#and just think it’s some pop bs that never became A Classic

[inktheblot]

The rotation of Christmas music that plays in the store I work at includes the following:

Any version of “Last Christmas” you could think of and then some, EXCEPT Wham’s

Various people trying to come up with weird new verses to “Jingle Bells”

Joey Ramone’s cover of “What a Wonderful World”

This one cover of “Do You Want To Build a Snowman” that’s sung in like. That specific really breathy way that pop singers do Christmas songs sometimes y’know?

The song from the Victorious Christmas episode

Three songs from the Phineas and Ferb Christmas special

“I Have a Dream” by ABBA except not the ABBA version

- DO YOU REMEMBER THE 25TH NIGHT OF DECEMBER

[jolgan]

Something Wicked Comes to Stay

Intro/Summary

Prologue

Chapter 1 

Rating: T

Warnings: teenagers making out, demons, knives, identity crises (plural), existentialism, strong language at times, violence (teenagers attacking each other in a controlled environment, mentions of gang violence, oh yeah, demons), Teen Angst and other dumb teenage bs

Word Count: 5.8k

Chapter: 3/?

A/N: I’m still experimenting with narration so if there’s inconsistencies or things seem awkward that’s why and I’m sorry. Also character descriptions... Sorry about those too. 

Chapter 2

Waves lapped at CeCe’s ankles, feet sinking further into the sand as she stared across the water. She could tell it was the ocean because of the salty brine in the air, even though the passage of water itself was narrow. On the opposite beach, a dark figure stared back at her from across the waves. She couldn’t tell anything about them, other than they were looking at her. This may have made her uncomfortable if it wasn’t something she’d seen before. Instead, it just left her frustrated.

A high-pitched beeping snapped CeCe from the beach. She opened her eyes and sighed. After a moment or two of staring at the ceiling she rolled over to turn off her alarm. She groaned, wishing she could go back to sleep, but it was the first day of school and she needed to get ready. She glanced toward the window as she got out of bed. It was pitch black out, not even four a.m. yet. CeCe yawned as she headed for the bathroom, thinking back to her dream.

She had been dreaming of the same beach since she was little. Before that, actually. Her mother dreamed of it when she was pregnant with her. The dreams started out as just the ocean, CeCe standing in the sand looking out across the vast expanse of the sea. Progressively, the ocean got smaller and another beach appeared. A while after that, the figure became visible, standing across from her. Although she had the same dream for her entire existence, she had no idea what it meant. No one else had any explanation for her either, other than it was probably linked with her powers. But she could have worse dreams she supposed. Some people might have even found them soothing, but they left her slightly unsettled at the lack of answers and made her feel like she kind of had to pee.

After getting ready for school, CeCe went downstairs to find something quick for breakfast. She was surprised to find both her parents in the kitchen waiting for her, but it made her smile that even though she was seventeen now, and perfectly capable of getting herself out the door, they still wanted to see her off on the first day of the new year. Wyatt sat at the table, scrolling through his news app and sipping coffee. Her mother, Melanie, poured her own cup and walked to the table to sit across from her husband.  

“You didn’t have to get up this early,” CeCe told them as she entered the kitchen, but they both ignored her statement.

“Good morning sweetie. Did you have good dreams?” Her mother asked

“Wet ones,” CeCe answered. She closed her eyes, immediately regretting what she just said. Luckily her parents ignored the double entendre. She was glad she didn’t say that in front of Chloe.

“The ocean again?” Wyatt asked. CeCe nodded in response. “Any new developments?”

CeCe shook her head this time. “No, it’s still just a dark figure standing across from me.”

“You’ll figure out what it all means soon,” Melanie assured her with an eerie tone in her voice. She always responded that way when it came to subjects like this one. It must come from experience; they did have the same power after all.

CeCe pondered what her mother meant as she put a pop tart in the toaster.

“It’s just frustrating. I’ve been having these dreams for as long as I can remember, but I still know nothing about them. It doesn’t make any sense. I wish I had more control.” She complained as she joined her parents at the table. She took a bite of her breakfast while Melanie spoke.

“I know, honey. Someday you’ll be in full control of your powers and it will be easier. But even then, you’ll only know what you’re supposed to in the moment.”  

CeCe knew her mother was right, but it didn’t make it any easier to accept. She echoed this thought in her words, “I know, Mom. But it would still be nice to have all the answers.”

Melanie chuckled and reached for CeCe’s hand. She squeezed it as she said, “But then there would be no adventure in life.”

CeCe finished her breakfast, hugged both her parents, and exchanged “I love you’s.”

“Be safe,” Wyatt called as CeCe was surrounded by white light and disappeared from the kitchen.

Magic School was on its own plane of existence. The specifics of this plane were unknown to most people, but it didn’t really matter. Everyone who needed to know how to get there did, and only those with pure intentions were allowed through the barrier. At least that’s how the Elder’s explained it. The school itself existed for thousands of years at this point and not much about it changed in all that time. Aesthetically, at least. The sun was shining when CeCe passed through the barrier. She landed on the cobblestone path and looked up fondly at the timeless school. The architecture was both ancient and modern and it was huge, no one alive today knew exactly how big it was. CeCe was grateful she got to go to school in such a beautiful place. She smiled to herself as she walked along the path to the tree that she and her friends had made their designated meeting place.

The three boys were already there when she arrived. Adam was sitting on the grass with a portable game console in his hands, fluffy, bleach blonde waves obscured his forehead and much of his eyes. Leaning against his back, was another bleach blonde boy, but his hair was straight and had longer, darker roots than Adam, giving it more of a two-toned look. The two boys had a similar build, both of about average height, or maybe even considered on the shorter side, and more wiry than anything else. The second boy was staring intently at the console he held in his hands. Laying in the grass front of them, was a smaller boy with wild red hair.

CeCe yawned a good morning and sat down next to the red head. “Why does school have to start so early? It’s not even five a.m. my time,” she said to no one in particular.

“How do you think Shoyo feels?” Adam questioned, barely looking up from his game. “It’s nine p.m. his time.”

CeCe looked at the red head next to her. “Are you gonna be okay today, Sho?” she asked.

The smaller boy, Shoyo, opened his eyes and squinted against the light. He stifled a yawn and smiled. “I’ll be okay. I started switching my sleep schedule around last week.”

CeCe smiled back and turned her head to address the other blonde boy. “What about you, Kenma? Ready for a new year?” she teased.

“I guess,” he answered, still fully invested in whatever game he and Adam were playing.

CeCe met Kenma Kozume four years ago when they were in the same class and got paired together for a project. Kenma is quiet and reserved and CeCe enjoyed being around him. His presence introduced a much calmer energy to the chaotic atmosphere that surrounded her and her cousins at the time. It was a classic mischievous, extrovert adopts unassuming, introvert situation. They got along well despite the differences in their personalities and eventually became very close. When CeCe introduced Kenma to her cousins, unsurprisingly, he and Adam hit it off rather quickly. They had a few commonalities and bonded over them. One of them being their interest in video games, another being that Adam was perceived as the least erratic of the Halliwell trio. Chloe, however, was a different story. They got along well enough, but their personalities clashed at times. Although Kenma was much quieter than the Halliwells, and based on the reputation that surrounded them, it didn’t seem to outsiders like he’d fit in, but he did. And much to his own chagrin, he enjoyed their energy.

Shoyo Hinata, however, visibly fit right in with the group. He was friendly and energetic. Shoyo was the newest addition and the youngest. He had only been a student at Magic School for two years, but when they met, Kenma and Shoyo took to each other right away. Soon after, Kenma introduced him to the cousins. They all loved his happy-go-lucky personality and welcomed him with open arms.

“Why aren’t you playing, Shoyo?” CeCe asked, gesturing to the console in Kenma’s hands.

“My mom won’t let me have one. She says they rot your brain,” he answered earnestly.

“How old fashioned,” Adam commented before swearing. “Damn it, Kenma! Again?”

Kenma shrugged. “No need to get sweaty about it, Adam. It’s just a game.”

“This is the fourth one I’ve lost this morning!” Adam complained.

