#and i wouldnt want the animators to speed it cause that never ends well

[is-drhdr-season-2-announced-yet]

waiting for some more drhdr s2 news like

[freebooter4ever]

i’ve seen the discussion going back and forth on boundaries and sexual objectification, and i don’t have much to add to the conversation other than to say everyone is allowed to determine their OWN ‘lines’ and just because we don’t vocalize them doesn’t make them any less valid. but here’s the limits i set for my blog if anyone feels it is important for them to know (<3):

personally I consider ‘characters’ fair game for anything goes, with ‘public personas’ a little more iffy. ‘RPF’ isn’t new - it just takes on a new more accessible/visible form nowadays. i remember reading my first fic about a ‘real person’ back in my LOTR fandom days - it was a story in first person perspective about the main character meeting orlando bloom on a plane before he was ‘famous’. like a lot of these types of stories, it wasnt so much about the person as it was about the meet cute. the actor was just a convenient placeholder with a handsome face and some personality quirks thrown in to make the romance/dialogue more specific. i personally dont read much xReader fic nowadays, but mostly only cause i’m an old fart who can’t relate to the ‘you’ format. i miss the good old days when people actually created OC’s and then inserted them into things LOL. but also LOL if you think i’ve gone an entire year of quarantine without some imagined personal fantasies of joe mazzello (or steve aoki in the years before)(ramilicious can attest to this. she can also attest to most of these fantasies ending in friendship rather than anything explicit cause that’s just how i roll these days lol). the line i draw is i would never post these types of fics in a place where the subject could accidentally find them - you have to go looking for this stuff on tumblr, most fics are given explicit ratings and under read-mores. with the blacklist tags it’s pretty easy to filter things out. its even easier to add filters to ao3 searches. i am NOT going to do something like message steve aoki and say ‘yeah i watched that movie Ibiza like five times, here is my 1k fic where you’re the dj and i’m the one night stand’. but obviously people still enjoy imagining scenarios like these otherwise movies like Ibiza wouldn’t exist?

for art, i consider anything already on display up for grabs, we all know a certain person’s ass is all over the place...all you have to do is google ‘need for speed’ and rami’s name. HOWEVER, in the case of actors i personally would not draw anything more explicit than what’s already there. i’m not gonna draw full frontal nudity for rami (unless he gifts us with it in a movie, i suppose) or anyone. this is 100% a personal choice for me. 

i was a sophomore or junior in college when i volunteered as a figure drawing monitor where i’d time the nude model’s poses and help them set up the stage and lighting and such. there was this one guy in his mid forties probably, a regular who came every week, and i always thought of him fondly till one day (the day after i ran into my Hot Programming TA during dinner and later sent him an email begging him to go on a date with me because i was desperate for kissing experience)(and Hot Programming TA emailed me back within minutes saying yes) this artist guy who i saw all the time and thought i knew fairly well, decided to draw me instead of the model. which would have been fine except he drew me naked. i was NOT naked at the time, i was wearing a shirt, and a bra, and a full prairie skirt with alternating calico and floral patterns. he drew what he imagined was underneath all that. he came up to me after the figure drawing session and showed me his drawings and told me i had been ‘glowing’ and my response was to laugh it off awkwardly and get the hell out of there as soon as i gave the model their pay check. but inwardly i was thinking a) i was NOT glowing for this creepy man twice my age and b) i did NOT give him consent to sexualize my body under my clothes and then SHOW me that objectification. i never said anything to him or anything else, i continued to be the monitor, and i continued to field off creepy advances from him including multiple job offers, but when i finally realized i could just...stop..and i passed the student volunteer monitor job on to my friend naeem, i also realized that what that older male artist did was NOT ok in my book. and it was probably not something he would do while naeem was monitoring.

nowadays im working in an industry that regularly objectifies female bodies. in the past year alone i have had to deal with requests to make breasts bigger, i have been given character rigs that in addition to the usual elbow, knee, and spine joints also have ‘nipple’ joints but ONLY for the women (to make them jiggle for animation), every time i send out a female pose i get it back with notes that push it further into the sexy type of body language reserved for women (twist the spine more! sway the back more! give it ‘energy!’), i have been told to erase wrinkles and fat and pores but ONLY for the women (men you ADD pores bc realism! and manliness!) and this is all me working for a company that is actually fairly progressive in terms of sexism compared to OTHER studios.

like it or not, sexual objectification is a huge part of specifically women’s lives and how we react to that is our business. for me, turning the tables and putting men on display feels like fair’s fair. i cant stop the men from doing it, so if i want to enjoy sexualizing male bodies, damn it im gonna! like dang it, boy do i want to send steve aoki a thank you note every time he posts a video of himself doing those ice baths during the sunset golden hour bc holy shit gorgeous or working out in his gym wearing VERY little clothes, but i dont because i know what its like when someone imposes their personal fantasies on the subject. or, god, there was that time i had to unfollow nicole’s insta for a while bc i had a very explicit dream about her and realized, shit, i need to take a break and get my emotions under control before i can refollow. and god some of the stuff i see dudes sending her during her live videos on mental illness/meditation is TOTALLY gross and not something they should be confronting her with. and she’s not even ‘famous’ famous. or how some fans send their idols explicit direct messages without consent. THAT feels inappropriate to me.

