#and oh it aches that whenever fourteen looks at his niece

[batsyvie]

she reminds him of his rose

[marmolady]

Roots

Book/Series: Endless Summer

Main Pairings: Estela x MC/Taylor (f)

Summary: Post-ending (Endless Ending) Follow on from ‘Home, Sweet Home’. Taylor is adjusting to a life beyond La Huerta, and seeing for the first time what she’s really missing.

Word Count: 5741

Warnings: Coarse language, non-graphic sexual content

Reviews and reblogs are hugely appreciated!

Tagging: @brightpinkpeppercorn @sceptilemasterr @bbaba-yagaa@edgydepressedchoicesthot@blightarts@princessstellaris@acidsugar0@taramitch96 @sapphovonchat @strangerofbraidwood @noeschoices @kennaxval @queerchoicesblog

A small smile played on Nicolas’ face as he turned another page in the album. His eyes skimmed images he’d long been afraid of seeing, the memories painful in light of all that had been lost. He lingered upon the face of a young girl, frozen in time, caught in a laugh. That sweet smile was so distant a recollection that he’d almost forgotten it had ever been there. He’d grieved that carefree child.

Hearing the faint sounds of stirring, the wiry silver-haired man rose to put some water on to boil. It had been so very long since he’d shared his home; not since Estela had left for Hartfeld, putting into motion what he’d been sure would be her destruction. It had been his greatest failure. That his niece was alive -alive and a free woman, back home at last, was something of a miracle. Nicolas had no faith in miracles.

It was the pilot who stumbled out of bed and down the hall first, hair ruffled from being slept on.

“Buenos días, Lobito.”

“Hey, I told ya, Master Shifu, nicknames are my thing!”

“How I would hate to step on your toes… I trust you are well rested?” Nicolas poured out a steaming mug of coffee for his guest.

Jake took the drink with a word of thanks and ran his free hand over his stubble, thoughtful. This was not exactly where he’d expected to find himself, hiding out in his favourite sparring partner’s San Trobidan home. Estela had been desperate that he wouldn’t retreat back to a life of solitude, of putting on a carefree air that hid the truth of himself. He had been resistant, but when the chips fell, he’d taken the chance to dream of something better. For the time being, that meant going with the flow, trusting that between his friends -now as good as family-, gaining his freedom would be just another challenge that they’d rise to. Estela had been right about him; he wasn’t ready to give up the people he loved.

“I slept all right.” He paused. “Ya know, when I agreed to come, I didn’t realise I’d be taking Katniss’ mom’s old room. I told her I didn’t mind takin’ the couch…”

Nicolas shook his head briskly. “Don’t be stupid. It’s just a bed. If I’m honest, it’s a nice change to have the house not feel like it’s echoing with ghosts. If Estela had a problem, she’d let you know. I’m sure you already know that.”

Jake couldn’t hold back a quiet snicker. Damn straight, he already knew that. “Man, do I. You raised a force of nature, right there. I wouldn’t mess with her. But it’s like she gets it in her head the way things should be, even if it ain’t what she needs.” He sat down at the table across from the older man, and glanced over the album, then noticed the wistful expression on Nicolas’ face.

“I always wanted her safe,” the silver-haired man said sadly. “It was why I was involved in this damn war to begin with, why I taught her to fight, to survive since she was small. But then Olivia was killed. In her grief, everything I’d done to protect Estela made her a danger to herself. I tried still to guide her, to give her half a chance to succeed. To stop her would be to stop a runaway train; I could not, but I could try to minimise the damage. When she left, I knew I had failed her. The little girl my sister had loved so much was gone. The war had been won, but the very thing that had inspired me to fight for a better future was destroying itself. I knew I would likely never see her again, long before the news reached me that she’d been among of group of students who’d disappeared on Rourke’s island.”

Over his coffee, Jake found himself thinking of his own family… back home waiting for him, no doubt having come to accept that he was lost to them for good. It had to be the worst kind of torture. They knew now, at least, that he was alive… or he had been on the fateful day he’d set off for La Huerta. What needed to be said… Jake wasn’t sure it could be done over the phone. Not after all these years. He looked up from the coffee and realised that Nicolas was reading him like a book.

“I’ll put my folks outta their misery soon. Maybe it’s selfish to wait, but I can’t bring myself face them before they know the truth. Hearin’ the shame in my mom’s voice? It’s bad enough in my head, let alone… ya know?”

Nicolas took a long drink of coffee and sat up straight. “It’s never too late to go home. Whatever lies she’s been told; no doubt your mother will be ready to hear your story whenever you are ready to share it. I understand, though. I have always been so proud of what I’ve been fighting for; to have it twisted into everything you’ve stood against… that cannot be easy to bear.”

