#and then I took garrus with me to fight the final boss | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ezrisdax-archive · 3 years

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sweet

because @omegastation said “and now i crave a "friends & family find them so cute" fic” well here I am... (also here on ao3)

“Keelah, they’re doing it again.” Tali said from where she sat in the mess hall, her helmet resting in one hand and her elbow on the table.

In front of them in the kitchen Kaidan was slicing some kind of meat, Ashley at his side laughing about something.

“Are all humans this bad?” Garrus asked, glancing over at James for some kind of confirmation.

“Nah,” James said with a shrug, “But didn’t you say that those two have been circling each other since the original Normandy.”

It was mostly only because Garrus shifted his gaze but James saw him and Tali exchange a glance.

“I don’t know if they were worse then.” Tali mused, “They weren’t together yet and it was exhausting watching them find excuses why they couldn’t be.”

“Eventually Wrex got sick of it and told them they both needed to put out and shut up. He really had a way with words.” Garrus’ mandibles shifted in what James recognized as a Turian smile.

“I think he regretted that almost immediately.” Tali said with a snicker. “Because then he had to put up with them being in love for a month before he finally left the ship.”

James grunted his agreement at the sentiment but then leaned back in his chair to cross his arms. “Guess it’s nice though. That Canadian Bacon and Stanza got together.” He watched as Ash stole a sliced vegetable from the bowl in front of them and Kaidan chided her but still leaned in to kiss her. “Gotta take all the wins we can in this war, yeah?”

Tali and Garrus didn’t refute him.

“Speaking of wins, what’s the next betting pool on them, who proposes first?”

“It’s 50 credits to get in and you’ll have to see Joker.” Tali told him.

“Hey if uh those two get married we can say they’re that poetry thing that Stanza likes right? A couplet?”

He didn’t need to see under a Quarian’s mask to tell Tali’s unimpressed stare matched Garrus’.

In the kitchen Kaidan and Ash were still kissing. Wasting valuable cooking time, shame on them, James thought.

Shepard frowned as she watched Ashley go to comfort her sister; it was hard just standing there unable to really do anything concrete.

“Don’t worry, Shep, I’ve got her back.” Kaidan said from next to her but despite his steady tone Shepard the worry and concern coming from him was basically palpable.

Unbidden her lips quirked upwards, “Just her back?” Shepard couldn’t help but tease.

Kaidan’s eyes widened a little before he chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, yeah, all the rest of her too.”

Shepard snickered and clapped him on his shoulder. “Nice to see you two haven’t changed.” She meant that genuinely. She hadn’t been surprised to see the both of them together on Horizon, it’d be nice her old teammates still had each other. Even nicer that now all three of them were back together again and kicking ass in the name of the Spectres. “Ever think you’ll get out of the newlywed phase?”

Kaidan reached up to pat her hand still on his shoulder, “Yeah yeah.” Kaidan grumbled but it was good naturedly.

In front of them Ashley was still hugging her sister and Kaidan shifted automatically when it looked like they were about to part.

Shepard glanced between them, shook her head, and smiled. “You’ve got this.” She said and patted his arm one last time before she left.

Sarah’s vision was a little blurry from the tears as she pulled out of her sister’s embrace. It was good of Ashley to come, it meant a lot that at least she could have one sibling there.

From the corner of her eye she caught someone walking their way and squinted a little. He looked familiar.

It clicked a second later and Sarah dabbed at her eyes to save face a little before Kaidan Alenko appeared before them.

“Hey,” He said softly, his gaze mostly on Ashley but also on her. “I didn’t want to interrupt but you good?” He winced. “What am I saying of course you’re not good, sorry, I didn’t mean-”

“Calm down, Kaidan.” Ashley elbowed him to stop his rambling. “We Williams women are built with sterner stuff.”

His eyes were warm along with the smile he gave Ashley and then he turned to her and cleared his throat. “Major Kaidan Alenko.” He offered her his hand. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Next to him Ashley hid her face in her hand and Sarah for the first time that day let out a little laugh.

“Ash has mentioned you a few times.” Sarah said and shook his hand. “Nice to finally meet you.”

“Wish the circumstances were better. I’m sorry for your loss.”

Sarah tried to blink back the tears in her eyes but nodded her thanks anyway.

“Come on, kiddo,” Ashley said, reaching over to take her hand. “Let’s get something to eat.” She squeezed Sarah’s hand, the ever comforting presence of her older sister made Sarah breathe a little easier.

Kaidan hesitated where he stood and Ashley rolled her eyes. “You can come too, Kaidan, if you behave.”

“When have I not?” Kaidan asked ruefully. “Actually, don’t answer that. I don’t want to know what you’d say.”

Years ago Sarah remembered calling her sister when she was on the original Normandy, saying something about how Kaidan was cute and Ashley should go for it.

He must have really been something for her to ignore all fraternization issues.

She let go of her sisters hand to loop her arm through Kaidan’s. “You should definitely come and tell me all about what my sister’s been up to.”

“Oh no.” Ashley bemoaned from beside her and Kaidan shot her a smirk before turning his attention to Sarah.

“Do I have some stories for you.” Kaidan said and they started to walk.

It wasn’t easy, leaving the memorial behind, Sarah’s heart hurt regardless of the location she found but at least her sister was doing well.

She glanced over at Ashley who was smiling at the back of Kaidan’s head, interjecting every now and then as he told the story.

Love looked good on her sister.

She just hoped Ashley got a happier ending then she did.

“That’s another one for me, Spectre Williams you’re slowing down.” Kaidan yelled out as he tossed a reave at the Cerberus soldier.

“Just giving you time to get on my level, Spectre Alenko.” Ashley shot back and Liara could tell she was grinning under her helmet.

“And here I thought you liked me under you.” Kaidan said, at least right after he said it he looked a little embarrassed.

“Is now really the time?” Liara asked, she tried to keep her voice stern but the laughter spilled into it anyway.

“Disgusting.” Javik huffed from next to her.

“Oh hush.” Liara told him. “They’ve earned it.” She threw out a biotic shield around Ashley before some shots could reach her. “Not that I’m condoning this flirting on the battlefield.”

“Every one’s a critic.” Kaidan said with a sigh.

“They can critique us after we save all their asses.” Ashley said and took out another solider with her shooting.

It took another hour for the fighting to die down and Shepard to return with James and EDI.

Garrus crawled down from the perch he’d scrambled up to to take the sniper shots he needed. Tali collapsed next to Liara, her helmet lolling on Liara’s shoulder.

Across from them Ashley was pressing a cloth against a shot Kaidan had taken that had grazed his neck. Nothing serious thankfully but Liara could see she was worried.

Kaidan’s fingers brushed Ashley’s free hand as she lectured him about dodging.

Liara shook her head. “I suppose they’ll never stop.”

“Data collected from past events suggests it unlikely.” EDI said from beside her, making Liara jump. “Apologies, my stealth protocols are still engaged.”

Liara somehow doubt that was by accident.

“No, EDI, I’ve been friends with them for a while now. They’ll never stop.”

Not that they should have to, Liara thought, but a little less flirting in the middle of a battle would be nice.

Johnson couldn’t explain the huge relief it was to see his commanding officer again. Their squad had been broken up for a while now and while he’d seen a few others, Kaidan had been shipped back to Earth and then apparently swept up with Commander Shepard.

It was really by chance Johnson was on the Citadel at the same time he was.

All though he was clearly interrupting something judging by the hand of the woman Kaidan was holding at the table where he sat.

“Sir!” Johnson snapped a salute.

“Johnson!” Kaidan laughed and stood up to give him a hug. “Glad to see you’re okay. How’s everyone else doing?”

“Depends on the day.” Johnson answered truthfully, no use trying to lie during a war.

Kaidan frowned at that but nodded in understanding.

“You gonna do introductions, Kaidan?” The woman at the table asked, her mouth twitched in amusement.

“Ah, right. Johnson this is Lieutenant Commander Ashley Williams, Ash this is Johnson. He was a part of the biotics squad I’d mentioned.”

Ashley stood up to offer her hand. “Nice to meet you, Johnson.”

“Likewise ma’am,” Johnson began and then paused, “Wait, you’re Ash?”

Kaidan froze.

Ashley’s smile grew wider. “Something familiar about my name?” She looked over at Kaidan. “Talking about me, Alenko?”

Kaidan crossed his arms and cleared his throat. “Maybe a few times.”

Johnson’s gaze bounced between the two.

“Was it a few times?” Ashley asked, raising an eyebrow.

“More than a few ma’am.” Johnson said with a grin of his own now that he knew where this was going.

“Johnson…” Kaidan groaned, scrubbing at his face with his hand.

“He talked about how much he missed you.”

“That’s sweet, Kaidan.” Ashley said, her voice low in a tease.

“Can we talk about something else? Anything else?” Kaidan asked.

“No no, I think we should talk about this.” Ashley snickered.

“So what?” Kaidan threw back, “You didn’t miss me in those months we were separated.”

Her gaze softened. “I did.” Ashley said easily enough. “No one else is as nice a view.”

“Which view are you looking at?” Kaidan lowered his voice and Johnson squirmed a little.

It had been funny but hearing his old boss flirting was just bizarre.

He’d still have to tell the old squad about this though. They’d be dying to hear it.

“Please tell me they’re not always like this.” Miranda said, taking another sip of her glass.

“They are.” Garrus replied.

“And now you get to put up with it too.” Tali said cheerfully and Miranda couldn’t tell if it was the glee that they’d share in the suffering or the alcohol talking.

