#and it makes me hungry for finger lickin' goodness... ;)

[britishchick09]

the best thing about writing a modern sherlock holmes adaptation? having him and watson go to kfc! ;D

[delopsia]

🍗 i haven’t written anything in like a thousand years but i really hope these are the type of abnormal headcanons you were looking for!

rhett is “whatever they had at the gas station” but make it crunchy. cowboy seems like a snacker to the max, like, the only meal this man ever really wants to eat or cares about eating is whatever cecilia makes for dinner. this is a man who gets up before dawn and can’t even think about food before eleven (never mind actually having any time to sit and eat a real breakfast most days) and when he does it’s never from a plate; grazing like a gazelle type eats. maybe around eleven-thirty he’ll hit up a pouch of trail mix or something. he actually likes raisins thank you very much and definitely prefers honey nut sweet n’ salty chex mix to any of that fake m&m or chocolate chip addition weirdness. when he’s not absentmindedly crushing a family sized bag of jalapeño cheetos, spicy honey mustard combos, or old faithful (pork rinds), he can be found stealing bites from whatever you’re eating whether you’re into it in the beginning or not. the first time it happened a few months into your relationship you almost caught his wrist with your fork and looked at him like he was out of his goddamn mind. “i asked you if you were hungry...” you explain when his brows furrow into that cute ass grumpy puppy emoji face he swears he doesn’t do. he just sighs and tucks back into the booth seat across from you on his phone and lets you eat it in peace... but you can’t stop thinking about it and this and him and before you know it you’re cutting a good bite of pancakes off the stack and holding it up to him. those big blue irises flick up, a little smile tugs at his lips before he opens wide and hums in delight at the soft buttery syrupy diner brunch. rhett tries not to look like the cowboy who caught the flapjack when you ask for another set of cutlery.

okay... i’d say my beloved bobby is the complete opposite: a real meal kinda guy. he’s southern and eats like it (affectionate). he likes it all: spicy, sweet, finger-lickin’, hearty, comfortably full-bellied, might think about taking a nap afterwards type eats. barbecues, (i don’t headcanon bob as being religious so maybe post mission dagger squad potlucks with his mama and sister recipes that he he picked up over the years), holidays, etc. but back to the matter at hand, i can totally see him being fast food chicken sandwich fiend. if the place he finds himself in has one he’ll try it. he doesn’t believe any place has The Best chicken sandwich because that’s his mama's all day everyday and there’s absolutely no competition. but they’re all pretty good in their own way regardless. when he’s home on leave and gets the inevitable craving for a mcdonald’s chicken sandwich specifically, it’s a bit of a production. you were with him one of these times and off you went to find the ol’ golden arches. he was polite as pie in the drive thru because of course and when he asks for extra napkins at the end you suspect they actually gave them because of it. he parks in the back corner of the lot like teenagers and you feel a little giddy. he kisses you and starts unloading the bag; his two crispy chicken sandwiches and a quarter pounder with mac sauce and cheese. they actually put extra mayo and pickles on both of his sandwiches which surprised you and you’re about to say as much when he opens them up to stack them together arranging the pickles and all between the sturdier looking of the two buns. you try not to get distracted when he licks the mayo from his fingertips and asks of you could uncap the bottle of hot sauce right there “please, darlin’” and when you look down as if it magically appeared there sat a small half-finished bottle of frank’s red hot xtra. you jokingly call him crazy as he heavy-hands the liquid cayenne onto the sandwich and just about unhinges his jaw to take a bite. he nods, chews and says “but that’s why ya love me...” like he wants you to mean it but also like he could let it roll off like a joke. you stare at his side profile as starts going as red as his hot sauce. “yeah,” you whisper, an thread of finality weaving through your words, “that’s why i love ya.”

!! oh this was so cute to read; I literally had walk out the room and get my head on straight because I started melting midway through. I love every word you've said😭

Rhett, the food thief! I never even thought about it until you mentioned it; there's no way he isn't one. The first time we even see him in the show, we literally watch him walk in and steal a piece of Amy's bacon. What's to stop him from reaching over and stealing a piece of your food? I rest my case, your honor 💃

I love love the headcanon of him being a snacker that just grazes all day. Eats one meal a day but has countless snacks before and after. Probably keeps them hidden, too, because there's nothing more annoying than looking for a snack that someone's already eaten. The pork rinds are in the glove box; the trail mix is hidden in the tack room. You're only aware of this because you walked into the shed and found him pulling that bag of jalapeño Cheetos out of what's supposed to be a toolbox. As soon as he sees you, he just...quietly looks at the bag, then back to you, holds it out, and goes, "do you want one?"

So that's how you wind up as a member of the Hidden-Snack Alliance™

Now that you've said it, I can't unsee it. Bob. Sweet, sweet bob who could eat an entire horse and still be hungry. The type of guy that finishes your food for you when you're full and don't want to take the leftovers home. He doesn't even have to ask after a while; all you have to do is give him a short nod. Leftovers? Not on Robert's watch.

Do you think he has a list? Because I feel like he's got a whole list on his phone, ranked from best to worst, with detailed reasons why, and it's always changing, but it always says "Moms :)" in the #1 slot. "Bob, is the chicken sandwich from here any good?" "Only if you like getting food poisoning, sweetheart."

Kisses!! before he ever touches his food! I have left the building, never to be seen again. He straight-up has his own "secret menu" item AND has the Frank's Red Hot Xtra on standby. If you look hard enough, there's probably a gallon container of it in the back of the cabinet, and he just refills the same bottle over and over.

He's crazy, but most importantly, he's crazy for you.

[alwaysthesitter]

TAG DROP

Robin/Steve: [platonic with a capitol p*/dyn robin buckley] Dustin/Steve: [he can bend like gumbo*/dyn dustin henderson] Max/Steve: [how come the only one helping me is this random girl*/dyn max mayfield] Nancy/Steve: [you're beautiful nancy wheeler*/dyn nancy wheeler] Eddie/Steve:  [don't try to be cute or be a hero*/dyn eddie munson] Billy/Steve: [something hungry for blood*/dyn billy hargrove]   Fruity Four: [that is actually...this is CRAZY!*/dyn fruity four] OOC: [pretty good babysitter*/ooc] Wishlist: [it's finger lickin' good*/wishlists & desires] NSFW:[dont cream your pants*/nsfw] Aesthetic/Pictures/Other: [a true himbo*/visage & aesthetics] Answered: [screw company policy*/answered] Memes: [stealthy like a ninja*/memes] HeadCanons: [the hell am i sorry for*/head canons] Ships: [you're gonna slay 'em dead*/ships] Threads: [four puffs of farrah fawcett spray*/threads] Promos: [ahoy ladies*/promos] Ebbie Munson: [it's totally blowing my best feature*/ship ebbiemunson] Kegkinghargrove: [tell anyone and your ass is grass*/ship kegkinghargrove] Kinghaargrove: [were you dropped too much as a child*/ship kinghaargrove] Surfkng: [i just want to make things right*/ship surfkng] Runningupthathill: [you're way too young for that*/dyn zoomingupthathill] Wild-flcwer: [don't forget about this pretty face*/ship wild-flcwer] blueminke: [now i'm crawling forward slowly*/ship blueminke] Rebelliousfamily: [you're there, you've always been there*/ship rebelliousfamily] FabFive Group Chat: [how many children are you friends with*/dyn fab five group]

[eyearebee]

Surfing through Pinterest at midnight is probably one of the worst things.

Sometimes you're just minding your own work peacefully and suddenly Pinterest decides to mess with you and pops a video or an amazing delirious photo of SOME random food, and you just feel hungry and start craving for it even though you don't like half the things that go into it...

People are like I want all the dresses and wedding destinations that I see in that app, but no one, NO ONE ACKNOWLEDGES ABOUT THE GODDAMN B-E-A-UTIFUL TASTY LOOKINGFOOD

Like, no mom! I don't know what that is but I AM CRAVING FOR THAT.

Look, just look at these pictures and tell me that you're not hungry and that you don't want to eat them... (You're lying if you say that)

[rphelperblog]

Steve Harrington Rp Meme

inspired by @recoveringjock​ feel free to edit or change pronouns-

"I love KFC... It’s finger-lickin' good."

