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#anthony fluff
bea-n-art · 3 months
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90 miles an hour kiss. Crowley has never been happier.
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ithebookhoarder · 6 months
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Truth or Dare (Anthony Bridgerton x Wife!Reader)
Summary: Married only a few months, you are very much one of the Bridgerton brood - something that often drives your poor husband mad, especially when you happen to be every bit as chaotic and unruly as his siblings... Also known as, you, Benedict and Eloise take a game of ‘truth or dare’ a bit too far. 
A/N: What can I say? It’s well and truly fluff-tober over here on my blog 😅
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Warnings: Alcohol, mild smut, swearing, Anthony losing his mind, typical Bridgerton sibling shenanigans 
Masterlist
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There weren’t many nights Anthony spent away from your side.
They were few and far between, but that didn’t lessen how irksome you found them when the odd occasion called for him to leave you over night. You didn’t know what it was exactly, but you never truly slept well without your husband there to hold you.
Of course, it had to be one of those nights that you truly found yourself in a spot of mischief. Though, in fairness, it had all started rather innocently.
Un-beknowst to you at the time, it was Benedict that had been first outside on the garden swing, sipping from a stolen bottle of whiskey he’d pilfered from the kitchens. He’d been sat there perhaps ten minutes by himself, staring at the stars and lamenting about some problem or other.
Then Eloise had come along.
As was her habit - you later discovered - she had been swift to follow her brother’s example, sneaking out of the house in her nightgown for a reprieve in the night air… and a cigarette or two. Apparently her second-eldest brother was something of a soft touch when it came to her, not that you could blame him for it. You doted on Eloise too.
Then, finally, completing the eclectic cast of characters, there had been you.
Now, in your defence, you hadn’t intended on going out into the garden that night, but had found no other alternative suitable given the blasted summer heat. It was worse tonight that it had been all week, and without Anthony in bed beside you, you saw little point in enduring with the effort of trying to get any rest.
So, you’d decided to make your way quietly through the house and sit outside a while, and pray for a breeze. You hadn’t, however, expected to find both Bridgerton siblings already sat there, having had a similar idea.
“My, what do we have here? Another night owl?”
It was Benedict who spoke first, smiling warmly at the sight of you appearing out of the darkness. He was quick to rise, offering you his swing as a perch to rest upon, beside Eloise.
You were about to protest that it wasn’t necessary and that you could find somewhere else to sit, but a warning glare from Eloise was enough to silence you.
She was all too eager to pat the seat next to her in invitation, looking remarkably pleased to have another addition to their little party.
“Come. Sit,” she ordered. “We were simply discussing how tedious Lady Tremaine’s luncheon will be tomorrow and how we could possibly avoid the whole thing. Now that you’re here, you can help us plot our escape. Benedict’s only suggestion thus far has been some kind of contagious summer cold.”
“I think I actually said that I would use such an excuse, sister,” Benedict corrected with a teasing grin. “Not that we would share it.”
“Traitor.”
“Hardly. It is every man - or woman - for themselves. Right, Y/N?”
“Alas, I think your mother would be rather suspicious at all three of us suddenly being absent,” you sighed by way of explanation as both their eyes turned to you. “Besides, I only came outside because of this heat, not to join some conspiracy.”
“Hardly,” Eloise chuckled. “We simply had the same idea, but I am rather glad you came to join us. Perhaps we should form some secret kind of club - Bridgertons against boredom?”
“And do what? Constantly find excuses not to attend social events we deem too tedious or odious to be dragged along to?”
“Sounds like a marvellous idea to me.”
“It would, sister dear,” Benedict teased. “You always have a talent for causing chaos and anarchy. You’d suit the cause perfectly, even if we both know our mother would never stand for it. She somehow sees through even our best efforts.”
“In which case, it’s time I take a leaf out of your book, Benedict. After all, you always say social events become far more bearable after a good drink or two,” Eloise smirked, gesturing towards the bottle of whiskey Benedict had been steadily nursing. “Perhaps I should follow my brothers  example and learn to hold a drink, maybe then things will be more fun.”
“Oh no.” Benedict was quick to shut down that idea, holding the bottle possessively to his chest and shaking his head. “No. I am not allowing you to start drinking. Mother would have my head if she caught you, not to mention Anthony would have all ours heads on a platter in no time.”
The thought of it made you laugh. Your husband was hardly a tyrant, even if he’d been known to have a temper but he was easy enough to handle. A few soft words in his ear or a kiss on the cheek and he was putty in your hands, helplessly and completely in love with you. Just as you were in love with him.
“Don’t tell me you’re scared of Anthony, Benedict?” you giggled, causing Eloise to join you. “I assure you, he’s more a kitten than a lion and he’d probably prefer you to allow Eloise to sample alcohol here, under your supervision, than when she inevitably decides to rebel and has her first drink later on, in the middle of some public ball…”
The warning was clear and you all knew very likely true. Still, Eloise was beaming in victory as Benedict cursed to himself, muttering about Bridgerton women and the likely death he’d receive should Anthony ever find out he had allowed Eloise to sample whiskey. “Just a few sips, El. I mean it.”
“Oh hush,” she snorted, taking the bottle before he could change his mind. She was quick to throw back her head and down a rather brave mouthful, causing you to laugh even harder as she scrunched her face up in disgust. “Oh! That is revolting.”
“I told you.”
“Now you, Y/N,” Eloise grinned, turning and offering the offending item towards you. “Go on. Join us trouble makers - I won’t say a word about it if you don’t.”
“Oh, for goodness sake… Give me that then,” you sighed, earning a cheer from them both, knowing it was better to simply surrender rather than try and fight their mischievous whims. It only increased as you took an ambitious swig from the bottle, wincing at the acrid burning sensation it left in your throat.
If only Anthony could have seen you. He’d have probably had some kind of seizure - especially as you took another quick swig before handing the bottle back.
“There. Your turn again, brother dearest.”
“My my. You really are quite surprising,” Benedict sniggered, before winking up at you in admiration. “Who knew it? You can hold your drink better than Colin. He seems cursed to choke any time he drinks anything stronger than a brandy.”
“Well, it is your sex that falsely deemed us the weaker,” Eloise quipped. “It’s not our fault you were ignorant.”
“I’d like to remind you I wasn’t part of that decision and you also looked ready to choke a moment ago, El.”
“Doesn’t matter, you’re still one of the enemy,” she giggled, earning another raucous laugh from you. Oh, you loved her. If you’d ever been so blessed to have had a sister, you hoped she’d have been just like her. “Now, it is your turn again, brother.”
“Oh … joy.”
“Else we shall have to have some kind of forfeit.”
“A forfeit?” you scoffed, finding the idea absurd. “Like what?”
“How about… truth or dare?”
Benedict froze. “Oh no. Not again. Pall Mall is one thing but we swore we would never play that game in this family again-“
“But Benedict-“
“What’s truth or dare?”
Your innocent question ceased their bickering instantly. Their eyes widened as they turned to you, a knowing and nervous look passing between them. Somehow, you knew this evening was about to get wildly out of hand.
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Sometime later, you’d been fully apprised of the rules of ‘truth or dare’. In fact, you’d been something of a natural at it, even if you knew the copious amounts of whiskey you’d all consumed was more than likely the responsible culprit. Else, you’d probably have known better and snuck back off inside before you could make a fool of yourself.
By the end of the night, Benedict had climbed a tree, confessed to being oddly scared of spiders, and been forced to sing the national anthem in French.
Eloise had also made an admirable effort, despite her obviously lower tolerance for drink. She still permitted Benedict to try and arrange her hair, before daring to steal a sock from Colin’s room whilst he’d slept. Then she’d loosened a leg on a dining chair. (Alas, none of you could remember which one but that somehow made it even funnier - even if it would not be come morning when you were forced to sit at the table for breakfast in some kind of roulette.)
You could only pray you didn’t choose said seat.
You could also only pray neither of your conspirators shared your contributions with your husband. You weren’t exactly sure how Anthony would feel at the fact you gone for a midnight paddle in the pond, nor that you’d mixed up the papers on his desk, all before finishing the night with a final dare that involved stealing several cakes from the kitchens… you still swore Mrs Reynolds would notice, come morning, that there were no longer twelve perfect cakes.
That, and Benedict had somehow knocked flour all over the counter, causing you all to erupt in drunken laughter as you’d bolted back outside.  
Needless to say, you all looked a sorry sight as you lay in the grass together, staring at the approaching dawn. Had you not been so tired, or drunk, you may have suggested retiring back to your rooms before the house awoke shortly.
“Now that… was fun.”
“Fun? That was more than fun. I haven’t laughed like that in ages.”
“Told you it was a good idea.”
You hummed in agreement with your sister in law.
“I can see why you all favoured this game so much,” you sniggered, winking at Eloise as she sat in the grass beside you. “I can also see why you all agreed to stop playing it… I don’t know what Anthony would say if he saw what we’d been up to.”
“Something sensible and disapproving most likely,” Benedict sniggered. “Our brother, and your husband, can be a right prig, no offence.”
“Oh hush. At least I didn’t let my sister dress me up in her petticoat when she was five.”
Benedict’s jaw dropped.
“Who told you about that?” he demanded indignantly.
“I have my sources.”
Benedict’s eyes narrowed as he turned his head to glare at his younger sister. “Well, you can tell your source that she’s going to have to find someone else to fetch her lemonade at the Cowper’s ball tomorrow night unless she apologises. You can also tell her that I’ll accept either a verbal or a written apology as long as it’s suitably abject. And that means very, very abject,” he added darkly.
“Tell me, Benedict, was it a lacy petticoat?”
With a wordless grunt of annoyance, Benedict groaned, but it was hard to hear over the laughter echoing from you and Eloise. You resembled more a pack of hyenas than two noble ladies - you probably looked just as feral after your night of mischief.
And of course, as was always your luck, that was exactly how your husband found you mere seconds later.
How Anthony had arrived without any of you hearing a carriage pulling up to the house at this time of the night - morning? You couldn’t be sure - was a mystery. Yet, there he was, hands on hips and looking thunderous as he stormed towards the three of you with all the fury of an exasperated headmaster.  
“What in God’s name are you all playing at?”
You all froze.
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It was as if someone had poured a bucket of ice water over you as your eyes widened, and you all turned to stare sheepishly at him.
“Oh, darling. You’re home?”
“Don’t ‘oh darling’ me,” Anthony sighed, attempting to scold you but without much success. His attempt at seriousness was somewhat undermined by his brother’s heckling, singing ‘here comes mother’ and that ‘someone’s in trouble’. That, and with the way you were lying, he was upside down. “What are you doing up at this god forsaken hour? And why are you … is that flour? And why are you soaking wet?”
“I went for a swim.”
“A - you went for a -“
“And Benedict did my hair,” Eloise interjected suddenly, waving her arms about as she gestured to the tangle of hair upon her head. “Isn’t it marvellous?”
Anthony’s expression very much said that he did not think it was marvellous. Nor did he find any of this vaguely amusing.
In fact, by the way he took a long deep breath, you knew he was doing his best not to lose his temper and wake the entirety of the household. His brow always creased like that when he was faced with dealing with his family, but the expression only made him seem more adorable and handsome to you, rather than authoritative. However, you’d never told him so, knowing it would hardly be deemed a compliment in his eyes.
You also doubted he’d appreciate your usual response right now, which was normally to kiss said brow until it eased back into its relaxed form.
“We were just playing a game to escape the heat, darling,” you soothed. “We couldn’t sleep and all had the same idea to seek refuge outdoors… we simply got carried away passing the time.”
“What game?”
“Pardon?”
“I said, what was the game you were all playing?” Anthony suddenly quipped, the warning clear in his tone. That, and his eyes landed squarely on his two siblings, who at least had the decency to look sheepish… and afraid. “Because there is but one game I can think of that would result in a mess like this one, and I’m confused, because I know for a fact that we banned that game under this roof, and any other roof that houses the Bridgertons.”
No one moved.
No one even breathed.
It was as if you were all too scared to risk answering Anthony, even if the empty bottle of whiskey did most of the talking by itself.
“I don’t recall the name,” you blinked. “Right, Benedict?”
“Oh, uh… we… we were just- Eloise?”
Eloise froze, the guilt written all too clearly on her face for her to even try and salvage the situation - though that could also be down to the whisky she had consumed… it was honestly hard to be sure at this point.
“Well, dear brother,” she began, only to trail off as Anthony lifted his hand.
The silence was instantaneous. 
No one dared to say another word, let alone move. 
You’d never seen Eloise or Benedict so still in your entire life. Hell, you weren’t even sure they were breathing - probably out of fear Anthony would decide to inform their mother about their mischievous exploits. 
If Anthony Bridgerton was scary when vexed, then Violet Bridgerton was a nightmare brought to life in human form. After all, as the matriarch of a family of eight children, she had learned a long time ago how to keep her unruly children in line - a harrowing experience you had only had occasion to witness once or twice since your marriage into the Bridgerton family. Once had been when Colin and Gregory had broken a priceless vase when racing around the house, despite being explicitly banned from doing so. The other had been when she had caught Eloise and Benedict smoking outside on the terrace one night. 
It was easy to say where your husband had inherited it from. 
“Not. Another. Word,” your husband growled, bending down and sweeping you up into his arms in a move that made you squeal in surprise. “Right now, I am taking my wife to bed and I suggest you two do the same - after you clean up your mess. I’ll deal with the lot of you in the morning.” 
A laugh escaped you as you tried not to look like you were enjoying the sudden turn of events too much. After all, you doubted he’d be too happy once you were more sober and he discovered the true extent of your nightly activities. 
It was why you were only too happy to let him put you to bed, grumbling all the while about letting his siblings run wild. He really was most handsome when he was flushed - a fact you were reminded of as he hastily changed for bed, flashing you a tempting glimpse of his bare torso in the process. 
You could tell without asking he was tired from his journey home, as well as fighting the urge to rip his hair out over the chaos he had found upon his return. 
Thankfully, his need to be in your arms outweighed the need to scold you over letting yourself be drawn into his siblings’ schemes. All it took was you pulling him down onto the mattress, and climbing into his lap to turn him into a needy, lovestruck puddle. 
You’d equally missed having him in your arms, but you’d be lying if you said that your sudden forwardness wasn't also due to a mixture of the whiskey you’d drunk, and the residual giddiness from a night of mischief. A confidence radiated from you as you began to run your hands over his bare chest, taking care to graze the areas you knew made him groan. 
“You’re lucky I love you so much,” he teased breathlessly, visibly unable to refuse your advances. 
“Is that so?”
Anthony chuckled, nodding as he surged his lips towards yours. “Yes, so come here, my delinquent drunken wife, and let me kiss you before you and those doe-eyes of yours drive me insane. Now.”
Your laughter and surrender was immediate. “As you wish.” 
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Alas, for poor Anthony, that was not the end of the ordeal. 
In fact, it was the next morning as you made your way into breakfast that you faced the final consequences of your delinquency. 
Despite wishing to remain abed for the entire day, you’d been granted no such reprieve as your maid had entered your room at the usual appointed time and proceeded to open the curtains with no regard for the fact that you had slept a mere handful of hours. Whereas you would normally greet the day with a reluctant smile, you were in no state to manage much more than a groan as you were harshly ripped from your slumber.
If you had somehow not yet come to the conclusion that last night had been a bad idea, then the sudden flare of pain in your head at the bright intrusion was all the proof you needed. That, and the sudden churning in your stomach. 
You would never let Benedict or Eloise coax you into drinking with them again. 
You had not realised, despite how the idiom went, that what went up was sure to come down again - and you had come crashing down. 
Hard.
“If you’re ready to dress, my lady, then breakfast will be served shortly,” your maid chirped, a dress already picked out for you to wear. She either couldn't detect your fragile state, or didn't seem to care as she continued speaking at a painfully loud volume. “My Lord sent me to wake you as he is finishing business in the study. He was up frightfully early, I could scarce believe it went the housemaids told me they’d already found him awake when they went to start the fires this morning. Gave young Samantha a right fright he did, scribbling away at his desk.” 
“Oh?” you croaked. 
You hadn’t even noticed the empty space in the bed bedside you until then. 
Clearly Anthony had risen early, if he’d even gone to sleep at all. Why were you not surprised? Your husband was perpetually in motion, always claiming there was something or someone that needed his urgent attention as the head of the Bridgerton clan. It was just one of the things that made you love him so much.
“Is he still there?”
“Yes, Ma’am,” the young girl continued, breezing about your room. “And that’s not the only strange incident this morning. It will tickle you rotten when I tell you the latest drama, but you see, Mrs Reynolds was ranting and raving about how she swore she had made three trays of fruit tarts last night, yet this morning, there were only two. The youngest kitchen maid, Betsy, is convinced it must be a ghost but my money is on Carter - the groom’s boy - he’s always snooping about the kitchen...” 
You winced. Ah. Maybe you hadn't been as stealthy last night as you’d hoped after all...
With as much enthusiasm as you could muster, you began to peel yourself from the mattress, trying to appear as if you were listening to your maid’s theories as she dressed you for the day. It then took all your resolve to make it downstairs and to the breakfast table without tripping over your own feet, or emptying the non-existent contents of your stomach. 
To your relief, only Eloise and Benedict had so far taken a seat at the breakfast table - and both looked about as miserable as you felt.  
“Good morning,” you mumbled, taking your usual chair next to the head of the table. You were quick to accept the steaming cup of coffee Benedict handed you, shooting him a thankful look. “Dare I ask how we feel?” 
“I think better than you and my dear sister here,” Benedict chirped, gesturing at a miserable looking Eloise. She had her head in her hands and was desperately trying to look at the plate of food in front of her with something other than repulsion. “Then again, I must admit I am somewhat more experienced in the art of late-night mischief than you both. I also did not have to deal with my brother before going to bed - thank you, again, for that noble sacrifice.”
“Your welcome,” you chuckled, a faint heat rising in your cheeks as you remembered the exact events after you and Anthony had gone to bed. “I just feel bad that you both got left to clean up the mess.” 
“Don’t be. I think we got it all.”
“You say that but I can’t remember anything after you started singing in French,” Eloise groaned, massaging her forehead once more. “I have the oddest feeling we may have forgotten something.”
You paused. You could only hope for your sake she was wrong. 
However, you were saved from such discussion by the arrival of the rest of the Bridgerton bunch. All conversation about your night-time escapades were quickly forgotten as Colin, Hyacinth and Gregory entered the room, bickering about something you couldn’t quite make out. They were swiftly followed by Violet and Francesca, who both looked unfairly cheerful for so early in the morning. 
