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im-not-a-joke · 4 years

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The Soulmate AU Thing

Whoop I wrote it

Read it on ao3

based off this post (and the comments on it)

warnings: none, really, there’s a little cursing and like a tad bit of internalized homophobia but it’s very minor

Relationships: Byler, Stoncy (but like, once, and its vague), Dustin/Lucas/Max/El

Wordcount: 1,753

you can also read it below the cut

The realization hit Mike like a truck.

Will and I are soulmates.

He had been minding his own business, just going about his regular day when he remembered the lab and Will’s episodes and seeing his best friend lose control of his own body. He remembered the Mark that was left exposed after the doctors had taken Will’s shirt. The same Mark that matched Mike’s own. He hadn’t thought about it at the time, being more concerned about his best friend being possessed. And he had forgotten in the aftermath, too busy focusing on said aftermath and the quickly approaching holidays.

Well, forgotten may have been a strong word. He didn’t think it ever left his mind, but he had pushed it to the side temporarily to deal with bigger problems. He had quoted it during his Big Emotional Speech, but that was beside the point.

Now it was January, and Mike was back in school and bored out of his mind, so he let it wander. And it wandered to the little black you said yes imprinted on Will’s side. Luckily for Mike, Will had been possessed during his speech and most likely didn’t remember him saying it. (But the look in his eyes when Mike said it told him otherwise. Oh God, what if he knows that Mike knows what if he hates him oh no oh no no nonononono-)

(Deep breaths, Wheeler)

Mike had never really considered his soulmate. Sure, he occasionally wondered what they would be like and when they would meet, but who didn’t? And yes, he had found himself thinking about his small friend a little bit too much, but that was just because they’ve been friends since they were five, right? Apparently not, he grimaced to himself, how are you going to deal with this one?

But that would have to come later, for now he had to make it through the day.

It wasn’t until he got home that the other realization hit him.

I’m gay.

That one was less surprising. He had never really been interested in girls, and liked El significantly less now that she looked more feminine. He had realized after the Snowball that he felt like El was more of a sister to him, and they had come to a mutual agreement to be friends and nothing more.

He supposed that the gay thing made sense, but he worried about what everyone else would think if and when they found out. Nancy would probably be okay, she had never really agreed with their father on anything, and Mike doubted she would start agreeing when it came to gay people. His dad might be more of a problem, but he didn’t have to know. Not yet, at least. His mom was a wild card. He hoped she wouldn’t be disgusted by him, but there was really no telling. His friends would understand, he hoped. Lucas would. He had once confided in Mike that he had three Marks, so he would definitely not be grossed out by Mike being gay.

But what about Will? His reaction would probably be the most important. He was Mike’s soulmate after all. He wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t want to be Mike’s friend anymore, especially with having dealt with Lonnie. But, soulmates were supposed to work out, right? Maybe not, he was 90% sure his parents weren’t soulmates anyway, so maybe his Mark was broken. Oh God, what if his was broken?

It couldn’t be. That’s not how things worked. He was just tired and overthinking, a good nap would help. But, he had homework to do first. Ugh, homework.

~~~~~~~

Do you remember the first day that we met?

“Nancy, can I talk to you?”

“What did you do?”

“Nothing, it’s just,” come on, Mike! You can do it! “I like boys and not girls,”

Nancy’s face softened, she pulled the collar of her turtleneck down to reveal two soulmarks, one, a camera, the other, the nailbat.

“Oh.”

It was.. It was the first day of kindergarten. I knew nobody.

“Lucas, we’ll always be friends, right?” They were sat on Lucas’ bed, and Mike was reminded of Lucas’ angry, confused confession just a year prior.

“Yeah, unless you like, murder my soulmates,” Lucas had made a lot of progress, part of which was finding out that Max was one of his soulmates, and that, he didn’t hear it from Lucas but, she also had three soulmarks. Mike was 90% sure it would turn out to be Lucas, Dustin, Max, and El but never mentioned it.

“I’m gay. Will is my soulmate.” Lucas looked shocked for all of three seconds before he smiled at Mike.

“I’m glad you could tell me, dude.” He didn’t ask how Mike knew the Will thing, he just patted him on the back and went back to talking about the last family movie night he had to suffer through.

I had no friends. I just felt so alone and, and so scared

“Guys, I have to tell you something important.”

“What’s up, Mike?” He had four pairs of eyes on him. Two curious, one annoyed, and one knowing.

It was one of the few days Hopper would let all of them visit El in the cabin, but Will had a doctor’s appointment. Mike missed him, the group wasn't the same without Will there to offer his typically cheerful input. Mike also felt like he was third-wheeling the four other kids.

“I’m gay, I like boys.” El’s expression didn’t change, Dustin looked somehow, relieved? Max softened, but tried to keep up the annoyed flair. Lucas wore a proud smile.

“Doesn’t everyone like boys?”

“No, El, usually boys only like girls and girls only like boys.” That made it sound bad, fuck, backtrack backtrack backtrack-

“It’s not a bad thing, you can like whoever you want.” Thank the lord for Lucas Sinclair, saving Mike’s ass since first grade.

“Oh, well, in that case, I like boys and girls,” El looked pleased now, and the other three went red. Definitely soulmates.

But I saw you on the swings, you were alone too. You were just swinging by yourself.

“Steve, I need your advice”

“I swear to all things good and holy Dustin, if this is about any of your little- oh hey, Mike. What’s up?”

“You like boys and girls, right?” Mike barely knew where he wanted this conversation to go. But he knew Steve was definitely the one to go to.

“Yeah, why?”

“How did you tell people that you weren’t sure about their reactions?”

“Hey uh, are you, are you bi?” Mike had never seen Steve this reserved before, it felt like he was trying to approach a scared animal, well, he may as well have been a scared animal at this point.

“No, no, I’m gay, i just, I want to tell my mom and Will but I’m worried about how they’ll react.” Mike had to cut himself off. He could feel himself start rambling and he didn’t want to say too much.

“Oh, ok then, uh,” he paused to think, “I think Will will be fine. As for your mom, probably sit her down and just rip the bandaid.” If he thought Will was going to be fine, he probably would be, Mike trusted Steve, he usually knew what he was doing.

“Thanks, Steve.”

“No problem, big guy,” and Steve wrapped him in a hug.

And I just walked up to you, and, I asked. I asked if you wanted to be my friend

“Mom, I have to talk to you.” There was a rare moment of peace in the Wheeler house, and he was going to take advantage of it. He sat himself next to her on the couch, avoiding eye contact.

“Mike, sweetie, what’s wrong?” The concern in her voice gave him hope. Things would be okay, she would love him no matter what.

“I know who my soulmate is, and uh, he’s a boy. And I really like him.” Mike had retracted in on himself, but his mom just grabbed his wrists gently, pulling his hands toward her.

“Mike,” he finally made eye contact to see her smiling down at him, eyes brimming with tears, “thank you for telling me, I am so proud of you, and I love you.”

He collapsed into her for a hug and cried. It had gone well.

And you said yes. You said yes.

“I’m gay.” He was finally telling Will, the most important person in his life, after a good three months since his realization.

“Me too.”

And that was that.

And it was the best thing I’ve ever done.

~~~~~~~~

It had been four months since Mike came out to Will (and vice versa), and Mike could barely hold it in anymore. Lucas had been bugging him about telling Will the thing since he had come out. He wanted to do it, but could never find the time without making things awkward.

The six of them were walking up the hill to set up Cerebro, WIll and Mike trailing behind slightly. Dustin was rambling on, holding hands with El (the four of them had come to their realization and had been inseparable ever since). Mike was going to do it now. He had to.

“Hey, uh, Will?”

“Hmm?”

“Can we, uh, talk?” He grabbed his wrist, and turned to face him, they had both stopped walking at this point. Will looked confused, usually Mike was very forward.

“What do you need?” Mike’s brain was firing at a million miles an hour, he had no idea what he was going to do.

“I have something to show you.” He was doing it. It was happening, this was real. He lifted his shirt a bit to reveal the small lettering on his side in the same place as Will’s. Will’s eyebrows shot up into his hair.

“I saw yours back in November when we had to take you to the lab. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before but I didn’t want you to be mad and I didn’t know how to say it and I really really li-”

“Mike. It’s okay. We got there in the end.” Will was smiling wider than he had in over two years now, and Mike felt complete. Will grabbed his hand.

“Y’know, back in the shed in November, I heard you say it. I brushed it of but it took me by surprise, I’ve wondered ever since.”

“So that’s why you looked at me like that.”

#whooooo i did it #yay ok #time to tag this #byler #byeler #carson rambles #if yall enjoy this i can do more #i have more ideas

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finderskeepersff · 5 years

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35. Part 4

I am just in shock, like who the fuck does such a thing. How disgusting can you be, Sofia should have been in care I mean the fuck, Grace is a bad fucking parent “I love you” bringing Sofia’ hand up to my lips “I bled for so long, I didn’t start my period early. I was late, she said it was my period but it wasn’t. I just remember the little things now, he said to her I was better. Still, not once did she say what do you mean, she said I was the bad one when all I did was be born, I never understood why she hated me like that or saw me as competition when that was not me at all. I just wanted a mother, I was more of a mother to Leyton than she was but he turned deluded like her. Then you think why I wanted to move, I didn’t really think twice. I was happy to go, I didn’t really want to move with my friends because they had their own life. I didn’t trust any man to do this with, but with you. I was like I can trust him. When you love me, I don’t understand how. I am used, I did think you may want to make me feel ugly, you know. You never once pushed me to do anything, you was so different. You are so laid back, you let me take lead. You make me feel beautiful, you know. I have never had that, then just the love you hold for me. I don’t think I will ever want to see Samuel, he never saved me Cassius, you saved me. I think I would probably be stuck in that hole my friends wanted me out of. You don’t understand how much you have saved me from the moment you looked at me, from the time you asked me if I was ok outside your home. I am just feeling very numb, I don’t want to feel that” nodding my head, I bet she does feel that way right now “Sofia, what you have told me, it stays between us but I want you to accept that what happened to you, it was abuse and what happened to you was rape” Sofia plays around this, Sofia stared at me with her eyes filling up “you need to accept this for you and for us to move on, you’re excusing Grace. What she is to you is Grace Sofia, it was abuse and it started from a young age. This will never leave the room or even my mouth but Sofia, it’s hard to think of it. But your mother didn’t care for you, she did abuse you too” lightly touching Sofia’ cheek, a sharp sob left her lips as tears fell as she stared at me “you are stuck in this thought that your mother is good when she isn’t, come on baby” she is in denial, throughout this she has been.

