#and like this is still a 1917 song to me which just adds That many more connections to my AUs don't even @ me don't look at me I'm insane

[indiiglow]

Oh my god this video might just singlehandedly plunge me straight back into RDR2

[turtle-steverogers]

I Watched TWS for the Millionth Time So Let’s Over-Analyze This Shit

-TFA theme at the beginning 🥰 (that theme is so fuckin good)

-Sam’s lil jogging route around the Tidal Basin/Mall

-Steve being sassy , just as a general

-Steve’s sadness errands

-Sam relating to Steve on the soldier front and making him feel seen

-Just. Sam Wilson

-The way that Steve’s to-do list in the movie varies from country to country (For instance, the UK list has Sherlock instead of I Love Lucy and The Beatles)

-Also I wanna know Steve’s thai order

-The fact that this whole exchange is happening at 6:39 am

-Natasha drives with all the recklessness of a 16 year old that just got their license

-Stealth Suit Stealth Suit

-Steve deflecting Nat’s date suggestions

-Steve’s aversion for parachutes...reckless endangerment ✨

-Steve speaking/understanding at least a little french

-Tony having designed the Helicarriers to have arc reactor power instead of turbines because “he got a close up look at the turbines” in The Avengers 2012 when he got caught in them

-“This isnt freedom, this is fear” aka the embodiment of Steve’s character

-Steve’s exhibit being in the Air and Space museum even tho he flew a plane once and crashed it

-Bucky’s display having two different birth years (1916 and 1917. the correct one is 1917)

-In the little video of Steve and Bucky, Sebastian Stan was saying “We *are* friends” after the director told them to “act like friends” for that shot

-Steve acknowledging Peggy’s family and therefore acknowledging that their relationship with each other, while still close and special, is not romantic anymore and Peggy telling Steve to move on and start over wtf endgame

-The parallel of Peggy losing her memory as Bucky regains his

-Sam Wilson willing to show vulnerability and not being ashamed of his PTSD and treating Steve like any other attendee and hoping Steve will open up too if he sees that it’s okay to

-Steve’s face after “it was like I was up there just to watch” cuz he gets it and both sam and him had to watch their other half fall

-“What makes you happy?” “I don’t know”

-The Winter Soldier theme is just Bucky’s scream pitched different and made to sound mechanical because Henry Jackman wanted it to sound like a man trapped in a machine

-Why is Steve a lucky bastard that has his own laundry machine

-Steve leaving his apartment building after Sharon points out the music and then SCALING THE SIDE OF HIS OWN BUILDING AND CLIMBING IN THROUGH HIS WINDOW LIKE CAN YOU IMAGINE SEEING CAPTAIN AMERICA JUST CLIMBING INTO HIS APARTMENT THROUGH HIS WINDOW ONE NIGHT

-STEVE’s APARTMENT I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS (i might make a separate post on that)

-The fact that “A Long, Long Time” is playing when he sees Bucky for the first time in the future and the song is about lovers reuniting after the war i’m not saying it’s gay but i am

-He calls Fury “Nick” which really indicates theyre not close in the slightest

-Steve is excellent in adapting under pressure (him immediately catching on and using Fury’s code story: “who else knows about your wife?”)

-Steve is Awful at lying but hes also Excellent at lying

-How tf did Steve get the flash drive in the vending machine without the vending machine dude noticing i-

-“Captain Rogers” “Neighbor >:(“ petty little shit

-Steve’s observation skills are A+++++ as we can see in the elevator scene

-More reckless endangerment like imagine just going through your work day and captain america falls through the ceiling

-Steve stole someones gym clothes after escaping SHIELD. let that sink in

-Natasha has about a billion masks on at all times (“I only act like i know everything, rogers” “the person that programmed this was slightly smarter than me. slightly” “the truth isn’t all things to all people all of the time”) also she’s quite insecure, especially when it comes to being perceived as a good, trustable person

-Meanwhile, Steve’s consistently himself even if it costs him

-Bucky trained Natasha in the Red Room (at least in the comics) so theres a good chance she made the connection between him and Steve and withheld that information

-The honeymoon in New Jersey😭😭

-Steve and Nat both have very different, but entirely valid approaches to situations: Steve’s is that of a tactiction, Nat’s is that of a spy’s. We see this in the scene at Pentagon City Mall

-Steve’s looking for someone with shared life experience and bucky has that

-Bucky killed JFK

-When Zola tells him that his death and life both amount to that of a zero sum, he punches the screen with his bare fist, not his shield, indicating just how much that upset him

-Pierce offers Bucky milk cuz he knows “the asset” can’t refuse or accept offers. He’s taunting him

-Sam drinks orange juice straight from the bottle and also doesnt refrigerate his mustard. There’s also a baseball trophy in his apartment so,,,,, baseball player sam anyone?

-Sam is also a gem who immediately helps out Steve and Nat with no judgement in his tone so they don’t feel ashamed

-Nat straightened her hair somewhere in Sam’s house

-“Cuz thats really not your style, Rogers” “you’re right, it’s not” *rubs sitwell’s arm* “it’s hers”

-Steve and Nat banter Steve and Nat banter

-Sam is just *clenches fist* so cool

-Nat immediately knows where Bucky’s gonna shoot when he lands on the Sam’s car and later she knows how to affectively fight him best because he trained her so she knows his fighting style

-Steve alone saying “Bucky?” was enough to break Bucky’s conditioning the slightest bit

-Sam met Steve like 36 hours ago and he’s already being arrested and made into a government fugitive with him and it won’t be the last time

-Steve is the only one entirely restrained

-“Even when I had nothing I had Bucky”

-Everyone meets Sam and is just like “aight let’s trust him with the highest clearance security information”

-Steve looks super nauseous all through the scene where Rumlow is handcuffing him and later when he says, “he looked right at me, like he didn’t even know me” he sounds sick and choked up

-Steve carries a lot of weight on his shoulders

-Steve’s “Bucky?” after the highway battle and Steve’s “Bucky?” in Bucky’s memory in the Vault Scene being different (in Bucky’s memory, he looks more heartbroken)

-Sebastian’s acting. Just all of it. And the way Bucky just opens his mouth for the mouth guard before he gets wiped....heartbreaking

-Steve realizes an organization that was meant to protect the people has become its own antithesis so hes like “aight. get rid of it” damn that’s the right mindset right there

-In the memory scene after Sarah’s funeral, Steve is so out of it and distressed, that he can’t find his key but Bucky immediately knows exactly where it is and what he’s lookin for

-Bucky was vain as shit and also had money: tailored suit, hair w shit ton of brylcreem in it

-The big breakfast Steve had was at Sam’s house

-The whole scene on the helicarrier between Steve and Bucky is incredible here are some highlights: Steve never backing down from a fight until it’s Bucky he’s fighting, Steve dropping the shield for him, Steve being ready to die if living means he’s living in a world where Bucky’s alive and doesnt remember him

-Their acting in that scene is so genuine and heartbreaking i can’t- i can’t-

-Steve’s got a comm i’m so chances are Nat, Sam and Maria can hear a portion of what’s going down on the helicarriers

-“I’m with ya to the end of the line” is basically “til death do us part�� so the equivalent of wedding vows between Bucky and Steve is what ultimately broke Bucky’s conditioning

-When bucky fell, steve didn’t jump after him but when Steve fell, bucky went after him even tho he’s brainwashed. don’t think about steve’s guilt surrounding that. youll only get sad

-Bucky waited until Steve took a breath to leave him

-Sam waited by Steve’s side in the hospital

-In the end credit scene, Bucky and Steve originally were supposed to make eye contact, but the writers didn’t want it established that Bucky remembered Steve until CW

----

Every time I watch it from here on out, I’m gonna add a lil more as I notice hehehe

[libsterslobsters]

Celebration Day

Summary: Bucky and the Reader's long-awaited wedding day is just around the corner. The only trouble is, with Pepper Potts serving as wedding planner, it's a little more elaborate than either of them had imagined. Sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands and create your perfect out of what's around you.

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x fem!enhanced!Reader

(Reader sees bits and pieces of the future at random, understands all languages, and is also a super soldier)

Warnings: Fluff, angst, swearing

Author's note: As always, the reader's name is never mentioned so that this can be read as a self-insert, but when I write this character, I imagine her as a Violet. Also, the song at the end of the fic can be anything you like, but I wrote it with Unforgettable by Nat King Cole in mind.

*************************************************

“Whoa.” Bucky doesn’t say anything, but as he takes in the huge stone building that, according to Pepper, they’ll be getting married at in two weeks’ time, he’s almost certain his eyes have gone as big as his fiancee’s. What the actual fuck? They could fit a small army inside this place.

“Is this the right place?” He’s half-way hoping she’ll say no, it was a big joke, but with a grimace, she nods.

“That is, if she sent us the right address. If not, it’s pretty remote here….” She trails off, biting at her lip.

“Does Pepper know that between the two of us, we can count the number of people we call friends on our fingers-”

“And the ones we’d actually want around to watch us make a life-long commitment to each other is even smaller? Yeah, I mentioned it.”

That’s what he was afraid of. Despite having been through some of the most intense situations known to man (fighting Thanos, anyone?), as he pulls the door closed behind him, his palm starts to sweat. Logically, he knew giving Pepper the go ahead to plan as she saw fit without any input from either of them (she did insist on footing the bill after all, so being particular would be ungrateful) meant that things would get more elaborate than he’d feel comfortable with, but this is completely out of hand.

“I’m starting to think that waiting until two weeks before the day of to take a look at things may have been a mistake.”

He chooses not to add his two cents to that (a fucking huge one, on both their parts). It turns out to be the right decision because, a huge bouquet of… are those lilies… in her hands, Pepper emerges from a side door.

“Good, you both found the place.” Yeah, it was kinda hard to miss. It’s a literal castle! “Isn’t it just beautiful?” The high-powered executive is gushing in a way that’s usually reserved for the first time seeing a great work of nature, like the Grand Canyon or possibly Niagara Falls. Not… whatever the hell this is.

“It’s very eye-catching.” The grip on his hand increases to where it’s almost painful, and he glances over at her. “Right?” In other words, don’t just stand there. Say something.

“Yeah. It’s…” Huge. Kind of reminds him of a medieval palace that would have a secret torture chamber down bellow. Decadent, but not in the “This is really great chocolate cake” kind of way. “...really something.” If that look is anything to judge from, he’s definitely in the dog house tonight… which, oddly enough, means the dog will probably spend the night cuddled up to her on his side of the bed.

Fortunately, Pepper seems not to have noticed that he’s less than enthusiastic about her choice of venue (either that, or she’s assumed that ‘vaguely unsociable’ is just his natural state), because she beams at the woman on his arm.

“Of course, it’ll look much different the day of. There will be floral arrangements in every window and…” She goes on, but he’s stopped listening, too busy trying to calculate how many people can fit in this auditorium alone.

“Any questions?” Pepper peers between both of them. He should really read the room and say no thanks, it all sounds great, but he actually is wondering about something.

“Yeah, I have one. What’s the final tally on the guest list looking like?”

“We’re standing at around 500.” 500… does he even know that many people? Scratch that; between the two of them, do THEY know that many people?

“Wow.” He glances at the woman next to him. Yeah, that’s a fake smile if he’s ever seen one. “That’s quite a turn-out.”

Pepper says something else, but he doesn’t hear it past the buzzing in his ears. It’s only when he feels a tug on his hand that he realizes they’re supposed to follow Stark’s widow out of the room.

As soon as they’re out of earshot, she turns to him, wearing a worried frown. “You okay there, Buck?”

He nods. “Yeah, but is it too late to go with your idea? Just go to the courthouse and sign a paper?”

She sighs, a rueful smile on her face. “I think that ship has sailed. Sorry.”

“That’s okay.” She deserves the best, and if Pepper has anything to do with it, this wedding will be just that. He can deal with it. It’s just for a few hours, after all.

“Does this mean I get to pull out the ‘I told you so’?” It’s a joke, meant to lighten the mood. He knows this, so he takes the bait.

“Yeah, Doll. You get a free pass.”

