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#and they probably didnt get fair deals
pilkypills · 5 months
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sol1loqu1st · 1 year
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:/
#like if it is ptsd that means basically it's untreatable right? like the only way to really deal with it is i have to just accept that i'm#going to be miserable and awful to be around forever?#idk like thats why i was kind of hoping it /was/ something more uncommon like osdd because like. i know that can be hard to treat but i've#seen people make it work for them and make it a good thing even if it's hard. there are no upsides or benefits to having Just Fucking Ptsd#there's no sympathy for it if you didnt get it from combat (and even then lol)#and there's no real way to treat it except just learn to fucking avoid triggers and my triggers are FUCKING EVERYTHING#idk i just want a FUCKING SOLUTION and there is none#it's not fucking fair. it's not fucking fair#that my life is permanently ruined and horrible because my fucking mom decided that she needed to have a little mini-me#to project her fucking insecurities on instead of getting therapy#and now i'm never going to be happy! i don't get to have a good fucking life! i h#i have to spend the rest of my life fucking /coping/ with my own existence and having everyone fucking moralize me not wanting to do that#i'm a horrible person for even thinking about this stuff because me saying i cant recover probably makes other people in similar situations#think they also can't recover and i know that makes me bad and awful but like. it's different.#other people have friends who love them and care about them. i will never have that because i'm awful and everyone who gets close to me#realizes how awful i am and runs#other people have a chance at happiness even if it's hard. i don't. i'm never going to have people who love me and care about me. i'm never#going to be anyone's family and i can't fucking stand that
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toytulini · 5 months
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oh. i was gonna reblog the one defending toshiro too from a cultural perspective but the reblogs are off. rip
#toy txt post#dungeon meshi#not to both sides centrism it but i am gonna both sides centrism it a tiny little bit#yes toshiro shouldve corrected his name and shit. but i can also see the line of thinking that leads to not doing it?#hes probably its not a big deal he'll figure it out eventually. maybe after meeting ppl who refer to me by my name#he'll take the hint and be like oh shit wait fuck is it not shuro?#it is Hard to learn to Read The Room and even. sometimes often i think. even neurotypicals will fail that#and if you are actively bottling up the room and hiding it you really cant get That Mad. it was really#like major clash of communication styles there. exacerbated probably by toshiro running himself ragged in his search for falin?#which would make him have less of a reserve of patience to continue bottling up his frustrations and brushing it off#and he was probably trying to brush it off and Be Nice to Laois and humor him etc thinking that it wasnt a permanent situation and that he#wouldnt be living w him forever or whatever#so why would he hurt his feelings when he clearly means no harm by it? whats the point of that? it would be mean!#better to just ignore the frustrations and treat him nice and eventually itll stop being a problem! except oops it didnt stop being a#problem#i understand laois's frustration and its fair. and i also understand where toshiro is coming fro. and i understand how he got to that point#and i wonder if he hadnt been running himself ragged if he wouldve kept bottling it up? but maybe not bc its also exacerbated by#his anger at them doing black magic to resurrect falin?#which. that i dont get. chill bro its just a little black magic its fiiiiiine its the lunatic magician whos the problem! not#marcille or falin. loosen up bro#half joking about that#not to be an uncultured mon magic user or whatever but no offense but how is it really any worse than the other magic it just seemed like#magic with a little more. blood. idk guess im a Black Magic Apologist. what Marcille did is so in line w the ethics of my own personal#magic using ocs for my own shit. whats the problem. toshiro and chilchuck are just haters smh#and the whole world. poor marcille#marcille 🤝 wei wuxian. black magic support group. fuck it im inviting regina mills to it too even tho shes got other shit going on
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naes-dairy · 5 months
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I feel the need to vent publicly
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jvzebel-x · 1 year
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🦋
#hmmmm.#so i know that like. i come across-- pretty purposefully i knowww lmao-- as someone who Hates doctors#(&like. perhaps medical personnel in general lmao.)#i will give that this is a fair assessment based on my semi-regular bitching. lmao.#but also like i deal w medical personnel&aspiring medical personnel like. a lot lmao.#the actual amount of these ppl i deal w vs the percentage that i go ballistic over makes it a nonissue as far as im concerned lmao.#(actually quite reminiscent of when ppl accuse me of hating yt ppl just bc i complain about them specifically as if i dont live in portland#where the percentage of these ppl i deal w is damn near 100%&would be if i didnt purposefully go out of my way to change that lmao.#it is not my fault that i deal w specific things that can be chalked up to specific categorizations&am willing to note why that is lmao.)#anyway so i had to work around a new oncologist for a variety of reasons lmao&the new doc i have also specializes in#disordered eating which i guess makes sense as a gastric&intestinal focused oncologist&we had the most fascinating preintake convo.#lately my gastroparesis has been like. absurdly bad lmao. its always been a problem but the last couple months ive been dropping weight#again like crazy bc my food isnt getting digested-- just thrown back up after a few hours bc human bodies arent meant to ferment shit lmao.#the meds i started taking a bit ago for it have been helping but not enough to help me gain any weight back-- im back to being#solidly under a 100lbs lmao&its been wreaking havok all over like. everything. lmao.#something something this is likely due in part to the Bad mania lmao. but seeing as im probably stuck w my fucked up head#regardless of the nature or nurture of it all as w most of this shit it doesnt really matter i just need to find a way to fix it lmao.#so anyway we were talking about the mental issues that are starting to surface-- bc if i throw fucking everything up i dont want to eat#(which is i guess the mirror version of what my problem was for YEARS before my diagnosis when i would eat whatever the fuck i wanted#bc it all caused me pain no matter what so if its a choice between a salad&beef jerky+coke+ice cream its literally a no brainer lmao.)#(... i actually won more than one ice cream eating contest back when it was still a thing i could do back home lmao.)#but anyway part of my thing right now is also like. im having a difficult time wanting to eat bc theres the obvious fact that cooking#for myself feels like a huge waste of time&energy if im just going to puke it all back up&be in pain again anyway.#&the other part of my thing right now is that i fucking hate wasting the amount of food im wasting doing this shit.#both these problems are like. life long problems that any permadisabled poor person will def recognize lmao#but lately its been SO BAD. the holy trinity of wasted time+money+food has literally just been too fucking much lmao.#&the doc thus far is really receptive to the practical problems like this as well as the more specific to me+nuanced problems#which is just. so incredibly relieving. at least for right now lmao.
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cosmiiwrites · 6 months
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·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ enemies to lovers
.ೃ࿐ adam x fem!reader .ೃ࿐
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⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ summary: in which you and adam find out you don't hate each other as much as you think you do cw: NSFW, fem!reader, p in v, oral (f!recieving), creampie, adam (he's his own warning), hair pulling, semi-public sex, cussing a/n: FINALLY DONE !! first smut fic though, so apologies if some things dont make sense :(
you hated adam. you hated his cocky attitude and his fuckboy persona. and most of all, you hated how everyone stayed quiet about it. him being the first man didn't mean jack shit to you. if he was being an egotistical asshole? you won't hesitate to put him in his place. even if that meant starting an argument in front of the promenade, putting your hatred for one another on display.
adam, on the other hand, loved someone who could match his abrasive attitude. and it meant more that you went out of your way to shout insults at him every chance you got. to be honest? it turned him on. but he would rather die then admit that. during meetings, you two would bicker non-stop, shooting daggers at each other from across the table. so yes, everyone and their mothers knew about you and adam's ongoing feud. what did everyone also know? the unspoken sexual tension between you two. the tension so thick it was tangible. the tension everyone knew about except the two idiots who claimed they hated each other. even lute was getting sick of it. "what a bitch, am i right?" "yes, sir." "she's just salty because i'd never go for a cunt like her," "mhm, sir." "maybe i sho-" "you know what i just remembered? sera saying she had something to discuss with me. ill be leaving now, sir." adam shot her a confused look. it wasnt like lute to walk out on a conversation so abruptly. (spoiler alert, she just didnt want to hear adam talk about you for the millionth time today) "well, uh, shit, okay." upon leaving, adam bumped into a familiar face. "well, well, well, if it isn't-" you slid right past him, ignoring any advance he'd tried making towards you. "what the fuck?" adam's face grew warm from embarrassment. did you just ignore him? he planted himself in front of you, hoping to make a statement. his tall figure hovered over yours. "ignoring me, hm? is that any way to treat the first man?" he teased. you sighed and rubbed your forehead in annoyance before answering, "if by 'first man' you mean 'overly-confident egomaniac' then yes." that's what adam liked about you; you didnt kiss his ass 24/7 like all the other angels. you didnt crave his approval. "i seriously don't understand how people can tolerate being around you," you groaned.