“Least someone’s getting some.” Jack commented from the bar where she was mixing yet another drink. She grinned widely. “Though I hear Jacob is too.”

“Leave me out of this.” Jacob called out from another room entirely, his hearing apparently impeccable.

“Young love is often loud.” Samara offered softly and when she had joined the conversation Miranda wasn’t certain.

Ashley knocked her head against Kaidan, whispering something to him that had him laughing from where he sat at the poker table. She pointed at one of his cards and he shook his head, leaning over to say something to her this time.

Cortez and James exchanged a glance.

Kasumi flashed briefly in front of them, “You guys are sweet but can you play already?”

“The Kasumi creature is right. I wish this to be over.” Javik said.

“This game or…?” Liara asked, her question open ended.

Javik merely stared at her.

Ashley wrapped her arms around Kaidan, her head resting on her shoulder and Miranda didn’t think it had be a comfortable position given that she was standing but Ashley didn’t seem to care.

Later that evening Miranda pretended not see the two of them stumble into on of the bedrooms, Kaidan pressing a fond kiss against Ashley’s head as they leaned against each other.

“Oh no.” Wrex crossed his arms and gave his best intimidating Krogan stare. “I’m not putting up with this again.”

Around them people buzzed, Earth’s rebellion hub a collection of activity.

“Not putting up with what again?” Kaidan asked but didn’t move his arm from Ashley’s waist.

“I told you two to get your act together years ago.” Wrex scoffed. “You humans don’t live long enough to be this stupid.”

“Wrex let them do it at their own pace.” Shepard said, coming up next to him.

“And see them dodge this for the next ten years? If I hadn’t said anything those two would still be pretending the other wasn’t interested.” Wrex held back another scoff but just barely.

“You are far too invested in our love life, Wrex.” Ashley said drily.

“I’m just the wisest thing here apparently.” Wrex shot back. “So quit acting like you two aren’t doing this forever and mate or whatever it is you humans do.”

“Does he mean mate like sleep together because I think we’re long past that.” Kaidan said, his voice equally as dry as Ashley’s.

Wrex rolled his eyes. “Shepard, translate.”

“Why do I-” Shepard sighed. “I’m guessing he means marriage. But they’ll get there when they get there Wrex.”

“Yeah we don’t want to mess up Joker’s betting pool.” Kaidan said, smirking at them.

“Despite that we already have.”

Shepard paused. “What does that mean.”

Kaidan and Ashley looked at each other and started to laugh.

“Oh?” Wrex’s booming laugh joined the fray, “Guess I was wrong. You two pulled your heads out of your quads after all.”

“Wait.” Shepard said. “You mean…”

“After Horizon.” Kaidan shrugged.

“Don’t worry Shepard, we both agreed we’d redo it with everyone around after we kicked the Reaper’s ass.” Ashley said.

“Also way to read our paperwork.” Kaidan said, his voice the picture of amusement.

“Who proposed.” Shepard demanded. At least she could still win a bet.

“Neither, we just…” Kaidan trailed off.

“Sort of agreed.” Ashley continued.

“No wonder you two are still newlyweds.” Shepard shook her head. “Joker’s not going to be happy to hear about this. I don’t think anyone won then.”

“We’re real broken up about that.” Kaidan said, deadpan.

“I’d say we won.” Ashley dropped her arm around Kaidan’s shoulder.

He tilted his head down to press his forehead against hers. “Yeah, I’d say we did.”

“This is all your fault.” Shepard accused Wrex without much heat.

Wrex sighed. “I miss when I wasn’t involved with any of you.”

“No you don’t.” Shepard, Ashley, and Kaidan all said at once.

“Humans.” Wrex grumbled and walked off.

“I’ll just leave you two to it. Just uh, maybe hold off on telling everyone until I can be there to see their reactions.” She turned to leave to give them some privacy but couldn’t help but glance back.

Kaidan and Ashley were once again too distracted by each other, laughing about some honeymoon joke.

Newlyweds, Shepard thought. At least she already had a wedding present, kicking the Reapers off Earth was bound to score her some points and make it the best one.

#trilogyappreciationweek #wilenko #ashley williams #kaidan alenko #omegastation #rannochs #wilenko fic #I'm actually pretty sure this doesn't make that much sense but I'm throwing it together anyway #beej writes

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smokeybrand · 3 years

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Reap What You Sow

Finally finished Mass Effect Legendary Edition and gearing up for a second run. Before that, though, i wanted to stop and reflect on how well this game holds up, how ell this story is told. I’ve been playing these games since Mass Effect 2 was released on the PS3 over a decade ago and i haven’t regretted even a second of that time spent. I love these games. I loved these titles. And Legendary gave me an opportunity to experience the entire narrative, on one system, with a gorgeous face lift This makes me want Bioware to take another shot at Andromeda because, holy sh*t, can they deliver when they’re not hindered by corporate bullsh*t and it looks like EA is starting to accept that as fact and policy, rather than just the gripes of fans. I love these games and before i get back to it, i wanted to highlight my favorite companions because Mass Effect is nothing without those who run headfirst into the fire with you.

Urdnot Wrex

I hate the first Mass Effect but that’s because i’m a Sony shill so i started wit the best one of the franchise and had to double back. It was a poor experience by comparison but Wrex was f*cking delight. I loved this dude but his time on the throne in 2 and his limited time with the squad in 3 is what that sealed it for me. Uncle Urdnot is a goddamn joy to play with and even more hilarious as an NPC. If you romance Liara, definitely talk to him during the Cure the Genophage mission in 3. You wont regret it.

Aria T’Loak

I’ve been a fan of Aria since the first time she introduced herself in Afterlife. “Don’t f*ck with Aria.” Yeah, she definitely made an impression. Mostly an NPC in the second game, she really came into her in the third. The extended time we spent with her in the Omega DLC was exceptional. I loved that side of her we got to see and, if you play Paragon, you get to see an interesting evolution in her character. Not as dope as getting that awkward kiss at the end but still just as rewarding.

Javik

Good ol’ Prothy the Prothean. I don’t really bring him on missions in 3 but i make sure to check in after every major battle because dude is a f*cking fountain of snark. I do, however, make sure to take him on the Thessia mission because the banter he and Liara have n that temple is very compelling. Their dynamic is one of the highlights in Mass Effect 3 and i absolutely adore that sh*t. It never gets old and it never disappoints. I’ve played this game dozens of times over the years and i have never once deviated from these two, on that mission, since the first time i took them into that battle together. Plus, Javik in the Citadel is a whole ass delight. Make sure to check your bathroom when you wake up the next day. There’s a surprised in there for you!

EDI

EDI is a ray of sunshine in such ire circumstances. Long before she got Eva’s body, EDI was a full member of the Normandy crew. Her banter after becoming unshackled was brilliant in 2 and even more dynamic in 3. Seeing her becoming more and more “alive, over the course of that last title, was a real pleasure and i hated seeing her name on that board at the end. I almost always pick Destruction because that’s the only one where Shepard survives but it’s always a struggle. Me or EDI? My life or Hers? I hate having to make that choice but the time spent with her until that point, is always so much fun.

Urdnot Grunt

Grunt is MY Wrex. He’s the Krogan i was introduced to first and he’s definitely be the one i have the most love toward. I basically raised this dude in-game during 2 and seeing him finally come into his own in 3, is a big moment for those who are as invested in this series as i am. Not only is he an absolute unit on my squad, but the kid is hilarious. Some of the best banter in 3 comes from Grunt and it makes me wish i got to play with him more. Similar to Jack who is definitely going to make an appearance later down this list, you only get fleeting time with him but that time spent hunting Rachni is one of the funniest missions in all of Mass Effect 3.

Miranda Lawson

My darling Cerberus Cheerleader Princess. Miranda is never my first choice on a mission and was, like, my last romance option originally but, upon running threw these titles a decade later, she’s a lot stronger a character than i remember. Seriously, the growth she shows throughout Mass Effect 2 is real and is presented with a proper focus in her driven resolve during her solo mission in 3. Miranda Lawson is one of the most complete, best written characters in the entire franchise and I'm frustrated with myself that it took a whole ass decade to finally see that. Plus, i mean, she got a fat ass, too, so...

Mordin Solus

Listen, I'm going to keep this one short and sweet. Mordin is amazing and if you didn’t feel something when he did what he did in 3, f*ck you.

Kasumi Goto

Oh, Ms. Goto, i do enjoy you so very, very, much. Kasumi is like the mascot of my squad, the ship cat who keeps knocking sh*t of the table. She is an absolute disaster but i still love her anyway. She has some of the best lines in the entire franchise and i dearly missed her snark on my ship in 3. Tat lone mission with the Hanar was not enough time with the galaxy’s best thief but it had to be because Kasumi is nobody’s fool. She was like, “No galactic war with eldritch space horrors for me, sir.” but she made up for it in the Citadel DLC.

Liara T’Soni

Now we’re getting into the meat. Liara is a mainstay in my squad during Mass Effect 3. She is dub overpowered, especially with that Singularity, and i rarely go into a boss fight without it. Beyond her fighting abilities, Liara just has such a sweet relationship with Shepard that spans the entire trilogy. She opted not to be an official part of the team in 2, later taking up the mantle of the Shadow Broker, but more than makes up for that in 3. Liara is a principal character in Mass Effect 3 and her relationship with Shepard in that game, specifically, is fantastic to experience. If you romance her, it’s even more rewarding.

