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#and i. don’t really. lately i’ve felt a little desperate for human interaction and idk. just sucks.
j-esbian · 10 months
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you know. i have seen a lot of posts that say something to the effect of “adult friendships are going to be different” which i get because aging tumblr population etc. but it rly comes across as “if you didn’t have a certain kind of friendship (i have a specific idea in mind but i will not specify because We All Know what i mean [editor’s note: i don’t because your experiences are not universal]) before you hit your 20s, you’ve lost your chance because all of your friends are getting married and having kids and have less time for you” and like. idk does that really need to be said
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ilikemesometaetaes · 4 years
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Set Me Free (M)
Min Yoongi Oneshot
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•••> Author: @ilikemesometaetaes​
•••> Summary: You are just an ordinary woman with a strange aura about you that Yoongi can’t seem to resist- even past the compulsion of his mentor. The question is: why?
•••> Pairing(s): Yoongi/Reader
•••> Requested by @itsgottabeyoo-ngs​ : “Hi daddy, One shot request with vampire Yoongi x brat reader. Bonus points for adding in choking or spitting idk make it filthy k thanks love you byeeeee xoxoxoxox”
•••> Word Count: 10.95k
•••> Rating: 18+
•••> Tags: smut | vampire!au | Yoongi!AU | Vampire’s Mate | Vampire!Yoongi | Human!Reader | Gifted!Reader
•••> Warnings: smut, oral (female receiving), unprotected sex, murder, attempted murder, slight choking/strangulation, dirty talk, biting, blood drinking, spitting, violence, horror, vampire/human relationship, cursing, mental attachment, thirsty Yoongi, Yoongi thinks he’s scary, but he’s totally not
Copyright © 2020 ilikemesometaetaes. All Rights Reserved.
Thank you for the request, babe! This one is a bit to unpack, as you can see. I hope you enjoy :)
~#~
Yoongi never claimed to have his thirst under complete control.
He stands before his brothers once every week for the feed, snarling as he consumes his share of blood, while the others bear witness so as to provide him ceremonial protection- a vampire is very vulnerable while he consumes blood. The polydipsia made one lose all form of reason and sense of mind, driven to the brink of animalistic insanity when it was in the process of mildly quenching the eternal hunger.
Polydipsia, used to describe his level of thirst, was the word made just for him in his own little world.
It wasn’t normal thirst, like a human, but the savage-like impulse to drink and drown until he could swim in a river of blood and take deep lungfuls of the crimson fluid. The impossible desire to consume and be completely consumed by blood until he became it himself always loomed over his mind in his early days as a Deadblood- a vampire youngling- causing him to search for a word that could completely describe his affliction.
Then the Greeks begun transforming their language, perfecting the word that he could use to chronicle his need. He had mulled over the thought throughout the few centuries that the word came into existence, truly connecting with it on a level that was deprived of him when his soul was taken from his body.
But the word was not only used to describe normal thirst; it described the abnormal desire to drink as a symptom of disease- and a disease is what Min Yoongi had.
From the days he explored the lands of Goryeo as a young teenage boy, he knew that disease racked every inch of the world. Street beggars, riddled with sicknesses and incurable illnesses, asked him for coin, food, clothing, and any necessities that could potentially carry them through the night into another sunrise. But the one thing that they begged for the most was water.
Liquid life. Yoongi thinks back on the ironic turn of events and how, even as a privileged boy of nobles, he understood just how desperate a person got when they were deprived of the one, singular fluid that supported life as he knew it.
As Yoongi approached adulthood, he was promoted and bestowed larger honors in the name of the Min clan, allowing him to provide more for the beggars and lower-class individuals that he came across on the streets every day- not that his father would find out.
Until he did.
Yoongi recalls the moment he knew that his father figured out that his son was spoiling the family riches on the lower class. They weren’t sitting down for dinner and having a conversation nor taking a stroll along the river like the two of them normally would- it was quite surprising, really. Yoongi had to applaud his father for the creativity of the circumstance.
He knew that his father figured out his whereabouts when he found himself bleeding out in the middle of the woods with three arrows, adorned with the Min clan crest carved into the wood, sticking out of his chest. He was sent to look for his supposedly lost little sister under the direction that she was probably at a watering hole- which Yoongi had never heard about- about forty-five minutes from the edge of Goryeo’s walls.
Many people ventured outside of the city to fend for food and necessities, or to find civilization elsewhere, so it wasn’t surprising to him that his curious baby sister wanted to see for herself what life was like outside of the city’s limits.
As Yoongi lay dying on the soil of the earth, staring up at the greenery of the trees above while they lightly swayed in the breeze, he realized that everyone, regardless of social-class or physical health, was fighting the same, universal disease: death. No one could escape it and no one was safe. At least, that’s the epiphany he had in an effort to comfort himself while he felt his heart painfully struggle to beat with an arrowhead lodged into it. Copious amounts of blood spurt out with each pulse of his damaged organ.
And then the universe decided to set him free from death with a cure worse than the disease itself.
Yoongi doesn’t remember who his creator was. He doesn’t remember how long he spent on the forest floor with the arrows still in his chest. He doesn’t remember waking up.
His memory of his new life started from the moment his consciousness returned, in the exact second that he found a set of vocal cords clutched in the palm of his hand, dripping with crimson, after apparently ripping them out of a young boy who was actively collapsing in front of him. The boy, who Yoongi immediately recognized from the streets of Goryeo, was choking on his own gore as he clutched at his now nonexistent throat, staring up at his killer with a jumbled expression that silently begged for help yet withdrew from terror.
It took Yoongi five years of trekking everywhere and no where while attempting to control his thirst before he found new meaning. He mostly had a hold on the scorch in his throat by staying away from the city and surrounding villages before he met another and figured out what he became.
The woman- no, girl?- appeared young yet spoke as if she had seen countless winters, the wisdom of a million middays glowing behind her carmine eyes. She was the first person he had met who did not end up dead within the first two minutes of scenting them on the wind.
“You are a vampire. You survive purely on the life essence of others. You are still a young Deadblood. Judging by your age, you should become a Redblood soon.” She sat with her back to him, overlooking the valley below the then-unnamed Odaesan mountain that they sat perched upon. “Do you know who created you?”
“Created me?” He asked. “What do you mean? My parents?”
She turned, her vibrant red eyes continuing to shock him. Did his own orbs look like this?
“I mean, who turned you?” She seemed to look at him incredulously, shocked by his lack of knowledge. “Who gave you their venom- their shi?”
“I…” Yoongi tried very hard to remember anything before the burning sensation that scraped like rocks against the insides of his bones and flesh, but all he could see and feel was fire and agony- and then blood. He couldn’t help but think with a grain of salt, disbelieving of the method in which he was born into his new life. “I don’t know. I just remember from my first kill.”
“Strange.” The other vampire muttered, returning her gaze to the valley. “Strange, indeed.”
Yoongi was always the silent type, only interacting when he needed to as a habit formed to avoid the questioning glare of his father when he returned home late on certain occasions.
But he couldn’t help the burning desire of curiosity within him, a welcome distraction from the need to feed within him. He had so many questions.
“You may ask your questions, Min Yoongi.” The woman sighed, not even bothering to spare him a glance whilst she spoke. The man was shocked to find that she knew his name without him telling her.
“How do you know my name?” The new revelation took precedent in his mind, hoping that she was not an enemy of his clan.
“A valid question.” She mused. “Anticipated, but valid. I suppose I’ll answer your question to the best of my ability.”
Yoongi shifted his position in preparation, a new habit that he formed in his new life. He learned from the first time he moved to stretch that his body did not need to be stretched as it usually did. He never ached, never cramped, never tired, and never lost energy. Despite the lack of his emotions in their usual form, he knew that it should have been unsettling to find such a new change within him, so he did the sensible thing of pretending that he needed to.
He pretended he needed to breathe- after two hours at the bottom of a lake he stumbled upon in his aimless journey, he was amazed to find that he required no oxygen to continue existing- and that he didn’t need to sleep nor use the bathroom. He would practice taking breaths, trying to inhale and exhale evenly without becoming allured to the pungent yet undeniably attractive scent of animal blood so that he could finally smell the forest again. He pretended to go to sleep and wake up with the urge to relieve himself of the noneixstent pressure in his bladder despite not having any of the instincts he once had.
The woman spoke, answering his first question.
“I can hear your thoughts. They’re not necessarily specific, but I can hear when you are wistful- like you are now- or when you are curious or sad or angry. I can hear the causes of these emotions.” She paused. “It comes with the gift of my second life. A form of protection, if you will.”
“Why would I need protection when I am invincible? I’ve seen the things I can do and what my body can endure.” He briefly recalled repeatedly jumping from a cliff, automatically landing on his feet no matter how hard he tried not to. Before, he had a will to survive with a choice of dying, but now? There was no comprehensible choice. “There is nothing that can hurt me.”
Yoongi couldn’t help cocking his head to the side like a confused dog when the woman let out a breathless laugh.
“Because, young one,” She looked at him with her eyes again, a look of mock endearment filling them. “You are not invincible.”