___________________________________________________________________________________

“How’s it coming?” She’s honestly not sure how to answer Shuri’s question. In traditional “Say Yes To The Dress” fashion, her female friends are all gathered outside the dressing room doors waiting for her to step out in the gown Pepper had designed specifically for her. The only trouble is, she’s never felt more out-of-place in her life.

It’s a beautiful dress, highlighting every single positive aspect of her body. The shade of ivory works well with her skin tone, and the material is cool against her skin. She looks exactly like a picture from a bridal magazine with her hair still styled from a trial run of that and makeup earlier today. Perfect… but not like herself.

Shaking her head, she tells herself she’s just not used to looking so formal, and pushes open the door.

Wanda, Morgan, Nakia and Shuri make appropriate noises of approval as she steps into the room. Pepper is smiling, a hand pressed to her mouth and tears rolling down her face. Only Okoye looks less than pleased.

“You look so fierce.” Shuri informs her, rushing forward to adjust her train.

“A total knockout.” Nakia nods.

“You look like a doll!” She chuckles at the four-year-old’s exclamation. It’s very sweet, probably the best compliment she’s ever gotten. Plus, she’s starting to feel like a doll.

“Okoye?” The general eyes her up and down, expression unchanging.

“How are you planning to fight in that dress?”

Wanda and Pepper freeze, unsure of how to react, but Nakia laughs and Shuri rolls her eyes.

“It’s her wedding day, General. She isn’t fighting anyone.” Shuri exclaims between giggles.

“This is an American wedding. The most physical thing they do is dance.” Nakia adds.

“Until the wedding night, that is.” And now she’s trying not to snicker at the princess’s innuendo.

The rest of the appointment is a blur. A tailor checks and rechecks the measurements, pinning up whatever he deems too long or large, letting out anything too constricting. Girl talk ensues and the champagne flows. By the time they go their separate ways, each with a bridesmaid’s (or in Morgan’s case, flower girl) dress in their possession, she’s the only one who’s not at least slightly buzzed.

She should really head home. It’s late in the afternoon, and she’s still got papers to grade. However, she finds herself driving in the opposite direction of where she lives. After today, she needs some time to herself, away from anyone else and the possibility of unintentionally seeing their future.

At a red light, she stops and dictates a voice-to-text message, informing Barnes that, “It’s going to be a late one. Stopping by a few places on the way home. Let me know if you want me to pick up something.” The reply comes thirty seconds later. “Take your time. Text me when you’re on your way. Stay safe.” This wedding may not be exactly what she’d pick for herself, but the man she gets to spend the rest of her life alongside certainly is.

She drives aimlessly for a while, no destination in mind. Finally, she decides that while she’s out, she may as well kill two birds with one stone. Pepper mentioned that they’re still lacking the “something old” from ‘something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue’. She considered joking that the groom is over a century old so they’ve got that covered, but as an antique store appears on her right, she decides to go in and see if anything catches her eye.

A bell rings as soon as she steps inside, and although she can’t see anyone, a voice calls out from the center of the store to, “Shout if you need anything.” It’s a hodgepodge of various items, most in disrepair, all covered in a blanket of dust. She comes across a coin in the display counter minted in 1917 and is about to ask if she can get a closer look at it (there’s something about a sixpence in a shoe if she’s remembering correctly), but that’s when she sees it.

The wedding dress is clearly vintage, more than likely an original. As she takes a closer look at the tag, she sees that it reads “hand sewn, 1942”. The price is marked $25 dollars, a good deal even if it were in disrepair. Instead, she can’t find a thing wrong with it. It’s almost as if someone unearthed this in the back of a closet, perfectly preserved, and thought, “Here’s a way to make a quick buck.” For a moment, she allows herself to dream of how she’d look in it, but as the salesperson appears, she pushes that daydream to the side.

“May I see the nickel from 1917, please?”

With one last longing look at the dress, she pays for her purchase, and leaves the store behind.

___________________________________________________________________________________

It’s not unusual for him to have nightmares. Most times, he can tell that what’s going on around him is a dream, not real life, and wake himself up. Not tonight, however. It all feels too real, not one of his usual dreamscapes, so that he’s stuck reliving a scene from earlier in the day.

It really wasn’t that big of a deal. Coming out of the pet store on his way home with a few bags of dog food (not to mention more toys than the mutt really needs because, despite himself, he’s a sucker for their tripod of a dog), he got recognized. There was the flash of a picture being taken to his right, and when he turned, a man holding a smartphone asked, “Hey, you’re that Winter Solder guy, aren’t you?” In reality, he pretended not to have heard and kept walking, and that was the end of it. In his dream, he’s driven all the way home, only to be cornered as he’s stepping out of his car and activated by HYDRA.

“Longing-”

“Stop.”

“-rusted. Seventeen. Daybreak-”

“Not again. Please.”

“-furnace. Nine. Benign-” As the HYDRA agent speaks, he realizes that she’s in the room with him. Oh no.

“Get out of here! Run!” He tries to warn her, but she just smiles at him, and although he can’t hear what she’s saying, he can see her lips forming the words, “I love you.”

“-One. Freight Car.”

“No!” He bolts upright in bed, drenched in a cold sweat. It’s only when the chill of the night air makes him shiver that he realizes it was just a dream.

“Whoa.” He’s still trying to catch his breath when he feels her hand on his shoulder. “You’re okay, Bucky. Take some deep breaths. That’s it.” He used to be embarrassed whenever this would happen, especially if he managed to wake her up in the process. But since Thanos, all of that has gone by the wayside, and it’s a common occurrence for her to wake up screaming and flailing also.

Practice makes perfect, so it’s only a few moments before his breathing returns to normal and he feels his heart regain it’s rhythm. He turns to her to apologize, but stops short.

“You were already awake.” She nods.

“Yeah. Couldn’t sleep. My mind’s too busy.”

“Busy with what?” As he asks it, he settled back into bed, turning on his side to face her.

“Are we just gonna ignore that you had a nightmare?” He nods

“For now, yeah. It’s still too fresh.” A look of understanding settles on her face. He’s eternally grateful that she’s not one to push him into talking before he’s ready.

“I can’t stop thinking about the fucking wedding.” He snickers at her profanity. “Five hundred people, Buck. Five hundred! I don’t even know that many people, much less like them.” It’s like she’s read his mind.

“All of them staring at us…” She shudders. “It’s silly, but what if I have a vision and instead of saying “I Do” I say, ‘Watch your head!’ or something else just as stupid?”

“Then you’ll be doing better than me.” Her brow furrows in confusion. “I keep having this recurring dream that we get around to the vows and I forget how to talk. Then I look down and realize I’m not wearing pants.” That reminds him… “You still haven’t told me how trying on the dress went.”

She sighs.

“It was an experience.” That can’t be good.

“Didn’t it fit?”

“Oh, it fit.” She nods. “Like a glove.” Then what’s the problem? “It’s a beautiful dress, and I really appreciate all the effort Pepper put into it, but…” Oh. Now he thinks he understands.

“It’s not quite what you imagined.” It’s not a question, but she nods.

“No, but then again, I never imagined my wedding dress because I never imagined getting married.”

“But you still want to, right?” He shouldn’t ask that, but there’s a niggling fear at the back of his mind that she’s realized she doesn’t want to be stuck with him for the rest of their lives.

“Of course I do.” They’re facing each other, crumpled sheets between then, and she reaches out to caress his cheek. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily, Barnes, nightmare wedding or not.”

They’re quiet for a few minutes, the only sound the air vents circulating a cool breeze through the bedroom. Then she asks,

“Did you ever imagine it? A wedding or getting married?” It’s not something he’d easily admit to most people, but he nods.

“Yeah, I did. Back before the war.”

“Tell me about it.” She closes her eyes, and he can’t help but feel a slight wave of excitement that he gets to see her like this forever.

“It wasn’t like I spent a lot of time daydreaming about it, but…” It was just one of those natural things, a given in life; you get a job, find a girl, get married, and settle down to have a houseful of kids. When the war started, he saw so many of his friends go ahead and tie the knot with their girls before they shipped out, and he took it for granted that one day, he’d do the same thing.

“I guess I figured on having Steve there, standing up with me.” Of course, now Steve is an old man, physically as well as chronologically. He’ll be there of course. Even serve as the best man. However, it looks a little different than he imagined. “It’d probably be small, because we weren’t dirt poor, but we weren’t exactly rich either. Friends and family.” She nods, eyelids still lowered. “Didn’t put much thought into decorations or clothes, but I imagined walking out with her on my arm, whoever the girl ended up being-” Even in his wildest dreams, he couldn’t have imagined a woman as incredible as this. “-and dancing together after it, then heading back to our house, just the two of us.”

“It sounds-” She yawns, and he knows she’s nearly asleep. “-perfect.”

It does to him too, but over time, things change. Even if it sounds nice, a 1940’s shindig probably wouldn’t cut it in today’s busy world with it’s easy access to perfection. Still, a huge chunk of him wishes he could just steal her away and make their promises to each other in private. That makes him wonder: what did it look like when Steve and Peggy got hitched? He supposes he can ask soon enough. Steve’s arriving tomorrow after all.

___________________________________________________________________________________

“You need any help in there?” Steve thinks about shooting back that he may be old (well, ancient is probably more accurate at this stage) but he can still manage to put on his pants without help, thanks. Instead he just answers,

“Nope. Just giving you a few extra minutes to primp before I come out and embarrass you by pulling off this suit better than you do.” As he pulls on his jacket, he hears Bucky laugh.

“Whatever you say, punk.”

He’s lived a full life, made plenty of other friends. However, he still hasn’t clicked the same way he does with the jerk from Brooklyn, even if said jerk is now seventy years younger than him.

“Alright, I’m done making myself pretty. Get out here, old man.” Chuckling, he pushes open the changing room door and joins Sam and Bucky.

“I don’t know what you two are bragging about.” Sam grins and straightens his tie. “Clearly I’m the best looking person here even without being hopped up on super soldier mojo.”

Bucky fakes a frown and elbows Sam.

“Remind me again why you’re invited to my wedding?”

“Because the bride likes me.”

“No accounting for taste.”

“Clearly, since she’s marrying you.”

Even though it’s obviously a joke, Steve internally winces. He’s already half-way expecting to talk Bucky down off the ledge at least three times in the next two days, convince him that yes you you are good enough for this girl, no I don’t think she’s making a mistake entrusting her future to you. Back in the day, he was the shy one with a lack of self-confidence. After everything HYDRA did, it’s his best friend who believes he’s unworthy of a second chance at life.

However, throughout most of the morning, there’s absolutely no sign of the impending breakdown. Steve’s nearly convinced that he’s guessed wrong, that there won’t be any fires to put out when, on the drive back to his hotel room, it happens.

“Can I ask you something?” He can’t really read his best friend’s facial expression since the other man is driving, facing straight ahead, but if the tension in body language is anything to judge from, this isn’t going to be a casual conversation.

“Sure.”

“Were you nervous before you and Peggy tied the knot?”

He nods.

“More like scared shitless.” It wasn’t the fact that, for the rest of their lives, they would be tied together, not just emotionally but legally as well. If anything, he was nearly giddy with excitement over that part. “All those people with their eyes on you and your dearly beloved? Don’t tell anyone, but five minutes before I had to be in place, I was in the bathroom losing my lunch.” Bucky snickers, and even he chuckles at the memory. “But I got through it because it was her. She was what I wanted at the end of the day. I would’ve gone through with it in front of a million people or in a broom closet. It didn’t matter. Everything except Peg was just trappings.”

Neither of them say anything else for the rest of the trip. On Steve’s part, he’s mentally reliving the day he married Peggy Carter through his memories. In fact, he’s so busy reminiscing that he doesn’t realize the car has stopped moving and they’re parked outside the hotel until his name is called for what must be at least the third time.

“Sorry.” He smiles apologetically. “It’s just a side affect of getting old: you spend a lot of time stuck in the past and forget about the present.”

“It’s okay.”

He reaches to open his door, but before he can-

“Do you have anything going this afternoon? Maybe need to take a nap or something?” This time, he doesn’t swallow down the sarcastic comment that springs to mind.

“Yeah, right after I finish rubbing liniment on my joints, I’m gonna go down to the old folks’ home and play bingo, maybe yell at some kids to get off my lawn. That is, unless you have something else in mind.”

