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howdy-is-canon · 1 month

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ok SO…………… imagine a world where howard and andy met while howard and carolyn were still together.

we have to think about the stage of howard's life that he was in at this time: he does NOT know that he's aro OR ace, so, uh, this changes a lot already because beforehand, he had already split up with carolyn, and had realised he was aroace, prior to meeting andy, which is why he ends up helping andy to realise his identity also. this doesn't necessarily need to change cuz howard can still realise hes aroace, break up with carolyn, and thru discussions and coming to terms with it himself, this would still help andy to come to the same conclusion about himself. i do think it's harder for andy to figure it out for himself considering he's not been in a relationship as such, ever, so it's one of those, “maybe i haven't found the right person” or “maybe i just need to experience it to understand” things…

anyway let us consider the DYNAMICS here because…. much to consider here… it does resemble a sort of love triangle, if we're gonna be typical and romantic, but i feel this situation is neither of those things, so, lol. this is a dude in a relationship with a friend he's never been attracted to out of a feeling of obligation, realising he's a whole other orientation, ending it, and simultaneously building a friendship with someone else, and over a course of months to years coming to realise the kind of relationship that would work for him that happens to be with this guy. not like, sorry carolyn, i met someone else. lol. it would have ended regardless.

so anyway… probably howard DOES tell carolyn like, oh i trained up someone new today, he's called andrew, he seems nice but terrified. carolyn probably jokes about howard being the one to scare him, on account of his :| vibes, and howard admits he wasn't thrilled to have to train someone and it may have come across at first but he decided he likes this guy and hopes he didnt make him feel bad……… 🥺

so two things are happening here: howard and andy are building a friendship, goofing around, laughing about carrot pants; and howard and carolyn are. i dunno. not doing that. i think they've been getting on fine but everything kind of immediately changed when they went from friends to “dating” and he felt pressure to be a certain kind of person to her now, what is a boyfriend, what do boyfriends do, am i being affectionate enough, etc. which he kind of blamed on Society or something at first before he realised most people WANT to do those things and aren't secretly lamenting them. and, gasp, that's why they form romantic relationships.

AND. okay this feels bad. but when i was with tom i never mentioned him to people. my family obviously knew and i did sometimes talk about him, but not much, and mostly for functional purposes lol. i remember i was working at pearson the year i met louie when me and tom broke up, and i remember telling tom about louie, but i couldnt bring myself to say the word “boyfriend” out loud so i never mentioned tom to louie LOL uhh……. i can see howard just never really bringing up that he has a girlfriend until they break up. tbh. and probably he's acting spaced out at work after it happens, and andy's like, hey what's up. and howard is like umm. it's hard to explain.

and he's probably like. idk if they talk about it AT work, maybe andy asks howard at lunch or, when they're just standing around at some point lol. somewhere a little more private ya know, in the back. i know how supermarkets work……… and howard's like ok so…… i was kind of… in a relationship… i know it's probably weird that i didnt mention it before now, but it's because, umm. okay, this is gonna sound crazy, (it's fine, says andy) but, ok, we were friends in school, right, and i don't really know why that changed, because i don't think i ever actually saw her as anything else, but, i mean it was her that… expressed an interest… and i guess i just went along with it ‘cause that's how it goes, or so i thought, and it's a bit stupid really ‘cause we were actually really good friends until then. and like, i don't know if we will be again. now. ‘cause, fair enough, she didn’t take it very well.

andy: what did you tell her…?

howard: dunno, i just fuckin’, uh, had a mental breakdown or something and she kind of got the picture. (he’s kind of laughing at himself in a bemused way lol) … and then she asked me if i was gay. and i'm like, i don't fuckin’ know. i don't think i'm anything.

andy: that seems a weird thing to ask.

howard: well, okay. don't think anything of this, but, i don't make friends very often, so the fact i've brought you up a handful of times in conversation is apparently a good reason to think i've been secretly gay this whole time. which if i am, then it's a secret to me an’ all.

andy: wait, did i come up in your break-up conversation with your girlfriend?

howard: look, it's her that brought it up. (he kinda shrugs and holds his hands up here)

andy: no, it's fine, just… (i think andy is trying not to laugh here. very serious conversation.) it feels a bit like i'm part of a love triangle or something.

howard: yeah, ya homewrecker. it's all your fault.

andy: i will not be held responsible for this!

howard: nah. it would've ended anyway.

andy: you're still making it sound like i had anything to do with this.

howard laughs at this. an exasperated little chuckle. i was going to say he runs a hand through his hair but this is, in fact, buzzcut era howard we're talking about. probably he just rubs his fuzzy head a bit lol.

howard: no, i know.

andy: are you doing okay, though?

howard: yeah… it's all good. thanks. sorry to bring you into it.

andy: don't be! i asked.

howard: yeah, but, just the stuff carolyn said about you.

andy: well that was her, not you. but i'd rather know about it than not.

howard: okay. fair.

i guess it trails off after this. but more conversations will be had i am sure. andy would check in with howard the next time they see each other. at some point there would be a conversation about howard's guilt over not being what carolyn wanted, and he felt “like a right dickhead” for pulling the whole it's not you it's me, thing, but it literally IS him and not her, it's what HE lacks. and andy says something about how howard doesnt owe anyone feelings he simply does not have and it's kind of absurd to think otherwise.

as for how howard and carolyn's relationship is faring at this point — probably they've occasionally messaged each other and intended to stay friends. after the initial upset i think she does say she just had to process it and it's not his fault he feels like he does, but she doesn't understand why he ever thought it was a good idea to start going out if he never felt that way about her. he's been unpacking this himself before this conversation. he says he just liked her, and cared about her, and he thought that's what that was, and had nothing else to compare it to. he says, he doesn't want her to think he didn't care about her just because it wasn't in the right way. he's probably getting a little bit upset, a little bit agitated at this point. at the way he is. at how it just could never have worked, and it's his fault.

i actually don't know at what point the words aromantic or asexual first come up. i've had it that howard was the first one to adopt these labels, although he's less of a googler than andy, but it makes sense because stan's his brother and he's up to date on all the lingo and his friend rees is aroace don't you know. and howard does talk to stan about things. perhaps in more detail than with andy at this point since they hadn't really known each other for that long yet.

i think i still like it how it was; howard figures it out, tells andy at some point, bla bla bla, time passes. thoughts are percolating in andy's brain. months go by, he's started university, he's feeling how different he is to everyone (it's the autism, baby! get ready!), there's that thing about that guy who tries to flirt with him and he tells him he's already taken cuz he doesn't want to straight up reject the guy, and maybe a little bit for clout (he thinks, okay, well i have no friends here but at least they will know that i have someone outside of this place!)... and howard does come over a few times, and he is assumed to be the boyfriend, and i dont know yet how andy ends up explaining this one, but i think howard has a grand old time pretending to be andy's boyfriend lol.

perhaps……… in classic sitcom fashion…… this leads to howard playing the part, putting an arm around andy, messing up his hair, giving him a widdle kiss on his widdle head 👉👈 and this is how they kind of get used to these casual touches. and maybe, just maybe, andy is SO touch-starved, and howard is kind of lamenting how these kinds of interactions seem to be exclusive content reserved only for those in romantic relationships. and maybe they talk about it a little bit. maybe they shyly admit to each other how they think it feels kinda nice. and maybe andy clarifies he's never felt any romantic feelings for anyone either, he is pretty sure, just in case howard was worried about that. and maybe the fake-dating scenario is actually the catalyst for all of Howdy. imagine that. wwooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaauuuuhkghg dying noises

also not sure how carolyn sits within all of this. i'm sure her and howard are talking a lot less, but still talking. probably they meet up now and again, as before. it seems okay, but howard probably actually finds it really hard to bring up andy, because! now i see the drama. if she realises howard and andy end up in some kind of a committed relationship, regardless of whether it's romantic or platonic or whatever the hell, i feel she may lose her mind lol. she’d probably be retrospectively filling in the blanks of what led to her and howard's ultimate demise, even though as i said, it really did not have anything to do with andy and would’ve always happened. but she would blame it on andy and think howard a liar. i imagine it could turn into a bit of a fight. she's calling him a liar and saying she felt bad for him and all this time it WAS because he met someone else. and howard is riled by this and asks WHY she felt bad for him, is it because he can't feel romantic love? does that make him worthless? is that the only thing that makes a person worth anything?

(insert moses sumney “doomed” lyrics because im still insane about that song: if lovelessness is godlessness, will you cast me to the wayside? well i feel the peeling of half-painted ceilings reveal the covering of a blank sky)

(in fact another moses sumney lyric, from “don't bother calling”, which kind of encapsulates howard's guilt around not being enough for carolyn: i don't know what we are, but all i know is i can't go away with you with half a heart)

(i need a separate document just for moses sumney lyrics. but like. howard before he finds his little situation with andy mood, from “me in 20 years”: i'm left wondering if it's written on my urn that i'd burn alone like a star

(btw this is not howard's kind of music but i think andy would like it and i think it would absolutely murder him lyrically, and then he would show it to howard and it would murder howard as well. lol. anyway literally not relevant right now.)

umm… so maybe this is the bitter end of howard's friendship with carolyn, probably not, but at least it can never be how it was again. there is the potential for carolyn to learn and understand, but i don't know if this happens while they are friends. as i say, once howard unpacks some trauma, i think that carolyn not Getting It is not the biggest issue anymore. i think seeing her after this point would literally send him into some kind of a panic attack honestly.

we know that at some point howard and andy decide to explore some intimate acts LOL i’m such a prude just say sex. but not really tho. they don't get very far. anyway i don't know if this is the trigger for the delayed-onset ptsd or no. i mean, probably? which means that howard and carolyn could have been friends still for several years until he simply has to cut ties with her. but perhaps it's been tapering off anyway. he's probably been feeling kind of weird about it for a long time and probably somewhere deep in the bowels of his mind he has known that he’s only been continuing their friendship to compensate for how he couldn't be the thing that she wanted, and he thinks he at least owes it to her to be a good friend. he's just like me fr.

and then… and then… i think that’s enough for now

#howdy #howard #andy #carolyn

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ros-aline · 2 months

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I’m actually feeling so sad right now and I guess I’m trying not to be mean to myself but it’s really hard :( part of me feels so stupid for liking this guy and being upset but part of me IS upset and it feels shitty that I was playing a game with him and his maybe gf? this girl is super nice and we even played together without him but when he joined I realized after awhile they were in a call with each other and I wasn’t like we only talked thru the game vc and that just fucked me up and I feel bad for feeling so upset but I think I find myself in this situation a lot where I feel not good enough or belittled or whatever and like all I imagine is them talking and me sitting by myself silently and like if that isn’t what I feel like my whole life is then idk. it really sucks because I feel sort of close to him but I know it doesn’t compare to him and this girl and it just hurts that he would start and pursue something with me for a few weeks while w this girl and granted he did tell me about her but was not and has not been clear about his intentions anyways it reminds me of highschool and seeing a picture of the guy I liked and a girl hanging out and it just sent me into this crazy spiral like couldn’t breathe feelings, or when my ex told me he only dated me to get over his ex and it didn’t work and he didn’t actually love me or when I found out 6 months later that my ex had kissed some girl at a party or when the girl o was with was also hooking up with my best friend behind my back (double betrayal) or when my other ex would constantly talk about other girls he likes or is pursuing and my OTHER ex lying to me for 7 months and the guy who had a gf the whole time we were essentially also dating and then told me he was talking to me less bc him and his gf were doing better (so he didn’t need me anymore!) also my dad and never being good enough for him and being laughed at god that fucking sucked I’m so tired of feeling kicked to the curb it just hurts so bad. I feel like a fucking add-on to peoples life to just pop up and make them feel better or whatever but kill myself in the process and don’t get anything in return! and that actually feels natural and easy for me!!! It’s easy to sacrifice myself to be loved by others!!! AHHH!!!

#I’ve also been chain smoking weed and haven’t eaten enough #I know this will pass #but part of me is just devastated that there’s all this trauma #and I have to face it and think about it #the pain of not being enough #while also somehow finding people who treat me like shit #and sticking around! I do this willingly!!#like that’s ALSO fucked up like I will keep talking to this guy probably #tbf it def feels different now but still #I know I need to go to sleep #I should’ve just gone to bed hours ago #d

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spaceorphan18 · 2 years

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What are your headcanons about Klaine between episodes 6.08 and 6.13? Do you think they were renting a flat in Lima, or were living with Carole and Burt or Pam?

Ha.

I mean - man does this show love to play fast and loose with living arrangements. I wanna know where Santana slept while she was at the loft ;)

Yeah - so, that time period is such a weird thing.

Okay, so there are a lot of different variables here, so this is my thinking on the subject.

First of all, addressing Kurt's living situation before coming back to Lima. There's no way he could afford to stay in the loft by himself - I'm assuming he and Rachel had a year lease, and she probably continued to have it paid for until the lease runs out. When Kurt and Blaine decided to live together - it was probably assumed that Blaine would have some sort of income to help pay for it. (I have no idea how Kurt was getting a grand a month unless he has some huge student loans, but I'm ignoring that for the time being.) When they brake up, Kurt has to do something cause he can't stay in the loft.

He has a few options - move in with a friend (namely Elliott), move into Nyada dorms, or find a stranger to move in with him. Honestly, a one bedroom apt in NYC, on the cheap side, is around $2000-$4000 a month - there's no way Kurt's living on his own. My guess is that he moved in with Elliott - but it's really up to your own prerogative on that one.

The other thing is - what happens to all his stuff after he comes back to Lima?? Well, again, he could leave it at his new place (with Elliott in my own headcanon) or put it in storage while he looks for a new place. I don't think that he dragged it all home, as that would have been rather pricy, too. My guess is storage - but I mean, again, there's not a solid option.

Anyway - so, Kurt comes back home, he lives with his dad. And - he only plans on being there for a single semester, since that's how long his work study program lasts. (Which... don't get me started on how ridiculous nyada is.)

Meanwhile... Blaine! Moved in with Karofsky in late Sept/Early Oct in some small apartment in Lima. Do they have a six month lease? A year lease? Month by month? My guess is six months, tbh. It's a commitment, but not too much of a commitment.

In Nov. Karofsky moves out (as seen by all the boxes in the apt), and Klaine gets married. Where do we go from here??

We know that Sectionals (6x11 -We Built This Glee Club) is in December, so Kurt and Blaine are in Lima for at least another month.

And then... ?? The problem is that Dreams Come True isn't very clear. Not only is the editing confusing in that episode, even reading the script, it's not fully clear the time line on anything. So, there's not a whole lot of text to pull from. Blaine mentions to Sam that they have a nice place in NYC and that they see everyone in the city -- but there's also a thematic thru line of Klaine going back to NYC for good.

So, did they go back in January? Or stay through the spring when Nationals is held?

There are a lot of different angles on this one, so here's mine...

Kurt and Blaine get married in November - and then immediately head out for their honeymoon. I do think that they're smart enough - even through their happy blissful time in - wherever Sue sent them for a week - they do figure out the living situation.

Blaine keeps the apartment in Lima, and Kurt stays there, but doesn't exactly live there. Kurt's stuff stays split between his dad's home and his NYC storage place (or with Elliott). He does, though, spend his nights with Blaine in the Lima apartment (even if it is all rainbow colored, and a little weird that Blaine had just been living with another guy.)

