#and it’s like… the suit really isn’t that slutty lmao

[thestobingirlie]

the way ppl frame eddie's attraction to steve is really weird sometimes. like, from the show, we have a scene of him complimenting steve and basically gushing over him being a badass. so on some level we know what he finds physically attractive about steve and you can continue on that same vein. but bc some ppl don't want him to be attracted to steve's masculinity, competence, badassery, etc. they want to act like the "babygirlified" steve is the one eddie is attracted to specifically. i was just thinking about this bc of how you mentioned ppl projecting the fact that they find the sailor uniform cute onto eddie w/o considering whether that actually makes sense for any character involved.

people see steve as attractive, and a lot of those people like feminised steve, and so when writing smutty fics, or even just fics that dive into eddie’s attraction for steve, they insert their own attraction, and not eddie’s, if that makes sense?

like, people find the sailor suit cute, so regardless of any characters actual feelings on the suits (steve and robin’s obvious trauma) the suits are cute and funny in fics! (and hyper sexualised but because it’s being done to steve and not robin, it’s okay!)

anyway! i totally think that if eddie’s attracted to steve, it would be more surrounding his masculinity, his brave nature, his broad shoulders and chest, and the fact that he can tear a bat in two pieces with his bare hands and foot. all of which he actually compliments in the show

i think it especially makes sense if we’re considering the fact that it was steve that made eddie change the way he viewed jocks. if you make steve no longer a jock, then eddie isn’t really learning anything? and he continues on being judgemental of people he doesn’t actually know.

and it’s just really weird because they’re gay men (if we’re doing steddie) and yet people love it when one of them is basically a woman.

(i am not talking about trans hcs, you do you. however i do find it kind of weird when steve is transfem, and the story really only revolves around steddie and nothing else)

[writertothemaximum]

Summary: Fem!Niki fucks the shit out of Rinne at the beach.

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings/Content: nsfw/18+, Niki x Rinne, Female Niki, Face-Sitting, Cunnilingus, Anal fingering, femdom

Notes: Normally I don't post character x character stuff on this blog, but as this is femdom, this is the one exception. I hope you guys enjoy!

Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33432565

Inspired by this pic [Please click!]

With a groan, Rinne drove the van down the sandy road, trying his best not to hit the small child that decided to walk in the middle of the road last second. It was going to be one of these days, wasn’t it?

First, Niki begs him to lunch, it’s the middle of summer and 400 degrees outside, and now she’s proceeded to drag him to the beach so she can ‘eat ice cream on the sand’ or whatever. And here Rinne thought he was the annoying one. She should get her license, it’s bad enough she didn’t graduate high school.

Well, at least she made sure he was well fed and…Well, well-fed.

In the other way.

She was always really forward about that. Or maybe it was him and his sluttiness spilled off onto her.

Yeah, it was probably his fault. He should stop getting stoned with strangers in the living room.

Although Rinne wasn’t like that. Like, aggressive like that.

Neither were any of the men he slept with.

It was scary, almost.

No, it was just scary. She was scary when she got horny.

She always got him so embarrassed, why did she have to take her sweet time with him? Well, it’s not like she could just fuck-and-dump, but still. He always busted it too quickly, far too fast for his liking. Maybe he should go back to just being gay.

Niki thought Rinne looked super sexy today. She supposed he always did, almost to an annoying degree. To the point where men would hit on him in the street and he’d take them home and Niki would be witness to some random dude fucking him on the couch. It was almost never girls for some reason.

Was he gay?

No, she and him fucked all the time, Niki was a girl, that wouldn’t make sense. Rinne was definitely bi, like 100% bisexual.

Ah, he was 100% a bottom, that was all.

Can’t get off without his ass—The absolute whore.

He liked getting called a whore, too, maybe he was also 100% masochist, too. That would make a lot of sense, actually, now that she thought about it some. The way he groaned when she slapped his ass, when she bit his nipple, when she chomped on his neck, nibbled on the tip of his dick—yeah she liked biting him a bit too much.

Well, it was a hot day and it was time for ice cream and sausages on the beach. A nice tan would be cool, too, she was getting a little too pale for her tastes.

He didn’t really ever hit on her, he just kinda let her fuck him. He never got that embarrassed when he was with his male partners. It was like Niki was different to him, somehow. Like he wanted to get teased. Like he was annoyed by it, but secretly, he begged for it.

He always ended up begging for it.

Parking in a non-parking spot, Rinne popped out of the van and opened the side door in the back, grabbing a yellow floatie, a big towel to lie down on, and some sunscreen for good measure.

“Rinne-kun! Did you get the picnic box?” she shouted, running to the back.

“No, because you’d fucking grab it out of my hands, anyways, dick,” he said, sniping back.

Niki held her hand up to punch him in the gut, when she realized.

“Yeah, I would do that,” she said, chuckling out a snort.

Niki climbed around the back of the van, not really caring that her ass was in view for everyone who walked by. Rinne, feeling slightly embarrassed for her, walked in front of the door to block the view.

“What?” she asked.

“I well your, uh,” he said, stumbling. “Your fat ass was falling out of the fucking car!”

She poked a finger out, booping him right in the nose.

“Lmao someone’s embarrassed,” she said, chuckling.

“Oh god, stop using texting lingo in public again,” Rinne said, walking off to the shore, giving up.

“Wait, wait, I know a good spot!” she said, shouting at him.

Niki’s ‘good spot’ was actually a very nice, secluded section of the beach. It took them about ten minutes to find, and they had to climb over a dozen or so rocks, but it ended up giving them some nice shade, and Rinne was never opposed to a good workout.

Rinne spread his arms out to the nice summer wind and took in the world around him, finally allowing the toxic fumes of arrogance and annoyance to leave his body, and breathe in the fresh air of confidence and being a massive dick again.

Niki poked him in the ass.

“Bitch!?” he shouted.

“Are you going to set up the towel or what?” she asked. “I have lunch to eat.”

That’s right, she had carried four lunchboxes over the rocks.

Four. Plus a full tub of Ben and Jerry’s.

“Do I get any this time?” Rinne asked, leaning in. He was a bit hungry, now that he mentioned it.

Niki put a finger to her mouth, the fabric handles of the bags falling down to her elbows.

“Hm,” she said, earnestly considering it. “Maybe if you suck me off.”

“Jesus fuck Niki. You’re horny too?” he said.

She pointed at him, accusatory.

“And you’re not? Who the fuck isn’t horny!?” she shouted.

Rinne sighed and rolled the towel out. He sat down, crossing his legs. He should have invited HiMERU or Eichi or Ibara, or really anyone he could irritate into fucking him. This was wrong, Rinne was supposed to be the tyrannical crazy one, why was Niki walking all over him? It was unacceptable, absolutely unacceptable.

The crashing waves really were relaxing. It was a good thing he had come in his bathing suit.

“Fine,” he said, crawling down on his hands and knees. Niki didn’t seem to hear him, taking a big scoop of sweet chocolate ice cream and dumping the thing directly into her mouth.

His nose pushed into the bottoms of her swimsuit, far too skimpy for any good-natured girl to wear. Tufts of her hair pushed against him, and Rinne wondered why she didn’t shave down there. Whatever, it was just a little hairy and it was about to get a lot wetter.

Niki recoiled in the softness of the towel when she felt shivers ride down her thighs. Rinne flicked his tongue across her clit, stirring up a small sound of approval. He had always been so good at this. Niki wondered if he was just as good at sucking cock. The whole thing felt so relaxing under the heat of the summer sun, she was melting, just absolutely melting.

“Fuck, Niki!” Rinne shouted, jumping up and wiping the glob of ice cream off his back. “Why’d you spill the shit on me?”

“Dunno,” she said, the spoon sticking out of her mouth. She grabbed his head by the puff of his hair and shoved him back into her crotch. “I didn’t tell you to stop. Don’t you want some ice cream?”

“Hanernangh,” was Rinne’s response, his nose suffocating in vaginal secretions.

Leaning back, she squashed Rinne’s head in her thighs, small tufts of red poking out from the little sandwich. Ooh, a sandwich, she should have taken one out of the picnic box, that would have tasted really good right about now.

The wet rubbing felt so good, so good to just squash him right there, struggle around for air, struggle around, knowing that he’d get something out of this, knowing that he’d get rewarded for all his hard work. It god Niki madly turned on knowing that Rinne was getting off to this. Knowing that he liked to get scrunched, to get manhandled.