For a moment, Yoongi did not believe her. He believed that the liquid running through his veins was pure ichor, an essence of the gods, but when he returned her look of sincere truth, he understood that dying was still very much possible.
Thanking the gods, Yoongi looked to the ground and began toying with his fingers at his revelation. He could stop murdering people, willing to die in order to do so.
The woman shook her head. “No, Min Yoongi. You do not have to die to stop killing humans. In fact, it is the reason I have not killed you yet. You are unaware of the possibilities.”
His head perked up at the comment, suddenly eager to learn.
“How? How can I live without killing?” All he could see was the young boy that he had murdered in cold blood; the boy’s warm brown eyes staring up at him as he watched the life drain from them burned into his memory- he didn’t even know the boy’s name. The boy could not have been older than his own sister.
“I never told you that you could continue to live without killing. Of course, you have to kill. But you do not have to kill people.” The woman nodded her head down the mount. “Do you smell that? Do you smell the life that lives throughout this mountain?”
Yoongi attempted to focus on his senses but could only feel the thirst once again tormenting his throat. As soon as the woman shifted his attention back to the aroma of life, he salivated. Of course, he smelled the animal’s scents, but he could also detect traces of human life upwind that completely took away his desire for anything but humans.
“Push the thirst aside to open your senses. Embrace them. Embrace your power and your abilities. Focus on those.”
Again, he tried to push the scorch in his throat to the side, only to find that it was an impossible feat seeing as he had not fed in several months. He wanted human blood so badly.
“Poor child. I did not realize how weak you were.” She let a grimace morph her features, the first true expression of genuine emotion that Yoongi had seen on her. “Come sit in front of me. I will help you.”
For a moment, Yoongi hesitated. Was she going to kill him? He was not sure, but after a few more thoughts to himself, he realized that he had nothing to lose. Following her direction obediently, he moved to sit with his legs crossed in front of the woman.
“Now, close your eyes and listen to my voice.” She raised her hands to his head, placing her fingertips on his temples, and began whispering while he let his eyes flutter closed.
He felt as if he was mentally hit by a charging bear.
The woman’s words echoed in his mind, seating themselves amongst every corner and crevice that they could touch before Yoongi could understand what was happening. Shocked by the feeling of being intruded upon, he tried to push back against the mind-numbing force of her words, uncomfortable and feeling violated by the sensation. Instead of stopping them, her voice just broke down his amateur attempt at a mental barrier and pushed its way further into his brain. He was helpless to her superior mental awareness and gift.
“You will not focus on the thirst. You will focus on your abilities. Focus on the blood of animals and the blood of those already dead.”
And Min Yoongi had no option but to obey for he was forced into a dieted life.
But as he stands, thousands of years later, in the middle of your kitchen whilst watching you silently with the inferno of the blazing sun in his esophagus, he couldn’t help the need that overcame him. He could not obey his mentor; miraculously and horrifyingly, the gift of his mentor did not work with you.
He was impelled by his mentor’s gift, effectively removing most of the bloodlust he had for humans. In his lifetime, after the unavoidable command was bestowed upon him, he had only killed a handful of humans when he was consumed by the thirst after living in self-induced exile for so long. But standing before you, he may have needed to add a finger to that handful depending on what you did next.
Yoongi first clocked you on his radar the moment you walked into the small coffee shop he was occupying for the later part of the morning.
Building a friendship with you was quite easy.
You were bright and warm and everything wonderful upon meeting him. Your smile was just shy of naive, yet he couldn’t help the alien tugs on his heart when watching you giggle.
“How old are you, Yoongi?” You asked while circling the straw in your caramel macchiato.
“Old enough.” He chuckled, looking down with what you perceived as shyness.
“Oh?” You laughed with him. “And how old is enough for you?”
“I could ask you the same question. How old do you think I am?” He met your eyes, once again shocking you with their beautifully vibrant shade of brown.
“Well…” You trailed off, studying his facial features closely- the hint of a permanent smile line, fresh haircut, and no wrinkles alluded that he couldn’t be over thirty. “I’m gonna say… twenty-five?”
The man across from you smiled. “Very close. I’m twenty-seven.”
So he wasn’t that much older than you. You could totally do him.
Yoongi noticed the flash of lust that ghosted through your pupils for a split second, recognizing the dilation of them as you glanced at him. He watched you stick your chest out a bit more, begin fiddling with your hair more often, and part your lips while you let the thoughts of sexual satisfaction run across your mind.
“Twenty-seven, huh? That’s not bad at all.” You smiled, letting your tongue lightly swipe along your bottom lip unconsciously.
Yoongi zeroed in on the action with a piercing gaze, watching as the muscle seemed to move in slow motion tauntingly, daring him to dig his fangs into it savagely before tearing it from your mouth to feel the blood pouring from your lips onto his face. 
His body reacted sensibly, blood rushing like fake adrenaline to awaken his better instincts- rushing everywhere- and making his jeans become uncomfortably tight as they restrained his filling manhood. 
Blood drinking was as exciting as it was satisfying for a vampire. An extremely personal and holy moment, consuming lifeblood was the most raw and sexual moment to experience. A vampire could not experience real sexual desire without it.
He dug his fingers into the faux leather of his side of the booth until they broke through the material to restrain himself from attempting to attack you in the middle of the day.
Quickly, gaining his sense of mind once again, he tore more holes into the leather to round out the punctures so that it could appear as if the holes were from wear and tear.
The scent of your blood transpierced by the hormones and adrenaline beginning to flow through your veins made it just that much more implausibly alluring. Yoongi admitted that you were a beautiful and kind woman from the conversation throughout the morning. He also knew that you had a deviant side due to the surprisingly quick appearance of your lust-filled gaze.
Yet he couldn’t help the urge to murder you on the spot.
He knew that he couldn’t touch you. The supernatural safety of the sun that shone on your body prevented him from laying a finger on your skin without his own lighting aflame. He learned the protection of sun rays on humans the hard way.
His fifth human victim, a monk who travelled the heights of Mount Odaesan- Yoongi’s sanctuary and home- for a religious trial, travelled early in the morning as the sun was rising. Yoongi smelt the sweat dripping from the man’s skin instantly. In the small cove he called home, he tried to resist the urge to kill the man for he hadn’t smelt human blood in several years.
His mentor’s words were ever present. ‘Focus on the blood of animals and the blood of those already dead.’
Despite having those words affecting his instincts, Yoongi had managed to convince himself that the monk was a dead man standing once he smelled remnants of a virus tainting his scent, effectively bypassing the impulsion of the woman’s mind control.
Yoongi found himself rushing at the man without a second thought, fangs bared and fingers curled in preparation to tear the man’s limbs from his body. However, before he could get within two feet of the vulnerable monk, he was thrown back by an invisible and boiling hot force that left him screaming in agony and flying through the air.
The monk quickly ran back down the mountain in terror, yet Yoongi could pay no mind as he lay on the forest floor, ready to die once again as his skin singed and fell from his flesh like swamp sludge.
As his throat tore itself raw from his wails of misery, his body writhed in and out on itself in complete and utter anguish. The smell of burnt flesh overwhelmed his nostrils, pungent and nauseating in every possible way. How he was able to focus on something other than the pain was beyond him.
Despite the burning, Yoongi could feel his aflame skin beginning to heal itself. Clawing through the dirt, he felt the blood stored in his stomach rushing through his veins to the broken and severed ones, rebuilding them and recreating the network of arteries necessary to begin restoring his expanse of skin.
Before long, the pain subsided and Yoongi was no longer screaming. The entire ordeal lasted approximately twenty minutes- long enough that Yoongi no longer heard the footsteps of the monk and long enough for him to process the events that had just happened. 
He was thankful that he became a Redblood with the ability to use consumed blood throughout his body, unsure of what would have happened to him if he had been a Deadblood at the time. Deadbloods burned through consumed blood quicker than a spark from a flint could ignite kindling into a flame.
He definitely needed to ask the woman, Zizi, about it. And he definitely needed to track that monk until sundown so that he could get rid of any loose ends.
Yoongi grimaced slightly, remembering the occurrence like it was yesterday, as he sat across from you.
You were still looking down at your cup in blissful unawareness of his inner turmoil and life that he’s lived thus far. You definitely were not dense enough to not notice his gaze on your skin, but you were definitely ignorant of the fact that he was thinking about what would happen if he could just get you to move a few feet to the right to gain cover from the direct line of the sun. He just needed to get you into the shadows.
“Y/N,” He called your name. You instantly looked up in response. “How old are you?”
“Old enough.” You teased him back with his own words. He let a small smile thin his lips before he looked down to hide it. When you followed his gaze and noticed that he didn’t have a drink, you jumped to the opportunity.
“Can I buy you a drink, Min Yoongi?” You asked him.
“Oh, I’m not particularly craving coffee at the moment.” He paused and held his breath, as if trying to find the words to say. “I just like to sit here sometimes and enjoy watching the street.”
“Well,” Ask him! Ask him out! Yes! Do it! Your head screamed at you to be confident. You knew he was the shy type; you would be waiting all day for him to make a move and you just didn’t have the time nor patience for that. “Let me get you a drink at my bar?”
