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#and every single one of them has red hair and green eyes bc that’s how it ended up working out
wodania · 1 year
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Just set up my PS4 meaning that Elden Ring renaissance and Skyrim introduction may be fast approaching
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yeeterthek33per · 4 months
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Meet you maybe never (Pernille Harder x Magdalena Eriksson x Reader)
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A/n Sort of requested. This one's been in the to be done pile for a while, and I wasn't entirely sure about it, but I knew I wanted to write it. Hardersson need more love, and I will go to the grave saying this.
Content/Warning(s): Fluff, mild angst (really have to squint bc honestly), Artist R.
Part one in a new series of mine. Let me know how I went, guys.
Pernille's sigh of exhaustion holds a familiar weight in Magdalena's mind.
One that she shares greatly, considering she also shares the exact reason for it.
Moving is a pain in the ass.
However many boxes they'd carried up the stairs to their new shared Munich apartment remains to be seen, given that she didn't remember packing this many boxes.
The place has certainly been well maintained, and everything feels brand new too, so they were both very happy with the turnout.
In saying that, unpacking is going to be a nightmare.
Sure, it was a spacious place, and they have several other rooms to work with, but now with boxes in place, their concerns lie with furniture, only being left with a bare mattress and two camp chairs until they could get around to going furniture shopping.
Looking over from her position leant back against the wall, having set down the final box in the living room, she spots her girlfriend lying flat on her back on the cool floorboards, arm draped over her face dramatically.
An amused smile crosses her lips, and she chuckles, moving to sit cross-legged next to the blonde on the floor, hand patting her stomach.
"All good, Love?"
Pernille hums softly, although given the grimace on her face, it's more like a groan than anything.
"Perfect. Just perfect."
Magda holds back a laugh, letting her hand fall to rest on her girlfriend's arm, caressing the skin above where it had fallen to rest over her eyes.
"We'll get there, Love. It's not like you haven't done it before."
"And every single time, I'm reminded how painfully exhausting it is."
The defender simply chuckles, nodding her head as her hand migrates to the woman's hair, gently carding her fingers through the light blonde tresses.
Humming softly, she shifts to lay her head in the younger woman's lap, looking up at her with a small affectionate smile that's returned with a loving look in the swede's eyes.
"Hi."
She playfully taps the defender on the nose.
"Hi."
There's a soft giggle from the light blonde.
"Love you."
Magda's small smile turns into a bigger one as she moves her hand to cradle her face.
"Love you, too."
Maybe moving to Munich isn't all that bad.
--------------------------
"Magda, come look at this."
"One second love, this dining set would go pretty well with-"
She looks around her when she notices isn't beside her.
"Babe?"
She calls out.
"Come look."
She wanders over to where Pernille is pointing, a wall across the street visible through the furniture store's windows.
It's painted in varying stages of forest greens, baby blues, and over the top is a beautiful landscape of what they assume to be the German countryside.
A little cottage on a hill, in front of a rising morning sun, brilliant oranges, and reds contrasting the background greens and blues.
"That's gorgeous, we should go have a look later."
"Let's go look now."
"But we have to-"
Pernille's already out the door before Magda can stop her, leaving the swede to sigh softly and walk back out the door after her excited girlfriend.
The painting up close is intricate with little design details that you wouldn't find unless you looked up super close.
Little details, like the bricks on the little cottage, aren't actually solid bricks but aligned words like quiet, peace and home.
The sun is made up of faintly written words of bright, future, and Pernille tells Magda, the German word for Happiness.
It's feels so planned out and thought out, they spend a long time looking over each detail, feeling every line and ridge of paint on the wall.
A local actually stops to tell them about it when they ask.
It'd been there for a couple years, having no idea who'd painted it. It just appeared one day.
They decide they love the piece, snapping a photo of it to show to family and friends for later.
--------------------------
"Shit."
You barely feel the wall against your back in the cold.
Winter in Germany is not a fun time to be outside, and yet your stupid bored brain decided it needed to scratch an itch right now.
Waiting to be pick the perfect blank canvas, you had to duck behind a bricked off area while wearing your mask.
It covers most of your face bar a small gap for your eyes.
You hadn't exactly been subtle before and you'd already been photographed wearing it.
The last thing you needed right now was the press up your ass, or worse, the police.
Unfortunately, no matter where you are in the world, paparazzi are terrifyingly aggressive.
Quickly slipping away over another wall, you hop over a bin and find a blank, almost white wall, perfect height and size.
Assessing it for a second and checking for anu nearby vantage points that people could see you in and finding none in the low rise area.
You quickly drop your backpack, rifling through the old thing for your spray caps, and move to get to work.
It had come to you earlier and had been what had initially started the itch, said itch having been in the middle of a work meeting that you could not wait to get out of.
There would always be satisfaction in the way the lines matched up and swirled around others.
This time, though, it wasn't just a colourful background to look at.
You wanted to leave something on top of it, and you knew this one would take time.
Thankfully, you knew this area of buildings was mostly abandoned due to high levels of restructuring, so getting caught by locals wasn't an issue.
It was the occasional roaming tourist that gave you worry.
Pulling out a piece of charcoal, you use it to sketch out the baselines, not wanting to get ahead of yourself again, like you had last time when you spent far too long changing little mistakes made by using black paint first, leading to your biggest issue in the first place.
A public image to the mysterious artist of Munich.
Not something you need right now.
Sighing, you roll your head side to side, eyeing up the now line drawing in front of you
It looks pretty good.
It seems frustration helps you work better.
Unlike quite a few of the lackeys you know at work.
You roll your eyes at that.
Popping your achingly cold knuckles, you admire the lines for a moment longer.
This is one you want people to see, like many of your others, only more important.
It was a big thing for you, and you knew it would finally do something for the right people.
Now, just to fill it in and get the hell out of there.
--------------------------
Magdalena and Pernille get a welcoming party with the team.
The captain, Glódís, introduces herself to the pair.
They immediately find the woman incredibly welcoming from the get-go, a warm smile to pair with the kind words and introductions to the staff at the party.
"And finally, you've met him already, but, our beloved man in charge, Alex Straus."
Alex shakes both of their hands.
"Lovely seeing you ladies again, even if it's only been a couple of hours."
He pauses to chuckle softly and then gestures around him.
"I can only hope you're settling in well. The girls are eager to get started on the season with you both."
The nod from the Icelander confirms that with a small chuckle, herself, the lot of them pestering her about the team's newest signings, having to remain tight-lipped until they could meet them in person tonight.
She gestures over to the not-so-subtly excitedly waiting group of women in the room.
"Better go introduce yourselves. Otherwise, I fear they might have my head for hogging you both."
The couple giggle softly at that.
Pernille's the first to settle with the girls.
Having spent four years with Wolfsburg made it so she had to learn German if she wanted to keep up with the banter, so she's into the mix of things quite quickly.
Particularly with the international players who all find immediate common ground with someone who they've played against many times over the years, especially after the most recent World Cup.
Georgia tucks the Dane under her arm, officially claiming her already, and latches onto Magda not soon after, both of them attaching to the Englishwoman right away.
"Finally, after who knows how long of losing to these two at City, I get my transfer here and the find the next season, the ol' captain and striker who gave me so much strife playing against Chelsea, followed me here."
There's so good-natured ribbing, and Georgia pokes Magda in the ribs in particular.
"What, can't take a little Chelsea blue, Gee?"
Magda pushes back of course, competitive as she is.
"Pft, you and I both know Manchester Blue is the best blue."
The swede scoffs.
"You wish, Stanway."
"Nah, it's just facts, Eriksson."
The rest of the group giggles, knowing this fast friendship was going to be an entertaining one.
--------------------------
It seems it doesn't take long.
News of the artwork in Munich spreads like wildfire, catching the attention of your bosses almost immediately.
There was no way they would allow the media team to share this, considering the illegal nature of the piece, but they weren't displeased with it's sudden appearance, nor the traction it's gaining either.
It's a big thing for them.
It means more attention on the club, and it means more support from people because of how much they love the artwork.
That was an ego boost and a half.
Now, as you stare at the image on the projector board, you start doing what you always do and pick apart the piece.
Somethings not quite right with it, you think.
"Ms L/n, what do you think of this new development?"
Trying to appear as though you were paying attention, you look around at the other board members around you.
"I think it's the perfect opportunity for our latest news to gain attention. It certainly won't hurt that those players will gain attention, too."
Pausing to think for a moment before adding.
"Of course, there is always the risk of bad attention, especially from the press, but we can deal with that like we always do."
Another pause for a moment.
You glance over to the projector with the photo of the mural, rubbing your jawline softly, noting that something just felt off about the piece all of a sudden.
The eyes aren't right, there's not enough curve to the jaw.
You can't figure it out yet.
The itch returns for a moment before you continue, avoiding starting up too much on the itch.
"And with the good press, the club will gain more support from fans who will follow the players here, too. We should try and boost the promotion while we're at it. I'm aware the media team is doing the usual, but let's get in on the waves these two seem to be making while we're at it. Does anyone have any ideas?"
A woman further down the table pipes up.
"We can set up for some get to the know the players videos, have some meet and greets, send some of the veteran players with them over to a couple different plazas?"
A soft nod from you in agreement.
"Sounds good. We can let the media team handle the rest. Please. Stephen. Continue."
He nods before flipping to the next item on the agenda.
"Thank you, Director."
Nodding at the man, you turn back to your papers, scribbling small notations every so often, once again.
It seems the board aren't against it.
Good.
For now, you'd just have to encourage the publicity of the piece.
Not yourself.
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With training beginning within a couple of days of moving to Germany, it doesn't take long for whispers of the piece to make it to the gossip in the changing room.
Magda and Pernille don't realise what it's about until they ask what all the fuss is.
Some of the younger girls had been fawning over a photo taken from a distance, the piece lit up perfectly under the early setting winter sun.
Catching the sight of it over the shoulder of one of them, they ask about the name attached to it.
Scrawled in the caption, something catches Pernille's eye, having some knowledge of written German.
'Straßengänger'
Streetwalker.
"Who's that?"
She directs the question towards the younger Dutch girl on the team, Jill Baijings.
"Eh, a popular street artist, though they aren't really known aside from the name. Their stuff is really good, though."
She holds the phone closer to the women.
"Have you seen this yet?"
Pernille looks closer at the image, brows raising in surprise, with a soft muttered 'oh'.
The red, blue and baby blue, apparently FC Bayern themed background, made the highly realistic greyscale portraits pop nicely.
It was a promotional image for them.
As in Magdalena and Pernille.
Words scribbled under the image read,
"Welcome to Munich, Magda and Pernille!"
The image itself is beautiful.
It's an image of their faces in what is most likely both stages of goal celebration, screaming with victory, eyes crinkled and wide smiles, paired together over the gorgeous pattern, highlighting it perfectly.
It almost doesn't look real in the photo. But it's still very awe-inspiring to see.
Fans always have the most talent when it came to art like that, and it never ceases to amaze them.
Magda peers over her shoulder beside her, letting her appreciation for the art be known with a low whistle.
"Honestly, you guys will have to see it in person, though. it's so much better when you can get up close to it. All of their artworks always are."
"What did you say the name was, again?"
"Straßengänger."
"What does that mean?"
It comes from Magda.
"Streetwalker. We don't actually know where the name came from, whether it was the artist themself or the locals but either way."
They both nod, humming thoughtfully.
Maybe they would have to check it out.
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You know coming back is a bad idea, but you love the piece too much to not come back to it, knowing it would irk you to not get a better stance on anything that might need fixing, despite your best efforts to ignore the itch.
Of course, this time, without the mask on because that be even stupider.
Going back to the scene of the crime wearing exactly the attire that would incriminate you.
Standing back from a distance, you snap a photo under the settling sun in the cooling weather.
Something catches your attention off to the left, a pair walking down the sidewalk, well, more strolling slowly then anything.
Linked arm in arm and bundled far less than a lot of people would be for winter weather, they're wearing coats but braving the cold with thin material pants and shoes.
It's not that that catches your attention, though.
It's more your unabashedly gay side that notices them.
It seems you've caught the attention of your art's subjects.
Because here they are, noticing it finally, standing back admiring your work of them.
You quietly step away, but still close enough to hear the soft murmuring of them, being the only people on the street at this dying hour, you can hear them amongst the small breeze passing over the road.
They're definitely speaking Swedish because you can't make out what they're saying, only understanding the familiar lilt and tone of surprise in their words.
"Det är vackert."
"Varför oss?"
"Jag vet inte men det är fantastiskt."
You're about to walk away when Pernille walks closer to it, running her hand over the dried paint, her eyes moving over the piece slowly.
You notice she's tracing the underlying wording, realising she must have seen your art before to notice it that quickly.
As you keep a subtle eye on her, she's standing in the fading rays of sunlight, giving her a soft golden glow.
Her girlfriend moves to wrap her arms around her and it's then you see both of them a little differently to before you'd seen them in person.
They're absolutely beautiful, together and individually, and you realise you haven't captured that properly with your latest work.
It gives you another itch.
--------------------------
"You know, we have to meet this person."
Magdalena hums softly in agreement, hands running over Pernille's shoulders, staring up at the wall, eyes tracing the lines, the shading and the shape work, particular over the little footballs making up the swirls on the O in Welcome.
Her hand moves to her pupils in the portrait, paying attention to the way they're made up of shining stars.
The same with Magda's portrait.
There's a soft shuffle from behind them, and Magda's head swivels to look up at the source for a moment.
You're standing there, looking down at your phone, a soft smile on your face as you tap away at it.
She'd seen you standing there earlier already, taking photos, so she doesn't pay you much mind in the end, and you turn and walk away, putting the phone to your ear.
Although, there is mild niggle of curiosity, she brushes it off.
You're probably just another tourist looking at the piece.
"Come on, we have to head back soon or we'll start freezing out here."
"Few more minutes, Magda... Where's all those Swedish genes gone huh?"
Pernille teases the taller woman, poking her in the cheek.
Magda rolls her eyes good-naturedly.
"Yeah, yeah, real funny, babe."
Pernille chuckles, leaning back into the Swede.
She was right, though.
She had to find whoever did this.
The curiosity was getting to Magda, too.
Why them?
Of any of the influential people in Munich.
Or just any of the women's players.
Why them?
She has so many questions.
--------------------------
"And last but certainly not least, welcome to our newest signings, Magdalena and Pernille. Thank you for joining us and we hope you enjoy your stay here at FC Bayern."
The FC Bayern committee room erupts with a small applause from the players and board members before them who were all called in for a club wide meeting, even receiving a small whoop from Georgia in the back that makes the players around her either chuckle or roll their eyes at her.
"Now, handing off to our creative director."
"Danke, Herbert."
Stepping up onto the podium, the person immediately catches Magda's attention.
It's you.
The woman from the other day in town, at the wall.
There you are, climbing the steps up to the podium, black blazer jacket and blue jeans, half tucked with a white button up and a FC Bayern logo embroidered on the jacket pocket.
Pernille notices it, too.
"Now, I know this probably going to be the boring part but I'll try and keep it simple and just go over what our plan is for the next few months."
Looking out over the group, you keep your best public smile on.
"Don't worry, you don't have to remember any of this, as you'll be reminded as each one comes up so we don't miss anybody."
As you start to list off each of the latest marketing events and programs, your eyes shift over the players in their seats, despite the usually tired response at your while lilted, droning about the business side of things, you make eye contact with a very vigilant looking certain pair.
Your eyes crinkle mildly as you fight off too much of wide smile.
"There's a few meet and greets we want to go ahead with before the start of the season, including our newest signings, men and women, we'll send the details to those involved later."
You pause for a moment, eyeing up the latest of the new men and women in the crowd, placing back on the Scandi couple for a second before drifting and continuing.
"And, finally, we have an unfortunately mandatory promotional event on the third of October. It is also a black-tie event, so even me, who as many of you know already, shows up to everything wearing a sweatshirt and jeans, will have to dress up, please do the same. Thank you for listening everyone."
"Thank you, Director."
Taking a seat back with the crowd, it's almost like you can feel a pair of eyes on the back of your head.
You don't turn to face them, though, already knowing exactly who it is.
After the meeting is adjourned, you stand and ready to leave back to your office when a body stands in front of you.
A familiar tall Swede.
"Hey, I don't believe we've met properly."
"I'm Y/n L/n, creative director here at FC Bayern München."
"Magdalena Eriksson, although you already know that, it seems."
You smile, nodding and extending a hand out to her.
She shakes with a warm but firm grip, leaving the skin tingling a little.
She really is much more beautiful in person.
"It's lovely meeting you, Magdalena-"
"Call me Magda, feels a bit much for a full name, now."
"Lovely meeting you, Magda."
Letting go of her hand, you bid her as polite a goodbye as you can give, knowing any longer and you'd gay panic yourself into a problem, you make your way towards the door.
As you shift through the small crowd of players, nodding and smiling in acknowledgement to those who do know you or have met you, you exit the room swiftly, heart mildly racing.
You'd seen the look of recognition in her eyes, not from knowing who you are at Bayern, but perhaps somewhere else.
You aren't risking it.
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First and second training with the team went as smoothly as it could for any new team members.
However, their third is a little less cathartic.
Having to do extra medical assessments and fitness testing before being able to join the team, everything had been hurting that day.
They arrive home to their shared apartment almost completely worn down from the session.
At home, in their new apartment, finally furnished, for the most part, they both agree to get an early night's rest.
Annoyingly though, they can't seem to find it in them to sit still and toss and turn for the next hour or so, both of them in agreement they weren't sleeping right now.
They head out for another stroll through the quieter parts of the city, instead, taking a bus out there for the first ten minutes or so.
Hand in hand, they stroll down the quiet village-esque side of Munich, just breathing in the cool air, occasionally stopping to admire the rustic, olden style.
It's in the really silent part of town that they notice something.
The distinct sound of... a rattling can?
A spray can to be exact.
Pernille nods in the direction of a small alley, Magda initially shaking her head no, not sure if they should really confront someone who could be possibly dangerous or someone associated with the law.
Of course, the Dane sneaks over anyway to peek into the alley.
There, a figure stands with their back to them, hand wrapped around a baby blue can of spray paint.
The painting looks halfway done.
It's a portrait.
Of Pernille.
The woman's eyebrows just about fall off her face at the surprise and she turns back to her girlfriend who's waiting anxiously, looking about three seconds from dragging Pernille to the next taxi back to their apartment.
She gestures quietly to whisper to her over the cold wind howling through the gaps in the buildings.
"It's that artist."
"I figured, but we really shouldn't be associating with them. C'mon, we have to leave."
"Magda, c'mon, this is our chance to meet the person behind that mural."
A bit of back and forth before Pernille peeks her head around the corner to look, again.
This time, though, the person is bent down, rifling through their backpack, and a spray cap.
When Pernille turns back to a now very concerned Magda, she whispers in her ear.
"Just another minute. Just have a look at least."
The Swede very reluctantly agrees, looking for herself.
Concern is the first thing to pop into her mind.
This one is just of Pernille, accentuating the woman's eye colour and bright smile.
Is the artist, infatuated?
A million thoughts an hour as she watches the smooth, almost mesmerising way their hands trace lines and fill gaps.
When you pull out a paint marker to start with smaller details, she turns back to her girlfriend.
"Are they obsessed with us or something? This feels a little weird at this point."
Pernille frowns, almost shaking her head to disagree.
As the woman's about to answer, there's suddenly some shuffling, almost unnoticeable jingling of zippers and a body sat up on a short wall on the other side of the walkway, bag back on their shoulders once more.
"Actually, I'd say it's more an appreciation for a pair of legends in Munich."
They both startle heavily, Magda going into protective mode, arm around Pernille, pulling herself in front of the woman fully.
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The pair of them peeking on you were about as subtle as a whistle among bells.
Figuring you'd have to finish it later, you pack up swiftly, ensuring your mask sits on your face correctly before sneaking out of the alleyway to sit up on a wall above them.
After a not-so-much needed scare, you raise your hands in a surrender gesture.
"I won't hurt you. I just figured I should say hello personally since you're both here and all."
Magda looks nervous, and you can see the curiosity in Pernille's eyes from where you're casually seated.
"Although, I do suggest not sticking around. It's going to be a PR nightmare for the three of us if you're seen with the Straßengänger."
You punctuate the nickname with air quotes.
As you're about to jump up to climb onto the rook and make a swift disappearance of yourself, you hear one of them yell out to you.
Hesitating, you turn back to the pair.
"Why us?"
Pernille's brilliant grey-blue eyes look up at you, a radiance of dying curiosity in them as she holds her girlfriend's hand to calm the woman.
You stop for a moment before shrugging.
"A pair of beautiful women in the biggest sport and uprising for women. Why not you?"
It's there Magda gets a unrecognisable look on her face and you decide to leave it there.
With that, you scramble up onto the building, annoyed with yourself for having dragged ALL of your gear with you and also for leaving a half finished work behind.
A day or so later.
Luckily for you, no one else seems to stumble upon your work just yet, and with much scouting and caution, you find yourself back in that alley finishing what you started.
Making sure to adjust the shine in the subject's eyes to fit exactly how they shone up at you the day previously.
This time, the representation of the Danish captain seemed far closer to the spectacle she is in real life.
You're pleased with yourself for this one.
And it's scratched half the itch you'd had days prior.
Now for the other half.
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After their sudden meeting with the Straßengänger, Magda and Pernille are left with more questions than answers.
They both agree to just return home for the night, knowing it's a question for another day when they aren't in the middle of an already chaotic media storm.
After that, they get swept up in everything Bayern and put everything about the artist to the back of their minds.
Their first match is approaching fast and Alex already has Pernille in the starting lineup, so she gets distracted in preparation for that, finding herself busy studying the formation and technique of an entirely new team.
So much so, that she almost... almost forgets about the mural maker.
Although...
There's just one question that bugs Pernille constantly, despite her best efforts to focus fully on their new path in Germany.
Magdalena feels much the same.
"Who are you, really, Straßengänger?"
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the-doomed-witch · 1 year
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BOOP!
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Wanda Maximoff x Reader
Summary: The cuteness aggression gets insufferable once you get some time with your wife after a long day of work.
Word Count: 0.8k
Warnings: tooth-rotting fluff, bc wanda is just so cute also not proof read
Author’s Note: another one i wrote in like 30 minutes… welcome to skye-should-be-studying-but-they-keep-writing-short-fics episode two 🙏 (gif is mine)
MASTERLIST // NAVIGATION // READ ON AO3 // REQUESTS CLOSED
— ✦ —
Both of you sit on the couch, snuggling together after a long hard day at work. You nuzzle up against her neck, finally having felt her tangible presence around you after weeks. Work has been so tiring for you as well as Wanda, that both of you had begun to live together vicariously through memories. Hell, all of her features look so interestingly novel to you.
But when you look at her closely right now, after so long, she never fails to pass as the most adorable person you know. Her eyes still focus on the sitcom playing on the television. Oh Wanda’s mesmerising green eyes…
Her nose scrunches up as she smiles. The curve of her smile, the laugh lines. She’s the most lovable being to you.
You cannot control the feeling, you want to just keep on looking at her. So you immediately straddle her waist and grab her face in your palms. “Baby, what are you doing?” She speaks between little laughs. Oh my God. Stop being so cute.
You kiss her lips, hands finding their way around her neck. Wanda giggles between more kisses, her laughter is churning your insides. You adjust your seat around her waist, but she gets it wrong. “Y/N, detka, I’m sorry I don’t…”
“Oh no, no, I didn’t mean that. I know you’re tired, so am I.”
“Then?”
You stare into her eyes, viridescence engulfing them. A smile is given to her, which she reciprocates. “Goodness, Wanda. You’re the most adorable person ever.” She laughs gratefully at your compliment.
“Am I now honey? You think I’m adorable, hm?”
“I can’t comprehend how to describe it. I’ve felt your warmth around me after so… so long. I think I fall in love with you every single time I look at you. You’re just so-”
You boop her nose with yours. “What’s going on baby? What’s all of the sudden-” She gets interrupted by another boop.
You boop her nose with a finger again, and it makes you chuckle. Wanda looks at you with a blank red face, the blood rushes into her cheeks. She’s never been treated like this before, so tender, so light.
“I. Want. To. Bite. Your. Red. Cheeks.” you say, punctuating each word with further booping. Her face burns - she feels noticed under your gaze, as if she’d been invisible all her life.
“Y/N, I’m so confused…”
“I don’t know either Wands. I just want to bite your cheeks, squish them, boop your nose, give you so many kisses. I don’t know!” You pull her face close to yours and place little pecks on her freckles, “Can I call you pookie?”
Wanda throws her head back, laughing. “Oh dear, I love how you’re being so affectionate around me. I missed you. I missed us.”
You reply to her, “I missed you more, pookie.”
Her forehead rests over yours, as she cups your face between her warm hands. “I love it when you call me that.”
“Okay. Pookie.” You kiss her again, and again, and over again. Your teeth grit against each other in a tight smile, your visual focus on her. Her auburn hair is tied up in a lazy bun, and she’s free from her regular makeup. Just natural, sitting beneath you.
You pull strands of hair away from her face, a gaze filled with nothing but adoration. When you’re done playing with her hair, you hold her hands and kiss each of them softly. Throughout your little efforts, Wanda stares at you, occasionally giggling.
“I cannot eat you. That’s sad for me. But…” you smooch the tip of her nose, “I can kiss you all over. Lots of kisses, all of them for you.”
She wraps her hands around your waist, “Oh dorogaya… What’s going on today?”
“I love you so much.” you speak before planting more loud hearty smacks on her face. She’s adorably captivating. Wanda tries to hold you in place, saying, “Stop, Y/N! It tickles!” But it only ever encourages you.
“Darling, please…” Her hands entwine with your hair, pulling your face a little away. Reluctantly, you pull yourself back to see her precious smile.
“You’re my pumpkin pie, sweetheart, my dearest darling, absolute ray of sunshine, honeybun, sugar plum, my most beloved, littlest pookie!”
“Oh my, my, thank you for showering me with so much love. I love you very much.”
“You look like a strawberry with your red cheeks. I love you berry much!”
“Stop- I can’t help smiling!”
“I’ve been gifted with the best wife ever. Like, ever. My heart is just exclamation marks when you’re around.”
You kiss each of her cheeks and hug her tightly, snuggling in her arms. She kisses your forehead, wrapping the two of you in a heavy blanket. Patting your head, she says, “Good night, Y/N.”
Lightly, you kiss her shoulder and rest your head on her again. “Night, pookie.”
“You’re not letting that name go, are you?”
“Mhm.”
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duckymcdoorknob · 8 months
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@mystwrites I TOLD YOU ID MAKE THE FIC TEEHEE!!
INSPIRED BY THIS BEAUTIFUL FREAKING PIECE RIGHT HERE!!!
RARARA MULTIPLE TK SCENES BC YES
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Voices Carry
Warning! This is a tickle fic!
Ships: None! Char: Kurama and Hiei with a couple teaspoons of Lee!Yusuke
Warnings: This do have tickles below the cut ngl
Prompt: When the boys get into deep conversation one night, Kurama wants nothing more than for Hiei to shut up before he spills some secrets. Kurama would soon eat his words…
Tags: @giggly-squiggily TEEHEE SURPRISE! THIS IS MY “PAYBACK” FOR THAT LEE HIEI FIC >:))
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It was a rare occurrence when the four were together and they actually got to enjoy one another’s company. It seemed that whenever they were in the same room, there was something that was threatening their peace that would happen the next day.
Hiei was sitting on the bed, resting his chin on his arm as he watched the rain fall outside of Yusuke’s bedroom window. Kurama lay with his head in the fire demon’s lap, engrossed in a book. Yusuke was trying to mask his excitement—though failing miserably—as he showed Kuwabara his Lego creations, and the orange-haired boy was carefully holding every set to ensure he wouldn’t break it.
Rain was harshly falling outside, so the other three were not going anywhere for quite some time.
“And this is one that Keiko got for me last year. I still keep asking to pay her back for it, but her stubborn ass won’t let me give her a single yen,” Yusuke explained, holding up a large replica of the Death Star.
The pompadoured male’s eyes lit up as he took in the awesome wonder of the huge project. “How long did that one take, Urameshi?!”
“Oh man, let me try to remember…” the green-haired boy murmured, “a good few months at least.”
“So cool…” Kuwabara breathed.
“You wanna hold it?”
“Can I?!”
“Sure,” Yusuke chimed, carefully placing the orb into his friend’s hands. “Just know that if you drop it, you won’t be walking away unscathed. Got it?”
Kazuma paled. “M-Mhm!”
As the taller male observed the craft, Hiei sighed in contentment. He never thought that he would enjoy the company of the two ruffians; moreover, he didn’t expect to find solace in watching rain fall.
“Say, Hiei,” Yusuke’s curious voice sounded from the other end of the room. “Did’ya ever have a raindrop race? Like you watched two drops trickle down at the same time and raced them?”
The black-haired demon narrowed his eyes in confusion before turning to the curious boy. “That sounds unbearably boring.”
“It’s like watching paint dry,” Kurama quipped, his deft fingers coming up to turn the page.
“Hey!” The spirit detective whined. “Oh like you’re any better. You’re reading Dickens!”
The red-haired male’s eyes flickered away from the copy of Great Expectations to an angry Yusuke. “And how did you know who the author was? My finger was covering his name,” he replied curtly.
Yusuke’s face burned in embarrassment. “W-Well-“
Having safely placed the Death Star on the shelf above him, Kuwabara cooed at his friend. “Ooooo! Urameshi likes reaaaadinnngg!!” he chirped, accentuating his teasing words with repeated pokes to the boy’s sides.
Yusuke squirmed and sputtered as he curled in on himself, falling backwards against the spirit sword user’s torso. “C-Cut that ohohohout!”
Kuwabara trapped Yusuke in his arms, caging him in. The little pokes had turned into rapid vibrations, and soon Kuwabara’s fingers were wiggling into the boy’s sides. “K-Kuwahahahabahaharahaha!”
The orange-haired male flashed him a Cheshire grin, cooing little teases in his ear as he snaked his finger’s under Yusuke’s shirt to spider his fingers along his tummy. The two demons’ attention was grabbed by an adorable squeal of agony.
“Nahaha-nahahahahaohoho! Quhihihihit ihihihit! Stahahahappihihihit!” Yusuke whined as his hips arched off the floor.
“Kuwabara,” Kurama warned. “If he’s asking you to stop, you must be mindful of his requests.”
“Ihihihim okahahahay. Ihihihits juhuhust a- hahahabihihit-HYEAHAHA!” The green-haired boy all but screeched as he felt Kuwabara’s fingers trail down to prod at his hips. “WAITWAITWAIT! OKAHAHAHAY! OKAHAHAHAY! THAHAHATS- THAHAHATS ENOHOHOUGH! KUHUHUWAHAHABAHAHARAHAHA!”
The pompadoured male promptly stopped and smiled, patting Yusuke’s tummy a few times before helping him sit up. “Sorry, Urameshi, couldn’t help it.”
Yusuke panted a bit, his dopey smile still plastered on his face. “Yeah, yeah,” he breathed, “Better watch your back… sleep with an eye open.”
Hiei breathed out a chuckle, a small guffaw leaving him. “Now don’t let Genkai know about this weakness of yours,” he quipped, “You’d never make it through another training.”
The spirit gun user flushed upon thinking of said scenario. By the name of the Spirit World… Genkai would be merciless.
“This gets me thinking… do demons have weaknesses too?” Kuwabara asked, poking Yusuke once more and eliciting a jolt.
“Of course we do. You’ve seen Kurama and I get gravely injured multiple times.” The fire demon replied, a small bout of confusion evident on his features.
“No, no, he’s got a good point,” the green-haired boy interrupted. “He means like- do you have human weaknesses? Like can you see a puppy in danger and stop everything to save it? Do you feel sad at sad movies? Or do you get grossed out when you see a bug?” There was a small moment of hesitation from Yusuke. “Are you ticklish?”
“Well…” Kurama chimed, sitting upright on his ankles, “I do get feelings from my human form. I experience the full spectrum of emotion. I would save that puppy, and sometimes sad movies get me a bit emotional. I don’t very much mind insects, but I’m not a fan of them. I experience laughter and joy as well,” he answered, dodging that last question.
“Oh laughter he does experience indeed,” Hiei interrupted, looking to the boys with an evil smile, “It’s quite easy to incite that experience.”
“Watch your tongue, Hiei,” the redhead growled, “You’re letting too much information go.”
“Oh really? You think I’m revealing too much to our delinquents?” the black haired-demon asked with menace.
“I do. And I think you’re about to let something slip; something with which I would very much not like these hooligans to know.” He rocked forward on his knees, “walking” closer to the fire demon, their faces almost touching, “Lock. Your. Lips,” he demanded.
“Fine,” a Cheshire grin toyed at his lips. “After all, it’s like you’ve always said, Kurama…”
The two delinquents watched Hiei effortlessly push Kurama over, sitting on his waist and holding his wrists above his head with one hand.
“Actions speak louder than words…”
“M-Must we resort to s-s-such childish antics?” there was a new emotion in the fox demon’s voice that neither human had heard before: apprehension. Hiei wiggled his fingers above certain spots, never actually touching down. “These two d-dohohont need to sehehehee what you’re-mmh!- talking abohohohout.”
Kurama sounded like he was fighting off giggling, but his voice was still low and demanding. The usual bass was still present, but the sweet chuckles slipping out gave it a more charming sound.
Hiei remained silent, his fingers finally touching down to wiggle against Kurama’s underarms.
“Agh- Hihihihiehehei-plehehehehease - pffhehehehe- plehehehehease behehe cihihihivil.”
Absolute silence was the fire demon’s reply, causing Kurama’s face to flush a bit in embarassment, his laughter being the only sound in the room.
“S-Say an-ngh-ahahanythihihihing y-you heheheathehen!” the red-haired demon all but begged.
The two human boys watched with fervor, stars in their eyes glistened as they took in the beautiful reality in front of them.
Kurama is ticklish. Kurama is ticklish. Kurama is ticklish.