“Guess I’m just built different,” Kenma deadpanned.

CeCe leaned closer to Shoyo. “I see what she means,” she said in a mock whisper. Her comment caused the younger boy to erupt into a fit of giggles and her cousin to whip his head around and glare at her with icy blue eyes. She smirked and cleared her throat. “Anyone seen Chloe yet?” she asked the group.

“She and Celine got here a little while before you did. They went inside already.” Adam told her, still glaring slightly.

“They seemed tense,” Kenma commented.

“They never argue verbally,” CeCe explained, knowing exactly what he sensed.

“I can understand where Celine is coming from. Chloe is a bit overprotective of her,” Adam empathized for his younger cousin.

Celine was Chloe’s younger sister and it was her first day back at Magic School since integration. Understandably, Chloe was worried for Celine’s safety and wellbeing and she let everyone know.

“Wait, how do they argue if it’s not out loud?” Shoyo wondered.

“They’re both empaths,” Kenma answered.

“No need for words when you know exactly what the other is feeling,” CeCe added.

Shoyo looked intrigued and then shuddered slightly, like he came to a realization.

The bell rang, cutting off any further discussion. The group collected their belongings and headed toward the entrance of the school. CeCe’s mind wandered as they walked, passing other groups of students. In the two years that passed since demons started coming to Magic School, tensions had settled. The transition was understandably rocky in the beginning, both sides butting heads frequently, but eventually they adjusted, and settled into their new reality. Some students had even made friends with their new classmates. Every now and then there was still a scuffle, but disciplinary actions were taken, and things were seemingly resolved.

At the front entrance of the school, glimmering marble steps lead up to a pair of giant wooden doors that were visibly ancient. Other students rushed around them, trying to make it to class on time. Once inside the school, the group of friends said their goodbyes and went their separate ways. Adam and Kenma joined hands and orbed to their first period class which they had together. “See you in fourth period?” CeCe asked Shoyo. He nodded with a grin and they too headed to first period.

The first half of the day flew by. CeCe had magical literature, potions, and lunch by herself, which she was used to. The administration learned early on in their education to not put any of the Halliwells in the same classes. This was a bit irritating now that they were maturing beyond their mischievous childhoods, but they understood that they created a reputation for themselves, and now they had to live with that.

Fourth period finally came along. CeCe was currently sitting in “Theory of Practical Healing” a class for half-whitelighters who haven’t awakened their healing abilities yet. She listened to the teacher drone on about how “You need to have enough compassion in your heart to be able to heal others.” CeCe rolled her eyes internally. She knew what it took to gain the ability to heal, if you were going to anyway. She shook the thought away and looked over her shoulder at Shoyo, who to her surprise, was listening intently and taking notes on what the teacher had to say. The more she thought about it, it made sense that this class would be able to hold his attention better than another subject. Shoyo was a born-whitelighter. This meant that one of his parents, in this case his father, was a whitelighter who fell in love with a mortal and had a child. There were a couple of them around, but it was a rare thing. Most of the other students in the class were half-whitelighter (or quarter in CeCe’s case), half-witch. After sitting for what seemed like way longer than an hour and twenty minutes, the class ended.

“Do you have a free period now, Sho?” she asked the red head as they packed up their materials. Before he could answer, they were interrupted by another student that was still in the classroom.

“Hey Hey, Hinata!” a big guy, both tall and muscular, with spiky gray hair exclaimed as he bounded up behind Shoyo and threw an arm over his shoulder. “Halliwell,” he added with a smile and nod in her direction. CeCe smiled back.

“Hey, Bokuto,” Shoyo greeted.

“Did you guys have a good summer?” Bokuto asked. Both CeCe and Shoyo told him they did. “That’s great to hear! Let me know if you need anything! I gotta go meet up with Akaashi,” he said, unwinding himself from the much smaller boy.

“How are you guys doing?” CeCe asked before he left.

With a dreamy look in his eyes, a dopey smile slowly spread across his face. “We’re great, thanks for asking,” he said before sobering up. “Alright, I’ll catch you guys later,” he said as he orbed off to find his boyfriend.

“They’re so cute,” CeCe commented, mostly to herself. “Anyway, you wanna come to the library with me?” she asked Shoyo.

The library was close enough to the classroom they were in, so they decided to walk and chat. CeCe asked Shoyo what he did over vacation since she hadn’t seen him since his birthday at the end of June. He explained that the school year was a bit different in Japan, and summer break was a lot shorter than what they had at Magic School, so he was pretty much home alone during the day for the first part of their summer.  He told her about how he took care of his little sister, Natsu and kept her entertained while their mother was at work. He also told her all about his friend Kageyama and how they practiced volleyball together for the rest of the break. Curiosity struck CeCe about how Shoyo managed to keep friends outside of Magic School and magic in general.

“Where does your friend think you go to school?” she asked, seemingly out of nowhere.

“Oh, uh, he thinks I go to an international school that my dad managed to get me into,” he told her. “It’s not exactly a lie, but it still sucks that I can’t tell him the real truth,” he said, sadly.

CeCe looked down, nodding sympathetically. She didn’t realize her question would make him sad and she kind of wished she kept her mouth shut.

“But hey!” he said quickly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t think Kageyama would believe me even if I could tell him. And honestly, I don’t think he thinks I’m smart or creative enough to come up with any of this on my own. He’d probably think I just got it from a movie or something,” he chuckled awkwardly.

“I’m sorry, Shoyo,” she said sincerely.

He brushed off her apology with a wave. “It’s not a big deal, really,” he smiled, though it wasn’t as bright as usual.

They walked silently for a while. CeCe thought about how Shoyo didn’t find out he was magical until he was thirteen and how he used to lead a completely different life. Since she was raised magical, she couldn’t imagine how it would feel to have her life totally uprooted like that. From stories that Grams would tell, she knew that it was really difficult to maintain relationships with people who didn’t and couldn’t know about magic. She felt terrible that Shoyo had to keep so much of himself hidden from his friend, especially when they seemed like they were pretty close. Under the sympathy she felt for her friend, she was also a bit irritated with him. If she had known that he was alone for most of the summer, she would have asked him to hang out more. It’s not like she couldn’t orb to Japan and be back in time for dinner. But she felt like she had already done enough damage, so she kept that irritation to herself. A few more moments of silence passed between the two before Shoyo broke it, saying he was going to use the rest room and he’d meet up with her at the library.

CeCe continued down the hall, hoping that she didn’t upset Shoyo as badly as she was afraid she had. She pulled out her phone to distract herself. She had a text from her dad. “Hey, sweetheart,” It read, “We’re going to be having family dinner tonight at the house. Your Aunt Melinda is back in town.” As her eyes scanned over Melinda’s name, she felt her body being pulled forward. She blinked and when she opened her eyes again, instead of being in the hallway at school, she was standing in her attic in front of the Book of Shadows. It was open to a page with “Akuma” written across the top with Chinese characters underneath it, but she couldn’t see any other details on the page.

“I don’t know, kid. I’d ask Grams about that. She would know better than me,” Melinda told her.

CeCe felt herself walk into something large and hard. The “object” grunted. The noise dragged her back to the present. “I am so sorry,” she apologized, “I-,” she was going to explain, but the words died on her lips as she looked up and was met with a cold, hard glare. It was a demon boy. He was at least a foot taller than her. Based on how it felt when she walked into him, she inferred that he was in excellent shape. He had wavy, black hair and cold, black eyes. The rest of his features were hidden beneath a cloth mask, except for two moles stacked on top of each other over his right eyebrow. Under other circumstances, she might find them unique and maybe even attractive. But right now, she was intimidated. She felt herself shrink under his gaze.

“Watch it, witch” a masculine voice said from her right. She didn’t look to see who it had come from.

Neither CeCe, nor the boy she walked into said anything. He continued to glare at her and she stared back, not wanting to let her guard down, but she also felt frozen, like she couldn’t look away.

“Come on, Omi,” a feminine voice whined. She tugged on the demon’s right hand. He pulled it from her grasp, his glare shifting from CeCe to the other girl. Finally, he stepped around CeCe and continued down the hall with his group.