Garrus Vakarian

Garrus is one third of my Death Lineup. He and Tali stay in my squad in 2 and alternate with Liara in 3. Dude is, for lack of a better term, a straight up killer. I’ve only played mShep so i never actually romances Garrus but dude is easily one of the best companions in the entire game. The relation he has with Shepard and the way it develops over those three games, is only topped by one other character and she’s the premier on this list. Garrus is hilarious and a real force in the game but, more than that, he’s arguably Shepards’ best friend and a solid foundation they can rely on as dude shapes the history of an entire galaxy.

Jack

Oh, my darling Jacqueline Night. You were SO close to the top spot on this list and only missed it because you were introduced in the second game. That’s it. Jack is dope, one of the most complete characters in the entire franchise, and definitely a great romance option. I adore this chick for all of the reasons but mostly because of how realized she becomes by the end of 3. Her growth from “Psychotic Biotic” into maternal teacher for a bunch of biotic kids, was a turn i didn’t expect but loved to see. I love Mass Effect 2′s version of Jack, for sure, but her appearance in Mass Effect 3 is head-and-shoulders better than her initial introduction. It hurts we never got to actually got to play with her in an actual fight but her appearances were still outstanding.

Tali’Zorah vas Normandy

Tali is the best f*cking thing about this franchise and I'll fight you to the death over it. Listen, Tali, for me, is best girl, best character, best development, best everything! I adore Tali. She made that first game bearable but really came into her own in the second. By the third, she was the premier supporting character in the entire franchise for me. Literally her and Garrus stay in my party and for good reason. Tali’s romance is so goddamn saccharine that it gave me diabetes but her maturation as that narrative continues is exceptionally written. Being one of two squad mates who has ridden with Shep through the entire trilogy really gives Tali room to grow and it shows. She is the best companion in the game and i almost never leave her behind.

Look, all of the squadmates hold a special place in my heart but these twelve, specifically, always seem to find their way into my onsite shenanigans more often than not. Obviously, just because you didn’t make this list, doesn’t mean you didn’t have your moments and Aria being on here instead of, say, Thane, is not a knock against him at all. Aria was just hilarious and i enjoyed what little time we shared. Everyone on the Normandy is dope and i cannot wait until my next mission to save the galaxy from the Reapers with them. Not Kaidan, though. Never Kaidan. F*ck that guy, specifically.

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crqstalite · 4 years

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lacuna.

(n.) a blank space, a missing part.

for MER 2020. day 7, celebration. set in 2185 [ME2].

She's still groggy as hell when the comm to effectively her new boss shuts off, readjusting her eyes to the dark comm room and rubbing the nonexistent sleep out of her eyes. Sore in a few places (all of them, there wasn't a single place that didn't strain when she moved -- bitterly she wonders who in hell woke her up apparently six months too early, and if they were still alive she was going to smack them to hell and back), and she can't help but gingerly touch the scars on her jaw. It was surreal to both be here, with Cerberus of all people, and to even be alive at all. To have to credit them with bringing her back to life, functional as far as she was concerned, was a little disquieting.

It's her, as much as she knows. Her thoughts still feel like her own. Her memories are all still there, fresh in her mind.

Two years, and twelve days. She can't believe it'd been that long, it felt like a very painful nap from when she'd suffocated in the wreckage of the Normandy, to when she woke up in the lab. Only a few moments before she was thrusted back into the waiting hands of the devil who couldn't let her die. Her first thought had been Joker as she raced around the station avoiding mechs left and right, she knew that the rest of the crew had gotten off the ship before she even reached the cockpit, but she'd been terrified she'd sacrificed her own life only to have one of her friends die on her. Then it'd been the rest of the crew, Liara, Garrus, Wrex, Tali.

Kaidan. To hear the Illusive Man confirm he was still alive gave her some peace of mind among all the unknowns. What he'd say to her new allegiances, she didn't know. But if he was still Alliance, and Anderson was still alive, she could find him. Explain what was going on, bring him back onto the crew. Then do the same with the rest of them, though finding them sounded significantly more difficult than finding a fellow officer.

Two years and twelve days she'd spent on that operating table on the Lazarus Project station, having Cerberus do God knew what to her to bring her back to life. There had to be some serious tech involved, because while Miranda had confirmed that no, she wasn't a cyborg and would still pass as organic, there was no way someone spent four billion credits to bring back a simple soldier who'd probably burned up past recognition on reentry.

742 days of being technically dead, dead as a doorknob really.

Miranda said they'd restored her as is. But something about this body just felt off. Maybe because she'd lost the muscle she once had, making the armor set much heavier than she remembered on her now lithe body. The textures felt weird pressing against her skin, the curls on her head completely gone in favor of her natural hair, short and fluffy and in a style she hadn't worn since basic training all those years ago. Other than the scars on her face, every other one was just...gone. Even the one on the back of her neck from the fight with Saren's corpse was missing, smooth, untouched skin there instead.

Skin grafts, if she had to make a guess. Though, it was so seamless when she'd been able to remove her armor before the mission to Freedom's Progress that she wasn't entirely sure what to believe. Was she still her? That was the real question. Looking into a mirror in the bathroom, the scars glowed red omniously. Organic was what she hoped she was, but that was beginning to look like too much to wish for.

Freedom's Progress was just a big disassociation fest, getting used to the off center weight of the N7 armor (it wasn't like any model she'd seen before, which was to be expected two years after the last time she'd been in armor), the use of apparently thermal clips (the hell were those?) and the fact she didn't have a supply of omni-gel at her disposal anymore (which she relied on when she didn't have Kaidan, Garrus or Tali in her immediate squad). It didn't feel like her body that was taking every shot with wavering accuracy. It didn't feel like her who'd reunited with Tali and helped her with Veetor.

She didn't like 2185 to begin with, and it only kept getting worse. Human colonies, abductions, Cerberus, Collectors. None of it seemed real. Sarcastically she wonders how the galaxy went to shit as soon as she died.

It still felt so weird saying that.

She'd died.

And now the Illusive Man was giving her a ship, which she's assuming is fully kitted, paid for by who knew what funds, and either a very cocky pilot or a very capable one.

The hopeful thought flits across her mind before she even hears his voice from behind her, "Hey, Commander. Just like old times, huh?"

She can't stop the smile that spreads across her expression, feeling relief wash over her body as she turns from the comm station.

Joker.

Of course, it'd be Joker. She doesn't know how it could've been anyone else, and damn well she wouldn't accept anyone else. Except she's not entirely sure how to react, instead walking over to him on unfamiliar legs, "I can't believe it's you, Joker." She says, just a little incredulous as he turns up the stairs, and she follows without another word, taking in the sight. How he's up and walking -- albeit more limping than anything else, but still worlds better than the first time she'd met him, is a question for later. One of the thousands that she figures he can answer better than the Illusive Man, Miranda or Jacob combined.

Shit, she's never been so happy to see her pilot before.

"Look who's talking, I saw you get spaced." He answers sarcastically, though she can hear a smile in his voice, maybe just as happy to see her as she is to see him. It's unsettling to see him in Cerberus colors, yet she's sure he has some funky reason for it. Yet his response is the most familiar thing she's had since she woke up.

Her throat tightens up just thinking about the moments before she'd lost consciousness, choking on the lack of air as the vacuum of the galaxy spun around her in a dizzily pretty array.

She wills the memory away.

"I got very lucky, with a lot of strings attached, unfortunately," She deadpans, feeling one of her knees crack again, the shift of armor scratching through her undersuit. Another Cerberus sigil on the wall sends shivers down her back, "How'd you get here?"

"It all fell apart without you, Commander. Everything you stirred up, the Council wanted gone," He sounds disappointed, and she grits her teeth. Of course they did, they didn't believe her about Saren until it was too late, she wouldn't put it past them to forgo believing her about the Reapers either. To keep their idea of peace instead of acting on the writing on the wall, deciding to paint over it entirely. It was going to get them killed and doom the galaxy, "Team was broken up, records were sealed, and I was grounded. The Alliance took away the only thing that mattered to me. Hell yeah I joined Cerberus."

It was an injustice enough to keep Joker anywhere but on the Normandy. Considering his words, they turn a corner. There's someone else standing at a large bay window as her next question dies in her throat, taking in their appearance. A woman with tanned brown skin, she thinks, staring out into what she thinks is a hangar, dark hair in a ponytail pulled through the back of her hat. She's dressed identically to Joker, and when she hears them talking, she turns her head towards them, arms crossed over her chest.

"Commander," She nods, smiling, "Good to see they finally got you out of that bed, hermana."

It takes her just a second to recognize the slight accent, the way she holds herself. Her green blue eyes boring into her soul from underneath the SR-2 hat. The tiny frame that could still throw a Mako over her head with her biotics if she wanted to. The grin that has a mischief undertone to it.

The other woman barrels into her while Kodelyn holds her arms out for her. Her sister's arms hold her tightly, and she embraces her just as tight back. Afraid to let go, almost. As terrifying as it was to think Cerberus had gotten their grubby hands on her younger sister, she's just glad to see her alive and well. Tears are pooling in her eyes as Citlali mumbles something into her shoulder, before pulling back with a grin, "It's...it's great to see you. Thought Miranda was crazy at first with this whole Lazarus Project thing. Didn't think a word of what she said was possible, still I went anyway because it was you. Damn glad I was wrong."

"I-yeah. Yeah, Lali, I've never been so glad to see you somewhere you don't belong." She says sarcastically, though unable to keep from a small chuckle.