“Huh, that it ain’t,” said Jake dryly. “But I’ve gotta believe someday soon it’s gonna change. I’ve been too scared to hope for so long… guess that’s the first step. I know what I’ve got, and I’m sure as hell not gonna throw it away.”

“Well, I’ll drink to that, my friend.”

There was a shuffling of two pairs of feet on the old tiled floor. Estela practically skipped to her uncle, and threw her arms around him in a big hug. “Morning, Tio!”

“Morning, Estelita.” Nicolas couldn’t help but be tickled by the obvious spring in her step. “I take it you slept well.”

“Yes. I didn’t realise I missed my old bed. It felt nice to sleep there, and with Taylor.”

“Aw!” Taylor took Estela in her arms so that they were pressed cheek-to-cheek, and squeezed her around the middle.

“Dios, girl, you really are getting soft!”

Estela rolled her eyes defiantly, but held her wife all the tighter. She noticed the album her tio had spread across the table. “It didn’t take you long to drag that out. I’ve been back five minutes and you go straight to the embarrassing photos.”

Jake’s eyes gleamed. “Totally here for baby Katniss in ugly dresses… Nineties fashion, can’t beat it, ya’ll.”

“Ah, you caught me reminiscing…” said Nicolas.

“And I’m going soft, Tio?”

“Oh, who cares?” Taylor said, jiggling with excitement. “I’m all in for baby Estela!” She leaned in close and cooed, laughing a little as Estela hid her face. “So. Freaking. Cute. I can’t even take it.”

They gathered around, poring over the photographs. A whole life in pictures; so much that Taylor could never have truly imagined. She reached out, delicately stroking an image that seemed to grab her right by the heart. A tiny Estela, barely more than a newborn, held tenderly against her mother’s chest. Oh, how Olivia looked at that little baby… the love was so intense it felt to radiate off the paper. Somewhere in her subconscious, Taylor knew she’d felt it before, when she’d been lost beyond the world of the living. It made her heart ache. For what had been taken from Estela. For what she herself had never had.

“This one’s beautiful…” she croaked.

Estela had turned away, pained. She nodded, almost imperceptibly, before recovering herself. “Yes. She was very beautiful. Sadly under the delusion that little me looked good in tie-dye, but I guess no one’s perfect.”

Feeling Taylor’s gentle pressure on her hand, and concerned eyes studying her, Estela made the effort to give her a smile. It was all right. Memories hurt, but they were also healing.

The pages kept turning, a life playing out before their eyes. Birthdays, holidays… and all those small moments that stuck in the mind, building the person Estela would become. Such rich depth was almost beyond Taylor’s comprehension… how limited her view on the world was. Bittersweet emotion churned through her; love and loneliness, the piece of her heart that was Estela swelled, but the rest echoingly hollow. That her own emptiness might threaten to overwhelm her was, Taylor knew, completely selfish. This wasn’t about her. What mattered was that her wife was helped along the process of letting go. Looking at the serene face of a young Estela, surely no older than nine, sitting by a campfire, toasting marshmallows with her mother, Taylor pushed away those intrusive thoughts. She fondled with Estela’s fingers and smiled as she felt the gesture returned.

“Where is that? It looks pretty.”

“It’s a way out of town. We used to go out there a lot when I was little, actually, before the fighting spilled out into that part of the country. There were trails through the forest, all leading out to the most beautiful lake. I’ll take you there sometime.”

“I’d like that.”

Aware of the emotional undercurrents just below the surface Jake was uncharacteristically cautious about taking shots at Estela’s expense, and, for the most part, took in what was being shared with him quietly. That he was invited in to see her vulnerable meant something to him, and he was honestly touched.

“What- wait a minute! How old are you, waving that sword around?” Suddenly, Jake’s eyes were like saucers. That girl was a special kind of hardcore… and he was immeasurably grateful that they tended to be fighting on the same side.

Estela shrugged. “About fourteen. I wasn’t especially skilled, even though Tio had sort of taught me with blunted blades before then.”

“That would be around the time he stabbed you, right?” Taylor queried, automatically glancing to her wife’s chest, where she knew a jagged scar told the story.

“Woah, what?!”

Nicolas scowled. “It does not sound good when you say it like that. Estelita, what stories have you been telling her about me?”

With a snort, Estela shook her head. “Only the truth. I did mention that it was my fault for being stubborn and overconfident. But, yes, that was just before Tio nearly gutted me.”

Jake gave an appreciative whistle. “Still; next-level badass. Colour me impressed.”

“Mom was not. We tried to hide it, but she could always see right through me.” Estela shared a conspiratorial smile with her uncle. “I think that’s the maddest I ever saw her.”

“Joder! She wanted to bury me alive. Impaling her bebé on a sword- ha!”