You could only wish to look so fresh and composed before your first cup of whatever caffeinated beverage you could get your hands on. 
Then, finally, came your husband. Entering the room last, he turned and shot you a warm smile. Clearly, your shenanigans had been forgotten - for now - replaced instead by the memory of your other activities, much to the relief of you and your co-conspirators. 
In fact, you swore you saw Eloise exhale a breath of relief when Anthony didn't immediately launch into one of his lectures. Instead, he chose to join the rest of his family in helping himself to the awaiting breakfast spread, laid out on the sideboard for them, listening to some ongoing debate between his mother and youngest brother. 
“-but you said we could visit the park this afternoon.”
“I know, sweetheart, but I have to take Francesca and Eloise for their final fittings at the modiste. We shouldn’t be too long, and we can go after? Unless, perhaps your brothers will take you. Colin? Benedict? Anthony?”
Benedict looked physically pained at the idea of an afternoon at the park, what with his current delicate constitution and all. You honestly couldn't blame him. “Well, I uh - have a drawing class, this afternoon. Very last minute. Sorry.” 
“And I... um, have a meeting at the club?” Colin stammered hastily. “Anthony?” 
“Please, Anthony?” Gregory begged, all but pouting at his older brother as the pair made their way to the table. “I promise I’ll do all my lessons this week without complaining if you say yes. I’ll even let you have my pudding tonight.”
“As you asked so nicely, brother, I don’t see how an hour or so at the park could do any harm -” Anthony began, pulling out the chair next to you and lowering himself onto the seat in a moment that felt like it lasted forever as a horrifying sensation swept over you. 
You remembered what you’d forgotten. 
The chair.
“Anthony, wait-!”
The sudden crash was startling, as was the sight of your husband being sent flying backwards as the chair collapsed beneath him. 
No one moved. 
No one said a word. 
Benedict looked across at you and Eloise, the horror clear in his eyes as he choked the word you felt on the tip of your tongue: “Run!”
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Love me tender 🩷
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leviathanspain · 2 months
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not without him
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anthony bridgerton x reader
synopsis: you knew birth would be no easy feat, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to do it without him
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you clutched onto the white bedsheets, they were drenched with blood, and you were writhing on the bed as the doctor shouted orders at the nurses.
one had a cloth to your forehead, dabbing away your sweat and your tears. you couldn’t stop crying, it was an unbearable pain, that only got worse as the night went on.
violet had tried to prepare you, coming to her for advice on how to birth a bridgerton child. she had her most difficult birth with hyacinth, and just hearing her story sent chills down your spine.
anthony had been away in london when you went into labor. you knew he shouldn’t have left aubrey hall so close to the end of your pregnancy, but being the viscount meant there were things that required him present. you had hoped that your child would have some decency and arrive after the father, but the urge to push only became greater.
you feared that anthony wouldn’t make it, he was supposed to be here an hour ago, having rushed from london upon hearing the news.
the nurse looked down at you, “you have to push, my lady.” her voice quivered, as if she could feel your emotion. you teared up more, “no please- we have to wait for the viscount.” you felt weak, and you faintly heard the doctor shout that you were losing blood.
the nurse looked down again, and seemed firm, “you have to push, there is no time to spare if we wait for the viscount.” she dabbed your forehead again, “you and this baby will die if you don’t push now.”
you cried harder, “i need him here. i can’t do it without him.” you were scared, frightened by all these unfamiliar people. yes they were there to help you give birth to your first child, but you didn’t care, it wasn’t your husband dabbing your forehead or encouraging you.
your vision went fuzzy around the edges and your head fell back into the mounds of pillows that held you up. you could still hear the door push open, shouts being echoed into the room and finally, “let me through-“ his voice.
you heard a clatter of gear hit the wooden floor and you felt relief as he rushed to your side. anthony, still cold with the winter air, brushed the hair from your face, kissing your cheek. he saw how weak you looked, and could see the doctor’s expression.
“you can do it.” he whispered sweetly, “i’m here, you can do it.” he grabbed your hand, clutching it tightly and with his encouragement, you did the one thing you had been putting off.
the nurse over you seemed overjoyed that you were finally listening, there was fear among the doctor and staff that you would bleed out before anthony got there.
you grunted, weak from the blood loss. “push, my lady, push!” the nurse above you shouted, and you grunted loudly, doing as she said.
there was a brief moment of pause, relief that washed over you as you heard a newborn’s cry. you blinked away the sweat, feeling the damp cloth across your skin as you looked over at anthony, who hadn’t taken his eyes off of you. he was smiling brightly, but tears brimmed in his eyes, “you did it.” he whispered, “my lady….” he brushed the side of your face with a hand, and you closed your eyes, exhaustion washing over you.
you could see the light creeping through the curtains. it had been kept dark for you, candles burning just as you liked, even wearing your favorite nightgown. you could feel the pain, that ache that reminded you of what had happened.
you called out to your handmaid, watching as the door opened and instead, in stepped anthony holding the baby in his arms. your eyes softened, and you cooed, “my love.” you beckoned him to the bed, and anthony sat down carefully, the newborn in his arms was peacefully sleeping.
“good morning.” he kissed your forehead, “you have no idea how much i love you. i-“ he faltered, looking down at the baby to compose himself before he continued, “i almost lost you. please,” he looked at you, “please don’t ever scare me like that again. i beg you.” he whispered. he was happy at the birth of your son, but he wouldn’t have been if you had lost your life.
you looked at him, nodding. you didn’t want to say anything, instead looking down at the baby and resting your head on anthony’s shoulder, “have you thought of a name?” you noticed the baby’s fell head of hair and smirked, “looks like he got my hair.” you looked at the baby’s nose, “and your nose.” you laughed slightly, and anthony shrugged, “everyone says he looks like you more.”
his siblings must’ve arrived in from london. you smiled, but anthony knew what that smile was, “you must rest. the doctor said you lost a lot of blood, that you shouldn’t even think to lift a finger today.”
you sighed, “i won’t protest, i am feeling exhausted..” you didn’t know how to feel, your heart had never felt so much love all at once, “my boys.” you cooed, touching the baby’s hair as anthony kissed your forehead again.
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NOT FOR HIM — BENEDICT BRIDGERTON
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masterlist
pairing: benedict bridgerton x reader [plus platonic anthony x reader where he’s being a matchmaker/shitstirrer]
description: you may not have been the season’s diamond, but your debut had caused quite the stir in many a man’s heart — your childhood best friend benedict bridgerton included. however, given that the viscount had decided that he would marry this season, benedict cannot see why you would choose him over his brother.
warnings: kinda tiny bit of angst (if you squint) into tooth-rotting fluff !!! tiny bit of suggestive benedict at the very end but it’s not much !
author’s note: this is basically like a reverse to the anthony one i wrote because i have a big ol’ soft spot for benedict too after my latest rewatch. enjoy !!! [edited, but not thoroughly — will be returning to do so asap]
“You look astonishing, Y/N,” Benedict’s eyes were wide when he saw you, “Absolutely astonishing.”
You blushed crimson under the intensity of his gaze, “You don’t look too bad yourself this evening, Lord Bridgerton.”
You never called him that — you’d known him far too long to consistently comply with formalities — but considering that it was one of your very first balls of your very first season, you had to be the picture of manners.
“It is so strange to hear you call me Lord Bridgerton,” Benedict screwed his face up, “Even if it does give me some small hope that you might consider me too as one of your many suitors.”
You shook your head gently with a laugh, “Oh, Benedict, as if you would wish to court me.”
Before he had a chance to retaliate with stern disagreement at your idea that it was such a preposterous notion, your eyes snapped up to see his brother entering the ballroom.
“Ah,” you grinned, noticing that he had spotted you both immediately and was on his way over to you, “It appears your brother has finally arrived!”
You didn’t look at Benedict for long enough to see the frown on his face at your apparent excitement.
For years, everyone around you had speculated about the closeness of your relationship with Benedict.
Granted, you were close with the whole family, but the tenderness with which Benedict treated you had always teetered on blatant romance even if neither of you had seen it before.
Of course he was aware of it now — he’d realised he was in love with you long ago as silly young teenagers, and now that you were finally out in society (emphasis on finally, as you had delayed doing so as much as possible) he had hoped to make that clear.
But of course your eyes were fixed on his brother, the Viscount, who had finally decided he wished to marry and therefore seemingly snatched all of your attention away from him.
“Good evening, my lord,” you curtsied, and Anthony laughed, “Such formality! How are you enjoying your first ball, Y/N? I trust my brother has not let you leave his side?”
You giggled, and as much as Benedict adored the sound of your laughter he couldn’t help the clenching of his jaw at his brother’s remark and your evident amusement.
“He has taken great care of me, undoubtedly,” you smiled, hands resting on Benedict’s upper arm for a moment as you leaned into him, “How do you feel about your first ball on the hunt for a wife?”
Anthony scoffed, “Consumed with dread, as expected,” he joked, “Brother, would you mind if I stole Y/N away for one dance? Only so that I might enjoy one last moment of vague freedom before I endure the onslaught of mamas I see staring me down?”
Benedict swallowed thickly, because yes he very much did mind you being stolen away to dance with a man who could provide for you so much better than he could.
He had always been second best to his brother, but never with you.
And now he felt rather ridiculous as he nodded meekly and watched you saunter away at the side of his own brother, who would never love you like he did nor treat you as more than a friend and a commodity necessary to the life of an important man.
“Of course.”
You smiled shyly over at Benedict as you followed Anthony away, and made a mental note to confront him about the sad look gracing his features as you did so.
“My brother is staring daggers into my skull already,” Anthony chuckled as you took your positions to dance, “I rather wonder why he was not dancing with you if he is so bothered by my doing so.”
You bit your lip, “We have danced together twice already, Anthony. In fact, I’ve danced only with him so far tonight. I feel… safe with Benedict. This is all so terrifying.”
As Anthony beamed down at you knowingly, you realised quite what he had initially said, “Whatever do you mean by him staring daggers? Why would he be doing that?”
“Oh, my dear Y/N, you must see that my poor fool of a brother is overcome with jealousy at our interaction,” he laughed as though it was the most obvious thing in the world, “Particularly now that I plan to marry. He quite clearly thinks that it is you I wish to do so with.”
You looked down at your feet for a moment, suddenly feeling shy.
When you remembered that you were talking to a man you knew like he was part of your own family, however, your head snapped back up — a smirk gracing your face.
“Oh, am I not to become Viscountess? I so had my hopes up!” you feigned a gasp, “In all seriousness, Anthony, why on earth would Benedict think we might marry and more so why on earth would he care so much?”
Anthony heaved out a deep sigh at that as you danced, almost irritated by your blatant ignorance to what was so clear.
“I don’t believe I should tell you the answer to that if you are somehow quite unaware of it yourself,” he shook his head, briefly meeting the eyes of his brother as he spun you, and smiled almost teasingly at him, “I hope that after stealing you from him for this dance he might finally discuss it with you himself.”
You rolled your eyes, “You jest, Anthony, because if you are trying to imply that he has affections towards me I’m sure you are sorely mistaken.”
Anthony stopped abruptly, quirking his eyebrow at you, “You truly are oblivious?”
You looked at him curiously, doe eyed and inquisitive as you waited for him to continue — or to resume dancing so you didn’t continue to feel all eyes on your frozen frames.
“Right, very well. I am going to walk away now, all smiles,” he informed you, plastering a smile on his face and nodding at the onlookers as he kissed the back of your hand to show no ill-will had halted your dance, “I would suggest that you get some fresh air, perhaps? My brother might… Come to check on you.”
You forced a smile as he silently moved away from you and towards the buffet table at the other side of the hall.
With a sharp breath you took his advice, despite your confusion, and lifted your skirt a little to busy your hands as you traipsed out of the ballroom and onto the balcony.
Like clockwork, Benedict Bridgerton found himself at your side in mere moments.
“Are you waiting here for my brother?”
The tension in the air was palpable, his voice low as he failed to hide the disappointment at his suspicions.
“Not for him, no.”
“Then for another?”
“I suppose so.”
“Apologies, then. I’ll leave you to it.”
You spun on your heel now as he turned to leave, touching his shoulder, “No, Benedict, I was waiting— for you.”
“For me?”
The incredulous smile on his face made your heart swell with hope — perhaps Anthony was right.
Maybe what you had spent all these years perceiving as friendship truly was reciprocated love all this time.
“Anthony claimed he believed you jealous, and that you thought we were attached,” you giggled, and he swore his heart melted at the sound of your gentle laughter, “And I was utterly unsure as to why you would believe that, let alone be jealous of it. But then he told me to get some fresh air and that you might find me here and I became hopeful.”
“Hopeful?”
“Yes. Hopeful that perhaps the feelings that have steadily grown on my part throughout the time I have known you might be returned. That perhaps you were not joking when you said you hoped I might consider you a suitor this season,” you blushed crimson as you served him your honest feelings on a silver platter.
He cocked his head to the side curiously, not quite believing you entirely though you were evidently being sincere, “Do you not wish to marry my brother?”
You scoffed, quickly covering your mouth with your hand at the outburst, but then sighed as you looked deeply into his eyes, “Of course not, Benedict.”
“But he is a Viscount — he could offer you so much more than I, and he seemed taken with you.”
“He was taken with making you jealous enough to confront me, my dear Benedict. He spent our dance essentially telling me to wise up and talk to you,” you bit your lip nervously, “Because he knows that I have long loved you, and believes that you feel the same.”
The curious smile on his face grew now into a beaming grin, his hands flying to take yours within them and bring them to his lips for a gentle kiss.
“I—, Y/N, I cannot— I cannot even begin to express the joy that those words have brought me,” the words tumbled from his lips like he couldn’t think fast enough to convey his feelings, “I have been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I settled for cherishing mere friendship because I feared I would not be… I would not be the man for you beyond that.”
You shook your head, “Benedict, surely you know how dear you are to me? I— at the very least in my heart, you are the man for me. I’ve been certain of it for so long and that is why I feared entering society so much. I didn’t want to marry for the sake of marriage and have to have the man I truly love as a mere friend. You are more than enough for me, Benedict, I feel safe with you — you are home to me.”
“And you are home to me, Y/N,” he was trying so very hard not to kiss you, his words soft and delicate as his breath fanned over your face due to your newfound close proximity, “If you would allow me to… I would like to court you. In fact, I would propose to you now if I was to allow my selfishness to take control. But I want you to be sure it is me you want, even if it hurts to see you dance and converse with others.”
“You’re all I could ever want, Benedict,” you spoke like it was utterly obvious, “And when you do propose, you can be certain of my acceptance. For now I am happy to share every dance with you and pretend we need to get to know each other to form an engagement. We have all of the time in the world.”
“We do.”
You were both breathing heavily, eyes glossy with the sheer emotion of the confessions you had just shared.
“I wish so badly that I could kiss you right now, but I fear I may not be able to control myself in future once I do,” his voice was barely above a whisper as you licked your lips, swallowing thickly.
“I wish— I wish you might kiss me too,” your reply was hardly even coherent, too love drunk to properly formulate your words, “More than anything.”
He was still holding onto your hands, and so he brought them up to ghost another kiss over them again, settling for this as he fought his urge to press his lips to yours instead.
“As you said, my love, we have all the time in the world,” there was a subtle undertone of what you might describe as lust in his tone now, intertwined with the love struck lilt he had been speaking with.
Your breath hitched in your throat as his lips ghosted up your forearm briefly before he brought them back down to your hands.
“And I cannot wait.”
———
horny benedict at the end to satiate my own need for that despite the intention for this to just be fluffy hahaha. hope you enjoyed !!!
feel free to keep requesting — and in the mean time here is my masterlist.
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karyton · 5 months
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˚♡˚ The colour of love
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iiilllsam · 8 days
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baby agatha with her mama this time 🫶 (of course i have to make a penelope version who do you think i am?!)
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writtenfangirl · 19 days
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Madness
I wrote this so long ago and then abandoned it because I didn’t know if the ending was satisfactory or not. I thought it would have a greater plot as well but when I couldn’t find it, I was dissatisfied until I reread it and realized the prose was too good not to publish.
Fluff but also a little bit of angst if you squint hard enough.
In which Benedict Bridgerton finally reveals the truth.
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She was beautiful. Too beautiful, if Benedict was being perfectly honest with himself. Not the kind of beauty that had him picking up a paint brush and painstakingly striking an easel with lovely swirls of color but the kind of beauty that distracted him, made him brood in a dim corner of the room, watching the little twists of her mouth and the subtle way she arched a brow. Beauty to the point of distraction, like spending hours watching shooting stars dash across the night sky, not realizing as dawn approached on the horizon.
It was utterly maddening.
She was utterly maddening.
How was he meant to live, to exist and breathe, to witness such great beauty and yet have none of the capacity, the right, to keep it?
Just a glance from her, a single curve of her lips, and Benedict could feel his faith in God strengthening as easily as he could deny the Lord’s existence. Only a benevolent God could create such ecstatic beauty and yet no benevolent God could exist in this world if Benedict had to bear the cruelty of Y/N’s indifference.
Maddening.
He sighed, the sound bereft as he continued to watch her charm the eligible men of the ton. She had a veritable cabal of men gathered around her and if any other debutant had been in her position, they surely would have been overwhelmed by now.
But not Y/N.
Never Y/N.
With her head held high and her smile demure, she directed the men as easily as if she was holding court. A slight clearing of the throat and already, someone had a glass of lemonade in their hand while a flap of her hand would have the men falling over themselves in an attempt to get her a chair.
A queen holding court, indeed.
Benedict rolled his eyes at the man to her right, who practically shoved at the man on his left in order to catch Y/N’s attention. Not that it really mattered though, especially not when Y/N’s attention was focused on Benedict.
Even from across the room, the tension between them felt palpable. Exhilarating. It always had been with Y/N. Thick and smooth, the connection between them as tangible as their own beating hearts. Just a shared look between them and the world fell silent, the edges of his vision practically darkening at the edges until he saw only her.
Beautiful. Even as her face contorted with hurt for the briefest of seconds, her eyes pulling away from him and returning to the crowd of men that surrounded her.
Benedict gritted his teeth, the only sign of annoyance he let himself show.
“I see you are not quite so enamored with our diamond.”