Niki sat up.

“Hey, Rinne-kun, flip over,” she said.

“Hah? Do I get some now?” he said, snarling. “I wanna get some before you spill it all over me.”

“Turn the fuck over, idiot,” Niki snapped back.

“Fine,” Rinne sputtered out, flipping over to his back.

Niki immediately decided to sit down.

“Hanaefng!?” Rinne shouted, obviously surprised.

“Keep going and you’ll get some ice cream, sheesh,” she said.

Niki began to pat down Rinne’s body, feeling a bit of sand, and a really nice tan beginning to form. And wow, really nice abs, really nice, firm, strong abs. But that wasn’t what she was looking for.

“Aha!” she said, pulling the bottle out of his pocket and slightly raising her ass off his face. “So you did bring lube you fucking whore.”

Rinne took a huge gasp of air, finally able to breathe.

“Jesus fuck, and just what are you going to do with that? It’s not like I can suck you off and fuck you at the same time,” he said, crassly.

Niki, annoyed, sat back down.

“Who said you were going to be the one doing the fucking?” she said, irritated.

Rinne struggled a bit before shuffling his ass out for better access. She had fingered him before, maybe she should invest in a strap-on. Then he wouldn’t have any need to do all of those one-night stands. She could just fuck him on her cock.

“Ooh, someone’s hungry for fingers,” she said, mocking. “Wanna come here for a smoochy-smoochy? I think you deserve it, Rinne-kun!”

Rinne, not being able to speak due to still having pussy in his face, responded with a large groan.

“Or do you prefer these lips?” she asked, rubbing all of her secretions in his face. She wondered how it tasted. Salty, for sure.

Niki leaned forward, taking one last scoop of partially melted ice cream before setting it to the side on the towel. Wow, the heat felt great. The sun, the way the waves lined up, it all just filled her with elation.

So when she leaned her face down to his groin, it made her all the happier to see that Rinne was hard. He liked getting humiliated like this, didn’t he? Wow, what a masochist. When Niki tugged at the hem of his swim trunks, Rinne lifted his hips, allowing her to get them off quicker. Someone was excited. Well, a large glob of lube, a finger made its way to the entrance of his hole. She felt Rinne hesitate on her clit as she pushed in, a loud groan echoing through the rock cliffs.

He was so soft inside. He always was. It was like his ass was made for pleasure, made for this lovely squeeze, caressing her fingers in an absolutely perfect massage. He was always so loose, too, she supposed that’s what being a cock-whore did to someone.

Hm, well, speaking of cock, his dick was right there. He was pretty hard. Would be a shame if someone were to maybe…suck it?

In a moment, her lips were around the tip.

“Haarhrhah! Nik—Niki!” she heard, Rinne tilting his head off her ass.

Retaliating, she sat back down, crushing his head hard into the towel.

God, it was too much at once. With the two fingers pounding his ass, the suffocating aroma on his face, and now the condensing suction on his tip. He was going to cum, he was going to cum—

Niki gripped the bottom of his shaft hard, not letting a drop out.

“You’re supposed to get me off, first, asshole,” she said, her glare enough to kill a man.

Fuck, fuck, thoughts poured through Rinne’s mind as he licked her clit as fast as he could, desperately trying to get her off, trying to get himself off, he was too hard, too overwhelmed.

Rinne felt Niki convulse above him, her hole tightening up, clenching around pure nothing as she came on his face. Noises spewed out of her mouth as she couldn’t control herself, everything coming all at once.

And that’s when Niki finally let go of his dick.

Like the grossest milkshake in the world, Niki kept sucking.

Popping her head off in a moment, she gave off a sigh of relief, as if she had a nice big sip of coffee, drinking all the semen up like a fat noodle.

Niki unplugged her fingers from his ass and Rinne shoved her off, letting her laugh as she rolled off the towel and into the sand.

“That was fun,” she said, still unable to hold her laugh.

“Bitch! You got sand up my ass!” Rinne shouted, making a motion in the air to slap her, obviously missing.

“Your fault for being such an anal fiend,” she said, the heat of the sand proving to be very relaxing. Ooh, she was right next to the lunch box. Time for a sandwich.

“Can I get my ice cream now?” Rinne asked, like a petulant child.

“Yeah, go ahead,” she said, diving right into the lunch box.

Rinne picked up the abandoned tub of Ben & Jerry’s only to realize.

“It’s fucking melted!” Rinne shouted.

“Well, suck faster next time,” Niki said, taking a big bite of her sandwich.

“Well, maybe if someone ate better, her fucking cunt wouldn’t taste like that fucking sourdough starter you keep around the apartment,” Rinne said, snapping.

“Hey, you love my pussy, don’t joke with me,” she said, right back.

Rinne grimaced, embarrassed, knowing she was right.

Pouting, Rinne forced the spoon into the chocolate wonder, scooping it up and landing it right in his mouth. It wasn’t all melted.

Yup, ice cream was good. Ice cream was always good.

[shima-draws]

Hi hello I’m here with (half of) another ridiculously complex crossover AU here we go

Legally Blonde AU where Izuku is a semi-famous actor working part time in his father (Toshinori’s) studio while also going to college and majoring in Theatrical Production. His childhood friend and longtime boyfriend, Bakugou, has been dropping hints for the past few weeks about proposing to Izuku. Izuku, naturally, is absolutely thrilled, and has all the support of his friends and peers.

On the night of their big date, Bakugou breaks up with Izuku, saying that he's not "serious" enough for him, and that he only follows the path that was laid out for him and isn't ambitious enough to suit Bakugou's tastes in a lifelong partner. Bakugou tells Izuku he's going to UA, a famous law school that pumps out graduates that support professional heroes. Izuku is totally devastated, and shuts himself up in his room for weeks, becoming depressed.

After a pep talk from his friends, who are part of the production crew with him (Ashido, Hagakure, and Nejire), Izuku decides that he'll chase Bakugou to UA, and with Tsuyu's help, promptly starts studying for it. After making the cut, Izuku yells at Ashido for sending in a production video of him on set as his personal essay--because that shouldn't count!! Izuku hurriedly calls the admissions office and as they prepare to reject him, he gives an honest speech about love and how important it is for a lawyer to be compassionate and hardworking. He gets accepted!

On the first day of class Izuku bumps into a couple of already accomplished law students--Shinsou, who is extremely hardworking and ambitious despite his background, and Hatsume, a girl who's won tons of awards for her groundbreaking inventions and their contributions to hero society. With them is Todoroki, a recent graduate working as a teacher aid/intern under the infamous Aizawa, one of the most legendary lawyers in their era despite his tendency to only take certain cases for underground heroes. Izuku makes a stumbling, awkward yet somewhat eccentric introduction, and Todoroki is immediately smitten despite sensing that Izuku probably isn't cut out for UA.

Izuku bumps into Bakugou before their first class, and pretends that he forgot that Bakugou also attends UA. In their first class Aizawa ruthlessly weeds out the weaker students and intimidates the hell out of them by quizzing them with difficult cases. Aizawa tells them that he has a very big internship every year that accepts four students--and they're practically guaranteed a job after graduation. Izuku is called out for not having done the reading before class, and Yaoyorozu, an upper class, somewhat prissy girl, suggests that he be kicked out of the lecture hall.

Todoroki sneaks out during the lecture and comforts Izuku, saying that he'd been kicked out of class before too, and suggesting that Izuku study properly so he can be prepared next time. Yaoyorozu comes out next and Izuku confronts her about what she'd said, and she truthfully states that he has no place at UA if he's not willing to dedicate himself to it fully--that everyone else had gotten there through hard work and WANTED to be there, seeming to know that Izuku had made it in with different intentions. She idly wonders if Izuku's even capable of studying with that fluffy head of his (it's not meant to be an overly rude comment but Izuku takes it that way). Izuku's heart shatters when he realizes that Bakugou and Yaoyorozu are dating, because apparently they’d interned together before over the summer and Bakugou had been impressed by her intelligence and ambition. Izuku is encouraged by an imaginary production crew of his friends. Izuku decides if he's going to be serious he needs to start off by shaving his head LOL because according to Yaomomo it's the scruffy hair that's one of the big obstacles of winning Bakugou back.