“Witches, man,” The other boy said.

The dark-haired demon ignored him though and chose to address the other girl instead.

“I have repeatedly asked you not to touch me,” he told her, bitterly.

CeCe remained in the spot he left her. Her mind swam as she tried to process everything that happened in the last two minutes. On top of the confusion she felt about the premonition, she was mortified. She felt betrayed by her powers and body. How could she keep moving if she wasn’t mentally present?

“Are you okay, CeCe?” Shoyo asked as he jogged up behind her. His voice helped shake her out of her internal struggle.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she responded. “Demons are rude as hell.” Shoyo snorts at her joke, that being enough to convince him she was alright. She offered a small smile and they continued to the library.

Kenma and Chloe were already there by the time they arrived. They sat together at a round table in the far corner of the room. Chloe seemed anxious, nerves rolling off her in waves CeCe could feel from across the room, even without being an empath herself. Kenma did his best to ignore her, opting to focus on a game instead.

“Have you had any premonitions today?” Chloe asked CeCe before she could even sit down and say hello.

CeCe was taken aback by her cousin’s question. How’d she know? she thought to herself.

“Uh… about what?” she asked out loud. She felt Kenma’s gaze shift to her curiously.

“Celine!” Chloe shouted impatiently, the outburst earning her dirty looks from students at surrounding tables. She lowered her voice when she continued, “It’s her first day and I’m so worried about her. I haven’t had any either.”

“Well, if you haven’t had a premonition about her I’m sure that means she’s fine right?” CeCe reasoned.

“No, that doesn’t mean she’s fine at all!” Chloe raised her voice again.

The boys stayed quiet and let CeCe try to calm her cousin.

“Chloe,” CeCe said in her most soothing tone. “I’m sure Celine is fine. It’s not like she’s never been here before and she knows how to get to us if she needs help.”

Her words were not enough to douse Chloe’s anxieties.

“She’s never been here with demons before! I’m gonna go find her,” Chloe vanished in pinkish-red light, not even bothering to get up before beaming to find her sister.

With that discussion over, Kenma piped up.

“So, what was it about?” he asked CeCe nonchalantly.

“What was what about?” she asked, confused about what he meant.

“Your premonition. You only asked, ‘about what.’ You never said you didn’t have one.”

In their four years of friendship, CeCe still couldn’t get over how perceptive Kenma was. It was kind of unnerving at times, how he knew so much more than other people did just by paying more attention to small details.  

She sighed. “Uh, I was in the attic at home, talking to my aunt. Nothing special,” she shrugged.

Kenma seemed satisfied with that answer until Shoyo asked, “Is that why you walked into that guy, CeCe?”

She groaned. She hadn’t realized Shoyo saw that much of the unfortunate interaction.

Kenma snorted “You walked into someone? Who?” he asked.

Shoyo answered for her, “Those really tall Japanese guys. The demonic ones. I was afraid they were gonna kill her.”

“Oh yeah, those guys are jerks,” Kenma agreed. “You okay?” he asked CeCe.

“Just a bit humiliated,” she huffed. She was jealous of Chloe’s premonitions. They were more like flashes of the future instead of actually going there. Chloe also had way more control of them than CeCe did. She didn’t walk into people in the middle of them, for instance. CeCe searched for a way to change the subject and remembered the text from her dad. “Do you want to come to family dinner tonight?” she asked both boys.

“No thanks, I can only take so much of your family,” Kenma declined.

“That’s fair. What about you, Sho?”

“Oh, I would, but I have plans with Kageyama later,” the red head answered.  “Thank you, though,” he said with a smile.

“Sure,” she smiled back.

The three students settled into a comfortable silence, only breaking it to ask each other a question about assignments they were working on. CeCe tried desperately to not think about the debacle in the hallway. She couldn’t help but think about her premonition though. How random was that? CeCe hated the visions that gave her no context. She wondered if it would have been longer if she hadn’t walked into that guy.

Shoyo’s voice interrupted her thoughts when he asked Kenma what a certain kanji meant. Cece knew the book would be written in perfect English when she looked at it, but she glanced at the page anyway. That was another cool thing about Magic School, and what made it so easy for them to educate magical students from all over the world. Students heard and read their native language no matter where they were within the plane. Sometimes it tripped CeCe out to think that when she spoke to Kenma, for example, he heard Japanese even though she was speaking English and vice versa.

A nagging feeling ate at CeCe as she thought about her premonition and the characters on the page in the Book of Shadows. “Hey Kenma? Do you know anything about who or what Akuma is?” she asked when he was done answering Shoyo’s question.

Kenma’s face fell slightly and he was quiet for a moment. He cleared his throat before he answered, “Uh yeah, he’s a demon, based in Japan. He mostly works above ground now. He seems to be heavily involved with organized crime these days.”

Cece felt like there was something he was leaving out, but she didn’t pry. She knew he would tell her when he was comfortable enough, he always did. “That was part of my vision,” she explained. “I was looking at his page in the book.”

Kenma nodded his understanding and the group fell back into silence, working on their various assignments. Around ten minutes before the end of the period, Chloe returned. She walked back to their table and sat down. She looked both flustered and slightly more relaxed.

“I embarrassed her.” She said sheepishly.

“What did you do?” CeCe asked accusingly.

“I may or may not have beamed directly into her classroom.” Chloe admitted after a moment of hesitation. “I got chewed out for interrupting her professor’s lecture on exposure. Then he used me as an example.”

“Is Celine okay?” CeCe asked, more for Chloe’s sake than Celine’s.

“Oh yeah, she’s fine. She probably just won’t talk to me for the rest of the day,” Chloe told her. “What classes do you guys have next?”

Shoyo answered first and told her he had Wiccan History. Chloe smiled brightly.

“So does Celine!” Of course she memorized her sister’s schedule as well as her own. “Would you keep an eye on her for me?” she asked him very seriously as she ran a hand through her thick, dark hair, her smile turning saccharine.

Shoyo cleared his throat and agreed, a hint of pink tinged his cheeks.

“You are the best, Shoyo,” Chloe praised, while she made direct eye contact with the younger boy. Her soft, brown eyes bored into his. Shoyo’s blush deepened and he looked like his brain might short circuit.

“Chloe,” CeCe said her name like a warning.

Chloe tore her eyes from the bright red, red head and turned her focus back to CeCe and Kenma.

“What about you guys?” she asked, tone shifting slightly. Kenma rolled his eyes at her.

“Kenma and I have something called “Tactical Magic,”’ CeCe said. “Whatever that is.”

Chloe scrunched up her face. “What the hell? Are they gonna use you guys to raise an army or something?”

“I guess we’ll find out,” CeCe shrugged.

Kenma and CeCe walked to class together silently. He always found it easier to keep his mouth shut around Chloe, only speaking to her when she asked him something directly, but this seemed different. CeCe wondered if there was some lingering tension from the Akuma conversation.

They walked into a large, airy classroom. It was located in one of the towers, so the far wall of the room was curved, making it a semi-circle. All the desks were pushed to either side of the room leaving a large open space in the middle. They were instructed to remain standing as they entered. Murmurs from other students filled the room. They mostly asked each other if anyone knew what this class was about.

The bell rang and two men came to stand in front of the class. CeCe recognized one as Takeda, a whitelighter and the school’s counselor of sorts. He had curly, black hair and brown eyes. He wore thick framed glasses and a soft, approachable expression. The other man was almost the total opposite of Takeda. He was taller and broader than the counselor and had blonde hair that was held out of his face by a headband. He had multiple piercings in his ears. Overall, he looked like someone you might cross the street to avoid. This guy was clearly a demon.

The demon spoke first. “Hello, welcome to Tactical Magic. My name is Ukai and I’m going to be your instructor for this class.”  Takeda cleared his throat from beside his counterpart. Ukai rolled his eyes and added, “Takeda is here in case you wanna drop the class or if you end up with emotional trauma, I guess.”

“I’m here to make students more comfortable,” Takeda corrected.