“Well, I was gonna go interrupt my girl’s day and ask her if she’d go down to the courthouse and elope with me since we’re both dreading the trappings, but it sounds like you’re busy, so…”

It’ll smart later, but he tags the back of his best friend’s head.

“Go get your girl, jerk. Just tell me when and where to meet you.”

“Are you sure you don’t need a nap?”

“Respect your elders!”

___________________________________________________________________________________

She’s elbow deep in clothing (when the hell did they acquire that many tshirts between them), attempting to make a dent in the number of things they still have to pack before next week’s move-in date, when she hears the apartment door open. That’s weird. He’s not supposed to be home until later in the day. It’s unnecessary, a reflex at this point, but she feels for the hidden knife she still keeps on her at nearly all times. It’s most likely not an intruder, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.

The funny thing about living with someone is that the little things about them, details you never forced yourself to pay attention to, become ingrained in your memory without you realizing it. In this case, she recognizes the speed and heaviness of the footfalls, and that’s what makes her lower her guard.

“In the bedroom.” He hasn’t asked, but it’ll save him from looking through each room that comes before this one. And, if he’s home this early, they’ll probably have something to discuss.

“Hey.”

As she repeats the greeting back to him, she studies his expression. A smile, small but genuine. Also… nervous? That’s strange. She’s gotten good at reading the tiny tells that are still there behind the perfect, unflappable mask, but usually it takes her a lot longer to crack the code. Something major is going on.

“How’s the packing coming?” As he asks, he picks up a shirt (one of his, although it’s not folded) and tosses it into a box.

“It’s coming along fine. Do you want to talk about it some more or dive into why you’re home so early?”

“That depends. Do you already know what I’m gonna say?”

She shakes her head. No visions so far, at least not about this.

“Then I guess I’d better quit stalling.” That doesn’t sound good. “So, about the wedding.” For a moment, she’s worried he’s calling it off, that he’s decided he’d rather not spend the rest of his life with her. But if that were the case, wouldn’t he have mentioned it last night when they were both lying there unable to sleep, discussing things? “Is it safe to say we’re both dreading it? Not what comes after, but the part where five hundred of our closest friends stare at us?”

Her lips curl into a smirk.

“You could say that.”

“Well, I was thinking that maybe there’s a way to avoid it and still get the job done. Something more like what we talked about last night. You were awake for that part, right?”

Barely. In fact, she remembers her final thought before drifting off being, “I wish we could do things that way.” Still…

“Pepper’s put so much effort in. People are traveling, have already made arrangements-”

“So we still show up on Saturday, but behind the scenes, we would’ve already made things official. Maybe gone to the courthouse like you wanted to, just us and Steve? One other person if you had anyone in mind, since there need to be two witnesses?” It’s an appealing idea. The marriage license is still sitting on the kitchen table, waiting for them to sign on the day of. In theory, all they need to do is make an appointment and show up with their two witnesses. In practice…

“Hypothetically speaking, when would we be doing this?” Immediately, the small sign of nervousness melts from his face.

“This afternoon at four thirty, since that’s the only time before Saturday they had available. Hypothetically.”

She pretends to think about it, but can’t hide the smile that sneaks across her face.

“Then it’s a yes.” Now they’re both smiling like idiots. Taking his offered hand, she rights herself and circles her arms around his neck.

“So we’re really doing this, huh?” His arms wrap around her, and now they’re so close, she can feel his heart beating.

“Looks that way.” She leans up, closing the gap between them and presses her lips against his.

It’s tempting to just stand there, making out like teenagers, but eventually, she has to back away. It’s comical how startled he looks (that and slightly flustered).

“I’ve gotta get out of here.”

“What?”

She snickers. “I don’t know much about weddings, but I’m fairly certain you’re not supposed to see me ahead of time. Bad luck and all.”

“Wouldn’t want to risk that.” With one last peck, he lets her go. “Do you want me to head out and give you the apartment, or-”

“No, you stay. I actually have some errands to run.” Not saying another word (otherwise, she’ll end up gushing about how she can’t to start their life together), she grabs her keys from the nightstand and heads towards the door.

Once she’s in the car, a memory from the other day of that 1940s wedding dress sitting in an antique store comes back to her. There wasn’t a size on the label, and the material might be too fragile for her to even get it on her body. But it was so… perfect. It’s decided: she’s going in search of it. If it fits her, yay! If it doesn’t work out, she’s still got enough time to stop in at a department store and purchase something else.

The whole thing is slightly absurd. She peals into the antique store and, after eyeballing the dress, purchases it without so much as trying it on. Then, stopping at a fast food place, she undresses in a bathroom stall and pulls on the dress. The material is slightly musty from all the years of disuse, but it goes on easily. As she peers at herself in the bathroom mirror, a giggle rises from deep inside her. For the first time in this whole process, she feels like a bride.

She’s still dressed in the vintage white gown when she steps inside the first florist’s shop she comes across The woman behind the counter gives her a strange look, but doesn’t ask any questions as she sells her the simple bouquet of violets with a few pieces of greenery. She knows she must look odd, but she can’t bring herself to care. She’s flying too high. Maybe that’s the reason why, as she puts the finishing touches on her makeup, still in her car, she tucks a few of the flowers into her hair. There. That’s better.

She spots his car in the parking lot, so she knows he’s already there. That’s when the nerves hit her. This is it. They’re actually doing this. After today they won’t just be to people sharing an apartment (among other things); they’ll be husband and wife. She’s ready. God, is she ready. But the enormity of it is intimidating. What if she’s not a good wife? What if he’s expecting her to be the perfect domestic goddess (that’s absurd, she knows, but rationality just flew out the window)? Or on a more practical level, what if he doesn’t like how she looks? There’s only one way to find out. Slowly, hands shaking, she pulls open the courthouse door.

Steve’s waiting for her just inside the building. Apparently, he takes traditions very seriously, because when she asks where Bucky is, he just shakes his head. “He’s here, but you’re not gonna see him until you’re in the room, about to sign the paperwork.” She’s not going to fight it (after all, she’s the one who brought up separating in the first place), but she does still have a question.

“Steve, can I ask you for a massive favor?”

“Sure.” Here it goes.

“I know there’s not a real aisle, but would you walk me inside?” He may be seventy years older than he was when she met him, but the smile is still the same.

“Yeah. I’d be honored to do it.”

___________________________________________________________________________________

Bucky’s not sure what the connection is between being so nervous you’re ready to climb the walls and the urge to pace, but regardless, that’s what he’s doing. The clock in the office where he’ll be exchanging vows with the woman he loves more than he ever thought was possible reads four twenty-nine. One minute left, give or take. One minute, and then the rest of his life begins.

The seconds hand seems to move incredibly slowly, but finally, it reaches it’s destination. On cue, the door opens, and all the breath leaves his lungs. Here she is.

It’s not the way he’d imagined it as a kid. Steve’s not at his side. He’s considerably older, rougher around the edges. They’re in a courthouse instead of a church. But as a kid, he also didn’t imagine anything that can compare to her.

It goes without saying that she’s beautiful; that’s always the case. But all the old stories are true: there’s something about seeing her in a white dress walking towards him just before they promise to love, honor, and cherish each other for the rest of their lives that makes her shine like never before. She’s not just beautiful. She’s brilliant.

“Hey.” Right. He need to say something.

“Hey. You made it.”

She chuckles and pushes back a stray tendril.

“Yeah, well I had a date I was really excited for, so I rearranged my schedule.”

Before he can say anything else (he’s not sure what, because frankly, all thoughts except “I love you” have disappeared), the door opens and a man in a business suit sticks his head out.

“Is everyone here?”

He looks at her for confirmation.

“Everyone that needs to be.”

“Then right this way.”

He’s not aware of much that is said during the ceremony after they join hands, too busy memorizing what she looks like so he’ll never forget. This is definitely one of those moments you want to carry with you the rest of your life.

They stick to the standard vows. He takes her to be his lawfully wedded wife to have and hold from this day forward, for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and health, to love and to cherish ‘til death do them part, and vise versa. As he slips the ring on her finger, he catches her eye and mouths a silent, “I love you.”, which she repeats back as she slides on his wedding band.

“By the power vested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you husband and wife.” That’s it. This is real. They’re married. “You may kiss the bride.” He doesn’t have to be told twice.

After the paperwork is signed, they agree to go and have dinner. Steve’s come all this way, and something seems right about celebrating with his oldest friend. He hadn’t thought far enough ahead to make a reservation so, still dressed in their formal clothes, they slide into a corner booth at a local diner. Nothing important is said; it’s mostly laughter and inside jokes between a group of friends. By seven o’clock, he’s dropped Steve off at his hotel and is on his way back home.

The apartment is mostly packed up at this point. The only things left are their clothes, a few kitchen and bathroom essentials, and their bed. Even the record player she gave him as a birthday gift has been shipped off to the townhouse they’ll officially move into sometime next week. But, he thinks to himself as he lets himself in, the great thing about going to sleep in 1945 and waking up in the 2000s is that while his taste in music may not have evolved by much, technology has. Which means-

“Hey, stranger.” She’s still wearing the dress, their dog sitting next to her on the bed with his head in her lap. It would be a crime to let that go to waste.

“Come here.” He motions for her to join him, and as soon as she stands, starts scrolling through is phone.

“What are you doing?” The confusion melts from her face as the first few notes of the song fill the room.

Holding out his hand, he asks, “May I have this dance?”

A soft smile crosses her face as, nodding, she folds herself into his arms.

“You can have every dance.”

Two days from now, they’ll stand in front of five hundred people, most of whom they've never met before, and make their vows once again. It'll be uncomfortable and even a little jarring, but it won’t matter. Steve's right: it’s all trappings. What’s real is now; the beautiful woman in his arms, his wife, and the life they’ll build together. It’s not what Bucky imagined all those years ago as a naïve kid in Brooklyn. This is far better.

[finewalls]

#showyourprocess

From planning to posting, share your process for making creative content!

To continue supporting content makers, this tag game is meant to show the entire process of making creative content: this can be for any creation.

RULES - When your work is tagged, show the process of its creation from planning to posting, then tag up to 5 people with a specific link to one of their creative works you’d like to see the process of. Use the tag #showyourprocess so we can find yours.

I am lowkey late but I finally have proper time to do this fun thing! Thank you  @tomthenetherlands for tagging me (check her process here). I was asked to explain my process of making this lyric animation so here we go

[disclaimer: I’ve deleted everything but the final product from my computer so I’ll mostly explain with text only]

1. PLANNING: Okay first I got this request on my ask box bc I was lowkey doing a series, so I knew the style I was gonna go with: simplistic animation. That’s pretty much all the plan was fhgsdjkfhksda

2. BASEWORK: Now first thing I did is choose the best lyrics for the edit and started searching for videos best fit to use as the base for the edit. Immediately knew to use a clip from the movie 1917 because of the burning city scene, for the first lyric. Then a clip from walls as I wanted to insert Louis into it and went through some true blood ship videos to find a good one of two guys kissing dfhgsdjfsk and for the last one I originally wanted a wedding scene but the one I tried to use was way too difficult to work with it so I used another part from the same video as base. Now that I got my videos I open up photoshop and get working

3. PHOTOSHOP: Starting with GIF number 1

Just like with every GIF I import the video and choose the frames I want yada yada. Now first before I start the ‘animation’ process I sharpen the GIF once and then I over colour the whole thing. Like over saturated and massive contrast so it’s easier to work with. Also in this case made everything super warm like yellow and orange all over. Then comes the fun part! I started painting each frame making sure it’s not too flashy and clear enough so you recognise what’s happening. Since this was the first of the edit I chose a simple colour palette I could use in the other GIFs as well. Ones I was happy with the frames I resize the canvas to 600x400px and compressed the GIF once and then open it again, added the lyrics on top and standard GIF making again. 

