#and if not ayeeee shes a weirdo

[gabzsantosx]

WHERE:  BRINIE BAR

TIME: Later in the evening, any day of the week that works for your character.

gabz had spent the better half of an hour talking to an older man that gave her the absolute creeps. it seemed he was moving around the club quite a lot to be near her. eventually, after avoiding him for a bit, she decided she had to give him a reason to leave her alone. gabz slid into a seat at the bar beside someone and gave them a bright smile. “so, uh, hey. i’m avoiding that weirdo over there,” she said, nodding her head in the direction of the much older man without being too obvious. “i told him i was here with a good friend of mine, but i think he was catching on that i came here alone. do you mind hanging here with me a bit until he gets bored? i’ll buy you a drink,” she said, letting out a slight shaky breath between her cherry-painted lips.

[fameapa]

i want a love like yours and lili's.

first, you have to star on a CW show about sex, murder, and burgers from pop's chock'lit shoppe. once you got the contract, you'll start falling for your dorky dirty blonde friend, but there's a twist... she's fallen in love with your other friend, the mysterious but intelligent weirdo. who wouldn't fall in love with the guy that doesn't have to dye his hair red every two weeks? after two years of being friends, despite having a major crush on her, you still find it arduous to keep your true feelings in. it's even sadder when you won't get the chance to see her ever because the studio deliberately put your two friend's characters together for higher ratings. it's fan service, ayeeee. they break up after four years, though. you'll eventually get the chance to tell her about your feelings, but you'll first experience something with her that you never thought would happen... it'd be a beautiful encounter too. the rest is history after that --- just like every other relationship, there will be a collection of obstacles, but in the end, you should always express your feelings to the one that makes you smile.... the person that makes you happy, y'know? lili is that person for me. i love her with every fiber of my being. someday you'll feel this love in your life... everybody has a soulmate out there. @lilreinhvrt

[meganshinsou-tm]

Sugarcoated. (m)

↳ chapter seventeen: the void

❧ genre: pro-hero hitoshi, adoptive siblings, happy ending

❧ chapter warnings: mentions of suicide/self harm, depression, anxiety, comfort

[multi-chap masterlist] [previous chapter - next chapter]

The loud and obnoxious sound of the alarm on your phone woke you from a deep slumber. You groaned and reached behind your head to the arm of the couch and grabbed the device, picking it up and touching the 'off' button. Your fingers went to clutch the phone but it slipped from your hold and landed straight on your forehead.

"Oh for the love of fucking christ why!"

Groaning and moaning in pain, you rolled over and fell straight off of the couch with a yelp. 

"I'm just going to lay here and die," you thought to yourself as your face stayed buried into the rug. 

The phone started to ring only a few seconds later, startling you from the serene quietness of the house. With a sigh you sat up on your elbows and grabbed the phone, seeing that it was Hitoshi calling, more than likely to make sure you were awake from your nap.

"Ayeeee," you answered with a tired and un-enthused tone.

"I swear you're something else woman, are you awake? Like awake awake?"

"Yeah I'm awake, trust me," you replied rubbing your forehead.

"Okay, just making sure sweetness. The kid has dance this afternoon right?"

You confirmed Hitoshi's question as you rose from the floor with a groan. The two of you continued to converse as you put on your hoodie and coat, shoes and grabbed your car keys. It had been exactly three weeks since you moved in with your now boyfriend to help him with the care of Eri. It was an exhausting and busy three weeks but so wonderful at the same time. You liked the hustle and bustle of bringing Eri to and from school and her different lessons. More than anything you loved being part of Hitoshi and Eri's life, sharing a home with them both and having your own life full of love and happiness, all because of them.

"How about I meet you two after her lesson and we'll go out for dinner since it's Friday?"

You quirked a brow and counted back your days, realizing that Hitoshi was right but also causing another important detail to pop into your brain as you saw a sparkly pink duffel bag by the front door.

"Uh – I think it'll be just me and you actually. Eri is supposed to go to some little slumber party tonight after dance. I just remembered!"

"That's fine then, you know what, since you'll be back at home before me I'll just pick up some take-out on my way home and we'll have a night in together. It's been a while since we've had one of those, kid free. Maybe even have a copious amount of sex squeezed in between some movies and video games?"

You laughed as you were already out the door and getting into your vehicle, knowing good and well that your lover was at his work desk surrounded by his colleagues and not giving a single fuck about if they could overhear him or not.

"Mmm, food, movies, video games and sex. Should I wear my 'holey' pants, I just know how turned on you get when I strut around in them!"