The man looked mildly impressed for a moment. “You own a bar?”
“A small one.” You swiftly added. “It’s not a big popular one or anything but I didn’t want a place too big. I like the smaller things.”
Yoongi couldn’t help but smile. You were a kind and beautiful woman living a simple life. He dreaded the moment that he was going to have to kill you.
“I take it you’re pretty well off then?” He asks. “And please don’t take this as me digging around. I’m just curious.”
“Don’t worry about it. Yeah, actually.” You laughed and sat back in your chair, looking out the window onto the street as people and cars passed by. “I’ve always been pretty lucky for some reason. The gods always seem to be in my favor and give me what I want.”
Yoongi smirked for a moment. If she wants me, she can have me. Then, I’ll have her.
When Yoongi found himself in the prime position to attack you in your kitchen, several weeks later, he knew. He finally had you where he wanted you.
A handful of dates that he found quite pleasant were all it took. 
You turned out to be just what he thought- a strangely attractive and alluring woman, the scent of your blood aside. You exhumed an odd magnetism about you that Yoongi had never felt from a human. He regretted the decision of waiting so long to kill you seeing as he was considering letting you live. But he knew that he couldn’t do that.
With your back turned to him, busying yourself with dinner, he could easily snap your neck so that you wouldn’t scream and struggle- and you would be dead almost instantly. A quick and nearly painless death was what you deserved. He didn’t want you to suffer at all.
However, just as he crouched in preparation to lunge at you, you spoke.
“Are you ready for dinner, babe?” You asked him.
He smiled devilishly, venom filling his mouth as he salivated. “Yes, I am. I’m starving.”
You chuckled. “Okay.”
“Go and sit down at the table.”
It was the most simple of commands. Telling Yoongi to sit down wasn’t an order. You weren’t demanding him to do it. You never demanded anything of him. It was a mere suggestion in your eyes.
Yet Yoongi felt his body moving to the dinner table without a second thought, unable to resist obeying your words.
What in the everliving fuck.
He sat quickly, impotent to move from his spot while he waited for you to bring the food from the counter. His thirst obliterated his throat, causing it to seize up and restrict any air that he could previously breathe, but he sat in wonder as you seemed to hold power over him that he had never felt before.
You turned with both of your dinner plates in hand and he quickly smothered the panic on his face, wondering what in the world had just happened.
“I’m not at all a chef, but you better eat everything.” Yoongi tested your words, seeing if the inclination to finish your food was present, only to find a slight mental nudge- as he expected. You didn’t tell him to do anything; you merely made an ‘or else’ statement.
No longer desperate to kill you for the time being, Yoongi sat still and waited for your next words. Once you sat the plate in front of him, you uttered a joke.
“Dig in.”
And dig in Yoongi did. He picked up his fork and scooped into the pasta you made without any willingness to deny you.
The pasta wasn’t fantastic in any sort of the word- It was plain, although it could be due to the fact that it wasn’t at all what he truly craved and needed. It was like eating a piece of stale bread while he was offered a perfectly cooked and outright juicy steak on a silver platter. The food that he ate wouldn’t be consumed by his body and used for nutrients; the shi in his stomach would burn it to nothingness within the next few hours.
Uncontrollably, Yoongi shoved mouthful after mouthful into his mouth- he couldn’t stop. Once he finished chewing one bite, his hand was immediately bringing him another, and then another. Despite lacking the need to breathe, Yoongi felt himself suffocating with each bite as the realization that he could do nothing except eat his food settled in his mind.
“I see you were hungry.” You laughed, unaware of his predicament. Yoongi’s eyes shot up to yours and silently hoped you would give him another command so that he could stop the foolishness.
You, however, just sat there feeling sort of proud of yourself- not only for making an edible meal, but for making one Yoongi seemed to enjoy. Even though it was slightly shocking to see him out of his usually cool character, acting like a man suffering from hunger, you couldn’t help but find it undeniably cute.
Eating slowly while watching him, you let your feelings for him come to the surface.
Yoongi was utterly beautiful. His black hair that fell over his face while he was cleaning up the last bits of his plate was just long enough to cover his eyes, yet as he looked at you without reservation, you felt he had a clear line of sight straight into your soul.
His skin was nearly flawless save for the light and narrow scar that cut into his right eye. Others found the scar intimidating and ugly, but you found it rather attractive. Yoongi, with his uncanny physical allure, was undeniably the most beautiful man you had ever seen.
Your body was alight with joy and content. In the few weeks that you got to know him, liking him was incredibly easy and having him in your home, in a domestic setting, lit your heart on fire with the possibility of falling in love with him.
He was incredibly easy to love, you discovered. Everything about him begged you to fall for him. As if the universe created him just for you, Min Yoongi was the epitome of perfection- in your eyes, anyway.
Briefly, you had shown a photo of him to your mother. She became unsettled instantly by his appearance.
“He’s so pale. And a little scary-looking.” She squinted at the photo you took of him when he wasn’t looking. You never brought him up again to your mother, disliking the fact that she didn’t like your potential boyfriend and found him scary.
The picture just happened to be your favorite- being because he didn’t like pictures and it was the only one you had of him.
He kindly asked you to not take photos of him. When you prompted him as to why during one of your more intimate moments at your bar, he only answered playfully as he held you close to him, lips begging for you to kiss them.
“Because I don’t want to leave evidence.” He whispered, breath tickling your nose. His body was warm and sturdy, muscles rippling under your touch as you clung to his shoulders.
“Evidence from what?” You asked breathily. The heat in your panties had increased tenfold over the last few minutes as his eyes grew hungrier with want. Yoongi’s fingers dug into your waist painfully, pulling you so close that you barely had room to expand your lungs to breathe, yet you couldn’t help the edgy feeling of how rough he could be with you.
“From when I eat you up.”
Thinking back on the memory, you shivered involuntarily, hoping that tonight might be the night you actually get to have him. He’d made you wait for a little over a month and you had no idea why. You definitely felt him straining through his pants a few times. But no kisses or anything further than the pressing of your bodies was accomplished.
Yoongi finished his plate and sat upright briskly, pulling you from your wishful thinking with a jump.
“Y/N,” He nearly growled, shocking you. “What else do you want me to do?”
The fork you were holding clattered to your plate instantly. Wow. He’s sizzling hot.
“I-“ You stuttered a bit. “I- uh.”
“Spit it out.” He hissed. You jumped again, trying to find the words to say with the heat growing in your panties.
Quickly, you answered him. “I want you to take me to my bedroom.”
“Thank god.” He groaned, getting up slowly with a smirk on his face. “Is that just a request? Because I can walk out now if you don’t actually want this.”
“Take me to my bedroom, Yoongi.” You stood slowly, carefully, as if you were afraid to trigger him.
Yoongi pushed in his chair and moved towards you at a speed that was almost inhuman. You yelped in astonishment as Yoongi attempted to control himself- he couldn’t bring you to your bedroom at his natural speed or else he would have a very motion-sick human to worry about. Instead, he trembled with the effort to resist your command at full force, knowing that the only way it was possible was due to the fact that he was still, in fact, taking you to your bedroom.
Picking you up was easier than breathing. You weighed absolutely nothing in his arms because of his advanced strength, so when he felt you trying to assist him in carrying you by holding your body stiffly, he huffed out a laugh whilst he walked.
“Relax, woman. You are as light as a feather.”
You blushed under his words, leaning into his chest to hide your cheeks.
“Stop that.” He growled, entering your bedroom. You looked up at him and he couldn’t tear his eyes from the blood that rushed to your cheeks. “I can’t resist if you do that.”
“Then don’t.” You whispered. Your heart pounded in your chest, begging him to hear it. “Don’t resist.”
His fangs came forth immediately, for he could not resist your command while he flew to your bed to throw you down. Despite your unknowing of what you were telling him to do, he fostered no opposition to what he was about to do.
The roughness of his throw startled you for a moment as you looked up at his vastly approaching figure, only to grow terrified when you caught sight of his face.
The veins protruding out of his temples and cheeks pumped blood straight into the whites of his eyes, turning them completely bloodshot, as they framed the now-crimson irises. Long incisors protruded from his mouth as he opened it with a hiss, revealing the way his human teeth shifted apart to allow his inhuman ones to break through the gums. Instantly, you parted your lips to scream.
Yoongi was upon you instantly, hand covering your mouth and silencing your cry while he snarled menacingly, yet he couldn’t help but feel remorse for killing you.
“I’m sorry.” He whimpered through his animalistic demeanor. “I can’t stop.”
You were screaming below his hand and, instantaneously, he had an idea.
He was leaning forward slowly, able to slow himself in the process of not resisting you. “Y/N,” He strained, changing the frequency of his talent, and waited for you to silence yourself in order to listen to him. He took his hand off of your mouth slowly after he heard your heart calm itself past your weeping. “Tell me to stop.”
“Stop!” You sobbed whilst clawing at his chest and kicking at his legs. “Don’t kill me!”
Not a second passed before Yoongi flew off of you, throwing his back to your wall with a loud thud while he cursed lowly.