Benedict’s head whipped to the left, finding Lady Danbury watching him with those shrewd eyes of hers. The old crone had her cane gripped tightly in her hands and Benedict fought his grimace at the phantom pain that shot up from his ankles. The dowager countess had a terrible habit of whacking gentlemen she didn’t like with that sturdy cane of hers and Benedict had felt the brunt of that pain far too many times for his liking.
Still, as a gentleman, he couldn’t very well ignore the woman. It would have been terribly rude of him to and it went against every fiber of the etiquette that had been drilled to him as a child.
He spared Y/N another glance before he spoke. “You think all those men enamored with her?”
“I think they think themselves enamored by her,” Lady Danbury said. “She is quite a beauty and accomplished too, I hear. Are you acquainted with the young lady?”
He had been, when he was young. As recently as a few months ago, Benedict had counted Y/N as one of his dearest friends but with everything that transpired between them…
“We are familiar with one another.”
Lady Danbury arched a brow, directing her attention back to Y/N. She was animatedly speaking with Anthony and Colin, the only time the entire evening where her smile didn’t seem a little bit forced. “Your brothers seem friendly with her. Why aren’t you?”
Because he was a stupid, bloody, idiot who didn’t know how to keep his damn mouth shut, that’s why.
But his pride would never let him say that, especially not in front of Lady Danbury. “We are familiar with each other.” He repeated, voice tight.
Lady Danbury’s eyes flickered. “I seem to recall your mother telling me about how you and the Lady Y/N were thick as thieves not so long ago.”
Bloody hell, the old crone was relentless. He didn’t want to talk about his and Y/N’s falling out, especially not with her.
He suddenly whirled, cocking his head to the side. “Oh, I believe I hear someone calling me.”
No one was calling him but not even his impeccable manners could make him stay.
Lady Danbury harrumphed. “I may be old, boy, but I am not deaf.”
“Definitely hear someone calling me.” Benedict even cupped a hand, placing it on the side of his mouth before he yelled a quick, “I’ll be right there!” He turned back to Lady Danbury, who was looking at him as if she knew his claims were a lie. “Lady Danbury, if you’ll excuse me.”
The dowager countess simply gave Benedict a knowing look yet let him go.
He ducked into the crowd towards… bloody hell he couldn’t find anyone he would rather talk to. His brothers were still off speaking with Y/N and he didn’t feel like speaking with his mother, who would likely hound him about his fight with Y/N. Which left the last person of their party, Eloise. A quick scan of the room revealed his sister in the other side of the room, conspiratorially whispering to her best friend, Penelope Featherington.
He zoomed towards them, turning his back on Y/N and Lady Danbury.
Eloise caught his eye as he approached and her lips pursed in displeasure. “Why do you look as if you’re expecting me to bail you out of a horrible situation.”
“Can’t I see my favorite sister with joy in my face without being suspected of ill intent?”Benedict said with a grin before bowing to Penelope, who returned the gesture with her own curtsy.
Penelope ducked her head to suppress a giggle.
Eloise rolled her eyes at him. “What do you want?”
“To ask you why you’re sulking in a corner instead of dancing despite—“ he pulled at the dance card in her wrist, every single line filled with names that were unfamiliar to him. “Did you put fake names in your dance card?”
Eloise snatched her wrist back. “Yes. I thought that with Y/N grabbing the attention of so many of the gentlemen, I would be spared the embarrassment of having to entertain any gentlemen tonight. Unfortunately, I was wrong.”
Benedict turned to Penelope. “How many approached her?”
“Six,” Penelope smirked, “and those six quickly turned right back around.”
“Well with a full dance card, I’m not at all surprised.”
Eloise rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Spare me the lecture, brother. I’m sure I’ll hear enough from mother tonight.”
“She caught you?”
“After Eloise turned down the sixth one, Lady Violet began to suspect,” Penelope explained.
Benedict grinned. “When have you known me to lecture you?”
She gave him a saccharine smile, the kind that Benedict always knew would end with her barbed words. “Aren’t you meant to be fawning over Y/N? You’d done it most of our life.”
He bristled at her words.
Penelope shot them a curious look. “You never told me you were acquainted with the lady?”
“Hadn’t I?” Eloise frowned. “Lady Y/L/N’s family and ours have been acquainted for ages. Of course, she rarely ever came to London and if it hadn’t been for her father’s recent passing she wouldn’t have had a season at all. Mama had held hope that perhaps one of my dear brothers would begin to take some responsibility and marry her.” She lowered her voice in a conspiratorial whisper that was so loud, it still reached Benedict’s ears. “Personally, I always thought Benedict would offer. He and Y/N had a special bond growing up. Even Daphne thinks so.”
Benedict had never hit a woman before but perhaps, just this once, excuses could be made for one’s sisters.
“So, well acquainted then,” Penelope said with a slight smile.
“I do recall Benedict pining after Y/N for years,” Eloise mused, uncaring as Benedict’s mood soured. “You never did tell me why it is you suddenly became estranged”
“Not that it’s any of your business.” He grumbled.
Eloise batted eyes innocently. “Irritable today, aren’t you, brother? Could it possibly be because of the cadre of men that hound every one of Y/N’s footsteps?”
“I have changed my mind. Francesca is now my favorite sister.”
“I love you too, Benedict,” she all but grinned.
He turned his attention back to Y/N, who, to his surprise, had taken her leave.
“She’s in the garden, if you wish to speak to her,” Eloise said, noting his wandering eyes and nodding towards the open veranda at the side.
“What gave you the impression that I would like to speak to her?”
Eloise simply rolled her eyes before tugging Penelope’s arm. “With Y/N taking her respite, I imagine there will be a sudden influx of gentlemen who would like to dance. Let us make ourselves scarce.” And she pulled Penelope along, the red head offering Benedict an apologetic look.
He glanced at the crowd once again before letting his feet carry him through the veranda and out towards the garden. There were still many people milling about outside that granted them protection from scandal but it was much more intimate than the loud din of the ballroom.
The night was cool, the spring air serene compared to the humidity of the ballroom.
He spied Y/N, her back turned against the door. Upon hearing his approach, she sighed. “Good sir, if you did not understand me, I wish to be al—“ she turned and her words died at her lips at the sight of him. “Oh. It’s you.”
She looked even lovelier up close. She always did. Whether dressed in a simple frock with her long hair flowing down her back or dressed ornately with jewels adorning her, she always looked lovelier up close.
“What do you want, Benedict,” Y/N said, dropping that societal mask she employed inside.
“To apologize.”
She shook her head. “There is nothing to apologize for. You asked for my hand under false pretenses, I rejected you. End of story.“
“Under false pretenses?” He echoed, his own tone turning sharp. “You think my proposal to be insincere? Is that why you rejected me?”
“I did not think it insincere, I knew it to be insincere. I heard you and the Lady Violet discussing me. I heard when you declared your intention to ask for my hand in marriage simply because she had asked you to.”
Oh.
Oh.
He remembered then, the conversation he had with his mother right before he proposed.
“Propose to her,” Violet had urged just as breakfast had been served, with only Benedict and Violet dining.
“I am not even courting her, mama,” he replied exasperatedly. It had been far too early in the morning to entertain his mother’s insistence on seeing him wed to Y/N. She’d pestered him about it in one form or another even before the Y/L/Ns had come to visit the Bridgertons and Benedict knew she would not stop until he and Y/N were formally engaged.
But Y/N had just ended her mourning period for her father. And though societal mandates dictated that it was perfectly reasonable for Benedict to ask for her hand in marriage, he knew how deeply she mourned the man, especially since his death had placed her in such a precarious position. The late patriarch of the Y/L/N family had been fond of his only child, even if she had been born a girl. And Y/N had loved him, even if his death left her and her mother saddled with financial debt despite coming from the longest line of barony in England.
“What does it matter that you are not courting?” Violet demanded. “You have known her since you were both children. You’ve been courting her all your life.”
“Mama, please leave it well enough alone.”
“What is it that you do not like about her?” She insisted. “She is beautiful and accomplished and you have known each other your whole lives. Any young man would be fortunate to be bound to her in marriage.”
“I never said anything that would imply otherwise.”
“Then why do you refuse to ask her for her hand in marriage? Doing so would spare her a season in London and limit their financial troubles.” And then she had gasped in indignation. “Or is their financial troubles the very reason why you refuse? I never raised you to be avaricious!”
Bloody hell. “I am not avaricious, mother. I do not care about her dowry or lack thereof!”
“Then what is it? Do not tell me it is because you do not love her. I have seen the way you look at her.”
Benedict had eyed his fork, had wondered if perhaps, it would be a better to shove it in his ears than listen to his mother’s hullabaloo.
Instead he took a scone, spreading a generous layer of clotted cream and jam so his hands had something to do rather than maim himself.
“And how is it I look at her, mother?” He drawled.
“The same way your father used to look at me.”
At that he had paused, scone half-raised to his mouth. He hadn’t known what to say anymore. Mentions of his own father had always been capable of silencing his mind.
Finally, he had decided on telling her the truth, that his mother may finally stop pestering him.
“Asking Y/N for her hand in marriage had always been the plan, mother,” Benedict relented. “I was simply waiting for the perfect moment.”
Violet smiled at her son kindly. “There are no such thing as perfect moments, dearest. Only moments that can be made perfect. And whether you ask her later or tomorrow or next week, that moment will be perfect by virtue of you asking.”
She was right, of course. Violet Bridgerton was so rarely incorrect especially in matters of the heart and love.
Benedict had given her a smile, and said, voice dripping in sarcasm. “Well, since you so graciously asked me to, I shall propose to the Lady Y/N, if only to make you happy.”
That must have been what Y/N heard. Not the whole story but the end, when Benedict had teased his mother.
Now he was convinced that God existed and that he must be cruel. Only the machinations of a cruel God could have lined up the timing perfectly.
Y/N’s eyes flickered as she regarded him. “I do not wish to bind you in marriage with someone you do not hold any affection for. You have fulfilled your promise to your mother and have asked for my hand. I rejected you. We no longer have any obligations with one another. Good night.” She made a move to pass him, to walk back to the ballroom to her gaggle of men but Benedict’s hand shot up, gripping her arm and keeping her to him.
His hands were gloved and even Y/N’s arms were sheathed in silk. And though he had never felt gloves to be particularly offensive, he wished to burn the ones that covered their hands. If only so he could feel her smooth skin beneath his fingers.
The heady scent of her perfume wafted through his senses. She smelled divine, like walking through a garden of roses under the cover of moonlight as the stars twinkled above his head. Utterly mouthwatering, and capable of driving even the sanest of men into insanity. The scent of distraction.
Always so distracting.
Benedict forced his mouth to speak before his brain could forget the words he needed to say. “Do you think so little of me? Capable of such cruelty especially when it comes to you.”
Y/N’s brows met, a flash of pain in her eyes and then it was gone. “It is the opposite, really. I think the world of you, Benedict. Only a gentleman would offer to marry a girl he has no obligations to simply because of her precarious position in life. You are an honorable man and any woman would be lucky to call you their husband. It is why I cannot accept your proposal, not when you do not love me. Not when there is no one on this world more deserving of love than you.”
Benedict frowned at her. “Why do you continue to insist that I do not love you?”
“Because you do not!” She pulled away from him, wrenching her hand from his grasp. Her eyes were pure anguish as she looked at him and the very sight of her pain had him staggering back. “If you truly held any affection for me, I would know. I have studied you all our lives, Benedict. And in all the time we shared together, you had never shown any affection for me beyond that of a friend. Your proposal hurt, Benedict. I have loved you in every way a man could be loved for so long and for you to ask for my hand in marriage out of pity—“ She choked, eyes widening as if she didn’t mean to say the things she’d said.
“You love me?” He echoed, heart beating quickly in his chest. He wondered, briefly, if his fast beating heart marks the day he really lived. If Y/N’s confession had been the reason he truly felt alive for the first time in his life.
Her face crumpled in pain as she stepped back. “Forgive me, I shouldn’t have said those things. Please take your leave, Benedict. That I may salvage whatever scraps of my dignity is left.”
But Benedict did no such thing.
Instead he took her hands and lowered himself into a kneel, setting his eyes upon her. The arching light of the manor spilled over the veranda casted her in a soft glow that took his very breath away.
Y/N’s eyes widened in alarm and whatever pain she held there was washed away by her surprise. “Benedict, what are you doing?”
“Begging you for forgiveness.”
“What? Benedict, get up.”
But he held firm, his determination cementing his knees to the ground. “Forgive me, Y/N, for my grave transgressions against you. That you had ever lived your life doubting my affections for you, or wondering if I cared for you as more than a friend are sins I will carry with me to my last breath. It will be my great shame that I had not made it abundantly clear that I love you. Because I do love you. Most ardently.”
“Benedict, get up. This is madness—“
“You are right. It is madness. The way I feel for you would drive the sanest of people into lunacy. But if loving you is madness then I don’t ever wish to be sane.”
Her eyes gleamed silver with unshed tears that threatened to fall from her pretty eyes. “B-But that morning, the day you proposed—“
“I did not propose to you out of pity for you, I did it out of pity for me. I needed to put myself out of my misery and finally marry the only girl I ever had the privilege of falling in love with rather than continue pining after you in secret.”
She let out a a laugh through her tears, the sound like bells chiming during a storm. Light and beautiful despite the pouring rain that threatened to drown it out. “Ask me again.”
His heart leapt to his throat, pounding so quickly he struggled to get the words out. But they came nonetheless, the words clear and betraying none of his anxiety. “Y/N, will you marry me?”
“Yes.”
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lydiimae · 23 days
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Gentle
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Pairing: Anthony Bridgerton x fem!reader
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, panic attack, fluff hehe, Anthony being the sweet husband ik he is
A.N: Hello my loves and hello dearest anon ^-^/! This one is a bit on the shorter side (2.5k words) but I had a lot of fun writing this and I hope I gave you what you wanted Nonnie. I imagine Anthony (I'M SO EXCITED TO SEE SEASON 3 MARRIED ANT AND KATE) as a protective and loving husband, who is also extremely gentle when he wants to be. Also, Infatuation pt two is in the works, for those that are eager (thank you btw <3 T-T) it should be out by next week at the latest. P.S I am planning on uploading at least twice a week hehe! Enjoy my dears! <3
Req found here <3
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Marrying a Viscount was always going to be stressful, it came with responsibility. As well as a certain necessity to be perfect, at least that is the thought that nagged you. It was only a matter of time before the stress of being Anthony Bridgerton's wife caught up to you.
You had honeymooned in Edinburgh and Bath, all of the usual quiet places. He wished to make it just that, quiet and peaceful as both of you knew that would be one of the only times you would live in that blissful silence. Without worry of gossip, or rumors, or responsibilities.
Anthony also knew that you had a tendency to be anxious. Whether it be a result of how many people were present at a ball, or the rumors that tended to linger in your mind even after they slowly washed away from others. He wanted to show you the sights, and the gorgeous nature that was present in both of the cities that he had selected.
He also wished to show you the city of Bath. Take you to one of the large Roman baths, parade you around town, and wander the hills for hours on end. All lovely things that had taken your mind away from the lingering anxieties of being the new Viscountess.
It had worked marvelously, you had been the happiest he had seen you ever since you had met. You were completely in your element, especially when you were outside. It was a very loving, and freeing six months away.
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Your leg jiggles as you fiddle with your gloves, looking out the window of the carriage as it rolls down the road to Aubery Hall. As soon as you had gotten back to England, your anxieties flooded back into your mind. You were already dreading what was going to happen. You and Anthony were already planning to attend a ball tomorrow, the first one of your marriage.
You hated it, you knew that people would talk, the women would glare and whisper, perhaps even confront you. You did not want to deal with it. You wished to be back in Bath, having a picnic with your husband, far away from the gossip.
You feel a hand on your knee and turn. "You have been antsy for four whole hours, my love. What is it?" He asks, moving his hand to yours and giving it a squeeze. You chew on your bottom lip and settle for resting your head on his shoulder. "I am only nervous for the ball tomorrow." You whisper.
"The ball, or the people?" He returns, pressing a kiss to the top of your head before tilting your chin up so he can look at you. You frown slightly and he gives a comforting grin. "They will talk, you know that, but none of it will matter. It is just that, talk." He murmurs before pressing a quick kiss to your lips.
"But what if... you leave and then I am alone and one of them tries to-" You begin, but he cuts you off swiftly with another kiss. A longer one, but still as sweet as before. You sigh and rest your forehead against his. "You are so much more capable than you know, Y/N. You are the perfect Viscountess and the perfect Bridgerton. None of them shall ever be able to take either of those two things away from you." He whispers.
You smile as your cheeks heat up from his speech. "You are mine, mine to protect and mine to love. I take that duty very seriously." He finishes, cupping your cheek. You lean into his touch and smile. "I love you." You whisper back and he grins. "And I love you." He returns.
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Tomorrow comes all too quick, and soon you are in the large closet in your master bedroom, your maids pulling on the strings of your corset to get it to your liking. Anthony, however, waits downstairs in his study already dressed up fully for the occasion.
You had promised to try and be quick, and he knows you tried to keep that promise. He also knew that you wanted to look perfect, so he did not mind being a bit late to the ball. He wished for you to be as comfortable as you could be. After about thirty minutes of waiting, he had sent his family ahead, promising to meet them there.
He would be lying if tonight was a relaxed night for him. He was a ball of nerves, but he knew how to hide them well. He was not nervous for him, no, he was nervous for you.
He knew that you were perfect, and all of the much older and married members of the ton did as well. It was the cruel debutantes he worried about. He knew that many of them would be bitter, even if they were not interested in him. It was many women's third or fourth social season, many women would take that out on any kind soul they could find, and you were the kindest.
He downs his glass of scotch and adjusts his cravat before standing up and going to the bottom of the staircase. He wanted to see you now, and he would not wait another second. Just as he is about to call out, you appear at the top of the steps, dressed in the infamous Bridgerton blues.
The gown is a gorgeous navy blue, and you have paired it with long, white, silk gloves. Your hair is pulled back in his favorite way, an elegant pin holding it up in an elaborate bun. To tie it all together, you are wearing the diamond necklace and earrings he bought you in Edinburgh. So simple, yet so incredibly beautiful. So you.
You smile at him as you walk down the stairs and he just about dies right there. "My God, you look ethereal." He whispers as he offers you his arm. You gladly take it and he grins, pressing a kiss to your forehead before leading you to the carriage.