A sharp inhale was heard on the other end of the call, making you laugh again from imagining Hitoshi grinning through his gritted teeth as he thought of your pair of pajama pants with pink pineapples all over them and a good number of frayed holes. You never cared to throw them away because they were the most comfortable pair of pj's you owned.

"Oh now you're talking, maybe even wear a matching trash bag top. Mmm, that'd be so fucking hot!"

More laughter erupted from your mouth, making Hitoshi laugh as well. You sank back into the seat of the vehicle after starting the engine and turning the heater on full blast. "I love you weirdo."

"I love you more sweetheart. Be careful on the road please, and text me when you get there."

"You got it captain!"

After picking up Eri from school, the two of you had a small amount of time to drive-thru and grab a quick snack. Eri sat in her booster seat, eating her fries and drinking her juice happily as you did the same. You turned down the music on the radio and glanced at the little girl in your rear-view mirror.

"So cutie, what do you want to be for Halloween? We're gonna have to start looking for a costume because you got that party coming up, plus we're all going to the festival at UA."

As Eri chewed on a mouthful of salty fries she thought with a finger to her cheek. After a few seconds, her ruby eyes lit up and she looked at you.

"I want to be Alice!"

"Ooh, that sounds easy enough! You'd make a very cute and fitting Alice! You know I think we should make Toshi be the Cheshire Cat!"

"Yeah! He's purple already!" Eri pointed out.

You laughed and agreed with her. You couldn't wait to tell Hitoshi the decision you and his sister made in regards to his Halloween outfit. Eri followed with asking what you would be, which actually stumped you. You weren't much of a fan of the classic tale but you had a general knowledge of it. The Mad Hater or Queen of Hearts just didn't really float your boat. 

"Hmm, who else is there?" 

A light flickered in your head as you thought about making you and Hitoshi match at least in the animal department.

"What about the White Rabbit?"

"Yeah! Then we would all match!"

The rest of the drive you and Eri planned out the pieces of your costumes. Once at dance you walked in with her, hand in hand and helped to get her dressed in her dance outfit and put her long silver locks up into a nice and neat bun. You stowed her stuff away and walked to the dance room, crouching to her level before she went inside.

"Alright, you're going home with Mai and her mommy today for her slumber party. All your things are in your bag, and if you need absolutely anything you let her mom know and she will call me or Toshi."

"Okay Unnie, you and Sou-Sou will come get me tomorrow?"

"Absolutely, whenever you're ready to come home, we'll be on our way!"

Eri smiled and nodded before hugging your neck tightly. You placed a kiss to her head before standing and coaxed her into the dance room. She smiled and waved goodbye to you and ran to join her little group of friends. You waved back and proceeded to give the other girls mother yours and Hitoshi's numbers and made your way back home, more than ready to have a lazy night with your equally exhausted boyfriend.

Hitoshi struggled to open the door of his home, after many failed attempts of calling your cell or kicking at the barrier since his hands were full, he had to manage by himself knowing that you wouldn't be coming to help him. Once inside he heard it was quiet for the most part, which had him worried until he walked more into the kitchen and could hear a vacuum cleaner running down the hall. His heart was put at ease, realizing that's why you didn't answer him.

The hero placed all the bags of food on the counter, he went all out and got everything the both of you enjoy from your favorite take-out place. You had been working so hard the past few weeks caring for Eri, cleaning the house and cooking in your free time, even if it was already spotless. 

Of course Hitoshi wasn't the type to just sit back and let you do these things, either you'd have them all done before he could get home or when he'd offer his help you'd decline it and suggest he spend time with Eri helping with her homework or just playing games with her. Tonight he wanted to make sure you were satisfied in more ways than one, a belly full of good food, a nice bath to relax your tired body, nice soft and comfy clothes and a whole bunch of doing nothing.

After Hitoshi's arms were empty he slid his shoes off and made his way towards the whirring sound of the cleaning appliance. It led him to Eri's bedroom and he poked his head around the corner of her door frame. The sight his eyes fell upon was very welcomed, making him chuckle and smile. 

Your ear buds were snug in your ears, your phone on the toddlers dresser. As you vacuumed you danced along with the music flowing into your canals, singing to it as well. Your hips swayed in a hypnotic way and you had great footwork as you stepped along with the beat. Your entire body was moving - shoulders, waist, head. (H/c) locks swayed along and your free hand was raised up dancing along too.

