#and my dad made sure to get my grandma's piano after she passed away which i have a lot of emotional attachment to so im very relieved

[pheonix-inside]

Decided that one day I'm gonna get the Undertale piano book bc I wanna get back into playing piano anyway and I wanna learn how to read sheet music better. Both for theater/choir stuff and my own music endeavors. What better way to do both things than use my special interest as a motivator.

Also I like showing off and knowing how to play a song on an instrument is really satisfying (I know this both from the few songs I do know how to play on the piano and my recent attempts at playing the ukulele).

Plus my family owns like three pianos at this point it's not like I wouldn't be able to learn.

[yutahoes]

Punch

pairing : bodyguard! Yuta Nakamoto x rich girl! Y/N

genre: angst, fluff, childhood friends au

word count: 2.7k words

summary : Yuta has his eyes on one girl. A person he cannot have. 

a/n: based on this ask. you’ll probably guess that I intended this to be an angst fic so the ending is kinda off but I still hope you’ll like it anon.  

“Can you please act like a proper lady?” the mother of the house scolded which only made Y/N sip her soup loudly. “Y/N!” she shouted, which made the younger girl flinch. 

The oldest sighed loudly, closing his eyes. “Can’t we just enjoy our meal without shouting?” The younger girl snickered. “And Y/N, please listen to your mom. Act like a proper lady.”

She rolled her eyes at that. It’s not like she’s not an obedient child, she listens to what they want. She just hated how they put all this pressure on her to be a proper woman when it’s not what she wants. The disadvantage of being born into a rich family. 

Her right wrapped fist hit the punching bag before her left fist hooked to hit its side. The door opened and she swings a punch, only to hit her childhood friend by the shoulder. “That is one weak punch.” Yuta teased, fixing the wrap of her right fist. “Why do you have to practice boxing when you have your bodyguard?” He whispered while fixing the other wrap. “I’d rather break all my bones than let someone lay a finger on you.”   

She laughed. “For someone so strong and muscly, you have such a soft spot for me.” She swing another punch and he quickly dodged it. Yuta held her wrist, gently pulling her to the side but Y/N kept on coming to him with punches. She hit his shoulder once but he didn’t flinch making her repeat the punching.  

Yuta stepped backward, laughing at her attempts. His foot reached the edge of the mat at the same time as Y/N landed a punch on his chest. He fell down on his back, dragging Y/N with him. The girl grinned, “I think I just knocked you down.” 

She sounded so proud of herself that it’s comical. Yuta held both her arms, pushing her down to the mat. Him, hovering above her. “The first rule is to never put your guard down.” He can feel her warm breath against his lips. Her fruity smell arousing his senses. A loud heartbeat, he wasn’t sure if it was hers or his, ringing on his ears. 

Yuta stood up as if he’s on fire. Y/N chuckling while lying down on the mat. He reached a hand to help her stand, letting go when she stood up. “Luckily, you will always be here for me.” The side of his lips curled up. 

He didn’t know when it started. Maybe it started even before he realized it. Since his parents work with her family, he became her first friend. When she went to high school, she refused to have bodyguards following her every move so Yuta, being her classmate, became her personal bodyguard. The main reason why he bulked up. 

But it should end now. He can’t be her personal bodyguard forever. Because from the little girl he first met when they were six years old, Y/N had grown to be a pretty woman. And he’s just a guy. A guy who is attracted to the person he needed to guard. 

-----

“I’m sorry,” Y/N said, holding her shoes while running outside their mansion and into the car. Yuta laughed, closing the door behind him then entering the driver’s seat. “Is mom mad?” 

He shook his head, adjusting the rearview mirror to watch if she’s comfortable in her seat. She was putting on her sandals, the skirt of her dress hiking up her thigh that made him cough. “If she asks, just tell her your piano class ended late.” 

“But I don’t have piano classes.” 

“Exactly.” 

The girl smiled. This was one of the things she liked about hanging out with Yuta. Her parents believe him more than her and he’s good at making up excuses. 

It’s not her fault that she enjoyed watching the boxing match on TV and she forgot about the party that her mom kept on reminding her. Honestly, she would rather just stay at home and practice her boxing skills rather than stand in that posh party and act like her mom’s Barbie doll. Why is this the fate of a chaebol’s daughter? 

The car stopped at the entrance of a posh hotel, the valet already opening the door for her. “Are you coming up after parking the car?” she asked but Yuta just shook his head while reminding her to keep her slippers on the side so he can hide them in the trunk. “What if I get bored?” 

Yuta chuckled. “I’ll be drinking coffee in the lobby.” She grinned before getting out of the car and closing the door behind her. 

The elevator ride is boring already but when she came inside the venue, the party made her yawn. Her mom scolded her for arriving late then smiling at her friends which she greeted with a fake smile on her face. She introduced her to one bachelor after another, obnoxious jerks that she knew since she’s a kid. “Didn’t I told you to wear makeup?” Her mom scolded and she hissed, closing her eyes. She’s pissed off that she’s hungry and her feet are aching real bad. She just wanted to go home. 

Maybe she can make a run for it and go to Yuta in the lobby. 

But her mom held her arm, whispering that she should stop being a brat. It wasn’t until her dad said that they should go home since he’s almost drunk that a smile crept on her lips. She almost hurried outside the hotel, grinning when Yuta opened the door for her. ��You look like you had fun.” 

She rolled her eyes at that, “I almost died of boredom.” He chuckled before she got inside the car, Yuta opening the front door for Y/N’s dad. 

The car was quiet that surprised him. Normally, her mom will keep on scolding her for her behavior at the party. Maybe she was being obedient today. “Yuta, your dad told me about your family leaving.” He saw movement from the rearview mirror and shrugged it. “Let me know if you need anything.” Yuta nodded, thanking the older man. 

“We know some doctors in Japan. Maybe we can help.” The older woman from the backseat claimed but Yuta just shook his head. He already feels bad about his family moving so suddenly, he’ll feel worse if he let them help his ailing grandmother. This was a decision that his parents had been pondering for a while and when their employer agreed to let them go back to Japan, he can’t say no. 

The car stopped in front of their mansion, the couple getting out of the car but the girl refused to move and even closed the door of the car. She was glaring at Yuta, arms crossed in front of her chest. “Why didn’t you tell me that you’re leaving?” 

Yuta sighed. “I can’t find the right timing to tell you.” She rolled her eyes once again. “I’m sorry but grandma is already old and she wants us to go back to Japan.” 

“Can’t you stay?” 

“I can’t, Y/N.” He hissed. “My parents are already old. They need me more.” 

The girl pursed her lips and he cautiously met her eyes from the rearview mirror. “When are you leaving?” 

“Tomorrow.” 

“Already?” Yuta nodded. The sooner, the better. “Morning?” Again, he nodded. Y/N pouted, squinting her eyes at him. “Can you wake me up before you leave?” 

He smiled, laughing while he turned to her. “You can wake up by yourself.” But she shook her head. “I’ll wake you up tomorrow. Promise.” She grinned, even repeating that he needed to wake her up before leaving the car. 

Yuta sighed, leaning in his seat while taking a silver chain from inside his pocket. His thumb tracing the heart pendant. This was supposed to be his gift for her but seeing as how the other guys from wealthy families gave her diamonds and expensive things, he hid it for months. A knock on the window startled him, hastily putting the necklace in his pocket. He rolled down the window to reveal his dad, smiling at him. “I’ll just park the car.” 

He waited for him outside the mansion as he returned the keys, closing their door in the process. “You know you can stay if you want.” His dad started that made Yuta shake his head. It was his decision to come with them. He can’t stay here and be away from them. They needed him. “I’m sorry, Yuta.” 

“What for, dad?” 

“I should have worked harder and maybe our family is wealthier.” He claimed that surprised the younger guy. His dad is thinking about these things? “You wouldn’t have a problem loving her.” 

A smile crept on Yuta’s face. Of course, they know about it. Everyone does. Except her. 

“It was your mom who found out. You even worked part-time jobs just to get her a present and I felt bad.” Yuta shook his head. They’re the parents he wished for. He doesn’t want anything to change. “Did you at least tell her your feelings?” 

Once again, he shook his head. “It’s just a one-sided crush, dad.” The older tapped his shoulder. “This will pass.” But even he had a hard time believing the words coming out of his own mouth. 

He promised to wake her up and although he’s in front of her room, he can’t have the courage to knock on the door and tell her that they’re leaving. It’s just a crush. He kept on telling himself. This will pass. With a heavy sigh, he put down the necklace on the floor and went downstairs. 

“Did you wake her up?” Yuta smiled, shaking his head. "That girl, really." The older woman was about to leave when the younger stopped her, saying that it's fine. His mom stared at him in worry.

Yuta went inside the cab while her parents thanked the other couple. This is it, he thought. His goodbye to her. His thumb grazed against her smiling photo as his phone wallpaper. His parents both looked at him when they went inside the car, asking if he's alright and he nodded then closed his phone. 

As the car started moving away from the mansion, his phone lit up with her name. He's a coward. He shouldn't be her bodyguard. He closed the phone, removing his sim card and breaking it in half. 

Yuta's goodbye to her. The love of his life. 

The last few years were so good to Yuta. His uncle sent him to a university in Tokyo where he took a course in business administration and start a small business of his own. He met a lot of good people, nice girls from his line of work but sometimes he would trail to thoughts of her. Her smile, her eyes. 

Whenever winter comes, he would think of her grinning excitedly at the thought of snow. When spring comes, he finds himself smiling at the cherry blossoms. Wanting her to see them with her own two eyes. Whenever summer comes, he wished she’s here with him and eating delicious foods at festivals. When it’s autumn, he would dream of them walking under the shedding trees and holding each other’s hands. Then the cycle repeats itself. 

He missed her more as time pass. 

Can he even see her again? Why can’t he fully say goodbye to his feelings for her? 

“I heard there are pretty girls at the party. We should definitely check it out.” One of his business partners claimed, referring to a party happening to a famous hotel in Tokyo. “Maybe this is your chance to forget about that girl.” 

Maybe it is. He should focus on forgetting about her. Maybe this time, he can finally say goodbye to the thoughts of her. 

Surprisingly the more he stayed at the party, the more he was reminded of her. Is this how it feels like being the ‘Barbie doll’? Just standing, smiling, and greeting people when you want to go home and just rest. Seeing how some creepy rich old men were walking to where younger girls are, he thought that these chaebol’s daughters should really have a bodyguard of their own. How is she? Did she find another bodyguard?   

Yuta excused himself outside to get some breath of fresh air. This is dangerous, he kept on thinking about her. He’s failing his mission. “Y/N!” someone called that made him turn to the owner of the voice. A guy in simple shirt and jeans, very different from the semi-formal attire in the party, was looking around the garden. “Y/N, your mom is going to kill me.” 

He really said her name, didn’t he? Before he can walk to where he is, he heard a small sound behind the bushes then some movement. Curious, he peeked behind only to get punched in the face. Hard. “Oh shit, I’m sorry.” Is he hurt that much? Why is he seeing her? “Yuta?” 

“Y/N!” the sound got closer that made her pull him to hide behind the bushes. 

“What are you…?” She put a hand over her mouth to cover his voice. Their distance so close that he can feel her warmth and the fruity smell that he always associated with her. A loud heartbeat ringing in his ears but now, he’s sure that it was his. 

When the guy went inside the party, Y/N breathed hard in relief. Her head lay on Yuta’s shoulder, catching her breath. “That was so close.” 

He lightly pushed her, moving to the side to create a distance from the two of them. “What were you doing?” 

“Hiding.” she said with a grin. “He’s going to return me to mom and introduce me to some Japanese hotshot." he rolled her eyes while fixing her skirt. "I don't even know how to speak Japanese, I just passed class because…" She lightly glanced at him, her eyes widening in surprise. "Your lip is bleeding." 

Yuta touched his bottom lip, a bright red tint appearing on his thumb. "Maybe because of your punch." She repeatedly apologized, handing him her handkerchief. "Have you been practicing your punches?" 

"I'm training to be a boxer to join the Olympics." 

"Seriously?"  

The girl squinted her eyes at him. "I'm stuck with that lanky guy who can't even land a punch. How am I supposed to protect myself?" 

Yuta laughed then pulled her down in an attempt to hide her from the guy looking for her. "Why are you stuck with that guy anyways? Your dad knew better." 

"Well, my bodyguard left me without even saying goodbye when he promised me..." 

"I'm sorry." Yuta whispered. "Saying goodbye is harder than staying with you." He breathed heavily. "I'm falling deeper for the girl I'm supposed to protect. I'm scared I might hurt you." He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. 

She rolled her eyes at that. "Why didn't you tell me?" 

"Because I'm a nobody and you're way out of my league, Y/N." 

"You're stupid, Yuta. I didn't even sleep that night and waited for you to knock on the door that morning." She lightly punched his shoulder, earning a yelp from him. Tears were streaming from her eyes that startled him. "I even went to Osaka to look for you." 

He held her cheeks, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. “I’m sorry, Y/N.” He mumbled. “I can’t get you out of my mind as well.” He held her in his arms, her necklace hanging loosely from her neck. He traced the heart pendant, smiling at her. “It looks good on you.” 

She punched his shoulder another time, surprising Yuta. “Don’t hide from me again. I’ll kill you, Yuta.” 

The guy rubbed the spot she just punched, “I don’t think I can be your bodyguard anymore. Let me just guard your heart instead.” Another punch and he just chuckled, pulling her in his arms again.

Yuta smiled. Mission failed. 

He really can’t say goodbye to the love of his life. 

[cordonian-literature]

The Aftermath - Ch. 4

Emotions and Confrontations

Summary: Eleanor has a difficult week with her mother in the hospital, and Bastien asks Riley’s mother for some information

A/N: this one’s a bit of a long one

Word Count: ~5.0k

Warning: Mention of character death

*All characters belong to Pixelberry, except those that are unique to my story (I’ve also used some characters and fictional instances from Donna Tartt’s “The Goldfinch”)*

Catch up here!

Tags: @captain-kingliamsqueen​​ @marshmallowsaremyfavorite​​ @gkittylove99​​ @lovablegranny​​ @loudbluebirdlover​​ @mom2000aggie​​ @kingliam2019​​ @queenrileyrose​​ @shanzay44​​ @cordonianroyalty​​ @hopefulmoonobject​​ @hopelessromanticmonie​​ @cinnamonspongecake​​ @queenjilian​​ @kuladekiwi​​ @twinkle-320​​ @iaminlovewithtrr​​

- Eleanor -

Grandma had work on Sunday, which was the same day that the city was re-opened, so we went to the hospital before we went home. She put us in the care of a friendly nurse, Cheryl, who told us we had to sit in the ICU waiting room until Mama came back from her surgery. I was scared that she was gonna look different when she came out, like an ugly Frankenstein or Coraline’s Other Mother, but when her bed was wheeled back into the ICU, she only had a bandage wrapped around her head, covering her hairline. Besides the bandages and a bruise on her cheek, she was still my Mama.

Grandma had left us some cash in case we got hungry and wanted a snack or something from the cafeteria. I didn’t have an appetite, but I constantly asked Gabe to bring me to the vending machine (it was a little far from the ICU, and Grandma didn’t want us going by ourselves, so I had to go with him) and I would purposefully drag behind and take forever to choose something.

I could tell it annoyed him, but that wasn’t really what I was doing. I just hated being in the ICU. It wasn’t boring — we had our phones to play games on, there was a TV which the other people waiting let us have the remote for, and the nurses and doctors who passed by us would always try to start a conversation or give us sad smiles, which made me feel bad because I didn’t have the energy to smile back — it was just that sometimes the ICU felt a little scary. Looking at some of the other patients who were sick made me afraid that this was just a place they were storing Mama before she was going to go join Daddy. I didn’t want to be reminded to think about that, so every time I could I would ask Gabe to bring me to get a snack. I never ate them, and he would only take a bite before leaving it, so very soon the tables next to Mama’s bed were filled with junk food.

Grandma was upset about that. She said that if we didn’t like something we shouldn’t have gotten it. Thankfully, Gabe didn’t rat me out and say that I had made him bring me twelve times, so Grandma thought we just got twelve things at once. She talked to us about it in a gentle voice, but I still started crying and said that I hated it here. I had an audience, which made me nervous, so I hid my face in Grandma’s stomach. We said goodbye to Mama, even though she was still asleep, and went home.

When we got to our door, there was a man and a woman wearing dark suits waiting for us. Grandma told us to go to our rooms while she talked to them, and afterwards called us into the kitchen for dinner, where she told us that they wanted to remind us we would have to stay with her until Mama got better, and that Daddy's funeral was on Friday.

Grandma called our principal and told her that we weren’t going to be going to school for the rest of the week. I wasn’t upset about school, but what I didn’t like was that I would also have to miss my ballet classes and I wouldn’t be able to take piano lessons for the rest of the week, either.

I cried about it. I wanted to go. I wanted something to happen that was normal, something that I used to do before all of this. At least when I was dancing I would be able to pretend like Mama and Daddy were gonna pick me up together from the lobby. At least when I was in front of the piano with my teacher, Molly, next to me, I could pretend that Mama and Daddy were sitting somewhere behind me listening to me play.

On Monday, Mama was still unconscious, but the doctor said she was doing much better. Grandma’s shift was shorter that day, so she told us we would be visiting Daddy’s work to make sure everything was alright.

We walked into the office building through the revolving door. Gabe and I got into one section while Grandma was in the one behind us. When it was time for us to jump off, Gabe wouldn’t let me pass and began running to make the doors turn faster. It made me a little dizzy, but when Grandma told us to come out, Gabe and I tumbled out together and laughed. I realized it had been a while since I had seen him smile, and that made me sad again.

The receptionist says hello to Grandma and one of Daddy’s workers brought us towards the elevator and up to his office.

As soon as we step out of the elevator, I can see the inside of Daddy’s office through the room’s glass walls.

We pass through cubicles before reaching Daddy’s assistant’s desk, who looks at us with a smile.

“Mrs. Brooks! It’s nice to see you,” she says to Grandma. She looks down at Gabe and I and goes, “Hey there, kids! How are you two holding up?”

“We’re fine,” Gabe says and I manage a small smile.

“I would like a word with you, Ashley,” Grandma demands.

“Oh,” she exclaims. Though Ashley’s skin is dark, a deep pink appears on her cheeks, which I didn’t expect, and she begins to look around her desk nervously. “Yes, of course. Give me a moment.”

After she collects a few documents and folders, Ashley looks at my brother and I to say, “A co-worker’s birthday was today. There’s cake, donuts, and some juice over there. Why don’t you guys take a look?”

We nod our heads and walk off in the direction that Ashley pointed towards while her and Grandma walk into Daddy’s office.

In the room, people are talking to each other and they don’t notice us when we each grab a donut. Gabe pours himself some juice and asks me if I want any.

“Could you also give me a slice of cake, please?” I request.

“The knife for the cake is already there,” he tells me.

“Mama told me no knives. Remember what happened last Thanksgiving?” I laugh to myself.

“I wish I could forget what happened last Thanksgiving, but this knife is different, Ella, it’s more blunt. Just cut how big you want your slice and pull it out.”

He puts my apple juice on my plate, goes to grab his own plate and walk off, but I whine, “Pleaseeee?”

“Ella, I swear. Look, the pieces are already cut up! You can just grab it with your hands!”

“But....” I give a sad pout.

“Oh, God,” Gabe sighs and uses his fingers to grab a piece and put it on my plate. I look at it distastefully.

There’s frosting on his fingers. He licks it off, thinks for a second, and then grabs another piece to put on his own plate. Grabbing two forks he leads me to a couple chairs against the wall.

We sit down and eat. I finish my cake and my donut, and then ask Gabe to get us seconds while I get more apple juice. The table with all the food on it is near the door, and while I pour my drink I can see Grandma talking to Ashley. Ashley pulls out some papers from the pile she brought in and hands them to Grandma. She then goes into Daddy’s desk and pulls out some more papers. Grandma examines everything with a frown. She turns back towards Ashely and nods. She walks towards the door, but at the last second says something else to Ashley, who looks down at her feet. She replies, and Grandma seems disappointed.

“I wonder what they’re talking about,” I say.

“Grandma looks mad,” Gabe notices. “Do you know why?”

I shrug and go back to our seats.

Once Grandma finishes talking to Ashley, she comes over to us and tells us to eat quickly. Every worker in the room turns to give her a “Good afternoon, Mrs. Brooks,” or a polite nod.

On Tuesday, Grandma calls Molly, my piano teacher, and asks her to come in to give me a lesson. The night before I cried to my grandmother about how I wanted something to go back to normal, so I guess this was her way of giving me that.

When Molly came in, she gave me a long hug, then hugged Grandma and Gabe, too. After she had a short conversation with Grandma, she sat down in a chair next to my stool. Looking through my folder of music sheets, she couldn't decide what to give me.

“I know,” she says at last. “Why don’t you play your dad’s favorite piece? Remember how proud of you he was when you mastered it?”

I nod my head, but there are tears threatening to fall. I had never cried in front of Molly before. I didn’t want her to think that I was a baby who couldn’t get over anything. I wanted her to think that I was the girl who wanted to make her father proud, so I was determined to play it.

My fingers are stiff when I hit the first note. Molly doesn’t say anything. When I bring my right hand to play along, my fingers don’t flow — they just jab at the keys. I can tell my wrists are too stiff. Molly still doesn’t correct me.

Daddy wouldn’t have liked that. He would have wanted you to play better. And you can play better. So why aren’t you? Why can’t you do it for Daddy? Do you want him to be disappointed in you?

I stop playing and my hands hover over the keys. They’re cold and shaking.

“Ella?” Molly tries to get my attention.

My shoulders drop, and my arms fall to my sides. I shake my head, staring down at the keys, at the instrument I loved so much. I don’t cry, but Molly still brings me in for a hug.

Grandma has work again on Wednesday, but I wasn’t looking forward to going back to the ICU. I asked her if I could go with her to the part of the hospital that she was working at and be away from the ICU for a little bit, but Grandma convinces me: “When Mama wakes up, don’t you want to see her right away, instead of later, after Gabriel gets a chance to come and get you?”

Thankfully we didn’t have to go into the waiting room, but whenever a doctor or Cheryl wanted to check in on Mama, they’d ask us to stand on the other side of the curtain for a few moments.

Gabe and I don’t cry as much as we had been the past couple days, and I was proud of us for it. A while after we had been sitting there, Gabe gets out of his seat and sits on the edge of Mama’s bed, putting his head on her stomach. He doesn’t cry — just looks at her. I go to the other side of her bed and hold the palm of her hand. I begin to tell her about how the first half of this week has gone, and how much I miss talking to her and hearing her laugh at the jokes Gabe always said weren’t funny.

He sits up and laces his hand through her fingers. We both sit silently.

I turn my head around in surprise at the sound of the curtain moving. Mama’s doctor holds the curtain open for a tall man who stares at us. His blond hair was messy, like how Gabe’s got sometimes when he’d forget to brush it. He stands there and looks between Mama and us. The doctor motions for him to take a seat, and he walks towards it, but doesn’t sit down.

He’s too quiet. It made me nervous. The area under his eyes were dark, and I knew he hadn’t slept for at least two days. Daddy’s eyes did that sometimes, too.

I didn’t like him staring at us. I wanted to ask him what he was there for, but I try to be nice and say, “Hi. I’m Ella. This is Gabe. Are you here to see our mom?”

Finally he starts moving towards me, but his eyes were locked on Mama, so I move away and stand near Gabe.

He holds her hand. I hear him start crying. He kisses Mama’s knuckles in between his cries.

I’m almost mad. No one kissed Mama except for Daddy. And who was this man anyway? But seeing a grown man cry, waterfalls falling out of his eyes and his face scrunched, I start crying, too.

Gabe tries to comfort me, but my head jolts up when I hear the sheets moving. Mama shook her head around and finally looked at the man. She pulls her hand back and I think, “Ha!”.

He stands up straight and looks a little intimidating. “Hello, Riley,” he says.

Mama frowns at him. She then looks at us, her eyes wide. I want to jump and give her all the hugs and kisses in the world, but she looks so shocked I’m almost scared to move.

“Do I...,” she takes another look around the room. “Do I know you people?”

We all stare at Mama in shock. My heart thunders in my chest.

“Riley...,” the man starts. “It’s me... Liam.”

“Who? I don’t... I don’t know you....”

“Mom, what do you mean?” Gabe asks, he reaches for her hand, but she pulls it back. Gabe’s face falls, defeated.

The curtain moves again, and Grandma walks in. Immediately, I rush to her and cry, “Mama doesn’t remember us, Grandma, Mama doesn’t know us!”

Cheryl was right behind her, and once she hears me, she turns back and calls the doctor in. Grandma pulls me out, calling for Gabe, and the doctor asks the man to step out as well.

We stand at a distance from the curtain for a few moments. I can hear the doctor talking inside, but I don’t know what she’s saying. The man who said he was Liam turns to Grandma and asks in a small voice, “Has her condition improved since the incident?”

“Not significantly,” Grandma responds. “She’s been unconscious ever since the surgery on Sunday. This is the first time she’s woken up.”

Another man, this one with dark hair, walks up to us and goes, “Surgery?”

Grandma looks at him. “Yes. She suffered a head injury.”

“Are you the nurse assigned to her?” Liam questions.

“No,” she answers. “I am her mother.”

“Ah,” Liam holds out his hand. “Liam Rys. A pleasure to meet you.”

Grandma shakes his hand, not breaking eye contact. Liam regards Gabe and I.

“These two are...?”

“My grandchildren. Riley’s children. Eleanor and Gabriel.”

Both men stare at Grandma, their mouths slightly agape. “I see.” Liam clears his throat. He looks down at us and forces a smile. “It’s nice to meet you two.”

The doctor finally comes out from the curtain and says something to a couple of nurses. She then comes to us and says, “We’re going to take her in for another CT scan. See if there’s anything we didn’t notice before.”

“Of course,” Liam goes.

The doctor motions the two men towards the waiting room, and then comes back to us.

“Will you let me know what happens?” Grandma asks. “I have to take these two home.”

“Of course,” the doctor promises.

We leave the hospital, not saying anything to one another.

Once we’re in the elevator of our building, Gabe turns to Grandma and questions her, “Grandma did you know who those men were?”

“I knew the blond one. Liam,” she answers, continuing to stare at the elevator doors. “I could guess who the second one was. Your Mama told me about them some time ago.”

“Why are they here? I’ve never seen them before.”

“Because now they know where your Mama is.”

“They didn’t know before?” I ask.

“No,” Grandma says curtly.

“Why?” Gabe continues. I almost tell him to stop. Grandma looks annoyed, but I want to know why, too.

“Because they didn’t know Mama’s last name was Blaise.”

Gabe scoffs. “What did they think it was?”

“Brooks.” She still doesn’t look at us. My anxiety increases, and I want to almost yell at her to just be direct with us.

“Why did they think she had your last name?” I question.

“Because that’s what Mama’s last name was before she got married.”

“So they didn’t know where she was because...,” Gabe starts, but he doesn’t know what to say next.

“Because her name changed?” I continue for him.

“Yes. And no one knew what your Mama looked like. Your Daddy told people he was married. People only knew his wife’s name, not her face. Now people know her face, so they used her old name.”

