#at one point i thought i knew what to do but. i dont. i really dont i guess | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bulbabutt · 3 days

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you know why i dont care to get involved in fandom bs while watching a show live? cuz ill never forget how LOUD and ANNOYING people were watching steven universe when it aired.

i will never ever forget the person loudly yelling at everyone in the tag back in 2014 that this silhouette was an animation error and that "it had already been discussed and debunked" that garnet was a fusion

same shit happened with "rose is pink diamond" theory. this was the start of it. fucking the second we ever saw the idea of a pink diamond existing when there wasnt one anymore people were like "OH I WONDER" and then you had LOUD FUCKING PEOPLE complaining and debunking the theory as if they knew better. "NO cuz that would make rose the BAD GUY!" "no! that would make the story TOO COMPLEX!" dumbass shit.

it gives makorra bottles never popped in the end

but people will be always be loud and wrong all the fucking time and try and make you feel stupid for thinking maybe the writers have a plan and say theres no point to let yourself keep watching and learning more. i always think you should watch something until its done and see what the writers really wanted to say instead of shouting at other people on the internet for daring to be like "hey i wonder if--" or "this seems to me like--"

like sometimes people will look at things like THIS FUCKING OBVIOUS and scream that the artists just made a mistake. just cuz they didnt expect it. just cuz its not what they wanted the story to do when they thought about it in their heads.

a lot of times when theres a backlash to stuff its cuz shows dont go the way fandom spaces expected, and its less that the writing is bad than it is the fandom decides they know how a story will end by the time one season is out.

and i know youre all used to binge watching but not letting yourselves experience a story as it grows really hurts your brains sometimes. esp if you let a fandom ideology cloud your ability to experience an unravelling narrative.

#yeah im thinking about tf es again and what it was like watching shera live #and all these other things #idk this is random but god. i still find it funny how MANY people would get mad if u said 'i think garnet is a fusion' back then #and at the end of the day its like. hey. no matter what people who were loud and annoying said that show was good and paced itself well #idk how much sense this makes but like. i always try to give any show i watch the benefit of the doubt. i think its silly to not.#and again. people will shout that writing is 'bad' before theyve even grasped what the writing is alluding to

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scalpelsister · 4 months

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what if i lost the will to live like. as a joke. what then.

#i am fine ftr im just. exhausted haha #NOT to overshare about my personal life too much but my dog is dying. my horse is being given back to his og owner this summer / fall.#my dads kicking me out in two years (in favor of his girlfriend and her kids bc he would rather live w them!!!)#his alcoholism is driving me crazy bc hes treating me like absolute shit and berating me constantly #and stealing from me 🙃#ive lost my healthcare benefits + now have to either raw dog therapy out of pocket or loose my therapist #a therapist that took me a year of being on a waiting list to get in w btw #and idk i just genuinely feel like a loser rn like. im a 23 year old unemployed fat virgin who plays video games all day like. 🧍#where is this going for me. what is the point of it all. in two years im going to be fucking homeless on top of all that #unless some miracle happens bc as is i am too disabled to work.#im just reaching a point where i deeply dont care anymore. whatever happens happens im done fighting it #and ik its the abandonment issues talking here but knowing my dad is planning on abandoning me. 👍#thats two for two on parents leaving me. my entire family has at this point so like truly i cant trust any relationship #like if my PARENTS find me that unbearable. and my best friend who knew me my entire life thought so. then truly every relationship #i ever have is on a fucking timer like. idk if any besties r reading this im sorry i promise this is in no way a dig at yall #bc you guys do really make me feel loved and secure in a way no one else has but. id be lying if i said i wasnt still scared #anyways enough oversharing #i really am fine and safe rn btw like. at minimum u guys r stuck w me until arc*ne season 2 comes out 😂#my post

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anotherpapercut · 5 months

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working with children really will make you examine your thought processes and emotional reactions like nothing else. I've found myself being so much more thoughtful in my daily life about how I respond to my emotions and environment, as well as the reasoning behind why others behave the way they do

