#as worthy of love if not more so bc they're so proud of each other and never stopped thinking abt each other n hoping tht they were well

[bylertruther]

hello by adele aka a mike pov byler song in an au where things don't go well and they become estranged. mike moves to california bc his company has a job opening there and he could use a fresh start as well as the bigger paycheck, but also because it maybe possibly reminds him of someone he hasn't talked to in ages, but whose art still hangs on his walls and whose voice still rings in his head whenever he's being too hard on himself or being irrational. he's a few wine glasses in, just sitting on his balcony, when he dials a number he knows by heart still, not expecting it to still be will's or to even get through to anyone at all, but as fate would have it..... an achingly familiar deep voice answers and well . Well

[warren-keplers-funk-band]

i've had bewitched, bothered and bewildered stuck in my head ever since the episode titles came out... and thinking about this song in relation to buck and buddie is. kind of driving me insane

"men are not a new sensation," in relation to buck's bisexuality?

"i'm wild again, beguiled again/ a simpering, whimpering child again," something something buck retreating to his younger self's habits, naive, reckless, desperate. maybe acknowledging his growth

"lost my heart, but what of it/ he is cold i agree/ he can laugh, but i love it/ although the laugh's on me," tell me this doesn't read like buck being jealous of marisol, feeling his love is unrequited, appreciating eddie and eddie's happiness from afar but not feeling worthy of him

"i'll sing to him, each spring to him/ and long for the day when i'll cling to him," this kind of speaks to me of buck's self-sacrificial nature, how he wants to be needed, wants to be used, how his love language to eddie is acts of service... but then like. also allowing himself to want things

"he's a fool," they're both oblivious soo

"i'm in love and don't i show it," you certainly do, babes. in fact you've done nothing but show it since your second episode together

"i've sinned a lot," this accompanied by the "i can be oversexed again," seems very buck 1.0-specific to me. again maybe he's retreating? or acknowledging his growth? especially since his old player tendencies were literally brought up in 7x01. by himself. which eddie immediately amended by saying that he's not like that anymore. idk, it just feels relevant

"and worship the trousers that cling to him," ok let's be real, not to be a simp on main, but we've all seen ryan guzman's legs. also that man is caked up

"when he talks, he is seeking/ words to get off his chest," now THIS. this means a lot to me. i'm already so crazy insane about eddie slowly opening up and being more vulnerable, especially with buck. and ryan and oliver have both confirmed that buck and eddie going to be a lot more open with each other and lean on each other this season. eddie's not great with words, but he's slowly starting to be able to ask buck for help with chris directly, tells him his problems... and i think buck sees that, and is really proud of him for it

"vexed again, perplexed again," and "burned a lot, but learned a lot," both kind of feel to me like references to buck's (and eddie's honestly) history with dating, how everyone leaves him, dazed and confused, not knowing what he did wrong.. but again! i think we've seen a lot of growth with buck in this respect. like, he's learning not to settle. i got the impression that he broke things off with natalia not the other way around, which is a breakthrough for him honestly.

the song has sort of a bittersweet ending honestly, which i think might mean we'll get some angst. like maybe buck and eddie will. encounter some problems in their relationship, or eddie rejects buck or something. obviously that's wild spec but like let me live??

i want to clarify i'm not delulu i don't think the 100th episode will be super buck-centric despite being called 'buck, bothered and bewildered' considering precedent with 'buck, actually' (even though i personally wouldn't mind that, he's my blorb) i was just listening to the song bc it's on my writing playlist and had many thoughts and feelings. feel free to ignore

[desertdragon]

Some hcs abt Vaste & Kids not just her own kids but also in general:

- Loves kids but is nervous about being worthy to set a good example for them given her past and position doing awful things

- Is protective of them regardless both emotionally and physically, no one is allowed to harm or verbally abuse them in front of her and if she hears abt it...you're Gone bye

- Will go out of her way to talk to them as equals not as if they're helpless or below her for being children, though she still understands there's somethings you shouldn't tell or are delicate to word when talking to them abt serious topics

