#anyways yeah... i'm back in full SH mode :')

[sherlock-is-ace]

Just know that, once again, I'm not normal about Sherlock Holmes. The hyperfixiation has been rekindled.

[strange-spaghetti]

An update. Monday: Documentary shoot was absolutely wonderful. I felt so happy & loved working with the crew. The director is really championing me to become a drone operator for films so that is really endearing. She's been great to me. Meeting Richard Bellia (& sharing an airbnb haha) was fantastic. I love his work immensely. I was going through one of his books at the coffee table & I saw a Fad Gadget photo I've never seen before & I kind of went "oh! Fad Gadget!" & in his very french accent he tells me how that's never the response he gets when people go through his work. That morning breakfast was so lovely. Really beautiful. & the eclipse was gorgeous too. So much fun & Bellia photographed me; that was a trip. & there's a good chance those cameras that he photographed me with were the same he photographed so many bands & artists I love. F*cking killer.

Friday: I saw a Depeche Mode cover band. I had a lot of fun singing & dancing. Two middle-aged guys were all over me, but it's whatever I got a lot of attention from a lot of people, even the band... Which. God, such a bummer. The dude who does Martin's part is this gorgeous 23 year old South African knock out; the hottest guy I've ever met with the most powerful eyes & statuesque physique. We were being cute after the show & I hit on him a bit. He touched me a bit too but because of my Massive weight gain (5 .lbs big deal, but yeah, my body issues are in full f*cking swing) but every time he went for my arm I kind of retracted back.. ei. (I am in fact getting off of lexipro now. Only 2.5 months but nah, dude my body is a huge part of my happiness & it's f*cking with my metabolism & leptin receptor. Still f*cking depressed too, so whatever dude. I'm done). But yeah, I could tell the dude wasn't that interested & probably just shmoozing for social sake. We did talk music slightly. He listens to prog metal & has a proggy band on the side. I said I don't listen to modern prog, but I do listen to classic prog. He says "You listen to Rush don't you?".... God, not again lmao. He says I'm the only girl he knows that listens to Rush... What's with Christians & Rush??... But yeah, sociability, just chummy flirtation (but f*ck, so f*cking hot)... The singer was chummy too & put me on a guest list for their next show, we've been talking on IG in which! I am doing their photos & videos for them!!! : ) Oh, & no chance with the knock out since he is Very in opposition of ALL my values SO.. I'm not doing that again. Sometimes there's just no way to coexist no matter how open minded you are. You get hurt sacrificing your sensibilities for the possibility of companion & partnership & these self-righteous guys can't meet you half way... but thank christ (haha) he's not interested or trying anything because Iiiii honestly would forsake Everything for his physicality... which is fitting for Depeche lmao. Anyway. Happy, still going through sh*t (traded my romantic disorder for an eating disorder 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻) but really progressing in life & with healing. About f*cking time, man. It Can Happen.

[neoloves]

— 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐝.

| 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 | You thought up a devious prank you could pull on your boyfriend, you would pretend to buy an expensive ass item from Gucci or Chanel and have him pay with his credit card.

| 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 | Kageyama Tobio and Kuroo Tetsurou

| 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬) | None

| 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝.𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 1.4k

| 𝐚𝐭𝐡.𝐭𝐱𝐭 | So I've been radio silent all this time.. but uh here 🤲 have Kags and Kuroo

[ Kageyama ] — 影山 飛雄

You were feeling devious, you woke up and chose violence. Looking beside you laid a sleeping Kageyama, you decided to give him a little heart attack this morning, grabbing your phone off the bed side table you started to ring up one of your friends. Was this a good idea? Maybe, but it's all harmless, is what you think anyways. Walking out of your shared bed room and headed for the kitchen, the person from the other side finally accepted the call.

"You up for a little prank this morning?" You asked, your lips tugging upwards, in a very scary smirk. "I can see your smirk from here Y/N, and of course, why not," Sugarwara answered, the tone he used was nothing but mischief. You briefly explained about the plan, he'll call you when you text him, pretending to be one of the staff from customer service asking for confirmation for the Gucci bag you ordered under Kageyama's credit card.