"oh fuck off, the ladies love me," he grinned. "especially in be-" you threw your hand to cover his mouth. "ugh, spare me the details, you gross fuck." your statement only widened his shit-eating grin. "why, jealous?" he teased, dragging on the s. "fuck, no! i feel bad for all the women you've slept with, they've probably faked all their orgasms as to not hurt your fragile ego." you retorted. adam's smirk dropped. he couldn’t BELIEVE you thought he was incapable of pleasuring a woman. luckily for you, his anger quickly turned to interest as an idea popped up in adam's head. he leaned into your ear, voice low and husky, "you wanna bet on that?"
taken aback from his sudden offer , you backed up until your back hit the wall of the alley you two were in. “what,” you breathed, “are you on about?”
“if i can make you cum,” adam started, “you have to admit that one; im the dick-fuckin’-master, and two; i AM capable of pleasuring a woman. deal?” adam's said a ton of dumb shit, but this? you let out a boisterous laugh. “are you serious?” but after a few beats of unearthly silence, thats when you knew he was. “well, shit.” you did want a chance at proving him wrong and taking down his ego. to be fair, no one’s made you cum in a long, long time. and you were always up for a challenge.
you grabbed adam by the collar and dragged him down to your level.
“deal.”
———————————————————————
thats how you found yourself up against a wall, being eaten out by the first man, the first soul in heaven, and your well-known rival.
you didnt want to admit it, but god, this man was good with his tongue. not to mention his hands.
he gripped your thighs tightly, spreading them apart and smirking up at you. your flustered face drove him mad, only fueling his desire for you. its not his fault you looked so fuckin’ cute. maybe he should get you like this more often…
adam shamelessly licked up and down your entrance, earning small involuntary whimpers from you. he dragged his hand down your thigh to rub circles on your clit, making you twitch under his touch. “taste so fuckin’ good,” he growled. wanting more, you tugged at his hair, forcing his tongue to prod at your cunt. “impatient, are we? and to think you hated me.”
it was like he was waiting for this exact moment; for adam ate like a man starved. like he hadn’t eaten in days, and you were the only thing that could nourish him.
suddenly, he dragged his long tongue against your clit, “shit, adam!” he smirked against your cunt. “enjoying y’self, babe?” “f-fuck—haah—you!” was all you can manage, before he sunk his tongue deeper into you, fingers now circling your clit twice as fast. “dont worry, tits, you’ll be doing that in a bit.”
it wasnt long before you had cum all over his tongue and face, panting like a maniac. you had already lost the bet, but you didnt care. nor had any of you two mentioned it. lost in a drunken haze, all you wanted was his cock buried inside of you.
you quickly recovered from your high and grinded against his painfully hard erection. “s-shit, babe, didn’t take you for a desperate whore,” adams words were slurred, his need for you fogging his brain. “s-shut up,” you retorted “looks like you can still talk back,” he grinned. “i’ll fuck that bratty attitude out of you.” “youve yet to do so,” you teased. “you bluffing, dickmaster?” oh, now you’ve got him in a chokehold.
those would be your famous last words, before adam would recklessly pound into you.
adam quickly undid his boxers, revealing his hard cock, precum already spilling from his tip. you thought he was joking when he called himself the ‘dickmaster.’ you silently wondered how that would fit inside of you. “see how fuckin’ worked up you get me, tits?” adam babbled.
he bent you over, your wrists just above your head.
you were about to reply with a snarky comeback when he pushed his cock into you, no warning beforehand.
“i fuckin’ knew it,” he said. “tight as shit. bet no one’s fucked you as good as im about to, huh?” you wanted to respond, to deny his accusations, but the only sounds that left your mouth were desperate moans and whimpers. it was like music to his ears, fueling him to fuck you brainless.
his large size stung, but pain quickly turned to pleasure when he began to move.
he picked up his pace, pounding into you brutally. it was oh, so sinful. but adam would go to hell anyday if that meant he could have your tight little cunt all to himself.
adam took a fistful of your hair, forcing your back to arch. when you didnt protest, adam threw a line of praise at you. “there we go, good fuckin’ girl, just like that…” the position you were in was a bit uncomfortable, but you quickly stopped paying attention to that when adam thrusted into you sharply. “s-so good f’me,” he babbled.
you knew he was almost at his peak when his thrusts grew sloppy. “shit, almost there, fuck!” he groaned. “m-me too, adam, fuck,”
in one deep thrust, he buried himself inside of you, spilling his cum. you felt your stomach grow warm, full of adam’s seed.
adam was still inside of you, even after you both had came. there were no sounds other than your pants and his huffs. thank god this was an empty street.
finally, he pulled out of you. you whined at the loss of contact, earning you a cheeky grin.
“so,” he said, breaking the silence. “how was that for pleasuring a woman, hmmm?” adam smirked. “still hate me?”
“always, just a little less now.”
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hanatagami · 7 months
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sagau imposter au (part 1)
i was just introduced and am now an avid enjoyer to sagau, especially imposter ones, so i wanted to make some hcs. this is gonna be your pov, but i would like to do povs of the actual characters too.
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Upon “descending” to teyvat, under circumstances you know now, you find yourself to be incredibly lucky that you arrived where you did
you woke up in a domain of all places
it was a weird thing to wake up to, being in the middle of a strange platform with a golden tree not to far from you
you weren’t certain what domain per say, but you could confidently deduce its domain-hood, though it never acted like a typical domain
as in monsters didnt spawn and there wasn’t a challenge for you to face
instead it acted like your own personal sanctuary
if you wanted to sleep: a bed would appear inside
the same with a bathroom (which was weird to use in a space that seemed almost alive) and any other luxuries or necessities you needed
you made sure to compliment the space you were in, just in case, and was surprised when the tree tinted pink, but in a situation like this
more shocking things were bound to happen
like looking at your body and noticing veins of gold which was plenty shocking, the gold seemed to be able to glow or dim to your desire.
You could make it so looked like your body was covered in rivers made of stars (which did wonders for your confidence, way better then any tattoo you could’ve gotten irl) or dim it to where the gold looked completely unnoticeable 
now youve read your fair share of sagau fics, and you deemed its probably safest to stay in a domain for now, until you figure what tropes may await you
god forbid-
‘(Y/n) forbid...? no thats weird’ you think to yourself
god forbid it was an imposter au or smth and you get smited by whatever archon this domain resides in
luckily, the people in the world dont seem to be checking domains you      h o p e
your content residing in the domain till you’ve figured out the full extent of your abilities, and it was only then that the domain provided enemies for you to practice on
(thankfully they weren’t actually alive, cause they are supposed to be your subjects now or something)
you figured out what you could with the guidance of a space that couldn’t physically speak with you, but you did your best
you were surprised to find that a lot of abilities weren’t really used by you per say, but rather that things followed your requests, if that made sense
you didn’t conjure wind to blow enemies away, but you gave silent requests and was gleefully answered
you didn’t create waves of water to send crashing against opponents, you asked and something, maybe Teyvat itself, listened
your hypothesis was that the original creator could manipulate things, but that is either learned or wasn’t passed on to you? 
you thought yourself not as the original creator, but a reinvention of them. Almost like Nahida, you aren’t the orginal creator but perhaps the creator remade themselves into you and placed in another world to be raised as peoples equal and learn things like morals
 perhaps tired of an eternal, all knowing, and all powerful existence.
it was a good idea to keep yourself free of the burdens of immortality, a self-imposed somewhat-life cycle
well that was your hypothesis, you didn't know for sure
but what you did know is that almost everything would answer your requests, even vague concepts like time, space, or gravity
you were even able to control the size of your body, growing big enough to fill the void below the domain, or small enough to be a molecule no one could see (you weren’t sure what was responding to you to do that, but it still worked) 
‘the original creator mustve been amazing...’ you often thought to yourself
You goofed around a lot with these abilities before deciding to go out and venture into actual teyvat, to figure out what you were actually dealing with 
imposters, killer characters, or whoever...beware, you know what your doing (kinda)
and as you stepped out into the land (after giving the domain a big thanks and promise to visit again) you grew a little surprised at the outfit change that happened the moment you stepped on land.
rocks and minerals from the earth arose and surrounded your body, not stabbing or poking you in anyway
instead it felt secure and comforting
you spun and gazed down in awe as all kinds of materials formed garments around your body
it was like a dream outfit for you, something celestial that you could only see in your imagination
and it looked like it came straight from Liyue
and which upon surveying your surroundings of the things in the area, seemed to be Liyue
when you turned around, there wasn’t actually a domain there, so you couldn’t use it as a landmark or anything
(it must be some personal creator domain? that would make sense)
maybe your “holy” garments change depending the country you were in?