“So, no more sword-fighting lessons… that Mom knew about, anyhow.”

 ______________________________________________

For Taylor, San Trobida was a brave new world, one that she took on with her characteristic daring. She had Estela right beside her, after all, who knew the place like the back of her hand. It was eye-opening. When they went for groceries for Nicolas, it occurred to Taylor that she hadn’t so much as walked into a supermarket in her life. It was the stupidest little thing, but it made her bravado falter. Estela zipped around efficiently, knowing where to find everything she needed, for she’d gone through the routine countless times before, since she was a child trailing along by her mother’s hand. She pointed out all the little things to Taylor and Jake; the cakes her mom would bring home on special occasions, the sought-after snacks that the kids in school would get into fist fights over… the small details that made the place wonderfully nostalgic. Jake countered with his own childhood tales. And then there was Taylor, for whom that kind of profound nostalgia was something she could only dream of. She kept on smiling, appreciating those windows into her friends’ lives, but somewhere beneath it, there was longing.

“Earth to Princess!”

Taylor was stirred to her senses, looking out over the beach, now bustling with locals. They’d settled down there for lunch having throw together a modest picnic. Quietly taking it all in, Taylor had found herself dwelling once more on that hollow feeling in her heart.

“Are you okay, Taylor?” Estela asked, offering her a plate. “You look like you’re miles away.”

“Oh, yeah- fine. Just tired, that’s all.” They had only just made the journey to San Trobida the day before, after an emotionally taxing farewell to their friends. Considering that just over a week ago Taylor had been clinging to life by a thread, it was natural that she be exhausted. The look that Estela gave her, though, suggested that she wasn’t buying it. “I’ll be fine once I’ve got some food down me. Pass the patacones…”

Estela let it rest… for the time being. She trusted that if something was bothering Taylor, she’d let her know in her own time. She loaded up Taylor’s plate and left a kiss on her cheek. Truth be told, being home was strange for her too. In the years leading up to her departure, she’d rarely come up for breath between helping her tio in the rebellion and readying herself to bring Rourke down. Any waking moment that she wasn’t needed for something, she’d be training her body, pushing herself farther, harder. Now… it was hard to know what to do with herself. She couldn’t exercise, not with her savaged leg still healing. All that she had to share with Taylor and Jake were ghosts from a distant past, the past she’d never given herself the space to properly grieve.

Her thoughts were disturbed by Taylor violently spluttering her juice.

“Tio! You’ve gotta warn people before you add booze to their drinks.” Estela took a sip and grimaced. “And that’s way too much. She’d be dancing naked on the tables after two solid gulps.”

Jake scoffed. “Lightweight!” He reached for the boozed-up juice and chinked it to Nicolas’ glass. “Cheers.”

With a roll of her eyes, Taylor edged a little closer to her wife and spoke under her breath. “So, uh, we’ll save that naked dancing for later, right?”

After lunch, Jake went off on his own, staking out this new environment. Estela and Taylor walked -or limped in Estela’s case- with Nicolas along the edge of the water, sharing stories. The limp was of some concern to Nicolas; his niece had taken some brutal knocks and scrapes in her time, but that lameness could be plaguing her for some time to come. Still, she was still in better shape than he’d expected to find her. Oblivious to his worry for her, Estela was cheery… abnormally so, as if on some sort of high from the simple pleasure of being home. She laughed airily as she lashed out at him, goading her tio into a playful scuffle. Nicolas jabbed her hard in the ribs, but she just giggled and retaliated further. It was new. They’d sparred so many times before, but it had been purposeful, deadly serious. Now… now Estela just wanted to play, to reach out and love her uncle. Frolicking like a spring lamb, she overexerted her poor leg and collapsed into the wet sand, a goofy grin still on her face, even as Nicolas took the opportunity to clock her around the head.

Seeing her wife so completely at ease fed Taylor’s soul. It was hard to believe how far Estela had come from the woman who was prepared to throw all of this away if it meant she could take her revenge. Taylor had brought her home. Her short life amounted to very little, and she felt it acutely, but was one impact she wore with pride. There it was again; that feeling of being… incomplete. The rapport that Estela had with Nicolas, born of a full life history, of seeking the love and guidance of a parental figure; Taylor couldn’t have known quite what she was missing until she’d seen it, shining and wonderful before her.

All of a sudden, that utter joy she felt for Estela slipped away, replaced with something new. It was deep envy, almost… resentment. Sickened with herself for feeling it even momentarily, Taylor just wanted to hide in shame. That wasn’t the person she was; this was what she’d been prepared to sacrifice herself for. But facing up to the truth of what she was had thrown her. 

