gloreth was looking out the window while The Director was working on some work on her work tablet.

The Director glace up from her work and noticed Gloreth looked like she had something on her mind and had a sad look on her face. 

“Is something on your mind, Captain?” The Director asked, turning off her work tablet. The Director smiled softly at the young woman as she said, “You can talk to me.”

Gloreth just sighed softly as she looked at The Director. 

‘My mind? I’ve lost my mind. I’ve lost everything. The woman I love, my best friend… although, now, apparently, she’s got a new best friend. What’s that about? What else is she hiding? Who’s the real her? Who am I? A Goldenloin? A Direct Descendent of Ambrosius? I never asked for that. Now everyone expects me to arrest Nimona. If I don’t, I'm a traitor to you! But if I do, I'm a traitor to her! Oh and on top of that I pointed a weapon at her instead of putting out the fire that was on her! She got burned because of me! Why didn’t I help?! Because I was trained to?! POINTING A WEAPON INSTEAD OF HELPING IS NOT A LOVE LANGUAGE-!’ Gloreth thought of what she wanted to say. But instead of saying all of that, she said, “I’m fine, Director…”

Gloreth went back to looking out the window.

The Director stared at Gloreth for a moment before getting back to work on her work tablet.

They stayed quiet for the rest of the ride.

They soon arrived at the Institute.

Gloreth helped The Director out of the hover car when the car stopped at the front of the Institute. 

As the car left, both women noticed that the Institute looked dark on the inside, which was strange because the lights were always on.

“This feels a lot like when the Crimsonthorn family attacked…” The Director said under her breath, still looking at the Institute.

Gloreth nodded, remembering that dark night.

“We’ll need backup.” Gloreth said, grabbing the hilt of her sword.

“I’ll call for backup.” The Director said.

◇

Gloreth takes in a breath and gets her sword out as she carefully goes inside the dark Institute, preparing herself to fight.

She got her sword to light up a bit to see in the dark. 

With the soft blue and yellow light from her sword, Gloreth was able to see a bit as she walked carefully.

There were a lot of knocked out knights, guards, and scientists laying around on the floor.

“What happened here?” Gloreth asked herself as she looked around more, confused.

Gloreth walked into an atrium to see nothing but darkness. The only light that was there was from her sword and some light peeking out from the covered windows.

But then the next thing she knew was that someone jumped out of the shadows, about to hit Gloreth with a pole.

Gloreth was able to block it with her sword.

CLANG!

With the light from her sword, Gloreth was able to see the person.

It was Nimona.

“Nim?” Gloreth breath, confused.

Nimona only growled at her in response as shoved her back and was about to parry.

Gloreth quickly dodged it and was about to slash at Nimona.

The burnt knight blocked it with the pole.

CLANG!

The two knights start to have a sword and pole fight.

CLANG!

CLANG!

CLANG!

Before Gloreth could move slash, Nimona blocked it and then she kicked Gloreth in the chest, making her fall to the ground.

Gloreth dropped her sword as she hit the ground. 

Before Gloreth could get up, Nimona grabbed the sword and pointed at her as if to say ‘stay down’.

“Nim-” Gloreth started but was interrupted by Nimona asking in a growl, “Where is he?”

The golden knight looked at the burned knight, confused. “What? Who? Where is who?”

“My sidekick. The teen.” Nimona growled, her eyes narrowed at her.

Gloreth stares at her, thinking of a way to calm Nimona down.

“I- ok… I don’t know where your sidekick is.” Gloreth said calmly, trying to defuse the situation.

“I know that he’s here!” Nimona said angrily, still pointing the sword at her.

“What makes you say that?” Gloreth asked, trying to understand.

Nimona looked away and sighed before looking back at Gloreth again. “We… My sidekick and I… found some evidence to show that I'm innocent a few days ago. My sidekick wanted to show you the evidence but I told him no. Sometimes he listens. Sometimes he doesn’t.” the burnt knight explained.

Gloreth nodded, sort of understanding. “Okay… but why does your sidekick want to show me? Why not you?” 

“I didn’t want to… because we don’t have all of the evidence… But we know who.” Nimona said, lowering the sword.

Gloreth’s eyes widened with possibility. “Who?” she asked, about to get up but stopped as Nimona pointed the sword at her again.

Gloreth could see the anger and fear in Nimona’s eyes as the burnt knight was quiet for a moment. “Hey, hey, hey… it’s ok. I know that you’re not a murrder.” Gloreth said in a calm tone, trying to get Nimona to open up without triggering anything. “You’re not your family.”

Nimona’s cold narrowed eyes softened with emotion as she looked at her and swallowed a lump in her throat.