Izuku swings by a salon and meets Uraraka--who immediately discourages him from getting a buzzcut, saying "Those fluffy locks of yours are a godsend and you should NOT sacrifice them to look like a military trainee. Trust me." Uraraka gives him a huge pep talk while also sharing her past failed romances, wishing she can find an athletic guy to be happy with, and encourages Izuku to go after love while he still has the chance, as himself. After that, Yaomomo happens to walk in with Jirou, and the two of them discuss a party they're going to at the end of the week. Izuku shyly asks if he can come. Jirou whispers to Yaomomo to tell him it's a costume party, which she does. Uraraka excitedly says she has the perfect thing for Izuku to wear.

At the party, everyone is dressed business casual. Izuku comes in wearing a slutty bunny outfit and is immediately humiliated. (Yaomomo feels kinda bad esp since she didn't really think he'd dress up--and definitely not like THIS.) Izuku steels his nerves and flirts with Bakugou, who is like "Why the hell didn't you wear this kinda shit while we were dating" and Izuku slyly says, "Well, you never asked, did you?" Bakugou reminisces a bit on their childhood and Izuku says they can go back to the way things were. Bakugou calls him out for saying so, especially given how he looks right now, and at this rate he'll be lucky to even make it through the semester, let alone get Aizawa's internship, which Izuku apparently wants to do despite not having any real conviction. Yaomomo steps in and Izuku snaps at her for the false costume party tip. Yaomomo suggests he leaves before he embarrasses himself further and brings shame to their class. Izuku says his costume was inspired by Usagiyama, a famous hero, and asks if she's an embarrassment too? The whole party gangs up on Yaomomo as Izuku leaves in tears.

Todoroki finds him on a bench outside wearing a very suggestive costume, freezing his ass off, miserable, and crying. Todoroki asks him why he came to UA in the first place--and Izuku reveals his full story with Bakugou. Todoroki lends Izuku his sweatshirt and says he can't feel sorry for him because he'd grown up in worse circumstances--his mother left his father when he was young, leading them to a life of near poverty, and that he's been struggling to support them both. His goal is to become a successful lawyer that can support honest heroes, and buy a house that his mother can live in comfortably. And, most importantly--win a case against his father to protect the both of them for good. Izuku thinks that's very sweet--but it kind of seems like Todoroki has a chip on his shoulder...and Todoroki says he does, and that he's going to take advantage of every opportunity he's given and work as hard as hell to become successful, and not just for himself. He's had to work two jobs on top of having class just to make it this far. Izuku asks how he does it--Todoroki tells him that he works nonstop and doesn't take the time to break, have parties, or spend hours distracting himself with films or theatrical productions. (Izuku feels a bit guilty at this LMAO) Izuku asks if Todoroki's willing to help him out--and Todoroki, strangely enough, agrees to do so.

Todoroki escorts Izuku back to his dorm, and notices that Izuku has barely touched his law books. Izuku admits it's been hard for him to really get into it, because coming from a theater/film background means that all of his studies are practical and on hand, and not from a book. Todoroki says he needs to get over that--and starts throwing out all of Izuku's posters and theater memorabilia. Izuku FREAKS LOL and Todoroki's like "You need to remove all distractions if you want to do this right".

I will write the rest tomorrow if enough of ya’ll wanna read the rest...LOL SORRY I’m so wiped out I gotta go to bed but anyway yes. Fun AU idea. I’m a slut for Tododeku crossovers apparently, ESPECIALLY this one because Elle and Emmett’s romance? Soft AND God Tier

[benisalilbitch]

Hello :D I am sending you two witcher characters to rate. So drum roll ......Detlaff annnnnd Regis. Thank you and I really like reading your blog.

Thank you so much!! I'm glad you like my humble lil blog.

Also, finally, finally, I will rate Dettlaff and Regis. I'm sorry to that first anon that I took way too long, but I needed to know more about my boys and I just love them! So here they are, the hottest vampires of all Toussaint!

Dettlaff van der Eretein

Hot, feral vampire boy? Fuck yeah I would bang this hot fucker. 15/10

When I started this ask game, I didn't understand why people wanted me to rate Dettlaff so much since he clearly was kind of monster-looking... Which I wasn't complaining at all, he still looked very hot while being all feral. But then I finally saw him like he really was and oh boy. My heart just couldn't take it. Watching Dettlaff being so hot, gorgeous and unbothered took my whore ass back to my Twilight days where I was thirsting after edgy vampire boys.

I do have a thing for deep voices and angry looking dark (also ginger bc of my bae Olgierd) haired men and then you add the fact that this fucker is a vampire? It marks all my boxes twice. Dettlaff has this dark aura around him that makes him one hot mf and my slutty ass cannot take it. How did Geralt tried to fight him the first time he met him instead of straight up fucking this guy? I have absolutely no idea, even more since Geralt is a thot himself and fucks everything and everyone.

Dettlaff is definitely into some kinky shit. If you thought being a vampire was kinky enough, you clearly haven't fucked with this guy... Neither have I, tbh but I'm more than willing to find out. They have a sexdungeon and regenerational habilities, of fucking course they put them to good use, you can bet your whore ass on that. Unlike Emhyr, Dettlaff gives me soft dom vibes. My boy is clearly very emotional, loving and tender and I just know I'll be in good hands with my hot vampire man.

Dettlaff is also one of the hottest names I've heard and yes, I also have a thing for names. You think I wanna be saying some boring guy's name like Bob, Kyle, Geralt or Josh while getting fucked? Absolutely fucking not. We stan hot men with hot names in this house. I plan on taking care of my best vampire boy once this is done because what was done to him was so fucking unfair and I will kill anyone who hurts my baby again with my own bare hands. I haven't finished the DLC yet, but I can only say we go by "bros before hoes" in this house, so you get the idea of what ending I might get.

Dettlaff can take me to prom and kiss my neck when I ask him to turn me into a vampire anytime... Provided that he actually shows me some of that kinky shit he's into right after. (Twilight reference lmao look it up)

Emiel Regis Rohellec Terzieff-Godefroy

Smart and poetic is definitely the new sexy. I will bang my hot romantic vampire boy anytime. 13/10

I will slam Regis a bit because I make fun of people I like (Geralt), so just know this is tough love. But first let's talk about his whole "hot guy with that hasn't slept in 3 days and only smokes cigs for meals" aesthetic because I'm definitely digging it. His hair gives me strong Edward Cullen vibes and holy shit do I wanna touch that hair.

I just die whenever Regis clutches his cute bag because that is so adorable, like; boy, you're a hot ass mf vampire. How the fuck do you look so fucking cute and precious? I love him. Also, he's very well mannered and a total gentleman, I'm sure. I'd definitely love to take Regis to a nice dinner, as long as he shows me the sex dungeon he has with Detlaff afterwards

What makes Regis so fucking hot and attractive is his mind. My boy just has a way with words that you just won't be able to refuse whatever he asks. The way he speaks and talks about things? Edward Cullen's edgy ass wishes he could. Regis is such a romantic and holy fuck isn't it hot when he teases Geralt and mocks him a bit? We just love sarcastic men that don't fear witchers and make fun of their insecurities.

His way of talking is definitely his strong suit and he knows it. Regis only needs to say a few lovely words and I'd be down on my knees in a minute.

Send me The Witcher 3 characters and I'll rate them along with my thot thoughts.

[tiffgeorgina]

alright trailer thoughts

watch it here slutties: https://twitter.com/SHOBlackMonday/status/1216778009044291585

1) HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT’S HERE THIS FEELS SURREAL

2) HOLYYY SHITTTT

3) but actually let’s get it. this song bangs showtime stays on their excellent editing.

4) trying to analyze showtime’s trailers is like trying to grab smoke so this is going to be extremely barebones for a while. 

5) somebody drives off with the busted up limbo, but we can’t tell who it is yet bc their face never comes into view. they’re wearing a gray suit tho, so it may become more obvious who it is once the episode itself is out.

6) mo is being dramatic asf which as of 1x10 is perfectly in character lmfao

7) bro what the FUCK did you do to your hair i gotta ask fuck the 80s. also there’s this character on IMDb tagged “Vanessa (hair like mo)” so that makes more sense now maybe?

8) establishing shots that almost make me think mo is hiding out in california. since we know his orphanage story is bullshit, maybe he’s visiting family? maybe this is where that marcus wainright iii character comes in? since i dont think he’s in the trailer?