“Did Daddy do that on purpose?” I wonder aloud.

“Yes,” Grandma says.

Gabe looks at me, frowning. He’s confused, just as I am. I can see he still wants to ask questions. I want to ask some, too, but the fact that Grandma hadn't looked at us when she spoke made me think she was mad. I didn’t want her to get angrier.

For dinner we have some leftover pasta from the night before. We eat in silence, scared that we would agitate Grandma. But once she finishes her plate, she looks up at us. “I don’t want you both talking to those men, okay?”

“Yes, Grandma,” we say, but I want to ask more questions. I decide against it, and go to sleep confused.

The next day, they finally move Mama into a regular hospital room. There are two more men who came to see Mama. Today was the day that they were going to ask her questions. First the doctors and Grandma asked questions, and they found out that she knew her own name and she knew who Grandma was. Mama also knew the names of every school she had gone to.

Next, they asked us if we wanted to go ask questions. We walked in, but once we looked at Mama, and Mama’s empty, emotionless face looked back at us, Gabe and I couldn’t say anything, so we shook our heads.

They let us sit in the little room with her. Cheryl stayed, too, in the corner of the room. Liam was the next person. He stood at a distance from her this time. He looked like he had done enough crying for everyone in the room. He gently asked her about a bar who’s name I had never heard of, then about the Statue of Liberty, then about some place called Corndania, I think it was. I thought it was the name of a town, and wanted to tell him that she had never been there. Then he asked if she remembered anything about a social season or a tour. I could tell that he had to stop himself from asking her more questions. With every sentence, Mama looked more distressed, and the same distress was mirrored on Liam's face. She looked like she was going to cry, and I thought it was interesting that she didn’t.

Then the other man that was here yesterday walked in after Liam left.

“Do you recognize me?” he asked.

“No,” she stated.

“Name’s Drake.” He lifted his eyebrows.

She nods.

For a couple moments, they just stare at each other. Mama looks like she’s trying to memorize his face. 

He doesn't look like he has much to say. Drake catches his breath and starts again: “Do... do you remember what I said to you, at Applewood Manor, or what happened when the court was there?”

“...Where?”

“You don’t... remember anything about Applewood?”

“No. At least, I don’t think so....”

“Well... then do you remember when you helped me pick an engagement gift for Liam?”

“For who?”

He paused. “Liam.... The guy that was just in here.”

“Oh. No, I don’t. Did you end up with a nice gift?”

“I did, thanks to you.”

“That’s nice.”

“Yeah...,” Drake trails off. He sniffles and wipes at his eyes. “Well, I don’t have anything else to ask you, really. There are two guys who are gonna come in next, Maxwell and Bertrand. After that some detectives are gonna ask some questions.”

“Okay.”

He opens his mouth to say something more, but decides against it and walks out.

While we wait for Maxwell and Bertrand, Gabe asks her a question: “Do you remember us? Or know who we are?”

She examines us for a second. “No.”

“What about our dad? Do you remember him?” Gabe continues.

“What’s your dad’s name?” she asks.

“Theodore. Theodore Blaise.”

“Oh, yeah. I've known him since we were both kids. I think we went to high school together? Maybe it was elementary. It might have been both.”

Gabe and I look at each other. Mama and Daddy had never told us how long they had known one another, so we didn’t know how to react.

Two men walk in, and I assume that they’re Maxwell and Bertrand. The one in the vest notices us, and gapes. “Who are you? What are you doing in here?” The second man turns to look as well.

“We’re Ella and Gabe. That’s our Mama.” I point at my mother.

The men look at each other for so long I imagine they’ve turned into statues. “Baby blossoms?” one of them breathes. The other one scoffs at him.

“Aren’t you here to ask her some questions?” Cheryl asks. I almost forgot she was in the room.

The man in the vest clears his throat. “Yes.”

They walk up to the foot of the bed. The second man goes, “Do you remember us, little blossom?”

Mama shakes her head.

“Duke Bertrand Beaumont of Ramsford,” says the one with the vest. “Does that ring a bell?”

“No,” she answers.

“I’m Maxwell,” the second one continues. “Do you remember our Beaumont Bash? Or our investigation on the Engagement Tour?”

“I... don’t know what that is...,” she states.

The men look at each other hopelessly.

We see people in suits at the door to her room. They knock and come in, and ask the two men to step out. “You too, kiddos,” one of them commands, almost as an afterthought.

Gabe and I follow behind Maxwell and Bertrand. Near the door, Liam and Drake are waiting for them. I look around for Grandma.

“Any luck?” Drake asks.

The two men shake their heads.

“What about you two?” Liam asks us in a gentle voice. We look at each other, wondering if Grandma would be mad if we answered a simple question. “Did you get to ask her anything?”

“We asked her if she knew us,” Gabe starts, turning back towards the man, “but she said no. She remembers our dad, though, but from when she was a kid.”

“Ah,” Liam breathes. “Were you both at the museum when... everything happened?”

I don’t really like him, so I stay quiet. Gabe answers, simply saying, “No.”

“You two didn’t have school today?” Maxwell asks.

“Grandma got us time off.”

“That must be nice.”

Gabe shrugs. “I guess.”

After a few moments, the third man, whose name I assume is Bertrand, asks us, “How old are you two?”

“I just turned ten. Ella’s seven.”

He makes a “humph?” sound, as if he’s confused, and frowns. Grandma calls to us from the other side of the room, talking to another nurse. We wave goodbye.

“Will you both be coming back tomorrow?” Liam asks.

“No. Tomorrow’s our dad’s funeral,” Gabe answers. I grab his arm and try to pull him away. I don’t want Grandma to see us talking to them.

“Maybe we’ll see you guys on Saturday?” Maxwell inquires cheerfully.

“Maybe. I don’t know.” We wave again and walk next to Grandma. Once she sees that we’re at her side, she grabs our hands and leads us out. I wonder if she’s going to reprimand us for talking to those men, but for the rest of the night she talks to us about something that one of her patients did, and doesn’t mention any of the four men or Mama.

- Bastien -

After paying the taxi cab driver, Bastien stands to regard the modern building in front of him. The doorman eyes him, smiling. Bastien gives him a curt nod and the man holds the door open for him. There’s another staff member in similar uniform at the reception desk. “Excuse me, sir?” he calls out to Bastien. “Can I help you?”

“No, thank you,” Bastien doesn’t look at him. “I know where I’m going.”

Theodore Blaise’s funeral should have ended more than five hours ago. He knew that Riley’s children and her mother would be back in their penthouse by now.

He walks into the elevator and presses the number he memorized.

A woman walks in and reaches over Bastien to click her button. When they reach his floor, she watches him silently step out and walk down the short hall way.

Once Bastien gets to the end of said hallway, he knocks on the last door.

When the door doesn’t open, he knocks again.

Eleanor is the one to open it. Her short, curly hair is pulled back into a tight ponytail. She wears a white leotard and pointe shoes. Sweat drips from the corner of her brow, but her breathing is even.

“Hi,” she says.

“Hello,” Bastien looks behind her. “Is your grandmother nearby?”

“Yes.”

“Could you go get her, please?”

“Okay.” She closes the door.

A few moments pass, in which Bastien thinks that the girl left him just to pull on his strings. But the door opens again, this time by Charlotte Brooks.

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Brooks. May I come in?”

The woman stares at Bastien for a moment. He can tell she’s contemplating whether to close the door in his face or not.

“Yes,” she allows, stepping aside.

Bastien takes a step in and regards the entryway. To his right he can see a doorway to a kitchen, and to his left are stairs going down.

Mrs. Brooks walks straight ahead, leading him into the living room with wall-length mirrors. Before she reaches the couches, she turns around. “Would you like to sit down?” she asks.

“No, thank you, ma’am.”

“Tea? Coffee?”

“I’m alright.”

“Then what are you here for? To spy on me again?”

“Sorry?” He frowns.

“Don’t you remember? A couple years ago you sent out a team to spy on my house. I saw you come and leave sometimes. It was around when my daughter left your king.”

Bastien holds up a hand. “I apologize for that, but I am here for something else.”

“What more do you want from my family?”

Bastien sighs. “Do you remember seeing Duke Bertrand yesterday? Him and his brother were there to see Lady Riley.”

“Yes, I remember. The one with the sweater vest.”

“Precisely. Your grandchildren spoke to him momentarily yesterday.”

Mrs. Brooks takes a deep breath. “And?”

“This morning the Duke alerted me that he believes Gabriel Blaise is His Majesty’s and Lady Riley’s son.”

She crosses her arms in front of her chest. “Do you have proof?”

“No,” he begins, “which is why I am here. If you have followed Cordonian news after His Majesty broke off his engagement with Countess Madeleine, you’ll know that he has had a lot of pressure to produce an heir to the throne.”

“So?”

“Some of his advisors and his step-mother have tried to convince him for years to marry or to begin attempts for a child who could later rule Cordonia. He continuously refuses, and his close friends know that he hasn't gotten over Lady Riley. Since there has been no chance of them marrying or His Majesty having children, other countries have been quite... unfriendly, you could say, and some have even tried to begin hostile occupations in Cordonia, in an attempt to attack our king and our already weakened monarchy. If Gabriel is his heir, Cordonia would have stability, which is what the country and its people desperately need.”

“Did Liam tell you to come here?”

“No, ma’am. His friends simply helped me piece together the puzzle.”

“Does your king even know you’re here?”

Bastien sighs. “No, ma’am. I wished to speak to you first. I still believe His Majesty is oblivious to the fact that he may be a father, and wanted to make sure that you would be alright with us taking a DNA sample of your grandson.”

“So you asked me before talking to him about it because you wanted to finish the difficult task first?”

“...Yes.”

“Do you really think I would subject my family to the same type of pain that your king made my daughter suffer through? Do you really think I’m going to let my daughter, who was shamed by a foreign country, have her child be put to the same, if not similar, subjection?” Her voice breaks.

“I understand, ma’am—.”

“Do you now?” she interrupts, laughing.

“I am not asking you to do this for Cordonia. I am asking you to do this for a man. Wouldn’t you agree that every father has the right to meet his son?”

Mrs. Brooks takes a moment to absorb Bastien’s words. He can hear music playing from another room.

In a soft voice, quieter than a gentle summer breeze, Mrs. Brooks agrees, saying, “Alright. I’ll be bringing him and his sister to the hospital tomorrow. Tell the king before then.” At the last second she adds, “I’ll bring his birth certificate as well. Hopefully it'll all be enough to prove paternity.”

[kraysenford]

——  [ kraysen ford, cis male, thirty seven. ] hailing from prada verde, this farmer was at his wedding when the sudden departure happened and lost his fiance, sister, mother, father & best friend. People tend to associate him with an Old Farm House, Old Worn Down Books & Blind Willie Johnson Records. He is at risk of being followed by the guilty remnant and will recite different paragraphs of scripture and or monolouges when they encounter them.

Penned by Angie.

BIOGRAPHY

TRIGGERS: Death, Cheating & Single Parenting

May my mercy prevail over my wrath.

Men with good hearts were always hard to come by in this day and age, those who portrayed themselves to be usually just hid their agenda’s better than others. But there was no man like Kraysen Ford, the boy next door, the man with intergrity and respect.

Brought up on a farm in Prada Verde; he was a country boy through and through. Growing up in the house with his Mother, Father, Younger Sister, Older brother and Grandma; a close family who were always found laughing around the dinner table at night, cards lay out and jokes being told. They were a genorous bunch, always thinking of others; whether his mother was running a charity food drive for those less fortunate in the community or his father was out helping his older neighbours with the chores they’d grown too weary to do in their old age.

Kraysen spent his years growing up seeing all these acts of kindess, in and outside of the home. The way his grandmother talked about the long marriage she had to his grandfather before he passed, when they decided she should live with them so she wasn’t alone. The way his mother and father were together, so effortless, yet still so compassionate and tender all these years on. Each and every moment, Kray took from it, he learnt how to be a real man. Not the kind of man that women loved in the movies, a bad boy. Sure, he had his traits — but he was far from it.

In High school he met his best friend, the person who he knew got him. Although he was kind and sweeter than the usual popular lads in high school, Kraysen made his way to the top by being one of the most liked people due to his nature. He was a favorite of not only the students, but the teachers and was academic, although not that interested in it. His favorite class was music, always taking the time to sing, play the piano or guitar which he showed a natural ability with.

But knew he’d never be able to persue it, his job was to take over the farm from his dad. And while some people would say that it was unfair to put that burden on a child, Kraysen knew it was not only the right thing to do but also the smart thing. It was a steady job, music never would be and Kray saw a wife and children in his future; he saw them on that very farm where he’d grown up, playing in the fields while Harp and his wife would sip cold punch in the summer time.

Throughout school Kraysen dated an array of girls, he wasn’t a heartbreaker, in fact, they ended up breaking his. Whether it was cheating, saying he was too nice or it just wasn’t the right time — he found himself always wondering if there was something wrong with him, or maybe it was only the bad guys that ended up with the girls in the end.

It was only in his last year of high school, as a Senior, that he began to sneak out to parties; he was sure if he asked his parents they’d be fine with it, but it was more fun that way. His Grandma caught him a few times, saying it was their secret — their bond only grew. But those nights he realised that he struggled to find the one, no one ever stood out to him anymore, he was a man that still appreciated the woman’s form, and the woman he wanted he couldn’t have. That was his problem, and he knew it all too well.

After high school he began working at the farm immediately, as a graduation gift he was given a red truck; like the one he’d always dreamed of, which Kraysen and his father worked every day to restore; it was their thing, something he cherished. But he knew he wanted to do something more, he wanted to be more — Help people, but just in a different way to his parents.

With the grades and the right attitude, Kraysen attended Savannah State University where he studied Psychology, so he could become a therapy and eventually, after completing all the courses — he graduated and after speaking with his father, they set up Ranch Therpay; Kray was aware that most people found it daunting to go into someones office and talk to them, so he decided to use the farm as a tool. Each patient would walk with him through the farm, ride the horses, feed the animals and that’s when therapy would commence. He believed it was better to get a lot of his patients out of a room and into the open, a lot of people didn’t get to do that. Depression kept them couped up, or they were too afraid to go out alone, only two reasons among thousands.

And it worked, a sucess that was reported on the news, the papers all around Prada Verde. They were known as the family of givers, those who were happy to help others and wanted to keep helping as much as they could.

He his older brother, Bash, also named Bazen. But he was older, married and had a family of his own.  He’d decided the family business wasn’t for him at a young age and ventured into property sales, he was amazing at it and was grateful for what he had. They saw each other most Sundays at church or when they had family meals, in honour of their family traditions. But the questions were always asked as to when Harp would settle down; when he’d finally meet the girl of his dreams.

So he started actively looking until he met her, like a whirl wind she came into his life and ripped him apart like a tornado set on a path of destruction. She was everything he never usually went for, a seductive, maipulative and soul sucking creature who he’d end up falling in love with. 

And then she was pregnant.

While Kray was happy, he could tell she wasn’t. It was like being punched in the stomach, each day became painstakingly long as he wished for their child to arrive, in hopes it may fix the clear void that had become present, but instead she flew deeper into a void of anger and annoyance. And the day their beautiful daughter, Dotty Andrews arrived, she was gone. Left without another word, and from that day on he vowed he’d do anything and everything for his daughter.

However, he did what he had to, to win her back. But it was short lived, the day they were marrying on his farm, they all just dissapeared.

Like a light went out. And then there was no one.

Just Kray and his daughter, his entire family had almost been wiped out, and left a man completely torn apart. What would he do? Where would he go? How would he live? A man who was amazing dad, but had always had the love of his parents to help him when needed. But that had been ripped away from him, and he had no answers as to why. 

Now he’s a solitary man, who lives on his farm, still loving and happy, but keeps himself distances as to not get hurt again. He just prays nothing comes to take his daughter away, for that would be the worst thing that could ever happen to him.

PERSONALITY

POSITIVE: Disciplined, Kind hearted, Reliable & Romantic. NEGATIVE: Jealous, Over Sensitive, Stubborn & Over Thinker.

[booksalwaysandforever]

Holding on to the Memories Chapter 3

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Summary: Lauren’s life was a perfect dream, until one day it wasn’t. Cutting can distract you from life, but it can also take life away. Can Lauren get back home, or has it all been taken away from her?

Tag list:  @kai-unknown​

Length: almost 3000 words, it’s pretty long!

I’m so sorry, it has been forever since I posted. This chapter took a long time to write and I have had a rough couple weeks. I absolutely love this chapter and I hope you do too! I will try and get the next chapter out a lot faster than this one.

The darkness was all consuming. There was no way out, and no way to tell how long I had been here. It could’ve been 5 minutes or a month. I didn’t know. 

All of a sudden, the darkness lit up with millions of colors. At first, I thought the light was back, but as I watched the scene in front of me unfold, I quickly realized that wasn’t it at all. 

“Please, take care of her,” a woman, my birth mother, said as she handed a baby to Carlisle. 

“We will take care of her and give her a life as grand as if she were a princess.” She smiled at the answer and closed her eyes as her breathing stopped. Carlisle turned to the baby in his arms. “Welcome to the family, Lauren. I promise to love you as if you were my own daughter, as I’m sure Esme and the rest of your siblings will as well.” With that, he turned and rushed away.

This was a memory. It was mine, but at the same time, it wasn’t. I was too young to remember this. It must’ve been Carlisle’s. It was the day he found and adopted me. Carlisle had been hunting nearby and could smell the blood. He came as fast as he could to see what had happened and if he could help. Sadly, my dad was killed on impact and my mother was severely hurt. Carlisle couldn’t save her, but before she died, she gave me to Carlisle, in hopes that he could give me an amazing life. 

The memory quickly faded into another one.

“Everyone, I have some news,” Carlisle said as he walked through the door. “Meet your new little sister. Her parents were in a car crash and she has no other family, so she’ll be staying with us.”

Everyone piled around, getting a good look at their sister.

“Nessie,” Edward said, “she looks a little like you. And a lot like you did when you were human, Bella.”

“Yeah, brown hair, brown eyes, so similar.” Renesmee said, rolling her eyes as she moved closer to me. “Hi there girly. I’m Nessie, your big sister.” The little baby giggled and stretched their hands out to grab at Renesmee’s hand. When she got a hold of it, she pulled the fingers into her mouth and began sucking on them.

“I think she’s going to start using us all as teething rings,” Esme laughed as she reached her hands out to Carlisle. “Come here girly, Mommy wants to meet you.”

The moment Esme got her hands on the little girl, she began swaying side to side and humming to her. The baby was asleep within a minute.

“What’s her name, Carlisle?” Rosalie asked.

“Lauren Lee Stoel. She is about 4 months old I do believe. I have yet to see her official birth certificate, but I’m sure I will soon. The adoption process starts on Monday.”

“Wait, we’re actually adopting her?” Esme asked with a huge grin on her face.

“Yes dear. In a matter of months, she will officially be ours. She will officially be a Cullen.”

The scene faded again as another one began appearing. Renesmee was showing me as many memories as she could find, memories from my life, taken from the rest of my family, trying to help me wake up.

Esme opened the door to a room and walked in. I followed her in, but it was so dark, I couldn’t see anything. As my eyes adjusted, I realized it was the nursery. A baby, little me, was lying in a crib with Jasper sitting in the rocking chair nearby, reading a book.

“Jasper, what are you doing?” Esme quietly asked.

“I’m tryin’ to get used to her scent and calm ‘er down. She was fidgeting and having a nightmare, I think. I was gonna try and calm her down.”

Ever since that day, Jasper had been my best friend. Slowly, he had gotten used to me and every time I hurt myself or couldn’t sleep, he calmed me down.

The next memories were like pictures. There wasn’t much for talking, but there were short snippets of my life as a baby, captured like a picture.

Jasper was holding me and singing me to sleep while rocking in the rocking chair.

Rosalie was feeding me some mashed peas, which I had effectively flung back into her face. Everyone, including Rosalie, laughed.

Edward sat me in his lap, and was playing the piano. After a moment, I recognized the tune as my lullaby. I was banging on the piano as hard as I could, making it impossible for him to play.

Alice had dressed me up like a princess, practically in a ballgown. Baby me did not like that. I was screaming my lungs out and trying to pull it off. 

Emmett was lying on the ground beside me, playing with me. After a few moments, I yawned and fell asleep. Emmett appeared not to notice and continued playing with my fascinating baby toys.

As I watched these pictures, I realized that Renesmee wasn’t in all of them. She must have talked to everyone, asking them to tell her about some memories they had of me, and she painted the picture in my head. It was almost like I was there with them, watching myself grow up.

“Oh Lauren! Look at you! You’re so grown up,” Rosalie cooed. Emmett was holding onto my hands, helping my almost one year old self walk across the living room floor. “Come here, come to Rosy”

I let go of Emmett’s hands and walked the small three steps into Rosalie’s arms.

“Oh! Lauren, you did it!” she gasped.

“Yeah, you can walk now!” Emmett shouted

And another memory. A birthday no less.

“Happy birfday to me!!” I cried as I shoved my entire face into the birthday cake Alice had made for my first birthday.

“See, this is why we had to strip her before we let her eat it,” Carlisle said. “Lauren, do you like cake?”

“Oooooh, cake. I like cake,”

“Esme, I don’t think a bath is going to clean her. We’re going to need a garden hose.”

“I’ll go get the power washer!”

Everyone laughed. “Emmett, no! You do not get to hose down your sister with the power washer.”

Images of my second, third, and fourth birthday all passed by, along with many different images of me playing games with my family, meeting the wolves and playing with them, and other random memories. None of them were very long, just a moment or two, but that didn’t mean they weren’t important to me.

“Emmett, Jasper, can you guys take Lauren and go shopping for food for her this afternoon? Your father has to work and the rest of us need to go hunting,” Esme asked the boys.

“Sure thing, Mom,” Jasper said as he grabbed the keys. Emmett helped me put my shoes on and buckled me into my booster seat.

“So, what do you want for supper Lauren?” Emmett asked, turning around in his seat to look at me.

“Pancakes. And Mac and Cheese. Oh! And chicken nuggets.” Jasper laughed.

“We’ll see what we can get you squirt.”

When we got to the store, Emmett and Jasper followed me around the store and let me pick out anything I wanted. The best part of being the youngest kid was that all of my older siblings didn’t have the ability to say no to me. After 30 minutes of following me around the store, we walked out with several bags, mostly consisting of sugar, and brought them to the car. 

After spending the afternoon playing games and running around the house with Emmett and Jasper, everyone came home.

“So, how was shopping, boys?” Esme asked.

“Good, we got everything Lauren wanted.”

“Oh no. No no no.” Esme put her head in her hands. “Please tell me you bought more than just donuts, ice cream, and candy bars.”

“Don’t worry, we did. We also got her some fruit snacks, fruit roll ups, juice boxes, popsicles, and chocolate milk,” said Emmett with an innocent grin on his face.

“And some Mac and cheese, chicken nuggets, yogurt, fish sticks, and stuff for pancakes and waffles. Don’t worry, there is some actual food in there,” Jasper said, laughing at Esme’s horrified face. 

“So Lauren, what do you want to be for Halloween?” Jacob asked me.

“That’s a secret. You’ll just have to wait and see.”

Jacob always took Renesmee and I trick or treating. Renesmee was only one year older than my four year old self, so she passed for a young teenager. People still gave her candy when she was with me, so we always went together. Most of the time, it was too sunny out when we started trick or treating so none of the rest of the family could come.

A week later, it was time to go trick or treating. Alice was in my room helping me get ready. 

“Lauren, are you almost ready? We need to go before all the good candy is gone,” Jacob called from down the stairs. 

“I’m coming. I’m coming,” I shouted back. As I walked down the stairs, Jacob started laughing. I was dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood, and Renesmee and I convinced him to be a wolf. Renesmee was dressed as a grandma to follow along with the whole scheme.

“See, we match!”

From that day on, Jacob always called me Little Red. My Halloween costumes had earned me several nicknames. I dressed up as a bear for Emmett one year and he had begun to call me “brown bear”. I became known as “spider monkey” to Edward because I dressed up as a spider monkey one year for him, and the fact that I would always climb on everything when I was little. To Jasper, I was his “mini major”. I had dressed up as a cowgirl once and I often had a bit of a temper and was pretty sassy. The best Halloween costume though, was when I dressed up as a vampire. Alice and Edward helped me get red contacts, fake fangs, a cape, and everything else to help me look like a vampire in movies, even some fake blood and red juice to drink. Everyone loved it. It was by far, the best Halloween costume ever.

“Can I please know what my birthday present is?” I asked. Jasper had blind folded me and had slung me over his shoulder while he carried me somewhere. 

“No. It’s a surprise.”

“Come on, please? Pretty please? I’m seven now. I should get to know.”

“No.”

“Wow, this is one of the first times you’ve said no.” Jasper laughed.

“We’ve all had a hard time saying no to you since you’re so cute.”

“I’m not cute,” I exclaimed as I hit him as hard as I could without hurting myself. “Rosalie says I’m beautiful. Also, your shoulder hurts. It’s too hard. I’m going to break my hand one of these days from smacking you or Emmett.” Jasper laughed at me again.

“Then maybe don’t hit us.”

“But you deserve to be hit.”

“I agree with Lauren.” Rosalie said, standing somewhere beside me. Jasper set me down on the ground. I could tell we were outside due to the sound of the creek and the breeze blowing my hair.

“Okay, are you ready to see your birthday present?”

“Yes. I’ve been waiting a whole year!” Everyone laughed.

“Okay then.”

Rosalie untied the blindfold and everyone at the party began singing happy birthday. My family, the pack, Grandpa Charlie, Grandma Sue, Grandpa Billy, and even my aunts and uncles from Alaska were there. Alice had made this a huge party, with fairy lights hanging from the trees, a huge banner that said “Happy 7th birthday, Lauren” in fancy calligraphy, and a huge birthday cake. But the coolest thing I saw was a swimming pool with a diving board and slide, a trampoline, and a tree house in the climbing tree. 

“A tree house, a pool, and a trampoline?” I exclaimed, jumping up and down. 

“Yes dear,” said Carlisle. “You’ve been begging us to get at least one for a while and you’ve been doing amazing in school, so we decided to let you have all three. 

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” I shouted as I gave him and Esme hugs. I ran over to the trampoline, and Seth, Jacob, Emmett, and Jasper followed me.

“Boys,” Esme called. “That is Lauren’s gift. Let's not break it on the first day.”

A billion more memories went through my head. Memories of riding on Jacob’s back through the forest and going on runs with all of my siblings and the rest of the pack. Memories of playing tons of board games and video games with Emmett and Jasper, learning to play piano with Edward, and learning to dance with all my brothers and Dad. Going shopping with Rosalie, Alice, and Bella, spending the night at Renesmee’s house and her spending the night with me. Having sleepovers at Grandpa Charlie and Grandma Sue’s house, sleepovers with the pack at Sam and Emily’s house, and even sleepovers in Alaska with Aunt Tanya, Aunt Kate, and Uncle Garrett. Making a flower crown for everyone in the Volturi when they came to visit, making Marcus smile for the first time in a very long time, pretending to be a vampire princess when I visited their palace. Singing and dancing for my entire family, playing tag with everyone, only for it to end with someone catching me, throwing me in the air, and tickling me. Memories of things like going tubing, or to an amusement park with Renesmee, Jacob, Seth, and sometimes the rest of the pack. Even just simple things like blasting music in the car on the way to school, or seeing everyone in the front row at one of my dance recitals. Every one of those billion memories reminded me of why I needed to fight to stay. I needed to hold on to these memories and go home. But how?