“She threw it with her mind. She has superpowers, keep up.”

“i’m not saying that you have no game, I’m just saying you can’t beat me in the girl department.”

“Oh, screw him. [muses’s name] is her daddy now.”

If it makes you feel any better, having those things isn’t all that great.”

Would you guys like to set sail on this ocean of flavor with me?”

 “I love you, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry? The hell am I sorry for?” 

“Ahoy Ladies! Didn’t see you there ”

“Well... you know... I could take him out.”

”I like boobies. You like boobies.”

“you think that I am a spy in a sailors costume?”

“Wait a second, are we even allowed to be here?”

“She sounds like a muppet giving birth.”

"How many children are you friends with?"

“if you die, I die.”

“How many times- I don’t do drugs, dad. It’s only marijuana.”

“You are not falling in love with this girl? Are you?”

”Know who pauses Fast Times at 53 minutes, 5 seconds? People who like boobies.”

"I just... I wanna help."

Your new best friend who you think is cooler than me because he plays your nerdy game?"

Then why is it called 'Back to the Future'?!”

“That kids gotta get his ego in check.”

“Always the babysitter. Always the goddamn babysitter.”

“How come this random girl is the only one helping me?”

“I’m stealthy, like a ninja.” 

“Yeah it’s me Don’t cream your pants”

“I may be a pretty shitty boyfriend, but turns out I’m actually a pretty damn good babysitter.” 

”The obvious things are not what people observe.’ Or…’ do…don’t observe.’ Or…Sherlock Holmes.”

Huh that's weird I don't know her."

He’s missing bones and stuff. He can bend like Gumbo.”

“How do you know it’s not just a lizard?”

“Yeah, that’s a no.”

“Is this really necessary?”

As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything. I feel confident in my ability to continue not to know what is going on.”

You're beautiful.”

"Thank you. For giving my head the biggest thump of Its life two years ago. I needed It. It's changed my life. And now I'm crawling forward. slowly."

“hello ladies...”

“Screw Company Policy. You Know That”

"Man, kids are the worst! Who needs 'em, anyway?"

"She’s only gonna break your heart, and you’re way too young for that."

"Yeah, Farrah Fawcett. you tell anyone I just told you that and your ass is grass."

“Something’s coming. Something hungry for blood. A shadow grows on the wall behind you, swallowing you in darkness. It is almost here”

"I said does everyone understand that?!"

“Hey. Hey. Hey! This is not happening.” 

“This is crazy, That is actually… This is crazy. THIS IS CRAZY ”

” It’s Fabergé Organics. Use the shampoo and the conditioner, and when your hair’s damp—it’s not wet, okay? When it’s damp, do four puffs of the Farrah Fawcett spray.”

"You look great, and you’re gonna slay 'em dead."

With their quickness, our game plan to start was to slow them down a little bit, play some zone. They hit some threes and at that point we just felt we had to change it up. We went man-to-man, we went with a different lineup tonight. We just went with all quick ball-handling type players.”

We’re out there where we hope to be pristine into eternity.”

[the-soliloquies-of-sadists]

#194

“You fucking whore, you can come out out of the bushes now! I watched you from the cab. I saw you naked at that picnic table down below taking what? eight? nine? drivers, one right after the next over the period of one hour. You fucking whore....

“Where the fuck are your clothes? You are not getting back into our cab until you tell me what the fuck were you doing? I know we are paired up for a few months and this is barely day one, but we need to establish some rules. I don’t care if you suck dick or take it up the ass, but it doesn’t interfere with our driving.

“You don’t have to worry about me. I use queers all the time on the road. Hell after my rest, I was going to play down below myself. Yeah, I know the spots across the country to have fun. This isn’t the easiest vista view to maneuver, so all the drivers up here are most likely here to play, especially at night. This place can get wild. But now I have a cunt at my disposal, which should make the drive a lot easier. Yes, I said disposal. Fuck up and you’ll be kicked to the curb naked as you are now. One call to the company and you will be gone in no time.

“Now where are your clothes? Don’t bother to come up with an excuse. One of the drivers took your shit and tried to rob our cab. The fucker woke me up. He bolted before I could beat the shit it out of him. You are lucky. He left your shit right there. Don’t worry I locked up your clothes. Listen here fucker this is my home. You cannot ever lose your keys. Fuck! That was a major fuck up. That cannot be swept under the rug.

“Get over here and put your hands on the bumper. Make sure your ass is up high. Don’t worry about the other drivers. They pretty much saw my reaction to being broken in. They know you fucked up. They know why you will be getting a good ass lickin’. And that’s not the fun kind of ass lickin’ either. You need to know that you follow my rules at all times. Ten licks should do. Those drivers are all watching.

“Damn your scream echoed all over. Let’s do that again. Fuck, the sounds of the belt landing on those well used cheeks and your yelps are turning me on. Wait, what the fuck? You got cum all over my belt. Jesus! Your cunt is leaking spooge. Pull apart your ass cheeks let me see your pussy. Fuck! That is one well used hole. Those lips are so puffy. You can’t even keep those drivers’ loads in you. Back in it goes. Damn, my two fingers just slipped in without any resistance. Three fingers. Damn, you are four finger tight.

“You need to work on this muscle. But you know what? All this driver dick drool filling up your puss is making is all slippery. I’m going in. Hold the fuck still. I said hold still. You only have a half an inch on my thumb knuckle. It’s ok to scream; I mean fuck! I’m shoving my fist into you. Those other drivers would love to hear what a cunt you are. Almost there.

“There’s so much cum in here. How many men dumped in you?… I bet this isn’t the first time you have had a man shove his fist in you. Fucking whore. There! I’m in. Goddamnit this feels good.

“One of the drivers that fucked you earlier is walking over here. Looks like you are going to be spit roasted again. You fucking fucking fucking whore. I don’t know if it’s wrong to keep doing this, but I will tell you that it feels all right….

“Hey, whip it out. He’ll suck you off like a good whore…. No, I just found out here that my co-driver is a cock hungry, fist eating, cum whore. Fuck, I have to stop. I’m ready to burst now. I need to save myself for when the sun starts to set, and the fun begins. You wanna take over here?… He’s got like a gallon of cum up in there….

“Hey whore, I do need to get some rest. I’ll be back out later. Don’t worry, I got your clothes and shit in the cab. Have fun. That’s an order. I want you cunt filled with cum. Don’t bother knocking on the door to get in. Not unless you want more welts. Get used to being treated like this. This is your life for the next few months. Fucking whore. See you in a few hours.”

[wonderwomanfantasy]

five senses

listen you’re going to read this fic and you’re going to go “wow maddie has an oral fixation that's good to know I guess,” and you know what? mind you’re business. 

Sero x Fem!Reader

warnings: smut, for play, bondage, sensory deprivation, temperature play, licking? i’m going to warn for it, swearing

word count: 1,500 (about) 

Summary: Sero accidently discovers a new kink of his. 

Sero never had a problem sharing food. it just wasn't a big deal for his friends to pick off his plate, provided he got to pick off of theirs of course. But of course you just had to be a little tease about it. 

“Wow sero that curry looks good,” you cooed from across the lunch table. you pressed your chest up against the tabletop drawing his attention to your boobs. Sero had to force himself too look at your face as he responded

“it is good, you should have some,” he even pushed his tray closer to you so you could pick what you wanted easily, a curtesy he granted few others. 

“feed me,”  you challenged. Sero didn’t think much of it, he scooped up some meat and rice with his spoon and guided it to your lips and you ate from him giving a small noise of delight at the taste.  And his heart stopped in his chest. 

his chest felt warm and light, he wanted to make that noise again. make it for him. maybe with something else in your mouth. maybe alone. you pulled back from the spoon and Sero snapped back to the real world. 

“you want another bite?” he asked clearing his throat. 

“I have my own food Hanta,” you teased. Sero had already scooped another bite for you, almost reluctantly he put the spoon in his own mouth, he could almost taste you. 

From then on you weren’t aloud to feed yourself while Sero was around. at least once a meal Hanta insisted on being the one to put the food in your mouth. didn’t even matter if it was with his own fingers or chopsticks. He just lived to see you look up at him while that soft noise of appriation left your throat. it made him all tingly. 