#yesterday i got really frustrated and overwhelmed at one point because this one little girl keeps getting really upset when she cant help me #like shell ask to help and i wont have a task (or ive run out bc shes already helped) shes capable of so i tell her that #and thank her for being thoughtful and helpful. admittedly the first time this happened i was really frustrated w her already #bc she had made a huge mess doing something i told her not to do and then didnt want to clean it up and she only came back #and asked to help because her friend had been helping me. so i was like girl. you didnt even clean up the last mess #but i also had nothing for her to do. anyway she started screaming and hid under a table so then her friend did it sith her just. because.#idk kids will see their friend freaking out and they do it too. and i understand it but my god. i dont deal well with really loud noise #and she did it again yesterday. i let her help me and then i ran out of tasks and she started crying and saying i never let her help #and for some reason there were like 6 other kids in there all wanting to help so then several of them started freaking out #and i could not handle it. i literally told my coworker like im about to cry right now lmao #and later the little girl was like wanting to hug me and talk to me and acting like nothing happened and i found myself wanting to withdraw #like i was feeling like i wanted to avoid her and not speak to her or be cold but i also knew i didnt want to treat her that way #and i took a couple minutes by myself and thought about why i felt that way‚ what the effects of that would be‚ and how the kid felt #and i really just had to remind myself that she was feeling just as many emotions as i was but that shes only had 6 years #to learn how to manage them and deal with them in a productive way. she wasnt trying to upset me. she wasnt trying to make me mad #she was just dealing with her emotions in the only way she knew how. and im an adult and if she can get over it i really need to get over it #long ass tag story sorry

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gnc-tits · 10 hours

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like girl why dont i just run away from anything + everything forever lol. if i cant even rely on the ppl closest to me who know me the best to like. not interpret the messy ways my bottled up 22 yr old anger/grief/WHATEVER is spilling out then i mean like. whats even the point of it yknow

#not talking abt killing myself just like running away into the mountains. oh ms appalachia after all these years yr still the only one who #understands me. fuckiinngngngngnyv SHUT up gay fucking poet bitchckfngnfnmvmf #i have therapy twice a week this week tho 😏#just like. man i havent even been in therapy two yrs at this point. i rlly connect with my therapist and i feel comfortable with her but #even she acknowledged the other day that we’ve only scratched the surface of Tha Big Stuff and. we’re gearing up to getting more into that #now but i couldnt have gotten to this point otherwise like it just. takes me a really long time to open up. not just with her but with #anyone. it just doesnt come naturally like i live in my head all the time i got mad dissociative shit goin on #and THATS something ive only just realized in like. the past week!!! like i knew i did it but i didnt process like. i dunno i guess the #extent to which i do it. like i know i overrationalize my feelings and i dont think i dissociate all the time but its deffo a big one of my #ptsd symptoms if not a symptom of fuckin. something else #because whyyyyy would i like. not have something else going on lolllllll #makes me feel bad like ive been lying to her or i havent been honest but i just get so. trapped in my own world #omfg THATS what tht short story i wrote was about. wow #anyways fucking whateverrrr i just get stuck yknow like!!!!!!!! autism x lonely isolated child syndrome = maladaptive daydreaming x 10000000 #and i dont realize that thats whats like. happening. good grieffffff #okay whatever back to actually journaling #side note: rlly been fucking w the thought of journalism lately. like admittedly i havent given much thought to it but its smthn id like to #look into in terms of writing. hurmmmmmmm

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thaeon · 4 months

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obviously late to the party on this like 9 years later and not saying anything that hasn't already been said but its sooo interesting going back and watching blind playthroughs of undertale bc its so funny how many of the people drawn to the game immediately fall into the very first pitfall set by it by being so unimaginative that they cannot imagine a game system existing that does not require grinding up levels even as they say to themselves they don't want to kill the characters AND the npcs reference the game mechanics TO them

#obviously its really hard to judge bc from my pov by the time i knew what undertale was in 2015 i already kinda knew how it worked #but its fascinating bc i only ever thought that people would choose to kill the monsters on purpose to get the no-mercy run #OR because they did it accidentally bc they encountered froggits before they got to the point where you are outright told that you can and #are encouraged to show mercy to anything with a yellow name #but ive watched a few people now who immediately get into the game and are somewhat engaging with the story? but on a completely different #level from using the mechanics of the game. theyre like “i dont want to kill this creature” on a story level but can't tie that to their #feelings of how the mechanics SHOULD work in their minds. the only game mechanics they know are Press Kill Button To Progress Forward.#so many of them are like “ahhh but i need xp tho... need to get to a higher lvl...” and its like... Why Exactly DO You Think That?#idk. its incredibly fascinating. its media literacy for video games. why do you think the fighting system and story are disconnected from #one another? so maybe ppl saying “aww this npc is so cuuuute” and then just kill them and im like. What do you THINK the ending is going to #be if this is how you think the game is going to be played? just unwillingness to attach themselves fully to the story. its soo interestin #gamers get away with a loooot when it comes to media literacy in the games they play #anyway alexa stream Conquest of Dread's decolonizing videogames video essay