They stay that way through the holidays. In January, though, there are plenty of different options - but I'm kind of coming up with an interesting one on the spot...

In January, Kurt has to go back to New York -- he stays with Elliott, but starts looking for apartments for he and Blaine to share. Blaine, however, takes the semester off -- as he can start NYU in the fall. This gives him some time to wrap up things in Lima, and see out the six month lease on the Lima apartment which would be up in April.

I know that the two of them living apart when they're first married seems a little odd -- but I think it might actually be good for the new reconciliation and marriage. Instead of jumping into things without talking them through - they make the decision not to throw themselves into a less than ideal situation as they had when Blaine first move into the loft.

The space and time apart gives them time to find a small place that they can afford (between Kurt's loans and Blaine's parents' money), and one that they could feasibly keep once they need to look for jobs once out of college. The distance works - as Kurt doesn't feel too suffocated by the relationship, and the fact that they're married makes Blaine feel secure in it. They've learned from their mistakes and are able to talk through what they want their future to be instead of trying to play it out as it goes along.

Anyway, come April - Blaine moves back to NYC for good, but they do spend time in Lima around Nationals as well as going back for Mr. Schue's back to school stuff in late August. But when Blaine starts school in the fall - they're officially moved out of Lima for good.

And that's my headcanon!! I came up with most of that this evening, and I'm totally working it into a fic - I really like the idea of Kurt and Blaine spending time apart at the beginning of their marriage. Thanks Nonny for the inspiration!! :D

#that's how s.o. sees it #klaine #interesting question!

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retrievablememories · 4 years

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the second time around | jaehyun

title: the second time around pairing: jaehyun x reader genre: fluff, some angst request: “Hi! Here’s a suggestion for a story or add-on to another story you wrote. I really liked moonlight w/ jaehyun! Could you do a follow up with him not seeing her for awhile and him (and her secretly) being pissed about it but wants to reconnect with her but outside of being a customer. Ty and keep up the good work with your writing.” word count: 2.9k warnings: a couple mentions of sex a/n: hmm...the sequel to moonlight...sequels are scary to write but here we are lol. this could’ve been posted last sunday really but i’ve been stalling oof

Despite getting Jaehyun’s number after that night at the strip club, you’ve seen and heard a lot less of him than you’d like. On his end, Jaehyun isn’t so pleased about losing touch either, but you wouldn’t know that with the lack of communication.

Both of you are ultimately busy with your own lives, and it’s not like he can just drop in whenever he wants to visit you. Not just because he’s busy, but also because of where you work. The men keep their visits to the club on a once-a-month basis for a reason—to avoid tipping off any stalkers who’d find out and leak their whereabouts.

You’ve texted each other a few times since your first meeting, and you enjoyed the conversations you got to have within that timespan, but the time between responses kept getting longer—on both of your ends—until things eventually dropped off.

You were unhappy about this, though you tried not to be so obvious about it to the other girls. Getting attached to customers was not a good look. Even if they were handsome and nice and had good dick.

However, Anya was the first to notice your slightly sour mood despite your best efforts to project an unphased demeanor. And, being her usual nosy self, she managed to pry it out of you before you could even think about denying it.

“Don’t stress about it,” she’d told you on the night you finally spilled the beans. She’d wrapped her arms around your shoulders and tipped your chin up, making you hold your head up higher and look at yourself in the mirror reflection facing you. “There will be many more men where he came from. And if you don’t wanna deal with any more men right now, that’s fine too. He doesn’t know what he’s missing out on, anyway.”

“I’m not stressing over it,” you’d argued, sighing. “We don’t stress over men who aren’t boyfriends, remember?”

Anya grinned then, though you could tell it was the kind of smile you give when a friend is doing something they shouldn’t be—or indulging in something they think is good for them when it’s not. “Duh. But you might wanna start following your own advice if you’re gonna be dishing it out!” And then she’d gone off to do her own thing, probably to finish getting ready for her set later that night or to go bother one of her favorite bartenders.

You’d looked at yourself in the mirror more closely, frowning at the truthfulness of her statement and wishing you had not been quite so easy to read. You’d had a show right after that, which allowed you to take your mind off the mess for at least a few hours. But in the small moments when you weren’t thinking about work or school or anything else you had to do, Jaehyun crept back into your mind like a specter, wanting you to acknowledge him even though you weren’t getting the same.

When you head out to the parking lot after a particularly long night, you slow your steps when you see a man leaning against his car, his cap pulled over his eyes and his head low. In any other scenario, you probably would’ve alerted one of the bouncers, thinking he was some creep waiting until after your stage to try to corner you in a shady area. However, you hold off on calling anybody because you can clearly recognize him even if he thinks he’s being inconspicuous—it’s Jaehyun.

He lifts his head when he hears your shoes on the ground, and his lips turn up into something of a smile.

“If you wanted another dance, you’re a bit late. We just closed,” you say jokingly, raising an eyebrow at him. Jaehyun shakes his head.

“Tempting idea, but that’s not what I came here for.” He turns to face you fully now, observing you in your casual, after-work clothes. In the back of your mind, you realize this is the first time he’s seen you outside the context of performing. Then he sighs. “It feels like it’s been forever since I’ve seen you.”

“I know.” Your familiar irritation rises again. Sure, maybe him coming to see you or you going to see him more often isn’t feasible. A text or a call, though...would be decidedly less effort, and not difficult to do. You’re not sure whether to be more irritated with him or yourself about not trying to reach out again, though you decide to aim your annoyance at him just because you can.

Jaehyun nods to your agreement. “How have you been?”

“I’ve been fine,” you say. “Work is...work. It has its ups and downs. How are you? Busy with the idol life?”

Jaehyun sighs. “Yeah...it just gets…stressful sometimes.” He bites his lip and shakes his head, seeming bothered about whatever’s going on with his job but not wanting to say much more about it.

“I’m sure,” you respond, and you don’t really know what to say afterwards. It’s been a while since either of you talked, and it’s strangely hard to try to pick up where you left off as if nothing happened. Jaehyun realizes this, too, and appears distressed at not knowing how to keep the conversation going with you—and possibly wasting your time.

You nod to yourself and shift on your feet. “Well, the Uber will probably be here soon, so—”

“I don’t know what things will look like between us, but I don’t want us to fall out of contact again,” Jaehyun blurts out, then winces. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt. I just...don’t want either of us to leave before we...sort this out, I guess.”

You think to yourself, wondering if this is really worth trying to pursue. You’ve yet to deal with a man with the level of fame that Jaehyun has, yet with such a strict image to keep, which makes things exponentially more complicated. But despite your apprehension, you still want to know where this could lead. After a moment, you say, “Well, if you’re willing...I’d like the same.”

Jaehyun nods and stands up a little straighter, like that response just gave him the energy he needed. “Do you wanna….go somewhere? Just to like, hang out.” His proposition is abrupt, and you didn’t expect it.

“Now?” You check your phone, and it’s 18 minutes past 2 a.m. There aren’t too many places that will still be open at this hour, other than establishments similar to your line of work, but you aren’t in the mood for any more of that tonight. Your driver, too, is only a few minutes away, but you already find yourself with your finger hovering over the Cancel button. “We could.”

Jaehyun goes around to the passenger side of the car and opens the door for you. You get into his car, noting its sleek interior. Once he gets in, he asks you what you want to hear, and you notice he’s looking through his Spotify. You shrug.

“I don’t know. Show me something you like,” you say. You cringe at sounding so disinterested, which makes you realize you might just be a little more upset about being ghosted than you thought you were. You almost want to curse at how this dude is taking you off your usual game. “I mean, I like hearing new music anyway, so…”

Jaehyun starts the car and grins slightly. “Alright, then let me show you the best of the best…” You both end up listening and vibing to a playlist he’s made, which is good. Not that you didn’t expect it to be, but you end up liking most of the songs he shows you, which usually doesn’t happen with other people’s playlists.

Jaehyun ends up taking you to an ice cream place that’s still open this late, to your surprise. The sitting area inside the store is closed, though they’ve kept the drive-thru open for late-night travelers like yourselves who want a quick treat. You don’t question it, though; you definitely won’t pass up a chance for some ice cream.

You end up eating the ice cream while sitting in his car and listening to the rest of his playlist. Neither of you say much other than commenting on the songs or talking about your favorite ice cream flavors or making other non-committal small talk. You kind of prefer it this way, at least for the moment—just listening to the music and watching the headlights and taillights of cars that pass by.

You and Jaehyun ride around the city for a while longer after finishing the ice cream, not intending to go anywhere in particular but just coasting on the highways. It might be an excuse to keep listening to this new playlist he’s put on, or maybe more reason to pretend that awkward period between you never happened. Acknowledging it in a way, but not speaking any life into it.

Eventually, though, it has to arise back to the surface. Jaehyun taps his fingers against the steering wheel at a red light, like he’s impatient to get somewhere, and you wonder what he’s feeling until he comes out and says,

“I think it was...ultimately my fault for not contacting you more. Or not trying to stay in contact.”

The words hang in the air for a moment. “Well, I won’t argue with that,” you finally respond.

“It’s just hard to get close to anyone and be an idol at the same time. Sometimes I sabotage myself when I shouldn’t, and…” He trails off, though you don’t know whether he’s searching for the words or has decided to leave his sentence at that.

“You’d rather not be embarrassed by dating a stripper, or something along those lines?” Your tone is nonchalant, though you’re a little bothered by saying it. He wouldn’t be the first or the last person to feel some type of way about your job, though you’ve mostly gotten used to the judgment at this point.

Jaehyun seems a bit startled by the statement. “If you like doing it, then I don’t care what you do. You should live your life however you want to.”

“I see,” you say slowly. “Most men I meet outside of the club are not receptive to it, so you ain’t gotta lie if you feel some other way about it, seriously...”

“I’m serious,” he insists. “You told me that day that you liked it, and I believed you. I just think...we should all be able to do things we enjoy without worrying about what others think of it.”

Jaehyun turns to look at you for a moment, and his features are lit up by the street light as it turns green. His face, which is simultaneously painted with shadows and glowing with light, appears to be just as genuine as he sounds. Or maybe this late-night atmosphere just has you feeling more receptive and sentimental than usual. Then he broaches the next subject carefully, steering you back to where the conversation began. “You didn’t text me anymore, either.”

“I figured you’d moved on or something, maybe started talking to someone else…” you reply. “And, you know, if that was the case...so be it. There wouldn’t be a point to chasing someone who wasn’t interested anymore.”

“I am interested.” Jaehyun rushes the words out, like he’s eager to dispel the uncertainty before you get the wrong idea; not that that hasn’t already happened, but still. It isn’t too late to change your mind. “I want to like, know you as a person...not just while being a customer at the club, or something like that.”

You nod, looking at your hands and considering his words. “We can do that...yeah, we can.” Then you hold your hand out to him, a grin playing on your lips. “Nice to meet you, then. I’m Y/N.”

He smiles too, and takes your hand in one of his. “I’m Jaehyun.”

The conversation after that seems to reach a turning point, like somehow you’ve broken the ice and can finally talk to each other on a deeper level without worrying about the issue that’s been lingering over your heads all night. You think you could talk to him like this for hours if you wanted to, if there was enough time in the world for it.

Unfortunately, though, you don’t have as much time as you’d like, and once it starts edging on 4 AM, you both decide it’s probably best to call it a night. Jaehyun takes you back to your apartment after you tell him where it is.

He parks in front of the apartment complex, and you’re prepared to thank him for the night and get out, but he insists on walking you up to your apartment—something about it being too dangerous for women to walk alone at night.

“It’s not that far.” You laugh, but you aren’t going to argue about it if it means getting a few more moments with him.

Jaehyun follows you up the steps after you both get out of the car. You walk a little slower to prolong the moment, but eventually you have to get up to your apartment door. You also take your time with taking your keys out of your bag and putting them in the lock. And maybe you’re not as slick as you thought, because Jaehyun notices. He laughs quietly behind you, but the sound isn’t low enough to escape your hearing.

You turn around to look at him, your hand on the doorknob. “Well, I guess that’s it. Thanks for the ride...and for the ice cream, you know.”

He nods, and one of his dimples pokes out. “You didn’t have to entertain me tonight, but I’m glad you did...so, thanks.”

Both of you linger in your doorway for a few more moments. Jaehyun wants to come in, and you know it, but you also know he probably won’t say it because he technically shouldn’t. His members are expecting him back at the dorm. He doesn’t want to impose, and he didn’t even bring any extra clothes. But you know he wants to come in, and you want it, too.

You tilt your head to the side. “Would it be bad if I asked you to stay?” you say tentatively.

A slow smile spreads on his face. “No, it wouldn’t.”

You open the door wider so he can step inside and take his shoes off at the entrance. You lead him to your living room by the hand. “What do you wanna do?” you ask, looking at him imploringly. You want to be sure you’re both on the same page concerning your intentions.

“Whatever you wanna do,” he echoes, holding your hand a bit tighter. You expect to see lust or some similar desire in his expression and had already figured you might end up having sex again tonight, but his eyes expect nothing from you. He only smiles in the dim light of your apartment and waits for you to make the next move.

You laugh, and it comes out as an airy chuckle. “Well, then...I want to lay down. It’s been a long day.” From your tone, Jaehyun understands that you really just want to lie down and not think about much of anything else right now. He follows you when you lead him into your bedroom and sits patiently on your bed while you go to the bathroom to change into your night clothes. You’re thankful you already took a shower at the club, because you’re not sure you’d have the energy to do all that now.

He’s taken his jeans off when you come back into the room, though he still keeps his shirt on. You get onto the bed and lean over him, hooking your finger into the collar of his shirt, and he looks up at you. “You can take this off if you want, I don’t care.”

“Is this you saying you want to see me shirtless?” He grins, though he readily takes the invitation and pulls his shirt off, placing it to the side along with his pants.

You shake your head good-naturedly, a smile on your face. “I promise it’s innocent…but the view never hurts.”

You peel the sheets back and you both climb underneath them, lying across from each other and looking at each other like you want to say something more but aren’t sure what. There isn’t much light in the room except for the street lights coming from your bedroom window, muted slightly by the blinds.

Jaehyun laughs suddenly, breaking the silence, and you do the same. You’re not sure why either of you are laughing, but you do so anyway, simply enjoying the moment for what it is. After your laughter dies down, he takes your hand from where it’s resting on the pillow and slips his pinky around yours. “I’ll try not to lose you this time.”

You lean a little closer to his face so you can plant a kiss on his lips—just a short and soft touch. He tastes like ice cream, and somehow you know there will be many more kisses like this in the future. “You better not.”

173 notes · View notes

mooniefics · 4 years

Text

in the grand scheme of things [ 2 ]

pairings : zeke jaeger / reader, referenced eren / reader

word count : 6.2k

tags : unhealthy relationships, relationship discussions, implied cheating, drinking, break ups, eventual smut, praise kink, mutual infidelity, dubious morality, love triangles

warnings : contains nsfw, rlly toxic behavior

summary : you and eren hadn't been doing the best these past few months, and no one that you knew seemed to have any answers for you, or pointers in the right direction. who better to offer you some sound, insightful relationship advice than his older brother. or so you thought.