Kurama is ticklish!
With a bout of urgency, Kuwabara jumped to his feet, rescuing the copy of Great Expectations and dropped a bookmark in it. He sat back down next to Yusuke, holding the book securely.
“Hihihihieheheihihi!” the fox demon whined. “Plehehehehease!”
“Please what? You told me to be quiet, and I’m obeying your command,” the black-haired demon replied. “Don’t blame me; tickling you was too easy of an opportunity to pass up.”
The redhead turned his head to the side, hoping to hide his face. The pink tint on his cheeks was prevalent, further signifying his pure embarrassment. As Hiei moved his hand down to Kurama’s tummy and sides, the fox demon got a bit of a breather. He wasn’t the most ticklish there, but it still got some giggles out of him.
“Oh dear, what a pity that you aren’t ticklish here. It would’ve been quite amusing to see you curl up around my hand,” Hiei teased, letting his fingers rake up and down the other’s middle.
“Jesus…” the green-haired boy murmured in a high-octaved voice. “Being tickled by Hiei is a death sentence.” he felt dizzy even looking at it…
“I heard that, Yusuke,” Hiei reported. “Don’t think you’re off the hook.”
Poor Yusuke’s eyes widened. What did he do?!
The fire demon grew bored, opting to move his hand down and pinch at the fox demon’s hips. Kurama’s eyes bugged out as his breath hitched a bit. He fell into deep belly laughter as Hiei released his arms and dug in with both hands.
“H-Hihihiehehehei yohohOHOHOU bahHAHAHAstahahard!”
No reply once more. What a cruel, cruel man!
Kurama threw his head back against Yusuke’s pillow and squealed, beautiful laughter pouring from his lips. “HihihiehEHEHEhei!”
“What’s wrong?” An innocent inquiry. “Ticklish?” A menacing rhetorical.
“M-Mohohove- HYEAHAHAHA! MohohOHOhove spohOHOHots!”
“Hmph, your human form is such a weakling,” he murmured, causing Kurama’s blush to deepen, “as you wish.”
The fire demon’s hand found their way to the fox demon’s thighs, taking refuge and squeezing there. Kurama shot upwards and tried to push at the hands assaulting his hyper-ticklish thighs. The poor redhead could only fall backwards and squirm, hoping to escape.
“NONONONO! NOHOHOHO! NOHOHOHOT THEHEHEHERE!”
“Oh? Not… here? But I could have sworn that you had said to move spots. It’s not nice to make requests you don’t want fulfilled.”
“Man, Hiei is ruthless,” Kuwabara reported over Kurama’s frantic giggling, placing the book safely on the floor next to him.
“Hmph. Serves Kurama right for always tickling me,” Yusuke pouted through pursed lips.
“YUHUHUHUSUHUHUKEHEHE! KUHUHUWABAHAHAHRAHAHA! HEHEHEHELP MEHEHE!” Kurama all but begged.
The two boys smiled as they stood to their feet and spectated from a higher angle. This side of Kurama was one that only they would be lucky enough to see. His sweater had ridden up a bit, revealing the soft skin of his torso, flushed pink from the previous contact of ticklish fingers. His face was pinker than his shirt, and little tears of mirth dotted the corners of his eyes.
“Aw man, Kurama, you look adorable!” Yusuke chirped. “Of course I’ll help you out.” the spirit gun user chimed as he softly swiped his fingers across the fox demon’s neck.
Well, that did it.
Kurama exploded into cute laughter. Not knowing which person to arch away from, he simply let his head hit the pillow as he boomed with laughter. His chuckles were breathy and desperate, with little hiccups and stutters adorning them.
“YOHOHOHOU TWOHOHOHO AHAHAHRE AWFUHUHUHUL! IHIHIHI- *Hic* IHIHIHI CAHAHAHANT-“
“Guys-“ Kuwabara attempted.
“Awww, poor Kurama,” Yusuke teased in a baby voice, eyes closed in glee.
“Hey, guys!-“
“QUIHIHIHIHIT IHIHIHIT! *snort* IHIHIHITS TOHOHOHOO MUHUHUHUCH!”
“Perhaps you should have thought about that before you spoke to me with such poison on your tongue,” Hiei replied, focusing on squeezing with dexterity.
“CMOHOHOHOHON!! ST-STOHOHOHOP ALREHEHEHEADY!”
“HIEI! URAMESHI!”
The two males stopped their assault immediately, looking at an angry orange-haired boy. Their attention had been dwindled from Kurama for a few seconds..
“You have to give him a break. He’s tired! Can’t you tell he’s had enough?”
When the three looked back upon Kurama, the two humans felt a chill run down their spines. In place of his previously fiery-red hair, long, white strands adorned his head. Large, fuzzy ears twitched before he sat upward, pushing his two assailants off of him.
Before he could register it, Yoko pounced, and their positions were switched. Yusuke was now pinned under the demon effortlessly, squirming in anticipation.
“Now, now, Yusuke,” his smooth voice had murmured. “It seems you know what’s in store for you…”
The boy swallowed. Kuwabara backed up, grabbing a starstruck Hiei and pulling him off of the bed.
“Now, tell me,” Yoko demanded. “What is the difference between myself and my pathetically sensitive human form?”
The spirit gun user squirmed a bit in anticipation. “Y-You have claws?”
A rumbling laugh escaped the white-haired demon. “Astute observation, Yusuke, but that was not the answer I was seeking.”
Yusuke’s body squirmed and squirmed, trying to free himself as Yoko’s hand descended and rested atop of his tummy.
“Shuichi experiences human emotions, and I do not,” Yoko whispered calmly. “And among those emotions…”
Yusuke all but screamed when he felt the demon’s claws begin their ticklish assault on his sides. It was 100x worse than Shuichi’s more gentle approach. His bottom instantly arched up from the bed as helpless laughter poured from his lips.
“Is mercy…”
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—————♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎—————
30 notes · View notes
waitingonher · 3 months
Note
pjo please!
male!
okay so i’m a very extroverted person, i’m an entp, aquarius and a daughter of hermes! i feel like i talk a lot but alas i’m just a yapper. i’m a very goofy person and i tend to be really clumsy too. i smile a lot, and i make jokes all the time. i have a darker sense of humor but i tend to be a little bit emotional. i have adhd and anxiety and i’m pretty smart, i’m either really tired or really hyper there’s really no in between. i like to randomly dance or randomly sing. my favorite season is autumn and i love road trips and movies. i wanna work on screenplays/direct movies when i’m older! i have medium length faded red hair, blue/green eyes and freckles on my whole face but i have a lot more under my right eye. i’m 5’3” and have an upside down smile (legitimately) and ummmm yeah! 😁
physical touch is my number one love language and then quality time, and words of affirmation are my second and third!
i love skateboarding, listening to music (i listen to like everything except stuff i don’t like 😭😭) i also love flowers and taking walks/nature, i hate the cold tho bc i feel like i’m cold all the time, i love road trips like i said earlier but my favorite hobby/intrest is film. film is my life! i watch so many movies and would love to write one someday, but for now i’m only doing reverse screenplays for practice hehe.
ironically not the cinema because i feel like you can’t talk and get to know each other. i think a walk in the park with coffee or ice cream would be my ideal first date. you can get to know each other and there’s really no effort or money needed!
my TYPE is blondies with blue eyes but i doesn’t really matter to me, they have to be taller than me tho. they have to be funny, and sweet, and takes initiative to do cute things and like be there for me and call me cute names and stuff yk like act like a bf.
thank you!!!! <3
your matchup is . . . jason grace!!
if you and jason had a trope it would definitely be sunshine x grumpy, except jason’s not even grumpy, he’s just on the quieter side lol!
he’s always there to listen to your rants about anything and everything, his focus as sharp as if he were on the battlefield. it could be the stupidest conversation ever, but jason’s still nodding along, as if the soggy pancakes at breakfast were the most important thing in the world. 
jason’s favorite parts about you are your smile and your freckles! 
there’s nothing he wouldn’t do to see that favorite smile of his. the way your eyes light up so beautifully makes him think that you’re somehow related to the sun. because of this, jason subconsciously compares you two to the sun and the moon. whenever he spots little trinkets of the two, he buys it no matter the price or the line in which he has to wait in. couples with matching sun and moon keychains stay together! 
sometimes at night when you two are cuddled up, jason decides he absolutely must kiss every single freckle on your face. his warm hands hold the sides of your face as he peppers millions of kisses across your face. sure, it tickles, but who are you to say no to your boyfriend’s kisses? especially when he tells you that he’ll stop loving you when he’s done counting and kissing all of your freckles (jason’s lost count). 
jason who supports your hobbies with every fiber of his being! if you’re one to be open about your ideas/the screenplays you write, then just know that he’s listening to and reading every single one of them. he loves how creative you are, and him being able to see what your mind can create is one of the many blessings you’ve given him. 
if you were to ask for any feedback (he rarely finds that you even need critique), jason’s very honest about it and he words it in a respectful way. 
random dancing and singing breaks with jason!! 
he might not be the best at either, but he’ll do it because you’re having fun. 
beach dates!!!! 
especially when it’s summer and the sun’s at its hottest, what’s better than taking a trip down to the beach with his favorite person? this may or may not be your favorite summer activity because when jason asks you to put sunscreen on his back, and you can feel his toned muscles as you rub in the product…wow (he also may or not be flexing them purposefully) 
jason who’s never surprised when his closet is completely CLEARED of any and all of his jackets, hoodies, sweaters, etc. 
he never minds though because he loves loves lovesss seeing you in his clothes! 
anyways…yeah you two are endgame!
your second contender was . . . percy jackson!
. . .
author's note: yaaaay first matchup woop woop! i hope you like it <3 thank you for your support!!
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skazoo · 2 years
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wrath of the bride.
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↳ hwang hyunjin x reader, minor lee felix x reader
anger is better than tears, better than grief, better than the void that's in your heart. revenge is better.
length. 2k
genre. frankenstein!au??, ANGST. NOT A SINGLE FLUFF BONE IN THIS BAD BOY.
warnings/tags. stockholm syndrome, mental instability, manipulation, mention of death and graphic description of murder, blood, violence, mention of sex, language.
networks. @kflixnet
notes. so... yeah... this is inspired by skz mama performance and kinda by overwatch 2's halloween event don't judge me thank you and i hope you like it <3 (i had this song on repeat while writing)
ALSO please PLEASE read the warnings!!! you should not be following my account if you're a minor exactly bc i work with themes like this SO PLEASE MINORS DNI!
i'm desperate for feedback and i love comments with your opinion!
(cross-posted on ao3 only)
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felix was losing his mind.
no, felix had lost his mind a long time ago.
all these past months he’s felt everything. the doctor’s clinical touch on his feverish skin. examining him, studying him, changing him.
he’s smelled everything. antiseptic, a little bitter, with undertones of the artificial fragrance of the cold liquid he’s been trapped in, and the occasional weak trail of the lover’s perfume. your perfume.
he’s seen everything. the doctor’s silver hair reflecting the blue neon of the laboratory, vials, and syringes, some filled with his blood, others with a bright green liquid, your eyes smiling through the protective goggles in your white lab coat and without shoes on, the doctor’s love for you, his betrothed.
and felix has heard everything, but his favorite sounds are the doctor’s voice when he assured him ‘it’s not gonna hurt’, the giggles you let out that time the doctor got down on one knee and swore unconditional love to his one and only, the sounds of your love echoing in the silent lab that same night.
everything reaches his borderline comatose being, and thanks to his captors he feels alive. loved, valued, taken care of. 
nowadays his mind doesn’t even wander off to them anymore. they couldn’t keep him safe so they can’t make him question things about the doctor or the lover. they are the big bad wolves in sheep’s clothing and they made promises that in the end, they couldn't keep. felix knows the doctor wouldn’t lie to him so everything is fine. he’s safe.
every now and then he remembers how it was before. the entitled beliefs of his friends. the battles they weren’t supposed to fight against enemies they had made up to clear their own conscience, to create the scapegoat. how sad, how uninteresting.
his dazy train of thought is derailed by the doctor's entrance into his kingdom. the queen is not with him, felix notices and wants to ask why but all that escapes his lips is a small bubble of air making its way up the tall container he’s floating in.
the doctor ruffles his silver hair as he puts on his pristine lab coat over a smooth black tuxedo and throws felix a small wave. “hey, just came to run some tests before i go. nothing serious.”
if he could felix would ask ‘where?’ but the doctor seems to be able to read his mind and with a simple shrug he turns to him with an excited grin on his lips. “don’t know if you remember but today is the day.” the man wiggles his hand in front of the glass of the container. “i get to marry her!” a simple silver ring catches the blue neon lights. 
for a second felix is ecstatic. truly. then all darkens and the machines monitoring his vitals start beeping aggressively. “i take that you’re happy for us then.” a small chuckle leaves the doctor's mouth.
but felix just wants to scream, to break the glass and run to him. to warn him, to warn the bride.
everything happens by grotesque coincidence.
the unsuspecting doctor is too focused on the thought of his lover to notice the thin red laser pointing at his temple from the small glass window of the backdoor of the lab.
said lover slowly makes her teasing entrance from the double doors of the underground space where her soon-to-be husband is working.
and everything that was not supposed to happen finds its twisted way into the real world.
the tap of a high heel on the floor. silence. the whistling of a bullet. death. a crash.
the doctor falls lifeless on the ground right as felix’s container gets smashed into million pieces by the same bullet. as the liquid that enveloped his body flows out on the ground taking him with it, felix thinks that he doesn’t like this, gods don’t bend. gods don’t die.
the group of usurpers that he recognizes rush toward him. they whisper sweet reassurances but felix is too concentrated on the fear that has taken him. the anguish, the grief. he’s too concentrated on you.
darkness. when everything you know and love is taken away from you, so harshly, all you think about is anger, hatred, and even revenge. and no one can save you.
the visceral scream you let out is raw, bone-chilling, and is enough to make everyone in the lab freeze. 
everyone’s attention is on you. some of them are scared, some are ready to kill you too, he’s reaching for you in worry while the others keep him away by his arms. 
but the only thing you can see is the only person you’ve ever loved sprawled on the white floor of the lab —of your home— his white coat is stained with the dark blood slowly flowing out of the bullet wound in his head. white lilies peek out of his chest pocket.
“what did you do!? don’t fucking touch me! you killed him!” felix is sobbing with heartbreak and they don’t understand. can’t understand. “y-you killed him! you’re hurting her!”
the buff man on his left tries to calm him down. “lix, you’re safe now, please calm down-”
“she’s hurting and it’s your fault! you killed the doctor and the lover is sad! you will regret this! i will make you regret this!” at this point he’s snarling, foam at the mouth and tears in his eyes.
“what did they do to you?” the man whispers under his breath then turns to another. “chan, what- what do i do? this is not felix, i don’t-”
“make him pass out, we’ll deal with it when we escape this madness.” his order gets drowned by your screams and wails that are still resonating in the closed space of the lab.
“they saved me!” are the last words your creature yells out before the grip of a gun on his temple makes him black out.
the murderers flee your once pristine realm and you’re left alone with him.
your heart has broken into a million pieces and doesn’t beat anymore. it’s dead, still, silent, harboring plans of hungry revenge.
you're a scientist, you know how it all works. first, there’s clinical death. cessation of blood circulation and breathing, the heart stops its regular rhythm, cardiac arrest.
then in four to six minutes, the light of your life will be unsalvageable —biological death— by normal science’s standards. 
you crawl over hyunjin’s body, the white lace dress dips into the pool of blood and absorbs it like a sponge. hyunjin asked you to wear it. he wanted a real wedding with the dress, the cake, the first dance, the honeymoon, married sex. he wanted to give everything he knew you couldn’t even know you wanted. he wanted to make you his bride because he wanted you to know that you deserved to be loved like that even if others thought otherwise.  
it’s still warm, his body. 
you take his head in your hands and hold him close to your body, hoping you can share some of your breath with him, hoping to have him back just by loving him.
but of course, it doesn’t work and so you do what you must, what your husband would have done if he were in your place. what the doctor would have done.
death, grieving, mourning, they’re all commonplace. science is not. logic is rare, and so you dwell on it.
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when felix closes his eyes he enters the void. 
he’s floating and he understands who he really is. he knows what’s happened in the past and what’s happening in the present. sometimes he feels like he can see the future as well but maybe that’s just because he’s already decided what to do when he wakes up again. in this state of tranquility and silence he can rationalize all the time he’s spent under the doctor and lover’s careful gaze. or at least he thinks he can.
when he was taken all that time ago he had been scared. 
he doesn’t think he feared you as real people, but as otherworldly beings, superior to everyone and slaves of none, above the concepts of time and space. of life and death. he thought he would be gone by the time you started experimenting on him like he knew you would have, but you were not monsters and you let him keep his mind in your act of immense magnanimity.
you were angels and felix was lucky to have been saved by you.
some part of him felt like a kid playing hide and seek, afraid of being found. his seekers were just that close and he wanted to, he had to scream out and let them know where he was. the fear and tension were so overwhelming that anything was better than the suspense of hiding.  
his life had been disrupted, it had even been threatened to be lost. but he’d joined the threat and he was no longer at risk. he’d become the monster and the monster was no longer scary. the tension had broken. the brain had accepted it as an epiphany, a victory. aha! this is truth! this is purpose!
he knows that most people live pretty mediocre lives. pathetic. him included. fighting a war against the ambitions of others —the doctor’s ambitions— with his naive group of friends. normal people study. they work to pay bills, to survive in this wretched world, and suddenly they’re caught up with people who do things for reasons. the doctor and the lover. they have drive. they have purpose. the smallest act has meaning. these people are doing real things which they believe are worth living for and dying for, and they scare everyone else. 
seven months ago he was afraid of losing his busy and pointless life, now he knows what someone who will gladly die for a cause looks like and he loves it. he admires and wants to protect your angelic minds. he will protect you.
like a lever being pulled, felix's resolve strengthens and his eyes snap open, an imperceptible green glow clouds his iris.
the others have formed a messy semicircle around him as if to keep him away from anything coming from the hole in the rundown shack they’ve chosen to rest in. as if to stop the lover to look for him if she ever decides to. they can’t. no one can if she chooses to take them to their personal hell, felix knows it and smiles.
everyone is sleeping, some more soundly than others. changbin’s hand is preventively resting on the handle of the gun in his pants and every now and then chan tightens his fingers on the knife under the makeshift pillow he’s lying on.
felix walks around his captors like a knight would walk around the enemy lines and in this delicate situation, he really feels like one. a knight in shining armor who faces dangers and monsters only to return to his queen because he owes his life to the crown.
with this in mind the first throat he slits with the piece of glass found in the shack is emancipating. jisung’s eyes widen and he can see the life drain from his body.
the second and the third are silent. seungmin and jeongin die clawing at felix’s hands, foam at their mouths, fear in their faces.
minho manages to live a few seconds longer because felix doesn’t make a clean cut. his blood gurgles in his throat and paints felix’s hands red.
changbin dies loudly just as he’s lived. the gunshot of his own gun echoes through the room and wakes the last of them.
chan looks around in grief. he wants to kill him, felix knows and opens his arms to invite him in.
poor chan, no one told him to not bring a knife to a gunfight.
he thumps to the ground, a bullet hole that matches the doctor’s.
felix smiles and turns to the door. a pale moon shines on his green eyes as he makes his way to you. after all, he’s sure you’ll need help bringing your doctor back from the dead.
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is-lu-for-everyone · 1 year
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More of my TMNT 2012 AU! bc i have thoughts✨️
How do they end up in the Future?
We start in season 2, after X Dimension but before The Invasion, so things are Tense
The usual check up of a very suspicious kraang base going from spying to fighting real quick. Why? There was a cockroach right there, man, and it flew!
Mikey was very smug of the fact that this time it wasn't his fault. Raph was Not Amused.
there was a large portal of pink light on the other side of the garage, which they believed was another portal to the X dimension
Mikey kept a healthy and respectful distance from the thing. maybe he was the king of dimension x, but he had no intention of going back there, thank you very much!
His brothers didn't kept such distance
The fight, as always, went south and the portal broke down, not without sucking Leo, Raph and Donnie in
Mikey just stood there, in a building that was burning down and surrounded by broken robots, without brothers in sight
Meanwhile, the bros end up in a dirty hole in the middle of a wasteland, with heavy air and a green mist everywhere, without their Orange brother, with only one sword and one sai
They are, righfully, in full panic
The city looks like it had been bombed, with kraangs coming and going in big machines
They go to Home in search of their family, but the place is just as destroyed as everything else , and there they just find the old tree as the only living thing
Just when they decide to go and check in april's house, they come across a little girl with a Red bow and a very harsh temper
They decide to take the little girl with her family before looking for their own
And when the little girl starts talking about that amazing Sensei of hers, maybe is their Splinter?
They do NOT expect to find a very Stressed Out Mutant (a gecko, it seems) in their way to the little girl's home
'Daddy says he sucks ass at fighting'
'Im telling your mom you said that'
They witness the mighty rivalry between a grown ass Mutant Gecko and a little girl
Curiously, the mutant, Mondo, doesn't look at them in the eyes while he guides them to 'The Lair'
Facts About Future Gang!
After the boys went missing, they tried to look for them but the invasion came with all it's fury
Just like in canon, they lose the Lair as well as Splinter, but in this timeline they didn't leave New York
Casey has a prosthetic leg made with trash and a little of kraang technology, made by dr. Rockwell, Leatherhead and Mikey. There were a lot of explosions and Casey loved every single one
April had an Incident with the Kraang that ended with her having the Really Cool Tentacles coming out of her head. Now she uses an undercut to let them go as they please without her hair getting in the way.
Casey and April are not a couple, just best friends that hooked up that one time due to grief and suddenly they had a baby coming
They don't like to acknowledge it, but the three of them know that having little Jones in their lives saved them from going in very dark paths
Mikey was this close to go Last Ronin Mode
At some point, Mikey teaches April how to use Donnie's Bo and teaches Casey' how to use Raph's sai
Karai made April a full kunoichi
Karai has her new clan of ninjas that fuck things up and help survivors taking them to Mikey's Base
Mikey's code name for the survivors is Holy Chalupa bc Karai thought it was funny as shit
Casey is the leader of a group of explorers and always brings gifts to the fam
Casey and Mikey meet Mondo Gecko while running for their lives (Mondo smashed his skate in Casey's head) one year after The Invasion
April, Casey and Mikey co-parent Little Jones (it takes an army to raise a Jones)
One time they tried to make a retro-mutagen, but it was a bad batch and things went south
Casey's dna mutated Mikey a little, boy ended up in bed with a fever for a week and woke up with black hair and a body a little more human everyone disliked that) His bones are NOT happy
Casey too stayed in bed for a week, and dude ended up with stronger bones (everyone is grateful for that) and some patches of green scales here and there. He is trying to convince Leatherhead and Rockwell to make him a battle shell
Turtle pile hours with Mikey and Casey ft Little Jones
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b3ast0fburd3n · 14 days
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Muse List for B3AST0FBURD3N
This is the last time I'm gonna switch between multi/single I swEAR
All in fc3, 2012 for ease of timeline management. those without full bios will have them soon.
PRIMARY:
Eden Seed (21) - Daughter of The Father himself, Eden holds her values and beliefs close to her chest. She is strong and independent, slow to friendship but fiercely loyal and always willing to do what it takes to get the job done. PROUD, ENVIOUS and WRATHFUL. She values softness and kindness in others while never allowing herself the same grace. Eden does not command respect, she’s too awkward, but at least now the pirates have stopped calling her Angel. 
She can often be found working around the North island, handling shipments, hunting, or, if others are doing the same, relaxing by the water.
Notable physical traits: Eden has heterochromia (ITS PLOT OKAY) blue/brown, short blonde hair buzzed except in the front and back (think mohawk without the middle. mowk), covered in religious scars and tattoos, 5'9. FC is Kristen Stewart.
quick bio, characterhub (full bio, outdated tbh)
She also has fc4/ 5/ ND details, to be discussed later when I actually write them down
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THE REST:
Atticus Hayes (34) - Will not answer to Atticus, you’re better off with just Hayes. Overgrown manchild, just as awkward as his friend and roommate, Eden, without the foresight to stop talking. Lazy hedonist, complainer, annoyance. Just as sexist and grotesque as the rest of the pirates. Despite being in the military, his personality led to him not being invited to the privateers. Hayes tries to avoid work as much as possible, he's often lounging at a bar or hanging around other pirates, annoying them with his constant rambling.
Notable physical traits: Absolutely covered in scars. 2012 pre-Brody sees most of them on his body, including the lack of both little fingers, left middle and right ring fingers. 2012 Post-Brody includes fresh slices across his face (skin no longer dangling, thank you medic) from his former best friend. Buzzed brown hair, brown eyes, 6'4. and bc I don't know where to put it: From Australia.
this is the oldest drawing on my current laptop (like three or four years old) but it is unfortunately the most accurate (excluding the gages). fc is Brad Pitt from Fight Club!
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Charlie Barlow (16) - Tech extraordinaire. He graduated high school early, so his mom took him on a cruise! How sweet! Until they run low on gas and float too close to Rook. After watching his mother be slaughtered by pirates, Charlie lost a piece of himself and gained a new life goal. Survive. He'll do anything to get on someone's good side, throw anyone under the bus. Entirely loyal to himself. Only being on the island for a year, most people don't know Charlie, and after an unfortunate meeting with Vaas left him chair bound, most don't see him. He stays in his shack, with limited internet connection doing whatever Eden (or anyone who threatens him) asks.
Notable physical traits: 5'6, grown out buzz, red hair with hints of black box dye on the tips, E carved into his cheek, brown eyes, squints because he lost his glasses.
fc is Nathan Westling
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Elias Dubois (26) - Quiet, pensive, clean freak. Genuinely has OCD and also happens to prefer things neat. VERY clean, bathes at least once every two days, has two cabinets full of bleach and soap. No one is fully in control on Rook, not even Hoyt. Elias strives to control everything he can, including his own space and the makeshift cafe where he prepares food. Not particularly friendly with anyone aside from customer service politeness, he prefers to keep to himself by not sharing many personal details. This is just a defense, though, Elias is deeply void of human connection and severely touch starved. Stays in his cafe most of the time, has a small bedroom in the back, only really leaves to collect shipments of food/supplies sent to him.
Notable physical traits: 6'1, Green eyes, light brown hair usually pulled back but always up when he's cooking. Mustache and scruff on his chin. A couple scattered tattoos.
fc is Kyle Gallner
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Mahsuri Hasan (29) - Mahsuri comes from a long line of Seers, her chosen divination tool is cards. All are welcome to her tent, as long as they obey the policy: Leave your weapons at the door. Suri is a friendly and generous person, no one leaves her without a small trinket or rock to guide them along their way. Even when dealing with the pirates, she keeps her opinions to herself and tries to offer them some respite from their tumultuous lives. She grew up with the Rakyat, but finds more value in playing both sides than living for only one, despite her diehard allegiance to Citra. Can always be found in her tent, if not then she's being friendly with the residents of Badtown.
Notable physical traits: Brown dreadlocked hair, brown eyes, scars on her wrists from a run in with pirates. Carries a shoulder bag with her main deck in it.
fc is Danai Gurira
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kumeko · 3 months
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For risquetendencies, for the FE Three houses Spring exchange!
Prompt: For, Dorothea marrying someone else (maybe Hanneman bc the fact that they have a paired ending with kids blew my mind) because it was the best option at the time. She and Linhardt were mutually pining while at the academy but he lazed around too much then instead of shooting his shot and missed the chance to say anything. Years later, they cross paths again and old feelings are rekindled.
A/N: I absolutely love the idea of a reunion like this! Immediately it ate my brain and I had to write it. I was tempted to have her married to Manuela/Ferdinand, I think that would be a fun ot3, but I wanted this to be a more tempered piece and Hanneman fits a lot better than “whirlwind romance of 3 divas”. I also find Hanneman’s ending with her funny, I wonder how many years it took before she said “Yep, those are my kids and my husband.”
Dorothea.
A woman Linhardt hadn’t thought about in over a decade. A woman he hadn’t seen in even longer. Yet, despite the time that had passed, he knew the woman standing in front of him was her all the same. Her face had matured over the years, soft cheeks giving way to more defined cheekbones. Where before her hair had been loose and free, her wavy locks were pinned up, giving her an elegant look. And her clothing…
True to her wishes, she had clearly moved up in the world, swathed in silks and satin as she was.
Her green eyes widened as she caught sight of him. Despite her surprise, she recovered faster than he did, her ruby red lips curving into a provocative smile. “Linhardt. It’s been a while.”
Even now, her voice had a musical lilt. Tongue-tied, all Linhardt could reply with was, “Yes, it has.”
-x-
The Crimson Flower was a small but fancy coffee shop. Despite his passing knowledge, he could tell with a single glance that the red velvet seats and the intricately carved wooden paneling were of the highest quality. The last time he had entered such a refined establishment, he had still numbered amongst Fódlan’s nobility.
Now, as a mere researcher, it cost more than a year’s salary for a single meal here.
A problem Dorothea didn’t have, with the familiarity she perused the menu. A red fingernail traced the fine stock paper listing a variety of deserts. Her lips pursed as she tapped one before sighing and setting down the menu. At his curious glance, she smiled wryly and explained, “Tragically, now that I have a show in production, I have to maintain my figure.”
 Even in his relative hermitage, Linhardt had heard passing tales of her performances. “Your fans wouldn’t mind.”
“That’s sweet.” Dorothea bit her cheek before signalling a waiter and ordering the smallest slice of cheesecake. “I suppose it can’t hurt to have just one. It is a special occasion.”
Special. Throughout their school days or the war, they hadn’t been the most intimate. Just two acquaintances who’d bump into each other every now and then in the quiet corners of their school. His most vivid memory was of her sitting beside him in an alcove, her crossed ankles grazing his, her chin propped on her hand as she idly looked out the window.
Of her green eyes filled with silent mirth whenever she noticed his stare, her lips mouthing, “Like what you see?”
And now here she was, sitting across from him, more than a table between them.
“You look good,” Linhardt finally said after their coffees arrived. He hadn’t been keen on the drink until Hubert had all but foisted it on him. Now he could hardly handle a day without one.
Dorothea chuckled. “You? Giving Pleasantries? Since when did you care for social norms?”
His fingers curled around his hot mug. “I’ve had to adapt. It’s hard to get research grants otherwise.”
“Hmm, so I’ve heard.” Dorothea stirred her coffee twice. “I suppose time really does change everything. Even you.” She tapped her spoon on the rim as she studied him. “I wish I could say the same, but you look terrible. Have you been sleeping?”
He resisted the urge to turn to the window. Without looking, he knew what he’d see: dark bags under his eyes, pale skin, messy strands of hair escaping his ribbon. It had been a while since he’d last groomed. Suddenly, he wished he had. “Exhausted,” he explained. “The problem with research, I suppose.”
Dorothea frowned. “Ah, yes. Research. My bane.”
Linhardt paused. She’d never seemed to hate her studies in the past.
“What are you researching?” Dorothea asked before taking a sip of her coffee.
“Crests.” Was there an easy way to tell her? He usually talked to fellow academics; it had been a while since he had to translate to the layman. “To be precise, the variations of Crest strengths, especially on those that have diverged from other Crests over the centuries.” Cutting himself off before he could ramble, Linhardt looked away. “It’s hard to explain simply.”
Despite his fears, Dorothea didn’t look confused in the least. Her fingers rapped the table as she considered his words. “Is it just about the skills connected to the Crests or also about power levels?”
“The former.” Linhardt blinked, surprised. “I wouldn’t have pegged this as an interest of yours.”
“I know enough,” Dorothea said with a delicate shrug. “A passing knowledge, though far more than I desire.”
There was a story there that she wasn’t telling. Linhardt sipped his sugary-sweet coffee. “You’re in a lot of shows now.”
“Dozens each year,” Dorothea confirmed with a confident smirk. There was that fire in her eyes, the one he’d seen whenever she’d marched past any of her detractors, the one that he couldn’t help but follow even if he was across the room. “I doubt you can pass a corner without a poster—though, then again,” she tapped her eyes. “you’re not going out, are you?”
He couldn’t deny that. “Research takes up too much time.”
“Research and napping, right?” Dorothea asked with a wink. She giggled when he reluctantly nodded. “Still lost in your own world. I’m glad that much hasn’t changed.”
The fondness in her voice almost took his breath away. It was strange. They hadn’t met in years and yet, it was all too easy to talk to her, to slip into old patterns. He’d asked her to dinner once, but they’d never gone—he’d kept putting it off. The war, the rebuilding, the research; there was always something else to do.
Would it be too late to do so now?
“Dorothea—” Sunlight through the window hit her and something glinted around her neck. It was a golden chain looped through a small, simple golden band.
Noticing his stare, Dorothea glanced down and softly gasped. “Oops.” Sheepishly, she pulled out the chain, her hand curling delicately around the ring at the end. Her expression softened. “My little secret. I can’t let my adoring audience know about this just yet.”
“You got married,” Linhardt replied automatically, putting two and two together.
She gently dropped the ring under her dress’s collar. “Yes.”
This time, his breath did get knocked out of him.
“I didn’t think I would, after…everything. Especially when Ingrid…” Dorothea’s eyes darkened as her voice trembled. Even after all these years, their former friends’ deaths still hit hard. “When they all died. It was hard to want that anymore. Though I…” She peeked up, her eyes meeting his, her gaze lingering as she continued, “I did have second thoughts. I waited…though I’m not sure for what.”
He could hear the unsaid words, the pointed barbs that led back to that delayed dinner, to that chance that he’d never taken.
To that chance he could now never take.
She broke eye contact first. “Anyways, I thought I’d just throw myself into work. Become the second Manuela, so to speak. It was hard at first, but I started to get bigger and bigger roles in the local opera troupes.” Dorothea sipped her coffee. “I didn’t have too many fans at first, but…well, I had one consistent one. Hanneman made sure to come to every single opening. Sometimes with Manuela, sometimes alone…”
Her gaze grew tender. “He’d promised I’d always know kindness, and despite my doubts, he proved it.”
