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tinybibmpreg · 3 years

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prompt fill 7/80 - #11 - Have you seen the rest of their family? ft. Prince Richard Silvers, Klaude & Ezekiel Goldsborough (plus their father), and Elizabeth Valentine

oh boy this one is long. Richard and Klaude (and ezekiel and elizabeth) are characters i made years ago and wrote a bunch of stories for, but i never finished any of them. i do wanna rewrite those because i like them still lol. but have this new fresh thing with them instead, featuring both of the Goldsborough boys knocked up by their respective partners lmao

Silvers: Reunion

“Have you seen the rest of their family?” Richard asked, leaning in close to Elizabeth as they were escorted into the Goldsborough manor. “Klaude mentions his older brother and father sometimes in his letters, but I have no clue what they look like or what they're like.”

The younger woman shook her head, looking terribly nervous as they entered the huge house. She glanced around and fidgeted with a ring on her middle finger. “Ezekiel showed me a picture of his mom once back at the academy… but she passed away when he was a child, so I don't think that helps. Ezekiel mostly talks about Klaude when he mentions family.”

“Damn. That totally sucks. I should have done research. I don't even know anyone's names.” He hadn't been nervous about coming to stay with Klaude at his family’s estate at first. But now upon realizing he was going to seem foolish and uncaring, his usual confidence was dwindling away. He didn't want Klaude to think he wasn't interested in the rest of his family, to give him any reason to suspect he hadn't wanted to show up.

When getting married, one was supposed to be at least familiar with one’s partner’s family.

He'd just been so desperate to see his fiancé again that he'd bypassed everything else.

“Well, their dad’s name is Raoul, and their older brother is Manson,” Elizabeth said. “Ezekiel calls his two sisters by nicknames, but they live with their spouses so they shouldn't be here.”

“They have sisters?”

“Yes. It goes Manson, Klaude, Hattie, Lin, and Ezekiel.”

Richard chuckled a bit. “Zeke’s the family baby, huh?”

“Their sisters have kids, so those are the family babies…”

Why did Klaude have to be so tight-lipped about everything? He hadn't mentioned being an uncle, or that he even had sisters.

They were escorted through an entrance hall to a large study. Richard perked up as they walked in, but their escorts left them with just Klaude and Ezekiel’s father. There was no sign of the brothers. Richard struggled to keep from deflating. Elizabeth’s fidgeting increased.

“Ah, Prince Silvers, Miss Valentine. Welcome to my home. Was your trip pleasant?”

Richard took over the conversation before Elizabeth could have a chance, giving her time to calm her nerves. “It's wonderful to be here. Our trip from the Silvers Kingdom went smoothly, if not a bit slowly for my tastes.”

“I'm sure the two of you were eager to be here.” Though Lord Goldsborough sounded pleasant enough and had a small smile on his face, the look in his eyes was anything but friendly and welcoming. Richard couldn't blame him, considering the circumstances of why they were there. He applauded the man for being so composed. If the situation were reversed, his own father would have been livid. “Your sister, Princess Ronella, is not with you?” the man asked.

“She is back at the Silvers Palace, studying. Miss Valentine is now capable of providing the magic I need, so my sister doesn't have to trouble herself following at my heels wherever I may go.”

“I'm sure it's no trouble, helping her brother.”

“We adore each other, but circumstances kept her from her proper education. I'm glad she's able to return to her schooling at home and to spend time with her mother, as young girls should.”

“Indeed. And things have settled, in your kingdom?”

“Very. It is peaceful at last, and the people flourish. Miss Valentine was a wonderful help to my father and king and I.” Elizabeth jumped a bit, stuttering that she had just tried her best. Richard gave her a side-eye glance and patted her arm. “Without her magic, I may not have been able to come and pay my respects to you, Lord Goldsborough, and I would not be able to see Klaude again.”

“Thank goodness for Miss Valentine then. Klaude and Ezekiel are eager to see the both of you later.”

“A-are they doing well?” Elizabeth asked.

Lord Goldsborough gave them both a strained smile. Richard vowed to himself that he would find some way to apologize to the man, on behalf of himself and Elizabeth, but mostly himself. He was sure Lord Goldsborough would be more forgiving of Elizabeth, a sweet girl who hadn't intended to defile his youngest son. Richard knew that on the other hand, he'd caused a full-blown scandal, and the blame for it laid mostly on him. Now Lord Goldsborough had to rush to arrange a wedding between his second eldest son and the crown prince of a large empire, whereas Elizabeth and Ezekiel had a bit of time and far less prominence.

“They're both doing well. Klaude will be especially glad for your arrival, Prince Silvers. He has yet to give birth, though the doctors say he is due any day now.”

“I'm relieved I could make it in time before the birth,” Richard told him. “Is Klaude here? Ah, and Ezekiel as well?” he asked.

Lord Goldsborough took a seat on a fine chair, crossing one leg over the other. “You’ve both had a long journey. Why don’t you sit and have some refreshments? Klaude is resting, but I’m sure he’ll be up later in time for dinner.”

They’d been sitting on a train for hours and had eaten right before arriving so they wouldn’t have anything in the way of seeing Klaude and Ezekiel right when they arrived, so Richard absolutely did not want to sit again. However, he had to be polite. It wouldn’t do for a prince of his standing to turn down his host, especially not after his sister had drilled it into him that he had to actually behave like a royal while around nobles.

So he gestured for Elizabeth to sit at the end of a loveseat and took a seat on the cushion next to her even though he felt like Lord Goldsborough was purposefully keeping them from seeing his sons. “Thank you, Lord Goldsborough. We’d love some refreshments after our trip.”

“I’ll go ask a maid to bring some tea. Then we can discuss a few important matters.”

“Of course. Whatever you’d like.”

Lord Goldsborough stood and left to speak to one of the servants they’d passed on their way to the room. As soon as he’d left the room, Elizabeth turned to Richard and said, “I wonder why we can’t see Ezekiel… he said Klaude was resting, but he hardly mentioned Zeke…”

Richard slumped back and scoffed. “He’s not letting us see them yet because he hates us, Elizabeth.”

“Wh- what?!” she cried. He shushed her and glanced back at the doorway. Though frazzled, she quieted down and asked, “Why do you think that? Does he really hate us?”

“Of course he does,” Richard replied. He shrugged and looked around the room. Nothing caught his eye. All the decorations and furniture were standard for a nobleman’s manor, all expensive but impersonal items to show off wealth to any guests. Elizabeth looked even more anxious, so Richard explained, “Elizabeth, two of his sons are carrying our children, children conceived out of wedlock. His youngest is pregnant with a commoner girl’s child, and his second eldest is about to give birth to a foreign crown prince’s illegitimate firstborn. It’s a huge scandal for the family, especially with us being gone for six months. We can’t even marry early and try to conceal what happened. Klaude is due any day and Ezekiel is what? Almost eight months along?”

“Y-yes, almost eight… I can see what you mean, now… I never thought about it like that. I hope Zeke’s been alright. He was so worried when he found out about the baby, and then I had to leave and it took so long for us to come back. I hope he hasn’t been stressed out about a scandal.”

Richard waved her concerns off. “Eh, Ezekiel’s probably not too affected by that. Klaude and I are the ones with the major scandal.” Which Klaude had complained plenty about in his letters, even saying that he’d once nearly punched one of his relatives for making a comment about the baby being illegitimate. Richard had thought that meant his older brother and Klaude was just wording it strangely, but now he wondered if it was a brother-in-law that had asked Klaude how he felt about carrying a future bastard king.

If he could figure out which relative had said it, maybe he could humiliate them with a spell of some sort and make Klaude laugh. It was hard to get Klaude to fully laugh, and he loved whenever he managed it. Surely a good bit of revenge would work.

He hoped that Klaude’s father wouldn’t keep them apart for too long. Though he understood why Lord Goldsborough wanted them away from his sons, he missed Klaude and was impatient to see him again. It’d been a bit miserable back at home without Klaude to talk to every day. He missed spending time with the man and devoting his time to getting his cold exterior to crack. Those moments when he got to see Klaude’s softer, affectionate side… Moments he knew he was seeing a part of Klaude no one else got to see. He’d really missed them dearly.

Richard was also quite eager to see how Klaude looked, heavy with his child, ready to deliver any day. Klaude’s belly had been noticeably rounded out when he’d last seen him, a small swell that Richard could hardly take his hands off of. Having seen a few other full-term people before, it wasn’t difficult to imagine a full belly and swollen breasts on Klaude. And it was just as easy to imagine him still fitting into his typical formal and well-tailored clothes, even being nine months pregnant.

He sighed, wishing he could lean against his arm or bounce his leg. It was killing him to be patient.

Still, the image of Klaude and the good memories of spending time with him would have to remain just in his fantasy for now, until dinner. It would be rude of Lord Goldsborough not to have all of his family within the estate present at dinner when they had a guest of such high standing. At least Richard could count on that, that the nobleman wouldn’t dare to break the rules of high society in front of the heir of a kingdom much larger and far richer and more prosperous than his own country.

Glancing at Elizabeth, who was now solely focused on fidgeting with the spinning rings Richard had ordered to be made for her, he wondered if she was thinking of the same thing. Ezekiel was a bit too sweet-looking and gangly for his own tastes, but he imagined that being pregnant had filled the scrawny young man out and given him a healthier flush to his usual pallor. Certainly, it would suit him.

Richard told himself it was to help snap Elizabeth out of her anxious state, but he just really wanted to tease her to take his mind off of not being able to see Klaude yet as he asked, “So, how do you think Ezekiel looks?”

“Hm?” Elizabeth’s head shot up. Richard reached over and tried to fix her hair so it wasn’t so messy. He and his sister had tried to get her to stop looking so ruffled, but no matter what they did Elizabeth always looked like she’d been caught in the wind or had fallen. “What do you mean? He should look like he usually does… just, um, pr-pregnant.”

“Exactly. Klaude’s told me in his letters that he’s blaming me for how much sweets he’s been craving. Do you think Ezekiel’s indulging?”

