#are still VERY much linked to their world and their soundtrack and their seiyuus and their exact canon designs and i dont want to change it

[burinazar]

i keep thinking 'i want to jailbreak the san-ken into original characters, it's so neat when other people do that with their favorites, when will i manage to do that?' and then immediately realizing 'no ebil you don't actually WANT to do that at ALL even a little bit. the sentiment you are feeling is just It Would Be Convenient if I Could Do That.'

[ininsulaavalonia]

SNK officially ended today and it's been a much more overwhelming experience than I would've thought. The manga left me feeling apathetic - it killed my interest in this series for what, a year? Two? So I had 0 reasons to think the anime would coax anything else out of me.

...

I was wrong. Admittedly, not like we're talking purely positive emotions here - I still have a lot of resentment, bitter regret and the itch to shake all the yens out of Isayama's pockets. But even so. I guess I should've known better - the writing has [had] its flaws. The voice acting and the music/score, tho? Never did. Not a one.

Add to that MAPPA's mindboggling dedication and passion for the craft and source material. I'm not perfectly happy with them for very biased reasons [they did away with a few of my RM crumbs], but no sane person could ever deny that they knocked it out of the fuckin park. They did all that while juggling 9620 other major franchises [and killing it there, too]. Ufotable will always be my #1, but MAPPA has come very close these past few years. Just hope everyone who worked on SNK post-changing hands gets to take pride in their work and maybe actually like.see their families or smth, lol.

But yeah - I will never be able to stress this enough: like at least 60% of the reason SNK had the ridiculous impact on me it did, of the reason it will be remembered as a classic/ legendary series, despite its flaws, of the reason precious few fictional works, irrespective of genre/medium will hope to ever even come close to the level of pure, raw exhilaration and emotional immersion SNK served on a pretty regular basis...was [and always will be] Sawano's masterpiece. Yamamoto has proven himself to be an A+ understudy/disciple 'Ashes on the Fire' will always slap], and ofc the likes of Linked Horizon, Ai Higuchi, Mika Kobayashi and all the other contributing artists deserve their fair share of laurels. But this score will always be Sawano's baby. I've a lot of comfort/fave soundtracks and the like; I can't remember one that did so much for its story, tho. Complemented its own brilliance this incandescently and profoundly.

And ofc the seiyuus were always excellent. That was not news to me. I'll always sing Kamiya's praises and keep Yui's future roles on my radar [and Marina almost stole the show here]. But most of my respect and admiration -sheer awe of, really- has to go to Yuki Kaji. He has such an incredible body of work, but I'd be shocked if people genuinely thought this, Eren's part,*wasn't* his defining performance. The role of a lifetime. It's not just his VA chops, either- the man's a pro in every sense of the word. Despite what Isayama put Eren through, despite that BS insult of an ending [painted in the most pathetic and pitiful colours, for all the world to see] that MAPPA sadly didn't alter [...made it worse, actually, what with Isayama's revisions/ additions and all] - he still gave it his all, still tried to see things through Eren's perspective to the bitter, mockable end. K I N G.

I wish I could heap this kinda praise on the writing, too. Sadly, this will stay one of my biggest frustrations and regrets re: any fictional work I've ever consumed. Isayama's expanding on the Armin-Eren heartfelt talk at the end made me feel, either successively or simultaneously. soft, emotional and mournful... and/or horrified, outraged and baffled by what his messaging seemed to make even more explicit/ double down on: that Eren, the protag the audience/readers got to see grow, the one they came to emotionally invest in? Was really just an 'idiot with too much power'. Ultra!Hitler stripped of his perceived alpha traits: just a lonely, pathetic, petulant, ridiculous *boy*. And while the 'I'll go to hell with you' spiel from Armin was one of the things that turned on the waterworks for me, I fully reject this attempt by the narrative to paint him in similar, bloodstained colours [or maybe I don't reject it - even if that were true, Armin will always be a hero to me. And sadly, my 2nd fave character after what Isayama did to Mikasa's character].