“It was The Director. The Director killed the Queen-” Nimona started but then was cut off but an electrified net was shot out and hit her, making her drop the sword.

It knocked her to the ground as it wrapped around her and shocked her so much that it made her shake.

“No!” Gloreth exclaimed in horror. 

She quickly pulled on her gloves before quickly going to Nimona and she got the net off of her.

Nimona stopped shaking from the shock when the net was off and laid still on the ground.

Gloreth checked her pulse.

Nimona’s pulse was still beating.

Gloreth sighed in relief, knowing that Nimona is still alive.

Then she frowned as she heard Todd’s annoying voice call out, “Is she dead?”

The golden knight stood up and turned around to see The Director and the backup.

The backup had just arrived. 

“No, she’s alive.” Gloreth said, looking at the backup.

“Dang it.” some of the knights said under their breaths.

Gloreth heard that and glared at them. “We need her alive, so we could question her.” she said sternly.

The knight looked at her, confused. 

“Um… when we first got her arrested, we were planning on getting her execution ready.” one of the knights said, raising his hand.

Gloreth couldn’t believe what she heard. “Who told you to do that?”

Before the knight could say anything, The Director said, "Let's just take her and deal with her when she wakes up."

Gloreth took in a breath and sighed. “Okay… But let's get everyone who knocked out to medbay to check on them, including Nimona. Then we’ll take Nimona in questioning.” the golden knight said to the knights.

“What is there to question?" Todd said, looking confused.

Gloreth glared at him as she picked up her sword from the ground while The Director walked over to her.

But before the knights could do anything, a voice from the shadows called out, “Stop.”

Everyone was startled by that and looked up to see on the balcony of the second flooring was the teen who helped Nimona with the jailbreak.

“You!” The Director growled, glaring at him.

All the knights pointed their weapons at the teen.

The teen didn’t look scared or startled by this. He just looked at everyone with a deadpan look, like he expected this. Then he looked at the knocked out Nimona, the deadpan look became a concerned look.

“Nimona didn’t do it. She didn’t kill the queen. The Director did it.” the teen said loud and clear. 

“That’s a lie.” The Director said loudly.

The golden knight was unsure of who was telling the truth.

“We have proof.” the teen said, getting his satchel.

As he started to open it, The Director shouted “He’s got a weapon!”

Before the teen could show the proof, a bolt was shot and it hit the teen’s shoulder, making him stumble back.

Gloreth looked at who shot the teen.

It was Todd.

“Thoddeus!” she shouted at him.

“What? I stopped him.” Todd exclaimed, pointing a hand at the teen.

Gloreth glared at him for a moment before she stopped glaring as she realized that something wasn’t right.

She looked up at the balcony with the other knights

The teen looked down at all of them with a deadly look. 

The strange thing was that he didn’t look like he was in pain, just angry.

Then the teen did something unexpected as he looked at the bolt that was in his shoulder. He grabbed the bolt and took it out of his shoulder, not screaming in pain. 

The knights tried to remain calm.

‘Why isn't he screaming in pain?’ Gloreth thought, staring at the teen while trying not to get too bit weirded out.

The teen rubbed the wound on his shoulder as if it was nothing but a sore muscle. Then the teen looked back at the knights but this time, his eyes were glowing.

Gloreth could hear some knight gasp while everyone tried to stay calm.

‘This kid isn’t human.’ she thought as she pointed her sword at him and forced herself to ask, “What are you?”

The teen looked at Gloreth and gave a cheek smile. “I’m Ballister.” he said before jumping over the heavy railing.

◇

Ballister started to shapeshift before he landed on the floor and transformed into a gorilla.

Everyone gasped and couldn’t believe their eyes when seeing that he could shapeshift.

Ballister slams his fists into the ground and roars at the knights, making some of the knights fall on the ground.

Then he charged at them.

◇

The roar woke Nimona up.

Nimona slowly sat up to see Ballister fighting the knights in his many different animal forms.

First he transformed into a gorilla (tossing some knights to the side), then wolf (jumping onto some knights to knock them down), and then ostrich (kicking some more knights down).

Nimona noticed that a knight was about to shoot at Ballister with an electrified net. She grabbed a crossbow from a knocked out knight, pointed it at the knight who was about to shoot at Ballister, and shot in the knight’s kneecap, making the knight exclaim in pain and fall to the ground.

“Bal!” Nimona shouted as she got up and picked up the pole.

Ballister looked at Nimona and ran to her as he shapeshifted into a rhino. 

“We’re getting out of here!” Ballister said, tossing her up in the air and Nimona laid on his back.