a part of me feels like i shouldn’t have to defend this. men don’t. they’re even encouraged in mass media to sexualize women. but i also recognize the importance of talking about consent. the importance of recognizing that a celebrity deserves to have their boundaries respected. these are my lines in fandom. other people have different lines they won’t cross, and that’s okay to me. i block or blacklist any blogs or tags i think go over the top.

heck, even in fandom-only spaces i still try to keep my own more sexual fantasies off this blog and only in private messages with my friends and mutuals, and i feel like that might come across as unintentionally prudish or judgmental sometimes. i’m not ‘horny on main’ very often. but like...every time i reblog that particular ‘washing machine’ gif of joe mazzello am i thinking about him naked and thinking about how he’s got very loooooong feet, and ‘gee i wonder if that means /other/ things are Too Big for my tastes’ but also ‘gosh wouldnt that make a pretty picture to draw’???? hell yeah.

i dont know who is gonna actually read this essay but yolo i guess :)

[holyytaehyung]

NCT Dream React to s/o getting hurt protecting them

id throw myself infront of a bus for haecha- ahem. ignore me.. FYI this wont be too serious- as in it wont be like, full on accidents. Just things that could happen at any given time (even though major accidents,eg car crash, major trauma,  can and do too just svkjbavajbjvj i just dont feel like crying again today please and thankyou)

Mark When Jeno had called out “MARK HYUNG WATCH OUT” after kicking a ball at the park, Mark immediately ducked, seeing it come straight toward him, he closed his eyes, flinching. But when he heard the impact of the ball, a crack, but didnt feel it, he opened his eyes just in time to see you wince and grab your wrist, after you had tried to block the ball from hitting him, it hitting you at an awkward angle. You couldnt move it without wincing, bruising already forming, Marks eyes would widen , immediately pulling you to him and observing the injury. Hed feel really bad and would probably scold you for getting hurt when he should have, but when you mumbled between sniffles that you only wanted to protect him, his heart fluttered. “i know, baby, but remember i dont ever want you to get hurt, this is pretty serious, thankyou, though.” he mumbled into your neck, on the way to the hospital, his arms around you.

Renjun when Renjun asked Mark to throw him the spatula from the other side of the kitchen, you werent worried, it was only when you realised that it was metal, and hot, having just come from being used in the pan, and the fact that mark seemed distracted, not able to feel the heat because of his sweater paws curse the darn things, you immediately leaped into action, grabbing the hot metal before your boyfriend was, wincing and placing it on the bench. Renjun at first was a little confused but when he saw you place your hand under cold water, a dark red line appearing where the top of the spatula touched your hand, he realised, and he felt horrible and completely silly. “baby- you didnt have to do that, id prefer me to get hurt than you!” hed wrap his arms around you, nuzzling your neck softly, but when you replied with a  “you have a photoshoot tomorrow, renjunnie” His heart would honestly swell at the fact that you were so caring toward him and his work. Hed hate that you got hurt, and would play nurse to help you. 

Jeno Jeno was grabbing books from the bookshelf, without realizing that there was a heavy book ontop of some, that looked like it could fall if you even sneezed too hard, and when you looked up from your phone on the couch to see the massive thing almost falling onto your unaware boyfriend, you immediately jumped up, pushing him out of the way suddenly, which not only scared him but surprised him at your aggression, but when it seemingly happened in slow motion, the book dropping, straight onto your back as you braced yourself, you dropped to the ground with a groan, and he was speechless, his jaw dropping as he processed what just happened. “bABY?” he squeaked, rushing to your side, his hands moving but doing nothing, as he struggled to decide what he should do. “w-why? did you do that?” he said with sad eyes, feeling bad. “dont you dare feel bad, remember when you literally tried to catch me from falling but you ended up falling?” you said, looking to him. Hed chuckle “yeah, but like i said then, i never want to see you hurt.”

Haechan Your boyfriend was playing a dangerous game. Your cat was his source of entertainment for now, as you watched your TV show beside him, but sadly, mittens was quite easily angered. So you warned him, one, twice, three times, that she was getting upset, Only to hear ”dont worry shes fine! arent you mittens- yes~” But when you finally saw the cats tail wag quite fast, you knew what was about to happen,-all to familiar with the animal’s characteristics. You quickly shoved Haechan to the side, causing him to furrow his eyebrows, ready to ask you what the heck you were doing, when the cat struck out, its claws slicing your hand, a fresh red stream leaking almost immediately. His eyes widened and he instantly felt bad, Knowing that you were right the entire time.

“im sorry” was what he said softly, pulling you to him and observing the incision, cleaning it up. “i shouldve listened to you..” “obviously” you said laughing at him softly. He knew then that he had chosen to date the perfect person- able to understand cats AND sassy.