Interesting theory, but you didn’t feel like testing it out just yet
requesting the materials to form something a little more Liyue casual to hopefully blend in
and with that you set off!
it only took a few minutes to realize you weren’t quite sure where you were going, but don’t worry, Teyvats got you
a beautiful path made of stone that was embedded with cor lapis arose from the ground to guide you to the city, your desired destination
and as you gazed behind you noticed the path disappeared a couple steps behind you
‘only i get the red carpet, eh? how kind~’
 and with that NOW you set off
it was a very wonderful walk, really
much more peaceful then any walk you’ve had playing the game
no hilichurls or slimes or abyss mages trying to test your patience like they did with your designated traveler
well they did approach, but they approached bearing gifts! it was actually cute watching hilichurls walk up to you with their most valued item, and its like just an apple or something
but you thanked them, gave them a pat to which they always did their little dance which you couldn’t help but chuckle at (it was so much better in person) and that only seemed to make them more cheery as they went back to their tribe
slimes came up for some pets, which how could you not
when you pet the first slime that came up, a pyro slime, you were amazed at the way it felt. It didn’t turn its element off, cause apparently it didnt need too. when you touched it you could feel the pure heat it eminated, but it wasn’t painful. there was a firmness from slime section but the fire itself only seemed to keep you warm
it was then your goal to experience petting slimes of all elements on your way to Liyue’s city
and the results of your petting: electro had a pleasant tingling (especially if you have one hand on a purple one and the other ona yellow one), hydro was more water then slime, anemo felt like putting your hand above a air hockey table, dendro was disappointingly normal but it smelt really nice, and cryo felt like a thin layer of ice on top of water, and geo was rough (unshockingly)
it made your trip to the city very eventful and quick, you didn’t notice time passing at all
it was upon approaching the big gate of Liyue did you really stop to think of a plan
what were you gonna do when they recognize you? cause according to the fics you’ve read, they always do
eh you’ll wing it, you just wanna try Xiangling’s cooking tbh
and maybe one of Chongyun’s popsicles
would they recognize you and agree? would they think you were an imposter or something? you were kinda excited to find out
to avoid the small fries (the guards) from pulling anything, you covered the rest of the distance using a form of teleportation (thanks space) and entered straight into Liyue
you had appeared in an ally to hopefully avoid people spotting you fade into existence there
willing yourself to appear a little more confident (you’ve heard looking confident can really get you places when trying to sneak or fool people)
you began to trek through the big city you’ve grown so used to seeing from a screen
and you really arrived at just the right time, since it was dark from the night sky so all the lights and lanterns were lit, lighting up the city beautifully
so much more beautiful then in game, thats for sure
it kinda made you eager to see the lantern festival! the big deer lantern (the deer was actually an adepti wasn’t it? you kinda forgot) was sure to be breathtaking in person
and maybe it was your outfit, or maybe the lack of guards, nobody was really clocking you on your appearance
(you were only now deliberating that they may not know your appearance, it may be a vibe thing but who knows)
you didn’t see any statues dedicated in your honor, which was kinda a plus. no direct comparisons can be made
you had come up to Xiangling’s restaurant and she was, thankfully, the only one there
“Uh, excuse me.”
“Yes, how can I- Your grace!?” 
ah, she knows
“SHHHH, I dont want anyone to know!”
“How are you here? Where are your guards?? It isn’t safe-”
“Don’t worry about it! I just want some of your food is all, I promise I’ll go back right away.”
 So there was an imposter...how interesting.
“I could of just delivered it to you Your Grace, or someone could of picked it up!” She was looking at you with great concern, you weren’t entirely sure what would threaten the “creator” in this world to begin with, but they may just be paranoid.
“I mean with this imposter going around, who knows what they may try and do...” The thought itself seemed to bring Xiangling great distress, her body visibly drooping at her words.
It felt weird for her to be so concerned over you, when its not actually you shes concerned for. Not you, but someone whose trying to be you, so ig in concept shes concerned for you?
whatever
“Come on, this is definitely one of the safest cities to be in, you know that. By the time they tried anything they’d already be getting chased outta here! Besides, your right here, you can protect me!” It was weird trying to comfort her in this situation, and you could only guess if you were mimicking the actual imposter correctly.
“Well...I guess so...” She didn’t seem completely convinced at that, but she seemed to be letting it slide slightly at the thought of protecting and spending time with you. How sweet~
“Hey, do you think you can make me your signature boiled fish?” You were trying to stay vague...you wanted to try it, but you weren’t sure if the imposter had already, so you had to be picky about your words.
“Uh, sure. Yeah! I can do that for you!” She was channeling some optimism now, her face bright at the thought of “your grace” trying her signature dish. It was really cute!
You were lucky no one heard her shouting “your grace” however many times, there weren’t any other customers and her dad wasn’t there for whatever reason.
But that didn’t stop someone from recognizing you though.
You had felt something pulling on the lower half of your clothes, so naturally you look down and see 
the one and only
former god
Guoba was gazing up at you with sparkles around his eyes
he seemed really excited to see you!
“Oh, aren’t you the cutest!” You were quick to scoop him up and give him the bestest of cuddles you could muster, and he seem to respond in kind
he was so much softer then you could of thought, and he emitted such a nice warmth
people in your world were told not to hug bears, so you werent gonna pass the chance to do so in this one
“Wha--Guoba?!” You both pause in your cuddling sensation to give Xiangling a shocked look at her interuption. Her attention had completely left the food she had been preparing previously (impressively enough her hands still seemed to be cooking it perfectly) and was focused solely on your interaction with the little guy.
“What’s the matter? Should I not be hugging him?” 
“No no! Your more then welcome too Your Grace! Well at least I say but...the last couple times Guoba completely...disregarded you! I guess I’m just shocked.” Her gaze had bashfully returned to the food, potentially embarrassed at having such an outburst in front of you.
“Well I don’t know, maybe he just needed to get used to me.” You focus back on the little guy in front of you and part of you knows thats not really the truth. He’d been so “disregarding” because it was the imposter he had been presented with, not you. He didn’t really make expression but you could tell that he was really excited to see you and be held by you. he’s so freakin cuTE-
Another part of you was thinking, surely someone must’ve seen that as strange. You thought back to the “monsters” too, someone surely must’ve picked up that the imposter being ignored by animals or attacked by “monsters” should be very suspicious. But according to this whole imposter fiasco, it wasn’t suspicious to warrant a check. 
“Here you are! A Wanmin Restaurant Boiled Fish, our speciality!” Xiangling placed the meal in front of you and gave you one of the brightest smiles you’ve ever seen, you almost had to squint at it. A mix of Guoba’s sudden acceptance of you, and trying her signature dish must be really exciting.
Sitting Guoba down in the chair next to you (to his displeasure, as he made sure you knew with an unhappy grunt) you pick up the utensils and look down at the meal in front of you. It smelled heavenly and you made sure to give it a good sniff before getting a spoonful and getting a taste.
The flavor embraced your tongue wonderfully, it was so delicious it was easy to think you wouldn’t order anything else at this establishment. I mean the characters always said Xiangling was a good cook, but this meal was just a whole other level of good.
During your food-caused glee, you didn’t take notice on how Xiangling had looked at you. She couldn’t help but think you looked especially radiant today, not to say you didn’t anytime else, but there was something about today that gave you such a...glow. Watching your eyes shut in delight, humming at the taste of the meal, she felt a warmth from your presence she hadn’t realized was lacking before. Even in a common Liyue garb, every aspect of you invited people to be enraptured by you and your presence. Her heart raced as your eyes cracked open happily to indulge in another bite. She hadn’t seen you so pleased trying food before, though she wasn’t really around to see you eatting
but the face you were making...part of her wishes you only made that face when you ate her food
she knew that if the rest of her life was spent only cooking for you, it’d be a life worth living. (she knew that before hand, but now more then ever did she feel that way)
Guoba had grumpily forced himself into your lap, making you have to scooch your chair back a bit to fit him while still eating (not that you minded, it enhanced the experience tbh)
Letting out a sigh at your full and satisfied stomach, you wrapped your arms around Guoba and buried your face into the top of his head
He let out a small sound of satisfaction, which was very cute
Gazing at Xiangling she seemed to be flustered trying to find a topic of conversation, which was kinda shocking cause she didnt seem like the type to struggle conversationally
(it was probably cause it was you)
“Bleh...I don’t really wanna go back after such a nice meal. I wanna have fuuun! Is there anything we can do that won’t get me caught?” You interrupted her internal dilemma with your own dilemma. 
How do we get more out of my time in Liyue before im wrongfully exposed?
“I know! Are Chongyun or Xingqiu busy? We can hang out with them!”
She seemed conflicted at your suggestion, probably wanting to take you back for safety reasons, but also not wanting to cut your time together short.
“And Guoba doesn’t me to go either, see?” And indeed you were correct! The bear was giving Xiangling the best puppy eyes he could while in possession of bear eyes, and you could tell it was working wonders on her
you could tell by the sudden slump of her shoulders that her internal battle had concluded, and you let a bright smile at her sheepish nods.
Now what misdeeds can you guys get into before getting caught??
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invertedheaven · 2 months
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If You Really Love Nothing
chapter 1: easier said than done
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chapter index | next chapter
“I fucked up satoru” you said with a mouthful of cereal that you helped yourself to the second you stepped into gojos house because you were finally not nauseous
He looked up at you from over his phone, he never hears you admit you’re wrong in any form so this was interesting to him “hmmm how so?”
“Im pregnant” your heartbeat was so loud in your ears you weren’t even sure you said it loud enough and you refused to look at him to see if he heard you
And while he assumed it was bad he didn’t assume this bad… “do you know whose it is?”