One last memory plays in my mind. This one definitely wasn’t mine, but it was everyone else's.

My entire family was there, standing in a hospital room, crowded around a bed. My bed. Renesmee was sitting next to me, on my right side near the window, holding her hand to my cheek. Jasper was sitting on my other side holding my hand, while Alice was standing behind him. Esme and Carlisle, Rosalie and Emmett, Edward and Bella, and Jacob were all standing around my bed. Edward spoke first.

“As you’ve realized, Renesmee has been playing as many memories as she could find for you to try and wake you up. So far, it hasn’t helped. I hope this does. We need you to come back, Lauren.”

“Brown bear, come home,” Emmett whispered just loud enough for everyone to hear. “We’ve got to play Cards Against Humanity.”

“Lauren, we found your gifts,” Rosalie said, reaching for the locket around her neck. “I love it. And I promise,” she said, opening the locket to reveal the picture inside. “I didn’t put anything embarrassing in here.” 

Esme’s crying was worse than it had ever been. Her body was shaking with sobs, which was very unusual for a vampire. She was turned into Carlisle’s body, who was holding her, but he looked like he was going to collapse himself.

“Princess, please. We need you,” was all he could choke out in a hoarse whisper. My dad was never like this. He was always cool, calm, collected. Right now, he looked like a mess. I had broken my Dad. And that broke my heart.

“Little Red, the pack needs you too.” Jacob said from behind Renesmee. “They’ve all been a mess. Especially Seth and Leah. They haven’t slept or eaten in days. We need you. Fight. Please, please fight.”

“Lauren, I need my best friend. I need help eating all the candy and ice cream at home, help beating the boys at every video game we own, help pulling all nighters and watching every movie for the six millionth time. I can’t do that without you. I can’t do it without my best friend and sister.”

Both Bella and Alice couldn’t talk, they were sobbing too hard. I left Alice speechless for the first time ever. 

“I love you too.” That was all Jasper could say. I had never seen him cry. Jasper did not cry. Not once. But now, he was. My big brother, the Major, the strongest of us all, was crying, no, sobbing. And it was all my fault. Slowly, Jasper leaned forward and kissed my forehead.

That kiss was true love. My brother loved me more than anything, and that was what fought the darkness. The feeling of his lips leaving my head were the first thing I could feel. That and his cold hand in mine felt amazing against my burning skin. Now, I could hear the sounds of everyone's sobs in my own ears. I was regaining consciousness! I had fought the darkness and now I could go home. I forced my eyes open and looked at my family, who, other than Alice and Edward, had no idea I was awake. Alice had gasped the moment Jasper had decided to kiss my head, so everyone turned to look at her.

“Jasper” I croaked. Everyone turned their heads to me as fast as they could, disbelief filling their eyes. 

“Lauren!”

[cg29]

4 Very Old But Short fics for the birthday boy himself - Virgil Tracy 💚

Sorry for not adding the Read More option, it doesn’t appear to be working.

***

1: 15th August - From Virgil Drabbles, C1.

I’ve been here before and I always swear, ‘Never Again!’

But then… It’s over and for a few seconds, which always feels longer, I hear nothing. Then the sound I’ve been waiting for… That first cry, followed by:

“Congratulations, it’s a boy!”

The relief washes over me, as I look to my husband. The obvious pride flowing from him as our new baby is placed in my arms, and his soulful eyes lock with mine.

“Do you have a name?” Someone asks.

It’s at that moment I know I’ll be here again.

“Yes,” I nod, “his names Virgil… Virgil Tracy.”

***

2: The Birthday Gift, part 1. Brotherly Love - From The Tracy Family, C4.

‘Mm, 7am.’ Virgil thought to himself as he opened his eyes slightly and glanced at the clock. ‘A couple of more hours will be good.’ To make himself more comfortable, Virgil rolled over in his bed, with his eyes shut, puffing up his pillow as he did so. Letting out a comforting sigh, his eyes flickered open and then shut. ‘Wait, what the…’ Virgil’s eyes shot open again. Okay, his eyes weren’t deceiving him. There was his oldest brother, sat on a chair next to his bed, bouncing up and down, like a nonstop Jack-In-The-Box. “Scott, its 7am.”

“Yes and?” Scott said happily, as he continued to bounce up and down on his chair.

“Scott, what is wrong with you… Or should I really ask, how much candy have you eaten?”

“None, yet… But the day is young!”

“And how many coffees have you had?”

“Only 2. Although I did have 3 energy drinks as well this morning.”

“Yes, I can tell!”

“Well, I needed the energy to keep me going for your big day.”

Seriously Scott, you are like this every year with all of our birthdays and I’m sure you get worse every year.”

“Yes, and?” Scott replied beaming like a Cheshire Cat.

“You do realise I’m 22 and not 10 today.”

“So?”

“Scott, we’re not kids anymore!”

Scott stopped bouncing up and down and surveyed his younger brother. “Yes, you are… You see little bro, in my head all I see is the excited kid who would rush out of bed so that he could open his presents, before shovelling down pancakes for breakfast and then stuffing himself silly later in the day with his birthday cake. I’m afraid Virg, that you are stuck with this for life. Even when we are all grey and old… I’ll be waking you all up early for your birthdays, even if I need to hit you with my walking stick to get you up. Besides, you need to get out of bed because Alan and Tin-Tin get back from their honeymoon later and it would be rude not to be awake and alert for when they arrive. Plus, Kyrano is making all of us pancakes, Grandma is making you a birthday cake, Penny is flying out here as well, then we can all have a big party later tonight and you can open all your presents.”

“Presents?” Virgil asked with a grin.

“Yes, presents… Lots and lots of presents. Of course, my present to you is obviously the best!” Scott started to become excited and began bouncing up and down on his chair.

Virgil lay on his bed and shook his head. “You know who you remind me of when you bounce up and down like that?”

“No, who?” Scott inquired beginning to clap his hands together joyfully as he continued to bounce up and down.

Virgil let out a laugh. “Tigger, from Winnie The Pooh.”

“Who...Hoo…Hoo…Hoo” Scott bellowed out loud at the top of his voice.

“You’re not letting me get back to sleep again, are you?” Virgil asked pulling his big eyes look at Scott.

“Nope! And you should know by now that look doesn’t work on me.”

“Please Scott, just 1 more hour? Then I’ll promise to get up.” Virgil pleaded, pulling his big eyes face again.

Scott stopped bouncing up and down and tilted his head sideways as he looked at his younger brother. “Okay, just 1 hour, and if you’re not up then I’m dragging you out of this bed.”

“Deal.” Virgil answered, relieved that he may finally get some more sleep.

Scott stood up and turned towards the door as Virgil settled himself down in his bed. “Nah, changed my mind.” Scott said as he turned back towards Virgil pulling the blanket of him. Virgil went bright red and made a grab for the blanket pulling it back over himself. “Oh, err… Sorry Virg. Err. Maybe I should have got you some Pyjamas for your birthday instead? Yes, anyways, I’ll be going… and let you get ready… Don’t be too long Virgie…

“Okay Scott, I’m getting up. Now get out.”

“Okay, I’m going.” Scott went towards the door.

“Oh, and Scott…”

“Yes bro?”

“Don’t call me Virgie!”

“Okay, okay,” Scott went to pull the door shut calling out to Virgil as he did, “see you in a bit. Oh, and happy birthday… Virgie!”

***

3: The Birthday Gift, part 2. The Last Gift - From The Tracy Family, C5.

Virgil sat by his piano in a world of his own, playing some new music, he had received for his birthday. Meanwhile, Jeff Tracy stood leaning against the doorway listening to the beautiful melodies that were flowing from his artistic son. “Virg?”

“Virgil glanced up from the piano and smiled at his father. “Oh, hi dad. Sorry I didn’t see you there.”

Jeff walked over to his middle child and sat next to him. “Did you have a good birthday?”

Virgil grinned while he continued to play the piano. “It was fantastic dad, thank you for the party.”

“Anytime son,” Jeff replied, pulling Virgil into a warm embrace.

Virgil returned the hug and then looked at his father. “Is everything okay dad?”

“Yes, it’s fine. I just… I wanted to let you know how proud of I am of you, all that you have achieved and everything I know you will become.”

“Thanks dad,” Virgil replied slightly blushing.

“Plus, I wanted to give you this,” Jeff pulled out a small box and a card from his pocket and handed it over to Virgil.

Virgil took the gift and card from his father and held it in his hands. “Thanks dad.”

“It’s not actually from me,” Jeff looked down, then back up into Virgil’s eyes, “it’s… it’s from your mother.”

“Ah?” Virgil responded looking at the gift in confusion.

Jeff breathed in deeply and continued. “Your mother’s family have always had a tradition… On a child’s first birthday the mother will chose a small gift that can be found within the home that they believe encompasses their child’s personality. They will wrap it and put it away ready for when they turn 22.”

“Oh… Why 22 and not 21?” Virgil asked.

Jeff chuckled to himself. “I remember asking your mother the same question. Apparently, even though 21 is usually seen as someone stepping into adulthood, the family itself felt that 22 was the official age, because when you are 22 then you’ve officially left those childhood years behind and become an adult… Your mother really wanted to continue this tradition and I remember how happy she had been, when it came to her picking out the gift, wrapping it and then writing the accompanying note… A short time after she had passed, I found the gifts for all of you boys packed carefully away. I decided that she would want all of you to receive them as planned… So, I gave Scott and John theirs when they reached 22, and now… Now it’s time for yours.” Virgil glanced thoughtfully at the gift and card in his hands, unsure of what to do. “Do you want me to stay, while you open it?”

Virgil nodded, carefully opened the card and began to read.

… …

My darling Virgil.

So, today is your 22nd birthday, that’s hard for me to imagine right now as I sit here writing this on your 1st birthday and stare over at you fast asleep in your father’s arms.

I know my son, that whatever you do, or whatever you will become, I will always be proud, and both myself and your father will always be there to hold you whenever you need a helping hand.

The gift I have chosen for you encompasses something I have noticed from the beautiful personality that you are starting to develop. Ever since you were born you have been soothed by music, whether that be a record, when I am singing you a lullaby, or when I am practising on my beloved piano. So, that is why I feel that this gift is perfect for you.

Always here, never far.

Your mother. xx

… …

Virgil with tears in his eyes passed the card over to his dad and cautiously began to unwrap the gift, revealing a small black box, which when opened played a gentle lullaby. “A Music Box.” Virgil exclaimed, with tears trickling down his face.

Jeff put his arm around his middle child and held him close. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, thank you dad,” Virgil replied wiping the tears away.

Jeff smiled as he looked at the music box. “I should have known she would have given you that music box. You loved that lullaby when you were a baby.”

Virgil smiled. “So, what did Scott and John get?”

“Well, it seems your mother sussed you all out really well. John was given a golden star that used to hang on the Christmas tree, he had been so fascinated by that star, even though he wasn’t that old on his first Christmas. He was also enamoured with the star mobile we had above his bed, I remember your mother saying he would probably end up in space just like me… And Scott…” Jeff let out a laugh. “Scott was always trying to climb the furniture and jump of it. Whenever he saw a bird or an aeroplane he would go quiet and watch with fascination. Your mother gave him an old air loom of her grandfathers, a small-scale Spitfire… Anyway, everyone is probably gathered in the kitchen waiting for you to cut your cake, are you coming?”

Virgil nodded, carefully picked up his gift and card. Then with his father’s arm placed around him they both left the room.

***

4: Birthday Wish.

Eighteen.

My first without you

Only one month you’d been gone

Our tears were still new.

Yet despite our grief

and my reluctance to celebrate

A party was given

In honour of the date.

Family and close friends

And no rescue calls

A good time was had

By one and all.

Then right at the end

After many speeches filled with praise

A cake was presented

With candles ablaze

Close your eyes they said

And concentrate really hard

Then make a wish

For whatever is in your heart.

So, I closed my eyes

And those candles I blew

I wished for you to return

But it never came true.

…

Nineteen and Twenty

One injured, the other a major rescue call

Yet at the end of each day

I was presented with a birthday ball

After food and drinks

And everyone felt contented

A cake with candles aflame

Was once again presented

Time to make a wish

My family all said

So I hoped and I prayed

And I pictured you in my head

Then, I closed my eyes

And those candles I blew

I wished for you to return

But it never came true.

…

Twenty-One.

Was the biggest of them all

Except by pretending to forget

Their plans went slightly AWOL

A diversion rescue

That was meant to just stall

Swallowed my whole day

And made me miss this year’s ball

The very next day

Although I’d protested

They offered to make it up

And a birthday cake was presented.

I gazed down

Twenty-one candles all gleamed

All awaiting my hopes

And my dreams

So, I closed my eyes

And those candles I blew

I wished for you to return

But it never came true.

… …

Twenty-Two and Twenty-Three

Had candles shining bright

Would these years come true

If I wished with all of my might

So, I closed my eyes

And those candles I blew

I wished for you to return

But it never came true.

… …

Twenty-Four

A trip to our other home

Gran Roca Ranch

Where we had all grown.

A morning with the horses

An afternoon barbecue

The evening watching the sunset

Where my silent thoughts turned to you

Were you still out there

Or were you really gone

Would we ever know

Or was it time we moved on.

Except I couldn’t give in

Not yet, not ever

This year if I wished harder

Maybe my next birthday would be better

So, I closed my eyes

And those candles I blew

I wished for you to return

And on my twenty-fifth birthday it came true.

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Little Mercury protege; AU Alive!Freddie Mercury x Malek!teen reader

*Author’s note*

Okay well guys I didn’t get inspired till Freddie’s birthday had passed, so I know this is late but here is a request I think should’ve been done. To the anon who gave me this request, I hope this is what you were wanting. And I hope to all of you who read this get a thrill out of this :)

Okay warnings; FLUFF. bit of angst, racial discrimination (I mean NO OFFENSE BY THIS if this makes you uncomfortable just skip ahead and don’t read the one scene in question), and just personal opinions on a certain fact of another casting choice (if you belong to team S.B.C playing Freddie, please don’t start a war with me on this okay.) 

Taglist:

@psychosupernatural

@plethora-of-things

@ixchel-9275

@waddles03

@geek-and-proud

@queendeakyy

@coolcxt

@platawnic

@leah-halliwell92

________________________________________________________

Being the daughter of Rami Malek sometimes has its perks.  I’ve been going with him to premieres, I’ve seen my dad film some of his shows, but now my dad is about to become a legend as he had just gotten the role of one of my favorite lead singers of Rock and roll.  Freddie Mercury.

For the past eight weeks my dad has been in London practicing his piano skills, because he and the rest of the actors would begin to film the first sequence which was the famous Live Aid performance. And since I had to finish up school, he wouldn’t allow me to come visit the set but now that it’s summertime, my jida (grandma) got me my plane ticket to London so that I could visit my dad on set.

After a long night flight, I finally arrived in London and as soon as I came out of the gate, there I saw my dad holding a sign that said.

“Welcome (y/n)” in full decorated lettering colored in with markers, stickers and glitter.  Dad smiled at me and said.

“There’s my girl.” I raced over to him and hugged him and he hugged me back just as tightly. “How was the rest of your school year?”

“It was fine.”

“How’d you do on your finals?” I shrugged and he said. “Oh no, no c’mon now don’t you lie to me. You know I could call your uncle Sami to tell me how you did.”

“I passed dad, got all A’s and B’s.”

“Ehh that’s my girl.” He ruffled my hair and kissed the top of my head. “Wait, are you getting taller?” I giggled and he wrapped his arm around me and guided me away from the gate to the luggage claim.

“So how’s piano lessons going dad? You up to Freddie Mercury standards?”

“Well let’s face it no one except maybe Elton John could match Freddie’s piano skills, but I’d say I’m up to it darling.” I fangirled a bit and said.

“God you can’t drop the mannerisms can you?”

“Guess even off camera I find myself doing minor Freddie things.”

“But it’s so awesome that they picked you to play Freddie, I can’t wait to see you in full getup. So are the cast friendly?”

“Yeah we’ve really bonded with each other very well. Especially the band and I. It’s like we’re the new generation of Queen.”

“Who all’s playing the rest of the band?”

“Ahh now that is a surprise.” I whined out. “Don’t pout you’ll meet them once we get to set. We’re gonna film Live Aid later today once the weather’s just right.”

“I can’t wait.”

“I know you can’t. You’ve made me watch that footage every Live Aid anniversary since you became a fan of Queen.” We arrived at baggage claim and we waited till my suitcase finally came out.  He grabbed hold of it and guided me out of the airport and the two of us hopped into a car and drove off to set.

Since this was my first time in London, you know as any tourist I had to take pictures of what I could.  The Big Ben clocktower, the London Eye, the many statues, everything and anything in between.

Finally after about a 2 and a half hour drive, we finally arrived at an abandoned lot where I could see hundreds of people running around a mock stadium.

“So this is where you guys are gonna be filming?” I asked.

“Just for Live Aid. The original stadium was torn down so our brilliant set design team found this area and built Wembley stadium from the ground up. You’ll get a better look at it once you see if from the front.” I ahhed in understandment and that’s when our car stopped and he said. “You ready to see everyone?”

“A little nervous too.”

“Don’t worry darling, everything will be alright. You trust me?” he held out his hand for me.

It was a common thing he’s done to help ease my nervousness, and yeah we did kinda steal it from Aladdin but hey it works.

“Yes.” I said as I reached out for his hand and he helped me out of the car.

“Just stay close to me and you won’t get lost among the volunteers and workers.” I held his hand and he guided me towards the stadium.  We went around it and when I finally got a good look at it, I was just in awe.

“Whoa.”

“Pretty cool huh? So does it look like Wembley stadium?”

“It’s…..it’s like we’re actually there. And you said they built it from the ground up?”

“Yeah. Did it all while the guys and I were practicing our instruments. C’mon I need to get to makeup anyways so might as well show you that during our tour.” He then guided me over away from the stadium and we went into this large van-like trailer and there I saw rows of chairs and makeup areas.

“Ahh Rami glad to see you’re back.” A voice said. When I looked up, I thought I was actually looking at Brian May back during the original live aid.  God this guy he—he’s practically Brian.

“Yep, traffic wasn’t too bad getting out of the airport.”

“So is this your daughter?” the Brian look alike asked.

“Yes. (Y/n) this is Gwilym Lee, our actor for Brian May. Gwil this is the light of my life, (Y/n).”

“It’s so good to finally meet you (y/n). Rami would not stop talking about you. I’ve been looking forward to this for weeks.”

“Really, well here I am. And can I just say that you look—exactly like Brian May.” Both my dad and Gwilym chuckled and he said.

“Thank you, I only hope Brian himself approves. I’m told that Queen’s gonna be coming here to watch us perform.”

“Wait—Queen’s coming here? As in all four members?”

“Yep.” Oh shit. “So I hope we all don’t screw up, that’d be the next big disaster.”

“I’m sure we’ll do fine Gwil.”

“Yeah well see you on set. Nice meeting you (y/n).” He and I shook hands with each other and then he left to probably get into wardrobe and costuming.

“Alright Rami, you’re turn.” One of the makeup artists said.  My dad sat down and he got fitted into his wig and got his makeup done.  It wasn’t until he put the teeth in and the famed mustache, that I swore it was like my father was actually Freddie Mercury and not Rami Malek.  Once he was done he turned around and said.

“Well darling what do you think?”

“You look—amazing dad.”

“Thank you, you lovely darling.” Okay now he was really getting the mannerisms done, god I love it when my dad gets committed to a role.

“Right now I need to get into my costume and then we’ll head out to punch a hole in the sky. What do you say dear?”

“Lead the way, Freddie.” I said.  He wrapped his arm around me and we were now heading to the costume trailer.  He got into the famed Live aid Freddie outfit of the white tank-top, jeans, Adidas black and white sneakers, and the diamond encrusted black armband.

Okay it’s official, I am Freddie Mercury’s daughter.

In full get up my dad had not only acted the part but also looked exactly like Freddie.

We were now heading for the stage where I saw Gwilym talking with another man who wore a should length blonde haired wig and wore the Roger Taylor white shirt and black pants.  He was twirling around some drumsticks and that’s when the two of them turned towards us.

“Wow, you look awesome Rami.” The actor playing Roger said.

“Rami? I’m only Freddie darling.” I playfully giggled and rolled my eyes at him.

“And I assume this is your daughter?” he asked again.

“Yep, that’s (y/n). (Y/n) this is Ben Hardy, he’ll be playing Roger Taylor.” Gwilym introduced us.

“It’s great to meet you at last (y/n).” the actor known as Ben held out his hand and we both shook hands.  Now I’ll admit I don’t know why they gave him the wrong wig but he did sorta resemble Roger to a degree.  I’ll just have to wait and see how he portrays Roger in the film before I make any quick assumptions.

Suddenly I was picked up by the waist and twirled around.  I shrieked and told whomever it was that was spinning me around to put me down.

“Ahh now that’s no fun. Is that anyway to treat your favorite uncle?” Oh my god it—it couldn’t be? I quickly turned around to see a big ball of fluffy brown hair but I knew those eyes and that sunshine smile anywhere.

“Uncle Joey!” I exclaimed as I turned and hugged him. He laughed and embraced me in those big arms of his giving me a big bear hug.  He laughed as he spun me around and pressed a big kiss to my cheek.

See I had known the famed child actor Joe Mazzello since I was 5 years old.  Just shortly after my dad had gotten a role in the HBO series ‘The Pacific’, my mom got into a car accident by a drunk driver and was killed before she even got to the hospital.

I was devastated as was my dad.  Since my uncle Sami was too busy to take care of me at the time and figuring out that I needed my father now more than ever, my grandma and auntie sent me to be with my dad.  

I was so quiet and barely spoke a word, all I did was just sit far away and cry.  It was then I had met Joe, he said he hated seeing kids cry so he tried to make me smile by telling me some jokes of showing me funny cat videos.  Amazingly it did make me feel a bit better, at least got me to smile since the accident happened.

As my dad and Joe became closer with each other and soon became best friends, I got to call Joe Mazzello my uncle Joey. And since we were all in New York, anytime my dad had to go away to film something, nine times out of ten Joe was the one to babysit me until my dad got back.  

Fun little fact, he’s the one who introduced me to Queen during filming of “The Pacific”.  He set me back down and I exclaimed.

“You’re in the film too?!”

“Of course, I thought your dad told you.” I turned to my dad and he briefly broke character as he said.

“I wanted to surprise you. Figured it’d be nice to know that I wasn’t the only one you’d know in this film.”

“So you’re playing John Deacon?”

“Yep, I can’t believe I even made the cut myself, I was stressing out like you wouldn’t believe it. And all they wanted was to hear my accent.”

“God I just gotta say, like Gwilym you—look exactly like John Deacon.”

“I know, so much so that I just had to ask my mom what she was doing in 1983, whether or not she was in London or anything.” I chuckled and hugged him as I said.

“Ahh I’ve missed your dorkiness uncle Joey.”

“Hey it’s not dorkiness, it’s coolness that people wish they could have.” He said as he gave me a playful noogie. “So tell me what’s been up with you in the last two years since I’ve seen you?”

“Well I’m about to go into high school.”

“Get out of town!” he teased.

“No seriously.”

“Oh my god where has the time gone? When I first met you, you were in the middle of kindergarten and now you’re going into big bad high school. Why couldn’t you just stay that adorable little girl that used to hang around my waist and that I could cradle in my arms?” he leaned his forehead against mine and gave me a gentle and loving peck on my nose.

“Sorry uncle Joey, I had to grow up.”

“Noo! I’m Peter Pan and I forbid you from growing up anymore!”

“Alright you big softie layoff her.” Ben said.

“Shut it Benjamin!”

“Okay guys, they’re pulling in now to see the performance. Get into positions.” At this point all four men including my dad were really starting to feel the nerves.

“Who votes for hiding at this point?” asked uncle Joey. All three of them raised their hands and soon we all took off running.

I don’t know how it happened, maybe with a sharp turn or maybe my grip slipped from my uncle Joey’s hand but as we went to hide from the arrival of the band in question, I ended up separated from my dad and his friends.

And since the set was so big, I didn’t know where they could’ve gone.  I kept trying to go down a hallway but it only lead me further and further down more corridors and hallways.  God the production team wasn’t fooling around when they got every single detail down.

That’s when I bump into someone.  I was taken back as I quickly apologized but when I finally looked up to see just who it was that I bumped into, that’s when I just felt the deer in headlights freeze come over me.

For standing there before me was the legend and my number one idol in music, Freddie Mercury.  He may have looked much older than he used to back in the day long before my time, his once raven black hair now greying like snow on the road but he still held that famed spark of a true showman even at the age of 70.

“Well hello there darling. A young newbie groupie welcoming committee.” He said with that famed smile of his.  He gently ruffled my hair which made me blush but I couldn’t help but smile.  But it wasn’t until I noticed that he was also referring to my Queen t-shirt that uncle Joey got me as a birthday present last year and I wrapped my arms around the pictured embarrassed.

“Now, now there’s no need to be ashamed love. It just means you’ve got good taste.” Roger spoke up.

“Alright you two no need to embarrass the girl further.” Deacy said.  It was then Brian stepped up and asked me.

“What’s your name love?” Oh my god Brian May just called me love.  Though I’ll never admit it, when I was little I did have a bit of a crush viewing some of Brian’s old videos.

“(Y/n). (Y/n) Malek.” I said shyly.

“Malek? You don’t mean like the same Malek dear that’s playing me would it?” I nodded and he said, “Oh that’s perfect. Have you any idea where your father is (y/n) dear?” I shrugged.

“I—I sorta lost them I guess.”

“They wouldn’t happen to be hiding from us would they?” asked Roger.  I shrugged and remained silent.

“Well I think we’ve got the perfect leverage to get them out, wouldn’t you agree lads?” Deacy said.  Oh I did not like where this was going.

I was then guided by the four senior band members up onto the actual stage where I saw crew members running about and extras getting their markers on where each person should stand.

“So we came across this lovely young lady while getting the layout backstage, and I know she was in proximity to the young actors portraying us.” Freddie exclaimed loud enough so that the people on stage could hear.

“And we did come such a long way it’d be a shame to not see the young men in full shtick after taking such time off our hands.” Brian said.

“So if you young boys would kindly come out we’d greatly appreciate it.” Answered Deacy.

“If not then we’ll just keep the girl hostage until you lot decide to come out.” Roger playfully threatened.

“NO DON’T TAKE HER!! SHE’S JUST A CHILD TAKE ME INSTEAD!!” I heard my uncle Joey proclaim.  It was then coming out from behind the flaps of the stage, were my dad, uncle Joey and Gwilym and Ben.

“Ahh so there they are. Knew using this lovely darling would get you four to come out of hiding.” Freddie teased which caused all the guys to blush or look away.

The four legends of Rock and roll then walked up towards their counterparts and studied them carefully.  Brian looked like he had went through a time relapse as he stared at Gwilym Lee.

“Bloody hell it’s like looking at me former self, but….” He then began adjusting the hairline of the curls slightly as he said, “The curls actually go this way.” I softly giggled and that’s when I noticed John Deacon stand before my uncle.