"Y se emociona, ya no razona. Y me empieza a cantar, me canta así, así. Bidi bidi bom bom. Bidi bidi bom bom."

Hitoshi's eyes lit up as he heard your voice speaking the Spanish language so flawlessly. He knew you liked many different types of music and knew countless songs word by word, the language barrier being no problem. 

This wasn't the first time the male had caught you like this either, there were multiple times he'd walk in on you dancing and singing in the shower, while baking or cleaning. Each time he'd scare the piss out of you by not making his presence known and you'd stop immediately. It wasn't like you couldn't dance or sing, because you could and so well. The sheer embarrassment of it all though is what would make you end the show. 

This time though, he didn't want that to happen. With the help of his own sounds being muted by your ear buds and vacuum, he was able to sneak inside the room and place himself a close distance behind you. His violet eyes watched your foot work and learned it quickly, they'd also gaze to your ass as you'd roll your hips and stick the plump flesh out.

He panted, seeing you in black leggings and a plain long-sleeve shirt. You didn't have to wear fancy or revealing getup's to get his blood pumping and his tongue hanging from his mouth. 

Hitoshi held his hands up and lined them with your hips as he got ready to step in with you. You sang the song so well and perfectly it's like he could hear the beat of it and easily became in-tune with your movements. Hitoshi took a deep breath and waited for just the right moment and took it. 

One arm wrapped around the front of your waist, pulling your gyrating hips into his, the other grabbed hold of your hand that swayed up in the air. Chuckling, his lips brushed against the skin of your neck, making a shocked gasp escape from your mouth. You hadn't fully registered what was happening as Hitoshi danced with you, moving his hips along with yours and pressing his hard chest to your back.

You stopped vacuuming, letting go of the machine and Hitoshi took the chance to twirl you around and face him. He took a bud from your ear and placed it in his so he could hear the music you listened to. It was lively and fun, his hands took hold of yours, fingers intertwining and holding them in the air as he danced along with you quite well.

"Toshi-ah! What the – you never told me you could even remotely dance!"

Hitoshi twirled you, making you giggle and tugged you towards him and kissed your cheek, "You never asked."

"That's my line you turd!"

Smiling, Hitoshi pulled you into his chest and dipped you, timing it perfectly with the end of the song. He was so pleased with himself and placed sweet kisses up your neck to your cheek before standing you straight up again. His arms wrapped around you and hugged you close, you hummed and hugged back burying your face into him. Hitoshi pulled away and removed the bud from yours and his ear, grabbed your phone and shut off your music.

"Come on sweetness, let's get that thing put back up and get our night started!"

After eating all the food you could until you were miserable, Hitoshi ran a bath and you both bathed and relaxed until you were prunes. Now you laid on the couch together watching a movie. Hitoshi played with your (h/c) hair as you laid on his chest until you lost interest in the film and moved to sit up and straddle his lap. He smiled and touched your warm cheek, drinking in the site of you wearing one of his shirts and looking adorable.

"I didn't ask yet, but how was your last full week at the agency?"

Hitoshi explained his week and you listened closely, your hands playing with his.

The time had come finally for him to start his teaching job at UA that following Monday, you were excited and nervous for him, he was more excited than anything. All week after he'd get off work, he'd stop by the school to set up his classroom and get everything in place and ready. 

You and Eri stopped by one day to bring him dinner and you weren't exactly surprised to see just how much he put into the room. It looked chaotic with all the sketches, posters and prints that hung from the walls but it was somehow like an organized chaotic. Everything flowed together well, it was cozy and very inviting. As he stated before, there was a big print of your picture from Disneyland on one of the walls, along with an equally sized picture of Eri. Hitoshi said he was going to make the classroom his own and make it his own he did.

"You excited for your first day of teaching?" You asked, moving your hands up Hitoshi's chest to wrap around his neck and play with his hair.

"Definitely, it'll be a nice change and new journey. I can't wait to meet my students and see how creative they are."

You smiled at your lover's excitement and leaned forward to kiss his lips softly. Hitoshi hummed as his hands rested on and squeezed your hips. He grinned after you broke away, asking what the kiss was for.

"Just because. I'm really proud of you Hitoshi, you set your sights on something and you go after it."

"Well thank you sweetheart. I'm so lucky to have you," he replied and pulled your lips to his again, giving you a kiss to express his gratitude.

You smiled and leaned down, hugging his chest and pressing your cheek to it. Hitoshi wrapped his own arms around you and kissed the top of your head.

"It's definitely the other way around Toshi."