Sofia stared at me, fighting back her tears “you need to open up baby, you need to do this. You have locked this up for so long and it hurts” Sofia nodded her head, she has to do this to move on because she still thinks her mom is ok and that she cares and she will care about her, I am tempted to tell her about her mom calling me but I won’t “will you think differently of me” in shaky tone she said “no, I want you to say this so you can close that chapter and you can accept what happened. Sofia, what happened to you was cruel. Even what happened to me does not touch your life. My god, someone took something away from you, your innocence was taken Sofia. Like I am so sad for you but I also want you to accept this so we can both move on together” Sofia nodded her head “this hurts” Sofia sobbed out crying, she is fighting herself so much but she is crying “I got you Sofia, it will hurt. It has to hurt for it to get better for you” hugging Sofia “I am here Sofia” it seems harsh but it will work out for her, she needs to accept in her heart and then she can maybe move on from Grace and not call her mom the way she does, Grace doesn’t deserve the love.

Watching Sofia wash her hands, she is feeling a little senstive and wants me to watch her. I even watched her pee and whatever “you know Sofia, ain’t shit changed with me. I still adore you to the moon and back, I love you Sofia. You just made me love you even more, you my queen. I got you, you got me. You tell me something I will do it” Sofia dried off her hands “really?” why she saying really like I wouldn’t “yes bub, you know that” she walked over to me “kill him for me” I had to pause right there and stare at Sofia “who?” I said in shock, blinking several times at her “you know who” Sofia is being dead ass “you know he got like five kids right?” I already know he gone but I want to know how far she would go “then his kids can feel what I feel, I want you to kill him. I want you to do it” I didn’t think I would ever hear the day Sofia telling me to do that “you’re hurt, don’t speak like that” grabbing Sofia’ hands and pulling her along out of the bathroom “he raped me Cassius” I stopped walking, she said it “look” letting her hands go, rubbing my face “there is an issue with that, trust me I would. I want too more than ever but someone did the job for me” Sofia furrowed her eyebrows “how?” I am a little shocked that Sofia really wanted me to kill but I would for her “Samuel did it” I said in a whisper “excuse me!?” Sofia spat “well what happened, he has been bugging. Since you said all of that he has been wanting to know who, what and when, so like he turned around and went to Leyton’ dad. He was talking some shit so he says, so then he said about your lips and straight away Samuel shot him. Which doesn’t bother me, it didn’t anyways but I just didn’t tell you because what is it to you. So yeah, he erm did it for me anyways” Sofia put her head down “he always said about my lips, everytime” I hate even thinking about that “I am sorry but I would do it for you, I would have killed for you, trust me baby” Sofia smiled at me lightly “I know you would have, I am so tired and drained. Can we go to sleep?” I didn’t really want to sleep but I can lay in bed I guess “come” least she can get some sleep.

Squeezing Sofia a little and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, she has her head rested on my chest, holding my body close “I love you Cassius and, I am so emotionally drained and tired. My head is hurting me, my eyes are sore. I am so thankful for my friends, imagine if they didn’t love me and also I wouldn’t be here for you. Like I am so happy we met when we did” I smiled staring up at the ceiling “yeah, I was thinking with my dick though. Like I came out of that place so fucking horny but I was so shook. Like you in that dress, it was a green dress and you had your hair up. I was like nah, Jordan that is your friend. I was so fresh out of jail and ready to beat his ass but you was there. I always wondered why you was a bottle service girl but not on my watch, you will always be treated like a queen. I want us to move on together, I want us to be happy. I want you to be ok, I know it will take a few days until things calm down and you can heal but I want to be there to heal you. I will always be here” I pray that I can be, I hope that don’t get shortend for me “you remember my dress colour and hair? Oh my god, but yeah. I was more thinking oh god, they are arguing. I could feel the tension, god you mean so much to me” I will never forget little things like that.

I managed to slip out of bed, I had to put a pillow there. She assumes someone is there but I ain’t even tired and also Kyle is coming, he has some money for me. I know it’s late night but the money arrived late so that is why, it’s amazing how much money you can make being this way in life. I wish it was a real life profession because I would be in the books “my nigga” dapping Kyle “what’s good bro? They all asleep?” closing the door behind him “yeah, it’s late. Come on now” Kyle placed the duffle bag on the floor “well it got dropped off, picked it up. Should be about two fifty” nodding my head “cool, you heard anything else about Samuel? He killing anyone else?” Kyle snorted laughing “he ain’t do anything else, just that he has been asking for you. I said look no, he called me. He said that please, I am sorry. He bugging, killing and shit” shaking my head “I know, well as long as that shit don’t fuck with my money I don’t care. Tell Ethan that Raphael needs to do a little publicity about the new club in Atlanta? Aight?” Kyle looked behind “Sofia, you good? Where was you today at the meet?” I swear I said don’t say shit, looking behind me “was busy” Sofia walked towards me “cool, I just miss Cassius so much, I had to give him a goodnight kiss” Kyle hit my shoulder, Sofia wrapped her arms around my torso “he loves me too much, speak soon ok?” I guess I better take my ass back to bed.

Closing the bedroom door “you don’t miss a thing huh? Woke up that fast” watching Sofia open the duffle bag “you can’t trick me by putting pillows there, try again” slowly walking over to Sofia “what you doing nosey?” ain’t nobody told her ass she can open anything “to look” she unzipped the duffle bag “but you ask permission for all that first” standing behind Sofia, the duffle bag is filled with money “it’s hard to comprehend that this is real, you made this?” she grabbed a few stacks out of the duffle bag “yeah, that is mine. This is from Brooklyn, you can have it, the whole duffle bag” Sofia turned to look at me frowning “I am being serious, this is for getting the home at the side of us done up. I bought it” Sofia turned her whole body to face me “what? Where was I when this happened?” I chuckled “here, so Wheezy is going to be protection, my right hand man here. The guy to watch over you when I can’t. I have to do this, I want to protect you. He will be around like Kyle and Myles, he is a good guy and you know that” now this is the Sofia I know, she wants to know “and what meeting happened?” looking at Sofia’ hands with the money still in them “Amira is being the face of the club, she is the owner” I will say it in the simple way “why can’t I do that?” I had to laugh, rubbing my face “you know why, I don’t want to be watched. You’re my wife that is why, don’t worry about it I got you. I am sure Amira will fill you in. So you want that money?” Sofia grinned holding the money up slowly over her face “can I get a new car?” snatching the money out of her hands “hell no, you drove me crazy about your car. You keep it” throwing the stack in the duffle bag “what if I wanted that whole money bag?” walking off towards the bathroom “then take it” I can just get another one.

I am happy that she is happy, I am happy she is smiling “come on, sleep” slapping her butt “I am, your mom is still awake. She just text me asking if I am ok, she said she has been worried” pulling the covers over me “yeah, she was upset. She is not bothered about knowing, she just didn’t want you sad. I am happy that you are in good spirits” watching Sofia place her phone down, turning onto my side “I want to move on, I think to know he is not here to be so smug kind of puts me at rest. I feel safe, I think I felt as if I could have lost you. I mean every man would look at me like shit but you, thank you. You made me feel secure, I think I just want to move on. You’re right, I have a lot of other people that make a family. You know” nodding my head as I propped my head up with my arm “it’s what you do Sofia, it’s natural to do this. It’s what a man would do but you still ain’t going to get a car out of me” she didn’t let me at first and kept complaining about it “I need to work on you then” Sofia said as she climbed onto the bed “Cassius Warren, thank you from me and baby Warren. We happy” I chuckled as she shuffled over to me “come on you, you need sleep” she is all smiles now, I think she was scared of how I would feel about it too but it don’t change anything.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfiction

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monster-ronpa · 6 years

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I hope you don't mind but can you write a imagine where Gonta met a Slime girl S/O for the first time please?

I hope you don’t mind me taking this request, it sounds really cute! ^_^

I hope you enjoy :)

- Mod Gundham

When Gonta heard of the liminal exchange programme, he was ecstatic!

Though he loved regular bugs, he was hoping to be able to study bug liminals too and attended the match up event with the intention of being a host family for one.

His cheeks were rosy on the way there, thinking about the bug monsters he could befriend. Would he come back with a mothman? Or maybe a mosquito girl? Or even an Oomukade? It could be something he hadn’t even heard of before!

He wondered if there where any beetle like monster folk. There must be, surely?

Eyes shining as he strode through the automatic doors of the convention centre, he made a bee line for the information desk, grabbing a leaflet to get ready to hunt down some bug friends. That was his original intention anyway.

“H-hey! Just because no one is going to pick you it doesn’t mean you can stop them picking me too! Get away from me, you’re disgusting!”

Gonta turned, curious to see what was going on, only for his eyes to widen in shock as he saw a beefy looking minotaur girl shove a smaller girl away from her, knocking her to the ground.

His inner gentleman demanded for him to act, causing him to rush over and kneel down, asking if the girl was ok.