“….sukunas” you squeeze your eyes shut as if it would spare you from the judgement in his eyes
His eyes widen “Didnt you guys break up? Didnt he move away not even like three months ago?”
“He was in town again a few weeks ago… almost two months after we broke up and he found me, we went out to eat and well, it was our last night together I was stupid” you exhale before continuing “but I took plan b as soon as possible the next day I thought it would’ve worked…”
Gojo swallowed before speaking because this is something he’d expect from probably anyone but you “I gotta say, sleeping with him even after he broke up with you a week after your birthday… to each their own I guess”
You feel like you’re about to burst into tears because you know gojos right and you hate that, this could’ve been avoided if you’d just had some pride
Noticing your silence he spoke up again “do you want to keep it?”
And finally the tears started flowing and he immediately regretted asking
You did want to keep it, you had always wanted to be a mother, and you loved sukuna so much you wanted it to be with him, but that felt like a selfish reason to want a baby and yet an even bigger part of you felt like you wanted this baby no matter what but financially you knew it wasn’t possible, and you couldn’t do that to a child.
“I’ll be honest satoru, I do. I really do want to but financially it wouldn’t be feasible and I don’t think its fair to raise a child knowing that and on top of that they wont have both their parents, its an awful experience… I dont want that kind of childhood for my baby” you finally make eye contact with him and he’s staring at you with such pity because he knows your childhood and the pity he’s showing almost makes you mad.
Until you hear footsteps running down the stairs already knowing who it was you wiped the tears from your face before you turn around and smile as brightly as you can “hi gumi, how are you today?” As he comes up to you to give you a hug, satoru rolls his eyes “you’re the only person he ever greets enthusiastically”. You find this hilarious because if you looked at it any other way you’d think megumi was being held at gunpoint to say hi to you, but you suppose even if he’s not smiling just the fact that he’s willingly saying hi with a hug was enough proof.
You laugh before you speak “no need to be so happy about that satoru”
Megumi goes to the fridge to get a snack and then runs back upstairs, you find your stare lingering on the fridge, a picture that gojo definitely forced megumi to take with him hung up on the door with a silly magnet and the smile you were wearing quickly turned to a frown. While gojo watched you closely he came up with what he thought was a genius idea:
“Move in with me” he smiles
You tear your stare away from the fridge and instead look at him with a bewildered look, clearly too shocked to say anything
“Think about it… megumi doesn’t hate you, you could raise the baby without any distractions, and I would love to have just one adult around here if I have to deal with his preteen attitude alone for one more day im gonna lose my mind” he pauses letting the thought sit then continued “the baby wouldn’t grow up in the most conventional house, but it could work megumi needs someone who isn’t me around anyways, he doesn’t seem entirely emotionally adjusted…”
That earns a laugh from you because if gojo was calling someone unadjusted then thats saying something
“I wouldn’t be the stepfather if thats what you’re worried about, im too cool to be a dad I’d be like the fun uncle plus I have my hands full attempting parenting with megumi”
You finally break the silence “financially I can’t do that to you satoru… thats too much and while I want to say yes, it doesn’t seem too thought out either”
“But what is there to think about? you already spend all your time here and face it, all our friends moved away…” and his cheerful attitude quickly changed to something more solemn than you’re used to coming from gojo “I don’t have suguru anymore and you don’t have sukuna, I don’t really like how lonely it feels” he almost mumbles
You never thought you’d see the day where you felt understood by satoru of all people but he was right, it was lonely and sad, you hated it more than anything
He spoke up again “And about the money? Are you choosing to forget that I’m just waiting for my old man to kick the bucket so I can be CEO of the company or is that not important enough to remember?” He says with a smug look that you want to slap off of him “I have more money then I know what to do with right now, so why don’t you let me help you and you can help me too”
He says your name so quietly you almost don’t hear it with how loud your thoughts are and you turn you head slightly to look back at him he has his arm reaching across to you, asking you to shake on it
This seemed too good to be true, something out of a movie or a tv show, this probably wouldn’t end well either and yet you want to say yes more than anything
“Are you sure satoru? Not a lot of guys would be willing to financially support someone else’s kid and their mom” and at that moment megumi came back down the stairs again getting a water bottle instead, now staring at gojos stretched out hand suspiciously before speaking “whatever he’s trying to get you to do, don’t do it” as he went back upstairs you looked back at gojo who had a look on his face that you would say puts the word “annoyed” to shame
“What was that about other peoples kids?” Gojo responded to your earlier question before he was rudely interrupted by megumi
You bite back a smile before reaching over and shaking his hand “fine, but Im working as long as I can before it becomes too much and… thank you satoru”
————
Thats how you find yourself here, three years later washing the dishes from the lunch you had made for you and your daughter, Airi. Satoru had taken her with him to the store, which she loves to do because she’s learned satoru will literally buy her anything she asks for without even asking you, but you guess its okay since this seems like a nice problem to have.
Once you finish the dishes you moved onto wiping the counter before you hear megumi come home, he’s 14 now and you feel so proud of the teen he’s become yes he’s a little temperamental but he’s a good kid nonetheless. You notice there’s another voice you don’t recognize completely forgetting he told you he was bringing his friend by later and as you round the doorway of the kitchen you stop in your tracks because you’re met with a kid who looks a little too much like sukuna and your daughter. Their family genes were too strong with some weird type of blonde that it was basically pink and you’d never seen anyone else with it. The only thing is that yuji had a different face shape and eyes, it felt like you saw a ghost and you’re sure megumi could see it too so he finally spoke up
“This is itadori yuji he’s the friend I mentioned earlier, you said it was okay for him to come by” he still waits for your face to change from one of shock
��Um yeah, no thats fine hello yuji its nice to meet you” you offer a smile and a handshake and you tell him your name
His eyes widen slightly at that but he doesn’t express any thoughts that he knows you otherwise, he thinks the world can’t be that small… right?
He greets you back as well as returning your handshake before they enter the house more and meanwhile you finally snap out of it you run to the kitchen taking your daughters pictures off the fridge and putting them in your pocket before calling megumi over, and yuji follows
Hiding the nerves in your voice you speak up “So! Yuji tell me about yourself, id love to hear more about our megumis friend” to which megumi groans at the question
Yuji laughs at the “our megumi” and he wonders what your relation to megumi is because you’re too young to be his mom yet you look nothing like him so sibling is out of the picture maybe stepmom would be most likely, “well I just moved out here at the beginning of the school year, I used to live a few hours out, but my grandpa recently passed away so im living with my older brother now”
Everything lines up too much and now you’re uncontrollably shaking this kid really shares a lot huh? “Ahhh okay I see, thats nice is he your only sibling?”
“Yeah but its weird he was staying with a family friend to attend school so he lived out here for a few years but almost 4 years ago he came home still didn’t see him much though… but a few months ago he moved back here and well now im stuck with him” yuji says casually like he didn’t just reveal your daughters dad is back and he doesn’t even know she exists
Trying to change the subject you start “I always wondered what it was like to have siblings, I think satoru is the closest I’ll get” before yuji can question who satoru is megumi cuts in “why’d you bring him up we were having a decent conversation” to which you laugh because nothing puts megumi in a worse mood than satoru talk
“Wow fushiguro you said you drew but I didnt think you’d be that bad” as yuji points to one of the drawings airi made on the fridge you didn’t think he’d even notice that and now you’re freaking out trying to think
Megumi starts to speak up “hey, that is not mine thats her-“
You cut him off before he can speak anymore “Its my niece! My bestfriend had a kid and I help babysit her she’s the sweetest” you say staring at megumi hoping he notices the frantic look in your eyes while yuji observes the drawing up close but all he does is stare at you utterly confused as to why you’re clearly lying
Yuji finally responds “ah that explains the toys in the living room” and it makes you very nauseous just thinking about how observant this kid is and he’s so honest about it too…
You clear your throat “megumi can you help me bring in the stuff I left in my car yesterday? Sorry I was waiting for satoru but if you’re here” you apologize to yuji as you practically pull megumi out the front door and to the drive way
he doesn’t waste a minute in speaking “why did you lie about airi?”
You take a deep breathe before speaking “look, I’m 99% sure that yuujis brother is Airis dad his name is ryomen sukuna… he would mention having a brother named yuji and that he had a sick grandfather. I also know when he was living out here during our last year of high school he wasn’t living with family, the last time I saw him was pretty much 4 years ago before he left again and most importantly sukuna doesn’t know about airi…” you start again before he has the chance to bring it up “they don’t have the same last name because sukuna uses their moms name”
Megumis eyes widen for two reasons, how’d you know he’d ask that? and also because he just assumed Airis dad sucked not that he didn’t even know she existed “why haven’t you told him about her?”
