#and its getting more blatant as they hopefully get back into their groove

[kaibacorpintern]

hi i forgot the ship name but would u write something thats seto and ryou? (platonic or romantic) where they play a ttrpg together or somethin idk

“or somethin idk” give me an inch, i have run a mile. a mile of 4.7k words.

platonic euroshipping. post-canon. ryou applies for a game writer position at kaibacorp and makes it to the final stage. contains: dragons, swords, some very sexy things about solidvision and the virtual world, kaiba covered in blood and having a great time, me the writer having a great time, hopefully you the reader having a great time, and ryou, not covered in blood, having a very, very, very anxious time

tw for some fantasy violence

++++++

Ryou inhaled, taking a deep breath of: the fresh, sweet smell of grass, the coolness of river water, something dry and grey in the wind, slightly rotten - smoke? And sulfur. The grasses were filled with the restless susurrus of the wind, each blade quivering with anticipation. Above him, a hawk tilted in lazy, wide circles, tracking the hidden paths of its prey. He stood on a dusty path halfway up the long slope of a steep hillside, the farmlands of the valley behind him peeled back to reveal the burned, blackened devastation beneath. The village from this distance looked like the charcoal remains of a bonfire, the air still shimmering with heat. 

The sun itself was hot, making him sweat in the thick, coarse silk of his mage’s robe, every purple thread saturated with light and heat. Mopping sweat from his brow, Ryou opened his options menu, the holographic display falling open, in the guise of an illuminated manuscript, and hovering at waist-height in thin air, perfectly tilted for reading. The parchment was old and yellowed, almost velvet to the touch, the edges frayed with age, and he couldn’t resist the urge to smell it, leaning in cautiously to take an experimental whiff. Strong notes of dust, old ink, age; an undertone of knowledge, of the forbidden kind. 

He selected Player Appearance and the page turned, with weight and heft, to reveal another. Kaiba didn’t miss a beat. Ryou had no doubt if he knelt down to drink from the stream that flowed down the slope, folding in clear ribbons past the rocks, the water would run cold over his fingers until they pruned. And the magic effects?

He swallowed. It was not just the sun that was making him sweat.

He’d just changed into something more practical - a short-sleeved green tunic, a pair of white breeches, leather boots that had just a bit of bite to the fit, like the player had to wear them in - when a chime pealed out from six feet away, as though someone had rung an invisible bell. The air tore apart, in odd, geometric anguish, like a broken mirror twisting into itself - 

and there was Kaiba, standing in the knee-high grass in his customary black turtleneck and tight pants, frowning with his arms crossed.

“Hello,” Ryou said. “It’s so nice to see you again. Your technology is... this is amazing. The attention to detail is incredible. The player screen, with the parchment - it even smells like - ”

“What is this? Medieval?” Kaiba said, glancing around at his clothes, the distant village, taking no notice of his praise; Ryou bit his tongue in self-rebuke. As if buttering him up with compliments was going to help. 

“Western Europe. From the mid-11th century to the 12th. The age of knights and chivalry,” he said, deciding that maybe his best strategy was to simply be straightforward.

“I’m familiar with basic history, thank you. How... classic,” Kaiba said, in a tone that screamed disinterest, and Ryou’s heart began to plummet - already starting from behind? No, no, no, he reminded himself, straightening the slouch out of his shoulders. Yuugi had warned him about this. Kaiba was fantastically tough to impress, in general, and the Virtual World was his world, a realm he'd built with sweat and tears, and stolen back with blood. So he hand-picked every writer that wrote for Virtual World games, refusing to squander a single pixel on conventional nonsense and uninspired cliché. 

The last step - before he brought the axe down - was a short, playable demo, as proof of concept, written by the applicant and executed by the Virtual World team.

Ryou had come this far in the application process. Trust that, Yuugi said. And trust yourself.

Kaiba was looking at him, eyebrows arched with expectant curiosity.

“Er,” Ryou said. “Let’s get started, then. You’ll need to change.”

He pulled up the menu, revelling in the hovering parchment once more, and changed Kaiba’s appearance, like - like magic, the lines of Kaiba’s silhouette rippling like a sine wave from the bottom up, his modern-day clothing becoming a knee-length tunic of chainmail under a belted dark blue surcoat. Kaiba held still throughout the entire transformation, in smug admiration of the effect, his arms held out in a ballet dancer’s pose as chainmail draped down his shoulders to his wrists. 

In his right hand appeared, with a sharp, diamond flash of light, a long arming sword, the edge nicked with age and bloodspill. The hilt was black, with a sapphire gleaming in the pommel. A plain shield dropped onto his left forearm. 

He gave the sword an experimental spin, testing the heft with practiced ease, and slid it back into the leather scabbard on his belt.

“A knight, the charred, smoking remains of a village… I’m assuming I’m on a quest to kill a dragon?” he said, pushing back the hood of the chainmail so that it draped off his shoulders, and nodding up the slope to where the grasses tattered into rocky shale. 

“Yes, you can assume that,” Ryou said politely.

On cue, a child no more than twelve years old staggered up the dusty path from the village, her small torso heaving with breath, sweat and tears running in clean streaks down her soot-stained face. 

“Sir Knight,” she choked out. Flashing a look at Ryou that said cheap blow, but unable to deny his own fraternal instinct, Kaiba dropped to one knee and caught her, his hands swallowing her thin, shuddering shoulders. Playing along, at least.

“Calm down,” he said, steadying her. Ryou imagined his anxiety as a small, hard rock, packing in the twist of every fraying nerve, and leaned all his weight onto one foot, grinding the rock into the dirt with his heel. "What is it?”

“They sent me to warn you, about the dragon,” she panted. “They said only the Chosen One can truly defeat the dragon, and bring peace back to the land. Many have tried. All suffered the same terrible fate - a fate worse than death.”

“I see,” Kaiba said. “And who is the Chosen One?”

The girl glanced at Ryou over Kaiba’s shoulder, her eyes glinting with fear. 

“No - no one knows,” she said. “But all the oracles say they’re coming… a knight with a pure and worthy heart. Sir Knight, don’t go. Come back to the village. It’s safe there. What do you gain from this? Our humble lands aren’t worth the danger!”

“I think they are,” Kaiba said, thumbing soot off her face, and frowning as her cheek pixelated, briefly, and resumed a skin-like texture. "Open master commands, user ID 000002510. Initiate master log. Begin recording: skin-to-skin contact glitch reappeared during writer play-test, candidate Bakura, R. Begin patch work immediately. End recording. Disperse to Virtual World team, flag Sawada, project manager. Close master commands. Did you know, one of the most compelling unsolved problems in physics is the lack of a theory that realizes both general relativity and quantum mechanics?”

The girl gave him a wary look, wide-eyed with faint alarm. Ryou sucked in a breath, grinding the anxiety rock down, down, down.

“You - you speak in tongues, Sir Knight," she said. "Are you also an oracle? Has your future-sight failed you? Don’t you see that only death lives on the mountain?”

Kaiba snorted and stood up, turning to Ryou. “A solid response to non-standard player input. Doesn’t ignore modern concepts, but re-contextualizes them in the setting of this world via a framework of prophecy, and redirects the player to the plot.” 

“Um... thank you?” Ryou said. “I wanted this world to feel like it has a future, too, not just a history. I wanted to place it on a timeline, like it - ”

Kaiba’s attention swung back to the girl, still standing there with her eyes darting between them, full of bafflement. 