9) keith is living. almost has out-of-the-closet energy. i bet that scene of him roller skating is either after a) he comes out to his wife and divorces her or b) he gets a call from mo and flies straight out to cali to meet up with him.

10) the editing is so good you guys holy shit they jsut never quit over there do they?

11) a shot of mo in some suburb. could be a family member or a friend’s house? which again leads me to think he’s in california.

12) there’s this TV show called “America’s Most Unsolved Crimes” that mo shows up on bc he’s being solely blamed for the crash. how dawn and blair managed to avoid any blame whatsoever is beyond me, but mo is an excellent scapegoat since he confessed on record. no idea who the guy sitting on the desk talking about him is tho, since he wasn’t announced as one of the new guest stars. probably just a one off. maybe this is where “reenactment dawn” comes in from the IMDb page?

13) mo is bringing back the 70s and i do not like it. when i said the 80s were cool bc nobody knew how to dress themselves This Is Not What I Meant.

14) he wouldn’t just casually play basketball with some random kids, these are probably either his cousins or his nephews or the kids of a friend. again leads me to believe he’s in california, possibly visiting marcus? it would make sense. either that or we finally get some real concrete background on mo that isn’t total bullshit.

15) keith is in contact with mo. it’s hard to tell if keith went to cali to see mo or if mo came to NY seeing as both are extremely suspicious. assuming mo is in cali that is. keith is definitely going to get mo back in the game. speaking of mo, this entire first 30 seconds is Mo-centric, so i bet mo’s arc is going to be plottier than blair or dawn’s in 1“A” (showtime doesn’t really have A and B arcs for this show bc there’s no midseason hiatus i just like the terminology)

16) throwback thursday lmfao

17) no idea who this guy shooting/probably fake shooting is?? like no idea. could be nothing of importance and just a transition filler/tone setting moment.

18) the heat is on motherfucker! let’s get this cat and mouse shit im ready for it!

19) here we go here’s dawn. back at the jammer group. back at DAWN AS THE PRESIDENT HIRING A BUNCH OF WOMEN???????? BIIIIIITTTTCCCCHHHH I LOVE TO SEE IT. INCLUDING DEANNA CHENG (she’s friends with casey which means she’s friends with half the cast we should’ve known she wasn’t going anywhere) AKA THE SALES CLERK WHO HARASSED DAWN IN 1X02????? YES BITHC

20) then wayne and yassir fucking it up (nice facial hair wayne it’s hideous kjsfkjdhg) and the women throwing paper at him??? LKJRHGKLJSERH????

21) blair and tiff dressed up??? guys. they’re going to some rich people gala thing. this is what i was talkinf about. im almost certain this is how blair and harris meet. their wives are gonna see each other after not having spoken in years bc of whatever but they used to be friends so they go to talk and the husbands and dragged along and *closet case to closet case communication sounds*

22) ok now BLAIR’S on the exercise craze? i thought that was just gonna be dawn like in s1 also how long is this exercise montage in the show bc there are some things a god fearing lesbian shouldn’t have to see. this weird mirror talking shit feels like voyeurism from this perspective i feel like i shouldn’t be seeing this.

23) she’s still topping him??? after all that??? aight yk it’s part of the dynamic

24) tiff is wearing the same dress in “you do, hunk” as she is in the bit where they get out of the limo and deal with the paparazzi so i presume that workout scene is immediately before that gala thing im establishing a #timeline

25) the skants reveal??? we call that PLOT DEVELOPMENT i love a good callback to the first season

26) the shocked gasp i can’t tell if it’s good or bad. also does this mean tiff’s starting her own company? since georgina is liquid?

27) larry telling dawn that mo’s on his way back for revenge? spliced with mo staring at the wall like he so frequently does while smoking? mayhaps this editing went off also i never thought i’d say this but the brotherfucker has a point mo is gonna pop off when he sees yall again

28) FBI wyd........ that’s a lot

29) that falling out last season bit: blair’s definitely talking about tiff’s parents, and im almost certain andrew flubbed right there and improvised over it by saying “autumn.” well im appreciative of that bc a) it’s funny and b) it indicates when this is going on a bit. it’s not like we’re two years in the future or anything. this is probably gonna start a couple of months after the crash and that’s it.

30) no idea who blair is talking to tho since i can’t see the woman’s face. could be one of tiff’s friends? idk. also nice hair tiff

31) that ball spinning around like a gumball in a machine? weird transition but aight. also immediately after, dawn is in the lehman office, again no idea why. probably the same scene as larry telling her that mo is plotting his revenge but idk why she’s there.

32) that shot of a plane coming into JFK? now im near certain that mo is in cali it would make so much sense please showtime just MAKE SENSE. 

33) confetti and mo’s entrance? you know what it’s what i should’ve expected tbh it’s all so delightfully in character EDIT: THE CONFETTI IS NOT BEFORE MO’S ENTRANCE. YOU CAN SEE DAWN’S CLOTHES CHANGE COLOR, IT WAS JUST AN EDITING TRICK.

34) mo’s just gonna pull up, zero fucks, in the middle of the day. much different than how i thought this scene would go, with a lot of betrayal and drama involved instead of this bitch just pulling up. now idek if dawn and mo are in contact before this, when before i was almost certain they would be.

35) what blair says here is definitely not the first thing he says when mo walks in, i can tell from the editing. also im near certain that blair doesn’t say “bro.” it sounds edited in/done in post (his voice pitches up a lot there when that’s usually a beat when your voice would fall), so i wouldn’t be surprised if blair curses a lot there and they just had to edit it to stay in the green band. 

36) ol polluted waterfall lookin ass jshgkjfdhg mo quit lying that hairstyle is not popular fuck off

37) im loving this tagging order tbh. paul scheer getting tagged in the trailer is just. what he deserves. do we consider keith a protagonist now? he’s in all the promo material by name and face now.

38) regina and andrew look so good god yes also the editing is so GOOD fuck

39) keith (hand holding emoji) blair

        getting hit by random vehicles

40) NO THE LIMBO FUCK SHIT THESE CARS WERE NOT MEANT TO LAST almost looks deliberate :eyes emoji:

41) what’s keith doing with this barbershop quartet wtf

42) almost certain that’s tiff singing? based on 1x09 this oughta be good lmao

43) THE HEEL CLICKING IS TAKING ME OUT HGKJDHFGKJFD. could this be mo and marcus? who knows?

44) look at all the cash wtf what’s all that cash for? ah shit here we go again

45) tiff entering another dimension followed by dawn doing what is certainly a mountain of coke? kind of poetic cinema ok

46) ok dawn’s wearing that green suit again from my icon so??? what does it mean what does it all mean

47) who is mo squaring up with tf? is this marcus? i can’t tell in this lighting maybe it’s fake shooting guy idk also where the fuck are they? some party? but not a rich ppl thing just a thing? idk

48) guys. we have it. the fucking airdate. i have been stanning since the first fucking episode almost a year ago today and finally we have an airdate. respect to the new stans but yall dont know what seven and a half months of network radio silence in regards to your current obsession feels like. @hatimbinaba msged me and said we had a date and the shot of adrenaline i felt was like nothing else. serotonin is currently stored in the black monday and now the serotonin is stored in the ME. Sunday, March 15, 2020, 10 pm motherfuckers. put that shit on the calendar. also looks like we have a slightly earlier timeslot which is nice.

49) and to top (ahah) it all off we have blair just straight up gay panicking at the end. that’s definitely tuc and june and if yall have been following yall would know that tuc is playing blair’s love interest and june is playing tuc’s wife so this is all very jghsrkjghs im rly excited for this scene. no way of knowing if this is before or after blair and harris get together but it’s still kshgkdjhgdkj. rich people golfing? more like rich people existing lmao. also where’s that onion video i need to find the onion video fuck this is just like the onion said would happen. i will post it and make memes later. 

50) then blair just gets hit??? by the golfcart?? and there’s this scream that is definitely not the scream of andrew, tuc or june so??? whose scream was that??? did they add that shit in post??? tf???? also tuc and june barely flinching is really decapitating me kjshkrjdg

51) there’s no way of knowing if tiff is also at the golf course, but if she isn’t? then it’s just blair and his canon love interest and canon love interest’s wife???? which is so funny “hey come play golf with me” “oh is anyone else coming?” “ya my wife” “you’re so stupid i have to question how you’re even still alive”

52) WHEEWWWW AND THAT’S IT YALL!!! BUT A COUPLE MORE THINGS. some distinct absences: no known shot of marcus (which is wack yall would think they would want to plug the hell out of dulé hill) and very few shots of harris and corky. why. promote your newcomers some more tf.

anyways that’s all on this long ass post. @ mutuals expect more freakouts xx love yall this is unedited just raw emotion

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #207

“it’s late, and you’re still staring at the light; to call it an addiction’s impolite.”