Jaemin it was a bad idea, to throw plates to eacother to put them away, so when Haechan and Jaemin were doing the dishes; what did they do? They did it. But when you saw your boyfriend look away when a plate was coming in his direction, a startled squeak coming from Haechan at the distracted kid before him,  You, who saw it, acted,  But, you werent the best catch, so instead it dropped to the floor, but you lost your balance, falling forward, causing your hand to land on the shattered plate, your entire body weight on the hand. You winced and got up, Jaemin who was looking on in horror, immediately went to your side, apoligising a million times with wide eyes as he browught your hand to the sink, luckily- the injury was all bark and no bite, looking worse than it actually was because of the blood. So with a few bandaids you were okay. Putting them on for you, he looked at you sadly, bringing you into a hug, kissing the bandaids softly.

“dont ever get hurt for me again baby, if im so stupid i deserve to get injured” he mumbled, making you pout. “nope, ill do it as often as i need to, you keep me safe and i keep you safe.” He smiled at your stubborness. “what did i do to deserve you...”

Chenle When Chenle’s hyungs tried to play a prank on him, you knew it wouldnt go down too well. You knew chenle did okay with spicy food, but that much spice? That would hurt. The idea of seeing him in pain had you thinking of ways to avoid the situation for him, unfortunately going for the idea of eating it yourself- even if you cant handle spice... So when chenle went to grab the dumpling the hyungs planned for him, you pouted and begged him for it, him being a fool for you, immediately obliged, causing you to see the looks on his hyungs faces as their eyes became wide. “NO Y/N” Jaehyun started, but you had already eaten it. “what?” chenle said, looking at Jaehyun then back at you, watching as your face began to go red. “that was supposed to be for you.. it was extra extra spicy..” Yuta explained, making chenles eyes widen, knowing how you cant handle it. “you knew?” he and the hyungs said to you when you nodded, the hyungs were speechless, and so was chenle, you had tried to protect him. “you -have- to sing soon-” you said in between sniffles, and honestly his heart and all the hyungs hearts would speed up at the cute and dedicated action. Hed still feel horrible that you protected him and got hurt, but hed give you alot of milk and hug you until it was all better.

Jisung You were sitting in the dance practice room, not too far from Jisung, when you saw him start to loose his balance, stumbling, you immediately got up to try and help him, but he ended up falling back onto you. He had braced to fall, but when he felt himself fall onto something softer than the floor, and a little squeak was heard from you, he immediately had wide eyes as he realised you ad tried to help him. His frame was much bigger than yours so he started freaking out, getting up as quick as possible, knowing that you were probably injured. He watched you caress your ribs softly, wincing a little, but he couldnt help but smile at your little action. “listen here, cheeky one.. we get taught how to fall so it doesnt hurt as much” he pokes your nose. “so, i dont want to see you get hurt for me ever again, okay?” When you nodded, with a pout, hed smile, “youre still my hero, baby” hed hug you, careful to not hurt you. -admin rose

[hysterialevi]

Abraham - A RDR2 Fanfic

Fanfic summary [NO SPOILERS]: Lyle Morgan and his eleven-year-old son have a conversation about Beatrice’s death, only for the boy to witness a second one.

Warning(s): Mild language

Author’s note: Bear with me if not everything in this story is correct. I’m not entirely sure where Arthur’s originally from (all I’ve heard is that he’s from somewhere in the north), so I just made something up lol. Also, this fic will only be one part. Anyway, hope you enjoy :)

From Lyle’s POV

A FOREST SOMEWHERE IN MONTANA

SUMMER, 1874

Strollin’ through the tall, thick grass, I led my mount around the forest at a casual pace while my son sat on top, consumed by his journal as always. It was an hour or two before midday, and right now, there was a radiant blanket o’ sunshine bathing the entire forest, painting everything with a golden tint. It was beautiful, and I wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of the day out here...but this feeling of annoyance just wouldn’t stop naggin’ me, and I knew exactly why.

I briefly glanced over my shoulder, peering at my son as he scribbled something down in the weathered pages of his journal.

A quick sigh escaped me.

I didn’t know who the hell Arthur got his interest in art from, or why Beatrice even bothered buying him that book, but that child just couldn’t seem to take his eyes away from it. Every time I came across the boy, he was always scratchin’ down some fantasy world of his, or creating images of a utopia I ain’t ever seen. It was pointless.

He spent more time daydreamin’ in that book than he did playing outside, or hunting, or fishing -- hell, he didn’t even know how to read -- and yet, Beatrice seemed perfectly content with it.

Or at least...she did.

Beatrice weren’t around no more. She was killed by bandits a few months ago. Robbed. Left on the side o’ the road for the crows to feed on. But Arthur didn’t know that. Sheriff told him it was a wild animal that took her. A wolf, to be exact. And he believed him.

I dragged a hand down my face, suddenly feelin’ exhausted just thinking about it.

Had I done the right thing, not tellin’ Arthur the truth about his own mother’s death, I wondered? I figured the kid didn’t need to know the morbid details, or even the entire truth, but I still felt like a piece of shit for not revealing the full story -- especially considering that them bandits who killed Beatrice...killed her ‘cause of me.