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liu-yu-xin · 1 year

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Really fascinating that the group of ppl who have the most problem with lisa doing the burlesque show are chinese ppl (u would not believe how many video essays have been made about this from the moment it was announced to now the topic is literally inescapable everywhere u look and theyre acting like this single event is setting feminism back 50 years) BUT guess who were the ppl searching lisa 疯马秀 on twt for video footage and flooded the tag with porn bots. ALSO chinese ppl. The fucking irony of it all. Now i am aware these are probably not the same ppl and the pearl clutching group probably takes the most issue with the second group but this is YOUR fucking problem in YOUR society and youve decided to have this fight over the body of a woman who is a) not chinese b) not active in china c) not doing this performance in china like why do u even care??? And its gotten to the point where theres outrage about the two chinese actresses who went to fashion week and also went to lisa’s show saying they should be blacklisted and theyve ruined their career by associating with this like its just ridiculous

#and the wildest comment i saw was ‘this proves we have better feminism in china bc we would never let a woman degrade herself like this’#its like. from what im hearing u are doing most of the degrading here. AND its an issue thats so unanimously one sided that #men have felt comfortable making commentary disapproving of it and some of the stuff they say is just straight up misogyny again #like… congratulations u have gone from we have better feminism than the west to u have circled back to regular sexism #I really thought it would just die down but basically everyone in china who even knew who she was has turned on her #like do u think it’s feminist to attack the way she looks and call her names for dating the rich louis vuitton guy.#and i dont even want to defend lisa bc i also think its a weird career choice but thats IT. just say its #weird and move on!! stop inventing new forms of misogyny wrapped in feminism wrapped in misogyny wrapped in feminism #i am soo sick of ppl talking about this and bashing lisa for easy feminism points #lisa #blackpink #sidney talks shit

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alildritten · 1 year

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Ah yes, the scariest story of all:

G A Y

(/j)

#alright time for context in the tags!! your favorite show!!! yippee!#yeah so anyway basically i was thinking up fictional scenarios with my ocs (of course as always)#and i was thinking about hey! so what about this werewolf character. yknow? silver? what if we thought about when they were a little kid #and stuff. you know? why not and all and so i was having fun with that thinking about how theyd have had to keep their werewolf-ness #a secret. but their parents know and are trying to keep it a secret as well and what-not #and one day silver gets invited to a sleepover. yknow. at night. theyre a werewolf??? that wouldnt go well #other than the fact that they can control that wolf form?? (i need to figure out what to call it)#so itd be fine but its supposed to be a secret because if people knew silver would be reported to the authorites because in that universe #humans do exist they just kicked any weird hybrid or beast or whatever off onto another planet #jokes on them the little beasties are doing fine and after a bit of adjusting and working on fitting into the new world #that theywere forced onto with no way back #they have a whole civilization and are doing great!!! but everytime that the humans on their world realize someones like. a werewolf or #a vampire or anything. WELP BYE-BYE HAVE A NICE TRIP #and well theres a new orphan in town on the other world! well heck hopefully they live alright and maybe get adopted?#BUT ANYWAY OFF TRACK WHOOPS so basically silvers parents are like ‘no. you cant’ but silver’s friends had asked several times in the past #and really wanted to have a sleepover with silver. idk and so basically silver writes a note saying ‘hey i did go sorry bout that-#dont worry i got it covered i can keep my wolf formt hing hidden no worries’ or something basically says that and goes to the sleepover #(friends think silver finally got permission) and wow i just realized this is a long story heck lemme try and shorten a little #and eventually at one point they all wanna tell scary stories cause why not #and once i got there my brain kinda kept pausing and then swoosh new train thought woahh!!#and started thinking about a cute scenario about two ocs of mine who are VERY GAY hehe <3 #but i thought it was a bit funny because i realized that i was about to have some lil kids tell each other scary stories and then woop brain #go hey think about this cute gay scenario!! so ah yes. cute gay scenario=SCARY (/j)#does this even make any sense at all i genuinely dont know but i had fun talking about ocs so yea ima sleep now #have a good day/night to you!!! <333 YIPPEE anyway bye bye goodnight bla bla bla woohoo

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hauntingblue · 11 days

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Skypiea time part 2

She is a woman..... this is sanji's influence... in whiskey peak his slashes were non gendered

Ace just letting himself get pushed into the river like aight my bad I will take my punishment.... he really is so well mannered (it sounds like I'm talking about a dog)

Conis showing that nami influence.... gfs....

Nami and luffy twins moment look how relieved she is... this whole fight is so theirs...

Also how funny it is that the milk girl gave ace a shirt.... also new pants??? She must think he lost the shirt in the river.... no girl he is just a slut...

Nami: okay ❤️ yay ❤️

Noland just thinking about where karugara is and if he is alright in his EXECUTION!! SICK AND TWISTED

OMG BOUNDMAN INSPO????