“Right,” Ukai snorted. He inhaled to continue speaking but acknowledged a student who had their hand raised instead. “Yes?”

“What is this class about?” the student asked.

“I was getting to that before I was interrupted,” Ukai told the student. “This course is to evaluate and develop how you fight against the opposite side.”

A beat of silence filled the classroom before a wave of voices crashed over them, all varying degrees of confusion and outrage in their tone.

“So, you’re teaching them to kill us?” a voice asked from behind CeCe. She couldn’t tell whether its owner was a witch or a demon. It didn’t matter at this point.

CeCe looked at Kenma, his amber eyes slightly wider than usual. She took his hand and squeezed gently. He looked at her, his features relaxing slightly.

“What do the Elders have to say about this?” another student asked.

Concerned chatter from other students continued to fill the room until Takeda finally regained control.

“Alright, enough,” he said sternly, surprising some students with his tone. “The Elders developed this course to provide a controlled environment to teach you all to defend yourselves outside of this plane. This is meant to keep you safe. All of you,” he said pointedly.

The students processed the whitelighter’s words and the meaning behind them. They eventually settled down and silence fell over the room. Ukai glanced gratefully at Takeda before he spoke once again.

“Today we are going to do an exercise to get a feel for your individual strengths and weaknesses,” he said, getting right into it. “I’ve already paired you off, one demon or warlock, one witch. You’ll have two minutes to do your best to subdue your partner. Powers and hand to hand combat are both allowed, but no weapons.” Then his tone changed, “It really is a shame they don’t allow them anymore. They used to have a bitchin’ selection.”

Takeda shot him a weird look.

Ukai cleared his throat and called the first pair of names. The two students walked to the center of the room and faced each other from opposite ends of the open space. The instructor set a timer for two minutes and told them to begin. When their two minutes were up, the round ended with the demonic student as the winner. The next two names were called. This went on for a couple of rounds, sometimes the witch won, sometimes the demon. As CeCe watched the other students spar, she tried to come up with a plan of her own. She decided that simply freezing her opponent and anything they threw at her would be sufficient. Another pair of names were called. When their round began, CeCe looked over at Kenma again. He seemed like he had relaxed, his hands in the pockets of his hoodie, watching the other students spar. Kenma shouldn’t have any trouble with this exercise. He may have seemed unassuming, but he was one of the most powerful students at Magic School. He had the power of thought projection, meaning he could create images and show whatever he wanted to whomever he wanted. It made him formidable, but also put him in danger.

“Kozume, Kuro, you’re up,” Ukai called.

Kenma walked to the center of the room with his hands still in his pockets. His opponent, Kuro looked familiar to CeCe. She had seen him around a lot in the last year, hanging out with Bokuto. She was pretty sure he was a warlock. He was tall and had jet black hair that he wore in an interesting style. He looked like one of those “scene” kids Aunt Melinda used to talk about.

“Begin,” Ukai told them as he started their timer.

“Let’s see what you can do,” Kuro said in a rather cocky tone.

Before he could take even a half a step forward, or blink, Kuro’s eyes glazed over. He was already trapped in Kenma’s illusion. Kenma stood the same way he had been before the match started, hands in his pockets, looking at Kuro. Neither of the boys moved for the full two minutes. Kuro couldn’t have fought his way out of the projection if he wanted to. Finally, the timer went off and Kenma let Kuro free.

“Uh, okay… Kozume, good job I guess,” Ukai said, not really sure about what just happened.

Kenma walked back to CeCe and reclaimed his place beside her. Kuro stared after him with glassy eyes for a moment before he too walked back to where he had been standing in the group.

Cece leaned closer to Kenma. “What did you show him?” she whispered.

“The meadow,” he answered simply.

Ah, the meadow. She thought back to the first time Kenma had shown her the meadow when they were fourteen. It was gorgeous. Bright sunshine and pretty wildflowers surrounded her. There was a crystal-clear brook that babbled in the distance. The main attraction, however, was the guy that joined her. It was that one guy from that one band. The cute one with the swoopy hair. She smiled to herself as she thought about it now. That was the point of the meadow, to show you your greatest love or biggest crush and distract you with them. Kenma couldn’t see who they were though. To him it was just a white figure.

CeCe was jolted out of her happy memory by Ukai’s voice calling her name.

“Halliwell, Sakusa, your turn.”

A nervous pit that wasn’t there before settled in CeCe’s stomach. She walked to the center of the room and saw her opponent. Dread washed over her as she looked into the same cold stare from earlier. It was the boy from the hallway. The one she walked into. Well, this should be interesting, she thought to herself.

“Halliwell, huh? This should be interesting,” his deep voice rumbled through her, mirroring her sentiments.

[incarnateirony]

In what season and episode did you realised that Destiel went from subtext to actual text?

Difficult question really. I don’t exactly have a magic switch of some weird personal set goalpost I have, and frankly, wasn’t even really a shipper, just defended shippers, until... 13.5/6. I think I started slipping after 12.19 because I’m not a moron, I don’t live under a rock, I have eyes and know what the fuck a mixtape means to Gen X. But I kept it at arms reach because even Carver era was so totally subtextual-- atop all the stuff that got cut S10 after the S9 blowout, I didn’t exactly want to invest myself as much as point out shippers weren’t crazy for seeing what they saw, especially S8/9+ and even prior the resonance of the hero’s journey over our entire human civilization and historical othering of queerness made earlier readings or notices of it completely fair even if not really like, directional by the crew?

But to begin, Carver era was when I saw /intentful and meritful construction of the body of text, via subtext, to subtextually tell a story with classic queer coding./ Because a lot of what this fandom calls queer coding makes me want to hide my face behind a quantum hole of facepalms and is often like, pretty much the reverse of what should be advocated or considered. All those retro old “he’s been written as queer from S1″ make me want to kick puppies or something because oh my god it’s Not Good, most of the content there is Very Bad And Hugely Problematic, and it’s an attempt to retroactively prove what old canon was doing without any substance.

Carver era was the shift to substance, but silent substance. Subtext that’s genuinely thematically scaffolded into the storyline in a way that while the events themselves were largely cued on subtext, consideration of that subtext was critical to understanding the full body of text and people that refused to grow into and adapt with that text as the tone shifted are the ones that got more and more confused and angry.

Dabb era was the threshold crossing into (often low-visibility) text. Fandom intentionally arguing points that require complete removal from social structures (which is everything from regional meanings of major symbols, social codes, language, or why-letters-mean-things) doesn’t mean shit doesn’t mean what it means. A mixtape isn’t subtext any more than getting on one knee and popping open a box is subtext even if they don’t verbalize the words. We know what these fucking things mean and anyone who doesn’t is in DESPERATE need of going outside and experiencing the real world before making any kind of social commentary on a body of text.

When it comes to dialogue text, Last Call is where Bi Dean or at least Queer Umbrella Dean was textualized. Again, it doesn’t matter if people don’t understand the long argued history that was put to bed about repeat sexual encounters with men, it doesn’t matter what the gender of the other triplets were, literally none of that matters. It doesn’t matter if the person understands it. It doesn’t matter if they know their queer culture enough to know their arguments were already buried. It is what it is.

There’s this disillusionment that unspoken physicalized shit like kissing or sex, or verbalized ones like “I love you,” but “I love you, in a gay way, specifically and only you, and want to be romantic with you” because every other statement of the like so far has people crying or arguing about it as not enough either. 

These things are nice, but it is not the only way to deliver a textual romance. These are things we want and deserve, and people aren’t wrong for wanting them, the only wrong comes in deleting other text because it isn’t the style of text they want. 100% unhelpful.

Text in AV is complex. No matter how decontextualized people try to pretend this all is, throwing pasta at the wall and calling it an argument worth validating, AV media study doesn’t just incorporate social codes on shit like dialogue -- though anyone that applies those social codes wouldn’t be arguing anyway, as per my old post on that -- but visual language and TV literacy are a long studied topic and are just as relevant as understanding of textual/verbal language and having textual literacy. People trying to eschew these in the interest of favoring fanspaces to try to keep them equal within the canon, which is NOT what fandom space equality is supposed to be about, is just... lol. 