It was only when she stared back with her bewildered orbs that he noticed she wasn’t so much flesh and bone, but a gloopy substance that had mainly been hidden in plastic wetsuit and raincoat.

“Me ok…” The girl blinked slowly as she tried to analyse Gonta’s face.

Gonta stared back in surprise. He had heard of slimes, but he hadn’t really considered them an option before, but looking at the one before him, he had to admit she was adorable.

“Here, let Gonta help you up.”

The slime girl said nothing, just watching him closely as he assisted her.

The minotaur who had knocked over the girl in the first place let out a huff as she gave a disapproving glare down her nose, turning as she rolled her eyes, muttering “Sure, YOU’RE the victim…” before stomping off.

“Are you ok? You’re not hurt?” Gonta ignored the minotaur, looking the slime girl up and down. Throughout their meeting, the slime girl had worn a somewhat blank expression, but at this question she seemed to look a little sad.

“Nobody wants to take s/o… They call s/o dumb and gross because s/o is a slime… S/o can’t even make friends with other monsters…”

Gonta frowned, feeling sorry for the slime.

“I don’t think s/o is gross… And people say that Gonta no smart boy too. It’s ok.” Gonta tried to reassure the dejected girl. It’s true he heard that slimes were renown for not being particularly bright, but he also knew that the had the capability to learn just as much as anyone else if people were patient enough.

“But no one will choose s/o… “

Gonta gave a small smile, not aware that the slime was likely smart than she let on as she twisted his arm.

“Well, how about you come home with Gonta? We can prove to people that we are smart, together!”

Though her expression largely remained the same, her glimmering eyes gave the girl’s thoughts away.

“Really?”

“Yes! Gentlemen never lie!”

After a brief pause of contemplation, the slime girl gazing up at Gonta’s face, a small smile pulled at her lips.

“I’m so happy!”

Although she wasn’t a bug, Gonta was more than pleased with his new companion, and they walked hand in hand to the registration counter. The speed at which his new friend filled out the form surprised him, but he felt his face flush a little with happiness at how enthusiastic she was. He couldn’t help but think how cute she was, and how he was looking forward to living with her from here on out. The pair of them would surely have many fun and love filled bug catching adventures ahead!

#gonta gokuhara #slime #drv3 imagines #drv3 boys #mod gundham

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theabominableblogger · 6 years

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My Reaction to “Gotham” S4E16

ONLY TWO MORE OF THESE TO GO, KIDDIES!

The rest of these reaction posts I’ll be uploading are not chronological order. They’re like that because A) college and B) more college.

My sister watched it with me (as well as the other episodes left in my epic “Gotham” reaction series) so my comments will be in bold, and hers will be in regular font. Author’s notes courtesy of me will be bolded and italicized.

Also, quick warning (and probably obligated to say this), we don’t like Barbara’s storyline.

AN: I managed to record our reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

*Lee shoots Sofia in the recap* Oooooohhh!!

But she’s not dead though, apparently!

*sighs* Nobody’s dead on this show...

And he’s [Jerome] alive!

*flatly* Was there any doubt.

Meanwhile, at Arkham Asylum...

*The Arkham guard turns on her Walkman* Oh, this is never a good idea...

*starts slow jamming out to "Fool For You” by Alice Smith*

Yeah headphones are required...

Ohhhh OK...

Because! *points excitedly at screen when Jervis appears*

*scoffs in hilarity when Jervis tries to talk to the guard, who can’t hear him*

What.

*gasps when one of the guards pops up behind the main guard*

“Tortuga! You almost gave me a heart attack!” Tortuga?

*shrugs cluelessly*

*Tortuga slices the guard’s neck* Ooooooohhhhhhh!!

Jesus God!

Jervis, I like your shorter hair much better.

Tortuga.... *claps hands* THE MOCK TURTLE!

OH MY GOD!

YEAH!

Wha- oh my God...

*jaw drops in excitement when we see Scarecrow*

[Jervis] I LOVE YOUR NEWSPAPER HAT!

That’s a different actor [playing Scarecrow]. That’s not Charlie Tahan.

*chuckles* He’s [Scarecrow] experimenting in his toilet.

Did he just put a whole bunch of that sodium stuff in his freaking toilet?

That thing is gonna get blown right off the wall in a matter of minutes.

I know!

*Scarecrow pours that crap on a lock* Holy shit!

That’s all you were doing with that?!?

*Cue Jerome* EEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Ohhh dear.

EEEEYYYYYY!!!

“When I [Jerome] say ‘three hairs past a freckle,’ gentlemen, I do not mean five hairs past.” *both immediately smile*

“Boys, boys, let’s not squabble too early in our partnership. There will be plenty of time to stab each other in the backs later!” *both chuckle*

“That’s the spirit, boys. Think big- and kinky.” *done*

“And lose the weirdo. She’s [Tortuga] giving me [Jerome] the heebie jeebies.” *trying her absolute damndest not to laugh*

*laughs* Stop calling us out!

*both yell in horror when Tortuga slices her own neck*

“Now, to free the rest of our cronies and blow this pop stand.” WELL DANG!

It’s “Popsicle stand,” you cretin.

*laughs* He don’t know that.

If you’re gonna insult me, do it properly.

WHO’S THE LOSER WITH THE DRUMS?!?

I KNOW, I LOVE THAT DUDE!!!

*both crack up at Jerome going down the aisle and making stupid faces at other inmates*

Ohhhhh, he’s great.

*jams out to opening theme*

“How many got out?” “87. The entire violent ward.” *jaw drops in shock*

“Yeah, we’ve rounded up most of the serious nutjobs; they’re the guys that think they’re walruses or what not.” *both immediately do finger guns at screen*

EEEEEEYYYYYYYY....

Any carpenters in there?

Please tell me there’s gonna be more Benedict Samuel. Two minutes of that guy, and I already love him.

*chuckles*

Like he’s not the Jervis Tetch I know and love, but he’s entertaining as hell.

He’s very good!

Yeah, Benedict Samuel’s real voice sounds nothing like that. It’s like stereotypically British. But not Cockney, just British.

AN: WHAT?!?! HE’S ACTUALLY FROM AUSTRALIA?!?

*smiles*

“All right, listen up! If I’d [Jim] have known I’d be seeing your ugly mugs tonight, I’d have stayed in the hospital.” *both chuckle*

Ben McKenzie directed this episode, I forgot!

I take it that means we’re in for a good one.

AN: Yes.

“Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim!” *laughs*

JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM JIM

“Do it, OR I’M [Jervis] GONNA KILL SOMEONE! In case you have any doubts.” *both crack the hell up*

I shouldn’t be... God, he’s good!

“Let’s go.” Here we go go go go gooooo!

"You [Jim] said we had to have each other’s backs tonight, right?” Yes!

“So what, we’re [Jim and Harvey] either idiots, or we’re hypnotized? Good choices.” *both laugh*

Oh please tell me this is the episode with Harvey being awesome.

Uh, that’s the next episode.

AAAAUUUUUGGGHHHH!!!

*Jervis meets Jim with a hypnotized couple* SON OF A BITCH!

Who the hell are they?!?

*so done* A random married couple! Because in the previous season, Jervis was all like “Oh, Jim, what are you worried about? Your love life?!?” and I’m like “SHUT UP!”

“Lo and behold! The bold Captain Jim Gordon, and his rusty caboose in tow.” *chuckles* ‘Rusty caboose in tow...’

*giggles*

Dude, look at that scarf [that Jervis wears]!

Do you recall when I [Jervis] first came to this fair city, Jim? A bawling mess, wanting nothing more than to address the safety of my dear sister Alice?” :/

“You gave me NO CHOICE!” *tries not to laugh at the SUDDEN YELLING*

“I was willing to give you any life you wanted, just to keep you out of mine.”

*Jervis gives the command to drop the wrecking ball* Ooohhh..

Oh shit-

*both yell and reel back in absolute horror when the couple gets squashed*

*both still in :O for a good minute or so*

He [Jervis] drives off! *laughs*

I DON’T KNOW WHAT THE HELL I JUST SAW!

That just killed the moment, just him randomly driving off.

I don’t know what the hell I just saw!

I don’t know either.

That was kinda awesome! I’m not gonna lie!

*Bruce and Selina enter the precinct* Yaaay!

The dynamic duo.

Yaay!

*laughs* She [Selina] just growled at him [Bruce]!

Ooooohhhh I like that [Barbara’s] office.

I like her hair.

Season 4: the season of Booze ™ !

*chuckles*

There’s just so much booze in this season!

*sings* Alcohol... my per-ma-nent accessory...

*mouths while aggressively pumping hand holding phone in air* Shots shots shots shots!

[Barbara] Don’t mix pills with booze. Don’t do that.

“He [Ra’s] brought me [Barbara] back to life. We’d never even met. Why choose me?” Because he brought you back to life?!?

Are you two [Barbara and Tabitha] still going out or like what? What’s the situation here?

*shrugs* I guess...

What’s the situation here?

Friends with benefits?

I guess...

*chuckles* I don’t know...

*gasps when we get a flashback of Barbara’s death in S3*

Oh shit!

WHY HER THOUGH?!? That is my question!

That’s a great shot though [of Ra’s reviving Barbara], I have to say.

What the hell...

*Ra’s brings out the Lazarus water* Oooo-oohhhhhhh...

Is that from the Lazarus pit?!?

I think that’s from the Lazarus pit! Yeah, ‘cause it’s like a neon color in this show!

Oh my God!

*Ra’s revives Barbara* There we go. That explains it.

So you can drink in it rather than bathe in it in this continuity.

Yeah. I mean, you can do both.

*Barbara is resurrected* Ohhh!

Oh shit!

“Oh, what a vital, poisonous little mind you [Barbara] have. And yet, everybody hates you for it, don’t they?” I don’t think that’s why they hate you.