Things only got worse when you started dating. suckers and lollipops went directly from his mouth to yours back to his. He’d brake off bits of cookies and hold one end in his mouth and let you eat off the other end. you went through a lot of boxes of pocky that way. 

Then sometimes you’d feed him and sero felt his soul ascend. Your hands were so soft as you brushed his face, you’d almost always kiss him after you fed him as well usually making him hungry for something entirely different. 

It didn’t help that you liked cooking with him. he couldn’t help but ask you to taste test a sause he was making every five or so minutes just to hold you close and put the wooden spoon to your lips. 

You had your fair bit of fun with Sero’s oral fixation too. He nearly lost his mind whenever you changed your chapstick. kissing you over and over again bruising your lips until he committed the new taste to memory. not to mention how wild you could drive him with a banana. 

It really was only a mater of time before he brought his oral fixation into the bedroom. 

You were cuffed to the bed, your hair brushed back from your face and blindfolded. you were also naked but that almost didn’t matter. Not to Hanta at least. 

he picked up a ripe and red strawberry he took a  moment to trace the outline of your lips with the fruit before letting you take a bite of it. 

“strawberry, too easy,” you guessed, humming as you chewed. the berry had burst when you’d bitten in and a trail of juice dripped down your chin. Sero licked his lips. fuck it. he thought leaning in and licked your jaw. tasting you. 

“that one seemed like a tongue,” you teased. 

“it’s not supposed to be hard,” he said picking up a piece of chocolate and feeding it to you. He couldn’t stop himself from kissing you this time, he went in open-mouthed letting his tongue explore and taste. He was moaning into your mouth and he felt creepy obsessing over you like this but it felt to good for him to even consider stoping. you were so delicious. 

“Sero?” you asked thoughtfully once he had pulled back. 

“what princess?” 

“If more stuff dribbles down my chin will you lick me again?” you asked  as he kissed you again. 

“I brought chocolate sauce for licking, you want it now baby or-”

“yes I want it now,” 

“let me finish you brat, do you want it now baby because I’m not going to be nice about it,” he huffed. you bit your lip, your teeth dimpling the soft skin of your lower lip. He wanted badly to bite your lip too. 

“yes,” you decided. He smiled to himself popping off the cap of the fudge. he tilted the jar letting the warm chocolate spread over your naked chest and stomach making you hiss. it was almost like hot wax. sero licked his lips watching the choclate dripp down your sides. He leaned over you  letting his tongue drag across your warm skin lickin as much fudge up as he could. 

Sero loved the taste of you, He ended up sucking on your stermun and the soft skin on your tummy even after the choclate was gone he was just addicted to your taste. He pushed himself down your body kissing down your thighs. or maybe biting down them would be more apt. 

Sero pushed your legs open and staired at your pretty wet cunt, the place he knew you would taste best. He held himself back. If he started eating you out now there would be no stopping himself and he wasn’t done teasing you yet.  

“What do I want next,” he hummed thoughtfully his fingers skimming over the assortment of fruits and sweat that he had selected for tonight. Before deciding on a tub of vanilla icecream. 

He used a spoon to spread the desert on the inside of your thighs making you jump. 

“that’s cold Sero,” you whined trying to close your legs. Sero caught you by the ankle and forced you to stay spread. 

“Sorry Baby I told you I wasn’t going to be nice,” he said leaning down to lick your legs, by the time he was done with you, your thighs looked a lot like your chest, flushed and bitten raw. you were whimpering, your chest to hot and your legs too cold and overall badly needing Sero to just get on with it and make love to you already, you were getting desperate enough to beg. 

“H-Hanta I-”

“I know you need me to fuck you already I can see how needy your puffy little pussy is getting,” he teased pressing down hard on your clit. you felt your cheeks heat with embarrassment. but the shame didn’t last long as Sero kept twisting your clit the pleasure came naturally. 

“Hanta,” you moaned lightly gyrating your hips against his hand to get as much friction as you could. It was exhilarating not knowing where the next touch would come from. You felt his hot breath on your neck as he hesitated. your body tensed and Sero kissed you. his tongue darting out of his mouth to lick up the side of your throat. 

His tongue was so warm and sweet against your skin you found yourself addicted to the feeling. The combination of his mouth on your neck and his fingers working your clit had you moaning. 

Then two of his fingers dipped inside of you swirling your insides before quickly pulling them back out again. 

“Open your mouth baby,” he prompted and pushed his fingers in your mouth the moment you parted your lips for him. you wrapped your tongue around his fingers tasting the wetness that clung to them and feeling the rough calluses on the pads of his digits. 

“do you like the taste of yourself baby? aren’t you the most delicious thing in the world?” he asked slowly pumping his fingers in and out of your mouth letting you get them nice and wet with your saliva. 

you could only moan around his hand to agree. Suddenly you felt something else proud your entrance, and the sound you ler out was more of a gasp than a moan. 

“come on baby I know you can take something bigger than my fingers without choking,” he teased. “Be a good girl and suck on my fingers while I fuck you okay?” he breathed his cock sliding inside of you in one smooth stroke. you sucked on his fingers silently agreeing to do what he asked. 

Sero kept moving his fingers in and out of your mouth feeling your tongue wrap around his didgits. slowly his hips matched the pace so he was fucking your cunt and mouth at the same time. 

You felt so good wrapped around his cock, you looked so good drooling on his fingers, there was no way Sero was going to last long. 

“I’m going to cum,” he warned “I’m going to fill your pussy up with so much cum you won’t know what to do with yourself princess,” he sighed snapping his hips down even harder before stopping entirely as he came, his seed filling you up, he watched the cum drip ouf of you once he pulled out. he pulled his drool coated fingers and moved it to your clit. 

You hadn’t cum yet, but that was alright, after all he still had a lot of food to get through still. 

[darthwheezely]

Okay so BY NO MEANS DO YOU HAVE TO WRITE THIS IF YOU AREN'T UP FOR IT!!! BUT- can you write something where Jimmy holds the reader down and just overstimulates them with his fingers and whenever it gets too much he kind of teases them about it (in like a sweet way but still not stopping). IDK- it's a hot thought if you're up for it!!! AGAIN YOU DON'T HAVE TO IF YOU DON'T WANT TO! Thank you and I hope you have a wonderful night/day💗💗

Finger Lickin’ Good - Jimmy Darling x Reader

Jimmy’s way too pent up to let those beautiful hands of his go to waste...

Warnings: NSFW/18+, if you’re a minor plEASE do not interact w this I know you wanna be spicy but sis please do not, okay? cussing probably, soft dom!Jimmy, possibly awful writing, my kink for Jimmy’s hands and heart and body and mind and-

a/n: lindsey, miss ma’am, you literally know i’m a whore for this man and besides, you could request the most whack shit and i would still prolly write it if only to see your reaction ajsjsjs

To say that Jimmy’s balls were blue was an absolute understatement. The man was honestly lucky enough to have balls at the rate (or rather, lack of) things were going. You and Jimmy’s sex life was always - well something neither of you ever needed to worry about, but lately with Elsa running around covering all her legal bases, she had sent everyone in a frenzy.

Unfortunately for you two this meant less than satisfactory time together. It was always something. And to be quite honest, Jimmy didn’t know if he could go another two weeks without touching you. And to make matters worse he knew you weren’t making it any easier.

It started with little things, light touches on his shoulders, something usual in your relationship. Then jaw kisses before going onstage. Then wearing The Dress.

Yes. That dress. The a-line that managed to not only show off a small but still good amount of cleavage, the waistline elastic bow on the back sinking into where your elevated waist hit naturally, and the worst? It was white. Jimmy had a thing for you in white.

That morning he couldn’t take it anymore. I mean, clearly, you wanted to act that dirty with him knowing he couldn’t touch you, right? So what was he gonna do about it? 

He was gonna show you exactly who had the upper hand.

*your POV uwu*

You would never say it out loud, but you only wore The Dress for days exactly like this: to torture your boyfriend. And honestly? You didn’t think you could go a day without imagining those intensely gifted fingers on (or in) you for another goddamn hour. But you also couldn’t say that.