When that soap opera reporter that doesn’t even watch the show wandered in commenting on the full mise en scene of the 15.03 breakup being classical “Dark Point in the Romance” framing, that’s not subtext. In a book, characters aren’t running around on a blank canvas. Their environments are the text. 

What people may draw symbolically out of an environment varies, and if someone’s /interpretation/ holds up, that’s fine. But being able to digest the entire presentation of a work, that is to say, to read an entire scene in a book and understand their setting and the relevance of that setting is simply a form of text. And when literal fucking randos can spot classic cinematography, it’s time to consider what the full cinematic framework is telling you both in incremental minutiae of texts and in the full body of work.

So basically, I acknowledged lowkey text based on the most basic understanding of social codes, by 12.19, even if I was still kinda eyerolling about it. By 13.5/6, Castiel returned to Dean in something later echoed by Eileen for the zoom shot, but the rest of the arrangement was verbatim identical to the original ending of Swan Song with Lisa, with the only difference being “Never too late” wasn’t a verbal line, but an entire sound track they applied to highlight the scene.

Despite the Swan Song parallel ending reactives went up in arms about the fact that they weren’t having big romantic moments anymore and kinda failed to wrap braincases around the fact that the endgame reunion that was literally the ORIGINAL endgame shot, which ALSO didn’t include physicality (in fact, the text read, “this isn’t sexual at all. He’s a lost soul, and she’s his home” in the script for Lisa), and this dumbass fandom would go “SEE PROOF THAT MEANS THE TEXT MEANS IT WASNT SEXUAL AND HE JUST BECAME BEST FRIENDS THAT WAS HER BEDWARMER MAYBE SHE HAS COLD FEET AT NIGHT” and that’s not how this fucking WORKS. Common sense is NOT removed from fucking discussion and what sense is applied needs to be levelly-- again, social codes.

So at 13.5/6 I had considered it textually paramount to the original endgame arrangement. S14 was just... blatant ass domesticity. Dean got his happy ending. He had his family. He got his win, his everything. They spoke frequently in the kitchen -- only vaguely over cases, more slapping around idioms, eyerolling over barbarous eating, and occasionally discussing how to raise their son. In fact, if you look at non-research-non-casework S14 kitchen scenes I’m gonna let you sit there and map out what all those domestic moments in the heart of the kitchen was, minding 13.5/6. 

It was something gained. It was their life. And it was something to lose. 14.18 already advert framed it, we all saw it. Troubled family. People delete history of what is connected where to pretend “we” is vague or makes the romance any less of a canon piece and lmao guys 

And season 15 is their year long run where they’re spearheading a huge part of the plot and will be a critical final resolution.

Speaking of 13.5/6 and social codes, anyone remember that Jack hadn’t met Dave Mather and looked at one nonphysical picture of them and recognized “he’s her boyfriend”? SOCIAL CODES MEAN SHIT GUYS.

So there’s no magic moment. There’s S8/9 coding and subtext. There’s S12′s tape and other elements -- tape is just the easiest to nail down but several through the year tbh -- there’s S13′s Never Too Late, and all things that followed that in waterfall. There’s S14′s established domesticity with Castiel having essentially moved into the bunker, something that wasn’t even entirely established in S12 yet even if he was more frequent there than Carver era.

Without social codes, I could argue that “Dean loves pie” doesn’t actually mean he loves pie. In fact, I could argue those letters mean nothing, because basic social codes are what even give words meanings. Without them these are just squiggly lines on a screen. If I eschew social codes, I could take a “love me some pie” line from Dean and say it means he fornicates with children and make long convoluded excuses around it instead of the observable fucking fact that Dean fucking Winchester likes goddamn pie.

Waiting for your perfect personally dreamed magic moment for a landmark to call text generally disregards the full body of the text and merit of the work. The amount of time and effort this FUCKING shipping fandom has put into -- even Destiel shippers -- bashing down and calling blatant ass text subtext because it’s not the text they want -- just because they want to argue with people that threw the logic baby out with the destiel bathwater they thought was dirty -- it’s fucking embarrassing tbqh. Imagine if people’s competitive fandom BS was muted how anyone here would be addressing this body of text.

Like. “After Carver directed Misha to play Castiel as a jilted lover in season 9, Cain through S10 escalated it into Castiel as Colette, which was confirmed by both the author and actors, seating him as a lover, as Sam was Abel the brother; by season 11, pining and connected hearts becomes the driving theme of the show, repeatedly denounced both in text and showrunner commentary that it wasn’t Amara that was that romance, and instead, a different one rose; by season 12, domestic arguments were many, mixtapes were shared, coming into rooms and playing people for things secretly stashed under pillows were a hinging plot moment, by season 13 he was the Never Too Late Big Win as a far more powerful version of Lisa, by season 14 Castiel moved in, by season 15 their giant sacred marriage euchartist ceremonies on repeat are driving the entire body of the season while overtly making the straight pairing a secondary parallel to the primary Dean and Castiel pairing by 15.09 such as the AU scene, or the ending where they mimicked the same phrase, truncated by physicality. But anyone viewing this text is an adult not competing for their preferred fandom playbox to be considered in the text, and had eyeballs, saw Sam and Eileen were clearly courting, flirting, and/or romantically engaged for a long time before this.”

Can we hope for the equality in that, sure.  I want that, sure. That doesn’t erase all the other modes of text before that though. 

But there, I just addressed 4 consecutive seasons of storytelling as its stands in the critical themes, without breaking down the dozens of independent scenes themselves that have already been analyzed to death and yall have scorched in your eyeballs by now like angels have prophet names. 

I’ve seen people desperately, desperately try to reinterpret this text, or this story structure, in inconsistent ways that fall short. They’re never held accountable for their entire shit falling flat on their face, they just keep building new shit that falls on its face too and keep using it as a base. People can *interpret* ~text~ however they want. Anyone that tells you that “true text is inarguable” is either an idiot or selling you something for your subscription to their blog. Anyone CAN make any jackass interpretation of anything they want. 

So sure. You can make some nonsensical explanation around every core theme their relationship is shadowed by, removing all social codes and context from basic elements understood by adult human beings natively, whatever. You can take 200 pages writing around it and degaying it. Generally when I see this, I see unhinged, incomplete writings with no central thread, just a thousand disembodied excuses that don’t even make a story. They’re just that. Desperate excuses. Years of it at this point. And they’re free to /interpret the text like that/ if they want. But that’s their /interpretation/ of a /text/ and as-above generally in /intentional, willful, conscious denial and erasure of the basic social codes we all understand./

Just because they /can/ warp the most left field interpretation doesn’t make it not text. If I pulled an “I don’t know I can’t english suddenly” and threw those codes out the window that doesn’t mean that the shit doesn’t mean the shit it means just because it’s inconvenient to me lmao

And this isn’t necessarily at you, Nonnie, I just feel the need to expand on this because any single time I don’t nail down these conversational stakes, someone breezes through and intentionally hotboxes the conversation to go down these very predictable manipulations and extremizations of the conversation that I really am far too tired to repeat the arguments raging in my mentions again, so I head ‘em off before the shit ever reblogs.

[americanahighways]

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Barbara Stephan is passionate about her music as well as spreading the gospel about the rewards, and risks, of a musical career.

Based in the Milwaukee, Wisconsin area, Barbara Stephan has made a name for herself for her sultry R&B voice and versatile styles as leader of the Barbara Stephan Band, as part of her current duet with singer/songwriter Peter Mack, and as a soloist.  She has performed with national artists such as Susan Tedeschi and Jon Paris.  During September 2019, she released her first CD, Motown-inspired Come on Over to Me, with her 10-piece backing band.

Among her many accolades are nominations for the Wisconsin Area Music Industry (WAMI) awards as 2020 Singer/Songwriter of the Year and, with the Barbara Stephan Band, 2020 R&B/Soul Artist of the Year.