She latched onto the wrong thing. “But you hate sweets…?”

“Beth. I have been utterly consumed with thinking about how I’m going to be putting my hands on every inch of Klaude’s heavy belly, and on everything else that’s changed with the pregnancy. You haven’t been thinking the same of Ezekiel?”

“Pr-Prince!” She covered her mouth with her hands, flustered.

“He’s always been a skinny little thing, and you’re a big girl. I bet he’s huge. I bet his breasts are nice and large as well, to feed the big baby you stuck in him.”

“I don’t get how you can say stuff like that with a straight face, Prince!” she squeaked. “Why do you always tease me like that?”

“You’re so easy, that’s why. Come on, haven’t you been thinking about it?”

“Of course I have! But I wouldn’t say it out loud!” Richard put a finger over his lips to shush her and she glared at him. “Prince…!”

Before he could keep teasing her, he heard footsteps. Richard looked behind them at the doorway and Lord Goldsborough returned, followed by a maid holding a tray with tea. Richard straightened up, putting on a charming smile.

“I hope I didn’t keep you waiting long. I had to attend to something,” Lord Goldsborough said as he took his seat again.

“Not at all.” Richard took a cup of tea and waved away the maid when she offered milk and honey. He waited for Elizabeth and Lord Goldsborough to take their own cups before taking a sip. Then, he asked, “What was it that you wished to discuss?”

Lord Goldsborough set down his cup and put his hands on his lap. “I was hoping to take this time to discuss matters relating to your engagement with my son, about the wedding, Prince Silvers.”

Elizabeth took a sip of her tea to keep from reacting. Richard had no doubt she was remembering his many rants the past few months about how he didn’t care what they did for the wedding, that Klaude could handle that since it was going to be a wedding with Klaude’s country’s traditions. Richard would simply follow along, as anything would make him happy as long as Klaude was satisfied with it.

He wished he could say that to Lord Goldsborough, but didn’t think the man would enjoy hearing that Richard wouldn’t care if Klaude just wanted to sign a paper and go on with married life or if he wanted to consummate the marriage in front of everyone.

Definitely, he didn’t think Klaude’s father would want to hear that.

So he didn’t mention anything like that. “I’d love to discuss it. But shouldn’t wedding arrangements be made with Klaude…?”

“The family typically arranges things, and I have discussed things with my son in length the past few months. But since you’re a member of royalty, we would like to include you in arrangements, so as to avoid offending you or your kingdom.”

Richard did not mention that if Lord Goldsborough tried to discuss a wedding with his father or even anyone else in the royal court, that he would get laughed at and told the whole ordeal was ridiculous. He did not want to mention the words ‘concubine’ or ‘royal consort’ to Klaude’s father to explain that in his kingdom, Klaude would most certainly not be referred to as his husband no matter what their marital status was.

“Klaude has briefly mentioned to me how a typical wedding would proceed for your family. It all sounds quite agreeable.”

“Yes, he’s said you agreed with the procedures. But the details, rather, is what we would like your input on.”

“I’m sure whatever you have planned will be perfect! I don’t want to cause any difficulties when I know there is a limited amount of time to prepare things…”

Lord Goldsborough exhaled slowly. “It would be no trouble to fulfill your desires for the wedding… The staff is quite capable. And there is plenty of time to prepare.”

“But isn’t Klaude going to give birth any day now?” Elizabeth asked, and Richard wanted to take her aside and shake her for not listening to his sister’s social etiquette lessons. Somehow, Ronella would find out she’d spoken out of place, and he would be the one to get scolded for not looking out for Elizabeth.

Her question further strained the nobleman’s smile. It looked painful, how forced it was.

Richard wished he knew how to endear himself to Lord Goldsborough to make things easier on him. However, Elizabeth’s question made that impossible, driving it in that Richard was the reason he would be needing to prepare a wedding as quickly as possible.

At the awkward silence that followed, Elizabeth continued, saying, “If a wedding is difficult, then why not just have a small ceremony with an official? It’ll be quick and effective…”

“That’s preposterous. A small ceremony and impersonal signing before an official would be unthinkable for the Goldsborough family. And it would be offensive when Klaude is marrying a man of such high standing.”

“I guess it would be different than what a noble family is used to… but it wouldn’t be offensive. The royals in the Silvers kingdom don’t get married like people do here in Merlynd.”

“Yes, I’m sure their wedding customs are very different.”

Richard silently prayed to his patron goddess that Elizabeth wouldn’t mention that the kings of the Silvers kingdom didn’t have marriages, just accepted consorts that would bear children that would later be legitimized by the royal court.

His prayer went unanswered. She immediately replied, “The heirs and kings don’t get married at all, though.”

“What?”

Richard tried to salvage things, “While it’s true that we don’t get married in the sense that the people of Merlynd do, we do…” He had no idea what word to use in place of taking consorts or lovers. His pause made things worse.

Elizabeth seemed to realize that she shouldn’t have brought it up, leaning in towards Richard and asking in a whisper, “Is it not good to bring up royal consorts, or…?”

“Consorts,” Lord Goldsborough repeated, aghast. “You don’t take a husband or wife?”

“Klaude will be my husband according to Merlynic law, and I will personally consider him as such,” Richard assured.

That didn’t assure his future father-in-law. “And your kingdom will consider my son and his child as…?”

He avoided answering. “Merlynic law doesn’t apply in the Silvers Kingdom. But the concept of illegitimacy is very different and has nothing to do with marriage, in my kingdom. The term ‘bastard’ has no meaning. It will not matter to the royal court or to my father whether my child is presented for acceptance the moment after naming them or even years later.”

It was clear that Lord Goldsborough wanted to ask more about that, but he refrained, instead returning to his original topic. “Regardless… what would be your preferences for the foods that will be served at the wedding?”

Richard internally groaned. He hated details. At home, the kitchen would come up with things, and a list would be submitted to his father for approval. Sometimes Richard would suggest a meal if he wanted something, but his ideas were only ever one among the many ideas put forth by the staff.

How could Klaude’s father want to micromanage everything? Still, he had no choice but to go along with the tedious conversation.

He hoped that Klaude really was busy resting and was getting plenty of good sleep. At least then it wouldn’t be so bad, wasting his time discussing wedding details he was sure wouldn’t even come to fruition because of how quickly the wedding was to be thrown together now that he’d arrived.

“What do you mean Richard has been here for an hour already talking to my father?” Klaude snapped at a servant. “I told my father I wanted to be alerted as soon as he knew when Richard was going to arrive or did arrive.”

“F-forgive me, Master Klaude,” the servant stammered, wilting under his harsh glare. “Lord Goldsborough asked that no one tell you nor Ezekiel until after he finished speaking with Prince Silvers and his companion.”

“His companion? Is Elizabeth Valentine not here?”

His brother looked upset, standing and bringing his hands to his chest. “Elizabeth didn’t come with Prince Silvers?”

“Please don’t be upset, Master Ezekiel. I’m sorry, Master Klaude… I don’t know who his companion is.”

“Is it Princess Ronella?” There was no one else Richard would come alone with.

“N-no! It’s not a princess. It’s a woman with strange eyes.”

Ezekiel sighed in relief while Klaude was briefly confused. “It is Elizabeth, then. Thank goodness,” his brother said with a smile.

Klaude ignored Ezekiel and demanded of the servant, “Why did my father order such a thing?”

“Lord Goldsborough didn’t say. But he looked quite unhappy, Master Klaude.”

He scoffed. “Of course Father is unhappy. I’m also unhappy about the current state of things.” Ezekiel rolled his eyes and Klaude grit his teeth, turning his sharp glare towards his brother. There was no way he would ever admit that he was anxious to see Richard and upset that their father was trying to keep them apart. I’m certainly not upset! Klaude thought. It was the principle of things. It was rude of his father to deny his future son-in-law and daughter-in-law the chance to see their fiancés after their long travel just to be with them. He turned back to the servant. “But that’s no reason to keep Richard and Elizabeth Valentine away from us. Where are they?” he asked.

Gulping, the servant told them where their father and their guests were. Klaude grabbed Ezekiel’s arm and dragged him along.

Richard was considering faking illness to get out of discussing wedding decorations with Lord Goldsborough. It wouldn’t be hard to fake a cough and act like he was trying to hide being in pain. He was sure Elizabeth would freak out and convince the nobleman, and he could ask for privacy while Elizabeth gave him some excess magic, then explain to the woman that he was just pretending. It would probably work, provided that Klaude had told his father about his illness. He was sure that at least Ezekiel would have mentioned it. After all, the only reason why Elizabeth hadn’t stayed with her boyfriend through his pregnancy so far was that she was in the Silvers kingdom helping him and his father recover from the major spell they had cast. Or in Richard’s case, was still casting.

As Lord Goldsborough droned on and on about what traditional Merlynd weddings had, Richard wondered if Ezekiel was upset with him for keeping Elizabeth in the Silvers Kingdom for so long. Even though she had greatly helped Richard’s father and saved Richard’s life, he thought the young mage might still resent him a bit.

Ezekiel could hate him, for all Richard cared. He was glad to no longer be dying, and relished being able to get through the night without choking on blood from a decaying throat and that he was able to eat with far less pain.

“Another thing, Prince Silvers,” Lord Goldsborough started, and Richard got ready to start coughing.

Neither of them could continue though, as a raised and angry voice barked, “Father! I told you I wanted to be there to greet Prince Silvers and Elizabeth Valentine!”

Richard snapped his head around to see Klaude pulling his brother by the arm towards the doorway. A servant was walking alongside them, worried. But Richard’s focus went straight to Klaude.

“What are you doing here, sons? I told the servants I wanted to speak privately to our guests-”

“Thank you for this blessing, my Goddess,” Richard clasped his hands together and prayed quietly. He could hardly believe his eyes.

While he’d expected Klaude to have a heavy belly and a somewhat swollen chest, he’d been using the average expectant person as a basis for his mental picture of what he imagined Klaude to look like. With Klaude being so tall and broad, he’d also imagined that while his almost due belly would be large, it wouldn’t be as prominent as it would be on a smaller, slimmer person.