GIF number 2! This one took me about 3 times until I got it right. I did so much recolouring I almost gave up hdgjkaslga

But just like the first one, colouring, sharping etc. and then again one frame at a time painting the scene and making sure you see human shapes. As you can still see the right side of the gif is a mess bc why did't I just paint it all black idk. But with this I recoloured it again after painting bc I wasn’t happy with the shades, and then again and again bc fun. But yeah, resize, compress, add text, tha-da

GIF number 3, my fave

Okay with this one I cheated a little to get it done quickly. So otherwise same as the others, but instead of going frame by frame to paint, I just put all the frames through a filter at once to get the result. Which is why it’s the smoothest of them all too tbh. But just had to fix the colours with colouring tools but rest is standard GIF making.

GIF number 4, the one that I hated the most

Now see like I said, i had a different idea for this at first, but bc it didn’t work I decided to try this part of the same video (a married couple walking with their wedding party) First I turned everything black and white bc I figured this will be like minimalist (and easier to work with). Now I wanted to get rid of the other people so i basically painted all black and then went frame by frame getting the two people walking. Had to add the shadow of them as it looked painfully stickfigure-y without it djsakdgdfsh. Once I was happy with the animation I slapped on a pride flag bc I wanted it gay u know.. But to match with the rest of the GIFs I multiplied it and warmed up the colours a bit. Then again, compress, add text, standard.

ADDING IT TOGETHER READY FOR POSTING: Then I made sure all the edits match or like look nice together and the text was in the same level and such nice things and made sure I got them all in right size (in these I did 600x400px normally I go with 530px width) then it’s time to open tumblr.com

POSTING: Like with other edits I did for this ‘’series’’ I chose more lyrics from the song and added them as caption along with who requested it and saying do request more (still taking in requests btw even tho i didn’t get into the animation school)

I used the HTML to get the colours I used in the edit into the caption as well (used this when I first learned how to do that) 

now with tags I like to be talkative

I have the standard blogs I tag and bc it was Louis’ lyrics I tagged dt and I always use ‘[insert initials] edit’ for everything for my own navigation. And then I obviously make my own comments, which in this one are 100% accurate and I stand by them. I peaked here. 

ALL DONE: then I sit back and wait for the notes to roll in :) hjfgsdjkf

That is all thank you for reading if you did! I would like to see the process from

@curlyhairedprince for these motherfucking edits

@ltpolari for this edit bc colouring icon

@thesemptysounds for this incredible edit bc it’s my favorite thing ever and now on my wall forever thank you

@queersue for this edit (and many others posts alike) bc colouring legend

and finally @tomlinsun​ for this lil drawing which is also on my wall bc i love it so much!!

As always feel free to not reveal your process:

Thank you for coming to my ted talk I’ll see ya later.

[chucklerjuergens]

SONGS THATS IVE CONNECTED TO HBOWAR

Freaking out by the wrecks- this is literally my high school leckie au yall dont even wanna know (5k words in tho👀👀)

Romeo and juliet by dire straits as andyeddie- ‘i cant do everything but id do anything for you’ ‘the dice was loaded from the start and i bet, i bet, that you exploded into my heart’ ‘theres a place for us, you know the movie song / its just that the time was wrong’ i cry to this song every time i hear it also please listen to the killers’ version as well

29 (acoustic) by run river north as andyeddie- im sorry so many of these r andyeddie but i was screaming to tom abt this ill just add screenshots

Walk the other way by bend sinister as leckie- ok the lyrics are just so obvious to me and make me think of leckies relationship with the war esp when he first kills the japanese soldier in episode one and literally from then on lmao

Willow tree march by the paper kites reminds me of sledge so much just his spiral into war specifically the ‘we all still die’ part lmaoo but the song just gives me sledge vibes idk i cant really explain it beyond that

Outro by M83- this is super vague but it makes me think of pacific in general and i could literally not tell yall specifically why even at gunpoint

Mars by sleeping at last- the boys in general ok (also 1917) but the way they were happy before the war and then the reprecussions of it its the perfect song i adore it

Bleeding out by imagine dragons- also andyeddie lmao its obvious

The cave by mumford and sons as lipton- i was in a lipton mood when i discovered this song and i have the terrible habit of replaying a song constantly when i fall in love with it so now lip is eternally tied to this song also idk it could probably be connected to him in some other way but im lazy so yall tell me. EDIT: @lovinmullen was able to take my feeble connection this song and actually turn it into something so here are his tags :’) as always, perfectly said and it makes a lot of sense to me !!

This is war by 30 seconds to mars- ... do i need to elaborate??? The song itself is really good and the parts where it goes ‘the fight is done, the war is won, lift your hands towards the sun’ and ‘its the moment to live its the moment to die its the moment to fight to fight to fight’ and ita kinda explodes?? Good shit !! Ok i have a list going of all the things mentioned theres: Soldier- which im thinking leckie for? - civilian- which makes me think of sledge? Or maybe sid??? -Martyr- very much basilone but theres another i think fits him as well- victim makes me think of gibson bc he was a victim of the war mentally but maybe it goes for eddie too possibly?? Or maybe the japanese civilians or wait maybe those can go up into civilian category -prophet makes me think of hoosier and his bs lmao idk why -liar- also makes me think of sledge bc he lied about his heart murmur to fight -honest- makes me think of stella bc she was protecting her family and didnt lead leckie on like when she thought she needed to, she shut shit down and was honest with him about why-leader- ANDDDYYYYYY -pariah- this means outcast which also makes me think of gibson lol -victor- i have no clue i was thinking JP bc he survived when all his friends didnt like manny and john didnt but also i dont think it fits -messiah- also makes me think of basilone when he was sent home to do the war bonds and became a staple of the war itself as he was awarded with the medal of honor

Little fang by avey tares slasher flicks- makes me think of liebgott

Rabbit heart by florence + the machine- shifty powers (it makes sense in me head)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Adam Watches the 92nd Academy Awards

The 92nd Academy Awards have come and gone. As always, there’s plenty to be happy about and plenty that’ll make you wonder what the heck the voters were thinking. I watched the ceremony and while I may say that I don’t care… I do. Those awards are a big deal. Legions of people who would’ve otherwise dismissed Parasite as some movie that requires them to read subtitles saw it because it was nominated. One of those golden statues can make a career and let’s face it, you like to hear your love for something validated by people who have even the semblance of authority on the subject.

But here’s what you may not know: most of the voters really don’t know what they’re doing. While cinematographers NOMINATE what films are up for that Best Cinematography Award, EVERYONE in the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences gets to vote for the winner and there’s no guarantee they’ve actually seen every nominee, know what the technical terms mean or are voting because what they saw is what they actually believe was “the best”. Once you take into account the dollars required to produce a nomination campaign, the stigma many genre films face, the prejudices against certain types of roles and/or actors, and how popularity influences votes, a win hardly means more than a bunch of people you don’t know saying they liked a movie.

If you want a better idea of which of 2019’s films were “the best”, you’re better off asking someone you know and trust, someone who can prove they’ve done their homework and aren’t just voting for their friends, the one they’ve heard is good from their kid, or got a special gift basket from. I may not be a paid professional, but I have put in the time and effort to see EVERYTHING nominated (with a few exceptions I’ll detail below). Reviews for some of these (The Irishman, Judy) are coming to the blog in a couple of days. If it were up to me the list of nominees would be different but we’ll get to that later. Without further ado, here’s who SHOULD’VE won. 

Best Visual Effects

1917 – Guillaume Rocheron, Greg Butler, and Dominic Tuohy The best special effects are the kind you don’t even notice. I couldn’t tell you where the explosions, sets, and actors in 1917 begin, and where the computer-generated imagery takes over. It’s seamless.

Best Film Editing

Parasite – Yang Jin-mo Got to hand it to Parasite for its amazing use of montage and the way it stitched its footage together. Some shots I initially thought initially were one take I realized under carefully scrutiny - and by that I mean frame-by-frame examination - were actually two melded together. The scenes showing how the Kim family infiltrate the Park’s household should be shown in film class to demonstrate how the art of montage is at its best should be done to maximum effect.

Best Costume Design

Little Women – Jacqueline Durran Funny how every single film nominated at the 92nd Academy Awards was a period piece. My vote goes to Little Women not because it was necessarily the most accurate (I couldn’t tell you what people wore in 1868) but because of the way the costumes were used. You can tell a lot about the characters from the multiple outfits they wear throughout the film - check out that purple bonnet adorned by Aunt Marsh (Meryl Streep).

Best Makeup and Hairstyling

Bombshell – Kazu Hiro, Anne Morgan, and Vivian Baker I called it when I reviewed the film. The makeup used to transform John Lithgow was nothing short of incredible. It was an easy pick.

Best Cinematography

1917 – Roger Deakins I’m glad to see The Lighthouse on this list but I have to hand it to 1917. The one-shot motif adds so much to the story. Then, there are the individual shots I remember so vividly. The quiet meadow just outside of No Man’s Land, the raging inferno Schofield sees when he wakes up, the trench he must run in front of to reach the Colonel are all shots that permanently imprint themselves into your memory.

Best Production Design

1917 – Production Design: Dennis Gassner; Set Decoration: Lee Sandales Tempted to hand it to Parasite for the house they constructed for the movie but I’m give it to 1917. The trenches, the blasted landscape of No Man’s Land still haunt me. When you see the craters, it’s jarring. Then, as your eyes become adjusted, you notice the rats. Then, the chunks of bone and charred meat that have now become part of the landscape. It’s horrific.

Best Sound Mixing

Ford v Ferrari – Paul Massey, David Giammarco, and Steven A. Morrow What you remember most from Ford v Ferrari is that big race at the end. The climax wouldn’t have been the same without the sounds we heard. The roar of the engines, the clacking and grinding as the pedals are pushed and gears are switched… the air rushing by. Out of the nominees, it’s the one whose sounds I most remember.

Best Sound Editing

Ford v Ferrari – Donald Sylvester This year, the Best Sound Editing award goes hand-in-hand with the sound mixing. Obviously, the actors were never moving at the kind of speeds depicted in Ford v Ferrari but you wouldn’t be able to tell because of the foley and sound design.

Best Original Song

Stand Up from Harriet – Music and Lyrics by Joshuah Brian Campbell and Cynthia Erivo Stand Up plays during the end credits of Harriet and it perfectly caps the film. Whenever I hear its lyrics, I’m transported back to that moment. It’s the most memorable and emotional song on this list.

Best Original Score

Joker – Hildur Guðnadóttir I chose the best song for its ability to stand out. In this category, Joker wins because its music doesn’t stand out… at least not at first. While you’re watching, those notes don’t draw attention to themselves. They subconsciously build the mood, augmenting the performance by Joaquin Phoenix, the visuals, and the story. You don’t notice how much of an effect it has on you until you see isolated clips. When you do, it’s shocking.

Best Animated Short Film

Abstaining (I’ve only seen Hair Love)

Best Live Action Short Film

Abstaining

Best Documentary Short Subject

Abstaining

Best Documentary Feature

Abstaining

Best International Feature Film

Abstaining, as I’ve only seen 2 films (Pain and Glory and Parasite)

Best Animated Feature Film

I Lost My Body – Jérémy Clapin and Marc du Pontavice I Lost My Body is the most audacious and inspired of the animated films nominated. The only movie among these to be aimed at adults, it often tells its story through visuals alone but when you get to the end, you realize it’s about more than just what was on-screen.

Best Adapted Screenplay

Little Women – Greta Gerwig based on the novel by Louisa May Alcott Greta Gerwig does more than merely adapt the classic novel, she breathes new life into it, makes it her own, makes it feel wholly new and modern. This version of the film surpasses all others we’ve seen before because of the changes she’s made to the story’s structure. 

Best Original Screenplay

Knives Out – Rian Johnson What a ride Knives Out was. It’s got so many twists and turns, so many delightful characters you want to re-watch it the second it’s over so that you are no longer distracted by its central mystery and can simply step back and admire the handiwork by Rian Johnson. A sequel’s been announced and I can’t wait to see it.

Best Supporting Actress

Laura Dern – Marriage Story as Nora Fanshaw Laura Dern was also in Little Women and her two roles couldn’t be more different. Here, she’s loathsome and captivating. As soon as I saw Nora take off her shoes before she kneeled down on the couch to console Nicole, I knew there was a whole lot more to her character than what we were told. The more you see her, the more you want.