“Its complicated but to put it simply he blocked me on everything, I couldn’t contact him even if I wanted to and that was when I was pregnant so imagine trying to contact him now… and yuji cannot know because he’ll tell sukuna or he’ll have to hide it which is even worse” you put your face in your hands trying to keep the tears in
Although megumi doesn’t understand why you don’t just tell sukuna he finds its not his business, he also respects you too much to question you and although he probably wouldn’t say it out loud he loved airi and considered her as his sister so if it meant helping you out he’d keep his mouth shut “okay, I understand, yuji can’t find out” and against his will you pull him into a hug and thanked him a million times
He headed back inside and the second the door shut you pulled out your phone to call satoru, after what felt like forever he finally picked up the phone but you’re instead met with your daughters voice “hi mommy!!!” And for a second you forget the reason you’re calling wondering how she knew it was you “hi my baby, can you please put ‘toru on the phone?” she doesn’t respond but you can hear her tell satoru you want to talk to him
And the next voice you hear is the man you hope has a solution “Hello?”
“Satoru, i have a problem”
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colubrina · 8 months
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idk if you have a TikTok or if you keep up with the HP fandom over there; but apparently manacled by SenLinYu was posted on Amazon for purchase (not by the author). It’s since been removed but was up for more than a couple days. And there were individuals on TikTok that just didnt understand why others were getting so upset. Like let’s disregard the fact that someone other than the original author profiting off this work, but I actually saw people that were very firm in the belief that they could sell fanfic. Whether that be through book binds, cases like this, or commissions/Patreon. I’m an elder gen Z, and I remember coming into the fanfiction spaces pretty early on maybe like 07-08?? I think I was 9-10 reading HP fics on fanfiction.net and very vividly remember everyone being super specific about “this is not my sandbox, I’m just playing around” or “If you recognize anything, it doesn’t belong to me”. So I’m always surprised by people that really don’t see a problem with it. I’ve even seen people claim that it will either fall within the limits of fair use or that it would be a PR nightmare for someone to go after someone. I guess I was 1.) just wanting to rant about how shortsighted I think it was to someone that was around in fanfic space before 2015 and 2.) get thoughts from an author that I feel like has had several popular/successful fics in the fandom.
Yeah, I've got a TikTok. I never post anything, but I try to share anything people make that's nice about my old fics. I always have this half-assed feeling like I should make things but I don't. (https://www.tiktok.com/@colubrina_)
2. Congrats to Senlinyu on her book deal - very cool!
3. And yeah, I saw that people were doing that, and I wish I was surprised but I'm not. There's always been a not-insignificant part of the dramione fandom that sees the fics as 'belonging to the fandom.' They will post them on sites where the author doesn't want them. They will host PDFs online even when you directly ask them not to. They will rehost fics authors have taken down, orphaning them on AO3 so they can't be stopped. They don't see it as stealing because they see the fics as public property. It was probably just a matter of time before they started trying to host them on Amazon. It's frustrating for sure, but it does feel a bit like 'here we go again.' It certainly doesn't fall under fair use, and I think Manacled might be one of the very few fics that will have a legal department eager to keep it offline so the publisher can make their money from it, but other people will be less fortunate. Fic has become enough of a part of the ecosystem it's not at any kind of risk as an artform. But, yeah, it sucks. Be nice to your authors. Respect their wishes. Don't do this shit.
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goomyloid · 4 months
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PLEASE explain your thoughts on kriselle in full detail
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS 100% UNPROMPTED ASK! I SHALL EXPLAIN
i hate toby fox. why did he do this to us. he really put it better than anyone else. not really romantic not really platonic but…. something else… some secret more sinister more heartfelt more absurd third thing
i wonder at what point should i clarify that i dont even really seek out kriselle in a romantic context… DONT GET ME WRONG i have zero issues with the ship whatsoever and all of the krisellers out there are living their best (most painful) lives and i SEE THE APPEAL. BUT when i rotate them in my brain i dont need them to kiss or anything like that i just need them to sit down and sadly hold hands and stay like that forever and ever. in case you couldnt gauge that from my art so far
tldr i dont think i ship them in the traditional sense at least …. the things that i usually fixate on for any romantic ship are not there with these two. there are no romantic feelings there In my mind. and all at the same time i start screaming and throwing up and killing myself (all positive) whenever i see them even in the same image together. hngh
ive tried explaining this to people before and they usually suggest something along the lines of a QPR and even that doesnt feel right to me. truly the best way i can put it is… that red string of fate man… which i almost hesitate on saying too because i dont actually know if noelle is Quite an important enough character to the story to warrant a connection like that. WHICH IS A CRAZY THING TO SAY. I KNOW. DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT GETTING ME WRONG i think dess and her connections to gaster and her usage as a stepping stone into the weird route are all VERY important… but in my brain its just not kris/knight/asriel/every other mysterious main focus of the story Important. i didnt mean to get into deltarune theorizing here i hope nobody’s blood is boiling rn
so yeah in the end. toby fox once again put it best. they are friends, but they are also something else.
back to the actual pairing though… sometimes i think im going overboard and overestimating how close kris and noelle were as children because noelle will go and say things like “i wonder if we were ever really friends at all.” which is kind of a fair statement considering the circumstances. sure they played together and all and tagged along with their siblings to do stuff together but when dess went missing… it all kind of stopped. kris is just a kid, they dont know what to do or even how to process it, much like noelle. asriel is probably dealing with his own feelings, he just lost his friend and likely old enough to understand the weight of what happened. while noelle and kris cant say much to each other at all.
im always back and forth on speaking headcanons for kris but the one that i always seem to come back to is selective mutism… to me kris had a lot of trouble communicating well as a child and could only grow comfortable around certain people, asriel and noelle being clear examples because they’re both so patient with them. maybe because of this noelle felt like they could understand each other without really needing words, and just physical interaction was enough to achieve some form of closeness… or maybe that was all just on her end, she thinks when kris goes to play the piano. but if that’s the case, why does it feel like a concert just for her…?
jesus dont even get me start on them as teenagers either. noelle has lost her sister, and now kris has lost their brother… but not in the same way. they look at each other and wonder if they’re the same now. or, maybe thats too cruel. maybe its not the same thing at all. asriel’s coming back soon, after all. it will all be over soon, kris won’t have to feel this way for much longer, right? so then, why does kris look so miserable, sitting in the corner over there? all noelle feels like she can do is sit next to them quietly. to be there, and to somehow, vaguely, messily help each other. the misfit kids that dont really know how to talk to each other and yet understand each other regardless
thats why the dark world feels like such a dream to her. these crazy city lights, fantastical creatures, susie’s there, and she actually might have the means to defend herself and stand her ground, whether it be verbally or… otherwise
and most of all, much like with kris offering an adventurous haven to susie in ch1, the same is extended to noelle. by kris’s side, no less. it feels like theyre doing things together again, and its fun, and nostalgic… she wants to bring dess. and i think its okay to assume kris wants to bring asriel, too. recreating the make-believe world they lost so long ago… is it really possible?
no… how can it really be possible, when this isnt kris? something is wrong. its almost perfect, except kris… it’s them, but it’s not. she sees their face, their expressions, their laughs, their worries. and yet the voice that comes from them… isnt them. and it scares her! even if nothing particularly bad happened as a result. and if something bad DID happen, well…
she just wants what they had before back. is it really so impossible? can they reconcile after all these years? does kris want to? is kris capable of doing so? maybe they just need to hug again. will it feel like a real hug? the person she thought she understood is acting in ways she doesnt understand. they’re telling her to do weird things. they cycle through actions as if they just want to know what happens. and they cant even play piano anymore.
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soobibabe · 3 months
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tubatu world domination
6 members - 6 active
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soobin: do you guys ever think about beomgyu: no
soobin: damn can i FINISH my STATEMENT
you: to be fair you were typing like a snail i saw it with my own eyes
kai: i think what you were thinking soobin
soobin: thanks kai
yeonjun: wym 'saw it with my own eyes' ??? YOURE WITH HIM@:@::#*# PKSIMABOUT TOTHROW UP
you: i told you guys i was gonna go to the mall today ?
beomgyu: guys man or bear hehehhhhehehhhheeh>.<<<<<
taehyun: y/n reply to my dm pls.
yeonjun: WHENE DID YIU TELL US YOU WERE GOING TO THE MALLLLWHY DOES SOOBIN GET TO GO EITH YOU
soobin: because im just cunty like that. lolz
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you: @gyu ummm probably bear
beomgyu: HEHHEEHHEH you want me so bad
kai: what kind of bear
taehyun: y/n?
you: guys isnt that so weird!!! a blank chat keeps popping up!!!???
soobin: your phones probably broken
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brokxn like me... 🥀
yeonjun: i could take a bear
beomgyu: no thx peace and love but FOK no
kai: why isnt anyone questioning this odd taehyun behavior
you: who behavior?? never heard of it sry
yeonjun: taehyun like taehyun your bandmate... early dementia signs i fear now ditch soobin lets go get you checked up ^.^ beomgyu: shes upset because tyun said he was too busy to go out with her today
soobin:
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taehyun: i really was busy. pdnim called me in for a meeting about the next Academy Reincarnation season.