Singing and songwriting are part of Barbara Stephan’s makeup and DNA.  While she has tried many paths in her life away from music both educationally and professionally, she has always been drawn back to her life’s blood of music willingly forgoing luxuries and making the sacrifices necessary to dedicate her life to music.

The accompanying photographs are from one of the last live performances of the Barbara Stephan Band in early March 2020 at the ACA Entertainment Original Music Showcase, before Wisconsin’s stay-at-home order took effect.  Her band is just beginning to perform again in limited public appearances.

Barbara has a lot on her mind these days about a lot of subjects—her music and influences; the headwinds aspiring musicians face as they embark on a musical career, including the discouragement they typically receive from family, educators and others; and the need for education in the business of being a musician.

Probably the most important tips Stephan would have for aspiring musicians interested in building a career would be to persevere and pursue the dream.

Barbara Stephan has found some interesting ways to use her creative talents during the current COVID-19 epidemic turmoil —including providing remote vocal lessons and spreading her wings as an aspiring fantasy author.

I had the pleasure of doing an extensive phone interview with Barbara Stephan during the height of Wisconsin’s governmental stay-at-home order.  Here are some edited highlights from our conversation.

AH:  When did you begin to sing?

Barbara Stephan:  I first discovered I could sing, or when people told me I could sing, in church when I was at a really young age.  Our family had just moved to small town of Afton in southern Wisconsin.  I started going to church when I was five.  By the time I was 7, they put me in the adult choir.  This really helped me develop my ear with singing harmonies at a very young age.

AH:  Describe your earliest influences.

BS:  My dad is a guitar player and was really into jazz.  As I got a little older, he was teaching me a lot of jazz and had me singing Ella Fitzgerald and Sarah Vaughn at a really young age.  I grew up listening to classics and standards like Louis Armstrong.  I became a huge Chrystal Gale and Patsy Cline fan.  That’s what I grew up listening to.  Singing along with my dad and playing the guitar.

I took jazz piano lessons up until about 16 years old.  Then I really wanted to start playing and singing more pop and rock—stuff my friends were listening to.  I always did appreciate jazz, but I started to get into Prince, The Cure, Wham, George Michael and Michael Jackson.  I’m a huge Michael Jackson fan.

AH:  When did you start performing professionally?

BS:  I actually had my first tavern gig with my dad at age 13.  I remember we had to fight with my mother because, oh my gosh, she did not want me hanging out in bars.  Which of course I understand!  That was when I started playing keyboards and singing in my dad’s band.

I started to branch off and left my dad’s band, singing in little jazz duos and combos.  When I was in my early 20’s, I auditioned for a band called Wall of Sound in Madison.  That was so much fun!  I was also listening to bands like Earth Wind and Fire, Tower of Power and Aretha Franklin, which was the kind of stuff they were doing.  That really satisfied my love for singing harmonies.  I was with Wall of Sound for a few years and then I moved to the Milwaukee area.  Later in my 20’s, I auditioned for a band called Cold Sweat and the Brew City Horns.

I was always working full time jobs and rehearsing and gigging on the weekends.  And I was working as an administrator for the Milwaukee Symphony Orchestra.  But I hated office work –sitting under fluorescent lights all day in my cubicle.  There was a lot about the job I loved, but a lot that I hated.

AH:  You have been influenced by many different styles, genres and performers from different backgrounds.  Your band feels like a “big band in a small package.”  How would you characterize your band’s music?

BS:  Definitely a soulful R&B-ish horn band kind of approach is the style I like the best.  Some of my songs lean more into specific genres than others.  Overall, I really love the style of music from old school Motown R&B horn section bands or a little bit older.  And then I try to infuse the music with a little bit of pop and a little bit of modern-day soul.

AH:  You also sing frequently in a duo with Peter Mack.  Contrast the style between your band work and your duo work.

BS: It’s different but it’s similar.  Peter mostly plays acoustic guitar.  We both have a penchant for blues-soul-R&B type music.  But we also do classic rock.  Most of the feedback we get from people who know us as a duo and then know my music is that we take all of the covers that we do, and we fashion them around a more soulful R&B style.  For instance, we’ll do Led Zeppelin, we’ll do an Ozzy Osborne song, we’ll do ZZ Top, Alice Merton, and DJ Aloopa, and more current stuff.  All of it lends itself to this soulful R&B approach.

What I love so much about my duo with Peter Mack and what I don’t necessarily experience with larger bands is that the arrangements are so free flowing.  Every week it’s something different and the solo sections can extend that forever.  This is the most artistically freeing place we both can be because it is just the two of us.  We have the freedom to do whatever we want – we can do every kind of style and genre.

AH:  You have been nominated this year for two WAMI awards, as Singer/Songwriter of the Year and your band as R&B/Soul Artist of the Year.

BS: I am very excited about that!  To be recognized by my peers on a local level is really exciting.  I’ve never been on the WAMI radar before.  It’s nice to see my name listed with all of these other Milwaukee and Wisconsin artists that I admire so much.

 AH:  What kind of challenges have you faced in your music career?

BS:  As I was coming up through the ranks as a teenager and in my early college days, people told me I would never make a living as a musician.  There was no support for me at all in what was a dream that seemed to be completely unachievable.  Back at that time, looking around, there was no one making a living as a musician.  So I floundered around from office job to office job and college to college.  I tried this degree and that degree, and I was so unhappy and languishing in this belief system that there was no way for me to make a living as a musician.  Knowing what I know now, that was completely untrue.  There are many avenues and many ways to make a living as a musician.

I did spend years living in studio apartments, paying pretty low rent and driving a cheap economical car in order to do what I wanted to do.  Marriage and children, and a big house and fancy cars and all of that stuff were not a part of my dream at that time.  Part of my dream was waking up whenever I wanted and performing when I wanted to perform and teaching other people to realize their musical goals.

AH:  What advice would you give to an aspiring young musician?

BS:  My overarching message to anyone thinking of a career in music is to do it if you absolutely have to do music.  If there is really nothing else that speaks to you, then do it.  A music career will challenge you at every level of your being.  If you are pursuing music because it’s what you must do, then make a commitment of potentially living in one room with few possessions.

My husband and I recently did a presentation about making a living as a musician for Career Day at Brookfield Central High School.  I have quite a few high school students in my studio.  We had a really long list of potential careers as a musician or ways to be involved in music, including being a teacher or being a hobbyist musician or a salon or a professional musician.  We have friends who are in a symphony orchestra who went that route.  If you want to practice violin for 8 hours a day, that’s amazing.  Go that route.  Or do you want to be Lady Gaga famous?  Set your goals.

The question I always ask high school students is about the climate they see currently.  What feedback are they getting from guidance counselors and educators and parents about what seems to be an unachievable dream.  I would say that 90% of them were being discouraged at every level from going into music.

But then there was one girl who raised her hand who said she was from a family of professional musicians who had a completely different angle and were very supportive of her.

It’s important to seek advice from people in the music industry.  What kids don’t understand, especially when they are being discouraged, is that being around people who have already made a living as a musician are the kind of people who are going to be able to tell you all of the different ways you can achieve a music career.  They will also give you encouragement and advice on how to succeed.

It might take you more work and effort than you ever thought you were capable of.  For any person who is going through entrepreneurship or going to be self-employed, this is probably going to take you a lot more time and a lot more effort than you could ever imagine.  But it’s going to challenge you in ways that will enrich you so much as a human being.

AH:  How are you maintaining your sanity in dealing with the COVID-19 pandemic and social distancing restrictions?

BS:  This has been quite a test for my husband, Mark Antoniewicz, and me.  We are working together professionally, and we just got married in November 2019.  While we are at the same time going from these extremes of being incredibly fearful.  You know, we have our days where we are totally despondent and fearful about what’s happening and we have our days where we are very hopeful.  In the meantime, I always wanted to do an online video-vocal series of lessons because I have so much to say about my own journey of being a singer.

I completed two videos that I sent to all my students to keep us connected and to give them a daily means of practicing all aspects of having a really healthy vocal technique.  I’ve always wanted to do online videos but felt I didn’t have the time.  Now I have nothing but time, so the online video vocal series is really exciting.