Nimona clung onto him as Ballister ran fast. “What happened?!” the burnt knight asked angrily.

“I was about to show evidence but I got shot and it made me angry! Don't worry! The evidence is fine! I’ll tell you more later! But right now we need to get out of here!” Ballister shouted, running to the entrice and knocking the doors down.

Ballister ran to the edge of the platform and jumped over, shapeshifting into a dragon. 

Nimona clung onto Ballister as they flew up into the sky.

It looked like they were about to get away.

But then an electrified net was shot at Ballister’s left wing. It wrapped around it and shocked him, making him scream in pain.

“Bal!” Nimona screamed in worry.

He stopped flying and they both started to fall. 

Nimona fell off of Ballister’s back as the shapeshifter ripped the net off of his wing even though it hurt too much. Then he quickly grabbed Nimona and held her close to his chest to protect her as he turned his back to the ground.

◇

When Ballister hit the ground of the street, the ground shook so hard that it would have been confused with an earthquake.

Ballister let go of Nimona as he breathed heavily.

“Bal?” Nimona asked worriedly, looking up at Balister.

The shapeshifter groaned a bit and slowly sat up, looking at the burnt knight.

“You ok?” Ballister asked.

“I’m fine but what about you?!” Nimona exclaimed, still worried.

Before Ballister could say anything, a knight shouted, “There they are!”

Ballister and Nimona looked at where the shout came from and saw knights exiting the Institute building and ran to them. 

“We need to get out of here.” Nimona said, getting off of Ballsiter.

“I’ll distract them while you get us a ride.” Ballister said, looking at Nimona.

The burnt knight looked at the shapeshifter, who gave her a reassuring smile and nodded as if to say ‘It’ll be ok’.

Nimona nodded back and she ran to find a ride.

Ballister got up to block the broken gate of the Institute as he shifted his dragon form to the dragon mascot for Dragon Krispies.

The knights stopped running and looked at the current different form with wide eyes.

“Kwispy!” Todd exclaimed excitedly, pointing at Ballister before he quickly became confused. “Wait- what?”

“Hope you brought milk!” Ballister roars at the knights.

“Nope! Go go go go-!” Todd shouted at the knights, trying to run to the building.

Then Ballister breathes a jet of Dragon Krispies cereal at the knights, hitting them and making them slip and fall on the bits.

Ballister stopped breathing out the cereal when all knights were down. “Bam-boom!” Ballister said with a laugh, taking a few steps back from the gate.

Then he felt eyes looking at him.

He turned around to see people that were nearby looking at him. 

All of them had terror and fear on their faces. 

A familiar look that Ballister has seen when people see a monster.

Then the sirens began alerting everyone around the area. "Monster attack. Monster attack. Seek immediate shelter." An automatic voice said from the speakers.

A lot of people ran to safety.

As Ballister panted heavily and looked around, he noticed little kids looking up at him with terror on their faces.

Ballister figured that his current form was scaring them.

Ballister shapeshifted into a 6 year old boy version of his teen self. He was wearing an old light gray shirt and brown pants. He also had a red scarf around his neck. His black hair was short to his ears. There were still streaks of light blue and dark indigo. His robotic prosthetic was a golden yellow instead of the normal black.

“It’s ok…” Ballister reassured, showing his hands to them that he's not going to hurt them.

“…immediate shelter! Monster attack! Monster attack!”

The kids still had fear on their faces when looking at him.

One of the kids pointed their wooden toy sword at him and said, “M-monster…”

That broke Ballister’s heart and felt trigger pain for a deep emotional wound that he has.

The kids’ parents quickly grabbed the kids and ran off with them while Ballister fell onto his knees.

Everything started to become loud to him.

“MONSTER ATTACK! MONSTER ATTACK! SEEK IMMEDIATE SHELTER!”

Ballister covered his ears to block out the sound and started to cry. He didn’t notice Gloreth running to him.

But before Gloreth could get to him, Nimona speeds in on a hover-bike and scoops Ballister up.

“Don’t worry, I  gotcha, kid!” Nimona said to Ballister, holding him close in one arm while continuing to drive off with her other hand driving.

The loud sounds faded away from him as they got away from the panic and chaos.

◇

Nimona abandoned the hover-bike when they got to the edge of the woods and continued the journey back to the mansion on foot, still carrying Ballister.

At one point during the walk into the woods, Nimona looked at Ballister, who was still in his child form. She noticed that he had something on his mind and he looked really hurt.

“Are you okay?” Nimona asked, worriedly.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Ballister mumbled, looking down.