Shinsou smirked as he rubbed your back and you went back to watching the movie on the tv but suddenly it's like your words brought a past memory up, from that night in the bathtub a few weeks ago. 

"I don't know how much longer I would've lasted in this world." 

Somehow he had forgotten to ask you about that night, about your life and emotional health before moving in with him. Looking down at you, Hitoshi figured now was a good enough time to ask you, you were awake and aware and already in a somewhat mushy and open mood. You never had been the type to really hide anything from him, even before your relationship became official. Hitoshi picked up on clues to your moods and he'd ask you about them, sometimes you'd be hesitant or annoyed with his line of questioning but you always answered him. In the end you'd feel better having him to vent to.

"Hey baby," Hitoshi started off as his hand on your back squeezed, "I've been wanting to talk to you about something."

You remained in your place, your hand holding onto Hitoshi's bicep and your thumb brushing his skin under the sleeve of his shirt. "What is it Toshi?"

"Do you remember a few weeks ago, when you and Eri made that cake, me and you took a bath that night and you were dozing off? You said something to me, something about how if I hadn't come along with my job offer then you didn't know 'how much longer you would've lasted in this world'. Does any of that ring a bell?"

Your brows knitted, trying to recall that nights events. The memories were blurry, you were in a dazed state after all. You remembered Hitoshi bathing you, holding you close and letting you melt into him. When you're extremely tired and trying to fight it off, you tend to blabber a lot about your hearts innermost feelings. More than likely that was the case that night, no denying it.

"I don't remember it exactly, but it sounds like something I would've said."

"What exactly did you mean by that? You weren't planning on hurting yourself ... were you?"

There was a pause before you replied, letting out a long and ragged breath as you thought how to form the words that wanted to fall from your lips. 

You had thoughts before, of how much easier life would be if you didn't have a life at all. You wouldn't have to worry about meeting due dates for bills, wouldn't have to be bothered with your families problems and above all, wouldn't have to see that monster you worked for ever again. Each day going back and forth to that café seemed to just break a piece of your soul off more and more. The looks, whistles and words that you'd hear. 

Your only saving grace being Hitoshi when he'd stop by and grace you with his company. For those few moments or hours, you'd feel that everything was good in the world, that maybe you could make it one more day if it meant seeing that tuft of purple hair and those glistening amethyst eyes one more time.

"Uh – not exactly, I guess? I don't know. I think back then I honestly had just given up on caring about my life Hitoshi. I was in the mindset that if something 'bad' did happen to me then I'd be okay with it. Truthfully, I'm too much of a little bitch to ever off myself, I wanted it to be done for me. I'd go as far as seeking out dangerous situations sometimes."

Hitoshi clenched his jaw, letting your words hit him hard, his hold on you grew tighter. You kissed the inside of his elbow that your face rested in and continued.

"I – I'd purposefully walk through the rough and bad areas of the city on my way home some nights. Hoping someone would think I was good enough to mess with and even hurt. Other times I wouldn't pay attention to my surroundings as I walked crosswalks during heavy traffic. I feel disgusted with myself that I even thought of giving into that man I worked for, then trying to back out of it, hoping he'd get mad enough to lose his control and just ... end me. I almost got what I wished for huh? Except that night, my entire view had changed, I didn't want that situation anymore but still it ended up happening, like some sick joke."

Hitoshi could feel his chest tightening, his heart aching and squeezing. The thought of seeing a story on the news about a girl with your description found behind a dumpster in the slums of Japan had his stomach in knots and made him nauseous. The fact that you sought that out, made it even worse. 

If you truly had gotten everything you wished for back then, Hitoshi would've been guilt ridden for sure. It was his fucking job to read people, how did he not see that dead and hopeless look in your eyes? 

Was it because when he was around, even if you acted annoyed, that you were at your happiest? Just the act of him stopping by and requesting you, was that what kept you going? What about your own family, there's no way they didn't play a part in your life and no way they wouldn't have helped you, had you asked for it.

"(Y/N), what about your family?"

Your shoulders shrugged and you hummed. 

"Well, I distanced myself from them. My parents especially, I just wanted to escape all the – the idiocy. My brother and his wife, their kids, they were another reason I kept going. My mother and father though, nothing happy every comes out of those relationships. Just being let down time and time again, picked over for something better."

You had no family really, except for your sibling and his small family. Those two kids of theirs were your entire world. Then Hitoshi and Eri came along and your world grew. You and brother would go a few weeks without talking to each other, it was normal. They would get busy with the kids and work, and you would be busy with whatever was going on in your life. Always though, you'd check up on each other after too long and pick up from where you left off.