“Return to the village, girl. Tell them my future-sight never fails me.”

The girl retreated backwards, warily, twisted on her heel, and fled down the path.

"If I go down to the village, what'll I find?" Kaiba said.

"More information about the Chosen One, and an outlaw who tries to recruit you to her band of thieves, with the option to join them for a stealth-based quest.”

"Hm. You have the imagination and the decency to offer me something other than blatant bait, which I don't always bite. The cliché of the Chosen One is boring as hell, it’s both over-done and deterministic, but I think... yes. Yes, I'll bite. Let's go see your dragon."

In the wake of this... compliment?, Ryou could only offer him a small, tentative smile, his heart clenching tight around Yuugi's advice. 

Kaiba started up the path. 

“Er, Kaiba - you might want to check your inventory before you encounter the dragon."

Kaiba’s hand padded around his waist until he found the small satchel that sat on his hip. Another parchment unfurled in the air before him, listing its contents:

Two full healing spells;

Two glamour spells, for changing the guise of a person or object;

Two transformation spells, for changing a person or an object into an animal;

Two scrying spells, for locating people or objects;

Two ignis spells, for commanding fire;

Two aqua spells, for commanding water; and

Two ventus spells, for commanding wind.

Ryou watched him as he read. He'd carved a small, thick groove into the dirt below his foot. Surely, that was enough for Kaiba to get creative?

Kaiba only closed the parchment with a brisk flick of his hand. Then he started up the mountain, Ryou following nervously behind.

***

The mountain path was rougher than Ryou expected, a tightly-coiled spring of switchbacks, leading to the curved lip of a high pass. After several minutes of trudging the dust in silence, he was panting for breath, his feet aching and blistering in their boots, and deeply regretting adding this little detail to the story. Next time, he was just going to put the dragon on a rolling, grassy plain, and he’d make it like an American autumn corn maze, because it still needed to be a challenge, and when the players got to the center they’d find the dragon’s decaying, rotting corpse and realize they’d been stuck inside the maze for five hundred years and everyone they loved was dead, and if they wanted to go back to their own time they’d have to find out how to resurrect the dragon, but only at a terrible cost, a sacrifice of some kind... Not his best off-the-cuff work, but there were usable concepts in there, somewhere. If there was a next time.

Despite being laden down with the chainmail, each tiny link flashing like fish scales in the airy slanting of the afternoon sun, Kaiba seemed unaffected by the demands of the hike, propelling himself forward with long, energetic strides. How?

Ryou thought about asking for a break. Or drinking water from the stream. Or changing his boots for something comfier, but he didn't have anything else in his outfit inventory except the mage robes, and the slippers might be even worse… he stopped, hands on his hips, gathering his breath.

From here the valley sprawled below them, a wide, velvety plain, its edges rising and scalloped by mountains. The village fit in the circle of his thumb and forefinger, a smoking black thumbprint. The team had done a fantastic job: the stream ran down the mountain, flattened into a river, and ran south, lazy and serpentine, a green-blue ribbon cutting through the yellow plains, just like he’d outlined in his initial description of the world….

Wait. 

This was all virtual. 

There was no such thing as air, here, or rivers or sunshine or grasses.

His real, physical body was half-asleep in a Virtual World testing pod on the 17th floor of the Kaiba Corp Tower, and his body here was just a series of algorithms, and if he didn’t want to sweat, he didn’t have to fucking sweat! Thank God!

Up ahead, Kaiba noted the absence of his footfalls and turned around, one hand resting easily on his sword hilt. From his position on the path, he looked down at Ryou from several feet up, which doubled the intimidation of his already formidable bearing.

“I’m fine,” Ryou said. “Just... admiring the view.”

“Are you having your Matrix moment? That’s what my programmers call it,” Kaiba said.

Ryou laughed. “I think so. I was tired but I don't feel it at all, anymore. Like all the fatigue's just melted away and I could run a marathon.”

“Is that something you enjoy?”

“Oh, no. I hate sports.”

Kaiba snorted.

“So, tell me. Why do you want this job?” he said. “At my company? Writing stories with my technology?”

“Er - ” Blindsided by the swerve in topics, Ryou tripped over his thoughts. Surely he must’ve read his application? Maybe he didn’t have the time. Stick to straightforward. “I’m sure you remember my performance in Battle City?”

“Yes, I remember,” Kaiba said, which was honestly more than Ryou expected of him.

“Well, I don’t play much Duel Monsters anymore,” he said, “but I still.. every once in a while, I turn my Duel Disk on and play a few cards, just to see my monsters come out, see them breathe… you know I run a Zombie deck, full of demons and dead things, but SolidVision makes them feel so - so alive. You took these fantasy monsters that exist only in our heads and put them in our world.”

“Virtual World game writers don’t work on SolidVision products,” Kaiba countered.

“Right, I know that. To me, Virtual World and SolidVision are the inverse of each other, or opposites that contain each other, like, like yin and yang - with SolidVision, the unreal enters the real, and becomes real. In the Virtual World, the real - ” Ryou motioned to himself - “enters the unreal, and becomes unreal. We like to put walls between imagination and reality, you know, taxes are real and unicorns aren’t, but with SolidVision and Virtual World, there is no wall. That’s the world I want to write stories for.”

“Hm,” Kaiba said, the corner of his mouth curving up in a smile. “Interesting take.”

And he waited, saying nothing more, until Ryou realized he was waiting for him; and trotted lightly up the path to join him.

*** 

By the time they reached the top of the mountain pass, the air had turned a clear, dusky gold. The mountains cast long, black shadows across the valley, like dark teeth, chewing up the farmlands. The mountain pass was saddle-shaped, one side sloping down into the valley they’d just come from, the other flattening into a smaller, higher bowl, cupping a pale blue-green lake between its rocky palms.

Kaiba scrambled onto the nearest large rock, his head swinging as he scanned the lake valley. Ryou wrapped one arm around his waist and bit his thumb. They had found a deep, penetrating quiet, the kind of wilderness quiet that was devoid of texture of any kind; no bugs or burbling streams or bird song. It was not even like holding your breath, waiting, because that implied a coming moment of exhale, a sigh of relief. This was a perfect stillness. 

And hidden somewhere inside it was a dragon. 

Ryou bit harder, until he remembered the pain was fake and did nothing, and he had to come up with something else to temper his anxiety, which was definitely, definitely real.

Kaiba's gonna flip his shit when he sees your dragon, Yuugi said, from the back of Ryou's mind, Ryou's demo manuscript in hand. In a good way or a bad way? Is it too derivative? What does it matter that he'll flip his shit for my dragon when he flips his shit for ANY dragon? He's a slut for dragons. Oh my god, you can't say that! Yuugi, please, help - nope. You got this. You know what you're doing.

Even the metallic shing of Kaiba’s sword coming out of its sheath seemed small, in an unnatural way, a pointless, petty defiance. 

A shadow fell across the lake valley. 

Both of them looked up -

and an enormous dragon hurtled out of the sky, landing with thundering force on all four clawed feet, flattening trees and boulders beneath its reptilian bulk. Ryou staggered backwards and fell, in an awkward, clumsy crab pose; Kaiba threw his shield over his face and dug in, undaunted.

"HAVE YOU COME TO KILL ME?" the dragon boomed. “MISERABLE WRETCH?”