So you had decided that morning to show him instead - he always was a visual learner...

You had been talking to Evie and eating your plate of bacon and hashbrowns when you felt two large, calloused hands collapse on your shoulder blades.

“Evie, mind if I steal the lady away for a second?” He drawled lowly. The way he said it combined with the weight of his hands on your body hit your core instantly.

Eve rolled her eyes, smirking. “If ‘a second’ is all it’ll take.” You smiled tightly at her as you allowed your boyfriend to guide you, albeit rather roughly, back to the van. Immediately as you got inside he pushed you up against the fridge and you winced from the pain.

“Jimmy, what the-” He stopped you with his mouth on yours, open and hungry, his hands working up the back of your thighs, causing a moan to erupt from you on impact into his mouth.

“You knew exactly what you were doing to me out there, and you thought it was a fuckin’ okay idea to tease me?” He lowered his mouth to your earlobe and downward, light nibbles on hot skin turning to harsh bites. You could feel his fully hardened cock against your heat and you wanted more than ANYTHING for those jeans to be off his body.

“I-I’m sorry, baby I just thought you’d li- oh fuck, Jimmy” You gasped, as he’d found that place right above your collar bone that (as he came to found out) was one of the most sensitive spots on your torso. Smirking against your skin, he traced the area with open mouthed kisses and began to bite again, leaving you attempting to stifle breathy high pitched whines.

“What was that, babydoll?” His hands picked up your thighs and brought your legs around his waist, pressing you harder against the fridge.

“I said I’m sorry” you gasped, pained by the feeling and the need for him. He smirked, bringing his thumb up to your chin and kneading it lightly.

“Aw, princess, I’m not mad at you. But the way I see it is that I’m gonna split that sweet little pussy of yours open with these-” he dragged his two fore fingers across your bruised collar bone, and looked back up at you.

“-and then you’re going to come so hard you can’t breathe. Sound good, baby?” He smiled softly at you. You bit your lip to hold back a moan and did your best to nod without moving any part of his body out of place. He chuckled watching you, and without a moments notice lifted you with toned tensed biceps and carried you to the bed, an array of heavy kisses being exchanged on the journey.

He dropped you on the bed watching as your breasts moved from the impact and groaned at the sight. He looked into your bright/dark eyes and flipped the lower half up, breath hitching in his throat. God, was he the luckiest fucker this side of the Mississippi. 

“Jesus, baby, you’re so goddamn beautiful,” he breathed, a dopey smile plastered on his face as he attacked you with kisses on your face, making you giggle at his soft demeanor.

“For someone so mad a second ago you seem to suddenly be pretty forgiving,” you laughed.

“I can still be mad but have eyes, Y/N, don’t get your panties in a twist” he scoffed, smiling into the crook of your neck.

“Oh, so I still get to keep my panties on by the end of this little argument?” You purred dragging your hands slowly down the back of his white tank top, barely touching him. And just like that, he was back to the state he was before. Instantly, he sat up and unbuckled his jeans, taking the brown belt in his hands he forced your wrists onto the headboard. 

“Now, just when did I say that?” He growled, tightening the hold on the belt. You knew your wrists would be raw as hell after however long this escapade took but strangely enough - that only got you more slick.

“JImmy, please” you whimpered, pleading with his whiskey eyes. He leaned back on his knees and began to slowly creep his tough and warm hands up and down your legs, inching his perfect fingers to your thighs at an agonizingly slow pace. 

“Angel,” he purred “you know I can’t help you if you don’t use your words.” You moaned at the idea of his fingers getting closer to where you needed them, tugging on the belt but forgetting (this bastard-)

“JImmy, please gimme”

“Give you what, baby? Tell me what you need, yeah?” He slid his fingers right outside of your clothed core and gently kneaded the skin there, pushing lightly, sending your back upward as you let out a loud moan.

“Jimmy, please, give me your fingers” you pushed out. He bit his lip at the sight of you, red faced, needy, and ready to be torn apart. His breath hitched as he slid two fingers inside you, not being able to tease you for very much longer. He needed you to come apart, to be unraveled as soon as possible - but not without a price.

“There you go” he whispered roughly, his fingers working against you the way you needed them to. You felt like your core was getting pried apart and hearing his fingers only sink deeper into your heat made you even more wet. He moved his fingers in you faster once he was completely in you, and started to jut his hips toward you involuntarily as he imagined how you would feel around his cock since it’d been so long-

“God, you’re so tight for me, Y/N, fuck” he choked out harshly, ghosting his thumb over your clit, tracing circles where you needed it. “Almost like this pussy was made for me, isn’t it baby?”

The sudden gentleness, however, retreated as fast as it arrived, as he picked up the pace, curling his fore fingers in you at an iron-hot speed. You felt your wrists becoming rawer and rawer by the second as your body strained for release to touch him, to imagine feeling your hands clawing his back and feverishly running your fingers through his coiffed hair. You screamed out harshly as he found your most sensitive point. You felt the white hot tension in your stomach as you approached your release.

“JIm, baby, please I’m-I’m so-” and then you felt him pull his fingers out, whining at the loss of contact. He cocked his head at you, eyeing you up and down biting his lip.

“You always want things, so easy, lovebug,” he said softly. Leaning all the way back so he returned to his knees at the edge of the bed. He pulled his shirt off and started to unbutton his pants, his fully erect cock straining against his boxers. You drooled at the sight of him almost completely naked. 

He dipped his head once he knew you were calmed down enough, pressing sloppy kisses on your calves up to the lower part of your thighs. He hitched a leg up on his shoulder, looking up at you first for consent and licking a stripe up your folds. 

“You taste as good as you look, little girl” he growled against you, the vibrations sending your head flying backward a squeak erupting from your lips. 

“Should I taste more of you? I don’t know if you deserve it little girl. You looked like you wanted one of the boys to take a turn with you before me. Or did you act like a whore today all for me?” he bit your inner thigh lightly, sucking on the skin there like it was gold. You cried out hoarsely, desperately pulling on his hair.

“Only for you, Jim, I promise” you feel him smirk against you as he began sucking onto your sensitive bud, your arousal building in your stomach like a fire pit. His fingers continuing to work against you as you felt release inching nearer again.

“Please, Jimmy, please” his tongue curling pressure where you needed him, the weight of him against you pooling what felt like everywhere in your system.

“Go on, honey, go on and come for me and tell me who this pussy belongs to” he pressed your hips to the bed as you cried out his name in release of everything he’d done to you.

“Jimmy, that was-“

“Good? Don’t sound so surprised” he teased softly winking up at you. His hand slid to the back of your dress, dancing along the zipper.

“But you didn’t think you were done here, did you, little girl?”

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-valves]

How about some cook Cavendish satisfying Drax with pleanty of food. digging Drax' ass out of a dumpster and showing him what actual food is, giving him pleanty to feat on~

-cursed

This sounds tender as SHIT. Let's fucking go.

Cavendish pulled the top off the pot, taking an inhale. Soup smelled good, it should be ready soon. He added more salt, before putting the top back on. It was late at night, and everyone else was asleep, but Cavendish couldn't sleep. He knew he needed it though, so he decided a nice, hot meal would soothe him. Usually Otto cooked, but he was happy to make something of his own. A nice stew, coupled with some fresh bread (that he didn't at all steal from Brownlee's food stash), he made more than enough food.

"The hell?"

He was about to heat up the bread, when he heard a commotion outside. Something was out there, digging into the box of scraps just outside.

"Fuckin' told that damn cabin boy to dump the scraps."

He grabbed a kitchen knife, and went outside. Probably some rat. Had they not been disease ridden, biting bastards, he would've ignored it. He walked slowly, knife raised, when the damn thing turned around. It wasn't a rat, it was worse. Henry Drax. He was digging into the FUCKING trash, like an animal. Cavendish sighed, as a means of both disgust, and relief. At least Drax wasn't a biter. Usually.

"Fucking hell Drax-the hell you doing out here?"

"Hungry. But I can't go back into the damn kitchen."

"You kept eatin' shit, didn't you?"

"Otto maybe a godly man, but he's a stingy fuckin' bastard."