San Trobida was as scarred and beaten down as the people who lived there, but it was rich with people and their experiences. Every other person they crossed paths with, Nicolas had a story to tell of… most frequently of hardship during the difficult years of the civil war. The woman holding the fresh smoothie stall, whose son had been in the year above Estela in elementary school, who’d perished at the age of only fifteen having joined the faction rising up against Salazar… when they’d greeted her, she looked at Estela with a heart-rending mixture of joy sorrow in her prematurely aged eyes, and offered them each a drink on the house. It reminded Taylor how shallow her life experience was; she had known and loved Estela all her life, but Estela’s life was made up of so much more than that small window. On La Huerta, lost with her friends at the end of the world, she hadn’t felt just how alien she was; but this was reality, and everything she lacked weighed heavy. Taylor had nothing beyond her not-even-two-years of existence. No connections, no roots woven into a family, a place, or a community. No history, no childhood. And no one could ever truly understand.

Ashamed of herself, Taylor was distant and quiet for the rest of the day, despite all attempts at putting on a brave face. When Jake innocently tried to goad a smile out of her, she all but took his head off, and then felt even worse. Of all the people to take it out on… he had everything she was longing for, but it was all out of his reach. It was just so messed up, and she couldn’t stand it. Taylor retreated further into herself, explaining away her behaviour to a concerned Estela simply as tiredness. By dinnertime, genuine exhaustion exacerbated her nagging sadness, and she couldn’t wait to retreat to her bed, to stop pretending.

_______________________________________

With the dinner dishes put away, Taylor finally sank into the mattress, and felt relief course through her body. No more putting on a brave face. Estela followed after her, dark eyes soft with concern.

“Taylor…” she said quietly. “Is all this weirding you out? You can talk to me.”

Looking away, Taylor nodded. “A little, yeah. I… I think I need to take a lie down. Is that okay?”

“Oh. Okay. Do you want me to get you anything?”

“Maybe a glass of water? And a kiss, please.”

Estela reeled Taylor in and held her against her chest, leaning down to kiss her forehead. “…Te amo.”

Taylor hugged back, utterly grateful for the woman who’d invited her to share her world. She’d find her place there for sure, but the kind of connection she craved, that would take time.

“…Love you too. So, so much.”

As she went to leave, Estela’s gaze lingered on her wife’s eyes, reading the strange sadness that hung there and silently giving her support. This was what they’d dreamed of, but that didn’t make it easy. To be on the outside, seeing the world in a way that everyone around could not begin to understand… Estela knew it, she’d felt it herself. She couldn’t offer her soulmate a past, memories to fill that hollow void; all she could do was to take Taylor and ensure she was deeply entwined into her world as it stood now. To make her feel that this was real, that it was hers.

Left alone, Taylor fell backwards into the mattress with a heavy sigh and stared at the ceiling. Within moments, her cheeks were wet. She wiped away the tears hastily and breathed deeply. Guilt gnawed at her. She should have been happy, not raining on Estela’s parade. But even just in that small room, there was so much history, and it made her feel tiny. The mattress shifted as Estela sat down. Taylor nuzzled into the hand that stroked her face, and kissed Estela’s wrist.

“Here…” Estela offered the water, helping her wife to sit up. While Taylor sipped, she massaged her shoulders and back. “Does this help?”

“…Mmmmmm… you’re good at that. Thanks, love.” Even as she relaxed into the soothing touch, her quiet insecurities and loneliness lingered. How ridiculous, she thought, to feel lonely, when she was so very much loved. “I know it’s dumb. I just hadn’t quite felt how much I was missing. Not until I saw you with your tio. And looking through all those photos. You’ve lived a real life… and I know it’s not been an easy one, but… but it’s what you’re made from. You’ve got real memories, family. With me, there’s nothing… nothing beneath the surface.”

“You have family, Taylor. It looks different, but that doesn’t mean it’s not real.” Estela gently brushed away a lock of blonde hair and kissed the back of Taylor’s neck. “And it’s not dumb to feel that way. You’re only human.”

Taylor sniffed and leaned back into Estela, letting her arms and legs wrap around her from behind. Only human… ha.

“Oh, if only.”

“Look, people can be alive for ages and never actually live. It’s not been long, I get it, but the way you touched us all… that’s not nothing. All the best parts of me are there because of you. It’s not blood, but that doesn’t mean it matters less.”

Her lip trembled, and Taylor felt herself squeezed lovingly. Estela trailed kisses up her neck and along her jaw. Held tight, Taylor could cry out her sadness without shame or fear of judgement.

“Love you, Estela,” she sniffed. “I know I’m lucky. Incredibly lucky.”

“But it must be lonely. It’s not as if anyone can really understand what this is like for you. I just wish I could help.”

Taylor nodded and wiped her face, before reaching back to fondle the dark hair that tickled her cheek. “Yeah… yeah, it is… kind of lonely. But you do help. I feel guilty for wanting anything more than that- I’m so damn happy with you, and it’s a miracle that it’s even possible.” She sighed. “Maybe I just needed a good cry, you know?”