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The driver opens the door of the carriage once the two of you arrive at Lady Danbury's grand estate. You look out at the many other women and men filing out of their carriages and feel a familiar sense of dread, causing you to gnaw on the skin on the inside of your cheek.
"Darling?" He asks after a moment and you look up, your cheeks flushing in embarrassment once you realize he has probably been holding his hand out for you for some time. "Sorry." You mumble, before taking his hand and allowing him to pull you to your feet and help you out of the carriage.
The two of you walk hand in hand into the ballroom, which is bustling with activity. However, when the Viscount and his new bride enter, all of the chattering halts. The eery silence makes you wrap your arms around one of his, the sense of dread looming over your head only getting more intense.
He notices and moves down, kissing you softly on the lips. Part of it is for show, of course, but part of it is also because he knows that it will calm your nerves down to a point where you can manage them. He just knows, always.
He pulls away. "Come on, we are going to make this boring night a good one, hm?" He murmurs. You smile gently and nod, walking deeper into the ball. You hear the whispers, the cruel words from the other women, but choose to ignore them for now.
The two of you arrive at the space on the floor where his family stands. He lets go of your arm with a kiss on your cheek and enters a conversation with Colin. You walk to Eloise, of course, and begin to speak to her about your newest literary obsession.
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Anthony eventually finds himself surrounded by his friends, leaving you and Eloise to your own devices. "It is quite an interesting story, I am surprised I only found just found it." You hum as she grins. She had recommended the book Frankenstein after you had said you wished to read more of the classics. "I am surprised as well, you always struck me as a horror type of woman." She teases, bumping your shoulder. You laugh lightly as she does.
"Well, now I know that I am only to come to you for book recommendations as my husband is quite lacking in that department." You return, your eyes filled with playful affection. "Well, I could have told you that, Y/N. My brother, it seems, only likes books in the historical genre." She sighs and looks at her glass of lemonade. "I shall be right back, I am going to get more lemonade." She says and is off before you can protest.
You frown and look around for someone else to talk to, to hide behind really, as you wait. Before you can you are approached by none other than Cressida Cowper, an absolute addict to gossip. "Y/N L/N, I am surprised to see you alone. Has he grown bored of you already?" She says, tilting her head.
You wince and sigh. You knew it was coming, Cressida always had a knack for finding you when you were alone and vulnerable. Often times her insults insist on picking on your nervous demeanor, or even your kindness. The use of your maiden name, however, stung uniquely. A sign that she thought your marriage insignificant, and who knows how many others did. You can feel your breathing pick up already.
"Cressida. It is lovely to see you." You say softly, turning to face her head on. She rolls her eyes at your blatant disregard for her question. "Indeed. It is always a pleasure seeing how... dull you look. I am surprised the Viscount has not already taken a mistress, I mean, he would do well to." She sneers. "I-" You begin but she cuts you off.
"You know I am right. You are dull, Y/N. You always have been. It was a miracle you got as much attention as you did when you debuted and an even bigger miracle that you got married to Anthony. He will grow bored of you, just as everyone has." She scoffs before sauntering off to her next target.
You feel the heat of tears in your eyes and the familiar feeling of tightening in your chest. You know Cressida can be cruel, but what if she got those words from another? What if she was right? Perhaps Anthony will grow bored, perhaps he already has. The thoughts have you going into a spiral, your breathing picking up until you realize you cannot breathe anymore.
Eloise, upon noticing that Cressida had made her way over to you, rushes back. "Oh God, that woman is nothing but a jealous old spinster, Y/N." She whispers, putting her glass down and reaching out before she realizes that you are already too far gone. She takes your hand and begins to walk in search of her brother, "Hold on, Y/N. He has to be near. It will be alright." She says softly, though it does nothing to stop the state of panic you are already in.
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She finds him about two minutes later, and you are already in tears. She drags you to him and spins him around. "Cressida." She whispers before leaving the two of you together. He immediately wraps his arms around you and leads you out of the ballroom to one of the balconies, whispering sweet nothings into your ear the entire way.
"Alright. Look at me, my love." He murmurs once you are outside, grabbing your hands in his and pressing them to his chest so you can feel his heartbeat. "Ready?" He whispers when your tear-filled eyes meet his and you nod.
"Alright, in..." He breathes in and you do the same, your breathing stuttering as you try your best to follow. "And out..." He whispers, exhaling with you. The two of you have gone through this many times. He had helped you when you were courting, when you were engaged, and he will help you until the end of time.
After a few moments of him guiding you, your breathing calms and you wrap your arms around his neck, pressing your face into the fabric of his cravat. "What did she say, darling?" He murmurs, rubbing your back gently.
You hesitate, and he senses your apprehension. "I will not get angry with you over words that such an insignificant woman spoke, I will not cause a scene. I promise. I only wish to know before I take you back home, hm?" He whispers, gently cupping your cheeks so he can look at you.
You wait for a moment before taking a deep breath and nodding. "She said that you would grow tired of me, just like everyone else. That you would take a mistress. She said I was dull." You whisper back, your grip on his shirt tightening.
His face darkens for a moment before he pulls you back into his embrace. "She knows nothing, my love. If you were dull, I would not want to spend every waking moment of my life with you. I would not have married you if you were not perfect for me in every single way." He whispers, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.
"But I... I do this so often. I get so... so anxious. I am hardly a Viscounte-" You start but he cuts you off. "You are the perfect Viscountess. Y/N," He begins, pulling back a bit so he can look at you. "I do not say that lightly. I know that it has only been a short six months since we were wed, but I am more secure in my belief that you will be the perfect Viscountess. The perfect mother, the perfect head of my house. You are the perfect woman for me and for my family. Do not doubt that ever. Especially over some silly statement a foolish, sad woman made." He says, caressing your cheeks.
Your eyes burn at his speech, and your heart flutters. You lean in and press a lingering kiss to his lips before pulling away. "I love you so very much, Anthony." You whisper.
He grins, and you swear you see the faintest of pinks spread over his cheeks. "And I love you, Viscountess Bridgerton." He whispers, pressing another kiss to your lips. "Let us go home. Lady Danbury will not miss our company I'm sure." He hums as he parts, making you nod in response.
That is just what the two of you do. After saying goodbye to his family, and to Lady Danbury, the two of you make your way to the carriage.
The rest of the night is spent in bed, speaking of the future, whispering love confessions in each other's ears, and loads of kisses. Who knew that a man who seems so brutish could be so gentle just for you?
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nothankyoudear · 9 months
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Okay, so we all saw how Crowley's Bentley LOVES Aziraphale in season 2, but what about Aziraphale's things loving Crowley?
When Crowley argues about how the Bentley is his, Aziraphale uses his bookshop as an example of how they basically share things anyway... SO I implore you to imagine: - Cups of espresso just miraculously appearing on the nearest surface to Crowley, and the cup's content changing every time depending on Crowley's mood (one time Crowley took a sip of what he thought was water and got absolutely CHOKED by straight vodka)
- Velvet Underground immediately starts playing for Crowley the moment he steps foot into the bookshop
- The lights in the bookshop get amped up to 1000 so Crowley can see properly with his sunglasses on indoors
But it doesn't stop there - what if the bookshop loves Crowley so much it ACTIVELY tries getting him and Aziraphale together so he'll stay forever???
Crowley got kicked out of his flat after Shax replaced him, right?? So what if now the bookshop is just doing things to try and make Crowley move in???
May I suggest:
- Aziraphale's bed becomes a double bed - A pair of red slippers starts appearing by the said double bed, right next to Aziraphale's white pair
- An absolutely GIANT snake enclosure just randomly appears one day at the back of the bookshop. I'm talking the fucking Beverly Hills mansions of snake enclosures - ANOTHER TOOTHBRUSH. AT THE SINK. - Some of the most beautiful, LUSTROUS plants starts growing in the crooks and crannies of the bookshop just so Crowley has a reason to come over and inspect them
PLS TELL ME YOU SEE THE VISION
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chaoticace2005 · 2 months
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I stopped the clip of Angel and Nuggets reuniting and excuse me but what the FUCK
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LOOK AT THIS GUY! LOOK AT HIM!!!!!
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LET HIM BE HAPPY!!!!!
ALSO FAT NUGGETS’ FACE?! THE AMOUNT OF LOVE HE HAS FOR ANTHONY?! IF THAT PIG GETS HURT—
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VALENTINO WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! I AM GOING TO K I L L YOU
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the-fucking-cannibal · 2 months
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Ohhh, Bildad has a crush alright 😏😚💓
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leviathanspain · 1 year
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Can you write a Benedict Bridgerton fluff oneshot where Colin is best friends with the reader’s twin brother (and she with Daphne and Eloise) and Colin let’s it slip that he’s accidentally seen the reader in her nightgown amongst his and Anthony’s teasing of Benedict’s long-standing feelings for her and the reader happens to overhear?
little things
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benedict bridgerton x reader
synopsis: the brothers teasing has finally made its mark, and benedict can’t hold himself back anymore
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colin, anthony and benedict greeted you and your twin brother as you arrived to the bridgerton household. the bridgerton sisters followed, daphne and eloise smiling brightly at you as you returned their smile.
your twin brother, ernest, was swept up by the bridgerton boys. you turned back to raise an eyebrow at him, “be back soon! and nothing out of the sorts, i mean it, bridgertons!” you tried to use your best, stern voice as your brother was shoved out the door, most likely going to the local gentlemen’s club.
your brother was usually sent home in a carriage, practically spilling out the door with how drunk he was. it was funny the first few times, but now it was anything but.
daphne and eloise took you by the arms, leading you to their library for some discussion on the latest novel you have all been reading. “don’t worry about ernest, he’s a good boy, and colin will take him home as always.” daphne tried to comfort you, but thinking about it, it didn’t make it any better.
a few drinks in, and ernest excused himself. the three brothers watched him walk steadily out to find the bathroom before turning to each other.
“he’s a delight.” anthony remarked with a smile before downing his drink.
colin laughed, “i’ll say. his sister is turning out to be an even better one!” he swung his rum around in his glass, taking a sip while he turned a coy eye to anthony.
anthony picked up what colin was putting down and nodded firmly, “yes. a good set of childbearing hips, and she has a good set of lungs on her.” he raised his eyebrows at benedict, who knew exactly what his brothers were doing.
“i’ll have you two know, that lady y/n is a very intelligent woman. a good set of brains on her.” he nodded, happy with his answer as he swung a drink down.
“a good set of something for sure.” colin pursed his lips, “the modiste didn’t use too much fabric on her nightgown. i could practically see everything.” he nudged anthony who nearly spat out his drink.
benedict stopped moving completely, “what?”
colin shrugged, “her hips, every curve, every nook, every cranny. she’s gorgeous, brother. i understand why you fancy her so.” anthony quieted the conversation just as ernest walked back into the room, “listen boys, let’s call it a night shall we?”
you rushed down the steps of the bridgerton house as you heard the carriage pull up. you bid your farewell to the sisters as you walked out into the fresh london air.
the door to the carriage opened and out fell the three bridgerton brothers. anthony greeted you first, bidding you a quick goodbye as he strolled inside. colin did the same, avoiding your eyes, strangely, he booked it inside.
benedict took slow steps as you approached the carriage, his hands in his pocket as you stopped before him.
“my, my, sir bridgerton. i see that the night has served us both well.” you smiled, and benedict returned the smile, “only has it gotten better that you illuminate it once more with your smile.” he complimented you, “have a good night, lady y/n.” he grabbed your hand, gently placing a kiss on it before strolling inside.
as you hopped into the carriage, you saw your brother, slightly less drunk than previous times, still smiling widely though as he greeted you.
“sister- didn’t you have a coat on when we arrived?” he blinked once before throwing his head back, closing his eyes with a groan.
you looked down and realized he was right. you were wearing a long sleeved dress, and didn’t even realize you had forgotten your cost. good thing the carriage hadn’t pulled off yet!
you stepped down, and ran back up the steps to the bridgerton house. a maid let you in, and you ran back to the library to get your coat.
you found it sitting in the chair that you had been in, and you shucked it on.
you tiptoed out of the library and past anthony’s study, which had the door cracked open. as you approached, you heard loud voices echoing off the walls. it was the brothers, and whatever it was about, was clearly heating them up.
“-you can’t just say things like that, colin! you know how he feels about her!” one voice said, and you deciphered it to be anthony.
colin, you assumed, cleared his throat, matching the volume level, “i am drunk! and it’s about time he admits he loves her, im tired of trying to make him jealous enough to do it! i might as well marry her if that’s what it’ll take!” it was clearly about a girl, and it seemed like it was about benedict too.
benedict, the last one to say anything was sighing deeply, “you are so lucky i didn’t punch you out right there. how could you admit to seeing her in her nightgown?! she was indecent, and yet you joke about it like it’s something funny? y/n is a lady, her twin brother is our best friend!” benedict shouted back at colin, and you realized with a pang, that it was you they were talking about.
“fine, im sorry benedict. but you need to admit things to yourself. this isn’t just some childhood crush, she’s debuting next season, make sure y/n becomes your wife.” colin exited the room first, and as the door opened, your shocked face on the other side of it, it was like his face was lit on fire.
“y/n- lady y/n! i thought you left?” colin pushed the door open and his brothers stood up to meet him at the door.
you looked at him and raised an eyebrow, “i left my coat behind.” you looked at the three brothers and nodded firmly, “very well. i shall depart now.” you gave colin a glare before you started to walk away.
as you walked, you heard them whispering amongst themselves, and as you reached the door, a slap echoed into the hall and you stopped for a moment until you continued on.
as you walked down the steps to the carriage, a shout had you turning around.
“y/n!” all formalities had been thrown out as benedict stepped down to meet you, he panted slightly and caught his breath, “my brothers-“ he laughed, “are horrible.” he finished, “i apologize for what you heard, if you did hear anything but,” he reached down and grabbed your hands in his, taking you by surprise, “i suppose i needed this.” he chuckled slightly, “in order to do this.”
leaning forward, his lips met yours in a kiss, taking you in his arms, you kissed him back roughly. suddenly, it dawned on you where you were, and you inhaled sharply, pulling back.
“mr. bridgerton.” you couldn’t help but smile as you fiddled with the buttons of his shirt. his hand lifted your chin slightly and you stared for the first time in those big bright eyes, “i suppose you’ll see me tomorrow morning.” he let you go now, and you smiled, “i suppose so.”
he turned and watched you walk to your carriage, your brothers drunk slurs floating up to benedict’s ears as he carried himself back inside, his brothers already cheering from the doorway.
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whispersoftheton · 11 months
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This idea has been on my mind for a while… Anthony seeing you in the bridgerton blues for the first time, can either be smut or fluff :) thanks
Ahhhh I love this so much, thank you for sending it in! :)
Anthony Bridgerton x Fem!Reader
Warnings: kissing, fluff, smut, p in v
Word Count: 1.2K
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The family gathered around the room on another sweltering summer day. Hyacinth and Gregory bickered over yet another sworn tie in their endless chess matches while Eloise quietly read her book in the opposite corner. Anthony sat between his brothers, Benedict telling him of his endless tales from class among the unspoken soirees he discreetly attended from time to time and Colin of his many travels. Anthony found himself growing bored, awaiting your arrival. You were to accompany him and the rest of the Bridgertons to the races this afternoon, as it would be your first outing as a family since your marriage to the Viscount. And he could not bear to listen to another one of Benedict's tales for one more second; he needed to see you.
"Mother." Anthony stood hurriedly from the gold-trimmed sofa to approach Lady Bridgerton as she entered the room. "Where is she?"
"Now, calm down, Anthony; she is nearly ready." Lady Birdgerton assured him while straightening out his neckline to perfection. She knew Anthony's antics well enough by now to understand his growing impatience was only a product of his theatrics.
"I feel as though I have been waiting an eternity. Surely she must-" Anthony made his way past his mother and into the hallway, his words stammered as soon as his eyes landed on you. You'd been making your way to the main room when he appeared in your path, a smile gracing both your lips. There was no word in the English language to describe how beautiful you looked. The most impeccable dress draped over every curve in a more delicate shade of blue than he wore but complimented his outerwear perfectly. Warmth blossomed in Anthony’s chest at the sight of you in that color. His color. He never thought he'd see the day when the one he loved, the one his heart eternally yearned for, would wear the color that meant so much to him and his family. He would never tire of how easily you overpowered him whenever he was in your presence.
"Do I look alright?" You nervously patted your skirt, ensuring everything was as it should be. Hesitation apparent in your tone as you approached him.
"Alright?" Anthony's eyes widened as he took your hands in his. He couldn't believe you would use a modest word such as 'alright' to describe how exquisite you looked right now. "My love, you look…absolutely stunning. Beyond words, truly." Heat filled your face, and your stomach fluttered at his flattery. Anthony had a way of making you feel as though you two were the only person on the face of the earth, easily melting under his gaze. It was an exquisite feeling you wished to relish in forever. Anthony glanced around and took advantage of the privacy to steal a kiss. His lips were warm and soft against your own. They parted slightly, allowing you to move more passionately as your hunger for one another became apparent in mere seconds. It shouldn't be surprising, seeing as you and your husband could hardly keep your hands off each other since your wedding night. The moment grew heated with every swipe of his tongue, hands caressing the soft flesh of your waist and hips hidden beneath the restricting fabric of your dress.
"Mother!" Anthony reluctantly pulled away, panting, and shouted. "Go ahead without us. We will join you shortly, as promised." Without so much as a second thought or a response from anyone, he whisked you away toward a nearby closet in a closed-off hallway he was sure no one wandered by.
"Anthony, what are you doing? The races are starting soon." You protested before he cut you off with another chaste kiss and shut the door behind him.
"We will join them in a moment. I must have you right now." The passion flowed through his words, making you squeeze your thighs together in anticipation and a chuckle escape you. He pulled you close, continuing his ministrations. His lips scattered kisses along your neckline and down to your chest as your hands tangled in his hair. His hands worked tirelessly to remove as many barriers between your bodies as quickly as possible as he gently guided you to lean on the wall behind you. Your dress was bunched up toward you as Anthony hastily removed his trousers just to his upper thigh. You panted under him, his lips never leaving your skin, leaving a trail of marks and bruises as a reminder of his love for you.
"Seeing you in our family color," Anthony spoke between kisses. "You are so beautiful." He was rambling as he often did when he was this worked up. The way you looked, how your body responded to his every touch. Every beautiful sound he was able to pull from you, it drove him mad. He couldn't take it anymore; he had to have you now. Anthony abruptly lifted and pressed you against the wall, your fingers tugging at his hair and desperately nipping at his lower lip, pulling an animalistic groan from his chest.