Best Supporting Actor

Al Pacino – The Irishman as Jimmy Hoffa Al Pacino has the advantage of getting A LOT of screen time as Jimmy Hoffa. The Irishman clocks in at over 3,5 hours and he isn’t in the whole movie but when he is, the seasoned performer gives us so much. At different periods of the story, you’ll feel differently about him. There’s no point comparing him to the real-life person. He takes the meaty role and makes it his own. His voice, his mannerisms, I can’t think of anyone who could’ve done it better.

Best Actress

Renée Zellweger – Judy as Judy Garland Judy was the very last movie on my list to watch, having missed it when it came to theatres. When I think back to Zellweger’s performance, I don’t see her. All I see is her character, a rich, complex person you sometimes hate, sometimes love and feel sorry for. The movie is not going to be on my “Best of” list but she is.

Best Actor

Joaquin Phoenix – Joker as Arthur Fleck / Joker To me, there was no question Joaquin Phoenix would take this one. I saw Joker three times and each time, I found something new in his performance.

Best Director

Sam Mendes – 1917 With this award, I’m awarding Sam Mendes for the craft he displayed in 1917. It’s such a visceral experience that when people asked me how it compared to Dunkirk, it felt weird to lump both together. This is coming from someone who gave both pictures a 5-star review, who put both on their respective “best of the year” lists. It’s a movie I’m going to go back to and wondering “how did they do that?!

Best Picture

Little Women – Amy Pascal It’s a tough call for me this year, partially because I loved Parasite, 1917, Joker, and others so much. I’m planning on adding those three films to my collection so I can pop them into my Blu-ray player any times I feel like it. That said, I would’ve given the Best Picture Award to Little Women. You’re so emotionally invested in this little story that telling you why with merely words is impossible. You fall in love over and over. It made me cry and every time I think back to that scene at Christmas, I tear up again. I’m choosing it because of all the things it does differently from the other films. At the end of the day, it isn’t a big story. It isn’t about people with guns, corruption, war, a turning point in history or even necessarily the biggest event in the lives of the characters but it feels like it is. That’s exactly why it’s so good. 

Disagree with my choices? I don’t blame you. What kind of idiot finds a way to leave out Marriage Story from their list? You let me know where it should’ve gone. Hopefully, commenting keep you warm until MY Best of 2019 list gets posted in the next few days.

[sjrresearch]

Why Not Wargame World War I or Vietnam?

Historical Wargaming, like many hobbies, has fads. One year, Ancients might be big, or it may be Colonials. The next, World War II. But two periods have not, at least in my own observation, gotten their day in the sun. At least not in US wargaming circles (and I will be speaking almost exclusively to that, as I am less familiar with, though still knowledgeable of, the British wargaming scene). 

These periods are the First World War and Vietnam. Both were major conflicts with plenty of research materials available (unlike, say, the Grand Chaco War). Both have libraries of rules and boardgames written for them, but neither, at least not at the cons I’ve attended, are quite the attention-getters that other conflicts do. Why is this? I have some theories as to why.

Just a disclaimer, this is mostly an opinion piece, and your mileage may vary. 

American and British Views of the First World War and Vietnam

Let’s face it. Most American wargamers are patriotic folks. We want to play wargames where “our boys” feature prominently. World War II more than fits that bill. World War I does not. By the time the American Expeditionary Force arrived in France in strength in early 1918, the German Army was on its last legs. The Americans arrived in theatre in time to push the Germans off the proverbial cliff when the last German offensive in the west failed. Our active participation in the First World War was barely six months. Our fleets fought no major battles, and by the time we were shuttling troops to Europe, the U-Boat and raider menace was a shadow of what it used to be. In the air, American heroes were made, such as Frank Luke and Eddy Rickenbacker, but they, too, missed the worst of the Allied fortunes of the previous year.

In short, while American forces improved the overall strategic position of the Western Allies, the US Army was poorly prepared for the modern battlefield. Many of the American offensives, in the beginning, used the same types of massed frontal assaults that the British and French had abandoned the previous year due to the horrific casualties involved. The US Army often had to buy equipment from the British and the French to supplement their own needs, as our own industry had not geared up for war by the time the war ended.

In short, our role in the First World War was a minor one, relatively speaking. And that carries through to American wargamers. British wargamers learned a quite different lesson about the First World War from their school classes and their families than we did. We had 4 million men in the military for the First World War, half of that went to France, and half of that saw any combat. Compare that with the Second World War, where you had 15 million Americans in the military. So, for many wargamers of a certain age, they were more likely to have a World War II veteran in the family at some point than a World War I veteran. 

In Britain, this was different. Over 5 million men in Great Britain enlisted, which was almost 25% of the male population at the time. Add in the fact that the British lost almost 750,000 men worldwide over four years and the United States lost 110,000 in the space of five or six months, a different image of World War I appears. In the US, it is a conflict we do not game much because nobody pays much attention to it (though, with recent movie releases such as 1917, this seems to be changing). In Britain, World War I is seen as a national tragedy. It is of boys being sent off to the slaughter at places like the Somme and Passandachele. And since Britain is in many ways the “mecca” of hobby wargaming, it is inevitable that a feeling of “No, that’s just not something we want to game out” took hold for an awfully long time.

Moreover, the Western Front was not a war of movement except at the very beginning and end. That is why most boardgames on World War I tend to concentrate either on other theatres (the East is extremely popular), 1914 or 1918. Miniatures games tend to center around the same, or game out the war in the air or at sea. 

Vietnam is the opposite in so very many ways. American participation in the conflict was massive from the beginning, and the conflict lasted ten years. Approximately 2.7 million Americans served in Vietnam, and the war showcased some advanced weapons systems on both sides. But it was an unpopular war at home that tore the social fabric of the time asunder. Wargaming in this country truly came of age in the 1970s, and Vietnam was still seen as a “dirty” war, again, one not worth gaming. In British wargaming circles, Vietnam has been big and never really stopped being big. I remember all my British “glossies” (slang for the British Wargaming magazines, named as such for their glossy covers) full of articles on Vietnam. 

There was a small uptick in gaming Vietnam in the mid-to-late 1980s in this country, as various movies came out from Hollywood, but the nature of the conflict is not easy to game. Vietnam epitomized the old saying about combat: “Long periods of boredom punctuated by short, sharp moments of sheer terror.” There were long periods of time where patrols would go out and find…nothing. Then a patrol would go out, and all hell would break loose. That is not easy to game. That is the larger truth at the tactical level about counterinsurgency. It’s not how many guerillas you kill, but it’s what you do to use “soft power” to undercut their support. That said, I have seen some good miniatures games on the subject, but most board games on Vietnam seem to be focused on the strategic and operational levels. 

Add in the popular beliefs about Vietnam and the men who fought there. None of them were true, but the media popularized them in the day, and popular opinion demonized the soldiers who fought there. Going back to fads, it was not hard to see why American wargamers to this day get a little queasy about gaming Vietnam.

Availability of Games and Miniatures

I am happy to say that times are a-changin’, as the old protest song from the Vietnam-era goes. Perhaps with World War I, there are no veterans in living memory, and there’s better history being done now (especially new history on the tactical innovations developed on the Western front putting an end to the pernicious myth of half-trained boys being slaughtered by uncaring commanders). And with Vietnam in this country, we are starting to see more Vietnam veterans opening up about their experiences and game designers and rules writers listening to them. 

So, here is an overview of what is out there both board gaming and miniatures-wise:

Board Games World War I

Ted Racier has written quite a few games on the First World War. It is not a period I game for the most part, but I played the 1918 game back when he published it in Command magazine. I personally think it was one of the three best games Command ever published, and I am glad to see GMT is bringing it back.

We all know what I think of this game, and I think it was a welcome window into the strategic realities of World War I. It is still one of the best Card Driven Games of all time.

I do not own this game, but the premise of doing a worldwide game of the First World War does intrigue me. It seems to put proper focus on economics and diplomacy, with the war of movement slowing down into an attritional model. All in all, it looks good, but if someone who has played it could let me know how it plays, that would be appreciated.

This game has been out for a while, and I had also heard a lot of buzz about it when it was released. Clash of Arms could have had a solid game in this, and I played it once. The rules needed a lot of work and probably could have used the “living rules” concept that other game companies used.  

Board Games Vietnam 

A note, this is not all-inclusive as there are a lot of Vietnam board games out there. I had to cherry-pick which ones would be of the widest possible interest. 

For a while, this game by Victory Games was the game on the Vietnam War. It was truly a monster game and covered every aspect of the war, from pacification to how dedicated the combatants were. It was well-designed and state of the art for its time. Sadly, it is out of print and not cheap to come by, but it is worth it if you can find a copy.

Downtown is probably one of the best games on what goes into planning and running an air campaign out there today. GMT still has the game in print (it is one of two games on Vietnam I own), and I have played it on VASSAL a few times. I really do like it. The designer, Lee Brinscombe-Wood, has gone on to write An Elusive Victory (The Arab-Israeli wars in the air) and The Burning Blue (The Battle of Britain), and Red Storm (A hypothetical Third World War in the skies over Germany) were also written all using the same rules system. The game details well the frustrations faced by the Americans over the skies of North Vietnam. You can purchase a copy here.

Mark H. Walker did some really neat work with his Lock ‘N Load series, and one of the first games in the series was about Vietnam. Lock N’ Load is a system that is at the same level as Squad Leader but is a bit simpler to play, but no less nuanced nor fun. I own the 1st Edition of Band of Heroes and will one of these days go out and get the new versions of the series. All of them play the same, with an emphasis on putting tactical decisions into the hands of the player, keeping the game moving and fun, with most scenarios taking no more than an hour or two. You get all the troop types: US Army, USMC, ARVN, NVA, VC, and yes, even Australians (for those wanting to game out the movie Danger Close). You can get a copy here. 

Meatgrinder is a game from the folks at Against the Odds magazine about the last stand of the ARVN at the town of Xuan Loc in 1975. The rules are beautifully written, and the articles that come with the game are incredible reading at times. It is games like this that remind us that there was still a war going on after the US pulled out in 1973, and the fall of South Vietnam had consequences. And it is just a great story of a hell of a stand. You can purchase a copy of the issue and the game here.

This was the game that was on everyone’s minds when it came out in 2014. The COIN series is an innovative set of games designed around a common rule set that games out insurgencies like Cuba in the 1950s, Columbia in the 1990s, and Afghanistan today, as well as Vietnam. I have yet to play any of the COIN games, but I want to. They are all highly recommended and address the problem of counterinsurgency quite well in a strategic context. You can purchase a copy here.

Miniatures Rules for World War I and Vietnam

Richard Clarke has a reputation with Too Fat Lardies for putting out good rules with card-driven mechanics. It is not everyone’s cup of tea, but it can produce a good game. I haven’t played Through the Mud and the Blood myself, but it has very good information on the various armies of the Western Front and the tactics they used, with the rules author making a fine argument that the tactical innovation opened up the stalemate of the Western Front in 1918 (it did). Too Fat Lardies’ products can be found all over the internet or in PDF or physical format on their website.

Peter Pig’s rules are meant for larger-scale fights, where each stand of troops is about a company in size, and the 6’x4’ board is sub-divided into squares and plays something like a board game. I will not say it is my cup of tea but may swear by it. You can buy digital copies via Peter Pig.

There are several rules for World War I also on Wargames Vault, and some, like Westfront, sound intriguing, but take a look for yourself.

Even though Force on Force is still sadly out of print, their Vietnam sourcebook and rules were probably one of the best rules sets out there for gaming the Vietnam war. Happily, PDF copies are still available for sale from the publisher for $20.00. You will need the base rules to play as well, but those are also available on PDF from the publisher.

Two Hour Wargames (THW) has been blurring the line between RPGs and Wargames for a while now and promising (and delivering) games in under two hours. Their Vietnam game is no different, as the game is centered around the idea of your “character” controlling a squad, and like most THW products, the game has very simple rules. There is also a campaign generator for scenarios you can play out on the tabletop. It is a great fun, pulpy take on Vietnam and is well worth the $20.00 price tag. The rules are for sale in PDF and can be found here.

Next week, we’ll discuss miniatures themselves, as that’s going to take an entire article in its own right!