“You’re allowed to feel more than one thing at once.” Adjusting herself so she could look her wife in the eye, Estela studied Taylor with tender concern. “Hey… if this is too much for you, we don’t have to stay long. We can go back to La Huerta anytime. Whatever you need.”

“No. No, it’s not that I’m not happy here. I love it here. It’s like I can feel you all around me, and it’s magic. I’m really excited to get to know your tio… but part of me wishes we could just skip to the part where I’m family to him.”

Estela shook her head, an amused smile coming to her face. “Taylor, he loves you already! There was almost enough rum in that juice he poured you at lunch to knock you unconscious. That’s Tio speak for ‘welcome to the family, chica; you’re in’. If I hadn’t hammered it in that you’re supposed to be resting, he’d be training you up on the sword by now.”

In spite of everything, Taylor giggled. “That was a hella strong drink. It’s no wonder you can handle your alcohol if he was the man who raised you.”

“Tio doesn’t warm to people that quick; he can see that you’re my family, real as anything.” For a little while, Estela was quiet, searching her mind for the best way to help. It dawned on her that she was not the person best placed to give what Taylor needed. She pulled her phone from her pocket. “Here. You should give Diego a call. I’d guess he’s been missing you.”

Taylor’s eyes grew misty at her loyal friend’s name, and she gave an appreciative nod. “Yes. I bet he has.” She brought Estela’s face close to hers, until their lips met. “Thank you. Really.”

Caressing her lover’s face, Estela kissed her once more. “You’re not alone, love. Never.” With one last squeeze of her shoulders, she left Taylor to make the call.

The phone rang. Taylor, suddenly anxious to hear Diego’s voice, strummed her fingers against her thigh. Pick up, pick up…

“Taylor-baby!”

And then a huge grin split her face. “Diego! You haven’t forgotten me? Found a new BFF?”

Diego laughed. “You caught me. I’m best-friend-cheating on you with Raj. What can I say? There’s a special bond you can only get by being Freaky Fridayed with someone.”

“I know you’re shit-stirring, but that’s not funny, okay? It’s crazy how much I miss you already. Well, everyone really, but especially you.”

“Uh, Taylor, it’s been a day…”

Taylor faltered. Man, it had felt so much longer... “I know. I’ve just… never known any different. Actually getting out here in the world beyond La Huerta, it’s kinda confronting.”

For a moment, Diego was quiet, as though picking up on her underlying sadness. “Hey, put it on video. I’ve never video called to San Trobida.”

Clicking on the video mode, Taylor couldn’t hold back the smile when she saw her friend grinning back at her. “Here you go. San Trobida. I’m just hanging out in Estela’s room right now; I’m pretty wrecked to be honest. So, how’s Raj’s place? What’s his grandma like?”

“Eh, you’re still recovering from being almost dead; you’re allowed to be wrecked. Once we got back home, I realised just how much I couldn’t face my parents right now. They’ve ignored my messages, so nothing new. But it’s all good, all good… it’s not as if I’m all alone on the world. It’s pretty chill here- obviously. Raj’s grandma is seriously the nicest person on earth; she’s like… a walking hug. And ohmygod, the food! We’re actually gonna have a big dinner with everyone round before I head back to La Huerta.”

“Ugh, I am crazy jealous that you get to meet and get fed by the famous Grandma Bhandarkar…”

They chatted happily, and Taylor’s woes felt so much less significant, forgotten in the excitement of catching up with all that had happened in the day her friends had spent home again. At one point, Diego took the phone briefly into the kitchen, where Raj and his grandmother were cooking dinner together, putting Taylor on speaker to say hi. The laughter slowly faded to a comfortable silence as Diego studied her quietly.

“Taylor… you are okay, right? I’m pretty indebted to you in the pep talk department, so you can lay it all on me.”

If only he knew how much she appreciated him… so much more than the sidekick he’d once considered himself. Taylor’s smile wobbled but held up. “I’m okay,” she said, firmly. “I think Estela wanted you to pep talk me up, but actually… I know what you would have said to me. And I know you’d be right.”

“…You’re losing me now…”

“Thing is, I’ve got all caught up in my head, feeling I’m missing out on some of the stuff that matters most. You know; history, family, a childhood… I’m not really even freaking human.”

“But you are.”

Taylor smirked. “That’s what I knew you were gonna say.” Her smile grew broader. “Vaanu made me from you, and then when I was broken, you all rebuilt me. My memories of you rebuilt me. So I guess… you’re my family. And the rest I… it’ll just take some time.”