You scrambled to the headboard of your bed, pressing your back against it in an attempt to gain some distance between the two of you. Your eyes were wide, chest heaving with your breath short, as you looked at the man in front of you.
“I-“ Yoongi stuttered for the first time in decades. “I’m sorry.”
“Your eyes!” Your burst out. You were unable to contain your fear and shock, so you displaced it into your curiosity. “Y-your- Your face! Your teeth!”
Yoongi stood against the wall, breathing just as hard as you, with his eyes cast to the floor in the process of trying to control his facial features. He could no longer kill you. The thought revolted him- every time he considered drinking your blood, the idea was banished from his mind with a sense of nausea following. Good god. She is unaware of her ability yet I am completely at her mercy.
“I apologize. I couldn’t help myself.” He breathed. What Yoongi forgot to take into account was the fact that he began implementing the gift of his second life on you the moment he stepped foot through your threshold, so your mind was completely scrambled by this point.
It was nighttime now; he could not leave your house no matter how hard he tried. He knew of the fallacy that vampires needed to be invited in and he found himself giggling from time to time at how close humans got to the actual lore of his kind.
He could enter your house, uninvited, during the day. He could lurk every corner of your abode without a bother, yet when night fell and the sun finally set, he would be stuck inside until morning. He knew he would be staying the night in your house the moment he agreed to have dinner with you. If he attempted to enter through your door during the night, however, he would have no luck- the night’s protection would convince his brain to walk away from your home without any further reconsideration until he was a good distance from it.
He was in the first position now.
He wished that he could leave you and disappear from your life without a trace so that you could live a peaceful and happy life without him, but he was afraid that it was impossible now with sundown a mere two hours prior. Your powers were no match for the natural protection of the earth. The both of you had a long night ahead of yourselves.
So he used his ability. Yoongi gave you control- rational thought, rather. His gift allowed him to grant organization of the mind and precise focus to others, but he could also take it away.
Upon entering your home, he began the process of slowly but surely ebbing away your barriers and logical thought- he couldn’t do it too fast or else you would panic like you were now. With a presently impossible-to-kill human whose heart was beating out of her chest and a command to not kill you forcing him into submission, he was obligated to prevent you from having a heart attack that was caused by him.
With laser-like focus, he channeled his gift straight into your open mind. Yoongi rebuilt the walls he had previously broken down over the past few hours, restocked your jumbled thoughts into their proper spaces, and flowed his energy through each corridor of judicious conception so that you could continue to develop your focus into that of supernatural proportion. He hoped that you, with a new mind, would tell him to get away from you and to kill himself. Dying by the hands of such a robust ability wouldn’t be too bad of a way to go.
You, however, never had such a decisive mind. Your mind was never clearer and you had never felt such clarity in your thoughts before. It allowed you to feel the magnetism that he radiated.
You knew he was a vampire. You don’t remember how you knew or how you recognized it, but you knew that he was not the first of his kind you had come across. Maybe it was the obvious fangs that gave it away.
“Yoongi,” You whispered. “You’re a vampire.”
His eyes, now back to their normal gorgeously coffee-bean shade, flicked up to yours in surprise.
“You know what I am?” He spluttered, flabbergasted. “You don’t think I’m a demon? Or the devil?”
“I’m not stupid. I know a vampire when I see one.” Your tone did not waver nor shake despite being a potential victim to a vampire. Was it the adrenaline?
“Then you know that I am a danger to you.” He said lowly, shock still evident on his face, while he began gravitating towards your bedroom door to leave.
“No. Stay.” You found yourself pining for his presence while he froze up in his spot. You eyed the action analytically. “If you were a danger to me, I wouldn’t be alive right now. You had plenty opportunity to kill me.”
“That’s the thing,” His hands pressed to the wall and scratched into it with the effort to move further from you. “I don’t have much of a choice anymore.”
“And why is that?” You relaxed your body and slowly slid your way across the bed towards him.
“Because I can’t.” Yoongi actually gasped for air as you stood from your bed to slowly approach him. “Y/N. Don’t come near me.”
“Why don’t you have a choice?” You ignored his warning, fully aware of the risk you were taking yet uncaring of the consequences. You were too focused on the fact that you actually wanted him.
Yoongi could not move from his spot, a side effect of your command to stay, but he refused to meet your eyes. The irresistible scent of your blood clashing with the order to not kill you fucked with his mind in ways he never experienced, creating an excruciatingly splitting headache between his temples. He wanted to drink from you so bad yet he could not move a single muscle.
“You can tell me to do anything. You can tell me to stay away from you. You can tell me to leave you alone. Hell, you can tell me to kill myself and I’d do it.” He ground out, attempting to press his back further into the wall as he felt your body heat against his skin. You came too close. He could smell your hormones lacing through your blood, triggering a wash of his shi over his dry tongue and a yearning to tear you apart overriding his senses.
He wanted to sink his fangs into your flesh so badly that he was beginning to scare himself. Allowing his venom to seep into your system would undoubtedly send you into ecstasy; you would only feel a pinch of pain as his saliva instantly burned through your nerves and set them alight. He could kill you while you were in pleasure; you wouldn’t feel anything but bliss as he drained the life from you.
“And why do you, a powerful creature such as yourself, allow me to have this power over you?” You asked. Was he in love with you? You definitely could love the man with how much you felt drawn to him but, for crying out loud, it had only been a few weeks.
“I don’t allow it. You are a gifted human. You possess this power over me.” Although Yoongi enjoyed having a calm conversation with you, he couldn’t help but feel bad that he used his gift on you. It was almost an unfair playing card- a “get-out-of-jail” card.
Because you should be running, terrified and screaming, even with his ability active in your mind. Maybe he had used it too much? Yoongi recalled the one time he went overboard with his gift, driving a man to suicide as he focused too much on the meaning of life and the regretful things he had done. Immediately concerned, Yoongi reached out a mental tether- a rare talent amongst his kind- to gauge your stability.
What he found, instead, was a dark and curling line attaching to his, pulling it in as quickly as Yoongi offered it. Before he could reel back away from it, it was fully intertwined and pulling his line to attach to you, only to rear back and completely obliterate his senses when it entered his head.
No. No no no. It’s impossible.
Yoongi was moving forward and caging you against the bed at full speed before he could stop himself, nestling his body between your eagerly opening legs as a hiss escaped his lips. Immediately, he realized that he broke through your command unwavered. The thirst came back at full force when you moaned from the friction on your heat.
“You’re-“ He tested the sensation of true, sexual arousal with a slow grind of himself into you, gasping with a jerk of his dick when his action squeezed his member between his body and yours. “You’re my-“
You moaned again, sitting up slightly to try and capture his lips with your own, unable to control the desire that surmounted in your heart. When he resumed his look of shock, backing away from your advance so that he could look at where your bodies touched, you spoke through the heady emotion. “I’m your what?”
“It can’t be.” He whispered. After a single beat, he leaned down and pressed his lips to yours with a crushing pressure that split your lip instantly.
The pain seared across your bottom lip and distracted you for a moment, emitting a groan deep in your throat that he matched when the taste of your blood exploded onto his tastebuds. Instead of swallowing it like he wanted to, he brought a hand to your chin and opened your lips to spit your blood, along with his venom, back into your mouth so that it would take your pain away.
For a moment, you held the mix of liquids on your tongue, unsure of what to do as no one had ever spit in your mouth before. You looked up to him with confusion extremely evident in your arched brows.
“Swallow it.” He growled.
The taste of iron and an almost sugary sweet tang of saliva was too strong for you to keep sitting on your tongue, so you did as he told you to before he kissed you again to repeat the same action. Slowly, you got into the rhythm of swallowing what he gave you.
Before long, he simply gave you his tongue, allowing you to suck the saliva from his mouth greedily. You didn’t understand why, but the taste was addicting and adding to the pulsing feeling that radiated between your legs. Were you getting lightheaded? No. This sensation was much more blissful and exciting.
He pulled away after sucking on your wounded lip once more, spitting the mixture into your awaiting mouth for a final time before sitting up to look down at your body.
His venom was already taking effect. He could smell it on your skin as it flowed through your veins and filled your system just like a virus would. It would be simple to turn you at this point. You would be his for eternity, bonded to him in ways only the Fated One of a vampire would. Yoongi shook the thought from his head as he wasn’t even sure that you were, indeed, his.
“What am I to you?” You asked genuinely, swollen lip slightly obstructing your speech.
“Don’t worry about that right now, Y/N. Right now, I am going to fuck you, okay?” He met your gaze with his dark eyes filled with confidence, knowing that you would be unable to deny him if his belief was true.
“Yes. Yes, please Yoongi.” You breathed, begging him almost drunkenly. “Please. I’m yours.”
His mind was nudged forward by a different force this time, warranting unknown instincts to play into action.
He felt his center of gravity shift. His skin grew tight and uncomfortable around his body from the emotion that wished to burst through the surface. He breathed with you. Perfectly aligned were your rhythms; his heart soared alongside your own galloping one, desperate to match you in every aspect. The sensations in his body were difficult to ignore as he felt the ancient and sacred pull of a bond lacing itself through his limbs.