“Not bad, I must say you—you definitely resemble me to a T.”

“Believe me Mr. John Deacon sir I—I couldn’t even believe it myself, but the second the wig came on it was—mind blowing.” John smiled and said.

“It’s almost like in a way you’re a long lost child of mine.” Right? Roger was looking at Ben and he even agreed there were some critics but he knew it wasn’t Ben’s fault, mostly blame hair and makeup but Roger did give his sign of approval.  But when he said he couldn’t wait to hear Ben play the drums, that’s when I noticed Ben went a bit pale.

And now the moment of truth was when I turned towards my dad to see Freddie circling around him like a lion circling its prey.

“A bit skinner than I was, different eye color but hell I always wanted to have blue eyes. But like Brian and Deacy they chose the right one. At least you’re a lot better than that previous actor they tried to get to play me. God what an arsehole.”

“It’s an honor Freddie Mercury, I know I wasn’t the best choice but—”

“Oh don’t be so humble Rami darling. You already look the part, now I look forward to seeing you act the part. Cause of course no one is as outrageous as me.”

“Alright lads. We’re all set up. We’re ready to film the entire Live Aid sequence from start to finish.” Dexter came up with his cup of coffee.

“Go kill em boys.” Brian wished them all good luck. Dad came up to me and he gave me a hug and a kiss.

“Ready to see Live Aid?”

“I’ve been waiting nine years to see this dad. You guys are gonna kill it out there.” The guys went behind the flaps for their cue to rush on out, but then just before I could step aside in the wings to watch that’s when Freddie said to me.

“Hold on darling, come down and watch it with us. You’ll get a much better angle than from the stage.”

“Ohh I couldn’t impose on you four I—”

“Nonsense love, c’mon I know your dad would want to see you clearly as he performs.” Roger insisted.  Okay who was I to deny them? I then walked down the steps with them and we watched at the lower level of the stage as everyone was getting into their final places.

“Alright guys full run through. No stopping. Extras cue your cheering!” The crowd began to cheer. “Sound! Roll camera. And……action!” Soon my dad and the rest of the band came running out on stage causing the cheering to go louder.  I even cheered along as I took out my phone and couldn’t help but take a few pictures of my dad, uncle and their new friends in full getup.

Then the run through began.  Even with the actual audio from Live Aid rolling since my dad couldn’t sing a tune, it was still amazing to see him actually playing the piano of Bohemian Rhapsody and uncle Joey playing the bass.

I briefly turned to look at the four rock gods and they all looked amazed, it was like they had jumped back in time to see their greatest performance for themselves.  Brian especially couldn’t believe his eyes and same thing with Freddie.

As promised by Dexter it was the full run through of Live Aid.  Once Radio Gaga came on, I couldn’t help but participate in the claps, and I noticed that not only the extras but some of the crew members who were behind the stage or even behind the camera were participating.

The Aye-oh’s, Hammer to fall, Crazy little thing called love, We will rock you, and We are the champions.  And just seeing my dad up there becoming Freddie Mercury, it was unbelievable.  

The dedication he had put in to becoming this legend whom I have always looked up to throughout my whole life.

By the end of the run through, I was cheering so loudly that if I were to turn around along with them applauding for a well performed first take, Queen was smiling at me seeing my excitement and pure joy.

When the guys walked backstage, I immediately raced over once Dexter called cut to find my dad.  Once I spotted him I immediately raced over to him and glomped him in a hug.

“That was amazing daddy! You guys slayed it!”

“Thank you baby girl.”

“You were amazing up there.”

“Well that’s because I knew you were watching.” I giggled and hugged him again.

“Ohh I see go hug your dad but no love for your uncle.” Joe teased.

“Ohh uncle Joey.”

“No, no, no I see how it is. I’ll just continue to go through the film being neglected from my favorite snuggle-cuddle bunny.” He said as he crossed his arms over his chest, turning his back on me.

“Snuggle-cuddle bunny?” Ben and Gwilym gaped.

“Yeah see when she was just five during our filming of the Pacific whenever she got too tired, she’d always cuddle up close to me. And since she always had this pink bunny wherever she went I dubbed her snuggle-cuddle bunny.” I blushed embarrassedly.

“I will cling onto you for the rest of the time I’m here if you take that back.” I pleaded.

“Not a chance kidda-roo.” He pulled me into his arm and playfully gave me a noogie.

“Well done boys, that was phenomenal.” We turned around to see all four members of Queen standing before us.

“They definitely chose the right boys for the job. I can’t wait to see what else we’ve got planned here.” Roger said.

“Seeing that performance brought me back to the real Live Aid concert. Well done lads.” Said John with a warm smile.

“You four lovely darlings. It’s like you four were born for the stage, just like all of us. Work your magic just right and you could be the next generation of Queen. You look the part and now you sound the part. Especially you Rami you beautiful darling.” Freddie then walked up to my dad and gave him two kisses, one on each cheek.

From then on the filming commenced with the final approval of Queen seeing my dad and the rest of the cast in full shtick.

As the weeks went on and they were starting to film the Rockfield farm scenes, I was in the building since everyone was on a break before filming would begin.  I sat down by the piano and lightly stroked the keys.

I then raised my hands and I played the first Queen song I had ever learned “Somebody to love”.  I did a bit of vocalizing before finally singing the song.

Each morning I get up I die a little Can barely stand on my feet Take a look in the mirror and cry Lord, what you're doing to me I’ve spent all my years in believing you But I just can't get no relief, Lord! Somebody (somebody) somebody (somebody) Can anybody find me somebody to love?

“I know you’ve got more soul than that darling.” I ceased my playing to see Freddie standing behind me. He walked over and sat on the piano bench beside me and continued, “Don’t hold back, let it out.” He then picked the song back up and stared at me nodding for me to go on.

I went straight to the bridge where I would usually give the song as much soul as I could.

Got no feel, I got no rhythm I just keep losing my beat I'm OK, I'm alright I ain't gonna face no defeat I just gotta get out of this prison cell One day I'm gonna be free, Lord!

Somebody (somebody) somebody (somebody) Can anybody find me somebody to love?

I guess my nerves made me repeat the last couple lines that really belonged in the first and second verse, but as Freddie nodded along to the song, he looked like a proud teacher watching his student succeed, especially when I made that key change on the ‘love’.

And what was even more amazing; was when Freddie actually joined in singing my favorite Queen song with me.  He first played off of my at the beginning but by around the middle, the two of us blended out voices together in perfect sync, while at the same time the two of us were playing the piano.

(She works hard) Everyday (everyday)

I try and I try and I try But everybody wants to put me down They say I'm going crazy They say I got a lot of water in my brain Ah, got no common sense I got nobody left to believe in Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

As he continued playing the piano I quickly grabbed the first guitar I could and began playing Brian’s solo.  Not only was I good with the piano, I was also fairly decent with the guitar.  I mean I can only play a few songs on guitar but Somebody to love, I could practically play every instrument cause I can just hear the tune in my head.

We then sang the repeated mantra and just to add a little spice I began to vocalize. Going up and sliding perfectly down or going from a low to a high rang. By the end of it, I took over the last two lines.

Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love

Can anybody find me….

*Me*

Somebody to……

Love.

*Both*

Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love Find me somebody to love

By the end of our playing, all I heard was the sound of an applause.  There standing behind us were some of the crew, the producer Graham, Dexter the director, Brian, Deacy, Roger, my dad and the rest of the cast.

Freddie stood up and gestured towards me and the applause seemed to get louder.  I even heard some whistles that you could only hear at a rock concert.  

That’s when my dad came over to me and embraced me as tight as he could and peppered kisses all over my face, repeatedly telling me he was so proud of me.

Later on that day I was out on the deck sitting on the stoop of the house.

“I was wondering where you had gone off to since our duet. Figured you’d want to be basking in the praises.” I smiled and said.

“I don’t want to get a big head full of ego. I deal with that at school already from those who think they’re richer than me.”

“I understand that well darling. Little children can be bastards can’t they?” I hummed in agreement.  “You really do have an amazing gift (y/n). Why don’t you share it with those who don’t know you?” I looked down solemnly.

“Well Freddie…..how can one share their gift when they look like me?”

“What the fuck are you talking about dear? All I see in front of me is a blossoming young woman who is not only beautiful but talented as well.”

“It’s not about beauty Fred, I know I’m beautiful it’s just….I’m the wrong skin color.” He paused and just stared at me, urging me to go on.  “I—I did try to perform once at my 6th grade talent show. But just before I could play I heard one boy cry out ‘why’s the terrorist playing the piano? I thought they played bombs?’ It…..it was just after the suspected suicide bomber tried to sneak into the New York subway but was detained and stopped. I couldn’t even perform after hearing that. Took me a whole weeks before I had the courage to go back to school.”

I sniffled and tried not to cry in front of the frontman of Queen.  But I felt him rub my back as I continued.

“If middle school was that bad, I can only imagine just how worse high school’s gonna be. My dad was mistreated and bullied during his school year. So that means I will be too, and not just physically but online too possible.” I felt a few tears fall from my face, until a finger wiped them away.

“My darling (y/n). If there’s anything you should listen to me on, it’s this. People can be utter little shits. Some people still stick with the ancient ways of thinking, that if you’re not their skin color then you aren’t worth their time. Believe me, I’ve had racial slurs being shouted at me, both on and off stage. What you can do, is look them in the eye and say fuck you. Because I know who I am. And I don’t let anyone define who I am as a person. Because people who talk down to you like that, have got no future ahead of them. You on the other hand my dear, I could see you getting a gold disk by the time you’re 19 with that voice of yours. Hell you’ll surpass both Elton and I with the way you play the piano.”

“Well I don’t know about that.”

“Of course you will. If Sharon heard you, she’d be begging on her hands and knees to let you perform alongside them.” I looked at him confused.  “Oh that’s our drag queen alter egos to each other. I’m Melina and Elton’s Sharon.” I ahhed in understandment.  “So darling, you can either do two things; One you can take those comments and let them control your life. Or like your father step out there and show the world just who (Y/n) Malek really is. From how your father’s been portraying me in this film, I have no doubt that that lovely darling is going to win so many awards, including the famed Oscar. And soon enough little girls that are Arabic and Egyptian will look up to you and say when you win your first Grammy ‘is she could do it, so could I’.” I smiled at him and said.

“You really think so?”

“I know so darling. I believe you’re going to go far in the music industry one day. Or whatever you choose in life, it don’t have to be music if you don’t want it to be. But if you are ever interested, when you’re a little older the lads and I would love to have you as an opening act for our tours.”

“Wow that’s—it would be an honor Freddie.”

“You deserve it you lovely darling.” He said as he gingerly ruffled my hair.  “Now (y/n) I have to ask you because every fan has expressed this especially through a website called Tumblr.”

“You know Tumblr?”

“Still trying to get a grasp of it, mostly I just look at it for the cat pictures to see if I could get in contact with some good photographers for my lovely children back home.” He fully turned towards me and continued, “Of course you can choose not to answer it. Though I feel like if you don’t answer it though, it’ll only prolong…..”

“What is it Fred?” I laughed out.

“Who amongst us four aging Queens do you favor most?”

“Trying to make me be the bad guy.” I mocked.

“I didn’t say that.”

“Well that’s what that question means.”

“No I—just wanted to know if you have a preference.”

“So that you can get a bigger ego if it’s you?”

“So it’s me?”

“No Freddie. You maybe my idol but that doesn’t automatically mean you take the number one spot.”

“So not one of us has that special place in that golden heart of yours?” I lightly scoffed and said.

“Well…..”

“Ah-ha I knew it! So c’mon just tell me. Think of my as one of your little girl friends gossiping in gym class, I won’t squeal I promise.” I groaned as I buried my head into my lap.

He wasn’t gonna let this go, I can feel it. But if I didn’t I knew he’d just keep pestering and pestering until I finally cracked.  I then softly muttered the name of my favorite Queen member.

“Huh?”

“Brian.” I muttered slightly louder.

“I’m sorry love you’re gonna have to speak up. Me old ears aren’t what they used to be.” I smelt bullshit on that statement.

“Brian, okay it’s Brian.” I said to him.  Freddie grinned and said.

“I sorta had a feeling. You always seem a bit more shyer than Deacy whenever our smart animal loving, spaceman guitarist is around.”

“Just promise me you won’t say anything to him!” I pleaded.

“No worries darling, my lips are sealed.” I sighed with relief. “Now how’s about I teach you how to play Bohemian rhapsody? Your uncle Joe told me of how you once tried to play it but couldn’t get the keys right.” He stood up and held his hand out to me.

I took it and he lead me towards the other side house where my dad would be playing the song in question for a brief moment in the film.

I’ll say that never did I imagine that I would get an actual piano lesson from the Queen legend himself.  But here I am at the piano with Freddie Mercury sitting beside me teaching me how to play his famed song, the baby that changed the way music was ever made forever.

However little did I know of the ultimate embarrassment that I would have within the next couple of days.  Right now everyone was filming the guitar solo recording as well as the operatic session of Bohemian Rhapsody.

But what was fun was that we actually got the real Brian May to step in while uncle Gwil stepped aside and we allowed Brian to play his guitar solo in the song, just for the fun of it.

I was in awe as I leaned against the arm of my chair and just let Brian’s red special take me away on a flight across the galaxy.  When the solo ended, uncle Gwil stepped back into the shot and I heard my dad say as Freddie.

“That’s brilliant. I love that.”

“So now what?” asked Gwil as Brian.  My dad took a beat before saying,

“The operatic session.” Both uncle Gwil and Brian May nodded as I could hear Gwil say.

“Ahh the operatic session. Good.”

“Of course.” Brian spoke in the same tone as Gwilym did.

Oh god it was so uncanny of how similar these two were at this point.  They definitely chose the right actor to play my favorite Queen member.

When break time came around and I was getting a snack from the snack table and drinking some water.  I soon heard a voice say.

“Hello (y/n).” I choked briefly on my water as I turned to see Brian standing there. “Sorry love I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“It’s okay. Just went down the wrong pipe is all. I’m-I’m-I’m-I’m good. What—what are you I mean….” Oh god why am I so starstruck right now in front of him.  You’re making a fool of yourself (y/n)!

“It’s okay (y/n). There’s no need to be shy around me. Beyond the titles and glamour I’m just like every other man my age.” Yeah except the fact that you’re not only a rock god but a brilliant astrophysicist as well as animal organizer.

That’s one of the main reasons why I had followed his Instagram because I loved getting the updates on all the animals he posts up and interacts with.

“So what do you think of the film so far?” he asked me as he took a seat beside me on the empty chair.

“It’s amazing. I mean I’ve been to sets before with my dad like the Mr. Robot, the Pacific where I met uncle Joey over there, but this—this is unlike anything I’ve seen. And just the fact that you guys are allowing young fans like me to see your story from the beginning.”

“Yeah we were on the fence about but we knew that if we all didn’t get involved with the project then it wouldn’t get done right.”

“I’m glad you guys get to come visit whenever you’re not busy doing your concerts.” I shyly admitted.

“Well thank you (y/n), that’s very sweet of you to say.” I lightly blushed and twirled my water bottle around letting the water spin around.  “You know funny thing Fred told me the other day. He said he had talked to you and asked you about who your favorite Queen member was.”

Oh fuck no.

“FREDDIE!!” I screamed as loudly as I could.  It was the both my dad and the real Freddie peeked out from behind the booth saying.

“Yes?”

“I mean the real Freddie dad! Why did you tell him!? You swore you wouldn’t!?”

“Word of the wise darling, never trust me with a juicy secret. Especially when it regards to secret crushes or fancies.” I groaned and felt my face glow red in embarrassment.

“Aww (y/n) look at you, you’re like a little pouty tomato.” Uncle Joey teased in his John Deacon get up.  I turned away and hid my face as the guys all continued to awe at me.  It was then I was brought into a big but gentle bear hug from Brian himself as he said.

“No need to be embarrassed love. I’m flattered.”

“Okay that’s it, this calls for a photo it’s too damn adorable.” Uncle Joey proclaimed.

“Took the words right out of my mouth, Joe.” My dad said.  I was humiliated! Soon enough pretty much everyone of the guys needed a picture of this but that’s when Ben said.

“Wait! I’ve got a better idea. Gwil get in there.”

“Ooo good thinking Benjamin, what’s better than one Brian May?” uncle Joey awed.

“Two Brian Mays!” they both exclaimed.

“I hate you guys!” I whined out.

“Now, now mind your uncles (y/n) they mean well.” Brian said to me.

“Besides, we’re always happy to indulge our number one fan.” Gwil spoke as Brian.

“Great minds think alike.” Praised Brian.  Soon I had uncle Gwil to my left and the real Brian May to my right.  Each of them had their arms wrapped around me and leaned down against me as everyone took out their phones.

Suddenly I felt both of them kiss each side of my cheeks and that’s when my heart really sped up and I felt like I was gonna explode. But of course everyone just awed at how adorable I was.

“Oh my god (n/n) you look so freakin adorable. This is so going on my Instagram.” Uncle Joey said.

“Post that pic and you’re dead Mazzello!” I threatened.  I then chased after him and he took off running. “Give me that phone! You’re dead Mazzello!”

“Jesus someone get this raptor off of me!” I managed to hop onto his back and reach for his phone but he kept drifting left or right trying to avoid my reach as his arm extended as far as he would allow it.

As the summer began to draw to a close, unfortunately I couldn’t stay in England anymore because I was about to go back to school in just four weeks.  

So a week just before open house started, I had gotten my ticket and was ready to take the non-stop flight from London back to New York.

My dad, uncle Joey and newly deemed uncle Gwil and uncle Ben as well as Lucy, my dad’s new girlfriend came to bid me a final farewell till the award seasons would begin come around Winter break.  I was currently hugging uncle Gwil as he said to me.

“Hope to see you for the award shows love. Good luck in high school.”

“Thanks uncle Gwil.” I then turned to uncle Ben and he said.

“You know you don’t need an invitation, come here.” I giggled and he wrapped me up in his strong arms. “Have a safe flight back to the states love.”

“I will uncle Ben. Send me more videos of your drumming, maybe one with you and Rog together.”

“We’ll try and arrange it.” He gave me a kiss on the top of my head and that’s when uncle Joey said.

“I don’t know whether to feel squishy or be jealous.” We both laughed and I said.

“Don’t worry uncle Joey. You’ll always be my favorite uncle.”

“Oh no I was actually referring to Ben.” I faked a gasp and punched him in the arm making him cry out. “I’m kidding squirt! God you’ve got a strong arm, when did you get so strong?” I rolled my eyes at him and hugged him.

“Bye uncle Joey.”

“See yah soon kiddo. I expect a call every single night and a facetime after your first day of high school. I don’t care what time it’ll be, I will freakin answer it and have these three with me to chat with you about your first day.”

“I’ll call and text you, don’t worry.”

“You better.” He bopped my nose before giving me a long, wet kiss right on my cheek.  I groaned and whined out as I wiped away the access spit while he just looked at me all innocently.  I then turned to my dad and Lucy.

“Take care of my dad while I’m gone.” I said to Lucy.

“Don’t worry I’ll make sure he doesn’t work himself too hard. It was great to finally meet you (y/n), and thank you for your approval of us.”

“You’ve made my dad happier than I’ve seen him since mom. It’s…..just like Freddie and Mary were, you are the love of his life. And I can see that.” She smiled and the two of us hugged each other before I turned to my dad.  He brought me into his arms and he said.

“Be sure to text me as soon as you land okay?”

“I will I promise. Thanks for letting me stay the summer dad. I know you’re gonna do great come award season.”

“All I care about is that you’re proud of me and that you’re happy about the project.”

“I am.” He cupped each side of my face and kissed the center of my forehead.

“Last call for flight 5487621 nonstop to New York City.” We heard over the intercom.  I grabbed my bag and bid my family a final farewell and they waved goodbye to me as I handed the gate keeper my ticket and boarding pass.  

He accepted it and allowed me to walk in with the flight attendant who would keep an eye on me throughout the flight since I was an unaccompanied minor.

She lead me to my seat and helped put my luggage up along the ceiling console.

“If you need anything else, just ask for the name Tabitha.”

“Thank you Tabitha.” I thanked her and she smiled as she walked off.  I then went into my purse to take out my phone to turn it off but before I did, I noticed a group chat with four numbers I didn’t recognize.  I unlocked my phone using my passcode and opened up my messages to see the following.

Hello (y/n), this is John Deacon. I hope you have a safe flight. It was wonderful to getting to know you, and you have so much talent to give to the world. Good luck with your final young years of school before you move on to university. I know you’ll soon go far in life if you stay as you are.

And….Always be happy 😊

I smiled as I read the next message under that.

Hey lovie,

It was so great to meet you, you’re sweet, loving, and have an ear for talent. Thank you for being a fan of ours and for always supporting us.  You’re an amazing kid (sometimes I wish my own were like you at your age hehehe) anyways thank you for coming to visit us and see the filming. You made our days brighter whenever you were on set. Good luck with high school and crush all those bastards who think you can’t make it. I’ve got a solo single coming out soon and you shall receive the first copy signed by yours truly.

Rock hard and….havealovely flight, bye 😉 Roger Taylor

He even gave me the drum emoji and I couldn’t help but smile as his final farewell sounded like the old fan club message they gave in 1991.  I scrolled down again and I saw the next message.

Hello (y/n)

I hope you have a safe flight back to the US and that you enjoyed seeing London for the first time.  It was great to meet you and as the previous two have said, you are talented.  I know eventually you’ll make it big in whatever you do.

Also thanks for the lovely support you’ve helped given to some of my animal organizations, I greatly appreciate it. You are a kind soul and I know that you’ll grow up to be an even kinder young woman. Lots of love from me and safe journeys home my number 1 fan.

-Bri.

I blushed.  God I still can’t believe Fred tattled on me about my secret girl crush on Brian.  That was going to loom over me for the rest of my life, especially since he had sent a copy of the picture of him, Gwil and me with that double cheek kiss and my ugly shocked face.  Then finally I read the last message who I already had an idea by now of who it was from.

My little protégé *sparkles emoji*

I had a wonderful time of not only getting to know your lovely father, but his radiant daughter as well.  You Maleks are gonna go far in life. Thank you for gifting us with your sunshine aurora and bubbly personality.

If you keep believing in yourself and face each day with courage and pride about who you are, you’re gonna slay them all and even break some hearts along the way. (And if any break yours first, you just let me know and I’ll sort it out darling)

Have a lovely trip back home and I hope you come to see us at our next concert in Madison Square Garden after all this award seasonal shit is done.

Keep smiling and lots of love and hugs

Freddie Fucking Mercury *heart eyes, kisses emojis*

I smiled and held my phone close to my heart.

“Excuse me Ms. Malek, we’re about to start taking off, may I please ask you to turn off your phone.” I nodded but not before quickly making a screenshot of the messages from each of the band members and saving it to my phone.

Separately labeling it as POSITIVE FEEDBACK.  I then turned off my phone and prepared for a long flight back to the states to meet with uncle Sami since the high school I was going to was the one he teaches at.

As we took off into the air I kept thinking to myself of all the great memories I had with my family and couldn’t believe that even meeting the band that I have loved for almost ten years now.  They treated me like I was part of the cast family.

And I will take that with me to my grave.

*Extended ending*

“And the winner is…..Rami Malek!” I cheered as loudly as I could as tears of happiness came running down my face. Sitting with my uncles Joe, Gwil and Ben as well as other cast and crew members of the film we all stood up and cheered as Allison Janey and Gary Oldman presented my dad with the Oscar for Best Actor for Bohemian Rhapsody.

I hugged my uncle Joey as he lifted me off the ground and I kissed his cheek and he peppered kisses all over me.  Uncle Gwil wrapped me in his arms and uncle Ben hugged me from behind and kissed the back of my head as we all tried to calm down so we could hear my dad’s speech.

God he deserved this. Golden globe, Emmy, BAFTA, SAG, AACTA and now Oscar winner.  Not only was this is first Oscar nomination and award, but he would forever be known as the first ever Arabic actor to win an Academy award.

“And one final shout out to a very special young lady who is out there somewhere with the rest of my cast. This award also goes out to my beautiful daughter who is now starting to figure out her own identity as she marches towards the final steps of life. This award goes out to her, to show her that if I can do it, then so can she. I love you my baby girl, thank you for believing in me. For being my number one fan forever and always. And I love you 3000 my heart.” He blew a kiss towards the camera and I couldn’t help but cry.

I felt uncle Joey wrap his arm around me as he rubbed my arm up and down, leaning his head against mine placing a kiss on top of it.

“I love you 3000 too baba.”

At the afterparty when my dad came in after doing some interviews, we all cheered and the first one to glomp him in a hug was uncle Joey.  They patted each other’s backs in a brotherly manner before Gwil and Ben stepped in and the four of them group hugged with each other.

“Where is she?” asked my dad.

“I’m here baba.” I said.  He smiled widely and came over to me and immediately hugged me.

“You did it dad, you’re a champion.”

“No lovebug, we are the champions.” I smiled and buried my face into his neck as he placed his hand behind my head and he just held onto me.

Being the daughter of Rami Malek would soon change my life after the Oscars.  Now that everyone knew my dad’s name, he was going to go on to do bigger and bigger things. Like just recently he’s been named the James Bond villain.  And now his famed show Mr. Robot is coming to an end.

But even through the bigger fame to his name, he still remained as humble as ever and still managed to make time for me as I continued on throughout my high school years.  

And when the time came for me to graduate I saw all my uncles, my dad, auntie, grandma, on Instagram live (curtest of uncle Joey) I knew Queen was watching from all the way across the sea, and my new stepmom Lucy all cheering for me as I was given my diploma.

Yeah, life was good.  And I sure as hell had a pretty cool dad to be there for me whenever I need him.

[bring-forth-your-justice]

Chapter 1: Troubled Mind (Reader x Akira Kurusu)

So um, I wrote a fic. I already have 3 chapters complete for this long fic. When I say long, I mean very long *cough* 15,293 words *cough*. So a bit of context to the story, it ties in with persona 3 because of the reader’s past. As well a major change to the story (won’t reveal it because I’m not so sure on whether to add it in or leave it out.) Hope you enjoy reading this piece of trash.

You couldn’t be late to school, not today.

You ran past people in a panic to reach the subway. The forecast said it was gonna rain today, but your wonderful and brilliant brain forgot that. Not that it mattered anyway, you had no idea where your umbrella went.

Thankfully it wouldn’t rain for another hour or so, that was your saving grace for the day. You only wished it could’ve been used for something else though.

You reached the subway just in time and pushed your way into the cramped train, managing to grab the last seat. You held your bag tight, so tight that you could’ve sworn that your papers were gonna be in crumples by the time you left. “Maybe today won't be as hectic as I predicted”. You thought to yourself, as you tried to doze off for the duration of the ride for Shujin Academy.

Normally you were never late, not once did you ever miss school, and you wouldn’t dare over sleep. After all, you were the student council vice president! You were a straight A student for goodness sakes! You were the person every student would look to for help and advice, a role model. Only second to Makoto, but even then you both were identical in terms of efficiency and marks.

So why were you late?

Well, you weren’t late, not really. It’s just your student council meetings start before school does and that's what you couldn’t be late for. You had many things flooding your mind last night and you ended up over sleeping.