— originally posted 1 / 25 / 21 on ao3 —

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you were already halfway back to campus before you noticed your phone was missing.

you'd completely forgotten about your desire to message sasha after you stepped out of the shower, taking a good, long look at your naked body in the steamed mirror. starting from your shoulder and ending around your sternum, your skin was scattered with deep marks that you were sure would be printed onto your skin for the rest of the week, maybe even some of the next, seeing as the worst of them were accompanied by the faint bordering of teeth. you wanted to be embarrassed, ashamed, anything that showed the slightest bit of maturity on your end, but you couldn't deny the feeling like you'd gotten a weight off your chest, like you'd reclaimed your emotional freedom by getting the chance to cry it out—and get it fucked out of you, too.

the only concern you held was whether eren would ever know. zeke didn't seem like the type to kiss and tell, he was laidback and easy-going enough to let you come in his home, drown away your sorrows in his alcohol, rightfully take your side despite your weak, albeit still there, insistence for him to take the middle ground and not feel angered on your behalf. plus, you didn't really know how to broach the topic of "can you please refrain from mentioning to your younger brother that you fucked me" without completely embarrassing yourself, but your dirty little secret felt safe with him.

you didn't know exactly how you'd make it up to him, you'd have to figure out some way that was feasible for a broke college student such as yourself. although, he was making it incredibly difficult to chart this incident off as a one and done sort of endeavor when you exited the bathroom just to find your clothes, cleaned and freshly dried, neatly folded on the bed, and the ibuprofen you'd requested with a glass of water waiting for you on the adjacent nightstand. zeke was being nice—a little too nice—but you couldn't help but feel your heart skip at his apparent concern. perhaps it was because you'd been emotionally neglected for a while, or maybe it was because zeke was an impossibly attractive older man who you wouldn't think would ever give you the time of day, or maybe a combination of both.

whatever it was, you allowed that stupid, giddy smile to stay on your lips as you tugged on your clothes, gulping down the two pills, mouth uncomfortably dry until you'd finished off the entire glass in one go. you chatted with him over your plate of eggs, noting that he'd changed out his sweatpants for a much smarter pair of dark trousers, white button up ironed and pristine, brown corduroy coat in one hand and mug of coffee in the other. you quickly finished up, noting the way he kept checking the expensive looking silver watch that fit perfectly over his wrist, accentuating the fine contour of his large hands.

you couldn't say that you were thrilled by the butterflies still fluttering about in your stomach, not at all made any better when he'd once again made an attentive offer to you. "it's kinda chilly out, the jacket you brought isn't really all that suited for the weather today.. wanna borrow one of mine?"

and so you left that morning wrapped up in a leather bomber jacket that was a size or two too big, having to stop yourself from breathing in the wonderful scent of his cologne still lingering on the collar as he walked you out of his apartment, so distracted that you hadn't even bothered to check if you had all your belongings in your purse until something reminded you of your desire to message your roommate.

you'd been driving past one of the shopping plazas you frequented when you had enough time—and money—to spare, catching sight of the many drive-thru restaurants open and quickly thinking of sasha. you owed her a bit of an apology for ditching out on her last night, especially after you'd assured her you would be back in time to watch the new episode of her favorite show when it premiered, but when you'd dug your hand into your purse to reach for your phone, you came up empty.

"fuck." you muttered to yourself, turning into one of her favorite restaurants anyways to get her something.

you didn't exactly have any phone numbers memorized aside from your mother's, you didn't really think anybody did these days, and it wasn't like you could go back and wait the entire day for him to get home. so you settled on roughing it until then, hoping that it'd just fallen out onto the floor of his apartment rather than in the parking lot of his complex where it could be stepped on, run over, stolen—any myriad of things that would assure your phone-less-ness for an irritatingly long time.

by the time you made it back to campus and up to your dorm, sasha was already awake enough to immediately pounce you at the site of the paper bag in your hand, nearly crying with gratitude as she unwrapped her double-patty burger, with extra cheese, as you'd remembered her emphasizing the first time you'd watched her place her order, and two large fries on the side.

"an' yuu ev'n rem'ber'd muh ord'r!!" she spoke around large bites, practically halfway done with it before she properly swallowed. you'd never met a girl who could eat like sasha could eat.

"it was the least i could do after completely ditching out last night." you said as you settled down on your bed with a sigh, shedding zeke's jacket.

"don't sweat it, i invited meeks over so i wasn't completely alone." she assured, then froze, glancing nervously at you like she expected you to be angry.

you weren't entirely thrilled with the fact that your roommate happened to become great friends with mikasa, but it wasn't your place to tell her to stop hanging out with her for the sake of some stupid rivalry over the boy. although, the situation had changed. she'd technically "won" at the end of the day, if she considered such foul play as a win, so you guessed that there really wasn't anymore reasons for tense silences and unnecessarily aggressive glares to be exchanged any longer.

"i'm glad you had fun last night," your smile seemed to ease sasha as she bit into a handful of fries, "even if i couldn't make it."

"so what happened? you went over to talk with one of eren's other friends right?"

you'd told sasha you'd been going over to see someone who knew eren, not exactly bringing in the detail that the said individual was his brother, but it was technically true. the blurry memory of last night flashed through your head, his lazy grins, full lips kissing and nipping over your skin, fingers and cock spreading you open so perfectly for him—

"i-it was nothing..! just got kind of carried away drinking, and he was nice enough to let me crash on the couch for the night."

oh, he let you do something on his couch alright. you hoped your face wasn't incriminating you as her gaze flickered down to the jacket.

"let you borrow his jacket too?" you nodded a bit too quickly, earning a crooked, teasing smile from the girl. "anyways.. what's the consensus? figure out anything new?"

that his best friend you hung out with last night and him cheated on me. "just talked about basic stuff, nothing's really set in stone yet, still mulling it over."

she nodded, already done with her burger and working through the first carton of fries. "did you have your phone on silent? i was worried you got kidnapped or something."

you chuckled through your nose, wandering over to your dresser as you began to unbutton your blouse, jerking to a pause when you remembered the very damning evidence of your own infidelity last night. "don't laugh, ok? i had my phone on silent, we ate dinner and drank, then i passed out, and i guess it fell out of my purse or something, because it wasn't in there when i went to text you if you wanted anything to eat."

"and you still got me something.. you're an angel." you rolled your eyes at sasha's wide, adoring gaze, laughing at the fact that the food took priority over your missing phone, "do you remember the guy's number..?" she wracked her brain for a moment before smacking around her mattress, tapping into her phone, "oh! i got it! he's one of eren's friends, right? if that's the case, mikasa'll have his number for sure."

you felt your back stiffen up, biting at the inside of your lip as you floundered for an excuse. "o-oh no, i wouldn't wanna bother her.. you know we're not on great terms, what happens if she asks why you need his number?" sasha's disgruntled frown encouraged you. "if she hears that you're only getting it for me, she probably won't give it to you."

"come on, she's not that bad." you shot her a look as you pulled a set of clean clothes out of your dresser drawers, opting to change in the closet, "alright fine... maybe she is that bad sometimes. but it's not like you killed her dog or something, and plus you're, like, her best friend's girlfriend-"

"for now." you interrupted, shutting the door and putting a barrier between you and your roommate's prying eyes, "and we barely even act like a couple anymore."

"for now." sasha repeated mockingly, mouth obviously full of fries, "but anyways, i'm sure she'll do this teeny favor for you—especially if i'm asking—so c'mon, give me a name!"

you tugged the long-sleeved sweatshirt over your head, checking yourself on the mirror hanging onto the back of the door to make sure you were entirely covered. "no, sasha. she already doesn't like me enough as it is, no need for us to interact and antagonize each other even more."

you walked out after pulling on your pair of athletic shorts, loose and comfortable around your slightly sore legs, laughing softly when she stuck her tongue out at you. "fine. be like that. keep secrets from your best friend in the whole wide world."

"ha-ha." you enunciated wryly, sitting back down onto your mattress and pulling your laptop from beneath your pillow. clicking through your itinerary for the coming weeks, you internally groaned. ironic how being a psych major could make you need a psychologist yourself.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

your password had been woefully easy to guess.

he'd tried the classic 1-2-3-4, almost thankful when the text at the top of the screen prompted him to enter a different combination, but a slight disappointment came when he tried your birthday and the phone opened without a problem. he'd at least expected to get locked out for a minute or two, but there he was, scrolling with free reign through your inordinate amount of apps at his seat.

he had plenty of time to laze around, seeing as the library didn't have many patrons at the moment, plus the elevated desk concealed the fact that he wasn't truly doing anything from the average passer-by. the sense of power he felt almost made him smile. these days, everybody had everything on their phones, and it made him wonder what secrets you could be hiding in this little device of yours. it was a few generations behind, not that he expected the latest and greatest from a college freshman, but still mostly intact with a obviously aged case, a few dents here, a scratch in the metal there, small cracks webbing from the corners of the screen protector, but all and all it functioned perfectly fine.

he was tempted to snoop further—maybe scroll through your contacts list to see if you had any mutuals he didn't know about, check to see if you actually cleared your browser history or just left out all your dirty laundry for anyone who tapped into your search engine to find—but he maintained some semblance of self-control, opening up your messages app and checking to see what his brother had said.

eren <3 10:53 am hey babe where are you right now

you missed a call from eren <3 (2)

eren <3 10:57 am i know we haven't gotten a chance to talk lately but please pick up

you missed a call from eren <3

eren <3 10:58 am youre making me nervous pick up

you missed a call from eren <3 (3)

zeke couldn't help but chuckle at his younger brother's emotional incompetence. your last message had been days ago, and from scrolling back in the texts he could see how you were attempting to initiate a majority of the conversation, and the sparse replies here and there from eren were nothing short of pathetically uninterested.

zeke pitied you—the desperate, doting, undeniably adorable college girl who wanted nothing more than to make eren happy—his brother didn't deserve such devotion. even if he wasn't truly sure if eren had really cheated on you, what he was sure about was the fact that this relationship was entirely weighed against your favor.

eren <3 11:03 am fuck i know i fucked up but i didntnfucking deserve that please tell me that wasnt you fuck please fuckign pick up i love you

you missed a call from eren <3 (4)

eren <3 11:08 am did you seriously fucking shut your phone off what the fcuk

eren <3 11:10 am you know what me and armin are coming back next week we'll talk then.

that's right, he'd gone out of the country with that scrawny little blonde kid that always flinched when zeke intruded on eren's hangouts, probably on his dad's dime too. zeke scoffed to himself, shaking his head as he tapped through your text conversation, quickly finding the "delete messages?" prompt and selecting all evidence of eren's one-sided correspondence, tapping the bright red "delete all" button at the bottom of the screen, and finally blocking his number just for good measure. all your old chats were still there, and he was sure that you'd gotten used to eren not messaging anyways, meaning he wouldn't have to worry about him reaching out to you for the time being.

slipping your phone back into his pocket with a sigh, he could feel that warm, smug feeling bubbling up in his chest. he knew he was only postponing the inevitable, that you'd find out the whole, horrible truth eventually, but it was almost fun to dance around the consequences like he was doing so right now. you were fun to play with, unassuming and prim one moment and brazenly shameless the next. there were layers to you, hidden bits that he was sure that he could coax you into revealing to him, slowly but surely bare your raw, unconcealed essence.

his thoughts were interrupted by someone at the counter, a girl who looked about your age with a shirt that was far too low for the way she was leaning toward him, pushing forward her library card with a single dainty finger and setting down a small stack of books. and somehow, he was thinking about you again as he flashed a charming smile that had convinced many other women before into getting a library card of their own.

that was the difference between you and everyone else, you didn't throw yourself at him, you didn't so blatantly vie for his attention, but instead silently appealed for it with your shy glances, small shifts in your posture when he drew near, and all those pretty little sounds that he could earn with a few gentle touches in just the right place. he could feel himself stirring in his pants just thinking about last night, glad that he'd made such a good first impression on you as he swiped the girl's card and scanned her books under the sensor next to the computer.

"all set for the next two weeks." he offered a small grin, passing back her things.

"thank you," she paused, making a show of dragging her eyes down from his face to the name tag pinned over his bicep, "zeke. i'll see you then."

she bit her lip as she stepped away from the counter, sauntering away towards the door with an obvious excitement. easier girls always held a place in zeke's heart, but there was nothing like the thrill of the chase that he found in you.

he heard the quiet swoosh of the automatic doors sliding open, glancing over absentmindedly to check out the newest patron. but he felt himself perk up in his seat at the sight of you, large canvas book bag hanging off your shoulder and, much to zeke's delight, still wearing his jacket. it took you a moment to notice him, but the change in your features enthralled him nonetheless, going from bored and almost tired-looking to surprised, then flustered as you froze, wide eyes trained on him. he chuckled to himself, nodding his head at you, almost beckoning you to come, and the self-satisfied smirk that drew across his lips was impossible to contain when you actually began your quick advance up to the counter.

"z-zeke, hi. i didn't know you worked here.."

"and i didn't know you came here." he rolled his chair closer, "i thought i would've seen you around by now."

"i usually go to the library on campus, but," the way you peered around, almost looking nervous to gaze directly at him, was strangely endearing to zeke, "i was just kinda looking for a change of scenery."

"fair enough." he said, remembering the weight of your phone in his pocket, "oh yeah, i'm glad you're here. my roommate called me earlier, said he found your phone on the floor back at the apartment."

you leaned forward at the mention of your phone—the complete lie he'd come up with just now—lips parted in surprise. it looked a lot like the expression he'd envisioned when he had his arms around you last night, pressing teasing kisses over your warm skin, but zeke held off on that thought for the moment.

"ah, i almost forgot about that..! well i'm glad it was that rather than it getting stolen or something.."

he checked his watch, very cognizant of your expectant gaze falling onto him the second he took his eyes off you. "i get off for lunch in about half an hour, if it's not too much trouble we can swing by my place, then i can bring you back here, maybe get you some lunch?"

you flushed brilliantly at that, barely containing your almost giddy smile as you nodded. "yeah thanks, that'd be really great actually! but you don't have to worry about getting me lunch.. i already owe you for dinner last night."

just dinner?, he thought, internally smirking, but he kept it to himself. "don't worry your pretty little head about it," your flustered reactions were addictive, "just go have a seat over in the working area and i'll come find you after i clock out."

you nodded, offering another small "thank you" before you obediently turned to traverse the scattered expanse of tables on the library floor and find yourself a spot to sit. the next thirty minutes felt unnecessarily long for zeke. he'd answered a few phone calls, worked through recording the stack of books he'd recovered from the "returned" box when he clocked in for his shift, but ended up giving into the temptation of shelving them himself instead of handing them off to the page to sneak a glance at you.

you'd settled at a long table nestled between the large shelves, entirely alone aside from another college student that zeke recognized from the frequency of his visits, but the modest amount of seats separating you let him know that you were strangers. you didn't seem to notice him when he drifted by, headphones in, entirely focused on your open laptop in front of you, jacket now zipped up halfway. he'd forgotten how cold the library was, mostly used to it after having worked there for nearly a year, not lingering in the aisle for too long before he finished up putting away the last of the books remaining in his arms and returning to the front.

"willy, i'm clocking out for lunch, can you watch the desk?" he called out when he caught the man emerging from the back.

"yeah, yeah, i've got you. but actually come back on time, alright?" he said, tying up his long blonde hair into a messy ponytail, "magath got on my ass last time i covered for you when you were late."