"Hey, I belong just as much as Joker here does," She laughs herself, gently pulling her by the hand over to the hand over to the window, which she assumes is a dark hangar that houses the new ship they'd be using. She has a million questions about how she ended up here, where her parents were, where her brother was, yet she bites her bottom lip to keep from going on a tangent, "Whether I belong here or not is beyond the point, sis. We've got a mission to do, and I'm sure as hell not going to let you do it alone."

"Excuse you, she wasn't going to do it alone whether you were here or not," Joker reminds the sisters of his presence, her sister giving her a look that was half offended, half amused. If she had to take a guess, they'd been here together a while. More questions cropped up, now how Joker was brought on, and then how Miranda managed to convince her sister to come onto what she believes is her new crew. Hopefully because she's not in armor, she won't be on the squad.

"You trust the Illusive Man?" She asks skeptically, turning back to the pilot and raising an eyebrow. Kodelyn didn't trust him as far as she could probably throw him, which probably was rather far. Her sister shrugs.

"I don't trust anyone who makes more than I do," Joker deadpans, and Citlali snickers here, classic Joker, "But they aren't all bad. Saved your life. Let me fly--"

Citlali moves to flicker a light on nearby, "Let us fly."

At the most, that answers her earlier question. If anything, now her sister was living the dream she'd had for years. Just for a mix of all the wrong and right reasons.

"And, there's this." He says, gesturing out to the dark hangar, lights flashing on. They glint off a ship she can't make out just yet, but her eyes widen as she puts the pieces together. The familiar design and hull of the ship, the pattern that jumps out at her once enough lights are on, "They only told us last night."

SR-2 is painted near the cockpit, Cerberus' logo following after it. She's stunned, and for good reason. They built the new Normandy while she was sleeping, and she has more concerns the Alliance might have moles in their company if they got plans for the new version. But her heart still swells seeing it, her smile only growing. Having both one of her friends and her sister by her side, and the Illusive Man's ominous answer to her questions on her squadmates...well she has some hope she'll see them all again.

"It's good to be home, huh Commander?" Joker asks, turning his attention back to her.

"I guess we'll have to give her a name." Kodelyn concludes.

"She's got a name, just a different designation is all," Citlali answers, breaking her immersion in awe by bumping her shoulder, "C'mon. The crew's already on board, plus Miranda will have our heads if we don't leave on time."

This is all crazy, she thinks as they meet Miranda and Jacob at the door, Joker and Citlali going ahead without her. She's given her own Cerberus issue clothes, different than her pilots' and what she assumes is the Captain's version of it. Someone else takes her armor plates from her, and she finds it rather easy to slide the clothes on over her undersuit and change out of it. The new ship is bright, larger than before once she lays eyes on it. Huge even. The cockpit alone has it's upgrades, but the CIC is massive compared to the SR-1's.

It isn't exactly home, she finds. So many different faces wandering around the ship, so many new features that definitely weren't in the plans for the SR-1. Yeoman -- Kelly Chambers is friendly enough, though she's never had her own assistant to file things. Miranda is just as cold as she was when they first met and is apparently her XO now (not her first choice, but at the moment she doesn't have any other choices), Jacob doesn't say much she doesn't already know. Joker is just happy to be back in a Normandy, forget who built it, Citlali more than excited to finally put her schooling to use, hands flying over the controls at a speed that only her senior pilot can match. EDI is a new variable, one Joker doesn't like, one Citlali is wary of. Dr. Chakwas is a happy addition, the older woman was just as glad to see Kodelyn as she was to see her. Pressly was apparently dead, but they hadn't replaced him. Miranda got the XO position Pressly had, Citlali got the navigator duties.

Her cabin is on it's own floor, dubbed the loft by Chambers. There's a fish tank bubbling on one side of the wall, though devoid of any life so far. Fitted with a bed meant more for two, and enough work space for four.

It feels empty. Lonely even as she takes in all her new things scattered across the room.

They've got a mission to Omega, to find a Salarian doctor by the name of Solus. Dossiers for Archangel, who's also on Omega, a Krogan scientist on Korlus, and a criminal on Purgatory. None would be her first choice, but her first request was to get to the Citadel. She needed Alliance and Council allies, and she knew she could rely on Councilor Anderson. En route, they've got about a day until they dock.

While she has some worries about how it was acquired, she's more than happy when she finds nestled among her Cerberus issued belongings is a photo of Kaidan propped up on her desk. She places it back down, grinning like an idiot. He was still alive, not one of her dossiers but that was the only thing not making her want to defect entirely.

It'd be just like old times when she found everyone else. They'd take down the Collectors just as they did Saren, Cerberus or otherwise.

and with that i lead into the main part of eye of the storm, the mostly janky planned shenko fanfiction i was already thinking of two months ago. now given, this story takes place in ME2 (or at least ‘all the stars’ will, thats what this chapter leads into) so it won’t be as much shenko as it will be a retelling of ME2 with a few ocs. citlali is one of them, but johansson and petrakis will be part of it. some side...sort of shakarian? i only say that because brione (petrakis) is shepard in her own universe, but for now i’ll refer to that ship as petrakarian in the eye of the storm universe

now im rambling. im just happy i finished MER week is all. loosely followed the prompts lmao. >:3

#mass effect #mass effect oc #original character #mass effect fanfiction #merweek2020 #mass effect relationship week #eye of the storm #female shepard #original female character #citlali velasquez #joker #jeff moreau #kodee shepard #kodelyn velasquez #oc

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brandyxlynn91 · 5 years

Text

Galaxies Together: Jane's POV pt. 4

As they entered the Noveria port, some guards stopped them and demanded they state their business and relinquish their weapons. I can't believe this Jane thought.

"I'm commander Jane Shepard. I'm here on spectre business and I need my guns." She told them.

"A human spectre? Yeah, right." The guard in front said to her disapprovingly.

"Trust me, you don't wanna do this." Jane replied. "My turian friend here is very trigger happy." She wasn't sure if that was a bluff herself but she hoped he wouldn't open fire. Just then a woman came down and told them she just received word that Jane was telling the truth and to let them through. Finally a sensible person, she thought. Upon asking about Benezia they were told to talk to the chief of the port. Before heading there, she pulled Liara aside to ask if she would be okay with hunting down her mother. She told Jane that she had not spoken to her mother in years and if she was evil, she needed to be stopped. That was enough for her but Garrus pulled her aside.

"Are you sure it's wise to bring her along?" He asked.

"She said she'd help and that's enough for me." She told him. She understood his concern but she believed Liara.

"Well, I- alright. I trust your judgement." He replied. She looked at him in surprise. She didnt expect him to agree so easily.

"Thanks, Garrus." She said.

Upon meeting the chief and asking about Benezia and the facility she was at it became clear he would not grant them access. He gave them a story about a dangerous blizzard and the facility being private. She knew he wasn't worried about their safety, which made her more curious about what's going on with the facility here. His assistant stopped her and requested they meet at the hotel bar. Once there she told them her boss was corrupt and she needed evidence that a turian had against him. The turian told them the evidence was in his office which had been overrun by the chief's thugs. They went to the office where a firefight ensued. During the fight, she saw a guard aim his gun at Garrus and instantly shot him down. She wasn't going to let anyone hurt Garrus. She protected everyone under her command but for some reason she felt compelled to protect him more than usual. She shook off her confusion and grabbed the evidence. After convincing the turian to testify and seeing the salarian arrested they went to the garage. She took out geth on the road as they drove to the facility.

"Whoo! I love these guns!" She shouted as she shot.

After getting the systems back online and getting rid of creatures that looked alot like rachni, they headed further into the facility. They ran into some guards and one introduced himself as captain Ventralis and he told them the place was in lockdown. He wouldn't explain why and told her Benezia was in the hot labs. She felt that something was up and wanted to talk to others first. She helped a doctor procure a cure for an illness before getting to the hot labs. Once there, they ran into a single scientist. He told them about finding a rachni queen in an egg and separating her from her own children to control them only to have them attack the facility. She was not happy about this and told him to do the neutron purge he told her about. Just then, a rachni claw pierced his chest. She shot it down and grabbed the purge code from his body. After activating it, they were ambushed by rachni. On their way towards the elevator, Liara tripped. Jane stopped to help her up and heard the screech of a rachni right behind her then the sound of a shot followed by liquid dripping. It seemed Garrus had shot it before it did any harm to her. This was the guy she wanted to watch her back and he did it well she thought, smiling. Upon exiting the elevator from the hot labs, the captain trained his gun on Jane.

"Sorry, commander. Benezia gave orders to kill you."

"I knew you were hiding something. But at least I know she's here somewhere." She replied before shooting him down while Garrus instantaneously shot down his men as if he knew what she was thinking. They headed towards the last place left. Upon dispatching Benezia's guards, her demeanor changed. She told them that Saren was controlling her mind with his ship, Sovereign. And that it was the real threat. She revealed that Saren sent her here to question the rachni queen about the Mu Relay and conduit. Jane wondered if that had something to do with her visions about the reapers. Benezia then said a few parting words to Liara before turning hostile again. She saw Liara take a few shots at her mother but Jane made sure to get the kill shot. She wasn't about to make Liara deal with killing her own mother, besides she was trained for this. She thought she saw something moving in the confinement chamber and peered in trying to get a good look. She suddenly felt a presence behind her and drew her gun as she turned around to see one of the dead asari staring at her. Just then it spoke revealing itself to be the rachni using her as a vessel. She explained the rachni songs were turned sour by something and pleaded to be allowed to rebuild her children peacefully. It agreed to disappear forever or be destroyed, so Jane released it. Back on the Normandy during conference with everyone, Liara asked about joining minds to see if she could interpret Jane's visions, but everything was still too random to make any sense. She saw Garrus looking confused and realized she hadn't told him about the reapers yet. She asked him to stay behind the others. Kaidan looked worried but she wasn't sure why.