Hitoshi was silent as you explained your sad and chaotic life to him, taking it all in. He never knew any of this went on, had he known, he would've done more, made his move earlier! You finally pulled yourself from his chest, going back to straddling his hips and looking at him. The man looked to be on the verge of tears. 

You pouted and cupped Hitoshi's face, leaning forward and resting your forehead to his.

"I'm sorry Hitoshi. I'm sorry I didn't value you my life like I should've. Sorry for not being strong enough and being a coward, for being stupid and endangering myself. I just, I had enough of it all, I was tired," a shaky breath left your lips, " - so tired. I wasn't going anywhere fast enough for my liking, I had these dreams that seemed so unrealistic and I got discouraged. You saved me though and each day I'm so thankful you walked into that café almost every goddamn day and showed me that smile and kindness. It got to where I lived for it, now wholeheartedly I live all because of you."

Tears flowed from your eyes and from Hitoshi's as well. When he felt a tear drop onto his shirt the hero captured you in his arms holding you as close as humanly possible. Your cries rippled through him as he held your head to him and pet your hair. You apologized over and over, for the smallest and most unnecessary reasons. Hitoshi quietly cried with you, comforting and shushing your un-needed words.

"You have nothing to be sorry for towards me (Y/N). I'm sorry I didn't notice sooner or did something about it. The thought of you suffering alone, not being this person I've been so blessed to see these past few weeks, it fucking kills me. As long as there's a breath in me, I promise to do everything in my power to make sure you're happy. I'll support and back all your dreams like you do for me, I'll always be here for you to vent to and let your frustrations out on, I'll be absolutely any and everything you could ever need. You have to promise me though that if you ever feel yourself slipping, even just the smallest bit, back into that void, you'll let me know."

You nodded, sniffling and wiping your nose and eyes with the backs of your hands and arms. "I promise Hitoshi. Thank you so much, for everything. I love you so much."

Hitoshi closed his eyes and squeezed you tight, placing a kiss to your temple and wiped your eyes. "I love you so much more."

The next few minutes were spent with Hitoshi holding you close, both of you calming down and getting back to normal. Your boyfriend instructed you wrapped around and hold him tight as he got up from the couch, carrying you to the kitchen and sitting you on the counter. He grabbed a clean rag and wet it with warm water, wrung it out then placed himself between your knees. As you sniffled, Hitoshi used the rag to wipe and clean your eyes and face. The warmth of the cloth made you relax and you gave the man an appreciative smile.

"Sorry I kind of ruined the whole vibe tonight Toshi."

"Baby, you didn't ruin anything. As painful as it was, I'm glad we had this talk. How about we play a friendly game of Mario Kart to get the mood back up?"

You chuckled as Hitoshi took your face in his hands, pulling you to look up at him towering over you and placing a kiss to your lips. Your hands hung from his as you kissed back eagerly. His warm and soft lips were helping to bring the warmth back to yours. The taste of spicy curry was still on his tongue that was welcomed into your mouth and lapped at your own muscle, you enjoyed it honestly. Tongues retreated back to their own caves and your lips enveloped each other one last and long time before breaking away.

"You're on Hitoshi, get ready to get your ass kicked!"

A cocky grinned grew on Hitoshi's face and he quickly tossed you over his shoulder, placing a firm smack to your ass as he carried you back into the living room. It stung more than usual being you weren't wearing pants to protect your skin. You playfully bit at the back of his shoulder, making him only bite your thigh in retaliation.

"Ow you fucker! I'd be nice if I were you, I do get to put together your Halloween costume in fact, and I could be evil about it!"

"What costume? I haven't told you what I wanted to be yet."

You smiled as Hitoshi flung you onto the massive couch from over his shoulder. His arms trapped your head and he looked down on you and leaned on the couch.

"You don't get a say in the matter, Eri chose for you and it's great! You see, you'll be going as the Cheshire Cat, ears and all! For once I'll be the one drooling over you in a kitty cat getup!"

Hitoshi narrowed his eyes at you and grit his teeth. Your finger reached up and glided under his chin then to bop the tip of his nose as you giggled.

"Cat got your tongue Toshi?"

"Bite me," he snapped back.

Propping up on your elbow, your hand cupped his neck and tugged him down roughly and closer to you, the tip of your tongue licked up the side of his throat and stopped at his jaw where you nipped lightly. "Don't mind if I do!"