"Alright, well text when it's go time," He snickered, you knew you could count on him. "Alright thanks!" You said, hanging up after. Not long after, you can hear Kageyama's yawning from your bedroom, "Good morning," you greeted him, he flashes a small smile as he walks towards the island, standing across from you. "Good morning, I woke up and you weren't beside me.." he said. "Oh? You missed me already?" You decided to tease him a little. "No.." Kageyama answered, not very convincing.

After a bit more time passed you decided it was go time, texting Sugarwara 'It's game time 🤩🥳' the plan was on the move. Placing your phone back down, you waited for the phone call, Kageyama didn't suspect a thing. "Do you want pancakes or–" Kageyama's question was cut off by your phone ringing, "I'll answer this real quick okay?" You said, putting the phone call on speaker mode, definitely not suspicious.

Sugarwara put on his best 'Customer Service' voice, but he kept in mind that he was supposed to sound nothing like his actual voice. "Hello! This is Warasu Kai! I'd like to ask you about the confirmation for your order, the credit card's last four digits are 0323?" Sugawara was a great actor, you had to bite the inside of your cheek to prevent laughter from coming out as Kageyama eyes you suspiciously.

"Yes! That's correct," you answered, "Alright, that'll be $1810 for the Gucci Horsebit 1955 small shoulder bag," Sugawara said, Kageyama's eyes widen comically large. "Yes, thank you!" You ended the call, ready for whatever Kageyama was gonna say. But he stayed silent, you figured it was because of shock but he looked at you again.

"What?" You smiled being the little shit you are, "Last time I checked.. 0323 is the last digits of my credit card.." He said slowly, as if he's trying to convince himself that it's true, and it is. "Yup, I really wanted to buy that bag.." you said, eyeing his next moves. But he just closes his eyes, his hands gripping the sides of the table, inhales deeply and then exhales. "Alright," he said. "Alright..?" You tilted your head to the side, he opened his eyes to stare at you, his gaze softening. "Yeah, alright, you can buy that bag with my card, you deserve it love,"

You honestly didn't expect that kind of reaction from him, "You've been nothing but supportive of my volleyball career since high school, you've been there for me and took care of my stupidly stubborn self, so yes, it's alright for me to spoil you a bit.." he said, a faint blush dusting the apples of his cheeks. Your heart gets a little tug, he was so sincere with his words. "Actually, that was a prank.. Sugawara helped me out," you admitted.

Kageyama's eyes widened again, "F-For real? I.. I almost fainted from hearing the price," he let out a little chuckle, his knees unbuckled. "But, my point still stands, if you want that bag I'll get it for you," He regained his composure. "No need Kageyama, I'll be okay without that lousy bag," you waved your hand dismissively. Hopping off your chair to make your way to your boyfriend. Wrapping your arms around his waist, his hands automatically hugging you back.

"That was cute though, your little confession," You smiled at him, "And I meant it.." he softly smiled back at you.

[ Kuroo ] — 黒尾 鉄朗

Kuroo was currently in the washroom getting ready for bed when you decided to play with him for a bit, you called up your partner in crime (read: Hinata) and began scheming. Since Kuroo likes to spend a lot of time in the bathroom for god knows what, you had enough time to plot this prank of yours. You deemed yourself a genius and gave Hinata a virtual high-five, after 10 minutes, you hear the shower getting turned off.

You predict that he'll take another 5 minutes to dress up and such, "Alright Hinata, I'll message you when the prank is a go," You said, making sure your voice was low enough just in case Kuroo hears you.

"Alright! I'll be waiting! Hopefully this work-" You accidentally cut Hinata off as you heard the bathroom door opening, you don't know if it's the heater or is Kuroo looking really hot? You shake your head slightly, you can't get distracted now! You mentally prepare yourself, Kuroo's eyebrow lifts up as he gives you a questioning gaze.

"You alright?" He asked, you didn't notice how jittery you were being, not trusting your voice, you gave him a small nod. Kuroo seems to take that as a good enough answer and smiles at you. "Do you need the bathroom?" He asks again, "No, no need.. I just need to make a call," You said.