Linhardt stared down at his coffee, at the murky darkness. He’d heard about her shows, from Hubert, from Bernetta, from Hanneman himself, the times they’d collaborated on Crestology. Once, just once, he’d bought a ticket, but he’d never been able to bring himself to go.
“One time, he’d missed the show. It felt so wrong—even after the curtains fell, I didn’t feel right until he came running as everyone was leaving, flowers in his hand.” Dorothea giggled, shaking her head. “The silly man apologized. He was so flustered—it was adorable.”
Now she looked up, locking eyes with him once more. “I remembered what you said. I’m not the kind of girl to wait—I do what I want, with my head held up high. So I asked him out.”
“Oh.”
“And then I had to ask him out a few more times because he thought I was just teasing.” Dorothea clicked her tongue. “As though I would take courtship lightly. He ruined all of my plans of nobility and marry rich.” Her hand rested on her chest, tapping the hidden ring. “But I can’t say I regret any of it.”
He couldn’t say the same. Linhardt curled his fingers. “Are you happy?”
“Very much so. It isn’t the whirlwind romance I’d imagined as a girl, or the quiet practicality I’d accepted as a teen but…” Dorothea smiled softly. “Love is a more complicated thing than that. It’s not the life I pictured but I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
She sets down her spoon. Just when had she finished her meal? His own coffee had grown cold.
“No, I suppose that is a lie.” Dorothea reached forward, her warm hand covering his. Despite the passing years, remembrances of the war didn’t fade easily and he could feel her scars and callouses. She squeezed his hand, lingering for a moment before pulling away. “I do have one regret.”
Linhardt turned his hand and squeezed back before she could escape. “Me too.”
She closed her eyes. Her smile turned bittersweet as she stood up, her hand slipping out of his grasp. “It was good seeing you, Linhardt.”
He could only watch as she left, as her figure appeared outside the window and she stepped into a waiting carriage. The seat across from him was empty, only a lipstick stained cup and some cheesecake crumbs proving that Dorothea had been there, had been so close and yet so far at the same time.
The coffee was cold. Linhardt picked it up anyways, turning slightly to stare out the window. Across the street, a giant poster for Dorothea’s latest opera was plastered on a wall, her enigmatic smile dominating the paper.
He took a sip but all the sugar in the world couldn’t stop the bitterness filling him now.
Let’s have a proper dinner, she’d asked him once. Not in the dining hall, but out. The two of us.
He should have taken her then.
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admiringlove · 3 years
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hurtful things
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+synopsis: genshin boys and the hurtful things they said.
+genre: angst; headcanons.
+characters: kaeya; diluc; childe; zhongli.
+warnings: swearing; crying; implied panic attack.
+order: hey bubs! i saw you doing requests and i HAD to ask for genshin angst :) spare me some tears pls <//3 preferably w kaeya or diluc or childe :) [submitted by @crackheadsara​]
+author’s note: okay so i included zhongli bc he’s the love of my life, also i needed comfort from him after writing such hurtful things :D
+navigation: main menu, genshin menu.
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— KAEYA.
“i’m better off without you.”
you know from the way your door was knocked in the middle of the night on a weekday after months, that it’s kaeya. you rub your eyes sleepily, trudging towards the door as anger and doubt fuse into a nasty green in your mind. 
you unlock the door, pulling it open to see the man with the eyepatch tapping his foot on the deck of your home impatiently. he smirks when his eye lands on you, attempting to walk in but stopping himself when he realizes you're standing at the door, unmoving. 
"kaeya, it's three in the morning. and it's monday. i have to report to jean in three hours," you mumble tiredly as you look up at him. the lamp grass by your windowsill outside and the moonlit night accentuated his cerulean eyes and contrasting coffee-colored skin. he frowns, peering down at you as he asks, "may i come in?"
you shrug, opening the door wide as you let the man in. he places his sword on the table and proceeds to walk into the bedroom when you ask, "where have you been for the past two weeks?"
"work," his reply is the same. you let out a sigh in impatience as you retort, "that's the same excuse as always."
he was tired and wanted to sleep off the fatigue from his latest mission. but when he hears you say that, something in him snaps and he turns around, his jaw clenched and a fixed glare making you a little agitated. he raises an eyebrow as he says, "well, unlike you, i am an actual important member of the knights of favonius."
"kaeya, all i meant was that you're always gone. you never write a letter back even if i send you one, and you somehow manage to come back every single time, expecting that it doesn't hurt me. what am i supposed to do?" your voice is small as you look down, hair drooping towards the ground. you're not even yelling at him, you're just worried. he always leaves you alone(sometimes you tag along, but you couldn't tell why nowadays he'd leave you alone without some sort of warning).
"does it ever occur to you that you're just a hindrance?" he bites back, thinking that you're trying to put up a front. you flinch at his words, causing him to force a jeer before he starts again, "you always come along, so maybe i wanted to be away from you for a bit. that's why i leave without a warning so i don't have to tend to your yapping all day. because i'm better off without you."
you gasp as you look up to his figure, now retreating to your shared bedroom. you hear him fall onto the bed with a content sigh as you stand there, wiping at your tears incessantly as hiccups escape your lips. you bit your tongue to stop yourself from crying, pressing a hand on your mouth to muffle the sounds so you don't disturb kaeya. you get a quick peek in, eyes widening when you see him sound asleep and tucked in. 
so that's how it was, you think. 
the next morning, kaeya wakes up to a cold bed as his arm reaches out to an empty space. his eyes immediately pry open as he wakes up, to see that you weren't here. 
ah, he ponders to himself, you must've gone to tend to your duties. 
he stretches, letting out a yawn before walking out to the kitchen. he smiles when he sees a plate of food left for him on the countertop with a note from you. but somehow, something felt very wrong about this whole ordeal. this had happened before—he had come back from insanely long missions to you before, so what felt different?
and then it hits him. the things he said last night. he frantically looks around, his azure eyes completely drowned in horror as he notices small changes in your shared household. a few picture frames are missing on the living room walls, your keychain isn't on the bookshelf anymore, and worst of all, when he runs into the closet, half of your clothes are gone. 
did you really feel that bad about what he said?
in panic, he runs out and keeps going till he reaches the headquarters of the knights. he barges in this time, not returning the greetings of the guards upfront as he walks into jean's office. 
"where are they?" he pants, "i-i messed up, do you know where they are?"
jean's eyes widen as she says, "our associates were having a hard time handling with the fatui in liyue harbor so they volunteered to go there for sometime."
"how long has it been?"
"they left long ago, it's about to be around ten hours since," she says. kaeya's heart shatters as he hears those words. he hadn't expected you to outright leave like that, but if you had said the same things to him, he definitely would've stormed out. his voice cracks as he looks at the ground in shame, "h-how long until they'll be back?"
"i.. don't know."
he regrets everything he's said. he truly does because he doesn't even notice that tears are streaming down his cheeks until jean comes to his aid. he hates himself for all of it—he hates that he has to live in a home where traces of you are visible everywhere; worst of all, he hates how he knows he lost you for good. even if you come back, he knows you wouldn’t run and melt into his arms like you did before. you’re gone now, fading into the darkness and away from him. 
maybe it was for the best.
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— DILUC.
“you’re nothing but a burden.”
after taking on a few abyss mages and mitachurls, diluc lets a grunt out in pain before you see the slash on his right arm. you gasp, pulling him to the side of the lake as you pull out a bandage and cotton from your bag to clean his wounds. he's reluctant to it at first, but he sits there quietly and broods as you clean the blood with cotton and some type of healing ointment. 
you tie the bandage on his arm, a tiny bit of vermillion liquid seeping through the white cloth before sitting down next to him, finally catching a breath. sighing, you look up at him and say, "that was reckless."
"no, what you did was reckless. who told you to come along with me to dadaupa gorge? you knew what you were getting into when you came along, so don't put this on me," he grumbled, frowning as you look at him with narrowed eyes and furrowed brows. you are sort of hurt, but you know he's only saying this in faux indignation, so it's okay. you chuckle out, beginning, "diluc, i was-"
"i don't know why i even bother with you at this point," he exasperates, looking into the distance behind you. he curses slightly under his breath, his rouge eyes filled to the brim with anger as it finally overflows, "you're nothing but a burden."
your eyes suddenly flick to gape at him in disbelief. you stand up, your voice hitching in your throat as you ask, "diluc, you mean that?"
and it all simmers down into ashes when he mumbles "of course i do" under his breath. your vision is blurry as you walk away from the red-haired man, your body trembling as you almost give away that you're crying your eyes out. you walk back in the direction the two of you came from, leaving your broken heart in the hands of diluc, who sat by the lake not muttering a word after. 
he knows he's said things he doesn't mean; he does that all the time, but you probably knew that. he figures you're leaving to catch a breath of fresh air—to be away from the tension-filled environment for a bit, you had a habit of doing that at home. he sighs as he ponders over his words for a bit. he knew it was wrong to display such harshness to you, but you probably knew he didn't mean anything by it. he always bubbled over rash things when he was frustrated. 
the sun sets in front of him, painting hues of aubergine and peach as it flows down. he wonders where you are, getting up from his spot by the lake to venture towards the path you walked off. 
only when he can't find you, is when he thinks that you might've actually taken offense to his words. although he cares about you sincerely, he finishes his mission first, getting a lead on the abyss order—because protecting monstadt was his first priority. you lingered in his mind every second of every day till he finally got back home. and when he didn't find you there, he asks adelinde about it, who only shakes her head and tells him, "i'm sorry, master diluc, but i haven't seen them come back. i thought they were with you."
it all pieces together in his mind now, how a small gasp had escaped your lips when he had called you a burden. the way you nodded begrudgingly, getting up and walking away from his presence as your shoulders trembled. the way he could hear you choke back a sob, but still ignored it, thinking you had overreacted in the situation. 
he searches the whole city for you. he searches every nook and corner, and even walks into the headquarters of the knights of favonius(he ignores kaeya's teases instead of biting back this time). and when he finally sees you, he holds himself back. his hand is suspended awkwardly in the air as he reaches out for you, your back turned towards him. 
maybe this was better—maybe it was a good thing that you had walked away from him. this way, the abyss order won't be able to harm you. this way, he won't be able to harm you. this way, you'll be safe and sound, away from the storm known as diluc ragnvindr.
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— CHILDE.
“it’s not like you mean anything to me.”
it's not often you see childe. he's always in liyue, and you're here, stuck in monstadt or snezhnaya. it's cold today(as it always is) in snezhnaya, the snow covered almost everything outside as you looked out of your window, sipping on hot coffee as you sigh at the wilting roses on the sill. they'd wilted when you had gone to monstadt and you didn't have the heart to plant new ones.
just thinking about the blue-eyed childish man would make your heart bloom and cheeks flustered. you longed to spend more time with him, really. if only he wasn't affiliated with the fatui, he'd be able to spend more time with you. it had been months since you had seen him, and you longed to be in his arms once again, but who knows when that'll happen again? whenever he comes home, he chooses to spend a night with you and then head back. he'd laugh alongside you, tell you about his adventures, and give small reactions when you told him about yours. and the next morning, you'd wake up to an empty bed with a small note by the table, saying how he has to leave for work.  
a knock at your door snaps you out of your entranced state. as you open the lock and look out, you see childe, standing there with a tired grin and disheveled hair as he walks in without a word. he hands you a small paper bag, saying, "i brought you back something from liyue this time."
the same excuse, you think. it's always the same. he brings back small mementos and souvenirs as a pretense for staying, and by the time you think you can forgive him, he's gone. he plops down onto the sofa, stretching his arm out so you could join him. the thought of confronting him crosses your mind, but you shake it off—since he had only just gotten back. 
the night is the same as always. talking about each others' adventures, eating dinner by the fireplace, laughing alongside one another until you hit the bed. it's quiet now as you watch over his sleeping figure, his lapis-colored eyes now hidden. you sigh as you lay there for hours on end, twiddling with his brown hair as you wait for him to wake up(so this time you can actually say goodbye). 
when his eyes flutter open, he's a little taken aback when he looks over at you to see you wide awake. his brows furrow just a smidge as he says, "you're up."
"well, i wanted to say goodbye this time," you chuckle dryly, "you always leave without waking me up."
"i don't like the way you said that," he says, getting up from his position on the bed. you look away from him, your eyes displaying hurt as you murmur, "i don't like the way you leave."
"well, it's my job. it's not like i'm an adventurer like you, wasting my time around. i'm a harbinger and i have responsibilities," he says. his voice is neither too soft and nor too prickly, and you can tell that he's a little worked up by the way he lightly nips on the skin of his bottom lip as his gaze bores into you. 
"i didn't say you don't. all i said was that you could maybe sometimes stay for more than one night. it feels like you're using me, and when you're bored, you leave."
"oh?" he cocks an eyebrow as he stands up, "i'm using you, huh?"
you grimace at the tone of his voice, and when you look at him, you notice the sheer annoyance he puts up towards you. your voice is small when you ask him if he loves you—because you don't know anymore. seeing him once in a few months for the past few years has sure hurt you more than anything, and if you don't tell him now, then you might never get a chance. 
"what if i say i don't?" he smirks, walking up to you, "it's not like you mean anything to me. what if i agree that i am using you to make myself happy until i'm bored, so i can then throw you away?"
he doesn't like what he's saying either. his mind is screaming at him to stop, but he's worked up. he's irritated by the way you jabbed at him first thing in the morning, even though he knows you're right. his heart almost stops when he looks at the expression on your face after he says those words, and as he reaches out his hand for you, you turn away. 
your voice cracks, and he's sure his heart did as well when you mumble, "i-i'd like you to leave, please."
"wait, i didn't mean-"
"tartaglia," your eyes look into his, perhaps for the last time, as you give him a sad smile, "you don't have to come back to me anymore."
it hurts him as he leaves your home that morning. it hurts him when he comes back months later to see that your home is now empty. it hurts him because he tarnished the you that was once his. 
it hurts him, but he thinks it's for the best if you stay away from him if all he does is bring you pain.
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— ZHONGLI.
“i’d like you to leave me alone.”
zhongli was never one to pick fights. he was peaceful; his thoughts were positive(most of the time), and he almost always preferred to talk about his problem rather than fighting about it—he believes that fighting will only bring pain, so why not confide in one another about our problems instead?
he's quiet. he's not shy(it's quite the opposite, actually), but he's one to prefer to only talk when absolutely necessary. he's the type to listen rather than speak, saying something like, "we have two ears and one mouth. speak less than you listen."
he smiles when his mind goes back to the time when he said that to you while having a cup of tea together, and you'd replied, "my mother used to tell me that when i was a child."
because it's true; every child in liyue harbor has heard those words at least once in their lives. the quality of listening is appreciated more than the quality of speaking—and zhongli, for one, was a listener. 
you, on the other hand, were a speaker. you always woke him up every morning with a smile as bright and everlasting as the sun, babbling about breakfast and tea as he got up from the bed. you were the one that carried conversations on your shoulders on morning walks, you were the one that intertwined your fingers with his as the two of you walked amongst flowers, adoring them as you talked about the contrasting colors of silk flowers and glaze lilies. he loved you for that. he loved you because you were a speaker. he loved you because you were a perfect balance, the only one who could soften his hardened heart. the only one whom he'd chosen to wake up next to in the mornings, the only one whom he'd let ruffle his hair without asking(because he secretly liked it). 
so why had he reversed the roles tonight? why was he the one to bubble out his frustrations to you, speaking in a cold and stern manner instead of the loving tone that was only reserved for you? why was he the one to speak tonight, and why were you the one to listen?
it's not like he was actually frustrated—he was only thinking about something else as you asked him what he wanted for dinner. it surely wasn't your fault when he had poured over turbulent words to you. and he knows that the ones that hurt the most probably were, "i'd like you to leave me alone."
he looks up at the stars, a heavy sigh escaping his lips as he walks back into his shared home with you. he looks around, and when there's no sign of you, he feels himself break apart even more. 
had you actually left? he wants to run to you and tell you he hadn't meant any of those words because he hadn't. he wants to touch you, to caress you, to please you, to make you smile—and he wants to admit he was wrong. he wants to make it right, but he doesn't know where you are. 
he walks into the empty bedroom, sitting on the cold mattress as his eyes sting. he doesn't understand what's happening, or why there are small drops of water falling from his eyes. he doesn't understand why everything feels heavy all of a sudden—his heart, his throat his lungs, everything. he doesn't understand why he feels like he's trapped in a box, and the water seems to be filling up more quickly than he'd prefer. he wants to reach for air, but he can't.
he couldn't breathe without you. 
he hears the door close and immediately gets up in haste to walk to the living room where he sees you take off your boots. you turn around to see him, his disheveled hair and frantic eyes finally calming as he walks over to you and engulfs you in a warm embrace. his throat cleared up, and so did his heart and lungs as he mumbles against your ear, "i'm so sorry."
you smile smally, looking up at him as you cup his cheeks and wipe a stray tear, and mutter, "it's okay, zhongli. stress gets to the best of us."
god, how he loves you. he places a small peck on the top of your forehead as he feels his lips turn upward at your touch and the scent of glaze lilies lingering over you tells him that you'd been to the flower garden. he sleeps with your fingers weaved with his that night and pulls you even closer if you untangle with him in sleep. 
he makes a promise to himself saying he'd never hurt you like that again, and he keeps it.
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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years
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Floating Through Space - Harry Styles
a/n: im literally bursting from excitement over this, i’ve been working on this fic for so long and im pretty satisfied with how it turned out so i hope you’ll like it too! pleas please PLEASE don’t let this flop bc it means a lot to me 🥺 the song featured in the fic is obviously an existing one, i linked it into the right place so you can listen to it and get the vibe of it, that song is what inspired the whole story so i recommend giving it a listen! leave your thoughts and reactions, i can’t wait to read what you thought about the fic!!
pairing: Harry x Famous!Reader
warning: drug use, smut and everything thats wrong with patriarchy lmao
word count: 25.7k
masterlist
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This dressing room is no different than the other one thousand you’ve been to. The plaster on the wall is all cracked up, the red bricks peeking from under it in the corner, the dusty couch looks like it’s been through hell and just sitting on it would probably give you STDs. The mirror on the wall is cracked, the few water bottles you’ve gotten are not even cooled, they’re a warm room temperature. The glorious life of a musician, right?
Moments like this you question why you didn’t just choose to be the obedient daughter and became a surgeon like your parents always wanted you to be. You’d have a steady future and a nice income, a decent career instead of having to perform at a different bar every other night for nicks and pennies that barely cover your rent at the end of the month. But that wouldn’t be you. Wearing scrubs, smiling at patients, throwing out your dignity along with your dreams, you wouldn’t have been true to yourself if you chose that life. Besides, you’d still be in school, barely nearing the halfpoint of your education if you decided to go along with your parents’ plan and it’s clearer than daylight that the school system is just not for you. It would be pure torture if you had to sit in classes for a decade just to work a job you never even wanted.
Looking around the small dressing room you cast your eyes over your band that consists of three people. It’s a temporary set up from three guys you met along your way, all of the struggling musicians as you and you saw the as opportunities. Places would rather have a band play with several men in it than just put one single woman on stage and pray for the best. It’s the sexist part of the industry not enough people talk about. You can’t even count how many pitying stares you’ve gotten through the years when you stated that you want to make a career as a solo female singer.
“Honey, you ain’t making it without at least one man behind you,” is what they’ve always told you. So you’ve gotten yourself three until you could stand on your own two feet without a male backup. You’re using them just as much as they are using you. They were already a band when you joined them, the lead singer just disappeared to thin air with her boyfriend and left them incomplete, so you joined forces to navigate your way together in the depth of the music industry, looking for that big jump everyone is dreaming about.
Standing in front of the cracked mirror you fix your eyeliner, checking yourself once again. Your thrifted checkered suit looks radiant on you especially with the neon green see-through top underneath, showing off a black bralette. It’s a male suit, hanging a little baggy on you at places, but you still feel like you’re pulling off the look. Your thick eyeliner makes your eyes appear even bigger than they already are and your hair is in an unruly mop of curls, making your appearance complete.
You’ve received tons of critiques over your outfits, but they are the only thing you are not changing on yourself.
“Don’t wear men’s pants.”
“You’d look better in a dress.”
“Why do you look like a guy?”
“What a shame to hide such a gorgeous body in clothes that weren’t meant for girls.”
Each and every comment is burned into your mind forever and you’ll never stop fighting against the judgment women has to face for not being the conventional beauty all females are expected to be.
There’s a knock on the door and the person behind it barges in without waiting for an answer. The tall, bald guy rushes in, looking a little stressed, but that’s kind of the normal for the owner.
“I’m not sure how to say it, but… you are not performing tonight,” he simply states and your anger sets in faster than ever. You’ve had gigs get cancelled, but not minutes before going on stage. However, he is still not done with his little informative speech. “And your instruments need to be used by another band tonight.”
“What the fuck?” Trey, the drummer jumps to his feet. “No way I’m letting someone else play my drum set!”
“You’ll get half the money if you let it happen,” the owner answers.
“Wait, what band did you find minutes before start?” you ask in complete shock.
“There’s this group celebrating a birthday in the VIP section and some boy band is apparently with them. Birthday girl requested to have the stage for them.”
“And you’re just cancelling on us that easily?” you snap.
“Not that I have a choice. If I don’t do it they are leaving and I’m losing a big amount from the night. Sorry guys, but this is strictly business.”
“I can’t fucking believe this,” you laugh bitterly, staring up at the ceiling. This would have been a great chance for all of you, you’ve been trying to get a gig here for months, knowing that a lot of people from the industry fancies it, you might have caught someone’s eyes, but it’s definitely not happening now.
“Are you letting them use your stuff or not?” he urges, hands on his hips as he looks at the four of you impatiently.
“But what about our gig? We’ve been on the waiting list for months, when can we actually perform?”
“Uh, I don’t know. We’re pretty booked, maybe sometime in the summer?”
“Summer?” you gasp in disbelief. “It’s fucking February!”
“Are you lending them your stuff or not? I don’t have the time for your little tantrum!”
“Yeah, if we get the money they can use it,” Connor, the bass guitarist answers before you explode right then and there. The owner walks out with that, leaving the four of you behind, forgotten and humiliated.
“I can’t fucking believe it,” Trey groans, plopping down on the couch, covering his eyes with his tattooed arm.
“This is fucking bullshit,” you scoff under your breath, reaching for your bag to grab your pack of cigarettes you keep in it especially for cases like this, whenever you are about to go around and punch every living thing in the face in your reach.
Kicking the backdoor open you lean against the cold brick wall as you light the cigarette and start puffing vigorously, trying to get as much nicotine into your system as possible. You notice a group of guys standing near you in the alleyway, laughing on something, having a great time, oblivious to how hurt and angry you are feeling just a few feet away. You hear frictions of their conversation and it’s clear they are British judging from the accents that are hitting your ears. You finish your cigarette pretty fast and immediately reach for another one even though you know you shouldn’t have even smoked that first one, but you just can’t help it. It’s either the smoking or you’re going after the owner and kick him in the balls for being a bitch.
“Oi, can I ask for one?”
Glancing to the side you see that one of the guys has approached you, smiling at you warmly he nods towards the pack in your hands. Nodding you hold it out for him and he takes one. Before he could even ask for the lighter, you throw it at him and he catches it easily.
“Thanks,” he nods, holding the cigarette between his lips before lighting it and passing the lighter back to you.
“Lou, you really shouldn’t smoke,” you hear one of the others speak up as the rest of the group slowly joins you and the one you just helped out.
“S’fine, don’t act like me motha’,” he shrugs, taking a drag from the cigarette.
“At least not before we go on stage,” the blonde one shakes his head at his friend and your eyebrows shoot up.
“Oh, so you’re the band that’s gonna play?” you ask with a forced smile, already feeling your blood boiling. Who the fuck they are and why do they deserve to steal your gig?!
“We’re just playing a couple of songs,” another speaks up shrugging his shoulders. “No big deal.”
“Glad it’s no big deal to you, because it would have been to the band that was robbed from tonight because of you,” you spat at them, clearly surprising them with your harsh reply.
“I assume you are part of that band, right?” the on with the curly hair speaks up, his green eyes burning down at you.
“Nice job, Sherlock,” you groan, taking another drag from your cigarette.
“You could play with us,” he offers, the others nodding in agreement.
“I don’t need your pity,” you scowl at them. “Bringing me on stage to try to make yourselves look like the good guys is not necessary. I’m just fed up with people like you.” The truth is coming out of you easier than ever. All the years on injustice is seemingly erupting from you, pouring down on these five.
“People like us?” the dark haired one asks with a confused look.
“Yeah,” you nod with a bitter chuckle. “Five conventionally hot guys grouped together for a band, making every girl between the age of ten and thirty scream just by a wink. I don’t know where you came from, but I’m betting my head that you’ve had it easier than others.”
“It’s not nice to assume things when you don’t know anything about us,” Curly speaks up, tilting his head to the side.
“Oh, I’ve seen enough not to care about what’s nice and what’s not,” you chuckle shaking your head as you take another long puff from your cigarette and throw the butt to the ground, stepping on it. “Who are you even? Some Back Street Boys 2.0?” you ask, folding your arms on your chest, earning a heartfelt laugh from the blondie.
“I kinda like her,” he smirks around his friends. “We’re called One Direction, you haven’t heard of us?”
“Not even once,” you shake your head.
“That’s kinda humbling,” the one with the cigarette smiles. “We’re from the UK. I’m Louis, that’s Liam, Niall, Zayn and Harry.”
“I would say it’s nice to meet you, but it would be nicer if you guys didn’t just take my gig and lessen me with half my paycheck,” you smile at them sweetly before rolling your eyes.
“Wait, what? They’re not paying you because of us?” Liam asks.
“We only get half the money for lending you our instruments.”
“Let us pay the other half then,” Harry offers right away, but you just laugh at him.
“It’s not about the money, Prince Harry,” you smirk at him, tilting your head to the side. “It’s about justice. How is that air that you just waltz in here and take our time and chance? What if there’s a producer out there who would have liked our music and offered a record deal? What if someone would have taken a video of us performing, put it up to YouTube and it would have gone viral? I assume you never had to go through this phase where you have to beg for every minute on stage so you can at least earn enough money to pay rent. You don’t seem like the type of band who had to perform in smelly bars four times a week for a ridiculous amount of money.”
They stay silent and you know you were right.
“I’m not saying you had it easy, but I’m sure you have no idea what it could have been. And I’m fed up with men walking over others just to have what they want.”
“Look, it wasn’t our intention to ruin your gig. Have your set with your band and then we’ll play a few songs too after that,” Liam offers, but you shake your head.
“No, we weren’t supposed to be just your opening act and it’ll turn into that. So have a nice evening, enjoy your showtime, I’m out.”
Pushing yourself away from the wall you walk back into the building and grabbing your stuff from the dressing room you move out to the bar area, desperately needing a drink.
Sitting on the last stool at the bar you ask for straight tequila and two vodka shots knowing it’ll do the job for the evening and pulling your phone out of your bag, you open up Google. Searching the name One Direction you’re met with quite a few hits and you start scrolling through them, reading about the five boys you just had an encounter with. Just as you thought, they didn’t start off as a traditional band, having put together at a talent show just three years ago, getting such a major push so early in their career, they have no idea how struggling it is to make it in the industry. They surely had their fair share of ups and downs, but they will never know what it’s like to sweat blood and tears for your dream when everyone just wants to drag you down and tell you you’ll never make it.
The shots and half of the tequila is gone, your band joined you to at least get wasted as you watch the technicians set the stage for a band that’s not you, but gonna play with your stuff. Sitting on the stool you’re having a fairly good time thanks to the alcohol when you spot Harry making his way towards you in the crowd.
“Aren’t you supposed to be getting ready backstage?” you ask with an eyeroll as he joins your little circle, the guys eyeing him curiously. Ignoring your comment he pulls out a piece of paper handing it to you. As you unfold it you almost want to throw it back at him.
“This is to make up for what you lost tonight,” he says nodding down at the check in your hands.
“I told you I don’t need your money,” you firmly answer, but Trey grabs the check from your hands.
“But I do!” he snorts. He is such a pig.
“Let us do at least this one thing for you. We really do feel bad for taking your time and the offer to come on stage with us still stands.”
“No thank you,” you shoot him a fake smile before downing the rest of your tequila, the drink burning down your throat. Looking back at Harry you keep your eye locked on him as he watches you intently. He is a good-looking guy, you have to give that to him, but the circumstances you’ve met under just made it impossible for you not to hate him for the privileges he is being handed every day while you fight your way through life.
Harry sighs in defeat nodding as he licks his lips. For a split second, guilt takes over you for the way you’ve been acting towards him and the other boys, but then you remember that you don’t even know him. For all you know, he can be a royal asshole with the face of an angel. You can’t let guilt chew you and spit you out, you have to keep your guards up.
“Alright. We really are sorry. I’ll… see you around,” he nods before turning around to walk away.
You watch them perform their biggest hits, the whole place going crazy over the impromptu One Direction concert they just got for basically free. The VIP area is going crazy over the boys and with each sang song, you feel yourself getting more and more hopeless about your future as a musician. Here you are on a Saturday night, robbed from a job you’ve worked hard for, watching five British boys take your place on the stage that’s supposed to be yours tonight. You catch Harry’s eyes quite often while he is on stage, he keeps glancing in your way, a hint of guilt glistening in his green irises as he sings their songs with perfect vocals. You can tell he feels bad for the situation and you didn’t make it any easier on him or any of the boys, but you’re not really one to beat around the bush. They deserved to know what others in the industry below them have to deal with every day. It’s not always as glamorous as people might think and you’re the living example of that.
You don’t stick around for long after the boys are done on stage, you help your bandmates pack their stuff and head home before Harry or any other members of One Direction can find you.
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Walking past the news stand that’s on the corner of your street, you stop upon seeing your own face smiling back at you from the cover of People Magazine, the title catching your attention.
“Grammy nominee Y/N Y/L/N shares her secret to her one of a kind fashion style.”
Grabbing the magazine off the stand you pay for it and continue your way home, holding the copy to your chest with a warm feeling in your heart.
It’s been only a week since the nominations have come out, but it still feels like a dream. You didn’t just get nominated in the category of Best New Artist, but your album Hands of Power got nominated as Best Album and your biggest hit of last year, Sleepless is running for the title of Best song. Three nominations the first time earning a spot on the list. Not bad.
Just as you walk into your place, your phone buzzes, the ever so smiling face of your manager staring back at you from the screen.
“Hey!” you sing into the phone, holding it to your ear with your shoulder, taking off your boots as you walk further down the hallway.
“Are you home already?”
“Yes, just arrived.”
“Great, I’ll be there in ten,” she announces and ends the call. Chuckling you just shake your head, dropping the phone to the coffee table before you move to the bedroom and change into something more comfortable. The flared jeans looked fire on you today, but you rather wear something looser when you’re at home.
You barely have the time to start the water for a tea when Taylor storms through your door using her keys you’ve given her some time ago. She is wearing all white that looks fantastic with her almond skin tone, a knitted sweater tucked into a maxi skirt, paired with strappy heels, she is always so elegant and perfectly dressed for whatever occasion.
“I have knee-shaking news, girl!” she announces as she throws her purse to the couch before joining you in the kitchen.
“I’m going to be the next Bond girl?” you joke smiling to yourself as you get two mugs from the cupboard.
“Better than that!” she cheers. “You are going to perform at the Grammy’s, baby!” she screams throwing her hands into the air as your jaw drops to the floor.
“You’re not just kidding with me, right?!”
“I would never play such a dirty joke with you. It’s one hundred percent true, I had an hour long phone call with some bloke today and they want you.”
“Yes!” you scream in excitement, jumping up and down like a child that just got a pack of candy. “I’ll make the Grammy’s my bitch!” you cheer, making Taylor laugh.
“Alright, Miss Dominatrix. We still have a lot of things to discuss and there’s one more thing about the performance.”
“Oh God, is this the part where you say something that ruins it completely?” you sigh in defeat as you take the kettle and pour the water into the mugs, dropping a filter into each.
“I don’t think it ruins it,” she shakes her head, but you have a feeling you won’t like what she has to say. “They want it to be like a… joined performance. You’d start off with Sleepless, then it would kind of mesh into your partner’s song and they would end it with one of their own songs.”
“Okay, that doesn’t sound bad,” you nod.
“See?” she smiles warmly.
“Do we know who I’m going to perform with?”
“Harry Styles.”
You almost drop both mugs the moment the name is mentioned, but you manage to get them to the kitchen island and slip them to the counter, Taylor giving you a questioning look at your wide-eyed expression.
“Uh, I’m not sure that’s… gonna work,” you clear your throat.
“You’re not sure your duet with the biggest male artist can work? Why is that?”
Licking your lips you try to find the right words to say it, but you’re not even sure why you got so shocked over it. Probably because the last time you saw him, you were still nobody, playing gigs at no name bars and he took your spot on the stage with One Direction. It’s weird, but since you’ve finally made it in the industry, you haven’t crossed paths with him and this would be the first time you meet after seven years.
“I’m not sure if he remembers it, but we’ve met before.”
“You and Harry?”
“Yes. I was playing with The Gambits years ago, it was before I started putting out covers on my own. We were supposed to play at this bar but they cancelled on us, because One Direction was there that night and someone wanted them to play instead of us, so we lost the gig. I had a pretty… harsh conversation with him and the band, basically telling them that their pretty man privilege is what ruins the careers of talented women.” “Oh Jesus, Y/N. Why haven’t I heard of this before?” Taylor sighs leaning on her elbows on the countertop.
“Not that it’s something that would just come up in a conversation,” you shrug. “And as I said, he might not even remember it. It was a long time ago.”
“I know you are all about your rebellious past, good for you, but sometimes you’re making my job really fucking hard,” she sighs, grabbing her phone, already typing a message to God knows who. “Starting beef with Harry Styles before you even made a name for yourself? Who does that?”