"can i make it up to you with some coffee?" zeke offered, grinning when his coworker grunted affirmatively, "text me your order, i'll get it to you on my way back."

and with that, he logged out of his account on the work desktop and left the chair for willy to sit in, wandering back out onto the floor to circle back around to where you were sitting.

he alerted you of his presence with a hand on your shoulder, smiling down at you. "ready to go?"

you nodded, quickly packing your things away into your bag and following him out of the library doors to his car. he opened the passenger door for you just to see that cute smile that always seem to draw across your lips when he did something you liked, slipping into the drivers' seat and syncing his phone to the car before he pulled out of the parking lot.

"the smiths, huh?" you mused from beside him as "heaven knows i'm miserable now" played across the radio's screen.

"you still listen to them?" he asked, remembering when he'd seen you in his parents' kitchen in their merchandise.

"sometimes." you replied, fiddling with the hem of your skirt.

"a little cold to be wearing a skirt, don't you think?"

"what? it's cute, isn't it?" you protested, prompting him to reach over the console with one hand to give the exposed skin of your thigh a few affectionate pats as he laughed softly.

"it is cute."

you fell quiet after that, obviously pleased with his attention but clamming up with that endearing introversion once again. he was content with watching you nod along to his playlist, smiling to yourself when something you recognized came up in the queue. the ride to his complex was short, and the walk up the staircase was silent, but he could feel your eyes lingering over him as you followed behind him, just as they had flickered over to glance at him when you thought he was focused on the road ahead. something about those tiny looks, shy smiles, the face of someone sheepish yet eager to please, it set zeke on fire.

he knew that he shouldn't be bringing you back to the apartment again, but he also knew that he had just about an hour to kill, and reiner was occupied with his own job and away once again, and you really did look great in that skirt and his jacket—

"give me a sec, i'm pretty sure my roommate put it in his room," zeke said, nodding over to the short hall across from the kitchen, knowing he couldn't just pull your phone out of your pocket right here and give it to you, "feel free to check the fridge if you're thirsty or something."

you gave an affirmative hum, wandering toward the kitchen as he turned to enter reiner's room. he was sure that his friend would throw a fit if he figured out he was in his room without his permission, seeing as he was such a stickler for personal privacy, but he wouldn't have to know, zeke was good a keeping secrets. or at least that's what he liked to tell himself, that he was good at lying and sneaking around and pretending like he wasn't bothered by things that made his blood boil, eren being a prime example of such a thing. nineteen years, and somehow in all that time he'd never matured past the age of twelve.

zeke rolled his eyes at the thought, pulling your phone out and wiping away his finger prints on the front of his shirt. the notifications from your assumed roommate were still on the lock screen, joined by a few more miscellaneous ones from earlier in the day, looking entirely untouched for the hours that it had been out of your possession. that lack of accountability he held for essentially stealing your phone eased him a bit as he ventured back out into the main space.

but he couldn't help the burning desire he felt for you when he saw you seated on the island in the kitchen, open water bottle in your hand, peering at him excitedly in expectance of your phone, jacket now hanging off of you from the warmth of the apartment. you didn't shy away like he thought you might as he approached, simply screwing the cap back on the bottle and straightened up your posture, hand outstretched with a smile on your face.

"here you are." he said, sliding your phone into your hand, legs nearly bumping yours from how close he was.

"thank you." you murmured in reply, turning it on for a quick check of your notifications just for your eyes to gravitate right back over to him.

there was something intoxicating about the way you gazed at him, with a meek yet faintly awe-struck look that always seemed to stroke his ego in just the right place. he usually liked confident women, who were well-aware of their beauty and prowess, but there was something about the way you hid yourself away, only showing what you felt necessary but still caving when he peeled away the layers concealing yourself one by one. you weren't desperate initially, not exactly standoffish either, just the perfect balance of reserved and alluring to draw him along after you. especially how you didn't seem to shy away from a challenge such as himself, despite how easy you were to fluster.

he checked his watch before he spoke, his voice low and full of intention. "we've still got about forty minutes before i have to get back." you licked your lips, eyebrows cinching upward just the slightest bit, head unconsciously tilting upwards towards his. though the height of the counter closed an inch or two of distance between the two of you, he still stood taller than you, pressing forward the smallest bit, able to feel your soft breaths fanning over his cheek. "so, what do you say..?"

you didn't speak, only giving a small nod, and that was all it took for zeke to close the space that was barely there between you, lips melding easily over your own. you let out a small sound of surprise, sending a jolt of heat straight through him, determined to make it happen again. your hands grasped at the front of his shirt, clenching at the fabric when his own rose to grip your thighs, spreading them to accommodate his presence and urge himself even closer to you. the feeling of your bare skin, pliant flesh that his fingers sunk so easily into, the knowledge that the only thing keeping him from you was your underwear under your skirt, was enough to make him even more impatient than he already was.

"didn't get enough last night, huh?" he breathed into your ear after he'd pulled away, grinning at the sight of your shaking head and your whispered "n-no".

he maintained enough control to not mark the skin exposed by your shirt when he reached it, but still nipped with enough pressure to pull more little moans that made his cock ache in the constraints of his pants. you didn't protest when the hands on your thighs slid further inward, gasping softly when he let a finger slowly stroke over your clothed cunt.

"and i've barely even touched you.. naughty girl." the way you bristled at his shameless words was endlessly enthralling to him, "already so needy for me..."

you squirmed as he palmed you through your underwear, attempting to speak, but your words always stammered off into an incoherent whimper, hips already rutting up as subtly as they could manage into his hand. "p-please, zeke. i w-want.."

"what do you want?" he pulled away from your neck, hazy, low-lidded eyes gazing directly into your own, "want my fingers in that little pussy of yours?"

you flushed brilliantly at his crassness, but nodded all the same, following up with a whimpered "yes, please..!"

you were begging with your mouth and eyes and he'd only just started, the fact that you were so eager from just the slightest touches made him impossibly hard. he lowered himself to his knees as quickly as he could, letting your heels rest on his shoulders to push yourself up off the counter long enough for him to peel your underwear off of you, sucking air between your teeth when you lowered your bare skin back down onto the cool granite.

he loved how compliant you were, how you let him adjust your position as he pleased, balancing yourself on one hand after he'd settled you on the edge of the island. he made sure to admire the way your face shifted when he ran a finger across your slick skin, thumb drawing across your clit to tease you for just a moment before he slid one finger into you.

"fuck.." he muttered to himself, admiring how you just barely arched toward him when he curled it inside you, retracting his hand and pushing in with a second finger.

he was sure that he could watch you all day, spread out on the kitchen counter, bottom lip reddening from being bitten so firmly between your teeth, eyes glassy and completely fogged over with lust. but he knew that he only had this single hour, regretting offering willy his promise of apology coffee, but deciding to take care of what he'd started and still having time to spare.

plucking his glasses from his nose, he set them on the counter beside your phone, pressing a lingering kiss over one of the thighs beside his head as a silent way to let you know his intentions, pleased to see nothing but anticipation etched across your flushed features as he proceeded. his first lick was intentionally slow, savoring the full body tremble you gave and the flavor of you on his tongue, grasp on your flank fastening to hold you apart while he continued.

he groaned at the hand that shakily clenched in his hair, the one clasped over your mouth doing little to contain the whines and baseless pleas spilling from your lips. zeke was certain his neighbors hated him by now, but he could honestly care less about such a menial detail like that when it was you moaning loud enough to be heard all the way down the hall, solely because of him. and a part of him had to wonder if eren had ever been able to satisfy you the way he had last night—the way he was now—if he'd ever gotten to fully explore and appreciate all the little things you had to offer. his younger brother was juvenile at best in his eyes, and, as far as he knew, entirely inexperienced until he began dating you. but zeke didn't mind showing up the kid, especially not when you deserved to feel as good as he made you feel. after all, he still had just about a week until ramifications were entirely inescapable, he could keep having fun with you for those couple days at the very least.

he pushed the more complicated thoughts from the forefront of his mind, choosing instead to focus on you in front of him, eyes low-lidded and unfocused, now biting onto one of your knuckles, hips rolling into his mouth and fingers in an obvious chase for your release. he rolled his tongue across your clit in quick, ruthless strokes, grinning against you when you whined, eyes rolling back into your head as it felt back toward the ceiling, your hold in his hair almost painfully tight. he could feel the tell-tale stiffen of your muscles, curling his fingers to rub at that part that seemed to drive you wild, catching the stammered end of his name on your lips as you came.

even from his place on the ground, he could see how your chest heaved, legs still quivering, wearing an almost dazed expression until you'd blinked away the fogginess in your eyes. your sheepishness returned when you watched him lick his lips, still slick with your arousal, whimpering softly at the departure of his fingers. he adjusted himself in his pants before stepped away, allowing you to recollect yourself while he proceeded over to the kitchen sink, washing his hands and patting away the remaining stickiness from his chin with the paper towel he used to dry them, watching with a close-lipped grin as you slowly lowered yourself back onto the ground and pulled up your underwear.

he checked his watch after he'd situated his glasses onto his face, frowning. only the better part of twenty minutes left in his break. "ready to get going?" he asked, running a hand through his hair to smooth it back down, his casual tone seeming to ease you.

"mhm." you replied, straightening out your clothes and beginning to shrug his jacket back onto your shoulders before you glanced over at him, "do you want this back? i didn't mean to steal it from you.."

"keep it." he said, plucking his keys from his pocket and proceeding towards the door, "it looks good on you." he didn't even have to look back at you to know that you were smiling.

the car ride was once again mostly silent, seeing as you were tapping through your phone and looking at everything you'd missed in the time you were away from it. but when he'd pulled into the starbuck drive-thru to get willy his unnecessary complicated order and turned to ask if you wanted anything, he caught you looking at your text conversation with eren before you shut your phone off and asked for a chai latte and a butter croissant, and he felt an odd twinge in his chest as he delivered your request and his own of an unsweetened cold brew to the speaker beside his rolled down window.

was it irritation? jealousy? possessiveness? for the first time in a while, he was unsure of how he felt. it was a bit unnerving, but also fascinating all at once. he could've never expected this sort of outcome from the situation, but it wasn't entirely unwelcoming. now that he thought about it, his life had been a bit dull lately, a cyclical routine of attending his job, going out for drinks on tuesday, the occasional sexual conquest here and there with women he met but never remembered, but your call had been a break in the routine, an expected opportunity that he was determined to not let slip through his fingers. and while he would've probably just been satisfied with allowing your name to join all the others in the blurry recesses of his memory at first, he knew now that there was much more for him to discover.

so he let you finish up the lunch he'd gotten you, turning up the radio and escorting you back to the library, feeling far too satisfied with himself as he watched you disappear between the shelves, proceeding back behind the desk and setting willy's coffee down beside him. "don't get up yet, i have to piss."

he groaned frustratedly at that. "why didn't you fucking do that on your break, you ass."

"i got your coffee in the drive-thru." zeke replied absentmindedly, already stalking off to the staff bathroom in the back with the thought of you on the counter playing over and over in his head.

only after locking the door and settling on the toilet did he finally let out a heavy sigh, tapping into his camera roll and quickly finding his picture of you from this morning. just the sight of your half-exposed body made his pants feel tight once again, and he regretted not taking more photos when he had the chance, but this would be enough for now, especially with the memory of you begging for him not even an hour ago fresh on his mind.

he didn't feel any sort of shame as he unzipped his pants and pulled himself out of his boxers, the tip of his cock already slick with pre, ready for the release he'd denied himself for the sake of time—and your satisfaction, of course—the release he'd be granting himself right now, with you just a couple meters away, entirely unaware that it was all because of you.

✧·ﾟ: *✧·ﾟ: *:·ﾟ✧*:·ﾟ✧·ﾟ: *✧·ﾟ*:·ﾟ✧*:·ﾟ✧·ﾟ: *✧·ﾟ:*·ﾟ✧*:·ﾟ✧·ﾟ: *✧·ﾟ:*

previous chapter⥽ | ⥼next chapter

#zeke yeager #zeke jaeger #zeke yeager x reader #zeke yeager x you #zeke jaeger x reader #snk zeke #zeke jaeger smut #zeke yeager smut #snk x reader #snk x you #aot x reader #aot x you #aot x reader smut #shingeki no kyoujin x reader #shingeki no kyojin fanfiction #m.nsfw

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wickedpact · 4 years

Note

Are you at all scared that an OG sequel might do something that retrogrades or diminishes the beautiful Nicky/Joe dynamic. We all have such high expectations of a sequel, but I do not want it if it means losing what we already have.

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm not especially i dont think

i have two concerns re: new content (referring to both the sequel and tales thru time)

1. joe or nicky or joenicky getting Done Dirty is a concern but admittedly not a huge one. i mean, the way greg talks abt joenicky u can kind of tell theyre his babies, as much as andy is the lead of the comics and nile is the lead of the movie, greg talking about joenicky is different than greg talking abt any of the others. & on top of that gina also loves them and as director she generally gets the biggest say. im sure skydance & netflix have caught on as well to the fact that joenicky are fan favorites, so i doubt theyll do anything to fuck them up at least.

(and tbh, joe and nicky got treated verrrry well in both the comic and more so the movie, considering the fact that their existence is only barely relevant to the plot, and their dynamic really only adds uh, narrative flavor, i guess. nile and andy’s relationship, for example, is important bc it has to do with nile’s [and andy’s!] character arcs thru the movie. joe and nicky, however, arent leads, only sort of have thematic relevance, and just barely have plot relevance [they get kidnapped and thats mostly it]

of course the group comes off as more of a family bc of their existence, and theyre kind of the emotional backbone of the team, but in terms of the story the movie is telling [ie. nile becoming immortal and adjusting to it] they only.. kind of contribute. greg mentioned once that one of the producers suggested that the van scene get cut bc it doesnt contribute to nile’s story...... which... is true, but i think we can all agree the movie is better with that scene in it

which is all to say............ joe and nicky get treated very well considering their (lack of) role in the story, so im not hugely concerned theyre going to get sidelined or written poorly in the sequel bc they were handled so well in tog1- since they didnt really need to be handled well in tog1, but they were anyways)

so.. i suppose its a concern in that its technically a possibility, but them getting written poorly isnt at the top of my list of concerns for future tog content

1b. tho admittedly if they do get any kind of crusades-era content (flashback, prequel, whatever) i do worry about their relationship coming off as like.. . .. .. Pocahontas, But Gay!™ which. urgghghskggkdksggggggh

2. this is less of a concern about how they’ll be written but rather a concern of how theyll be reacted to, but in fandoms where there are usually big content droughts between things getting produced, people tend to....... get really attached to headcanons, and even a few months post-tog1 i have seen a lot of that in this fandom, and i see a lot of people arguing over characterization (like.. porn disc-horse aside) and honestly i have straight up seen so many posts that are like ‘why do people write [character] like [canon traits that the character canonically has, in canon] and not [random ass hc the op has and seems to believe is canon for some reason]??’

so i kind of have a concern with tog2 or tales thru time.... like, proving popular hcs wrong and people arguing over it. having hcs that divorce from canon is fine! its just when people try to like... ‘enforce’ their hcs by passing them off as canon it kind of becomes a problem, and i just know there are probably going to be arguments about new canon.