Nevermind what gender you ARE, what gender do you WANT to be? Happy being a girl. Do you ever feel ashamed revealing your age? When it's to people who are aware of how behind I am in the adult world in any context, yes. Very. If they know nothing about me, then I don't care. Are you confident enough to reveal your height and weight? Height, I don't care. Weight, fuck no. What do your parents call you? Both usually say "Britt," but Dad's more likely to use terms of endearment like "sweetie" and such. Well, Mom does use "hunny" a lot too. How old were you when you first got to go on the computer? Idr. About the "normal" age for little kids that played Neopets, probably. Would you say you’re an emotional person? Way too emotional. What’s a color that suits you the best? Black. And a color you just can’t pull off/don’t want to? Probably most... I wouldn't know, almost every single thing I wear is black. I have literally one light purple shirt, and I think that's the only non-black shirt I own. Describe yourself when you were 6 years old? Very talkative, extremely imaginative, outgoing, I was definitely weird, tomboyish, very happy... Man, I miss being that kid sometimes. A type of personality you just can't stand? The older and older I get, the more I cannot STAND a closed mind. I like people who accept they're far from always right, and sometimes, your "right" isn't such for someone else, and that is fine. You don't have to see the same way to still get along perfectly (though of course, there's no need to respect an opinion that spits upon, invalidates, or is just plain hateful towards another person/group). Like just as an example 'cuz I feel like I explained that poorly; I'm really not into the idea of polygamy at all, but I'm not against it for people it works with. You do you. Your appearance in one word would be? "Abilify." :^) City type of person or country? I like the live in a more country-ish area, but I found through Chicago I LOVE /visiting/ cities. What’s something you’re obsessed about right now? When am I not obsessed with Mark, meerkats, Silent Hill, opossums (a newer addition), WoW, etc. etc.? My whole life runs on obsessing over something, fren. Your reaction if someone told you you look 10 years older than your age? ZOINKS that would suck ass. Do you really badly want anything right now? For the past couple weeks, I've become more and more antsy to get up to Sara's again. When I land a job, fancyin' up my tattoo just because as I've said again and again it is SO important to me and must be perfect, then I'm saving up to go back up there. What’s something that makes you really stressed out? With all this job searching and such going on, it's like all I can think about, so why not mention what fucked me up at my previous ones: Putting me in a position of responsibility and expected knowledge. Ex., when I was a sales associate and was asked "Oh, do you have this?"/"Where is this?", it was CONSTANT PANIC MODE because I never knew and had to ask somebody, when I was expected to be a knowledgeable employee to the customer, and then comes the horror of feeling like I'm inconveniencing and annoying them. Have any particular standard look you look for in a significant other? I don't have a "standard look," no, but I am more likely to be drawn to a gothic appearance. But I don't actively search for someone that meets that criteria or anything. Do you listen to Wiz Khalifa? No. What are your opinions on marijuana legalization? Please legalize medicinal use already. Recreationally, idk. Do you date outside your own race? I'd have no reservations against it. I dated a Hispanic... less than a day, but still, you get the point that I don't have a problem with it. What are some of your turn-offs? SEXIST/MISOGYNISTIC, too old-fashioned, racist and/or homophobic, raunchy, arrogant/self-centered, lack of sincere interest and enthusiasm in conversation, poor hygiene, I'm gonna get SHIT ON for saying "too slutty," not taking dating seriously... that kinda stuff. I'm so picky. Are you gay, straight, bi, or trans? Bisexual. Are you vegetarian? If not, would you ever consider becoming one? I'm not now, but I hope to return to it after I get to my goal weight... In my few months of vegetarianism, it was proven that my immense pickiness with food was making the diet unhealthy for me, as I was strongly lacking in certain vitamins and such. I'm going to have to somehow overcome that if I want to return to it, which I REALLY do want to do the more and more I get into animal welfare and care. Are you in love? Yes. Are you more of a pessimist or an optimist? Pessimist, I think, out of the two. But I like to see myself as a realist. How much money is in your wallet? Literally just $11 lmao. What’s your favorite sex position? Only experienced in these with a man, so answering with that in mind. I like sitting on his lap, facing him, with my legs around his back. What do you ultimately wish for in life? Happiness and peace. Have you ever been pregnant? No. What do you think about tipping at restaurants? Tip your goddamn waiter/waitress, assholes. I do believe in tipping based on the quality of service, BUT at least give them SOMETHING for working. Do you have your driver’s license? No jkajdsklfaj;wer. I haaaave to practice more. Whenever I'm in the car, I always strongly prefer to listen to my music, controlling it from the passenger's seat, and at least right now, I can't drive with loud music, barely any at all really, so I have a hard time giving up blaring my music while Mom drives lmao. Have you ever passed out from drinking? No. What’s your favorite carnival food? Idk, I don't go nearly enough. Who did you last kiss? Romantically, Sara. Platonically, either my niece or nephew when leaving. Have you seen the final Harry Potter movie? I haven't even see one. Ever been called a slut? No. Would you ever have sex with someone not of your preferred sex? I'm bisexual so like- Would you ever get back together with any of your exes? No. Do you take any meds on a daily basis? Yep. What did you do today? Watched LPs as always; did some job searching; played WoW, way shorter than usual though; took a nap; made a new icon; took a shower; listened to music; did some social media scrolling. The usual stuff. What do you wear to bed at home? A tank top and pj pants. What do you wear to bed when you're somewhere else? The same, but with a bra. Is there a place you keep any prized/secret things whilst you’re away? No. Do you have any phobias? What? Why do you think you have this/them? I'll just talk about the unordinary ones, 'cuz I have a lot. The ones I'd consider "weird" are vomiting, whale sharks, and pregnancy. Vomiting is because it's just incredibly unpleasant, but also because I know what goes down is not supposed to come back up. Like no one likes puking, no shit, but I'm legit afraid of it and lock up on what to do when I feel it coming, like I don't know what to do. Whale sharks... ahaha. It literally came from World of Warcraft. The design of their mouths is fucking horrifying, and I hate hate hate how they sometimes phase in-and-out of the Vashj'ir map so just like pOP UP. NAH, SON. It's just their damn mouths, even though I know their esophagus is far too small to swallow a human. As for pregnancy, just... ew. I'm afraid of parasites, and it's a parasitic relationship. Something should NOT be growing inside of you. What skill do you possess that you are most proud of? I'm very compassionate, especially when it comes to others enduring emotional struggles. I really feel for hurting people. What is your greatest strength (e.g. honest, loyal, brave)? I have strong morals and stick to them. I'll always stand up for what I feel is right. What’s your greatest shortcoming or flaw (e.g. cowardly, alcoholic)? Ah jeez, there's a lot... but probably my anxiety. It's held me back and manipulated my actions since middle school. I struggle not followings its rules, but I'm sure trying. Who do you most admire? Mark, my mom, Sara, Sara's dad, Steve Irwin... man, there's too many great people. Who do you most love? Sara, my mom, and my pets, Teddy especially. What three things do you look for most in a partner? EXPRESSING OF THEIR EMOTIONS/TRULY FEELING!!!!!!!!, compassion, and a cool head. If you could ask God (to atheists - IF there was one) one question, what? Hm. Good question... There's a lot, but mostly little wonders; I feel like I have a decent understanding of the god I personally see, so don't have any magnificent questions. Perhaps regarding why they created our world. That'd be interesting. Rate yourself on these traits from 0 to 10: 0 - do not possess this trait. 10 - you have great amounts of this trait. Calm temper: 7. Charm: *big shrug* Cheerfulness: 3-4. Confidence: 0-3. Courtesy: 8-10. Curiosity: 6-10. Forgiveness: 9-10. Generosity: 8-10. Greed: 0-3. Helpfulness: Well, I like to try to help, but I don't feel I'm very successful at that, so idk. Honesty: 5-9, depending on who I'm talking to and what the subject is, I guess. Loyalty: This is very flexible, and I don't feel like I can put a number on it. It depends on how deserving you are of the trait, and yes, you can lose my loyalty in a heartbeat if you give me reason to take it away. Optimism: 0-4. Patience: This can go from a whopping 0 to a 10, lmao. Very dependent on the situation. Self-sacrifice: 8-9. Wit: -10. Briefly describe your family. Kinda broken. Tight bonds scattered between certain people, no bonds with others. What is the worst thing that has ever happened to you? The breakup. I wouldn't wish that night upon Satan himself. How did it affect you? We know. Have you ever had any recurring nightmares or themes in nightmares? Speaking of that... Jason is in most nightmares I remember. The common theme is it's either after the breakup and we have an awkward running in with each other, or it's long before when everything was "perfect." All things considered, I'd call even that a nightmare. Those fuck with me the most. Do you currently have a boyfriend/girlfriend? Yeah. Do you have any close friends? I can count those on maybe two fingers. Of what are you most proud? Letting Jason go. Of what are you most ashamed? I've talked about the Joel situation multiple times. What is your religion? Theist. Where do you stand on abortion? Mostly pro-choice. Where do you stand on the death penalty? Sometimes justifiable and one's deserving end. Felons are lucky enough it's done humanely. Where do you stand on wearing fur? If you're not surviving out in the arctic, fuck you and all you stand for. Could you kill somebody? I'm perfectly aware I could in defense situations. For what reason would you kill somebody? Defending myself or loved ones. Hell, probably even strangers. I'd kill a rapist with zero fucking hesitation, even if they were assaulting someone I'd never seen before. Would you SERIOUSLY CONSIDER killing anybody right now? No. Do you trust easily, or not? NOPE. What, if anything, would you sacrifice your life for? Defending peace, gay rights, or if it was to protect most of those I love. What are your dreams/ambitions/goals? Be a successful photographer, reach financial stability, come to a point where I'm actually proud of what I've done, play a roll in wildlife conservation, be happily married, and just overall be content and satisfied with my life. How do you plan to reach them? Working my goddamn ass off and not taking "no" for an answer (not about the marriage part tho lmao). Do you ever want to have a family someday? With children? No. Who would you want to start this family with, or do you not yet know? I just want a pet family with Sara. What do you see yourself doing next year? Man, I don't have a clue... What do you see yourself doing in twenty years? I don't want to think of that. That's too far ahead. I'll be 43... I've gotta work on too many things now. Would you ever have an affair? I'm very curious as to who would actually answer "yes" to this. Would you ever have a one night stand? No. Lmaoooo actually this is sad as fuck, but I think I've said in a previous survey just knowing myself, if we were both single and clicked, I'd be doomed if it was Markiplier. My morals would sadly go out the window. If you had a month of nothing (no work, no obligations) what would you do? That's literally been the story of my life for years now, especially the past two. And it's torture. Would you ever choose a career or job where your life was at risk? No. Well, actually, I do want to do wildlife photography, and it can be pretty dangerous. Were you present at any major historical events (e.g. 9/11)? No. Do you have any famous relatives? No. Ancestors, yeah, but not close relatives. Are you a loyal member of any organizations? No. What type of criminal would you be? With how forgetful I am, I'm certain I'd be a very clumsy one that gets caught very quickly, lol. What are you listening to right now? "Voices" by Motionless In White. If you had to choose a stripper name, what would it be? Um idk. If your phone started ringing, who would you