Klaude, in a sweater that clung to his figure and fought to keep him covered, was huge. He waddled towards the doorway slowly, a hand hooked under his massive belly that was in no way only carrying one child. He was expecting at least hefty twins. And not only was he clearly carrying twins, but it was obvious Klaude had been indulging in more than the occasional craving for sweets that he’d complained about. He’d filled out wonderfully, all curves where he’d once been simply muscular. His overstretched clothing left nothing to the imagination.

“How could you forbid the servants from letting us even know that our fiancés had arrived? It’s not very discreet of you-”

Ezekiel waved to Elizabeth, a shy smile on his face. Elizabeth waved back.

Richard swallowed hard, drinking in how gorgeous Klaude looked. His blond hair was thick and shiny, longer than Klaude usually kept it, allowing it to look fluffier than it used to. His hips, already what Richard had teased were perfectly child-bearing size, had widened, and his ass and thighs had grown with them. He didn’t let himself think too long about what his fiancé would look like stripped naked, flushed and full and no doubt covered in stretchmarks- Richard didn’t think he could take it. It was a fight not to open his mouth and say something stupid.

“My great Goddess…” Richard murmured, seeing how Klaude’s broad pecs that had started softening six months ago had grown into a proper pair of breasts. Klaude had hated when he tried to get his mouth on them before he’d really started producing milk. Richard had a feeling the next few days were either going to be absolutely thrilling or incredibly annoying to Klaude once he got his hands on him in a private room.

He spared a look at Ezekiel. As he’d imagined, the young man sported a normal eight months pregnant belly, which stuck out obviously on his thin frame. He’d filled out somewhat, now looking healthy instead of underweight, and there was more color to his face. Elizabeth was sure to be happy, at least.

Richard looked back at Klaude. As he argued with his father, his sweater rode up a bit. He was wearing something underneath, but it still made Richard feel like he was going to burst. He grabbed Elizabeth’s arm before he could explode and make Klaude hate him. “Elizabeth,” he hissed, “-Though I was teasing you before, I really just wanted to spend time with Klaude, not immediately get my hands on him, by the Divine, Klaude is so enormous and sexy. Don’t let me say something vulgar to him.”

“Uh… um, well, don’t say that to him? Goodness, he is very big, though. It might upset him.”

“Elizabeth. I’m going to die when I get my hands on him. I’m going to die if we don’t find a private room soon so I can make up for not being around to see him transform into the divine being he is now.”

She tried half-heartedly to pull away, then sighed. “I wish you wouldn’t say those kinds of things to me. The past six months have been… something else.”

“You’re the only person I can talk to about this.”

“But you sound uncouth,” she whispered back. To herself, she lamented, “I can’t believe I got used to you talking like this when it’s not teasing. I should be embarrassed.”

Teasing! Maybe that would make her understand how he was feeling. “Come on. You know you’re going to fuck Ezekiel as soon as you’re alone.”

She blushed. “We’re saving it for marriage!”

“I don’t understand you Merlynics at all. Klaude and I will be consumed with passion until you or Ezekiel drag us out for the wedding, and then we’ll be back at it until he goes into labor. In true Silvers fashion, I won’t miss a moment of these last few days. Do you think I saw my father at all before his second consort had Ronella?”

“Prince Richard, I don’t want to hear that,” she cried quietly. “Please calm down.”

Klaude had finally gotten to the doorway, but his father was using his whole body to block him, holding onto the doorway with both hands. Seeing his fiancé even closer was maddening. After six months without him, and now this-

Richard squeezed Elizabeth’s arm tight, desperate. “Seeing Klaude so hugely pregnant is without a doubt the most arousing thing I have ever witnessed. I am utterly consumed by him right now. If I don’t get my hands on him soon I am going to be sick. I am being deprived of divinity. Elizabeth-”

“I’m sure Klaude has missed you too, but really, Prince Richard. He’s right there and he’s looking at you, please contain yourself.”

“I might just have to shove you all out of the room and take him right here. I don’t think I can wait.”

“Richard!” Klaude cried. “You are completely disgusting! I can’t believe what I’m hearing!”

Richard’s heart dropped. He turned to look at Klaude, who had paused in trying to get past his father to stand stiff and red-faced. His father looked horrified, standing aside, and Ezekiel was covering his face with his hands.

“Klaude, my love, I-”

His fiancé took a few steps forward. “Shut up! What in the world is wrong with you, saying such- such depraved things in front of my family and Elizabeth?!”

“H-how much did you hear?” It wasn’t so horrible, surely, for Lord Goldsborough and Ezekiel to hear the last bit he’d said about having sex with Klaude in the study.

“You want me to repeat it?!” Klaude snarled, fists clenched at his side. “You’re sick!”

“The, uh, seeing my brother so… hugely pregnant and it being, er, arousing. That,” Ezekiel answered.

Klaude turned to stare at his brother, humiliation on his face. He huffed and hissed, “I can’t believe I actually wanted to see you!” Then, he stormed off as quickly as his pronounced waddling gait allowed, shoving past his father and brother.

“W-wait, Klaude! I’m sorry! You just look so perfect like this!”

“I hate you!” Klaude shouted back, voice cracking, not even turning to look.

Richard tried to get up. “Klaude! Please wait!” Elizabeth grabbed him and pulled him back down before he could take off after Klaude.

“Prince Richard! Don’t make things worse,” she begged. “Take a minute to settle down.”

“Argh!” Richard yelled, slumping against the back of the couch. “I can’t believe I said all that out loud!”

Lord Goldsborough cleared his throat. “Well,” he said awkwardly, “-I’m just going to make the rest of the arrangements on my own. Ezekiel, son, I’ll be in my personal study if you or your brother need me. Prince Silvers, if you require anything, my servants are at your disposal.” With that, the nobleman took off, sighing heavily as he left the room.

Ezekiel watched him go, then turned to Elizabeth with a big smile on his face. “Beth!”

Elizabeth, finally free from Richard’s grasp, got up and hurried up to him. “Zeke! I missed you so much!” She pulled him into a hug, careful not to squeeze his belly. “Are you alright? Have you been handling things okay?”

“I’m doing well. I’ve missed you too, Beth.” His eyes grew wet. “I’m so happy to have you with me again. I loved all your letters, but it wasn’t the same as having you here… I know your work in the Silvers kingdom was very important, but I still wished you were by my side every day.”

“Oh, Zeke… I’m here now! I’m never going to leave you or the baby for so long again. I mean, unless Prince Richard starts dying or something… He’s our friend, I would help him. It wouldn’t take six months again though, now that I know what to do to help him, um…”

“O-oh, yes, of course! Um, it’s nice to see you as well, Prince Silvers,” Ezekiel said to Richard.

The prince sighed. “Just ignore me and keep going with your cute reunion, Ezekiel. Don’t worry.”

“You look upset…”

“I’ll be fine soon once I figure out how to apologize to Klaude. Pretend I’m not here.” Richard waved them off, even though he felt incredibly jealous that Elizabeth got to have such a loving reunion with her fiancé. “Did Elizabeth write to you about how she’d cry sometimes because she worried about you so much?” he prompted.

“Beth…!” Ezekiel looked up at her, eyes filling with tears. He reached up to wipe them. “S-sorry, I’ve been so emotional… Oh, but you really worried so much?”

“Y-yeah, of course!”

Richard buried his face against the couch, pulling a cushion over himself.

After plenty of tears, sweet stories, and lots of hugging and chaste kisses that indeed made Richard rather jealous, Ezekiel and Elizabeth turned their attention to the prince again. Ezekiel peered over the edge of the couch. Richard looked up at him from where he was laying down holding onto a pillow. Seeing Ezekiel looking at him, he thought to himself that he was very lucky to have gotten with Klaude instead of his younger brother. Ezekiel’s cherubic features and timid attitude did nothing for him.

Truly, he and Elizabeth were a perfect match. Of course, he and Klaude were also a perfect match, even if Klaude hated him sometimes.

“Hello, Ezekiel.”

“Have you thought of how to apologize to my brother yet?”

In response, Richard pulled the cushion onto his face. He heard Ezekiel whisper something to Elizabeth.

Then, Ezekiel said, “You know, Klaude has really missed you. He tried to hide it, but he’s told me how much he was looking forward to you coming back, and how worried he was about you and your illness, especially when it got worse. It really scared him.”

Richard pulled the cushion down and sat up. He gave Ezekiel a confused look. “I never told Klaude about my illness getting worse. He knew about me coughing up a little blood before my father and king called me home, but I always said I was doing well in my letters to him. I didn’t want him to worry.”

Elizabeth frowned, tapping her fingers together. “I, uh… mentioned it in my letters to Ezekiel, since I kept him updated on how things were going so we could guess when I’d be coming home.”

Ezekiel rubbed the back of his neck. “And I showed Klaude those letters.”

“Why would you do that?” Richard asked.

“I thought he deserved to know, in case…”

In case he’d taken a turn for the worse. In case he’d died. “Oh.” Richard felt guilty, now that he thought about it. What if he’d ended up like his father, in a coma? His father had woken up after a few weeks and only now thanks to Elizabeth no longer required months of bed rest, but Richard knew in his case if he had ever tried to stop casting his spell or had been forced to, that he would have never woken up. Of course, it was highly unlikely he would have been lucky enough to end up in a coma. If his illness had progressed to the point that he couldn’t cast his spell, he would have most certainly just died. Probably on the spot.

If that had happened, and Ezekiel hadn’t been telling Klaude- if he’d believed that things were always going well like Richard had been assuring in all of his letters, then him dying would have come from nowhere. It would have caused a problem, then, if Ezekiel had known but hadn’t warned his brother.

With Ezekiel telling his brother about all of Elizabeth’s updates, but with his own letters assuring that nothing was wrong, Richard wondered if Klaude had thought things were even worse than they were. If he had someone telling him Klaude was ill, but Klaude saying he wasn’t, he would suspect that Klaude was far more ill than he was being told. And with Klaude knowing that Elizabeth was a bit oblivious at times and not very good at picking up on secrets, and knowing that his brother hated to upset him, it was safe to bet that Klaude had assumed whatever Ezekiel said was at least half as bad as what was really wrong.