Luckily your 3rd alarm woke you up. If not for that, Makoto would’ve freaked and sent enough messages for the constant dinging to wake you up.

The train had stopped and you made your way past the other passengers. You put your headphones on and started making your way to school.

As you made your way towards the school, you spotted the alleyway that Ryuji and you would walk through together. You flinched at the thought of just hanging around Ryuji again. As badly as you wanted to again, as badly as you wanted to say sorry and make him smile, you couldn’t. There was just something standing in your way, why lie to yourself? There was someone in your way.

The gloomy clouds plagued the skies above you but it didn't matter now, you’d finally reached school. Walking through the empty halls seemed to take more effort than usual. It seemed the feeling of the desolate halls had caused you to forget about your surroundings, as you had tuned out someone shouting your name.

“Y/N! Y/N! CAN YOU EVEN HEAR ME!? Oh GoD!” She hollered, as she tried to close the gap between the two of you.

You lept back as the girl caught up to you and grabbed your shoulder. She then continued to slump forward, crouching, in an attempt at catching her breath. “Arine? What’s wrong?! You look exhausted.” You say in confusion as you take out the headphones from your ears. 

Arine suddenly shot up at what you had said, with only frustration to be dissected from her expression and beads of sweat showering down from her hair.

You jumped back at the sudden action, still dazed with her conduct.

“Are YOU REALLY asking ME if there’s something WRONG with ME!?” She retorted back, still huffing, slightly slouched. Just as you slightly parted your mouth to respond to her, she cut you off. “Never mind that, c’mon the meetings gonna start. I was looking to see if you had came or not. But, like always, your right here.” She sent you a quick loving smile and grabbed your left hand, and dragged you to the council room.

“ Sooo..er..Arine, why exactly were you so upset?” You spoke shyly, you were now walking beside her, retaining your elegant stature. Arine was a first year, and the treasurer of the student council. Although a very small and timid girl, she proved to be very enthusiastic around those she knows well.

“Well, besides the fact that you made me run after you around the school, and made me look like a fool for yelling and screaming your name about 4 billion times..” She spoke sarcastically as she turned to face you. “ The..” You noticed the sudden shift in her expression, from one with glee to one with dread and unease. Your face didn’t falter from its blank expression, but you felt concern ebbing away your lifeless expression.

“It’s j-just the..um...the t-transfer s-student”.

The transfer student? Wha-oH WAIT! “OH, yes of course! It seems as if I had forgotten about him. I just had a lot on my mind the other night, and I forgot he was coming today.” You spoke with more confidence.

“But why exactly are you mortified by just talking about him?” You slyly inferred. Arine shot her head down, being both shocked and embarrassed by you noticing her dismay. “Oh, um. Well, err you see..uhh.” She choked on her words, making it hard for you to understand why this student brought out her inner demons just at the mention of him.

‘GOOD LORD! Was this boy the new coming of Voldemort!?’ You thought, with concern now evident on your face.

“A-apparently he’s currently on probation for ASSAULT! A-and I overheard some of the teachers that he’s really d-dangerous, they said that if he had a knife that day...he wouldn’t be convicted of assault but ..m-murder.” Arine started to tremble. You slid your hand into hers in an attempt to rid of her quivering. “I’m not one to judge on rumors….but if he’s as menacing as you say he is..” You took a pause in between your thoughts, slowly biting your lip with the situation at hand.

“I’ll be careful, and hey! Don’t worry, I won’t let him hurt anyone. Including you, so quit your worrying!” You said blissfully.

Haha..how would that even work? You couldn’t even save your brother, father, or even yourself! Pathetic, you want to save your friend and the school while you can't even escape the people who hurt, torment, and abuse you. You lie to yourself and now you lie, to her.

Arine’s face slowly lit up with more of your false assurance. The two of you reached the council room, and were greeted by Makoto and the others. Makoto rushed to your side to give you a small but strong hug. She asked what had taken you both so long. You sheepishly explained that you overslept and were in a world of your own thoughts before Arine came along. Makoto was shocked at the fact that you overslept, and continued to say that she would personally enter your house and wake you up. After that, the meeting had finally begun.

“Y/N wait!” Makoto said just as you was about to leave the modest, dimly sun-lit room. “Hmm? Something wrong Mako?” You and Makoto have been childhood best friends since middle school, always by each other's side.

Things were rough after your mom, dad, and big bro died. After all, you were only 4 and Taro was 12. Your oldest brother, Taro, was left to take care of you but at the time, you had your grandma. When she passed, Taro was 17 and was on his way to becoming a prosecutor. That’s where he met Sae-san. Their friendship lead to you meeting Makoto. You both had so many things in common, your love for knowledge, books, kawaii things and of course, the need to be like your older siblings and bring forth justice! But besides your interest, you both shared the pain of losing your parents and loved ones. You depended on each other when the world around you seemed to collapse, when the pain and grief resurfaced. When the occasional sibling fight happened, the other would always spend the night at the others house.

When the other didn’t have an interest in one particular area, the other would force them to do it with them. Makoto doesn’t know how to play piano or skate so you drag her with you. Cooking and aikido comes as a challenge for you so you’d tag along with her and learn a thing or two.

You told each other almost everything. Feelings, opinions, secrets, hopes and dreams. Including a secret only she believes when Taro can’t except it..

You know in your heart that, that secret is no secret, but the truth. The truth that won’t ever be told until you find the killer. . .

“No, nothings wrong but um, Miss. Kawakami had asked if you would show the transfer around the school?” Makoto asked shyly, fiddling nervously with the pencil in her hand. You were in shock. Usually the homeroom teacher would be the one to show the student around. Though you wouldn’t argue with a teacher about showing a student around, it was just this student. After what Arine said, you weren’t so sure about this.

“I certainly don’t mind, but why? The teachers usually show them around, am I wrong?” You asked.

“Yes, it is the teachers duty but, you and the transfer are in the same class. So Miss. Kawakami thought it would be good if he got to know someone in his class. She also mentioned that it would be wonderful if he had such a marvelous and outstanding influence as his first ‘friend’ at this school.” Makoto clarified.

“Alright, I guess you already know what I’m doing this morning. Honestly though, I’m honored that she’d think so highly of me.” You let out an embarrassed chuckle.

“Obviously, you’re an amazing student. Not to mention an even better best friend. Speaking of which, you told me Taro is not coming home tonight, you watnt to spend the night at my house?” There was no way you wouldn’t take up the chance of staying over at Makoto’s just talking and goofing off.

“Why would I say no? I mean, my dance class was canceled today, and I could always reschedule my shift. As long as Sae is ok with it, I’ll come over right as I get something~ from my house!” You said winking. “Oh please tell me it’s ‘that’ thing! Also Sae’s always ok with you coming over, so don’t worry about that.” The two of you exited the room and headed towards your classes, laughing at the random jokes that each of you would insert into the conversation. You said bye to Makoto as she walked down to the third-year floor.

You walked into the classroom, with all the students in groups and talking about the latest gossip, trends and so on. As you went to take your seat, you would get the casual stares from some of your admirers. You stood out from the other students, partially because of your very different uniform ( a black waistcoat with white accents, the Shujin skirt, black thigh high boots, A white button up collar shirt, and black tights. Along with a headband in your hair.), but it was mostly due to your brandeis blue highlights.

They weren’t highlights they were part of the aftermath of what happened one year ago. You tell others that they’re highlights to hide the truth.

You sat besides Takamaki-san, she looked agitated, and distressed. The girl was looking down at her desk while fiddling with her blonde, curly hair. You didn’t really know the girl, you’ve never really had the chance to talk with her. You’ve wanted to but... you don’t know what you’d say to her. All you actually knew about the girl was she and Suzui-san are best friends, and that she's half american, a kind girl whose parents are always overseas due to work. Then there were the rumors with her and Kamoshida, the volleyball coach, an award winning athlete.

Ah~ There it was, you already figured out the reason behind her melancholic expression.

You knew how scary and menacing Kamoshida could be, from first-hand experience. You did whatever you could to be far away from him and his counterpart, Kaito-kun. No one knows that Kamoshida has harassed you too. After all on the outside it doesn’t look as if you’ve been hurt by him, but on the inside your dying, a soul pleading for any form of help. You’ve tried, you’ve tried saving others plus yourself from him. Sometimes it worked but all your efforts puts you into a dangerous zone with him instead. To save others you’ve put yourself in vain.

If you knew about a volleyball player that he was gonna ‘call out’, you’d jump to their aid by using the little authority you have, to ask the volleyball player to help you with a student council duty. That way, they wouldn’t have to see Kamoshida. But your efforts to help others backfires on you when he catches you.

“SHE’S HERE! Everyone get to your seats!” One student hollered.

“OMG Kiyoshi! SHE’S COMING! MOVE!” Another student yelled as she pushed a girl out of the way, presumably Kiyoshi.

“MIYAKO!!” Kiyoshi squealed just as she tripped and hit the ground face first.

‘Ouch!’ You thought.

Miss. Kawakami walked in through the sliding doors and all the students scrambled to get to their seats. Miss. Kawakami let out an annoyed sigh, she looked deflated and exhausted. “Okay, everyone settle down. Settle down! Uh, Yuki-san can I talk to you outside?” She spoke sounding incredibly tired. You nodded and walked outside the classroom; outside to the empty hallway.

“I’m glad you said yes to giving the transfer a tour.” She said with a faint smile on her face. Was she always this burned out? You felt as if she would fall over any second now, so much so that you mentally prepared yourself to catch her fatigued body.

“Frustrating as it is, the boy hasn’t arrived at school yet! So I suppose for now just relax but if he does show up, then I’ll come find you. Alright?” She asked.

‘Wow, late on the first day! It’s really becoming harder not judge this guy! No, you promised yourself you would never make assumptions and judge others without knowing them!’ You thought to yourself, mentally scolding yourself in the mix.

You told Miss. Kawakami that she could rely on you and not to worry. She let out a tired but grateful sigh. “It’s great to have such a dependable student, unlike that Sakamoto. Looks like he’s not coming to school again..”

Your eyes widened. ‘Ryuji, why would you miss school? I get it, this place is hell! But you hafta stop getting yourself in serious trouble!’

“Oh...I see. Well that’s unfortunate.” Your voice was laced with sorrow.  

“If he had only stayed on the right path, he could’ve made a great student. After all he was once a star athlete.” Miss. Kawakami unknowingly had added insult to your already aching injury.

‘Bullshit, It was all Kamoshida’s fault! He stole his future, THAT PERVERTED BASTARD SHOULD BE THE ONE THAT GETS HIS REPUTATION TAKEN FROM HIM! He HAS to pay!’  Your thoughts fueled your anger.

‘But how can I put an end to the pain, and him..’

[bangbangchanie]

Thankful For you~ Han Jisung

Summary: Were your parents and family met Jisung on Thanksgiving

Pairing: Han Jisung × Reader

Warning: cute fluff with slight angst? Kinda? Also long.

"Okay, but are you sure they'll like me? I can bearly keep up with English sometimes an-and I showed up a day later than planned...babe stop laughing!" Jisung whined in the passenger seat of your car, your eyes were watching the road as you peeled out of the airport traffic onto the freeway.

"Baby, they'll love you. You've technically met them before, you know face time?" You said as you switched land, your eyes glancing over at the Ash-blonde boy you fell in love with over a year ago. He was visiting America for some trip for school when he literally ran right into you. After that the rest was pretty much history, skype calls and snapchats were your life. You had met his parents six months after dating, traveling halfway across the world to jump into his arms. Then awkwardly wave at his mom and dad who watched the whole tear and laughter filled hug.

That was the trip he told you about the boys, he spoke of training with them and how they all clicked. He spoke of the show they were gonna do, to prove to JYP they could do anything. Now a year later here he was, dyed hair, earrings, and a nervous mind rushing in the thought of your parents hate him.

"But that doesn't count, it was nearly five minutes and you pushed them out. I was also not an idol yet, I'm..I'm just a bit nervous." His voice drifted into a whisper making you smile as you took one hand off the wheel and placed it onto his thigh, giving it a small squeeze you looked over and gave him a smile before your eyes trailed back to the light traffic of the road.

"They'll love you, I know they will babe." You said making him huff as he grabbed you hand off of his thigh and laced his fingers into yours. His eyes looked at your interlocked hand with a large smile spreading across his face. How he had missed you, several months after debut, promotion, and comebacks had to lead up to the ache in his heart. Short and sweet skype calls, where'd he only see your face for what felt like five seconds, late-night phone calls where one of you always fell asleep halfway through. It was short to no reply messages on his end, and it killed him not speeding as much time as he did before debut talking and loving you.

"I missed you." He blurted out making you blush as you squeezed his hand that was locked with yours as you turned off of the freeway, the houses slowly filling the empty space. Your eyes look over to him as you stop st a red light.

"I've missed you too, do you know how much I missed the simple act of you holding my hand?" Your words made him chuckle as he curled slightly into himself, his cheek dusting a light pink making you smile as you quickly lean over and press your lips the burning skin.

"The lights green!" He jolted out making you chuckle as you press on the gas and turn. "So what..what is Thanksgiving? Like I kinds know but I don't at the same time."

"Its a celebration of the programs and Native Americans had when the Native helped them, showed them how to grow crops and use the land productively. It was shown thanks between the tribe and Colony. Now its a day where we Americans go into a food coma, Turkey, stuffing, potato and so much more. We eat till we fill like well pass out." You Chile turning down your road, "Its a day to be thankful, thankful for the roof over your head, the food on your plate and the people in your life. A day for family and friends to come together eat some food and tell stories. Aunt judge and uncle drink beers. It crazy, and different for every family." You finish off as you pull into your driveway. "Now, look at me real fast baby." You mumble turning in your seat. His brown eyes were wide, the cars of the family outside your home making him slightly panic as you reached over and grabbed his hand.

"I'm I that nervous looking?" He whispered, finally slipping into his English. You chuckle as you reach over and cup his cheek making him closing his eyes as he took a deep breath.

"So the first level, my mom and dad." You say making him nod as his eyes snap open, you'll walk in with your bags and wave. My mom will most likely come over and greet you with a high, my dad will wait till you bags are in my room. Which took me a month to convince them to let you sleep in there, door open at all times." Your words had him laugh as he grabbed the hand on his cheek a played with your fingers. "My dad probably won't say hi, or hold a conversation with you. It doesn't mean he doesn't like you. He watches body language, he watches you interact with his girls, he watches before he speaks. But still say hi, he believes in respect." Your word made him nod as you pause, letting his brain process your words, you lean forward and press a small kiss to his lips.

"Okay, so say hi put my stuff in your room, and say hi again?"

"Yep, exactly."

"Okay, I can do that."

"Okay next, my Great gran, she will pinch your cheeks and hold your hand while the two of you talk. She's the easiest person in the family to get to, shell loves you as soon as I introduce you as my boyfriend...but then there my Grandma. She will be a bit harsh, you'll question how my mom is hers. But shes just protective. My aunts and uncles will be a bit gossipy, they'll whisper about you. But ignore them, they're options to me don't matter, just mom, dad, Gan and Grandma matter. And all the cousins will see you as a new jungle gym."

"Okay..okay I see...shall we go in?" He mumbled making you nod as you open your car door. His body following, grabbing his duffle and backpack he grabbed his two suitcases. The next two months' worth of close trapped between the fabric. "I'm scared." He whispers as you move to the open front door, unlocked screen door trapping the wagging dog that heard your car.

"Don't be, this is Mags." You say as the two of you walk into your warm house, the smell of Thanksgiving surrounding the two of you as you hear loud laughter and children giggling. "Mom, dad!" You called out leading Jisung through the house to the kitchen, the family talking as your mother chopped up some carrots. Her eyes looked up, seeing you standing there, a shy boy somewhat hiding behind you.

"Y/n, Jisung-Dude your daughter's boyfriends here." Your mom said, her hand slapping his arm. As your father head turned, you could feel Jisung grow tight ss you saw his hand wave. Your father just looks at him a grunt out a hello and goes back laughing with your uncle. "Oh, that man." Your mother says walking over and pulling your boyfriend into a hug.

"I'm thankful your flight was safe, I'm sorry it was canceled yesterday must've been a really bad rainstorm." She said making him nodding as he scratched at the back his head. You could see his gears in his head turning as his mouth moved.

"Yeah, the lighting was bad." She gave him a smile as she pulls back and rubs his arms. "Well go get your stuff to her room, and settle in before you throw yourself to the wolves." Her analogy made you groan as you shook your head and gave her a glare as you nodded for Jisung to walk to the hall.

"Don't scare him."

"You're lucky he wasn't free during Halloween. He would've been pumbled with pumpkin guts." You chuckle as you follow after the ash-blonde you hand leading him to the open door of your room. Pacing his bags down you kick your shoes off and fall into a lounge chair you had in your room.

"Welcome to the magical place!" You giggle, photos of Jisung and you pressed into a poster broad, as well as their first-ever Group photo, and any cute photos you could find of him online. He smiles at the small support as he saw their mini albums you had bought on your desk. His hand traced the wall, where your parents aloud you to draw. There a large oak tree, with Winnie the Pooh and Piglet at the base were a jar of honey in Pooh's hands. It made your boyfriend chuckle as he took his shoes off.

"I like it, very... you." You chuckle and nod as he's moving to sit on the arm of the chairman "I see you clearly like my bad."

"Day6 is way better." You mumble peeking up from the screen of your phone you were on. You say his jaw go slack as he slowly turned his head to glare at you.

"Oh really?"

"Yep, amazing. Iconic and so different. I love Jae and Wonpil." You laugh as he jumps you slightly his hands gripping your sides as you let out a loud laugh. His future ger pricing against the flesh under your shirt. "Ji-jisung!" you laughed he pulled away and pressed a quick kiss to your lips.

"Okay, I'm ready." He mumbled making you nod, as the two of you stood up, your hand lacing with his as you ran down the hall the attempted to slid into the kitchen.

"Hello family, this is Jisung, my boyfriend!" At the mention of your boyfriend, you Grest Gram gasps and clapped her hands.

"Let me see him!" You laugh you see JIsung cheeks grow red. "Come to her boy, let me look at you." He left you hand and walked to the sitting woman, he grabs a free chair and sat next to her. Her wrinkled shakey hand moved to his cheeks and gave him a look over as you moved to the counter reaching over to steal an olive as you listened in on the conversation.

"Hello Ma'am." He mumbled making her laugh as she pinched at the chubby cheek of your boyfriend making him slight wince as she parted it afterward.

"Handsome, just like I thought. I hear you sing? I would love maybe after dinner to play piano and you sing for us." Her words made her boyfriend pink cheeks turn scarlet as he looked down at his hands.

"Id... I'd love to." She smiled as she grabbed his hand and nodded.

"You're English is good, I know it's not easy. I didn't go to school half my life so mine sucks and all come from that little girl shoving olives into her cheeks." Her words made you look up and playful glare as Jisung chuckles.

"You..you didn't go to school?"

"Nope, I left in the being of my eighth-grade year, when my dad fell ill. My brothers, sister and I helped run the farm, we all left school at a young age. We lived in Iowa, Stormlake. I remember the days where I longed to go to school, but life doesn't always work out like that. You do what you have to. You do what you need to do for your family, that family is what matters you know? Cause sometimes it all you got." He gives him nods, taking in her words as you moved over. Your body slipping into his lap as you wrap your arms around his neck.

"Tell him about the corn ." You say, as she smiles, Jisung swears he saw the memory of her life flash in her eyes as she presses her hands to her lips.

"Oh, that cornfield! Wed pull pounds of corn every year and take the best pick for ourselves, wed spend a week shucking corn, cutting and taking it off the cob. We made out own popcorn so we, of course, had to dry it out. God, it was a system. You know back then you couldn't just have one kid, you had to have a cluster, five to seven. It kept the house running." For the next house, Jisung and you listened to your Great Grans stories, how she lived at your age. How her life had changed and how she misses her farm, her childhood home and her family of course.

"Hey, guys time for dinner!" Your father says making you stand up as your Grandmother helps your gran move to the other table. As you walked out, you father called to Jisung making you freeze as you swear you watch the boy pale. "Have you ever craved a Turkey?" He asks making the boy shake his head, your father smiles and waved him over. "Let me show you, kid." A smile lifting on your lips as you let go of his hand and walked to the table.

"Dad get ahold of him?" Your mother asked making you nod.

"I knew he would."

"He liked the way he listens to Gran. You know most of your aunts won't even spend time talking or listening to her. They act like she a child, and not a women." She said making you nod and you look to said people, clearly gossiping about the boy in your kitchen. "You know, their option doesn't matter." Your mother whispers making you nod as the two of you help set up the children's table.

"I know."

Soon Jisung and your dad walked into the dining room the final piece of the table setting down on two plates, his body moved quickly to sit next to you. A large smile on his face as he grabbed your hand and kissed it.

"I love you." His words caught you off, not the two of you haven't said. No, it was how fast he said with without context, something new.

"I love you too."

"I approve." Your father said moving behind you to sit next to your mother. Soon you said you thanks and began to eat, chatter spreading in your house.

"So Jisung. What exactly do you do?" One of your aunts asked taking a sip of wine.

"Oh um, I'm a rat of a kpop group, as a band? Um I rap and sing. I help compose the music, and produce, we work very hard and I love doing it." He said, as if he had practiced it off a scrip, his eyes look to you then to her as you squeeze his hand. Your aunt nodded and look to the other making him tighten his grip in your hand.

"Do you have a problem with that?" You snap, as they begin to whisper and laugh, Jisung head slightly falling as he picks at your food. Your aunt's eyes widen as she looks at you, surprise written across her face.

"Well, it just...just doesn't seem practical. Like he's what 18, my dream when I was 18 never happe-"

"So you do have a problem with it?"

"Wel-"

"Cause if you do, keep it to yourself. I don't see you chasing your dreams, hell you didn't when you were his age. He did and he made it. They won rookies of the year, which mean the big people noticed them. They went to K-kon New York, all nine can somewhat speak two to three languages and are spreading about honest things that youth suffer from, that idols suffer from in the industry. You don't know him. You don't know how passionate he and his members are, you don't know his job. And until you do, you shouldn't be able to judge him on it." You finish with a nod as you take a sip of the soda next to your plate. You give her a fake smile and turn to a smiling Jisung his head turns to face you as you peck him on the lips. "I'm thankful for you." You mumble looking at him, his eyes gleam as he looks back down at the ever filling plate in front of him.

"I'm thankful for you too."

[tagsecretsanta]

From Marsmckie

To  @tuupang 

Secret Santa does not own this piece, full credit goes to the creator mentioned above!

It was a small family tradition- it became standard over the years that on a quiet night sometime in December the Tracy Family would all grab some old blankets and make their way down to the beach. This festive season was particularly quiet for them, giving the recent incarceration of their nemesis the Hood into GDF custody, and they indented to take full advantage of it.

Sadly, Grandma Tracy was away shopping with Lady Penelope, though this did mean the food was prepared instead by Virgil and Scott. Virgil provided the barbequed turkey and Scott brought the apple pie dessert. MAX rolled around on the sand handing out dishes while the family lounged out on blankets or camp chairs under the stars.

“John,” EOS whispered. The space monitor had constructed a portable device so that the AI was able to join them for what was her first Christmas. She had coordinated her LED lights so that they alternated flashing between festive green and red as she spoke. “I’m not sure I understand. Campfires and barbeques do not fit in with what my research suggests would be a typical seasonal celebration.”

“That’s because with someone somewhere around the world who always needs to be rescued around this time of year, the idea of us having a ‘normal’ Christmas Day is laughable,” John responded with a smile, pleased with his AI’s development to be comfortable asking questions.

“We take our holiday breaks as they come,” Alan explained. Having crammed down his large helpings of turkey, barbequed vegetables and pie he had moved on to toasting marshmallows over the campfire. As he moved his stick away from the flame, Gordon made a move as he snatched the marshmallow off the end of the stick and shoved it in his mouth. “Hey! Get your own!”

“You’re hogging the bag!” Gordon said through a mouth full of marshmallow.

“Everyone has their own different ways of celebrating Christmas,” Kayo said, continuing talking to EOS as Gordon and Alan squabbled.

“Y-yes!” Brains said. “For example, at m-my University we had a C-Christmas tradition for Secret Santa that whoever could make the b-best seasonal invention didn’t have to clean the lab for a whole month!”

“Is that where your snow machines originated?” Virgil asked. Brains nodded with a smile. “I’d say the year that Brains made it snow on the island will always have a special place in our hearts!”

“We did a Secret Santa at my school too!” Gordon said. “One year I bought Bethany in my year a chocolate snowman!”

“Didn’t you leave it near the radiator and it melted?” Scott grinned.

“Heh, yeah, it looked more like a chocolate thingy!” Alan laughed.

“Oh yeah, I forgot about that. She was so annoyed when she unwrapped it and I never fessed up,” Gordon grimaced.

“I don’t think we’ve had what you would call a traditional Christmas since we were young,” John said. “When we were still living at the Gran Roca Ranch with mom and dad...”

“Oh, right...” Alan mumbled. His memories from the ranch were few and far between.

“Mom was always the one to organise decorating. I remember her voice as she taught me how to play Christmas songs on the piano and she’d sing along...” Virgil said sadly.

“You and Gordon might be too young to remember,” Scott said to Alan. “But I remember the first Christmas after Mom passed away. Dad hadn’t done anything to prepare or celebrate at all, but then when we woke up on Christmas morning we all went down the stairs together and there were all these twinkling lights we could see under the door. We went in and the whole room had been decorated top to bottom, and Dad told us that Santa had been overnight...”

“And Dad scooped us up into his lap one at a time to give us the presents that Santa had left!” Virgil said excitedly.

“Of course it was Dad getting up early to decorate while we were still asleep,” John explained.

“Well, yeah, we know that now,” Virgil murmured, looking put down by the revelation.

“I do remember that!” Gordon gasped. “There were all these golden twinkling fairy lights; it was like magic!”

Scott sighed. “We were all so surprised. Dad was so determined to make it the best Christmas ever, and it was like we finally had him back after Mom died...”

A sad silence settled over the group as they all watched the crackling of the campfire.

“What about you, Kayo?” Alan asked, determined to fill the silence. “Did you have any family traditions?”

Kayo snorted. “Try anytime we had a family Christmas. By that I mean ~the whole family~”

It took a moment for the group to realise what she meant, before the revelation from earlier that year resurfaced in their minds.

“Oh my god, yeah!” Alan gasped.

“Wow, what would Christmas be like with the Hood as your uncle?” Virgil wondered.

“Please tell me he was one of those uncles who would get drunk and sing rude versions of Jingle Bells?” Gordon laughed.

“I’m pretty sure that was just Uncle Lee!” Scott grinned.