Nimona nodded but something inside her just wanted to know what’s wrong. “I know that something’s bothering you.” Nimona said as she stopped walking. “So please, tell me-”

"I said I don’t wanna talk about it!" Ballister shouted at her.

He shoves her away, making the burnt knight stumble back, as Ballister starts to shapeshift to his normal teen self. But instead of landing on his feet, the teen faceplated onto the ground, making him groan in pain.

Nimona looks at the teen in shock and worry. She slowly walked over to him and knelt down. “Hey, hey, hey… I’m just trying to help.” Nimona said softly.

Ballister just laid still for a moment before he slowly got up to sit on his knees and look at the ground.

There were tears peaking at Ballister’s eyes.

“You… should have seen the way that those little kids looked at me…” Ballister started, sniffing. “The fear in their eyes with a hint of bravery as one of them pointed that sword at me before being taken away by their parents…”

Nimona just looks at Ballister, listening to him as the teen continued, “Kids... Little kids. They grow up believing that they can be a hero if they drive a sword into the heart of anything different…” 

Then Ballister looked at Nimona, tears now streaming down his face. “And everyone says that I’m the monster?” Ballister exclaimed, hugging himself as he looked down again. “I don’t know what’s scarier… The fact that everyone in this kingdom wants to run a sword through my heart… Or that sometimes… I just want to let them…”

Nimona was devastated when hearing this.

Slowly, she gently put a gentle hand on his back.

Ballister leaned into the touch, calming down.

Nimona looked around and noticed the wall in the distance through the trees, starting to get an idea.

“We’ll go over the wall.” Nimona said to Ballister, which got the teen’s attention and looked at her. “We won’t stop until we find someplace safe. Okay? We’ll go. Together.”

“What?” the teen asked to see if she’s serious.

Nimona nodded as she looked at him. “It’s dangerous for us here.” the burnt knight started. “But if we leave, we’ll-”

“No, we can’t leave.” the teen interrupted, sounding worried.

“What? Why not?” the burnt knight asked, confused.

“Because something bad normally happens!” 

Nimona looked at Ballister, confused, while the teen sighed and looked at the burnt knight.

“Look, if we leave now and don't clear your name, you'll be hunted down. Gloreth, along with how many knights she'll take with her, will hunt us down, hunt you down. But sooner or later, someone gets hurt.” Ballister explained sadly like it has happened before, looking down. 

Nimona nodded in understanding.

“We also can’t let the Director get away with this.” Ballister added, looking at Nimona again. “And you made a deal with me. We clear your name, you make me your sidekick. And you can’t back out on a deal because you believe in truth and honor, right?”

“Right.” Nimona said with a chuckle.

The both of them laugh softly for a moment.

Nimona starts to think of a plan and smiles when she gets it.

“We need The Director to confess. Then we’ll post the evidence. It’ll start a rebellion to take down The Director.” Nimona said, looking at Ballister.

“Ok, but what’s the plan?”

“I think you’ll like it.” Nimona said with a smile. “It’s Something something something…”

Ballister’s eyes widened with excitement as he finished, “We win!”

Nimona nodded and chuckled.

Ballister got so excited that he tried to get up but ended up faceplating on the ground again, like his body was saying ‘Nope, we're done moving around today’.

Nimona looked at Ballister for a moment before she said, “We’ll do it tomorrow. Right now, let’s get back home and rest. We did a lot today.”

Ballister raised his black robotic prosthetic and gave a thumbs up, letting her know that he got it. Then he lifted his head to look at her and asked, “Do you think that you could carry me? I think my body just gave up on me.”

Nimona nodded and carefully picked up Ballister and put him on her back, giving him a piggyback ride. 

The burnt knight slowly got up as the teen held onto her. Then Nimona continued the walk back to the mansion, talking with Ballister on the way.

◇

When they got back to the mansion, Nimona took Ballister to a guest bedroom and put him on the bed.

Ballister’s reaction when noticing that the bed is soft and warm was cute and funny. His eyes widened and he smiled as he rested in the bed.

Nimona took off the boots and put them on the ground. “Need anything?” she asked, putting the blanket over Ballister.

The teen thought for a moment before shaking his head and said, “No but thank you.”

The burnt knight nodded. “Alright. Get some sleep and rest. I’ll make some soup later.”

Ballister nodded with a tired smile and yawned before falling asleep.

Nimona smiled softly and sighs softly as she leaves the room, gently closing the door. 

She went to her room so she could get changed into more comfortable clothes.

After she changed into her normal clothes, she looked at her reflection in the mirror and looked at her burnt arm.

She noticed that her burnt arm looked better, like it was healing a bit.