That must've gotten his attention, "Yeah? Go ahead baby,"

You narrowed your eyes at him before texting Hinata, 'He seems suspicious but call now! 🤩🤩' Not even a minute later, your phone started to buzz. Kuroo was now sitting at the edge of your bed, drying his hair with the towel that was draped over his shoulder. "Hello ma'am?" The voice over the phone (Hinata) greeted, "Yes hi! I just wanna ask about the Gucci sling bag that I ordered?" You managed to say without fucking it up.

"Oh alright! The $2000 one?" He asks, Kuroo looks over to you, his eyes widening a bit. "Yes, that one," you answered. "Well ma'am it's on the way, and the credit card last number that it's charged from is 0813 right?" He asks, knowing Hinata he was probably trying hard not to laugh.

"Yes yes," The next words was a blur to Kuroo as he wracked his brain for an explanation, 'Maybe she was mistaken?' he tried to reason with himself, "Hey Kuroo, you okay?" You asked, as the conversation with Hinata finished. "Yeah! I'm fine but.. I thought your credit card's last digits are 6282?" He asked, his fingers fiddling with the ends of the damp towel that now rests on his lap.

"Yeah, you see.. I thought you'd buy it for my birthday next week.." you lied, Kuroo on the other hand already had his present, it was the exact same bag that you were talking about and now he's getting charged double? "It's fine Y/N, I know how much you wanted that bag for your birthday, I'll let this one pass but ask me when you want to buy something. Especially if you're using my card alright?" He smiled.

You smiled back at him, but you couldn't keep up the facade as you started giggling, "Y/N? Did I say something wrong?" Kuroo asked, placing both of his hands on your shoulders. Your giggling fit erupted into full on laughing, you couldn't believe how nice your boyfriend was being. "Why're you laughing Y/N?"

Kuroo started chuckling himself, "Sorry, that was just really wholesome, this was a prank babe," You said, wiping an imaginary tear from your eye. Kuroo completely blanks out, "What?" He croaked out, you held up your hand onto his cheek, "I had Hinata's help with this prank," You said, "Oh that little sh–" You didn't let him finish his sentence as your jumped onto him, wrapping your arms around his neck, peppering his face with kisses, Kuroo holds you by your waist as he gives you a lazy smile.

"You don't have to get me anything for my birthday, maybe food but I'm fine with that!" You said, Kuroo shakes his head. "You deserve the best, so I'm getting you a present, whether you like it or not," He says.

"Alright then, let's get ready for bed?" You suggested, getting off of him. "Yeah, but I'm giving Hinata a piece of my mind tomorrow," He sighs.

[recurring-polynya]

I hoped you would reblog that! :3 A fic after Aizen arc, where Ichigo DOES NOT lose his powers, and seireitei is in full party mode. Someone asks where Rukia is. Renji's like "she went to get snacks". and Orihime, tipsy as hell, just blurts out "Of course you know where she is! You're so cute together!!" and everyone is either like "yeah true" or "WAIT SINCE WHEN?". aka the dorks get peer pressured into realizing they should date already By Everyone. Feat. Women's Society paparazzi.

Hey, so you know how always spend a ton of time on my really long fics and don’t post them until I’m all the way done so that I can make everything internally consistent, etc, etc? What would it look like, as your therapist would say, if I just wrote some nonsense and posted it? And if I feel like writing more chapters later, maybe I will? To post something with a 1/? Also, what if was Canon, Never Heard of Her? and also full of things that do absolutely do not belong in Soul Society (like potato salad?) What would that look like?

Anyway, here you go @unohanadaydreams. I’m sorry it took me so long to do this and also I also messed up your prompt a bunch (I figure that everyone knows how bad Renji has it for Rukia and wouldn’t rag him about it, so I switched ‘em), but I think I captured the spirit of it, along with the spirit of that filler episode where everyone makes movies.

Enough! Enough intro! Here it is!

Heroes of the Hueco Mundo Invasion – In Love!!

“HELLLLLLOOOOOOOOO, SQUAD 10!” Inoue Orihime yodeled, flinging herself into the courtyard, where a barbeque of epic proportions was gearing up.

“Orihime!” Matsumoto screamed.

“YO!” Kurosaki Ichigo announced, stumbling in behind her, arms raised victoriously. “What has two thumbs and just saved Soul Society?”

“This guy!” Orihime squealed, trying to point her thumbs at Ichigo as he also tried to point his thumbs at himself.