you: k
soobin: me personally if i got hit with a k by txts silliest member i would kms lowk
beomgyu: NAWWWW ME TOOO
yeonjun: i'd get hard idk
kai: can we put him on a speaking ban again
yeonjun: PLSEASEESESESE NOOOOOO I'KK STOP PLS LAST TIME WAS HORRRRIBLE
beomgyu: why hasnt soobin gotten one yet hes always talking anf talking anf talking and talking AND HES A NERD LIKE DAMN!!!!!!!!!! PICK A STUGGLE!!!!!!!!!!
soobin: yk youre so nice to me when were alone...
yeonjun: 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂
kai: 👀
taehyun: y/n reply to me me and i'll buy you whatever you want from prada
you: im their ambassador you twat
taehyun: right, yes sorry i forgot how about i bring you flowers and [your favourite food] to the dorm later?
you: deal
kai: HEY WTF ITS THST EASY? the last time you were mad at me you didnt talk to me for a whole SIX HOURS EVEN AFTER I APOLOGISED ON MY KNEES
beomgyu: guys if you weren't already an idol under bighit which bts member would you date
you: all 7
taehyun: jungkook
soobin: jin no wait hobi lowkey he's a cutie
beomgyu: you have to choose ONE y/n
yeonjun: jimin or tae kook is cool but i probably wouldn't be able to handle his fans
you: no ur so right actually i could not handle dating another idol LMFAOO
soobin: ???? wdym i spoke with ur mum already she gave me her blessings we can date :3 even as idols heheheheh you: she did not
soobin: did tooooooo
you: nuh uh when did you even meet her
taehyun: he's lying i was there
yeonjun: hahaha liar liar pants on fire
you: when the hell did you guys meet my mom
kai: well SOMEONE left us on a cliffhanger last week and didn't tell us who she was dating so we did the next best thing...
you: SAYYYT YOURE FUCKING WITH ME RIGHT NOW OMG IS THAT WHY MY MOTHER HAS BEEN SPAMMING MY PHONE ABOUT "COMING HOME FOR KIMCHI" ? CAUSE SHE KNOWS I DONT EVEN FW KIMCHI LIKE THAT
yeonjun:yea!!!!!!! tell them queen!!!!!!! why did you guys not invite me. fake fucks.
you: WHAT DID SHE EVEN SAY
soobin: something about how she thought you were a lesbian so she doesn't even know what we're talking about
you: well shes not half wrong
taehyun: anywho she did NOT give ANY blessings to anyone however she did say that you were getting older and needed to get more serious about future planning cause all you put your effort into is work
soobin: that was basically her speaking in maternal code for "hey you can marry my daughter once contracts are terminated" trust me id know
kai: maternal code?
soobin: yep im an expert
beomgyu: what the fuck does that even mean
soobin:
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taehyun: sometimes i wonder about the state of your mental wellbeing soobin: you just need to match my 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 you wouldn't get it. yeonjun: taehyun gets our freak soobin 💯 he's the one who suggested recording the killa with our shirts off.. fucking freak
you: i suggested that actually :3 but tyun suggested the lights off for tinnitus
yeonjun: Y/N MY PRETTY PRINCESS QUEEN DARLING DEAR I DIDNT MEAN IT I SWEAR THAT WAS THE BESSSSSST SUGGESTION EVER THANK YOU FOR SAYING THAT IM SORRY
beomgyu: you make me sick beomgyu left tubatu world domination kai: never a moment of peace in this household…
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A/N: this has been marinating in my drafts and i HATE it but i need to get rid of it 🤔🤔🙏🏼💯🔥 pls accept this scrap cause i may be a little burnt out 😭😭🤣🤣😜👊
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mel-is-sanonymous1994 · 5 months
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Kisses Taste Like Candy
Part 1
Part 2
-Orla McCool x Michelle Mallon
-Didn’t proof read it so I’m sure it’s not the greatest
-I have never lived in Ireland or even pretended to so I’m not so good at the slang part
Summary: Jenny Joyce is Evil and it doesn’t get better during summer home from university. What’s the worst that could happen during spin the bottle.
“You can’t be serious!” I said.
“Come on Michelle it’s just a wee peck you don’t even have to do anything.” Claire whispered. Since college she has grown a bit of a spine it seems must be the college girls.
“It’s Orla for christs sake!” I said glancing at the girl in question she was focused on something else entirely already bored with the game they had just started playing. Whoever said spin the bottle would be fun lied.
“Is it because she’s a girl?” Claire asked me with a flash of hurt in her eyes.
“No, I’ve been to college parties Claire I’ve probably kissed more girls than you’ve even looked at.” I said.
“But you both went to an all girls catholic school.” James pointed out.
“A rides a ride James.” I said blushing a bit.
“So then what’s the problem?” Erin asked.
“Is someone backing down?” Jenny Joyce taunted. She had already came out on top in this game not only avoiding all of the girls but managing to get to make out with the hottest man to ever step foot in Derry.
“I’m not backing down I just don’t think it’s fair to Orla is all.” I explained. Jenny smirked her wicked smirk and looked to Orla who was busy taking the ends of her hair and individually separating the section strand by strand almost as if she was counting them.
“She gets a pass doesn’t she?” James asked.
“Yeah, she does.” Erin smiled.
“It’s not a pass though.” Claire said remembering the rules.
“That’s correct Claire, Michelle can pass but she would have to take whoever it lands on next and the person who goes after her has to take Orla.” Aisling said with a sad look on her face. She had only gotten nicer being away from Jenny and her influence but she was still the loyal puppet to the superior girl. I looked next to me as Orla tuned back into the game.
“Oi I’ve got no problem with making out with her, she’s a ride.” The male to my left said. I shot glare at James who earlier had decided to make me sit next to the absolute dickhead who was currently staring at Orla in a way that would make even the brightest girls feel uncomfortable.
“Sorry what did I miss?” Orla asked as she looked at everyone staring at her. She turned red from the attention. I had to admit the dance classes she had been taking were paying off, she chose to stay in Derry and work at the local animal shelter after school.
“You were picked for spin the bottle and Michelle passed on you.” Jenny said harshly. Orla didn’t understand though.
“I thought we were playing tag.” She frowned.
“Tonsil tag.” Jenny Joyce said with a snicker.
“I don’t have my tonsils anymore Jenny, your da took em.” Orla scrunched her eyebrows in confusion. The ballbag next to me stood up and walked over to Orla grabbing her arm hoisting her up.
“Hey! Wait!” I said as I saw Orlas look of confusion once she stood facing him. He had already put his hand on her face.
“You already passed.” The guy said holding Orla possessively.
“I didn’t officially, I just hesitated.” I said nervously standing up quickly to take his place. Typically we didnt have to stand for this stupid game but the fucker had to make it a big deal.
“Go on then Michelle.” Jenny said. I glared at her as the asshole petted Orla’s head and then winked at me and sat back down. I stood in front of the taller girl.
“You alright Michelle?” She smiled at me as she looked less uncomfortable with a familiar face in front of her.
“I’m alright Orla.” I said.
“Enough of the small talk.” Jenny said with her arms crossed.
“I’m gonna kiss you now Orla is that ok?” I asked silently hoping she’d say no.
“Alright Michelle.” She said. I leaned in and placed my hand on her cheek looking carefully in her eyes for any sign that she changed her mind. She closed her eyes as my lips were mere millimeters from hers. I rolled my eyes and just went for it connecting our closed lips in a very innocent kiss. She had lip gloss on. I could smell the little alcohol she had drank mixing with the cotton candy flavored lip smacker she insisted on applying anytime she could, the smell was intoxicating. Her lips were soft and warm. I felt her jaw open slightly and on instinct deepened the kiss a bit quickly going from a quick peck to full snog. I could taste the lip gloss now mixing with the lingering taste of Tequila on my own tongue. I was addicted. I came back into my brain for a minute when I realized that Orla wasn’t participating as much as I was. I pulled away quickly and breathed heavy as if I just ran a marathon. Orla’s brown eyes were staring back at me. I put my hand to my lips covering the evidence as best I could. Orla’s face was flushed. I began to panic, how could I have done that with one of my best friends, the sweetest and most innocent of us all. I felt the sharp sting of tears in my eyes as I ran out of the room. I heard James calling after me but I kept running until I couldn’t breathe anymore and noticed I had ran all the way to finnoulas. I bent over and clutched my sides as I fought to get air to stay in my lungs.
“Stupid Michelle! How could you do that! She’s never gonna speak to you again!” I yelled at myself. I tried to dissect every second of the kiss. The smell the taste the feelings, everything. I panicked more when I realized that I actually really liked kissing Orla and I found myself wishing I could do it again. I almost started running again but a small voice stopped me.
“Michelle, are you alright?” Orla asked as I stood up straight still struggling to breathe properly.
“I’m sorry Orla. I shouldn’t have agreed to kiss you, that wasn’t fair to you. I should’ve just said we should leave.” I apologized.
“Michelle.” She started but I cut her off.
“And I’m sorry I stuck my tongue in your mouth, that was uncalled for and I totally understand if you never want to speak to me ever again.” I said with tears in my eyes now. She opened her mouth to speak but I couldn’t stop.