I had stolen something from them. Somethin’ valuable. And before it fell into their dirty hands, that “something” apparently belonged to a rich plantation owner who really wanted it back. Ended up gettin’ one of the bandits hanged, and left them thirsty for revenge. But they didn’t have the strength to go after the plantation owner. So, they came after me instead.

They chased me for quite a while. They chased me across the mountains, across the swamps, across the goddamned snow...until finally, they came to their senses and realized there were much better, more convenient ways of hurtin’ me. And thus, their paths diverted to my wife and son.

Those bastards managed to corner her while she was ridin’ to town to do some shopping. Found her on some secluded road between here and the nearest settlement, and ensured she would never return. That was when Arthur went lookin’ for help to find his missing mother hours later, and the sheriff assured him a wolf had gotten to Beatrice.

Christ. I really was a terrible father, weren’t I? Not only did I pay more attention to a bottle o’ whiskey than my own wife, I had also neglected Arthur for years on end, and indirectly gotten his mother killed. And the boy was only eleven.

He had spent half of his life not knowing a damned thing about where his daddy was, or even what he did, only to lose the one parent he already had before he could find out.

Lord...there had to be some way to make this up to him.

I looked back at the boy, suddenly feeling an urge to say something -- anything -- to him.

“Arthur,” I called out, catching the kid’s attention as his head perked up from behind the journal’s pages, “put that damned book away for a moment, will you?”

The boy hurriedly marked his place in the journal with a pen and shut it closed, resting the object on the saddle’s surface as he hung his head low in shame.

“...Sorry, sir.” He murmured.

I shook my head, lettin’ out a concerned breath.

“You spend far too much time in that journal. It was a mistake to buy it.”

Arthur’s eyes wandered to the trees towering around us.

“I’m sorry, dad,” he apologized timidly. “But I like drawing.”

I scoffed. “Yeah? Well, I like Poker. But I ain’t got time to play it. Too busy worryin’ about survival, and keeping the both of us fed. You can’t always do what you want, Arthur. You gotta provide. Things like drawing, gambling...they’re frivolous. We got better things to worry about.”

The child quirked a brow. “Friv-uh-less...? What’s that mean?”

“It means we don’t need to do it,” I explained. “What we do need, however, is to eat. So put that journal away and keep an eye out for deer. You was the one who suggested we come out here in the first place.”

Arthur frowned in a discouraged manner. “Yes, sir.”

I gave him a stern nod. “Good boy. Now...you said you seen a big buck out here?”

The boy pointed ahead. “Yeah. It was by the river.”

I gave the reins a little tug, urging my horse to follow me. “Then that’s where we’ll start. C’mon, Boadicea.”

Continuing our little hunting trip, Arthur and I traveled deeper into the lively woods as creatures of all types scurried around us, rustling blades of grass and alerting the tiny insects that hovered above the plants.

There was a rather peaceful mood to the forest today -- a welcome change considerin’ how chaotic my life usually was -- and I had to admit: some part of me enjoyed being here with Arthur. I rarely ever got to see the boy because of my work as an outlaw, and when I did, he always seemed reluctant to leave the house. Whether that was because he was more of an indoors person, or simply ‘cause he weren’t eager to spend time with me -- I didn’t know. But it was good to be with him regardless.

Approaching the large river, I came to a temporary halt as I crouched down and examined the ground, carefully searchin’ for any tracks that could’ve possibly led us to the buck.

The area here appeared undisturbed -- save for the fish flopping in and out of the babbling water -- and as far as I could tell, there weren’t no deer running around this section of the forest. Not at the moment, anyway. Maybe they were at a different part of the river.

I took a closer look at the grass, only to be torn away from my thoughts when Arthur raised a question.

“Dad?” He asked softly. “Can I...can I ask you something? About momma?”

I paused, thrown off-guard by the sudden change in tone.

“Momma?” I repeated, slowly turning towards the boy. “Why you wanna talk about her?”

Arthur’s expression sank with sorrow.

“It’s just...you knew her better than I did. Or longer, I guess. And I don’t remember her that good. ...Do you?”

I gazed at him in a puzzled manner, admittedly still a bit taken aback by the abrupt question.

“...Clear as day,” I replied, unwilling to sift through the painful memories. “But that don’t matter. She’s...she ain’t coming back, Arthur. No one does, once they die. Ain’t no point in lingerin’ in the past when it can only haunt you. All we can do is move on. You understand?”

Clearly a bit hurt by my response, Arthur dropped the subject and averted his eyes from me, peering over at a nearby gathering of flowers instead.

He slouched despondently. “...I understand.”

That wasn’t good enough for me. I took a step towards him.

“Look at me when you say that, Arthur,” I demanded. “It’s important you look people in the eye when you speak to them.”

The boy brought his line of sight back to me, his face veiled behind a very subtle layer of fear.

He straightened his back a bit. “I understand.”

I nodded in approval. “Good. Now...let’s get back to huntin’ this buck. You sure it was around the river?”

Arthur gazed around. “I saw it this morning when I was playing with Copper,” he confirmed. “It was drinkin’ water right here. That’s when I came to get you.”