Ichigo squinted at the hands waving around his general vicinity. “How many thumbs do I have? Hey, hey, Ishida?! Did I grow any extra arms while I was fighting Aizen?”

Sado Yasutora suddenly plunged through the gate behind them panting and out of breath.

“Are you two drunk?” Captain Hitsugaya demanded.

“My new best friend Captain Doctor Unohana Retsu gave me the good stuff, because I am the Hero of Three Worlds, possibly Four,” Ichigo explained. 

“Painkillers,” Chad gasped. “He’s on a very high dose of painkillers. It’s…okay… I'm… keeping an eye on him. He’s still really fast, though.”

“What about Orihime?” Rukia demanded, from where she was trying to sculpt a bowl of potato salad into a diorama of herself defeating Rudabone. Or possibly Chappy. “She wasn’t even hurt.”

“She was very nervous about Kurosaki,” Uryuu explained, sauntering up next to Chad. “So Lieutenant Kotetsu gave her some of Captain Unohana’s home-brewed ginger beer, which was… allegedly non-alcoholic?”

“I feel so powerful right now!” Orihime chimed in. “Like my body is filled with thousands of dubstepping bees!”

“I literally cannot feel any part of my body, right now,” Ichigo chipped in, “but at least I didn’t lose my Soul Reaper powers while performing the Final Getsuga, like some sort of contrived plot hook.”

“Why is it called the Final Getsuga, then?” Orihime asked.

“Beats me!” Ichigo hooted.

“It’s because Europe had just released ‘The Final Countdown’ when I invented it, and that song slaps!” Isshin shouted from somewhere near the kegs.

“DAD!” Ichigo shouted. “Dad, I have something to tell you! Also, Rukia, you are like my other dad, if I had two dads!”

“I am not,” Rukia protested.

“Maybe Byakuya is like my other dad, then, which would make you my sister.”

“I am definitely not,” Byakuya protested. (Did you, gentle reader, think that Byakuya would not attend one of Squad 10’s infamous keggers on the occasion of Aizen’s defeat? You were incorrect. Byakuya is a great fan of Matsumoto’s guac.)

“Listen, Dads,” Ichigo insisted. “I defeated Aizen and I think that definitely means I should get to borrow the car on Saturday, but also, Orihime proposed to me and I said yes , we are now engaged to go to the movies the next weekend that we are back home. Which is why I need the car, you see.”

Orihime dabbed.

“My precious son, I am so proud of you!” Isshin announced, throwing his arms wide. “But you can take the bus to the movies like a normal teenager.”

“Way to go, Orihime!” Rukia congratulated, abandoning her potato salad to perform an elaborate handshake/high-five routine with Orihime.

“This is so exciiiiitiiiiiing!” Matsumoto wailed. 

Ise Nanao sidled up to Kusajishi Yachiru. “Madam President,” the Vice-President of the Shinigami Women’s Association intoned gravely. “Are you thinking what I am thinking?”

Hisagi Shuuhei sidled up to the other side of Kusajishi Yachiru. “Are you thinking about a special Seireitei Bulletin feature, presented in cooperation with the Shinigami Women’s Association–”

“–'Heroes of the Hueco Mundo Invasion – In Love!!’” Nanao and Hisagi chorused in unison.

Yachiru blinked. To be honest, she had mostly been thinking about the red bean dumplings she knew Captain Hitsugaya had hidden somewhere earlier, and had not been paying much attention to any of the goings-on up until this point. This may seem to stretch belief, but you have to understand, gentle reader, that this amount of shouting represented a pretty typical day at Squad 11.

Yachiru bounded up to the former ryouka. “Hey, Pencil!” she demanded. “Are you and Muscles dating?”

“Chad!” Ichigo yelped, grabbing at his own hair. “You sneaky person!”

“Uryuu!” Orihime gawped, clapping her hands over her cheeks. “You sly dog!”

“No,” Uryuu corrected stiffly.

“You are mistaken,” Chad added.

“He’s way out of my league,” they said at the same time.

There was a long silence.

Uryuu looked up at Chad out of the corner of his eye.

Chad looked down at Uryuu out of the corner of his eye.

Ichigo was making tiny, excited claps.

Orihime was bouncing.