“It’s not beef!” you protest. “I just gave them my piece of mind.”
“We’ll see what he thinks about it. I have to make a few calls,” she announces before walking out, already on the phone with someone.
Sitting on a stool, staring into your mug you think back at the time you met him. It feels like a lifetime ago when you were fighting to stay afloat, trying to make through the days, barely hanging on a thread. You didn’t know that five years later you’d sign your first record deal as a solo artist and seven years from that night, you’d be a Grammy nominee. It was a long and challenging time for sure with way more downs than ups until you finally got on track and you’ll never forget where you came from. Not when even as an acknowledged artist, you still face judgment and hatred no matter what you do. Being a solo female singer sometimes feels like harder than being president of the country and there are just so many things that need to change in the world of music, you will never stop fighting for girls that are in the same shoe you once were.
Through the years you’ve followed the career of the boys, especially Harry’s. You read about Zayn’s parting, their so-called hiatus and how they all went solo soon after. Genre-wise Harry’s work is what stands the closest to you, and you’ve witnessed all the backlash he has faced during his time in the spotlight. The shaming for whatever women he chose to date, his choice to get into acting and the way he has been dressing. People just don’t seem to understand they can’t have control over any of these and they’ve tried to bring him down one too many times, but he has been thriving lately, anyone can see that.
Your mug empties out by the time Taylor returns, taking her previous stop at the kitchen island.
“Alright, I set up a meeting with Harry and his manager for tomorrow. They still haven’t decided on the performance and apparently, Harry would like to meet you before giving his answer.”
“Oh God, he remembers me,” you growl under your breath.
“Or maybe he doesn’t and just wants to meet the person he is supposed to perform with. We can never know. We’re meeting them at his manager’s office at eleven tomorrow.”
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One night is enough to make you go crazy over such a small thing as meeting someone. It’s not like you are nervous to see him because of who he is, it’s more about knowing what he thinks about you after all these years, in case he remembers you. He saw you as a struggling artist at rock bottom and though your encounter didn’t last long and he didn’t know you on a deeper, personal level, you still fear that he remembers and thinks that you’ve lost yourself over the years.
Authenticity has been a huge issue in your life. Early in your career, everyone wanted to change you. The way you dress, your hair, the style of music you write, nothing was good enough as it was, they wanted you to become someone else, someone who was not you. You fought all attempts until the right person came through and accepted you as yourself, but a tiny voice in the back of your mind kept telling you that they succeeded, that somewhere along the fight you did lose yourself and became what you always feared to be.
Meeting Harry is like meeting a piece of your past and having to face what you’ve become. It’s going to be like a mirror right in front of you and what you’ll see might not be what you expect.
Wearing your bright red dungaree with an oversized vintage shirt and a pair of white sneakers, you definitely don’t look like you’re dressed for a business meeting, but when did you ever? Pushing your hair back with a pair of cat eye shades, you leave a little earlier, knowing well traffic is horrible in these hours. You arrive to the office building just minutes before eleven, Taylor has already texted that she has arrived and which office you should come to. When you finally find the door you’ve been looking for, you take a moment to yourself before knocking.
“Come in!” a male voice calls out and you walk in. Taylor is sitting on the sofa that’s pushed against the wall on the left, a man is sitting behind the enormous desk and then there is Harry, standing by the window, his hands hidden in the pockets of his black slacks, and old Rolling Stones t-shirt hanging loosely on his frame as his eyes meet yours upon your arrival.
“Hey, I would say I’m sorry for being late, but I’m actually exactly on time,” you smirk, closing the door behind you. The man stands from the desk and walking around he meets at the front, holding a hand out for you.
“Perfectly on time,” he smiles warmly. “I’m Jeffrey Azoff, nice to meet you.”
“Y/N Y/L/N. Nice to meet you too.”
“And this here is Harry,” he motions towards the man who has stepped closer and as you look back at him, you’re met with a blank expression for a moment so you can’t figure out if he remembers you or not. But then, a tiny smile tugs on his lips as he holds his hand out for you.
“We’ve met before, right?” he simply questions, and your eyes flicker over to Taylor in a kind of “See? I told you!” manner before you look back at Harry and shake his hand.
“Yeah, we have,” you nod. “A long time ago.”
“Congrats for your nominations,” he smirks, his hand letting go of yours and your let out a soft chuckle.
“Well, thank you. Back at you.”
“Alright, why don’t we start this discussion? We have a lot to go over,” Jeff suggests and you sit beside Taylor while Harry stays near the window, as if he is trying to soak up the sunshine coming through it that’s painting his skin a golden shade.
The concept is simple. The performance would be a mashup from Sleepless and Harry’s song Golden with an exciting and fresh way of mixing the two songs together in the middle, making your song flow into his in a smooth and effortless way. The songs sound compatible and you already have an idea how to mash them together for the transition, but you can’t help but feel doubts over the performance.
“What are your concerns exactly?” Jeff questions.
“Not to come off too harsh, but why is my song the first one?” you ask, earning a few puzzled looks. “If Harry finishes it off, he is going to be the one people will remember more and he’ll get the applause as well. The riffs in the songs allow them to be switched, how come it’s not me who comes second?”
You can see the shock on Jeffrey’s face at how straight-forward you were about your concern and that you even dared to speak up about the issue. He clearly hasn’t had to face anything similar before and when he glances at Harry you follow his gaze as well, but instead of shock, what you see on his face is amusement. He is smirking, tapping his fingers against his chin as he stares back at you.
“She has a point,” he nods and you take a deep breath. For a moment, you really thought this is going to be the part where you are thrown off and Harry makes the performance only his.
“I, uhh—this is what’s been requested,” Jeff answers and you tilt your head.
“Okay, can we make a request to change it?” you simply ask, eyeing Taylor next to you who is typing on her iPad vigorously, taking notes of everything that’s said. She is already used to what you’re like, she is not even surprised you came up with the prompt to change.
“Hold on, so just because you want to be second, you get to be?” Harry questions, but he doesn’t come off as harsh, it seems like he is entertained by the conversation. “Does this mean I don’t deserve to be the second one?”
“That’s-That’s not what I meant,” you answer, taken aback from his accusation and you hate to admit, but he is right. You addressed the issue, but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve the spot either.
“Alright, so then we need to seek a solution that benefits the both of us,” he offers, walking closer from the sunlight and you follow his every movement.
“We could do some kind of medley? Do an ultimate mashup from more songs and have more smaller parts split between us, finishing it together,” you suggest and he nods.
“That could work, but I have something else on my mind.”
“And what would that be?” Jeff asks, a little lost about the situation as he watches the two of you exchange ideas.
“We could write a song together, a duet, and perform that instead of our solo stuff.”
“What?” you snap right away. “You want to write a whole new song just for the Grammy’s?”
“Why not?” he smiles carefreely. “We have almost two entire months to do it, albums have been written in shorter periods, I’m sure we can handle just one song. And I think a collaboration would be a hit for the both of us now.”
You look at Taylor who just stares back at you, ignoring the panic in your eyes.
“Don’t look at me,” she tells you. “I can see the collaboration working, it could be a huge hit.”
“And what, we’re gonna release it as a single after the show? Whose song is it going to be? I don’t have an album coming up until next year, do you get to have it on your third one then?”
“We can put it out as just a single. No one has to have it on any albums,” Harry replies. “If we released it after the show, it would be just the right timing. Neither of us had any new songs out in a while.” Clenching your jaw you’re trying to find a way out of this collaboration, though you’re not even sure yourself why. Taylor sees right through you, knowing well you’re planning your escape, but she has other plans apparently.
“Y/N, let’s have a few words outside,” she pushes herself up and pulls you with her. Once the door is shut behind the two of you she starts right away. “What the fuck is your problem? The song is a huge thing, it would be an instant hit with him on it!”
“Why do I need a song with him to stay relevant?” you question, folding your arms on your chest.
“No one said it’s about that. But we both know it would be a great push to your name that Jordan has stomped over not so long ago, calling you a Feminist Nazi.”
“Don’t even fucking mention him!” you whisper yell, refusing to even think about that trashbag of a man that ruined your life with his fake accusations.
“Look, I know what you are thinking, that you’ll be seen as just an object next to him, a pair of boobs and nice legs, but that’s not his brand. He doesn’t need you to be sexy next to him, he is known for his honest and real works that go farther than just twerking and being a hoe. We both know he produces meaningful music, so why are you so against it?”
“I just… I-I’m scared to work with him,” you finally admit and it’s the first thing today that surprises Taylor.
“Scared? Thought you’re not scared of anything,” she huffs.
“I never said that,” you give her a look. “Harry met me when I was nobody, it was just me and my big mouth, trying to find my breakout. What if we start working together and he sees that I completely lost that version of myself? I would feel like a liar, an impostor.”
“You are overreacting,” Taylor sighs. “You’ve changed on your way here, but I doubt you are that far from the girl he met before. I know we didn’t meet just a few years after, but I can assure you, you’re still that big-mouthed pain in the ass who fights every norm in the industry like no one else.”
You know she is right, she is always right. Taylor knows you too well, that’s why you love working with her, but sometimes, her honesty throws you way off, especially when she is stating the truth.
The two of you rejoin the two men in the office and they both look at you with anticipation as you fold your arms on your chest and move your gaze over to Harry.
“I would… love to work on a song with you.”
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When you agreed to work with Harry you didn’t think you’d find yourself heading over to his house a few days later to have a writing session, but he offered right away that day in the office and Taylor accepted it before you could protest. You’ve had a day filled with meetings and fittings and now you’re rolling up his driveway after punching the security code in that he shared with you over text.
You’ve exchanged numbers on the spot and just like that, you’ve become one of the few people on this world that could contact Harry Styles anytime they want to.
You chose to be casual for the occasion, wearing a pair of black sweatpants and a white hoodie, you like to be comfortable whenever you’re working on new music and Harry’s presence won’t change your ways about that. You’re not sure what to expect, if you’re being honest you’re still afraid of being alone with Harry and do such an emotional thing together as writing a song.
The front door opens just as you get out of your car, grabbing your bag from the passenger seat. Harry walks out wearing a pair of shorts and a green hoodie, looking like he hasn’t left the house all day.
“Hey, you found the address easily?” he asks smiling as you walk up to him.
“Yeah, everything went fine.”
“Do you want something to drink or eat maybe?” he offers as the two of you walk inside. If you’re being honest, you’re starving, the last time you had anything to eat was between two meetings around ten, but nothing since then, just a granola bar. But you’re a first time guest, you can’t just eat up his fridge, like you’re old pals, right?
However, Harry can see right through you.
“You haven’t had anything in a long time, right?” he softly asks and you purse your lips, feeling awkward already and you haven’t been here for more than two minutes. “I can make you a sandwich, if you’d like.” “Harry, no need, I—“ “No need, but I want to. Come on,” he nods at you, making you follow him into the kitchen. “So, who would have thought we would be here now, huh?” he smirks at you as he gathers the ingredients and starts working on your food while you sit on one of the stools at his kitchen island.
“Not me,” you admit chuckling. “I kind of didn’t think I would see you again, I mean, personally. I was seeing you a lot on TV after that.”
“Now might be a good time to confess that, that night wasn’t the last time I saw you.”
“What?”
“I went to one of your gigs a few weeks later. Stayed at the back, I just really wanted to see you play.”
“And what did you think?” you ask tilting your head to the side. Harry smirks, his eyes meeting yours before they return to the food under his hands.
“You absolutely smashed it. And I felt even worse for taking your time away that night. The people were robbed from a mind-blowing performance and had to see five annoying guys clown on the stage,” he laughs making you chuckle too. “I wasn’t surprised when your name surfaced a few years later. Knew you’d make it at one point.” He joins you at the island and slides the plate in front of you with a warm smile.
“Thank you,” you mumble smiling shyly before you start eating and only after the first bite you feel just how hungry you’ve been. “Now that we are at it, I want to apologize for the way I talked to you guys back then. I feel like I was a bigger asshole than I should have been and the whole situation wasn’t entirely your fault.”
“No need to apologize,” he shakes his head. “You were absolutely right. We had no business being on stage that night and what you said actually made us think about where we came from and appreciate our career more. You were right about having it easy at the beginning. We never had the phase where we had to push our way to the top like other artists, our first days were broadcasted on TV, giving us the biggest push ever.”
It’s good to hear he is not holding grudges against you for whatever went down in the past. You eat in silence while Harry types a response to a message on his phone before turning it with the screen down to pay his full attention to you.
“I actually just messaged Niall that we are working together and he is losing his shit over it,” he chuckles softly.
“You guys still talk?”
“Yeah, sometimes. Not all of us thought,” he adds, pressing his lips together.
“You miss being with the band?”
“It’s… good to rely on someone in certain situations. As a solo artist, you only have yourself and that’s about it. But I think you already know that.”
“I never really liked being in a band,” you admit.
“How come? I think you fit in well with The Gambits.”
You shrug, chewing on your bite slowly. It’s probably not the best time to admit that you prefer working on your own, when you’re about to get into a duet with him.
“I uhh… I always imagined myself being a solo artist and I just couldn’t stay with the guys too long, especially when I got my record deal.”
“Why?” Letting out a long breath you lick your lips looking at him.
“I would have never made it in a band with three guys. It would have always been about which one I’m sleeping with, who am I having an affair with or if I’m lesbian because I’m not hooking up with any of them. This is just how it goes for women.”
Harry stays quiet, taking your words in as you finish the sandwich that was literally lifesaving. You wash the plate even when he tells you to just leave it in the sink, and once that’s done, the two of you move over to his little home studio in the basement of his house.
“So, where do we start?” you ask, making yourself comfortable in one of the armchairs while he grabs an acoustic guitar and sits on the one next to you.
“How do you usually start writing?” he asks scratching his chin before he rests his hands on the body of the guitar.
“Well, most of the times I write when I’m pissed about something,” you huff and Harry smirks at you.
“Nothing pissed you off lately?”
“Not enough to make me write a song,” you point out. “See, this is one of the reasons why I was hesitant to write a song with you. It doesn’t come that easily for me.”
“And what were the other reasons?” You shut your mouth at his question, you weren’t expecting him to pick it up, but apparently, he listens more than you thought.
“It’s… a long story.”
“And we have all the time,” he smiles slyly. “But of course, don’t feel pressured to share. I just thought it would be nice to get to know each other more so we can work together easier.”
Harry starts strumming his guitar gently, playing random riffs as you watch him, chewing on your bottom lip. Taylor asked you to try and be more open than you usually are and though part of you wants to keep the wall high between you and him, something is telling you to try and reach out to him.
“I didn’t want to do it, because I didn’t want to be seen as just a pretty face next to you. In duets between a man and a woman, females are often seen as just an object, a sight for the eyes but not as serious artists. I worked hard to be taken seriously and I was hesitant about collaborating with you even though your music is not necessarily what I should fear.”
Harry looks back at you with an unreadable expression and you feel like he is judging you for standing up for yourself. Your fight for yourself is often mistaken as “being a bitch” or “being too sensitive” and the amount of times you’ve been told to just chill is upsetting.
“Well, good thing then that I won’t write music about twerking,” he then finally speaks up, a smile breaking his blank expression.
“But you do write a lot about sex,” you point out with a smirk.
“That I do, but it doesn’t necessarily have to be sexist at the same time.”
“You’re right,” you nod smiling.
 The writing process turns out to be harder than you thought. You’re not specifically inspired and Harry is the person to just throw things around until he finds something he likes. The two of you put together is kind of chaotic as you try to come up with something useful.
Two hours later you have a raw version of a melody that could serve as a chorus, but nothing else, no full melody, no lyrics. And if you’re being honest, you don’t like that chorus that much either.
“It’ll be fun to just stand on stage for three minutes and do absolutely nothing, because we couldn’t write anything,” you groan, sliding lower in your seat, rubbing your face with your hands.
“It’s literally our first session and we have plenty of time, Y/N. Don’t stress about it.”
“I don’t know how to do that.”
“You don’t know how not to stress?”
“I literally haven’t had a stressfree day since about 2007, so no, I don’t know.”
“You can’t chill even when you smoke?” he asks and you give him a puzzled look. “What, you smoke, don’t you?”
“Cigarettes? I put it down in 2015.”
“No, I’m not talking about cigarettes,” Harry chuckles softly. “You don’t smoke weed?” You shyly shake your head. “Really? I would have sworn you’re the type to relax with a good joint. Want to try it?”
“What? Now?” you ask with wide eyes.
“Why not?” he shrugs and walks over to the little side table in the corner of the room and reaching into it he simply pulls a little plastic bag out with three joints in them.
“Are you just casually keeping joints around your house?”
“I don’t really smoke them, they make me feel sleepy. But some of my friends like it so I keep a few around,” he explains as he takes one out and puts the rest back. “You want to try?”
“I-I’m not sure… I have to drive back home.”
“You can stay for the night, I have three guest bedrooms,” he shrugs before his eyes meet yours. “Again, not trying to pressure you, I’m just offering.”
“Are you gonna smoke?”
“We can share one if you want. I would recommend smoking one by yourself for the first time.”
“Okay,” you nod shortly as you watch him tip-tap the joint a little, rolling it between his fingers before he takes it between his lips and reaches for a lighter. “Wait, shouldn’t we do it somewhere outside? The smoke is gonna get stuck in here.”
Harry stops, thinking about what you said and he nods. Grabbing the guitar he asks you to follow him and the two of you move up and out to the terrace, sinking into his lounge chairs. You bring your knees up to your chest, hugging them tightly as you watch Harry light the joint and take the first few puffs. As he exhales the smoke he holds the joint out for you and you take it, hesitantly putting it between your lips as you inhale for the first time. You can’t help but scowl at the taste, the whole act of smoking feeling strange after years of smoking your last cigarette. You keep it down a little before puffing the smoke out and passing the joint back to Harry.
You keep switching until you make it past half of it and you finally start to feel the effect of it. You feel light, like you’re floating in the pool that’s in front of you, you can almost feel the water touching your skin yet you’re still dry.
“How are you feeling?” Harry asks, blinking at you with hooded eyes.
“I’m feeling… fine,” you chuckle softly as you take the joint from him and drag from it again. “Do you do other drugs?”
“I’ve done shrooms a few times, not often though. I’m not trying to pick up an addiction,” he smiles softly, running a hand through his hair. “Have you done anything?”
“No,” you shake your head. “Didn’t have the money for it before and then didn’t have time later. But I never really felt the need either.”
“And you said you put down the cigarette as well?”
“Yeah. I knew I had to do that sooner or later, it was starting to change my voice and I couldn’t have that.”
“That’s what we always told Louis, that his voice will turn to shit if he keeps smoking,” Harry chuckles softly, dragging from the joint before he passes it over to you, not much left of it.
“Did he ever stop?”
“I think he put it down when his son was born, but I don’t know if he started again.”
You give the joint back for him to finish it and you watch him put it out in the ashtray before he sinks down in the lounge chair, closing his eye for a bit, breathing steadily. You find it amusing how you can still see the guy that handed you a check years ago at that bar, trying to make things right, but he also looks like a completely different person at the same time. He is more mature and open in his mindset and just the way he approaches things in general. The Harry you met seven years ago was still searching his way, but the version lying next to you now is a lot more confident in who he really is.
“Want to take a picture?” he hums keeping his eyes closed.
“What?”
His eyes peel open and turn to face you, a smug smirk on his lips.
“You’ve been staring at me. Take a picture, it lasts longer.”
“You are way too full of yourself,” you scoff and pushing yourself up from the lounge chair you walk over to the edge of the pool, mesmerized by the way the light is dancing on the surface.
You never really thought about what weed would feel like in your system, but it feels oddly tranquil and relaxing. In a way your body feels a little strange, like it’s not even yours, but you also sense everything very… loudly.
“You alright?” you hear Harry’s voice coming from behind, the tapping on his feet signaling that he is walking closer to you.
“Yeah,” you nod without taking your eyes off of the water.
“Do you want to go for a swim?”
“What?” you breathe out turning to face him.
“Do you want to go in?” he rephrases his question with a small smile.
“I don’t… have a bathing suit,” you answer and the moment the words leave your mouth they feel so ridiculous even when you were just stating the truth.
“Okay, but you are wearing underwear, aren’t you?” he smirks. “Or I’m completely fine if you want to go in naked,” he adds smugly.
“Shut up,” you chuckle. “Can you… maybe give me a pair of shorts? I’m fine without a bra when I come out but I would rather have my underwear on dry.”
“Sure,” he hums and turning around he jogs back into the house while you stay right there, staring at the water again.
With each passing moment you get calmer, the outside world and everything in life that’s not happening right in this moment eases into nothingness, your mind numbs in the best way possible.
When Harry returns he is wearing a pair of yellow swimming shorts, two towels are thrown over his shoulders and he has a pair of white shorts in his hands.
“This is the smallest thing I have, I think it’ll be fine,” he comments handing you the shorts.
“Thanks,” you nod before he shows you the way to the closest bathroom where you change out of your clothes leaving them in a neatly folded pile on the counter, you put on the shorts that are a little big on you, but once you’ve tied the strings it seems to be staying up steadily. Your simple black bra is not showing more than what a bikini top would, so you feel fine walking out in your attire.
Harry is sitting at the edge of the pool, his legs moving around in the water. His head lifts hearing your steps and he smiles at you, standing up when you arrive.
“Fits fine,” he nods, taking a look at the shorts.
“Yeah,” you chuckle.
Walking over to the steps you dip your feet in first, testing the temperature before you start going in further, Harry following you right behind. Just as you expected, the water feels smooth against your skin, warmly caressing and swallowing your body as you get in, the surface reaching your chest. You let your arms move around, feel how the water runs through your fingers, it’s amusing and you enjoy it probably more than you should. It’s just water, but right now it feels like a pile of clouds.
“I know I suggested to smoke and then swim, but please don’t drown into my pool, I won’t be able to talk myself out of that,” he chuckles, easing him into the water until it reaches his neck.
“My life is in your hands, Harry,” you smirk at him before you follow him and let the water swallow your whole body up to your neck.  “This feels so nice.”
“Yeah? You like it?” he smirks.
“Mm, like I’m… floating through space.”
“In a sense, you are floating in the water,” he chuckles. “You don’t feel sick, right?”
“No, I’m fine,” you smile at him shortly.
You move over to the edge of the pool, laying your arms to the side, holding yourself up so your legs could float in the water. You watch Harry dive under and swim across the pool, reaching the far end before he pushes himself over to you.
“When I went to see you perform there was a song I really liked, but I never found it anywhere later.”
“Which one?”
“The chorus went like… Crashing and crumbling, I’m fighting for my breath, Today won’t be the day I’m meeting death…”
You suck on your breath, surprised how well he remembered the lines even after so many years. He recalled them perfectly, even singing the melody a little with them.
“I never recorded it in studio,” you admit quietly.
“Why not?”
“Because it felt too emotional and I didn’t want it to be just out there.”
“What was the name of the song?”
“It’s called Till I Die. I wrote it when…” You take a deep breath, feeling heavy just by talking about it, but something is urging you to share it with him. “I left from home right after I graduated high school, broke contact with my parents completely and I had a few very rough years, trying to just… keep myself alive, I guess.”
“Can I ask why you left your parents?”
“We had very different visions of what I should become. And I didn’t intend to live the life they imagined for me. My parents are very… traditional, my career in their eyes is just some kind of circus when I’m the clown on the stage. They don’t take any of it seriously and they made it very clear at the beginning that they don’t want me to become a musician. I was supposed to become a surgeon, my dad is one and my mom is in criminal law, they both worked very hard to get to where they are, but they don’t think that’s exactly what I’m doing as well.”
The last person you shared it with was Taylor and though it feels odd to open up about these old wounds again, but having Harry as the one listening to you just feels right.
“You haven’t talked to them since you left?”
“No,” you shake your head.
“And they didn’t even try to contact you?”
“Well, I made sure they couldn't. Changed my number first thing I set my feet outside the house and I never left them any of my addresses. I know it sounds cruel, but I didn’t want to do anything with them after the shaming they put me through when I told them I don’t want to become their perfect little daughter. They told me that I could consider myself disowned from the family if I dare to even write a song.”
“Woah, that sounds really tough.”
“It was,” you nod. “I wasn’t asking them to support me in any other way apart from just being there for me. It’s not like I wanted to spend the money the put aside for my tuition to buy guitars and tour the country, I just wanted them to… accept who I am, but apparently, I asked for too much.”
You feel tears forming in your eyes, but you wipe them quickly. It’s been long since the last time you let the thought of your parents, you’ve been good at keeping these feelings bottled up and in the deepest end of your mind. It’s not like you’re going around and just share your trauma with anyone you meet, but it felt comfortable to share it with Harry.
“I’m sorry about that. Everyone should have a support, especially in our job.”
“I had… myself,” you chuckle bitterly. “Became pretty good at relying only on myself.”
“I’m guessing it’s another reason why you prefer working alone, right?” he smiles at you softly.
“You could say that,” you nod into the water.
“I know it’ll sound cheesy, but… if you ever want to talk, I’m here,” he offers.
“Oh, are we becoming friends?” you ask chuckling.
“We’ve known each other for long enough to be friends, am I right?” he smirks, splashing some water in your way.
“We met a long time ago, but that doesn’t mean we know each other. Everything I know about you is from articles and gossip sites and I think you can only say the same thing,” you point out.
“Okay, then let’s get to know each other.”
“What, do you want to play 21 questions now or something?” you huff.
“Damn right,” he smirks.
And that’s exactly what you do. Swimming around in the pool you ask each other questions, some are funny, some are more serious and you slowly start to get to know each other, seven years after meeting for the first time, but in a way it feels like it’s been just last week when you were talking in the alleyway.
The weed soon dies down in your system, leaving you incredibly tired and it’s only then you realize it’s already past one am. Pulling out of the pool, you both grab a towel drying yourselves up before making your way back into the house.
“The guest bedroom next to mine has a bathroom so I think that’s the best one. I can give you something to sleep in if you’d like,” Harry offers as you follow him down the hallway.
“I think I’m fine in my sweats, but thank you.” He shows you the room, tells you how to change the AC if you feel too cold or hot and then bidding goodbye he is about to go to his own room when you stop him.
“Thank you for… today. I know we didn’t get far with the song, but… I liked hanging out with you,” you admit with a shy smile, leaning against the doorframe.
“Don’t worry about the song, it’ll be fine. And I liked it too. We can make it a regular thing, if you want. You can come over, we’d chill and try to cook up something for the song.”
“I, uhh… Yeah, that sounds good,” you nod, he shoots you a smile before turning around and disappearing in his room.
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The morning doesn’t turn out at all any awkward, especially because you don’t get to stay around too long. You have a meeting at eleven so you have to leave in time to go home and get changed before that. Harry makes you coffee, which is lifesaving, the two of you sit at the terrace as you drink it and you arrange to meet in two days to try and have another, hopefully more successful session for the song.
You genuinely enjoyed your time with Harry and to think that you didn’t only smoked weed for the first time with him, but also opened up about your parents, you feel a kind of connection forming and you can only hope you’re not gonna regret it later.
You move on with work after leaving from Harry’s that morning, you have some fittings for upcoming photoshoots and an interview scheduled, so there’s not much time for you to sit around. Tonight you’re supposed to meet Harry again at his place for another session and you feel buzzed about it. You meet Taylor for lunch, sitting on the terrace of your usual place she is talking you through everything that’s coming up the next week, just like you always do so then you can put work aside and have a real chat.
“So how did the writing session go?” she asks, digging into her salad that she always asks with extra chicken.
“The writing? Not so well. But we had a good time,” you truthfully admit.
“Good, good! You’re finally making friends!” Taylor grins, satisfied with the news. You just roll your eyes at her, turning back to your food right when you notice that your phone has been blowing up with notifications.
Huffing you grab it from the table with the pure intention of muting it down completely, but then you see that several people have texted you the same link and it bugs your curiosity so you open one of the messages and tap on the link.
“You have got to be kidding me,” you groan, feeling your rage already pushing up your spine, clouding your vision in red.
“What?” Taylor snaps, reaching for her phone out of reflex.
“That fucking asshole dragged my name again!”
“Who? Jordan? That fucker never learns?” Taylor hisses, her thumbs vigorously typing on the screen immediately.
“Someone asked him about me on Twitter and he dared to call me a lying bitch! I can’t fucking believe this man!”
You and Jordan worked together on a project a while ago. You were supposed to write lyrics to a song he was composing and it was meant for an upcoming popular Netflix show, so the anticipation around the song was huge, especially when word got out that Ariana Grande might end up singing it. During your time working together he very blatantly tried to hit on you, which you politely shut down, because one, you didn’t intend to date someone you were working so close with and two, you just simply weren’t into him. However, he couldn’t take rejection the way a mature, almost thirty years old man should. It started off very subtly, but once you’ve had a chat with him to stop posting obnoxious and suggesting things about you on his social media, because it’s making it hard for you to be taken seriously as an artist and that people will just see you as another celeb which you don’t want to be, he just completely lost his shit. He called you different names on Twitter a few times, the worst were Feminist Nazi and a cock teasing slut, and he just somehow never fails to mention that you lied about your intentions with him, when you were clearer than daylight that you didn’t want a thing from him other than work.
When you realized he isn’t going to be stopping anytime soon, you took him to court, dragged his ass in front of the judge and won the case, which ended with him having to pay you thirty thousand dollars and he was ordered to clear all his platforms from your name for good. You really thought that taught him a lesson, especially because against your will, the case got some publicity and he ended up making headlines about the fault accusations he made about you, but it seems like he didn’t have enough.
You wouldn’t worry that much about his new tweet, knowing that he is the one lying, but the trials took a toll on you. It was at the beginning of the time when you were making yourself a name and even though you won, his accusations stung for some people and some even thought him to be the victim. You fell out of two brand deals and an important interview in the upcoming months which was a major setback and all for what? Because a man couldn’t accept rejection? The sad part is that if it would have happened the other way around, he wouldn’t have had to suffer any effect of it, people don’t tend to question a man’s words when he is showing this charming and nice persona to the public. If you accused him the same way you would have been dragged and titled as a sour crybaby and Jordan’s life would have carried on the same way.
The peaceful lunch soon falls through as Taylor turns on her beast mode to at least get the tweet down as soon as possible, already contacting the legal team you worked with before. It has to be against what you agreed on at the end of the trials, he can’t just go around and drag you again without any consequences.
In just about twenty minutes, the tweets disappear from Jordan’s feed, but you know it was already late the moment he posted it. If something gets out on the internet it never goes away, there are probably hundreds if not thousands of screenshots floating around that will preserve his words forever.
You part ways Taylor as he heads to an immediate meeting with the lawyers you worked together previously, she tells you to try not to worry about it, but you can’t just turn it off in you, that’s not how it works.
Making your way home you keep riling yourself up about it, thinking about what it’s gonna cause you this time, what opportunity is going to be taken because a man has called you a lying bitch, even after winning the previous trial against him that proves how big of an asshole he really is.
Changing into a casual attire you head to Harry’s place a little earlier, hoping it’s not a problem you get there an hour before you were supposed to. Arriving you’re a little taken aback seeing that there is another car parking on the driveway that’s not his and you immediately regret coming here, but before you could leave, the front door opens and Harry walks out. You couldn’t have left without noticing, the security system must have signaled your arrival when you punched the opening code in.
“Hey, everything alright?” he asks instead of questioning your early arrival.
“I uhh—I’m sorry for being early, I could go—“
“Don’t be silly, come on in!” he waves at you and you walk up the stairs. “Two friends are here but they were just about to leave soon,” he explains as you walk in.
“Sorry for crashing the party,” you let out a soft chuckle.
“The more the merrier,” he smiles. “You seem a little stressed, everything okay?”
“Yeah, I just… It’s nothing,” you shake your head.
“Oh my God, is that who I think it is?” you hear a woman’s voice from behind and turning around you see a smiley brunette walking towards you, a shy looking guy following behind her.
“Sarah, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is Sarah, my drummer, and that wanker over there is Mitch, my guitarist.”
“Nice to meet you.” Shaking hands with both of them you realize they look familiar from pictures you’ve seen from Harry’s tour.
“I saw that ugly tweet today, that guy needs to be kicked in the balls,” Sarah sighs with a sympathetic smile, Harry’s ears perking up.
“What tweet?” he asks, eyes switching between you and Sarah.
“Oh, just… Jordan Wells thinks it’s fine to drag people with absolutely no truth behind his words,” you answer with a tight-lipped smile.
“Jordan Wells? The name rings a bell,” Harry hums.
“He is a music producer,” Mitch chimes in.
“I think he was supposed to write for 1D one time, but the deal fell through. Guess we didn’t miss out on anything,” he jokes and it brings a genuine smile to your face.
“You surely didn’t,” you comment under your breath.
You chat with Sarah and Mitch for a bit before they decide to head out, but Sarah asks you to come around sometime they are hanging out and you gladly say yes, wanting to know her and Mitch better, they seem like great company and even greater musicians, it’s always good to meet people who are like you.
As Harry walks his friends out you make yourself comfortable on the couch, reading Taylor’s texts about the update on the recent actions, she has gotten in contact with Jordan’s team and legal steps will be taken if Jordan doesn’t show any sign of improvement in the very near future.
“Hey, want something to drink? Wine or beer maybe?” Harry walks in as you look up from your phone.
“Wine sounds fucking fantastic,” you breathe out earning a soft chuckle from him. You follow him into the kitchen and watch him get a bottle of white wine with two glasses. “I hope Sarah and Mitch didn’t leave early because of me.”
“Oh, not at all. They knew you’d be coming over and would have left around this time, so don’t worry about it.”
He joins you at the kitchen island with the two glasses handing you one and you take a sip from it with a satisfied hum.
“So, want to talk about this Jordan ordeal?”
“There’s not much to talk, really,” you shrug. “He is a jerk and I just can’t seem to get rid of him and I didn’t even date the guy…”
“What did he do this time?”
“Oh, he just casually called me a lying bitch on Twitter, so that’s fun,” you let out a fake laugh, raising your glass before taking a big swig from it.