 --

At SJR Research, we specialize in creating compelling narratives and provide research to give your game the kind of details that engage your players and create a resonant world they want to spend time in. If you are interested in learning more about our gaming research services, you can browse SJR Research’s service on our site at SJR Research.

--

(This article is credited to Jason Weiser. Jason is a long-time wargamer with published works in the Journal of the Society of Twentieth Century Wargamers; Miniature Wargames Magazine; and Wargames, Strategy, and Soldier.)

[fibula-rasa]

The Vamps Part 3: Pola Negri and Exoticism

CW: I will be referencing the Roma in this essay and the slur g*psy will pop up from historical sources.

In the first post of this series, I mentioned that modern critics draw a deeper connection between Vamps and bloodsucking vampires than existed in the teens. So, forgive me that this Vamps entry is going to focus on another trait often shared between Vamps and vampires: otherness. In the Bram Stoker tradition, the undead-other and the foreign-other coincide. Stoker didn’t invent the concept, but Dracula and its Eastern European evil infiltrating the west has informed most vampire stories since his novel was published.

Likewise, Vamps are often explicitly foreign or vaguely coded as such. Most often this foreignness is steeped in a stereotypical conception of the East. This East at the time was really anything east of Western Europe, from Slavs to East Asians. As you could probably surmise–it’s usually problematic and insulting. Although, since Vamps were an international phenomenon, this is by no means universal.

Enter Pola Negri.

Pola Negri was born Apolonia Chalupiec in Lipno (now Poland) in 1897 to a single mother. Her Slovak father was a resistance fighter sent to prison in Siberia when Negri was a small child. Now, according to Negri, her mother was from an impoverished line of Polish nobility and her father had “probably more than a touch of the bohemian gypsy in his blood.” This is probably made up. Negri averred these “biographical” details when building her image in America and reaffirmed them in her memoirs, published in 1970. It’s hard to put an exact date on when and where these fictions emerged in her life or in her career. I can speak from experience that Polish-Americans often love relating embellished tales of their ancestry, so this may have been Pola, the person, as much as it is Pola, the movie star. If it’s the latter, it would be very Pola. No one before or since has committed to a bit quite like her.

Pola started out as a successful ballet dancer in Warsaw and transitioned to acting after she fell ill with tuberculosis. She took on the name Negri after a favored Italian poet, Ada Negri. Pola found significant success on the Polish stage and she made the leap to the new medium of film in the presumed lost Slave of Sin / Niewolnica zmysłów (1914). (Yes, she did all that by 17.)

In Pola’s only surviving Polish film, The Polish Dancer / Bestia (1917), she’s an energetic young woman who stays out too late partying. After Pola flees her parents’ home, she becomes a cabaret dancer and manages to throw the lives of two men into chaos. So, Pola was cast in vampy roles from the very start. Bestia’s Vamp tale is a bit more sophisticated than a simple morality play though. Pola is a strong-willed and independent woman taking advantage of weaker men. But, Pola feels remorse. She’s a woman who carries trouble with her wherever she goes, but simply because she doesn’t hold with society’s standards and expectations for women. Whether or not Pola is the bestia (beast) referred to in the title is definitely up for debate. Pola is more a careless Vamp than a malicious one, as Theda Bara is in A Fool There Was (1914). This, of course, doesn’t save her characters from a tragic end. Pola’s Polish roles are very much akin to the types of vampy tragediennes Greta Garbo would soon stake her claim on in America.

Though Pola had played a few exotic roles in Poland, on stage and screen, it was moving to UFA in Germany that brought those roles in spades. Her success was middling in Germany until she met Ernst Lubitsch. I would liken the Negri-Lubitsch team up much like Jack Lemmon and Billy Wilder. Lemmon and Negri are both quite good on their own, but pairing with Wilder and Lubitsch brought out the absolute best in the performers. For UFA, Pola’s vampy image began to crystalize and along with that came the exotic, ethnic bent. In films like Carmen (1918) and Sumurun (1920) she plays a Romani Vamp and and “Oriental” Vamp, respectively. These films distilled the image of Pola as an agent of havoc in weak-willed men’s lives that was introduced in some of her Polish films.

The embargo on German films to America was lifted in 1919, partly due to the huge popularity of Pola’s film Madame DuBarry (1919). Pola’s impact on the American movie market was instant and many of her German films were bought up for American distribution. After an unofficial endorsement from Charlie Chaplin, Pola was signed to a contract with Famous Players-Lasky (soon to be Paramount).

Despite Pola arriving hot on the scene, the studio struggled to build her image. Pola was a new quantity. She was Hollywood’s first explicitly foreign star. A lot of effort was put into assuaging the xenophobia of American movie fans, while also highlighting her exotic nature. (Yes. In 1921, Poles were exotic.) If you recall from the Theda Bara post, in the early days of the star system the performer’s star image tied directly into the roles they played. If Negri was going to play all these femmes fatales from “the East” they couldn’t couldn’t wholly whitewash her Slavic ancestry. She’s quoted as saying at the time:

“They do not understand me. I am a child of my race, a Slav. I have no the restraint of the Anglo-Saxon.”

Essentially, Hollywood worked out the kinks of developing foreign stars for the American market with Pola. Pola was out there paving the way for Garbo once again.

Of course, Pola’s American career wasn’t a complete mess. She still made popular films–notably blockbuster Hotel Imperial (1927), directed by Garbo’s first champion, Mauritz Stiller. Pola and Paramount struggled to manage her image regardless of box office successes. Finding the line between the dramatic emotionality of Pola��s characters and the dramatic emotionality of the actress herself was difficult. A series of missteps regarding her relationship with Rudolph Valentino and his untimely death and then her untimely marriage to an impoverished Russian prince put her in a tough spot. On top of all that, talking pictures were roaring into theaters and there was likely concern about Pola’s viability as a talkie star.

But, after her divorce from said prince, Pola faced the microphone and surprisingly it was her singing that revived her faltering career. With the success of the song “Paradise” from A Woman Commands (1932), Pola hopped back over to Europe where she resumed working for the studio that made her a star: UFA. If you know anything about Germany in the 1930s, you can probably predict that these years were complicated for Pola. Hitler was fond of her work, even though her Aryanness couldn’t be proven. Pola arranged to live in France while working for UFA, but it was an arrangement built to bust. In 1938, she returned to the US and chose semi-retirement from film. Pola was getting older and the Vamp archetype that was originally her bread and butter had gone stale. In the end, I feel that many of Pola’s Vamps are the branching off point for the femmes fatales we know and loves from films noir of the 1940s and 50s.

To me, it says so much about who Pola was that she was always so willing to walk away from film. She didn’t seem to have much invested in being a huge star. Not that there’s anything wrong with that drive, but it’s such a modern-seeming departure from how film stars were managed and presented by studios in early Hollywood. Pola’s star image may have been centered on her exoticism, but it’s her fierce independence that I find so compelling.

Learn How to Get the Look BELOW THE JUMP

The Costume

Number one most important thing with a Pola costume: do not dress up as a stereotypical representation of a Romani woman. Just don’t. There’s a lot more to pull from that isn’t insulting an entire ethnic group.

The Makeup

Pola’s trademark is her heavy lids. Carve out a distinct shape with your eyes and use a dark shade almost up to your eyebrows. Use colors by all means, especially a shade that might make your eyes look deeper. For me, that’s using another shade of green. For you, it might be a blue or brown or purple. Now Pola regularly sported a glossy eye, which absolutely adds to the heavy lid look. Glossy lids, regardless of which product you’re using, is not going to last long. If you’re going out in this costume, you might want to opt for a fine shimmer as I did. That way, you won’t have to worry about touch ups.

Pola’s eye makeup somehow looks both mournful and judgmental. She’s somehow always looking down her nose at you even if she’s looking out from under her eyebrows.

The eyebrows should be distinctly drawn in though not super thick and curved to match  Heavy lids, long curved eyebrows. Like Theda Bara, leave the blush behind. Pola also had a beauty mark under her left eye that she often drew in for high contrast. I drew one on using the same dark brown shade I used on my brows.

As for lips, go with a thin silhouette and focus more on a sharp shape than a soft pout. Pola often wears a gloss over her lipstick–likely almond oil or petroleum jelly.

The Hair

Pola most often stuck to curly or wavy bobs. In some films Pola leans more toward a lob, which is trendy today, so you very well might have the appropriate hair cut already! I think I would do a full wet set if I were to tackle this look again, but I think the curling wand did an okay job. How neat you want to make the waves or curls is totally dependent on which film you want to mimic. I was going for Die Bergkatze / The Wildcat (1920) so unruly was the way to go.

Of course, Pola was high-key into turbans and headscarves. So, that’s an option.

The Clothes

This is where Pola makes it easy on modern imitators. She has a great range of (non-appropriative) costumes to choose from. I tried to recreate her mountain-dwelling attire from The Wildcat. But if you go back and look at her dance costume from Bestia (seen above), she rocks a very modern-looking gothy look. So, I’d recommend checking out a few of her films (some of her work with Lubitsch is currently on Filmstruck *nudge* *nudge*) then look in your closet and make an adventure of it. And remember, nothing is too over the top for Pola.

Read Part Two

[seanpatricklittlewriter]

The Final Blog Post of 2020

Greetings, friends. It has been a while. 

I think, as it has been for so many of us, 2020 is going down as a year where I accomplished pretty much nothing.I had big things planned for 2020, as I am sure a lot of you did, and they just… did not happen. Most of the downhill slide started in March, when I accepted a third-shift job. My body did not respond well to working third shift, and it sapped me of just about any will do to anything. I spent my days asleep, and my nights hovering through a weird twilight state where I was awake and doing things, but I was not happy about it. On my days off, I could barely function, and I started getting little fits of narcolepsy. After a doctor’s appointment, I mentioned these issues, and the doctor told me that someone who has the sort of thyroid and metabolic conditions that I have should not work third shift because it throws my whole system into whack. 

So, I’m looking for a new job, a better job (hopefully), and something that I actually look forward to doing. If nothing else, I’ve learned that money isn’t as important as actually enjoying your work.But, with this job, and the pandemic, of course, all my routines were knocked out and I have been struggling to figure out a new routine. I used to be able to write at home back when I lived in rented apartments. Since I bought a home, I’ve found it difficult. There is always something around the house that needs doing. I found a refuge at my local Culver’s restaurant. I’d go in, get a diet Mt. Dew to drink, and kick over 3-5 hours in my favorite booth grinding out pages. Now, with that not exactly being a favorable option, my writing output has decreased to almost nothing. A sentence here. Maybe a page or two, if I was lucky. The inability to generate a solid routine has made the story harder to solidify in my mind. So, it’s been a rough year is what I’m saying. 

I’m still kicking, though.

As is traditional, I like to list a few things that I found that brought me some joy this year and share them with you, as maybe you might like them, too.

Movies:

--I have not watched a ton of movies this year. The last movie I saw in a theater was “1917,” which I enjoyed greatly. It was an excellent WWI film, and the fact that they made it look like it was done in a single take was a masterstroke. It was beautifully filmed, and almost every frame could be a painting. Well worth the time. 

I also just watched “Soul” on Disney+. There was a lot reminiscent of “Inside Out” in “Soul,” but “Soul” was a much quieter, more existential film. I liked it a lot, but it wasn’t one of Pixar’s best outings. 

I watched George Clooney’s “The Midnight Sky” the other day. It was a long, dreadfully slow, and ultimately pointless film. I did not care for it. Most of the other films I’ve watched this year were fairly forgettable. 

They were titles on streaming services that have been out a few years, but never generated a lot of noise. 

Television: 

I watched a ton of television this year. What the hell else was I going to do, right? I’m sure most of you are in the same boat. Anyhow, I have long believed that TV has become superior to films in the last few years. Better characters, better stories, and the time to tell those stories. I prefer episodic television to just about anything film has given us in the past few years, so here’s what I was watching this year.