Kaiba lowered his shield, just enough for his first full look at the dragon. From his spot, crumpled on the ground, Ryou saw, in the shadow below the shield, another slender smile. The dragon’s hide was a dark, luxurious blue-black, mottled like snakeskin but textured with the heavy crags and knobs of crocodiles. It lowered its head on its long, arching neck, gracefully bearing the weight of two massive, curving horns, and stared down at them with fathomless acid-green eyes.

Even Ryou, who had designed it, sat enthralled: every movement it made - the eager flick of its tail, the claws, curling into the dirt, glinting under a layer of blood and grime, the shuddering of its leathery wings as they folded into its long body - hinted at indomitable power. It was a true creature of legend, a titan from the youngest days of the world, demanding both reverence and terror.

“I have!” Kaiba replied blithely, despite announcing it in a ringing voice.

“ONLY THE CHOSEN ONE CAN DEFEAT ME,” the dragon said. “YOU ARE NOT WORTHY OF SUCH A FEAT. I SEE YOUR HEART, BLACKGUARD KNIGHT. I CAN TASTE THE BLOOD YOU’VE SPILLED WITH YOUR SWORD, BRIGHT AND PUNGENT. I CAN HEAR THE CRIES OF ALL THE LIVES YOU’VE LET EBB INTO THE DIRT AT YOUR FEET!”

“I’m here to avenge the village!” Kaiba shouted. 

“YOU COME UP HERE TO DEFEND SOME PATHETIC SCRAPS OF BRICK AND WOOD, THINKING YOU CAN KILL ME, AND CALL THAT HONOR? REDEMPTION? YOU CALL THAT COURAGE? ITS TRUE NAME IS VANITY! EMPTY AND FALSE! IT WILL STRIKE YOU DOWN BEFORE I DO!” the dragon boomed again. “LEAVE. I WAS ONCE NAIVE AND VAIN LIKE YOU. COME BACK WHEN YOU ARE MORE THAN A MERE WORM, OR ELSE SUFFER MY FATE!”

Ryou had clambered to his feet and bolted for the safety of a low ridge, which gave him a perfect view of Kaiba, head held high and proud as he gazed unflinching at the dragon, several hundred times his size. He’d written those words in his notebook on the metro, leaning his head against the cool midnight glass, pausing every other line to ferret out another piece of sour candy from his bag. Then he’d missed his stop. That trundling, light-washed world of a train car seemed impossibly distant now - a rapidly fading dream, to be remembered only in flashes and silence. To hear the words come out of the smoking jaws of this dragon, each syllable flowing in a delicious, indulgent baritone from its shining teeth, filled him with a breathless exhilaration, his heart hammering in his throat - this was real!

“Only one of us is suffering fate today!” Kaiba shouted back, a laugh in his voice, and then threw a glance at Ryou. “‘Suffer my fate?’ Is that a typo?”

“VERY WELL. COME KILL ME! THERE IS PEACE IN DEATH, AND ONLY ONE OF US CAN CLAIM IT!”

“I - watch out!” Ryou yelled, as the dragon lunged forward, its jaws snapping shut on the empty air where Kaiba had been standing half a second before. Kaiba threw himself out of the way, a nimble tuck and roll, and scrabbled across the shale towards higher ground. Behind him, the dragon swung its massive head, nostrils red and flaring, mouth curled up in a savage draconic grin, glinting with the promise of violence. 

No sooner had Kaiba flung himself behind a scattering of boulders, shield raised, than it unleashed a jet of fire so hot and scorching the boulders glowed red, their rough faces melting in sheets. Ryou felt the heat wash across his face, from several dozen yards away. 

The fire died out. The dragon snorted in satisfaction, horse-like, a loud, wet huff of smoke. The boulders sizzled as they cooled into their new, bizarrely dripping forms.

Kaiba emerged from behind a boulder, sweating and singed, his face streaked with ash and his eyes shining. He tossed the warped, melted wreckage of his shield aside, where it bounced and clattered against the rocks.

“SO YOU STILL LIVE? A MISTAKE. WHAT COMES NEXT WILL HURT WORSE!”

“For you!” Kaiba hurled back, and threw his hand into the air, a gesture Ryou had seen countless times on a duel field - a lightning rod, a summoning. “VENTUS!” 

The wind picked up, in a giddy, howling whirl, bringing with it a cloud of dust that descended gritty and blinding and pale across the valley. Kaiba and the dragon vanished from sight inside it. Mentally Ryou subtracted one spell from Kaiba’s satchel.

“THIS WON’T HELP Y - ” Cut off by a wet chop and an ear-splitting draconic scream, a raw, awful sound, torn out of an unwilling throat. Just below it, a glorious, cascading laugh. “WRETCH! WORM!”

The dust settled, revealing glistening, dark-green blood splattered across the rocks, and a single severed claw, its flesh still twitching. The dragon seethed, its wounded foot curled in agony. Kaiba was clear across the other side of the pass, by the dragon’s tail, grinning open-mouthed as he panted for breath. His chainmail and surcoat dripped with dragon blood; his hair was thick with it. 

“COME GET YOUR PEACE, DRAGON!” he bellowed, and the dragon slung its head around, tail coiling in an ominous whip. 

Again Kaiba lifted his hand, shouted “VENTUS - !”

And a second dust cloud barreled into the valley, as the dragon roared back, “THAT WON’T WORK AGAIN!”

It whipped its tail through the dust cloud, a scythe-like sweep - smacking something hard into the rocks with a thick, fleshy crunch of bone that made Ryou’s insides clench tight with terrified sympathy.

The dragon whirled around, clearing the dust with several storm-gathering wingbeats.

This was not real. This was just pixels, neatly arranged and running in rivers of algorithms - just a clever series of ones and zeroes - and yet Ryou gasped, the dragon laughing, at the sight of Kaiba lying in a crumpled, motionless heap in the rocks. He hadn’t considered Kaiba might actually fail to kill the dragon - all thoughts of jobs and game-writing abandoned - unreality aside, the mind had a way of making it real - what the fuck happened if Kaiba died?

“IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE, WORM?” the dragon said, nudging Kaiba’s limp body with its claws, rolling him over. His head lolled, his body twisted into a horrifying, broken-boned slouch. How on earth was Ryou going to explain this to Yuugi? Hell. “I TOLD YOU, YOU'RE NOT W - ”

Ryou almost didn’t see it - a hawk in a dive, arrow-straight, from the top of the sky, diving through a blinding flash of light several stories up - and out of the light came Kaiba, alive and whole, plummeting towards the dragon’s head, gripping his sword with both hands - plunging it straight through the top of the dragon’s skull. 

He left the sword hilt-deep in dragon flesh as he pitched forward with the force of impact, rolling over the dragon’s brow, flailing to catch himself - on the massive horn. Clinging, victorious, as the great dragon swayed, its green eyes filming, and finally slumped, in agonized slow motion, to the earth, body first, head last, with a thundering, bone-rattling crash. 

It released one last, rattling breath, the trees shuddering in the fetid breeze.

The valley descended into stillness once more. 

Ryou sat down on his low escarpment with a limp thump, burying his face in both hands. This was just a Virtual World, where at one point everything would power down and they’d wake up safe and sound in the squishy, air-conditioned comfort of a pod, and he had, after all, planned on Kaiba killing the dragon, but Kaiba’s sheer nerve seemed beyond that. Yuugi was right. The guy was, maybe, a little nuts. Completely off his rocker.