Instead of pondering over the reality of it any further, he slid his hand from your chin to your shirt and pinched the fabric between his fingers. You nodded in reassurance.
Your clothes tore form your body like paper. Wrapping his fingers around your arm to keep your body in place, Yoongi ripped your thin blouse from you easily. Your breasts, made plump by the bra you wore, caught his attention the moment they were revealed. Perfect.
Instead of looking like a moron seeing exquisite breasts for the first time, he moved his hand to your dress pants so that he could rid your body of them. In under ten seconds, Yoongi had you almost bare below him. Perfect.
Not even realizing it until you brought your thumb to his lips to swipe his shi from the corner of his mouth, Yoongi shook his head at the fact that the sight of you wriggling and bare-skinned beneath him made him literally drool, but his instincts went haywire when he watched you place your thumb in your mouth to suck his venom off yourself with a low moan of appreciation at the taste.
Yoongi’s hands couldn’t move faster as he tore the clothes from his body, stripping himself bare to reveal himself to you. He wanted to give you everything. To open his mind and spread everything out for you to see- he hoped you could handle it.
You, on the other hand, were laying below him with the desperate need to have him inside you.
You wanted him everywhere. You wanted him to sink himself into you- it seemed to be the only fathomable option. You wanted him to hold you and kiss you and surround you with everything him.
As you stared up at him with a needy look in your eyes, you couldn’t help but want him in every facet possible.
You saw yourself making love to him, holding him, kissing him- loving him. The new sensation brought on you by the psychic connection- that was all you could call it when you felt the mental attachment- brung passionate emotions through your body in an onslaught that you could barely handle. It was too much to deal with without him inside you to be with you through it yet you didn’t know if you could handle what would follow.
Yoongi could smell you through your panties; a delicious scent of the most raw tease he had ever allowed himself to indulge in. Unable to help himself, he moved down your body quickly, throwing your legs open- rather roughly- to give himself room to press his nose straight into your heat. Your aroma filled his nose as he expanded his lungs, triggering his natural instincts to push out his fangs and load his vision with blood to enhance it despite his eyes being closed. Fuck, he wanted to consume you.
You keened at the contact, closing your thighs around his head to trap him there. You felt his groan vibrate on you, driving you closer to the brink of insanity.
Without any further time wasted, he grabbed onto your panties and ripped them from you to expose your pulsating pussy to his mouth without moving his nose away from your intoxicating scent. Not a beat passed before he dug his tongue into you to scoop up your DNA-laced juices. Fuck.
Yoongi lost himself in you immediately. You whined out a small cry, unable to keep yourself from grabbing onto his hair and yanking when all you felt were his lips and tongue laving over your opening relentlessly. There was no skill nor technique in his movements; he was simply devouring you without a mind to pay attention to your bundle, yet you couldn’t stop the sensitivity from boggling your mind and driving you to an instant orgasm.
His hands squeezed your thighs around his head and, for a brief moment, he opened his eyes to look at you. The color of his eyes staring back at you was unexpected- a solid, snow white color filled his orbs and contrasted starkly with the red hue of his engorged veins and bloodshot scleras.
“Yoongi,” You whimpered from another swipe of his tongue and suck from his lips. “Y-Your eyes.”
He pulled away from you instantly at the comment, eyes widening and wet mouth hanging agape, while you let out a groan of relief- or sadness- at the lack of attention to your incredibly sensitive core.
“What color are they?” He asked.
“White.” You struggled to speak, voice cracking under the post-orgasm glow.
He took a moment to look down at your heaving body and messy pussy, jerking forward slightly at the sight of your delicious juice smeared all over your thighs. Once he had a handle on his thirst again, Yoongi met your eyes as the white faded from his irises. “Then you are her.”
“I’m who?” You reached for him, needing to hold him anywhere you could get your hands on. Yoongi caught this action immediately, the same desire to grasp you evident in his hand rushing to meet yours. It was natural to intertwine your fingers while he leaned over you to press his lips to yours in a short, uncharacteristically loving kiss.
“You are my Fated One- my mate. You hold my soul in the palm of your hand, as I do yours.” He murmured, feathering his lips over yours as he spoke.
Under normal circumstances, you don’t think you’d be able to comprehend his words with your current position with him. You were exposed to him and he was exposed to you, making you feel vulnerable and turned on beyond belief. Yoongi was reaching behind you to unclasp your bra while you took in what he had said. His thumb was brushing over your bare nipple before your bra even hit the floor.
“So-” You had to clear your throat again. “So you’re mine? Like, completely?”
He chuckled warmly at your question and you couldn’t stop yourself from reciprocating the smile.
“Yes, Y/N, I am yours.” He brought his hand down to grip your thigh and move it to the side. “I belong to you.”
Yoongi placed his dick against your folds and you watched him so do. You felt his tip capture onto your clit several times as he lathered it with your arousal languidly, preparing himself so that he could slide into you easier. “However,”
“However?” You looked up at him with a questioning look accentuated by your eyebrows.
“You are also mine.” Yoongi stopped his movement so that the head of his cock finally caught onto your opening, kickstarting your heart into a pace that you were afraid would kill you. “Do you understand that?”
He didn’t wait for you to answer.
Torturously, he began to push inside you. You widened your legs to accompany his approaching hips. As you warbled out a cry when he decided to drop his control and fill you completely in the next second, Yoongi began speaking again.
“Do you understand that everything about you,” He reared back and pushed inside you again, forcing your legs open to take him while he did so. “-is mine?”
You couldn’t respond. Your emotions were running rampant with your mind overflowing from too much stimuli while he fucked you. He spoke again without your reply and you could only pull him closer to you and take the feeling of his cock caressing your insides.
“Your lips,” Thrust. “your eyes,” Thrust. “your hair, your hands, your skin;” He punctuated each part of your body with a ram of his dick into you. “Everything, Y/N.”
Yoongi took a moment to look down at your joining bodies, smirking softly at the sight of how easily he slid inside. “-Especially this greedy little cunt of yours.”
You watched his smirk drop while he bit his lip and ground himself into you, lips parting again with a low moan whilst keeping his gaze transfixed on the sinful sight. You watched him in awe as his cock plunged so deep that it felt like it was in your throat.
He snapped his eyes to yours quickly, repeating his prior question. “Do you understand?”
Expecting to be interrupted by a thrust, you sucked your bottom lip in your mouth and braced yourself, only to be grabbed by the neck while he leaned down to bring you face-to-face. You could no longer breathe as he pulled his lips back to reveal his fangs. “I asked you if you understood, Y/N.”
With your airway restricted, you could only nod with your lip still stuck between your teeth. Did you taste blood? Promptly, you remembered that Yoongi busted your lip, yet you were confused as to why you hadn’t felt the pain of it since he first kissed you.
“And are you okay with that?” Yoongi began to nose his way down your neck once he turned your head to the side and slowed the rhythm of his hips. Right before you could answer, he released your neck to look at your face, allowing a large rush of air to enter your lungs just as you were attempting to give him an answer.
“Yes!” You released your lip to scream out at the welcome sensation of oxygen and the feel of his dick pushing it right back out of you. “I’m yours! Everything is yours!”
“Good, my love. Good.” He whispered, smiling down at you. His smile was wiped clean off his face in a heartbeat, his thrusts into you completely ceased, as he zeroed in on your lips. You licked them subconsciously, immediately tasting blood and internally cringing at the flavor of iron coating your tongue.
Yoongi attached his lips around your bottom one quickly and you felt him suck it into his mouth. Your walls squeezed tightly around his at the sensation of his tongue swiping over the spli in your engorged lip again and again. You knew that your lip would be swollen yet you couldn’t find yourself to care because it, surprisingly, didn’t hurt at all. The small bits of Yoongi’s saliva that slipped into your mouth were enough to keep you on edge, tasting like raw sugar at that point.
He began moving inside you again, starting a slow and steady pace. You whimpered into his mouth as he began taking his fill of your blood and you mirrored his thirst with the need to taste his mouth again. Your lips pressed closer to his in order to, hopefully, get a bit more of his spit.
You felt your orgasm building laggardly. It was creeping in at a speed that you were able to prepare yourself for your ascent towards ecstasy. You tightened your legs around his waist and dug your heels into the globes of his ass, pulling him in.
It wasn’t until you were bordering on your climax that Yoongi pulled away from your lip with your pop and sat up to focus on fucking you, his peace of mind obviously waning.
You saw it in his face; you saw the way he couldn’t control his veins from darkening his face; you saw the way his eyes burned white and the way he was attempting to hold himself back from attacking you.
So you did him a favor.
“Yoongi.” You mumbled past your swollen lip. “Bite me.”
Min Yoongi had no option but to obey your command.
He surged forward, pressing himself against your clit deliciously and bottoming out as he lunged for your neck with his fangs fully protruded and a warbled hiss scratching its way out of his throat. With barely enough time to prepare, you bared your neck to him once more and clutched onto his arms for dear life, hoping it wouldn’t hurt too bad.
What you weren’t expecting was for it to feel unreservedly good.