I'm just so fucking tired and angry by this nihilistic, cynical trend of backstabbing your audience/readers for the grave offence of their placing their trust in you. GOT did it first, ofc -and Isayama went 'hold my beer', apparently-. But the thing that makes this even more frustrating and painful - is that unlike those 2 fucking hacks, Isayama is an actual writer. A fantastic one / credit where credit is due [and funnier than he's usually given credit for, as the finale reminded me]. His skill isn't the issue - his cynicism / 'nothing is sacred' attitude is. The fact that he just yeets characters' dignities out the window can and has added so much heartache, tragedy and realism to his story and his overall style. But it also leads to this sort of betrayal.

I guess the underlying message of 'how to live with the horrible things you did for others/ for your own survival' is pretty hopeful. Armin's 'I felt like I was born for this moment', the ~it's the apparently pointless, little things, and the people you share them with that you have to hold on to and cherish ~ point has always, will always resonate with me. But I doubt it will ever be enough to get rid of all the bitterness [also: not even gonna get into Founder!Ymir, that shitty parallel to Mikasa, and that entire 'BECAUSE LOVE' clusterfuck. This isn't real life, Isayama. Fiction needs a why. YOU KNOW THIS]

Sigh. Anyway. In the end, even the fact that I felt this strongly, considering... is also a testament to the insane sort of impact this story is capable of. SNK -and RM [and Levi! The one good thing not even Isayama managed to taint -*...knock on wood*- That beautiful, awkward, baddest-of-the-baddies KING. The heart, soul and embodiment of the Scouting Legion-]- have meant so much to me - were a lifeline in the aftermath of the worst thing I've ever experienced. I'll never forget that sense of unique, intense exhilaration I felt while watching the first few episodes, a decade ago, in a Durham seminar room. Or the rollercoaster every feeling I'd ever had --and a buncha new ones- went on those following nights, as I binged the remaining episodes and the manga. Or RM. I wish things could have been different. But that doesn't mean I'll ever throw it out of my mental and emotional Hall of Fame. Thank God for fanfic.

That and. I *will* always carry that weight, I guess.

[rieshon]

Best of 2018

Holy shit was this a hard year to write this. There were a few standouts that were always going to be at the top of this list, but that second tier of "really good" shows was really dense this year, and some series I absolutely loved weren't able to make the cut. Here are the ones that did.

10: Mitsuboshi Colors ∥ Silver Link. ∥ Dir. Kawamura Tomoyuki: Even as someone who watches children's anime, I have to say Mitsuboshi Colors was the purest celebration of childhood this year. Not only does this series let you see some of the most adorable girls this side of Ichigo Mashimaro, it really invites you to see their world through their eyes, creating a nostalgic and genuinely wholesome experience not common for anime series featuring little girls. Of course, there is still plenty on offer for the lolicons in the audience: Yui is too pure angel, and Sacchan is one of the best bokes of the year. Just remember: in the end, we're all poop.

9: Zombie Land Saga ∥ MAPPA ∥ Dir. Sakai Munehisa: If you told me a year ago one of the best shows of the year would be about moe zombies, even an anime veteran like myself would have been surprised. Yet here we are, where a show about moe zombie idols is not only one of the best shows of the year, but one of the best idol anime I can remember seeing. For what seems like it is going to be a one trick pony of a gag anime, the character development in Zombie Land Saga is shockingly good, from Junko's discovery of her own aidoru-do to Lily's whole thing with being transgender... This show really throws its weight behind its characters and that's what makes the completely-in-earnest idol anime aspects of it work so well. Moe zombies made me cry real tears, and I love anime.

8: Darling in the Franxx ∥ A-1 Pictures & Trigger ∥ Dir. Nishigori Atsushi: This is probably the biggest 'event anime' of the year on this list and it certainly was an adventure. Darling in the Franxx is an epic robot anime very much in the vein of its great predecessors: genuine sci-fi, attempts to be deep, and of course the always relevant themes of "parents just don't understand" and "puberty is hard." The heroines are wonderful, of course, and the characters' rather significant growth over the course of the series is compelling. It's the kind of show you'd expect from someone who had their hands deep in Gurren Lagann. It also features some great hand-drawn(!) robot action--visually, it's overall one of the best shows of the year. But sorry 57th prime minister of Japan Shinzo Abe, this will not increase Japan's birth rate.