“You are just the one I’ve been looking for.” :/

“You [Barbara] shall become the Demon’s Head. The League of Shadows will be yours to command, an army of assassins.” *rubs head in frustration* Ohhhh, are we doing this again... ohhh....

They’re not talking “Oh, Dark Knight!” That’s later.

[Ra’s] You’re gonna hand the League of Assassins over to her [Barbara]?!?

I know, I don’t like it either.

WHy?!?

I don’t know.

That sounds stupid.

“I’m [Barbara] OK.” No you’re not.

*The remnants of the married couple* Oh my God.. those are just dummy parts sticking out of the bottom!

I mean, it was effective.

Yeah.

It was hella effective!

It was very effective!

“Midnight, right? That’s less than an hour.” Midnight? Why is it always midnight? *chuckles*

*shrugs*

“’Fliers become die-rs.’” It’s like in “Lovers and Madmen.” He rigged all of those people to jump to their deaths.

Ohhhhhhhhh!!

*slaps knee* And it’s like in “Mad as a Hatter” [in Batman: The Animated Series], when he told those guys to jump in the river!

*gasps* Yeaahhhhh! Oh my gosh!

AN: Also, I highly recommend the comic “Lovers and Madmen.” Different interpretation of the Joker but still pretty solid and also quotable.

*wheezes when Bruce tries to give Detective Harper money to protect him*

*tries not to laugh when Bruce starts to fake cry*

*laughs when Bruce pulls a Stealth Hi-Bye on Harper*

Bruuucceee!

*gasps and claps hands* His [Jervis’s] theme in the background!

*jaw drops when it’s revealed that a lot of rooftops are lined by people ready to jump*

Ohhhhhh shit.

“Your ego, Bruce. It’s huge.” *tries not to laugh*

“Get over yourself. It’d make you a little easier to be around.” *both try not to laugh*

Oh...

Oh shit!

Oh... oh-

*Bruce ends up opening the door for Selina instead* Oh.

*groans in frustration*

That’s not a hug, I’m just getting the door for ya! *laughs*

*both laugh at Selina’s little giggle*

That little giggle, oh my God!

“You don’t owe me [Bruce] anything, Selina. You never did.” You two are adorable!

They’re cute!

“Geez, there’s a lot of gum under here!” *chuckles*

*whispers* What?

Ew no no no-

Oh no no-

*both yell loudly in disgust when Jerome eats some ABC gum*

You are crazy!

*chuckles*

“Jim, it’s happening all over the city. Thousands are climbing up roofs!” How many people are in this freaking city?!?

Probably at least a couple thousand, I’d say.

“He [Jervis] must’ve commanded them [the drivers] to change the station so that we couldn’t find him.” How complicated are these commands? It’s like explaining Kilgrave’s powers. Did he tell them to do that or...

“Ugh, it’s that song I [Harvey] hate!” *chuckles*

*jams out and sings along with “Foolish Pride” by LAB*

“Just right!” Oooh, broccoli cheddar [soup] though. Good choice.

“Mamma Mia!” *both start singing “Mamma Mia”*

“What was the special ingredient again? Ah, right. It was my [Jerome’s] hand. The one you [Uncle Zach] dipped in a boiling pot of chicken stock!” *both bug eyes*

“That smell, it was ...mouthwatering....” *shakes head in disgust*

You are disgusting, dude!

“I [Zach] set out three bowls of soup, nephew, so I’d have enough for all my guests.” [Crap]

*small gasp when the strong man drags Jerome out of the booth*

Ooh shit!

“The ‘just right’ soup is for him. The ‘cold’ is for me! I always loved gazpacho! The ‘too hot,’ that’s for you, nephew.” Ohhh shit!

Oh he’s gonna heat it again! Damn!

*jaw drops when the microwave starts shorting out*

Isn’t this the Iceberg?!?

No, it’s her [Barbara’s] lounge.

The Sirens, right?

Yeah.

*All the lights go out* Ooooooohhhhh!

Shit!

“We’re [the League] here for the Demon’s Head. Where is he?” “She.... is right here.” I call bullshit.

It’s a flashlight. I could make a joke out of that but I’m not going to.

*gasps when Hypnotized!Harvey knocks out Jim*

“Hickory, dickory, dock. The copper went up the clock. The clock struck 12, he fell pell-mell, and that was it for the cop.” *in unison* Noooooooooooooo.....

Ohhh dear.

*Zachary takes out the boiling soup for Jerome* Oh no.

*gasps when Zachary prepares to pour the boiling soup on Jerome*

“Here, nephew, have a taste of one of my three soups!” *in shock* Roll credits!

AN: The name of the episode actually came from in the writers’ room. Tze Chun came in having ordered 3 soups and Charlie Huston (the writer of this episode) said “I’m gonna put that in the script” and Tze Chun went “Yeah, right.” Welp.

*both yell in horror when Zachary pours the soup down Jerome’s throat*

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

OOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!! [Jerome] You’re gonna have welts all over your face for a month, dude!

“No one deserves that.” “You tell ‘em!” *both have to stifle a laugh*

That is a very Joker moment, I have to say.

“Let him [Jerome] go... and get rid of the kid [Bruce].” *bug eyes*

*Bruce throws a bunch of plates at the strong man* Ohhhh shit!

Did he just No-Sell a porcelain plate to the face?!?

Yeah, he just did!

*both jaws drop in horror when Jerome finds the gallon of bleach meant for him*

He [Zach] was gonna poison his nephew!

“She’s [Barbara] got the Demon’s Head. Ra’s chose her.” “She doesn’t even know what it is.” Fair point.

I don’t know what that haircut is.

Whose haircut?

That dude’s!

He doesn’t have any hair!

Exactly!

“Women serve in the League, but they do not lead.” “That’s now a law, just a stupid tradition. Ra’s chose her. We need to honor his choice.” Barbara’s like “Yes, random lady, I accept you!”

*gasps when Barbara takes out the male League member who tried killing her first*

“Anyone else want a shot at the title?” Everybody does.

“Here comes the airplane!” *tries not to laugh*

“Got it. Lost it. Write it down!” Me in school.

*giggles when Jerome looks over at Bruce still fighting and does a quick second of fake shadow boxing*

*Jerome kills Zach* :(

“Boy billionare Bruce Wayne, my [Jerome’s] savior! Wow, I did not see that one coming.” *both chuckle*

“Really makes a man wonder... what the hell is wrong with you?!?” :[

*sighs* Ohhh dear...

*claps hands when Jim finds Jervis at the radio station* Let’s go!

How is he doing the whole hypnotizing thing?

It was over the radio.

Yeah, I know, but what does he use to do it?

He has a ticking mechanism.

Oh. Does he always keep that on him or what?

He always has that [pocket watch] on him. He goes “Look into my eyes and listen.”

Wait, if they can’t look into his eyes, then-

It’s the noise.

Oooohh kay.

It’s the stimuli.

*both yell and reel back in horror when Jim shoots Jervis’s hand*

What the hell was that for?!?

OK, here’s the thing: he [Jervis] got shot in the freaking hand!

And it’s like nothing!

I will say though, the rhyming integrated in with the dialogue is done really well!

*in unison when Selina comes to save the day* EEEEEYYYYYY!!!

*Bruce finally knocks out the strong man* Oooohhh.

“Selina, huh? Well isn’t that a nice name...” Go to hell.

*Selina pulls a gun on Jerome* Ohhh.

“Uh, uh, uh. She’s not that kind of girl.” Wanna bet?

“Oh, all right! See you crazy kids later! Ciao!” *both crack up*

“Ra’s chose me [Barbara] for a reason, I know it.” Looks like he was playing you for a stooge.

“You’re all so damn weak. That’s it. That is why Ra’s chose me. Because he knew I would see how pitiful you all are. Afraid of change.” Yeah, that’s gonna endear you to them.

*bug eyes when the lights suddenly go out and gunfire ensues*

Shhiit!

Whaaaaaat?!?

What the hell is going on?

*The midnight bells go off* Oooohhhh...

Noooo... nooooo....

Noooo.... we’re not doing this... noooo....

*both freak out in unison when the jumpers get ready*

*both freeze when there’s absolute radio silence*

“It worked!” *both let out a huge sigh of relief*

That was good. That was damn good!

*both giggle when the DJ gives Jim a thumbs up*

*Jim lets out a sigh of relief* Same.

*Jim and Harvey enter the captain’s office* That requires... some booze! No, I’m kidding.

I’d want some booze after that.

OK, yeah.

“You [Jim] need a drink.” *waves hand toward screen in agreement*

“Squirrels hide nuts for the winter. I [Harvey] got this for whenever.“ EEEEYYYYYYYY!!!

The hell is that?

BOOOOOOZZEE!

*both giggle*

That looks like scotch.

No, that’s whiskey. Like Fireball whiskey. See, Harvey’s the hard drinker.

Yeah. Gordon looks like he’s getting used to it.

He’s like “It’s dull. Whatever.” *pretends to take a shot* It’s like Steve Rogers.

As long as it’s alcohol.

For glory, for justice-

*in unison* -for sweet, sweet booze!

“[Jim] You know what I [Harvey] was thinking when I jumped in that car and I was flicking through those channels? I was thinking ‘I can do this crazy thing. ‘Cause if it goes sideways, Jim Gordon will save me.” *both smile*

“Feet of clay are heavy to carry around. That’s what the whiskey’s for.” *softly chuckles*

“There are no heroes here.” I will clink to that!

“Got the Wayne kid on line three. Something about Valeska.” Oh dear.

“I’ll see you at St. Ignatius, Jim. You can yell at me [Bruce] there.” *softly* Hoooooooo.... hoo hoo....

“Kid in trouble again?” “More than he can handle.” Summary of the show.

They put a mouthguard on him [Jervis]!