"So back on Eden Prime, I pushed Kaidan out of harm's way and the prothean beacon activated. I saw what I could only describe as visions of something called reapers fighting with the protheans then blacked out." She told him. She didn't want it to seem like she was hiding anything.

"Really? I thought reapers were myths?" He replied. Oh no, she thought. He thinks I'm crazy just like the council.

"Yeah, well. It's what I saw. Then I blacked out and woke up in sickbay. That's when we went to tell the council about Saren and I told them about the vision. They didn't initially believe me about him either and that's why I needed evidence. They still don't believe me about the reapers. I mean I know I don't have any solid evidence and I'm just another human to them. I can understand why you don't believe me but I think they have something to do with the relay and conduit Saren is after. Just wanted to let you know." Jane rambled out before turning to walk away. Just then Garrus grabbed her arm.

"No. I believe you. I mean rachni were supposed to be extinct and we just met and released a queen. And you're not just another human. You're a damn good one in my book and I agreed to help you and that's what I'm going to do, Jane." He told her, smiling. She couldn't believe it. He actually believed her and he called her by her first name like he viewed her as a person. She smiled at him, tears of joy almost welling up in her eyes.

"Thank you, Garrus. And I'm here if you need me." She told him. She wanted to hug him but didn't think it was appropriate so she just went on her way.

#garrus vakarian #shakarian #jane shepard #fanfic #mass effect

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dearophelia · 6 years

Text

gonna set your flag on fire (chapter 1)

Thirty years after the war, things are as close to normal as they’ll get. Garrus is the turian councilor and Olivia runs Galactic Affairs, helping the galaxy rebuild. They’ve happily settled into the life they’ve built. Their kids are grown, and out living their own lives.But something goes wrong on Nora’s latest mission. Very wrong.

chapter 01: upside down with a perfect view

(read on AO3)

or, guess who’s finally posting norafic, y’all! I’ve only been talking about this for like three years. My eternal gratitude to @nightingaleseeking and @tarysande for cheerleading this project along, you two are angels.

Note that there is a warning for eventual mindfuckery. And, as per usual, a flagrant disregard for canon.

Later, when it’s all over and Nora’s sitting on the back porch of her grandmother’s house watching the sun rise over the lake, she’ll think she should’ve told James she’d take the eezo job.

She’ll sip at her tea, tug the blanket tighter around her shoulders while the cat weaves his way around her legs, and replay that conversation with James a thousand times. The sky will turn from dusky grey to purple to warm oranges and pinks, and she’ll wish she’d accepted his offer – he gave her an out, and she ignored it.

She should’ve taken the eezo job. Instead, she took the Cerberus mission.

Hindsight.

***

7 September 2191 - 23 years earlier

Olivia scrubs a hand over her face as the elevator makes its slow descent to deck three. Eight years since the end of the war, four since they cobbled enough of the relay system back together that the galaxy could begin to function again, and it still feels like they’re fighting: reaper cults keep growing even though they’ve long since found a cure for indoctrination, there’s always an alliance-ending diplomatic crisis somewhere, and they’ve been playing whack-a-mole with stray Cerberus cells for years. It’s nice not to have to dodge banshees and brutes, or worry about the imminent end of the universe, but there are days she would like the galaxy to take care of its own bullshit for an hour so she can take a nap.

This is one of those days. She started out mediating the third day of an argument between Wrex and one of the new dalatrasses about blueprints salarian architects drew up for the Tuchanka rebuilding effort, she ate half her lunch while on a vidcall with Liara listening to intel on banshee worshippers out on the Far Rim (as far as she knows, the other half is still in her office), and spent the next two hours holed up in the AI Core reading a stack of reports while avoiding Cortez and the embedded reporter who won’t leave either of them alone.

She misses Allers.

Their stop at Tereshkova was only long enough to refuel and pick up Abby Williams and whatever recon she found on her latest mission. Olivia loves the Normandy, even more in its third incarnation, but she’s glad she isn’t her captain anymore. Four days back to the Citadel, and then she’s home - at least until the next time the Council decides she’s needed for face-to-face diplomacy. She has three messages from Garrus on her omnitool, and hasn’t had a chance to check them all day.

The elevator doors open and she nods at Ashley, waiting for her.

“It’s a kid,” Ashley says, uncrossing her arms as they fall into step with each other.

“What?”

“The data Abby picked up – it’s a kid. A girl. She was the only one left alive.”

Olivia stops and turns to Ashley. “This is your ship now, but you seriously let a kid from a Cerberus station on board?”

Ashley nods. “It’s not like we didn’t take any precautions.” She points.

The usually-occupied mess area is empty of barely-awake lieutenants and hungry sergeants, replaced instead by a contingent of marines, armed and standing at the ready; four more stand guard inside the medbay. Olivia looks through the medbay windows and sees a small girl sitting inside a sealed glass container set on one of the exam tables. Mass effect field generators clamped to the container’s corners glow faintly blue, and she recognizes the symbol painted on its sides: the container will withstand a ten-ton thermonuclear explosion inside of it. “Fair enough,” she says.

Abby steps out of the medbay. As tall as her older sister, she’s leaner, built for speed instead of Ashley’s muscle. She’s still in her lithe armor, with her sword still strapped to her back. “Captain,” she salutes Olivia, “Commander,” she turns to Ashley.

“At ease, Lieutenant,” Ashley says. “What’s going on?”

Abby exhales heavily. “We got some intel about a Cerberus station orbiting Rayingiri. I went in –”

“Alone?” Ashley asks, ever the older sister.

Silently, Abby points to the N7 on her chest and the two crossed swords beneath it, identifying her Shadow designation. “I went in, just to get recon; Liselle and Rosie were on their way to back me up for the attack. I guess the op was blown somehow: everyone on that station was dead before I got there – suicide. They all had their heads half blown off from that capsule thing in their teeth.”

Olivia grimaces. She’s seen no shortage of grisly scenes, but that’s particularly nasty. “What about the girl?”

“Rosie hacked the station records. Her name’s Nora Milton, three and a half. Father died last year in that raid in the Hades Nexus, mother was an engineer on the station, working on a Cerberus project code named Damocles.”

Olivia’s attention shifts back to the girl in the glass box. She’s tucked herself up into the back corner, as far away from the guards and Doctor Chakwas as she can get, hugging her knees to her chest. “And Damocles is?”

Abby shrugs and shakes her head. “No idea. They wiped most of their servers. All we got was a crew manifest, shipping logs, and some low-security email. Nothing that flagged Alliance intelligence when we ran it past them.”

“Send it to me,” Olivia says. “I know people who may be able to do more with it.” Liara’s had her own troubles getting anything out of the remaining Cerberus cells, but she may have more luck than the Alliance.

Abby nods. “Sure.”

“Thanks, Abby,” Ashley says. She lightly squeezes her sister’s arm before heading toward the medbay doors. She gestures for Olivia to go first.

Doctor Chakwas looks up at the whoosh of the doors and waves the two women over. Olivia pauses to smile at the scared girl, but none of them trust Cerberus not to use a three-year-old girl as a bomb.

“Physically,” Chakwas says as she pulls up a series of scans on her monitor, “she’s mostly normal. Probably dehydrated and a little malnourished, I’ll know more once we get a blood test, but she looks like a perfectly healthy three-year-old human.”

“I hear a but coming,” Ashley says. Olivia nods in agreement.

“And correctly so.” Chakwas taps on the display and it zooms in on the girl’s brain. She points at a tiny square in the middle. “She has a microchip implanted near her cerebrum.”

Olivia’s eyes narrow. “I think we can safely assume that’s not good.” She clenches her jaw as she flashes back to a few uncomfortable conversations with Miranda. Nora’s a toddler. “Can you get it out?”

The doctor shakes her head. “It’s deep in her brain, and she’s very young. Even with the Citadel’s surgical AIs, the risk of brain damage or death are extremely high.”

“How about turning it off?” Ashley suggests.

“EDI’s working on that,” Chakwas says. “She’s also sent the information to Tali.”

Olivia looks over her shoulder. The girl’s still curled up in her corner, but she’s watching the three of them with wide eyes. “Besides the chip,” she turns back to Chakwas, “is there anything else wrong with her? Any indication that she’s going to explode or start some sort of virus...anything?”

“I haven’t been able to check her directly while she’s in the box, but no, not that my scans have shown.”

Olivia looks at Ashley. She’d let Nora out, but the Normandy isn’t her ship anymore, and Doctor Chakwas and the guards outside aren’t her crew. “Your ship, your call.”

Ashley presses her lips together. She looks up at the display screen, to Nora, to Olivia, and back to Nora. “She’s three,” she says, “if the chip does do anything, I think we can take her.” She turns to one of the guards. “Clear the entire deck. In five minutes, we’re opening that box.” He nods and rushes out with the others. She taps her omnitool. “Vega.”

“Yeah, Boss?”

“In five minutes, Shepard and I are opening a container holding a very small child who may or may not be a Cerberus booby trap. I need you to put the ship into lockdown and get ready to quarantine the deck if necessary.”

“Uh, are you sure that’s wise?”

“No,” Ashley says. “But she’s three years old and we can’t keep her in a glass box forever.”

“Lockdown in effect,” he says as a low alarm pulses through the ship, “and Level 4 quarantine on standby.”