--“19-2” (purchase four season on Amazon Prime):  If you’ve watched “Letterkenny” on Hulu, then you must be familiar with Jared Keeso, who plays the central character Wayne. Keeso won some awards for a Canadian cop drama called “19-2” before he made “Letterkenny,” and I can understand why. This is a fairly dark, but realistic cop drama about the 19th Precinct in Montreal, Quebec, Canada, and deals with the new guy (Keeso) transferring into the precinct from a small town and dealing with his new partner (Adrian Holmes) and the rest of the flawed members of the station in addition to dealing with policing duties around the city. One thing I liked about the series is that it never got away from the day-to-day grind of policing in a big city. The characters’ story arcs had to be worked in around the calls and patrols. The first episode of the second season of “19-2” deals with the precinct responding to a school shooting. It is, by far, one of the finest hours of television I’ve ever seen. Chaotic and hurried, brutal and bloody. It’s everything that keeps your eyes glued to the set. There were only 38 episodes of “19-2,” but I could have watched another four seasons of it. It supplanted “The Shield” as my favorite cop drama. Well worth the time.

--“The Queen’s Gambit” (Netflix): I’m not going to add anything original to this that hasn’t already been written by other people. This highly lauded limited series was well-written and acted, and it actually made competitive chess interesting. Anna Taylor-Joy was excellent in the lead role, and the costumes and sets were fantastic.

--“The Uncanny Counter” (Netflix): My mother watches an insane amount of South Korean TV shows. I don’t know why. She is the butt of many jokes because of this. However, “The Uncanny Counter” is a pretty cool series that feels like an indie comic book. The premise is a group of Grim Reapers run a noodle shop and fight demons. However, the show is much more complex than that. The characters’ stories are all intertwined in odd ways, and it’s very watchable. 

--“Hospital Playlist” (Netflix): Another show my mother suggested was the sappy, and almost twee hospital show “Hospital Playlist.” This show is a fairly soft, airy, and cute little hospital drama about five doctors who have been friends since medical school. They’re all heads of their respective departments now, and they work at the Yulje Medical Center. While the show centers around the five main characters, there’s a whole slate of other doctors and interns who add to the story. Inevitably, the show is about life, love, and death—like any other hospital drama. However, the core group of friends also get together once a week and play music to relax, so there is a cutesy pop song at the end of the episodes that plays into a montage of that week’s story wrapping up. The characters in the show are very likeable, and that’s about the best thing this show has going for it. Each episode is like 90 minutes, and there are 12 episodes in the first season, but I watched them all, and I hate to admit it, but I’m interested in seeing what season 2 will bring.

--“Upload” (Amazon Prime): Greg Daniels of “The Office” fame created and produced this series about the Singularity, a hypothetical point in the future when we will be able to merge our consciousness with a computer, and thus physical death will mean we have a chance to live a digital afterlife where we can still interact with our loved ones on the earthly plane through VR. The show is funny and extremely intelligent. It’s satire and commentary wrapped up in a solid existential premise. 

--“Star Trek: Discovery” season 3 (CBS All Access): I’m not going to write a ton about ST:Disco, but I will say that season 3 is the first season that felt like “Star Trek” to me. It’s one of the few shows that I have actually looked forward to week-to-week.

--“The Mandalorian” season 2 (Disney+): Like ST:Disco, this is one of the few shows I actually looked forward to. The first couple of episodes felt like the series was in a bit of a rut, but the last three episodes made it all worthwhile. Total fanboy moments abounded. 

--“Ted Lasso” (Apple+TV): Strangely enough, a sitcom based on a single-premise joke from a series of Superbowl ads from a couple years ago is, hands-down, my favorite new show of 2020. Jason Sudeikis of SNL fame plays Ted Lasso, the former head coach of the Wichita Shockers college football team who is hired to be the head coach of FC Richmond, a Premier League Football team in England. Initially Ted is hired by the new owner of Richmond, who happened to have won the team from her ex-husband in a messy divorce. Her initial goal is to have Ted unknowingly destroy the team, but Ted’s boundless optimism and true concern and care for his players flips the script. This is the show that 2020 needed. It is funny and joyous, and it’s another feather in Bill Lawrence’s (Scrubs, Spin City, etc…) cap. I watched this show out of a sense of loyalty to Bill Lawrence, but I ended up LOVING it. The fact that Apple renewed “Ted Lasso” for two more seasons immediately is very telling about how good this show was. Highly, highly recommend.

Music: 

I barely listened to anything new this year. Not many bands I liked came out with a new record, and I was usually listening to podcasts or watching TV instead. However, there were two albums that came out year that I would note.

--Kyle Kinane, “Trampoline in a Ditch”: Kinane’s newest stand-up album, recorded in Madison, Wis., is a fun jaunt through Kinane’s weird sense of humor and excellent writing style. This record had me and my daughter laughing out loud on the day it came out, and I’ve listened to it several times since. Kinane’s writing is so good, I pick up subtle jokes on additional listenings. 

--Brett Newski, “Don’t Let the Bastards Get You Down”:  Milwaukee Dork Rocker Newski put out another solid album this year. Check out the video for “Wha’d Ya Got to Lose?”

Podcasts:

Spent a ton of time listening to podcasts at my third shift job. I’m not going to write a ton about them individually, but here’s the list of the podcasts that got the most listens from me:

--Gilbert Gottfried’s Amazing, Colossal Podcast --Fake Doctors, Real Friends --Timesuck --Scared to Death --Office Ladies --Unexplained --Lore --Cabinet of Curiosities --Haunted Locations

Books:

I probably read the fewest books I’ve read in ages this year. I’m usually good for 20-40 books a year, and this year—I just did not get there. I maybe read 12 books this year, and that bothers me. I just could not focus on reading. However, much of what I did read, I enjoyed. The best of those are as follows: --Craig Johnson, “Next to Last Stand” --CJ Box, “Winterkill” --Joe Ide, “IQ” --Sebastien de Castell, “Crownbreaker” --Douglas Preston & Lincoln Child, “Crooked River” Anyhow, I hope some of those media suggestions will bring you some joy. We sure could all use some in 2021, no doubt. In the meantime, do continue to stay safe and healthy. Take precautions. Don’t throw caution to the wind. My plans for 2021:  --Lose weight (as usual) --Finish the second Abe & Duff novel --Maybe finish another of the several novels on my desktop --Get a job I don’t hate --Make it to 2022 Here’s to hoping I have some good news about Abe & Duff in 2021. Thanks for reading, and Happy New Year. --Sean 

[unnursvanablog]

All the movies I watched in 2020.

Not a long list, because I am much more of a tv show person than a movie person. Months can pass and I suddenly realize I have not watch any movies.

The Farewell: An amazing and quiet little family story. The premise of this movie is so simple, yet it works so well. It's just amazing.

Hustlers: I liked it very much, and yet I have very few words to say about it for some reason.

Jojo Rabbit: Funny, sincere and thoughtful all at the same time. I really enjoyed it and how Taika Waititi uses humor to tell his stories. It's just so masterfully done.

Memories of Murder: Interesting and exciting, but by no means my favorite Bong Joon Ho movie. I am not that into crime-thrillers, so that might be it.

Little Women: Made me cry, just like all the other adaptations of Little Women. It was a new and interesting way to tell a very classic story. I really liked it a lot.

Portrait of Lady on Fire: A really interesting story. It hooked me right from the start. I loved how slow and quiet it was, yet so impactful.

The Hustle: I had to google what movie it was, because I had forgotten it. Says it all about that movie, huh? I do not like the humor that Rebel Wilson has and this movie is just riddled with that.

Gone Girl: It was interesting, but I did not find it that entertaining.

P.s. I Still Love You: I forgot this movie was released this year. Not as cute or fun as the first one. I felt like it lacked some of the charm the first one had. Not as re-watchable.

Tune in for Love: I loved this little romance story. I remember really enjoying it, yet I have very little to say about it.

Monsters: The idea was there, but the result was not up to par with what I had hoped. A decent popcorn flick, but it's often difficult to turn a monster movie into something more than just an empty battle-sequences with monsters with a interesting narrative, in my opinion.

Harry Potter 4: I watched it with my little niece after she finished the book. Idk, I still love this film. (also, this was before Terfy Rowling was a thing)

Guns Akimbo: I thought Daneil Radcliffe was really funny in it, it had some great dark humor, but gun fights is just something I get bored watching.

Emma: It delivered on everything that the trailer had promised me; Colorful, funny and a little weird. I really enjoyed it.

1917: I could quite see why people find this film amazing. It was beautifully shot. The story didn't really captivate me.

Bright Star: I found it a little too slow in parts. Beautiful to look at though.

Stardust: Ah, the perfect fantasy movie in my opinion.

The Great Battle: I had to google what movie this was, so it was not that memorable. An okay war movie, did not relate to the characters that much and it felt a little too long.

Kim Jiyoung, Born 1984: They changed the story a little from the book and made the husband a little less of a jerk to me. Did not have quite the same effect as the book did, but it was still good.

Time to Hunt: I got pretty bored while watching this movie. Watching some boys in a gang and their fraudulent activities and gunfights between them and the bad guys is just not something I usually enjoy watching.

The Fellowship of the Ring: Ah, what a classic. These movies age so well.

Eurovision: Fire Story: I liked the songs, I hated the story and Will Farrel and I do not have similar type of humor. I just find him boring and obnoxious.

Hamilton: It was incredibly cool and well-executed, I did find my attention slip a couple of times, as it is very long. Can I see why people have been hyping this up all these years? yes. Seeing this live would have been amazing.

Two Towers: What can I say? These are amazing movies that age so well. I enjoyed this so much. I don't do a lot of re-watching, so when I do and I enjoy it it feels like a treat.

The Love Birds: Had to google it, so not that memorable. A good comedy, but nothing really outside of the box.

Return of the King: Seeing this movie in theaters was amazing! I cried my eyes out during the ending, and it's really amazing how well these movies age.

Prince Caspian: My favorite Narnia movie. It doesn't follow the book very well, but I like it so much.

Old Guards: I loved the backstories and the more mythical part of the story behind it all. But gun fights just aren't exciting for me to watch. The last part was all that.

#Alive: I found the first half really interesting, but the second half ends up being a pretty typical zombie movie that I've seen so many times before.

The Odd Family - Zombie on Sale: Omg, this movie. I loved it! How it mixes humor and horror without neither of those elements overshadowing each other or anything was amazing. I had an incredible time watching it, I liked pretty much all of the characters, I laughed out loud a few times (and that is rare for me) and the story managed to be really exciting on top of that. What a good movie!

Train to Busan: This movie is kinda amazing no matter how often you watch it. There is just something that really works in this movie. It takes advantage of the genre it is set it, the space where the stories takes place, and does something new with it. The plot is great, it's intense and sad when it needs to be. A fun time!

Penninsula: oh boy.... this movie was an empty thriller that adds nothing to the movie that came before it and nothing new to the zombie-horro-genre. It truly was everything that Train to Busan wasn't. It was not good.

Seel Rain: This is such a good thriller. The performance of the actors is really good, it has some humor, it has some heart, and it even managed to surprise me on a second watch.

Steel Rain 2: I loved the beginning and the middle of this movie, as the relationship between the three presidents who are stuck in a submarine together was really fascinating and fun to watch. When the plot looses that element it becomes rather a formulaic thriller. Yoo Yeon Seok is the best part of the movie.

Mulan (1998): I love this movie, by far one of the best Disney movies. I watched it in English this time, so some of the jokes were not as funny to me in English as they are in Icelandic... in my memory.

Mulan (2020): oh my, this was something. All the warmth, all the emotions and all the humor from the original film was just not present in this one. It just seemed so empty.

The Mummy: It's weird to watch a movie that is so beloved, it's quotes a lot, but it's not a part of your nostalgia so something about it feels lost to you. There is this pressure to like something that is so well loved, and often I have seen references to these movies and I feel like I have already seen it, when I finally see it. I liked it well enough, but I also felt this disconnect to it.

Double Worlds: She looked much more fun that it was. The plot was not good, nothing that happened seemed to matter and for me it seemed just pretty empty and full of CGI that looked cool enough but didn't add a thing to it.

The Craft: It's always nice when you watch a well-loved film and you really enjoy yourself while watching it.

Coraline: I can't believe it took me so long to watch this movie. I still knew the story quite well even though I had not seen it so little about it surprised me.

The Divine Fury: I thought it was a little too long and a bit all of the place at times. I thought it started well, but by the end I was getting pretty bored.