“Not that creative, if you’re asking me,” he jokes making you laugh. “It’s a very plain choice of words.”
“Yeah, not as good as his best which was calling me a feminist nazi.”
Harry almost chokes on his wine as you say the words, coughing a little while you watch him with an entertained smirk.
“That’s… an interesting way to express his opinion about you,” he answers diplomatically.
“Right? I was thinking about getting a sign of it, like a Live, Love, Laugh one, in the middle of my living room.”
“Would be a wonderful touch of décor,” he smirks. “Alright, I have a proposal for today’s session.”
“Shoot it.”
“You seemed to enjoy your weed experience the last time, I thought we could give it a try again, but we would try to write this time as well.”
“You want to write while smoking?” you ask raising your eyebrows at him.
“Only if you want to. I just thought it would relax you a bit, might even come up with some interesting ideas for the song.”
“Are you trying to turn me into an addict?” you narrow your eyes at him and he just holds his hands up innocently.
“Told you, no pressure,” he smirks angelically.
“I feel like I’m not even coming here to work but to meet with my new dealer,” you chuckle making him laugh. “Okay, we can… give it a try.”
 An hour and one joint per person later the two of you are lounging in his living room, he is sprawled out on the loveseat with a guitar on his arms while you are curled upon the sectional, fumbling with the strings of your hoodie.
“We should just… fucking steal a song,” you snort, finding your comment hilarious.
“Which one were you thinking about?” Harry smirks your way, his fingers gently strumming some random melody on the instrument.
“I really want to have a Madonna song to be mine,” you sigh dreamily.
“You’re a fan?”
“Oh, I grew up on her. I have an elaborate choreography for Hung Up,” you snort.
“You need to perform it for me.”
“No fucking way,” you laugh shaking your head. “Not even weed can make me dance for you.”
“Come on, I need to see that choreography, you can’t just hint it and then never show it to me!”
“Nah, not happening,” you laugh, sliding lower down in your seat, your head resting against the armrest of the couch.
You listen to him play the same melody over and over again with your eyes closed and though you really like what you are hearing, no words are forming in your mind that could serve as lyrics. Your phone buzzes on the cushion next to you and grabbing it you see a text from Taylor.
Taylor: Lawyers are on the case, we’ll have more tomorrow, don’t stress about it too much. Night! Xx
Sighing you drop the device back next to you, covering your eyes with your arms.
“You alright?” Harry softly asks.
“Nah, I just want to… disappear,” you sigh, tired of this fight you’ve been fighting for way too long.
“Is this about Jordan? He is a fucking ass, most people know it.”
“But not everyone!” you snap throwing your hands up. “And that fraction that still believes that he is saying the truth is enough to ruin my life. I’m fucking fed up with the injustice women have to face because of the patriarchy we are forced to live in!” Pushing yourself up you run a hand through your hair, hugging your knees to your chest. “It’s so fucking upsetting, like everything I do goes straight down the drain because of one little thing and I’m stuck with trying to rebuild my whole future plan.”
From a sudden urge, you move down to the floor, lying down on the fluffy rug that runs under the couches and the glass coffee table. It feels nice, kind of grounding to lie flat on the floor, especially because your senses are all messed up again because of the weed, but in a good kind of way.
“You worry way too much on longterm things. Try to stay in the moment a little more,” Harry tells you, putting the guitar to the side so he can move his feet to the floor, leaning onto his knees. “You can’t control this much what happens in the future, you should only care about today. And today, you’ve done good, you made it through another day, you did what you had to do and that’s it. Stressing about tomorrow or the next week or next year is just way too much to deal with all the time, twenty-four-seven, three-six-five, that’s just no way to live.”
Lying on the floor you stare up at the ceiling seemingly blankly, but your mind starts to swirl over what he just told you. The worlds are running around, mixing and mingling until something starts to form, making you gasp.
“Grab the guitar,” you tell him, sitting up abruptly. He pulls his eyebrows together, but does as you told him to, holding the instrument on his lap as he waits for you to instruct him more. “Play that… that melody you’ve been playing, but a little faster.”
He turns his attention at the guitar, trying the strings out a few times, feeling the melody under his fingers before he starts playing it just how you asked as you slowly start to sing the lines you have just thought about.
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“You made it through… another day, you made it through another day… You did it, let’s celebrate…”
The lines fit perfectly with the melody he has come up with and the more you sing, the wider his smile grows as you move along in the forming song.
“Some days you feel you’ll break, but you made it through another day, yeah, you did it, let’s celebrate…”
“Don’t fucking stop!” he chimes in, never stopping the riffs, trying out new things as you go, slowly perfecting it together with the lyrics.
“Twenty-four-seven and three-six-five, you made another day, you made it alive! Made another day made it alive!” You sing loud and clear, completely lost in the melody Harry is playing, the lines just flowing out of you, like a dam has been taken down and now everything washes over you at once.
When the chorus is about to come up however you run out of ideas, your eyes meet Harry’s and he sees that you’re stuck. His eyebrows knit together, tongue runs along his lips before he starts playing the melody of the chorus and takes over the singing as well.
“So today, baby, remember it’s okay! We’re all floating through space, today, baby, remember you’re okay! We’re all floating through space…”
He plays a little with the lines, repeats them, tries a few times before he stops singing, you are now standing up, watching him end the melody, neither of you saying a word as he room grows silent. A sudden urge drives you to go closer and you sit back down to the floor in front of him, your eyes casting over the now silent instrument on his lap. Looking up your eyes meet his and you feel like the air is kicked out of your lungs.
You’ve heard so much about moments when you feel yourself pulling towards someone, when it’s like a magnetic field but you never actually experienced it until now. Staring back at Harry you feel that pull everyone has talked about and you finally understand what they were trying to say. It’s like there’s a string coming from your chest that’s connected to him and he is tugging it without even doing anything.
Reaching forward he tugs a loose strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers dancing down the side of your face as you catch his eyes wander down to your lips. Sucking on your breath you feel the moment, you know what he is thinking about because you think about the exact same thing. Kissing him. You are desperate to find out what his lips feel against yours, what he tastes like, what it’s like to have him so close to you.
“You want to kiss me,” you whisper and it’s not a question, more like an observation.
“I do,” he admits with a soft smile, but doesn’t move closer. “Can I?”
“I don’t think it’s an appropriate thing to do in our situation,” you breathe out, though you don’t agree with the statement fully.
“You think too much,” he chuckles softly, leaning closer just a tad bit, but there are still a few inches between the two of you. “Do you want to kiss me?”
“Yes,” you admit.
“Then we should just do what we want to,” he suggests with a small smirk and he looks ridiculously handsome with his dimples and shining green eyes that are glued to you.
“And then what? We’ll just go on like it never happened or there’s going to be more happening? How are we supposed to—“
You don’t get to finish, because Harry closes the distance between you and him and presses his lips against yours, swallowing the rest of your stammering speech. Whatever doubts and hesitation you felt just a moment ago, it all vanishes into nothing as you melt into his kiss, his lips caressing yours gently, softly capturing them, savoring and tasting you with caution, giving you the chance to pull back anytime, but nothing in your body can make you stop kissing him in this moment.
His palms cup your jaw as you push yourself up, slowly making your way to straddle his lap after he has blindly put the guitar to the side, hands coming to rest on his shoulder for leverage. His other hand grips your waist, pulling you close until your chest is pressed up against his, lips never disconnecting in the kiss.
Kissing him feels like second nature, like it’s not even the first but the hundredth time, but on the other hand, every touch and tiny sparkle is so new and unusual, you’ve never felt like this before.
Harry slowly pulls back, pecking your lips a few more times before he stops, nuzzling his nose against you in an adorable and innocent way that brings a smile to your lips.
“Doesn’t it feel good to just do whatever you feel like doing?” he asks with a soft smile, making you laugh.
“Kind of.”
“Nothing has to change. Or something can, it’s up to you.”
“You are so upsettingly cool and respectful,” you blurt out chuckling and it makes him laugh, his head falling back against the back of the couch.
“I’m sorry, I guess?” he smirks with a shrug.
“See? Respectful!” you grin, your hands moving up to cup his face. The pad of your thumbs gently tap against his dimples that are showing thanks to the wide smile on his lips right now. You can’t stop yourself from leaning down and kissing him again, even though your rational side is trying to make you stop. You just can’t, his lips are screaming to be kissed and who are you to deny that?
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You’ve been running errands all day. Following an early meeting you ran to your favorite vintage store to get another armchair for your living room. Then you went grocery shopping because your fridge has been ridiculously empty the past two days and later you had a quick fitting for a few outfits you are supposed to wear in the near future. You’ve ran into a few fans too, having small chit-chats with them, taking photos, so it’s been a busy day.
It’s been a week since you and Harry have kissed and despite your fears, it hasn’t been awkward at all. He didn’t bring it up, but you don’t feel like he is pretending it never happened, which is kind of a great balance. He is giving you just enough time and space to figure out what it really meant to you, because quite frankly, you have no idea.
Obviously, you find him attractive. You’d have to be completely blind to say that he is not handsome and just simply good to look at. You’re attracted to him and not just to his looks, but to his whole persona.
It’s just you’re not sure it’s a smart idea to start anything with the man you’re working with and though you know Harry is nothing like Jordan, part of you is still scared the whole thing will happen all over again if you get involved with another man from the industry.
Workwise, everything is going well. You’ve successfully finished the song you started that ominous evening and have started recording it in Harry’s home studio, working some more on the melody, bringing a lot more into it than just a single guitar. What more, you’ve been coming up with new ideas for other songs, lyrics popping up in either your or Harry’s head and you just keep sharing them with each other, saving them for later once the song for the Grammy’s is done.
Heading back to your place you get a call from Harry, his smiley face appearing on the screen of your face as you accept the call and his accent fills the car through the speakers that are connected to your phone through Bluetooth.
“Hey, hope I’m not calling in the middle of a meeting,” he greets you and you can tell he is smiling.
“No, I’m just on my way home. What’s up?”
“I’m meeting with Sarah and Mitch for dinner tonight, thought you’d like to join us.”
“I wouldn’t want to intrude on your time with your friends, I feel like you’ve been spending all your time with me.”
“But I like spending time with you,” he chuckles softly, a blush making its way to your cheeks at his words.
“Are you sure you want me there? What about Sarah and Mitch? I crashed your last meeting with them as well.”
“You didn’t crash anything, Y/N. And I’m positive I want you there, I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t. And just so you know, Sarah asked if you’d be joining us, so I assume they wouldn’t mind it either.”
“Oh, well, okay then. Send me the time and place.”
“Wonderful!” he beams, his enthusiasm making your chest warm.
By the time you arrive home he has already texted you the details and you have just one hour to spare before you have to head out. You opt for a quick shower and an outfit change, switching up your ripped mom jeans and simple t-shirt to one of your favorite jumpsuits. It’s a little baggy, but the waist is cinched in with an inbuilt corset, giving the whole fit a very interesting twist.
Arriving at the restaurant Harry has texted you the address of, the waiter escorts you to the terrace at the back that’s a lot more secluded and you feel yourself relaxing that you probably won’t get photographed. Harry is the only one who is already at the table, sitting with his eyes fixed on his phone, but he immediately puts it aside when he sees you approaching, a wide smile stretching across his face.
“Hey! You look amazing!” he greets you pulling you into a quick hug.
“Thank you,” you smile shyly. He is wearing a pair of brown slacks, a simple white shirt tucked into it, a knitted cardigan thrown on, a typical Harry outfit. “And thanks for the invite,” you add as you take the seat next to him, assuming Sarah and Mitch would like to sit next to each other.
“Don’t even mention it. We’re friends, it’s really nothing. I’m glad you could make it.”
The way he called you friends is giving you mixed feelings. Part of you is happily jumping up and down at the fact that he considers you as a friend, given how you don’t have many of those. It’s been hard opening up to anyone since you’ve made a name for yourself, you’ve ran into occasions a lot when people wanted more than just your friendship from you and it made you rather closed off when it comes to making friends.
On the other hand, you can’t help but feel a little disappointed. Is that all you are? Just friends? More importantly, is that all you want to be, or more?
Sarah and Mitch arrive soon after, joining you at the table and the waiter takes the orders before leaving the four of you alone. It seems like they genuinely like it that you’ve joined, so you can enjoy the evening a little more relieved.
Sipping on some amazing wine, you eat and talk and you feel like you’ve known these people your whole life. You especially like Sarah, she is so open-minded and funny and you think they make a great couple with Mitch who is obviously more closed off, but it’s obvious how much he worships his girlfriend.
Sometime in the evening, when you’ve already had two glasses of Chardonnay and you’re feeling a lot more relaxed and comfortable, you move closer to Harry without even noticing, leaning against him gently and his hand rests on your knee, giving it a soft squeeze under the table, making you want to move even closer to him to feel more of his touch, to get more of him.
Neither Sarah, nor Mitch questions the two of you being a little cozier and you’re thankful for the safe and stressfree environment they are providing, not making you overthink what you do, just letting you enjoy the moment.
At the end of the evening, you can’t shake the thought that you don’t want to say goodbye to Harry just yet. He pays for everyone’s dinner, leaving a generous tip for the waiter and you stay back at the table while Sarah runs out to the restroom and Mitch takes a quick call from his father, leaving you alone with Harry. His hand is still resting on your leg, a little farther up, but still in a very safe zone in the middle of your thigh.
Turning to face him your eyes meet his, his green irises glistening in the soft lighting and he looks so beautiful, you just want to kiss him again.
“Do you have plans after this?” you find yourself asking.
“Not that I know of.”
“Do you want to come over to my place?”
“That sounds like a nice plan,” he smiles at you warmly and you just know that if you weren’t out in the public, he would have leant in for a kiss and you wouldn’t have stopped him.
When Sarah and Mitch return all four of you head out and they don’t question when you follow Harry to his car. They say goodbye and Sarah makes you promise to join them some other time too and you happily say yes to the invitation.
Not much is being said on the way back to your place, he plays some music quietly as you navigate him through the streets.  
“Welcome to mi casa,” you smile as you key the two of you into your apartment you’ve been living in for the past few years.
It’s nothing luxurious, just a tad bit bigger than what one person would need as a home. You would have been fine living in your previous home you lived in before you’ve gained fame, but you needed a much bigger closet so you were forced to move. It’s a two bedroom apartment with one big bathroom, an open concept kitchen and a spacious living room. And of course, a closet as big as your bedroom. It’s the perfect size and you haven’t even thought about buying a bigger place just because you can, it would be a waste of money and space. The interior is very much vintage with all your mismatched furniture and colorful walls, but you think it’s quite cozy and just the ideal space for you.
“Would you like something to drink?” you ask, walking into the kitchen to get yourself some water.
“Some water would be great, thank you.”
Filling up two glasses you hand him one as you lean against the counter, silently eyeing each other. It should be clear to him that you had intentions with asking him to come over, especially after being your cozy with each other during dinner, but you’re a little lost in what you should or even want to do. You just know you want him close.
He drinks up his water, his eyes meeting your gaze as a small smirk tugs on his cherry lips.
“You want to kiss me,” he states, using the exact same words you used the night when you kissed for the first time.
“I do,” you nod, feeling a little breathless.
“Then do it,” he simply answers, making you smile.
“Cool and respectful, as always,” you grin at him as he moves closer, stopping just a few inches away from you, your feet almost touching. Reaching up his fingers gently caress the side of your face and you feel yourself already melting under his touch.
“You’re beautiful,” he murmurs, a shiver running down your spine at his words. You close your eyes for a moment, giving yourself the chance to pull out of it, but you realize you don’t want that, not even the tiniest bit. Opening your eyes they meet with his gaze before you move closer, closing the distance between you and him, lips meeting in a warm and chaste kiss.
Though it grows a little hungrier, you can tell he is still holding back a little, giving you the chance to stop whenever you want to, but you don’t intend to. Pushing yourself closer to him, your arms curl around his neck as his hands grip your waist, your tongue meeting his as you deepen the kiss and melt into his embrace.
Pulling back you grab his hand and head to the bedroom, going back to kissing him the moment you reach it. You easily slide his cardigan off his broad shoulders, pulling his t-shirt out of his pants before taking it completely off, throwing it somewhere to the side. You smirk against his lips, hands wandering down his naked chest and you can’t push down a moan as you feel the warmth of his chest muscles under your touch.
When you feel him try to blindly figure out how to get you out of your jumpsuit with not much luck and this clears your head for a moment to realize what is about to happen. Pulling back your gaze meets his and he stares back at you with caution, ready to stop whenever you tell him to, but that’s not what made you pull back.
“Harry, I…” “We don’t have to do anything,” he softly tells you, his fingers dancing down the side of your face until they reach your chin and he pulls you in for a delicate and slow kiss.
“I want to,” you whisper. “It’s just that… I want you to know that I’ve never… I’ve never been with a man before.”
Searching in his eyes you look for any sign of what’s going on in his head wishing you could just simply read his thoughts.
“You’ve never been with a man?” he asks, seemingly not as surprised as you expected him to be. You nod, licking your lips, waiting for any kind of reaction, a part of you expecting to be upset, though you know he has no right to be mad at you for any of it. “Do you want me to be the first man?” he then asks, with a loving and warm smile as his hand on your hip pulls you against him playfully.
“Yes.”
“Then help me get you out of this jumpsuit, because I can’t figure it out for my life,” he chuckles making you laugh too.
You show him where the corset opens and then get you out of it with joined forces, finally leaving you standing in just your underwear. Harry’s gaze runs down your body, a look of hunger and passion shining through his green irises as he pulls you close again, kissing you with a lot more vigor this time.
Soon enough, his slacks slip to the floor and you climb to your bed, Harry following closely, climbing on top of you before rejoining your lips. Your knees open up wide for him, allowing him to sink his hips between your thighs, his crotch meeting your heated center, a moan slipping out your lips when you feel his erection rubbing against you through the material of your underwear. He kisses his way down your jawline and neck, gently sucking on the soft skin, peppering kisses along your collarbones before he reaches your chest. He easily unclasps your bra and slips the straps down your arms before getting rid of the barrier that’s been keeping him away from your naked chest.
“Fuck, Y/N, you are so damn beautiful,” he breathes out shakily, before his lips wrap around your right nipple, his hand cupping your other breast. You keep whining and whimpering as you feel his tongue swirl around your nipple before his mouth moves over to the other breast, giving it just the same amount of attention.
He kisses down your stomach, glancing up at you as he hooks his fingers into the elastic of your panties silently asking for your permission to go further, still so respectfully looking out for you. As an answer, you lift your hips up so he can easily slide the material down your legs and throw it to the side.
“Oh fuck!” you moan when his tongue and lips press against your bud, playing with it oh so perfectly, making you shudder. If you didn’t think Harry was perfect, his tongue work is now surely making a statement on that.
With every lick, kiss and suck he pushes you closer to your release that’s nearing in a fast pace like never before. Reaching down you lace your fingers through his chocolate curls, tugging on the lightly, making him moan against your core. You’re not sure how long you’ll last, but you want to cum with him inside you, so you pull him up, lips meeting again as you still taste your own juice on him. It’s heavenly.
Without breaking the kiss you reach down and into his underwear, palming his fully hard cock, earning a satisfied growl when you wrap your hand around him. The feeling is quite unknown, you’ve only once had to face a penis before, it happened back in high school when you were still figuring out what sexuality meant to you. Gave a wobbly and quite short handjob to a guy from the grade above you, never even talked to him again. The experience left a major effect on you, never even got close to being intimate with a man, but being with Harry now is putting everything into a whole new light.
“Do you have a condom?” he mumbles against your lips, clearly just as excited to carry on as you are.
“Yeah,” you nod and let go of him, rolling to the edge of the bed so you can dig into the drawer of your nightstand, successfully finding the little silver packet. Tearing it open you hand it over to Harry and get back to your previous position as you watch him kneeling up, rolling the condom on carefully. Your lips part when your eyes fall on his cock, seeing now how big he really is. Harry catches your eyes and leaning down he kisses you softly.
“Tell me if it hurts and I’ll stop, okay?” he kindly tells you, but you smile at him coyly.
“You might be the first man I’m with, but your dick won’t be the first thing to be inside me,” you answer with a smug smirk and it brings an amused look to his face.
“You are so fucking hot,” he murmurs, pressing his lips against yours in a hard kiss as he settles himself back between your legs.
Though you really tried to sound confident the other moment, you still feel a little nervous about it and Harry senses it right away. Holding himself up on one arm he cups your face in his other, kissing you slowly, taking his time with his lips, as if he is trying to make you forget about everything else but his lips.
“Are you still sure about this?” he softly asks, looking for any sign of hesitation in your eyes, but there’s none.
“Yeah, I want this. I want you,” you nod and reaching down between your bodies, you take him in your hands again, positioning him to your center.
Harry captures your lips in another passionate kiss as he pushes into you slowly, filling you up inch by inch. You gasp at the sensation, feeling a little tight around him, but not in an uncomfortable way.
“You alright?” he asks once he is almost fully in.
“Yeah, go ahead,” you breathe out with a small nod. He pecks your lips and slowly pushes all the way in before he starts to move out and then slide in again, picking up a not too fast but still firm pace with his movements.
You gradually get used to the feeling of him sliding in and out of you, it’s surely a whole different experience than using a dildo or any kind of toy you are used to. The thought that it belongs to him is bringing you a sense of intimacy you haven’t felt in a long time.
Wrapping your arms around his shoulders you dig your fingers into his hot skin that’s coated with a thin layer of sweat as he keeps moving, slowly picking up his pace as you both get closer to the endgame.
“Harry, faster, please!” you plead, legs coming to wrap around his waist so he can thrust in deeper, making you go completely nuts from the way your orgasm is already forming in the pit of your tummy.
He obeys without a second thought, slamming into you faster and harder, making you continuously moan his name, the room is filled with moans and panting, the slapping noise of his hips meeting yours.
Harry buries his face into the crook of your neck, kissing and sucking on the soft skin, definitely leaving a mark, but you couldn’t care less. You just grab a handful of his hair, shutting your eyes closed as you feel yourself nearing the end.
“Harry, I’m gonna cum,” you pant, barely hanging on.
Instead of stretching it out and trying to play with you, Harry clearly wants you to combust. Reaching down between your bodies his index and middle fingers find your clit and he starts circling on it, adding that little extra you needed to fall over the edge.
Moaning and whimpering under his massive body, your orgasm washes over you in waves, bringing you such an intense satisfaction you’ve never felt before. He keeps up his thrusting and just a few moments later his movements fall out of his rhythm and mumbling your name over and over again, he gasps as he rides his high while you’re still trying to catch your breath following your own.
With a heaving chest Harry rolls off of you, gets rid of the condom and throws it to the small bin you keep next to your night stand and then lies flat beside you as you both just silently stare up at the ceiling, very much in the best kind of after sex haze.
“How are you feeling?” he then asks, rolling to his side, his hand coming to rest on your bare stomach. Turning your head to the side you crack a smile at him.
“I feel like I’ve just been properly fucked,” you bluntly answer, making him laugh wholeheartedly. Rolling to your side his arm falls to your waist as you scoot closer, your face only a few inches from his. He is so pretty up close, his features never fail to amuse you, hard to believe he is a real human, lying right next to you.
He closes his eyes a little, letting his head sink into the pillow as his fingers delicately dance up and down your side and back. You feel like you owe him to say something, dropping a major detail about yourself in a heated moment.
“I had two girlfriends,” you speak up, his eyes fluttering open to your words. “The first one was when I was eighteen, we dated for almost a year, then I briefly dated a guy, but it was barely just a month. And I had my second girlfriend when I was twenty. We were together for two years.”
“Are you still friends with them?”
“I still talk to the second one. Her name is Mila. We broke up because she moved to Spain for a job for a year and we didn’t want to do long-distance. Then we just… grew apart, but we still talk sometimes. She lives in Atlanta now, she has a girlfriend and she told me that she is planning to propose soon.”
A soft smile tugs on your lips as you talk about her. She was an important person in your life in a time that was truly challenging. Mila supported your dreams, she went to a lot of your concerts and she was the first one you called when you got your record deal even though you weren’t together anymore. She has seen you go from performing in dodgy bars to rocking the stage of arenas.
“Congrats to her,” Harry smiles through tired eyes. Reaching up he tucks your hair behind your ear before leaning closer he envelopes your lips in a soft kiss.
“We really shouldn’t have done this,” you hum, though you can’t wipe the satisfied smile off your lips.
“Why not?”
“Because we work together.”
“So what? We aren’t allowed to like each other?” he smirks cockily.
“You like me?”
“Thought I made that pretty clear,” he chuckles rubbing his eyes. “But yeah, I do like you, Y/N. A lot.”
“I… like you too,” you admit shyly. Leaning in he kisses you again before pulling you to his chest as he lies on his back.
“Can I stay the night or you want to throw me out?” he hums closing his eyes. Chuckling your snuggle to him, making yourself comfortable, enjoying the warmth of his body after so spending so many nights alone in this bed.
“You can stay, but you have to behave.”
“Oh I will behave my best, don’t worry.” A chuckle rumbles through his chest as you both fall silent and soon enough, drift off to sleep.
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You wake up tangled in the sheets, but no one else is lying in bed with you. Blinking the sleep out of your eyes you look around and though there’s no sign of Harry in the room you spot his clothes on the floor. That’s when you hear the pots and pans clinking somewhere outside and you smile to yourself. You pull a t-shirt on with a pair of clean panties before heading out, finding Harry in your kitchen, wearing your pink fluffy robe and nothing else as he is making what seems to be pancakes.
“I don’t remember hiring a chef,” you joke walking closer, sliding a hand down his back as you lean against the counter next to the stove.
“Good morning,” he smiles. “I really wanted for you to wake up but I was afraid my growling stomach might wake you up,” he chuckles as he flips the pancakes in the pan with the spatula.
“Found everything you needed?” you ask, walking over the fridge to grab the orange juice.
“Yeah, you have a neatly organized kitchen,” he hums. “Sorry for snooping around though.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Pouring the juice to two glasses you hand one to him which he thanks softly before placing the golden pancakes to the plate on the counter and pours another bunch into the pan.
Sipping on your juice you watch him move around, making breakfast in your robe and you can’t help but smile at the sight of this fine man in your kitchen. Harry catches you eyeing him and he cocks an eyebrow at you.
“What’s gotten you so smiley?” he asks, his voice still a little groggy and husky.
“I just… really want to kiss you,” you shrug placing the glass to the counter.
“I think we are over this whole asking for permission thing,” he smirks, stepping closer he leans down and kisses you gently, tasting like orange juice and something sweet, he has probably ate one of the pancakes. His hand that’s not holding the spatula finds your waist, the t-shirt bunches up on your side as he pulls you closer, deepening the kiss before you hear sizzling coming from the stove.
“Whoops, not trying to burn the place down,” he chuckles as he turns to the pan and flips the pancakes. You wrap your arms around his waist and kiss his jawline before stepping away from him to set the table for breakfast.
“Do you have any plans this weekend?” he asks over breakfast.
“I have a meeting with my label on Saturday, but nothing else.”
“I’m having a few friends over Saturday evening, kind of a late Grammy nomination celebration. Want to come over?”
“Yeah, that… sounds good,” you nod smiling.
“I was thinking that maybe you could spend the night and then we can finish recording on Sunday.”
“Alright, I’m in.”
Harry takes a quick shower after breakfast before heading out, promising to call you later and though it still feels a little odd that he says goodbye with a kiss, you very much like this new setup between the two of you.
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Friday evening Taylor is over at your place, she loves helping you sort out promo stuff you get sent all the time, especially because you let her take whatever you don’t want, half her closet was meant to be worn by you.
Sitting on the floor with boxes surrounding the both of you, you’re digging through them with a bottle of wine, some 90’s music playing in the background, it’s a nice and relaxing evening.
Your phone lights up with a text on the coffee table and you already know it’s from Harry. You haven’t stopped texting since he left from your place just a few days ago.
Harry: Do you think it’s a look for the Grammy’s?
He attached a photo of himself in all denim, looking very much like 2001 Justin Timberlake at the AMA.
Y/N: Should I match and pull a Britney?
Harry: Is that even a question?!
“Okay, who’s the girl?” Taylor asks, making you tear your eyes away from the phone’s screen.
“Huh?”
“Last time I saw you smiling like this at your phone you were talking to that girl you met at that award show. So who is it this time?”
“It’s… not a girl,” you admit, placing your phone back to the coffee table.
“Oh, did a guy finally manage to sweep you off your feet?” Taylor gives you an amused look, genuinely surprised to hear that this time it’s a guy that has you wrapped around his finger. “What is his name?”
“Harry,” you shortly answer and see her eyes widen.
“Wait, is it… Harry as in Harry Styles?”
“Yeah,” you admit with a soft chuckle.
“Oh my God, I knew I could feel some sexual tension between you two at Jeff’s office!”
“There wasn’t any, what are you talking about?”
“You didn’t see it because you were too busy trying to blow off the duet, but it was radiating from him.” She gives you a look, putting the sweater she’s been examining to the side. “So, how are things? Are you guys an item, or…?”
“We didn’t label anything, he just said he likes me and I like him too. And he… spent the night the other day.”
“Wait, what? Spent the night as in—“
“Yes, we had sex,” you confirm blushing.
“That’s like huge! The first man you’ve been with!”
“I know,” you chuckle.
“How was it?”
“Fucking amazing,” you truthfully admit with a sigh. “I didn’t think it could be this good with a guy. Maybe it’s just because it was with him.”
“He surely looks like a guy that takes good care of his girl. So what’s gonna happen? Are you guys together?”
“I don’t know. He doesn’t seem to care about names and labels, he just likes to do whatever he wants and if I’m being honest it’s kind of refreshing. We are just… enjoying whatever we have.”
“That sounds very liberal,” Taylor chuckles. “But I’m happy for you. You’ve been alone for way too long, I think he might do good to you.”
“I really hope,” you nod with a sigh.
“How is the song writing going?”
“We’re finishing up recording on Sunday. I’ll send it to you when it’s done and we can start all the paperwork and everything.”
“Amazing, you are doing great, Y/N, I’m proud of you,” she smiles and climbing over she wraps you in a tight hug.
“Thanks, Tay,” you smile at her. “Alright, now do you want these lace socks or should I burn them?” you ask holding up a whole pack of them, making her laugh.
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Harry said it’s just a chill get together, nothing fancy so you decide to wear a khaki maxi skirt with a shirt tucked into it that was a gift from a fan, your first album’s name embroidered to the front. It’s one of your favorite pieces and you like wearing things your fans make you, gives the whole fit a plus.
Arriving to Harry’s place you spot that there are a few cars already parking on the driveway. You leave your overnight bag in the trunk, grab the bottle of wine you’ve brought and head inside. Unlike every time you’ve been here, the silence is now switched up with soft music and chatters, quite a few people lingering around the house already.
Just as you walk farther inside, Harry appears on the stairs and his face lights up at the sight of you.
“Hey! Did you just arrive?” He jogs down the rest of the stairs and walking up to you he pulls you close for a quick kiss without hesitation.
“Yeah. I know you said not to bring anything, but I hate coming to parties empty handed,” you chuckle softly, holding the wine bottle up.
“Thanks. Have you eaten? Jeff is grilling outside, but help yourself with anything.”
“I’ll be fine, thanks.”
“Sarah and Mitch are already here, but come on, let me introduce you to a few people.”
Harry takes your hand, lacing your fingers together with his. He drops the wine off in the kitchen before joining all the other guests. It’s really not that many people, just about thirty of his close circle. Musicians, people he has worked with and stayed close with, people he has known for long. Everyone seems welcoming and open, many already know who you are and it’s always a good conversation start, so there are not many awkward silences, especially because Harry is always near you, making sure you feel comfortable around his friends and it means a lot to you.
“Hey, everything alright?” Harry asks, when he finds you in the kitchen, refilling your glass. He walks up to you, placing a hand to your waist as he kisses into your hair.
“Yeah, your friends are nice,” you smile at him.
“I know, that’s why they are my friends,” he smirks, so full of himself. “Want to hear something interesting?”
“Always.”
“I was talking to Adam and our song came up and then out of nowhere I referred to you as my girlfriend.”
Seemingly he is testing the waters, trying to see how you react to the title, even a little afraid of what you might say, but it doesn’t scare you.
“Yeah? That’s interesting indeed.”
“Are you okay with it? I wasn’t really thinking about it, just slipped out.”
“It’s fine,” you smile at him softly.
“You don’t have to call me your boyfriend, call me whatever you want. It’s just a habit of mine, I guess,” he explains, popping some nuts into his mouth from the little jar on the counter.
“Alright,” you nod. Harry stares back at you for a moment before a smile stretches across his face and leaning down he kisses you shortly before taking your hand and walking back to the living room with you.
The last guests leave around midnight. After bringing your bag up to his bedroom you start cleaning up while Harry walks out the last couple leaving. You start loading the washer and put away things you’ve cleaned before.
“Oh, thank you for cleaning, but you don’t have to. I can take care of it later.”
“It’s nothing, I want to make myself useful,” you chuckle softly as you start the washer. Harry comes up behind you, his arms wrapping around your waist as he kisses into your neck.
“I have other ideas for that,” he murmurs, his nose nudging the side of your face.
“Yeah? What kind of ideas?” you teasingly ask, closing your eyes when you feel his hand slide under the waist of your skirt, moving down your abdomen until it reaches your core.
“Fun kinds,” he chuckles lowly. His other hand turns your head so his lips could meet yours, you’re still pressed up against him, melting against his chest with your back just right, like you’re two puzzle pieces.
“Fuck,” you breathe out when his fingers wander into your underwear and they start doing their magic. “Harry!” you whine, reacting intensely to his actions.
“I fucking love hearing my name from your pretty mouth,” he growls, kissing you hard before his lips part from yours and he starts bunching up your skirt.
You don’t protest, in fact, you lean forward, grabbing onto the edge of the counter as he pulls down your panties and you hear the zipper of his pants. Glancing over your shoulders you see him pull out a condom from his pocket and you can’t push down a laughter.