“Hm… interesting.” Nimona hummed, touching her arm and gently rubbing it.

Then she went to lay down on her bed and took a quick nap.

Nimona felt better when she woke up from her nap and went to the kitchen to get soup cooking.

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

short but chaotic Nimona headcanons

One time the boys were going through their baby pictures and laughing

And Nimona let it slip that she doesn’t have any baby pictures cause she was never a baby 

The boys being dramatic sappy dorks plan a whole day where they take stupid family photos 

And Bal being the most dramatic sentimental dork of all even goes as far as photoshopping Nimona into some of their old photos 

These photos were just supposed to be a cute little inside joke that they framed in their living room they never expected anyone to see them

But as time goes on and they make more friends people see those photos and draw their own conclusions 

And maybe Bal is incredible with Photoshop or maybe no one in the kingdom has critical thinking skills because people start to believe Bal and Ambrosius raised Nimona

There is a tw*tter thread of them commending Bal and Ambrosius for training to be knights and saving the day all while raising a child

Someone was talking to Nimona and congratulated her on being so brave

And Nimona was like “Oh you mean the battle with the director?” the person goes "Well yeah that too but I was also talking about your parent's split divorce can be so messy"

Most people know this is just a long drawn out joke that the trio doesn’t have the willpower to debunk

And some people are out here defending this story posting shit like “No a friend of a friend was at the institute at the same time and saw them with Nimona” 

The trio thinks it's fucking hilarious so they never bother to comment on it

In fact they didn't correct anyone until Nimona told the real story of Gloreth’s “Monster”

And they were really dragging their feet on telling people not because they were afraid of the backlash but because they knew the teen parent stories would stop 

Everyone is fully convinced that Ambrosius is the best secret keeper of all time 

He’s fucking not 

He’s a gossipy little bitch but the people who he gossips with are the real vaults 

Whenever he wants to gossip he'll talk to Nimona

And Nimona always drops his gossip onto Bal because he knows Bal will tell Ambrosius  

Bal usually doesn’t gossip but if Ambrosius asks him “What’s on your mind love?” more than once he’s an open book 

But the gossip never leaves their little trio no matter what 

Whenever the trio gets bored like on errand days or long car rides they’ll play a little game 

Basically they compare people they know to random objects or animals 

And they win depending on how accurate the object is or if it makes the other two laugh

Some of the accurate wins were Ambrosius pointing at a wet cat and commenting that it reminded him of Bal, Bal pointing at dog shit and saying “Look it’s Todd”, and Nimona asking “When did the director come back to life?” while pointing at flaming garbage 

And then there are the other answers like when Bal pointed at the air and said “Mom” Ambrosius just turns to him and goes “Bal you didn’t know your mom” and he just goes “Yeah that’s what she looks like in my mind” 

Or Ambrosius pointed at a cemetery and exclaimed “Mom!” And Bal goes “Love your Moms alive” and all he says is “Shh Bal let me manifest” 

[weaversong]

I just watched Nimona last night and I absolutely adored it so I'm just listing everything I loved because I can't make a formal thought post rn. It's a lot so click the magic button to see it

- The scene where the Director pulled out that thousand year old scroll to justify her murderous intent towards Nimona. And the way my first thought was "wait is this like the Bible or the Constitution?" because damn bigots have a habit of using centuries-outdated documents to persecute people

- The flashback with Gloreth and Nimona. Oh my god bro. I think there's a lot of ways you can see that scene but I saw it the lesbian way. And if you're lesbian you get what I'm saying. When you love a girl so much and you're like two peas in a pod with each other but then realize they never saw you the same way and you were never more than just a friend...

- The way Nimona never transformed into the monster depicted in all that art. The way that the village burned not because of her but the villagers surrounding her with torches. And this same thing happens later during Nimona's attempt; almost none of the damage to the city was caused by her but by everyone hurting her and destroying everything just to destroy her. Fuck bro

- Speaking of the attempt sequence, Nimona's shadowy form sounding completely and utterly human got me. How all the knights kept shooting at her is beyond me. Because you wouldn't expect to strike a giant shadow "monster" and its scream to be a little girl's scream. Her final scream in that scene right as she was at the sword's tip made me burst into tears

- There's a lot of things I like about Ballister but I need to make the joke about his big brown eyes real quick... great addition. Can't imagine looking at him and seeing queen-murdering thoughts behind those eyes

- The way Ballister was ready to pack it up and go the moment Nimona admitted how scared she was of the kingdom hurting her. The way he was ready to leave everything he ever knew behind just to protect this girl. Oh my god