The Babysitters Guide to Monster Hunting: I thought it was silly but in a way that kinda works for this story. Good fun, if you do not dig too much into the plot.

The Personal History of David Copperfield: Dev Patel is awesome in this role and the tone of the film itself is rather whimsical, which I enjoyed. Judging by the trailer, I expected it to be funnier, but we can't have everything.

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl: This movie is a classic. At least for people my age. Everything about it just kinda works: The humor, the story, the characters, battles. She's just so good.

The Call: A really interesting storyline and the idea behind it is really cool. I thoroughly enjoyed it, it surprised me a few times, although I found the ending a bit confusing.

The Prom: The decent musical. I found it rather sweet, the songs were fun and most of the actors in it were nice. I had a fun time watchin it.

Jingle Jangle: A very cute family Christmas movie. I adored the costumes and the sets. The songs were really good. I thought it dragged on a bit sometimes, but it was still really cute and wholesome.

Guernsey Litarary and Potato Peel Society: This is just a really well made costume drama. I was not bored to watch it again.

Parasite: It's just as spectacular to watch this movie the second time watching it, or third, as it was watching it for the first time. The sequence of events is so gripping that it had me on the each of my seat as I was excited to experience all those things again.

[denise-major-dodge]

We’ve all seen the commercials where they talk about how gold is on the rise, and coins are as well. When I see those commercials I wonder how expensive can a coin really become? And WHY? I’m not a financial expert, but I decided to do a little research and try to learn a thing or two.

My father-in-law collects coins and gets extremely excited about them. He always shares his new finds with me and explains why they are so special. Each time my interest peaks, because it IS really fascinating stuff, and who doesn’t want to educate themselves on another way to increase their personal wealth? I hope I found some coins you’ll be interested investing in and owning.

Please feel free to comment your thoughts and knowledge below!

So, here we are. I found the top 10 most expensive collectors coins I could find as of August 26, 2017. Enjoy!!

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10. 1898 Barber Quarter PF-69 CAMEO NGC Quarter PF-69 NGC

“For the price of a fairly new, middle-class vehicle, you can own and invest in this gorgeous and unique coin that features Lady Liberty wearing a Phrygian cap and laurel wreath on one side, and displays an eagle with outstretched wings, a shield at its chest holding a banner in its beak, while holding an olive branch and a cluster of arrows in its talons.”

Yes that was a very long sentence. Basically it’s an American quarter with a very fancy image on both sides, and has never been used officially as currency in exchange for goods.

You know that it hasn’t been used and carried frivolously in someone’s pocket because its encapsulation by NGC guarantees and protects the condition of the coin.

Also, the coin was apparently designed by Charles Barber. If you don’t know who Charles Barber is, I did a little google search for the both of us. Charles Barber was the sixth Chief Engraver of the United States Mint from 1879 until his death in 1917. Many of Barber coins were melted for bullion when silver prices rose in the late 1970s and early 1980s. Which makes this piece even more valuable.

This coin is one of Charles Barber’s most famous and sought after designs by coin enthusiasts. If you have the money to spend, my research explains that this coin will not stop climbing in value. So you pay $46,752.67 today for the coin and its value is expected to increase consistently as the years pass by. It’s a worthy investment if you have the money to invest in it. For the most up to date price, visit the listing on Amazon by clicking here.

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09. Gold & Brilliant Uncirculated 1995 AU Australia 1 kilo Gold Nugget BU

This coin is so beautiful and lovely. It’s not only a very smart investment but would make a fantastic show piece. One of the interesting things about the Australian Gold Nugget is that the image changes every year. This specific coin was the 1995 design, and the detail on it is breathtaking.

You can see the item for sale on Amazon. Through their store app or website you can zoom in and really analyze the details of this coin.

If you get a chance to look, check out the crown on the Queen’s head. It’s like an image out of a fairy tale!

These coins are not expected to ever drop in value. This coin is extremely limited, hard to find, and is a bargain for what you will receive back from it as time moves forward. It’s currently available for $52,813.80 and in time that number WILL keep climbing.

08. 1861 Clark Gruber & Co $20 Liberty Gold Double Eagle XF-40 PCGS G$20 XF-40 PCGS

“Coin Highlights: Exact mintage figure is unknown U.S. Population of {$Population} coins at this grade level with {$GradedHigher} graded higher U.S. PCGS encapsulation guarantees the coin’s XF-40 condition U.S. Coins from the Philadelphia Mint do not feature a mintmark. Showcase your certified Clark Gruber & Co $20 Liberty Gold Double Eagle by adding a presentation box to your order U.S. This 1861 Clark Gruber & Co $20 Liberty Gold Double Eagle has been certified as XF-40 by PCGS one of the top two coin grading services. This coin has a population of only {$Population} coins!”

According to CoinWorld.com gold miners could visit the firm’s facility in Denver and trade their gold dust and nuggets into a usable currency, like the 1861 Clark Gruber & Co $20 Liberty Gold Double Eagle XF-40 PCGS.

CoinWorld.com also explains the coin is graded Extremely Fine 40 by Professional Coin Grading Service. As Scotsman notes in its description, Clark, Gruber & Co. coins serve as representatives of the “relatively brief periods of optimism when miners set out toward the west to ‘strike it rich.’ ” The privately issued gold coin, collected under the category of pioneer gold (also called private and territorial gold) and described as having “brassy luster” and “smooth and slightly glossy fields,” is all yours for $58,561.18.

07. 1876 Pattern Dollar PR-65 Cameo $1 PR-65 NGC

Coin Highlights: Struck in Copper. Population of {$Population} coin at this grade level with {$GradedHigher} graded higher. NGC encapsulation guarantees the coin’s PR-65 Cameo (Red) condition. Coins from the Philadelphia Mint do not feature a mintmark. Showcase your certified Lemus Collection Pattern by adding a presentation box to your order. Add this 1876 Lemus Collection Pattern Dollar graded PR-65 Cameo (Red) by NGC to your cart today!

This is a truly unique coin that I would have fun showing off. The art work featured on both sides has a very vintage appeal covered in a lovely copper color. I love the detail on the crown showing the word “LIBERTY” and the detail in the strands of hair being pulled back. The other side is a very simple wreath with the words “ONE DOLLAR” in the center. Even the wreath has very delicate attributes that are hard not to appreciate. This 1876 Pattern Dollar is extremely fun to look at and analyze. The value of this coin is $58,667.56 and will make a worthy addition to either start or add to your investments or coin collection.

06. 1833 $5 Gold Capped Head Half Eagle AU-58 NGC (Lg Date, Block-8) G$5 AU-58 NGC

Coin Highlights: This coin has a mintage of 193 630. This 1833 $5 Gold Capped Head Half Eagle has been certified as AU-58 by NGC, one of the top two coin grading services. This coin has a population of only 1 coin! NGC encapsulation guarantees the coin’s AU-58 condition. Coins from the Philadelphia Mint do not feature a mintmark. Showcase your certified $5 Gold Capped Head Half Eagle by adding a presentation box to your order when you check out with Amazon.

Here is an even older coin than the one I showed you previously in #07. Another thing I really love about coins is its a valuable piece of art that displays the changes that have happened through time.

If you compare this 1833 Gold Capped Head Half Eagle to the previous 1876 Pattern Dollar you’ll notice quite a difference in the design of liberty’s face. The hair is fashioned differently, instead of a crown it looks like a head wrap that says “LIBERTY,” and the face is more Greek looking in my opinion.

Obviously, different times, different design, different appeal, etc… but observing the changes is the fun part! As for investing in this coin, it’s currently on sale for $67,976.08 and is showing growth in its worth. To get the most up to date price of this coin visit Amazon.

05. 1776 Continental Currency Dollar AU-53 PCGS $1 AU-53 PCGS

Coin Highlights: Exact mintage is unknown. PCGS encapsulation guarantees the coin’s AU-53 condition. Struck in Pewter. This Colonial Coin has a denomination of $1.00. Showcase your certified Continental Currency Dollar by adding a presentation box to your order.

This coin is SO RARE I can’t believe it’s for sale. There’s NOT MANY of them still in existence today.

A coin very similar to this (the difference was it was struck in silver) was sold for $1.41 million at auction May 16, 2014 by Heritage Auctions. This particular pewter version is available for only $73,986.72. Drastically easier to afford than the silver version, but still a worthy investment. This coin connects us to the beginnings of our country; the United States of America.

Another very interesting thing about this coin is that there are two different pewter coins of the same year. One has the word spelled “CURENCY” and the other is spelled “CURRENCY” with two R’s. There is also ONE MORE version where they really screwed up and stamped it as “CURRENCEY.” This particular coin I’m sharing with you that’s for sale, has the word currency correctly spelled.

PCGSCoinFacts.com states “While no known authorization for the Continental “Dollars” is known, it is believed that they were made for the Continental Congress to be used as circulating currency, much as the similar paper currency. In fact, the fractional denominations of the paper currency dated February 17th, 1776 used the same designs as on these 1776 Continental “Dollars”.”

There is this very interesting image on one side and words that reads “FUGIO. MIND YOUR BUSINESS” I personally don’t know what that means. If you know I’d love for you to share it. There’s more information than I can share in this article. It’s one of those coins that every coin collector makes goals of obtaining one day, and never stops providing insight into the past.

04. 1652 Pine Tree Shilling MS-64 NGC (Small Pine Tree) Piece MS-64 NGC

Coin Highlights: Exact mintage figure is unknown. Population of 4 coin’s at this grade level with none graded higher. NGC encapsulation guarantees the coin’s MS-64 condition. This coin does not feature a mintmark. Showcase your certified Pine Tree Shilling by adding a presentation box to your order when you checkout on Amazon.

This is the oldest coin I’m sharing with you today on this top 10 list. It’s a very interesting coin that clearly and artistically expresses the more primitive engraving tools they had to use to create these little coins. Its age, 1652, also contributes to its value and only with time will this extremely rare coin continuously to GROW in value. If you’re interested in purchasing something you know there is very few of still in existence… THIS IS THE COIN TO INVEST IN.

I love observing the art work. There is a dainty little tree with roots on one side, and the other side reads AN DO NEW ENGLAND 1652 XII. PCGSCoinFacts.com shares, “In 1652, John Hull began striking silver coins bearing an image of a pine tree on the obverse and the date and denomination on the reverse.  This design followed Hull’s “Oak Tree” design.”

03. 1854 O $3 New Orleans Gold Princess MS-62 NGC MS-62 NGC

Coin Highlights: This coin has a mintage of 24 000. Population of 1 coin at this grade level with 0 graded higher. NGC encapsulation guarantees the coin’s MS-62 condition. Coins from the New Orleans mint feature the “O” mintmark.

What is REALLY awesome about this coin is that according to PCGSCoinFacts.com this particular coin is worth $85,000.00 according to their price guide. Through Amazon you can have this beautiful, unique and highly valuable coin for only $82,125.02 with free shipping. You’re saving OVER $2,800.00! Below is an image of the coin ready to ship.

It’s an alluring coin with a beautiful history behind it, and would make a very smart addition to ANY coin collection.

02. 1810 $5 Turban Head Gold Half Eagle Lg Date, Lg 5 MS-65 NGC G$5 MS-65 NGC

One of the reasons it’s called the Turban Head is because of the head dressing on Liberty. On one side of the coin Liberty is facing right, and is wearing a turban female cap that was popular during that era. US-COIN-VALUES-ADVISOR.com explains in regards to this coin, “Good luck on finding one for sale, but from time to time, one does come up, usually inviting a lot of competition from serious collectors.” Well guess what, right now, that coin is available for $103,454.81. Get it while its hot!

01. 1821 $5 Gold Capped Head Half Eagle AU-53 NGC G$5 AU-53 NGC

Coin Highlights: This coin has a mintage of 34 641. NGC encapsulation guarantees the coin’s AU-53 condition. Coins from the Philadelphia Mint do not feature a mintmark.

  Last but not least, one of the rarest and THE most expensive coin I could find. I present the 1821 Gold Capped Head Half Eagle. $147,390.98

  Top 10 Rare Coins You Can Invest In And Own Today We've all seen the commercials where they talk about how gold is on the rise, and coins are as well.