#especially since ppl who seem to dislike the tog comics are getting rlly hype for tales thru time #i dunno i think it all bodes poorly #you didnt ask for sucha long response anon but here it is #Anonymous

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cloveroctobers · 4 years

Text

• ROHAN WASTI•

IG info/bio: @/niceguyroasti | 175k followers | Just here for a bit of fun 🤹🏽‍♂️! They don’t call me the brown handstand king for nuthin, mate 🎪🤸🏽‍♂️

(23) 25 (26) years old

From Wolverhampton, England

Before you ask...no he’s never met Liam Payne but Rohan’s sure he’s a great lad. (He was asked this question in one of his lives, he secretly thinks it was talia from one of her secret burner stan accounts lol) He’s got a nice tune with a boogie w da hoodie that he likes??

Anyways...he’s of Pakistani heritage

His mother used to work for a printing press company until she along with 15 other employees were laid off back in Sargodha

She was out of work for months becoming a stay at home mom (which his father initially wanted)

While his father continued in ironwork

They uprooted their family to the uk two years later after Rohan’s father also got laid off

Rohan was about 7 years old when they moved to Wolverhampton

he picked up on the English language faster than his parents

Always a quick learner

He has two younger brothers

Who are really his cousins/friends of the family that his parents brought home from Pakistan after their parents passed in a tragic accident

he was eleven years old when he met them at the airport and was super excited to have sibs! & even encouraged his mom to let him buy them something they would like sort of like a ice breaker which they seemed to appreciate 😭

His parents wanted him to major in software engineering or any form of engineering really but that quickly became a “hell no” vs “hell yeah” after those courses started to rot his brain?

So what does he do? He decides he’s gonna major in psychology instead!

That seems more of his speed? Kinda? As long as he’s not dealing with that hardware shit then that’s cool with him tbh

Psych held more of his interest since he doesn’t have a issue with the whole science aspect tied into it but it’s deff lengthy and can be draining sometimes too

He doesn’t psychoanalyze everything like our girl marisol does

marisol will be like “hmm...you’re distributing narcissistic behavior based on your superego more than your ego ya know?”

but Rohan will either think it or think nothing of it and just continue to go with the flow lol. He’s that kinda guy

Why was he majoring in this in the first place? Just to say he had the degree in something maybe?

He’s 50/50 thinking he’ll just get the degree he’s halfway there but he really wants to be part of the circus

And now has circus themed tatts that he’s proud of thank u

Always had the obsession with all that comes with the circus, he had his paternal grandfather to thank for that

His grandfather used to juggle along with other forms of entertainment but mostly juggling on the street back in Pakistan to earn $ since there were a lack of jobs

The atmosphere there also was what got him into doing handstands cause why tf not

You can absolutely guess that the acrobats, trapeze acts, and tightrope entertainers are his favorites to watch

His parents just assumed it was a hobby of his and never took him serious even tho he openly said growing up that’s something he would like to do in life

He now understands the purpose of “freak shows” even tho he can honestly say those parts of the circus used to terrify him until he learned that not everyone is the same and there should be no shame in that

He will train on the side until he finishes his degree to make his parents happy but he knows he truly belongs in the circus and that’s where he will be someday whether his parents approve or not— after all this is his life

Lives on campus and is currently looking for a flat off campus to share with a roommate or two (he thought about asking jake & Tim but decided against it FOR NOW)

Mostly had temporary and odd jobs to get by each semester, has not had a steady job due to fully being a full-time student

He’s tried to be a full time student and full time employee (working as a package delivery man) just to burn himself out and never attempted to be a part time employee. It was not something he could handle sorry

His mother spoils him...he’s a bit of a mama’s boy

When it comes to relationships, it never seems to be what he thinks it is? One moment things are going great then the next he’s in the friend zone so he’s never quite sure where he stands with his significant others?

Which is why he thinks it’s safe to always start off in the friend zone or unintentionally puts those who have interest in him in the friend zone because that’s what’s comfortable to him

however if he’s really into you & you’re showing that you’re into him but it’s causal dating or whatever u want to call it? & you up and decide to pick the other over him catching him off guard he’s gonna be in his feelings about it 100% ex.) how he picked erikah over mc the 2nd time around and felt some type of way when erikah hopped on reeses dck

he wants communication even if it’s hard

and he wants someone to love unconditionally and for them to love him back

Definitely likes to sweep his loves off their feet

Especially when he’s kissing! The whole dipping you while you kiss, hand on the small of your back, or hands gripping your waist while he’s pressed up against you. Probably likes to bend you over things or have you pressed up against objects as well—Sign me tf up

I feel like he’s always warm and his hands are surprisingly soft with how many handstands he does in a damn day

He purchases hand moisturizing gloves

can always hold his own weight

enjoys core exercises

Will carry you on his back or his shoulders if you need to see better at festivals/concerts

He’s sexually fluid

It’s canon/hinted that something went on between him & jake when mc walked in that we missed by a few seconds or even a minute but I do think he’s attracted/was to jake and it’s canon that jake is bi bby

Plus he got excited when mc suggested that he’d date jake if jake doesn’t find someone in the villa so BOOM 🤗

Always active as a kid trying to do flips and shit likes he’s doing parkour much like Bobby ending up with bruises, scrapes, and surprisingly no broken bones? Well maybe scratch that last bit out...He did crack his head open a little bit once giving his mother a heart attack but his mother doesn’t dare speak of it — haram!

Loves his sleeveless shirts and silver thick chains

Keeps a five o’clock shadow + might grow a little stubble here and there, feels like it’s part of his signature look

Won’t grow a full beard due to the racism/prejudice he witnessed his father, grandfather, uncles, and cousins go thru!

Will spend coin on some aftershave, none of that cheap shit when it comes to that! Sorry he takes pride in his facial area

probably went thru a mild case of cystic acne when puberty hit & had some insecure moments when it comes to his appearance & still has moments where it’ll hit even tho he beat it thanks to some remedies but tries his best not to let it get to him

He knows how to manage his $ but can splurge every now and then but will never showcase what he has — that’s v corny to him to be overly flashy. He’s looking at y’all @/leggy @/jasper/@/miles

Doesn’t take high quality photos of himself, it’s always zoomed in or extra zoomed in photos—yup he’s got that type of feed

Regrets putting mc in the friend zone & wishes he put more effort in making things work with erikah

But slowly learned to be happy that she’s with Reese even if he wasn’t at first. He really thought there could have been something for him & erikah

he secretly thinks their “relationship” is superficial & based off of shallowness and lust. What else do they have? Nothing that he could have given her but what’s the point in being bitter over this?

Reese is a shit stirrer that thinks he can get anything he wants because of the way he looks & if he knows outside info that he can use again you, he WILL

& erikah? He doesn’t know where her head is at majority of the time. She likes to throw rocks then acts like she didn’t mean to do it but why do it in the first place if you didn’t mean to? + she seems to lose interest fast if they don’t fit her standards besides their physical appearance...yeah Rohan caught all of that

So did she even genuinely like him or want to besides what he brought to the table physically? Who knows

He just thinks people deserve their chance at happiness and he possibly could have had it if he wasn’t standing in his own way...and he absolutely won’t stand in anyone else’s way if they don’t see potential happiness with him

He’s cool with cherry but deep down he knew there wouldn’t be anything long term between him & her after some time. She’s a beautiful/hot girl but she wasn’t his type + he didn’t like how she portrayed herself in the villa even tho she claims there was more than what meets the eye when it comes to her

she proved that to him which she didn’t HAVE to!!! outside of the house and they actually remained friends unlike the now growing distance he has with erikah

I cannoned that him and Hannah give it a go. I think they’d be cute together? She told him from the moment they met at a festival that they were now dating after they ended up holding hands but he didn’t take her seriously since she was a little drunk?

She messaged him two days later asking him when they were going on their date and that was enough for him to give it a go

They only lasted for a couple of months since they outgrew each other slowly but surely. ‘Not all things are temporary,’ he had to remind himself

It was no bad blood thankfully and they continued to be friends with him wishing her well on her new relationship with Carl. He was genuinely happy for her as he always was for his friends

Cannot cook for shit but makes the best coffee with cinnamon & cardamom

once tried to make Aloo Chaat but with a twist! With the use of Potato Skins instead! for a family dinner party and his mum almost sent him home due to the insults his father spewed at rohan trying to fool them all that it was his wife who prepared such a thing

It is evident that his father only enjoys his wife’s cooking

he still makes it for himself when he’s starving despite what his father thinks

Is fluent in Urdu, English came second

Never ashamed of his culture although his father thinks he is...

His fav shows are misfits + the IT crowd and he is currently watching & enjoying truth seekers + mr. selfridge since Tim recommended it to him ofc

his fav American show is the challenge

when asked what his fav American movie is, he got dragged since ppl assumed it would be the greatest showman but he can’t take all the singing...musicals aren’t his thing sorry

But he’ll bust out a rap only if Tim & jake are around, he rarely does it alone

Even looked into producing music for fun but never took THAT seriously

closest with jake & Tim, doesn’t have much of a relationship with the other lads 🤷🏽‍♀️ but there’s no real beef with anyone he knows how to let shit go

But you’ll never catch him having a chat with Reese or following him back on ig. What they had to say to each other was already said and done so?

If erikah agrees to get engaged to Reese, he’s happy for her but cordial to him

if she doesn’t end up with Reese, he’ll be her shoulder to lean on if she needs it

his love language is physical touch with a splash of acts of service

Commonly sleeps curled up, his mum says he was like that in the womb as well—(same dude)

He’s probably a good 5’9 - 5’7 on bad days

Is he a Pisces? Idk

His signature cologne is probably Antaeus by Chanel which is described to have notes of: lemon, lime, coriander and sage w. A blend of thyme, basil and rose

Loves black pepper, specifically garlic, onion, black pepper, and sea salt all mixed together

has a vitiligo spot on the right side of his lower spine that is commonly covered with the waistband of whatever bottoms he has on

has a pogo stick

Wants to go skydiving next, has gone bungee jumping—which was such a adrenaline rush!!!

probably knows a few tips on how to survive in the wild or if the apocalypse hits...you can never be too sure

If he ever gets a pet he might get something like: Satanic Leaf tailed Gecko, Kinkajou, or a Pac-Man frog. He likes being different okay

he actually enjoyed season 3 despite the negative remarks made about it. It was “different” basically drama free which was a shocker knowing how production likes to take things take a shot every time ro explains his decisions/opinions as such lol

BUT he won’t go as far to say he liked it better than his season yet he did enjoy keeping up with it. He def has a crush on iona, aj, vieve, Camilo & tai

Yasmin actually joined one of his lives, which he doesn’t do too often but he couldn’t sleep one night and thought he’d give it a go. She’s quite nice & quiet but he ultimately felt calm around her + they bonded over bohemian lifestyle & his love for the circus + a little about their cultures

Long term goals? He doesn’t have a set timeline of when he wants everything to happen because pressure is not fun

but he wants to be in love and loved back, wants to be married, wants to have kids, wants to try out the circus for awhile and if that doesn’t work out he can always fall back on his psych degree—he just wants to be happy and share that with someone, that’s one of the biggest adventures he can possibly have

His anthem = Blxst, “No Love Lost”

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freshouttaparsnips · 4 years

Photo

The interesting thing about working at a grocery store was that typically you got all your groceries and miscellaneous from the same place you worked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

next chapter XD this time with the Fell bros ;)

tags: Homelessness issues, flat tires

read chapter 2: Meeting the Fell Bros on Ao3

or read it below!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The interesting thing about working at a grocery store was that typically you got all your groceries and miscellaneous from the same place you worked. It was a nice enough shop; the owners carried anything and everything, sort of like a Dollar Tree, only with a little more quality. But on occasion, on rare, rare occasion, you needed something they didn’t have, which led you to heading over to the local (and by local it was a half hour drive) Walmart.

You detested Walmart, not only because you couldn’t bring Peony in, but because the lights were overly bright and the sounds and people were abrasive as hell. It was an ADHD nightmare that you relived every time you needed something special that your own store didn’t carry, whatever the reason. Usually the trips in didn’t take that long, and you were out back into the fresh air, ready to find a new place to park for the night with Peony. Sometimes they dragged on and on, leaving you to stumble out of the sensory pit of hell into the cool night air, still needing to find a place to bunk down for the night.

The elderly couple running your workplace would have let you stay in their own parking lot, but because of bullshit permits and other inane city things, they couldn’t have vehicles parked in their lot for longer than two days at a time, or they’d be fined. It was unfortunate, and under any other circumstances they probably would have let you do it anyways.

In tight spots, you’d taken them up on their offer. Sometimes you couldn’t afford a permit to park by the Walmart, or in the parking lot of the library. But your favorite place to stay, and the place you were headed now, was the Mt. Ebbott camping grounds.

They didn’t question why you set up with the tiniest tent known to man, sharing it with a dog that took up most of the space. Or why you always came, made a small fire that night to cook popcorn on, stared at the stars for hours, then left before anyone else was awake the next morning. You didn’t like staying too long, not whenever other people were there to play loud music or throw around trash.

It was the perfect place to stay, to breathe in the scents of fresh moss and old stones, a place to recharge and relax without worrying about getting in trouble for loitering when you were just walking your dog.

Peony was sniffing the slightly open window, licking her chomps every so often as she caught a whiff of the nearby restaurants you passed. Sighing, you gave in to her adoring, pleading eyes, stopping through the drive thru of a little burger chain and getting you both the biggest burger they had with extra cheese. It was the weekend, payday, meaning you could splurge a tiny bit before you stuffed the rest into gas, food and savings.

While Peony happily munched away at her burg, you focused on the highway leading out of town, and through the woods, taking the exit that headed up the mountain. The air cooled the higher you went, your ears popping as you grinned at the worn, wooden sign reading that you were a few miles out from the camp grounds.

Which was why, when you saw the little red car sitting on the side of the road with a tire missing and a couple of dudes standing around it looking aggravated, you felt a little perturbed yourself even as you pulled over behind them a little ways.

They both looked up at you as you started to climb out of your car, their red eyelights burning from black sockets almost putting you at a pause. Taking a breath, you squared your shoulders, stepping out of the car and shutting your door before Peony, god bless her soul, could try to strangle herself attempting to get out.

“Got a flat?” You called, the tallest skeleton staring back down at the offending tire while the shorter started a few steps in your direction.

“Yeah, damn thing near tried ta put us over the barriers.” He said, voice deep and afflicted with a rough gravel. He seemed like the smoking type, if the way his fingers twitched every so often was an indicator. You shrugged.

“I’ve got a spare in my trunk, if you wanna see if she’ll fit.”

The short skeleton laughed, a chortle of sound, you grinning as you waved him over to the back of your car.

You could hear his boots hitting the gravel as he came up behind you, your trunk popping open with a loud thunk, Peony whining from the front seat as you searched for the tire. “You boys heading to the campsite?” you asked, at least trying to make small talk so the lurking wouldn’t be so creepy.

He grunted. “Me and Paps, we do this every couple months ‘er so. Get out of the house, get some fresh air. ‘E thinks its good fer me ‘er somethin’, I dunno.”

Turning back to him, tire hefted into your hands, you nodded. “Its nice to get away.”

He just stared at you for a moment, before gingerly taking the tire and heading back for his own car. You followed, watching the much taller skeleton glare down at the flat with a stare that would have killed lesser men.