“Did you keep that in your pocket all evening?”
“Wanted to be ready when I finally got you all for myself,” he smirks, pulling his cock out of his boxer briefs, rolling on the condom.
His hands come in contact with your hips and ass cheeks, giving them a light squeeze before you feel him lining himself up with you. His palm slides up your back as he pushes into you, both of you moaning at the fulfilling sensation.
“Fuck, baby, you feel so good,” he breathes out as he pushes all the way inside before starting to pull out.
“Go hard, Harry. Please!” you whimper as he starts thrusting into you. Harry lets out a growl and slams into you, making you gasp at the harshness of the movement, but that’s exactly what you wanted.
The kitchen is filled with the noises coming from the washer next to you and the slapping noise of Harry’s hips meeting your ass with every forceful thrust he makes. His ring clad fingers dig into your hips, probably already making them red, but you couldn’t care less. You hold onto the edge of the counter, but then you move one hand to cover his on you, needing to touch him in some kind of way.
Leaning forward Harry kisses your back between your shoulder blades through the thin material of your shirt and you moan his name when he hits the perfect spot inside you.
“Shit, Harry! I’m g-gonna cum!” you gasp, perking your ass up more so he can go as deep as possible.
“Let go for me, baby. Come on!”
“I want to cum with you.”
“Yeah? Then hold on for a little longer, I’m almost there.”
You try your best to keep everything inside you under control, your orgasm is really on the edge and you can only hope he is nearing his end too.
“Harry! Please!”
“Fuck, okay, okay, cum for me! Let me feel you!” he moans and his words bring you the release.
You clench around him, moaning and whimpering and it finally pushes you into his bliss too. His thrusts slow down but they are hard and go deep, helping you ride the last bits of your high.
He pulls out and gets rid of the condom before wrapping his arms around you, pulling you up from your position so he can kiss your lips.
“How about we take a shower while the washer finishes?” he suggests, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
“Mm, good idea.”
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Once the song is fully finished you submit it to your label after an agreement that it should come out through yours, but it wouldn’t be tied to your or Harry’s upcoming album. Everyone seems to love it, Taylor is over the moon when you show her the final version and Jeff is just as happy about it. Having only three more weeks left until the Grammy’s, you send them your request to perform the duet instead of the medley they asked. Their answer comes the next day and they are more than happy to have you premiere your new duet at the show. Everything seems to be on track.
Following a rehearsal for the Grammy performance, you’re staying over at Harry’s, just eating takeout and having a lazy evening after a whole day of working. You’ve put on a new Netflix movie, but every time you look at Harry you feel like his mind is somewhere far away.
“Want to share what’s on your mind?” you ask softly, not wanting to be pushy, you’re just trying to be there for him.
“I’ve just been thinking.”
“About what?” He looks up at you, clearly hesitant whether he should share it with you or not.
“About what you said about your parents.”
“Oh,” is all you can say. Pausing the movie you turn all your attention to him. “What about it?”
“I was just talking to my mom the other day, she is coming here for the Grammy’s and I thought about how you… won’t have your parents there with you.”
“There’s a reason for that.”
“Yeah, but then I thought about how you said you haven’t even let them contact you since then and that maybe they’ve changed their mind about the whole situation. You’ve clearly proved them wrong with building yourself a career, maybe they can now see that what they did was wrong.”
You remain silent, chewing on his words. You’ve been great at not thinking about your parents these past years, it feels weird to have a conversation about them out of nowhere. Harry takes your silence as a warning sign, though that’s not the case.
“You know what? I’m sorry for bringing it up. It’s not really my business, I shouldn’t have brought it up, sorry,” he shakes his head.
“What… would you do if you were in my place?”
Harry looks at you, surprised you are willing to continue the conversation. His hand finds your thigh and he gives it a gentle squeeze.
“I think it might worth a shot to just… contact them. See if they want to maybe get in touch again.”
“And what if they don’t?”
“Then… you know you made the right decision leaving. I know it’s scary, but I think you should take a chance.”
“I’ll… think about it,” you nod shortly.
“Take your time, do whatever you feel comfortable with.” He pulls you into his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of your head as you get comfortable in his embrace before starting the movie again.
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Two weeks before the show you are headed to a fitting with Harry, your matching sets are nearly done, but they needed you to try them on and make sure they fit just perfectly. True to your and Harry’s extravagant fashion, this performance won’t lack any over the top fits either. It was clear from the beginning that you would be matching, but you made it clear that you want to bring it to the level where you’d be wearing the exact same outfit, so now there are two sets of suits in the making, the pattern of the whole two piece is recalling a kind of space vibe, blues, purples and black meeting in the colors with hundreds of embroidered stars and planets littering the fabric with additional crystal stars to make it even more extra. It’s truly one of a kind, especially paired with the sheer, tulle shirt you both will be wearing underneath.
“We look fucking great, babe,” Harry smirks as the two of you stand next to each other, examining yourself in the floor-to-ceiling mirror on the small podium.
“We really do,” you smirk, satisfied with how the performance is coming together. It’s gonna be the perfect way to celebrate both your first Grammy nominations, a huge milestone in your and Harry’s career as well.
Grabbing his phone he quickly takes a picture in the mirror of the two of you, pulling you to his side as you smile into the camera through the mirror. Then you leave him alone on the podium as they are pinning his pants to make it the perfect size. Stepping to your bag you fish your phone out and reading just the first few words of Taylor’s last message she sent about ten minutes ago, you feel all blood rushing out of your face. Tapping on the notification you start reading.
Taylor: Please don’t lose your head, but we are dealing with this.
She attached several articles and you start digging through them.
“Is Harry Styles dating his new duet partner?”
“Harry Styles cozied up with Y/N Y/L/N at dinner with friends.”
“Can we expect some hot make out sessions at the Grammy’s from Harry and his new beau?”
And then there’s the absolute worst.
“Is Y/N Y/L/N going to take Harry Styles to court too?”
“Shit, shit, shit,” you mumble under your breath, vigorously typing back to Taylor to take them down. Two pictures have been leaked from the time you had dinner with Sarah and Mitch, it’s so odd because it’s been weeks since then, where were these pictures all along? Not that it matters, all you want is for them to be gone.
Against your better judgment, you go online and check your social media even though you know you shouldn’t snoop around now that it’s out there. No surprise, you and Harry are trending, but the reactions are very much mixed.
The impact of your case with Jordan is still major. It doesn’t matter that you won, people are still questioning whether he said the truth or not and now they are afraid you might drag Harry down just like you did with Jordan. That you are just trying to use his fame to get more attention and then ruin his career, making a victim out of yourself again, because apparently that’s what you’ve been doing.
You’re not only being dragged, but all of a sudden, nothing is about the music and the art you are making, people just want to know if you’re fucking Harry Styles or not. A lot of the times you’re not even named, only referred to Harry’s new lover or what’s worse, his hookup. You’ve lost all the credit you worked so hard for and for what? Because you dared to have dinner with a man?
“Baby, what’s wrong?” Harry asks walking up to you. Your eyes snap up at him and he immediately sees the shock and anger in them, setting panic in him as well. “What is it?”
“The fucking… pictures,” you hiss handing him your phone so he can see the articles for himself. He scrolls through them with furrowed eyebrows, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip before handing the phone back once he has gotten to the end of it.
“Let’s finish this up and head home, okay? We’ll figure it all out.” He presses a kiss to your forehead and you nod, trying your best to keep your anger at bay while the designers finish up on the outfits.
An hour later you walk into your place, talking on the phone with Taylor, discussing the situation though there’s not much you can do at this point. It’s all out, the pictures can’t be taken down. She suggests to just keep quiet for now, she’ll call Jeff to see what could be done as damage control.
Throwing your phone to the bed you feel your whole body shaking from the anger, it’s agonizing to know there’s nothing you can do to stop it.
“Hey, it’s gonna be fine. We’ll figure it out,” Harry speaks up, trying his best to calm you down, but it’s not really working this time.
“Stop saying it, you don’t know that for sure. I can’t believe this bullshit is happening all over again,” you breathe out shaking your head.
“Again?”
“Yes! I’m being fucking dragged for something I shouldn’t be.”
“People will always have controversial opinion on everything, you can’t get them all to like you.”
“It’s not about liking, Harry!” you snap. “I couldn’t give a damn about people liking me, but they discredit my work. Have you read those articles? I’m seen with a man and suddenly, I’m not even seen as an artist anymore. I’m not even my own person in some of them, just a girl who is linked to you. How is that fair?” “It’s not, but stressing yourself about it until you’re sick is not gonna help anything,” he retorts in a firm voice.
“So I should just sit around and so nothing while watching all my work go to shit?”
“Nothing is going to shit! This is how it goes, there’s always something people talk about but they will forget about it in a week. That doesn’t take anything away from what you’ve proved through your career.”
“Now that’s a lie. Because if they did forget about things in a week, they wouldn’t be bringing up the whole Jordan thing now. I dared to stand up for myself against a man and look where it took me to! I’m the drama queen, the lying bitch who likes to ruin men for apparently no reason and they see me as a threat when it comes to you too. People are talking about how I’ll take you to court as well, they think I’m just using you even though they know nothing about me! And the worst part is that it wouldn’t be like this if I weren’t a woman. Whatever happens, however we react to the situation, it will never have the same effect on your career than it will have on mine.”
“So what, you’ll just live your life without ever doing anything that’s gonna upset people? There will always be someone who’ll judge whatever you do, you can’t do anything about that and if you let them get to you now, they’ll know they can mess with you easily.”
“So I’m just supposed to ignore everything? And not do a single thing about it? It’s easy for you, you’ll walk away from this without a scratch on your name, because you are a white man who can do no wrong in the eyes of the world.”
“Okay, now you are being mean for no reason.”
“I’m telling you the truth,” you retort. “And you know what else is part of the truth? That I’m not even having it the worse. There are women who are even more targeted because of their religion, their skin color, their nationality or sexuality and people don’t even realize how hard it is for any of us. I’m sick of the injustice we have to live with just because of our gender!”
“I do acknowledge the problem on hand, I’m aware of it and I’m all for doing against it, but we are not gonna solve it instantly, it’s a long process. Sometimes we just have to pull back a little, be smart about things.”
“They will never stop about this,” you shake your head, stubbornly clinging onto your opinion. “I won’t be seen as a serious artist anymore, just some girl who was linked to you. It’s fucking done, over.”
“Y/N, what are you trying to say?” Harry asks with caution.
“Exactly what you are thinking about,” you reply with a bitter laugh. “I can’t be a respected artist if I’m with you.”
“That’s not true. It will die down, they will see that you are more than just who you’re dating and everything will be fine.”
“What’s not fair is that I have to work for it to be fine while you are still the same artist you were before it all blew up. Don’t you think it’s unfair?” you call him out and part of you knows you’re being mean and unnecessarily rude to him, but you just can’t control it any longer. You need to let it out and unfortunately, he is the one who is here to take the blame.
“It is, but what are you expecting me to do about it? Release a statement asking people to only talk about my dating life to make it equal? What can be done is that we try to fight this together, show them that you’re more than just a woman who is linked to a man in any kind of way.”
“Yeah, like realization is just gonna hit them,” you snap. “I’m at a turning point in my career, Harry. Whether I win a Grammy or not, this time is going to have an impact on my future. If I’m seen as just a girl linked to you, I’ll never make it. I’ll be forgotten and dragged again and I can kiss my career goodbye.”
You know you were way too harsh, but it’s what you think to be the truth. You didn’t fight your way to this point in life just to be seen as a man’s girlfriend rather than the artist you truly are. And right now, you can’t see yourself get out of this situation without letting go of Harry.
“Y/N, please don’t let this ruin what we have. We can get through this, you can’t let them control your life this much. Who are they to tell you what to do? That’s not the Y/N I know, come on!”
He tries to step closer, reaching out for you, but you take a step back, wanting to keep the distance between the two of you.
“I would prefer to be alone now,” you sternly say, folding your arms on your chest, closing yourself off from him as you don’t even look at him, because if you did, you know you would break.
“Y/N, please don’t do this, we—“
“Alone!” you snap, cutting him off.
He stares at you, hoping you might change your mind, but you’re quite set on this. He knows you well enough to know you won’t budge anytime soon. He lets out a shaky breath and slowly turning around, he heads towards the door as you’re already fighting your tears back. He stops right before he is about to walk out.
“I’m really sorry, Y/N,” he quietly says before walking out, the door shutting closed behind him.
The sobs start immediately and you fall to the ground, tears soaking your cheeks, already missing him more than anything in your life. You really thought it would be different this time, that things might get better, but you were naïve.
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The next two days go by in a blur. The whole fucking internet is filled with those damn pictures of you and Harry, nothing has been about any of your Grammy nominations or even about your music, you’ve officially became the woman Harry Styles is dating.
Harry was titled as a Grammy nominee in every goddamn writing that surfaced, he was completely credited for his work while you could be happy if your name was written correctly. With every new article, your faith in having the career you worked so hard for lessened until you felt hopeless. You’ve officially became a dumb celebrity, just a woman who was known to be dating a man in the industry.
On the evening of the second day you have enough. You just read yet another degrading piece of you that was clearly written by a man, they once again talked about your case with Jordan, joking about history repeating itself and you swear you could scream and throw a tantrum like a baby at how useless and helpless you feel.
You put your laptop to the side and reach for your phone, dialing Taylor’s number.
“Hey, how are you feeling?” she asks right away, knowing well how hard these past days have been. She came over the evening you sent Harry away and tried to comfort you, but nothing could help you that night.
“Hey, I want to ask you to do something and not try to talk me out of it.”
“Oh God…” she sighs, already knowing you’re about to do something stupid according to her.
“I don’t want to perform at the Grammy’s.”
“What? With all due respect, are you fucking stupid?”
“I’m not stupid. But I don’t want to do it.”
“Well, this has got to be the most ridiculous move you’ve ever tried to pull. Why do you want to throw such a huge thing away?”
“I can’t… sing that song with Harry. If I stand on the stage and sing with him… I just can’t do it, Tay.”
“Of course you can! Suck it up! I know you miss him and it fucking sucks what’s happening, but you have to do it!” she tries to convince you, but you’ve already made your mind up.
“No. I’m not doing it. Please let them know that it’s going to be just Harry performing.”
And with that, you end the call.
Taylor knows better than to try to fight you, she doesn’t call back though you know she wants to murder you right now probably, but she’ll come around, she always does. You make yourself a tea hoping to relax your nerves with it though you know nothing can help you now. You wish you had someone to rely on, someone you could talk to right now, but usually Taylor is that person to you and lately Harry has been your support, but you can’t call either of them. The rest of the people you consider friends… they are just not that close to you. You’re left alone, again.
As your gaze wanders over to your phone, a thought pops up in your mind that makes your hands sweat. You think back to the conversation you had with Harry about your parents and you can’t shake the urge off to finally make that call.
“Fuck it,” you breathe out and grab the device, opening up the contacts until you find what you’ve been looking for. Your thumb hovers above the call button for a while before you finally tap on it and start the call. It rings four times before a voice speaks up on the other end.
“Halo?”
“Hi mom,” you reply and hear a gasp from her at your voice.
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There’s less than a week left until the Grammy’s. For your own sake, you haven’t been online outside of answering work emails, you just can’t deal with the shit show your life has become on the internet.
You haven’t left your home unless you really needed to go somewhere, did most of your meetings over the phone or videochat and postponed a fitting as well. You’ve officially caved yourself up in your apartment and you are not planning on leaving anytime soon.
Taylor keys herself in, she hasn’t even mentioned that she might drop by, but you’re not surprised. She is probably here to try to bring you out of this pity party you’ve been holding for days. When she sees you lying on the couch in sweats and messy, unwashed hair, she sighs, shaking her head.
“You really need to pull your shit together, Y/N.”
“I’m fine,” you mumble, pulling your fuzzy blanket up to your chin.
“No, you’re not. This is not the bad bitch I know.”
“Bad bitches have bad days too.”
“This is not a bad day, you look like a fucking zombie. This is not what a Grammy nominee should look like days before the big show.”
“Doesn’t matter, it’s not like I’m performing or anything,” you shrug, but the look in Taylor’s eyes make yours go wide. “Taylor, I’m not performing, you informed them about it, right?”
“This is why I’m here,” she sighs walking closer, sitting on the other end of the couch. “I never cancelled on your performance.”
“I told you I’m not doing it!” “I know, but I was hoping you might come around. But you seem to be still acting like a stupid bitch, so that didn’t happen. However, I’ve gotten an interesting email today.”
She pulls out her phone and opens the email before handing it over to you. Shooting her an unhappy look you start reading.
-
Hi Taylor!
I got your email address from Jeff, wanted to write to you myself. I’ve officially pulled out of the Grammy performance so it’s going to be only Y/N in it. We are also working on a statement to release over the whole ordeal and my lawyers have been after the bigger gossip sites to get the articles down. I want Y/N to have the Grammy experience she deserves and I know it can’t happen with me in the performance. Tell her that I’m sorry for ruining it for her, she deserves so much more. I’m sorry she was brought into this.
I hope to see you soon, take care!
Harry
-
With parted lips, you look up at Taylor who is smiling softly at you.
“He… pulled out for me.”
“He did. Talked to Jeff on the phone, they have already let them know Harry wouldn’t be performing, they will make it official tomorrow.”
“But he deserves this just as much as I do. He is a nominee too.”
“Well, seems like he values you more than his own success.” Taylor lets out a long sigh and scooting closer she places a hand to your knee. “Look, I know you’re upset about how the media treats you just because you were seen out with Harry, and I know that you’re afraid of getting labeled as just the girl he dates and not get taken seriously as an artist, but you can’t let them stop you from living your life how you want to. There will always be judgment, there will always be men who are worse than trash and want to bring you down, but you are stronger than that. Pushing Harry away and being alone for the rest of your life is not a solution. What you can do to put them to their place is give them a big fuck you, date the hottest man in the industry and continue being the bad bitch that you are, fighting against the way you are being treated. Speak up, show them who they are dealing with, share your truth, like you always do! But you can do all of this with Harry by your side. You deserve to be happy and he makes you happy, don’t make yourself miserable because we live in a world where men are still placed above women. Fight for the change but don’t forget to think about yourself as well in the process.”
You feel the tears sting in your eyes. The weight of this past week is just way too heavy to carry, but Taylor is right and you are realizing that you’ve made it harder for yourself. The sobs come before you could stop yourself and Taylor pulls you into a hug.
“I know, I know. It fucking sucks, but you can’t let them win,” she soothes, running her hands up and down your back. “Show them how big of a bad bitch you are and get the man too.”
“You think Harry still wants to be with me?”
“I think that man would be on his knees for you in a heartbeat if you asked,” she chuckles pulling back. “Statement about the performance will be released tomorrow. That’s how long you have to figure it out,” she tells you with a knowing look before leaving you alone with your thoughts, however you don’t have to think long what you have to do.
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You have not been the only one these past days took a toll on. The fight the two of you had left Harry completely drained, angry and helpless. He hated that he was the reason you weren’t credited as the talented artist that you are and he couldn’t stop thinking about ways to make it better. That’s when he came up with the idea of pulling out of the performance.
Now he is ready to spend the remaining days until the award show hidden from the world, not even leaving the house. Everyone close to him knows he is better not to be disturbed now, so he is quite surprised when the security system lets him know that someone has arrived.
As you drive up to his house you spot him immediately, stepping out the front door with a shocked look on his face, probably expecting you to be the last person to be there at the moment. You wipe your sweaty palms against your thighs as you walk up to him, feeling anxious to see him and talk to him, especially after the last conversation you had.
“Hey, I’m sorry for coming here without calling or anything…” you shyly start, stopping in front of you.
“Don’t be silly. Come… Come on in,” he clears his throat inviting you inside.
You’ve walked through this front door so many times in the past almost two months, but this is the first time you feel so odd, standing out, like you have no place in here and it’s all thanks to yourself.
“Do you want something to drink? Are you hungry?” Harry walks past you but then turns to face you, talking to you with such warmth and kindness, even after how you acted, putting blame on him for something he has no control over. It completely breaks you and can’t stop your eyes from watering as you look at him. You really hoped you’ve run out of tears in the past days, but it seems like that’s not the case at all.
“Harry, I’m so sorry,” you breathe out shakily and you step closer to each other at the same time, he envelopes you in his strong arms and you fist his shirt at his chest. “I know it was none of your fault, I just got so desperate and afraid that it might ruin what I worked so hard for.”
“I know. And you were right about everything. Everything you said was true and I’m sorry you have to deal with it.”
“Yeah, but it wasn’t right to be mad at you just because you have different privileges, it’s not like you can change who you are. So I’m really sorry about that, and also for pushing you away when you were just trying to be there for me. I was so stupid,” you breathe out, wiping the tears sliding your cheeks down away.
“You just panicked, it’s okay. Don’t apologize for wanting to protect yourself.”
Resting your forehead against his shoulder you wait for your sobs to die down before you look back up at him. Reaching up he tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear, smiling down at you warmly and that smile alone ensures you that you are exactly where you are supposed to be, with the right person.
“Taylor showed me the email you sent her,” you bring it up, clearing your throat.
“You deserve it all to yourself so people can see how amazing of an artist you are.”
“I’m not doing it without you,” you shake your head stubbornly. “We wrote the song together and we’re gonna perform it together or else I’m not doing it either.”
“Y/N, you know if we step on that stage together they are gonna twist the whole thing and make it about something else. I want you to have this opportunity for your career without me ruining it with just my presence.”
“Fuck them, if they take it as something it’s not. They are not gonna take the chance away from us to perform our song. If they are such fucking dumbasses that they make it all about what’s between us, that’s their own personal problem. If I need to, I’ll go on a Twitter rant and tell them this myself. I want you on stage with me or else I’m not doing it either.”
Harry breathes out through his nose, pressing his lips together as he stares back at you, probably realizing you are dead serious about pulling out of the performance and he is right. He doesn’t even know you were the first one to cancel on it, you’d do it again without hesitation.
“I guess we are performing then,” he cracks a small smile and throwing your arms around his neck you pull him down, lips smashing against his, the kiss mingling with giggles and smiles.
Harry wraps his arms tight around your waist, pulling you up from the ground as he spins you around, making you squeal as you hold onto him.
“I have to call Jeff to call the Grammy’s not to post the statement,” he hums against your lips and he pecks them a few more times before letting go of you to quickly make a call to his manager.
You move over to the couch in his living room as he talks to Jeff, who is luckily very understanding about the sudden change. Hugging your knees to your chest you watch him pace the floor, exchanging a few more words with the man on the phone before ending the call, his gaze dropping to you again. Sitting beside you, he kisses your temple, dropping an arm around your shoulders as you lean against him, head resting on his chest.
“I called my mom,” you drop the bomb suddenly and you can feel him tense up for a moment, probably shocked by your words.
“You did?”
“Yeah.” Lifting your head your gaze meets his as you carry on. “She was… very shocked to hear my voice.”
“I bet,” he hums. “What did you talk about?”
“I just… asked how they are doing and told her that I’ve been thinking a lot about them. She sounded genuinely touched by it and said I’m always welcomed for dinner or lunch if I’d like to see them.”
“That’s amazing! See, I told you they would love to hear from you!”
“Yeah,” you smile at him softly. “I think I want to go over sometime after the Grammy’s.”
“I’m sure it’s going to go well.”
“Would you please come with me?”
Your question catches him off-guard he seems surprised that you would want him there, but then his expression softens as he leans down and kisses your forehead.
“I would love to, if you want me there.”
“I do,” you nod.
“Then it’s settled,” he smiles warmly as you lay your head back to his chest, his fingers gently dancing up and down your arm and for once in your life you finally feel settled, like everything is going to be fine.
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Highlights of the 63rd Annual Grammy Awards: Y/N Y/L/N blows up stage with new hit duet
The killer duo surprised us all with a brand new duet titled Floating Through Space, performed it together on their big night. Wearing matching galaxy themed suits, Y/L/N and Styles have closed off the evening with probably the most success, the latter winning two out of his three nominations, receiving the award for Best Music Video and Best Pop Vocal Album with his latest album, Fine Line, while Y/L/N was titled best new artist, becoming a Grammy winner early in her career.
Tabloids blew up earlier this month when the two singers were photographed cozied up at dinner with friends, speculations started about their possible romance, but Y/L/N has made a clear statement on the question with her red carpet appearance before the award show. Wearing a head to toe black Gucci gown paired with a dramatic cape, the message “I’M AN ARTIST, ASK ME ABOUT MY ART” painted onto it in red, making a bold statement about her opinion on the way the media has been treating the star.
Both singers remained silent on their alleged romance, but proved to be the best of their time with their joined performance with their new emotional duet. Following the song’s debut on stage it was released to the public as a single right away, taking over all charts with its overwhelming success.
Listen to Floating Through Space now on Spotify and Apple Music!
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Your knuckles are turning white from the tight grip on the steering wheel as you stare up at the home you grew up in. It looks almost the same, sometime through the years you haven’t been around your parents have painted it a light blue color from the paste yellow, but it’s still… the same.
“Hey.”
Turning to your right you look at Harry who is smiling at you warmly as his hand reaches over and squeezes your knee gently.
“It’s going to be fine. I’m sure they’ll be happy to see you, you’re still their daughter.”
“That’s not what they told me the last time I was here,” you whisper, feeling your throat closing up.
“We all say things in the heat of the moment. Seeing how happy they were about this lunch proves that they regret what happened.”
Nodding you take a deep breath to get ready for whatever is going to happen. Leaning over the console you pull Harry in for a kiss and it calms your nerves a little. Getting out of the car he takes your hand and squeezes it to let you know he’ll be right by your side all along. As you walk up to the front porch a sense of strong nostalgia washes over you.
You didn’t have a bad childhood, your parents provided you so much growing up, it’s sad to think what it has become. In a way you feel more anxious than walking the red carpet a week ago for the Grammys even though you’re just meeting your parents, but this is a turning point in your life that needed to come sooner or later.
“I’m right here, baby. It’s going to be fine,” Harry murmurs, kissing your forehead before you ring the doorbell, feeling weird that you come here as a guest, not as someone who belongs here.
You hear footsteps approaching on the other side, two frames appear through the clouded glass of the front door and then it flies open, pushing all air out of your lungs, clinging tightly onto Harry’s hand. There’s a moment of silence and just staring at each other before the tiniest smile tugs on your lips.
“Hi mom, hi dad.”
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Text
Part Fifteen. “eyes eyes eyes.”
word count: 5.9k (not including pictures) warnings: swearing
behind the screen (irl dream x f!reader) series masterlist ultimate masterlist 
A/N: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you know? anyway uh....... hope you like this... a lot is kinda going on in this part... but more details will come in the next chapter don’t worry i’m not scamming you 
_____
"I can't believe you," Dream scoffed from the other side of the phone, which was displaying only his eyes and up as Y/n's phone laid face up towards her ceiling. She didn't mind; he had pretty eyes and his blond hair poked out wildly beneath his hoodie and it was enough to make her only half focus on their conversation about her newest Minecraft build.
Y/n smiled as she glanced back at her phone to see him squinting at his screen in confusion even though there was no face on the other side, then looked back at her monitor. Neither of them were streaming but were bored so they decided to wander around on the SMP, continuing their all-day FaceTime call instead of transferring to Discord. They were on their fifth hour of FaceTiming at this point. Y/n had suggested multiple times switching to voice call instead since she wasn't showing her face, hoping he would say no so she could see him still, and each time he denied it because he claimed it felt more real when he could see her ceiling. Whatever that meant.
"I don't know what to tell you, bud. I'm just playing the game."
"But..." he pouted, she could tell by his voice... and by the eyes that were still glued to the call. "How are you so good?"
"Magic."
"I knew it."
She giggled and looked back to Minecraft, where she was looking at the massive hideout Sam had helped her build, complete with secret doors and tunnels and a whole lot of redstone. "Sam did most of it."
"Bullshit. Look at that," he said as he looked away from the phone and his green avatar punched the side of the build. "That has 'Bug' written all over it. You did that."
"Okay, I did do that part, but the cool parts like the secret doors and stuff are all Sam."
"Stop downplaying your skills. It looks good, Bug." His voice was clear and genuine and sent chills down her spine. For someone who want physically affectionate, she really wanted to give him a big hug. And... well... other things.
"Thanks, Dream," she whispered.
"You're welcome," he whispered back childishly.
"What in the..." Y/n said as she turned and saw a familiar Minecraft character with a white and red shirt in the distance. She pressed the zoom hotkey and stared at him as he filled her screen. "What is he doing?"
"Oh, speaking of Tommy," Dream started, clearing his throat as his avatar ran back and forth between the door of her hideout and a tree about ten blocks from it. "Um, I had an idea about, uh, the lake thing? The New Years' trip?"
"What's up?" she asked, turning to face him as she listened.
"Well, it's only about three weeks away and I was thinking—"
Dream was cut off as Tommy ran over to hit him with an axe a couple of times before running away.
"What the hell?" Dream grumbled as they watched Tommy sprint and jump in the direction he came from. The young boy paused when he realized neither of them were following, just looking in his direction.
<TommyInnit> did I scare you guys <TommyInnit> I did, didn't I <TommyInnit> I am very good at scaring people
Y/n laughed and typed her reply
<BugsyGames> not one single bone in my body was scared, tommyinnit <BugsyGames> try harder next time ig :/ <TommyInnit> JOIN VC RIGHT NOW <TommyInnit> VC <TommyInnit> VC <TommyInnit> VC <TommyInnit> VC <TommyInnit> VC
"Oh my gosh, he's so annoying," Dream mumbled with a small laugh but made no effort to do as the younger told.
<BugsyGames> idk if i really wanna HEAR you curse me out bc you already have over text multiple times <TommyInnit> VC <TommyInnit> VC
"Are you gonna join?" she asked, opening Discord on her other monitor.
"Hell no," Dream scoffed before his voice turned worrisome. "Are you?"
"Yeah, he's entertaining," she said. "And he won't leave us alone until one of us pays attention to him."
"Oh, you wanna be left alone with me, Bug?" he teased and she couldn't help but smile widely in embarrassment.
"Whatever you want to think I said, Dream." Y/n laughed, making Dream pout.
"Buuugg... just say you love me already," he whined jokingly.
Since she couldn't ignore the overwhelming butterflies in her stomach, she ignored him and opened Discord and looked at the voice channel Tommy was in. "Oh, Tubbo and Ranboo are there too, so it's worth getting cursed out," she told Dream before sliding on her headphones and joining. She moved one side off of her ear so she could still hear Dream over FaceTime if he spoke to her, seeing as he wasn't going to join the Discord call.
"Hi—"
"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?" Tommy started yelling quickly. "I'M NOT AFRAID TO FIGHT A GIRL, I HAVE FOUGHT MANY WOMEN AND HAVE WON EVERY TIME."
"Uh... geesh Tommy, no hello?" Y/n asked. "Why do you get in so many fights with women?"
"They question my manliness."
"Hm. Maybe work on making it less questionable?"
"EXCUSE ME?!"
"What is... happening?" Ranboo asked.
"I don't really know. Tommy came over and punched Dream and then made me join vc so he could yell at me, I guess."
"Oh, that's where he went!" Tubbo said. "I had no idea, he just disappeared."
"I HAD TO GO HIT DREAM BECAUSE HE'S TALKING TO A FEMALE AND I WANTED HIM TO LOOK BAD IN FRONT OF HER."
"What is he saying to you?" Dream asked from the phone on the desk. "He's yelling at you?"
"No, it's just Tommy being Tommy."
"W-What?" Tommy asked.
"I was talking to Dream," she explained.
"I can get on and tell him to stop if you need me to," Dream offered before his keyboard started clicking. "Should I? Do you want me to?"
"No, Dream, it's okay. I'll just fight him."
"YOU'RE WITH HIM??" Tommy accused.
"No! We're on FaceTime."
"YOU'RE FACETIMING HIM?"
"Yup," she stated before quickly changing the subject since Tommy and Ranboo were both streaming. "What are my sons up to?"
"We're just trident-ing around talking about whether or not my or Tommy's accent is worse," Tubbo said. "He says 'grass' weird."
"Tommy's," Y/n voted, wanting to piss off the youngest more. "You have the voice of an angel, Tub."
"Are we just going to ignore the fact that Bugsy and Dream are FaceTiming right now?" Tommy asked in a calmer, more mumbled but still frantic voice. "Cause, I mean, I just think it's a bit strange is all but if we're just going to breeze past it, I mean... you know? The two faceless Minecrafters are staring into each other's eyes while we all talk on Discord like nothing is happening."
"We aren't 'staring into each other's eyes'," Y/n corrected.
She paused when Dream giggled and said, "I bet you're staring into mine, Bug." She glanced down to see his full face beaming up at her with a playful smile. He had propped his phone up on his monitor so she could see where his elbows met his desk all the way to the top of his fluffy hair. Her cheeks and neck burned hot as she looked at the boy cuddled up in his hoodie once again. He folded his arms on his desk and placed his chin on his forearms, looking impossibly cuter as he stared at the camera. "There's no way for me to know you aren't."
"Shut up, Dream," she mumbled before speaking to the others again. "We're not even showing our faces," she lied. "Dream sorta is but not really."
"No need to lie to everyone," Dream said, still smiling, sitting up from his position. "This is my entire face. What, you don't want people to know you get to see me whenever you want? You have VIP access, baby, the people should know."
An abrupt laugh escaped her lips at the nickname. "Can you guys hear Dream?" Y/n asked the boys in the voice channel nervously.
"No, why? Is he telling you dirty things?" Tommy laughed evilly.
"Nope. Just wondering." Her face was on fire. She hit Dream's character in-game and watched him focus back on his computer with a goofy smile. He returned the favor by hitting her character back once even though she was continually dealing damage until he had half a and begged her to stop.
"He's probably flirting with her like he does when we're on call but, like, worse because no one else can hear him," Tubbo proposed before all three of the young boys gagged and yelled over each other.