“By the Divine…” Richard mumbled. If Klaude had spent the past six months worrying about his health while also dealing with a twin pregnancy by himself, it was no wonder he’d reacted badly to Richard being a fool in front of him. Though it certainly wasn’t his intention, knowing how Klaude took things, his fiancé had most likely thought that he didn’t care about his feelings.

He really needed to work on letting Klaude know he really did love him, and not just physically. It was hard, though, with how excited he got being around him. He made a fool of himself and spoke like he was flirting or started saying outright vulgar things. Even in other matters, his sister and father had scolded him for sounding too sarcastic or playful or being rude.

Well, he couldn’t help that his default was being very happy all the time. Maybe he could annoy Klaude into believing him by repeating that he loved him for more than his body so many times that it would infuriate him.

“Please don’t try to talk things out with my brother by driving him crazy until he screams at you and has no choice but to give up and believe you,” Ezekiel pleaded.

“How did you-”

“Prince Richard, we know you. We’re friends. You’ve done it before. I know it works, but it stresses Klaude out. And Father and Klaude will be very upset if you stress him out too much. Klaude actually wants to have a semi-normal wedding before he gives birth.”

“So try to come up with something else, okay? Klaude is probably stressed out now…” Elizabeth added. “Do you want us to come along as support?”

“If you come along I’ll default to teasing you and Klaude will think I’m not being serious.”

“He knows you’re never serious,” Ezekiel assured. “He gets over it.”

Richard stood up and pouted. “But I want him to know I really am being serious this time!”

Elizabeth came and patted his back. “Give it a good try!”

“I will!” He headed for the door but stopped two steps out of it. He turned to Ezekiel. “Uh, where do you think Klaude is?”

“I’ll take you to his room.”

Ezekiel brought Richard to his brother’s bedroom door and then left with Elizabeth to his own room. Richard knocked on the door and then pushed it open. Klaude never welcomed him into a room, even if he wasn’t upset with him.

“Klaude?” he asked, stepping into the room.

There was a sniffle, and then Klaude answered, “Richard?” The man was sitting on a small sofa placed underneath a window that had its thick curtains drawn. He had a handkerchief in one hand that he was holding up to his tear-stained face. His other hand was on his heavy belly, rubbing circles against it. “What are you doing here?”

Richard forced down his shock at seeing Klaude crying. “I came to apologize for how I acted earlier.”

Klaude scoffed and looked away from him. “Of course.”

“I got too excited. I, uh, didn’t expect to see you… expecting more than one child?”

“I’m carrying twins,” Klaude confirmed. “It was supposed to be a surprise.”

“It was very surprising.” Richard hadn’t expected that from Klaude. The blond wasn’t fond of surprises. He set that aside for later. “I’m sorry I embarrassed and upset you. I was thrilled to see you. I’m very happy to see you again. I missed you a lot.”

“...I missed you as well.” Klaude dabbed at his eyes.

Richard went and sat next to him. With his thumb, he brushed under Klaude’s eyes. Taking Klaude’s other hand, he continued, “And I’m sorry I lied to you in my letters. I should have told you when I was ill.”

Klaude crumpled, fresh tears welling up in his eyes.

Bringing up Klaude’s hand, Richard pressed his lips to it. “I didn’t want to worry you. I didn’t know Elizabeth was telling Ezekiel everything. That he was telling you. I should have been telling you myself, so you knew exactly what was happening.”

“I- I thought you would die. Elizabeth said you might have to stop your magic, but that- And you were gone for so long. When I heard things were settled in the Silvers kingdom, but neither of you mentioned coming back…” Klaude sobbed a bit. “I thought you might not…”

“There was a point where it got so bad my father considered having me break the spell when I couldn’t breathe properly or eat at all, but Elizabeth figured out how to help, and I got better. I’m better than I’ve ever been since my illness first started.” Richard wrapped an arm around Klaude and pulled him close. Klaude rested his head against his chest. “It’s not completely healed, it won’t be unless I can somehow break the spell and sleep again. But Elizabeth healed the damage it caused, and due to reforms I could release a portion of people to lessen the spell, and with Elizabeth’s excess magic, the spell causes far less damage. There’s no more blood, and I can eat without much pain.”

Klaude made a small noise and nodded against him. Richard squeezed his hand.

“I really did miss you. It was lonely, not having you to talk to. Not being able to chip at your shell until you snap at me or I manage to make you laugh. Not being there with you for our children.” He rubbed Klaude’s belly. “I regret that I couldn't be with you for most of the pregnancy.”

“You're here. I was so scared that you wouldn’t come back to me. That's all I’ve wanted.” Klaude’s hand came to rest on top of Richard’s own. Richard kissed the top of his head, closing his eyes and relishing the weight and warmth of Klaude in his arms. It wasn't often that he got to hold him, not with Klaude’s height and usual aversion to affection. And he was enjoying it.

Klaude sighed, relaxing against him. His breathing evened out and slowed. Richard rubbed lazy circles against the side of his belly. He hoped he'd be able to touch him without any layers of clothing in the way, but he didn't want to ruin their moment.

Before he'd left, Klaude rarely wanted to cuddle with him. Now that Richard had him dozing off in his arms, he never wanted him to leave. It was wonderful. He hoped that Klaude would want more affection from then on. Maybe being pregnant and worrying about losing him would make Klaude a bit clingy.

Richard made a mental note to pray for it, and to pray that their children would enjoy extra affection as well. Though he adored Klaude and loved the challenge of breaking through his serious exterior, he wasn't sure if he had the energy to wear at two more Klaudes. While he certainly had the determination to, it might not be matched by what he was physically capable of.

The children were bound to take after him in some way, surely.

Resting his cheek against Klaude’s head, Richard exhaled and thought to himself that he was very thankful to be back with his fiancé after so long. He wasn't sure how he had managed.

He wished he could fall asleep with Klaude, but settling back and keeping his eyes closed was close enough.

Just as he relaxed, Klaude shifted and sat up. Richard opened his eyes to see that Klaude was scrubbing at his face.

“Ugh… I feel like such a mess after I cry,” Klaude grumbled. “I can only imagine how splotchy and awful I look.”

“Oh, it’s not bad,” Richard assured him. Sure, he was a bit splotchy and his eyes were puffy. But that was a given with how pale Klaude was, and Richard didn’t think it looked awful at all. The sight of him so heavily pregnant and having so obviously cried tugged at Richard’s protective instincts and made him feel guilty all over for having scared the other man so much. He wanted to wrap his arms tight around Klaude and smother him, keep him safe and happy all to himself, but let that stay a fantasy.

Instead of making Klaude upset by doing something foolish, Richard pulled out a fresh handkerchief of his own and wiped the last traces of tears from his face. Once Klaude was satisfied that he wasn’t so ‘messy,’ he leaned back against the back of the sofa and spread his legs to make room for his belly. Comfortable, he gave his belly a rub and then pulled up his sweater and the shirt he was wearing underneath it to expose his entire abdomen.

Richard bit his tongue before he could ruin anything by running his mouth again.

Klaude’s belly was flushed pink around the belly button with its tightness and covered with angry stretch marks all over. It was astonishing how Klaude’s abdomen had expanded and his skin stretched to hold their children and his new weight.

Watching Klaude rub his own belly, Richard was frozen. He didn’t want to disturb the blond, make him tug his sweater back down. As he stared, he noticed that Klaude avoided touching his popped belly button. It was probably sensitive, the prince reasoned, with how Klaude’s body seemed to be struggling to contain itself.

Glancing at Richard, Klaude seemed to notice him again and blushed, his hands stilling. “It- it feels nicer, like this.” Richard just nodded, swallowing. Klaude’s face reddened even more, but he lifted his hands and offered, “Do you want to feel-”

His hands were on Klaude before he even finished asking. His belly was warm and firm, and Richard applied just a bit of pressure to see how it felt.

“Mm- j-just be gentle, alright?”

“Will I feel them move?” Richard asked.

“They haven’t been terribly active recently… there’s not much room.”

As if to prove him wrong, Richard felt a shift under his hand and then a kick. “Oh! Hello there, little one.” He leaned forward and rested his head on Klaude’s belly. When he almost immediately felt a hand carding through his hair, he grinned like a fool. To the babies, he said, “I hope Klaude’s been telling you two good things about me. Actually, I hope he’s at least mentioned me. Even if it was just about how worried he was-”

“I was not worried,” Klaude insisted, embarrassed.

There was another shift and kick.

“Even they can tell when you’re lying, Klaude!”

“You’ve got them both riled… “

“They’re just excited to hear me.” He turned his head so he could look up at Klaude. “I’ll try not to excite them too much. Wouldn’t do to get them so excited to meet me that they come out before the wedding.”

“Exactly.” Klaude gave him a glare but then yawned.

Richard sat up. “Tired, love?”

“Always. Your children have been a menace to my sleep schedule. I’ve never taken so many naps in my life.”

Richard pulled Klaude against his chest. “How about a nap with me before dinner, then?”

“Hm, I suppose that would be nice. I’d rather not sleep on this couch, though.”

“To the bed, then.” He helped Klaude up and wrapped an arm around his waist to support him. When Klaude went to pull his sweater down, Richard caught his hand and went, “Ah-ah! I’m not done saying hello to the children just yet. We’re going to keep talking while you get some rest.”

Klaude scoffed. “I’m sure that’s your intention. But… well, just make sure it’s comfortable, my prince, or I won’t be happy when I’m exhausted.”

“I accept your challenge, my lord.”

#mpreg #male pregnancy #original #Silvers - story tag #prince richard silvers #klaude goldsborough #ezekiel goldsborough #elizabeth valentine

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ellynneversweet · 4 years

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⭐️?

In reference to this post, which it took me fucking ages to find again. Thank you! And I’m so sorry for taking so long to reply — I realised that what I wanted to talk about was what I was in the middle of writing, and then I couldn’t find the original post FML.