A quiet whimper escapes from Nora’s throat and her eyes fill with tears. Olivia taps a command into a nearby medical console, and the alarm silences inside the medbay. Nora sniffles.

“Thanks, Vega.” Ashley ends the call and looks at Olivia. “You want to take this? You’ve actually got kids.”

“They’re eight and ten and turian, Ash. My frame of reference isn’t exactly wider than yours here.” One of the messages from Garrus was a photo. Quentus had his first durak tournament today. She hopes it went well; he was so excited.

“Okay. How about – you’ve actually been a Cerberus experiment before?”

“Does Traynor know you’re this reluctant to be around kids?”

“I’m not,” Ashley says. “Except when they were the only one left alive on a station full of dead people and we’re keeping them in a box built to contain a ten-ton nuke.”

“Wimp.” Olivia grins and steps up to the box. She gives Nora her best reassuring smile.

Ashley checks her watch and, after five minutes have passed, taps her command code into the box’s control panel. It beeps, and the latch unlocks with a hiss. Slowly, and with a low mechanical hum, the top panel retracts.

Nora looks up, eyes even wider. Her lower lip starts to quiver, and she looks straight at Olivia.

“It’s okay,” she tells her, “we’re getting you out of there.”

As soon as the top fully retracts, Ashley and Olivia unlatch the front side, laying it down on the bed, leaving Nora sitting in a three-walled box.

Nora blinks once, twice, and then scrambles to the edge of the bed and wraps her arms around Olivia’s waist. She moves so fast she scrapes her arm on one of the hinges, but she doesn’t seem to notice.

“Oh!” Olivia exclaims. She runs her fingers through the ends of Nora’s tangled brown curls and sets her other hand on her back. Nora presses her face into her stomach. “It’s okay, sweetie,” she whispers.

The entire medbay holds its breath.

“So,” Ashley says after ten minutes have passed without incident. “Not a bomb.”

Olivia shakes her head. Nora hasn’t let go, and so neither has she. “Not a bomb.”

“Any sign of contagion?” Ashley asks Chakwas.

“None.”

Ashley exhales. “It’s nice to be wrong sometimes.”

While Ashley calls Vega and tells him to lift the lockdown and take his finger off the quarantine trigger, Olivia looks down at the small girl still hugging her tight. A thin trail of blood trickles down Nora’s arm from the scrape. Olivia gestures for Chakwas to come over and check her out.

“Can I have your arm, please?” Chakwas asks.

Nora shakes her head and hugs even tighter.

“Nora,” Olivia says quietly, “I need you to let go so the doctor can look at you.” Again, Nora shakes her head. “I’ll be right here. You can sit on my lap.”

After a moment, Nora loosens her arms, but doesn’t let go. Olivia shifts and lifts Nora up, settling her on her hip as she carries her over to another exam table – one without the bomb-proof box on it. She sits Nora on the table and then hops up and crosses her legs underneath her. “Come here,” she says, and Nora scrambles into her lap. Nora settles, pressing her back into Olivia’s chest, and Olivia rests her arms around Nora’s waist.

Chakwas scans the scrape, and then runs a dermal regenerator over her arm. “There we go,” she says.

Nora whimpers, but otherwise doesn’t make a sound.

***

By the time she finally gets to call Garrus, it’s well past two in the morning at home on the Citadel. She at least had a chance to read his messages at dinner: a good morning smiley face, an update on the batarian trade agreement discussions (going about as terribly as she anticipated), Nico’s report card was all top marks, Quentus and his team won and will advance to the next round (sent with a picture of her eldest, pointing at the scoreboard and grinning proudly), and a final message asking if she was okay. She sent him a quick response – crazy day, will call, probably late – thankful for autocorrect, as Nora kept trying to grab her arm and put it back around her.

Nora’s sound asleep in the bed. She was quiet – almost happy – throughout the entire day, through a lengthy round of medical tests, through a half bath/half shower that had Olivia, Abby, and most of the women’s bathroom soaked by the end, and quiet even through Olivia combing out her hair. But the minute Olivia tried to settle her in for the night, tucked in amongst a pile of pillows on a bed in the medbay, Nora started crying. Tears turned to screams when Olivia stepped away and turned off the light.

Olivia took some spare blankets and pillows from the crew quarters, settled Nora into her bed, and made a makeshift bed for herself on the couch. She’s left the door unlocked, a concession to everyone’s paranoia, in case anything happens in the middle of the night and the two guards standing outside need to storm in.

“I wonder why she imprinted on you so hard,” Garrus says, after she’s told him everything.

Though she’s exhausted, Olivia manages a smirk for her husband. “Oh, come on. I’m totally lovable.”

“You are,” his mandibles flutter, “but that’s not what I meant, Shepard.”

Olivia sighs and rests her head in her hands. “I know Cerberus isn’t known for their humanitarianism, but she’s so little, Garrus. Who the hell puts a control chip inside a three-year-old?” The why of it gnaws at her even more.

“Olivia,” he says gently, in a similar voice to the one he uses with their boys when they have a nightmare.

She inhales and looks up. “I’m fine,” she says, though by his lifted brow plate she can tell he doesn’t believe her. She pushes her hair out of her face. “EDI and Tali think they have a way to turn off the chip, so we’re going to try that in the morning. How are the boys?” She wanted to talk to them before they went to bed tonight. She misses them.

“Nico made me promise to actually show you his grades,” Garrus taps on his omnitool, and hers lights up with a new message and an image attachment, “and Quentus scored two goals today.”

Her omnitool lights up again, this time with a video attachment. She opens the picture while the video downloads, and smiles. Nico struggles to make friends in school, but he doesn’t struggle with the academics at all; even at eight, he’s so proud of his grades. She presses play on the video, keeping the volume quiet, and watches proudly as Quentus makes two goals in a row.

“I wanted to be there,” she says wistfully.

“He knows,” Garrus assures her. “And he also knows that sometimes Uncle Wrex needs you in the room to keep him from eating someone.”

“Still,” she sighs. She’s missed games before, they both have, but it was his first tournament. Hopefully his team will stay in after the next round, and she’ll get to see him play when she’s back home.

“Are you on schedule to be home next week?”

“Yes,” she nods. “And if Wrex and the dalatrass haven’t sorted out their differences by then, they can bite me.”

“The ship’s still in one piece after three days. You may not have them drinking tea together, but they’ll come to an agreement.”

“Okay, now I’m just thinking about Wrex with a teacup,” she laughs quietly.

His mandibles flick open in a grin. “Good. Get some sleep, Liv.”

“You too. I’ll call you tomorrow, hopefully a little earlier.”

“Alright. I love you.”

“I love you, too.” She ends the vidcall and her monitor goes dark, leaving the room lit only by stars outside and faint light coming around the half-shut door of the bathroom.

Nora shifts and makes a quiet sleepy huff as her feet gently kick at the blankets.

“I hope this works tomorrow,” Olivia whispers to herself.

***

“Ah, Shepard?” Chakwas says, as EDI finishes her calculations. “You shouldn’t be standing there when they do this.”

Olivia opens her mouth to ask why, but she follows the doctor’s gaze down to her leg. Oh. It’s not that she forgets her right leg is a cybernetic prosthetic now, it’s that it hasn’t bothered her for a few days and she’s had other things on her mind. “Right.” From what she understands, the EMP will be targeted toward Nora’s brain, but it’s still best not to risk it.

“We’re ready, Shepard,” Tali says from the monitor.

She looks down at Nora sitting on the exam table beside her. Nora’s kept her wide eyes on the EMP minigun since EDI set it up. She doesn’t seem scared of it, just staring at something new.

“You ready?” Olivia doubts Nora fully understands what’s about to happen, but she’s not going to give Tali the go ahead if Nora isn’t sure.

Nora looks up at her and blinks.

It’s not a no.

“I’ll be right here,” she says, and takes a few steps away out of range. She nods to Tali and EDI. “Go ahead.”

Tali taps at her controls, transmitting the code to EDI. “All yours,” she says.

EDI nods, and presses a few buttons on the side of the EMP gun. There’s a series of short beeps, and then EDI turns to Olivia and Chakwas. “It’s completed.”

Olivia raises an eyebrow. She’d expected…more. “That’s it?”

“Yes.”

She looks at Nora, who doesn’t look any different. “Did it work?”

Chakwas runs a handheld scanner over Nora’s head, and peers at the results displaying on the bedside manner. “It’s no longer emitting a signal.” She looks over her shoulder at Tali and EDI, both waiting expectantly. “It looks like it worked.”

Olivia nods slowly. “Send a message to Miranda,” she tells EDI, “have her meet us when we dock at the Citadel. It’s not that I don’t trust your work, guys, it’s –”

“That you don’t trust Cerberus wouldn’t put failsafes into place in case anyone tried what we just did,” Tali says.

“Bingo.”

“We can pretend we’re still working, if you want to avoid the dalatrass a little longer,” Tali teases.

Olivia grimaces. “It’s a miracle I haven’t gotten at least five nasty messages from her yet.” She owes Cortez an entire bar’s worth of drinks for keeping the dalatrass at bay this morning.

“Let me know if you need anything else.”

“Will do. Thanks again, Tali.”

“No problem, Shepard.” Her vidcall blinks out.

Olivia turns back to Nora, only to find Chakwas looking at her with a distinctly pointed look. “What?”

“Nora is welcome to stay. But you cannot avoid the dalatrass all day by hiding in here.”