Kayo made a face halfway between a smirk and a grimace as she remembered the last time her uncle had last shown up at the family home at Christmas.

~~~

Tanusha punched her way across the living room floor, shadowboxing inexpertly as she was determined to show off her new Karate uniform (to go with her Christmas present of Karate lessons- something which she had been begging for weeks to get). Her father smiled fondly at his growing girl while her mother prepared a delicious Christmas dinner. They were late to eat together as her father had spent most of the day at work (Tanusha was always dying to know more about her father’s job as Mr Tracy’s security, but he kept annoyingly tight-lipped about it).

As her mother was about to plate the food, there was a knock at the front door. Her mother and father shared an anxious look before her father moved to open the door.

“Uncle Belah!” Tanusha cried, running around her father and into her uncle’s waiting arms.

“Tanusha!” Uncle Belah beaming, sweeping her into a big hug. “My, how you have grown!”

Tanusha had been besotted with her Uncle Belah for many years now- while her father had the strength to lift her over his head and throw her in the air, Uncle Belah would regale her with the most fascinating tales of daredevilry and espionage that kept her hooked all evening. She had relentlessly questioned her Uncle as to what his job was and he would spin many a tall tale as to what he had been up to between visits, but Tanusha -being his favourite niece after all- was quickly able to pull the truth from him-

Uncle Belah was a top secret spy in the Global Defence Force.

Tanusha had gone along with the story when she had been little, thinking it to be another one of his imaginary jobs (he had previously claimed to be a caterer and an airline pilot among other things), but every so often Uncle Belah would produce an item which would tie into his story- a computer tablet, some solar batteries, on one occasion even the metal wings that he had worn while jumping out of a skyscraper. At the appearance of each item Tanusha’s eyes would go wide with wonder.

Such items were for Tanusha’s eyes only, and they (along with the stories) were hers and her uncle’s little secret together from her father and mother.

Uncle Belah stood from hugging Tanusha and the atmosphere froze as he locked eyes with Tanusha’s father again.

“Gaat,” her father said coldly.

“Kyrano,” her Uncle greeted with a small grin.

“And what brings you here?”

“Christmas is a time to spend with family,” Uncle Belah said, spreading his arms wide. “Or am I not welcome here anymore?”

Her father pursed his lips and Tanusha looked up hesitantly. “Daddy?” she asked.

“So long as you bring no ill will against my family,” her father said quietly, stepping back from the door to allow their visitor to enter.

“Much obliged,” Uncle Belah hummed as he stepped inside and took off his wool coat, revealing a black tuxedo jacket, white shirt and black trousers beneath. “It is cold outside.”

“Uncle Belah!” Tanusha cried again, latching onto his hand and pulling him into the living room. “I got you a present!”

From under the tree, Tanusha extracted a small lone present and pressed it into his hands.

“That’s very thoughtful of you!” Uncle Belah gave a genuine smile as he accepted the present.

“I didn’t know if I would see you or not, as you’re always so busy with your job,” Tanusha said. Behind them in the kitchen, her mother and father conversed in hushed tones but her attention was solely for her favourite uncle. “I got it for you anyway, just in case we saw you.”

“May I open it now?” Uncle Belah asked, shaking the box in an attempt to discern the contents.

Tanusha giggled. “Of course!”

Uncle Belah carefully ripped open the red wrapping paper to reveal a black box containing a red tie covered with silver dots. He ran the tie through his fingers, feeling the silk material before tying it around his neck.

“Thank you Tanusha,” he said, smiling. “I shall wear it always to remind me of you.”

Tanusha beamed brightly and pulled her Uncle through to the dining room as her mother announced, “Dinner is ready!”

Tanusha made sure that Uncle Belah was sat next to her at the circular table and throughout dinner they shared secret mischievous looks as they ate. The looks her mother and father shared were filled with concern.

“Uncle Belah?” Tanusha asked loudly as her mother refilled the adult’s wine glasses again. “When are you going to marry?”

Uncle Belah nearly choked on his wine and Tanusha noticed a glint of amusement in her father’s eye at his brother being caught off guard by her question. “I’m not the type to marry, my dear. After all, I am fully committed to my job.”

The look on her father’s face soured again.

“Aww,” Tanusha murmured. “I wanted to have cousins.”

Uncle Belah laughed good-naturedly and the meal concluded with several rounds of Christmas pudding with custard. Tanusha wanted to stay up and talk for longer, but her parents made the decision that it was her bedtime. She sadly said her farewells to Uncle Belah, clinging to him and begging him to say she could stay up late, but he agreed saying the adults needed to talk.

Her mother chivvied her upstairs, but while she was distracted Tanusha slipped back down to listen to their conversation.

“Listen to me, Gaat.” Tanusha heard her father’s voice and paused on the stairs. “If the Hood continues to cause problems for Mr Tracy’s company then I shall be forced to take extreme measures.”

“I assume you have already alerted the GDF to my location?” Her father said nothing in response. “Then I shall be on my way. I will say farewell to Tanusha before I go.”

Tanusha’s heart leapt into her throat at the mention of her name, but her father cut in coldly, “That won’t be necessary.”

There was a pause in the conversation and Tanusha thought her uncle had left, until he said, “You are choosing the wrong side, Kyrano.”

As her Uncle closed the front door behind him, Tanusha rushed back up the stairs to her mother. That night, Tanusha quizzed her father about why her uncle had to leave so suddenly and he replied “Uncle Belah is in trouble with his work.” From this, Tanusha was able to discern that he was in trouble with the GDF and that somehow Mr Tracy’s company was involved. She guessed that she also would not be getting a Birthday present from him for a while.

That was the first time Kayo would hear of the Hood, though it would be several years before she learned who that was.

[raisingsupergirl]

A New Age Dawning

I once met a Freemason who said he changed his career ever seven years, a concept he based on the seventh sabbatical year of the Old Testament. And it wasn’t like he moved to a different position within the same career field. He made drastic changes: professor, salesman, laborer, etc. And in different parts of the country, too. At first, I thought he was lying. Then I thought he was running from something. But in the end, I envied him. We only get one life, so why spend it working toward a singular goal, no matter how grand? Why not reinvent yourself? Who wouldn’t jump on the chance to be reborn? And that idea stuck with me in a subtle way until I ran across it again in my Bible reading about a year ago. The year of Jubilee, it’s called. A year in which all debts are forgiven, all land is returned to its original owners, and everyone starts anew. Once every seven years. And do you know what’s a multiple of seven? Thirty five, which is exactly what I was going to be turning the next year. And not a moment too soon. You see, my life has been a series of seven-year “ages” in which I’ve grown and found new exciting experiences, but at the end of each age, I become anxious, bogged down with mundane frustration until I finally burst through into some new adventure. And like any good adventure, mine started with the First Age…

The First Age: Ignorance (0-7)

The first seven years of my life are my mobile home memories. A little trailer home on Dorlac Road. Avoiding cactuses in our dirt basketball court. Digging through overgrown lily pads and cattails to get to our fishing hole. Going to daycare with the lady who played the piano and the man who threw a fake duck to his Golden Retriever. And family. So much family. The four of us boys crammed onto the broke-down couch and drawing funny faces on TV Guide pictures. Mom cooking a four-pound meatloaf to feed us. Watching my older brothers play Zelda and Punch Out and Techmo Superbowl. Going fishing at the Mississippi river with Grandpa Winch. Watching baseball with Grandpa Collins. Playing Ninja Turtles and Dungeons & Dragons with my cousins. Being mad when everyone went to Grandma’s and had chicken pox, but I wasn’t allowed to go and have any for some reason. You see, Grandma was the BEST cook, and I was SURE Chicken Pox were delicious. Because at that time, I didn’t understand it. Any of it. All lights and colors and awe-inspiring mystery. But when I turned eight, my parents began taking us to this other place. A spot in the woods. And we started cutting down those woods, clearing a space big enough for a castle. And men came out and blew up the ground, making a big hole. Walls went up. So many walls. And then mom said I had to start going to school. Away from my family. Away from everything I knew. But there was one thing I knew then: Fear.

The Second Age: Innocence (7-14)

I remember my first night in the new house. How could anyone keep from getting lost in such a place. It was so dark, quiet, and cavernous. I got a cat soon after that, and he felt the same way. Skittish, hidden, afraid. I named him Kitty. Kitty was my first real pet, and he was one of my closest friends through that Second Age. But slowly, something started to happen within me. I started to realize that the new house wasn’t scary. The new house was warm, solid, enduring, safe. Even the woods around us were peaceful and inviting. Our pond didn’t have any lily pads or cattails. But it did have catfish. Huge ones. And they bit best at night on doughballs. The deepest parts of the woods had caves and bluffs and creeks. And I could wander as long as I wanted without a watch or a compass, and somehow I’d always end up back at home just before dark.

School wasn’t so bad, either. I was nice to the kids, and they were nice back. I even made some friends who lived within bike-riding distance. I think Greg and Zach were the first. They were older, but they lived on the same gravel road. And they liked cards. Not the boring ones that my brothers liked—the ones about sports. No, these new cards had superheroes on them. And some of them were games that let you BE a superhero and fight against your friends’ superheroes. They brought my Saturday morning cartoons to life, and my love for fantasy and imagination started to blossom. I met Brandon next. He was a new kid on the bus, and he had a cool toy. He became my best friend for many years. Together we explored the wilderness, conquered the FIRST Warcraft game, and discovered girls. And as I approached the end of the Second Age, a dark, hormonal shadow spread over my life of innocence.

The Third Age: Independence (14-25)

Middle school. I shouldn’t have to explain further, but I will. My friends grew armpit hair, and I didn’t. My friends made the basketball team, and I didn’t. My friends paired up with girlfriends, and I didn’t (except that one time when Elizabeth Stroble let me cut in the lunch line by her). I found purpose in football, and I found God at Bates Creek church camp. A girl said she liked me in high school, so I started dating her. Then she cheated on me with my previously-mentioned best friend. It was then, at the peak of puberty’s angst, that I first felt heartbreak. I forgave them both and remained friends with them. I then met some more lifelong friends of the most interesting kind—skaters. There was something about them that I identified with. Not the skating (I lived on a gravel road, remember?). But they were honest, raw, adventurous, unafraid. A little broken, but also honest and loyal. And they all had the best senses of humor. I was friendly toward everyone in high school (even nominated for “most congenial”), but it was with those skaters that I learned to really push the boundaries of my reality.

This epic Age, extending through college to a couple years beyond, was the most adventurous and transformative of my life. There’s so much to tell. My first drink of alcohol (a “hey, mister” bottle of Jack Daniels in the back of my friend’s van). Wild parties that ALWAYS ended with deep conversations. Cruising the strip in my red 1995 Camaro. A heart-wrenching breakup with my second girlfriend, which left both mental and physical scars. Finding true peace in my empty college bedroom with a cup of tea, a candle, and my first copy of The Fellowship of the Ring. And then finding my love of reading, writing, and LEARNING. Education was a concept that had been forced down my throat throughout school, so I never realized I actually LOVED learning new things until it became an option. But it wasn’t long into my college career when I started devouring philosophy, history, religion, and fantasy of all kinds. And then I met my future wife in a bowling alley, and everything changed. She wasn’t from my hometown. She didn’t know any of my family or my childhood friends. She had no interest in fantasy books or emo music. She was an enigma and an emotional mess. And she was perfect. From that point on, I plowed through the middle of the Third Age. My future wife graduated from college, I graduated the following year, and that summer, I passed my Boards, married the love of my life, went on my first vacation outside of the country (a blissful honeymoon to Cancun), and moved from Missouri to Virginia Beach to start my first “adult” job as a physical therapist. And just like that, I found myself sitting on a beach next to my wife, 1,000 miles from home.

It’s odd that it would take getting married to feel true independence. But college was just an evolution of high school. And in Virginia, the only person I knew was my wife, and I barely knew her. So as you can imagine, the next couple of years were hard. I had no big brothers or parents to show me how things were done. No friends to vent to. No familiar pets or woods to feel perfectly at home. No, this was an entirely new adventure for my new wife and me. We fought, we cried, we kissed, we fought some more, and we didn’t think we were going to make it. And then, one night after my shift at Busch Gardens Howl-o-Scream (yes, I moonlighted as a 6’5” axe-wielding zombie), I received a call. Well several calls, actually. And all of them said I needed to call home. Dad had been in a car accident. He was dead.

The next year was a blur. The darkest of my life. Gray. That’s all I remember. Grayness, confusion, doubt, hopelessness. I felt overworked and underqualified at a miserable job surrounded by immaturity, manipulation, and spite. I let the unresolved depression from losing my father destroy my relationship with my wife. And finally, at my wits end, I dragged said wife back home to Farmington (not my WIFE’s home, mind you. And that fact plagued our relationship for many years). Thus ended our time at Virginia Beach and the longest Age of my life.

The Fourth Age: Interlude (25-28?)

If the Third was the longest age, the Fourth was the shortest. From twenty-five to twenty-eight, in the wake of tragedy and what felt like betrayal, I slipped back into the comfort of things I knew. I found healing in writing—transforming memories and ideas into worlds and adventures that couldn’t harm me the way the real world had—and I was actually good at it! I also started work at my hometown clinic with my physical therapy mentor, which meant I was suddenly surrounded by people who knew everything about me. They UNDERSTOOD me. They comforted and uplifted me. For that I am forever grateful. But my dependance on the past also nearly broke the bond my wife and I had begun to forge in Virginia. She was jealous that I was home. I was jealous that she still had both parents. But slowly, after a lot of tears and a few broken pieces of furniture, we found each other again. There was no single epiphanous moment, but the defining word between us was commitment. Commitment to God and commitment to each other. Life started regaining some of its color, and I started trusting again. And then, after coming home from a hunting trip with my brothers one weekend, my wife told me she was pregnant.

The Fifth Age: Inquisition (28-35)

Gosh, what a whirlwind. My daughters’ stories are written in detail on this blog, so I won’t rehash them, but talk about nonstop adventure! In some ways, this has been the best Age of my life, but as I neared its end, the horizon again grew dark.

You see, through earlier tragedy and hardship, I had developed an, “If it is to be, it’s up to me,” mentality. Mostly because there were some unfortunate things that I couldn’t control but there were so many that I could. And it seemed like anything I really set my mind to was attainable. I’d landed my dream job. I’d also written novels, and those novels were getting closer and closer to publication. But slowly, my dream job became a monotonous chore, and my fledgling writing career started hitting one dead end after another. To the point where my literary agent finally broke ties, and after writing five novels, I didn’t have the strength to write another one. And tragically, I let those facts define me.

Of course, it’s such a tragedy because I was finally living a fruitful life with my wife and two super girls! On top of that, I’d become a freemason and met more lifelong friends, and toward the end of the Age, I’d embarked on a nearly year-long introspective journey with five other Christian men. But none of that mattered because I didn’t know who I was. I’d failed at writing, my “day job” became a drain on my spirit, and no matter how much I tried, there didn’t seem to be an end in sight.

And here we are. On the cusp of a new age. Last week, I finished my last meeting with those five amazing Christian men, and they have saved me. Truly. Well, they have helped me back to God’s purpose in my life: Achieving Adventure. Before that, I was dying inside, and I didn’t know why. I HAD to achieve something. ANYTHING (as if a wife, kids, and a successful career weren’t enough). But the ruts were so deep that finding a new path felt impossible. Too late in the game. Another has-been who had come so close but ultimately wasted all of his God-given potential. Talk about a classic mid-life crisis. And then came those 6 a.m. meetings. The conversations will likely fade into distant memory, but the effects will stay with me forever. Those men helped me realize what I’ve been chasing my whole life: adventure, exploration, the unknown. I LOVE learning, remember? I love growing. Not achieving, just growing. And the energy that burst from that realization has pushed me out of my ruts. It’s renewed my passion for physical therapy to the point where I’ve landed a promotion that promises new adventures. And my passion for writing, though still not quite renewed, is starting to flicker in my soul again. I have my strongest manuscript back in my hands, professionally edited and full of potential. Even if it’s never published, I will soon dive back into that adventure of my own creation. And that’s not all.

Next week I will attend my final meeting as Master of Farmington Masonic Lodge #132, and I will thank those Freemason brothers for an amazing five-year adventure that I will forever be grateful for. On that same day, I will celebrate the ribbon cutting of a new physical therapy clinic, and I will act as it’s clinic coordinator. Soon, my family and I will move to a new home—a place with explorable woods and a blank canvas of possibility.

The Sixth Age: Untitled

I have no clue what this Sixty Age will bring. I don’t know how many more Ages I’ll get to experience after that. But as I write this, I find myself smiling. The mystery fuels me, and my anxiety finally feels more like excitement again. I’m on a new adventure, and I get to take it with my three best friends: my wife is more of a trusted and true co-pilot than ever, my nearly four-year-old is in the midst of her blissful Age of Ignorance, and my seven-year-old is on the cusp of her own Second Age! What a time to be alive.

I’m about to enter the Sixth Age, friends. Another chapter of my life. And I can’t wait to share the adventure with you.

[theopennotebook]

Skins FanFic

Chapter 6: Hit the Road Jack

Cook and I kept hooking up for a few weeks after the night we all went out, many hot and heavy make-out sessions but never going all the way. But things cooled down pretty quickly and we realized that though we had a great time together, we didn’t want to pursue anything else romantic, we much preferred just enjoying each other’s company as friends. Sure, we had a connection. But I was me and he was… well… Cook. I would always be a bit of a princess, and he would always be brash and crude and abrasive and… well, Cook. He was a lot of fun, but not the kind of guy you introduced to your mom. Plus, he was Freddie’s best friend. And I couldn’t stand being around Freddie.

Seeing Freddie at school over the next few weeks was beyond uncomfortable.  At first, Freddie would try to talk to me in the hallways, to which I only ever responded with icy silence. I still couldn’t believe that I had started to fall for such a disgusting human being. It was probably just the drugs distorting my perception. Yet, I still found myself being drawn to him. What was wrong with me?

I was lost in my thoughts at the end of the school day, still in my own little world as I walked home. I barely said a word to my family that evening, I just went through the motions of dinner and homework before heading up to my room to read. What a way to spend a Friday evening.

About an hour after passing out with a book in my hands, I was awoken by the sound of my buzzing cellphone

 FR: Maxxieeeeeee

Friday 5:30pm

Pack a bag, we’re going to the cabin for the weekend.

 I rubbed my eyes, attempting to orient myself. Afternoon naps always left me groggy.

 TO: Maxxieeeeeee

Friday 5:31pm

What?

 FR: Maxxieeeeeee

Friday 5:31pm

Jack and Finn’s cabin. Hurry. Jack will be at your place in 20.

 TO: Maxxieeeeeee

Friday 5:32pm

Maxxie, I’m already in my “not leaving the house again” clothes. And what am I supposed to tell my parents?

 FR: Maxxieeeeeee

Friday 5:33pm

Not my problem. Stop being such a grandma. Figure something out. 17 minutes. See you soon.

 I tossed my phone down on my bed, put my bookmark back in Pride and Prejudice and found myself absentmindedly beginning to pack a weekend bag. I tossed in the essentials and even dug out the bag of skittles that were left over from the night we went clubbing. They may come in handy. I slunk downstairs to find my dad sitting in the living room, watching the news.  

“Hey, dad?”

“Yes pumpkin?”

“Maxxie and some of our friends are headed to a cabin for the weekend. Can I go?”

“Where is this cabin?” He asked, pulling himself away from a story of a skateboarding dog.

“Not sure, I’ll text you the address. Dad, they’re on their way here… I need an answer.”

“It’s getting late. How are you evening planning on getting there?”

“Jack is coming to pick me up.”

“That’s one of the twins, right?”

“Yes.”

“He seems respectable enough. Alright, have a good weekend. Say hi to Maxine for me. When will you be back?”

“Probably Sunday. Thanks, dad!” I said, placing a kiss on his cheek. I ran out of the living room before he could ask any more questions.

At 5:50pm, I saw Jack’s familiar SUV pull up outside of my house. I grabbed my backpack, camping gear and the bag of snacks I had thrown together and slipped out of the house. Jack sat in the driver’s seat, the back-seat empty. Jack hopped out to help me toss my stuff in the trunk.

“Where is everybody?” I asked.

“Don’t worry, I’m not kidnapping you. You’re just the first one on my pick-up list.” He said flashing a debonair smile.

“Where’re Finn and Maxxie?” I asked, climbing into the passenger seat.

“Maxxie is driving herself and Finn took our other car. We wouldn’t all fit in one car.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t sound so disappointed to be alone with me.” Jack teased, starting the car.

I stuck my tongue out at him playfully.

“I’m trembling in my seat.” He teased.

I smiled back at him. The skin around his eyes crinkled when he laughed, and his green eyes glinted in the sunlight.

“What?” He asked, taking a few stray locks of my hair in between his fingers. 

“Nothing…” Still smiling, I turned to stare out of the window instead.

After a few moments of silence, I remembered what Cook had told me about Jack. I wasn’t sure when I was ever going to get him alone again, so I decided that this would be the best time to clear the air.

“I know what happened between you and Cook’s girlfriend, Jack…”

“What?” He took his eyes off the road for only a second, but his face flushed. “What are you talking about?”

“Cook told me,” I said, not taking my eyes off of him. I studied his response. I saw the muscles around his jaw tense and release. He let out a long exhale.

“Okay.” He signaled and pulled into a gas station parking lot.

He turned off the engine.

“I had been hoping to avoid having this conversation with you, but if it has to happen, I want to make sure to give you my full attention.”

“I’m listening.”

“Okay. Me, Finn, and Cook were really close. The three of us had been friends since primary school. Cook’s mum was and Finn and my piano teacher as a kid. We ended up spending more time playing with her son than practicing the piano. The three of us were inseparable. Then about two years ago, Cook met Eden and they started dating. I’d seen Cook with a lot of girls, but this was the first time I saw him do the whole ‘boyfriend’ thing. He dove in head first, like he would have given her his left kidney if she had asked him to. But we could all tell that she wasn’t as invested as he was. She was a lot like Effie - very free-spirited, rebellious - except Eden had a mean streak and a penchant for vodka and pills. She would use Cook for his money and then blame him for her shortcomings.” Jack looked over at me to make sure I was still following.

“Anyway, after two months or so they started fighting like cats and dogs. At first, it was just playful bickering, but by the 8-month mark, we all thought they may actually kill each other. We all told Cook to end it with her, for his own sanity. One day, Eden shows up at my apartment while Finn was at work. She was a mess, she had clearly been on a bender. I let her in and asked her what was wrong. She told me that she and Cook had gotten into their biggest fight yet and that it was over between them. She had been staying at his place at the time because she and her mum didn’t get on well, mostly because of Eden’s rage and the substance abuse. I invited her in to collect herself. She went into my room, said she needed a nap. I went into the kitchen to make her something to eat.” He paused and wiped his hands over his face. I could see him growing more anxious.

“Jack… what happened next?”

He looked at me, his eyes begging me not to make him go on. But I needed to know, I needed to hear it from him.

He exhaled. “When I went back into my room, Eden was lying on my bed… naked… I was in shock. I just stood there in the doorway holding a grilled cheese like a pansy. She slowly made her way over to me. I asked her what she was doing, and she backed me up against the doorframe. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to touch her… I knew I couldn’t. But then she undid my pants and began to pull them down… I… I…” He let his head fall into his hands.

“Did you sleep with her?” I interjected.

“No! Is that what Cook told you?!” He looked horrified by my accusation. “The only thing that happened is that she tried to give me head and I pushed her off! She was embarrassed so I tried to downplay the situation. I gave her a shirt to put on and went back to the kitchen. Eden was a bit messed up, you know? I didn’t want to set her off.  Anyway, I heard the buzzer ring, but before I could answer it, Eden ran to the door. I heard Cook explode and ran out to try to diffuse the situation, which of course only made it worse. He accused me of sleeping with her, which I adamantly denied. Eden didn’t say anything, she just stood in the corner of the hallway smirking like she had planned it all along. Ever since then, he’s wanted me dead. But I swear to you, I didn’t do anything with Eden. I wouldn’t do that. Especially not to Cook. He was like another brother to me. Zye, I swear to you. That’s what happened.”

 I searched his face for any sign that he may be lying, but everything he said seemed sincere. His eyes were wrought with grief, I had clearly hit a nerve.

“Did you ever try to reach out to Cook? Tell him what happened?”

“Every day for 6 months. By the end, he told me that if I ever spoke to him again, he would jam his fist so far down my throat that he’d pull my balls out through my mouth… I took that as a hint to leave him alone.”

A heavy silence fell over the car.

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding me, Zye?”

I shifted in my seat uncomfortably. “Well…”

“I mean… I get it… if I heard that about someone, I wouldn’t want to hang around them either.”

“I’m sorry Jack…” I placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Are we alright now though? You don’t think I’m some low life woman stealer? Am I back to being the ridiculously good-looking guy you know and love?”

“We’re fine now Jack.” I smiled sincerely. I felt as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Between finding out that Jack stole Cook’s girlfriend and that Freddie was such a creep, I didn’t know how much more I could handle.

Jack nodded and started the car.

“Hey, Jack?”

“Yes?”

“Whatever happened to Eden?”

“I went to her house a few days after things blew up with Cook to try to get her to explain to him what had happened. Her mom answered the door saying that Eden had transferred to an all-girls boarding school four hours away. She seemed surprised that I didn’t know, apparently, they had been planning it for months. She hadn’t even bothered to tell any of us she was leaving. I wouldn’t be surprised if she planned the whole mess as a means of leaving her mark on us. Typical Eden.”

I noticed his hand lingering on the gear shift. I placed mine over his.

“I’m sorry about you and Cook. I’ll see if there’s any way I can help.”

He smiled warmly at me. “Thank you.”

Before long we had picked up Cook and Effie. Initially, I felt uneasy around Effie. After all, she had seen me almost kiss her sort-of boyfriend. If she and Cook were anything alike, it meant she may be holding a grudge against me. But, to my surprise, she and I fell into easy and comfortable conversation and before I knew it we were on our way to the cabin.

---

When they said we were coming to a “cabin”, I pictured a homely wooden structure, hidden amongst the trees. What I saw in front of me as we drove up was a sprawling, modern, angular structure nestled into the rolling hills of the countryside. As we drove around the side into the driveway, I had a full view of the dock and the lake just as the sun was setting over it. I jumped out of the car as it stopped to take it all in. It was absolutely breathtaking.

“Earth to Zye!” I heard Jack call from the porch.

I snapped out of my reverie and turned to help Cook and Effie empty the trunk.

Jack showed me to the room I’d be sharing with Maxxie.

“Will you be okay in here?” He asked, leaning against the doorframe.

“I think it will do quite nicely!” I said flinging myself dramatically onto the best nearest the bay window. Jack rested my things on the floor beside the bed and helped me up.

Jack headed down the hall to his own room while I began to make my way downstairs.

I ran down the stairs so quickly that my socks slipped on the hardwood floor. I felt myself beginning to fall and then being grabbed out of midair. I felt strong hands grab my waist and set me back on solid ground. It was Freddie.

“Are you alright?” He asked gently as I turned to face him, his hands still around my waist, his eyes with a glint of playfulness in them.

A sudden memory of his body pressed against mine in the dark, humid club flashing through my mind. As I stood only inches away from him, I felt the same burning desire in the pit of my stomach that I felt before. My hand traced its way up his arm again my better judgement. I shook away the memory and commanded my mind back to the present.