The sensation took you by surprise, warranting a loud moan to escape from your lips before you could stop it. Why did his fangs feel so good in your flesh? It should definitely be hurting. But all you could do was moan and whine like a madwoman as you felt his lips close over the puncture wounds and begin to drink your blood straight from your flesh. His tongue continuously swiped over the teeth marks in your neck, keeping them clear from your body’s natural ability to scar itself and begin blocking the escaping blood. Every lick he delivered sent a pulse straight to your clit and an automatic instinct to tighten yourself around him.
Your pussy quivered around him uncontrollably. You were so close to cumming that you could practically taste the release on your tongue. In the few moments that Yoongi took his sips from your body, his slow propulsions forward into you had become more rough and insistent- as if he was trying to split you in two. Even as you felt your life essence leave your body, you were being filled time and time again by his cock at a deep and passionate rhythm.
At the first sign of getting lightheaded from blood loss, you came- hard.
Your juices squirted around him every time he reared himself back and your eyes rolled to the back of your head while you craned your neck back into your very-bloody pillow. With no where to go, unable to still him with his supernatural strength, you were only able scream out his name.
His speed increased through your orgasm and your sweet exclamations of pure bliss drove Yoongi into a lunatic, freeing himself of control and using his uncanny speed to fuck into you. Your extremely drenched pussy, still convulsing around him was battered and raw, yet he could not find it in himself to care as he desperately surged into you over and over again so that he could fill you with the cum of several centuries. Picturing the image of your cunt spewing his release from it had him closing his jaws and pulling on your wounds harder to get more blood from you.
He knew that he couldn’t drain you. Hearing the pulse of your heart weaken slightly was enough to make him detach his teeth and lick over your wound so that his shi could assist it in healing- it would be completely sealed and unblemished in the next few hours. Instead of worrying too much about your neck, he reared back to look down at you again while he grabbed onto your hips with fervor.
You saw the drops of blood running down from Yoongi’s mouth and chin drip onto your breasts and stomach, creating an erotic and utterly unwholesome image of carnage and horror on your body, but you were unable to help yourself in feeling unsettlingly drawn to the wicked image. With a new flash of desire exploding through your body and reawakening your lust, you reached up and grabbed his neck, pulling him back down to trap him in your embrace.
The oversensitivity of your last orgasm was enough to send you hurtling to the edge of another orgasm- You just needed his fangs in you one more time. Silently begging for it, you kept your grip on his nape and softly nudged him back in the direction of your neck.
Yoongi was close. You could tell. But even past his stupor, he spoke.
“Y/N. I can’t. I took too much.” He almost whined with need, struggling to form words past his fangs.
“Just-“ Your body jolted wildly as he desperately tried to cum. “Just do it!”
Yoongi was able to deny your command, which he figured was due to not being a specific one, yet he couldn’t bring himself to leave it unanswered as his body built in preparation to release.
“I fucking can’t!” He was close to roaring at this point, gums aching to meet your flesh as he pressed his fangs into you and filled you with his essence. He wanted to so badly.
“Drink from me, dammit!” Your eyes were welling with tears of frustration, needing that small push from him to make you orgasm again- his dick hammering your cervix was too much to handle without that small bit of pain to ground you. And without hesitation nor the choice to deny you, he did.
Your orgasms were perfectly in sync as he placed his fangs back into your wounds, delicious blood spilling across his tongue once again. Liquid life. It was the perfect few words for how you tasted.
Your pussy ached with the force of how tight you squeezed around him and Yoongi groaned lowly against your neck as he pressed himself so tightly to you that you knew his hands would be leaving bruises on your hips and ass.
“Yoongi.” You sobbed as his cum filled you, pulsing spurt after warm spurt of the hot liquid onto your abused cervix. The thought of him taking your blood while he gave you his cum was too sinful for you to bear, an outburst of emotion causing you to chant his name over and over again. Never before in your life had you felt so complete and free.
You could feel your blood levels draining as you slowly came down from your climax, knowing that you would not be awake for much longer if he kept drinking.
“That’s enough.” You whispered tiredly, head becoming truly lightheaded. Yoongi, unable to rescind his teeth from your neck, kept drinking from you as the thirst and aggression of the first mating actuated his movements. “Yoongi.”
He tried to pull away- he really did- but the feeling of your blood coating his tastebuds was like finding a quarry in the middle of the Sahara Desert. He lacked the true thirst for humans for thousands of years- and now he was suffering the polydipsia for blood all over again.
“Yoongi, stop.” You commanded, testing your supposed ‘power.’
Yoongi ceased to drink from you yet his fangs were still embedded in your skin, vibrating with pleasure and need. As he stopped, he couldn’t help but whine and then growl savagely with want. The vibration of of his throaty sound in your flesh did things to your body. Unable to resist the temptation, your body clenched involuntarily around his softening cock.
Yoongi groaned again, retracting his fangs and face from your neck, and sat up once more to look at your body. With a slow hand, he stuck out his index and middle finger to smear the droplets of blood on your stomach in small circles aimlessly, picturing you as a canvas made just for him to ruin. “You’re quite the minx, aren’t you?”
“What do you mean?” You giggled deliriously, needing sleep as soon as possible.
“I mean,” Yoongi reached down to smear a droplet of blood across your hip before digging his thumb and fingers into the bone and the flesh of your ass harshly. “Your cunt is playing games with me right now.”
“How so?” You tilted your head to the side in mock confusion.
The vampire pressed his lips into a thin line and sighed almost disdainfully. You gasped as you felt his dick jerk within you, filling to stiffness once more and awakening a new cloud of lust despite the exhaustion you felt. “Well, if you want to play clueless, you can play clueless. We have eternity to teach you how to not play games with me, my mate.”
For eternity? You kind of liked the sound of that.
~#~
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septiembrre · 3 years
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I'm a little late but I just saw your post from a year ago about latinx rep in good girls and its sad reflecting back on it and how the show could've done better. Rio was just another stereotype, I hate how he was ambitiously latino and there was just no connection to his culture. Was he first, 2nd, or 3rd Gen? If he was 1st Gen it didn't make sense to have the family speak English. One thing that always annoyed me is how OOC he was at times and how the writers purposely made him out to be like some brown aggressive misogynistic man. They didn't bother making him complex. In a way I'm glad the show got canceled. As a Mexican woman the way Rio was written was racist.
Wah, I’ve been sitting on answering your ask. I wanted to tease your ask apart and respond to it sentence by sentence. But... my brain kept rechazandolo, so now I have feelings dump instead.
Since Good Girls ended, I have been parsing through how I feel about S4 and GG overall — sometimes more positively, sometimes more negatively. Then, I flip to reminding myself it’s not that serious (it's just tv! this is supposed to be my leisure activity!). Then, I waffle back to reflecting.
So, no textual analysis just feels and whining under the cut. I know folks are still mourning the end of the show and I don't want to yuck anyone's yum. Tagging with #ggnegativity.
My short answer is that Good Girls is my beloved, sometimes joyful, sometimes hurtful, complicated little show. Even now that we’re no longer getting new episodes I’m wary of sifting through the information we have about Rio because it’s a mess and it seems like a lot of his character was poorly thought out (ahem, all those dumb messages from Bill Krebs confirming multiple instances of lack of intentionality or care!).
I say this because I was tempted to start responding to you by riffing off of your comment with, “y'know, now that you say that, I think he’s third or fourth gen…”, pero who cares? And the point was never specifically about what gen he is, or even more specifically about... lol, I was going to say it doesn't matter what nationality he was, they just needed to pick one. Ugh, but the wording of that is too glib. The lack of intentionality behind these details feels sanitized to me, it feels very white gaze, it feels lazy.
However, I could have forgiven a lot of this weak character construction if his baseline, plot-related characterization on-screen was more consistent. But, Rio was often used as a plot device in a way that often fell flat for me, a weekly recurring bogeyman whether his antagonism made sense or not. On one hand, I feel for the creative team, because I think they were in a hard place, trying to avoid romanticizing Rio, and trying to seemingly backtrack the sexualization of him in Season 2, but... Idk, it's complicated.
Retrospectively, it’s sitting with me how much Good Girls is rooted in whiteness. While it's something I discerned before (lol, most obviously with 2x13 and in S3 with Lucy's disposability), you know how some shows get to their third or fourth season and finally start investing in their marginalized characters? It’s a crappy thing to hold out hope for, they're crumbs! But, I was. And we did get some Rio worldbuilding. But, ultimately, it felt weak to me -- under-conceptualized or under-worked.
For example, I liked Nick as a Bigger Bad who drove Rio and Beth together. I also thought that Nick's non-existent moral code was a lovely foil to Rio's, and that this contrast humanized Rio in a way that he needed. It also cast a new light on Rio's behavior of the earlier seasons, outside of Beth's perception in a way that I thought was healthy and needed. Great, meaty stuff! However, Nick and Rio's relationship came across as shallow to me. There really did not seem to be a lived-in quality to their scenes. The show really struggled with that element overall -- even with the three lead protagonists (their decades-long history with each other and interactions between their families being largely absent). I wonder why they made that choice.