Aware that she sounds like a petulant child, yet not caring in the least, Olivia huffs. She almost misses Linron and Isheel. Almost. “Fine.” She takes a deep breath and turns to Nora. “I’ll be back at the end of the day, okay?”

Nora just blinks.

Olivia supposes if she watched the heads of everyone she knew explode, she wouldn’t talk either. She gently tucks Nora’s hair behind her ear and smiles. “Call me if she needs anything.”

Chakwas nods. “Of course.”

But as soon as Olivia has one foot out the door, Nora sniffles and starts to cry.

Olivia stops in her tracks and walks back to Nora. She can’t avoid the negotiations – she really does need to resolve things between the dalatrass and Wrex – but it looks like she can’t leave Nora, either. Everyone will just have to deal with a small human child sitting at the negotiating table.

***

"What do you think the Alliance will do with her?" Garrus asks later that night, when she sits back down after getting Nora a glass of water and settling her back to bed.

Olivia shrugs. "Run a thousand tests on her," she surmises. "Keep her in a cage, mess with the chip, see what it does." As if Nora needs more time spent in a science lab with people poking her. Sighing heavily, she rests her head in her hands and looks at him through her fingers. "What she needs is a family, but they'll never let her go for proper adoption."

Garrus tilts his head and looks at her softly. "They might if it was us."

She raises her head, blinking at her husband. Her mind started down that same path earlier, but was blocked by a thousand different arguments: physical space, time, busy schedules, two parents wrangling three kids under ten. Their sons.

"Liv, you know they're never going to let a civilian take her. And she already seems attached to you."

Olivia bites her lip and looks away. "I don't want Quentus and Nico to think – I don't know." She's unsure how to voice that concern to him. Both boys have needed a lot from their parents, which she and Garrus have been so willing and happy to give, and she doesn't want them to feel like suddenly they're going to have less. They lost their birth parents to the war; the last thing she wants is for her sons to worry that they're not important anymore, or that she and Garrus are going to leave them too.

"I'll talk to them," he says gently. "See what they think about maybe having a little sister."

"You haven't even met her," she says, though she knows that’s not even remotely a problem. Garrus has always been kind to those important to him, and he's grown impossibly kinder since becoming a father. He's light years away, and that kindness already extends to Nora.

His mandibles flutter. "She likes you," he says. "She clearly has good judgment."

She laughs quietly, a slight heat rising to her cheeks. Almost ten years, and he can still make her blush with a simple compliment. "Dork."

Before Garrus can respond, there's a noise behind him that sounds suspiciously like two young turian boys racing each other down the stairs.

Garrus looks over his shoulder. "Incoming," he confirms.

"Is that Mom?" Nico asks, off camera still.

"Mom, I made two goals today!" Quentus shouts, followed by the scrape of a kitchen chair urgently pushed out of the way.

Olivia scrambles for her earbuds so the excitement doesn't wake up Nora. Within seconds of getting the buds connected and in her ears, Quentus and Nico have both popped their heads up into the camera in front of Garrus. They're a little too close at first and fill the screen completely, competing to take up the most space, until Garrus pushes the monitor back a bit.

"When are you coming home? I miss you."

"Dad let us have ice cream for dinner."

Garrus clears his throat and looks down at his eldest. "We weren’t going to tell her that."

Laughing softly, Olivia smiles at the three most important people in her life. "I miss you guys too," she says. "I'll be home on Friday," she promises. "How was your day?"

As their sons excitedly tell her about their days, she briefly glances over their heads at Garrus. Her eyes lock with his, and he gives her a little nod. Smiling, she focuses her attention on Quentus retelling, in very animated detail, his game-winning goal.

***

Miranda spends a long time in silence, looking at Nora’s scans.

Just when Olivia almost can’t stand the silence anymore, Miranda turns. “It’s a control chip. It’s a different model than I considered using, but it is definitely a control chip.” She steps to the side, gesturing for them to join her at the monitor. “Do you see those thin lines radiating from it?” She points on the screen and as soon as she sees what Miranda’s pointing at, Olivia wonders how she didn’t see the lines before. They’re light, but clear.

“Those are wires connecting to her memory centers. This design was still experimental when I was with Cerberus, evidently they’ve moved it into production.” Miranda looks at Chakwas. “You were correct not to operate. There hasn’t been time for her brain to grow around the chip, but it’s beginning to,” she points to faint shadows. “Given how young she is, surgery will cause permanent damage, and would likely kill her.”

"Then how did they implant it?" Chakwas asks.

Miranda glances back to the monitor. "The wires are grown post-implantation via nanotechnology. It’s likely you could surgically remove the chip itself, but the wires are the problem. Without knowing how they work, I wouldn’t recommend leaving them in there unconnected."

“Does Project Damocles ring a bell?” Olivia asks, before the two women can begin down a conversational black hole about pediatric neurosurgery neither she nor Ashley has half a hope of understanding.

Miranda shakes her head. “Unfortunately, no. Cerberus cells operated mostly independently. I only knew of a small handful of projects other than Lazarus. I’d imagine they’re even more independent now.”

"Any ideas why Cerberus might implant a control chip into a toddler?" Olivia’s been doing her best to ignore that reality, but the question has to be asked.

"Yes," Miranda says. "All of which you’ve probably thought of already, and none of them good."

Olivia shudders. She’s come up with plenty of theories, and they’re all terrifying.

“Okay, I’m just gonna ask,” Ashley says. “Is she safe? Can we let her off the ship?”

Miranda shrugs. “It’s been deactivated. Control chips work in one of two ways: either orders are transmitted directly to it, or there’s a designated controller whose voice activates the chip. Even if you hadn’t deactivated it, the likelihood of anyone knowing she’s alive to receive orders or encounter the controller are monumentally slim.”

Olivia shares a look with Ashley and Chakwas. “Somehow that doesn’t make me feel better.” She swallows. She’s long made her peace with Miranda’s confession, but that doesn’t mean it sits well.

“Well, it’s off,” Miranda says. “It doesn’t matter either way.”

“Her brain is still very young. Surgery isn’t a viable solution, and the chip and wires are microscopic, but I am concerned about the effects of a foreign object on her development,” Chakwas says, staring again at the scan.

Miranda purses her lips and takes a moment before responding. “I know Cerberus hasn’t always had the most responsible scientific practices, and I doubt they’ve improved in the wake of the Illusive Man’s death. Nora may very well be their first attempt, and she may be facing extreme developmental problems. Or, she could be the end of the experimental line and they got it right. Or, they could have perfected it years ago and she could be one of many. There’s no way to know for sure.”

Ashley stares at Miranda and then scoffs. She crosses her arms. “None of those is a comforting thought.”

“No,” Olivia agrees, and looks out the medbay windows. Nora’s sitting next to James at a table in the mess, playing with empty MRE boxes, the closest non-explosive thing to blocks they could find. Nora looks up from her tower and waves at Olivia. Olivia waves back; Nora started to cry when she left her with James to go speak with Miranda, but settled when she realized she could see Olivia through the window. Olivia dreads what happens when they get off the ship – when Nora has to go the Alliance, and she has to go home.

“I think the next question is: what does the Alliance plan to do with her?” Miranda asks.

Olivia exhales slowly. “That is a great question.”

#tarysande #nightingaleseeking #SCREAMS LOUDLY HITS POST #s:words #s:me #s:set your flag #s:2018 #nora vakarian: in any given storm #i'm still working through the end so we're looking at 14/15 chapters; will update that as soon as i figure it out

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transquad · 3 years

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Some notes about killing specific squadmates in Mass Effect 2

Because the specifics of how the Mass Effect 2 suicide mission stuff works are a bit hard to track down, I figured I’d post the results of our experiment yesterday. It’s very easy to find guides on how to keep everyone alive, or even guides on how to kill everyone, but Emily wanted to kill some and keep others alive, which is where it can get tricky if you don’t know the specifics of what determines who dies when.

Most of what we learned is already documented on the wiki (though buried in massive walls of text). The way defensive scores are calculated is not on the wiki, but is documented in this article.

Full details of what we learned below. None of it is brand new information, but a lot of it was news to me, and it might be a bit easier to digest than how the wiki presents it if you’re ever trying to do something similar. Also, this is written with the assumption that the reader already knows how to do the suicide mission the correct way.

Our priority kills were Garrus and Miranda. Secondary were Jacob, Jack, and Thane. Emily was neutral on Morinth, Zaeed, and Kasumi - killing them was worth bonus points. She only actively wanted to keep Tali, Legion, Grunt, and Mordin alive.

Tali, Legion, Grunt, Mordin, Morinth, Zaeed and Kasumi were loyal. Garrus, Miranda, Jacob, Jack and Thane were not.

I manipulated her - her words - into upgrading the shielding to save Kasumi, because I love Kasumi. We left the armor and the cannon as is, however, killing Jack and Thane.

Per the wiki, this is how the game prioritizes the three upgrade deaths:

Heavy Ship Armor: Jack

Multicore Shielding: Kasumi, Legion, Tali, Thane, Garrus, Zaeed, Grunt

Thanix Cannon: Thane, Garrus, Zaeed, Grunt, Jack, Samara/Morinth

The squadmates you take during the Oculus fight are protected from the Multicore Shielding death. I have no idea how you would even get down to the very ends of the lists, because I don’t think it has anything to do with loyalty, but there it is.

We chose Jacob as the tech specialist (he volunteered, after all), resulting in his death. Choosing a bad first squad leader also results in the tech specialist’s death (not the squad leader’s) so choosing a bad leader would be redundant unless we were trying to kill a loyal Kasumi, Legion, or Tali here.