“Ryou,” Kaiba said, above him, and Ryou lifted his head. Kaiba rested the sword jauntily across his shoulder, the rest of him filthy with dragon blood and human blood and dirt. “I have to say, I enjoyed your dragon. A shame it had to die.”

“Your strategy... You used a glamour spell? On a... rock? To make it look like your dead body,” Ryou said. “And then a transformation spell.”

“Correct. Is that all for your demo?” Kaiba said, cocking an eyebrow, both bloody and disdainful, and Ryou swallowed. “I was hoping for more of a cha - ”

His words stopped hard in his throat, a harsh, hacking sound. His free hand flew to his neck, mouth dropping open in pain and confusion, eyes widening. He coughed - or tried to, achieving nothing more than a thin, ugly retching, his face going white - and Ryou watched, in fascinated horror, as his gamble began to play out. There was nothing he could do to help; he’d written it that way.

The sword clattered to the stones, green blood dripping off the shining edge, as Kaiba staggered sideways, gasping for breath, both hands on his neck - what was the algorithm doing to him? Ryou had only written ‘a suffocating, squirming pain, concentrated in the lungs,’ and resolved to think more carefully about what types of pain he might inflict on the player characters, if the gamble paid off... But how interesting to know even the creator of the Virtual World himself suspended his disbelief - his knowledge of the truth - sometimes, and indulged in pain...

He collapsed to his knees, stretching one hand out, fisting it around Ryou’s collar and dragging him closer - 

“What - ” he choked out, eyes glaring into Ryou’s, in baffled, furious agony - terrified - they rolled backwards, the blue sliding away to white, as he slumped over himself. 

His hand went slack and fell. What life remained slipped away in a low, shaking sigh.

Ryou took him by the shoulders and gently lay him down, passing a hand over his eyes to close them. Dead, but not really.

“Just hold on a moment,” he said. The body had been vacated. The soul - the player - was awakening elsewhere.

He waited a few moments, absorbing the stillness, the detail on the leaves of the pine trees; the way the lake water shimmered in golden flecks with late afternoon light. It was maybe his last few seconds to enjoy the world he’d written, rendered in full splendor by the magic of technology, and he’d banished his anxiety from both his mind and body, to live out its exile in the real world. It didn’t belong here.

The great dragon body began to stir, drowsily, waking up from a deep, deep sleep. The deepest sleep.

Ryou stood up and slid down the escarpment to the dragon, pebbles and dust avalanching around his feet. The stab wound in its skull was knitting back together; the severed claw was crawling back to its slow-bleeding joint. There was an agonized hiss, forced through the dragon’s tightly-clenched teeth, and a vibrating groan, deep in its chest, as it gathered itself out of death.

Its eyes opened, in wary slits - not the bright, acid green, but a stunning, oceanic blue.

“OW. FUCK,” it growled, in Kaiba’s voice, magnified and twice as resonant. “OPEN MASTER COMMANDS, USER ID 000002510. SUSPEND ALL PAIN ALGORITHMS. CLOSE MASTER COMMANDS.”

He rolled upright, flexing his wings with experimental care. He arched his neck, looking down at Ryou.

“YOU TURNED ME INTO A DRAGON.”

“Yes,” Ryou said cautiously.

“NO ONE HAS EVER TURNED ME INTO A DRAGON BEFORE,” Kaiba said. ”SO I WASN’T WORTHY? IS THIS WHAT IT MEANS TO SUFFER THE DRAGON’S FATE? EVERYONE WHO KILLS THE DRAGON BECOMES THE DRAGON, AND ONLY THE CHOSEN ONE BREAKS THE CYCLE. IS THAT HOW IT GOES?”

“That’s how it goes.”

“HOW DO I FIND THE CHOSEN ONE?”

“You choose them,” Ryou said. “You decide what makes them worthy.”

"SO ANYONE CAN BE THE CHOSEN ONE? ANYONE CAN BREAK MY CURSE?"

"That's right."

Kaiba pondered that for a moment, flexing his claws idly in the dirt, the massive slabs of muscle in his shoulders shifting as he tested the strength and fit of his new draconic body. His gaze drifted out over the lower valley, eyes clouding briefly with memories of another story, another game, another man; one who had always seemed real and unreal, all at once, no matter what world he lived in. Ryou had heard it all from Yuugi.

Then Kaiba looked at him and started to laugh, a sound that echoed and rebounded across the small lake valley, the water shivering as each delighted peal of laughter rolled across. Ryou blushed as it buffeted him from all sides.

“IS THAT SO,” Kaiba said, with dry relish. “YOU’RE HIRED.”

[s-creations]

Return the Flames - Chapter 6

All at Dead Bird Studios knew of Amos' (The  Conductor's) ability. How the owl could suddenly erupt into flames if  angered enough. When the studio first opened, Dominic (DJ Grooves) was  told that Amos had his ability under control. Nothing to worry about. No  possible loss of anything from an open flame.

A few years later however, and that control seems to have lessened to a dangerous degree.

It should have just been a simple, week long drive to fix the problem. It really should have been.

Dominic should have asked a lot more questions and should have been prepared for a twist ending.

_________________

Fandom: A Hat in Time   Rating: General Audience   Relationships/Pairings: The ConductorXDJ Grooves   Warnings: Eventual depictions of violence, slow burn relationship, named characters, attempt of an accent, being hunted down, a race against time (sort of).

Another dinner, this one with a more pastel color scheme. For some reason. Dominic and Amos claimed a booth tucked away in the back, away from everyone, in hopes they could talk without being overheard. 

Amos was absolutely exhausted. Wanting nothing more than to lay his head down and pass out. It was a bit ironic that for being dangerously hot for so long, he was now freezing. And it was painful. Like pins and needles sticking him in different areas. Probably feeling like this while his body attempted to recover from their crash. He really wished the flame would return. That he could just curl into the closest corner and escape this nightmare for just a little while. 

“Amos...we need a plan.”

Except Dominic kept pulling him back to the problem at hand. Which was needed. Amos just didn’t want to. “We need ta figure out how those peck necks knew about…”

The penguin sighed softly. “I think all we need to worry about for that is knowing that they know. And they’re hunting us down now because of this. Do you think they knew where we’re going?”

“If they knew about the Phoenix flame, I wouldn’t put it past them. They found us really fast after that first dinner.”

“So, our original, direct path is no longer an option. We’ll probably have to make a new, longer path to get to the mountains. Anything to keep them away from us. We’ll just need to make sure you’re alright to stay away for that much longer. Ah, there’s also the issue of provisions and transportations. Thank goodness our wallets survived with us. I would say bus for traveling. But that would take way too long and we’d be trapped if they find us again. So, a rental car would be our best bet. We’ll also need to contact the studio. Let them know we’re going to be gone for a lot longer than originally expected…”

Amos just stared as Dominic kept pulling up the major points they had to worry about. As the list kept growing, the owl felt his resolve break down further. As if he was suddenly realizing how much danger they were in. At the moment they weren’t being chased, they were patched up and food was on the way. Now, with the adrenaline not pumping as much as it was before, Amos’ mind was free to panic over their current situation. 

Someone was hunting him down. Because of what he was. And he put Dominic directly in the line of danger because of this. All because of him. He alerted the authorities because he wasn’t able to control himself. Because he was a danger to everyone he gets near. 

“Amos?”

The owl jumped, attention going from Dominic’s worried face down to his clenched hands lying on the table. “What.”

“You’re shaking.”

Was he?