“Of course we’re your family, you dope!” Diego’s eyes had grown misty. “The best kind. It’s not about being related to someone. My mom and dad…” His voice cracked. “Let’s just say, they’re not a great model of what family should be. We’re not like that, you and me.”

“No, we’re not like that. I guess, go through the end of the world together, you’ve got a bond that can withstand anything.”

Diego smiled sadly. “We better bring my parents along to the next apocalypse, right?”

Taylor wished she could reach through the screen and hug him. In her longing, she’d oversimplified the human experience. Being a bit of a mess- now that was human. “I’m always here for you,” she whispered. “And you know… they’ll come around. You saw it, and I honestly believe they’re gonna wake up someday and realise how amazing you are.”

“So, uh, I guess we just ride this out together. ‘til it gets easier.”

“You got it. I’m sending you a virtual hug and we’ll talk real soon, okay? Love you, buddy.”

The warmth in Diego’s eyes was palpable, even through the window of the small screen. “Talk later, Taylor. Love you too- bye…”

Hanging up, Taylor leant back into the headboard and breathed out. This wouldn’t be easy, but she had everything she needed… and her friends needed her in return. She wiped away those last tears as the door creaked open and Estela peeked in cautiously. Taylor scooched to the edge of the bed, drawn forward as if by a magnet and got to her feet.

“Hey, gorgeous,” she winked as she took a step forward, and her heart melted at the tenderness she saw in Estela’s eyes. She needed to be closer to her.

“…Hey. Did… that help? I can give some more space if you need it. I get it. This is… this is stuff you’ve never really had to confront before. Not really.”

“It really helped, yeah. But there’s, uh, actually something else that’s been bothering me.”

Estela faltered, lines of worry returning to her face in an instant. God, she couldn’t stand it when Taylor was hurting… she’d take her every burden and carry it herself if she could. “Oh? Anything I can help you with?”

“Actually, yes. This bed of yours… isn’t it about time we tested it out properly?”

“Oh…”

And then the worry was gone. Estela’s features shifted into a lustful and expectant smile. Could Taylor know just how much she yearned to hold her? Without tearing her gaze from her lover’s eyes, which were bright with desire, she pushed the door closed and nudged in a wooden wedge with the side of her foot. It was better they were not disturbed.

Taylor flicked her tongue out over her lips, responding to the heat that flared out to her from that look. That look that made her legs weak. They hadn’t done this, not properly, since she’d given Vaanu their essence back. She’d been frail, tiring at the slightest exertion, and Estela nervous of causing her harm. Backing towards the single bed, she beckoned her lover in with an enticing curl of the finger and unbuttoned her shirt, just enough so she could slide it down to reveal her shoulders. The sharp exhale that reached her ears made Taylor smirk. “So, you’re interested?” she taunted.

Estela surged forward and captured Taylor’s mouth in a messy kiss, shutting her up. They fell back into the mattress together, all in a tangle within seconds. Taylor grasped a handful of dark hair, anchoring herself in as her lips crashed against Estela’s hungrily.

“Oh god- ohgod, Taylor…”

“Shhh… just kiss me…”

A teasing smile came to Estela’s face. “You promise you won’t fall asleep on me again, mi amor?”

Taylor gasped dramatically and slapped her on the butt before redoubling her efforts, tongue lapping wantonly at her love’s sweet-tasting mouth. Estela was grinding hard against her thigh and even as they’d barely begun, soft moans vibrated against her lips. Taylor came up for breath, panting.

“Too rough?” Estela stopped in her tracks, concern showing in her eyes. She stroked an errant lock of hair from Taylor’s face.

“Maybe a little?” Taylor met Estela’s hand, and took it to her lips for a gentle peck. “Here- “ she tugged at her wife’s pants, “what I’m really thinking is that there are way too many clothes getting between us right now. May I?”

Kicking the last pieces of clothing into a haphazard pile on the floor, Estela pulled Taylor back into her arms and guided her gently down, never losing eye contact. “Is this better?” She kissed slowly, smiling against Taylor’s lips as she felt her melt into the tender caress.

Taylor could only respond by whimpering blissfully into the kiss, her heart racing, eyelids fluttering. A trail of goosepimples followed the stroke of Estela’s fingertips over her thigh and inwards. Oh, how she loved her… she could just shout it from the rooftops… but the words escaped her. She could only grasp, and feel, and kiss… her blissful moans joining her love’s in an ecstatic duet.

Afterwards, they lay together, legs entwined. Estela kept on stroking the backs of her fingers over Taylor’s cheek, leaving delicate kisses in their wake and smiling helplessly. This was truly heaven on earth.