7: SSSS.GRIDMAN ∥ Trigger ∥ Dir. Amemiya Akira: I'm honestly not sure which of the Trigger robot shows I enjoyed more; Gridman might just be higher because it's more recent, but it's probably fair to say it's the more "fun" show, what with it being an Ultra series spinoff and everything. Even though it gets pretty dark and deep towards the end, the series is definitely imbued with the playful spirit of tokusatsu. Hiding behind that, though, is a thematically solid series boasting a couple of fantastic female leads in Akane and Rikka. You're never going to be able to get me to stop shipping it.

6: Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight ∥ Kinema Citrus ∥ Dir. Furukawa Tomohiro: If I was rating series on style alone, Revue Starlight would probably be my anime of the year on the basis of the digital stage lighting effects alone. This show is both a sharp-edged satire of the cut-throat world of Japanese womens' theater and a love letter to the spectacle of the stage. It seems fitting that it would be a protege of Ikuhara Kunihiko's who would take on this project; the show's style is certainly evocative of Ikuhara, and that sort of ostentatious presentation is also perfectly evocative of theater, which is itself an inherently larger-than-life endeavor. Yeah, it's pretentious as hell, but that just makes me like it more. Style aside, there is also a good yuri anime lurking in the background (Japanese womens' theater is gay as fuck so there had to be) and Hikari definitely earns the right to be called "this show's Homura." Lots of good lesbians in this show.

5: Hanebado! ∥ Lidenfilms ∥ Dir. Ezaki Shinpei: Sports anime are not really my thing--I have no interest in watching Slam Dunk, Tennis no Oujisama, or 'the basketball which Kuroko plays,' but even so, is Hanebado! one of the best sports anime ever made? It's hard for me to imagine a better-executed tale of self-discovery through athletic competition. This is certainly the only sports anime I've seen where the audience is made to root against the protagonist in the sport because we're rooting for her outside of it. It also features stellar animation for the badminton parts that really sells the idea of badminton being 'the world's fastest racquet sport." Erena was the best girl though, and she doesn't even play badminton.

4: Sora Yori mo Tooi Basho ∥ Madhouse ∥ Dir. Ishizuka Atsuko: When the end credits finally rolled on Yorimoi, the first words that came to mind were "what a journey." I don't know if I've watched another show that made me feel so much like I had truly gone 'there and back again' with the heroes. The treasure really is the friends we found along the way, and you accompany these friends from the very beginning to the very end of their journey to and from Antarctica, watching them mature and learn things about each other and themselves... The result is a series that is immensely satisfying in a way few others are. Hanada Jukki's usual brand of sentimental melodrama is pitch perfect for a show like this, and I'd be lying if I said this show didn't make me cry on like four or five completely seperate occasions. Please let Ishizuka Atsuko direct more anime.

3: Yagate Kimi ni Naru ∥ Troyca ∥ Dir. Katou Makoto: I went into detail about what makes Yagakimi so great just a couple months ago, but suffice it to say this show is my favorite yuri anime of all time. The characters' relationships are just so genuinely fascinating, especially in a genre where 'will they or won't they' is often as far as the dramatic tension goes. It is really a show about two girls discovering themselves through each other, and it's just so beautifully done, especially when accompanied by Ooshima Michiru's soundtrack. I liked this story so much that I downloaded the manga to read through, and I don't even read manga.

2: Violet Evergarden ∥ Kyoto Animation ∥ Dir. Ishidate Taichi: Figures that a show I was so certain would suck would end up here. Violet is the only show this year that made me cry even more than Yorimoi, and although it's a little hamfisted about it at times, I love the earnestness with which it pursues its themes about loss and love. Violet is not just the interloper who allows us to experience the various stories happening around this world, but also a fascinating character to watch in her own right as she tries to learn what exactly it means to love someone. It's sappy and sentimental as hell, which is why I love it. It also has probably my favorite soundtrack of the year, courtesy of Evan Call, which I've probably listened to over a dozen times.