hope is calling? Someone for a job interview. Do you drink? Rarely and/or for some special occasions. Never enough to get drunk. Do you smoke? No. What is the first thing you notice in someone? I guess posture? How they carry themselves? Do you get attached easily? BOY! DO I!!!!!!!!!!! Do you like your eye color? I wish they were more blue. Would you go bungee jumping/sky diving if given the chance? Definitely not bungee jumping, I know how I react to that kind of up/down movement, and probably not skydiving, either. Have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist? Both regularly since middle school. Are looks important in a relationship? Not very. What is your favorite thing to do? Binge a new song I fell in love with for like days lmao. What was the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? PhotoScape. It's easier to move watermarks for photos on there, and I was working on the ones I took a few days back. Do you like to gossip? No, I feel super guilty. What kind of computer do you have? An Acer. Do you know all the words to your national anthem? I think? Have you ever failed a grade? No. Have you ever made the opposite sex cry? Yes. Have you ever had a crush on a teacher? Nah. Have you ever slapped someone in the face? No. Do you own a designer purse? Hell no. Waste of money for a goddamn purse that's just gonna get dirty and scratched. What’s the weirdest rumor you’ve ever heard about yourself? Jason and I magically had a baby over summer vacation when I was very obviously never pregnant. Do you say the "h" in the word “herb”? No, though I did for a super long time 'cuz I had no idea it was wrong. Do you speak any languages besides English? Not fluently. Can you run in high heels? I wouldn't really know, but boy do I doubt it. Do you have to take stairs or an elevator to get to your house? No. What do you usually order at Subway? Ummm I think white bread, ham, American cheese, bacon, jalapenos, banana peppers, and Chipotle sauce. I think that's it. Did an alarm wake you up this morning? No. How long is your mother’s hair? Past her shoulderblades, near the middle of her back. Is there any particular place you’d like to vacation to next? Surprisingly, I'd love to go somewhere tropical, like Hawaii or some shit like that. Somewhere with clear water and unique, beautiful wildlife and nature. What is your beer of choice, if any? Never tried beer, never want to. The smell is bad enough. That and I associate it with when Dad was an alcoholic. Did you share a bed with anyone last night? No. Well, other than with my cat. Do you know anyone who volunteers regularly? Yes. Have you ever ruined a nice pair of shoes, and how? Maybe, playing in puddles or biking through them and mud as a kid or something. Who were the last friends you went to hang out with? Sara. How many chairs are in the room you’re currently in? None. Have you texted a relative in the past week? Not besides immediate family. Are you doing anything important today? No. If I were to bring you any type of food right now, what would you pick? If I was actually hungry, I have been craving hotdogs on the grill like CRAZY lately. No clue why. When did you move into the house you’re currently living in? April-ish 2017. Do you ever sleep with the light on? No, I can't. Do you pray to Jesus? 20+ years of that did nothing. No. What was the last thing you ordered at Starbucks? N/A Do you have a bonfire pit in your yard? No. Would you consider being homeless if it meant you could travel the world? I don't know; there's lots of factors to consider. Would I be willing to leave my pets (but Teddy, probably; I'd want him with me) with my mom? Would I have something like a camper? Where am I getting this money to travel and provide for myself? Do you know your next-door neighbor? Mom knows one, but I personally don't. What’s something you have never done? Lots of things? As an example, uhhh... I've never done a cartwheel, despite childhood efforts? Name someone you know who is a true risk-taker, adventurer, and free spirit. Do you admire that person? Idk. Do you wish you were more of a free spirit? I think I already am, but it'd be cool to be more of one. Are you allergic to any medications? No. How do you feel when someone says something you’ve experienced doesn’t exist? Tell me depression isn't real, my PTSD isn't genuine, I can "get over" my anxiety if I want to hard enough, stuff like that, and I will not fucking associate with you. These are things that have massively affected my life; I dare someone to tell me these experiences aren't real issues. What worldview do you have? A realistic one, I think. I'm positive in some areas, negative in others. Hm... I'm probably more pessimistic about the world's future, though. Do you have friends who have different religious beliefs than you? Duh? If applicable, who was the first person you “came out” to? Sara. What’s one thing you’d like to do more? Travel. What was your style in high school? Some emo/metalhead hybrid that wished with all her heart to be capable of affording a goth wardrobe and bitch I still do. What’s one thing you are jealous that other people got to do but you didn’t? Have a healthy teenage experience. Have you ever taken birth control pills continuously? I have for years for my cycle. I had just about debilitating cramps and sometimes periods that lasted over a week. Who is your personality twin? Sara is probably the closest. What’s a common name that you hate? Edward, above all. Not a big fan of William, Robert, or Allen, either. Who do you wish you were best friends with? If you don't count my girlfriend as "best friend," maybeeee... Alon still? Or Baylee. I need to talk more to her, she's awesome. Do you own a camera tripod? Yes. Did you ever believe in mermaids? I don't believe so. …in fairies? I believed in the Tooth Fairy. …in Santa? Yes. Have you ever purchased alcohol? Yes. What is your newest hobby? Hm, I don't think I've found a new one for a long while... What gives your life meaning? I don't know. What motivates you to do what you do? The pursuit of happiness. What was the weather like the last time you went out? Too fucking hot. Do you go for walks often? No, though I really want to around a lake at a local, small park. Problems consist of no way to get there myself, it's WAY too fucking hot with my sweating issue, and my knees just wouldn't have it; I know I couldn't walk the full lap around it. Also expect some art installations around the path and probably the gazebo are PokeStops for Pokemon Go and really wish I could play it, so that's bait to do it lmao. What color shirt are you wearing? Pink. What is your favorite type of YouTube video to watch? It really depends on who I'm watching. Favorite on the face of the planet are Mark's ego projects, then my second fave are probably Shane's conspiracy videos, then I love let's plays. Do you need any new clothes right now? I seriously need more pants. And new bras. Do you collect anything? If so, what? Silent Hill merch and meerkat stuff. ^and if not, what would you like to collect? When I can buy shit myself, ya girl is gonna have way too much Markiplier merch. YouTuber stuff in general, actually. Too shy to ask for that kinda stuff now lol. Have you ever experienced a miracle? I don't think so. What was the last thing you ate? A burger. Do you ever eat food that’s intended for kids? ...? Like, baby food? No. Or maybe you mean shit like Lunchables? In cases like that, sometimes? What was the last stupid thing you did? Oh boy, who knows. Do you get embarrassed easily? You. Have. No. Idea. What are your top three names you like for a daughter? Alessandra, then uhhhh... I like Chloe and Adrian. Would you ever film a vlog of yourself giving birth? Hell no. I'd never wanna see it, I'd never want my hypothetical child to have to witness that, etc. Do you like getting caught in the rain? No. Wet clothes are no. Do you think your hair looks best straight, wavy, or curly? Straight, I guess? Though my hair does swoop to the right, so it's kinda a wave? What was the last craft project you completed? Oh, yeesh. I don't do crafts. The closest thing was I guess Sara's Valentine's Day gift for last year? Name 3 YouTubers you would like to meet in person: Markiplier is literally the only one that matters lmao and it's not "would like to meet in person," he will be forced to endure meeting me ok. Meeting Shane Dawson would be amazing, he's such a relatable sweetie, aaaaand #3 would probably be Rhett and/or Link, as similar to Mark, they deserve a tear-filled thanks as well as back-breaking hugs for seriously helping in keeping me alive through my suicidal year. I mean it when I say they genuinely helped me keep going. What color are your nails painted currently? They’re never painted. Do you use a pill box? No. List 3 people you know who were loving and then turned cold: Jason, Jason, and Jason. Have you ever felt threatened for your life? No. Which did you like better: high school or college? My college experience was horrid. High school had great memories, but of course negative ones, too. Which year of your life stands out to you as the most significant so far? 2017. …and why? It was my year of recovery from the breakup. What was the last store you shopped at? I went to Wal-Mart with Mom. I think that was the most recent, anyway. Do you have a favorite pharmacist? No. Do you have a favorite cashier at the grocery store? No. What’s something you discovered recently? I'm a Billie Eilish fan. What makes you more creative? Music. What’s the last magical thing you experienced? YO okay so when my brother and nephew were here, we went to the science museum and into a 360 VR-esque show about astronauts. I got SO nauseous and dizzy, but it was nevertheless extremely cool. What is the theme of your bedroom? It doesn't have a theme. Have you ever lived in a dorm? No. When was the last time you stepped outside of your comfort zone? Just tonight! I ordered at a drive-thru myself. Would you rather ride a camel or an elephant? An elephant! Do you want to lose weight? You have no fucking idea. Which insects scare you, if any? Lmao most. Especially rhinoceros beetles, big beetles in general honestly, cockroaches, earwigs, centipedes... like a lot okay. I like observing praying mantises, but I would probably have a fucking heart attack if one was on me. Do you think it’s silly to be afraid of a tiny insect? Well, yeah, though I get the likely survival reason, that being we know many are venomous, so we're naturally averse to them, especially if we don't recognize the type. Were you raised religious? Yes. Have you ever been abused? No, thankfully. Is there a coffee shop you like better than Starbucks? N/A If you could afford to get your hair professionally done, what would you get? Man, I have SO many color combination ideas. If I could get it done in the safest manageable way by a pro, I saw this look once with totally bleached/pure white hair that fades to blood-red tips, and BOY would I get that in a heartbeat. If you had a lot of money, do you think you would use it wisely? I hope so. I think so. The only thing I imagine myself being weak with are tattoos. Do you know any rich people who are very irresponsible? I don't think so... List five careers that you’d like to have: Meerkat biologist, paleontologist, artist, poet, something in wildlife conservation/protection. List five far-out things that you’d like to do before you die: Scuba-dive, I'd LIKE to ride a rollercoaster (far-out for me, trust me), but I know I never will, and uh... idk. Riding a motorcycle would be cool, but that's another thing I hiiighly doubt I'll do. What was your first imaginary friend’s name? I never had one. What was the name of the first pet that you loved? Chance, a cat my mom rescued. She was our very first family pet. She was absolutely incredible. Do you like to go barefoot? Unless I'm in a house, no. Do you like the same colors now that you did as a kid? Yeah. Do you have a YouTube channel? Yeah. Is there someone who stopped talking to you for no reason? Oh, who to begin with? Did you ever get called horrible names like whore, skank or bitch? "Bitch" more than once. Where did you sleep last night? My bed. Have you ever slow danced with anyone? With Jason, yeah. And I don't think so, but maybe Sara briefly? Have you ever cried in public? Yeah. What would you do if you were pregnant? I don't have a fucking clue. Do you like cuddling? With someone I love. Have you ever cried in school? Yes, but I think I kept it private. Who’s the last person to send you a message on Facebook? A woman whose wedding I'm shooting this Saturday. Have you ever witnessed someone else engaging in a sexual act? Just making out. Where did you get drunk last? N/A What’s your relationship with the last person you texted? She's my girlfriend. If someone went through your pictures, would they find a dirty one? No. How did you do on the last test you took? I haven't been in school for a long time. How come you’re not going out with the person you love? I am.