“Talk to me. What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong- are ya really gonna ask me that after our plunge off the side of a cliff?”

“I don’t think we were up that high.”

“We almost died Dominic! Because I’ve been marked as enemy-number-one of some peck necks. With you as the unwilling accomplice.” 

“Unwilling?”

“Ya didn’t know it would lead ta this when you agreed ta take me. Ya shouldn’t be involved.”

“You didn’t know this would happen either. I became involved when I plowed those crows over with my car. We’re in this together.”

“But ya shouldn’t be! I should have found a way around this that didn’t involve anyone else. This is my problem. I should be fixin’ this on my own.” 

Just with everything else in his life. It was how he’s always operated. He learned how to fight, dealt with his ex leaving, his mother passing away, maintained his train, paid for his film equipment, raised Amelia, put her through college, started saving up for the grandchildren to get them through college as well. 

Everything. Everything he did alone. 

So why did he suddenly feel as if he needed help with this? He should have been able to figure out a solution on his own. 

Amos stilled when Dominic reached over and gently grabbed the owl’s balled up hands. So stunned, he allowed the penguin’s hands to properly slip into his. 

“I’m happy I’m here to help you.”

“How...can ya possibly say that?”

“Because I would be tearing my hair out with worry if I wasn’t with you. Over what could have been happening to you.”

“People are tryin’ ta kill us.”

“Then I’m even further relieved to be here and helping.”

Amos wasn’t sure what to say to that. Attention returning to their clasped hands, the owl felt his heart starting to pick up its pace. The familiar warmth returning to become a comforting presence. Dominic didn’t seem to be letting go soon, did Amos want him to? He realized he didn’t. Dominic’s feathers were smooth to the touch, like silk. And seemed to be a cooler temperature than Amos��� unnatural heat. 

“Um, sirs? Your meals?”

Amos quickly pulled away as the server made their presence known. His feather fluffed up in embarrassment while Dominic gave an easy smile. “Thank you, Darling.”

“O-Oh, of course. No problem.” The server was now flustered. Giving their own smile back as they placed the plates down, departing shortly after.

“Should we make our new plan.” Amos grumbled as they were left alone again. 

“Right, well, transportation first. We need to rent a car.”

“You mentioned something about a bus?”

“Yes, but I don’t think that would be best. We need to control our speed and our direction at will. A bus leaves too many variables that we can’t control. Which worries me. So, I think the car is, again, our best option.”

“Alright… You also made mention of changin’ our route?”

“To try and throw them off. It took them two days to find us. And that was when they had a guess as to how far we were into our journey. That tells me they’re aware of where we’re going. If we change our path, hopefully we can throw them off and sneak by them when we finally reach the mountains.”

“If we can sneak in.”

“We’ll figure it out. If we’re moving our route, we need to inform everyone that we’re going to be gone longer than expected.”

“We also need provisions. We kind of...lost all our stuff.” 

“We have enough paper money to pay for what we need at the moment. Lucky us.” Dominic laughed softly. 

“Yeah...lucky…”

“Is everything alright gentlemen?” The server returned, their attention on the untouched plates. Amos didn’t verbally respond, instead picking up his fork and digging in. 

“Sorry, we’ve just been so engrossed in our conversation. Would you actually be able to help us out with something Darling?”

“Oh, sure!” Amos rolled his eyes at how eager the server sounded. 

“We’re in need of a rental car and a possible clothing store.”

“There are more, larger stores and a rental place further into town. You should be able to get what you need there.”

“Thank you, you’ve been extremely helpful.” 

Amos grumbled as he put his full focus on the food in front of him. Attempting to block out the sickening ‘flirting’ before him. It made his stomach roll uncomfortably. 

He couldn’t tell if it was because he hated seeing such a blatant display in public. Of it he was upset because Dominic wasn’t looking at him anymore. 

____________________________

“How much longer are you going to be gone?”

Amos really didn’t like how uneasy Amelia sounded. “Just a few extra days, nothin’ more.”

“Are you sure that’s a smart idea? Do you...will you have enough time?”

“I’ll be fine, don’t you worry. This was Dominic’s idea actually. Says I need ta ‘relax’ or somethin’ crazy like that.”

“Well, if it’s coming from Grooves, it sounds reasonable.”

“Watch yerself young lady.”

Amelia laughed softly. “Please just take it easy dad.”

“I will. I am. How’s it goin’ on your end?”

“Oh, good…”

“...Did...Did ya have another episode?”

“Yeah. But it wasn’t that bad. I’m fine, really. Just tired.”

Amos gripped the phone receiver a little harder. “Are ya goin’ ta see Dr. Fula?”

“Dad-”

“If ya had an episode, she needs ta be aware.”

“And she was, we called her.”

“Does she want ta see ya?”

“No, in fact, she said I was improving!”

“How? Yer still havin’ them!”

“But this was not as serve as my previous ones. And I recovered faster, and on my own.”

“But ya still had one.”

“Dad, you need to unclench your jaw and release whatever's in your other hand.”

With a huff with some smoke unfurling from his mouth, Amos pulled his hand away from the side of the phone booth. Wincing from the newly created dent in the metal. “Amelia…”

“No, listen to me. I am fine. I’m home, safe and happy with the kids. Grace is staying with me. And a legion of medical professionals are on speed dial. Now I need you to just focus on getting yourself better, okay?”

“...Okay.”

“I know you’ll hate me for saying this, but listen to Grooves. He’s there to help you.”

“But-”

“Swallow your pride and let him help. Please.”

“...Alright.”

“Get better and I’ll see you soon dad. The kids miss you! Can’t wait to see pawpaw again.”

“Tell them I miss them too.”

“Be safe dad. I love you.”

“Love ya too, Amelia.” Amos hung up, letting out a sigh as he leaned against the pay phone. He looked over to Dominic, who was using the furthest phone in the line. 

The penguin was calling the secretary to let him know they were going to be gone longer. Which Dominic was really leaning into the fact the message needed to be pasted along to all the workers. How they both would be coming back. 

Bu̱t͙ tha̦ṱ’̨s͙ no̱t tr̥ue͙,̝ i͜s̙ it̼?͕ Yo̳uͅ’̨re n̺ot ex̖p̱e̻cting̖ t͉o c̝ome̖ back͍ fṛo̭m t̻h̘i̬s̟.

Amos swallowed weakly. Stuffing his hands into his pockets, he moved away from the phones and turned towards the street. 

A̟lwa̻ys̨ t̺h͔e̞ sa̞m̤e̠ fo͈r͉ y̦ou. Eͅx̱p̼e̞ct̝ th̺e͓ worͅsṱ. Be͜c̘ause th̤aṱ’̮s͚ a͍ḽl͎ t͢ha̝t͢ is to b̢e̖ e̦xp̗ect͔ed of̹ y̳ou. Th͟e͇ a̗bs͜olu̱te̹ w͓o͢r̖st̝.

Sitting on the curb, Amos crossed his arms over his knees, chin resting on top of them. His ears were pressed against the top of his head, remaining focused on the pavement of the road. 