“You are one of my best friends Orla and I’ve gone and messed that up just because Jenny Joyce is an evil cunt.” I said with tears blurring my eyes until Orla was just a smudge in front of me. Before she could say anything I heard more footsteps approaching quickly. I saw it was the other girls and James.
“Is everything alright?” James asked noticing I was crying. He knew I wasn’t one to cry over just anything. I shook my head. I didn’t dare look at Orla who was still trying to get a word in while Erin, Claire, and James fussed over me.
“I’m gonna take her home.” I heard James say as he put his arm around me and walked us towards our house which wasn’t too far away.
“Wait..” I heard Orla say but Erin had pulled her in the other direction.
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hiemaldesirae · 5 months
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AU where *Vox* is the one who disappears for 7 years, and ALL of Hell suffers for it. The remaining 2 Vees end up with their souls contracted to Alastor, Carmilla and Zestial have to become allies and join forces-most overlords do by the time Vox comes back there ARE no solo Overlords left, except technically Rosie and Alastor but even they are 'allies' in the loosest sense. Everyone else is paired up and it all because of the madness of Radio Demon at the disappearance of his muse. He's shacked up inside of The Vees Tower, taking over Vox's floor as his own, adding a radio tower to the side of it.
And then, 7 years after his disappearance, Vox reappears and joins Charlie Morningstar at her hotel for rehabilitation of sinners of all things, with Angel Dust as her first client, and--
The very foundations of Hell shake.
OHHH this one is fun. yesyesyes im so onboard with this one!!! i think about swap aus very fondly no matter how many times i see premises where vox and al get their storylines swapped ill ALWAYS eat it up.
okay so i do have some questions i want to get over with first. did al and vox breakup before the whole. (waves hands) seven year leave thing. like did they fight before he left because that brings a wholly different dynamic to the table rather than 'oh vox just disappeared one day', which in fairness i can see driving alastor crazy in a much different way, but also if they'd fought beforehand and alastor had expected to see vox back with the vees the day after or something, only to find him missing with no one aware of where he was... hoo boy. and also- does alastor take over the entertainment district here? like, he's got val and velvette as contracted souls, so do they stop running the district because they can no longer hold the respect of those they were once under and just do menial tasks under al's servitude, or is there a completely different dynamic here that ive passed over?
anyway with that over with... (bashes my head into the wall) YES I NEED THIS. ohmuy god. the aus where vox is sponsoring the hazbin hotel because of a deal he made with lucifer or something have been haunting my head for weeks upon end and i cant help but imagine something similar here- i can just imagine how pissed alastor would be to learn of the fact that vox was back and didnt even think to go and SHOW HIMSELF to him first??? vox was HIS. his muse, his rival, his stupid, stupid picture box- and he went off to make a deal with that bright-faced, stupid little princess of hell? instead of going back to alastor? no, no, no, that cant do, absolutely not, VALENTINO, you have to get your oblivious little employee under control before i rip out both your throats-- anyway. i imagine al probably hates intearcting with either of the vees but he does to make sure theyre not dead or trying to kill him (its all for voxs sake. he wouldn't be glad to return and find his friends slaughtered, after all.)
sorry i dont really have any other thoughts to addonto this (theres a reason why i havent written/drawn a swap au with them and its because ive no idea how the story would change given all the different nuances that we dont yet know... so. yeah) except maybe that alastor would probably be pissed as hell at the attention vox gets when he returns- because he was a celebrity figure before he was gone, too, and his return is like the equivalent to a comeback on princess diana's revenge dress level. instead of being pissed that other sinners are paying attention to vox in a 'they should be looking at me' kind of way though he's more pissed in a 'no one should look at him except for me' kind of way which really weirds charlie vaggie and angel out who are kinda just going like... 'are you sure about that guy man' and vox just shrugs like 'well last time i was face to face with him we had a really bitter breakup fight so idek if hes sure about me tbh'
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ecto-hazard · 6 days
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I just rewatched ii s1 (fucked up right?)
im just gonna make a post compiling some barebones concepts that im curious about. cause with the latest reveal, im wondering how much previous stuff might become relevant.
Obviously this was made years ago by a bunch of kids so its possible that most of the details can be disregarded as random bullshit. It does seem like they put a lot of work in creating retcons though so I have reason to believe theyre building off their previous work on purpose but i could be wrong and thats fair. im gonna post about it anyway tho
ii16 spoilers discussed under the cut
Who Mephone created (or rather, didn't create)
Mephone supposedly made every contestant for the show, but there's a couple vague characters.
Fan: weirdly enough he's in a gray area cause he appears as a background character before s2, but he also glitched out in that one episode, so its unlikely he wasnt created by Mephone. But yknow.
Apple: Apple is a fan character who was submitted to the show, and this is addressed in canon. It's possible that mephone made her and the other fan contestants based on whatever the submitters asked?
Bow: she randomly shows up after an ad read. Mephone doesnt seem to even want her to join, but he receives a call from Adam to insist she join. Mephone seems quite resistant to the idea (which would be weird if he made her?) Most interestingly, she's the only one in this list that Mephone couldn't recover.
Dough MIGHT be one mephone didnt create, but it seems pretty likely that Mephone would create him as he was specifically requested by adam to get bow back. Dough does seem like something he'd throw together really quickly to cover his ass
The reason any of this could be relevant is that if they arent created by Mephone, they probably cant be deleted by Cobs.
Adam
Stuff about Adam (the character not the guy) has been kinda quiet lately? He was supposedly the producer of ii, and pays mephone apparently? He clearly has a role to play since he showed up in one of Mephone's memories and seems to be a creation by cobs. So observing his actions in s1 might be valuable, especially since cobs would be able to manipulate the show through him.
Some notable actions of his:
Insisting on Bow being in the show. This is doubly interesting if Bow isn't one of Mephone's creations. She could be an industry plant of some kind?
Telling Mephone to keep 4S out of the season finale. This is supposedly to keep the finale from going crazy. If Mephone had been successful, he wouldve been killed by Mephone 5. Its possible this was on purpose so 4 could be destroyed and replaced
Investing in another season. at the end of s2, despite things going wrong, he tells Mephone they're going to do another season. He sweetens the deal by offering a raise and agreeing to get Mephone an assistant (Toilet). Cobs clearly got invested in this show, so it makes sense he'd encourage more of it from the shadows.
Mephone 4S
Yeah talking about 4S isn't anything new, the fandom's obsessed with him. I am too.
The implications of Mephone4 being in 4S's body never really got explored in s2. I guess they were similar enough that it didn't really matter. But he clearly still has some relevance in the modern series. One of Mephone's memories shows him getting developed as a replacement for 4, and he actually appears in Invitational, Sorta? Clearly Mephone's bothered by the sacrifice he made.
At the very least, the show's reminding us that he existed, so maybe he still does exist? I don't think he's going to necessarily make a comeback or anything but I dunno. It seems like he might be able to talk to Mephone in his head so maybe there's something to that.
Evil Paper
Im just gonna be upfront that I don't have a dissociative disorder and its not my place to talk about how it works or what is good or bad representation so I'm not gonna get super deep into talking about this. I'm just curious if the team has any plans for addressing Evil Paper. They seemed to make an effort into writing Yin Yang more thoughtfully (whether or not they actually succeeded, again, not my say). I could see them giving Paper similar treatment. If they did I doubt it'd be very plot relevant though.
Is the Taco we got the Taco we were supposed to have?
I've actually seen this conversation circulate a little bit already. This sort of debate could apply to any character really, but Taco is perhaps the most interesting example because she's so involved in the latest episodes AND because Brian actually addressed a tweet about this.
Taco behaves like a goofy idiot for the majority of s1, only revealing at the end that she was faking it so she would make it to the end. She specifically says she was "built to win" (the quote Brian addresses), and shows a much more competent side when she actually competes. In fact if it weren't for Bow's interference, Taco would have won the challenge (another case of Bow being weird).
This all seems to imply that Taco may have been intended to win the series by Mephone. Cobs points out to Suitcase and Knife that Mephone had "high hopes" for them, so it's not unreasonable to say that maybe certain characters were liked over others. Mephone never seems to give special treatment openly, but that doesn't mean that when he made certain contestants he didn't at the very least expect them to do well.
What is highly unlikely though is that Taco was created to be a twist villain. This results in Mephone's death after all (though the activity of Bow and Mephone 5 also could be to blame). Especially since he had pressure from Adam to keep things running smoothly, it just wouldn't make sense that Mephone would specifically create someone to toss a wrench in things. Most likely Taco developed like this on her own accord.
But that also raises the question, if she wasn't meant to be a villain, what was she supposed to be? How much of the taco we have now is the Taco that Mephone created? We don't actually see how he reacts to her "reveal" because he's in the middle of running away from 5. But everyone else clearly never saw it coming. OJ specifically comments that this doesn't seem like "the Taco he's been competing with all this time," and while that's written in reference to her reveal, it also could mean she WASNT the Taco he'd been competing with. We do get a hint or two of her true self in previous episodes, but its possible she wasn't ever supposed to be like that.