[simba-bonfamille-lyons]

✂👓♔

✂ How does your character usually style their hair?

Belle: a messy ponytail 90% of the time, it’s only down when she’s at home after having just showered, or occasionally a few other times. she hates it in her face, so it is always pulled back but a lot of times it is like a second day ponytail cuz she’ll just keep it in when she sleeps so there are always pieces kind of sticking out. belle’s hair is just past shoulder length.

Simba: a lil fro, not super long, maybe just like half an inch/inch off his head. he keeps it well trimmed and shaped tho and keeps a brush in his car that he’ll use before he gets out to go anywhere. keeps a nice clean-cut beard 90% of the time.

Toulouse: always clean shaven (doesn’t have much facial hair anyway lol, imagine...), his hair is perfectly coiffed at all times. that like messy, loose curls look. his hair isn’t long enough to pull back or anything but it’s definitely on the longer side. idk just picture eddie’s fancy hair and it’s like that. takes longer to style it than literally anyone else.

Attina: braids!! tina loves braids. her hair is always styled unless she’s just like running to the grocery store or hanging out at home on a sunday. either wears it in loose curls or up in some sort of fancy up do. usually in different braids: french braids, dutch braids, occasionally braided pigtails. i’d say it’s like a 50/50 on whether it’s down and curled or up and styled. does a LOT of half down/half up looks. i’d say it reaches her bra strap line, so bottom of shoulder blades?

Hercules: he does literally zero things to his hair.

Mei: leaves it down most of the time because she can’t be bothered. it is very Long, almost to her butt long. it’s pretty messy. has a nice natural wave to it, very thick so if she does throw it up, it’s just in a messy bun or pony tail. when she’s dancing or exercising it is back though. sometimes she will put it back in some fancier updos, usually for special occasions. 

Shock: her hair is always kind of ratty and greasy. i have a hc that she actually hasn’t cut it since she went into remission so it’s also very long. however, she can’t be bothered with it most days and just throws it up in a bun, so most people don’t even realize how long it is. probably doesn’t even know how to braid lol. 

Bob: he also does literally zero things to his hair, it’s pretty short, also balding. probably tried to do something about that at one point and it went Very Wrong. 

Thomas: actually does put some product in his hair. mostly because if he didn’t it would be super curly and stick out all over the place and he does care about his appearance somewhat. so he’ll kind of rub product on his hands and then run it through his hair, but that just leaves these like lovely defined curls in the wake.