It's strange because on the flip side we got a hefty amount of contextualization for MLM guy Vance and Annie's bf Kevin... Even that cop who Mick killed! All white men, too.
Me da pena.
Or maybe the thing that bothers me is that those scenes between Nick and Rio didn't center Rio's perspective effectively? Despite the one-on-one scenes being outside of Beth's framing (Rio being a secondary character typically tethered to Beth's story arc), there still was a lot of distance between Rio and the viewer? Like I think of Vance in his kitchen with his wife and child, and the way we as viewers were brought into that to empathize with him, and I think of the distance of Nick+Rio boxing scene or the scenes at the bar. Argh! It's hard to pinpoint without the textual analysis I feel too grumpy to do. It was such a narrative choice to keep Rio aloof and I side-eye it.
Anyway --
Overall, the writing room/show creators/decision-makers didn't seem to consider Latine/x/a/o viewers throughout the crafting of Good Girls and that sucks. It really feels like I'm being told to conform to the white gaze in watching the show, and after 2x13 that makes me feel prickly and defensive. A part of me yearns to do a rewatch to map Rio’s character (and inconsistencies) but I still yield joy from Good Girls — it’s been my main comfort story during the pandemic. I also rendered joy from Season 4 specifically — some of those scenes between the leads at the end were phenom!!
I am leaning into what's bringing me joy right now, so I feel hesitant to stew in critique, even while I also feel some sort of need to make sense of the hurtful racializations. I have a compulsion to write them all down on the same post or list -- somewhere where I can see them all at once and understand. But, at the moment, it’s not a use of my time and energy that feels good. Opting into fics and writing is bringing me a lot of joy during hard times.
I have to close with one final whine, that I am SO fatigued with television options right now. I find myself desperately wishing for more TV out there whose priority audience isn't only white folks. Good Girls isn't alone in its treatment of Latinx characters, or alone in mishandling characters of color or gay characters, or prioritization of empathy for white het male characters, but certainly, creating something more thoughtful shouldn't be so hard.
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justakpopfic · 5 years
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Vampire Coven
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Summary: Having a fascination with vampires, y/n ventures out to find one. Once they do, they find themselves deep in their coven...
Genre: It’s not fluff, but it’s also not really angst. Idk how to describe it. Vampire!au
Word count: 1.5k
A/N: This is the first actual self insert fic I wrote. Let me know what you think of it!
Masterlist
*
It didn’t take a genius to know that you were making a very stupid decision. But you couldn’t help yourself. After your father had passed away, you picked up his passion on cryptology, the study of mythical creatures. The creature that fascinated you the most?
Vampires.
So much research went into them, and yet no matter how many books and blogs you consumed, you wanted to learn more. Why do they need human blood? Are they really weak to garlic, and if so why? Are they truly immortal? So many questions and more.
Therefore, you packed up your late father’s research, only the essentials for living, and you moved from your old home. You went from a bustling metropolis to a quaint town, set next to a forest, rumoured to have vampires.
“You’re mad,” a bartender said, as you told him why you had come to their unknown town. “And you possibly have a death wish.”
“I know,” you said. “But I’ve come prepared. I know how to defend myself.”
“Still don’t understand why you’re so into these mythical creatures. I’ve lived here all my life, never seen one.”
“Well, have you ever been in the woods at night?” You asked.
The bartender left momentarily, serving a new customer some beer. When he came back he said, “Of course not. No sane man goes into the woods unprepared at night.”
“Have people gone in there at night?” You asked, leaning forward.
“Yes. They have. But don’t go thinking that it was because of vampires. Most were simply drunk idiots. That’s why they moved the bar to the other side of town.”
“That’s smart,” you said mainly to yourself. “Well, thank you for the drink.” You placed some money on the counter. “I’ve got some vampires to find.”
“If you come back alive, tell me everything about it,” the bartender said. “And possibly about how you were wrong.”
“We’ll see about that,” you said as you exited into the dark night.
The bartender was right. It was a long walk to the woods. The town was silent. Only the sounds of your footsteps could be heard as you walked through the dead village. You almost wondered if it was a town completely for monsters. The black windows created shadows that weren’t there. The street lamps casted a mythical glow onto the streets.
Soon, the forest came into vision. The trees stood pitch black against the dark blue sky. Dead silence wafted through the streets and forest. The wind didn’t even whisper to you, warning you to turn around. No, the darkness of the unknown only excited you more. You walked in, letting the pitch black overtake you.
Twigs snapped and broke under your boots. Leaves rustled in disagreement as you walked. The woods seemed abandoned. Not a single shred of life could be found.
You eventually found a clearing. The trees opened up to the sky, revealing the gems of space, and a full moon, painting the woods in the softest white. Yes, this would be the perfect place to set up camp.
Your “camp” was very simple. A tiny tent large enough for one body, and that was it. It took longer than you expected, since you were in the dark.
You lit a match, the yellow light clashing with the darkness. You reached into a small lantern, lighting it up, and illuminating the clearing with an endearing shine.
You picked up your dagger and journal, setting off back into the woods. You left the lantern with you, so you would find your way back.
Back into silence, you trekked through the woods. You investigated every corner and looked behind every tree. You couldn’t find any sign of life, not even the plants felt alive. Maybe it was the illusion of nighttime, or maybe this place was darker than you expected.
You walked blindly through the woods. You tried to minimize the noise you were making, but it was nearly impossible.
“I don’t understand,” you said to yourself. “Surely, I’d find some form of life here.”
“I’m not sure if I’m what you’d call, alive.”
You turned around. Red eyes stared straight into your soul. You screamed, stumbling back. Your foot caught on a twig, sending you to the ground.
You groaned in pain, and tried to get up immediately. But the shadowy figure in front of you placed their foot on your chest. You tried to get up again, but you were held down by the shadow.
You were left to look up and see your captor. A shadowy figure with red eyes. They must be a vampire. You thought. You squirmed in their hold. You kicked the shadow as hard as you could, but they caught your leg before you could even make an impact.
“You really are a difficult one, aren’t you?” The shadow asked. Their voice was soft, almost too pure for the eyes that it possessed. If you weren’t trapped, you might’ve fallen for that voice alone.
“I’m not going to hurt you, if you let me go,” you said, desperately trying to escape.
“I don’t think you understand, little one,” the shadow said.
“Understand what?”
The moon pierced through the tree branches. The shadow took a step forward, into the moonlight. You gasped.
The shadow was a man. A handsome man at that. A handsome man with slicked back hair, pale skin, and red eyes.
You were entranced for a second before you remembered that you were trapped. You tried to roll to the side, but the man grabbed you by the arms.
You were lifted up harshly, meeting the strangers glowing eyes. You got a close up of his face. You couldn’t deny how beautiful he was. The mans mouth opened slowly, and you saw them. His fangs.
“I knew it,” you said in a hushed voice. “I knew it!”
“Knew what?” The man said.
“You’re a vampire!”
“Yes, and you’re my next victim.” The vampire opened his mouth wider, leaning in towards you. He closed his eyes, and that’s when you kicked him in the gut. The vampire buckled over in pain. You took the opportunity and ran for your life.
You didn’t even run a meter before the vampire appeared before you. You stopped in your tracks, frozen.
“You can teleport?” You said in amazement.
“No, that’s supernatural speed, darling,” the vampire said.
“Do you guys have other powers?”
“Hypnosis. Some of us have super strength. We can also transform into bats—wait, why do you care?”
“Well you see, handsome vampire, I’m a cryptologist,” you said.
“A what?”
“Cryptologist,” you repeated. “Someone who studies mythical creatures. Like, fairies, nymphs, vampires...”
“It sounds more like you’re trying to flirt with me,” the vampire said in a suspicious voice.
“Oh no, it’s all genuine fascination, sir. Look.” You pulled out a flashlight and your journal. Flicking the flashlight on, both you and the vampire winced in the light. You opened your journal, showing the vampire all of the notes and diagrams you made for vampire research.
“See?” You said, as you showed the vampire your research. “There’s so much information about you, yet there’s still so much to know.” You turned to meet the vampires eyes, that seemed to have softened after seeing the book. “I was hoping that I would find a vampire here, and that they’d be willing to teach me everything about vampires.”
“But why?” The vampire asked.
“Because I want to know what you guys are truly like.”
You both stood in silence, staring into each other’s eyes. The vampire took deep breaths, examining every inch of your face. He grabbed your shoulders for a split second, but you didn’t flinch.
“Strange...” the vampire said. “You’re very strange, you know that, right?”
“Very well,” you said.
“Well...” the vampire dragged. “I seem to be at a crossroads. You see, I need food, but you want to learn more about me. We don’t usually do well with, fanatics, darling.”
“Aren’t there animals in this forest?” You asked.
“Yes but...that’s not what I’m trying to say...” the vampire went silent, before saying, “Ah screw it. Listen, darling. If you truly want to learn more about me, leave. Meet me tomorrow night, here in this forest. I’ll find you, and then we’ll talk.”
“That’s it?” You said, surprised.
“Well, my guess is that you’ll think that this is all a dream.”