For my free choice, I’m going to carry on about everything that gets broken (so far) in A Pillar I am of Pride, and why including literal babies as characters in fic is real fucking hard (ie they have next to no character or plot agency), so without further ado, may I present:

Stains and Spills and Smashed Pots, Oh My!

Right, so, Pillar started out as something along the lines of ‘five times the Darcys and the Rushworths had dinner together, and one time they didn’t,’ but because I am bad at sticking to a plan, it evolved into something slightly looser, and then I decided what I really wanted to do was write a something with a very formal and elaborate grammatical structure that was, on the face of it, about a bunch of posh, mostly dignified adults having a series of dull and unpleasant parties, and smuggle in a series of smutty jokes and wink-wink-nudge-nudge moments about which of the characters are getting it on (or failing to) with whom. To that end, everything I can think of gets to be a metaphor, and, by the way, looking back I’m slightly pissed that in the opening scene I missed a trick and wrote the Darcys buttering toast instead of muffins.

So far the list of smashed, stained, and broken items goes:

Item: Mr Darcy’s ornamental orange tree in a chinoiserie pot, and (nearly) his gigantic hallway mirror. Damage: the former is tripped over by Mr Rushworth while blind drunk, and the latter he catches himself on. All of this is scene-setting ‘rich people showing off’ decor, and what this does on a literal level in-fic is aggravate Elizabeth and Darcy, who do not appreciate their stylish, comfortable home being smashed up by an oafish guest. On another level, it’s building on canon!Darcy’s associations with gardens and gardening, being someone who creates and produces within the community. On the jokey metaphor level, orange blossom is associated with marriage, and (smashed) mirrors with bad luck. The Rushworth marriage isn’t going to last, and they’re going to cause some stress to their married neighbours.

Item: Elizabeth’s evening outfit, and probably her dignity. Damage: stained by leaky breasts as a result of startled-awake-and-crying Darcy baby The cherry on top of the ruined evening. Elizabeth spends the evening watching half her guests delving into a previously unknown family feud and in the process accidentally insulting the other half, then finds out her husband is, unexpectedly, completely wasted (along with five other increasingly-less-decorous gentlemen, two of whom are her overnight guests while the others are theoretically responsible for getting their female family home safely after dark in an city and era not known for being particularly safe) and ends up trying to resolve everything in the middle of a wardrobe emergency while comforting a distressed baby. On the metaphorical level, the point is this: everyone’s body is betraying them. The resident drunks are telling, or at least alluding to, deep dark secrets, and generally making smutty jokes, and Elizabeth, who is trying very hard to be Mrs Darcy v1 (dignified society hostess with the mostess) instead ends the evening as Mrs Darcy v2 (frustrated, upset and hormonal young mother).

Item: Mr Bennet’s letter to Elizabeth, in which he probes her opinions on Maria Rushworth and Henry Crawford. Damage: squirted by breastmilk when Darcy toddler picks a fight with Darcy baby during breakfast. This part is where I got stuck for ages. The Rushworths (Mr and Mrs) have seriously offended Elizabeth, who is a champion grudge holder, but she needs to continue to be around them on some level without overtly influencing the overarching Mansfield Park plot, in order for the fic to progress. Maria in particular has insulted Elizabeth’s parenting, so it makes sense to bring the children in. Only problem is: they’re babies. There’s a limit to what you can do with characters who are babies. In this case, they get to be useful metaphoric sounding boards for the actions and beliefs of the adults around them. Elizabeth is in this scene (and the fic more generally) meant to be set up as Maria’s foil. Elizabeth has a successful-by-regency-standards marriage, which means money, respected social status, and production of a (male) heir and spare. That she gets on with her husband is a cool bonus. So, on the metaphoric level, the kids are representative of the key regency gentlewoman KPI: legitimate fertility (and, by extension, legitimate sexual activity). Elizabeth has children, Maria doesn’t (yet), which puts Elizabeth up a peg on the social pole. Also, Mansfield Park is, among other things, heavily focused on siblings fighting with each other and older siblings in particular fucking things up for their younger siblings. The Darcy kids are having a playful wrestle, not trying to destroy each other’s lives and inheritances — the worst that happens is that Darcy baby gets his breakfast interrupted — but it’s a chibi reflection of the Bertram and Crawford siblings arguing with each other. On a jokey level — a bit of stray bodily fluid gets squirted onto a sheet (of paper), and literally stains Maria’s name. It’s crude, but hey.

Item: Broderie Anglaise table runner. Damage: ripped as a result of Darcy toddler playing racetracks on it with a toy horse. The table runner was originally Elizabeth’s sleeve, but that got changed because it didn’t quite flow, scene-structure wise. Darcy toddler is busy practising being a gentleman’s heir, which for a three year old in a century where hotwheels haven’t been invented yet, means playing with a toy horse. This carries on from the previous two incidents, but it basically boils down to Darcy toddler (and absent Darcy baby) being physical, living proof of Elizabeth having a sex life. Ripping a bit of white lace with a miniature Trojan horse is, again, probably a bit crude, but it is meant to reinforce the previous points made about married (prospective) mothers whose bodies conspire to produce proof of just what(/whom) they’re doing.

Item: baby rattle. Damage: Darcy baby throws it out of his pram, and eventually has his toy-chucking privileges taken away by Elizabeth after it gets dropped in something nasty. Small babies like to drop and throw stuff, which, I am assured, is a normal part of child development that works around concepts like figuring out how their hands/gravity work and engaging in trust exercises with their carers. Darcy toddler — Edward — and Darcy baby — Richard — are pretty deliberately named after Elizabeth’s decent, respectable Uncle Gardiner, and Darcy’s witty and sensible bestie/cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam, who got the standard fandom first name this time round. Darcy baby takes after his (wilful) mother. In canon, pre-fic, Elizabeth Bennet, country girl next door, does a fair bit of damage by failing to consider the consequences of her actions. Obviously, at this point, Darcy baby is...a baby...and a toy accidentally thrown into a pile of horse manure is not, say, a ruined housemaid or pile of gambling debts, but grown up Richard Darcy, wealthy and charming second son of a very important family, exists in potentia as the sort of problem young man that turns up over and over again in Austen (George Wickham, Tom Bertram, Henry Crawford etc). His parents, who are all too aware of what it means to let a man in that social position regard himself as untouchable, are making a point of teaching both their sons that their tiny baby actions have tiny baby consequences. Which leads to 6 and 7:

Item: A red ball. Damage: the ball, offered by Mary Crawford after Richard has had his rattle taken away, meets the same muddy fate. This whole scene was structured around Mary getting to say ‘boys will be boys.’ Mary Crawford is a perennial fave of mine, but I do have one problem with her, and that is her blaming Fanny for Henry’s part in ruining Maria’s life. Mary, who has just been asked not to encourage Richard throwing his toys, goes ahead and does just that. She’s been raised with Henry, and it shows — she sees nothing wrong with indulging privileged kids and encouraging thoughtless behaviour. Darcy baby here also serves as a stand-in for his adult namesake, Colonel Fitz, another second son, whom Elizabeth is considering attempting to throw together with Mary. Mary is playful, charming, and fascinating, but possibly not very reliable. And, of course, because the original sin metaphor is inescapable in western culture, the toy she offers in this show of defiance is red, round, and chewable.

Item: Elizabeth’s redingote. Damage: drooled upon by Darcy baby In keeping with the Elizabeth-as-Maria’s foil theme, Elizabeth suffers a (very minor) public disgrace, and her various female companions attempt to address it. Georgiana Darcy suffers an acute case of fremdschamen, and immediately informs Elizabeth of the issue before attempting to fix it but becoming overwhelmed, Anne Wentworth actually does fix it quietly and without a lot of fuss, Julia Bertram is completely ineffectual, and Mary Crawford, after ignoring what was going on right in front of her eyes and letting things progress past where they should have been, tries to cover it up by using the gentleman culprit as a shield, and relying on him to do something he is absolutely not going to do, ie, sit still (Not suggesting that Darcy baby is at fault or malicious — he’s just the unfortunate teething stand-in for Mary’s complicity in adult!brat Henry’s bad behaviour).

#my fic #my writing blather #asks #a pillar i am of pride #for the record all the Darcy children will grow up to be nice and responsible people #they're my OCs I do what I want #maybeindigo

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frankensteined · 5 years

Text

DEPUTY ROXANNE BAILEY (made using this template, edited to add/remove some stuff like body temperature who needs that)

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME: roxanne bailey (no middle name~) PRONUNCIATION: rox-ann bay-lee MEANING: roxanne means “dawn/dawn of day” or “bright, radiant one” (which i did not know until right now!) REASONING: she was named after her father’s baby sister, who passed away when she was four years old (her father had been eight at the time). NICKNAME(S): roxie, rox, deputy/dep, rook/rookie (by the entire hope county sheriff’s department), “kid” (by dutch), shorty (by unexpected bff sharky boshaw, though he, along with most of her allies, tend to stick with “roxie”), brosenkrantz (by hurk jr, after a very intense debate over which of them was brosenkrantz and which was guildenstern), Various Terms Of Endearment from adelaide (but she calls everyone by those names so it doesn’t really count) re: the seeds and how they address her: • jacob’s taken to condescendingly calling her “precious”. as in, he did not take her seriously at first, so her attempts at bravado when they first met were greeted with a patronizing “aw, that’s cute. that’s just...precious.” so now he calls her ‘precious’ instead of ‘deputy’ half the time and she hate hate hates it. • joseph has a way of saying her first name that somehow makes her feel like he’s the one that gave it to her, so she prefers him to use “deputy” as well. it makes her feel too exposed, otherwise. • it doesn’t matter what john calls her; it always sounds like he’s playing with the name like it’s a toy she can’t get back from him. • and faith asked during their first encounter if she could use ‘roxie’ for her “like we’re friends”, so even though that’s just her regular nickname, the way faith uses it always feels a little like a trap. or an invitation. roxie isn’t sure which is worse, especially since she isn’t entirely sure that it isn’t both.