I observed the dirt underneath me, squinting my eyes as I searched for clues. The grass in these parts was quite thick, so that made it even tougher to spot fur, or dung -- and I still didn’t see any deer tracks -- but it certainly looked like another animal had been around here.

I kneeled down, shuffling the grass outta the way with my hand.

“It looks like some wild horses might’ve passed through this area,” I examined. “But no sign of deer. Oh, well...the day is still young, and we have some time, so we’ll keep looking.” I gestured to a nearby bridge. “Let’s try over there.”

Grabbing my horse’s reins, I continued to guide it through the woods as Arthur scouted the area for me, his big blue eyes scanning the sharp horizon while the sun escalated in the sky. There was a certain determination in his temperament now, and the longer we carried on trying to locate this buck, the more my son seemed to be enjoying himself.

Perhaps there was hope for us, after all.

“...Dad?” The boy called again, making me flick my eyes to the side. “What if there are wolves out here?”

I encouraged him to stay calm. “Now, don’t you go worryin’ about that. If we see wolves out here, we’ll be fine. We’re armed, we’re fast, and we’re smart.”

Arthur wasn’t convinced. “...Momma was smart.”

I sighed in a melancholic tone at that. “Yes...she was. But...Momma was killed by a different type of wolf.”

He tilted his head in a puzzled manner. “What d’you mean?”

I gestured to my rifle. “Not all wolves are the same, Arthur. Some use their teeth, some use their guns, and some use their tongue. You gotta be able to identify them when you see ‘em.”

The kid didn’t say it flat out, but I could tell he knew what I was really talkin’ about.

“Those sound more like people.” He replied. I let out a gentle chuckle.

“People can be worse than wolves, Arthur. In fact, I’d prefer a wolf over some o’ the people I’ve met.”

Arthur leaned forward in the saddle, his body swaying along with Boadicea’s steady speed.

“What kinda people have you met?”

I lowered my voice, thinking back to the bandits who killed Beatrice.

“Killers. Thieves. Deceivers. Men who will constantly betray each other even though they share the same motive: greed.”

I turned to Arthur with a remorseful look, hopin’ to do at least one right thing in my life, and use myself as a cautionary tale that money weren’t as clean as it seemed.

“...Greed,” I told him, “it breaks people, Arthur. They may not realize it, ‘cause greed can get you far in this world...but the reward ain’t worth it. Not compared to the things you have to sacrifice. In the end, you’ll have tons of cash, only to realize that there are luxuries not even millionaires can afford.”

His innocence took over. “Then why do they do it?”

That was a question I asked myself everyday. I shrugged in a disheartened fashion.

“Because they don’t care. So long as their pockets is heavy, and their bellies is full, they’ll keep on going. But like I said, greed poisons you. It kills you. And you won’t even notice until you’re already sittin’ in a grave. So promise me, Arthur, promise me that when you get to my age...you won’t become a wolf.”

Despite evidently bein’ a little confused, the child was able to make some sense of what I just said and agreed to the promise, reassuring me with a small smile.

“I promise.”

“Good boy,” I praised, bringing my mind back to the main reason we came out here. “Anyway, here’s the bridge. Why don’t you hop down and help me find this buck?”

“Okay.”

Sliding down the saddle, Arthur effortlessly climbed down and joined me, scurrying ‘round like a mouse while he searched for any signs of the buck. But so far, there was nothing in sight.

“See anything?” I checked. The boy shook his head.

I wiped some sweat off my brow, letting out a fatigued sigh. This animal was certainly proving to be a challenge to hunt down. We had already been in this forest for a couple hours now, and our efforts still hadn’t paid off. Part o’ me was almost starting to suspect if Arthur even saw a deer in the first place, and not some other kinda animal.

I decided to take a short break, and turned to ask the boy.

“You positive the buck was roamin’ around in these parts? Or that it was a buck at all? I haven’t seen any tracks so far.”

A soft rustle suddenly reached my ears, interrupting my conversation with Arthur as I reached for my gun, only to be stopped by a sound I didn’t expect.

It was a man’s voice.

“...Don’t even think about it,” the stranger warned, cocking his own gun. “I will shoot if necessary.”

Freezing at the intrusion, I remained perfectly still and didn’t utter a single word as a pair of footsteps steadily approached me from behind, followed by two more men coming in from the front on horseback.

They were all dressed in similar outfits donned with Nevada hats, and I couldn’t help but notice the star-shaped badges shimmerin’ blatantly on their chests.

Shit. These were lawmen. What the hell were they doin’ out here? I never expected the law to travel this far into the country. This was definitely odd.

What really puzzled me though, weren’t the fact that there were three lawmen just...waitin’ for us out here -- it was more the fact that Arthur didn’t seem phased by any of this in the slightest. Just what exactly was goin’ on?

Trotting closer to me, one of the mounted men glowered in my direction as he ordered his deputy to restrain me, his firm, steel eyes never wavering.

I recognized him instantly.

“...Sheriff Buchanan.” I muttered through gritted teeth.

He returned the greeting, scowling from under his hat’s rim.