“Sans, have you found a replacement?” he asked, tone angry but his expression worried. If you had to guess, this wasn’t really in their plans for the evening, and what with the sun getting lower in the sky, these roads could get a little treacherous in the dark. They may have been Fellgrounders, but you knew from experience that ending up down a river bank was not a fun way to spend the night.

“Yeah, this ‘ere human gave us their spare.” Sans answered, getting down on one knee to replace the tire, while the taller turned to stare at you.

“What would you like as payment?” He asked, and you blinked. Really you… hadn’t even thought about them paying you for it or anything, it wasn’t like you were going to use the tire any time soon; it didn’t even fit your car. Thankfully, it seemed to fit theirs, Sans standing back on both feet with a creak and a groan.

Realizing you still hadn’t responded, you shook your head, shifting on the gravel road. “Naw, I don’t need anything. Just wanted to help out, y’know?”

Tall skeleton stared hard at you, seemingly into your very soul by the way his eyelights flared with intensity. Then he just looked tired, fishing out his wallet and grabbing a little laminated card before handing it over to you.

“Well, if you do find you need anything, anything at all. Please send a text or call.”

You took the card, holding it in your hand as they both lugged the flat tire into their own trunk, Sans waving goodbye as you watched them climb into the little Jeep and make a U-turn around you. You waved as they headed back down the road, seemingly uninterested in making the rest of the way up the mountain in the dark… which suited you just fine.

You needed some alone time, and damn if you weren’t gonna get some. Hopping back into your car, you gave Peony a few healthy scritches under the chin for being such a good girl, and turned your brights on.

You didn’t have a chance to check the card he’d given you until later, and the words on it almost made you laugh.

~The Phone Number of the Great Edge~

Well. Now you had two of those to your collection. You sort of wondered why this was happening now, but you were along for the ride, for better or worse.

#fresh writes #undertale #fontcest #papyrus/reader #sans/reader #underfell papyrus #underfell sans #angst #mentions of homelessness

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peyyyton · 4 years

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hi everyone! i go by river, use he/they prns, and this here is my boy peyton kang. i’m really excited to write with you all, so pls leave a like if you want to plot and i’ll get to you asap! i do prefer to use dscord ( gaylittlesan#7578 ! ) but i’ll reach out with ims and we can go from there <3 under the cut will be some info on pey!

━♡ guess the 24 YEAR OLD MARCH baby just arrived to dallyeog! it makes sense, because PEYTON KANG is just as LIVELY as the month of MARCH. wait, why do they remind me of KIM JONGIN? beyond that, they seemed ALLURING & DETERMINED upon first glance. i heard someone say they’re sort of RECKLESS & ABRASIVE though. i hope they get acquainted here in COMPLEX 1 / APARTMENT 9 / FLOOR 4 ; HE seems to have a lot going on with HIS job as BARTENDER / BUSKER.

i don’t have a proper bio yet so pls bare with me T_T

born and raised in chicago, peyton is a 24 yr old march baby from a normal upper middle class family. he’s a pisces/aries cusp. no he is not okay.

he has 2 younger siblings and he is Very much an obnoxious older brother

his sister phoebe is actually tiktok famous (much to his surprise, she has a few million followers) and he’s been featured in some of her videos if ur familiar w the app .. maybe u recognize him

honestly he’s kind of a himbo fuckboy dudebro but he’s also a mama’s boy and he’s not intentionally mean usually or anything so like... give him a chance !!

he was super popular in high school and college, ur stereotypical star athlete. very charming, athletic, all the girls wanted him B)

as popular as he was, his parents are a little crazy. they’re both ‘functional’ alcoholics and ended up divorcing when peyton was eighteen. it was lowkey a huge mess and he hates thinking about it 🙈 his mom got custody and things r still a little awkward w/ dad but they stay in contact. kinda.

he was a bit of a troublemaker in high school bc of problems at home. he got into fights, snuck out, messed around, stupid teenage shit yknow. high school was crazy for pey but once the divorce was finally settled, he was in college and had the chance to mature a lot.

while he wasn’t getting into fights or doing extremely stupid shit anymore (just regular stupid shit), peyton was still ur basic fuckboy at university. he partied, slept around and uh. yes. he was in a frat at one point. he hated it LMAO

peyton was also on the school’s soccer team, which he had to keep his grades up for so he Does have a decent head on his shoulders even if he is a bit of a himbo. he has a good heart underneath it all i promise.

he ended up majoring in philosophy (which he rly had no idea what was going on most of the time) and tried to explore different things during college, but he never found anything that seemed to click.

immediately after earning his degree, peyton decided to pack up his things and move to south korea on a whim in order to ‘find himself’. to do some soul searching, if u will. he has no idea what he wants to do with his life, and after being so adored in school, the world seems super fucking daunting to him. but he likes to hide his insecurities by being sexy. just cool guy things u know

he’s been in korea just for a few years now - currently he’s doing well as a bartender (yes he does brag about tips), and sometimes you’ll catch him singing and playing the guitar on the street when he’s bored out of his mind. he’s literally just some guy but he dresses and acts like he’s the dumbest coolest around and u know. sometimes he's right. but most of the time he’s just some guy

wanted connections / plots!

crazy exes!!! exes on good terms!! ex fwbs!!! all the exes

peyton has a one night stand w/ someone after a wild night and the last thing he expects is to find out they live in the same apartment complex

past + present hookups/fwbs in general. peyton IS a hoe

‘no u cannot get a free drink just because we live in the same apartment complex’

american friends? or just buddies he speaks english with

ride or dies!!! best friends!!! peyton was by himself and super lonely when he first came to kr so i’d love him to have some bffs that he can annoy n will annoy him back

peyton broke ur heart... and he said oops?

someone is making a Lot of noise after peyton has a very late and unpleasant shift and he is not happy about it

perhaps,, an online friend since peyton is from the states? maybe they’ve never actually met irl but have been close online for years. he’s not easy to open up, so ur muse could see a completely different side of him thru the screen :o

cousins/family friends that peyton could have had from when he visited korea growing up

ur not interested or impressed by peyton at all (doesn’t have to be romantic) and it hurts his pride just a little

peyton is actually bisexual, he just doesn’t have that much experience with guys. but maybe ur muse was/is the one to change that 🤨

love interests .. non-endgame ships.. i want it all!!!

ANYWAY that is all i have rn.. i will hopefully get out a proper plot page sometime soon, but for now you can check out peyton’s bare bones profile here if u so desire! if u read this whole post i literally owe u my life so <3 pls come plot w me <3

#* ooc.#WAH #hope this makes sense #im excited for this stupid ass boy

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my-fan-side · 4 years

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Unconventional (Chapter 2)

A/N: Thank you everyone who have liked and reblogged and made a comment on the first chapter. I hope you’ll enjoy the rest of the story.

In case you missed it:

Chapter 1

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Chapter 2

The flight on their way home was quiet. Cassian’s arms are tense around his mate, and his jaw was hard and gritting. He wants to say something but is still trying to find the right words to say to her. He knows that one wrong word can lead up to them fighting, and he doesn’t want that. He also knows that Nesta is aware of his predicament, and he’s thankful that she’s not pushing him to talk…yet.

They got home, prepared for bed, and was already laying on it, about to go to sleep when Nesta finally decided to break the silence.

“Alright, spit it out.” She flips to the other side of the bed, now she’s facing Cassian. Her mate however was lying on his back, arms crossed in his chest as he kept on staring at the ceiling.

Cassian sighs, they were both stubborn to initiate this conversation. But they had a rule not to let the night pass without discussing whatever was bothering them. And to be honest, a few more seconds and he would have been the one to begin the talk.

“It’s just…” Cassian can’t seem to put his thoughts into words, he just furrowed his brows and growls when he realized he can’t finish his sentence. Nesta can’t help but smirk though, sometimes he’s just so adorable when he’s being territorial. She lifts her upper body from the bed, leans on one of her elbows and look down on her mate’s face. Using her index and middle finger, she traced the wrinkled lines that form on Cassian’s brow, and he eases his glare towards the ceiling, then turn his eyes to meet Nesta’s.

Cassian tilted his head towards his mate and asked quietly. “Why?”

“Why what?” Nesta answered, now resting her cheek on his stomach.

Cassian, tucked her mate’s hair on her pointed ears before he answered. “Why are you friends with him? Why is he giving you a dress? Why didn’t I know about how close you are?” he said, his hazel eyes not leaving Nesta’s blue greys.

Nesta took her time thinking how to answer Cassian without hurting him further. Because he was hurt, more than angry, and she feels it too from her side of the bond. “Eris. I can’t give you an exact answer on how we became friends, it just happened as we work together whenever I was in their court. As to why we are friends? I guess he never gave me reason not to be friends with him.” She shrugged. “I know that you and the rest of the circle have some deep history with him Cass. Something I probably will never understand because I wasn’t there. But believe me, if I had ever sensed something was off or felt any bad intention reeking off of him, I wouldn’t let myself spend even just a minute with him. You know that. You know me.” She’s now tracing the tattoos swirling on his chest as she speaks. “Again, he just didn’t give me any reason not to give him at least a chance to know him. And it wouldn’t be fair to him if I solely based how I would treat him on what you told me about him. If there’s anyone who would know about giving someone a chance…”

“Stop. It’s not the same. You’re not the same.” Cassian cut her off.

“I’m not saying we are. But you did get what I meant, right?” Cass sighed at this and gave her a slight nod.

Nesta kissed him on the cheek before continuing on giving him answers. “Why did he give me a dress? I don’t know, maybe he just wants to? Friends give each other gifts, right? Will I wear it? I wouldn’t if you don’t want me to, Cass.” She assured her mate on this.

“Now, why you didn’t know we are close enough to tease each other & giving gifts? Well, we never really talked about how I spend my days in the Autumn court in details, because we both know it’s mostly about work. And those were discussed on a formal meeting. My conversation with him outside work were sometimes small talks or are far in between. It’s just who he is.” Nesta explained it casually to Cassian.

Cass rolled his eyes on this. “I get that, it’s just… you should’ve told me there was something going on?”

“There wasn’t anything going on.” She paused making sure Cassian is listening to her. “I talk with him about work, sometimes not work-related topics when it arises. That’s it. We, you and I, we just don’t talk about every little discussion I have with everyone in Autumn. Like when Eris told me about the book he last read, or her mom shows me her favorite flower, not even when Elain accidentally broke a 200 year old vase.” She snorts as she remembers that. “I didn’t tell you those things because I don’t think you would be interested to know them. It’s just not the kind of things we talk about.”

“Yes, we are friends, I honestly don’t see anything wrong with that. And it’s not something you should worry about. It’s not and probably won’t be as profound as what you have with Az, Mor, Rhys and Amren.” She finished her explanation to her mate.

“Well, I sure as hell hope not. I have been through hell and back with our circle, and I’m not going to let you go through anything of that sorts for that guy!” He wrapped his arms around Nesta and pull her closer to him, then kissed her forehead.

That was the end of that discussion for now. He understands what his mate is saying. He believes her and he knows all her explanation and reasonings are right. Doesn’t mean he likes it though. He just pushed that feeling back and away. Oh, he trusts his mate alright, he doesn’t trust Eris though. And if that bastard hurts her in any way? High Lord or not, he will make him pay.

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The next day, Elain and Nesta accompanied Feyre to Astrid’s Boutique so she could have her measurement taken, and decide on the type of design she’ll have custom made that she’ll wear on the Coronation Ball. While browsing thru the fabric, she took a glance at her older sister, and bit her lip. She wants to ask her something but she doesn’t know how to ask it without making it look like she’s being nosy.

Nesta however notices her youngest sister’s dilemma, she sighed and shift all her attention to her. “Go ahead, tell me. I don’t have to have the power to read mind to know you have something you want to ask.”

“Well, I was just curious…” Feyre stalled a little bit, still not sure how to ask her question. “…will you wear what Eris gave you?” The question made Elain look at them, wondering what Nesta plans to do as well.

“I wouldn’t wear it if it would make Cassian uncomfortable. No matter how expensive or stunning it will look on me. It wouldn’t be worth it.” Nesta answered with conviction. It’s true, she doesn’t care what she has to wear, if it’s something that will bother her mate, then it’s something she would rather not wear. She turns her attention back to the fabrics she was holding, and sighed. “To be honest, I don’t really get why Eris had to give me that dress. I mean we have become friends, yes! But we never really get to that point of exchanging expensive gifts. We may have given each other books that we think the other would like, true.” Feyre raised her brow at this, she thought that exchanging-book-recommendations is something her older sister don’t usually do, and she just do it with someone whom she’ll have time to discuss that book with after. So that means, Eris and her older sister really is getting along. “Believe me, the note is something I would expect from him. But that gift surprises me as much as it surprises you.” She was looking really confused as she pointed it out to her sisters. And Feyre felt her honesty and confusion radiating from her sister, she believes her.

“Uhmm…Well.” Elain speaks quietly which made both of her sister look at her expectantly. She felt conscious but she continued speaking nonetheless. These are just her sisters anyway. “Nesta, do you remember the last day of your Emissary assignment in Autumn about months back? The one where we had lunch out with Lady Isabella, Eris and Lucien’s mom?”

Nesta nods at this, remembering that day. She remembers planning of leaving the court early that day, and not make so much out of her last working day there. But the Lady will have none of it. She has come to get close to Elain and Nesta. She said they both remind her of her lost sisters. So, she took them all to one of her favorite restaurants in Autumn before she leaves.

“Remember after our lunch, we went to one of the boutiques to check on the dress she had custom made. You were actually looking at that specific dress in there. You were so focused admiring the bead works and the design. Lady Isabella asked you if you wanted to try it on?” Elain tells the story, trying to see if her sister can recall the dress.

Nesta tilted her head, “Oh….oh, was that “that” dress? I haven’t taken it out of the box yet so I didn’t really remember.”

“Yup, that was it! The color looks good on you, and you weren’t even wearing it yet. You we’re just holding it. She offers to buy it for you as a departing gift, but..” Elain trailed off, but Nesta finishes her story.

“But I gracefully refused. Said I don’t have any occasion to wear it, and its too luxurious to wear on Emissary works.” She remembers it now. That dress was absolutely divine. She did imagine herself wearing it on some special occasion with her mate. The crimson hue reminds her of Cassian’s siphon, and the intricate design reminds her of the swirling tribal inked tattooed on her mate’s chest and shoulder. She was actually thinking of buying it, but when the Lady of Autumn offered to do so for her, she became reluctant. She doesn’t want someone to buy it for her, she’s not used to that. At the same time, she doesn’t want to buy it for herself, when the Lady already offers. She didn’t want to offend her or anything. So, she just let it go.

Feyre meanwhile was looking in between her sisters while they were sharing that story. She was glad that they are all getting along really well now. They have gone through a lot together and separately. But on moments like this she wished she was there too. So, she just sighed, but it was audible and both her sisters looked at her. They both gave her comforting smile; Elain squeezed her hands then turn to Nesta.

“So anyway, I really think that giving you that dress is not really all thanks to Eris. His mom probably has a lot to do about it as well. So, I wouldn’t really think much of it.” Elain gave them both a wink.

That finished of that conversation. They become engross on choosing fabrics and designs again. In fact, Nesta decided to have her measurement taken for herself to wear to that coming weekend, as well.