PREFERRED NAME(S): “just...anything but what the seeds call me. or the way they call me. ..you know what i mean.” BIRTH DATE: april 10, 1987 AGE: 31 (circa fc5 time, set in 2018) ZODIAC: aries GENDER: female PRONOUNS: she/her ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: biromantic SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bisexual NATIONALITY: american CURRENT LOCATION: hell hope county, montana LIVING CONDITIONS: UHHHHHH....currently not. awesome??? (”occasionally, i’ll find a house that hasn’t been riddled with bullet holes that i can rest in for a couple of hours? that’s fancy.”) often crashes either in fall’s end or nick rye’s house, but will catch a few hours of sleep at various locations that she’s helped liberate when she’s not in that area. nothing has become a sort of “home” for her yet, though. pretty much, as soon as she finds a place with a working shower she’ll plop down for a bit to recuperate and then moves on. likes to talk/joke about moving into the seed ranch now that it’s out of john’s hands, but also worries that if she does that he’ll harm hudson worse than he already has, out of revenge (so for now it’s just stops there to do laundry and shower and that’s probably pushing her luck enough). TITLE(S): junior dep-yoo-tee with the hope county sheriff’s department

BACKGROUND

BIRTH PLACE: america HOMETOWN: gunnison, colorado SOCIAL CLASS: lower-middle class EDUCATION LEVEL: high school graduate; was attending columbia unversity on a scholarship (studying psychology), but didn’t complete her program FATHER: jameson “jim” bailey -- owner of a local hardware store in gunnison MOTHER: elizabeth “liza” bailey (nee wright) -- high school art/music teacher SIBLING(S): none BIRTH ORDER: only child! CHILDREN: hahahaha no PET(S): she grew up with a bunch of cats and no dogs, though she desperately wanted one. currently, her parents have four cats back home: ginger, roy, caesar, and bunny. in hope county, she has boomer (which is why she got so attached to him so quickly). there’s also cheeseburger and peaches, but they’re....not really pets, exactly (even if she pets them all the time) OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES: lloyd bailey (paternal uncle, lives in missoula, montana), richard bailey (paternal grandfather, lives in flathead county, montana), sarah wright (maternal grandmother, lives in gunnison, colorado) PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: michael lennon; ex-fiance. (he insisted on going by “len” which, now that she’s long out of that relationship, she jokes “should have been my first red flag that we weren’t going to last”. gets roasted pretty regularly by her friends in hope county over it after they find out: “your judgment’s been pretty good so far, but then again: you were gonna marry some dude who wanted people to call him len...so...”, etc) ARRESTS?: nope! PRISON TIME?: ...not unless you could the literal cage that jacob’s kept her in~ DETAILED BACKGROUND:

• her father, jim, was born and raised in flathead county; he was the middle child, with an older brother and a younger sister, but lost his sister to an accident when she was four years old. he and his older brother became inseparable, and on his twenty-first birthday they set off on a roadtrip around the country, just to see what else was out there

• her mother was born out of wedlock to a woman who “found god” after she discovered that she was pregnant and was subsequently abandoned by her lover; liza wright never knew who her father was, as her mother refused to tell her, but she was assured that she was considered a gift, rather than a punishment.

• jim and liza met when the brothers ventured through gunnison while on their trip; initially, it was lloyd who was interested in her, but jim’s soft-hearted demeanor was much more appealing in the face of his brother’s louder presence, and lloyd bowed out graciously. it quickly became a whirlwind romance, but liza called it off once he started talking about just staying in gunnison instead of completing his trip. jim told her he’d be back once he was done, but she didn’t believe him. she should have; he returned that fall, hoping she hadn’t moved on. she hadn’t. they resumed their romance, much to her mother’s displeasure, and were married the following spring (also to her mother’s displeasure)

• jim got work at the local hardware store, while liza began her career of teaching at the local high school. she’d planned on just teaching one subject, but due to a series of administrative mishaps she took on an additional role as the music teacher as well. within a year, though, she discovered that she was pregnant. they hadn’t planned on having kids so soon, but there was no helping it. jim ended up taking over the store, while liza worked until she couldn’t anymore. their daughter was born the next spring; they named her in honor of jim’s baby sister

• roxanne was a healthy, happy baby, but her parents were finally beginning to come down from their whirlwind relationship, and began to worry about money more and more. they did their very best, and they loved their daughter, but roxanne grew up thinking that it was normal that her father was only around for dinner time at 6 pm, and that he was in bed by 8 o’clock. she grew up thinking that it was normal for mothers to stay up late into the night with work, so she’d need to put herself to bed from the earliest age she could. she grew up entertaining herself, but needing to be quiet about it, lest she wake her father, or interrupt her mother’s grading or lesson planning.

• she grew up lonely. roxanne has very vivid memories of sitting on the school steps, watching parents picking up their children one by one, and having to wait until well after everyone else had gone home before one of hers remembered to get her. she remembers being embarrassed as her teachers had to sit and wait with her, and she remembers being in third grade and deciding to try to just walk home on her own; naturally, she got lost, and was found crying on a corner by the sheriff. after he drove her home, arrangements were made for her grandmother to begin picking her up and keeping her at her house until one of her parents were done work

• sarah wright might have disapproved in her daughter’s choice of career, her choice of husband, and her choice in her granddaughter’s name (she had been hoping that liza would have at least given roxanne her name as a middle name!), but she wasn’t a cruel person, and she tried her best to make her home accommodating for her increasingly moody granddaughter. roxie would later go on to recall how her grandmother would refrain from bludgeoning her with “too much church talk”, but she would make comments such as “i’ve been praying for you lately, because i know you aren’t doing it for yourself”, and other such things that would sour her on faith in general, but she shrugs it off by adding “at least i wasn’t alone all the time”. it was her grandmother who suggested she try some sort of physical activity to get her frustrations out, and she enrolled her in dance lessons, which roxanne would stick with for much of her adolescence.

• by middle school, roxanne’s moodiness had given way to real, proper anger. she was angry at her father for always being at work instead of spending time with her. she was angry with her mother for prioritizing other people’s children over her own. she was angry with her teachers for innocent infractions, such as not realizing that casually suggesting that her parents could help her with her homework felt like the equivalent to open mockery to her. eventually, the anger turned into acting out, which eventually landed her in a chair opposite a children’s counselor; here, she’d actually begin to voice these issues, which delivered a much needed wake up call to her parents. they began to seek out ways to better balance their lives, and roxanne began to realize that she rather enjoyed being able to see where her anger was stemming from, and see where it was going. it was her first brush with understanding psychology, and that redirected her focus towards the subject once she hit high school.

• speaking of which, things improved by the time she entered high school. it helped that she was now seeing her mother regularly in school, and she got a part time job as a waitress in the diner across the street from her father’s store so she could see him on his breaks, but beyond that she simply...had a place to put her energy now. more accurately: her goal was to get out of gunnison, and to study psychology. everything else seemed to fall into a strange, but welcome place in the background. her family began taking yearly trips to visit her uncle and grandparents in montana, where they would go hiking and camping, and her uncle would introduce her to bird watching. those trips became some of her fondest memories

• she worked her ass off in high school, academically-speaking, in order to have a shot at a scholarship. her mother’s position definitely helped her to at least get the audience she needed to apply for one, but roxie somehow, miraculously, managed to get one to her top school of choice mostly through her own merit. she left for columbia university, and while she was feeling wildly out of her depth there, she managed to attract a small bunch of (much more well-off) friends who saw her as a “project”. it wasn’t a flattering comparison, but by this point she had come to attach herself to anyone who actively appeared to choose her over others, and so she was inducted into their numbers and it shielded her from getting too in over her head, financially and emotionally

• one member of that social circle was michael lennon, a bio-med student, son of a senator, asked that everyone just refer to him as “len”, who, for reasons she still doesn’t understand, decided that he needed to pursue her. he was far from her type, and she turned him down initially to focus on her classes, but that only increased his interest. despite herself, roxanne was flattered by the attention, even if he was self-important. eventually, they began dating, whereupon he introduced her to things like galas (which she hated), yachts (which she hated), and how to fly his own, personal, two-seater plane (ridiculous...but she kind of enjoyed that). eventually, he asked her to marry him, and, again, for reasons she still doesn’t understand, she accepted his proposal. (...it was because it was the ultimate “i choose you” display. that’s the reason, even if she doesn’t want to acknowledge that)

• back home, her father’s struggles with money only increased, and her mother returned to throwing herself into her work at the school. it became the perfect storm needed for a man by the name of “cal jethrow” to waltz on in and offer jim help, only to turn around and con him out of everything. jim had thought that he was going to expand his business, and that could keep him afloat, but by the time that cal vanished (with his fakey-fake name), he was left with nothing. as soon as roxanne had all the details, she was already on a flight back home. her parents had told her not to return, but she ignored them. len had told her not to go, but she ignored him. her return home was bittersweet, but she was in a better position than any of them were to dig her heels in and try to help her parents back on their feet

• len told her that if she stayed, their engagement was off. with a detachment that really should have tipped her off to how little she actually loved him, roxie replied “then it’s off.” he then went on and told her to hold onto the ring “for when she came back around” (because he’s a jackass). she turned around and pawned it as soon as she got off the phone with him, so her father could keep the store running for the next month. with her life firmly turned on its head, she began looking for work that would help her help her parents, and found herself facing that same sheriff that had helped her all those years ago. she was trained up, and joined the ranks of the sheriff’s department as soon as possible.

• eventually, financial matters smoothed, somewhat, but issues between jim and liza only worsened. their relationship, which had never exactly been on anything other than shaky legs to begin with, had been strained to the point of fraying. they were forced to admit that they were struggling during another trip to montana, after jim’s mother’s passing, and roxie, attempting to keep her own anger in check, asked them what she could do to help beyond what she’d already done for them. they admitted that they were blaming themselves, and each other, for her returning home, so she suggested that she just stay in montana, with her uncle lloyd, for a while in order to give them space to figure their own shit out (direct quote). so, that’s what she did.