- Ambrosius immediately deducing that the Ballister on the cameras was an imposter because he knows Bal hates freestyle jazz. Choked on my own spit

- Fucking RUPAUL voicing one of the commentators of the knighting ceremony

- Nimona herself being incredibly trans in every way possible is already made clear but I ADORE how she doesn't bend to make anyone comfortable. There's a real message here about cis queer people trying to be "the good ones" by putting down trans people who "make the community look bad", when at the end of the day, they hate us all and it doesn't stop at trans people. The way Nimona makes it clear that the kingdom doesn't hate her any more than they hate Ballister. Bal's desperate "be discreet" attitude eventually developing into "let's break stuff". No point in trying to appeal to bigots and he learned that lesson. A lot of y'all could learn from his development all I'm saying

- I really love all of Nimona's different forms but the ostrich made me laugh when I first saw it because I remembered the WikiHow article on how to survive an ostrich encounter and one of the strategies is just "dive into a thorn bush". I can't draw like that but artists if you need a silly prompt that's mine

- The propaganda. Oh my god the propaganda. Already kinda talked about this with Gloreth but Nimona's short monologue about how impressionable little kids think they're righteous for wiping out anyone "other" was chilling. Because she's right

- In the scene where Ballister and Nimona check their upload of the Director's confession, it's brief but you can see a comment that questions if it's some sort of deepfake. Now I know this movie was in development quite some years ago (hence the dancing shark scene) but that's a little too accurate to how common deepfakes have become since the rise of AI recently. Made me wonder how common deepfakes must be in this kingdom and who exactly utilizes them (definitely not the Institute for their propaganda...)

- The queen. She was cool and all for the 5 minutes she was alive onscreen and was genuinely trying to make progress but she just reminds me of real lawmakers. The "good ones" never stick around for long, unfortunately, and the ones who you think are on your side will ditch you if they need votes. How it's all a problem with the system itself, and one good person inside the system isn't going to change anything

- When Nimona said "metallllll" and she threw up the horns I got so happy. I'm a huge metalhead so anytime I see the horns done right I get happy. Remember it's WITHOUT the thumb sticking out!!!

- There's a certain song inclusion that really tugged at my metal heartstrings... but I wanna make a full post on that. Gonna do that right after I post this

- Lastly, this movie is BOLD. It's unflinching. Like its titular character, it doesn't CARE to make you comfortable. You WILL see these queer men express their love for each other in the opening scene. You WILL watch them kiss. You WILL watch Nimona act loud and defiant no matter how much stealth (pun NOT intended) a mission calls for. Truly some amazing stuff

That's all I got go watch this movie rn

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

I’m gonna keep writing Nimona headcanons til someone stops me cause they’ve taken over my life

Ambrosius was forced to suppress his emotions basically his whole life 

He used to be one of those guys who would say shit like “I haven’t cried in 15 years”

But not as like a weird subtle brag just as stating a fact which made it more depressing 

Once the wall came down it’s like the floodgates opened this man will cry when he’s happy sad angry stressed 

You name it he’s crying 

And he’s not a pretty crier either which is funny cause there is a whole compilation of “Ambrosius being unreasonably photogenic” 

Bal was the typical crybaby growing up 

He was constantly bullied for it and it only got worse when he was at the institute 

A lot of his classmates and teachers would try and be “helpful” and give him tips to stop crying  

Ambrosius was the only one who encouraged him to cry and deal with all his emotions 

It’s pretty rare to see Bal cry now but it happens occasionally when he’s sad or stressed or really happy  

Seeing Nimona cry is a rare phenomenon 

Bal and Ambrosius have only ever seen her cry four times 

The first was when they were on Gloreth’s statue at the end of the movie, the second Gloreth’s statue was fully taken down, the third was when the adoption paperwork was finalized and the fourth was their wedding 

But she denies it literally every single time 

Pinky promises are sacred for the trio

Back when the boys were training they would only make pinky promises about big things 

And if they broke those promises there would be big consequences like giving up your dessert for two months 

It was a habit that Bal subconsciously passed onto Nimona 

The trio never really talked about it but there was a silent mutual understanding that they held weight

The first pink promise Ambrosius ever made was right after Nimona started trusting him and had enough respect for him to hold a conversation without hissing 

And he swore that he would never consciously hurt Bal or Nimona again 

Nimona made a joke about that being a big promise to make 

And Ambrosius said “That’s why it’s a pinky promise”

I feel like Bal and Ambrosius never tried to hide their relationship the kingdom is just stupid 

They were highly encouraged by the staff and family to keep it under wraps but they said fuck that noise I wanna hold my boyfriend's hand in public 