We then chose Miranda as the biotic specialist (hey, she did say she could do it), non-loyal Garrus as the second squad leader, and loyal Mordin as the escort, to keep him safe during the defensive phase. (I’m pretty sure the escort lives no matter what if they are loyal, and dies no matter what if they are not loyal. I assume guides just tell you to pick Mordin because he is the first to die if the defensive line is too weak, but that logic is a bit flawed.) We took Zaeed and Morinth in our party for this part. Garrus died because wasn’t loyal, and Zaeed died to the seeker swarm because of Miranda.

As with the first squad leader, it is not the bad biotic themselves who dies. It is one of the two squadmates in your party. Per the wiki, the game prioritizes which party member the bad biotic kills in this order: Thane, Jack, Garrus, Legion, Grunt, Samara, Jacob, Mordin, Tali, Kasumi, Zaeed, Morinth.

Note that Miranda cannot die as the second squad leader or as a party member at this stage, and she cannot be assigned as the escort either. There are also no opportunities to kill her earlier - she and Jacob cannot be killed by any of the skipped upgrades, and only tech classes can be chosen as the tech specialist. Presumably this is so she can be present for the last group cutscene.

For the final boss fight, we brought Tali, to protect her during the defensive phase, and Miranda, to kill her - any non-loyal squadmates you bring to the final boss fight will die. This left Grunt, Legion, Morinth, and Kasumi, all loyal, as the defensive line. We did not know how the math worked at the time, but we knew what the death order was, so if the defenders were not strong enough then Kasumi and Morinth would die before Legion and Grunt.

Apparently the defensive line’s score is an average of the strength scores of its members. Loyalty increases a member’s score by +1.

Mordin, Tali, Kasumi, and Jack have base scores of 0.

Miranda, Jacob, Samara/Morinth, Legion, and Thane have base scores of 1.

Garrus, Zaeed, and Grunt have base scores of 3.

If the average of the defender scores is 2 or higher, all of them will survive. If the average is between 1 and 2, one will die. If it is less than 1, two will die. Also, if this means that if only one defender would be left, apparently they will die as well, as seen in this video.

The game prioritizes which defenders die in this order: Mordin, Tali, Kasumi, Jack, Miranda, Jacob, Garrus, Samara/Morinth, Legion, Thane, Zaeed, Grunt. Non-loyal defenders are prioritized to die before loyal defenders regardless of where they rank.

Shepard reportedly dies if there are less than two squadmates left at the end.

Our defenders averaged out to 2.25, so all of them lived. Our mission was still successful, however, as we’d killed all of our primary and secondary targets, plus a bonus target as a treat, not to mention that we’d already killed Samara during her loyalty quest - all while saving everyone we wanted to. We could have easily killed Kasumi by not upgrading the shields, too. I am not certain it would have been possible for us to kill both Morinth and Zaeed, however.

As frustrated as I initially was with Emily for not taking the game as seriously as I wanted her to, helping her kill all the characters she hated and save all the characters she liked was pretty damn satisfying.

Please correct me if any of this is wrong.

#mass effect trilogy #mass effect 2

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nerdierholler · 7 years

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When @apoloniaa asked for reluctant bed sharing, the first thing that came to my mind for my Shepard, Marie, was on the sad and angsty side so I wrote the fluff first. This is the much less fluffy fill.

Background: Marie develops a drinking problem at the beginning of ME2. Post Horizon, Dr. Chakwas and Garrus lead the intervention. This takes place shortly after that when Chakwas and Garrus are alternating keeping Shepard company in the evenings, her hardest time of day. It’s Garrus’ turn the night before they go to Ilium. Pre-Shakarian when they are still just very close friends.

Insecurities

Tomorrow they would go to Illium and look for the assassin. Tomorrow she would go back to being The Commander Shepard, not that it was ever possible to really stop. She would be a hero and a villain, a curiosity, an opportunity, a ghost brought back from the dead. She wanted a drink. Or five.

Instead she got up, carefully ignoring the spot where Garrus sat on the couch, and went to the bathroom. She grabbed a glass and filled it from the sink, drinking it in just a few gulps, then filled and drained it again.

“Shepard?” Garrus called from the the across the room, “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Everything’s fine.”

If she repeated the lie to herself enough, maybe eventually it would be true. She turned the tap on again, letting the cold water run for a moment before putting her hands under it. She ran them down her face and through her hair. The coolness gave her something to focus on, air from the vent blowing against her damp skin, the flush she felt on her cheeks slowly fading.

She could do this. She’d been a more than capable soldier and commander for years. It was just another assignment. She might hate her boss, but this needed to be done. Stopping the Collectors was the right thing to do and she was the only one who could do it. So much depending on her, as always. Failure was not an option. But what if… what if she couldn’t do it this time? What if she wasn’t the same person who was the Hero of Elysium?

“Marie?”

Shepard jumped at Garrus’ voice. He was standing in the bathroom doorway, watching her. She’d been so caught up in her thoughts that she hadn’t heard him get up. Her hands were gripping the sides of the sink, knuckles white, arms trembling. She took in a deep breath and tried to relax, loosening her grip but still holding on.

Taking in another breath, she tried to fight the tightness forming in her chest, worried she might burst into tears. Garrus had seen her worse than this, drunk and rambling, but for some reason, she didn’t want him to see her cry. He wouldn’t judge her or think less of her, but she still felt like she would be letting him down somehow.

Garrus stared at her patiently, not pushing or prodding, just waiting for her to collect herself. Turian expressions could be hard to read, but there was no mistaking the sadness and concern in his eyes.

“Maybe I should go lay down,” she said finally.

He stepped aside to let her pass then followed her past the fish tank and into the main room. “Do you want anything?”

Dr. Chakwas had prescribed a few things to help Shepard with her anxiety, or to sleep, but stubborn as ever, she refused to take them unless she had to. After Mindoir, there had been doctors who gave her the same kinds of drugs and she could still remember the stupor they left her in. Had it really been for her benefit, or had it been just another way to sweep her under a rug while colonial affairs did damage control on their image? She trusted Dr. Chakwas though, and she knew this was different, but Shepard still hated the way they made her feel.

“I…,” she frowned, squeezing her eyes shut, “I might need something to help me sleep if I’m going to be of any use tomorrow.”

“Sure thing.”

She heard Garrus go back to the bathroom, the sound of a cabinet opening, a bottle rattling, the tap running. A few moments later he was back with a single pill and glass of water.

“Thanks,” she said, taking them from him.

Garrus sat on the bed beside her, “Do you want to talk?”

Shepard thought for a moment, then shook her head, “I don’t think so. Maybe later.”

They sat there, together, for a long time, each lost in their own thoughts, occasionally broken by the sound of the fish tank bubbling or one of them shifting their weight on the bed. Slowly the sleeping pill began to kick in and Shepard’s head and limbs started to feel heavy. She leaned against Garrus for support, still fighting the urge to sleep.

Out of his armor and in regular clothes, Garrus was full of hard surfaces and sharp angles, but the firm muscles of his upper arm were comfortable enough for the moment. Shepard could feel him look down at her, but he didn’t say anything or otherwise move. The steady rise and fall of his chest as he breathed lulled Shepard further to sleep until she slumped forward, Garrus catching her before she fell off the bed.

He helped her straighten up, a large hand still resting on her arm, “I think this battle’s lost, Mare. Time for bed.”

“I know,” she sighed.

They both stood and Shepard began to pull back the covers and climb beneath them. Garrus started to turn out the lights as he made his way to the door, but with each one, an uneasiness grew inside Shepard. Even in this state, the old fears and worries would work their way back, giving her strange dreams and nightmares.

“Wait, don’t go.”

Garrus, was at the door, only the glow from the tank illuminating the room. “What is it?”

“Just, don’t go. Stay.” She swallowed, trying to choke back the shakiness to her voice, “Please.”

“Alright.” Garrus’ silhouette moved back into the room, “I’ll be right here on the couch.”

Shepard thought back to the moments just before, her mind untroubled as they sat together. She’d never been good at letting people get close, but she couldn’t deny the comfort she felt at the physical contact. Her mind flashed back to being a little girl on Mindoir and getting scared by the storms. She’d run to her parents room and sleep between them until the worst was over.

“Garrus, would you mind, that is…” This was ridiculous, she was a grown woman, she should be able to sleep on her own. “Would you sleep here with me?” The words came out of her mouth as a sudden impulse. Her brain overriding the part that wanted to be cold and logical.

There was silence in the room and Shepard began to wonder if she’d offended him somehow. All she could see was his outline and the soft blue glow from his visor.

“In your bed?” Garrus cleared his throat, “With you?”

There was no mistaking the uncertainty in his voice and Shepard realized how strange the proposition must have sounded to him.

“Yes, but not like that,” she was speaking quickly now, “just as friends.” Another long silence followed before Shepard finally spoke again, her voice soft and quiet this time, “I just don’t want to be alone.”

“Okay.” Garrus started the cross the room, to the other side of the bed, “I can understand that.”

Shepard felt the covers move and the bed shift as Garrus laid down. He stayed on his side, letting her control the space between them. In the dark, a small hand came to rest on his forearm, just below his wrist.

“Thanks,” Shepard mumbled and a few moments later she was sound asleep.

Watching her in the dark, her face finally peaceful and untroubled, Garrus whispered, “You’re welcome.”

#Garrus Vakarian #shakarian #pre-shakarian #Mass Effect #jane marie shepard #nerdy writes #life at nerdy holler #alcohlism

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