At least somebody’s gotta shut him up.

*Scarecrow douses a guard with fear toxin* AAAAYYYYYYY!!!

Scarecrow!

*Jerome in his final costume* EEEEEYYYYY!!

“How do you like the new threads?” I like ‘em a lot!

Those are awesome!

*gasps and points excitedly at Scarecrow’s new costume*

“We have fish to fry. And by fish, I mean faces... or feet... ah, something fun to fry!” *laughs*

Man, he [Jerome] looks so good. So does Scarecrow!

I know! Everyone looks great!

Scarecrow looks amazing!

“ALL ABOOOOAAARRDD!” Hey look, the Joker hijacks another truck!

And that’s the end of the episode!

Man, that was awesome!

#Gotham #gotham spoilers #one of my three soups #the blogger reacts #jervis tetch #jerome valeska #jonathan crane #scarecrow #jim gordon #harvey bullock #selina kyle #bruce wayne #barbara kean #ra's al ghul #tabitha galavan #ben mckenzie #benedict samuel #looked at the stars and considered a reaction #q post

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boyswanna-be-her · 7 years

Text

goretober: eyes

“For fuck’s sake, Jeff, put the glasses back on before somebody sees you.”

I hate the way my voice hisses but it gets the job done and Jeff fumbles to push the sunglasses back up the bridge of his nose. I do a quick sweep around the restaurant and nobody seems to have seen what I just saw.

I mean. Shit. There’s no way that I even saw what I just saw. So for now I’m not going to try and deal with it. But I do have to be back at work in--oh, Christ--forty minutes.

“What do you want me to do with this information?” I ask.

I spot our server before Jeff has a chance to answer and I flag her down as politely and urgently as possible. In a voice that I struggle to keep businesslike, I order a whiskey double. Yes, neat.

“What do you mean what do I want you to do?” Jeff asks. So, he’s still as useless as he was the last time I saw him face to face. What a plot twist.

I picture what’s sitting behind those mirror-tint aviators and shiver, instinctively fighting it, trying not to show it because I don’t want Jeff to know that I’m creeped out.

That’s right. I’m worried about hurting this guy’s feelings. The person who texted me abruptly and begged for lunch in the middle of my work week, only to show up with his… freaky bug eyes. Whatever it is I just saw.

I’m going to be talking about this hallucination in therapy for months, and I’m the one worrying about making him uncomfortable.

“I mean, isn’t this something you ought to be talking to your family about?” I say, desperately trying to set boundaries weeks too late, as usual. “Or, I don’t know…”

“I don’t have anybody. I don’t know who to call.” He shakes his head as he says it.

I lose control of my mind and the image of his eyes flashes back into my imagination. Do you think those bug eyes can even cry now?

Fuck, fuck. Don’t think this shit.

Jeff is looking at me like I’m his last hope on earth.

Fuck. I know full well that Jeff has no goddamned friends in town. That’s half the reason I ended up hooking up with him in the first place and one hundred percent of the reason why I terminated things pretty quickly from there. I could tell I was going to be nothing but a security blanket to this half-grown kid. Maybe that sounds frosty--and maybe it is--but I like to tell myself I was doing the best thing for both of us.

Kid like this needs friends--not a fuck buddy from hell like me.

The waitress arrives with my bottom shelf whiskey. I let her get a few paces away and throw my stupid shifty eyes all around the room to make sure no one is watching before I throw back the enormous shot and gulp it in one go, conspicuous as fuck.

I don’t bother trying to look cool. I suck down sweet tea to wash away the paint thinner taste until I can no longer feel the burn in my throat.

Fuck you Jeff. Fuck this freaky bullshit.

How am I going to go back and write website copy in 36 minutes from now? My sites-per-hour rate is going to be in the absolute garbage today. As usual, another stupid boy costs me money.

“Francis? Will you please say something?”

“The fuck is it like?” I ask desperately.

Or rather, the big shot of whiskey that kicked in just in time asks. The voice doesn’t even sound like me.

Jeff snorts and shakes his head and for the first time since he met me in this grimy sushi hellhole, I remember why I slept with him in the first place. When he’s not so busy being insecure and getting in his own way, he can be kind of cute.

When I broke it off, I thought, Someday somebody’s gonna break his heart and give him some real angst. I wish he’d call me then.

Well, the human being across from me just lowered his sunglasses to reveal a pair of bug eyes--or alien eyes or… who the fuck knows? I’m not drunk enough for this.

But I do know that whatever it is, Jeff has a real reason to angst now.

There’s no way I’m gonna fall for this particular broken boy though. Christ. What a nightmare.

“Would you believe me if I said it was absolutely exquisite?” Jeff asks. I’ve already forgotten that I asked a question.

“No fucking way.”

“It’s lovely. It’s… I don’t know how to even begin to explain.”

His posture sags and one corner of his mouth crooks up. It sounds like he’s talking about the love of his life--not some inexplicable mutation or morph-ation or whatever it is that he says has been slowly transforming his human eyes into segmented, multifaceted insect eyes over the course of two weeks as he fretted about it, alone in his depressing apartment.

He hasn’t shaved in a few days and he looks exceptionally tired. He has no right to look this good right now. It’s so weird that this is suddenly doing it for me. What the fuck is my damage.

“Do you see a million of me right now?”

I wave my hand a few inches from his face and Jeff jolts backwards. “Please don’t do that.”

“My bad.”

“No. It’s not like movies. It’s more like seeing a pixelated screen.”

“Christ. I’m picturing Minecraft. Please tell me I’m wrong.”

“You’re completely wrong,” he says, tilting his head back. “It’s like everything I see is a painting. Things don’t flow together the way they did before, and I find myself… pulling back. Does that make sense?”

I shake my head, no. “That’s okay, though.”

“I’m seeing the world differently--”

“Yeah, no shit--”

“I don’t mean the eyes. It forces my brain to work in another way--like it’s building a whole new structure in there. I feel like these entirely new parts of my mind are lighting up and growing to compensate for… whatever it is that’s happening. I feel better than I did before.”

Does he seriously kind of have a boner for this? Gross.

“Then what’s the problem?”

“What if someone finds out? What if they want to study me? What if--if there’s something wrong with me, Francis?”

Oh Jeff, baby, you’re a white boy at a landlocked sushi joint with a dating app hookup who ended it after three goes and occasionally sends you a pity LOL when you pester me with memes via text. There’s plenty wrong with you even before the bug eyes enter the equation.

Fuck. Whiskey makes me such an asshole.

“Does it hurt?” I ask, veering off topic wildly because I know my lunch hour is ticking down and this particular brand of hallucination is at least more entertaining than the weird half-buzzed dissociating I’m sure I’m going to be doing at my desk all afternoon.

He winces. “It didn’t at first.”

Shit. I didn’t expect him to say it hurt. Goddamn it, I’m starting to care about this.

“But they’re growing. I think. It’s hard to tell. I don’t know if I’m being a hypochondriac or if they’re really starting to bulge more than a normal human eye would. I feel… enormous pressure in my head. And sometimes it’s like theres--like there’s something--I don’t know--moving and I started taking decongestants a few days ago. It’s really hard for me to focus my eyes on an image of… my eyes. You know?”

I nod stupidly. Of course I have no clue. Did he say there is something moving in his fucking skull?

“Do you want me to… check if I think they’re bulging?” I gulp sweet tea as if steeling myself for this. I hate to admit to myself that I kind of want to see them again.

He shrugs and sighs and obviously wants to say yes but doesn’t want to admit that he wants it.

Fuck, this is exactly like our first hookup. I hate this fucking asshole.

“OK, let me look.”

“You seriously don’t have to.”

On that first night, I ended up telling him, “I’m not going to beg you to suck your cock.”

I contemplate saying the same thing today but I’m pretty sure he’s distracted enough not to remember.

“Whatever, I know I don’t have to. Just let me see.”

I lean over the table, careful not to dip my tie in the tiny bowl of soy sauce, and Jeff leans in too. He lowers the glasses to rest on the tip of his nose and tilts his head up just so.

He’s got skin like a fucking marble statue, I think for a split second before I remember the problem at hand.

Closer, here in the light, the eyes look less like a dark, terrifying void. Or maybe it’s just that I’m semi-prepared to see them this time, now that I know what I’m getting into. Or maybe it’s that I’m halfway into talking myself into blowing him again, just for the hell of it.

The eyes sit in his sockets just like a normal human eye would. But instead of the white sclera, the corneas, the pupils--all the normal jazz we know and love about the windows of the soul, staring out from his smooth, pale skin are two eyes the texture of a housefly’s.

Under the buzzing suspended light, their surface bursts and spirals out into fluorescent kaleidoscopic patterns, glittering in an oilslick rainbow. I’m torn between thinking of my sister’s most coveted nail polish named, aptly, “Demon Unicorn Shit,” and my own memory of the last time someone talked me into thinking that dropping acid would be a fun Thursday night activity.

They’re kind of lovely, I think. Christ, I could slap myself.

When Jeff blinks over them, it looks painful and clearly takes a lot of effort. His blink is slow and audible, like the sound of someone with drymouth parting their lips. I shiver again and he notices, sitting back and pushing the sunglasses quickly back up the bridge of his nose.

Oh god, he’s so damaged. I’m absolutely going to end up getting involved in this shit. I could hang myself.

“Sorry,” he says. “It’s disgusting.”

I snort and shake my head. “I was actually thinking they were kind of pretty.”

“Francis, don’t tease me,” he says, shaking his head and sounding miserable.

“I really was. Thinking they weren’t so scary, I mean. I wouldn’t pull your leg right now.”

He won’t look up at me.

“What am I going to do?”

Christ, he’s pitiful. The whiskey is sitting warm at the base of my skull. The whiskey says, Weren’t you just slumping in your beige cube, wishing that life would hand you an adventure--even if it was a terrible one?