Drax was an absolute scavenger. He'd always hang around a kitchen, stealing little bits of food, even when Otto was just trying to cook. Cavendish had seen it first hand, and until he was booted from the kitchen, it was pretty damn funny.

"Are you actually eating from there?"

"Aye. Wasteful man. Still meat on these bones, and these tomatoes are still good."

Cavendish watched as Drax dug his foul teeth into a juicy, spoiled tomato, letting the juices run down his ever messy beard. Cavendish didn't love this man in the slightest, but he'd be heartless not to feed a man digging out of old scraps.

"You're a fuckin' mutt- come on."

He smacked the tomato out of his hand, and put his hand behind his back, ushering him back into the kitchen. Drax was clearly upset about the lack of his snack, but he didn’t get a chance to bitch as he sat him down at the table. Drax looked like he wanted to get up, even, but Cavendish knew just what would make him stay. He pulled his flask from his coat pocket, placing it on the table. Drax chuckled, getting comfy in his seat.

“Know how to get me to stay, Micheal.”

He only called him that in private. When not a soul walked in between them. Cavendish waved his hand at him dismissively, He added oil to the bread, and stuffed it into the tiny oven. As glorious as the Volunteer was, Cavendish could make a complaint in regards to the kitchen’s size. He felt cramped in here, not just amongst the damn clutter in here, but with Drax just sitting there, nursing the rest of the flask (greedy bastard, thing was full when he got it to him). It was a bit much, but in a way, it was comforting. Just a slow, brief break from the bullshit at sea. No Sumner, no Brownlee, no insurance tricks, no whaling. Just the smell of a fresh pot of soup, and herbed bread. He turned off when he smelled the bread, just how his mother always did.

“You better stay here, Henry. Too much food here for my lonesome, and if Otto found out I cooked, he’d never let me back out into the ice.”

“He likes someone to talk to. As if Sumner wasn’t enough.”

“Maybe it’s redheads.”

They both chuckled. They knew Otto. the caring, protective type that favored the more feminine, soft men. Men who could pass off for the usual whore. Cavendish finished cutting the bread, adding it to the plates, and alongside the bowls of soup, brought it over to the table. Drax had that hungry look in his eyes, and it was one of the few times where it didn’t unsettle him. Drax, as usual, didn’t savor his food the way any person would. He ate the way a hungry animal would, slurping loudly, teeth tugging at the meat and lips slurping the bones clean. He went in with the spoon when he had to, but when he needed meat, he tucked in like a brute.

“Ya mam never taught you how to eat, did she?”

“Hungry. I ain’t eatin’ with royalty, afterall.”

“As if you’d change for royalty.”

Drax grinned, beads of beef broth dripping from his teeth and into his beard. He rubbed at the mess in his beard, wiping it on his coat, then continuing to feast. Cavendish was no man of status either, but he at least knew how to cherish a meal. The salt in the soup, the sweetness of the carrots, the starchiness of the potatoes, the gaminess of the meat- all which sat moist in the salty broth, seasoned by the bones. And the bread. Crunchy, yet still somewhat soft on the inside. Better than any hardtack they were given. 

“Good soup, Micheal.”

He watched as Drax’s lips curled around the soup, noisy as he drank. He’d give the man one thing; he wasn’t fussy. He picked the bones clean, even stripping it off his cartilage, and even licking the crumbs from the bread off the plate. Man was starving. He groaned to himself upon finishing. He wasn’t sated, but he was a little more tame than before. Cavendish wasn’t even done with his soup by the time Drax sat there, licking the residue off of the rim of his bowl. His tongue was greedy, appreciative of every single drop. Cavendish sighed, getting up, and offering his hand to Drax.

“Quit lickin’ the damn thing, I’ll give ya more.”

“I don’t like wastin’ any of it. You don’t know when it'll be the next time you'll eat.”

Cavendish rolled his eyes. Knowing Drax, he’d live. Man would kill and eat an animal raw, with his own teeth if he had to. He went back into the kitchen, filling up the bowl, and giving the man the last piece of the bread. He gave it back to him, and watched as Drax finally ate like a person. Well, closer to a person anyway. He didn’t dig into it like a hungry wolf, but rather, he savored it, as though it was the least meal he’d ever eat. Cavendish nodded, tucking into his bread after having it soak up some of the soup.

“Finally slowing down, though I’d watch you choke.”

“Aye, I do the choking ‘round here, lest you forget, Micheal.”

Henry shot him a wink, just as he was tearing the strips of flesh from the bone. You could always tell when Henry was eating. He slurped, he moaned, he groaned, his teeth ground against bone. It was an experience for Henry. Didn’t matter what it was. Just that there was enough for him. Henry would still enjoy himself, as if a proper whore was blowing him during his meal. It was annoying as hell to most, but not to Cavendish. All he heard was a hungry, eager man.

“Surprised you don’t eat the damn bone, Henry.”

“Don’t throw ‘em out, I’ll suck on them like hard candies.”

Probably why he hadn’t tossed them to the floor, but rather, kept them on his plate, as if he wasn’t done with it just yet. Cavendish had finished his meal quite some time ago, but he had no issues sitting there, watching and listening to Drax’s animilatistic sounds. By the time he finished, he sat back, licking his fingers over and over again. He finally looked sated, relaxed. Cavendish stood up, taking his bowl, and bringing him another. Drax looked hesitant, even as he sat there, suckling on bits of bones, but Cavendish knew Drax could never turn down a meal. He accepted it, helping himself to more of the soup. Cavendish sat down again, watching Drax gorge himself further.

“Never know when you might eat again, eh Henry?”

“Free food is free food, I’d sooner perish than waste a morsel. Especially knowing you made it for me. Almost sweet of ya.”

“Suck my prick, Henry, I just don’t want to smell trash in your breath, next we meet. You already smell like cheap booze and smoke.”

“You like that smell, they all do.”

He smirked. He didn’t notice the broth run down his arm at first, and had to take a second to run his greasy, greedy tongue up his arm. Cavendish swore he saw the dirt and grime graze off his tongue, and he was surprised that even HE didn’t flinch at the taste of himself. He finished the new bowl of soup, far less quickly than the rest of them. He did finish however, leaning back in his chair. He looked exhausted, and the sigh that escaped his mouth let Cavendish know he was about to pop. Drax reached for his belt, and unbuckled himself, letting himself free of his cloth confines. Cavendish watched as he rubbed at his hairy, plump stomach, slowly. As if he was taunting him. The damn thing was nudging the table in its size, and Cavendish swore he never saw the man so docile. So vulnerable and content with himself. Cavendish got up again, and poured the rest of the broth into the bowl. Just enough for one more. Just a little something extra to push him.

“Alright, you can finish the pot, since ya hungrier and uglier than any pest I’ve ever seen.”

Drax burped into his hand, lightly shaking his head in protest. Drax ate enough to feed a number of men, the fact that he didn’t cough it all back up was a surprise to anyone who didn’t know him. He put his hand on his belly, giving it a nice pat. Soft, hairy, and hot from the oh so big meal he just finished eating. Drax sighed, but pushed himself through it, bringing the broth to his mouth, and greedily slurping at the remains. Cavendish had to hold onto the bowl for him, nursing him like a wee babe, and oh so carefully massaging his big, bulging stomach. Drax gasped as he finished, as if he had just put his head underwater.

“Alright, I’m done now, Micheal.”

“Should be, you finished the pot.”

Cavendish took the plates and put them away (leaving it for someone else to clean, obviously), only to come back with something in his hands. Drax looked damn near dazed, before he looked at the wrapping in his hands, suspicious, as if it were a damn weapon.

“Hell is that?”

“Dessert.”

Granted, they were old, but desserts were desserts. He held onto Drax’s chin, forcing his mouth open and pushing the treat past his lips. They were simple ginger cookies he picked up before they left for shore, but they were still fairly tasty. Not that Drax noticed. His poor body ached and his stomach grumbled, begging for him to stop. Drax the vision of gluttony, greed, and lust. He stuffed the rest of the cookie in his mouth, and upon Drax FINALLY swallowing, Cavendish pressed his lips against his, slowly gracing his tongue with his own. The taste of beef, booze, and sugar, was exactly what Cavendish craved. He looked into his dazed eyes, lightly patting his cheek.