The fellow knights in training knew something was up but they didn’t figure it out until the wall fell

Todd was the most outspoken when they first started dating he used to go around and tell people “No one looks at their bro like that”

After a while they stopped giving a fuck and they didn’t really have enough time or energy to ask because they were too busy getting their asses handed to them by the boys 

A lot of citizens had this weird misconception that they had this heated and bitter rivalry 

There were entire articles written about how they were “The rivals of the century” 

And the boys would get together and dramatically read every single one of them

Whenever the boys were in a bad mood they would reference the articles like this 

“Hey sunshine did you know I joined the institute specifically to dethrone you?” “You know what moonbeam I didn’t but thanks for telling me” 

“Bal I just want you to know that I am utterly seething at the cruel defeat by your hand” “Oh I’m so sorry love I’ll make sure to kick your ass nicer next time”

[madlad-sadgal]

More things I noticed in Nimona because I got boredin.

Nimona Spoilers!

Diamonds seem to be a recurring form when it comes to the Institute, which we see most when in the Director's office. There's a line of diamonds that goes from the top to the bottom of her dress. The windows are diamonds. There's a diamond at the tip of her staff. There's a diamond sculpture thingy on her desk. There's a line of diamonds on the side of her desk. Ambrosius also has a a lot of diamonds on his armor. The button the Director presses to open the secret drawer is part of a line of diamonds. The Director's eye shine is a diamond, and so is Bal's when he's about to be knighted, about to become an official part of the Institute, only to have that taken away from him.

I hear a lot of people say that they don't understand why Bal didn't post the whole video, but we have to take in consideration here: When he and Nimona thought up that plan, in no way did they think that the Director would actually try to kill Ambrosius. And, also, Nimona-Ambrosius and Ambrosius both enter the office by saying the same thing "We need to talk". Bal probably spent hours telling them how Ambrosius acted just to fool the Director. Just imagine: you see someone who looks and acts exactly like the one you love get stabbed out of absolutely nowhere. You know it's not them, but there's still that small second of "What the fuck my lover is getting stabbed!" I doubt he was able to keep the camera still through all that. I saw another post talk about it, and I can't find it, but yeah.

Also, back to Ambrosius' armor, I was able to count three lion faces on it. One on the front of his chestplate, and one of each of his shoulder protector thingys (I don't know the name of it)

Sure, when Nimona-Ambrosius destroys everything in the Director's office, it's funny, but they also foreshadow one more thing; destroying the wall. Also, they remove Gloreth's statue at the same time, and, at the end, when Bal is looking over the kingdom, we don't see the statue in question anywhere, which could maybe insinuate that they actually did canonically took it down? I may be looking into this too much, but it's fun to think that's what it might mean.

The sight Bal uploads the video is called "TheCrier". Also, when he uploads it, on the screen behind the computer, you can see he was previously ordering a pizza.

Bal's username is BalliSTAR12 and honestly I'm surprised no one in the kingdom thought to question why this man even had a video of this. That is if they even realized that it was him because let's be honest, the people of the realm are oblivious to a lot of stuff throughout the movie.

For a brief second, you can see that the username of one of the people who commented is "Rising_Pho3nis_23" and that just makes me realize how much foreshadowing these people included throughout the whole movie.

We see at some point that the first riot at the Institute was filmed when, at 57:59, in the recommended videos someone is watching, the top one is "Rhino runs riot at the Institute"

"I just want to be your friend. Is it ever gonna be enough?" Those are the only lyrics I was able to catch from the dance sequence, but those hit hard when you realize that Nimona is really just looking for a friend. And also that even with Nimona and Bal's efforts to prove that the Institute is bad, there efforts weren't enough (because the Director just turns the blame on them again)

When Nimona-Director is on the other side of the door with the pizza, their eyes do the reflection thing with the lighting.

During the scene where we see the civilians gathered in front of the Institute and yelling things like "Liar" and holding up sign that say "Villain" and "Liar" we see the statue of Gloreth standing in front of all of them bathed in red light, and it's almost like all of those things are being yelled at her.

"Zombies are immortal eternal beings. There's no way to kill them." "But what if they come for us?" *Attacks the zombies* Funny how fear drives them attack first, just like fear drove the villagers to attack Nimona first.

When the Director tries to warn everyone of Nimona, the "monster", she accidentally puts everyone against everyone, and, as we see in the pub, everyone starts to mistrust the people around them.

I have a theory as to why Nimona was painted as child in the scroll: It was to serve as a warning. It was to show that this "monster" could try to manipulate you into thinking it was harmless by becoming something that doesn't pose much of a threat: a child.