"Anthony, please." You practically whimpered when you felt his cock prod at your entrance, clenching around nothing as the tip slid over your sensitive clit. He lined himself up and pressed his lips against yours to swallow any sounds you made as he gently pushed inside you. You moaned into each other in unison, and he waited, letting you settle as you nodded for him to move. Anthony began to plunge into you, easily slipping through your folds, feeling your warm cunt swallow him whole. He cupped your breast over the fabric of your dress, kneading it in his hands while breathing heavily as he bottomed out inside of you, holding you there for a moment, reveling in how impossibly soft and warm you felt around him as low whimpers escaped you.
A low grunt rumbled from his chest when he felt you fluttering around him. His hand outlined from the swell of your breasts all the way down beneath your hips, memorizing every curve, feeling the way your chest was rising and falling with every breath of pleasure that surged through you; even the way your hips instinctively moved to meet his own drove him insane. Anthony craved and wanted nothing more than to be close to you; even being inside you now, it was never close enough for him. He began to stroke your clit, already aching for attention. Your bodies rocked in sync with one another, desperate for relief. Anthony felt you whine quietly as your orgasm crashed into you. Waves of heat overwhelmed your body as you pulsed on his cock, pulling Anthony to spill himself inside of you.
Anthony pulled away from you after a moment of stolen kisses and delicate touches. He made sure you were settled on the ground and took the time to adjust himself. Moving quickly to assist you in fixing your dress and ensuring everything else was in order before opening the door to confirm no one was outside and stepping out of the closet. You may have missed the race's first leg, but with the knowing smirks and blissed-out looks on both your faces, it was well worth it.
Tag List: @bugnug @queenofmean14 (let me know if you would like to added here or dm me if you’d like to be removed)
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I do not consent to having my work reposted, translated, or published to any third party site or app. if anyone sees my work anywhere that is not ao3/tumblr or under any other username that is not whispersoftheton, it has been reposted without my permission
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fiction-is-life · 11 months
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Calling Out to You
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Summary: You reconnect with an old friend during the Season, but the young Viscount is not the same as the boy you grew up with.  Requested by @junevoidzombie​
Warnings: Description of injuries, minor character death, period misogyny, Anthony being difficult
~
“Help!” you called, starting to panic as the evening air grew cooler and the forest grew dimmer.  You sniffled and wiped your nose on the sleeve of your dress; your mama was going to be so angry, but the dress was ruined now anyways.  “Is anybody out here?” you cried.
You heard a twig snapping in the distance, and your head snapped up.  You let out a pitiful hiccup, but you finally stopped your incessant blubbering.  You waited a few more moments, hoping the sound would come closer, but it didn’t.  It must have been an animal, you thought.  
“Who’s there?” a voice called.  It didn’t sound particularly friendly, but any help was better than staying out here.  
“My name is (Y/N)!” you called back.  “I tripped and now I fear I have sprained my ankle.”
“Hold on.  I shall be there in a moment, miss,” the voice called back, this time slightly closer.  
In less than a minute, a figure started to take form in the growing darkness.  As he grew closer, you realized that he was younger than you were expecting - perhaps only three years older than yourself.  He had the most beautiful dark hair and eyes, though, and you became conscious of the horrible disarray you were currently in. 
He knelt beside you.  “I know you said your ankle is injured; is there any way you think you can stand on it, with my assistance?”
You shook your head.  “I have already tried, sir.”
“Anthony,” he interrupted.  He cleared his throat.  “You must call me Anthony, miss.”
Your face lit up with a smile.  “Then you must call me (Y/N), Anthony.  My family just moved here from Hertfordshire.  We now live at Turring Manor, and I was exploring the country when I fell.”
He smiled back shyly.  “Well, it would most likely be easier to carry you to my family’s home.  It is much closer than Turring Manor, and the sun is already setting.”
“That would be most appreciated, Anthony.  Thank you!” you replied eagerly.  
The next thing you knew, Anthony was lifting you off of the ground, being extra careful to not jostle your hurt leg too much.  Once you were off of the ground, however, Anthony looked at you while a blush crept across his cheeks.  “Um, it might be easier to walk if you put your arms around me as well.  I wouldn’t want your leg to pain you more than necessary,” he mumbled, clearly embarrassed.  
“Very well,” you whispered.  You couldn’t help your own blush as you did as he asked you.  Once that was done, he set off in the direction he had come from.
~
“Anthony, there you are darling!  Wherever have you been?”  A very beautiful woman came down the steps as you approached the very impressive home.  It must be Anthony’s mother; the resemblance was uncanny.  
“I am sorry I am late, mother, but our new neighbor fell in our woods and could not walk home,” Anthony explained. 
The lady’s eyes finally fell on you and concern filled them.  “Oh, you poor thing,” she cried.  “Anthony, bring her up to the yellow bedchamber.  I shall have the maids draw a bath and bring her something to eat.”  
Anthony’s mother sprung into action, and before you knew it, you were being laid upon a soft bed and Anthony was being shooed out of the room.  After a luxurious bath, you were given a silk nightgown borrowed from one of Anthony’s sisters.  
Said sisters (at least two of them - you had heard there was at least one more) came to keep you company before it was time to go to bed.  You could tell you all would become fast friends although the two girls were as different as could be.  Daphne was content to stay and practice piano while Eloise was always ready for an adventure.  Life would certainly not be dull living so close to Aubrey Hall.
“So Anthony really carried you all the way from the woods because you fell?” Daphne questioned as you explained what had happened that day.
“Yes, he did.  I couldn’t be more grateful; my parents would have been worried sick if they had not heard from me,” you said.
Daphne sighed, a dreamy look taking over her features.  “That is so romantic.  Like a knight rescuing the princess in the stories papa tells us.  Right, Eloise?” Daphne gushed.
Eloise rolled her eyes at her older sister’s antics.  “Anthony is hardly a knight in shining armor, Daphne.  You are being silly,” Eloise retorted.
Seeing how a fight was about to break out, you said, “He may not be a knight of olde but he certainly rescued me today.”
Eloise and Daphne looked at each other, slow smiles growing on each of their faces, making you nervous.  “Do you love our brother, (Y/N)?” they squealed in unison.
“What?  Of course not!  We just met!” you protested, but the butterflies flying in your stomach told a different story.
~
“Anthony!  You and Benedict - and Colin if he can behave himself and not eat all the biscuits - must come to my tea party this afternoon,” Daphne decreed at the breakfast table.  Her proclamation was met with several groans and one small protest of “Hey!”
Anthony scowled at his younger sister.  “Tea parties are for girls, Daphne.  Besides, I have a shooting lesson this afternoon,” he said.
Daphne beamed despite the implied insult.  “No you don’t!  I already asked papa, and he has rescheduled your lesson.  He hopes to join us for a bit after his meeting with Lord Aberly,” she said primly.  Her eyes glimmered with a spark of mischief.  “(Y/N) shall also be there,” she added in a sing-song voice.
“Fine, we shall attend your tea party.”
“Oh, come on, Anthony!  Why did you have to accept for the both of us?”
~
“Are you excited for the new baby, Ant?” you asked as you strolled in Aubrey Hall’s garden.  
He shrugged, making his broadening shoulders fill his jacket even more.  He had changed so much in the year he had been away at university, but he was still the same Anthony, thank goodness.  “I suppose.  It is always nice to welcome a new sibling, but the novelty has worn off.  Each baby is just like the last,” he chuckled.
You slapped his arm playfully, giggling as well.  “How could you say that, Anthony?” you scolded.  “Are you going to think that of your own children as well?”
You thought you saw his eyes flicker over your form with a strange expression in them, but it must have been a trick of the light for when his eyes returned to yours they were his normal welcoming brown.  
“No, I shall probably become as tender-hearted as my father when each babe is welcomed.  And dote on my wife for bringing such a miracle into the world,” he replied, that funny trick of the light occurring again and making your stomach inexplicably flip.
~
His father knelt to gather flowers for his mother, prompting Anthony to do the same.  “I shall gather some for (Y/N).  She was just admiring these daffodils the other day,” he spoke as he used his pocket knife to cut the loveliest blooms.  “I believe I will do as you suggested and ask her -”  
A thump behind him interrupted him.  
“Father?  Father!”
~
“Papa has inherited a piece of land in Scotland.  We are leaving within the week to go there.”  You stood in the door of what was now Anthony’s study.  He looked so small and lost sitting there, his late father’s portrait above him.
He nodded his head briefly before looking back down at the papers before him that required his attention.  “I shall see you when you return then.  Safe travels,” he spoke in a clipped tone.
“You don’t understand.  We are renting out Turring Manor and moving to Scotland.”
His head snapped up at this, but his eyes were distant and cold, his jaw set.  There was a pregnant pause before he spoke, “Then I wish you all the best, Miss (Y/L/N).  May God be with you.”
His terse farewell cut you like a knife.  You swallowed the lump in your throat.  “And with you, Lord Bridgerton.”
  You fled the house before anyone could see your tears fall.
~
Anthony was in the middle of his set with Miss Sherwood when there was a commotion at the entrance to the ballroom.  He looked to see a family enter, but they were blocked from his seeing their faces.  Accepting defeat, he tipped the corners of his lips up in what Miss Sherwood would know as a fond smile as he resumed their dance, forgetting the interruption entirely as the dance came to an end. 
“Brother!  How was your dance with the lovely Miss Sherwood?” Benedict clapped him on the back and handed him a glass of punch as he joined him near the terrace doors.  
He sighed, letting his austere Viscount visage fade just enough for Benedict to see how tired his brother was.  “She is well-spoken and graceful.”  He looked away from his brother and out towards the crowd.  “She shall make a wonderful Viscountess.”
Benedict’s eyes softened but Anthony refused to look at him.  “Will that be enough for you, Brother?  A wife and a mother to your children?”
Anthony fixed a glare on Benedict that would have made a lesser man shrink back and admit defeat.  “Isn’t that the point of the institution?  I shall gain an heir and somebody to take care of my households while I provide her with a name and protection from material poverty.”
“Some might add love into that mission statement,” Benedict said with a hint of sarcasm.
Anthony paused, but his mind was more made up than ever.  “I gave that notion up a long time ago, Brother.  Love brings nothing but heartache,” he spoke, his voice devoid of any emotion.
The brother’s staring contest was broken by a familiar voice.  “Lord Bridgerton, Mr. Bridgerton.”
The tall, dark haired men bowed.  “Lady Danbury, how do you do?”  Benedict took on the lion’s share of the social niceties as Anthony still had that far off look in his eyes.  He was not attending to the conversation at all, but Lady Danbury did not grow offended at his slight.
“Very well, Mr. Bridgerton.  I wanted to introduce you both to someone.  Her family has just moved back from Scotland - just in time for the season,” Lady Danbury continued, bringing you forward.
“(Y/N)!” Benedict cried, grabbing your hand to place a kiss onto your glove.
Lady Danbury raised an eyebrow in surprise, but her eyes were calculating.  “So you two know each other?”
“Miss (Y/L/N)’s family used to be our neighbors.  We spent many a day together before they moved away,” Benedict explained.  You were glad for it as your tongue was tied.  
“That is wonderful.  Then you two can help me introduce Miss (Y/L/N) to some other members of the Ton,” Lady Danbury smiled but fixed her eagle gaze on Anthony who had broken out of his stupor enough to gaze open-mouthed at you.  “Her family would like to see her settled.”
Benedict’s easy smile flashed.  “That will not be so hard a task for one as lovely as you, Miss (Y/L/N).”
You smiled wryly.  “It may become a little more challenging when people hear this is by no means my first season out,” you spoke, with that familiar teasing lilt to your voice.
“Nonsense.”  Your head snapped up at the almost angry outburst from the Viscount.  He cleared his throat.  “Many men will find you to be all the more acceptable for your age,” he said.
You smiled and Anthony made the mistake of looking at you - really looking at you - this time.  “You are right, my lord.  Many bachelors will be looking to find a wife before they themselves enter their dotage,” you teased, making Benedict laugh.
Anthony could not recover himself fast enough  - perhaps tell you that were more beautiful than the day you left - before Benedict was offering you his hand and leading you towards the dance floor.
~
“Miss (Y/L/N), may I have your next set?” Anthony intercepted you the moment Benedict led you off the dance floor.  He was spinning his signet ring on his pinkie finger.
“Of course, my lord,” you spoke even as he was already grasping your hand and leading you back onto the floor.
You spent half of the set in silence.  You could tell even after all these years when Anthony needed time to think.  You focused on the steps of the waltz and actively tried to ignore how it felt to be in his arms.
“How was Scotland?” Anthony finally broke the silence.
You blinked, startled.  “It is a most beautiful country, my lord,” you replied.
He nodded.  “Were there no eligible gentlemen there?”
Your brow furrowed.  “Of course there were many,” you sputtered.
“Why did you not wed then?”  The interrogation continued.
Your nostrils flared with your temper.  “I do not believe that is any of your business, my lord,” you stated, a hint of anger behind your words.  “I could say the same for you.”
“Yes, but I am a man; it is different.”
You scoffed, drawing the attention of some onlookers.  “Yes, I suppose it is.  I am but a woman.  Therefore my only purpose is to wed and have babies.”  You stopped dancing and broke out of his grasp.  You stood with your fists clenched at your sides.  “I heard you when you were near the terrace, my lord.  I cannot countenance how much you have changed.”
He watched in equal parts anger and despair as you walked away from him and out the doors.
~
“Mama, what are these?”  You fingered the petals of the daffodils that had been arranged in a beautiful bouquet.
“They must be from a potential suitor who saw how gracefully you danced with Benedict last night,” she replied, still not daring to mention the scene you had caused when you had stormed away from Anthony.  “There is most likely a card in them, peach.”
There was indeed.  You opened it to find a familiar neat hand.
I remembered these were your favourites, is all it read.
You closed the card and slipped it into your pocket.  “They are just from Lord Bridgerton.  An apology for our row.”
You purposely did not meet your mother’s eye so as not to see the look of disappointment that overtook her features.
~
“Who is that walking with Lady Danbury?”
“That is Miss (Y/L/N),” Benedict quickly informed the fair-haired earl he and Anthony had been walking with along with Miss Sherwood.  “Would you like me to introduce you both?  She is an old friend of our family.”
“Oh, yes, Mr. Bridgerton, that would be delightful!” Miss Sherwood cried.  “Wouldn’t it be, Lord Bridgerton?”
Anthony nodded, his lips pressed in a thin line.  “Most delightful.”
You and Lady Danbury had already come upon the group, and you paused.  “Miss (Y/L/N), you must allow me to introduce my good friend Lord James Thatcher, the Earl of Wembey and Miss Sherwood of Bath.”
You curtsied politely to the both of them.  “It is a pleasure to meet you both,” you said smoothly, years of good breeding taking over as your mind reeled.  So this was the Miss Sherwood that he had spoken of.  
“Miss (Y/L/N), would you care to join me on a small boat ride on the lake?  It is the perfect weather for it,” Lord Wembey addressed you directly, startling you.  You could feel Lady Danbury’s gaze on you.
“That would be most lovely, my lord,” you spoke as you took his proffered arm.
~
“Lord Wembey has invited us to attend the theater tonight with him in his box.  Is that not lovely, my dear?” your mama crowed.  This would not be the first time the handsome earl had singled you out in his attentions.  They had become quite marked indeed.
“That is wonderful, mama,” you replied, not looking up from your needlework.  “Shall I wear the yellow silk, do you think?”  And the conversation turned back to fashion plates and fripperies.
~
The pall mall ball soared into the air - straight into the woods and definitely nowhere near the intended target.  You were never good at pall mall, but what you lacked in talent you made up for in enthusiasm.  And the annual tournament was no exception - especially since it was your first after returning.
“I suppose (Y/N) must return to the woods,” Eloise teased.  “Hopefully you do not need to rescue her this time, Anthony.”
“Rescue her?  Whatever do you mean, Miss Bridgerton?” Miss Sherwood asked.  
You and Anthony both opened your mouths to explain, but Benedict beat you to it.  “Many years ago, Miss (Y/L/N) was walking in our woods when she injured herself.  Luckily for her, though, Anthony was there to help her home.”
“Oh, how wonderful!  It was like fate brought you together,” Miss Sherwood gushed, just as Daphne had all those years ago.
Anthony cleared his throat and brushed his free hand down his pant leg, trying to dislodge an imaginary piece of lint.  “Yes, well, it was a very long time ago, and I am sure the memory has been distorted until it seems much loftier than it is,” he spoke, more harshly than he meant in his flustered state.  “Shall we play on?  I believe it was your turn, Miss Sherwood.”
~
“I have noticed Lord Wembey and (Y/N) are spending a great deal of time together, Brother,” Daphne spoke as she entered Anthony’s study.  
“Have they?  I have not really noticed,” Anthony spoke with a clenched jaw, his pen arrested in mid air where it dropped a rogue dot of ink on the otherwise pristine page.
Daphne tilted her head and pursed her lips - a look she had perfected from childhood.  “I find that hard to believe, Brother.  Everyone expects him to propose - perhaps even tonight at mama’s ball,” she said.  She huffed lightly as Anthony still did not look up from his work.  “And people are also wondering why you have not proposed to Miss Sherwood yet.”
Anthony finally set down his pen and looked at her.  “How are those two connected, Sister?” he ground out.
Daphne did not break eye contact.  “Some people are saying that you have not proposed to Miss Sherwood because you hold a tendre for (Y/N),” she explained.
“Why would I care about the words of gossips?”  Anthony growled.
Daphne leaned forward, her face set just as hard as his.  “You may not care, but if you do not fix this, you could inadvertently tarnish (Y/N)’s reputation and ruin her chances at an excellent match.”  
Daphne made her way back towards the corridor.  “Maybe think about that, Brother,” she said before she shut the door behind her.
~
You rode fast and hard, uncaring of anything but getting away.  You did not even care that the skies looked as if they would open up at any second and flood the ground beneath you.  It would only be too fitting for your mood.
Another one.
You had rejected another perfectly suitable gentleman.  
What was wrong with you?  Lord Wembey was everything you were looking for in a husband.  He was young, titled, wealthy beyond measure, kind hearted, well-read.  He could do with some darker hair, but that was beyond his control.