J͈us̬t a̯d̻mi̡t̤ it̯:̺ you’r̢e d̩yiͅn̢g. Yo̯u’ve k͈nown t͇his fo͜r̗ a w̤h̨i͉ḷe. Y̙et̳ yo̟u̼ ke̥ep̙ g̗i͙vi̯n͇g th̰i͕s se̘ns͇e̘ o̖f͟ hop͖e͇ to yo͈u̱r daug͙h̳ter th͜a͜t̡ y̢ou’ll͖ c̦o͜m͟e̩ b̖a̢ck.̟ How͢ seͅl͔fis̩h of̢ ỵo̮ṷ. N̗ot̫ eve̝n g͎i̞vi̲n͍g͔ ḫe͚r͔ a cha̢nc̘e to̭ h̩a̩ve͢ p̩ro̭p͍e͙r c͚l͕os̝ur̠e̥.

“Amos.” Dominic’s voice broke through, a hand resting gently on the owl’s shoulder. 

“Finally pass the message?”

The penguin nodded as he sat down. “I’m hoping it’s actually passes along.”

“We really need ta replace him.”

“We do…”

“...But we aren’t.”

“Probably not.”

Amos huffed, a smile being pulled onto his face. “As long as we have that cleared up.”

“Mmm… Were you able to talk to Amelia?”

“Aye…”

“Does...Does she know what this could lead to?”

“No. She doesn’t need to know.”

“Amos-”

“She has enough on her plate ta deal with. This is my problem.”

“But if your-”

“We need to go. If we want ta keep ahead o’ those government peck necks, we’ll need that car” Amos stood, heading towards where their server had pointed them. Dominic gave a look of disapproval to the retreating back. But couldn’t really disagree as he knew time was not on their side. 

So, even though the penguin wanted to reprimand Amos for leaving his daughter in the dark, Dominic remained quiet. One problem at a time. And they had agents to avoid. 

[happymetalgirl]

Motionless in White - Disguise

I have made repeatedly clear on here that I love me some good, sweet, sugary, delicious, indulgent, so-not-high-brow alt metal that many wou classify as pop metal. I'm an open minded boy and I don't think liking bitterly harsh industrial DSBM noise doom means I can't like the sweeter side of metal too. And that's where Motionless in White enter the stage of 2019.

I definitely remember Motionless in White's 2017 effort, Graveyard Shift, more fondly for its cherry-picked, punchy, and well-produced alternative/nu-metalcore bangers like "Untouchable", "Queen for Queen", "Voices", and "Eternally Yours" than it definitely was as a whole. But even if Graveyard Shift wasn't any kind of alternative metal or metalcore masterpiece in its entirely, I was actually looking forward to just getting a few more of those types of standout tracks from Disguise, just to add few more blood-pumping bangers to add to my workout personal playlist, or perhaps even the faint hope of a shift toward focusing the more direct, energetic types of ragers that stood above the crop on Graveyard Shift.

Well, sometimes hopes and dreams do come true; Motionless in White go more fully into the nu metal and metalcore-infused alternative metal on Disguise than they did more occasionally on Graveyard Shift. And while this album is still not without some of its own and some of Graveyard Shift's residual issues and probably not sitting too well with fans of the band's more longtime fans who got into them through Creatures or Infamous, this is definitely a more fertile creative space for the band to draw power from and thrive in than the desiccating fields of generic metalcore within their crop they had already harvested dry.

The opening title track finds the band pretty close to their sweet spot of nu metalcore and alternative metal with some already Chester Bennington-esque vocals with distortion effects that sound lifted from Hybrid Theory and jumpdfuckup groove that continues what the band set out to do on Graveyard Shift. It's a tightly composed track with little fat to trim that sets the tone for the rest of the album's alt. metalcore bangers well.

The few tracks that follow at the beginning of the album definitely carry that momentum well even if they do expend the majority of the album's firepower kind of early. The subsequent "Headache" features some Slipknot-inspired record scratches and high pitched whirs to enhance a more suspensefully menacing mood. But the chorus' dark melody really makes the song. "C0de" is a bouncy industrial metalcore tune with a bit of balance from its more pop-influenced alt metal chorus, which gets perhaps just a tad repetitive, but it's not enough to diminish the song's enjoyability. The vicious "Thoughts and Prayers" is probably the best moment on the album with its relentless metalcore verses and its defiant melodic chorus. It's more in line with the standard of metalcore, but the aggression is fitting for the song's subject matter and the band show that they have the capacity to take on the second wave's trademark clean/harsh approach with their industrial and alternative metal flavoring. "Holding on to Smoke" sounds like an extra punchy and metalcore-influenced Breaking Benjamin song during its emotionally exhausted choruses, which is, again, where Motionless in White sound at their optimum.

Even the album's later songs like the woah-laden "Legacy" (which sounds like an Imagine Dragons song during its choruses, except with much more energy) and the Breaking Benjamin-ish power balladry of "Another Life" that stretch out a bit too long on their pop formulas still manage to contribute at least to the tonal diversity of the album and really aren't all that bad either at accomplishing their intended purpose.

The band also partake in their usual samples of horror-inspired gothic metalcore for good measure on the spookily string-supplemented back-to-basics "Undead 2: The Tale of the Mightnight Ride" and the pair of very Rob Zombie-esque songs, "Broadcasting from Beyond the Grave" and "Brand New Numb", which all provide a welcome break from the rest of the more typically styled and structured songs among them.

The closing song, "Catharsis", is unfortunately just a bit too drab of a traditional alternative metal closer after all the fireworks that precede it, and it's definitely not a very conclusive way to finish the album off. But luckily it's not enough of a landing stumble to negate the showmanship of the rest of the album's routine.

While Disguise might not even hit the same high points that Graveyard Shift's best moments did and while it definitely comes with its own moments of nu metal cheesiness that the band showed themselves to be susceptible to on its predecessor, it is the more consistent album of the two. And I don't think this was nearly as bad of a jump into the deep end of late 2000's alt/nu metal as it definitely could have been. For the most part, the band play to the strengths of the genre and their own. I'm sure there will be ample preexisting detractors as well as many within the band's fan base that decry the significant increase in the pop-influenced structuring on this album and the obviousness of the band's influences worn so upfront right there on their sleeve. But they've never been shy about channeling their favorite bands, and this time they're at least playing to their refined strengths so that their costume-changing masquerade is at least very well-designed. While I will agree that the "pop sensibility" probably makes the album a bit too formulaic as a whole, I still think this is a step in the right direction for Motionless in White: away from the blatant Antichrist Superstar mimicry and early Bullet for My Valentine knock-offs, and toward a largely abandoned but open style that they can prove to still have plenty of vibrant, explosive potential. I think another tweak of the balance to emphasize the power of the band's metalcore foundations more so that the pop flavors don't drown them out would be a logical and easy step toward the ideal Motionless in White album, and this album is definitely a fine stepping stone in that path that the band hopefully continue toward.

Just a little bit to the left/10

[featherxquill]

Fics Wot I Wrote in 2018

This is the first time I’ve been able to do this list since 2015, which I am so happy about I can barely even articulate. I missed writing constantly while I wasn’t, but didn’t have sufficient fangirly inspiration to gather the mental energy required to write while also having a full-time job. But this year, The Infinite Bad and its band of idiots hit me in exactly the place I needed to explode with words, even with a tiny, tiny fandom of fic readers. Thank you to those people who consistently read and left kudos, and an even bigger THANK YOU to commenters and those who chatted with me about these characters, because kudos are nice but comments are fuel. Anyway. Here is Wot I Wrote last year:

April 13 - Warriors - Cornelia and Sebastian share a drink in the aftermath of Goose Lake. Gen, PG.