- Shes absolutely the one where you can't leave her around an abused kid or a kid having a bad time because she's already treating them like her own and trying to cheer them up; me and my friends joke she has like endless kids because of this, she's the mom friend

- Is not afraid to look and be silly around them and considers being too proud to do so dumb and stubborn and egocentric

- Under no circumstances does she want any child to go through what she has or worse and will actively make decisions to keep the burdens adults should have from them as much as possible, though unfortunately the way the world is she can't always be successful

- Regrets and resents the traditions she went along with when living with her tribe as a child because no child (or anyone but especially kids) should have to kill, especially kill in the context of murder making them "grown up" as part of a test

- Her already struggling interpersonal skills even among her peers after a lifetime of not being treated like a person carries over to kids too, it can be awkward to read their emotions or know exactly what to say but she's fucking Trying she's trying so hard

- Along this line of thought she adores Ryne and Gaia and def supports them being baby lesbians who have to figure everything out not just about themselves but each other; was the one to give Thancred a stern lecture about how he treated Ryne initially bc it def pissed her off, by the time she leaves The First she genuinely wishes the best for those girls

- Kids like candy right? = her line of thinking spending a Lot to have on herself but also to give out in context of Point Four and for her own kids they love getting more sweets than usual when Yugiri's not looking

- Her kids get so many piggyback rides around the house and yard, she doesn't shy away from being a hands on parent at all; partially spured on to do this because of the lack of it during her childhood- in the same line of thinking she's very liberal about telling her kids she loves them because she never heard it (as much) from her parents

- When each of her kids were born Yugiri had to calm and reassure her over things like "No you're not horrible because you changed a diaper wrong here let me show you please don't cry" etc. and she's still a little embarrassed about it

Edit: Yes shes the one accidentally embarrassing her kids with stories of them being little when they're teenagers trying to date and they look at her mid rambling like 👀💦😰lmao

[wolf-skins]

evens for that talk abt meme except if they're gross :((

Alrighty!

I’d answer two but I feel like I’ve done that story 10 times and it’s tiring to try to explain it.

4. Talk about the thing you regret most so far.I mean, I have so many so I can’t write a story for this, so I’ll go all emo and say my existence.

6. Talk about the worst birthday you've had.Honestly don’t know. Never did anything big for my birthdays except once, and that was a really fun night. Otherwise all I’ve done mostly is go to the movies.

8. Talk about the thing you are most proud of.When I was like...... 10 or 11, I wrote a 47 chapter book on flying unicorns. It was partially plagiarized from a friend and some of the chapters were a single page long (it was all handwritten tho okay), but it was my first real foray into writing so nice.

10.Talk about the biggest fight you've ever had.lmao okay so there was a ton bc Abuse and a lot of times I didn’t fight back but my proudest moment (and a turning point) was when I fucking took no shit and just didn’t care. Not a big fight at all compared to pretty much all of them but iconic. So my abuser and I had a stupid thing where we both got our own separate boxes of cereal (yes, I know, but he stole everything from me) and this way we’d both have our own thing that no one would steal or eat all of it on the other.

Needless to say, my abuser owned everything, in his opinion, so he was eating a bowl of my cereal, and it just fucking pissed me right the fuck off. I think I said something, and naturally he just probably told me in one way or another to fuck off, so I walked straight up to him and flipped the bowl of cereal on him. It was hilarious. He, of course, responded as always, and came up to me to punch me, but I actually dodged and he only grazed the top right of my head. I was laughing so hard. My mom sent him up to his room and I had to clean up the mess but it was gr8. Fucker. That’s what happens after enough of it, you just aren’t afraid of the fuckery anymore. 

I love the revenge, so good, so sweet.