AH: In addition to your voice coaching, what other projects are you involved in?

BS: I am actually writing a book.  I am in the middle of the second draft.  It’s kind of a strange story.  The inspiration happened from a song that I wrote called “Willow.”  As a child, I was really attached to a beloved willow tree in our backyard.  As an adult, when that tree died, I couldn’t believe the grief I experienced.  I was completely unprepared for the emotional upheaval.  So I wrote this song and for some reason out of this song I began to have this vision involving the Baba Yaga and all of her wisdom.

The Baba Yaga is the old crone who lives in the woods who eats children.  She is the quintessential witch out of Russian folklore who lives in a hut with chicken legs for stilts.  She runs around in the forest in this chicken leg house and is a very scary intimidating character.  I started to have these visions and this story line began to come along of the Baba Yaga who appears to be monstrous, but who is here to tell the story that she has completely been misunderstood as have all of the monstrous characters in all of the stories.

Her message is that it is actually because of the monsters, and not in spite of the monsters, that humans evolved.  The Baba Yaga and other monsters like her are actually here for human evolution.  While it’s been their job to scare us, to make us hide under our beds and in our closets, this occurred to make us more aware of the fear within us so that we can eventually transcend the fear.  Without that fear, humans would not have the tools to evolve.

AH:  You have also been involved in promoting original music and musical talent.

BS:  Yes.  Matt’s role is as business owner and president of ACA and North Coast Management.  My role is to support him and his vision, which is to provide as much work and performance opportunities as possible for musicians. Because of the incredible quality and integrity of the people he has been able to surround himself with, I couldn’t help but want to be involved.  It feels really good to provide a sound structural foundation and provide every level of support as possible for musicians coming up through the ranks who want to pursue a music career.

AH: Will you try to reflect our current experiences during the COVID-19 crisis into any of your songs?

BS: I am working on a song about what I would really like to do right now, which is to get in the car and take a road trip to the mountains.  If I could hide away in the mountains until this is all over, that would make me really happy.  I would love to sequester myself in a mountain cabin somewhere and do a lot of self-reflection.  This poses a lot of questions like what would I do if my music career went away?  If everything we knew and loved and valued was stripped away from us, which has happened to countless millions of people throughout human history, how would I cope?  What would I do, who and what am I really, and what really does have value to me?

AH: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

BS: I would like to be doing what I am doing now, but on a larger scale, such as regional tours with my original band.  I would like to build more of an online presence.  I also want to write more music, including more show and television music.  Maybe another full album’s worth so that I have a show with all my best music.  I have a 2 hour show now, which is exciting, but I would like to write more music for it.

I don’t aspire to have a big touring gig—I have two step-kids now, I’m married and kinda rooted to where I am, which is wonderful and beautiful and amazing.  I wouldn’t mind going out for a few weeks at a time to smaller theaters—more intimate venues, regionally and then in different areas of the country.  My shows lend themselves very well to those places.

To find out more about Barbara Stephan, visit her website, barbarastephanmusic.com.  Barbara’s upcoming performances with her band as well as her duo work with Peter Mack are on her website, as well as at ACAEntertainment.com.

INTERVIEW:  Barbara Stephan: Passionate Soul-Infused R&B and an Inspiration to Aspiring Musicians @barbarastephanmusic @brookbillick #americanamusic Barbara Stephan is passionate about her music as well as spreading the gospel about the rewards, and risks, of a musical career.

[medproish]

Moments like this – when the collective rap community gets to see someone’s meteoric rise culminate into that world-stopping drop of a debut album – are rare but they make being a fan worth all the trouble. There’s nothing like being a part of something so big, even if your role is nothing more than perusing the Twitter timeline and going back and forth with followers about your individual opinions. A lot of people didn’t think Cardi B would make it to this moment. Maybe some even hoped that she wouldn’t. The Bronx native made the most seamless transition from social media star, to reality TV star, to rap star in history. But the key word in all of those phases of her career is star. Cardi has a quality and an essence that can’t be confined to any singular path. She’s a natural entertainer and we’re all here to enjoy the ride. That’s why the stakes for her debut album Invasion of Privacy are some of the highest in recent rap history.

The question now is, is Invasion of Privacy actually good? We’d been witnesses to Cardi’s growth with her Gangsta Bitch Music mixtape series, as she worked through the growing pains of finding her sound. It’s where she flexed her muscles on songs like “Foreva” and “Lick,” slowly transforming into an artist who now dominates Billboard charts. Known for her transparency and her ability to be completely unhinged, we were privy to her personal life in ways that became even too much for her. Invasion of Privacy is an honest debut from a rapper who built a brand on being “regular,” even if she’s not so regular anymore.

Noisey staff writers Lawrence Burney and Kristin Corry break down Invasion of Privacy track-by-track upon first listen, and here were their first impressions.

“Get Up 10”

Lawrence: “Went from making tuna sandwiches to making the news” is a rags-to-riches analogy that I can fully conceptualise. This is a textbook way to start a career-defining rap album. Cardi spends a quarter of the song reliving the days she had to get through to make it to this moment before making a Tee Grizzley by-way-of Meek Milly shift in gears. If you’re going to make a statement, you have to plant your flag firmly into the ground and stand on those words. Whether you live up to them or not is irrelevant for that brief initiation, but Cardi sends a convincing warning.

Kristin: I’m totally here for the “Dreams & Nightmares” feel of it, I just worry that she’s going to end up sounding like everybody but Cardi. It’s a great way to start a debut, and we’ve seen that these introspective intros work well. Cardi adapts well to whatever flow she wants to adopt for the moment. She owned Kodak’s flow on “Bodak” and is damn near a fourth Migo on “Drip.” I want to hear Cardi sound like Cardi. It’s admirable that she wanted to tap into what made Meek’s intro so good, but also feels like she sort’ve does a disservice to herself by trying to emulate that sound so much. I’m completely a fan of when the beat switches it up toward the end though.

“Drip”

Kristin: This isn’t a bad song, but I think I would have appreciated this more on Culture II.

Lawrence: This may be one of my least favourite Cardi B songs. I’d actually like less songs of her with Migos on it. The album would have been just fine without this.

“Bickenhead”

Kristin: Well Lawrence, you were right about the Project Pat sample. At a glance, I was hoping this was the track YG would be on. I’m sold on her flip of the song though. The best part about Cardi is her ability to redefine the labels society forces on her and make them her own. Now everybody’s Instagram caption is going to be “bickenhead,” which is dope because in 2001 that wasn’t the greatest thing for a woman to be called. The true test of a bop for me is if I spend more time singing it than I spend doing my makeup. This is going to pass with flying colours.

Lawrence: LONG LIVE TRIPLE 6 MAFIA. There’s really no way that Cardi could lose here by sampling Project Pat’s “Chickenhead” because what’s continuing to become abundantly clear is that anything produced by DJ Paul and Juicy J will defy generational barriers. I mean, Crunchy Black used to seem like a problem from time to time. But anyway, what Cardi is doing here is perfect because while she didn’t snag La Chat for this song like I wished, her list of ways to “pop the pussy” feels like an ode to another Chat classic in “Slob On My Cat.”

Kristin: We get it, Lawrence. Triple 6 til you die.

“Bodak Yellow”

Lawrence: We all obviously love this song. “Bodak Yellow” dominated the summer. I remember seeing Cardi perform this at Moma PS1 and it was the most congested crowd I’ve ever been a part of. Like, if something would have popped off that day, a minimum of ten people would have gotten trampled. Hearing “Bodak Yellow” in that setting, with that kind of collective excitement is one of my favourite hip-hop moments of all time. Within the context of the album, I like that it comes after “Bickenhead” because it keeps the high energy going, then it immediately shifts gears with “Be Careful.” That shows Cardi’s range.

Kristin: Every time the beat drops, I ask myself “Am I over this song?” Like clockwork, it still catches me the same way as it did the first time I heard it. I was worried that it may not fit well with the rest of the album, but I think it’s the opposite. “Bodak” was really able to set the tone for what we should’ve expected for her debut album, and I think it’s safe to say she’s delivered.