Aren’t you dying for something different, even if it’s gruesome?

I let the whiskey do what it wants for a moment, slipping my nice leather shoe forward under the booth table, sliding our bare ankles together.

Cool relief floods my chest when my skin meets the warm skin of another human. I don’t know what I’d expected. Tarantula hair? Spiny barbs? An exoskeleton?

No, this is pathetic, sweet Jeff. Not some overgrown housefly. It’s Jeff who needs my help. Me. Specifically, Francis.

I sigh and put my hand face up on the table. Jeff doesn’t understand at first, and by the tilt of his head, I can tell he’s looking from my palm to my eyes and then back again. I wiggle my fingers in a completely un-suave way of enticing him.

After a moment, he understands and slips his palm over mine. I grasp his hand, warm and dry, and look at my own reflection in his sunglasses.

I realize that I’m not going back to work and wonder when, exactly, I made that decision.

Maybe I didn’t make the decision. Maybe I just know better than to fight it when I can feel my entire life changing because I decided not to ghost this guy today. Maybe it’s the manic thrill of finding a new and novel way to fuck everything up.

I should drop him at the ER and run in the opposite direction. I should call out sick and check myself into an ER.

And instead, I’m about to pick up the check for sushi and… Damn it, this isn’t even my adventure. I didn’t work this hard to be a fucking sidekick.

“Everything’s gonna be OK, Jeff.” My voice doesn’t belong to me. It’s strong and cool like an ancient river. “We’ll figure this thing out.”

I swallow hard and flag the server down for another double with my free hand.

#goretober #cw insect imagery #cw sex mention #cw flippant suicide joke #cw narrator is a giant NB asshole #body horror #sorry i forgot the body horror tag for like two hours christ

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randomnessunicorn-imagine · 7 years

Note

US+SF+UF+UT Gaster reacting to one day coming home to see his SO asleep on the couch with wings made of chitin(it's what makes up most of a bugs wings, like butterflies, bees, dragonflies, ect) When SO wakes up and is asked about it, they freeze a moment, their wings tensing closer to them before slowly explaining that they are delicate and easily damaged, and didn't show him to avoid risking any damage done to them, and that SO didn't want to risk loosing him in case he thought they were ugly.

{ Aww~I’m happy to receive some asks about other characters that are not the skelebros, I love them –don’t let me be misunderstood- but I think every characters deserve love ~Then, I don’t know very well his Swap and SF version but I tried anyway -! And send me more asks about Gaster, he’s cool and I had so much fun writing this-! }

⊰ Tale! Gaster ⊱

You were the one who saved him from the misery he lived when he was into the void.He has never believed in miracles, God or angels, in any religion since he was a scientist and scientists could not believe in those irrational and fancy things. This would be crazy.From the first time he saw you, he felt a strange feeling he has never felt in his life. Something brand new, magical and special. You gave to him life back. Like he saw the light of Heaven because you appeared just like an angel in his eyes and he has always thought you were too special for this world. These last days, Gaster worked so much in his lab and he ignored you, because science has always been his true and eternal love even if he loved you so much in the same way, but sometime his passion got the best of him without realizing. You knew it and you have never complained this behaviour of his, this was one of the reasons he adored you.He realized he ignored you a bit much and he wanted to apologise to you because he thought he was not the mate you deserved and he had to spend more time with you.The moment he came back home hearing only the sound of the clock. Tick tock. No other sound, it was quite sad. He did not call your name, he just searched for you until he found you laying on the couch. When he noticed your wings, he remained enchanted. He could have never imagined something so beautiful. You were just like a terrestrial angel for him, but you were a real angel. He could not believe his eyes. Maybe he was dreaming.You were so scared and worried for reasons he could not understand and he felt sad and guilty because he knew it was his fault. He neglected you this period and he was unpardonable. You explained to him that you felt uncomfortable with your wings and they were so delicate and you were afraid he could find you disgusting since they seemed bugs wings. Gaster just smiled at you sweetly, walking up to you with his slow steps. Caressing your forehead, he assured you that you were perfect the way you were and your wings were so beautiful and extraordinary. He could never hate you, he thought he was the one to be hated. It was pretty funny and strange. He kissed your forehead telling he loved you so much with his timid voice because it was a thing he was not used to say, asking for your forgiveness because he was not so present in your life. You had nothing to worry because he was not going to leave you because of your wings. It was something so marvellous.

⊰ Fell! Gaster ⊱

Science was his true and real love and so many times he asked himself why you were his mate. It was an illogical mystery for him. Sometime he ignored this fact, keeping living his days with this unsolved mystery but, other times, he wondered why he could love a mere and simple human like you. He spent hours thinking about it, observing you with his cynical and scrutineer orbs while you were doing your jobs. Why? It was the most annoying question mark. It was so frustrating for a scientist not to understand something so simple. He was going crazy. You could see he was mad to you for something but you have never asked for an explication so the two of you ignored to each others. Gas was an egocentric and cold person who thought only to himself, he did not care even about Sans and Papyrus, and he did not consider them like his children or worthy of his consideration. Sometime, he said they were not his real sons but only two spoiled and annoying kids he decided to take care of because he felt particular generous in that moment of his life. At first, he started dating you only because he pitied you and he wanted to use you like his personal guinea pig for his eccentric experiments. Then, he strangely forgot this idea seeing you like a “not so bad” company. He had to discover the reason why he felt that way for you and he was sick and tired of this confusion that did not make him sleep at night and that was driving him mad.One day, Gas decided to come home earlier than his usual because he wanted to have a conversation with you, maybe he would have understood the reason why he found you more interesting than the other living organisms.The moment he opened the door, seeing you sleeping on the couch his soul missed a beat, and he felt a strange warmth inside his body even if it was not new. This was another question mark. Then, when he noticed your wings, he got curious and he desired to know what those wings were and where they came from since he has never seen them on you before. His imagination was exploring weird places of perversion and he wanted to study your new nature but your voice landed him into the reality and those horrible desires vanished instantly. You were afraid because you thought Gas was mad at you for have hidden your wings, like you lied to him about your real nature but you were only ashamed of yourself. When you explained to him your feelings, he could not understand even if he was incapable to say something sweet and comforting.Actually, Gas did not act mad like you thought; his voice was not that rude even if he was still serious. He told that he did not care you had wings or anything else. It was ok, that made you different from other humans. If you truly hated your wings he could have taken them off through a surgery, it was quite painful but if they made you uncomfortable. Don’t be worry, Gas did not want to hurt you, since he did not want to use you for his experiments, anymore.The next day you would notice his behaviour changed, he appeared less rude and maybe he realized the sentiment he felt for you was not pity or curiosity, but something else he was still incapable to confess you.

⊰ Swap! Gaster ⊱

He has always been a weird man since he was the river man with the right mystery around him. Nobody knew his true identity, maybe you were the only one since you were always kind and sweet with him, sharing to him the lunches you bought to Muffet’s, listening to all his particular quotes and he was happy for this. You were his favourite human and company, his only company. Gasty loved so much bringing you to his boat singing you songs about the Underground or simple stories and fables because they were amusing and he felt so relaxed by your side. You made his life worthy and less boring.Even his job like as gondolier was getting better since so many people wanted to join him in his boat trips, driving everyone in the Underground. He became friendlier than before thanks to you, he did not care if he appeared less mysterious, since it was great to be happy.The day he came back home seeing you so sad and exhausted, he could not believe you were so tired and he suddenly approached you asking for an explication. Then, he noticed your wings and he realized he was not the only mysterious creature here and he felt nicely shocked, he laughed slightly. Then, you explained to him that you hated your wings because they appeared so weak and ugly, they were just like insect’s wings and this fact was so gross for you. Gasty did not think your wings were weird, they were so beautiful and you should have been proud being so special and gorgeous. He was sure everybody would congratulate to you and you had no reasons to hide them. He was so cold and suspicious before he met you, you helped him so much to become a better person and now he desired helping you with this problem because the things people considered flaws usually were not.

⊰ SwapFell! Gaster ⊱

You were an odd person. Really the oddest person alive if you wanted to spend your precious time with him, the weirdest gondolier of the Underground, actually he was the only gondolier here (and he was enough for now).Gassy could not understand why you enjoyed so much his stories that he found quite boring and a lot of them were real scary and you should have the taste of macabre if you kept listening to his horror stories, wow-! He was impressed but he has never manifested his curiosity to you, he always treated you with indifference and rudeness but you came back to him anyway and everyday so he got used to your presence. You were his greatest client –and he did not have so many customers since he had a bad reputation and everyone felt uncomfortable on his boat. Some legends said that some of his customers have never came back and they disappeared into the river, eaten by the mysterious creatures that lived there. Gassy was the one who loved to narrate these stories saying he only fed the beasts that lived in the waters of the Underground. It was one of his duties, but it was just a legend you did not believe. You thought he had a big imagination and it was so funny.When he saw you laying on the couch so weak and lifeless he thought the worst… Not that he cared about you but it was strange since you were the bright and amusing person here, not him. Then, he noticed your wings and he did not know what to think about it, maybe they were fake and you wanted to play some game with him…? A sort of role-playing even if he was too old for it. You woke up confused and alarmed because you did not want him to see your wings, they were your misery and shame. You explained to him your fear but he told you that he would have left you before, even without wings, but he was still here for reasons unknown for him and you were not that bad. You were good enough and your wings were not a problem for him, but maybe someone could have found them weird but he was ready to feed his lovely marine monsters with their wicked flesh.