“Lyle Morgan.”

I shrugged at him, unsure of what to make of the situation.

“What is this shit? What’s the sheriff doing all the way out here?”

Buchanan glanced at Arthur, standing in front of him in a protective manner.

“I told you I’d use every option I had to get you behind bars, Morgan...and I meant it. You made the choice not to heed my warning.”

Taking a second to process what he just told me, the realization suddenly hit me like a bullet to the gut as I stared at Arthur with a sense of immense betrayal, unable to believe what was happening.

There never was no goddamned buck.

Things was never gonna work out for me and Arthur.

This was all a trap.

My own...son...had turned me in.

He was the bait, and Buchanan was the true hunter.

I clenched my jaw in rage, doing my absolute best to shield my emotions as the deputy kicked me to my knees.

“...A-Arthur...?” I whispered, my voice trembling.

The boy looked me straight in the eye, standing adamantly beside Buchanan as his deputies tied me up. I threw a glare at the sheriff, damning him till my last moments.

“You bastard, Buchanan...!” I cursed. “You turned my own damned son against me...?!”

The man showed no guilt and tightened his grip on his rifle, silently advising me to stay back.

“No need,” Buchanan denied. “You drove him to me all by yourself.”

He placed a gentle hand on Arthur’s shoulder and guided him towards the second deputy, ordering them to bring him back to town.

“Clayton, bring the boy back to the office. We’ll figure out where to send him later. For now though, just keep him safe, and look after him.”

“Right away, Sheriff.”

Preparing both his horse and mine for departure, the deputy left Arthur next to the sheriff as the boy stood firmly in place, his innocent yet damaged gaze never leavin’ mine.

Despite the hint of remorse clouding the child’s eyes, it was pretty obvious Arthur felt he made the right decision in turning me in. And just as Buchanan’s second deputy started to drag me away, I couldn’t help but notice a beautiful Whitetail buck wanderin’ around in the distance, its majestic antlers standing out like a crown on a monarch’s head as it bathed in the golden sunlight.

The animal swayed its head in my direction, almost as if trying to communicate with me.

“I’m sorry, dad,” Arthur whispered as he walked towards Clayton, blocking the buck in the process. “...But you made me promise.”

Taking his leave, the boy finally mounted up and steadily trotted away from the scene, only to reveal an empty spot where the buck once stood as he left the forest.

Well...I may have found the buck like I planned, but it weren’t my job to kill it.

And it certainly weren’t my place to look for it.

I could hunt them down to my heart’s content, and kill ‘em all I wanted for my own desires...but in the end, they would always be able to afford the one luxury I’d never obtained.

Peace.

[nicorii]

The purple scarf

¤forgot in I sent in a fanfic, so I’m I sent you one already…here is a second one¤

Kevin fell first.

It was easy to tell who would fall first. Jamie fell in love with garnet at first sight, but his true love was theatre, and he poured his heart into it,making himself stunning in a happy-go-lucky way. Who wouldn’t fall for the town star?

Kevin sat in the audience as Jamie played Juliet in Shakespeare’s classic play,“romeo and Juliet”. Of course jamie wouls play Juliet, he fit the part perfectly. He was On stage with the small local town theatre, so it wasnt just him and Steven this time.

Oh yeah, Steven. It was will fault.

His and Connie’s fault.

Stevonnie’s fault.

He remembered how it happened. How Jamie turned from him to those two…two….

Kids. Over Kevin. It was infuriating.

____________________________________________

Kevin has seen the second play Jamie ever did. He avoided the first one because it seemed dumb, to lame for Kevin,but he saw flyers for the second play all over town, and everyone talked about it. He figured he would go, and make fun of it. Teach them how to really act.

He didnt expect for the actor in charge too be so adorable in a kitten costume.

Jamie had written a play, and a lot of characters got ‘turned into animal’s as a plot point.

Jamie had black sharpie on his nose, with whiskers on his cheeks. He wore a head band with brown fuzzy ears, a shade lighter than his own fluffy hair. The tail he had tied to the belt he wore matching amazingly.

It was so adorable.

Kevin actually enjoyed the play, but was more focused on the cat boy. Justin? Was that his name? Something like that. It didnt matter much to him anyways.

When the play ended, Kevin went backstage to see Justin.maybe he could be entertaining for one person.

Maybe he could dance.

Kevin saw the boy with the fluffy brown hair and big nose. He still had the cat ears on and was finishing up some last minute stuff before he went to join the others for the after party. Kevin smirked and leaned on the wall with one hand, the other on his hip, a smug smile gracing his face.

“Its Kevin time” he said, catching Justin’s attention. He looked back at Kevin.he smiled snd walked Over, just liked Kevin planned. They wouls talk, he would call him cute, they’d go do things Kevin wanted. Justin stood infront of Kevin. Here it came.

“Hey baby, I’m Kevin.” He winked.

Hi Kevin, I’m Jamie.“ Oh Jamie was his name. So much cuter than Justin. It suited him.“can you pleaze,not,lean on the set?”

There it is,the-wait…what?