May 9 - Further Investigations of the Tantra (Or: Cornelia Gets her Groove Back) - At the Webster Hotel, Cornelia meets an altogether more genuine American gent. Cornelia/OMC, PG.

May 31 - Respite - A mid-season ficlet. Joy, Cornelia, G.

July 3 - Unravelling - Post Karajah, Joy and Cornelia share a moment. Joy, Cornelia, G.

July 21 - Dreaming the Fox - Cornelia dreams of the fox-faced men and also husbands. Cornelia/Fox Man, Cornelia/Brendel, M.

August 26 - Breathe - Upstairs at the Webster, part 1. Cornelia/OMC, E.

Sept 25 - not just a river in egypt - Blatant denial. Sebastian is old and has a dog. Sebastian, Joy, G.

Dec 15 - Tethers - Upstairs at the Webster, part 2. Cornelia/OMC, E.

And here is the self-indulgent fic meme. Under a Read More to spare you. Apologies to those on mobile.

Longest Story Written: Breathe (8,122) Shortest Story Written: Respite (884)

My favourite story of this year: Tethers. I think it has to be, because when I started thinking about it I had not a single comment on the first part, and decided I could just write it anyway for myself, so I DID.

My best story this year: Further Investigations of the Tantra. I honestly think I did pretty well with the performative Cornelia voice, and I’m super proud of it.

Best received story: TIB is a pretty small fandom, so I think the fact that people actually read and enjoyed Warriors was the most significant. If I’d posted that to silence, I probably wouldn’t have kept writing, so thanks for being interested, peeps.

Most fun story: egypt. It was just a pure fluff ‘bye going to play in my own sandbox’ type fic, after all.

Hardest story to write: Dreaming the Fox took me a while, and we had new, rather significant canon between the start of me writing it and the end, which I then decided I needed to address, so probably that? As usual, though, the hardest ones are still half-complete in my gdocs.

“Holy crap, that’s *wrong*, even for you” story: I don’t think I wrote anything super wrong, but I guess Dreaming probably gets this honour as well? It was certainly the most horror-y, and the vague sense of sexual threat from/attraction to the fox-man was probably the closest I’ve ever come to writing something furry (though it’s probably not tbh, I don’t know anything about what actually makes something furry)

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: Well, not so much shifted, since I made him, but I really came to enjoy Leo the OC (NPC?) while writing ‘Breathe’. I became quite fond of him, and it was also really enjoyable to try and imagine Cornelia through the eyes of someone attracted to her.

Biggest disappointment: Eh, NGL, I wish more people had read and enjoyed the smut fic. It always makes me sad when old people smut gets poor reception. Also, I write good porn, and people should read it.

Biggest surprise: I didn’t post ‘Respite’ to ao3 because I thought it would probably be scuppered the following week, and holy shit, was I right. The episode could not have been further way from ‘Cornelia gets a little bit of comfort from her daughter’, lol endless screaming.

Most unintentionally telling story: I mean, porn is always telling. Shh.

Sexiest story: I think ‘Breathe’ and ‘Tethers’ are probably similar, but I’m going to go with the first, given that it was a little less self-indulgent and also I asked a beta to look at it.

Favourite summary:

 But huge and mighty forms, that do not live    Like living men, moved slowly through the mind    By day, and were a trouble to my dreams.

That’s the summary I posted for Dreaming the Fox. It’s from the ‘stealing the boat’ section of Wordsworth’s Prelude, which was, incidentally, what I was revising with my class the morning that The Brendel Thing happened in canon. I was so overwhelmed that morning that I didn’t know how the hell I was going to pull my brain together enough to teach, but I somehow managed it, and it was only when I got to the end of the poem that I realised how appropriate it was to many of TIB’s themes/repeated imagery, and also how appropriate to the fic I had been working on.

Favourite opening line(s):

‘Warm skin, a heartbeat, fingers toying with her hair: the luxurious decadence of lying naked with a man she’s just made love to. Cornelia Cavendish is having - not an out of body experience, because she’s more in her body than she’s been in years, right inside all the pleasant tingles and aches that come in the aftermath of sex - but an out of self experience.’

I just really like this idea, and it was the perfect way to crawl into Cornelia’s head for this story. I have felt the out-of-self idea myself in the travel moments she goes on to describe, and drawing on it here really helped make her head feel real to me. Hopefully it also worked for the two people who read it.

Favourite lines from anywhere:

‘He’d known she wasn’t wearing a corset by the feel of her, but he is unprepared for the sight of her so undressed, all long limbs and skin. The elegant twist of her hair has become mussed from his attention, and now a long curl of it dangles loose down the back of her neck, right to her shoulder blade.’ - This image was just so visual to me, and really goes with that idea of trying to imagine what Cornelia would look like to someone attracted to her that I mentioned earlier. idk, it makes me happy.

‘There is something potent about him, something primal, something she doesn’t understand but that she recognises with a part of herself that sings from the beginning of time.’ - I don’t know if I feel this because it’s a little bit cliche, or what, but I don’t even care. I really like it.

‘she’s using a cane for balance against the ship’s movement - a device she initially resisted, but seemed to take to when she realised that waving it at people usually resulted in her getting her way’ - this felt like the most Cornelia thing ever to me, and you have no idea how happy it made me when she actually WAS carrying a cane (which she didn’t appear to actually NEED) in the final series. I maintain this as my headcanon for why.

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 28th October 2018

Top 10

This will be the last episode on a Thursday for a while as it returns to weekends, in fact, there’s going to be a new episode tomorrow, most likely. Let’s get this week over first though, and we start with a bang as we have a new number-one – yep, “Shallow” by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper takes the top spot on its fourth week after a three-space increase. This becomes Lady Gaga’s fifth and Bradley Cooper’s first #1 on the UK Singles Chart.

This also means that “Promises” by Calvin Harris and Sam Smith is down a spot to number-two.

As is “Funky Friday” by Dave and Fredo pushed back to number-three.

Oh, as well as “Happier” by Marshmello and Bastille, also down a spot to number-four.

“Let You Love Me” by Rita Ora has entered the top five at number-five after a one-spot boost.

Little Mix’s “Woman Like Me” featuring Nicki Minaj fell a spot this week to number-six but the video will definitely keep it in the top 5 next week.

We actually have a debut at number-seven, as Post Malone and Swae Lee’s “Sunflower”, the lead single from the Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse soundtrack. This is Post’s fifth top 10 hit and Swae Lee’s third (second as a solo artist).

“ZEZE” by Kodak Black, Travis Scott and Offset is up three spots to number-eight, to my surprise and dismay.

“Electricity” by Silk City and Dua Lipa is steady at number-nine.

Finally, “In My Mind” by Dynoro and Gigi D’Agostino is starting to fall out, down two spots to number-ten this week.

Climbers

We don’t have too many at all this week, in fact, it’s pretty much just a handful. Thanks to the release of the Suncity EP (#20 debut on the albums chart if you’re wondering), Khalid’s lead single “Better” is up four spots to #18, entering the top 20 and becoming Khalid’s sixth top 20 hit in the UK. Otherwise, however, there are just a few boosts for A Star is Born songs, with “Always Remember Us This Way” by Lady Gaga up six positions to #25, whilst “I’ll Never Love Again” with Bradley Cooper is up seven spaces to #27.

Fallers

There are only a few of these as well, actually, with “MIA” by Bad Bunny and Drake falling off eight spots to #21, “Venom” by Eminem dropping five spaces to #28, “Thunderclouds” by LSD (Labrinth, Sia and Diplo) making its way out, falling five positions to #34, and thankfully, “Falling Down” by the late Lil Peep and XXXTENTACION is down seven to #40, and hopefully will be going soon.