"GROSS!!" Tommy shouted.
"Ew!! Mom, is there a dude flirting with you? That's disgusting," Ranboo gagged.
"I cannot stand you guys," Y/n laughed, making her voice as confident as possible so they couldn't detect her lies. "That's not what's happening."
"Do my words mean nothing, Bug?"
"Dude," she mumbled to Dream again. "I wish you could see how hard I'm glaring at you right now." He laughed in response.
A knock on Y/n's door snapped her out of her conversation and she quickly muted on Discord. "Come in!"
Naomi poked her head in and quickly put her hand up. "Oh, sorry!" she whisper-shouted. "I didn't know you were streaming."
Y/n shook her head and smiled. "I'm not. What's up?"
"TUBBO! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" Tommy screamed, making Y/n deafen also.
Naomi stood taller and dropped her hand to her side. "I'm just bored and want to do something."
"I do too, actually," Y/n admitted.
"You're bored?" Dream scoffed. "Bug, I'm offended!"
Y/n smiled widely and turned back to her phone to see the blond boy frowning. "I've talked to you all day. Can I not go hang out with my roommate?"
"No! Tell her to fuck off."
"Dream! She's literally right here, she can hear you!" Y/n covered her phone screen with her hand to hide Dream's face as Naomi walked closer, laughing.
"Naomi?" Dream asked.
"Yeah?"
"Fuck off."
Naomi laughed as Y/n gasped. "DREAM!" Y/n grabbed her phone and held it up to show one eye in the corner of the screen so he could see her glaring, but he wasn't looking.
"I'm just kidddinnnggg... obviouslyyy..." he dragged out. "Unless you do steal Bug away from me, in which case I'm not kidding."
Naomi was silent with her hand over her mouth, not wanting to freak out and make Y/n back out before Dream could see her eye. It was a small thing, but a huge deal.
The silence caused Dream to look down and his jaw dropped. "B-Bug!!"
"You see this?? I'm glaring at you. How dare you talk to Naomi that way," Y/n reprimanded teasingly, trying to hide the shakiness in her voice.
"WHAT? Is this how you felt when I showed my face just to prove a point?"
"Probably."
"You're doing the exact thing I did! You're just proving a point!"
"Yeah, but I'm not showing my whole face like you did, idiot. Just enough so you can see the glare."
"Oh my gosh. Okay, yeah, I see you glaring, stop glaring!" he giggled and Y/n's camera went back to only showing her ceiling as she smiled. "I'm sorry, Naomi!"
"You can't just joke like that to someone you hardly know," Y/n scolded as Naomi continued laughing. She knew Naomi had that kind of sense of humor, but Dream didn't.
"Who said I'm joking?" he asked.
"Oh, shut up. I can't stand you."
"I'm kidding! I'm sorry, Naomi. I was just kidding."
"I know," she reassured. "It's all good, don't worry. I know you love your Bug too much to hurt her friends."
Y/n saw Dream quickly pull his phone away from his face after he smiled shyly, and she liked to imagine that he was blushing at Naomi's accusation.
"Yeah, I guess she's nice to have around," he mumbled.
<Ranboo> bugsy? you still there?
"Wait, both of you quiet for a second," she told Dream and Naomi before unmuting and undeafening on Discord. "Yeah, sorry, what's up? I was defended and muted."
"You were so cryptically silent, it was a little scary."
"Sorry, my roommate is talking to me. I'm gonna head off, actually."
"Aw, but we hardly got to play with you!" Tubbo pouted.
"We'll play soon! I promise! But not you, Tommy. I don't like you."
"I DON'T LIKE YOU FIRST, YOU EVIL WOMAN."
"Bye, Tommy."
"Bye, Bugsy," he grumbled.
"Goodbye, mother," Ranboo said as Tubbo laughed out a, "Goodbye mom," making Y/n's heart shed a proud tear.
"Goodbye, my sons. Be good. Be safe."
"Bye!!"
She left the Discord and then left Minecraft. "Okay, sorry, continue," she promoted Naomi.
"I think it's so cute how you talk to Tubbo and Ranboo," Dream cut in. "It's adorable."
"It is," Naomi agreed. "Tommy, too. I know you pretend to hate him but we can tell you want him to be your son too."
"Never," she murmured, making both of them laugh. She slid off her headphones and grabbed her phone, careful to keep it pointed away from her face as she walked to her closet.
"Anyway, I just wanna do something. It's really nice out today, do you want to go to the park or ride bikes or something?"
"Yeah, sure." She ripped a hoodie off the hanger with one hand, making the hanger ricochet and clank against the closet ceiling.  
"Yeah, sounds fun," Dream agreed from between them.
Y/n laughed. "Sorry, bud, not you."
A deep frown etched onto Dream's face and Y/n laughed. "What are you going to do there that I can't join? You can just prop me up on a tree and sit next to the phone."
"If we ride bikes, I can't hold you. And if we go to the park we usually skate. Besides, we want to talk about how much we hate you anyway so we don't want you there."
"Bug!" he pouted. Dream paused before saying, "Can you give the phone to Naomi real quick?"
Y/n hesitated but handed the phone to her friend. She used her free hands to slip on the hoodie before tuning back into the conversation.
"You don't have to show me your face but I want you to look into my eyes and promise me something, Naomi," he said.
Naomi held the phone up to her face anyway and Y/n could see both of them looking at each other. "What's up?"
"Promise me you won't let Y/n fall and scrape her knee or something," he requested and Naomi laughed.
"I promise not to let your Bug get hurt." That was the second time Naomi referred to her as 'his Bug' and she was not opposed to the sound of it.
"Thank you very much."
"Great," Naomi said before her voice turned teasing. "Now that that's settled, Y/n, you're right he is cute!"
Naomi was a pot-stirrer. Always was, always would be. She knew what to say to make tension rise in the room whether it was between people who hated each other or people who secretly liked each other. Or whatever Dream and Y/n were.
While Y/n's face grew warm, Dream laughed.
"Hey, you're pretty cute too, Naomi. Should I tell George or does he already know?" Dream fired back, trying to embarrass her as much as she embarrassed Y/n.
Naomi's evil smile fell before a confident one took its place with a raise of her eyebrow. "Oh, he knows."
Y/n laughed abruptly and grabbed the phone back from her friend. "Okay, I'm hanging up now." Before I lose self-control and show you my whole face right here, right now, she thought to herself.
"Boooo," Dream whined. "Will you call me back later? Please?"
"Maybe," she teased. "Depends on if I'm clumsy enough to fall and break everything like you think I will."
"I don't think that. I just want you to be safe."
He needed to stop being so sweet. "Don't worry, I'll be fine. I'm a pro."
"I believe it. Still, though."
"I'll be safe. I promise."
"Also, Bug, um..." he paused shyly. "You have really pretty eyes. Just... thought I'd tell you."
Heat rose to her face again and the look on Naomi's face said she could tell.
"Thanks, Dream."
Naomi nodded her head towards her Y/n's door. "I'll be in my room," she whispered and Y/n nodded.
"Sorry," Y/n said to Dream with a short laugh. "I don't know why I did that."
"It's okay," he reassured. "I appreciate it. I know it was just a small part of your face but it still means a lot to me that you showed me because I know you haven't shown anyone."
"I want to," she blurted out. "I really, really do."
"Want to what?"
"Show people my face." She squeezed her eyes shut and walked to her bed, setting the phone face up towards the ceiling. "Specifically you."
He paused. "Then... why don't you? I'm not pressuring you, I just don't understand. If you want to, then what's stopping you?"
"It's not that simple, Dream," she responded softly. "I'm scared."
Dream was silent for a few moments. "That's kinda what I wanted to talk about earlier before Tommy came in."
"Really?" she perked up. What was he going to say? That she seemed too scared so he didn't what her to go on the trip?
"Yeah, uh, I know you're nervous about meeting everyone and Sapnap and I were talking and– well, okay, so I assume you, Karl, and Naomi are going to go to Georgia together?"
"Yeah?"
"Well, so, yeah, what if– only if you want, obviously, but, you guys could come down to Florida and hang out with us for a few days and then, like, the five of us could go up to Georgia together? That way you meet two people first instead of everyone at once. So, like, since you haven't shown anyone, it'll be like dipping your toe in the water and if you meet Sapnap and I and absolutely hate it you can go back home before meeting everyone else." He finally concluded his proposition and Y/n's heart was so warmed. He was so sweet it was killing her.
"I'll still pay for all the travel stuff for you guys to fly down here," he added with a shy mumble at her silence, "and it's only a four and a half hour drive from here so Sapnap and I were just going to drive up and we could just rent a bigger car to fit comfortably. But obviously you can say no. Just a thought we had."
"Dream," Y/n started softly, her voice coming out way more fondly than she intended but she did nothing to fix it.
"Yeah?"
"You're the sweetest damn person I've ever met in my entire life."
"I just want you to be comfortable," he said softly.
"I think..." she paused. "I think that would be fun. I'd like that. I'll see what Naomi and Karl think."
His voice perked up slightly. "Really? Awesome. You guys can come down whenever. We're going to leave on the 26th to get there that night but whenever you guys want to come, you can. You could even spend Christmas with us if you want to come a few days earlier. Might be hard to find tickets this late since it's the holidays but I can see what I can find."
"That would be cool! The three of us were just going to hang out together so we don't really have plans for Christmas. I'll ask them but I think they'll like that too."
"Cool," he breathed. "If you want to say no later, you can."
"I don't want to say no, Dream."
He paused and his next word had his smile laced clearly through them. "Okay."
"Thank you–thank you for thinking of me," Y/n fumbled out. "It means a lot to me."
"Eh, it might be a little selfish of me, too. I just want to spend as much time with you as I can."
She beamed and bit her lip to not laugh with pure joy. "I'm probably selfish too because I'm going to make Karl and Naomi agree even if they don't want to go."
"I have no problem if you need to use physical force," he joked.
Y/n laughed and shook her head. "I should go save Naomi from her boredom."
"Okaaayyy..." he sighed. "If you must. Thanks for talking with me today."
"I had fun! I'm surprised you didn't bore me to death," she teased and he scoffed.
"Well apparently I did since you're ditching me!"
"Nooo, you could never bore me."
"Hmm... sure."
"Dream," Y/n dragged out and he laughed. "You're so clingy."
"Ugh, I know," he joked. "It's almost like I like you or something."
Y/n froze before mentally scolding herself. He was obviously joking, but it still made her heart skip some beats.
"Almost," she mumbled. "Alright, I'm going to go. I'll call you later if you're free and want to hang out on call more or something."
"Yeah, I'd like that," he said. "Have fun with Naomi! And don't get hurt."
She laughed. "I won't get hurt. Bye, Dream."
"Bye bye, Bug."
Y/n finally hung up and threw her phone on her bed with a small external scream. Naomi came back into the room a few moments later with a smirk on her face and leaned against the doorframe. "Done with the call?"
"Naomi..." she said dreamily. "He's... too freaking cute."
Naomi laughed. "Come on, lover girl, you can tell me all about it while we go outside. Bikes or skating?"
"I haven't gone biking in a while, let's do that."
"Perfect, I found a new trail recently I've wanted to try out," Naomi said as she grabbed her keys off the front table. "Let's go."
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"OH, and then," Y/n recounted her story with Dream in detail (per Naomi's request) and she swerved on her bike a little in excitement."Then he said, 'it's almost like I like you or something'! What does that mean??"
Naomi laughed brightly and looked over her shoulder at Y/n. "Maybe it means that he likes you."
Y/n scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right. Don't get my hopes up."
"I mean it, Y/n. I know you think it's not possible, but just think about it. Do you really think you didn't like him until you saw him?"
Y/n looked up into the treetops that provided shade on their trail. She dreaded that question. She had thought about it so many times, tossing and turning countless nights asking herself the same question over and over. When did she start liking Dream? She had always had interest in him but when did her starstruck admiration and wanting to be his friend turn into wanting to hold his hand and kiss him good morning? When did that change happen? Could it have happened before she knew what he looked like? It would go against so much that she believed, so much she had been told, but... maybe it was true?
"I don't know," Y/n admitted softly. "I really don't know."
Naomi's heart broke for her friend, knowing her internal battle was killing her slowly. "Hey," Naomi said in a lighter tone than she felt. "It'll all work out. I promise."
"What if it doesn't? What if he really doesn't like me and won't ever like me?"
Naomi shrugged. "Then... then he missed out and someone better will eventually come along."
Y/n nodded, wanting to talk about something a little happier. "So... I showed him my eye."
"You did," Naomi said cautiously. "I wasn't going to bring it up, but, damn dude. How do you feel?"
"Good. Great. I know it's small and insignificant but it doesn't feel that way."
"I don't think it's insignificant. It definitely shows you trust him a lot."
"He said I have pretty eyes," Y/n whispered excitedly, making Naomi laugh.
"You do! You really do."
"Speaking of thinking things are pretty, George knows?? What does that mean? Have you guys video called or what? I've been so stuck in my pity party that I have no idea what's going on with that!"
Naomi turned pink but her confident smile never faded. She slowed down and Y/n followed suit, both taking drinks from their water. "Can we sit for a minute?" Naomi asked as she nodded towards a large tree trunk. Y/n nodded and they sat down together, bikes haphazardly thrown to the side of the trail.
"So?"
"So," Naomi started. "George."
"George," Y/n prompted. "What's going on?"
"I like him a lot. And... he told me he likes me."
Y/n raised her eyebrows and beamed at her friend. "Really? Naomi, that's great! That's so awesome, I'm so happy for you!"
Naomi let out a small squeal before blushing. "I know. We're both a little worried because of long-distance but we decided to not think about it until after the trip. Then we'll work out how often we want to see each other and stuff."
"Wait, so, are you guys, like, dating?"
Naomi hummed. "No? But I have joked about how I'm going to kiss him as soon as I see him and it always makes him turn bright red and he just laughs and is like, 'you're an idiot', so that's a good sign."
Y/n laughed. "Yeah, sounds like George."
"Sorry I haven't told you sooner. I just feel like since you're so confused about everything with Dream that it would be like I'm bragging or something? And I didn't want to make you sad that I'm talking to this boy so much and—"
"Naomi," Y/n smiled and grabbed her arm. "It's okay. I'm not upset by it. I'm so so happy for you, really."
Naomi let out a breath of relief. "Thanks, Y/n. You're a really good friend."
"You make it easy to be a good friend to you," she said with a smile and a scrunched nose. "You're the best. I love you."
"I love you too," Naomi giggled and threw her arms around Y/n, forcing a hug even if she didn't want it. Y/n accepted it anyway, hugging her friend back tightly.
"Alright, break's over. Let's finish this thing. How much more do we have to go?"
Naomi checked the map on her phone. "About a mile. Think you can manage not falling off for another mile?"
"What?"
"I promised Dream I wouldn't let you get hurt."
Y/n rolled her eyes fondly. "He's so stupid."
"Maybe, but you like it."
"Who on Earth knows why? Oh! That reminds me," Y/n said as she got back on her bike and rode slowly next to Naomi. "I forgot to mention a huge detail."
"Ugh, you never stop talking about him," Naomi teased. "Just kidding, what happened? I want to know everything."
"This involves you and Karl. How do you feel about taking a detour to Florida before the trip?"
______
When Y/n got home, she showered while Naomi made them dinner. "Today was fun," she said as she sat down at the kitchen table. "We need to hang out more, just the two of us. Thank you so much," she added as Naomi handed her a plate off food.
Naomi nodded. "Agreed. But when do we ever have time when you aren't streaming and I'm not doing school or working?"
"Hmm, true. For a job with a flexible schedule, I don't feel very flexible. Maybe I should promise to join less streams."
"But then I can't join streams," Naomi joked with a laugh.
"Just ask George. I'm not your closest streamer friend anymore apparently," she fake pouted and Naomi blushed.
"He wants me to join one of his streams except neither of us want anyone to know so he thinks it'll be suspicious if it's just him and I."
'Wait, no one else knows you two have been talking?"
"Well, Dream does based on his joke earlier but you're the only person that either of us have told that we're, like, actually talking."
"Oh, I feel so special!"
Naomi laughed. "Good. You are."
Y/n smiled and looked down as her phone vibrated on the table.
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"Boyfriend calling?" Naomi teased with one eyebrow quirked.
Y/n stuck her tongue out. "Wouldn't you like that?"
"I would like that. Date him."
"Oh, shut up," Y/n said with a laugh. "But actually, Dream invited me to get back on and hang out."
"So I was right?"
"No."
"Well, go ahead, I won't stop you."
"Thanks, Naomi. I had fun today, thanks for forcing me out of my room and for dinner."
"Anytime dude," she giggled. "Put that sponge down, I'll clean up."
"But you made dinner. Let me help."
"No! Go, your boyfriend is waiting for you. I got it."
Y/n ignored her and started cleaning dishes and putting them in the dishwasher.
"You're the worst. Love you."
"Love you!" Y/n called back as she walked to her room. She got on her desktop and opened Discord while she waited for Minecraft to load.
"Who just joined?" Tubbo asked in a tired voice. "Oh, Bugsy, hello again!"
"Hi!" she greeted back. "How's everyone doing?"
"Good, good, good. How was your, uh, thing? Bikes... or something?" Ranboo asked.
"Yeah, I went on a bike ride with my roommate. It was fun! The weather was super good today so it was good."
"Is it the roommate who's coming on the trip with us?" Tubbo asked.
"Yup," she replied. Ranboo fake whined and Y/n's heart hurt a little. "Ranboo I wish you could come."
"Me too. It would be fun but also very scary," he chuckled and Y/n nodded. "But I'm busy anyway."
"I'm terrified," she admitted. "So I fully understand."
"It's going to be good, Bug," Dream reassured softly, sending butterflies to her stomach. "I promise."
"Why are you terrified?" Tubbo asked.
"Um... just... you know... showing my face to everyone," she said with a small laugh. "Kinda weird." Though, admittedly, she was much less nervous than a few hours ago before she showed Dream her eye.
"Well, Dream has seen you, hasn't he?" Ranboo asked.
"No, what makes you think that?"
"He hasn't?" Tubbo spoke up. "I'm shocked! I could have sworn he had."
"What, why? Dream asked.
"You guys are just super close so I guess we assumed," Tubbo explained.
"No, we are close, Bug is just a tease," Dream joked and Y/n scoffed.
"Oh, whatever. You've seen more than anyone else."
"What?" Ranboo asked with a slight panic in his voice. "What, uh, what does that mean? Oh gosh."
"She showed me her eye today!" Dream announced like it was a huge deal. Which, it kinda was. "But she's a tease because that's all she showed."
"Why do you want to see her so bad, huh Dream?" Ranboo teased. "Hmm???"
"So I can call her pretty without her yelling at me that I can't know," Dream stated bluntly.
Y/n buried her face in her hands, the Minecraft welcome screen long forgotten, and laughed. "I cannot stand you, Dream."
"Awe!!" Tubbo cooed. "Bugsy, give the poor man a break, why don't you show him?"
When she normally would have taken that sort of comment to heart and would have beaten herself up about not showing him, she lifted her head to look at her screen. 'Give the poor man a break'.
"No, Tubbo, she doesn't owe me anything," Dream said with a nervous laugh. "Don't pressure her!!"
"I'm not! I'm not pressuring her to do anything!" Tubbo defended. "I was just joking! But it would be so easy to just send a picture of your face."
"But she doesn't want to and I respect that. Ranboo, are you still on the SMP? Where are you?"
Y/n tuned out the conversation, which had quickly changed topics, scrolling right to the picture she found the other day of her sitting on her bed. She didn't think twice. It just felt right.
Sent
"So, the next manhunt is going to have five hunters or what? Like what's changing?" Ranboo asked. "I think it's super cool that you're continuing the series."
"Yeah," Dream started to explain. "I'm trying to see who would be the best to have as the fifth person to make it—"
Y/n's heart pounded in her ears as she listened to the new silence, waiting for some verbal indication from Dream that everything was okay. That he saw the picture and that everything was still okay.
But he was dead silent.
"Dream?" Ranboo laughed. "Uhhhhh...."
"Uh.." Tubbo laughed too. "Did he break? Dream?"
Y/n bit down on her hoodie sleeve in anticipation and excitement, surprised that there were butterflies in her chest instead of raging thunderstorms of fear.
A loud sound banged through her headphones and her eyes darted to the Discord to see it came from Dream's mic. "Dream?" she asked softly. Did this man just knock something off of his desk?
His regard for them being on call with others completely evaporated. "Holy shit, Bug," he breathed out. "I-Is that you?"
"Sure is," she hummed.
"What the hell?!" he shouted, joy and surprise laced in his voice.
"Wait, what happened?" Tubbo asked before sounding excited. "Did you actually send him a picture of yourself?"
"Mhm," she hummed. "Maybe."
"AHHA! YOU BROKE HIM!" Tubbo laughed.
"Error: Dream.exe broke," Ranboo teased. "Man's files broke at the sight of Bugsy Games. Headlines tomorrow: Bugsy Games murders DreamWasTaken with a selfie."
"Oh, shut up," she breathed.
"Text me back right now," Dream demanded.
Y/n giggled as the other two teased Dream but she picked up her phone and found his one-word response.
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Seconds later, Dream's voice was back in her ears. "Uh... I'm gonna get off. I have a lot to process."
Tubbo and Ranboo laughed loudly. "A lot to process?? HAHAHA! Just say you're in love with her and move on."
"WhaaAATT?" Dream yelled. "I-I'm not in love with her, what the hell is wrong with you, Tubbo?"
Y/n laughed, agreeing with him even though it kinda hurt. He didn't have to sound too shocked at the accusation.
"Have fun processing," Ranboo said. "Are you staying Bugsy?"
"Nah, I'm gonna get off too. I'm pretty tired."
"Are you going to be in Big Q's stream tomorrow though?"
She hummed. "I don't know. I didn't know he was streaming tomorrow."
"Oh, I thought he invited you?"
"Guess not. He just lost points."
Dream laughed. "Good."
"Well... we should stream together soon," Ranboo said. "I think that would be really cool."
"I do too! We definitely should. If you have any ideas or anything let me know, okay?"
"Yeah, I will!" he promised. "Talk to you later."
"Bye guys," she said before disconnecting. She noticed Dream linger in the call for a little bit even though he said he was leaving and she decided to get ready for bed, turning off her computer and walking to her closet. She was stopped by some texts though. Priorities.
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uwuwriting · 4 years
Text
Kids getting their quirks w/ Todoroki, Deku and Bakugou
Request: *cracks knuckles* uH may i pls have a headcanon for half half bastard, deku, and king explosive murder when their child’s quirk manifests? have a great day (or night lol) iajsmsjsnsk :D 💕- anonymous 
Okay my baby fever isn’t over but now I know the main factor. Apart from my new obsession with dad Nanami, my period is also here so yay. I’m in pain. SO let’s feed my baby fever even more with some pro hero dads bc I love them and cherish them. Nanami is still ruling my heart though. Love ya💖💖💖
masterlist II rules
warnings: babies!!!!, domestic au, dad au, fluffy, no warnings really, unless it causes you baby fever so beware of the baby fluffs.
Todoroki Shoto
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-Baby was called from the daycare because the twins teacher couldn’t control their quirk manifesting. 
-Daycares are ready for quirk manifestation but someone hurt Rei and Ren kinda exploded and they couldn’t control the fire. 
-Rei got startled and her ice blocked both toddlers from the outside world as they were now existing in their own little igloo. 
-He panics because he fears that they hurt themselves or each other by using their quirks. 
-Scenarios of them attempting to hug each other, a habit they’ve had since they were wittle babies, and burning their skin or causing frostbite. 
-He rushed to their daycare, paperwork long forgotten on his agency’s desk as he stormed inside the classroom the small ice barrier splitting the room in two making his heart skip a beat. 
-Motioning to the teacher to leave he approached the block of ice, touching it with his left hand watching the ice melt as he finally spotted his two little girls, huddled together in the furthest spot of their igloo, trembling in each other’s arms. 
-Shoto ducked inside, slowly approaching them as they untangled from each other and rushed to him, meeting him half way in a crushing hug. 
-They both sobbed in his chest as he rubbed their backs. 
-Shushing them he tried to get a coherent story out of them but the only answer he managed to pry from them was a jumble of sorries and sobs.
-Picking them up, he asked them where their stuff was and after getting everything he excused all three of them and left the daycare, leaving a now melting igloo for the staff to clean up. 
-Back at home he managed to get them to calm down completely and made them something to eat. 
- “It’s alright, you protected each other like we’ve taught you. Your quirk activating is not your fault so stop blaming yourselves.” 
-They didn’t seem very convinced and they reminded him of himself back in high school, when he wouldn’t accept his left side as part of himself. 
-Hugging them close once again he left a kiss on each of their little heads, blowing a raspberry on their cheeks making them giggle at the feeling. 
-He loves the sound of their laugh. 
- “You have no control over your powers and that’s okay. Me and mommy will help you with that.” 
-Deep down he was proud of his girls. 
-They didn’t lose complete control and Rei managed to minimize her ice from coating the whole classroom. 
-He was so happy to have these two little things as his kids. 
-They truly were his world. 
- “I’m so proud of you my little snowflakes.”
Midoriya Izuku/ Deku
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-He thought his son was quirkless. 
-You were quirkless, he used to be quirkless so the logical thing was for your kid to also be quirkless. 
-Nope you were wrong. 
-Turns out he took after his grandma and he has a form of telekinesis. 
-Nothing really strong since both of his parents are biologically quirkless. 
-It was triggered while you were all chillin in your living room. 
-Izuku was scribbling something in one of his notebooks while your son was playing with his hero figurines on the floor. 
-You were watching kitchen wars. 
-Izuku’s phone started ringing and he shot up to get it, sending the notebook and pen flying across the room. 
-You were ready for the inevitable crash but it never came. 
-Looking up you saw both the notebook and the pen, levitating a few inches from the floor a slight green glow surrounding them.
-You were shocked looking back and forth from your four year old to the levitating objects. 
-Izuku was still talking on the phone and hadn’t realized the revelation that was being displayed in the living room. 
-Finally the call was over and he stepped back in, letting out a fucking SQUEAK when he saw his son using his quirk. 
-That was enough to break his concentration and the items clattered to the floor, your toddler looking back at his father with huge green eyes, chubby hands reaching out for him. 
-In a flash Izuku was on his knees next to the little boy, hugging him so close you thought he couldn’t breath. 
-He peppered his chubby face with kisses, praise pouring from his lips like rain as he raised the four year old into the air, baby giggles filling the room. 
-You joined them on the floor taking your fill of baby Midoriya pampering before looking at your husband, tears flowing down his cheeks. 
-You hadn’t seen him cry ever since your son said his first words. 
-And even then you couldn’t blame him, his first word was dada who wouldn’t cry? 
- “He has a quirk! Oh my god he has a quirk!” 
-Izuku brought both of you into a hug, crushing you to his chest as he kissed both of your foreheads. 
- “Thank you thank you thank you.” 
-It hit him like a truck how lucky he was to have you both. 
-A beautiful wife who loves him for who he is and not for his fame *like many other pros had warned him about* and a son who adores him and asks for daddy every second of the day. 
-He didn’t care about a quirk.
-He was scared that his son would also get bullied if he didn’t have one. 
-Right now everything was perfect. 
Bakugou Katsuki
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-If you asked him he didn’t want your son to get his quirk yet. 
-If he did that meant that he grew and he wasn’t his wittle baby anymore. 
-Your son was playing with his uncles outside while Katsuki was setting up the barbeque. 
-He was simultaneously holding your one year old and you were having a heart attack seeing your baby so close to a fire but you trusted him. 
-Your son was laughing his ass off as he was chased around the table by four grown ass adults. 
- “Be careful around the table.” 
-The fact that all five individuals said yes mom terrified you. 
-Heading back into the kitchen you only managed to reach the sink before a scream pierced the air and in a flash you were back outside, scanning the yard for who got hurt and where. 
-Then your eyes landed on your son who had a hand outstretched in front of him, smoke leaving his small palm while Kaminari was laying face down a few feet away from him, a groan leaving the pro hero as a palm shaped hole was etched on his shirt. 
-Everyone was silent as they stared at your four year old, eyes wide in awe at the sheer force of a singular explosion. 
-The person who broke the silence was Kirishima who let out a loud woah snapping all of you out of your stupor .
-Bakugou looked at you, pure disbelief in his gaze as his son turned to him. 
- “Dad I’m just like you!!” 
-You swear in his daze he almost yeeted your baby over his shoulder. 
-In one swift motion your son was in his other arm being swung around as their laughs synced into one. 
- “Hell yeah you are.” 
-Joining them you ruffled your son’s hair as you kissed his cheeks, a deep scarlet blush painting his plush cheeks as he hid his face in his dad’s shoulder. 
- “Bravo bud!” 
-Sero was next with the praise followed by Mina and Kaminari who also whined about his Hawaiian shirt being ruined. 
-For the next hours Katsuki didn’t let him go. 
-Didn’t want to let either of his kids go but it got kinda hard with the whole barbeque being his responsibility. 
- “We can train together, and work at the agency and go on patrols and…” 
-As your son rambled on about the things they could do now that he has his quirk, you looked at your husband, a soft smile plastered on his features. 
- “He will never stop needing you Katsu.” 
-You whispered as you kissed him softly on the cheek, catching a glimpse of a single teardrop leaving his eye before he quickly rubbed his face on your shoulder. 
- “I know.”
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shingia · 4 years
Text
DATING SUNA...
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in honor of this smexy middle blocker’s birthday, here are MANY hcs about what i think dating suna would be like (as exhaustively as possible) bcs he’s on my mind 25/8 <3
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cw : one or two suggestive stuff, mentions of food
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— EARLY RELATIONSHIP
• ok so suna would definitely not waste his time dating someone if he wasn’t truly in love
• that’s why it took him a few months to ask you out because 1. he wanted to be sure of his feelings 2. he wanted to be sure of yours 3. he was scared
• he probably acted detached at first, but it was just to compensate for the fact that you had him wrapped around your finger since day 1
• he probably didn’t officially tell his friends that you were dating and just casually kissed you before for his class (lowkey enjoyed leaving without a word while everyone else was freaking out)
• nicknames came after a few weeks, when he ‘accidentally’ called you babe after asking for a kiss. yeah he is that smooth
• because it took him so many months to ask you out, you already knew each other pretty well so he felt comfortable around you very quickly
• and he tried his best to make you feel the same if you were a bit more nervous
• honestly he couldn’t wait for you two to become closer over time <3 he's a sucker for the boyfriend/bestfriend dynamic
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— LOVE LANGUAGE
->| QUALITY TIME
• he cherishes every single moment you spend together, even if it’s just for a few minutes between classes
• sure, there are times where you two just hang out at his place or yours, scrolling on your phones and enjoying each other’s company. but tell him once that you want to talk to him about something and you’ll have his undivided attention
• and lemme just kdjqdhvjdmsjvh real quick : eye contact. that’s how you know he’s listening, and he always leans in just enough for you to know that he’s paying attention. no phone in sight, just you.
• he doesn’t need to take you out on fancy dates for it to be called quality time, because he values impromptu face-to-face late night conversations much more than a dinner at the restaurant.
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— DATES
• your first date was one of the only dates you spent outside, it was nothing extravagant you just went for coffee after school and ended up walking through the city, holding hands for the first time
• once you guys started officially dating, you realized that at-home dates were actually more your thing. but there needs to be a difference with the rest of the time you spend at home, so you always have one or two things planned like :
• cook together an elaborate meal for once, actually put an effort in the choice of the movie/tv show you’re gonna watch (and not end up watching rick and morty for the 23rd time this week), try the most questionable face masks recipes - he loves them and doesn’t even deny it
• but i feel like you guys might go out for your anniversaries, and it’s a great opportunity for him to take really nice pictures of you and update his phone’s lockscreen (he’s a huge simp)
• your dates often take place in the evening because he loves to see your face illuminated by the city lights, and he likes to know that you might get cold because he can be smooth af and give you his jacket (most of the pictures are taken when you’re wearing it)
• i think official and ‘elaborated’ dates with suna maybe occur every two weeks because he wants them to be special and likes to look forward to them
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— CUDDLES
• he gets a kick out of kissing your whole face except your lips, but really he’s just waiting for you to get frustrated and kiss him yourself
�� however, if you ever don’t play along he’ll stop like “wtf you’re not supposed to do nothing”
• he’ll give you lazy and passive cuddles where you just lay on top of him, hugging him while he watches something on tv or on his phone, BUT
• if he ever wraps a blanket around you then real cuddles begin. i’m talking scalp massages, back strokes, kisses, playing with your hands...