He didn’t fall head over heels frpm him in a moments notice? He didn’t blush or stutter? Didnt even avoid eye contact in a nervous way?

He just asked Kevin…to stop leaning on the stage equipment…

He didn’t expect that.

He got off and smirked as he took a step to Jamie. He could make it work, just had to play his cards right.

“So Jamie.” He said as smoothly as he could,“ you act, but do you dance?” Kevin watched as jamie,looked at him, mouth slightly open, eyes wide and sparkling. This is what Kevin wanted. Kevin gets what he wants.

“Youre perfect!” Jamie said suddenly. Kevin gave a knowing side smile, of course he was perfect, he was Kevin. “Can you be. The lead in my,next play?” Jamie said excitedly, hands balled infront od his chest in excitement.

Wait

What?

“Hold up, you want kevin….to be in. A Play?” Jamie nods his head quickly, the cat ears falling off as he did.

“Youre prefect for the role! You have the ‘uptight bad boy’ look going on, and the crowd will love you!” Kevin looked at the guy infront of him. The way he had his hands held in excitement. How his,knees were bent,like he was about to jump, how he looked at Kevin with chocolate brown eyes that sparkled under the stage lights. How he still hasnt picked the headband up off his nose.

Kevin won’t admit,it out loud

But he couldnt tell Jamie no.

He physically couldn’t.

“ill see what it’s about. Id it isnt a waste of Kevin’s time,Kevin’ll do it.” He shrugged, Jamie quickly ran and grabbed a script, giving it to Kevin as he talks about the main,role of 'chas’ ans Kevin swears this boy doesnt run out of breath.

******

The play was a romance. Who would have know Jamie was a sap. Despite how dumb it,looked, Kevin wanted to play it. It was about A stuck up. Boy named chas who fell in love with a stubborn commoner named leoki and he couldn’t have her so he wanted her. Kevin blinked.“his writing aint to bad if Kevin likes it. I bet he will be obsessed with me!” He grinned

Kevin could not act.

“Kevin…"Jamie held his head in his hands as he sighed."we’ve been through this twenty times…and you aren’t any better…" 

Kevin glared st him."you wanted me in your stupid play!”

Jamie sighwd and nods.“I know…I know….I…"he looked Kevin up and down."I can..work with this…how about you and I go out tomorrow to get to know each other so I can figure out how to teach you how to act.” Kevin looked st the shorter boy. He broke into a grin. So he wantsd s date.

“Alright, thats cool.”

*******

Mail. He was helping jamie deliver mail,

“I thought you worked in theatre?"Kevin carried jamies mail bag.

"I do. But I was a mailman first and I dont really make that much just by performing…” Jamie slid a letter into a mail box.“but that’s the last one, now we can go on with our day.” Smiling, he took his bag from Kevin.

“Yeah, its Kevin time” Kevin quickly lead jamie to his car

Long story short, Kevin had to obey the speed limit or jamie starts crying in fear.

Kevin drove around, nor really looking for anything, he just liked to drive. Jamie aeemes to love rhe veiw of the ocean the higher they were, and by the wns of it. They were as high as they could get above beach city.

They spent the day just talking, Jamie about acting, ans,how one day he would be on movies, ans Kevin bragged about himself.

Kevin soon was dropping jamie off at his apartment. Jamie stood at the car door as he got out grinning.“wait here.” He quickly went inside. Kevin waited, his car door still opened, until Jamie came out. He held out a piece of purple faded fabric. Kevin took it snd unfolded it. It was a scarf.

“Its not much, and I just had it lying around, but I noticed you never go anywhere without a scarf. So i thought I’d give it to you as a thank you present for spending the day with me” jamie smiled a smile that could lighr up the entire world.

And Kevin was gone just like that.

Kevin quick threw the scarf onto the passenger seat and looked away from jamie,“yeah whatever. Ill see you at rehearsal tomorrow.” He waved and drove off once jamie,closed the door.

Kevin practiced his lines all night.

When Kevin went to reversal the next day, he wore the scarf Jamie gave him. This was a Kevin and jamie only’ day, because Kevin seriously needed the help. 

He just hoped he could act well enough to hide his new full blown crush on the boy.

As Kevin walked to the stage, he saw Jamie holding a script and mumbling some lines to himself. The spot lights werent even on and Jamie was all Kevin could focus on. 

“Hey jamie.” Kevin stated walking up. Jamie shovwd rhe stack of papers ar Kevin grinning.

“I rewrote some of the script to help you, I find it much more Kevin like now, and it makes chas stand our as a character even more. Want to try the new lines?” Jamie didnt miss a breath npr a breath as he excitedly talked to Kevin. His eyws looked at Kevin’s neck and he blinked. “You’re,wearing the scarf I gave you.” He geinnss happily.

It was official, Kevin was,now,wearing that scarf everyday if it,made him smile like that.

Kevin only nodded and read the new lines. He did like them a little better, and when he had a few memorized, his acting was better, at least Jamie said so.

Kevin managed to get through the. Day without jamie finding out about his crush on him.

Maybe he was a good actor after all.