After that, they went to Nesta and Cassian’s place to have some homemade tea. It was always much more relaxing talking and spending time together when they are in one of their places instead of outside. They were enjoying the tea when Feyre noticed the gift box from Eris at the corner of their living area.

“Will you at least try it?” Feyre nods towards the box and asked her sister with puppy dog eyes. Elain agreed on her youngest sister, and was clapping her hands with excitement. “Please….” She joins the pleading look with wide grin towards the oldest Archeron.

Nesta was caught of guard at this, she was about to sip on her cup when she saw both her sisters looks. They were both excited, you would think she’ll give both of them some surprise presents. She rolled her eyes, put down her cup gently, stood up from her seat and pick up the box. She went straight upstairs to their bedroom to change without even looking back at her sisters. She wasn’t even at the top of the stairs yet when she heard both of her sisters giggling and squealing. She can’t help but smile at this. And truth be told, she’s actually pretty excited to try the dress on as well.

Tag: @sjm-things @moonbeammadness @maastrash @typicalmidnightsoul @awesomelena555 @wannawriteyouabook

#nessian #nesta archeron #cassian #acotar #nessianfanfiction #eris and nesta friendship fic #myfansidefanfic

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icharchivist · 3 years

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first: WAHHHHHHHHH 😭😭😭 I got so emotional!!! so emotional!!!! so much that I can’t even do this first second pattern bc I have SO MANY thoughts!!!!!!! I’m writing this in my notes instead of straight into the askbox so u know it’s serious business™

ok so debut night!!! I was like ahah yeah it’s a tragedy whatever it’ll be fun to start out with and then the voice acting was SO good that it knocked me out of the park and I almost cried haha. it’s crazy how good the voice acting in a3 is like I love how the dialogue and voice acting works well together bc like it’s limited but so effective!! u can so very clearly see and understand the style they’re going for. especially like tsumugi’s death scene... the Talent jumped out it really did... uh and ok so. I think I may be a littleeee confused abt the play bc I had always interpreted tasukus last lines as raphael to be like abt his being secretly in love with michael. but now that I’m actually reading the line that’s like oh don’t fall for a human it only ends in misery I know that all too well or whatever... ig the implication is that raphael was in love with another human / the same lady michael was in love with in the play. side note I had to go back and edit the proper names in instead of tasuku and tsumugi lol... but speaking of!! speaking of the voice acting and the play itself I 1) love how blatantly obvious it is when tsumugi goes for that grander, tasuku like style of delivery!! like u could just so easily feel the difference it was wild... and 2) tsuzuru is once again spot on with his writing, lol... I felt that like raphaels inability to save or help michael really parallels how tasuku feels abt tsumugi so well, and it’s wonderful that they r able to resolve things and tasuku can properly compliment him on his acting where the angels fail to do so. it’s very good. and I think the play rly highlights (for me at least) that like. to tasuku, it was tsumugi who was sort of an unreachable existence. like were he to idolize and respect someone’s acting, it would be tsumugi. and I think that like caring carries over into their roles really well, because I think in michael’s love for a human tasuku sees like... tsumugi’s style of acting. the heart that he’d lost while within the god troupe. mb I’m losing my mind a little but ah. the play rly works with their relationship so well!! im very excited to see the other winter ppl get main roles tho—same for all the troupes!!! now this ask is too long so I’ll have to do another part lol

going to start off this second part of the ask abt hisoka bc oh my GOD. hisoka. like I was just thinking “hm where r the winter troupe cgs anyways” and then BAM. hisoka CRYING???? especially since he doesn’t seem that emotional it was a really hard hit!!! and who tf is august.... ok well actually theory time!! skipping ahead to the end theres that note that like mentions December and April and. not to expose my friend but very many years ago (a couple years before a3 was launched, at the very least) she wrote this story where there were like 12 orphan assassins and they were all named after months. I remember the main dude was named dec lol. coupled with my “hisoka is capable of murder” bit? listen.... I’m not saying anything but I’m also not not saying anything if u feel me. also I feel like assassin / thief with mysterious background is a common trope!! that was silver from the pokémon adventures manga too... why is this my reference point lmao. anyways I’m unclear if assassins would make it into a3 but like.... if the yakuza and supernatural stuff makes it in...

okay moving away from conspiracy theories and into emotions!!! the quotes from like EVERY mankai actor before the final production made me SO emo... and yay!!! they won!!!! (though admittedly I almost had a heart attack when no one clapped) but they won!!!! that ending cg!!!! and I adore how sakyo immediately goes after god troupe man (I know his name is reni I just don’t feel like calling him that) for the money lol it’s just so sakyo-like. also I love the lil mixed troupe interactions!! I found the game night ch so fun.... ahh, now I wanna reread that ch since it was so good lol

all in all I was super satisfied ahh!! I am SO excited to start up spring troupe again (HELLO character development!!! and chikage) and I’m even MORE excited to get thru all the act 1 events!!!! as a final note, is there any way to reread or replay the flair conversations? I didn’t want any spoilers for the plays while I was doing the practices for them so I kinda sped thru the first time ahah...

HELLO FRIEND IM SO HAPPY TO GET SUCH A LENGHTY ASK ABOUT WINTER IM LKDJFLKDJFLKFD Winter makes me feel shrimps emotions (i know the whole “shrimps can see more colors than humans can’t comprehend” thing has been disproved but i’m not letting go of that expression, i REALLY feel emotions humans can’t comprehend anymore and i’m going to make it everyone else’s problem)

1) First about the voice acting, rIGHT this is just so fascinating to me!!! I remember after act 2 i came back to reread the main act 1 chapter and i was so thrown out by how GOOD the voice acting was, especially for the first few troupes having to convince you they’re not comfortable or good at acting yet. Winter whole thing is that they’re more subtle and mature and you really feel that with their voice acting, Tsumugi’s voice especially knock it off the park anytime he’s on screen.

2) Second: what does it say about me that i’ve never, ever considered your reading a possibility because i was so set on “oh Raphael you’re in love with Michael sooooo bad you see it as a tragedy already because you can see him throw his life away” i didn’t even consider “maybe Raphael went through that too”. Though i guess if we’re going with that reading i can totally see “The Woman” they let themselves consumed by easily be a representation of acting or even more the God Troupe, with Raphael/Tasuku knowing to step away before it consumes him completely while Michael/Tsumugi, by his love and passion, pushed himself until he broke, which fits and it hurtsssss god Winter plays hits so hard.

3) Third: oh god yeah when Tsumugi goes for Tasuku’s acting it’s just. It makes me SO uncomfortable, i’ve experienced this scene like three times by now and the third time i was just “can i skip it i can’t go through this again i can’t Tsumugi i love you i can’t do this”. It doesn’t match the play at all and it just throws everyone off balance, and Tsumu you could have told theM YOU WANTED TO DO THAT.... god

4) Fourth: I LOVE YOUR READING SO MUCH I LOVE IT I LOVE IT YES YOU’RE RIGHT!!! Just as we follow Tsumugi let his passion consumes him until he breaks, Tasuku’s character arc really jumps out in Raphael, like, everything you say!!! The way Tasuku/Raphael knew how the feelings Tsumugi/Michael felt would hurt him on the long run but he didn’t know what to do about it until it was too late, the regrets and the way Raphael voices his frustrations.... Tasuku struggles to be honest without acting (Tasuku pls i love you) but having such a role really help him expressing all he feels about Tsumugi and i’m HHHH this is so good so so good!!! but yeah i also love that Tasuku finally manages to actually compliment Tsumugi naturally, that he understands he can’t let him destroys himself again and it’s just gnhhhhh Tasuku is so kind and considerate and i care about him so much....!!!

5) Fifth: “i’m losing my mind a little” winter mood, winter mood winter mood- (though every troupe’s mood tbh but Winter is gnhhhhh kdhd hdhjf??? you feel me) (i am BIASED i can’t help it TwT) but yeaH i’m looking forward to see how you react to the others plays because the roller coaster juST BEGUN!!!

Onto part 2... Winter Troupe Chapter Feels... 2!

6) Sixth: DLFJDFKLDF HISOKAAAAAAAAAA I LOVE HIM SO MUCHHHHH. Hisoka crying fucked me up so bad!! so so bad!! Like on my first read i didn’t know what to think of him as he starts out very apathic to his troupe and then the more it goes on the more you can feel he starts to open up and i’m soft for this sort of slow burn, but then this whole scene happened and it HIT ME IN THE FACE, he was crying, i was crying, we were all crying, the Unopening Door opened a flood of emotions i can’t cope with. He sounds SO VULNERABLE during that scene and i know all of the Winter Troupe united on “taking care of him” but that’s really the moment i went “i care you and i will keep taking care of you” and look at me now. Thanks funky little scene for ruining my life. I’m glad you liked it i’m aldhjflkjdfkd Hisokaaaaa.....

7) Seventh: I am not commenting on the theory but 👀 that’s so highly specific your friend has a galaxy brain i love it. and i love the idea of “well we have yakuza and supernatural entity what’s an assassin adding himself to it” dLKFJDLKF i know everyone in Mankai calls Izumi out everytime someone joins but that’d be peak. I’m not going further about what December and August and April are all about but i love this plotline sO much, the few mentions of August when Hisoka regained his memories for a minute still haunts me, the guilt he seems to feel and this pain i’m just... godddd such a good set up. I love this plotline.

8) Eigth: EMOTIONS!! Oh GOD YEAH THE ENDING WITH ALL THE OTHER ACTORS... I cried so hard it’s just. It really shows you it’s not just the culmination of the Winter chapter but of all the act 1 main plot and it really makes you feel how much of a journey you’ve been onto!! A3 is so good at showing you the growth of its characters that especially by the end of Winter you really saw how all of them grew in their respective chapters and how cozy they felt in their new home in the remaining chapters, and the fact this chap has those defining character arc’s lines really drive home “oh my god that was a journey” i love them sO MUCH....

9) Ninth: wE WOOOON!!! They’re all so good i just. i’m gonna cry just thinking about it dlfdjlfk i know like, the game has so many content so you know it can’t end at the end of Winter but the suspense really was there. BUT YEAH LMAO I LOVE SAKYO DOING THAT IMMEDIATLY, man sure has the eyes on the prize and we love him for that. AND THE GAME NIGHT SCENE they are all sO CUTE and sWEET and they’re a family now and i’m hHHHHH i love a3 a normal healthy amount that isn’t just making me cry thinking about how all of them grew so close even through mixed troupes.

10) Tenth: I am SO happy you were satisfied with the plot so far!! I’m genuinely so happy that you decided to take that journey with us and that you shared all of this with me, and i’m so so happy you liked it!! There is still so much content and all of it is so worth it!

11) Eleventh: Yes!! The flair conversations are all readable on the Mini-Chat tab! So they’re easily accessible and they’re sorted in a way that’s easy to read so you can feel comfortable skipping the flairs if you want until you have seen the stories the flairs are all about. They’re all kinda set during the rehearsals (except for some crosstroupe conversation that wouldn’t make sense if they were like how the Summer Troupe talks with the Spring Troupe in their Flairs DKLFJDF but it’s okay what is a timeline anyway) so some of them are set pre-development and it’s wild to get back to them. I love rereading Flairs i get emotional everytime.

ANND That’s it for this ask! i had a blast reading through your thoughts and i’m so happy and excited!! i’ll send you the drive now so you can start digging through it whenever you feel like it :3c good luck grinding for act 2, meanwhile i hope you’ll have fun with all the act 1 events i compiled for you!!

(side note i need to update the drive too but it’s mostly act 2 content anyway, the only two act 1 things i need to update on it is Sakuya’s birthday card i think?? i think Itaru’s is already in act 2 so i’ll try to get around to it eventually but it’s so far away anyway) (edit: i forgot that the three cards i got for the latest revival are from act 1 DLKJFD okay so i’m missing three cards -)

The drive has backstages and event stories and it may be a lot and overwhelming ahah. Focus on the event stories for the plot and go back to the backstages whenever you feel like it, no need to read them at the same time, unless you want to in which case everything is set up for you :3c and there’s a file with cards that aren’t associated to events too so... lots of goodies hanging around. I’ll send it to you in DM ;O

Take care and thank you so much for all your thoughts! my inbox remains wide opened for any others thoughts you may have as you go further into it :3c

#ichafantalks a3 #i love the winter troupe SO MUCH it's unreal this ask made me cry i was just LDKJFDLK WINTER!!!!!!!#i love your thoughts so much thank you for all of it <33 #sonnets-of-beauty #ichareply #long post for ts

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bladekindeyewear · 4 years

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Bloggin’ thru new Homestuck^2 bonus, The Influencers part 2. Kinda got my gears ground during part 1, but that largely wasn’t this sideplot’s fault, so I should still be able to enjoy it.

Reminder, bonus update blogging is always light on detail because I don’t wanna spoil all the paid content, but I’ll give the gist of my reactions and go into anything plot or character related that helps understand the main story, as well as giving you a real top-down view of “what happens” so you know what it’s about and whether or not to invest in looking yourself. (And I don’t necessarily have to give you anything that isn’t main-plot-relevant.)

So where are they going to follow the main party? They shouldn’t need to record the funeral I’d assume, because that already would have been televised (and awful for Jane’s PR)... *click*

9/28/2020 - The Influencers, Part 2

TEACHER: Time’s a-ticking. TEACHER: The next plot point is yours to change, if you want it. Don’t you feel it calling to you?

Yeah, just hanging a lampshade on this whole parallel sideplot I guess.

> (==>)

Whatever it is, Imode feels it. A tiny string of relevance spooling out from their belly. They want to follow it.

That’s pretty Lighty and/or Seery. I’ve used that terminology to describe the pull of Light and its “relevance” connotations even since the only fanfic I’ve ever written, back in 2011 during Homestuck’s run, and it’s obvious enough terminology that I think Rose later mentioned it somewhere like in the Epilogues. Are these three kids perhaps going to get a fourth, and become their own session by the end of this like Harry, Vrissy, Tavros and Yiffy might?

They can’t stop picturing their friend, Harry Anderson, arrested or tortured or worse. They’re not sure what there is to be done to stop this chain of events, but they’re sure as shit gonna find out.

(”They” is almost certainly referring to Imode here, not all three, since Imode uses they/them.)

Alright, self-aggrandizing used for good. Show off the sort of thing that Vriska could have accomplished if she actually used her talents for her team for once. (Besides, like, the similar thing she did just recently by making a scene.)

> (==>)

Imode is the first to choose pursuing this path over bootlicking, and the others are sure to follow.

> (==>)

Yup, Avril and Silas follow. (Had to be reminded of ALL of their names, it’s been months since their single named appearance.)

> (==>)

Crockercopters overhead but none taking note yet, just ominous setdressing

> (==>)

IMODE: lemme take a ⏱️ to 😮‍💨 before we figure out where to go next. AVRIL: wait don't you know? IMODE: Huh? AVRIL: we were following YOU this whole time.

Oh, that answers the first question I asked. They have NO clue where they’re going. Let’s see if they luck out and find the clock tower.

IMODE: You 👂 what he said about the next step 📞 to us, same as i did. Don't you feel it pulling at you?

Literal pull? Powers? Future player? --All baseless speculation of course.

SILAS: Woah are you seein’ this.

Vriska’s probably putting on her very public display now. (This is a bonus so I’m skipping lots of banter and arguing.)