“Be Careful”

Lawrence: When this track first dropped, there was a lot of chatter about how different it is than “Bodak Yellow” but I’m not sure where people developed the notion that Cardi B is only capable of one kind of song. While everyone’s been screaming about their bloody shoes she’s been rapping over New Jack Swing beats and singing in Spanish on dancehall tracks. What’s also good about the song is that it feels like it could have worked during any rap era of the past 25 years. Cardi’s shedding layers of herself to share details of her relationship but also warning that she might not stick around for repeated trauma. Those kinds of songs have been staples for some time.

Kristin: I honestly really love this song. People are saying she shouldn’t be singing on the hook and that she’s offbeat, but honestly that’s apart of what I love about Cardi. Her delivery has always been a little clumsy, which makes it all feel a lot more real for me personally. The same people talking shit are the same people who would praise it if her male counterparts put this song out. If we’re being honest, “Be Careful” is better than A Boogie’s “Get to You” which both borrow from Lauryn Hill’s “Ex-Factor.” She had me at the Belly reference, but most importantly, it feels like New York in the summer. Real New York, not transplant New York.

My concern here though, is the talk about the reference track that was posted shortly after the single dropped. It’s no secret people have ghostwriters but I couldn’t help listen to the rest of the album wondering what she actually wrote. It’s probably also naive of me to think everyone writes everything, but it’s something to consider. Accusations of ghostwriters haven’t hurt Drake and shouldn’t hurt her either. The way her personal life has played out in front of us makes this song feel incredibly intimate, so if it’s true, hearing Pardison Fontaine on the reference track was a little disappointing. I want to believe Offset got her mad enough to the point where these are her words.

“Best Life”

Kristin: I’m stoked she got a Chance feature, but it sounds like he didn’t give his all on this hook. Have that same energy you had on Life of Pablo or any other project your attach your name to. The hook feels a little lazy coming from him, especially if we’re comparing it to his verse, which is as chipper as you get with Chance. When he says, “I work magic, I work magic, I work magic in my life,” I feel Pastor Chance coming back out, putting an anointing on me. If we’re talking about living our best life, let’s have higher energy.

Lawrence: I agree on Chance’s contribution on the hook. That’s especially apparent after the energy Cardi comes in with on her first verse. But, I do enjoy Chance’s verse a lot. Cardi’s tuna-to-TV analogy for “making it” was great but Chance came in with “‘Member my hands had ash like Pompeii,” and changed the game. This song’s value lies in Cardi’s openness about how being in the public eye has affected her. From the self-consciousness about her teeth before getting them fixed, to how meeting Beyonce is a marker of really arriving. Rappers open up about these struggles often but what makes it resonate more here is that we’ve been able to see Cardi take many of the steps that she’s mentioning.

Kristin: I agree. Listening to her say, “I never had a problem showing y’all the real me/Hair when it’s fucked up, crib when it’s filthy.” I can literally pinpoint the moments she looked like she rolled out of bed chatting to her fans, with no fucks given. It’s that transparency that make people really root for her. She’s the antithesis to the perfectly packaged persona people post on socials. We literally watched her grow from a local sensation to BARDI. I love this “Binderella” reference and sort of wish that was her album title.

“I Like It”

Kristin: Haha, Cardi really does search her name on Twitter. She definitely ran that “Yup, they call me Cardi B, I run this shit like cardio” tweet on here. And this is exactly what I meant on the Chance song, J Balvin and Bad Bunny came with energy! Treat it like it’s your song, don’t just give some leftover melodies.

Lawrence: This will be blasted at every party in New York City this summer and I cannot wait.

Kristin: Practicing my bachata as we speak.

“Ring”

Kristin: I just find it funny that people criticised her for singing her own hook on “Be Careful,” suggesting that Kehlani or SZA should’ve done the honour instead… Kehlani is on the hook of this and it’s not nearly as strong of a song. Now what?

Lawrence: This one is fine and I’ve accepted that I will probably be hearing it on the radio all the time.

Kristin: I’m not into it. If we’re going with the ghostwriter theory, I think this is the official “Offset song” but “Be Careful” was the smarter and catchier choice to capitalise on the drama. This is all speculation though.

“Money Bag”

Kristin: This is definitely the closest she’s gotten to something that’s felt similar to “Bodak.” If I had a dollar for every time I’ll see “I said babe, issa snack/He say it’s an entree” on Instagram this summer, my loans would be forgiven. Nodding to Plies and Beyonce in a hook is pretty much the perfect way to make sure the song is a hit on social media, and she knows that. All of her eccentric confessionals on Love & Hip Hop have been preparing us for this moment. She really stretches her voice for that it’s worth here. It’s the perfect amount of extra. Also, money bags in general is always a big mood. OKURR!

Lawrence: When the song first started, I thought I’d be skipping it within the first 30 seconds. But then Cardi hit a gear that took the song to a new level. Like you said, in flow, it does follow the footsteps of “Bodak Yellow” at points. But the range that Cardi spans in energy here pushes it further.

“Bartier Cardi”

Lawrence: I enjoy how ferocious Cardi gets with the flow on this song. It’s always felt like with this one, she had a point to prove and it worked. 21’s tone of voice alone is why his verse isn’t a complete wash but he didn’t bring his best to this one at all.

Kristin: I still enjoy this song and I think it does a good job of keeping the momentum of what could now be considered Cardi’s sound. I actually like 21 on here, regardless of the questionable things he says he does with hot sauce.

“She Bad”

Kristin: YG you were supposed to be on “Bickenhead!” I personally would’ve preferred Yo Gotti on this hook. Cardi’s definitely in her bag here and throwing some subliminals. So I expect this one to be making its rounds with speculation on who they’re aimed for. Of course they could be empty insults, but we know for women in hip-hop it doesn’t work like that. I’m crying at YG’s “Only Birkin, not Dooney & Burke” line. A few people listening just pushed their Dooney collection all the way to the back of their closet.

Lawrence: This is another one out of Three 6 Mafia’s book of flows. Like the majority of songs that came before it, “She Bad” has the potential to be a smash hit – if anything, it will be another mainstay at parties and clubs for the rest of this year. YG has an uncanny ability to make effective hooks while not saying very much. That gift, joined with the production’s tempo and Cardi’s flow make this one worth revisiting.

“Thru Your Phone”

Kristin: This hook is… interesting. Lana Del Rey vibes? But damn, this song is petty as hell. Did she really just say, “I’ma make a bowl of cereal with a teaspoon of bleach/Serve it to you like, here you go nigga bon appetit.” Okay, Eminem. This is the song I want to see a visual for the most. Show me Cardi cutting the tongues out of sneakers and smashing televisions.

Offset, watch your back bruh.

Lawrence: The lesson here is very, extremely clear. Guys: do not cheat. Unless you want bleach cereal.

“I Do”

Kristin: Two queens talking shit. I stan. It’s also cool as hell that we watched this collaboration materialise. The definition of “Twitter, do ya thing.” I sort’ve wish there was more to the album after this, considering “Bodak Yellow” and “Bardier Carti” were played to death. Disclaimer: If your text goes unanswered it’s because SZA and Cardi told me to do it.

Lawrence: I love this song (SZA, sing over more trap please!), but its energy begs for it to be somewhere in the middle of the album. Invasion of Privacy ending on this note makes it feel incomplete. I’m so amped that I’m ready to come down a bit before I dip out. But, in consideration of the album’s title, Cardi delivered. Historically, she’s given us a lot of access into her life on social media. And by her sharing her experiences in the kind of detail that she does, I’m left to interpret it as: “Y’all are already in my business, making speculations, so I might as well just be the one to bare it all. Here is my truth.” Isn’t that what we want from all of our artists? At least, the ones we want to remember? We want an invitation into their innermost feelings – no matter how that may eat away at them – in order for us to be able to feel connected to them.

Lawrence Burney and Kristin Corry are staff writers at Noisey.

This article originally appeared on Noisey US.

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