*******

It was almost the night of the play, Kevin had all his lines and movements,memorized, and he realized quickly, that he didnt have just some silly crush on Jamie.

No.

Kevin was in love, completely and fully.

And Jamie,was oblivious.

Kevin would help Jamie with the mail some days, but he only managed to find,him during the last few streets of houses. He mostly just carried the bag for him. 

Kevin tried fo get jamie to,go to a rave, but instead they stayed inside watching movies which Kevin enjoyed more. If meant he had Jamie all to himself and only had to share with benefit,lumberjack for a few hours.

Kevin always wore the scarf jamie gave him, and every time jamie saw it he seemed to light up.

They were practicing a scene Kevin had a little trouble with still when they showed up. The two kids who ruined everything Kevin worked so hard for.

“Jamie!” A small little boy voice called out, catching the thespains attention as he looked at the short, curly haired,boy and grinned.“hey Steven! Hi Connie!” He ran to the side of the stage, leaving Kevin at the side, just watching the conversation.

“You guys coming to the play tomorrow?” Jamie,asked them excitedly.

“i wouldnt miss it! You have the best plays Jamie!” Steven exclaimed. Connie nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, the last one was so cute when everyone became an animal. I wonder what will happen in this one.”

Jamie grinned.“you guys should meet the lead! He is really cool! Kevin come here and meet my friends!” Jamie called back to the boy who only glared at the two kids. They stole his spotlight. And,they were still obsessed with Kevin. Kevin walked ocee as he heard the two kids gasp and saw them glare.

“Kevin…”

Jamie was so, so oblivious.

“Oh, you guys already know,each other?” He smiles that smile that kills Kevin every time. That was his,smile, the one jamie gives him for wearing his scarf, not just anyones,smile.

“These kids are obsessed with me.” Kevin said as the two kids ingored him and told Jamie.

“When connie and I fused the first time, he wouldnt leave us alone until we danced with him!”

“And then we unfused and he freaked out cause we were kids! He was a real jerk!”

“We raced him in a car he was mean and rude to everyone!”

“He says we are obsessed with him but he didn’t even know what personal space is!”

“Hey!,who said you were the victim here! You’re just obsessed with me! Dont deny it! I just wanted to dance then you got all crazy and tuened into two kids! Not my fault that you lost a race when I’m the best! Scram already, you ain’t welcome here!”

“Yes they are."Jamie’s voice was hard and low, ans he stood looking at Kevin.

"Kevin these are my friends…they mean a lot to me…and they are always welcomed here. Now…did you really mean all of that? You’ve been really nice to me, but that-”

“So you’re taking their side of this?!” Kevin couldn’t believe it. He spent nearly every day with Jamie! He was the lead in his next play! He couldn’t be siding with two kids!“they are just obsessed kids!”

“Kevin you are all my friends, I don’t want to take a side I,just want to know what-”

“No!,I’m the lead in your play, you asked for me to be the lead! I help you with your mail and you should be siding with me!” Why was he yelling? This wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted jamie in his arms, not arguing with him.

,Kevin I dont owe you anything! You didnt have to be the lead and you don’t have to help me with the mail, thats my job! I just wanted,to know the full story because youre all my friends and I wanted to keep it that way!“

"I don’t want to be youe friend!” He wanted to be more. But jamie didn’t get that. Jamie looked at him hurt and looked down.

“Oh.”

Steven and Connie gasped and glared at Kevin like he killed jamie.

Kevin couldn’t find his words. He couldn’t say them even id he found them, he wanted to be more than friends, didnt jamie get that? 

“Forget this, I’m outta here!” Ans Kevin jumped off the stage leaving. It was all those kids fault.

Kevin didnt,show up,to the play.

Jamie had been smart and, of course, has buck as his understudy, so the play still went on.

________________

Kevin sat in the last row of chairs by himself as jamie took a bow with the rest od the thespains. He played with the purple scarf on his neck. He,should be up there as romeo, not Some other guy he didnt know. They didn’t actually kiss, it was only a theatre kiss, were you kiss the peesons thumb instead, bur Kevin would have kissed him for real. He should be romeo.

But it was all those kids fsult.

They made Jamie take their side.

Kevin wasn’t offered the lead role like last time, and didnt help jamie with the mail.

But Kevin still wore his dumb scarf. 

And on stage, for a second Kevin saw jamie look at him.

He saw he scarf Kevin was playing with around his neck

Ans kevin saw Jamie give a smike

His smile

So he knew he saw the scarf.

…

Maybe he should apologize to the kids…

It was still all their fault…but just….

Maybe.

$;$(!)#_#;!€÷_!&!£’?!&

wow that was fun to write! But to quickly explain better, a theatre kiss is when you put your hand on someones cheek,and your thumb on their lips, and you kiss your thumb. It looks real but isn’t a kiss.

I love the idea of Kevin falling first, ans qanted to write ir. If you want ill gladly make you a second part.

Submitted by: @sockpansy

I really loved the part about Kevin wearing the scarf Jamie gave him just to make him smile. The small movie date part was cute too aaa. aND THE DRAMA?? OOF, great work!!