“Better not catch you digging through the trash next time, Drax. You want yourself stuffed, you come to me. Get it?”

“...Aye.”

He patted his stomach once more. He was a filthy, greasy, fat, barbaric man.

Was it any wonder he had to dive in for seconds?

[immaculate-benediction-batch]

"John,

I'd like to direct your attention

To something that needs directing to

A lot of people talk about

Dining in and eating out

I guess that's what this is all about"

"I know this is not a dining room conversation

And you don't have to listen if you don't have the time

But let me remind you

In case you don't already know

Dining out can happen down below"

"Everybody's talkin' 'bout

Wanting that and needing this

I'd just like to know

If you want to learn a different kind of kiss"

"So won't you, go down

Where it's warm inside, go down

Where I cannot hide, go down

Where all life begins, go down

That's where my love is"

"Now what could be better than a home cooked meal

How you want to eat it depends on how you feel

You can eat all you want and you don't get fat

Now where else can you go for a meal like that

It's not fair to be selfish or stingy

Every boy should experience eating out

Sometimes when I come home from a hard day at work

I swear it's all I can think about"

"So won't you, go down

Where it's warm inside, go down

Where I cannot hide, go down

Where all life begins, go down

That's where my love is"

"Colonel Sanders says it best

"Finger lickin' good"

Let's put what you've learned to the test

Can you make a fire without using wood

Are you still hungry

Aren't you glad you came

I'm glad you brought your rain coat

I think it's beginning to rain"

"So won't you, go down

Where it's warm inside, go down

Where I cannot hide, go down

Where all life begins, go down

That's where my love is"

"Where it's warm inside, go down

Where I cannot hide, go down

Where all life begins, go down

That's where my love is

That's where my love is

Come inside, that's where all life begins

It's warm inside"

[beardycarrot]

Mike Jeavons has been doing a week on KFC, and wow, did that make me want some chicken. It didn’t make me want KFC, necessarily; I’ve long since given up on them. As Austin McConnell can explain in more detail, KFC has really gone downhill, to the point that unless you’ve got an exceptional location in your area, it’s not worth going. Well, in the US, anyway; according to Mike, UK KFCs are decent, functioning restaurants.

Anyway, today it was nearly two p.m. and all I’d eaten was a vitamin, so while I was in the area I gave in to my curiosity and went to KFC.

Alright, first off, this highly-detailed Colonel Sanders face is terrifying. I mean, it does look like him (since I’m just linking to a bunch of YouTube videos, here he is on What’s My Line), but it’s unsettling when you’re used to the simpler, more stylized version. Alright Sanders, lemme just... crack open your skull...

This isn’t a Fast Food Firsts, as years ago I used to have KFC once or twice a month, but if you’re going to judge a restaurant it should be with their signature dishes. I got a three-piece box, which is a thigh, two legs, a biscuit, and a side of your choice. I chose the mashed potatoes.

I’ve never been a big fan of KFC mashed potatoes, having grown up in Idaho eating actual made-fresh-from-boiled-tubers mashed potatoes. They’re okay, but they’re just so... smooth. No texture to them at all. Honestly, the instant mashed potatoes I buy when I’m in the mood for such a thing are better than this... but again, weird smoothness aside, they’re not bad. The gravy’s pretty good though.

While the biscuit wasn’t the worst part of the meal, it was by far the most disappointing. Even after KFC started getting not-so-great, they still had good, buttery biscuits, and I feel like someone who’s had them won’t be too surprised to learn that people would sometimes go through the KFC drive-through just to get a box of biscuits. Unfortunately, at least today and at that location, the biscuits weren’t even worth finishing. I did eat all of it, because I was hungry, but it was so dry and crumbly that I was thankful I got a meal that came with a drink.

Finally, the chicken. This actually didn’t look too bad! The last time I’d had KFC, maybe four years ago, the breading was pretty light and anemic-lookin’. As you can see, this is a nice golden-brown, and best of all, not at all greas--

EURGH. Yeah, uhhh. I don’t know what happens to the chicken when it comes out of the fryer... but the underside of this piece was absolutely saturated with grease. Maybe they just stick them in a basket lined with not-nearly-absorbant-enough paper or something... it’s the best explanation I can come up with. How about a leg piece? That should have less surface area in contact with whatever they’re stored in, and in theory should be--

...Juuuust as greasy. The chicken isn’t terrible... it’s not the worst thing I’ve eaten, or even the worst chicken I’ve gotten from this KFC. The breading is flavorful and crunchy, and the meat doesn’t taste like it’s been pumped up with anything to artificially increase the chicken-ie flavor of it, which has been an issue in the past. Best of all, it wasn’t slimy! Yeah, for some reason, KFC developed a reputation for there being kind of a... slime layer, between the breading and meat. Maybe they were just using chickens with fattier skin for a while, I have no idea, but it was disgusting. Now, however?

Well, it’s not slimy, but it’s still pretty gross in its own way. Here you can see where a couple of grooves have formed, presumably where the leg was in contact with the fryer basket... and uhh, those are just saturated with oil. Yum.

KFC is still “finger-lickin’ good”, but only because it’s so greasy that you WILL need that entire dispenser’s worth of napkins they give you. Again, this is only one location (which also happens to be a Taco Bell), and I visited about an hour after peak time... but the point of convenience meals is that they’re convenient, right? In any case, aside from the top layer of breading on the thigh, this was pretty bad, and I feel gross for having eaten it. I won’t be returning anytime soon.

...and I won’t need to, because check out what I found at the grocery store!

I’m not really sure how you coat a gravy, but I’m excited to learn!

[ao3feed-mfmm]

Hot and Bothered aka Biscuit Fic

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2QXUXDL

by 221A_brina

Things heat up at City South and almost come to blows. (Insert suggestive eyebrow waggle & smirk here.) Initially in a very not good, really bad way. But it gets better. I promise. Aka: Yet another silly/crazy Slack conversation resulting in ficcing shagnanigans? Argument/Biscuit Fic... finally.

Words: 7512, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: F/M

Characters: Phryne Fisher, Jack Robinson, Hugh Collins

Relationships: Phryne Fisher/Jack Robinson, Phryne Fisher & Jack Robinson

Additional Tags: Arguments and Anger, Bickering and Biscuits, Cookies and Canoodling, Distractions and Dalliances, E Is For Everyone, Play Sta-tion, Major SERIOUS Anger, Like really angry, Not kidding, fair warning, Potential trigger warning, (Though I Hope Not), You're Supposed To Feel Uncomfortable, But It Gets Better (Promise), She Turned Me Into A Newt, I Got Better, First Time, (At Least That's What THEY Said, How Is Harvey Wallbanger One Word?!, No Harvey But Definitely Wall Banging, And Desk Dancing, Office Shagnanigans, kiss and make up, Afternoon (Or Is It Evening?) Delight, debriefing, Knickers In A Twist, Panty Raid, finger lickin' good, Tasty Treat, HUNGRY!, Hungry Jack!

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2QXUXDL

[jstiin]

𝐦 𝐲 𝐭 𝐫 𝐮 𝐭 𝐡﹔shq interview.