I think its possible Mephone4 created her as a goofy goober joke character initially, and over time, she changed. She developed into a more tactful and villainous character with her exposure to the contest.
A few things in the most recent episodes might allude to this. One thing being how in ii15 she discusses how she became aware of how much the contest is changing everyone, herself included. Secondly, in ii16 she tells Pickle that at the time she didn't consider how her actions were going to hurt him. This is a really shitty apology and no excuse for it, but it ALSO could mean that at the time, Taco really didn't think about it. In S1, she claims that she was just using him, but we don't know how aware of herself she was back then. Its possible that there was a past version of Taco who wasn't deadset on winning no matter the cost, and being in the game changed her.
Anyway these have been my slopthoughts. It's like 9 pm and ive been writing this for like an hour. Maybe most of this wont get addressed at all in the series, but I figured i might as well compile it down since I just finished s1
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citrusinicake · 5 months
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Day 2 :: Zombie Apocalypse
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do you have any idea how fucking hard it is to be a zombie in this economy? you just go out there trying to have a bite to eat so you go up to some randos and they just start SHOOTING YOU! like straight up just SHOOTING YOU! like what the hell man? i mean i know im trying to rip your brains out and shit but cant you let a guy just fucking eat???? speaking of, this guy's brain tastes weird like im pretty sure its at least fifty percent plastic, maybe even a hundred percent i don't know. was he your boyfriend or something? does this mean you're single? wanna go out sometime? you're annoying as shit but i like that in a man, keeps you on your toes y'know? keeps you humble as well like you just wake up in bed one day and go "oh god this is the guy im dating and i don't even want to break up with him or anything what the hell's wrong with me," which i think is a pretty important thing to have-- at least for me 'cause im awesome as shit and if i don't have that sort of anchor i'll probably lke turn into god or something and i dont wanna be god. not out of self-esteem issues or anything, just out of principle 'cause i think that everyone should have a fair chance at killing me which not gonna lie is pretty easy but that's besides the point, the point is that i think anyone who wants to be god is fucking stupid and should just fucking die. like, hello??? who the hell do you think you are rying to reign above other people? are you stupid? are you dumb? hello? anyways, if you wanna know more about what i think of this i post a lot on r/atheism, im user u/waffleontopp-- wait , do i have to explain reddit to you? 'cause you seem more like a tumblrina to me, honestly reddit's pretty similar to tumblr so you won't have a lot of trouble figuring it out on your own but don't be shocked ifbyou see cock and balls on there since porn isn't banned there unlike tumblr. how's that whole thing treating you by the way? must be tough not seeing some girl's boobs every once in a while-- wait are you gay or bi? must be tough not seeing some guy's boobs every once in a while, that won't be problem if you start dating me though. haha just kidding, my chest is basically concave now after a survivor beat me repeatedly with a baseball bat so ive got like negative double D's now. oh but i do know this one guygirlthing whose boobs are out basically 24/7 who likes to hang out with me and this other guy so maybe that'll make up for it. they're not zombies and im pretty sure they didnt get infected so you don't have to worry about that but they miiiight have rabies or something im not sure to be honest so maybe watch out for that instead. if youre wondering why two non-infected humans are hanging out with a zombie then we're in the same boat, might have something to do with the possible rabies i mentioned earlier. also if they tell you that im their pet zombie that is simply not true, if anything it's the other way around, they're my pet guard dogs and they do basically anything i say even if it kills them. or at least i wish it would kill them, they're way too hardy in my opinion, i need them to die so i can eat their brains-- oh but then i'll have to do manual labor. hmm, on second thought, they can stay actually i don't wanna deal with all that. normally i dont even do my own kills nowadays, i just leave a trap or get the other two to do it for me, you guys just caught me offguard which is lowkey embarassing but trust me i am a huge, like Huge alpha sigma gamma male and would totally dominate everyone else around me. but not in a god way of course, just in a lone sigma alpha gamma wolf kinda way like those anime wolf furry drawings. you know the ones. and like im not a furry but not gonna lie they totally popped off with those
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tartsinarat · 4 months
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Meet Till Eulenspiegel, or Tilly
They’re a mischievous little palisman who loves spreading chaos but internally they deeply wish for a person who could fill the gap their original owner left so they’re always trying out new owners until that person gets tired of them due to their strong attitude and lack of interest in being used as a staff because they prefer to be flying about in their animal form rather than be used as a tool.
Their original owner was a huge human folklore nut (specifically German folklore) so when they carved them, he made them be a Wolpertinger which is basically the jackolope’s more chaotic looking cousin and even named them after a famous German folklore character/ possibly real person.
But their original owner got killed at some point (not too sure how but because of Tilly’s name being based on a guy who was famous for hating authority it was probably due to rebelling against the empire) and after attempting for many decades to find the perfect owner who doesn’t give up on them or find them hard to deal with and then abandon them, they ended up in the care of the bat queen.
Until Pip came along because he had to run an errand with Luz for Eda because she was too busy with other stuff to go help the bat queen.
Originally Pip wasn’t even going to come along because the bat queen has tried to kill him multiple times for reasons he doesn’t understand as he avoids being around her and palisman like if they were the plague but it’s because the bat queen senses that he’s a threat due to his curse and how there’s a palisman spirit stuck in him so she wants to kill him to avoid more palisman deaths and save the poor guy who’s stuck there but since this episode is during early season two, they really needed the snails and Pip didn’t want to just abandon Luz so he went over anyway to help out.
The bat queen didnt make too much of a fuss about Pip coming along with Luz because she needs all the help she can get. This is because a bunch of palisman that were under her care were found by scouts and were about to be delivered to Belos and she can’t leave her babies or the rest of the palisman behind just in case there’s more scouts so that’s why she needed their help.
One of the palisman who managed to escape being captured was Tilly, so they ended up guiding Luz and Pip to the rest of them but on the way they ended up taking a liking to Pip due to at first thinking he was a fair maiden (Tilly is slightly blind due to a part of her carving process going slightly wrong) because of his longer hair in comparison to Luz but ngl a funnier explanation is that Tilly immediately sensed that Pip is genderfluid before he even knew it lmaoooo.
But yeah anyways after the rescue mission goes successfully, Tilly ends up deciding to stay with Pip much to both the Bat queen’s and Pip’s disappointment because they really liked how he tricked the scouts by dressing up as one but also decided to play a couple of extremely dangerous (but only the scouts) pranks in meantime to distract the guards from noticing Luz speeding away with all of the captured palisman.
Even though Pip is extremely hesitant about the whole having a palisman thing, they still end up getting along swimmingly as Pip doesn’t really like using staffs or magic in general and so tilly is able to roam around as much as they want but they don’t actually mind being used as a staff by Pip after a while because they both end up having such a good friendship but Pip still always asks them first if they’re alright with doing a spell together or if she is comfortable with him using her to fly
Tilly is also sort of co-owned by Luz as Pip at the beginning didn’t trust himself enough to be around Tilly for long periods of time due to the trauma of being forced to munch on a palisman when he was younger so he has Luz look after them when he feels like he can’t cope with the situation at the moment.
Luz loves Tilly and takes care of them as if they were her own child/ palisman whenever she’s on palisman-sitting duty although Pip thinks she spoils Tilly too much (but to be honest Pip probably spoils her even more but doesn’t realise it.)
So Tilly really likes Luz and even occasionally allows her to use them as a staff when owlbert isn’t around.
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An example of a Wolpertinger so it shows I’m not making this shit up, this one is a mix of a rabbit, deer, a squirrel and a bird but I’m not sure of what type.
In real life they’re a joke mythological creature that was created for tourism so they have the most funniest lore I’ve ever read for a myth, for example the way to catch one of these bad boys is to have a fair maiden because they have an attraction to them but on the other hand they’re also tricksters who make tourists who explore forests lose their direction and starve to death…so uh yeah there’s more to them than that but those two are my favourite traits.
Tilly is specifically a mix of a rabbit, a deer, an owl and a skunk.
The owl part has a specific reason because the literal translation of “Eulenspiegel” is owl-mirror but is also garbled version of an expression for "wipe-the-arse"… This is because of the nature the character Tilly is named after as he was a legendary German peasant who later had a bunch of folklore created due to being a insane prankster who would defy any and all authority which I think fits into Tilly’s species and personality perfectly.
As well I designed her knowing that she’ll eventually ends up as Pip’s palisman hence why theyre a hybrid (just like him) but also I think by them being part bird it’ll be something that helps him feel more comfortable about having a palisman, especially one that’s part owl who hates authority like Eda who he has a great respect for.
Oh yeah and Rip Muffin, aka the original palisman I had originally planned for Pip to have but couldn’t because Waffles was a thing in season 3 and it felt awkward to have both hunter and Pip with Blue jays, but because I’m not bothered to design another palisman oc ever again due to how much it sucks to figure out their staff forms she’s now the Palisman that Pip got forced to eat by Belos when he was younger.
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