• her uncle was (self-appointedly) tasked with helping her find a job in montana, initially in missoula, where he lived, but he heard from an old friend, earl whitehorse, out in hope county, that he was looking for a new deputy. lloyd and his niece debated the position, with him filling her in on hope county’s history, and the cult that was operating within it, framing it as nothing she couldn’t handle, given her psychology background. “you think i can, what, deprogram people in a cult?” she asked. “christ, no! you just won’t get scared from it, is all i’m sayin’! anyways, those seeds are keeping to themselves, so i hear. you probably won’t even see them very often. it’ll be breaking up barfights and handling domestics, just like you’re used to!” she considered her uncle’s sales pitch. “alright,” she shrugged. “give your buddy a call. what’s the worst that can happen?”

• freshly relocated to hope county, roxie found herself immediately taking a liking to sheriff whitehorse, as well a fellow deputies joey hudson and staci pratt. they welcomed her with genuine warmth, taking it upon themselves to give her rides to work, as well as good-natured hazing (referring to her exclusively as “rook” when it wasn’t just ‘rookie’, and teasing her when she decided to wear the nickname as a badge of honor, since she already was a bit of a dork as far as bird knowledge went). by the time us marshal cameron burke appeared, tasking them all to accompany him in his arrest of joseph seed, pratt and hudson had delivered her one last prank: they’d had her uniform shirt ordered with the name “rook” on it instead of “bailey”. roxie found it hilarious, but nancy, the dispatcher, assured her that she’d already placed a new order for a proper uniform shirt for her. roxie dramatically thanked her for being the only person to have her back. (*sad trombone noises*)

• on the way over to the compound, while on the helicopter, roxie was checking her phone for the briefest of refreshers on the project at eden’s gate. her mother attempted to call her, but she dismissed it, intending to call back later than night, after the arrest was done and they’d all gone home.

• and. well. ....here we are. (note: at the time that i’m writing this, roxie’s sitting just shy of full resistance points in all three territories, but she’s yet to confront any of the heralds in their final encounters yet. so, that’s where i’ll be imagining her at for the most part, because it’s a fun dynamic to be playing around with, in terms of her relationships with all the other characters)

OCCUPATION & INCOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME: does “deputy with the HCSD” even mean anything anymore? she isn’t exactly getting paid right now... SECONDARY SOURCE OF INCOME: ummm...selling pelts? TERTIARY SOURCE(S) OF INCOME: UMMM....looting peggies? APPROXIMATE AMOUNT PER YEAR: $Who, cares, about, money, right, now. ?? CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THERE OF)?: “...y’know...i think my job could be better these days...” PAST JOB(S): waitress, deputy with the gunnison county sheriff department SPENDING HABITS: she’s actually always been pretty frugal, but given her current situation she’s more willing to part with funds for the sake of better supplies (or clothing). mostly, her response has been “why are you making me pay for this when i’m helping--no. you know what? fine. just give me the keys to the helicopter.” (Capitalism Never Sleeps, roxanne) MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION: a necklace with a gold wishbone pendant; her mother gave it to her when she was leaving for university, “for luck”. it has since absolutely gone missing thanks to the nightmare that is her current life in hope county, but she doesn’t know when she lost it. could have been when john had her in his bunker and he was prepping her for confession. could have been when she was being dragged into a cage at jacob’s behest. could have been while she was wandering around in some bliss-fueled hallucination. she doesn’t know, it does upset her, and, yes, she’s taking it as a sign that her luck’s running out.

SKILLS & ABILITIES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH: 7/10 (she’s stronger than she looks and has decent enough upper arm strength to pull herself up ledges and ropes without struggling, but she’s also not going to win any brawls unless she ends up with an unexpected advantage) OFFENSE: 6/10 (knows how to fight, But Would Prefer Not To) DEFENSE: 8/10 (knows how to defend herself And Prefers That Very Much Actually) SPEED: 8/10 (outruns a lot of chosen in their helicopters. pisses them off. pisses the seeds off. feels good. ♥) INTELLIGENCE: 7/10 (she was a good student and has a good enough head on her shoulders, but generally isn’t too above average outside of her preferred interests) ACCURACY: depends on her condition 8/10 (generally, pretty good! she hates it!) AGILITY: 8/10 (can successfully walk in a straight line and run without tripping, can dance well, but has also slipped off a dock and fallen into the water while trying to be sneaky, so...) STAMINA: 5/10 (running on fumes most of the time these days, but still does just enough to keep going!) TEAMWORK: 9/10 (she prefers to work with others! the only times that she tries to go it alone is either if she thinks a situation is going to be too dangerous for them, or if she’s experienced something especially upsetting. she can quickly get called out of that funk by someone simply reaching out to her, however, so all in all she’s a really good team player) TALENTS: ignoring the practical skills she is honing during this ordeal (ie: picking locks), she has a stupid amount of knowledge about birds and how to get by in the woods, thanks to her uncle. she’s also a fairly skilled dancer (she was absolutely That Person who went out to clubs to actually just dance when she was in university), but generally just prefers to dance like an idiot to relieve stress. she’s a little bit crafty, too, thanks to her mother’s background in the arts, but her talents are limited to making non-fancy jewelry (though she will friendship bracelet the hell out of someone if given the chance) SHORTCOMINGS: not so great with melee weapons/hand to hand sorts of situations and has been knocked on her ass too many times to count. she’s also not super wild on heights, so every time she needs to climb something high her heart’s firmly lodged in her throat. LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN: english is the only language she speaks fluently, alas DRIVE?: she’s a great driver! [footage not found] JUMP-STAR A CAR?: she can get it eventually, but definitely not on the first try. luckily, she travels with much more competent car-lifters :’) CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?: if she has to but there are so many abandoned vehicles everywhere is it really worth it when you can just take a new one? RIDE A BICYCLE?: yes! SWIM?: yep, and she’s had to do a lot of it lately, unfortunately. she’s always in need of dry socks :( PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?: her mom tried to get her into playing instruments when she was younger, and she can pluck away at guitars well enough, but she never stuck with anything long enough to get really good at it PLAY CHESS?: hahahahahahaha no. BRAID HAIR?: yeah, but she can’t remember the last time she’s braided anyone’s hair (including her own) TIE A TIE?: yep! PICK A LOCK?: heck yes that was the second or third perk i unlocked for her

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM: krysten ritter EYE COLOR: hazel HAIR COLOR: black HAIR TYPE/STYLE: shoulder length, straight. ties it back when it’s hot out. GLASSES/CONTACTS?: thankfully unneeded (though she will wear sunglasses if she finds a cool pair) DOMINANT HAND: right handed HEIGHT: 5′9″ WEIGHT: 130 lbs BUILD: slight EXERCISE HABITS: running and hiding and climbing and crouching and swimming and absolutely none of it is done for fun :) SKIN TONE: fair TATTOOS: none yet PEIRCINGS: she has her ears pierced once in each ear, but nothing more fun than that MARKS/SCARS: she’s absolutely covered in scars across her torso/arms/back/legs these days (or, if they aren’t scars already, they’re definitely going to be once they’ve healed up properly!). by far her most concerning scar is the one on her neck that came from a wolf attack, uncomfortably close to a spot that’d have been pretty fatal if she’d been less fortunate. she’s also got a burn scar on her upper left arm thanks to being too close to sharky being sharky (she doesn’t blame him, though. honest accident!) USUAL EXPRESSION: lately it’s been like this when it comes to seeing what an epic shitstorm she’s landed herself in, but prior to this she was much more relaxed and oftentimes open, if not downright playful, with others. that side still shines through when she’s with her friends in hope county, but it’s getting harder and harder to feel that way the worse and worse it gets. still, she’s trying to keep it together. CLOTHING STYLE: currently she’s stomping around in a tank top, jeans, combat boots, and a hat on, but even before coming here she was always a pretty basic jeans/t-shirt type of person. doesn’t get too attached to clothing these days, because it always gets damaged if not literally torn off her JEWELRY: the aforementioned necklace that’s gone missing, as well as some larger rings that she’s found in abandoned houses throughout the county that she keeps on to add extra insult to any punch she might need to deliver. ALLERGIES: n/a DIET: ironically, she eats fresher food now than she did before coming here. her current diet mostly consists of whatever gets hunted/fished up and whatever canned foods she finds in prepper stashes around the county, though now that the resistance has reclaimed a number of farms she’s been able to enjoy more variety. is gonna storm john’s bunker for a chocolate bar someday, though, seriously PHYSICAL AILMENTS: just...basically perpetually injured at this point. always at least a little Fucked Up

PSYCHOLOGY

JUNG TYPE: i took three different tests to see and in two of them she got the “hero/champion” archetype, so that’s what she is (as much as it pains her) MBTI: ENFP ENNEAGRAM TYPE: six “the skeptic” MORAL ALIGNMENT: neutral good TEMPERAMENT: choleric ELEMENT: fire PRIMARY INTELLIGENCE TYPE: interpersonal/intrapersonal MENTAL CONDITIONS/DISORDERS: she was neglected for much of her early upbringing, and with that came issues involving anger and attachment. while she was in a much healthier place recently, some of those issues are resurfacing as she’s feeling more and more pressure from dealing with This Mess SOCIABILITY: prior to all of this, roxanne was slow to engage with others, but quick to befriend and trust them if they showed her an equal level of enthusiasm towards her. that’s essentially still the case, and she certainly excels when she’s in groups of people, but she’s becoming obviously more withdrawn and jumpy, finding it hard to accept praise or to feel like others are being honest with her when they thank her. but she still thrives off of that validation, so she keeps herself surrounded by other people as often as possible. EMOTIONAL STABILITY: L O L it’s all over the fucking place these days. she has a hard time controlling her anger, but on the flip side she’s also become even more fiercely affectionate and protective towards her friends. some days, she will swallow back every feeling she has, and the next she might end up crying over any little thing. her emotional state is kind of like sharky’s homemade, duct tape reinforced flamethrower: it’s holding together, but you’re always gonna be a little worried that it’s gonna blow up and take out everyone around it under the wrong circumstances. OBSESSION(S): for the sake of keeping sane, she’s 100% thrown herself into collecting the comics and bobbleheads and whatnot that she comes across. sometimes, roxie and her team will search a house that contains nothing but a baseball card for her collection and still consider it a success COMPULSION(S): she’s compelled to...break every tv set she comes across that’s broadcasting something she doesn’t want to see on it :) PHOBIA(S): shockingly, she’s developed an extreme fear of drowning! wonder where that came from. ADDICTION(S): she’s addicted to validation and having people choose her (going all the way back to her childhood, where her parents often did not prioritize her over others, despite their best efforts). this really, really isn’t something that she acknowledges in herself, but it does explain her responses to the accolades the people of hope county throw at her: even though she absolutely doesn’t think she deserves it, it keeps her going. she tells herself it’s because she has to keep going for them, and that’s true(!), but there’s a part of her that is sated in having others validate her. unfortunately, that also subconsciously influences her responses to the focus the cult has on her as well. DRUG USE: recreationally in her youth, but hasn’t done any for some time. (unless you count helping aaron kirby/tweak out once by being his guinea pig) ALCOHOL USE: occasionally; more so when stressed, though she tries to keep a clear head as often as possible. still, if it’s there, she’s gonna drink it. PRONE TO VIOLENCE?: ........guilty.