‘ can i just say that it’s been a long ass time since i’ve done one of these, so, like, don’t roast my ass. i’m nervous. just expect me to say what everyone’s too scared to say ─── also, is this gonna take all day ? i bought chipotle ‘nd i really wanna eat it, i’m pretty hungry. no ? okay. cool. ’

it’s rumored that your recent arrest is directly linked to shawn mendes. according to our sources, you absolved shawn of any wrongdoing and took the blame for the entire incident. in light of shawn’s actions, including the subtweets, and refusal to acknowledge you, do you regret it? do you wish you would’ve been honest about shawn’s involvement knowing that he would so easily turn his back on you?

whew, y’all are clearly startin’ off on some shit with these fuckin’ questions. but, uh, i promised that i’d be honest n’ willing to cooperate so …. do i regret takin’ the blame for shawn ? uh, for sure, just like any person in my situation probably would. i went from feelin’ like a caged animal cause of the paps, the fans, the meet n’ greets, camera’s all in my face, you know ? n’ this was before this shit got stuck to my ankle, mind you. to being an actual animal locked up in my crib all day. but for the sole purpose of him turning his back on me ? no, that would be an entirely new level of fucked up. keep in mind that this is comin’ from me. i’m not mad, or upset with shawn ─── alright, i am, but i would never drag ‘em back into this shit. it’s been complete hell for me inside n’ he’s struggling out there on the outside, so, who’s really winnin’ here ? i just want shawn to realize two things. one, being that i’ve always been there for him when it mattered the most. two, i need him. that’s what it comes down to. i want my brother back.

sofia carson confirmed in her interview that you two were seeing each other. given all that we know (and what is rumored to be true) about sofia, are you sure that you want to be in another relationship with an emotionally damaged woman? do you honestly see yourself with her in a longterm setting, or are you just living in the moment? and what is your opinion on her relationship with shawn? do you think cutting sofia off would heal your friendship with shawn?

ay, i’m already gettin’ claimed ? is she gonna see this ? hey baby, what’s up ? alright, let me stop. but, uh, am i sure ? dude, i have never been more sure about anythin’ in my entire life. i’m fucked up, she’s …. well, ‘ emotionally damaged ’ ─── i like that, can i use that ? but we just work well together, i think. she doesn’t call me out on my shit, or throw my past in my face, what we have is new n’ everyday brings us somethin’ new. as for whether longterm or not, did you ask her this question ? can i know her answer ? either way, i’m takin’ the day by day thing very seriously, so, yeah. i know it’s been a fuckin’ rollercoaster ride between ‘em two, comin’ from someone who has seen shit with his own eyes. you know ? n’ of course ya’ll are going to think that i hate ‘em if i say something bad, or want ‘em to be together if i can somethin’ good. but, quite honestly, i don’t care. just as long as sofia n’ i are okay, it’s whatever. oh, n’ for sure. cuttin’ off sofia would for sure land me back into shawn’s arms. is it right though for me to cut her off just to get my friend back ? nah.

your career has been on a standstill for a long time now. have you lost your passion for music? are you working on anything new? do you fear that your time is over with? and what about your recent release of your fashion line? is that something you can see taking over music in your life?

damn, i didn’t know this was turnin’ into a draggin’ session. thanks for knockin’ me off whatever pedestal i thought i was on, shit. i’ll have you know that i’ve been in the studio, whenever i have permission to, n’ ya’ll will be hearin’ something from me pretty soon. can’t say when, but your boy is never really over. yeah, ‘ drew house ’ has been somethin’ that i’ve been interested in for the longest fuckin’ time, but the time was never really right until now. you know ? it’s just somethin’ to do in the meantime while this whole music shit works itself out, honestly. plus, a superstar does a million things at once. that’s me.

you’ve been renown for your good looks. however, recently, it seems like you’ve stopped taking care of yourself. your fans have been worried about you. every time you’re seen out in public, you appear very solemn. how is your mental health doing? do you blame the chaotic people in your life (shawn, sofia, ariana just to name a few) for bringing you down? do you ever wish you had a different life? a different group of friends?

again, way to make a guy feel really fuckin’ good at himself here. thanks. but i’m fine, as fine as a guy could possibly be. i’m taking everything easy, doin’ things that make me happy, surroundin’ myself with a shorty who makes me happy, n’ everything under the sun. i also can’t point fingers at anyone since the only one who allows ‘em to take control of my emotions is me, so, yeah. different life ? nah, i know the impact my existence n’ my music has had on people, so takin’ that away would just be a slap in the face. what i’m about to say may be a slap in the face, too, but different friends would definitely improve my life. i mean, people think havin’ a hard exterior means there’s an equally hard interior, but that’s rarely the case. i stay in my feelings, and people just give up on me when i would go above ‘n beyond for ‘em. it’s the truth, and all of those people that you named know that shit. so … yeah, do i want a new group of friends ? doesn’t everyone ?

critics of your relationship with sofia would state she is using you to move on from shawn mendes. however, people neglect to remember your whirlwind romance with madelaine petsch that ended shortly before you began to see sofia. are you guilty of the same tactics? using someone else to get over another? and how has this affected your friendship with madelaine’s boyfriend, joe keery? are you two on better terms, or do you still resent him for intervening on your relationship with madelaine?

thought about that myself, n’ i just don’t get that vibe from sofia. call me crazy, stupid, whatever fuckin’ name in the book, but i genuinely don’t feel like she would do that to me ? nor would i do that shit to her ? that situation with madelaine happened months  ago, which led to months of me actin’ up. i had my fun, did whatever i wanted to do n’ then sofia came along, let’s not. listen, i wouldn’t say that joe n’ i will be lickin’ whip cream from each other’s assholes anytime soon, but i’m over it. from what i’ve heard, they’re more than happy together, shorty even has a bun in the oven. like, tell me, should i still be dwellin’ over this situation ? no. she made her decision n’ whether or not i agreed, the only option would be to move the fuck on. so i did. simple. do i resent ‘em ? as a human, i’m sure that shit will always be in the back of my mind, but at this point, i just want that keery dude … hell, everyone too, to just be happy n’ leave my name outta their fuckin’ mouths. simple.

am i done ? hopefully i didn’t piss off too many people with my answers, but guess what ? the honest truth hurts sometimes n’ that’s the truest tea. uh, yeah, if you have a problem with me then beat my ass or just stop talkin’ about me ! it’s not rocket science. sofia, if you’re reading this, we made it ! we famous ! shawn, if you’re reading this … i miss you. n’ my final thing, can anyone tell me who this ‘ g r e g g ’ person is ? i’ve been hearin’ that name everywhere. weird.

[einsteinsugly]

It's finger-lickin' good, 2004.

Donna (holding a pill bottle, with Eric's name on it): Why didn't you tell me your cholesterol is so freaking high, you need medication?

Eric: Because then you'd deprive me of some of life's joys, Donna. So I've hidden it, ever so discreetly...

Donna: I'm going to deprive you of some of life's joys, all right.

Donna leaves the kitchen, and Eric sighs.

Eric (mumbling): Oh, crap.

Cut to, dinner time. In the kitchen.

Eric: What is this?

Donna: Skinless chicken breast, with baked potatoes and peas.

Eric (noticing a box of KFC, with multiple sides and biscuits): And what is your wonderful dinner, for you and the girls?

Donna: KFC. With mashed potatoes and mac and cheese.

Eric: You're playing dirty. Usually, I like it, but this time, I don't.

Donna and the girls (especially the girls) nearly gag.

Kate (with a sigh): Dad, at this point, even if you didn't have high cholesterol, you deserve that skinless chicken breast.

Cut to, eating dinner. Leah has an agenda.

Leah: Mom, don't you have high cholesterol, too?

Donna: Nowhere near as high as your father's. *Glaring at Eric* I don't need to take freaking medication.

Eric: Well, I think you need to be proactive, and take one for the team. And eat some skinless chicken breast with me.

Donna: At this rate, you're not seeing any skin from me for a long, long time.

Once again, the girls nearly gag.

Kate: Mom, I don't even want to think about that. Or the bird and the bees...

Leah (to Kate): Stop, you're making it worse.

Two minutes later. Leah still has an agenda. She's toying with her food, eying Eric.

Leah: I'm not that hungry.

Eric (getting the gist, reading her mind): Me either.

Donna (groaning): How convenient. You both think can fool Ani, and you don't, but you're definitely not fooling me...

Leah: She's cool. She lets the fried chicken adventures slide, and you don't.

An hour later. Eric's watching TV in the den, all by himself. Leah plops herself on the couch, passing over some food. While keeping a little bit for herself.

Leah (quietly): I set aside some leftovers for you. And I even nuked it, so it's nice and warm.

Eric (receiving said goodies quietly): Thanks. I knew I could count on you, little rascal...

Donna (from the living room): I smell fried chicken, you morons.

Leah: Daddy, quick!

Eric eats the chicken, as fast as he possibly can. On piece number three, Donna enters the room.

Donna: You're both massive morons, you know that?