Dropouts

My website that I use to easily get drop-out info is finally updated, and while I won’t correct myself on the weeks where I didn’t have it, this two-week hiatus has made me wonder about this source’s reliability, to be honest. Anyways, we actually have quite a lot of dropouts here, as “breathin” by Ariana Grande is out from #26, “Best Life” by Hardy Caprio and One Acen is out from #35, “Drip Too Hard” by Lil Baby and Gunna is out from #36, “Lucky You” by Eminem featuring Joyner Lucas is out from #37, and, finally, “Taste” by Tyga and Offset is out from #38. A lot of good songs here, most of which had quite a bit of longevity, so, yeah, big drop-out week.

No returning entries this week so it’s straight to the new arrivals.

NEW ARRIVALS

#39 – “I Want You to Freak” – Rak-Su

Rak-Su are an English R&B act and boy band who won the 14th series of The X Factor last year, and had a massive hit with “Dimelo” that featured Wyclef Jean and Naughty Boy. All of the original songs they played throughout the run of their series were actually pretty damn good, with a lot of fun groove and songwriting chops present, so how do Rak-Su follow this up in their second top 40 hit? Well, it’s just one of the original songs in a studio version, and honestly, yeah, this was the worst one they sang, with the exhausted drum pattern present in reggaeton being drowned out by really ugly, disgusting buzzing synths, like, they just sound so freaking awful, how did this get past the executive producers? Anyways, the vocals are pretty fitting for this track, but no-one really shines, and the blatant interpolation of “Freak Like Me” by Adina Howard in the hook is just too much of a soulless hook grab for me to ignore its cheap inclusion – there’s not really any repurposing here at all. Yeah, sorry, boys, but that cluttered instrumental is borderline unlistenable, hence making this song pretty awful. Ditch your producers, guys, because Simon Cowell and Banx & Ranx clearly aren’t using your potential the way they should be.

#36 – “Kiss and Make Up” – Dua Lipa featuring BLACKPINK

Dua Lipa released a second deluxe edition (titled “Complete Edition”) to her self-titled debut album last week, and it included this new song that kind of blew up due to how big the featured artist, the K-pop girl group, BLACKPINK, are right now, and you know that when K-pop fans have new material they try and make it as big as possible, I mean, just look at BTS’s success. This is BLACKPINK’s first ever charting song in the UK, yet alone top 40 hit, which Dua Lipa now has 11 of, by the way, but does it live up to the hype? Well, sort of, yeah, actually, but can we just discuss the little intro vocal fragment because the manipulation makes it sound like the vocalists are saying “Beyblades”... which actually segues into the content of being in a constant spinning cycle of saying sorry, making up, and then breaking up again, maybe too perfectly. Oh, and I I love Dua Lipa’s performance here (as always), with the tropical vocal fragments throughout the verses popping up pretty sporadically being a nice little addition, whilst the skittering hi-hats may not have been as they just kind of don’t add to the energy of the song at all, which elevates with the pretty decent drop, may I add. I don’t know the names of the BLACKPINK girls and I’ve quite literally heard nothing from them before, but their performance here works with the beat effortlessly, so maybe I should check more out from them in the future. Good song.

#35 – “nASSty” – D-Block Europe (Young Adz and Dirtbike Lb) featuring Lil Pino

I have no bloody clue who any of these people are, so what I can say is that this is definitely the first top 40 hit for everyone involved. D-Block Europe is a collective lead by someone who’s way too enthusiastic about commercials and one of the strangest “riding” metaphors this side of “Body Like a Back Road”, and this particular song, featuring a dude who I’m sure named himself after those little novelty pine tree air fresheners you stick to a car, is their first to blow up, and I’m already having Vietnam flashbacks to Big Sean’s verse on “Mercy” based off the title alone, but is the song itself good? Well, I’ve been getting into more British trap and hip-hop recently, and while I haven’t heard that much, I can confirm this is probably not the best out there at all. The synths sound like stock loops, while the “nasty” vocalist that starts off the song loses any chance at being intimidating with the high-pitched, nasal autotuned voice, and cartoonish ad-libs. If you sound like kids, which they might as well be, you’re not going to exactly going to be very effective when you threaten to shoot me and take my girl. I love the ad-libs actually, they’re so energetic and easily the best part of this song, it reminds me of Desiigner’s hype man vibe actually. I would not be able to tell the difference between each one if Lil Pino didn’t state who he was in his incredibly short verse (seriously, it’s only a pathetic two bars). This is trash, but at least it’s amateur trash and not made by a major label, and instead just a couple kids having fun. I can forgive that.

#31 – “Ruin My Life” – Zara Larsson

Not this, though, and not because it’s all that bad, but become I feel like I’ve heard it before. Zara Larsson is a Swedish singer-songwriter who has made it pretty big for herself in Europe in recent years (with only some US crossover success). This is her eighth top 40 hit in the UK, and it is just as bland and cookie-cutter as everything else she’s ever released. Larsson sounds okay (especially in the hook, where the janky rapping flow actually works with the trap drums), but the airy synths are like clouds that never rain, as it’s not like what sound like incredibly fake handclaps are making anything interesting here. The chorus doesn’t have any pay-off until after the second chorus, where in the bridge, we actually see a pretty damn nice guitar riff return from the promising intro and immediately get abandoned in favour of the nothingness that the rest of the song consists of. What a snore.

#7 – “Sunflower” (Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse) – Post Malone and Swae Lee

Post Malone and Swae Lee – the more versatile half of rap duo Rae Sremmurd – have got big enough to start making soundtrack hits for big budget films, and I couldn’t be happier for the both of them, Post is an immensely talented songwriter and Swae’s a great vocalist, however they clearly don’t share the same traits, because Post’s unlistenable warbling is way too present, and his whining voice is something I just can’t dig, whilst Swae makes his songs way too long and often doesn’t have any worthwhile content. I feel like they’re polar opposites in a way, so this collaboration actually got me excited, especially with how much I’ve liked Swae’s input this year (not so much Post). I’m just as excited after listening because this is a fantastic freaking song. The record scratching over those snares, making it sound like static, just makes for such an interesting contrast when compared to the plinking and beeping synths, Swae’s smooth vocals and the dark, deep horn line – seriously, that instrumental is actually beautiful, with the vocal contributions from Swae adding a fun, catchy, melody in both the hook and verse, with his childlike naivety in his dynamics being incredibly charming. Then we have Post’s grittier, more mature voice that probably works even better on this production, especially when the beat cuts and we have that ticking in the background, and it’s pretty much just that and Post. Oh, God, that part’s amazing, and it ends on such a sweet guitar line. I’m not going to mince words, this is eligible for my best list and would easily be top 3 but since I think and hope this is going to stick around, I’m saving this for 2019 when I have more to say. One of the best pop songs to break into the top 40 this year, easily.

Conclusion

Well, what do you think? Of course, Post Malone and Swae Lee get Best of the Week for “Sunflower”, with Honourable Mention going to Dua Lipa and BLACKPINK for “Kiss and Make Up”. Worst of the Week should be obvious as well, Rak-Su get it for the awful “I Want You to Freak”, and Dishonourable Mention is going to D-Block Europe and Lil Pino for “nASSty”. See ya tomorrow, I guess.