You drew your horse up short at that thought.  Were you seriously comparing Lord Wembey to Anthony - yes, for he was still Anthony in your thoughts - and finding Lord Wembey wanting?
You breathed heavily as that thought washed over you, and you wanted to scream.
As if your thoughts had summoned him, Anthony appeared on horseback.  He cut an even more impressive figure than he used to, but that was no wonder.  His eyes locked on you, and he turned his horse to meet yours.
And you fled.
You could feel him following you, his better knowledge of the ground and larger steed allowing him to gain ground rapidly.  You could feel the promised rain start to pummel your back, but you pushed your horse faster.  Eating up ground faster than you could see it as your vision was blurred with rain and tears.  
“(Y/N), watch out!” were the last words you heard before your body slammed into the ground.
~
You opened your eyes to see it was already light in your bedroom.  Your mother sat beside you.  “Mama?” you rasped, wincing at how it made your head ache.
The lines on your mother’s face smoothed as she looked at you, before promptly starting to sob.  “Oh, you are awake!  We thought we had lost you forever!”
You scrunched your forehead as you tried to sit up.  You were immediately assisted by two maids.  “What happened, mama?”
“Oh, you would have been lost without him!  Going out for a ride in horrific weather, what were you thinking?” your mother was working up into one of her fits of hysteria.
“Mama!” you broke her off.  “Lost without whom?”
“Oh, Anthony, of course!  He saw you get thrown from your horse, and he carried you all the way back on his.  He personally saw that the doctor was fetched, too, wonderful boy,” she gushed.
You fiddled with the comforter, unsure of what to say.  
There was a knock on the door. You turned your head to see Anthony standing there, fidgeting with his signet ring just as he did in the days immediately following his father’s death.
“I shall leave you two to have a moment of privacy,” your mother whispered as she stood.
You attempted to reach out to her, stop her, but she was too quick.  She beckoned the two maids to follow her but left the door open for propriety’s sake.  
Anthony did not move from his position near the door even after your mother vacated the room.  The air felt heavy, and you were finding it hard to breathe.  You smoothed the bedcovers although they were practically perfect.
“I am so relieved you are awake,” Anthony croaked, his voice raspy with disuse.
You steadfastly continued your study of the linens.  “I am told I have you to thank for that, my lord.”  You congratulated yourself on keeping your tone even.
“Will you stop that?” Anthony’s tone was sharp, and you finally looked at him fully.  His face was drawn, and it was clear he had not shaved in a few days.
“Stop what, my lord?” you asked, genuinely confused.
He walked towards your bed, his face red.  “Calling me that,” he practically spat.  
You scoffed, not believing he was truly acting so childish.  “Well, it is your title.  It would be improper for me not to -”
“Marry me, then.”
You must have hit your head harder than you thought for you were certainly hearing things.  “What?” you breathed.
Anthony knelt at your side and took your hand tenderly in his.  “Marry me, (Y/N), please,” he implored.  He shook his head.  “I should have asked you ten years ago, but I thought I could prevent my heart from breaking by not letting it be touched.”  His gaze fell on your joined hands.  He cleared his throat.  “I was a fool.  I disregarded the fact that it had already been stolen from me.”
His warm brown orbs found yours, and you felt your heart climb into your throat.  You took a rattling breath as your eyes stung with tears.
“Anthony…” you breathed.
No further words were needed as your lips joined in the kiss you had always been waiting for.
~
My Masterlist
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writingmeraki · 11 months
Text
you're no good for me.
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a min ho oneshot !
summary : five times you thought he didn't care and the one time he showed you he did.
( or five times you were oblivious to how much he truly cared and the one time he made it obvious. )
genre : angst ( a bit? ) fluff, comedy ( attempts )
pairing : minho x gn!reader, e2l, frenemies to lovers! idiots to lovers!
warnings : cussing, descriptions of blood,injuries and bruises, reader is pretty oblivious, mentions of underage drinking, kissing, kinda messy :/// ( lmk if i missed anything pls. )
author's note : i don't even know what to say tbh ? this is so much longer than I thought to the point where I think I may have rushed the ending lmfaoooooooo welp I hope u enjoy this still haha <3 sorry for the wait 🤕🤕🤕 ( my own lovers to enemies arc with this fic bcoz I overthought as usual ) let me know what you think !!! also anon pls the angst was less but like it was a v lighthearted fic from the beginning asdfgh- i still hope u like it 😔<3 also also i kinda have a little drabble as a continuation for this but I'll see if i wanna post it based on your feedback hehe so let me know! ( barely proofread <3 )
word count : 11.6K ( longest oneshot i've ever written omll )
based on this request !
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THE FIRST TIME.
"Fuck why do I feel like someone just pounded my head with a hammer?!"
You groaned as you woke up from your sleep or rather lack of sleep. You'd only been able to get barely 2 hours of sleep when you'd gotten back from the party last night
A party that you didn't even want to go to but were emotionally blackmailed to and even worse it was fucking Minho's party.
Technically, it's his fault you're in this state of crankiness.
You were sitting up on your bed, hair in all directions as you nursed the headache you'd gotten. Lack of sleep really gave you the worst of headaches and it didn't help you'd drunk a little, not more than a few sips, but the after-effect was definitely there.
You hissed as your bare feet touched the cold floor before you finally found your fuzzy bunny slippers you'd gotten as a gift from Kitty.
You dragged yourself out of your room, now being able to make out people talking on the other side.
"Well look who we have here looking like an absolute angel."
"Shut it Minho."
The retort came out like second nature as Minho smirked at your state despite the tiny concern that flashed across his face when he saw you holding your head as you sat on the floor between Kitty and Q who only shared a look when they definitely didn't miss that flash of concern.
You looked at Q, questioning "So why are we having a family meeting here?"
"We were just having a discussion about weird dreams." Kitty answered you and you looked at her, humming and suddenly a light bulb lit up from your only two alive braincells.
"You had a sex dream." Both Q and you said at the same time, him sitting up while a smirk just formed on your face.
"Was it about Dae?" Q asked holding his coffee in his hand. Kitty's eyes widened and shook her head immediately.
"So it wasn't about Dae, huh." You said as you wondered, your slightly swollen eyes blinking in thought.
"No! No I didn't say I had a sex dream." Kitty tried defending herself.
You lightly snorted, yawning a bit, "You didn't have to though."
"Exactly now spill." Q continued and you noticed movement from behind and saw Minho coming, with three mugs in his hand, handing one to Kitty and one to you.
He was oddly quiet and stiff, now wondering what made him like that because he'd definitely would have said something snarky by now.
"-dreams don't mean anything!" Kitty's voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you sipped your coffee skeptically hoping it's not poisoined, but you hummed in satisfaction at the sweetness that contrasted the bitterness.
It was exactly how you liked it. Not too bitter like how people would usually drink it, you preferred it sweet because you had a huge sweet tooth.
Minho's gaze shifted towards you, recalling something as he swallowed nervously when he saw the small grin on your face.
"She's right! They don't mean anything." He suddenly looked towards Q who was already looking at him with his eyebrows raised, sipping his own cup.
Your eyes opened and you lazily looked at Minho, whose body language seemed even more stiff now.
"You could have a sex dream about someone you've repulsed your whole life." You looked in confusion at his words, one eyebrow raised.
Kitty agreed "Yes, yes exactly thank you Minho."
"He could have a sex dream about someone like…Y/N!"
You almost choked on your coffee before you spat out what was in your mouth, as Minho had a similar reaction.
"So you had a sex dream about Y/N." Q said as if it was the most obvious thing and you looked at him in horror.
"Hello?? Why are you talking about me as if I'm literally not here?" You were ignored as Minho quickly defended himself,
"No I didn't." He said, avoiding looking at you as you continued to stare at him with your eyes widened.
"And if I did have a sex dream about Y/N, it'd be a sex nightmare." You scoffed at his words while Kitty whispered Oh my God.
"Please, you'd be lucky to even have me in your dreams let alone real life." You spoke before you could think about it.
"So you still had sex?" Q piped up and Minho quickly blurted,
"Dreams don't mean anything! Besides I hate Y/N!" He said sparing a glance at you who just seemed confused at where this conversation had led up to.
"Wait a minute-"
"We're getting late! I still uh need to get ready!" Minho said turning around before you could even question anything, not being able to see how red his face had gotten as he ran to his room and slammed the door shut.
Blinking once and twice, you looked at Kitty and Q,
"So can someone just tell me what happened?"
They indeed didn't tell you anything, or rather didn't get a chance to before the door was knocked on and in came in your advisor, telling you about how you all had gotten Saturday detention and hoped last night was worth it.
You groaned as he left, holding the cup of coffee mumbling curse words. The same cup of coffee, that was exactly how you liked it, that was made by Minho. Something you didn't even realize how he knew your perfect order.
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THE SECOND TIME.
You'd rather be watching paint dry than be in this boring detention.
Saturday flew in and in no time, were you already sitting in the library for your eight hour detention.
You groaned as you leaned forward, wanting to drop your head on the table before a hand placed itself between it and the hard surface of the table, making you hit it softly and for a second you thought about how warm it felt.
"You'll damage the tiny amount of brain cells you have in there." Minho's voice mocked you, as you looked up, your chin laying on his hand.
Glaring, you didn't even realise how he gulped at how you'd still maintain physical contact by not lifting your head up.
"Screw you." You scoffed, sitting straight up,
"Why am I even sitting with you?" You questioned crossing your arms and the scowl didn't leave your face.
"Maybe you finally realized how obsessed you are with me and felt like you had to be closer to me." He said with that annoying smirk plastered on his face.
You snorted, "Please it's only because it was the only seat available!"
The smirk didn't leave his face, only growing wider as he leaned in to whisper in your ear,
"All I'm hearing is excuses." His voice rang in your ears, noticing the rasp and how deep it sounded, swallowing nervously, you didn't know why you felt like your heart would jump out of your chest.
You leaned away from him, rolling your eyes, brushing away what you felt as irritation from being around Minho too much.
You shivered due to the temperature in the library being too low for your liking, the air conditioning being colder than you would have kept it.
You internally cussed at yourself for wearing a crop top instead of bringing an extra sweater with you,forgetting it's usually chilly in there.
Minho noticed the shiver, rolling his eyes, he suddenly began taking off his own bomber jacket. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion but they relaxed when you felt a sudden warmth engulf you.
"You'll catch a cold and it'll end up infecting everyone." He scolded you before you could even say anything, words dying down before you could even question his actions, too stunned.
You just blinked at him, mumbling a small thanks to which he just sent you a curt nod, his attention back to the doodling he'd been doing in his book.
"Did he just-"
"Yes. Yeah he did."
Kitty questioned to which Yuri answered both stunned at what they'd just seen.
"Don't they, I don't know, hate each other?" Yuri asks, confused looking back at Kitty.
"Guess hate and love are two sides of the same coin, afterall huh?" Kitty spoke up.
They both paused and looked at each other, bursting out in giggles.
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THE THIRD TIME.
You stared at the clock, your eyes fixated on the minute hand that moved agonizingly slow, your head resting on the palm of your chin that was using your right arm as a stand.
You sighed mumbling to yourself about how time seemed to be against you.
“Instead of boring your eyes into the clock, maybe if you paid attention to what was being taught, your tiny brain could finally excel in this.”
You rolled your eyes and turned your head towards the boy who sat beside you.
Pausing a bit when you realised how the sunlight from the window literally made it seem like he glowed, his cheekbones highlighted by it and his lips seemingly more plump and pinker as he spoke.
Minho’s attentions wasn’t on you though, at least it would seem like that because he was staring ahead, his focus on his notes as he wrote what was being taught, his hands splayed across his notebooks.
Even when he sat, you noticed he still seemed taller than you. Sometimes you even wonder how you always end up next to him.
“I’d say take a photo and it would last longer but I’m pretty sure you already have enough of those with you, stalker.” He said, taking a peak at you from the corner of his eyes, a smirk forming on his face when he saw you scoffing.
“As if, besides since when did you care about me paying attention or not.” Minho stopped for a second at your words, hand freezing mid way from his note taking and it was now his turn to roll his eyes at you.
“Because you’re a distraction.” He spoke lowly, making sure you were the only one who heard, and only now you noticed you’d both been murmuring amongst each other as if you were friends just gossiping.
Not wanting to argue more, you just sighed and looked ahead,
“Ugh, whatever.”
You looked down at your own notebook, narrowing your eyes when you saw you’d only written half a page and stealing a glance at Minho’s, your eyes now widening when you counted that he was already on what seemed like his third page.
Damn I really must have zoned out.
Now you just thought of your options, either you skip some pages and just write what was being taught at the moment, finishing what you missed afterwards.
Clicking your tongue, you just closed your notebook, slightly pushing it away. Knowing being at the way back in a crowded classroom was helpful at times like this but having Alex as your professor being another advantage, you folded your arms on the table and plopped your head onto it sideways.
You sighed, relieved at the position, even though it may seem uncomfortable, but at the time, it felt just right.
You shut your eyes, the last thing you saw being Mingo from the way you had positioned your head, with you facing towards him and let yourself be surrounded by the temporary darkness.
“So you’re just going to sleep during the lecture?”
“Yep.” You said still with your eyes closed.
“I barely got any, considering the Vampire Diaries marathon Kitty and I had last night.”
You mumbled, feeling yourself give in to your dreamland.
“You both are terrible roommates because who even has a series marathon in the middle of a school week?” Minho asked you scoffing, turning his head to his left so he could look down at you.
You opened one eye and put your tongue out childishly to mock him,
“Only the fun kind of roommates, now shut up and do your work, let me sleep.”
“You seriously need to be more responsible, I mean come on, you have dark circles right now.” He whisper yelled as he scanned your face.
“Okay mum. I’ll make sure of it.” You murmured to him, the last of your words being softer as you finally gave in to your dreams.
Minho sighed when he heard you exhale softly, seeing the way the sun reflected on your face.
He wondered how you could just fall asleep but then again he knew you’d probably stayed awake just to give company because he knew you didn’t even like The Vampire Diaries.
You’d once told how lame you found it that the only relevant plot was two brothers fighting for a girl, and how it was ridiculously stupid.
He moved his body a bit forward, so that the sunlight could not fall on your face, and upon that the scrunch in your brows relieved unconsciously. He reached his hand forward to tuck away the hair piece that seemed to bother you. His fingertips lingering on your cheek and you leaned into the touch unknowingly.
Pulling his hand away, he gently smiled at you, shaking his head fondly as he brought back his attention to what was being taught.
[ a few moments later ]
“Wake up sleeping beauty, it’s time.” You heard as you felt someone flick your forehead.
Groaning you swatted away the hand, as you slowly rose up, rubbing your eyes, and blinking a few times as you tried recalling who you were and where you were.
“Seems like someone’s nap time was well.” Minho smirked at you, packing his books away to which you turned to him and glared.
“Hope you dreamt of me well!” He said a grin on his face now as your lips pulled into a thin line.
“Yeah it’d be more of a nightmare if you showed up in my dreams.” You said rolling your eyes, and gathering your own notebook, realising it was pretty pointless to have even removed it today as you basically barely wrote anything.
You pulled your bag up to the desk and tucked away your book.
Minho slid a book towards you, making you pause your movements as you glanced at him in question.
“Here, today’s class work and homework as well, if you don’t get something, considering you probably won’t, come to the library after school is over.” He said standing up, to which you still looked between him and the book in question, skeptical of his sudden act of…kindness?
“Stop staring idiot, you’ll get late.” He said as he slowly walked away, you thought about it and grabbed his notebook, putting it in between your own and standing up, sliding one strap on your shoulder.
“Thank…you?” You said turning around noticing he was already gone.
Huh, weird. Well that was nice of him…for once.
You shook your head, walking out as well, realizing you indeed learn something new about him every time.
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THE FOURTH TIME.
It was another outing of the nature club you'd join in support of Kitty's new venture of wanting to do new things.
Although initially, you'd reluctantly agreed but you'd learn to enjoy it once you spent more times with nature.
Though sometimes you wish you could just jump off the cliff because lo and behold, Minho had also spontaneously joined it as well.
Over time, you'd just learnt to ignore his shit, just paying attention to your surroundings and focusing all your energy on that.
You didn't even notice how he'd always be trailing beside you though, since the beginning of it actually.
But of course those around you did.
Q and Dae looked at their best friend, both wondering the same thing.
"Do you think he notices?" Dae asked as they hiked up, Q looked at him in question and followed his gaze, perceiving what he meant.
“He is still in denial as to why he even joined this club in the first place, remember how much I tried convincing him to join but he always refused with bullshit excuses but suddenly when Y/N joins, he’s apparently thought about it well and understood it was good to be one with nature, hence why he would be joining.”
Dae shook his head, chuckling as he recalled the denial on his face from when they confronted him about it.
“I don’t even think he realizes that Q, let alone how he always seems to be beside them when he gets the chance.” Dae said, staring at the pair of you, you seemed more than happy to be there as Minho skeptically walked beside you.
Suddenly an arm was placed in front of you, making you suddenly freeze in your place and your gaze followed it to the owner, confusion flooding your mind as you looked at Minho in question.
He moved in front of you and knelt down on one knee, to which your eyes widened and you looked around to see if anyone else was seeing this.
Hissing at him, more so in confusion, "What the hell are you doing?"
He scoffed and pointed down at your shoes, more so your shoe laces.
"You'll literally trip on them and fall on your face resulting in you getting hurt and you'll end up causing problems."
Once again, your mouth gaped at him as he went back to his task which was tying your shoelaces.
At times, he truly did confuse the ever living fuck out of you. Because for one he'd be doing the nicest things but then the gesture would be contradicting with what he would have to say afterwards.
You noticed how strands of his hair moved out of place as a result of him looking down to focus on tying your laces.
You bit your lip to control the smile from spreading on your face and he got up, dusting his hands.
"You know you should be grateful that I decided to be with you right now otherwise your clumsy ass would have probably broken a foot by now."
There it was. The contradicting words to his gestures.
Not wanting to start an argument, you just sighed and shook your head, mumbling a thanks as you walked ahead, having been left behind by a few paces.
Minho glared at you, taking a few steps to catch up with you,
"That was mean of you." He said and you took a side glance at him to see a frown on his face and you sighed once again,
"Thank you so much Minho, whatever would I have done if it weren't for your presence."
You grinned widely, blinking your eyes forcefully as you fluttered your eyelashes.
Before he could speak again, you turned forward and rolled your eyes, continuing your hike.