“I just can’t stop kissing you…”

“I don’t mind.” Taylor exhaled in contentment and nuzzled close to Estela’s face, wishing she could just breathe in the very essence of her. She hummed throatily. “…my starlight…”

The love that hung off every sound made Estela giddy. She kissed a tender trail down from Taylor’s ear, tracing her jawline, feeling her relax totally in the embrace, breaths becoming slow, deep, peaceful, teetering on the edge of slumber. Estela let her eyes flutter closed, her lips resting at the base of her wife’s neck. Her words were a whisper against Taylor’s soft skin. “… I love you…”

Her fingers guided Taylor’s to her chest, where the Andromeda sigil had been inked permanently over her heart. This was where Taylor’s roots were, tethering her to what mattered, her mark left indelibly. If only she could realise it.

“…see…you are my heart…”

Taylor’s fingertips traced the symbol on her wife’s body with a featherlight touch, and she felt a lump come to her throat. In all ways that mattered, she was ingrained into the lives of her loved ones, as they were in herself. She took Estela’s hand, bringing it to her own chest and smiled as Estela’s eyes opened a crack, gazing upon the Draco sigil there before kissing Taylor’s neck once more.

“… And you are mine. My heart… my home… my family. Always and forever.”

[shawtygonemad]

My Dog Eared Hero: Chapter 1

Hello all! Please read this cringey fanfiction I started to write when I was 11. I have tried my best to edit it, but I also don’t want to break my 11 year old self’s heart. Please read at your own risk.

Rated M for mature language and cringe. 

***

Katara Higurashi is a twenty year old woman from America. Her mother, Suki Higurashi, was from Japan while her father Jordan Lawther was an American. They met when Suki was an exchange university student. They fell in love quickly their first year of school. A year into their relationship Suki fell pregnant with Katara. The couple was surprised, but thrilled nonetheless. However, tragedy fell eight months into the pregnancy - Jordan passed away suddenly. He was on his way home from work when his car slid on some black ice and rolled into a ditch.

Suki was devastated, but knew Jordan wanted her to have a happy life with their daughter. So Sukie decided to stay in America and raise Katara there. They of course visited her family in Japan as often as they could. Suki and Katara ended up living the life Jordan and Suki planned. She was a doctor and Katara had a great childhood. 

A few months before Katara’s nursing school pinning Suki was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Barely a few months passed and she was gone two weeks after Katara’s twentieth birthday. It tore Katara to pieces. She ended up selling the house and everything in it. Her mother had planned on taking Katara to see the world after her pinning, so Katara decided to fulfill her mother’s wishes. Katara took the money she received when the house sold, and went road tripping around the country for a few months.

It took thousands of miles, 25 states, and a lot of soul searching for her to finally come to the fact that she needed to put her mother to rest. She had her cremated when she first passed, but couldn’t bring herself to say goodbye. Now she finally had to. She was going to take one last journey with her Mom to Japan. She was finally bringing her home to the Higurashi shrine.  

Fourteen hours later she found herself walking up the steps to the shrine of her ancestors. Katara’s grandfather, aunt, and cousins Kagome and Sota lived here. By the time she reached the top she was winded. Katara had her backpack, luggage bag, and her mother’s urn. 

It was quiet and no one was out and about which is weird since it was almost nine in the morning. Straight ahead of Katara was the sacred tree. It used to scare her as a child whenever she would visit. Something about it always made her skin crawl and her chest ache whenever she’d look at it. Even now, her chest felt a dull pain just glancing at it. To the left of her was the actual shrine and to the right of her was a pink house in which her relatives lived. As she approached she noticed her aunt at the kitchen window probably doing dishes. Her aunt glanced up and caught her eye. Within a second her aunt was gone and running out the front door to see her niece.

“Katara,” her aunt cried and she embraced her niece. “My sweet girl, are you doing alright?”

“Yeah, auntie. I’m fine,” Katara replied with a sad smile.

Auntie looked down at the urn in Katara’s arms and tears welled up in her eyes.

“Is that -” she began.

“Yeah, that’s mom.”

“Can I… can I hold her,” Auntie’s voice cracked which broke Katara’s heart.

“Of course,” Katara said as she passed her mother over to her sister. 

“Let’s get her all set up and then we can go inside for some brunch. How does that sound?” Auntie sniffled. 

Katara gave a sad smile, “That sounds great.”

Auntie and Katara took Suki’s urn and placed it in the family shrine. Auntie placed flowers in front of it while Katara laid down some treasured items that Suki loved. She also placed an old picture frame with a photo of her mother and father together.

“At least they’re together again,” Katara said softly.

“C’mon,  let's get you inside and feed you something. You must be exhausted from traveling all day,” Auntie guided Katara into the house.

“I’m alright. I’m used to traveling so it doesn’t bother me much.”

Once they were inside Katara sat at the table while auntie made her a plate of food.

“Where is everyone,” Katara finally asked.