“I’m glad I bumped into you actually, Zye. I’ve been meaning to talk to you…”

“Thank you for catching me. I have to go.” I said curtly, pulling myself from his hands.

“Oh, right. Of course.” He said, awkwardly running his hands through his hair. Oh, how I wanted to run my fingers through that hair, gripping it as he placed hungry kisses on my collarbone and nibbled on my earlobe… I shook away the thought.

“Just be careful, wouldn’t want you to fall.” He said with a faint smile.

I turned and ran down the rest of the stairs, this time being sure to hold the railing. I walked into the living room where Cook was tending to the roaring fire. Looks like I would be going 2 for 2 today. This was just the opportunity I needed to try to get him to make up with Jack and I wasn’t going to waste it.

[worldsupermoms]

World Super Mom Tributes

World Super Mom Carol Florida US

As clinically defined by Merriam-Webster and for this story, “mother” is essentially “a female parent”. As anyone who has had a mother or has been one, the act of being a mother is so much more and I feel cannot be properly defined. I have had the good fortune of not just having one mother, but three. This story is about one of those women who didn’t have to be a mother to a precocious eight-year-old but found it in her heart to do so.

My first memory of the woman who would be “Mother” someday was as a five-year-old child. My father was good friends with Professor Renne who was then married to Mom. We were visiting so that I could play with her other two children Claire, who was about 7 months older than me, and Rachel, who was about 2 years my Jr. That night after the other children had gone to bed, my father put me out in the car to sleep. Now mind you where they lived was out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by 40 acres of nothing but trees and wild creatures who sounds were unfamiliar to a child who was raised in the suburbs. I was terrified. Mom heard me crying from inside the house and came to check on me. She wasn’t even my mother then but cared for me like I was her own that night, singing to me and keeping me company until my father was ready to leave.

A couple of years went by and when I was 8 I found out that my father was going to be taking over the parental responsibility from my Grandparents. I was packed into my father’s van with everything I owned and taken to meet my new family. As we drove up the long driveway I started to recognize where we were going and looked up at my father who told me my new family was going to be the woman who had cared for me all of those years ago and her daughters, Rachel and Claire, who were going to be my new sisters. As we got out of the van my new sisters came racing out of the house yelling and laughing and welcomed me with open arms. After the ecstatic welcome party, my new mother came up to me, crouched down and looked me in the eye and told me she knew that she would never be able to replace my grandmother in my heart, but that she wanted to do her best to be that undefinable mother to me.

This would be the beginning of the next eight years of my life and having the mother that I always wished I could have. She didn’t treat me any different than my sisters and unless you knew the family well before I came into it, no one knew that I wasn’t her flesh and blood. She took me in and raised me as her own, cared for me and comforted me and raised me to be the woman that I am today. Even to this day, 19 years after her and my father divorced, she is still “Mom” and now Grandma to my daughter. If I can be half of what she was to me, then I would be the best Mom in the world.

Thank you, Carol, you will forever be my Mom; that undefinable title that only few can truly embody.

— A. Barsic

World Super Mom Nercy Santander Columbia

My mom’s name is Nercy, she was born in Colombia in a small town called Santander. She means the world to me. There isn’t anything that I would not do for her. Especially to make sure that she is okay and has everything she wants.

Even though we may not always agree on everything, I can’t stand the fact of being mad at her. Even if we get into a fight or an argument, I still feel bad. I feel like its my fault. I call my mom a porcelain doll, because even though she is one of the strongest and toughest person I know, on the inside, she is fragile. She can easily be broken given the situation. My mom speaks her mind and is one of the bluntest people but yet she is very caring. She always cares for her family. I remember growing up. She would come home from work and make dinner. She would iron my school uniform for the next day. She would wake me at up 5 am, get me ready for school, made me breakfast and got me on the bus.

Most of her family is in Colombia. Thanks to her sisters, my Grandma, and my cousin my mom has been able to regain her strength and find her way back since we lost my dad. I know it’s hard for her, at times. Especially during a holiday or anniversary. But she knows that she has a family and two kids that will always be there.

While in Colombia, my mom studied hotel management & beverages, and teaching. She has compassion for kids and the elderly also. When we moved to Florida, she stared working at a retirement home and was there for 11yrs. I also worked there with her. All of the residents loved her. She was the one that made sure the dining room was running smoothly and the residents were getting everything they needed and wanted. I was in charge of the dining room. The one person that I could never boss around was my mom simply because she did her job so well. Whenever they residents had the chance they would tell me how Nercy was the best employee in the dining area. They would tell me that they looked forward to dinner time during the week because they knew they would get the best service from her. They would always say how hard she worked.

I don’t think I have enough stories or words to explain how much I love my mom and what she means to me. She is my world. I would rather stay home on a weekend night and spend it with her watching movies than go out. Many people don’t understand why I do this. My answer is simple. I only have one mom in this world and I don’t know how long I have her for. So, I am going to enjoy every moment that I can with her.

— Luisa

World Super Mom Ethel Henderson Florida US

I love my mom more than life itself. Being a mother has to be one of the hardest jobs in the entire world. No one can ever come close or measure up to my mom. Ever since me, my brothers, and sisters were young we didn’t have a father to call our own. My mom was there to take over both roles. We were very poor back then. My mom did everything to make sure we always had clothes on our back, food on the table, and that we stayed in school. Our mom worked two jobs to make ends meet. She would leave the house early in the morning and come home late at night. My mom would sometimes be so tired that she could hardly stand up. Oh, what a mom we had. She never complained. She would always be very loving towards us. We were a family of five children.

The greatest thing that I love about my mom is that she never treated any of us differently. If she didn’t have enough candy for each of us when she came home from work than she would not hand out any. Not to any of us.

I love my mom. She is the very best thing that ever happened to me in my life.  

Sometimes when my mom came home from work she would sit down in her chair. I would take her shoes off. At the same time, my sisters would brush her hair. She would fall asleep in the most beautiful and compassionate way. We were so lucky to have my mom.

When we were sad she always knew the right thing to say to make things better. I can’t tell you how many times we had to pack up our things and move. Just trying to keep a roof over our heads. We had a very rough life but my mom hung in there. She kept us all together. Her love for us was unconditional. We never questioned her love for us.

I used to think that my mom was God because she always seemed to make everything all right. I truly know what a mother’s love is.

— Frank Smith  

World Super Mom Janie West Virginia US

My mom’s name was Janie. She passed away on March 21, 2011. I always knew she was special but what none of us realized was that she was our family glue.

She meant everything to her thirteen (13) children. All of us are grown adults now. She would be the one who told us the news about each of the other. Each and every kid. Her home was our center point. It is where we came together as a family.

Growing up, my mom was everyone’s Mom.

My mom’s profession was working as a bus driver. She would make sure that every child on her bus knew she loved them. She was a huge garage sale person and she was always on the look out for special trinkets to gift to her students. If she didn’t have a trinket she always had a huge bright smile and some mints in her pocket.

When my mom passed away she took breath and life away. I miss her so much every day.

–C. C. Simpson-Squyres

World Super Moms

My Two World Super Moms Eunice Harper and Arlene Andrews Pennsylvania and South Carolina US

I being a child of the fifties was born in a simpler time, and the two lovely women that are the basis of my tribute were actually friends to one another. Eunice Harper and Arlene Andrews both Military wives. Times being what they were, Eunice my Biological mother already had 5 children at home and was struggling, and Arlene could not bear children so, I became a sacrifice that one woman made to the other, which was the answer to the other woman prayers.

My biological mother knew she was giving me a better life with more opportunities and I would still have the chance to know my family and my siblings. (Adoptions in the fifties were set up differently, between friends)…… That being said this was something that would only be done out of love.

My life moving forward, I was the center of everything, and my new mother would devote everything to making sure I stayed involved with ballet, piano lessons, she even became the troop leader of my Brownie troop and Girl Scout troop…..

She was always there every time I needed to have someone to talk to or someone to just listen… There is no greater love than a love between a mother and her child…and that being said also means sacrifice……..Because sometime TRUE love means sacrifice.

I will always be thankful for, and love both my Mothers and everything they did for me, because without them, I would not have had my life and appreciation for it, that I have today.

–Patty Andrews

World Super Mom Derondha Florida US

My mom’s name is Derondha Lee. She is in her fabulous 40s and looks amazing I might add. My mother is more than a World Super Mom. She is a true angel sent from God that my two brothers and I are more than blessed to have. My mother went through the trials and tribulations of being a single mother before she got married, and I promise I believe it made her the woman that she is.

My mother is the center of the family. She is the shoulder to lean on, the listening ear, the rescuer in emergencies, the messenger among the siblings, and most importantly, the foundation. My mother taught my siblings and I very young about independence and pushed us to be the very best that we could be. Her discipline helped mold us into the accomplished adults we are today. My mom work’s as a law enforcement dispatcher so she is very in tune with real life. It is because of this, growing up she was very protective over my brothers and I, but as we grew up, we understood why. My mother always always puts her family and children first, while often putting herself on the back burner. It was very apparent that we were all that mattered.

As I became an adult and a mother myself, I often reminisce on my childhood and ask myself, “What would my mother do?” I can only continue to strive to be half the woman that my mother is. I am blessed to still have her and so is my daughter. Her guidance and support on every level is more than one could ever fathom. My mother is a true inspiration to many, even those who are not her children and I just pray that she knows her hard work and dedication is not in vain.

If I could make one wish, it would definitely be to give my mother the world because she more than deserves it. If I can’t do that, then I just want to take care of her and provide for her so that she never has to work another day, yet alone overtime, because it’s time she gets to enjoy her life as she has completed her task of raising my brothers and I into successful adults. I love you World Super Mom!

–—Brittany Parnell

* From A World Super Mom’s Perspective   *

Hello, my name is Brittany Parnell. I had my daughter at the age of 21, married at 23, received my college degree at 24/25, and divorced my child’s father at 26 who also passed away a couple months later. On top of all that I quit my government job working for my local Sheriff’s Office back home at the age of 27, just to relocate to South Florida to pursue a dream and career in modeling all while starting my own business. Crazy, yeah, I know. But here I am today. I made it. I’m not quite where I’d like to be, there are obstacles every day, but I’m taking one step at a time and I am not giving up. Luckily growing up, my mother taught me great values as a woman and as a mother. She taught me to never depend on anyone, that I could do anything I set my mind to, and that anything is possible with hard work, just to name a few. So with one Super Mom leading and teaching me, failing was not an option. Plus you only fail when you don’t try, right?Having my daughter at young age was a blessing in my eyes. She became my purpose and pushed me in ways I never thought possible. My daughter is my best friend and every decision I make in life is for her. Unfortunately, her father became terminally ill and I became his caretaker right before we got married. Being with someone who is ill is not easy and there are many emotions that swirl around the household, along with other issues such as finances. After trying to work through the differences, which I believe were created his illness and him feeling primarily feeling like less of a man, we decided it was best to end our marriage. A few months later, he succumbed to his illness, leaving me to be a single mother to my then five-year- old daughter.Being a single mother is not easy. You really have to work for the title of mother. There are no days o:. No other parent to call for help. You become mommy and daddy. A little person is depending on you and you are all they have to survive. Granted, yes I do have support from family, but they are hundreds of miles away and it’s only so much that a phone call can do. Every day, I think about what I can do to make my life better in order to make my daughter’s life better because I know she is looking up to me and counting on me.At the end of 2017, I made the decision to leave my job of almost 5 years working for law enforcement and walk by faith. I moved to South Florida in hopes of developing as a model and building my career. I also started my own Entertainment/Event Planning business. I felt accomplished. Income from my business is not steady, but I’m surviving. I’m still pushing and working to develop it even more, along with my modeling. Anything worth having won’t come easy and being an entrepreneur will definitely teach you that.Here I am today. A 28-year-old single mother, building a business, and building a new relationship with someone who has been there for me through some of my hardest times. Life isn’t easy. Being a mother isn’t easy. But, at the end of the day, God chose me to fight this battle. He placed me in positions to make me stronger and wiser, and an overall better person so that I could fulfill my purpose of being a mother to my daughter. With all of the obstacles I’ve had to overcome in just the last 7 years of my life, there is no doubt about it. I am a Super Mom, and you are too. No matter what you may be going through, no matter how bad the storm may seem, it will not last forever. You too can and will overcome anything that comes your way. Just think about your child or children and remember they are depending on you. As long as you are making progress, that is all that matters. Some progress is better than no progress and no matter what you do, just never give up. If I can do it, you can too World Super Mom!

—Brittany Parnell

* From A World Super Mom’s Perspective   *

As a single mother of two my life has been challenging. At the age of 20 I found out that I was pregnant with my son Cameron. At this time I was working two jobs and going to school. I decide to stop going to school because I needed to support both me and my son. I went from job to job to job and said that I’m going back to school. Well God had other plans in stored for me. I ended up moving to Alabama and found out that I was pregnant with my second child. I moved out of state from where my daughter’s father lived. At that time I was like omg, I am 27 with no job I gave up everything to move to AL with my parents. I felt embarrassed because I did not finish school and I had no job to support my two kids. Then, I ended up finding a job at Publix at six months pregnant. It was a great start and a new beginning. I was going to sign up for school at Tuskegee University but then my dad got a job offer back home in Florida. We ended up moving back home and I was just working until I got on my feet. I returned to Florida in 2016 and worked my butt off and now I’m 31 it’s 2019. I own my own spa business and will be graduating from Miami Dade College this year. I completed a specialist program from a beauty school as well. I did all this being a single mother. No one said it will be an easy journey but determination is the key. No matter how hard life gets or what obstacles you come across push through it you will accomplish anything you put your mind too. I did it with two kids with no support I know you can accomplish your goals too. Stay focused, cut off any distractions, stay determined, walk with your head up, take pride in everything that you do. “Your last name will be your legacy ”

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Send a 200-500 word message from a world super moms perspective.

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[heatofthemomentfanfic]

Chapter Forty Nine

I dropped off Ezi with Sandi. They missed each other. Aubrey was still away in LA with his girlfriend. I feel like he forgets what he has. It's only when he comes home, his mind is clear. By home, I mean Toronto.

My keys stayed with the valet service. Heading straight to the elevator. No scene needed. Checking the time silently. Exhaling as the numbers changed. Old memories slowed flowed to my conscious. All of them because of Aubrey. Three years marked so much memories.

Knocking on the hotel door. The hallway quiet and empty. A smile on my lips as I met with Odell's eyes. Stepping in quickly before any commotion.

Following him to see what he did before I arrived. Sitting watching ESPN. His hoodie covered his blonde curls. He seemed tired. Pulling me into his lap. Kissing the side of my face while his hands wrapped around me.

“I miss you.” His words were deeply sincere.

My fingers combed his beard. “I miss you more. Are you alone?”

“Yeah. I didn't need distractions from my boys. I just needed to be with you. Long distance is hard--”

“Your compromise doesn't do unnoticed. I appreciate this visit.” Staring at his beautiful features. His eyes slowly met mine. Giving me a serious look before breaking into the infamous smile.

“I know it's hard for you to juggle between being a mom, lawyer and girlfriend. Plus, this is off-season...and I couldn't do this during the season.”

We shared a laugh. “I would be coming to you. Are you hungry?”

He chuckled. “You're such a foodie.”

A gentle smile. “You knew this. I'm taking that as a no.”

He kissed my cheek. “Not yet.” He watched me get comfortable beside him. “You're about to sleep? You just got here.”

“Can I for like twenty minutes? I didn't sleep last night from work and Ezi wasn't feeling good.” My eyes shut. I needed this nap.

He didn't argue with me. He did let me sleep over twenty minutes. A good forty five minute nap with no interruptions.

“Wake up baby.” He pecked my lips softly repeatedly. My eyes opened to see his bright eyes. I wasn't on the couch but in his bed. “You were snoring.”

I laughed as I slowly got up. Stretching after feeling rested. “I told you I was tired--”

“Tired?! You were snoring like a man.” He chuckled. “Nah but I didn't want you to sleep too much. Your phone was going off with calls and texts. Plus, I'm hungry.” He gave me puppy eyes.

“We can have whatever you want.” Extending my arms open for him. Wanting a hug that turned into my legs being wrapped around his waist and being carried back to the living room.

“I want a good meal and then you for dessert.” He held me in his arms. Odell was serious.

My fingers played in his hair. I tilted my head while my eyes were on his lips. “I don't know if we can do dessert tonight. I'll be a little bloated.”

“I'll have a sweet snack before dinner. I can finish both. I can show you if you don't believe me.” His fingers inched towards my butt.

I smiled. I slid off of him to check my phone. “I need to make sure things are good.”

Status checks from Sandi. All was well with both of them. Ezi fell asleep for the night. I didn't need to get her until tomorrow afternoon. I was free for the night.

Maya needed me to fly to New York to do dress fittings. Her wedding was next month. I still had to plan with her best friend and throw an amazing bachelorette party.

Janai was Maya's best friend. Texting about ideas she had. Slipping away while I was in New York to plan for Maya.

My friends wanted to hang out. Take a trip to Miami just to enjoy the beach and good food. A little weekend getaway.

My siblings wanted to hang out this weekend. Just us cooking and playing games. Good time to bond with all of us.

“Actually, we can just grab dinner. I know where your mind is.” A kiss on my neck. My attention fell back on him. Ready to leave.

“Sorry. It's just--”

“You're a busy woman. Everyone loves you.” His soft smile made me feel guilty. He just wanted time.

“Could you imagine me being famous?” A light joke that he shook his head to.

“I would have to be scheduled in.” He watched me get ready. “I would have to steal your time.”

I drove to Rosedale. He was craving their food the most. Sitting in a secluded area that gave a great view. Sharing deep conversations about our futures. He made me laugh. His personality lit up under dim lighting.

“This might sound a little crazy but…”

Odell’s eyes widened. “As long as I'm back for training, we're good.”

“Can you spend the night?” I was hesitant. My doors were opening up for him. That last and only person that has slept in my bed was Aubrey.

He took a sip of his drink. “Are you sure?”

A quiet nod. “I would rather us in my bed than a hotel bed. It was cozy but my bed is better.”

He smiled. “Let's go then.”

I dropped a good tip on the table. Moving past the busy crowd. Rosedale was doing good tonight. We bumped into Aubrey on the way out. He was back in town. Amanda by his side followed P. Reign, CJ, Future, Chubbs, and Mark.

A mere greeting as I passed. I was tired; it was all over my face. I made my way to the car; waiting on Odell. He walked up to the car. Pulling me out of the driver’s seat playfully.

“I got it from here.” A boyish smile that I gave into. Kissing my lips playfully. “I can navigate us.”

Sitting in the passenger seat was comfortable. I fell asleep for the ride. Waking up for the hotel stop and my home. I lead him upstairs to share a shower. My favorite part resting in his arms in my bed. Falling asleep as his fingers grazed my skin.

Kisses and the smell of bacon woke me up. An instant smile on my lips. My eyes opened slowly to see Odell serving me breakfast.

“Morning sleepy.” He sat on the edge of the bed.

“Morning.” Quickly rushing to freshen up and return to bed.

His smile was bright as he watched me. “I made your favorites...cheese eggs, pancakes and bacon with fruits on the side.”

I laughed at the small, odd pancakes. I saw his effort. “When did you learn how to cook?”

“I could always do a little something.”

“Thank you.” Pecking his lips. I slowly ate. “Where's your plate?”

“I couldn't wait on you.” He moved beside me. Turning on the tv. “I'm also leaving earlier than planned. I'm heading to Miami with my boys.”

“Okay.” I tried to be calm and nonchalant. My eyes fell on his unbothered expression. “Is this a joke or are you serious?”

“I'm serious. Are you okay?”

A small smile. “I'm fine, I promise. You leave tonight?”

“Yeah.” He kissed my shoulder. “I'll be back for two days with the boys and then I'm back home.”

A quiet nod as I ate. Sometimes, I would like to be with him. We don't spend enough time together.

“The kitchen is nicer than you said. I felt fancy as hell making breakfast.” He lightened the mood.

“I'm surprised you didn't wake me up to tell you where everything was.”

“I never said I wasn't a mess.” Stealing a strawberry from my plate.

He cleaned up for me. Forcing me to stay in bed. I decided to check in on my baby girl. She was having a blast with her grandma. Aubrey was on his way to see them. I concealed my annoyance; Amanda would be there.

Odell came back landing in my arms. He was a big kid at heart. Attacking me with kisses. My laughs filled the room.

“You're so heavy! Dell, I can't.” Struggling with the words between my laugh.  

“It's just muscle.” He began to tickle me for a few minutes. Going back to light kisses before holding me. “You got a little on you there.”

“I haven't worked out in forever...and I'm not gonna start with you because you're on another level.” My fingers played in his hair.

Laying in bed for hours was nice. I jumped into the shower only to be met with Odell. Sneaking in for sex that I didn't turn down. Getting dressed playfully before dropping him back at his hotel. We wasted enough time in which he had only an hour left to leave and check out.

I went home to clean up. Ezi was still at Sandi's house. She wasn't causing too much trouble. She was under her father's arms. Calling again around seven to see that they were in the studio.

Entering quietly as I heard a new song playing. It was still in progress. Ezi sat on 40’s lap focused on the soundboard. Aubrey was on his phone. Amanda was on the couch.

I walked over to greet 40. Squeezing his shoulders lightly. He was surprised to see me of course. Ezi reached for me. Taking her in my arms. Hugging and kissing her. Feeling eyes on me; it was Aubrey's.

“Wassup?” A genuine smile.

“Back in the studio, huh?” Kissing Ezi's cheek. Another pair of eyes stared at me; expecting me to speak. I didn't; a simple nod would be enough.

“Hi Zhuri.”

“We're getting her piano lessons.” Aubrey tickled Ezi’s stomach. “I think she's going to be an artist.”

“Sure.” Smiling at her. She was getting big on me. Her birthday was in a few months. She was going to be three. “She ate and everything?”

His look showed that I knew the answer. She would always be taken care of by him.

“Sorry. I'm not gonna stay. I have plans.” Putting Ezi down to grab her coat.

“Plans?” His eyebrow raised.

“Respect is the least of your worries.” My eyes fell on Ezi and Amanda. Hugging each other. Big smiles as her fingers brushed against Amanda's face. “Ezi, it's time to go.”

My tone was gentle to get her attention. Running back to me for her coat. Blowing her kisses to Amanda. Going to her Uncle 40 first then to her dad.

“She's good with her.” His voice was low.

“She has no other choice. Bye 40.” My eyes pierced his while changing the subject. I hugged 40 before taking Ezi.

“Do you ever plan on being nicer?”

“Things could be worse. Be grateful.” Walking past him. Glancing back to see his laugh.

Ezi and I went home to eat pizza and watch Disney movies for the night. Designing the living room into a sleepover for the two of us; falling asleep downstairs. Waking up to see my baby girl sleeping peacefully; I could see Aubrey in some of her features. I loved him for giving me the greatest gift.

We stayed in for the day. We did different activities; painting, puzzles, dancing. Bonding time with Ezinma was everything. I loved to see her fascination in the wide eyes and open mouth. Her curiosity laid within the wrinkled eyebrows and curled lip. Her smile was big and laugh similar to her dad.

Ezi helped me with dinner. She showed me that she was smarter than I thought. It would only be a matter of time where she would test me. I don't know who would be the bad guy between Aubrey and me.

“Daddy! I wan Daddy!” Her little hands tapped my thigh. I was in the middle of cleaning. Dinner was a success. “Daddy, mommy!!! Please!!”

“One second, baby.” Winking at her to settle her anxiety. I rushed the dishes to find her with my phone. We shared glances. She couldn't unlock my phone; perplexed that her fingerprint didn't work. “You want your print in my phone?”

“Yes!!!” A loud yell that turned into a giggle. Not sure if she really understood.

It was like clockwork. I unlocked my phone and Aubrey called. Ezi was too excited to answer. Lighting up to see Aubrey. He was on his way here. I was beyond perplexed. The phone sat in my fingers.

“You're coming here?”

“Yes.” A soft smile. His eyes on the road. He was driving. “And, yes, I'll be alone. Respect is the least of your worries.”

“I disagree.”

“You shouldn't and you know that.” He laughed.

I watched him pull to a stop. I watched him get out of the car. I knew he was here. I ended the call. “Daddy's here!!!!”

Ezi and I playfully ran to the door. She beat me to the door. I opened it to see Aubrey standing with a box in his hands. A cute present box decorated for Ezi. Tilting my head to the side; I don't know what it is.

“I got you something special!” He lead the way to the living room. “I think you're gonna love it!”

I watched the unveiling of the present. I was shocked myself. It was a puppy. A blue nose pitbull puppy with blue eyes. Ezi was in love.

“What are you gonna name him?” I could see it was a boy.

Ezi looked at me unsure. It never crossed her mind. I could feel Aubrey's eyes on my. I didn't look. I petted the new puppy while Ezi thought. It was several long minutes. I stepped in to help; the first name that popped in my mind.

“Let's call him Ryder--”

“Ryder!!” Snuggling him tightly. I think she liked it.

“He's all yours Ezi.” Aubrey smiled. Capturing the moment of them two. It was adorable.

“Thank you.” Her eyes focused on her new pet.

“Help me bring in the stuff. I got more stuff in the car.” Our eyes met coincidentally. “Please.”

Following his words. Grabbing a bed, cage, food and toys. Finding the right places to put everything.

“At least you're getting what you've wanted.” He smiled.

“When did you get him?” Cleaning the new dog dishes.

“Yesterday. I know we should've talked about this but I just really wanted to get Ezi one. Jonny showed me one that was perfect. And I know you know how to train dogs so it's all good.”

“What are you doing?” I felt like we were moving backwards suddenly.

His smile was gone. “Nothing--”

“Don't lie to me.” My eyebrow raised with a smirk. “You're making up with a dog. What do you want?”

“What happened to you the other night at Rosedale?”

Shaking my head. Continuing with the cleaning. “I was tired. Odell and I are fine.”

“I'm not asking about Odell--”

“Mommy, Ryder food.” Ezi came into the kitchen with a focused look. Ready to get her new friend food. I had to hold back a smile.

“It's coming right up baby.” Getting a good serving ready. Handing the bowl to Ezi. Watching her place it near his water bowl. He was hungry indeed. Ezi watched while clapping her hands.

“I'm not done with this.” His words in my ear. His body quickly brushed against me as he passed. Ready to teach Ezi a few things.

A warm bath and bedtime story. She had Ryder sleeping in his own bed in her room. She wanted him close.

Aubrey made himself comfortable. A glass of white wine and a gelato for me. Standing beside him in the kitchen. It was crazy how moments like this were the best. A time we both stopped and enjoyed. It was always my favorite time. Just unwinding with each other.

Dell: checking in. Hope all is good with you and Ezi.

I could feel Aubrey's eyes on me. Watching me respond to a text.

“You were out of it the other night.”

“I was tired.” I watched him take my spoon and eat my gelato. “Why does that bother you?”

“Because you lose track of you sometimes. I know how you get.”