1: Yurucamp ∥ C-Station ∥ Dir. Kyougoku Yoshiaki: Cute girls taking it easy? Hell yeah. There's nothing on this Earth more comfy than watching these girls go camping in the gorgeous Japanese countryside and just being the best of friends. Shimarin is the best loner who absolutely knows how to live life, and all I want is to ride scooters and eat instant noodles with her. It's a cute girl anime of the utmost quality, and the only reason I still have a will to live is because a second season has already been confirmed.

1. Yurucamp 2. Violet Evergarden 3. Yagate Kimi ni Naru 4. Sora Yori mo Tooi Basho 5. Hanebado! 6. Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight 7. SSSS.GRIDMAN 8. Darling in the Franxx 9. Zombie Land Saga 10. Mitsuboshi Colors

Honorable mentions... Hinamatsuri is probably the show I feel worst about not including, given its hilarity and its surprisingly well-done themes on poverty and homelessness, but someone had to be 11th. Asobi Asobase was another comedy I wanted to include, another one which was riotously hilarious at times and also included one of the cutest girls of the year, Olivia. As far as joji anime this year go, Aikatsu Friends exceeded all my expectations to finally be the Aikatsu series I stuck with, and Aine and Mio are the ultimate lesbian idols. I also have to give a shoutout to the Seishun Butayarou show, which is exactly the kind of 'snappy dialogue and adolescence problems' show that makes me love series like Oregairu and ef.

The awards go to...

Best Actress: Ueda Reina as Shinjou Akane, SSSS.GRIDMAN. I've been a big fan of Ueshama's since she turned up as the ridiculous Ajimi-sensei in Pripara. She can do some vocal gymnastics and has a great comedic delivery, but it was fantastic to hear her dramatic chops really leveraged to their full potential in Gridman. I think Ueda has one of the sexiest voices going in the business today, and some of the segments in Gridman where her character tries to seduce the male lead were truly yabai... And of course the more emotional segments with Rikka were also immensely impactful. (Credit to Miyamoto Yume for also doing some great work as Rikka in that series.)

(Honorable mention: Touyama Nao as Shima Rin in Yurucamp. Naobou has been one of my favorites for a long time now but her work as Rin is probably my top role of her's. Her aloof delivery is just so perfect for the character and her voice makes the show even more comfy than it already was. It's like a voice you want to hug.)

Best Actor: Miyano Mamoru as the manager from the moe zombie show I guess. I give up on doing the men every year. Kono baka zombi.

Newcomer Seiyuu of the Year: Shiraishi Haruka. Behind pure acting ability, versatility must be the most desirous trait in a voice actor, and it really feels like Shiraishi can do it all. She's had a couple major roles before this year: Motoba Kirie in the Umaru series, and Ruri in Anhapi, but her three main roles this past year really highlight the breadth of her abilities. She was the cool and collected Asirpa in Golden Kamuy, the impudent loli Misha in Uchi no Meido ga Uzasugiru, and the sexy tsundere Kana in Animayell... Yeah, that's some diversity in performances. It seems like I'm seeing this girl's name pop up everywhere recently and it's easy to see why: she seems to be able to excel in almost any role. She has two more major parts lined up for later this year, and I'm excited to see what she can do yet.

(Honorable mention: Hondo Kaede. Man, it felt like this girl was everywhere this year. Wikipedia counts her as having had no less than eight major roles, and that's following on from a 2017 where she had three leading roles. She certainly has a flair for the dramatic: probably my favorite role of hers was as Kanami in Toji no Miko; in a show where the animation didn't often keep up with the demands of the story, strong voice acting from Hondo and her leading partner Oonishi Saori really helped carry the show. I also really enjoyed her as Kohaku in Irozuku Sekai no Ashita Kara... She doesn't get the award, though, because most of her major roles so far have tended to sound the same. I'd really like to hear her branch out beyond her standard voice.)