#randomnessunicorn-imagine #anonymous #ask #undertale headcanons #undertale scenarios #undertale #underfell #underswap #fellswap #swapfell #gaster #w.d. gaster #undertale gaster #underfell gaster #underswap gaster #swapfell gaster #imagines #x reader #winged reader

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pinksweatergettingbetter · 7 years

Text

warning, the following has mainly snarky (and possibly furious) opinions on Spirit of Justice. Reader discretion is advised.

Alright, on to part three, where Phoenix’s big fat mouth gets Apollo and Athena into deep doodoo.

QUICK CHILDREN, INTO THE MANHOLE!

SDUFGDGSF YOU CAN ‘MOVE’ WHILE YOURE BEING CHASED

way to ruin the moooooood XD

well athena if its any consolation, smelling like a rotten egg will probably delight sadmad.

y’know. cause youre a putrid egg yolk.

“Once a rebel, always a rebel!”

apollo was never a rebel

you sent him back to America before he could do any rebelling.

>OH MY SNARK IS CONFIRMED BY APOLLO

oh everyone’s met up now

“It was like watching a pair of ostriches bury their heads in the sand”

the FUCK does that mean, Phoenix?!???

“dubious hovel”

whats wrong with athena? i thought she was huddling up in the corner because she saw something unnerving, then maybe because of all the sudden people there–– but it’s implying she’s disgusted by the shitty state of the place?

what, is Athena a germaphobe now??

“He said he hopes you’ll come back and take over this office someday.”

“M-me?”

“Those were his words! He might have been half-joking though.”

I’m not sure which I’m more offended by; the fact that Dhurke still assumed Apollo would make a shit lawyer, or the fact that Apollo does indeed take over. Spoilers. Haha.

“must’ve been because of you, dhurke!”

no it was because of Phoenix Wright because he was a cool guy, once upon a time. also because, unlike every other lawyer in the gotdamn series, Apollo just really friggin loves the law. He thinks lawyers are legit cool and he wanted to be one because he just happened to have a passion for litigating. He’s not a prop in your stupid story, he’s his own interesting person.

“Dhurke was never a hands-on kinda dad...”

you can motherfucking say that again, vore machine.

“...but not a day went by that he wasn’t thinking of ya. That much I’m sure of.”

yeah he sure was

thinking of the favours he could one day ask of him.

“Doesn’t get more paternal than that!”

Athena, you don't even have a dad. Your opinion on the subject is completely worthless.

“(Dhurke... And to think, I really did spend my days trying to forget you...)”

god apollo you don’t deserve this. you deserve trucy and klavier and thalassa (being an actual mom for once) HELL you deserve your ACTUAL, REAL DAD.

“The victim’s passport and any pictures of him were burned up in the fire. Without knowing his real name, no divination seance could be performed.”

So you’re telling me Jove brought every single glossy of himself into that blaze? And after the fire, nobody bothered checking the dental records on the corpse/asking where that neato musician from the other night went?

Once again, DDSOJ police, at their best. If there wasn’t a coverup involved, I’m gonna be pissed.

( My real dad... I was never really interested in learning about him. )

While this is a totally understandable and natural reaction... I really wish–– Actually, no; it’s best Apollo never learned that he once had a father who actually gave a fuck about him. That’d probably break his heart.

“As the son of the terrorist Dhurke, Nahyuta was expelled from the royal family.”

i.... why did Dhurke keep him in Koooraheen, anyway? He really couldn’t have sent him to a happier life in America with his half brother?

huh i think that face-palm is a new expression for Vore Machine. he almost looks reasonable.

“As his son, Yuty no doubt got the cold shoulder at every turn.”

amazing. not only was Apollo abandoned in America in some shit orphanage with zero contact from anything he knew as family, but Sadmad was forced to stay behind in a country that hated his guts. The perfect situation for both boys!!! No wonder they’re both so fucking grouchy all the time! Dhurke, you parental genius!

“Dhurke’s the kinda guy who can become fast friends with just about anyone!”

guess that explains the fandom popularity

“Lol come over n play some jams bro”

“Ok dawg is it chill if i bring my kid my wifes uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

“Yeah its cool I'm great with kids”

“tight”

“It’s like Dhurke’s done nothing but save me all my life” yeah... from messes he made.

“Jangly Justice”

god. i want to root for Jove but like. He looks like a tool, he sounds like a tool, his stage name is the tooliest thing ive ever heard...

originally this section was me ranting about how Thalassa would never have just ‘stopped looking for Apollo’ when she heard that Jove perished in the flames, since Apollo’s corpse was never found and the rebels were out looking for her to give him to her– but instead I’m just gonna leave you with ‘that excuse is mad weak and the writers need to try harder.’

“You should try on the jacket, Apollo!”

“Yeah, yeah!”

Look, I can excuse Athena, because she doesn’t know. But Datz knows its mold infested and disgusting. And he just finished talking about APollo’s tragic past. What the everloving fuck is up with this sicko?!

Also Athena, you can’t laugh at him wearing an eyepatch when he just got done wearing one all last year.

“I’d recognize those horns anywhere!”

“Is that really the only way anyone recognizes me?”

cue Phoenix harrumphing from the corner and brushing his spikes

yknow maybe ive mentioned this before but why /hasn’t/ the queen found the safe house? It’s Dhurke’s old law office; that’d be like, the first place I’d check. Its like wondering if Dumbledore’s Army is based in Hogwarts.

I mean I guess you could say the Queen assumes theyre not stupid enough to hide in their old main haunt but... they’re stupid. they’re really, really stupid. it’s been proven like 800 times.

so we just had a ladder convo about lizards?

also what do you mean geckos like to live in houses? i thought they just climbed around outside them. aLSO WHY ARE THEY EATING THEM

... I appreciate that it ended in a Bugs Bunny Switcharoo though.

...And Phoenix ends it with “theyre just a plain old lizard”

I guess Phoenix doesn’t know flowers or lizards.

i really don’t know why none of the revolutionaries think sadmad’s playing the long con. they’ve all just completely given up on him. what if he was pulling a snape??? they talk about trust and shit and yet none of them trust their own leader’s son? shameful.

“It seems like Gar’an has some serious leverage over him”

okay, they suspect he’s being controlled with some kind of blackmail... and yet do nothing to help him? they’re dumb enough to risk their lives doing something like that, but not compassionate or caring enough?? to their leader’s son???? what the fuck??????

aww i missed Beh’leeb. I hope she and her (born/ unborn? cannot tell if she’s pregnant or not) kid are doing ok.

“So she’s trying to help the revolution along... in her own special way!”

that sounds enormously patronizing phoenix, shut up. she’s pregnant and she has to deal with fucks like Datz running around blowing off firecrackers at government officials.

...youre giving the orb to datz.

ill eat my hat if nothing happens to it.

“We’ll attract undue attention if we go in too large a group”

oh also because youre dressed like baby’s first paint set but

“AAAH!!”

“Do you know something about this?” “Nope! Just felt like shouting is all.”

yes, this is definitely the guy who should hold onto the orb for you. also i presented the attorneys badge. guess he has nothing to say about apollo’s proof of profession, eh?

“Yeah... You’d think Nahyuta might’ve cut his old man some slack, but no.” Dhurke you thick son of a bitch

wow. one single flashback occurrence where Dhurke wasn’t a dick. Well, 1/1000 ain’t too shabby...

“What? You came to visit me and you didn’t even bring me a present?”

What, like your plate of ‘my son is NOT a failure” sushi, Dhurke ?

“But I’m not a rebel.”

“Don’t be ridiculous– You’re a member of the defiant dragons simply by being my son.”

HE’S NOT YOUR SON YOU FUCK

If you present him your attorneys badge he jokes about dying happy and apollo makes it explicit that he means via execution

dhurke. that means apollo would die too. stop fucking joking about him dying you prickwad.

Apollo: Hey Dhurke know anything about this necklace

Dhurke: OOOAAHHH!!! OHHH!! AHHH!!!!

Apollo: So thats a...

Dhurke: Hahahahah its a no son give it here

Apollo: Yeah ok i see nothing suspicious about that at all and i sure hope the secret behind it wasn’t important to this case or anything..........

me: jeez i hope that stupid necklace was the last thing we had to present

phoenix, appearance from god knows where: hey maybe ask about the hostage

me: bless you baby. also i forgot you were here

Phoenix: Sounds like the minister has someone you really care about, cause you totally obeyed everything he did.

i know what youre trying to excuse here SOJ staff but no, straight up lifting right out of JFA will never be ok.

“Is there a new lady in your life?” “WHAT?! DONT BE RIDICULOUS SON!”

I’m gay now! Hahaha. But seriously. Nobody wants to date Dhurke.

“Amara was the love of my life, but she’s gone now, and there will never be another.”

cue Dhurtz shippers furiously jamming their fingers in their ears and whistling

what the

fuck is happening

to his aRM

“You tensed up” HIS BROKEN ARM STARTED VEINING SO HARD THAT IT SHOWED RIGHT THROUGH LIKE 2 LAYERS OF CLOTH

THATS SOME KRISTOPH DEVIL HAND SHIT RIGHT THERE

JESUS CHRI

oh there’s something hidden in there THANK GOD THAT SCAREDTHE FUCK OUTTA ME

“Oh I see– so youre hiding a woman’s photo up your sleeve”

oh yeah, a 3D photo. that has bumpy bits. absolutely apollo.

“You don’t need to keep secrets like that from me– You’re an eligible bachelor now. But you’ll... introduce her to me at some point, right?”

this has that creepy ‘parent insists you have a crush on that one kid’ conversation vibe to it, especially since it’s not like Apollo ever had an attachment to Amara to make him see her as a mother; she was ‘dead’ before he could even walk.

“Mon dieu! Are you into younger women, Dhurke?!”

Athena,,,,,,,, athena,,,, Apollo,,,,, he’s

it’s

oh never mind.

“Heh heh. Dhurke, you old dog, you. You got yourself a younger lover.”

ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW WHAT, NO, NOT NEVER MIND. YOU HAVE A PHOTO OF AMARA. YOU KNOW WHAT AMARA LOOKS LIKE. YOU KNOW HOW TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PAST AND PRESENT DHURKE BECAUSE THERES NO WAY HE COULD JUST RANDOMLY CUT HIS HAIR AND THEN HAVE IT GROW BACK THAT FAST.

I KNOW YOU THINK SHE’S DEAD BUT AT LEAST FUCKING SAY YOU THINK IT’S HER TWIN SISTER YOU UTTER UTTER NUMBSKULLS

“This is Amara before she died. If you look closer, you’ll see that I was younger, too.”

“Hey. You’re right.”

“Aww, that’s no fun.”

MY ULCERS ARE NO FUN BUT GUESS WHAT NEITHER IS LIFE

“Wait a second... Haven’t we seen this woman before?”

DAAAUUUUUUUGGGGHHHHHHH

GOOD FUCKING BALLS PLEASE PLEASE LET THEM BE TROLLING DEAR GOD AAHGGDFKAFAGF

i really love that photo though. everything about it is generally just really nice.

wait hang on. they. they just. they kept her around? after her fake assassination? they just–– WHERE YOU COULD GET A PHOTO OF HER?!

EXPLAIN–– THERE’D BETTER BE A GOOD EXPLAIN

“She was confined within the grounds, but she was fit as a fiddle.”

Ga’ran. Ga’ran. Ga’ran. You stupid, stupid, stupid bitch.

“She was being held under virtual house arrest, so I freed her, and we made a run for it.”

“Of course, we didn’t just proclaim it to the people so that they’d realize Ga’ran was a dirty bitch; that would have been way too easy hahaha.”

Ohhh I see. They didn’t know Ga’ran was the one who did it. Except Ga’ran was the one who kept her under house arrest and faked her death so... It’s pretty obviously her? Amara would know that by putting 2 and 2 together? But no... Apparently Amara was suspicious enough to suspect Dhurke of being the arsonist like Ga’ran said, but brave enough to ‘accompany him so she could ascertain the truth for herself.’

hey remember when i said brave. i meant stupid. she was stupid enough to go with someone she thought might have tried to kill her, completely unsupervised. though i guess you'd have to be that dumb to actually fall in love with Dhurke in the first place.

AH, and she was immediately recaptured. Because Dhurke sucks.

Waaaaait wait wait. How long and when did he ‘rescue’ her? The incident was 23 years ago, but Rayfa is 14– and Amara would need the usual 9 months to gestate– plus, the room she’s holding Rayfa in has the Defiant Dragons handbook in there, so it’s probably someplace of Dhurke’s––

Meaning there was a nine year gap but they still didn’t show her to the general public to depose gar– AGHHH. ITS ALL TERRIBLE!!!

“Apollo. We need to grill the queen about Amara when we have the chance.”

Hobo Nick’s ghost: Hey uhh me, that might get you uhhhhh murdered i thought we got over that after von karma tasered the shit out of u––

SOJ Nick: DOOOOHHOOOHOO I LIKE SOLVING MYSTERIESSS

Apollo: hey maybe the baby Amara’s holding is me.

Athena: Nah it’s too cute to be you.

Apollo: ....i just want to have proof that I’ve known the loving touch of a mother at least ONCE ATHENA OKAY???

“Hm? Oh... well, either way, it’s not you, son.”

yeah fuck you apollo the Sadmahdis only love their REAL children

also its Rayfa. it was in the safe next to Rafya’s letter; Rayfa basically identified it as herself when she saw it, it’s Rayfa.

Apollo: wow youre sure acting vague and suspicious about this; guess i’ll just accept it for what it is.

Dhurke: [tells apollo’s he's going to die and leave him fatherless again]

Apollo: [immediately assumes its another of Dhurke’s jokes because Dhurke’s jokes are horrible and always at Apollo’s expense]

phoenix: ...are you sick?

NICK

OH MY GOD

i shriek laughed

Apollo: [clearly emotionally distraught]

Dhurke: [continues to dance around the issue, thus prolonging Apollo’s suffering]

(Why is this happening now? Just when I was finally starting to feel like you really are my...)

HE DOESN’T DESERVE YOU, APOLLO

GET OUTTA THERE

So far Apollo hasn't said “i’m gonna do x and x and x, or die trying!” and honestly i know it’s a bit on the nose but it’s more true for this situation than any other ones it’s usually said in.

Dhurke: I’ve got a big secret

Apollo: You’ve been hiding something *ELSE* from me?

Dhurke: I’m afraid I can’t tell you what it is. I’d be betraying a certain someone if I did.

WHY DID HE EVEN BRING IT UP THEN!? WHY IS DHURKE JUST THE FUCKING WORST?!!!

“You’ll discover a truth that is hard to accept. But I know you. And I know you can handle the truth, no matter what it turns out to be.”

After all, you’re super great at accepting all the misfortune my existence has heaped upon you! Hahaha!!!

“Apollo... Are you okay?”

“...I’m fine.”

they ask you how you are, and you just have to say that you’re fine, when you’re not really fine, but you just can’t get into it b

h e r e c o m e t h e r e b e l s

and once again you have to manually move there.

action bomb over here from Vore Machine

also beh’leeb sweety youre doing amazing

“Dhurke belongs to the people!! Give him back!!!”

he what now

(sigh)

..............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................hi.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................sadmad...............................................................................................................................................................................

“They’ll be arrested? Just for protesting?!”

Apollo... you live in the real world, r–– oh well technically he doesn't hm

that point’s moot

“They are aiding and abetting a criminal by seeking his release”

uh pretty sure that’s BS yut

“Her Eminence, Queen Ga’ran, has ordered they be arrested and judged en-masse”

ok im fucking

I'm wheezing so bad not ONLY do we have to save a revolution and Dhurke the rebel leader, but we are now about to defend most of the population of an entire country at once. Stakes RAISED bro

good fucking lord apollo stop being all “weren’t you a defiant dragon once?!wehh!!”

even Phoenix, with his Edgeworth obsession, didn’t really question it when Edgeworth was being his shithead prosecutor self.

Nahyuta: Sigh. Guess I can’t escape you. I mean I could use my magic beads to tie you up and then prance off but i have a plot to advance.

“Enough with the zen monk act, Nahyuta– Tell me how you really feel!”

Damnit, Sadmad, it’s not like we have someone who can read emotions by listening to-– oh yeah.

“She’s being held in secret where nobody is allowed to see her.”

second time’s the charm!

Apollo, simply bringing up the reason he’s doing what he’s doing won’t get him to stop. Remember the Phoenix and Maya situation? Until you can guarantee her safety, Sadmad’s just going to keep steam rolling along.

OH FINALLY

ok athena dish the dirt

alright, here we go, folks. time for Nick to get all their asses killed. i mean just listen to that ominous music :/

i love her laugh sprite.

“a lawyer AND a comedian, HOW DROLL”

the royal guards weird me out a bit though. its those masks. I'm getting high lady gaga gives

lady gagaran

Apollo: better give her evidence to burn–– i mean, jog her memory with some evidence.

Ghost of hobo nick: future me!! stop this!! don’t you remember what always used to happen?!

SOJ Phoenix: DOOOHOOOHOOO WE GOT HER NOW, APOLLO!

...........that worked

....no it didn’t. just spring you damn trap already, gagaran.

Apollo: Hm better not tell the people, that could stir up the revolution and actually make it happen. Especially since there might be REAL terrorists hiding out there, just waiting until someone goes, “Hey, that dead queen isn’t really dead!!”

lol

something went wrong?? no way

“Eeeek! Apollo! Don’t strip here!!!”

why is athena such a ditz in this case???

I HEARD A BELT

wow. apollo’s ass canonically bared in AA6

klavier gavin cries a million miles away

“HE WASN’T HIDING THE BULKY ASS ORB IN HIS CLOTHING, YOUR EMINENCE”

“damn i really thought he was hiding it in his skintight pants and vest. also ignore the other two, they couldn’t possibly have it.”

oh lord pls don’t hurt rayfa

“Your mind has been poisoned by the barbed one.”

“It was an honour and pleasure, your eminence”

phoenix i know that was highly badass and all but youre literally sitting pretty to be executed

“”””discipline””””

“Well, Apollo, let’s head back to the safe house for now.”

yes, just in case any spies follow us! so that the queen can get her hands on the orb that much fast!!

oh hi edgeworht, youre in this game

WOO YOU TELL’EM EDGEY

DOWN WITH PLUMED PUNISHER!! DOWN WITH PLUMED PUNISHER!! DOWN WITH PLUMED PUNISHER!!

“Moving along to things that actually matter...”

it’s true, but he shouldn’t say it

“Yeah, it’s like the more we learn about this case, the less we understand.”

just like me and this game’s writing process

“A trial without evidence...”

there’s evidence, you wankers, what do you think that photo of amara, the old case files and the necklace are????

“Athena, you’re too young and extra to die. Sit this trial out so we can save on sprite space.”

“Gotcha, chief.”

“Plus, there’s prosecutor Blackquill to think of. he said he’d use me for sword practice if he put you in harms way.”

Yeah, if Athena dies, who’ll his new punching bag be??? don’t think i haven’t forgotten story teller. i will not forget. i will not forgive.

“Remember; the worst of times are when lawyers have to force their biggest smiles.”

ugh, finally it’s used semi right.

And so, we come to the end of another frustrating chapter. It’s finally time to move on to the final trial. I’m actually kind of curious to find out how everything went down– though something tells me my suffering won’t end when i do.

Welp, friends – till next time. The final hurdle is at hand. Or at least, part one of it.

#sulking over SOJ #ooc #we're almost done... just the final trial still to go...]#spirit of justice spoilers #soj spoilers

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