Nimona saying "I have not slept like that in forever." Who else thinks it's because they used to always have their guard up and was always a light sleeper in case they needed to flee quickly? Like, they didn't want to put themselves in a vulnerable position too long so they got used to getting maybe one or two hours of sleep every now and then.

I'll stop there for now. Might make more if y'all like this!

[madlad-sadgal]

Y'all know the drill at this point, and, as promised, this one's longer. Enjoy!

Nimona Spoilers!

If you go to the exact minute of 38:24, in the bottom right corner, you can see what I believe is, and correct me if I'm wrong, the polysexual flag.

The trans and rainbow pride flags in the background of the "sketchy part of town" scene.

It might just be me who hadn't noticed this, but the thing Bal uses to bandage Nimona's wound from the arrow is a piece of his cape that he ripped off and just, that's so freaking cute.

Nimona showing that she trusts Bal enough to tell him about her shapeshifting, contrary to the comic where, instead of just showing that it doesn't hurt/that she's used to the pain, she fakes that it hurts which, to me, shows that she still does not trusts Blackheart.

Nimona's "Look boss. You got betrayed by someone you trusted. It sucks. I get it." Hits a lot harder when you're re-watching the movie and you know about her backstory with Gloreth and how she was betrayed by her only friend.

Also, this is more related to the metro scene, but while they're talking after interrogating the squire, they pass by a sign that says "Verminator" with a dead rat face and a bunch of dead rats around it, so verminator is probably someone or something that kills vermin, such as rats/mice, and I felt like I saw that sign somewhere. Sure enough, if you look inside the metro when Nimona and Bal are entering it, you can see that same sign, and it's just funny when you think that at that moment, Nimona had shifted into a mouse.

Nimona and Am's "Arm-chopping is not a love language!" being funny little parallels.

Red, white and blue being colors we see a lot around them while Nimona and Ballister are arguing about if the government is something they should trust or not. Also, at the 43:50 mark, around the upper left corner, we see a red and white banner with two blue banners with white dots (stars?) on each side.

Also, at 43:38, when Bal turns to look at Gloreth's statue, we see the rainbow pride flag again with unicorns on each side at his upper right side, and that just made me giggle.

"You should be questioning everything right now. The will of Gloreth, the Institute, the wall. What's it all really for?" Nimona knows these things are built on lies and only exist to 'protect' everyone from her, but Bal doesn't and believes in these things because of the brainwashing. She is trying to subtly tell him "These things aren't to be trusted and you need to realize that." It is also something I address in this post. Also; "For protecting the realm." He's basically telling her, despite not knowing that's what he's kinda saying, that she is dangerous/a monster, and her answer of "Oh, you mean from villains like you? Or monsters, like me?" Hits SO MUCH HARDER when you realize that.

Am's eyes visibly stay stuck the sign of "A New Era of Heroes" with kid him and Bal when he and the Director fly in front of it.

Am's rant. It is relatable as fuck, the fact that you rant in your head but just say "I'm fine" to the people around you and keep everything bottled up (or maybe that's just me). Him being jealous of Bal's "new best friend". Him not asking for all the fame that comes from being a direct descendant of Gloreth and feeling pressured because of everyone's expectations. The "Arm-chopping is not a love langua-" is funny, but also sad when you realize the incredulous amount of guilt this poor man must have because of that moment that barely lasted a second. So that was my summarized rant about Am's internal rant.

Ambrosius feeling pressured by Gloreth's legacy and being her direct descendant (even though he doesn't voice it) and the Director literally saying "The blood of Gloreth runs through your veins." just seconds later pisses me off for some reason. Like, I know she can't just read his mind and know he feels pressured by that, but I also know she wouldn't care either way and would probably just tell him to "Stay strong" and I just-SKHFWJEFG

Nimona taking out a bunch of knights it no more than two seconds and in complete silence as well. Also, her mocking the director right after she says "Me!"

"Says the miscreant, whispering in his ear." The fuck are you doing then?

If Todd wasn't such an asshole, the movie would have ended so much fucking quicker. Like, I know I'm currently writing a story where he gets a redemption arc, but I still fucking hate him. Does that make sense? Giving a character you hate a redemption arc and making him nicer as well as giving him a love interest? I don't think it does, but oh well.

Also, if anyone would've taken a look at the "weapon" Todd shot, they would've seen it was a phone and would've maybe been like "Maybe he did have like a photo or video that proved his innocence? Just incase, we'll take both stories into consideration and question both sides, as we fucking should as the police/government."

This is pretty long I think, so I'm gonna stop there. Might make more if y'all like this.