When you reached the top view, you could see the entire city of Seoul and just how mesmerizing it looked.
As a whole it looked breathtaking, the tall buildings and the miniature figures doing about their own things, the sky's colours contrasting the shades, the sun setting slowly as the last warmth of it bled on your face.
You didn't even notice Minho was right beside you, admiring the city view as well. Though his eyes naturally drifted towards you, even if he never wanted them to but it seemed like second nature to him now, his eyes finding you anytime you were around.
Your own sparked as you took in the little details of the view, unknowingly a smile forming on your face making the tiny depths form on your cheeks. Your hair slightly moving from the soft breeze and you'd laugh at the timing but you didn't notice that as you were too in your own world.
Blinking, he felt his own heart flutter as he whispered so tenderly, you probably wouldn't have heard him if he weren't next to you,
"Beautiful, you really are beautiful."
Looking beside you, you were once again left speechless when you saw who it was, and pretended you didn't hear, asking
"Sorry what was that?"
That seemed to snap him out of his gaze as he looked in front, coughing into his hand, sounding more fake than real,
"Uh, I meant that the view is really beautiful! Yeah the view…" He looked to the other side to make sure you wouldn't see the redness forming on his face.
You just nodded at him, turning your attention back in front of you,
"It is, isn't it? It was definitely worth the hike!"
You beamed as you put your hands on your hips, happy with the end result of the exhausting hike.
"Anyways we should be heading down now, if we were to reach before nightfall."
You paused looking around and found Q and Dae already looking at you both, you waved them over.
"Q! Dae! Why didn't I see both during the hike up?"
"Maybe cause someone wouldn't leave you and your attention was on him mostly." Q murmured to which, luckily you didn't seem to catch what he said as you raised an eyebrow.
Dae nudged Q with his elbow on his stomach, to which Q hissed in a little pain.
"That was so unnecessary!" Dae still kept his smile,
"What he meant was, you seem preoccupied but really we were trailing behind too." He told, his eyes shifting to Minho's for one second when he said preoccupied and you noticed this.
"Well let's all go together for the hike down?"
Minho wanted to protest but he realised it'd probably seem suspicious and knowing how his best friends were, they'd figure it and look into this more than he would like them too.
Plus he wasn't entirely sure why he detested the idea of not being able to be with you only for the hike down.
He hated your guts didn't he? He only just…taught you were too clumsy and stupid, as well as unserious.
At least that was what he kept convincing himself, yet it was far more obvious to everyone around you except yourselves that there was definitely more than just animosity.
And as you began going down the steps, you almost tripped as your leg got caught in a root but lucky for you, there was Minho by your other side, who'd pulled your arm to make sure you didn't fall right on your face.
"Seriously if it weren't for me, you'd probably end up dead by now."
His hand still on your arm, the contact making you feel warmer than you should and for a second your eyes drifted towards his lips as you thought about just how close you were to him.
You pulled away your arm and gulped, nodding at his words nonchalantly as you couldn't get the image of his lips out of your mind, as much as you hated it.
Q and Dae again, shared a look as if silently communicating,
Yep, there's more to this than just animosity.
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THE FIFTH TIME.
Frowning at the big red F on your Korean Literature test, you felt like bursting into tears.
Really it wasn't your fault you were bad at adjusting to the language, after all it'd only been a few months since you were taught about it afresh.
Kitty sighed at your frowny face, texting your shared group chat about canceling today's movie night for the time being, your phone on silent since you'd gotten the test.
kitty loml 💗 : guys no movie night today, y/n's not feeling too well :((((
You didn't even notice it but Minho immediately texted in the group chat when he read the message.
minhoe 👹 : what happened????
dae my bae 🥳 : wow look who spawned in this "lame gc" 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
👑 : ohhh he's right tho but srsly what happened? are they alright???
kitty loml 💗 : Korean Lit happened 😶
👑 : Ohhhh yikes.
Kitty set aside her phone and looked back at you before you spoke,
"What am I doing wrong? I'm trying my best and it just seems pointless now." You feel tears of frustration forming as you yanked the paper away because it just seemed like the red mark was taunting you.
"Y/N, you know it's not your fault, Korean is really hard to learn afresh and see your Korean is way better than mine already!"
She tried cheering you up and you just shook your head.
"No Kitty, I've been learning this longer than you have and it's not even helping me at all if this is the end result!" You wiped harshly at the tears that poured out, your voice snapping at the end.
You sighed as you saw Kitty flinch, not in fear but more so in surprise because she didn't expect you to snap, yet she knew everyone had their own days.
Exhaling softy, you spoke "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap, I'll just…I'm going to take a shower to cool down."
Before she could reply, you turned away, walking to your room, before you slammed your door shut harsher than you wished.
👑 : how's the situation?
kitty loml 💗 : wellll they've gone to take a shower now, but they are pretty upset.
👑 : oh that's not great.
minhoe 👹 : wait guys, what flavour of Pocky was their favourite again? Cookies and cream or chocolate?
kitty loml 💗 : y r u asking this out of nowhere and I'm pretty sure it's just plain chocolate.
dae my bae 🥳 : oh wait didn't you read the previous messages? anyways it was a pretty long thing but in short Minho went to the grocery store to get some snacks for Y/N cause he's "sure" they haven't eaten yet because of how 'forgetful" they are
👑 : code for comfort snacks for an upset y/n to make them feel better because i care but won't admit it.
minhoe 👹 : gosh you all are do fuckinf annoying
kitty loml 💗 : and you are so fucking whipped
👑 : oop pretty sure i can see him blushing all the way from here
dae my bae 🥳 : he just cussed out loud and now we're getting glared at by some grandma, good going minHOE 👹
slayest of the slayers 🙏 : lol
👑 : OMGFJZJZ HIII HELLO R U OKAYY???
kitty loml 💗 : i thought the giggles were me going insane but it was you okay.
slayest of the slayers 🙏 : one way to say i live in ur mind 😈😈 and yes Q, i am fine for now at least, I'll figure out how to conqure this stupid subject somehow.
minhoe 👹 : plzzz it'd be like having a demon in ur head
👑 : YOU shouldn't say that when y/n is probably in ur mind all day and also feel free to message any of us for help when u need it!
You turned off your phone, laughing as you heard the notifications in your group chat blow up.
You'd gotten out of the shower, feeling way better than you had but still just choosing to lay in your bed when you noticed your notifications were piling up.
You giggled when you read through the chats, intervening and feeling your heart at ease when you thought about your friends worrying over you and checking up on you.
You were grateful to have found them, especially considering you were so new and awkward when you joined KISS, thinking you'd never make friends but now you could proudly say you loved them with all you had.
Though as you laid, gazing up at the celing lit up with lights from outside, you thought of one particular person whose actions nowadays made you more confused than anything.
It was Minho, of course.
Lately it seemed he'd taken a place in your mind, ironically having flashbacks to your conversation in the group chat about you occupying his mind but it was more of the opposite on your side.
At least that was what you thought.
You thought over every gesture of his, everytime he seemed to show he cared but then you recalled his harsh words those times and stepped back a bit from your fantasies.
He was too different anyways, a star out of your reach, a boundary you feared to cross, a line that was the more blatant.
So why did your heart feel heavier at the idea of him being out of league?
You gulped when you mentally weighed your options, closing your eyes and thinking of his annoying smirk but even more his annoyingly pretty smile that was rare but when you did see it, it did something to you that made you feel all fuzzy. His annoying hair that always had strands misplaced which you always itched the urged to tuck them back gently, his soft lips, his eyes-
A knock on your door woke you up and you got up putting your hand on your chest.
The pattering in it making it feel like you just ran a whole marathon.
You rose up and quietly walked to your door.
You think you almost puked your guts out of nervousness when you saw who was on the other end.
"You need to check on your messaging skills." You stayed frozen as Minho pushed you aside and entered your room as though he owned the place. It was like something he had that once he entered a room, it naturally became his place.
You noticed he had a bag of something in his hands and you remembered the texts in the group chats.
"Oh wait, did you really?" You asked pointing towards the bag,as he plopped down on your bed, looking at you while rolling his eyes.
"Of course, I know you'd probably starve yourself if you could, that's why I bought something for you." He said and you made your way towards him, a little skeptical and your nerves didn't seem to have calmed.
You sat down beside him, a bit of distance between you two yet you still felt a bit dizzy considering this was probably the first time he'd been in your room.
He pushed the bag towards you, looking at you expectantly.
"Here, it's mostly what you like, as far as I know." You looked through the assortment and indeed, it was like all of your favourites in one.
Your mind couldn't wrap around the fact that it was Minho out of everyone that remembered all your favorite snacks. A little detail but you found it fluttering when someone would remember the smallest things about you. Only this time it felt like your heart would jump out of your chest as you thought about this.
"Well, are you feeling better now?" You snapped your head towards him, nodding absentmindedly.
"Look. Since I am feeling nice, I'll help you out. I can tutor you between 5-7 every Wednesday and Friday at the library. I checked your schedule and saw you were also free those days-"
"Wait what? Where did you even get my schedule???" You genuinely asked confused trying to comprehend his words.
"Out of all that, that's what you want to know?" Rolling his eyes, he crossed his arms "I saw it during the start of the year, to see which classes I'd have to tolerate you in and mentally prepare myself for."
"..." You narrowed your eyes at him suspiciously.
"Oh…Kay?" You said more so questionably, wondering if you'd ever invest your time in someone like that, especially if it were someone you don't like.
He got up to leave, not wanting to embarrass himself more than he thought he did.
"Well uh…I am gonna go now, don't be late! Or I swear I'm never doing anything nice for your dumbass ever again!Don't forget to eat those, seriously I spent money and my precious time in those." He rushed to your door, turning back one last time to you.
"...Just…just next time, ask for help when you need it alright? And it's okay to not do well at times even if you do your best, sometimes it's not your fault." He looked at you expectantly to which you just nodded, still flabbergasted by his actions since he arrived.
He gave one last nod and turned around, slamming the door closed.
What the fuck just happened ?
You asked more so to yourself as you looked the bag in your hands, Minho's words ringing in your head, him offering to tutor you, actually telling you he'd be tutoring you.
Just him. Him and his…kind gestures?
You groaned, setting the bag down beside your bed and falling flat on your bed.
You stared at the ceiling looking for answers for questions you didn't even know about.
And suddenly a sentence rang through your mind.
Gasping loudly as you sat up, wide eyed as an epiphany hit you,
Fuck.
I think I like him.
I like Minho.
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THAT ONE TIME.
As a normal person would when they come to be able to identify the confusion and chaos their mind was in and why they were in that state, you did one thing.
Avoid it and the cause of it.
In other words, as a way to deal with the realization of your liking, you decided to just avoid Minho at all costs, at least until it would come to bite you eventually.
You knew your friends noticed your behavior, how you'd basically changed routes and even certain classes, pouring excuses like you couldn't study during that time and it was better to change.
The new revelation caused a lot of changes in the way you saw of his actions. It definitely didn't help when you would recall at the times he'd done them late in the night and it would leave you with a hope that was only growing higher.
Only to come crashing down when you would think about how he might not even see you in the same way, maybe it was just as a friend.
Frenemies.
A term you learnt and as much as you felt like it certainly fit your dynamic, it still left a bitter afterthought that you hated because you knew you wanted more.
Much more.
As you sat down in a cafeteria in Seoul to study, yes you'd gone that far as to avoid studying at the campus just to avoid bumping into Minho.
And to your misfortune,Minho did notice though, how you didn't show up to the library for your planned study session that you'd confirmed but cancelled last minute, how you didn't even reply to messages in the group chat, excuses like you were busy with work and assignments.
He'd scoff when you pulled that excuse, as if you weren't in the same grade and didn't have the same workload. When he would ask Kitty or Q or anyone actually, they'd also have similar answers, not knowing where you were or you were locked in your room most of the time when Kitty would come to ask you for anything.
You felt guilty for avoiding your friends like that, even Minho didn't deserve that especially considering he'd even offered to help you.
With a sigh, you opened your books and tried to study at least until it was near time to go back to your dorms.
[ a few hours later ]
After a somewhat successful study session of you attempting to finish your Korea Lit assignment that'd been eating your brains quite literally as you felt a headache forming when you realized you didn't understand anything, you decided you had enough.
Groaning exhaustedly, you winded up your books and packed them, deciding it was time to just head back, frankly there'd been so much on your mind you were pretty sure that was probably one of the major reasons you didn't understand anything academic related.
Or you were just terrible at Korean Literature and really should have just stepped in your ego and crushed it when Minho offered to help you and gone to his tutoring lessons.
But noo you just had to have an epiphany that you really liked him, in a romantic way that same day he offered.
Deciding you deserved some kind of reward for tolerating and trying at least, you took a little detour to the grocery store that was along the way.
Purchasing a lychee moju moju along with some small snacks to eat, you quickly rushed to head back to campus before Kitty came back to your dorms from the library.
Memorizing her schedule so as to know when to avoid her became a part of your routine, a benefit was it was quite similar to the rest of them so you could also avoid them all at once. At least until you were ready.
Lost in your thoughts, you didn't even notice something in front of you until it was too late.
And when you took a step and a loud hiss followed that scared you so bad,you literally tripped on your own feet and fell straight to the hard concrete, face first.
Luckily you'd been able to divert your face sideways so to make sure there'd be less of an impact on your precious nose.
Now it was your turn to hiss as you groaned, rising on your hands to get up slowly.
The right side of your face was the one that had contact with the ground so it hurt like a fucking bitch when you tried to move.
As you rose up to your feet, you caressed the side of your injured face and winced when you felt something warm and wet.
Sighing exhaustedly when you indeed saw it was blood.
You're such a clumsy ass.
Words unknowingly flashed in your mind, words that a certain someone once told you and back then you were annoyed but now you felt that they really were right.
As much as it hurts your ego to admit that.
Suddenly you saw something small moving in the corner of your eye, the street being lit up only by street lights placed around five meters apart.
As you moved closer, you hoped this wasn't a grave mistake and you were not walking to your own death.
As you removed your phone from your left pocket to flash your flashlight because it had been in an area where the streetlight did not cover the range hence it was sort of dark.
You braced yourself for the worse,
Okay calm down, you can run for it and you'll save your—
Wait.
What?
You deadpanned once you saw what was hidden in the dark.
It was a cat.
A brown and black one and it was caressing its tail, hissing at you once you flashed your phone at it.
You connected the dots and sighed in relief, knowing it wasn't a murderer and it wasn't a trap; rather you had likely stepped on its tail when you didn't notice it in front of you due to its color being less visible in the dark spot.
A sense of guilt crept up on you when you thought about how you must have hurt it, even if it was unintentionally.
Deciding you'd help it, at least by giving it something to eat, you grabbed your grocery bag that sadly laid out splayed out.
Knowing you didn't have anything cat friendly to feed, you pointed at it as if talking to it.
"I'll be back! Stay here."
Turning around and making a second round trip to the grocery store, not even realizing it was nearing dangerously close to your curfew.
You didn't even notice the look of pure concern on the cashier's face, having forgotten your injuries both as a result of adrenaline basically numbing the pain and also you being in a hurry when you noted the time.
Surprisingly the cat was still in its spot, eyes closed and sitting with its head tilted who you knelt down to it.
You opened the can of tuna and your nose scrunched in disgust at the smell, but someone else was delighted as it leaned forward immediately.
Chuckling at the cat's eagerness, you placed it on the ground and it dived right in, devouring the tuna.
"You probably haven't eaten in a while huh?"
Gazing at the cat with sympathy and speaking as if the cat would understand you, you sighed sadly.
As one would when seeing a cat, you moved your hand to pet its head, but just as you were about to touch it, it decided you were the enemy.
Hissing at you, you didn't even get to avoid it when it swiped it's paw at your hand.
It wasn't too deep, but it definitely left a mark and oh it also definitely hurt, burned as well.
You pulled your hand, seeing the scratch mark deep enough to draw blood and once again groaned in pain.
The swipe was right on your fingers, moving across from your index to your pinky.
And it was beginning to bleed fast.
"Wow so you definitely aren't fond of physical affection." Wincing in pain as now it began to burn even more, you moved behind, pushing the can with your uninjured hand.
"Fine fine I'll leave you be." You told it gently, noticing it had retreated behind.
You got up while pressing your palm to the scratched fingers, making sure it wouldn't just began bleeding badly out of nowhere.
Shit I probably don't even have a first aid kit.
Today could not get any worse.
And you probably jinxed that as you looked the wristwatch in your left hand for the time.
8:45 pm
A whole twenty minutes passed curfew.
Fuck, you were so screwed now.
You facepalmed yourself only to almost scream in pain as you accidentally hit the right side of your injured forehead.
Great I probably look like I got beat up.
You began walking as fast as you could, your bag seeming heavier as you'd stuff everything including your grocery into it.
Please please please let the advisor not be there right now for checking.
As you reached the gates, you sighed in relief seeing they were still open but slowed down to see if there were any guards around.
It felt like you were suddenly thrown into a secret mission, one to avoid getting caught and possibly getting a suspension for being out so late.
Your wound had stopped bleeding profusely when you'd pulled the sleeve of your sweater over it, engulfing your hand completely.
It pained you to ruin that sweater but you could just buy a new one, hopefully.
Hiding behind a streetlight that was a few meters away from the gatez you scanned your surroundings ahead.
You could almost hear the James Bond theme music playing in your head.
You didn't spot any guards around and the gate was open, so you did the one thing only a true spy could possibly dare to do.
Make a run for it.
Ducking your head down and using the sleeve of your sweater to cover your face, you ran as fast as you could inside, trying to make as minimal noise as you could.
That was not the case when the grovel beneath crunched as you made a run for it and you cussed at yourself internally, praying no one was around.
Lucky for you, your dorm was nearer to the entrance and you felt like bursting out in tears of joy when you neared the building.
Running up the steps, you paid no mind to anyone around you.
"Wait, is anyone still out?! It's almost nine come on guys!"
Eyes widening when you realized you made a grave mistake assuming no one was in the hallways, you turned the opposite direction of your room as footsteps began nearing.
Shit, I need to hide.
Being in this crisis was possibly the worst rotten cherry on top of your nightmarish sundae.
Suddenly, you registered this wasn't your hallway, heck you'd entered the wrong building in a moment of stupidity.
This was the boys dorm building when you noticed the familiar numbers.
Wait a minute.