12.Talk about the worst dream you've ever had.Shit I’ve had so many, but this one’s kinda weird but has actually like Scarred me. When I was a really young kid, that ALF (I never watched it but like my dad likes it or something) se/xu/all/y ass/aul/ted me and he just looks fucked and creepy and disturbing and I CAN”T STAND THESIGHT OF THW|AT FUCKING CREEPY PUPPET FUCKIGN THING it’s disturbing ok

14.Talk about a vacation.Once, in Florida, my abuser and I were running around (we reeeeally young, like I had to be.... god idk 8 or younger) trying to catch geckos bc they’re cute and fucking fast as hell. My dad caught us one SOMEHOW and we put it in a jar (no lid) and showed all the old people around (bc we’d stay at my grandparents’ little rented house which was like an Old People Retirement neighbourhood) and then we released it and yeah that was cool. Unfortunately abuser was there and he marrs literally every nice memory I possibly could have lmao.

16.Talk about the best party you've ever been to.lmao I honestly don’t know?? I don’t go to parties really unless like.... small ones or birthday ones or some shit. The few that were house ones or something were always a hot mess.

18.Talk about something that happened in elementary school.I got pantsed falling off the top of a human pyramid. I was always the tiniest one so I always was put up as the “point” and no one kept their balance so I fucking fell and somehow my pants came off and I was mortified.

OOO but we also went to this cool place, Muskoka Woods, and I had a great time hanging out there and doing all that fun shit. I did the Flying Squirrel (but not the Big Swing bc it broke, unfortunately). It’s when everyone grabs one side of a rope and you’re hooked up to like... idk a part of it or something? Idk man but like you’re hooked up by harness to a rope to this contraption thing and a bunch of people pull a rope and you go flying upwards. And since I was tiny I went. It was fun.

20.Talk about something that happened in high school.Did anything good happen in high school? Ah yes, one thing. My friend, Danielle, and I did fuck all in the grade ten science class (and a couple other classes lmao we did so much fuckery together in high school idk how we passed anything). Our science teacher was a bitch and the class was boring bc we didn’t get to do any experiments, it was just notes and textbook questions. So we never did it. Always ran away to Tim Horton’s any time we got together to do the work lmao.

ANYWAYS, so this one time no one’s doing anything. It’s almost end of class, and our lunch was next, so people are standing around. We don’t have any friends in this class, mind you. So we’re ignored. Idk how, but one of us got a piece of chalk. Danielle used it to make a mark on my uniform pants (Catholic school, so uniforms, and our pants were navy blue that day) which meant it wouldn’t rub off. So I made one on hers. And then somehow we just end up wrestling each other for it, and then we full out started tackling one another. Our desk (in this class we had desks that sat two people next to each other) was shoved forward into the desk in front of it, our chairs were fucking back against the wall (we sat in the back bc duh). 

And we’re just full out wrestling for this stupid piece of chalk. And no one even really looked our way. Our teacher didn’t glance up at us, which is wild bc she was one of Those teachers, and the other kids just ignored us like always. And we just ended up chasing each other around during lunch and it was so much fun.

Skipping 22.

24.Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.I’m lucky to have several friends who write me when I ask what’s likable about me and such, and on a few occasions have gotten an essay. But generally any time someone tells me I mean a lot to them (and bonus points when they tell me why), it’s like........ air for me. Can’t live if I’m not worthy to.

26.Talk about things you do when you're sick.Lmao I just got over the flu a couple weeks ago so this is ironic. I usually bundle the fuck up, turn on the fireplace, and wrap myself in blankets, and just sweat it out. One time when my dad and I had reeeeeally bad flus, we spent the entire day with the fireplace on, me in my fleece pjs (which I only wear when sick bc they’re hot), and wrapped in large blankets, and I sweat so much it felt good. Which is the opposite to myself any other time. So I make sure I sweat now as often as I can. 

I often watch t.v. or maybe, depending on how I’m doing, game a little. But usually I sleep, whether sporadically (like the time just passed - I slept a few hours, woke for a few, continue) or for hours, and drink lots of ginger ale. And not eat much at all, except sometimes soup. Mhm. Ginger ale feels really nice to drink when sick actually, esp on your throat. We used to get it as kids bc of the ginger in it, but there’s not much to be of any use, so I just drink it when sick now bc it’s cold and the pop’s syrupy enough to coat my throat, which you wouldn’t think but yeah. Also tea is nice.

The next few are meh and I’m tired so I’m not gonna answer any more bc girl you always send a lot. Thank you!