Zira: shaved head. like a boss. occasionally will don a wig for fancy occasions, but her day to day is a shaved head or a very, very close cut fro.

Candace: usually down. sometimes she’ll put it in a ponytail, especially when she’s doing something Science-y (TM) but when she puts it up there are always a few hairs that frame her face. braids it occasionally if she’s feeling fancy. it’s also quite long, i’d say mid-back probably, maybe a little longer.

👓 What kind of mobility or assistive devices (if any) does your character use in daily life? (Glasses, canes, hearing aides, wheelchairs, etc.)

Belle: none! tho im thinking about giving her glasses for reading eventually mostly because i think that’s very ironic and also pregnancy can mess up your eyesight bc pregnancy is WACK y’all -- but just imagine the plot of belle not being able to read !!! 

Simba: none! he does have a knee that acts up on him tho and will probably need a cane in his older age (UGH IM SO OLD - simba) 

Toulouse: also considering giving toulouse glasses bc eddie also has very cute glasses and it’s a Look (TM). maybe i will say he has reading glasses, can i just retcon that lmao

Attina: none! 

Hercules: none!

Mei: none!

Shock: had to use a cane for a few months during her treatment, and has also been wheelchair-bound a few times. had to stop using the cane bc all she did was wack people with it and no one could get close to her. 

Bob: none! 

Thomas: none!

Zira: none, she’s a vampire lol

Candace: has glasses! she wears contacts usually bc glasses are for NERDS, but at night or if she’s been studying/reading/on the comp for a long time, she has to switch to glasses bc her eyes will get really fatigued otherwise. 

♔ How does your character usually dress for a fancy event?

Belle: i actually have a hc that all of belle’s fancier outfits come from her mom, because no way would she ever buy them herself. she also only has like 3 pairs of Fancy Shoes that she just rotates through. her color palette for events is like blue/gold generally. 

Simba: on theme -- unless he doesn’t want to be. but he always dresses...not flashy...but uhhhh eye-catching. loves to be the center of attention so his outfits are just wack-o. loves playing around with different looks. please do not test him he will literally wear anything. 

Toulouse: stuntin’ on all you bitches always. toulouse loves NOTHING more than he loves dressing up for fancy events. it is in his BLOOD. always crushes the theme. designer only. jewelry, make up, AMAZING shoes. honestly i wanna play around with different styles even more with him. i had him wear a skirt to pride and 10/10 will do that again idk he is just very fluid in his fashion choices and i should embrace that more. 

Attina: attina has a very modern-classic style. i always say hers is closest to what my own is in my head. lots of sweetheart necklines, long, flowing princess skirts/silhouettes. the girliest of my girls, she loves to look and feel very feminine. her color palette is generally a gold/red/green palette. LOTS of jewelry. bitch loves the sparkle.

Hercules: a suit.

Mei: i love mei’s event and fancy outfit style. it’s very girlish and flirty. doesn’t wear anything super body-hugging. loves tulle skirts. she loves wearing fun clothes but nothing too flashy. her style is kind of hard to describe, but generally pretty modern and not conservative, but definitely not sexy really. it can also be very witchy: lace, capes, shimmery things, etc.

Shock: can be explained by clicking here but seriously, shock only shops at thrift shops or what she can steal from people. so, her outfits are generally kind of all over the place. but she loves a grungy look, but when she dresses up she does like a Modern Flirty Grunge: sheer tops, lace, ripped up clothes, etc.

Bob: a suit.

Thomas: a suit. (sometimes fun colored pocket squares/tie/bow tie. will wear whatever phil puts him in.)

Zira: loves a pant suit. very modern silhouettes. always looking fly. lots of jewel tones: purples, greens, etc.  

Candace: i’m still getting a feel for her fashion and she hasn’t been to any events yet, so we’ll see! but probably very modern and tighter and kind of slutty, but like tasteful slutty. has nice legs so wants to show those off. 

[twistedblueformoflight]

   angel - what’s one character trait you like about yourself? my vainglory    doll - what’s your favourite outfit? ive been digging the ‘least popular member of the girl group’ outfit with the navy bomber jakcet    pumpkin - what’s your favourite weather and why? balmy summer breeze    baby - what makes you feel better when you’re down? cleaning and cooking!    sugarpie - what’s your favourite sweet treat? ssssssssour skittles baby    kitten - are you a dog person or a cat person? cat!    princess - if you could live in any other time period, which would it be? if i had been born in the like 1500s i feel like i would’ve been an apothecary and grown my hair out long and wore little glasses on a string and had a live-in assistant who i had a madly passionate affair of touches and murmurs with until we get pilloried and killed for being jewish    peach - what’s your ideal aesthetic? slutty drab conspiracy theorist    darling -  what romantic gesture makes you feel the most loved? thoughtfulness! people remembering things about me and keeping me in their mind    button - do you have a type? what is it like? thick defined filled in eyebrows and big bags under the eyes. androgynous. confident and charming with a mean streak. practically minded.    sweet pea - what’s your favourite flower? pansies    petal - what’s your favourite smell or perfume? juniper!    sunshine - what’s the nicest compliment you’ve ever gotten? elliott called me a svelte femme goddess last night lmao    baby girl - how do you like to be held? i like feeling arms around my waist! sometimes i have phantom feelings there and i think it’s a future love    lover - how do you show someone you like them? spending time with them and writing bad poetry about them    buttercup - what does/would your online dating bio say? jess helped me with my personal, she knows what it is    boo - what’s your dream date? i might’ve already had it? wandering around the arboretum. maybe there would’ve also been coffee?    cupcake - if you’re treating yourself, what do you do? buy clothes/books    wild thing - what’s something about you that surprises people? i’ve uhhhhhhhh........ sucked willy    bubba - tell me a funny story from your childhood. one time i decided to make a strawberry cake when my parents were out to surprise them and i was really tiny and had to climb up the shelves to reach the bag of flour? and i totally went for it but then fell out the cabinet with the bag of flour and it exploded on impact with the floor so my parents came back to a kitchen that had just been like powder bombed in flour and a sobbing little child    honey - what’s your favourite hot drink? coffee!    love bug - what song would you love to have sung to you? whatever they really connect to!    cutie - what’s your favourite fairytale? probebly......... 7 dancing princesses    dumpling - what’s your favourite movie right now? i don’t really watch movies.............. stoppppppppp........................    my love - what would your dream home be like? neat! organized! a big kitchen and a workspace and a backyard for little man and kinga! big windows    dear - pick whatever question you’d most like to answer! all of em

rose - describe your crush. do I have a crush right now? i dunno. sam is really sweet and it really feels like if we had met earlier there could’ve been something but it’s not like my life isn’t full of cute people cherry-blossom - do you believe in love at first sight? that’s infatuation daisy - what’s your best childhood memory? getting a bike! i pretended to be an unlockable character in a bike video game named Scarecrow and would zoom around the woods and the college campus daffodil - which colour suits you best? black and blue peony - do you put more value in honour or truth? truth! iris - favourite 90s song? BETTER OF ALONE sunflower - sun or moon? moon narcissus - your best physical feature? cheekbones freesia - are you still friends with the person you considered your best friend two years ago? yeah they’re eating an apple rn orchid - favourite fruit? apricots and blueberries violet - have you had your first kiss? regrettably gypsophila - do you prefer many distant friends, or a few close friends? both! its important to know a bunch of people but you can’t be super deep friends with all of them gerbera - neon or pastel? pastel but i do love translucent neon green carnation - does true love exist? i mean like..... in a sense i suppose alstroemeria - dream vacation? i really want to go to santiago in chile and go to a bunch of restaurants anemone - were you ever interested in greek mythology? sort of? not really honestly i just liked jason and the golden fleece cymbidium - sexuality? bi rhododendron - what’s your biggest fear? hurting people tulip - lucky number? 8 gladiolus - who do you look up to most? i look up to elliott’s reserves of strength and adaptability and professionality snapdragon - favourite mythical creature? kelpies hydrangea - proudest moment? adopting kinga!! my sweet creatch!! heather - what’s your favourite musical? fiddler on the roof, probably? i have a soft spot for how to succeed in business without really trying, too delphinium - what’s your star sign - does it suit you? Leo, it didn’t before i came out but i’m really owning it now, huh? ginger - least favourite food? canned tuna! blech