“Well, Sota is at school. Your grandfather went to the marketplace, and Kagome -”

“I’m home!” They hear a young woman’s voice from the front door.

“Kagome, darling! Welcome home! You’re just in time. Katara just got in.”

“Katara? What are you doing here,” She excitedly greeted her older cousin by giving her a hug. “Wow, you seem so… different.”

Katara laughed, “That’s what happens when you’re no longer a sixteen year old.”

“But seriously, what are you doing here? It’s been awhile since you’ve came to visit,” Kagome asked.

“She doesn’t know?” Katara looked over at her aunt, confused.

“She hasn’t been home for me to tell,” Auntie began.

“It’s been six months! What do you mean she hasn’t been home?”

“What’s been six months?” Kagome asked, confused.

“Honey, sit down. I need to tell you something,” Auntie started to tell Kagome.

“I think I’m going to go up to Kagome’s room and unpack my things. I really don’t feel like sitting through another one of these conversations,” Katara said before getting up and heading upstairs.

Katara blew up the air mattress and began to unpack her little tote she bought for her mother’s celebration of life. Holy water, rose petals, heart felt relics, etc. As she began to unpack her clothes the window flew open and a man with long white hair and a red kimono was crouching on the window sill. 

“Kagome, did you really have to run off like that-” he began before stopping once he sees Katara.

“What the fuck,” Katara said loudly. “Who the hell are you?”

“Who the hell am I? Who the hell are you? Where’s Kagome,” He asked before leaping further in the room. 

That’s when Katara could get a better look at him. She saw dog ears attached to the top of his head, his eyes were golden, and his nails were long like claws.

“What are you, some sort of cosplayer,” Katara questioned.

The man held up his clawed hand and smirked at Katara. “Do these look fake to you?”

They most certainly did not. Katara paused a moment to take him in again. Everything looked so real. It was as if he came directly out of one of gramp’s crazy “evil creature” stories. If that was the case, then -

“Oh hell. You’re a… You’re a demon,” Katara concluded.

“Yeah, what gave it away,” the man said sarcastically and rolled his eyes. 

Katara quickly grabbed her bottle of holy water and splashed it on the man. He hissed in pain and took a step back.

“Gah! What the heck is that stuff?!”

“Be gone, demon! I don’t know what you want with my cousin Kagome, but you can’t have her!” Katara said as she splashed him once more. Grandpa would have been proud.

“Stop that! What the hell are you talking about? Ugh, you’re just like that old man,” the demon said. He must be referring to gramps.

If gramps couldn’t kill him then Katara sure couldn’t. She quickly ran out of the bedroom door and slammed it behind her. She ran downstairs to find her aunt and Kagome gone. Oh God, that demon probably killed them! She ran out into the yard and straight for the shrine. Katara was going so fast that she almost ran head on into Kagome and Auntie. 

“Woah, Katara, where are you going in such a hurry,” Kagome asked.

“We need to get somewhere sacred - now! It shouldn’t be able to get us there,” Katara quickly rambled and grabbed Auntie and Kagome’s arms and went into the building closest to them. It just so happened to be the bone eaters well. 

The demon must have seen them go into the building and before following them.

“Kagome what the heck is going on,” it asked her cousin. 

Katara took a step back closer to the well once the demon stepped inside the building with no problem.

“And who is that crazy woman throwing acid water at me!?”

“Acid water? Wait, what’s going on?” Kagome asked, confused.

“That demon pounced into your room and demanded to know where you were! So I of course threw holy water at it. I knew it would only stun him. I ran outside to find you and auntie. So I did what gramps would have done and entered someplace sacred in which no demons should ever be able to enter. I guess that didn’t turn out so well,” Katara explained. 

“Ohh! Katara, this is InuYasha. Yes, he’s a half demon, but he’s a good one. We travel together,” Kagome said. “InuYasha, this is my older cousin Katara. She’s from America. She’s in town due to some… unfortunate circumstances that just happened.”

“What do you mean that you’re traveling around with a demon - excuse me - half demon?”

“It’s a long story -” Kagome began. 

“How is gramps not losing his goddamn mind over this?!” Katara exclaimed.

“He’s still not very happy about it,” auntie lighted touched on the matter.

“Why are you even allowing this to happen. For one, she is only fifteen years old,” Katara accused her aunt.

“Darling, it’s a long story,” Auntie started.

Katara took another step back exasperated. Her calves were practically touching the well. “What is wrong with you people?! If one more person tells me it's a “long story” I might just lose it.”

“And you’re not already,” the demon, InuYasha, sarcastically asked.

“Katara, just calm down-” Kagome started as she approached Katara like a wild animal. 

“No! I will not calm down. You are all crazy for even trusting a de- ah!” Katara was cut off by tripped over the back to the well and losing her balance. She fell backwards and down into the well.