> (==>)

Oh, they just saw John flying up to the clock tower in his outfit. And catching sight of him fly is rare celebrity gossip stuff so of course it’d stand out to them, apparently. (Only one of them is athletic apparently, the other two are groaning at the prospect of more running.)

> (==>)

Avril always enjoys running, but there’s something else thumping along to the rhythm of the thuds of his feet and beat of his heart. He’d thought Imode was nuts for feeling it just a minute prior, but now he’s realized he isn’t deadweight, that he hasn’t fucked up someone’s life irrevocably, and it pushes him faster and faster as he tears ass toward the belltower.

(Did we know Avril was he/him before this? Probably but if so I forgot.)

Okay, since we’re getting glimpses into each of their headspaces narratively that BOTH have had some oblique aspect references, I have to at least OPERATE on a guessy assumption that there’s a sort of classpect-for-each-of-them thing going here.

I’ve quoted both those whole paragraphs here... so what do I see? This is going to be a bit tougher because I don’t care as much to remember these characters...

Imode had some Lighty-or-Seery language, and then could not stop picturing bad things happening to Harry, wanting to avert that chain of events. So something of a Seer or Mage would make sense. But given how easily Lighty stuff and the Understanding classes (or at least what we think those are) can be conflated, Mage of Light seems a bit of a premature jump. Heck, I’m only saying Mage because a Seer of Light already occupies a starring role, and because her first act on that feeling was to jump after it herself and tell the others:

IMODE: Stay here and 👢👅 your way into fame if that's what you really want. IMODE: I’m ✈️. Follow me if you’re not 🐔💩.

--leading by example rather than directing the others into battle. Only half-caring if they followed, willing to pursue it herself if necessary. So, potentially more “Active”.

As for Avril... the word “heart” is mentioned there, sure, but the full context is “there’s something else thumping along to the rhythm of the thuds of his feet and beat of his heart”. I’m inclined to think that the rhythm/beat references, especially the even footsteps and heartbeats hitting like a metronome, might be more tied to Time? But if so, I don’t see anything class-related. (Could also be Blood, and him thinking of what he owes in the last sentences could be reinforcing that? Big question marks for now.)

> (==>)

Door to the belltower’s locked. The kids figure John’s forgotten that his son can’t fly.

AVRIL: this is it, this is the thing we can help with! #feelinit #vibes IMODE: OK I'm excited that you believe me now, but what are you gonna even do? IMODE: use your big all-star 💪 to break down the 🚪?

--so they think they can “resolve a missing plot point” by getting the way into the clock tower open? Is this going to be a theme or running joke of the Influencers sideplot, showing plotholes resolved in bonus content like how we finally saw how Gamzee’s body was relocated last time? When I was explicitly mad about that? (This seems like a much smaller one though.)

Apparently in HS^2 proper they remarked that the door SHOULD be locked, but Vriska just opened it anyway and wasn’t surprised it was unlocked, which she would’ve ascribed to her luck -- how the universe just makes way for her. (And we’re literally seeing HOW the “universe” “made way” for her this way, through these Influencer kids. Even though Vriska could have broken down the door in a second and it’s practically meaningless.)

> (==>)

Avril just has the key!

AVRIL: so like my photoshoots are like, #modernfashion #myworkout #urbexp IMODE: Yea, your 📸 are why we’re all in this mess. We know. Get to it. AVRIL: fair. ok well this is the urban exploration part. AVRIL: a lot of the public infrastructure buildings in the kingdom have the same weird, shitty deadbolts on them. AVRIL: its like they were mass-produced for ease of access or something. AVRIL: none of the deep crockergov stuff, but a lot of the kingdom maintenance buildings. AVRIL: so once you swipe one key, you got access to it all. AVRIL: that’s how i get a lot of my hard-to-get shots #tradesecrets #tellnoone

Hhhmmmmm. So what does this tell us about his potential role? Getting places you’re not supposed to is associated with the Thief, Rogue, Bard, and sometimes Knight classes... as well as the Time/Space aspects, or the Void and Breath aspects. A Thief or Rogue of Time could do the trick, and fit with the rhythm paragraph earlier... whereas Space doesn’t have the same rhythm associations even if it is “places” he’s getting into for these shots. And photography, snapshots still in time, is something Dave was also explicitly into. Plus, this exploit he’s showcasing is specifically for older buildings, playing into history/archaeology from an urban perspective.

So, Time is looking like a safer and safer bet for him.

> (==>)

lock click

> (==>)

long-hair swoop, cheer

SILAS: Yeah, I’m tickled a near-disproportionate amount by the unlockin’ of a door, so I’m inclined to believe you were onto somethin’.

Still no real hints about Silas, yet.

AVRIL: ok so. we did it, right? #missioncomplete AVRIL: feels a little anticlimactic #tbh IMODE: idk, I think so? whatever I was feeling doesn't seem so immediate anymore. IMODE: I wonder if-

Okay, that’s some near-confirmation that Imode was LITERALLY FEELING the plot or some such. We’ll probably end the Influencers sidestory eventually with at least solid GUESSES blatantly obvious for their potential Hero Roles or the like.

> (==>)

Ah, Vriska and the kids are coming-- and we get the Silas paragraph(s)! Silas is green-themed with green text, and a session with a Time player has a good chance of having a Space player too, so let’s see if...

Silas doesn’t know what being spotted by the other kids might mean, metaphysically or logistically or legally. She’s not particularly pressed by that sort of thing. But this is a day that’s come with more introspecting than she’s used to having to endure in a year, so she's ready to get moving before it becomes an issue.

As Harry Anderson, Vrissy, Vriska, and Tavros proceed to have this conversation, Silas pushes to catch up with Avril’s pace. She’s not sure where they’re headed, and has no clue what all this means for her. She knows the step she’s taken isn’t one she’ll be able to backtrack from, but she’ll figure that out tomorrow. For now, one foot in front of the other.

That...

I mean there’s a lot of talk of time-FRAMES, from a lazy perspective, but just-pushing-forward-in-the-here-and-now is reasonably Spacey? ...hm. I was excited for the Silas paragraph(s) but I don’t see any immediately-apparent pattern meant for us to discern classpect info here. Maybe a female Page example (since we could use one), propelled along by events without knowing what’s going on at first, too early in her journey to have taken more than her first step up the gradual incline of her long-term potential?

I really don’t know I guess.

Anyway, that’s the end of the bonus upd8! See ya in a while.

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #upd8 #Homestuck^2 #Avril Thorpe #Imode Kurita #silas p beauregard iii #spoiler #spoilers

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indecisive-v · 3 years

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NINJAMUFFIN DOING ANOTHER AMA ON TWITTER, HERE'S MORE SHIT FOR YA! keep in mind i'm just sharing the funkin related stuff, though i am including WAAAAY more than what i shared before 👍 go check out ninja's twitter profile for questions about stuff like ritz! questions in blue, answers in orange. if yall don't wanna read everything i MIGHT make a version of this post where i replace the answers with my own summaries of em (and if the questions are long, those too)

and here's a link to the ama tweet itself! dunno if it's still goin

Q: I figure the answer will be yes but do you have more plans to implement more guest appearances from people in the newgrounds community into FNF? Or are you all gunna focus on OG lore and stuff going forward

A: for guest appearances, I think we have always seen it as getting a healthy mix of both. PERSONALLY I'd like to lean towards having more OG stuff than guest stuff, BUT it's all a matter of what other boys think of that as well. I'm not the sole person working on game!

Q: Are you gonna release the full FNF game or are you gonna be releasing week after week? Like, are you gonna release week 8 or are we gonna wait some years until The Full Ass Game comes out?

A: Release plan for FNF right now is a few more updates or whatev to the 'demo' we have out right now, and then a long silence of probably no updates whatsoever until the full game is done (which will likely be a few years). That's partly why we made kickstarter for game.

Q: Hey so like, how much will Fnf cost after it's finished? And when will you ask the supporters what they want the game on?

A: It's all subject to change, but right now it prob gonna be standard 15-25$ lil steam indie game.

We will ask Kickstarter pledgers and whatnot what they want the game on SUPER close to when its released, to keep options open if we get onto anything like a console people want.

Q: 1. how was your day

2. are you releasing a week 8 song early like week 7, or are you goin full lockdown

A: I am doing GOOD today, and I think recently I've been good in general.

up to the mood, but so far we doing good about not having anything leak or whatev, so I think it'd be fun to have update come out with people not knowing what to expect at all. Build dat intrigue

Q: Will fnf ever get official plushies?? Seems like an untapped market

A: FNF plushies will prob happen some point, we have a lot of current merch stuff on our plates already though! (Mostly kickstarter type stuff, shirts, pins, posters, and all the physical OST stuff) Its a lot to sort out, but in time more and more stuff will happen. We r jus 4 boys!

Q: did you ever expect your game to blow up as it did? what was your first reaction to seeing it become super popular

A: FNF never had a humble moment, literally day 1 before the prototype even came out, the vid on twitter had like 5K likes overnight. Then when ludum dare version came out, it got 5K likes again, like it wasnt just a fluke. Was crazy, and def felt like somethin was different wit FNF

Q: Do you plan on getting other people to come in to help with the music? That seems like a lot of work to dump on one person, what with the erect mode and whatnot.

I guess the question could apply to all aspects of development. Will you be bringing on more people to help?

A: We definitely are getting help from other people. We are always keeping an eye on people for various different things. In terms of programming, already I've gotten 2 people (MtH and Geokureli) to help with certain Week 7 stuff (charting/polish, and loading stuff). Shit like dat

Q: Oh, also, will the Steam version be Workshop compatible? That'd really help streamline the process of downloading mods.

A: Steam version of FNF will likely NOT be Steam workshop compatible, because we want all the mods to NOT be spread out through different places. There WILL be modding support that is as streamlined as Steam workshop though. Mainly for non-steam versions of the game!

Q: Are there any chances that the game will have a physical release? Also any updates on a switch port? I remember one of you guys talking/joking about it.

A: Not impossible for FNF to get a physical release. We would want to see how far we could go with it though. I think it'd be super easy to do something wit people like LimitedRun games or whatev, but I think stuff like that can only go so far. I wanna see Funkin in mf Walmart!!!!!!

not that LimitedRun isn't going to be an option! Just we consider and pursue many different things! FNF release is years away, so we have time to think about everything. Whole mindset can be different just a few months from now.

Q: Out of curiosity, how are you dealing with all the popularity? It blew up so fast id barely be able to handle it if I was in your shoes.

A: The only way I've been able to handle it is having the other boys on the crew and being able to talk to them about all the overwhelmingness.

Part of it feels very lonesome, feels like NO ONE can come close to comprehending exactly how I'm feeling, except them. also other PALS!!!

Q: Do you own any of the bootleg FNF merchandise? Like any bootleg plushies or anything?

A: i dont, i genuinely think they r a waste of money, and I know any bootleg shit that gets made, we can prob go about and make it, and make it 100x cooler because we actually put effort into shit. bootleg shit just in it for the coin, so they aint gettin that from me

Q: How did you go about getting in contact with sr pelo for skid and pumps vocals?

A: Pelo i think was familiar and pals wit PhantomArcade a bit thru various Newgrounds things and collabs and whatnot.

pelo retweeted the first OG FNF posts first ever, and brought a LOT of attention to it. to pay him back, we put skid and pump in game! ask dave for more info prob

Q: what's the plan for having the full ass game open source if it's gonna cost money? couldn't people just download the source and compile the game for free?

A: when FNF is fully released, the full source code will be released as well.

the game will be DRM free so it will be way easier for people to redistribute the released/offical .exe instead of compiling it, so that's not the issue anyways. people will pay for things if they like it

Q: What are the chances of it getting on consoles like switch or Playstation, ps5 would definitely be my preferred way to play

A: it'd be a matter of hiring someone to build out backend stuff for those specific consoles. someone who knows their way around all the wacky code stuff, AND knows console hardware stuff. Then its just a matter of hittin up those console manufacturers (Sony, Microsoft, or Nintendo)

the CLOSEST one is SWITCH. pretty much all of that backend is already made, so it just a matter of gettin all that access and shit.

i think in any case though, there's a lot of NDA stuff required, i dunno how much we'd be able to talk about it even IF we get that stuf sorted

Q: any ideas of releasing it on epic store or another platform?

A: Right now, the only thing that is 100% confirmed and WILL happen is a Steam version, itchio version, and mobile versions on respective app stores. Other storefronts aren't out of the picture though, but we don't want to spread ourselves too thin with it.

Q: Will you continue using HaxeFlixel to make the rest of FNF?

A: yes, because it is what I'm the most technically proficient in, and generally is VERY flexible. just a matter of ME becoming a better coder. It's ALL open source, so if I need something done a certain way, either I can do it, or we can hire someone to do it.

Q: have you seen game theory's videos on your game yet and if so, what do you think about them? (not talking about his predictions because i dont want spoilers. i like mystery)

A: it is always good silly fun to watch the Game Theory vids about Funkin with some pals, and see what matpat thinks of the game. i lov the vids, but wish he used my face less! Or at least used a cuter pic of me like this one!!

Q: Ok so: What does the future of FNF look like to you?

A: future of FNF is a rhythm game that not only exceeds every expectation that people have of it, but subverts most expectations and conventions as well.

Q: Do you plan on retouching on older weeks once the game is fully out? Like reanimating sprites, redoing some charting, updating the background, etc

A: retouching and probably overhauling certain aspects is almost definitely gonna happen. Everything is fluid and can be changed (and should be changed when necessary). i dont think anything should be too attached to, especially this early on in development

Q: I honestly do not care if the answer to this is vague as hell to keep surprises and shit lol but… Since Week 7 was the closest we’ll get to a playable girlfriend (still bf controlling tho), do you have plans to make girlfriend playable in spin-off things or just freeplay?

A: wouldnt be out of the picture for a playable GF, i don't think we've had some hard thing AGAINST it. just a matter of what we want out of the game, and what sort of story or whatev we could do with that concept

Q: How do BF and GF manage to meet famous newgrounds characters (such as pico, tankman and the others to come) like is this all in one universe/ timeline or are they being brought in?

A: i think they are all just there existing. i think there's a lot of wacky things in other media that try to justify crossovers, like MULTIVERSE bullshit or TIMELINE shit, but i dunno, its like subspace emissary. Captain Falcon and Olimar from Pikmin just hang out. Shit like dat

disclaimer that all lore shit is in phantomarcade head pretty much and maybe there is wacky dimensions or somethin

Q: Will the game have dlc?

A: its not too unlikely that we'd have expansions of some sort, but i mean right now we plan on packing in as much as we can into base game, and trying to make that as pure as possible.

if there is ANY dlc, i would personally want it to be 100% free updates

Q: How did you meet Phantom Arcade, Kawai Sprite, and EvilSker? And what do you think about the community and its controversies?

A: me and phantomarcade been fukin around NG for years so years and years ago we naturally crossed paths and became pals

about 2 years ago i found kawaisprites music on NG, and started talkin wit him, made Ritz wit him and we fell in lov

and evilsk8r i met cuz of FNF!!!

quik elaborate on evilsk8r, wanted artist for gamejam FNF was for (ludum dare), and OG person i asked wasnt available, so he referred me to evilsk8r, who I have never met or talked to before ever.

#friday night funkin #fnf #fridaynightfunkin

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