• i just know his kisses are aphrodisiac, there’s something about the way he holds your head still with his hands that’s just UGHHH
• you could be sharing a perfectly peaceful moment together and he’ll suddenly get bored and feel an urge to tickle your sides, squish your cheeks or randomly blow in your face/ear
• but god forbid you ever do that to him, he will crush you with all his weight until you can’t move
• he also uses your hand to scratch his back because he can’t do it without writhing like a cat, not that you’d complain about seeing that one day
• you two always end up dozing and losing track of time. “we stayed like that for NINETY MINUTES?” (he’d have to find an excuse for being late at practice, because there’s no way in hell he will tell the truth in front of the twins)
• it’s very likely that you guys wake up still cuddling after nine hours of sleep. i mean it’s canon that he has a good shoulder mobility so he can keep holding you even if you’ve moved in your sleep
• his biggest struggle is morning cuddles because it’s really hard for him to get out of bed and go on with his day when he’s so comfortable in bed with you
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— PDA
• i think he’d adapt to your needs, he doesn’t really mind pda
• if he ever pulls you in for a hug in public, it won’t always be a soft and sweet hug, no. sometimes it might look like a literal headlock, but he’ll give you a quick peck on the head to make up for it
• in fact the only times his hugs are sweet and lovey in public are after his matches
• if atsumu ever makes fun of him for ‘being a softie’, he’ll do the exact opposite of what’s expected of him : and by that i mean ruthlessly tongue-kiss you until tsumu begs him to stop
• he uses hugs as a way to talk shit to you about someone without them realizing it
• he doesn’t necessarily hold your hand all the time but he has affectionate gestures like giving you little pats on the head or wiping dirt off of your clothes
• pokes your cheek for no reason, and that’s daily
• he’s also a fricken tease and doesn’t have any problem with gripping your thigh when you’re sat at a table :)
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— COUPLE DYNAMIC
• he tries so hard to act like you’re the clingy one but everyone knows it’s a lie
• he probably has a private story called ‘being held against my will’ where it’s just him roasting you on a daily basis
• which is a great contrast with all the albums full of pictures of you in his camera roll. like i said, he’s a MAJOR SIMP
• you also have a private story called ‘exposing the truth’ and it’s filled with stolen clichés of him being a needy and whiny little bïtch (sorry i got carried away) : it’s the twins’ main source of blackmail
• i said before that suna’s a sucker for the boyfriend/bestfriend dynamic. yeah well you guys definitely have it - you can spend entire afternoons together without once acting like a couple
• he’d give you a kidney if you ever needed one, but steal one of his fries and he’ll flip your chair over without thinking twice
•  you both think that your failed attempts at being romantic are hilarious. one time he tried to kiss you under the rain but you were so cold that you couldn’t stop your teeth from chattering and yeah it was just terrible
• the efforts you put in to embarrass each other are remarkable. you once kissed him in a supermarket and he just pulled away, yelling “MOM AND DAD SAID NOT IN PUBLIC !”
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— RANDOM HCS THAT GIVE ME LIFE
• remember when i said you guys would do face masks together ? yeah well suna doesn’t own any headband which means that you have to tie his hair up in two pigtails at the front (it’s too short for one ponytail or a bun hehe)
• he has a silent laugh, the kind of laugh where he just wheezes while slapping his thighs, and he has to make a conscious effort to catch his breath
• he tugs on your sleeve whenever he wants to show you something <3
• in winter he writes messages on the frost of your car’s windows. nothing cheesy, probably something along the lines of “nice ass”
• he thinks it’s hilarious that your contact name in his phone is your full name, no emojis, nothing. he even put caps at the beginning 
• he sends you 30 tiktoks per day and expects you to answer to all of them
• he makes you playlists for the dumbest things. one of them is called ‘dentist appointment vibes’
• he likes to see you wear many layers of clothing in winter because he takes great pride in being the only one to know what’s hiding under them *wink*
• when he’s driving, he often tries to be smooth and stare at you lovingly when he’s at a red light, but he always misses the moment when it turns green and the other drivers start to furiously honk at him (another failed attempt at being romantic)
• i’m gonna be honest w/ you : he’s probably effortlessly seggsy when he drives
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in conclusion : you might not be the most romantic couple, but your vibes are 𝑖𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑐𝑢𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑒 because you’re both so madly in love with each other
pspsps: here’s a link to my suna playlist that fuels my mind with thousands of scenarios 
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collisiondiscourse · 4 years
Text
on the wonder duo (part 1)
(BNHA Analysis Post Ahead! This isn’t explicitly romantic, but it is an analysis of the relationship between the two most popular characters in BNHA--Katsuki Bakugou and Izuku Midoriya. Split into two posts because I realized that this was gonna be long as HELL)
yall ever think about the fact that the wonder duo is perfectly set up in so that bakugou and deku together are the better version of all might?
bc like. ive been thinking.
everyone knows the win to save and save to win parallel. How they are supposedly two halves of a whole perfect hero (which, previously, was defined as all might)
but ever since bakugou and deku started working as one—growing together to win AND save and continuously reminding each other that they shouldnt try to do things alone, ive realized that its BECAUSE theres two of them that they surpass all might. its not a case of deku and bakugou both being 50% of an ideal hero, but rather i think that they are 100% of what all might SHOULD HAVE BEEN from the very beginning.
as early as the AM v AFO battle in kamino, we see the effects of all mights flawed existence. the fact that he, the greatest and supposedly infallible symbol of peace, was destroyed—society had begun to collapse. there was suddenly no pillar to hold people together and the impacts were so severe that even in the latest chapters of mha it keeps on getting worse. the truth is, all mights biggest mistake was the burden he placed on his own shoulders
with bakugou and deku... its different.
its different for them because down to their attributions, they seem like two halves of a whole person.
i think that the wonder duo are going to surpass all might because of the fact that they work together.
@bakugoukatsuki-rising @svpercraigus @tybee​ @isaustraliaathing​
(batshit crazy and conspiratorial essay under the cut !)
1. Complementary Colors
I’d like to first preface literally everything I say by the fact that I am not an expert analyzer or literary major in any way. I am literally just some random fan on the internet who has wayyy too much time and looks wayyy too deep into things, but here we go!
A common thing we see when we talk about bakugou and deku is the way they are... sort of an inverse of one another.
Down to the design of their features and the way they move, Deku is the obviously softer of the two. There’s an intentional contrast between the two of them, in the way that Deku’s drawn with round shapes and curvy hair and the way Bakugou is literally all spikes and half-mast eyes and rough muscles. Bakugou’s movements too are languid and showy, with the way he leans when he walks and splays his legs and kicks open doors. Katsuki, in a casual sense, is loud and dramatic. 
Deku on the other hand s finicky. He jitters when he walks and he’s often fidgeting and mumbling. Comparatively, the aura he radiates is energetic and frenzied, even self-conscious to a point unlike Bakugou’s calm and confident movements.
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the point is, there’s a clear difference in how either of them are designed and what exactly they are supposed to represent. They utterly complement each other down to the way they behave and even their main colors (red-orange and blue-green) being literal complementary colors.
Now, moving to my more ungrounded points, this is quite a bit of a stretch so I’ll try as much as possible to make sense of these with hyperlinked sources because. yeah.
Down to their names, I think Deku and Bakugou both symbolize something deeper. I think that the way Hori expresses characters and what they’re meant to do is something that we have to pay close attention to when we talk about the Wonder Duo’s rise to success.
Izuku Midoriya (緑谷 出久), as some of us may know, does have an interesting meaning when broken up. According to a lovely fan translation of his name, ‘Izuku’--while not an actual name used commonly in real life--means to ‘Come out’ or ‘Long time’. ‘Midoriya’ on the other hand means (Midori) ‘Green’ and (ya) ‘valley’. The translator further pointed out that his first name ‘Izuku’ could be a reference to him being the first legendary hero to come out of the long-running All Might Era. (or, if you’ve been reading @/bakugoukatsuki-rising’s posts, the first significant anime protag in a long while to come out as queer, ppfft)
but that isn’t my focus right now.
We know that Hori LOVES telling stories with names, and more often than not in the BNHA universe, names alone tell us a lot of things about the characters. When referring to Izuku’s last name, Midoriya, it’s important I think to step back and realize that hey, maybe there’s something more to Green Valley than just the fact that his motif is all green.
After searching for a lil on the specifics of green valley, I’ve found out that across many cultures, the colour green and valleys in general tend to represent life. From dream analysts, to Christianity, and even old Taoist teachings, valleys are seen as areas of fertility and escape. They are seen as safe havens and often escapes for people to come to after running away from bad circumstances.
(Sound familiar?)
Deku, in essence represents life and peace. He represents being the “salvation” that the world in BNHA needed. To me, it sounds like Horikoshi is trying to say that he is the long-awaited hero in the sense. The one that people can feel will create a society that feels safe for everyone after years of All Might just saving people from themselves as a band-aid solution.
On the other hand, we have Katsuki Bakugou (爆豪 勝己), who’s name we commonly know means (Katsuki) Winner and (Bakugou) Explosion Master. He is essentially, the champion. The power. His name means success and power and all the things that make up winning.
When putting them side by side, it then becomes increasingly... interesting to me how their names almost perfectly slot into All Might’s save to win and win to save mantra, and how they are both quintessential parts to what made All Might as a hero.
2. Hero Too!
Now, I’m not even gonna really TOUCH much of what happens in canon. If you want me to do a step by step breakdown of their arcs in regards to the plot of manga and anime, feel free to send me a gratuitous ko-fi tip so I can pay for the headache I get after trying to organize my thoughts into word vomit.
What I WILL talk about on the other hand, is the subtle shift both of them slowly have in regards to how they look. Bakugou and Deku, while growing up, seem to have MANY many parallels--but before I elaborate on all of that, I wanna talk about something else.
Detour: Deku’s Red Shoes 
We all know the iconic symbol being Deku’s red shoes. For all his life, save for some outfits like his hero one, we see Deku more often than not wearing his signature red sneakers which have become a running joke in fandom.
But the funny thing is, in Japan, red shoes seem to have an interesting connotation.
In 1922, a popular Japanese nursery rhyme was written, called “Red Shoes”. The interesting part to me about this song was the symbolism that, in my tiny pea-sized brain, I could connect to the story of BNHA.
The story goes that there was a little girl with red shoes named ‘Kimi’. She was from Shizuoka prefecture (which, if you didn’t know, is most likely where Musutafu supposedly is) and was raised by a single mother. When she was young, her mother had to entrust her with a foreigner under the impression that they would give her a better life in America. The stranger is a man named Charles Hewitt (who was described to have blue eyes) and supposedly took her away. 
The singer of the song (supposedly the mother, but some argue it was written from the perspective of a childhood friend) believes that Kimi is happy and living a better life away from them, when the reality of the situation was much worse. The young girl with red shoes in actuality had Tuberculosis, and thus the foreigner whom she was entrusted to had left her to fend for herself and eventually left her to go to America while she died alone and orphaned.
“When I see red shoes, I think of her.”
A very interesting story with very interesting implications indeed.
-
Anyway, moving on to the more... “nuanced” and connected parts of this section, I have every reason to believe that Bakugou and Deku were simply MEANT to be working together down to how they dress. Now, I’d like to discuss their hero costumes.
At the start of their series, using these godawful pics for reference, it’s clear to see that neither of them seem alike in any way--reflecting the dissonance in their relationship at that point in canon.
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ough. deku why. (yes we know why its because you love your mom you stupid little bunny <3)
Anyway, we see an immediate gap in how the two of them are. Deku’s first costume is one that reflects how he treated his dream of being a hero. He was still in that childlike idolization phase, the one where his dreams and aspirations were hinged on pure feelings and inspiration from All Might. Katsuki on the other hand was a lot more tactical--professional to an extent. The gap between their respective development with their quirks is something that is clearly felt in every fashion decision they’d made.
(Notice how Deku’s green is a lot brighter and less like the green accents Katsuki has all over his costume.)
As time progressed however... their costumes changed. The colors, the silhouettes, the practical functions, most things.
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(Deku’s Gamma Costume and Bakugou’s Winter Costume used respectively)
we begin to notice a few similarities.
As the show goes on and we see more evolutions of their costumes, it almost seems like they begin to look like a matching pair. Deku’s green grows darker and almost teal in nature, while Bakugou’s orange is veering towards red territory. This is important to note because red-orange and blue-green as I said earlier were complementary colors as compared to simply orange and green. The minute shift is something I really wasn’t quite sure was intentional, but something I find interesting to pick up nonetheless as the colors they used to accent their costumes begin to match up.
Secondly, I think and important thing to note is silhouettes. The way that both Bakugou and Deku’s costumes are designed follow a lot of parallels that typically we don’t see with the rest of 1-A. For one, they both have a combination of tight long-sleeved tops with a bulkier set of bottoms. They also share the use of utility belts and metal pieces typically worn around their necks. Deku has his bunny-eared hood that mimics All Might’s hair, while Bakugou has his orange and black explosion ear-pieces that mimic his own quirk.
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i don’t think any other people in class 1-A match each other as subtly yet strongly as these two. Uraraka and Deku and Bakugou and Kirishima do come close however.
“But Codi, you fucking knob!” I hear you plea. “This is such a reach and tells us practically NOTHING!” And yes, I’m inclined to agree with you! You’d be sort of right in the idea that this is a reach. Maybe I am looking too much into this, and maybe it really isn’t that deep--but I do think that them subconsciously matching outfits means something quite brilliant.
In the way that their costumes are designed, each aspect of either outfits have a very logical explanation. The changes were strategic and made with their fighting styles vividly in mind, so what that tells me is that BECAUSE these costumes are so complementary or similar in nature (Bakugou’s reinforcing his arms while Deku reinforces his legs), these two are implicitly showing the audience that their combat styles are complementary as well. 
The evolution of their design choices and similarities tell us that even unknowingly, their minds line up in strategy on the battlefield--a clear exhibit for why they would be INCREDIBLY POWERFUL as a Hero Duo to begin with.
When I look at their hero costumes side by side, I see a mirror. I see the way that these two are reflections of each other and are strong where the other isn’t. The point I see in BNHA repeatedly is that EVERYONE HAS A WEAKNESS. Nothing is infallible, regardless of how hard you train or how powerful your quirk is. Everyone will always have a weakness, but the significant difference I see when fandom discusses the future of Pro-Hero Society is that the new generation is finally raising itself to be RELIANT on each other. 
Observing their fighting styles and the simple use of their quirks, its obvious that they are indeed two parts of a whole hero. Bakugou, who’s quirk emphasized his arms and hands and the power that comes from it, while Deku who’s quirk now emphasizes his legs and lower body and the way he’s always running to save people.
IN CONCLUSION:
As they become heroes, it is easy to assume that if nothing else, Bakugou and Deku will cover each other’s weak spots (especially when you consider the way Deku probably won’t be able to keep using his arms with the way both the anime and manga are going...) (also chapter 285, anyone?)
-
Part Two: Interactions, OfA
kofi || commission details
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alilbihh · 4 years
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woods&witches — knj
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masterlist
pairing: namjoon x reader
summary: You think it ends with you saving a fox. That is, until you start getting love letters sent to your doorstep and little knick knacks left on your window sill.
genre: fox shifter!namjoon, witch!reader, fluff
words: 4.5k
a/n: this was meant for the bingo challenge but completely escaped its original prompt. anyway. heres shy!lovestruck!namjoon bc i love him. also no this is nOt a witch au blog idk whats wrong w me
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A finch flutters onto your windowsill, and you shuffle over once you hear a tap, tap, tap on the glass. You push it open and the bird hops inside, beak leaning forward tentatively.
You take the letter. "Ah, so they sent you this time?" Or maybe the finch volunteered, you wouldn't be surprised. They are quite the gossips.
It's a soft blue envelope, and when you turn it over there's a scrawled #12 on the left side corner. You think that even if he hadn't written that, you'd know. It's easy to keep track, after all.
A maple leaf slips out when you open the envelope. You set it aside and tentatively take the letter, brush a hand over the ink. It was written by hand in messy but deliberate hand writing and it smells like chamomile and honey, like it was written under a half-moon.
You read it once then twice then three times until it feels like you've been dipped halfway underwater, until the buzzing of the midday cicadas has faded into white noise and everything is suddenly tinged blue.
The man, you deduced a while ago, tells tales of palm trees and blue ponds and red and pink frogs, of catching crabs on a stranded shore. He's writing poetry but he's not, writing reality but he's not, and you don't know how he does it, how he can make five paintings with just one phrase.
You clutch the letter to your chest, feel yourself have an out of body experience because of a not-poem. Your head whips towards the finch when it chirps suddenly, and you huff.
"Why're you still here?" You shield the letter from the bird's eyes. Its head tilts. "And don't give me that look, I know exactly what you're thinking."
The bird only gives another chirp before flying away.
You scoff out a laugh, and when you walk towards your bedside table, the drawer opens before you can even think too much about it. You glare at your walls before tucking the letter with the others, as if to stop the house from teasing you too much.
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It all begins and ends on a sunny afternoon.
The tree roots whisper as you pass, as if to purposely lead you astray, but you follow them anyway. The forest is never wrong, after all.
So when you stumble against a snowy white fox lying on a field of wisteria, you're only a tad bit surprised.
"Ah, you don't want to do that," you say some time after it woke up in your home and stopped panicking. It's now looking down at your polka dot socks, then looks up sharply to stare at you. You don't think there's a way for foxes to show emotions, but you think that if there were, he'd be staring at you with a little bit of awe.
You clear your throat. "Your foot, I mean. You don't want to strain it."
It just keeps staring at you, one ear twitching a bit.
"Um." You say when it doesn't stop, "You'll be better in a few weeks time. It wasn't that serious."
The fox blink blink blinks before shaking itself off, fur spilling every which way. You take it as acknowledgement enough.
In a few minutes he's managed to sniff and inspect every piece of furniture in your home, ranging from your small couch to your droopy house plant. He trudges and limps and sometimes skips from place to place, and then becomes highly confused when you don't let him climb the kitchen table.
Yoongi appears on your window somewhere between the fox kneading at your rug and the fox trying to catch a moth with its mouth.
"Hey grump," you say to the black cat, scratching behind his ears. Yoongi's tail twitches in dismissal, but he whines when you stop petting him, anyway.
You can almost see when Yoongi's gaze settles on the fox, because when you turn to look he's frozen solid on your couch, as if hoping he can't be seen if he stays still enough. The cat gives you a look.
You raise a brow. "What? Don't look at me like that."
He keeps looking at you like that.
"I helped him over by the wisteria. His foot's a little bad, but it's nothing too bad." The fox stays curled up on your couch, digging his nails into the cushions much like a cat would. An ear twitches in your direction, as if he's sheepish but won't admit to it.
Yoongi mewls a single, drawn out mewl of acceptance. You nod nod nod, and the cat jumps down your window and disappears into the woods right when the wind starts blowing north and the sun starts climbing higher before dropping lower.
The world stills for a while as you work through your home, organizing your chipped cups and bent spoons and funny forks. The mushroom wraith on your door wiggles when you pass it by, and when the frog figurine on your counter croaks in greeting the fox nearly jumps out of its skin.
(The fox is gone by morning, right when the sun settles over the honeysuckle tumbling down your thatched roof. You try to feel for his presence, but it's overwhelmed by the snails and woodpeckers and oversized mushrooms.
You think that's when the letters started coming, perched nicely over your windowsill whenever you're not looking).
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There's a man in your pond.
The carp in the water yells indignantly as the man tries to stand but tumbles, pondweed curled over his ankles as if begging him to stay. You just stare because the man tries to get up once then twice then three times, hair loose and windblown and positively drenched, twigs and pondweed in the knots.
You stare and stare until the man notices you and startles, looks away quickly before cringing and hesitatingly meeting your eyes. He lifts a hand, lowers it, lifts it again and waves. You wave back.
"Hello." You say. The man looks a little stunned, more stunned than when the carp had nipped at his feet. You point at the pond, "You're standing in my pond."
"Ah!" He startles, head whipping down like he'd forgotten all about it. "I am! In your pond, I mean. Sorry, sorry." The pondweed untangles itself mercifully, and he shuffles out of the water, toes curling into the dirt around it.
"It's okay!" You shoot him a thumbs up. He stares. "Do you want to, uh, come inside?"
So the man walks through the slim wooden trellis and diligently wipes his feet on the rug, shuffling through the door with hesitant steps. He looks a little like a painting left out too long in the rain, all ruffled hair and stiff shoulders, but pretty nonetheless.
"Would you like some tea?" You say, already grabbing the kettle from the cupboards, "It will have to have milk, though, since the cups don't like serving without."
"Okay! Tea is nice. Thank you." Then he smiles with knee-deep dimples and pinchable cheeks and something inside you kinda melts a little.
The man's name is Namjoon and his skin is tan despite it already being winter, the color of salted caramel. He's so bright you find it easier to look away, to look instead at the space around him, the shadow against the pane of his neck, the length of his-- very long legs. You'll pretend you never noticed that.
You don't talk about why he was in your pond, not really. He's already apologized to the carp, he says. You talk instead about mushroom glades and why avocados are acceptable dinner foods and his intense love for moths and his hopes for snow this year.
When Namjoon leaves it all feels a bit unprecedented. Lost souls show up on your doorstep often, always leaving after a cup of tea and a few helpful directions, but Namjoon doesn't look lost at all. Looks a little like he belongs, really.
He rubs awkwardly at the back of his neck, then sticks a hand out in offering. You shake his hand. He nods, lingers on the doorway, plays with a loose stitching of his soft green overalls.
"I'll-- be seeing you, then," he clears his throat, and you just laugh a little loosely because no, you won't. With lost souls, you never do.
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Except Namjoon does return. He returns, in fact, in green baseball shorts and an open-collared shirt with sugar packets sticking out of the front pockets. He looks a bit like a dad showing up for his son's football game. Looks a little dangerous but in a harmless way, like a huge gangly bug. A six-foot stick insect hovering outside your door.
You're a little stunned. Very stunned. So stunned that Namjoon cringes, shuffles a bit on your welcome mat. It's a frog with a thought bubble that says welcome! that Namjoon has expressed his love for on multiple occasions.
"Hello," he purses his lips. "I... wanted to thank you. Again. For everything." He sucks in a breath. "Bad time? Bad time. I don't actually remember knocking-- did I knock? God, I didn't, did I? I'm so rude, I'm so sorry."
"No, no," you say once you've recovered. "You, you definitely knocked."
"Oh!" His lips form a surprised little 'o'. You're so fond. "That's good. Okay. I'll... be leaving, then."
"Um!" You interject, "You can come inside, if you want?"
So he comes inside and drinks tea and names the cactus by your windowsill Gerald and discusses his complaints on climate change and you're a little content and a lot confused, because--
Only creatures of the forest can find your house more than once.
Unless--
(That night, you knock on your own walls and glare indignantly. Say, "You led him here, didn't you?"
The walls do nothing. You think you hear a floorboard creak, though.
You stomp your feet like an overgrown child. "I don't know what you're trying to accomplish, but I'm not falling for it!"
No response. Except the wind chimes outside sing brightly, but when you look out the window there's no wind at all).
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Namjoon visits once then twice then three times, always showing up unplanned and out of nowhere. He brings a pinecone first then a dandelion next, blushes and says I didn't pluck them against their will! I told them they looked pretty and they volunteered to help me.
He's so pretty it's become a little harder to hold in. He was always pretty, always smiles a bit too brightly, like he's swallowed a star and can't quite keep all the brightness to himself, but something's shifted a bit.
(You contemplate this in a mid afternoon. As in: whisper-screaming to the ceiling for a while. And then whisper-screaming some more when Yoongi walks directly across your face.
"You're a monster," you inform him.
He digs his tiny monster-claws into your stomach.)
One day, you learn the man is weirdly good at knitting. You learn he has a pretty solid grasp on quantum physics. You learn that when he laughs it's a little hah! under his breath, and when he really laughs it turns sideways and belly-up, pitching into something that could almost be defined as a giggle. You learn that you need to stop staring.
Another day, Namjoon sits in the corner of your couch, curled up reading a book he'd picked up from the next village over. It's small but very thick with what could only be very small letters, because he's squinting a bit as he reads. It's vastly endearing.
Another day, he makes cheesy bread in your toaster and felt bad about it for the next three weeks. Which is also the amount of time it took for you to get all the cheese out.
Everything's great.
Today, though, you're walking through the forest alone. The forest doesn't guide you, not really, maybe because it knows you're walking on your own terms.
The forest is noisy with the sounds of birds calling and trees growing and little things skipping here and there through the undergrowth. Your shoes are so muddy you don't really care for how much worse they get, and they squelch when your heels sink into puddles and spongy moss.
You walk and walk until you come across a clearing, a bird feeder propped neatly over a tree branch. A sparrow squawks when it sees you.
"Hello," you say in greeting, and the tree with the bird feeder sighs, the wind blowing and carrying the sound.
A tree root on the ground grabs a fistful of dirt and promptly flings it onto your knees. You shriek indignantly.
You have a lot to figure out, the tree echoes because of course it does. It has a history of saying things vaguely and hoping you'll understand.
"I don't understand," you say out loud.
It flings more dirt onto your knees. You step back protectively, "Okay, okay! I get it!"
One, two. Four clouds in the sky, for now, it says at last, and you're a bit afraid of prying, so you just accept what it says as fact and move on, say one last goodbye to the bluetit that flutters onto the bird feeder.
It starts raining not long after that, when more than four clouds settle over the evening sun, makes it a bit harder to maneuver through the woods. You walk based on feeling, a hand brushing over the tree trunks, silently cursing the tree.
Namjoon is already waiting when you arrive home, hurries forward when he spots you through the trees, holding an umbrella up high.
And it's-- sweet. Just a really sweet thing to do, really considerate. He could have waited inside, in the warmth and shelter, but instead he's walking through puddles to meet you halfway with an umbrella.
He looks a little funny when he stops in front of you, hair disheveled and sticking up in random places, eyes all worried and sullen. He looks like a goose.
"You look like a goose," you say out loud with a little laugh, "I'm already wet though, so there's not much point in this, you know?"
Namjoon's smile is a bit dopey, a bit sloppy at the edges. "But there's not many trees to shield you, from this point on." He says, "Let's-- go inside?"
So you go inside, the house already setting the fireplace with its never-ending firewood, the frog figurine croaking and the wind chimes singing and everything feels a little right. A little more homey.
"Did you find your way back easily?" Namjoon says later, hands cupping his tea mug as he sheepishly adds, "I know this is your-- home, obviously, I don't wanna just assume anything, but-- For me, it's a bit harder to navigate when it rains like this. Fogs my senses and all," he clears his throat.
You purse your lips to keep from smiling, "Do you know how a wood witch works, Namjoon?" You continue when he shakes his head, "A wood witch is the one who planted the first seed that sprouted the first tree that grew the first forest," you say, half-chanting it, cite it like a rhyme long forgotten.
He looks a bit awe-struck. A lot awe-struck. Says, "Oh." And that's that.
You add, sheepish, "It's really not much. I'm not as powerful as other wood witches, but I am grateful to the woods." You hum, "They gave me this cottage. They gave me who I am, really."
"Oh." Namjoon says. "Oh." He stares and stares, open mouthed and in awe and sort of dazed but pretty, pretty. His gaze trails over the room once before settling back on you, says, "You're all the beauty in the world."
And the world-- stills, maybe-- balanced atop a drop of nectar.
You whisper a small, delighted "Oh." And that's that.
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Namjoon somehow manages to drag you outside the woods.
You're being dragged through busy streets, cars and crowds and carriages that boggle your senses. The difference between the village and the woods is astounding. (Not that you've never been to nearby cities or villages-- sometimes you crave poptarts and there's nothing you can do about it-- but it's been a while since you've walked into the very heart of it).
You might be a wood witch, but Namjoon is the one who looks a little — lost, outside the woods.
"This is my favorite corner cafe," he admits proudly, "Um, if Seokjin-hyung says anything, please be aware I'm not associated with him."
"Got it." You like this Seokjin guy already.
Taylor Swift is blasting through the speakers when you walk inside, a broad shouldered man swaying from side to side behind the counter as he pours milk into a cup. Once his eyes land on Namjoon he positively grins.
"Namjoon, my man!" He belts out a particularly impressive high note as Namjoon approaches him, but no one around seems at all fazed. "It's been so long!"
"I've been here last week, hyung." Namjoon says but he seems a bit happy to be missed, sheepishly ducking his head.
"That's too long. You should visit more often, it's great! I get free coffee here and don't have to walk through muddy paths and ominous sounds to visit you."
"It's not free though?" Namjoon frowns, "You may own the shop but you're the one who buys all the coffee in the first place."
The man behind the counter makes a noise that's too distorted to understand. "If I wanted someone to tear apart my ideas with logic I'd talk to Yoongi, you're both insufferable."
You want to interject but at the same time don't. You get so absorbed in your own thoughts you almost don't notice when they mention a Yoongi. Huh.
"Oh, you know Yoongi? The cat?" You blink when two sets of eyes settle on you.
"Ah, yes. Yoongi." The man you've now established has to be Seokjin sighs, resting a chin over his palm, "The devious fiend. The pest of the nest. The gremlin goblin."
"Do you ever think before you speak."
"I do! I thought of those words and then I said them."
Namjoon sighs and none of them elaborate any further, but you decide not to pry. You can always just ask Yoongi, anyway.
You both sit in a booth in the far corner where light reflects onto it perfectly but not in an overwhelming way, just enough to be warm and comforting. Seokjin pads over with your drink and Namjoon's latte and shoots excessive finger guns as he leaves, and Namjoon looks a bit like he's refraining from apologizing on his behalf.
Namjoon doodles on napkins and talks like he's reciting a far off poem, except he's talking about what should be the correct pronunciation of pickles and you're kinda maybe really hopelessly endeared.
"Do you think I should paint my nails?" He's saying, closely inspecting his nibbled nails, "Maybe it will make me stop biting my nails."
"Have you thought of green?"
He hums delightedly, "Green! I love green. I'm thinking pink though, since gender norms are a social construct and pink is just pretty in general."
"You'll look like a pretty little winter fairy!" You grin. He flushes pink, too.
Then when you get up to order another drink he stands quick, as if intending to order it for you, but you're already grinning and skipping to the counter and when you turn to look at him he's slowly sitting back down, defeated.
You're maybe smiling too hard when Seokjin walks to take your order. "Ah, Y/n-ssi! How may I help you, my gentle woodland elf?"
"Can I just have the same thing, please?" You say and he hums, walking mechanically towards his cabinets.
Then after staring dazedly at the separate christmas mugs and cinnamon buns and droopy plants, you're looking around when you spot a box by the back counter that looks like an awful lot like a letter slot, a stack of envelopes sitting neatly on top. Oh.
"What's that for?" You gesture towards the box, and Seokjin turns away from the coffee grinder to smile something a little gentle. A little secretive.
"We're a letter shop too, you know?" He looks like he's suppressing a sort of devious smile he doesn't want you to see, "We deliver letters on the writer’s behalf, so the sender stays anonymous."
Your organs twist and melt together all at once. You mumble a small "Oh" and that's that.
Then when you leave Seokjin winks before sending you both off, the man waving boisterously and maybe obnoxiously but you're immensely endeared, wave back until the shop is out of sight and Namjoon is sufficiently embarrassed.
You predictably invite Namjoon inside after you arrive home, deciding that soup after coffee doesn't sound too bad. So you watch as the fireflies do somersaults and the moths hover over lamps as you both go for seconds and then for thirds and you don't say much, maybe say nothing at all, but that's okay, too.
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The soup signals a change, you think. Either
1) You are in love with Namjoon and need to tell him.
Or
2) You are in love with soup and need to seek help.
So you walk through the forest.
Namjoon is at home, you know, but you feel that talking to Namjoon about your possible love for Namjoon is a bit counterproductive, so you walk through the forest instead.
Everyone is still adjusting to last night's downpour, the floors muddy and the leaves droopy and everything smelling like wet earth. You walk but you're hovering a few inches off the ground, silently thank the forest for its kindness.
You walk through the forest again the next day, think back to the tree with the bird feeder and think that maybe he wasn't so vague after all. Just wish that he could tell you what to do next.
It's easier to listen to a tree's vague advice than it is to follow through with it, you think, until a few weeks later, when the universe decides you need a little push. A big push. The biggest push.
Namjoon has been visiting consistently for the past month or so, sometimes staying over and sometimes staying just before nightfall, but for maybe a week you haven't heard of him at all. He's disappeared without a trace.
The forest guides you this time, patches of sunlight shining through trees as you follow. You think you hear the shrill argument between a finch and a jay on the treetops as you navigate through mushroom patches and mossy rocks.
It's the field of wisteria. You're in the field of wisteria when you find a small burrow, a little home for a woodland creature.
When you turn, you see-- Namjoon. Namjoon, eyes widened in horror, a strangled sound breaking free from his throat. Two white fox ears standing ramrod straight on his head.
You clear your throat. Say, "Hi, Namjoon."
He shrieks.
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A finch flutters onto the bird feeder, eyes twinkling, "Guys, you will not believe what I just found out--"
"We know," the jay says.
"We know," the bluetit says.
"We know," the sparrow says.
Even Yoongi mewls from a higher tree branch.
The finch squawks, gossip stolen from right under its wing, "How on Earth did you all know?"
"The forest made the house bigger," Yoongi drawls, tail swishing here and there, "And we all helped deliver the letters."
"Different from someone, we can actually keep secrets!" Says the jay, chest puffed proudly, ignoring the offended squeals from the finch.
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"You know, it was actually kind of obvious."
You hum from beside Namjoon, his arm draped over the back of the couch inches away from dropping onto your shoulder. He wants to tug you closer, comb a hand through your hair, but the mere thought has his face burning and ears threatening to pop out at the stress. He's kissed you before, dozens of times, for many reasons and for no reason at all, but it all still feels a little nerve wrecking, like one push will have you burst at the seams.
(Which, frankly, is ridiculous-- you're the strongest person he knows, but-- but.)
"What is?" He says to distract himself.
"The letters stopped coming after you started showing up, and you literally took me to a letter shop." You falter and add, "And just.. the way you say things, it sounds like how you sound when you write. I don't know if I'm making sense, but it's-- nice." You explain, a hint of affection on your voice.
That has nothing to do with being a fox shifter and everything to do with you sitting so prettily next to him, smelling like Ilsan sunshine and kept promises and damp earth, like the forest itself.
"Hmm," he hums, a hand settling on your thigh, finally gathering the courage to drop his arm onto your shoulder--
"Namjoon, you really don't have to hesitate for this kind of stuff." You say, turning to look at him with a grin. His face burns as he clears his throat pointedly, crossing one leg over the other as he finally drops an arm over your shoulder.
"M'sorry," he mumbles.
"Don't be," You press a kiss to his chin, "And you better kiss me properly this instant, because it seems you still think that crocs are acceptable footwear. I'm gonna come to my senses any second now."
"Please don't," he says, a little wild. Then he's moving, nose brushing over your cheek, and then— and then—
A hand curling softly over your cheek, a little giggle, and his lips pressing gently over your own. Something a bit real. Un-takeback-able. You taste a lot like the poetry he writes, still writes, like you're pressing the wonders of the world to his lips, like he's skimming the universe with his hands.
(Once upon a time, you saved a fox lying in a field of wisteria.
The rest of the story is told in open envelopes, messages left for the moon to see.)
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