Your eyes scanned for a number you'd seen countless times by now as you slowly but quickly moved ahead. The footsteps had gotten slow and you knew Alex was in the other hallway, probably looking for who was around.
Grinning when the familiar number was on the door, you didn't think much and just knocked harshly.
"Q! It's Y/N, I'll explain everything but please I'll get caught if you don't open right now!"
Whispering harshly into the door in a panicky tone, you knocked rapidly making sure it wasn't too loud.
You were sure your heart almost dropped out of your chest when you heard the footsteps approaching your direction again.
Your hand dropped to your side as you looked in the direction of Alex heading and you didn't even realize the door had already opened.
You almost yelped so loudly when you felt a tug on your arm pulling you inside. The grip on your arm was strong enough to just drag you inside and you closed your eyes out of fear.
You were pinned behind the door, your back pressing into it as a large hand covered your hand to prevent the yelp out of your mouth. The person's other hand was on your waist to prevent you from falling straight to the ground.
You listened closely to the footsteps and sighed in temporary relief when they passed the dorm.
Only now did you grimace in pain,the hand on your mouth unknowingly hurting the injuries on your face,you reached your hand to tug it out of your face.
The person immediately backed away the moment you grimaced, it was so quick as if they'd been burnt by you. You almost fell over as you'd lean your entire weight on them.
"What the actual fuck happened to you?"
A familiar voice asked in both astonishment and even a hint of anger.
Your eyes were still shut, collecting yourself before you opened them as you relaxed briefly.
You had to blink twice when you noticed who was in front of you.
"Oh…it's you." You murmured, looking anywhere else but at Minho the moment you perceived it was him the whole time.
He scanned your entire face, obviously noticing the blood as well as the bruise, as his eyes lowered, he also saw the blood on your sweater sleeve, your hand now free and the visible marks bleeding once again from being exposed to sudden movement.
When he first heard you, he'd been laying on the couch scrolling on his phone, bored because Q had chosen to spend the night at Florian's, having the place to himself for tonight.
He swore he felt his heart drop when he heard you panicking tone on the other side and didn't even care if it was the first time he'd seen in two weeks of nothing, he pulled you in and when he heard you almost yell, he just placed his palm to shut you up as he heard the footsteps pass by.
He didn't mean to scare you but at the moment, all he could really think about was who even or what even happened to you.
"Who did this to you?" His tone seemed aggressive as he questioned in a deeper voice than usual. Well usual was also deep but it was something you got used to.
You'd become frozen the moment he spoke, not knowing what to say, a little embarrassed at how you ended up in this situation. He stepped forward, straightening up instinctively in alarm.
His eyebrows furrowed in question as he pushed his tongue to the side, lowering his head to your level, now near eye level with you, your eyes following his every movement.
You tried not to flinch too harshly when he grazed his fingertips on your cheek and lip, where you'd gotten hurt as well as the place near you eye and eyebrow.
"Uh, so like you see, it looks worse than what actually happened so really it isn't too big of a deal—"
Stepping back a bit, he looked at you ridiculously
"Not too big of a deal ?!" He questioned as if daring you to say it again,
"You must be kidding me right now." He laughed humorlessly as he ran his hand through his hair and you tried not to stare like an idiot.
And as cliche as it could be getting, you felt light headed as you tried to keep your balance. Blinking harshly to keep your eyes open, you almost fell forward when you took a step but this time Minho was able to catch you in time.
"Hey, hey, don't faint on me right now okay? Let's just get you seated first."
You leaned your weight on him as he held you with one arm, he'd move beside you to make you comfortable as he slowly walked you to the couch. Before he laid you down, he removed your bag from your shoulders and put it aside, to make sure you'd be able to lay more properly.
You sighed in both relief and exhaustion when you finally sat down.
"Wait I'll be back."
He recalled the first aid kit he had in his drawer and went to get it as soon as he could.
You shut your eyes, tiredness overwhelming you, not only from the adrenaline high getting over but also from the mental exhaustion that'd you'd been having since the whole mess.
You opened your eyes when you felt a weight beside you, Minho sitting down with a first aid kit in his hand.
He opened it to remove a bottle of hydrogen peroxide that made you scrunch your nose a little in disgust at the color and some cotton pads, band-aids, and a roll of bandage.
You noticed they were hello kitty ones, the same ones you used and that thought made you smile even for a brief moment.
"You really got this ones too?" You asked softly and Minho turned to look at you, looking at the band aids in awe and snorted at your expression.
"You are here, almost on the verge of passing out but you are questioning whether I have the same hello kitty band aids you have? And to answer your question, yes."
"Gotta keep those priorities in check."
He rolled his eyes as he soaked the cotton pad with the hydrogen peroxide, the familiar deep brown color showing.
He gently took your hand and began to clean the wound.
Hissing loudly, you sat more straight about to pull away but he still kept the grip on your arm.
"It's okay, it'll hurt a bit, just hold on for a sec." Minho gently said to you as he focused on cleaning it, laying your hand on your lap and taking another cotton pad when the current one got used enough.
As much as you wanted to cuss out loud, you decided to put your focus elsewhere, choosing his face was the perfect place for that.
His eyes were as soft as his touch, you didn't think he'd be this gentle with you but here you were, him tending to your wounds, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration as his jaw was unknowingly clenched in the same focus.
"Sorry." You blurted out of nowhere, the guilt from everything piling up one by one, from the fact that you'd been ignoring him for two weeks only to show up after and him having to tend to your injuries when he could have just kicked you out.
He briefly made eye contact with you, wiping the now cleaner cuts with a dry cotton pad, and opening the kit again to remove a tube of antibiotic ointment.
The coolness of the ointment made you almost breath out of relief but you were still tense because Minho hadn't said anything yet.
"I get that you must be…angry with me. It's reasonable but I have my own reasons, I think they are pretty valid if you want to hear them out?" 
You finished, your throat closing up afterwards and you felt like you'd pass out from how fast your heart began beating.
"How did you get injured like this? First, tell me that." He finally spoke, wrapping a sterile white bandage around your fingers after the ointment.
He carefully finished wrapping and tied a knot, making sure it wasn't too tight as he looked at you questionably, to which you shook your head.
"It's stupid. Really." 
"I know you're stupid but—"
"I fell." You let the cat out of the bag and diverted your gaze, his movements pausing to process your words as if he heard wrong.
"Don't lie to me. Did someone bully you and beat you up—"
"I was coming to the dorms from my "study" session at the cafe that's like twenty minutes away from here, when I went to the grocery store for…stuff. And after I got what I needed, I was heading here and I was uh…preoccupied with something that I didn't see what was infront of me, so I stepped on it and then I tripped on my own feet and next thing I know my face was kissing the ground, then when—"
"You're telling me this was all because of your clu—"
"LET ME FINISH!" 
Minho shut up after that and pressed his lips into a thin line while you continued,
"As I was saying, I couldn't see what it was and it already hid in the dark when I flashed my phone's light, I saw it was a cat and then I felt bad for stepping on its tail, I went back and got some tuna for it at the store, I gave it to her but I think she was still upset so when I went to pet her, she scratched my fingers, which is why my hand is also injured."
"And oh, I ended up here by accident because I entered your dorm building while I was making a run for it and realized it too late, I didn't want to get caught so I thought of just asking whether I could hide in your dorm until the advisors stopped their rounds."
You breathed out heavily, your chest hurting from the lack of oxygen for saying all that in one go but you didn't want to embarrass yourself by thinking too much about it and just wanted to let it all out in go.
You moved your gaze back to Minho's when you noticed how quiet he'd gotten afterwards, having been looking somewhere else when telling how you got in this situation.
Narrowing your eyes at him suspiciously, he averted his gaze elsewhere while you scanned his expression.
"You can laugh if you want to." Sighing you finally said and that seemed to work as Minho laughed at you.
You deadpanned him as he spoke in between his laughing "You are really the biggest klutz I have known, I mean all this all because of a cat?!"
Rolling your eyes, you lightly frowned and Minho noticing this, began calming down,
"Okay, Okay I won't laugh, I'm sorry." He breathed out as he cleared his throat and looked at you, biting his bottom lip to stop the giggles as he saw your expressions.
"Are we done here? I have to go back to my room too—"
"I haven't even treated your face yet!" 
Now it was your turn to shut up and you slightly pouted at his scolding tone, 
"As hilarious as your little story is…you need to be more careful. Like this is kinda crazy to get hurt like this by just falling."
"Okay, mum got it." You mocked him and he glared at you, pressing the soaked cotton pad onto your cheek out of nowhere.
"YOU BITCH! WARN SOMEONE NEXT TIME—"
"You should have already known—"
"You KNOW WHAT FUCK YO—"
He ignored you as he continued to clean up your wound, your words being replaced with quite literally having to bite your tongue to control the hisses of pain.
"Now, now please shut up and stay still." 
You wanted to cuss at him again, claiming this was abuse but the look on his face challenged you to dare to pipe up again.
Instead, you just sighed in exhaustion, letting him finish his unnecessary kind act that was again questionable if it were out of his supposed kindness or convenience.
"Now there, all done." He placed the final hello kitty band-aid on your lip corner gently and you wished you could smile but that felt like a terrible idea as you remembered that even lifting up the corner of your right side made a sharp pain shoot up your lip.
"Thank you…I guess." You murmured softly to which a smug smile formed on his face, 
"I didn't hear you, could you please repeat that for me?" He pretended to be in thought of what you said when he clearly heard you due to your proximity.
You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms and swallowing down the bitter taste on your tongue, having to put your ego down a little at this point.
"I said." 
"Thank you for this. Thank you for…helping me. Even when you didn't need to." 
Even if you couldn't see it because you'd been looking elsewhere but him, he had a tiny smile on his face as he watched you.
"Anytime clumsy idiot, if it weren't me to handle your clumsy ass, then who?" 
It was probably meant as a joke, maybe a taunt even but your heart took it in a different way as you felt the familiar butterflies flutter.
"Minho seriously stop it, you shouldn't just say things like that." 
He'd begun winding up the first aid kit and the extra stuff that was there, when he heard you say that under your breath, which made him stop his task.
"Things like what?" He faced you now, his body in your direction as you froze up.
"Oh you know what I mean…stuff that can be taken into….a different context by…people." You awkwardly said, trying to dodge your way out of what you actually meant.
"Do enlightenment me, you know about the context of this." He leaned in closer to you, a smirk forming on his face and you frowned, gulping thinking of what to say next.
"Uhm…well." Biting your lip in thought, the floor seemed like a better place to focus at.
Minho's eyes softened at that, deciding he'd rather not tease you more.
"You know, I still don't get why you have been ignoring me for two weeks. Actually, everyone for two weeks." He blurted out what he really wanted to ask since he'd been able to talk to you properly after this long.
"At first, I thought that maybe you were busy but after the first 4-5 days, I figured you'd been purposefully avoiding me." He said as he looked down and you could feel the guilt creeping up all over again.
"Look. What is something I did?" He asked you with a tone of regret looking at you to see if your expression would reveal anything and as you held eye contact, what made you snap was the sincerity in them.
"No! No, it's not you…well, it is about you but not because of you? It's me though! I am the problem here." Staring at him got too much so you just decided to stand up and avoid looking at him when you spoke. The proximity was also getting to your head and the musky yet expensive smell he wore was suddenly so strong it made you dizzy.
You began racing back and forth in that small space, as you thought of how to explain and you didn't even grasp you'd been rambling the whole time, your hands moving in gestures as actions to your words.
"I sort of just noticed something about me and it got a lot since I never really felt like that way and it's crazy because it is also unexpected—"
Minho stood up and stood in front of you, holding you by your shoulders, genuine concern on his face when he scanned your distressed look.
"Okay calm down, if you don't feel comfortable explaining anything right now, you can just rest and you can tell when you do feel like it."
"No."
He raised an eyebrow at your answer and you continued,
"I think… I want to say it." 
He dropped his hands from your shoulders, letting them rest by his sides as you looked into his eyes.
For that moment, you just now perceived how close you were to him, taking in how handsome he truly was, you never admitted it but it was very obvious.
Your eyes momentarily paused on his lips, maybe looking at them for longer than one should and before you could trail your gaze lower to the dip of his throat in his hoodie, you paused at his Adam's apple that bobbed up and down as he swallowed.
Even though he'd been the one who got close to you like this, Minho still felt a little nervous when you looked up at him like the way you were right now.
"Turn around." You ordered before you could even think about it and confusion flooded his face.
"I won't be able to say it while looking at you so please."
Pausing for a brief second, he turned on his heel now facing the greenish bluish wall.
"You know if you want to confess to a murder, you don't need to be afraid, I'll help you hide—"
"I think I'm in love with you." You exclaimed, ignoring his words as you stared at the back of his head.
He was not that taller than you, just by a few inches or so but it was just the right height.
Immediately, you noticed him shut up and tense up as his shoulders straightened.
"I personally never thought it'd be you out of all people but fuck, it's not like your heart lets you decide who you should fall in love with." You tugged at the uninjured hand's sleeve while you used your other to brush your hair behind your ear.
"As cheesy as that sounds. I don't know when it happened or how it happened but I do know when I knew. It was when you bought food for me when I was upset and it was everything I liked. Or maybe it was when despite being cold yourself, you'd offered me your sweater and gosh you just know how to pull at one's strings don't you?"
"I'll admit though, I was annoyed by you and your…attitude and I still will be but it's just that, crazily enough I think that's just one of the reasons I fell for you."
"You're many things Minho, stupid, annoying as fuck, bitchy at times as well, but you're also sweet and caring when you want to be. And now I am just rambling at this point so I'll just shut up."
You pressed your lips into a thin line, the ground a great place to put your attention, your cheeks warming up and you swore you felt like you'd faint then and there.
It was like the atmosphere took a change after your confession and momentary rant. A lingering silence that felt loud and you really didn't know what to think.
Can I die at this moment right now? Dropping dead sounds so tempting.
"..."
"...can I uh…turn around now? To you know…talk?" He asked, scratching the back of his neck nervously your eyes snapped to him, widening when you recalled that he was still facing the wall.
Groaning at the fact that you forgot he was not facing you, you coughed out awkwardly,
"Yeah! Of course…you can."
You held your breath as you waited for him to turn around, and when he did, you couldn’t even look at him.
Minho honestly didn’t know what to think, say or do.
Because what can you say after the person you’ve been pining over since the past few months suddenly confessed their apparently reciprocated love to you?
He thought he’d been doing a decent job hiding his feelings so he doesn’t need to face the brutal rejection fear we all get when we have a crush on our supposed ‘enemy’. But it got harder for him as time went by, and soon enough he found himself completely head over heels for you.
Taking his obvious silence as your answer, your heart grew heavier at the lack of response and you spoke up, breaking the blanket of quietness.
“I suppose you don’t feel the same way so I should probably just go anyways it’s getting late, just…forget I said anything-”
You began to slowly take a few steps back, making sure you wouldn’t fall and injure yourself again,
Minho’s head sharply turned towards you as his eyes widened in alarm, “Wait! You didn’t even let me say anything!”
Pausing in your steps before you could swiftly turn for the door and exit as quick as you could, now a sheepish look on your face as you saw his slightly annoyed and alarmed look.
“Well, I just assumed your silence was an answer?”
He crossed his arms now a few feet away from you as he was already making his way towards you.
“There you go again with you and your assumptions! You really should let someone speak at least.” He sighed rubbing the gap between his brows with his index finger.
He moved closer to you, now only an arm's length away from you, “Look at me, please?”
You had to raise your head a little to look him in the eyes and you felt like you could get lost in them, one hand was on your side, clenched in a fist out of nervousness.
“Who said I didn’t feel the same?” He asked so casually as if asking for your name and you could only gape at him at the implications.
“Because I definitely know that,” He gulped as he looked down at you, feeling like his heart might just jump out of his chest at what he was about to say.
“I am in love with you, maybe a little or by a whole lot. A whole lot I swear I can feel my heart jump just at your presence. I didn’t say anything because honestly, I thought this was another dream I was having, I had to pinch myself to make sure. But I do feel the same, possibly more than you ever will.” 
Your jaw might as well have been on the floor at his unexpected confession, frankly, yours was also something you didn’t think you were going to say, but you said it because you couldn’t keep it in you anymore.
“Hold on, what do you mean by another dream?” You narrowed your eyes at him suspiciously, deciding to mess around with him but in reality, you were soaring and your heart probably long leaped out of you in pure euphoria.
“Out of all that, you picked up on only that?!? Did you just- just completely dismiss the fact that I am in love with you as well?!”
Giggling at his expression, you couldn’t contain your happiness as he fell for your joke and once he realised that he glared at you half-heartedly,
“You think you’re so funny huh? Do you even know how hard it was for me to say that? I almost fainted for fucks sake!”
You laughed even more at that, having to hold your stomach with one hand as you leaned forward and at the sound of your laughter, his own smile he’d been trying to control showed as he rolled his eyes at you, shaking his head.
“You seriously know how to make a guy have a heart attack.” 
At this, you looked up at him stepping even closer as you bopped his nose,
“But you literally just confessed to being in love with me and you can’t take back what you said now.”
A comical squeak arose from you as he wrapped his arms around your waist out of nowhere pulling you closer, gently moving your injured hand on his shoulder to make sure you didn’t get hurt and you moved your other one around his neck.
It wasn’t like he’d never touched you, but still, the spark of electricity shooting through your entire body didn’t change one bit and it felt the same for him as the warmth radiating from you seemed to engulf him as well.
Staring at him, your eyes trailed to his lips and you moved closer, wanting to just,
Before you could even close the distance, you felt a finger on your lips and heard him whisper to you,
“No, no, you can’t kiss me right now, as much as I want to, you first need to let this heal.” He tenderly poked the right corner of your lip where you’d forgotten you were hurt at the moment.
Pouting slightly at that, Minho chuckled and before you could whine, he swiftly leaned forward and pecked your lips, lingering for a second before pulling back,
“That’s all you get, for now.” Sighing you just nodded, knowing it was for the best.
“You know you still have to make up to me for ignoring me for two weeks, I mean not only me but I’m sure Kitty’s ready to kick your ass as well, I heard she was planning to threaten to burn  your giraffe socks if you didn’t talk to her.”
Suddenly a realisation hit you when you remembered something,
“IS THAT WHY I CAN’T FIND THEM SINCE THE PAST TWO DAYS?!?”
“...I suppose she’s already executed her plan.”
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writingmeraki Ⓒ 2023
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