“That’s not enough to keep me away,” you said teasingly.
“Oh come on,” the vampire growled. “What’s it gonna take to get you off my back? You have two choices, darling: listen to me, or die.”
You smirked at the vampire. “Alright, I’ll listen to you. But may I ask for one tiny condition please?”
“Alright,” the vampire spat out. “What?”
“Your name.”
“My name?”
“Yes. So I have something to call you by. I’ll give you mine, it’s Y/N.”
The vampire frowned at you, taking in your calm face. Finally, he sighed. “It’s Dongmyeong,” he said.
“Dongmyeong,” you repeated. You loved the way his name rolled off your tongue. “Well then, Dongmyeong. I shall see you tomorrow. Goodbye.”
You turned around, walking into the thick black of the forest. Dongmyeong stood there, momentarily stunned by the interaction that he just had.
“Y/N,” he said to himself. “My leader will have fun learning about you, I’m sure.”
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katsuragi-yako · 6 years
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Rules: Answer the questions you’ve been given, then write your own and tag 11 people.
Tagged By: @deviliciious ( Thank you so much!! )
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#1 Whether you have other blogs, are a multi-muse or only have one muse, who has been or currently is your most favorite character to play? What is it that makes you enjoy that character so much?
Honestly, I love playing Yako. She is my number one favorite fictional character of all time, and I truly enjoy roleplaying her. However, so that I’m not being entirely predictable, I’ll give an honorary mention and shout out to Renet from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ( either the comic versions or the 2k3 series version ). I used to run an ask blog for her a while back and even a full rp blog for a little while before I got locked out of it. I love Renet to pieces and what made her so fun to play was that she can literally interact with anyone because of her powers and abilities. I could throw her pretty much anywhere and it works. Not to mention, she has such a fun personality to write for. I love my airhead, scatterbrained, time-traveling, dimension-hopping daughter. Maybe one day I’ll bring her back. I suck at juggling rp blogs but... idk maybe I’d give it another shot for her.
#2 What has been the most pleasant experience on this website? Related to writing or interactions with a person, whatever you can remember!
Tumblr specifically? Mmm... Weird as it might sound ( since drama in the rp community seems to happen constantly ), pretty much all of my rp experiences on here have been good. If I had to pick a favorite or “best” I’d say that my Ask Blog days as Renet and Usagi were very high up there. I made some great friends doing that, including someone who I talk to nearly everyday still and want to meet in person someday. Though, my experience with Yako has also been fantastic. If it’s not tied with the Ask Blog days, it’s damn near close.
#3 In your opinion, what is the hardest aspect when it comes to roleplaying? How about the easiest? What do you do to overcome any lack of muse, interactions, etc.?
This is going to sound like such a weird answer but, honestly, it’s the social aspect of roleplaying that is the toughest for me. I generally do not to have a huge OOC presence on my blogs and try to limit how many OOC posts I make ( because my first rp experience on tumblr was a group that had a limit to OOC posts, and that just sorta stuck with me ). Combine this with the fact that I’m usually quite reserved or quiet unless I get comfortable chatting with someone, and I think I end up lacking a lot of... mmm... personal presence? Reaching out to people to talk about roleplay related things is something I’ve grown used to, but I still have a lot of trouble sometimes talking to people about anything more, even if I want to. Believe me when I say I want to get to know the people I write with, but it’s a very tough thing for me to do because I constantly second guess if I’m talking too much or getting too personal. Plus, I am shit at keeping track of time so sometimes I drop off the face of the earth without meaning to and will realize too little too late that it’s been like a week or two since I’ve talked to someone rip.
#4 Favorite threads to have? Long or short, angst, fluff, etc.
Medium to longer length threads are generally my preference because even when I try to do short threads, my wordy ass always ends up lengthening it anyway. As for subject matter, I’m both a sucker for fluff and angst. Fluffy angst included. Give me all of it!
#5 Mention any positive influences you have! From other writers, book, shows, etc.
Haha, my Neuro ( itadxkimasu ) has honestly been a very positive influence on my writing. He’s a fantastic writer and I like to think I’ve grown a lot by roleplaying with him.
#6 Do you have a routine when it comes to writing? Write at a certain hour, do a certain number of replies, use the queue, format a certain way, etc.
Most of the time I write later in the day or in the evening since I’m more of a night owl. Sometimes when my sleep schedule is off from its norm and I’m up earlier I’ll write earlier as well, but that’s pretty rare. As for replies, since I usually don’t have that many threads at one time, I kinda stick to only doing one at a time. Like if I have two replies, I’ll do one reply and then either wait until the next day to do the other one, or at least take a break before doing it. There’s always exceptions, though. I rarely ever queue replies and I’ve been using the same simple format for my posts pretty much since I started this blog. Nothing too fancy there.
#7 How about sharing a few songs that inspire you? Whether they remind you of your muse or just put you in the mood to write, toss them here!
I’ve made both a Yako Playlist and a NeuYako Playlist in the past that includes a lot of music I use to make me think of Yako specifically. But I’ll sometimes listen to other music while writing. I love both SCANDAL and SID, The recent Kuroshitsuji Musicals, a lot of the recent Guild Wars 2 expansions soundtracks, and other stuff that kinda comes and goes depending on my moods haha.
#8 What has been the hardest character you have played? If you have played only one character then what has been the hardest part of portraying that character?
The hardest character I’ve played was one that I felt kinda forced into playing by a roleplay partner of mine a while back. They were absolutely desperate for someone to roleplay as MCU Thor and I felt somewhat obligated to do it since they had tried out a different character for me in the past. The character himself wasn’t the problem, though, it was more... that I lacked any sort of muse for him, and the subject matter of what they wanted me to roleplay with them made me very uncomfortable. Thankfully I didn’t have to do it for very long, as they eventually found someone else and kinda dropped me as a partner. But now I’m extremely wary about picking up a character for anything besides my own desire to play them.
#9 Any advice you would like to give to roleplayers? About the community, how to stay active, how to write, how to approach people, etc. Whatever crosses your mind.
For me, the hardest part is always the first step. If I can get myself to take the first step for anything--whether it be wiritng a reply I owe, reaching out to a person I want to interact with, making more icons or a new theme, etc--every thing after that goes easier than I always think it will. Hell, sometimes you almost have to force yourself to do it because if you’re like me, you tend to procrastinate even the things you enjoy sometimes because idk... reasons. But a lot of the time if I force myself to take the first step towards getting it done, I end up enjoying it. Or, at very least, realizing it wasn’t as hard as I thought it was going to be.
#10 If you could change one thing about your character, what would it be?
Hmmm... what I would change about Yako... I don’t know, I really like her the way she is, so there’s nothing I’d really change? If anything, I just want more MTNN so that we can learn even more about her LMAO. I guess if I had to choose one thing, it’d be to stop selling herself short so much. She largely underestimates her own abilities because I think, to her, they seem pretty lackluster next to a demon who could kill her in an instant if he so desired. But she really does accomplish some amazing things over the course of the series that likely none of the other human characters could have been capable of doing.
#11 What are a few things you would like to say to the people who write with you? Any advice about how to interact with your character? What you are looking for, wishlists, plot ideas, share some of your desires here so people can see!
Thank you so, so much for writing with me. I’ve really enjoyed most, if not all, of the interactions I’ve had on this blog and I look forward to more in the future! As for a wishlist of sorts... mmm... well, I still have plans to add more verses to broaden my options. So, whenever I get any of those finished, I’d love some threads for any of them. I’d also be down for a thread where Yako cooks with or for someone! I think that could be fun. Also, just more female characters in general! Yako interacts with mostly men for some reason ( not that that’s a bad thing, of course ), and I’d like her to meet some girls too!
My questions for those I’m tagging to answer are under the cut!
Tagging: @itadxkimasu, @bomba-tea, @gxxdgiirl, @timeovercome, @kcguya, and anyone else that would like to do it!
1. What was your first roleplay experience on tumblr? Do you consider it to be a good or bad one?
2. What are some of your favorite characters you’ve roleplayed in the past? If you haven’t roleplayed any other characters in the past, are there any that you wish you had?
3. Are there any characters that you have your eye on to possibly roleplay in the future at some point?
4. What is the hardest thing about roleplaying for you? Have you learned to overcome it? If so, how?
5. Are you happy with how you write or portray your character? Is there anything you want to improve upon?
6. Did you roleplay before doing so on tumblr? What were some platforms that you used in the past to do so?
7. Do you have a “type” when it comes to characters that you roleplay, or are you pretty varied? If you haven’t roleplayed more than one character, could you see yourself playing a similar character in the future, or would you try something different?
8. Does music help or hinder you while writing? If it helps, what do you usually listen to? If it doesn’t, do you stick with silence or do you listen to something else?
9. Is there a specific character that no one is roleplaying right now that you wish someone out there would pick up so that you could interact with them?
10. Is there anything about roleplaying on tumblr that annoys you? If so, what platform would you like to switch to? If not, what do you like most about roleplaying here?
11. How long do you think you’ll be roleplaying for? Any foreseeable end in sight, or will you be doing it for years to come? 
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