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE: she’s fairly blunt, but surprisingly playful even now. keeping a sense of glibness to her responses, hopefully, masks just how poorly she’s coping with all of this. it isn’t all a front, though: she does genuinely speak with levity when she’s with her friends, enjoying being able to banter and joke with them, because they bring out the best in her. she used to be much more mouthy towards her enemies, until she saw firsthand how her allies were faring in their clutches. now, she saves those kinds of comments for just the right level of tension. there’s no sense in antagonizing them verbally when they’re in a better position to hurt her friends than she is to save them.

ACCENT: american QUIRKS: • even before coming to hope county, she was someone you could count on to always have gum on her person, and that’s especially true now. she’ll use pieces of gum as a peace offering/extending of an olive branch to people who don’t quite trust her, figuring that even the grumpiest of people can be won over thanks to the promise of fresh breath these days. • she also tends to “ask permission” of her animal companions before doing something dumb or reckless. if cheeseburger didn’t say no, then it’s fine, right? NERVOUS TICKS: fidgeting and picking at her hangnails DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS: • from the beginning, her main drive was to understand herself, which fortunately branched out to understanding others. that’s how she came to understand and make peace with her parents, it’s what made her able to harness her own negative emotions (...usually), and it’s what made her think that she’d fare okay in hope county in the first place. she’s still trying to understand these people, as much as she is trying to survive them. • she also, of course, wants a place to belong to. so much of what she grew up tolerating was in the name of being wanted and appreciated, and whenever she finds that it becomes dear to her, even if it isn’t necessarily a positive thing (ie: frickin’ len). thankfully, the friends she’s made here are quite happy to accept her into their numbers, so she doesn’t need to pull validation from elsewhere (even though...it’s out there, in some twisted form) • also, revenge? vengeance? not a positive goal, but!! it’s in there, simmering! FEARS: she fears so much lately it’s easier to list what she isn’t scared of, but obviously the biggest one is failing everyone that’s counting on her. it’s dying here. it’s her own mind, thanks to jacob. it’s joseph. but also, it’s turkeys, because those assholes are bloodthirsty. POSITIVE TRAITS: roxie is loyal to a fault, and absolutely fails any attempt she makes to turn her back on someone that she could help. she’s genuinely affectionate with her friends, and enjoys having inside jokes and opportunities to be silly with the people who like having her around, which, all in all, makes her a really good friend. she grew up without many of those, so she tries to be better than what she started with. NEGATIVE TRAITS: roxie’s prone to flashes of anger and tends to hold grudges because of it. it makes her somewhat vengeful (part of why she leaned toward law enforcement was because she liked to imagine taking down the guy who conned her dad), which can sometimes make her take risks she really shouldn’t. she has a stubborn streak that borders on foolishness at times, and that makes her unable to just walk away when it would be better for everyone involved. she also does not handle loneliness well at all.

also she’s been turned into a brainwashed attack dog whenever jacob plays his gd song SENSE OF HUMOR: her own brand of humor is pretty dry/sarcastic/it’s-a-defense-mechanism, but in the right company she’ll lean into being silly/absurd and goofing off a fair bit (traveling with sharky and hurk together really brings that side out the most often, though nick and adelaide can get that too. she at least tries to be more serious with grace and jess, but between the three of them she’s probably the most likely to goof off). roxie does find sharky and hurk’s nonsense genuinely hilarious about....85% of the time, and although adelaide’s style doesn’t match her own at all, it still cracks her up a lot of the time as well (in an incredulous way). DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?: only when stressed :) which :) i mean... :) :) :)

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY: dancing ♥ ANIMAL: birds (except turkeys. she knew true betrayal when a wild turkey first attacked her) BEVERAGE: no one believes her when she says this, but it’s really just any herbal tea! COLOR: the kind of deep orange you associate with autumn FOOD: blueberries! she likes blueberry flavoured anything. (least favourite: peas) FLOWER: peonies (least favourite is.....bliss flowers. obviously. but also roses, because she associates them with cheap apologies) GEM: citrine HOLIDAY: halloween! (all about that fall aesthetic) MODE OF TRANSPORTATION: cars, though she’s getting less rammy with big fuckoff trucks in hope county :) (least favourite is probably the quad because she. tends to crash them.) MOVIE: the wizard of oz (least favourite: moulin rouge, entirely because of “el tango de roxanne”. or, more specifically, how it influenced people to say her name for like five years after the movie came out) SCENERY: as shitty as her situation is, montana really is beautiful, and she appreciates a lot of the natural sights around when she’s moving from place to place SCENT: fresh laundry is always a good one, but she’ll be the first person to admit that a really nice cologne or perfume will turn her head quickly. it’s a weakness. (least favourite is....uh. the smell of burning bodies, which wasn’t something she’d ever expect to have firsthand experience with, but here we are.) SPORTS TEAM: “uh....go cougars?” WEATHER: the kind you get right before a storm is rolling in, though she’s also fond of a good ol’ thunderstorm as well. (least favourite is snowy anything. she does not enjoy winter) VACATION DESTINATION: ironically, it used to be camping in montana. now it’d be...literally anywhere but here.

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM: being able to see her parents again GREATEST FEAR: “i just don’t want to die here.” MOST AT EASE WHEN: she’s taken to setting some time aside for herself to play with boomer, or to lounge against cheeseburger when there’s some precious downtime. sometimes peaches will come lay across her lap then, too, and there’s something really reassuring about having these apex predators just relaxing with her, knowing that they’ll keep her safe. also, the jukebox at the spread eagle often gets hijacked after really stressful days, and being able to dance for a bit without worrying about an airstrike or something interrupting does wonders for putting her at ease. sometimes, her friends will put the music on for her and force her to dance with them when she’s in an especially bad funk, and it’s hard to really stay up in her own head when she sees them go to that much trouble for her sake ♥ worth noting: most of this dancing is not, strictly speaking, good, but it is ridiculous and fun. (and that’s valid!) LEAST AT EASE WHEN: joseph seed is making very intense eye contact with her (which is the only way he seems to make eye contact with anybody, in his defense) WORST POSSIBLE THING THAT COULD HAPPEN: she literally can’t think of anything at this point that could make things worse for her, save a literal, actual apocalypse hahaha :( BIGGEST ACHIEVEMENT: retaking the hope county jail and saving sheriff whitehorse. having him back has been the first real sense of normalcy to return to her life, and was the push she needed to press on towards trying to locate and rescue hudson and pratt. BIGGEST REGRET: ...failing thus far to save either hudson or pratt. in joey’s case, roxie can sort of forgive herself, because she wasn’t in the absolute best position to be able to rescue her, but having been so close to her that she could see the tear tracks on her cheeks while john was wheeling her out of the room still weighs on roxie even now. she can’t stop to think about what she left hudson to deal with in there without feeling sick. in staci’s case, the feelings of regret and guilt are even worse because they’d come so close to being able to escape jacob together, but it was never enough. pratt had saved her, and he was left behind to suffer for it. she’s taken to smashing every tv she comes across that’s looping that video of him being left to die. MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT: probably this moment when she first met hurk. it was a Class Act. BIGGEST SECRET: the seeds get to her. they’re in her head, she can’t shake certain things that each of them have said to her, and it all really boils down to the fact that a part of her -not even a part that she wants to recognize or acknowledge - thrills at the attention they have fixed on her. that part of her that yearns to be a priority is grateful, in a twisted way, that she’s apparently worth more than just a bullet in the head to them. that’s the part of her that’s keeping her skirting between territories, rather than just finishing it with the heralds one by one. roxie doesn’t accept that that’s what’s happening to her, but if she’d just stop to really think about it...she’d see that it’s true. • despite the warnings, she can’t help but...wonder if maybe faith is actually sincere but has been manipulated. if maybe she could be reasoned with. she doubts it, but roxie has to admit that hearing faith’s accusatory “i thought you were different!” made her feel. well. bad. (roxie’s totally wrong about her, and she’s been warned against faith by loads of people, but. oops.) • she isn’t....not attracted to john. like. aesthetically. it’d be an absolutely terrible idea, she would hate herself if it happened, and she loudly rejected both sharky and adelaide’s observations on their dynamic, so she’s not even thinking about it, but. ...well, anyway. that’s one of those take-it-to-the-grave secrets so shh • out of all of them, despite what everyone else has done to her, the one that’s gotten to the her the most, the one that scares her the most, the one that’s seen through her the most, is joseph

TOP PRIORITIES: “stay alive, save my team, save my friends, save the rest of the county, if i can. stay alive some more, finish this, then sleep, for a long, long time.”

#deputy: roxanne #court vs far cry 5 #my characters #profile: roxie

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