“I'm a big girl now. I can handle myself.” Stealing a bite of ice cream to reassure him.

“Can you?” He didn't seem convinced.

“So this is what you do now? Come running to me when your girlfriend isn't here? Aubrey, I'm not a place holder or a scratch that needs to be itched. You're not gonna play me like a second fiddle.”

“When have I ever treated you less? When have I ever put you sec--I'm not doing this with you.” Eating in silence. I could see his frustration in his face.

“You choose to throw a fit because you can't have what you want. No one told you to be with someone--”

“When are you gonna learn to stop rebounding niggas? You love him so you say but let's be real, you just wanted someone to take your frustration out on. You just want him because someone else is loving me right now and you don't want to fight.” He stopped eating.

“How can I trust that this time is different?”

“Fight for me if that's what you want.”

“That's how we got here.”

“We got here because you were scared of something that will never happen.”

“I'm sorry that I told you to move on.”

The space between us closed. Bodies rested against each other. Faces were inches away. His touch was still electrifying. I missed his skin.

“We can't do this again.” Shaking my head. Creating space again. “I'm not going to hurt him.”

“It's gonna hurt anyway. Your heart isn't with him. I have what you've been looking for.” My eyes rolled. “But if I'm swaying you back to me and you really love him then let me know now.”

He stood there waiting. Eyes watching my lips to say more.

“If you're unhappy then why are you still in a relationship? I'm not a rebound for when shit hits the fan.”

“I never said that I was.”

“You didn't say anything and that's worse. You're acting on impulse right now because our family looks good. I'm not gonna risk being okay for you to hesitate on being with me. You're spiteful when you're hurting.”

“Do you love him?”

“You love her. You can't have things your way--”

“You can't keep running from your happiness. You can only keep up that facade for so long.” He walked away.

I followed him to the front door. He stopped. Pulled me into a deep hug. Holding me tenderly. His scent lingered in my nose; recalling all the good times in the beginning. His lips landed on the side of my forehead. Pulling away to show his effect on me.

A tear slid down my cheek. Wiping it away as he watched.

“Ugh, I didn't want this happen.”

“What?” His smirk appeared.

“You leaving a mark on me.”

“Am I still your best friend?” His soft smile was there.

I couldn't help but laugh. “Get home safely.”

He knew what he was doing. Testing me to see where I was. I was still in the same place no matter what time.

The next weekend, I was in New York. I brought Ezi along. A change of scenery. Ryder was staying with my mom. Aubrey was back in LA. This weekend was dedicated to Maya. It's been too long. Dress fitting from the bride and her party. I was excited. She was glowing in happiness. I approved of Lou.

At night, Janai and I worked on bridal party plans. A bachelorette getaway to Punta Mita. The wedding was in Hawaii. It was coming up in less than a month. Ezi sat in my lap helping as much as she could before falling asleep.

“Yaya, could you keep an eye out of Ezi please?” Standing in the doorway of her bedroom.

“Where you going?” A smirk on her lips.

“Gonna grab a drink with Odell.” Adjusting my over the knee boots.

She shook her head. “I got you. We need to talk though.”

“Gotcha. Love you.” Quietly moving back into my room. Grabbing my bag and kissing Ezi on the cheek.

Odell had a car sent out for me. Taking me to a bar on the Lower East Side. Walking in to see him in the back on his phone. Wrapping my arms around him. He held my hands before pulling me into a hug. Something was off about him. I could tell in his eyes. The bartender slid me a glass of Cognac.

“You look sexy.” His lip licked. His eyes fell on my hoodie dress and heels.

“Thanks.” My head rested against my hand. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing.” He shook his head. Taking a sip of water.

My eyebrows wrinkled. “You're not good. How was Miami?”

“It was cool. How's the bridal plans?” His eyes were on his phone.

My fingers pulled his chin to face me. “Odell, what's wrong?”

“I can't do this anymore. I can't be with you.” My eyebrows wrinkled again. “I went to Miami and I slept with someone that I've been seeing for the last month.”

I scooted away. “Why?”

“It happened in the moment and after I just didn't feel as bad as I should. You're a good girl. Your heart is beautiful and I appreciate what you've done but I can't love you. I'm never gonna be the man you want. I can't do this long distance thing either. I know why you can't move and it would be selfish of me to ask for more. I just don't feel like we're gonna work. I'm not trying to keep pushing it either.”

I sat there in silence. Registering everything. Still unsure if I should speak. He was looking at me.

“I'm sorry--”

“You're sorry it happened the way it did not because of what you did.”

“Zhuri---”

“Don't try to be understanding. You wasted our time creating this idea that this could be great when you weren't feeling this at all. I had confidence in this and I shouldn't have. This was a mistake. I fell for it and I hope you got what you wanted.”  

Leaving immediately. I was angry. I was hurt. I felt stupid. I feel stupid. That's all I could think about. Going to sleep in bed with my daughter. Holding her tighter.

In the morning, she spoke to her dad. I spoke with Maya. Recalling the last few months that she never knew: feelings about Odell and Aubrey. Catching her up to last night. Feeling stupid for falling into Odell.

“It's okay, Uri. Don't beat yourself over this. No one saw this coming and had someone did, this wouldn't have happened. I look at this as a wake up call. Wake up and realize that the man that still has your heart wants you more. He wants to love you still despite everything that has transpired. He's been waiting for you through all of this. Trust me, he'll leave her whenever you said yes. You just have to let yourself realize that's what is for you.”

“It's really funny how things happen.” Shaking my head.

“It's funny how hardheaded you are. You're blessed that things aren't worse.”

“I know.”

“Look, let's do something spontaneous. Come out to LA.”

Shaking my head. “Love you but I'm going back home to work.” Giving her a hug before. Leaving her room.

My flight was at noon. I checked out early enough so Ezi and I could get to the airport on time. Ezi had her ups and downs for flights. Today was going to be a down day. Fussing because she didn't want to leave Auntie Yaya and her friends.

We landed safely back home. It snapped in her mind. She was ready to be with her best friend: Ryder. Her excitement heightened after picking him up from Ma’s house.

They ran around and played until dinner. Like usual, she was ready for a bath, story and FaceTime with her dad. Things were back on schedule. Day care in the morning for Ezi and Work for me. Things felt good for the most part. I had more time for me and less for someone else. I got back to the little things that I lacked.

I started to plan Ezi’s third birthday party. It had to be better than before. Maybe this time at the zoo or the aquarium. She loved both. Maybe an aquarium would nice. She loves Disney so a trip there would be fun. I think Disneyland might be it. She's always gonna be a princess.

I visited family every few days. One night at Ma’s house. Another night with Dean. One night with Day. Another night with Uncle Steve and Sandi. Some of my siblings came over for dinner and long talks. They always ended up spending the night. One night, I called Bailey. My baby was doing well in Howard. I planned on visiting her with Eva for a weekend.

Maya called again a week later. Wanting me to visit in LA. This time I did. I left Ezi for the weekend at her grandpa’s house. She was going to be fine; she wanted to show off Ryder.

Landing in LA with Shay. It would be more fun. We visited LACMA; photos like we were tourists. Grabbing lunch and dinner at our favorite spots. Ending up in Maya’s living room drinking wine and watching good shows. Waking up in the morning to do the same thing over again. Instead our next night was different. We went out to private gathering thrown by Aubrey.

Rolling up weed in my corner behind the crew. Maya and Shay were getting drinks. Socializing a little more than me. Someone was playing their set. I couldn't see. The beat dropped. Taking a hit as Jon B’s voice played on Cameras. My eyes hit briefly as I exhaled the smoke from my lips. Mumbling the words before taking another hit. My eyes opened to see the everyone in the moment rapping the words. Aubrey in the middle of answering a text; his girl wasn't here tonight. Maya slid me a glass of Virginia Black. Taking a sip of that in the mix of everything.

“You good, Uri?” Mark yelled into my ears over the music. He smiled at this moment. I haven't smoked since law school.

A giggle and nod to assure him. He was probably gonna smoke a blunt himself. Somehow I exchange glances with Chubbs and Noel. We all ended up laughing. We were enjoying this moment.

I enjoyed myself. Switching between my drink and my blunt. Allowing Shay to get a few hits in. I didn't even realize Aubrey watching me until he walked up to me. I tilted my head slightly in curiosity. His dark smirk made me smile. The smell of his cologne was sweet. I wanted him now but I couldn't have him.

His eyes observed every inch of my body. Hesitating on what to do. I didn't dress for him; I knew he liked the simplicity of my clothes. I felt eyes on us. I didn't care. No one was going to say a word nor were they gonna stop us.

“Say what's on your mind.” My lips touched his ear. My hand rested against his beard.

“You don't want to know.”

My eyebrow raised. A smirk on my lips. My expression read my emotion. “Figure out if tonight is worth it.”

“Uri…” Chills ran down my spine. He hasn't called me by my nickname is so long. “You wouldn't be here talking this shit that you're talking right now.”

“You love her. I have nothing to lose.” A laugh almost escaped.

“Is that why you're here?” His face was perplexed.

“That would be too easy.” He laughed at my words. I put him in a tough position. He needed pressure.

Moving away to talk with Maya. She shook her head at me. She knew what I was doing. An old trick out of her book. We laughed to ourselves. I enjoyed the night. Slick, funny comments while rapping the words of parts of songs. Shay and I together was a trip. Adding Maya only made things more memorable.

Somewhere in the night, Amanda came. She brought a friend. Running figuratively to the arms of her man. I laughed at the thought of them. Keeping to myself to enjoy the night. Amanda didn't say anything; exchanging one glance every so often.

“I don't know about y'all but I'm hungry as hell. I'm going to IHOP.” Maya brushed through her curls with her fingers.

Shay and I laughed. “I'm down for it. Plus, I'm tired of this scenery.”

A quiet nod from me to agreeance. With that, we left. Saying goodbyes to the crew. I didn't embrace Aubrey at all. Amanda was all over him; she was probably drinking as well. I didn't want to say anything.

A trip to IHOP with a full table of food at four in the morning. We ate everything and tipped well. Crashing at Maya's house. The walls weren't thick enough though; Maya went home to sex with Lou.

My body wouldn't let me sleep past nine. I went for a jog that was interrupted by Aubrey calling me. He woke up with me on his mind; he couldn't be with Amanda anymore so he wasn't. A full conversation about random little things that us smile and laugh. The conversation turned into a brunch. Sitting across him with a river of emotions. My heart was pounding him my chest. It felt like the first time again. Being with him for the first time. He dressed casually but it was something more attractive his look. He did it on purpose.

“You have nothing to lose?” His eyebrow raised. He couldn't hide his smile.

“Could you show a little more empathy?” I laughed him off. Drinking water with my eyes peered at him.

“I'm sorry to hear. How are you feeling?” Trying to be somewhat concerned.

I chuckled before drinking more water. He was slightly shocked before laughing with me. “It happened and it's over.”

“Guess it was tough breaking it off with him---”

“He cheated on me...he's been been cheating on me and he confessed and there was that.” His face grew serious. My eyes dodged his for a second. “He beat me to the finish line.”

“You decided to act out--” My eyebrow raised at him. “You were crossfaded--”

“But I was still coherent of everything. I wasn't acting out. Acting out would be doing reckless things that would be acceptable if I wasn't a mom.”

“Ezi's always on your mind.” He smiled.

“Because I'm making the right decisions for stories to tell her when she grows up. Trust me, I've made mistakes but I want to do better for her and myself as a woman.”

“Meaning….”

“Meaning getting our lives back to where they belong...together. I don't regret treating Amanda different either just for the record. She is a replacement to me. Like why else would be pick to be with someone that's a lawyer and strong and independent? I know you wanted me so made it happen by hiding because you didn't want it to be real.”

He chuckled. “You're reading me as though you didn't know all of this. You still made your decisions because you're stubborn.”

“Reasons why you still want me. All I'm saying is leave her and I can make this work. I'm not competing for a spot with my name on it. From there, we can work on us...you know move at a right pace and then live that fairy ending that we wanted.”

He smiled with a shaken head. “Could you be less of a lawyer and more of my….”

My eyebrow raised. “Your what, Aubrey?”

He took a sip of water. Squinting his eyes to find the right words but he couldn't find them.

“Your baby mother, your lover, your best friend, your confidant, your friend, your girlfriend, your wife, your significant other...what?”

“My best friend by your definition of the word.” Throwing back old moments. A smile between the two of us.

“It's all over.” A realization hit.

“What are we?” A serious look into his eyes made me melt.

“Together working out the downfalls because I want to be married to you with time.” Looking at him differently. His boyish smile escaped and I fell in love.

[cg29]

Can’t sleep, so decided to share these for @gumnut-logic - Two chapters from my Tracy Family fic. (Completed) They were written a couple of years ago and are not my best work, but they are both Virgil centric, so hopefully they’ll bring a smile. (2nd may require tissues)

***

TITLE: The Birthday Gift, part 1. Brotherly Love.

‘Mm, 7am.’ Virgil thought to himself as he opened his eyes slightly and glanced at the clock. ‘A couple of more hours will be good.’ To make himself more comfortable, Virgil rolled over in his bed, with his eyes shut, puffing up his pillow as he did so. Letting out a comforting sigh, his eyes flickered open and then shut. ‘Wait, what the…’ Virgil’s eyes shot open again. Okay, his eyes weren’t deceiving him. There was his oldest brother, sat on a chair next to his bed, bouncing up and down, like a nonstop Jack-In-The-Box. “Scott, its 7am.”

“Yes and?” Scott said happily, as he continued to bounce up and down on his chair.

“Scott, what is wrong with you… Or should I really ask, how much candy have you eaten?”

“None, yet… But the day is young!”

“And how many coffees have you had?”

“Only 2. Although I did have 3 energy drinks as well this morning.”

“Yes, I can tell!”

“Well, I needed the energy to keep me going for your big day.”

Seriously Scott, you are like this every year with all of our birthdays and I’m sure you get worse every year.”

“Yes, and?” Scott replied beaming like a Cheshire Cat.

“You do realise I’m 22 and not 10 today.”

“So?”

“Scott, we’re not kids anymore!”

Scott stopped bouncing up and down and surveyed his younger brother. “Yes, you are… You see little bro, in my head all I see is the excited kid who would rush out of bed so that he could open his presents, before shovelling down pancakes for breakfast and then stuffing himself silly later in the day with his birthday cake. I’m afraid Virg, that you are stuck with this for life. Even when we are all grey and old… I’ll be waking you all up early for your birthdays, even if I need to hit you with my walking stick to get you up. Besides, you need to get out of bed because Alan and Tin-Tin get back from their honeymoon later and it would be rude not to be awake and alert for when they arrive. Plus, Kyrano is making all of us pancakes, Grandma is making you a birthday cake, Penny is flying out here as well, then we can all have a big party later tonight and you can open all your presents.”

“Presents?” Virgil asked with a grin.

“Yes, presents… Lots and lots of presents. Of course, my present to you is obviously the best!” Scott started to become excited and began bouncing up and down on his chair.

Virgil lay on his bed and shook his head. “You know who you remind me of when you bounce up and down like that?”

“No, who?” Scott inquired beginning to clap his hands together joyfully as he continued to bounce up and down.

Virgil let out a laugh. “Tigger, from Winnie The Pooh.”

“Who...Hoo…Hoo…Hoo” Scott bellowed out loud at the top of his voice.

“You’re not letting me get back to sleep again, are you?” Virgil asked pulling his big eyes look at Scott.

“Nope! And you should know by now that look doesn’t work on me.”

“Please Scott, just 1 more hour? Then I’ll promise to get up.” Virgil pleaded, pulling his big eyes face again.

Scott stopped bouncing up and down and tilted his head sideways as he looked at his younger brother. “Okay, just 1 hour, and if you’re not up then I’m dragging you out of this bed.”

“Deal.” Virgil answered, relieved that he may finally get some more sleep.

Scott stood up and turned towards the door as Virgil settled himself down in his bed. “Nah, changed my mind.” Scott said as he turned back towards Virgil pulling the blanket of him. Virgil went bright red and made a grab for the blanket pulling it back over himself. “Oh, err… Sorry Virg. Err. Maybe I should have got you some Pyjamas for your birthday instead? Yes, anyways, I’ll be going… and let you get ready… Don’t be too long Virgie…

“Okay Scott, I’m getting up. Now get out.”

“Okay, I’m going.” Scott went towards the door.

“Oh, and Scott…”

“Yes bro?”

“Don’t call me Virgie!”

“Okay, okay,” Scott went to pull the door shut calling out to Virgil as he did, “see you in a bit. Oh, and happy birthday… Virgie!”

… … … …

TITLE: The Birthday Gift, part 2. The Last Gift.

Virgil sat by his piano in a world of his own, playing some new music, he had received for his birthday. Meanwhile, Jeff Tracy stood leaning against the doorway listening to the beautiful melodies that were flowing from his artistic son. “Virg?”

“Virgil glanced up from the piano and smiled at his father. “Oh, hi dad. Sorry I didn’t see you there.”

Jeff walked over to his middle child and sat next to him. “Did you have a good birthday?”

Virgil grinned while he continued to play the piano. “It was fantastic dad, thank you for the party.”

“Anytime son,” Jeff replied, pulling Virgil into a warm embrace.

Virgil returned the hug and then looked at his father. “Is everything okay dad?”

“Yes, it’s fine. I just… I wanted to let you know how proud of I am of you, all that you have achieved and everything I know you will become.”

“Thanks dad,” Virgil replied slightly blushing.

“Plus, I wanted to give you this,” Jeff pulled out a small box and a card from his pocket and handed it over to Virgil.

Virgil took the gift and card from his father and held it in his hands. “Thanks dad.”

“It’s not actually from me,” Jeff looked down, then back up into Virgil’s eyes, “it’s… it’s from your mother.”

“Ah?” Virgil responded looking at the gift in confusion.

Jeff breathed in deeply and continued. “Your mother’s family have always had a tradition… On a child’s first birthday the mother will choose a small gift that can be found within the home that they believe encompasses their child’s personality. They will wrap it and put it away ready for when they turn 22.”

“Oh… Why 22 and not 21?” Virgil asked.

Jeff chuckled to himself. “I remember asking your mother the same question. Apparently, even though 21 is usually seen as someone stepping into adulthood, the family itself felt that 22 was the official age, because when you are 22 then you’ve officially left those childhood years behind and become an adult… Your mother really wanted to continue this tradition and I remember how happy she had been, when it came to her picking out the gift, wrapping it and then writing the accompanying note… A short time after she had passed, I found the gifts for all of you boys packed carefully away. I decided that she would want all of you to receive them as planned… So, I gave Scott and John theirs when they reached 22, and now… Now it’s time for yours.” Virgil glanced thoughtfully at the gift and card in his hands, unsure of what to do. “Do you want me to stay, while you open it?”

Virgil nodded, carefully opened the card and began to read.

...

My darling Virgil.

So, today is your 22nd birthday, that’s hard for me to imagine right now as I sit here writing this on your 1st birthday and stare over at you fast asleep in your father’s arms.

I know my son, that whatever you do, or whatever you will become, I will always be proud, and both myself and your father will always be there to hold you whenever you need a helping hand.

The gift I have chosen for you encompasses something I have noticed from the beautiful personality that you are starting to develop. Ever since you were born you have been soothed by music, whether that be a record, when I am singing you a lullaby, or when I am practising on my beloved piano. So, that is why I feel that this gift is perfect for you.

Always here, never far.

Your mother. xx ...

Virgil with tears in his eyes passed the card over to his dad and cautiously began to unwrap the gift, revealing a small black box, which when opened played a gentle lullaby. “A Music Box.” Virgil exclaimed, with tears trickling down his face.

Jeff put his arm around his middle child and held him close. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, thank you dad,” Virgil replied wiping the tears away.

Jeff smiled as he looked at the music box. “I should have known she would have given you that music box. You loved that lullaby when you were a baby.”

Virgil smiled. “So, what did Scott and John get?”

“Well, it seems your mother sussed you all out really well. John was given a golden star that used to hang on the Christmas tree, he had been so fascinated by that star, even though he wasn’t that old on his first Christmas. He was also enamoured with the star mobile we had above his bed; I remember your mother saying he would probably end up in space just like me… And Scott…” Jeff let out a laugh. “Scott was always trying to climb the furniture and jump of it. Whenever he saw a bird or an aeroplane, he would go quiet and watch with fascination. Your mother gave him an old air loom of her grandfathers, a small-scale Spitfire… Anyway, everyone is probably gathered in the kitchen waiting for you to cut your cake, are you coming?”

Virgil nodded, carefully picked up his gift and card. Then with his father’s arm placed around him they both left the room.

[pisati]

I was pretty shell-shocked after my dad passed. I knew it was coming for 11 years. but the feeling of permanence didn’t hit me until I reached out and held his hand as he lay where he died; in his bed, cold and stiff. the hospice chaplain said some soothing words I can’t remember. I looked up and I remember a very slight, very deep panic hit me. it wasn’t supposed to be today. I didn’t get to say goodbye. did he know I loved him? where the fuck do you go from here?

we went back the next day to move everything out. my uncle came down from new york to help; my cousin had seen my post about it on facebook and told him, and he called my mom to tell her he was coming. she hadn’t even asked. we didn’t even know where to start. I told mom, just get it out. I know what I want to keep. if I can’t decide now I’ll keep it until I do. mom was clearing off the dining table he’s had for years. she asked me if it was okay to throw out some fortune cookies that had been sitting there amid the clutter. almost definitely from one of our dinners. I don’t know if he ordered from the chinese restaurant next door when I wasn’t there. I started crying almost immediately and shook my head. it really wasn’t okay.

this was going to be a lot harder than I thought.

I don’t know how we did it in one day. we got lucky to get some junk haulers to come that day (usually they’re booked out well in advance, but of course you can’t predict these things. it was september 26th, and we didn’t want to pay october rent). we loaded up my uncle’s truck and my mom’s car. unloaded furniture at my aunt’s house 15 minutes away. I was stone-faced the entire time. my mom and uncle made a drop-off without me at one point and I sat on the floor and looked at the empty space and cried again. I was just here. he was just here. I was just sitting with his doctor, wheeling him out of his last appointment in his wheelchair. he just joked with the security guy and the lady taking payments for the parking garage. we were just sitting in the bank together, putting my name on his account. I’d just brought him skittles in bed, because he wanted something with flavor. I had a long day, I wanted to get going home. I turned out the lights, left his classical piano radio playing. “love you, sweetie, goodnight”, from his bed. I said “goodnight, love you too”, and held my hand on the doorknob. I paused for a second before I opened it. I don’t know why. maybe somehow I just knew that would be the last time I’d see him alive. at one of his last appointments, I heard his doctor tell him she worried that 4 weeks without chemo would be too long. we tried one last round, but a week in he decided he’d had enough. he made it 5 weeks. and suddenly here I was. in an empty room.

I think we went back the day after that to finish up cleaning things and hand in the keys. we all went to a deli for lunch. I really wasn’t hungry, but I ordered pancakes anyway. safe enough. had to choke back tears once again as I sliced through them, because I realized that I always prep my pancakes the way dad taught me. I even remember him teaching me. butter in between so it melts with the heat, then cut into thirds lengthwise and crosswise. then syrup. I shoveled piece after piece into my mouth so I wouldn’t cry.

I don’t remember the next few days. I remember going to target at one point, not sure if I needed something or not. but I’d found a gift card dad had given me for my birthday the year before and it still had money on it. I wandered the store in a haze, not really looking at anything. I wanted to gift myself something that I would enjoy that reminded me of him; something I feel like he would have given me himself. I found a collection of necklaces and bracelets in the jewelry section; each one was held by a card that had a description of the symbolism. there were some tacky, cheesy ones, like love and faith and a lot of other bullshit you’d see tattooed on a white girl, probably. but the one that stood out to me was a delicate sterling silver necklace with a tiny v-shaped charm at the center, labeled gratitude. “everything comes to you in the right moment. be patient. be grateful.”

I had to go through all his stuff after I brought it home. mom doesn’t like a mess, and everything we’d brought home was sitting on the first floor, taking up almost the whole room. all dad’s paintings, his two computers, his art supplies and cleaning stuff and appliances. everything. he didn’t own much, though, so it was manageable for me. I brought what I thought was the most important stuff up to my room and I sat on the floor and sifted through it to organize it. I shredded a lot of old papers. I didn’t even know he kept all the divorce papers. all the attorney letters. old receipts. but I found important things too, that he and I never looked at together. his high school and college diplomas. his work from college on cancer research (the irony). his old glasses, even from childhood. family history records, dating back to the early 1800s in what is now croatia. so many pictures. letters from his mom, when she and grandpa lived in arizona. I never got to meet them, but I think I really would have liked my grandma. I think I got her smile. she was a gorgeous lady. and sounded so sweet. I found a christmas card from her, and she had written in “you are always in our thoughts, know that you are loved – mom + dad” and I burst into tears again. he’d even kept his baptism certificate, and the little milestone calendar they gave his mom at the hospital when he was born. december 28th, 1945. his little, tiny footprints in ink on the first page.

then I found his birth certificate.

it hit me like a truck. I could hold his birth certificate and his death certificate both in my hands. a whole life between two pieces of paper. and that’s all that’s left. that, the box of ashes at the foot of my bed, and a few storage bins of things, most of which I know he didn’t even care about. I could hear his voice in my head when I couldn’t decide on what to do with something of his: “it doesn’t matter to me, whatever you want to do, sweetie”. is that really it, then? suddenly you’re here, suddenly you’re not? and what is there to show for it?

but the more I think about it, the more I’m determined to say that can’t be it. maybe he was here for a tiny blip on the timeline that is human history. maybe we all are. maybe once his brother is gone and my brother is gone and my mom is gone and I’m gone, it might be like he never existed at all. he’ll be a name in an obituary, a co-author on one research paper that probably isn’t even useful anymore. so it is with everyone who has ever existed, whose faces I’ll never see, whose names I’ll never know. maybe on a grand scale, none of us are important. did he have a purpose here? do I? I know why I’m here. I’m here because my mother always wanted a blonde, blue-eyed little girl, and by 30 she felt her time was running out. she married the first one who’d agree to it, and she got her blonde, blue-eyed little girl. except that’s about all the expectations of hers that I met. she wanted the child in her dreams, she got me. I didn’t ask to be here. nobody did. we all end up here somehow, and we all die.

maybe there is no point. but my dad’s effect– all the words, actions, lessons he taught me– are still with me and always will be. they’re in the way I prep my pancakes. they’re in the way I drive; he was much more patient than my mom and had me from sitting nervous in a parking lot to cruising down the highway in 2 hours; she could barely get me on the road without yelling at me. he taught me the word empathy before I could even understand what it meant. I hope I never forget his laugh or his smile, but if I do, that’s okay, because I’ll know at least that I got to enjoy them at one point in my life. maybe cosmically speaking none of us matter. but my dad means so, so much to me. and maybe that’s what’s more important. mattering to the people that matter. who cares if some person in the distant future doesn’t know who I was? what I did? I’d rather have them know me now, rather than not being able to control the game of telephone that undoubtedly happens through time. how much do we really know about anyone we don’t know personally?

what was the reason my dad was here? who knows. but he still tried to enjoy the little things. he tried to make people laugh, with his weird sense of humor. I just saw on timehop today, 3 years ago, dad had probably called me. it snowed a lot that winter. “this is great packing snow. I asked about 20 people to have a snowball fight and they all refused”. the last few years he only ate sugar-free candies because he said the sugary ones made him kind of sick, but he kept 40-count boxes of fruit gummies at home. he’d take a few in his bag when he’d go places and hand them out to cashiers, bankers, waiters, his nurses and doctors. just to see them smile over something little. once I got a fortune in a fortune cookie from one of our dinners; it simply said “it tastes sweet”. I showed it to him, confused but still slightly amused by it. he said, “that’s life, sweetie. dolce vita.”

sweet life. he’d been depressed and suicidal for years. and yet.