“Doooooo iiiiiiiiittttttt,” Captain Kyouraku said out of the side of his mouth, pretending like nobody could tell it was him. Everybody could tell it was him.

Rukia straightened up to her full height. “Do it, you dorkuses. The Women’s Association will pay for it. If these two dummies can get their act together, you haven’t got any excuse.” She glanced over at Ichigo and Orihime, who were gazing longingly at one another, and promptly did a horrified double take. 

“Errr…” Uryuu waffled.

“I understand if you’re uncomfortable participating in a Soul Society-related activity,” Chad offered an easy way out.

Uryuu opened his mouth, looked at Chad, and closed it again slowly. “I’ll take their money and waste it frivolously. That is within my moral code.”

“YAYYYYY!” Orihime squealed. “Triple date! Can I be an honorary member of the Shinigami Women’s Association?”

“What do you mean, 'triple date’?” Rukia tried to interrupt.

“Yes,” Nanao proclaimed. “But it will be three separate dates, covered as a three-part series.”

“In the World of the Living,” Shuuhei broke in. “The readers are crazy-go-nuts for the World of the Living.”

“Who is the third couple?” Rukia pressed.

“Genius,” Nanao threw a finger gun at Shuuhei. “Matsumoto, you’ll do host segments? Pre- and post-date interviews and such?”

“Give me a clothing budget and you’ve got a deal” Matsumoto agreed.

“WHO! IS! THE! THIRD! COUPLE?!” Rukia demanded.

“You and Renji, obviously,” Orihime replied. “You two are sooooo cute together! I bet your readers would love that, wouldn’t they, Lieutenant Hisagi? If Rukia and Renji went on a date in the World of the Living? Rukia’s like a princess or something here, right?”

“They will go apeshit , Hisagi replied breathlessly. "You have to understand that Abarai is actual very well-known among the Bulletin readership for his incredibly popular column, 'Let’s Do Shikai!!’ This is essentially the Soul Society equivalent of David Beckham marrying Posh Spice.”

“I…. don’t know who that is,” Rukia stammered.

“How do you know who those people are?” Uryuu asked, perplexed.

“I read Living World newspapers,” Hisagi excused with a shrug.

“Rukia, do you have something to tell me?” Byakuya frowned.

“No!” Rukia yelped. “I’m not dating Renji! I have no interest in going on a date with Renji, even though he consistently moves Heaven and Earth for me and we have really similar taste in craft beers and he’s objectively, like, smoking hot. I refuse to go on a date with Renji. Don’t ask me any more questions.”

“Where is Renji, anyway?” Ichigo frowned. “I don’t hear him shouting, so he must not be here.”

“He went to go pick up a bunch of snacks for Matsumoto because he’s a sucker and I’m sure he stopped off to trade out his sunglasses for polarized ones because he says they’re better for late afternoon glare,” Rukia excused very quickly.

“Rukia,” Ichigo noted, suddenly sounding a lot more sober. “Listen to yourself.”

“Soooooooo cuuuuuuuuuuuute!” Orihime repeated, exaggerating her lip movements.

“She’s not wrong,” Uryuu pointed out.

Chad did Big Shrug Arms and nodded in agreement.

At this moment, the man in question strode into the courtyard, carrying several grocery bags and wearing a pair of polarized sunnies. “Hey, party people!” Renji greeted cheerfully, somehow managing to hold four overstuffed grocery bags in one arm while he fished something out of one of them. “Why’s everyone so quiet?”

“Hey, Abarai, will you do me a big favor?” Hisagi asked innocently.

“Yeah, sure,” Renji agreed. He found whatever he was looking for. “Oi, Ruki-Ruki,” he called, tossing a small paper packet to Rukia. “They had those melon-flavored gummy salamanders you like when you get hammered.”

Rukia caught them easily, her cheeks flaming red.

“'Ruki-Ruki’?” Ichigo mouthed to her, making the most judgemental face he could manage under the influence of Unohana’s Special Sauce.

“So, what’s can I do you for, Shuuhei?” Renji asked, trying to find an empty spot to deposit his bags.

Shuuhei told him.

“Oh,” said Renji. He looked over at Rukia, who managed an awkward, sheepish half-smile as she clutched her candies. “Well, shit.”