[uncannyresemblance]

Feed My Frankenstein

Alice Cooper

+

"Yes, yes, I know you're hungry

Ah, and here comes dinner"

Feed my Frankenstein

Well, I ain't evil

I'm just good lookin'

Start a little fire

And baby start cookin'

I'm a hungry man

But I don't want pizza

I'll blow down your house

And then I'm gonna eat ya

Bring you to a simmer

Right on time

Run my greasy fingers

Up your greasy spine

Feed my Frankenstein

Meet my libido

"He's a psycho"

Feed my Frankenstein

Hungry for love, and it's feeding time

You don't want to talk

So baby shut up

And let me drink the wine from your fur tea cup

Velcro candy, sticky sweet

Make my tattoos melt in the heat

Well, I ain't no veggie

Like my flesh on the bone

Alive and lickin' on your ice cream cone

Feed my Frankenstein

Meet my libido

"He's a psycho"

Feed my Frankenstein

Hungry for love, and it's feeding time

Baby whoa-whoa oh yeah

Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

Whoa-whoa baby chow down

Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

"He's a psycho"

Feed my Frankenstein

Meet my libido

"He's a psycho"

Feed my Frankenstein

Hungry for love, and it's "lunch time"

Baby whoa-whoa oh yeah

Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

Whoa-whoa baby chow down

Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

Feed my Frankenstein

Meet my libido

"He's such a psycho"

Feed my Frankenstein

Hungry for love, and it's feeding time

Baby whoa-whoa oh yeah

Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

Whoa-whoa baby chow down

Feed my Frankenstei-ei-ein

[jigneshthanki-blog]

TOP 5 Food and Beverage Companies who have expanded User base via Amazon Alexa Skills

Are you the owner of a pizza shop, restaurant, coffee shop or an online food ordering/ delivery marketplace platform? If you own any of these, then you must be thinking of bringing in technology innovations to the picture to see off competitors.

Many existing food businesses and startups are facing fierce competition in the food industry. So what can be done? How to make your mark in the market? Of course, adoption of various technology solutions like iBeacon, Internet of Things (IoT) and custom mobile app development has helped a lot.

But the one modest innovation we are looking at for food businesses is the custom developed Amazon Alexa Voice Skills. Smart speakers like Amazon Echo and Echo Dot are gaining popularity leveraging Voice Skill development and businesses have started realizing its potential.

Top 5 Food and Beverage Companies Reaping Rewards through Alexa Skills:

Every single week, the volume of Amazon Alexa Skills development is surging and businesses are adopting customized Alexa skills given the benefits of voice first technology.

Let us take a look at Top 5 Food and Beverage companies who have successfully adopted Alexa skills for their business and reaped rewards.

1. Dominos

Ordering a Pizza from Dominos is a straightforward process in most of the cases. Customers order their favorite pizzas to the same location with the same card (Credit/ Debit) details. This was the perfect case while experimenting custom Alexa skill back in 2013. And guess what? It was bingo.

Alexa is making ordering your Domino’s favorites even easier. With the Domino’s Alexa Skill, you can build a new order from scratch, place your Easy Order or your most recent order. You can ask Alexa for your order’s status with Domino’s Tracker.

To get started, just say “Alexa, open Domino’s.” Alexa will connect you to Domino’s and get you ordering and tracking in no time.

2. Grubhub

Grubhub is a leading online and mobile food ordering and delivery marketplace dedicated to connecting diners with local takeout restaurants. We at Let’s Nurture are experts in ideating clone food delivery apps for Zomato, Grubhub, etc. Hence, we exactly know the nature of the food ordering process and customer demands for the same.

Grubhub Introduces its Amazon Alexa Skill “Reorder with Grubhub” to make food ordering easier than ever before. The new Grubhub skill for Alexa will make it easier for customers to reorder food from Grubhub’s network of more than 50,000 restaurants using only their voice.

You may like to read: Cost to develop Alexa Skills for Online Food Marketplace

Diners can then open the Grubhub skill for Alexa with a selection of prompts such as, “Alexa, open Grubhub” or, “Alexa, tell Grubhub I’m hungry”. Alexa will respond with, “Welcome to Grubhub! Here are the latest orders available for reorder”. Diners can then choose which option they would like to reorder and Alexa places the order for the diner providing an estimated time of when it will be ready.

3. Starbucks

Amazon Alexa skills can also be used effectively to transform the customer experience for cafes too. Now leveraging Amazon Alexa skills, users can tell Alexa to place your favorite coffee or anything else from the shop.

American coffee company and coffeehouse Starbucks does not require an introduction, does it? Starbucks recently released a skill for Alexa – “Starbucks Reorder” which allows you to place your favorite order using only your voice. The setup is quick but requires a little more work than your typical Alexa skill.

To be able to use the skill, you will need to have previously placed an order for a drink using the Starbucks app. If you haven’t, you will need to place an order through the app first.

Just say, “Alexa, enable Starbucks Reorder.” To be able to use the skill, you will need to have previously placed an order for a drink using the Starbucks app. If you haven’t, you will need to place an order through the app first.

After you’ve placed an order with the Starbucks app, you will be able to set up and use the skill. Just say, “Alexa, open Starbucks.” Alexa will then tell you what your usual order is, how much it costs and for which store the order will be placed. You will then need to confirm or cancel the order. Isn’t it that simple? What else could be better for a hands-free coffee ordering experience on-the-go?

4. KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken)

KFC is America’s fast food restaurant chain who also has come up with an innovative Alexa Skill called ‘KFC Chicken Talk’ in KFC Canada. For India, they have come up with custom Alexa Skill called ‘KFC India’ too. By enabling this custom Alexa skill, KFC has been successful in bringing the next-gen eating experience by building on factors like ease of access, digital menus, personalized engagement, etc.

With ‘KFC Chicken Talk’, a finger-lickin’ good conversation starts where Alexa will entertain users with multiple jokes, pick-up lines, random thoughts and musings based on one thing only, Chicken. Just say, “Alexa, Talk Chicken To Me” and brace yourself to get served with whole new experience.

“KFC India” users can ask Alexa to order their favorite finger lickin’ dishes by saying, “Alexa, Launch KFC”. Just sit back, relax and wait for your meal to arrive at your doorstep.

5. Apothic Wines

Apothic Wines are among the most distinctively branded and popular wines among millennial consumers. They have come up with their own Alexa skill with a purpose to create an at-home experience that could deepen consumer engagement with the brand and educate current customers more about other Apothic varietals.

Users can ask Alexa to provide a guided wine tasting led by the Alchemist. Probably the best use of voice first technology for Wine lovers. Exploring Apothic Wines has just been a hell lot of easier than before leveraging custom Alexa skill development.

Why even Big Brands are Adding Voice Skills to their Omnichannel Strategy?

Forbes reports that More than 50 percent of food menu searches will be voice-based by 2020.

Businesses of any size in the food industry are focusing on developing and implementing custom voice skills on the app. There are multiple reasons associated with it:

1) Enhanced and Personalised Customer Experience:

Leveraging custom Alexa skill development and/ or Actions on Google (AoG) development, food business owners can provide a consistent, reliable and quality customer experience. Voice-activated menu access and the ordering process are the biggest factors that will boost sales too because people are loving hands-free customer service experience with almost zero follow-ups.

2) Potential to Increase ROI for Food Businesses

Customers can order online complex menu items involving multiple preparation styles, accompaniments and sides, add special instructions, review their order and place it easily, increasing ROI.

3) Improved Operations & Productivity

Alexa can help staff to be more productive throughout the day and stay focused on orders. Custom voice skills can be built to enable staff to manage calendars, make calls, track to-do lists and find information such as the latest sales data, or inventory levels.

Why Choose Let’s Nurture for Restaurant-Specific Alexa Skill Development?

Let’s Nurture is a leading voice skill development company in India, USA, Canada, UK, Singapore, Kuwait, and Australia offering end-to-end voice services and solutions for Google Home, Amazon Echo and Echo Dot Smart speakers. Having developed multiple voice skills, in-house and for a client, you can hire our dedicated Alexa Skill Developers with different flexible engagement models at affordable costs.

The variety of custom voice skills developed by us, for the smart assistant, back many products from diverse sectors like food and beverages, entertainment, task management, home automation, healthcare/telemedicine and extends much beyond this.

If you own a restaurant, cafe or online food marketplace and looking to have similar next-gen voice solutions to boost ROI, Let’s shake hands to build something awesome!