NO ACEEE NOOOOOOOO

THE END OF ACES STORY IS THAT THE COFFE IS NO LONGER BITTER BC THEY SERVE IT WITH MILK AND WHY AM I EMOTIONAL ABOUT IT

#luffy carrying karugaras will to make cricket hear the bell tolling.... god.... but i think i missed why he knows there is a bell #luffy is smart idk if enel mentioned it or he connected the points between the ones cricket had #and right now i get my answers... damn you oda... cricket making sure he sends luffy where he wants to go so now luffy will get him the bel #nami and her waver are literally invincible... i miss it where did it go.... she and the waver and zeus could take down big mom i am seriou #robin watching the ruins be destroyed... if she could get her hands on enel i onow it would be gruesome #i just will never get over how the people just start praying to god to save them and luffy does like that is insane it is too early #did oda had nika in mind already (by old sketches he did) or some concept of it like what the hell chapter 297... and so explicit...#on the second read it really sticks out like damn.... foreshadowing and also a lot of lore starts here its amazing....#HE LITERALLY MAKES IT SUNNY AGAIN LIKE WHAT ARE WE DOING!!! HELLO???!!!#luffy doing like noland did and making god worthless... i mean different instances but the god the shandians praised was very much like ene #omnipresent and vengeful. have to keep him pleased if you dont want to suffer his wrath etc...#and then the god the people pray to save them is luffy (even if they dont know) which does good and asks for nothing in return.... yeah....#cricket was so worried about them omg.... crying and everything knowing they are alright and also made his life worth it like damn #now everyone comes back to life yeah yeah weve all seen it... only luffy knew a good party could end a 400 year territorial feud #you know the fact that netflix could use skypiea to make a insensitive tasteless two state solution reference with this makes my blood boil #<- very tangential but alos very real solution bc i do not trust them to be critical bellemere said stealing is bad. what next #robin learns about ancestdal weapons and says tss... whatever this isnt history jadhiansksns #so roger followed its guide?? so he was looking for the weapons too?? my axis mundis theory makes sense ajdianiskanao #nvm roger took the poneglyph with the history i guess... thats more boring..... roger took the info on the poneglyphs to laugh tale??? okay #THE COOKS ARE THE GIRLS PARENTS.... I THOUGHT IT WAS THE CAPTAINS DAUGHTER!!! OOOOHHH THAT IS EVEN BETTER THEY ENJOYED ACE EATING SO MUCH 😭#aokiji is the strongest man in the marine headquarters... so that was a fucking lie....#reading one piece

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gifti3 · 2 months

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today i think about how some men really think all (or at least most) women just dont like sex at all and it still kinda shocks me that they genuinely believe this! being in fandom spaces from a young age the type of shit ill see women saying about some fictional character or actor even has me flabbergasted at times

#im bringing this up cause!!!#like i finally learned about the “hawk tuah” girl and im just shaking my head #first of all i was avoiding it cause i already knew it was some shit i did not wanna know about #for various reason #but now i saw a video about it and #i just feel bad for her #like u really cant make a joke without ppl thinking its an invitation to be gross towards you #but also i dont get the obsession #i get why its happening #but from my point of view im just like...what is wrong with you ppl #is it really that shocking that a women would say that??#it also kinda had me thinking about my short flop history of trying to date #and how in the end what what i mainly got from it is just to never talk about sex ever #it really is a shame #you react positively to sex and thats the only aspect of you that matters forever #like seriously some guys will piss you off/ignore you and then try to go back to flirting with you when its convenient for them #like thats fuckin weird if you do that im sorry #people have layers come on now #someone liking sex doesnt mean....“ah yes i dont have to try to be decent or treat this person well”#yall gotta really start looking at people #like look at them #that persn has a whole inner world going on #this isnt a cartoon or game where they have one character trait #if you cant grasp this then leave that person alone lol #anyways sorry tangent #but yea thats my morning thoughts for today

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shidoukanae · 3 months

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also now realizing there's a heavy possibility that the unknown event Daniel references where he asks Lyla "how are you going to find your happiness?" is the same event Helene references when she tells Lyla that Lyla "betrayed" her.

Coincidentally, that's probably the same event that allowed Helene to be manipulated by the Empress into turning against Lyla and might have been the cause of Daniel leaving Lyla (probably to find out how to awaken as a dragon so he could gain the power to take her away from her family faster? maybe even going so far as to try and compete w/ Paris for the throne if it means protecting Lyla?)

There's also a suspicious gap of time from when Helene was poisoned to when she told Lyla to get away from her that has been omitted. And considering baby Lyla cries about Helene not wanting to be with her anymore...and that same baby Lyla is seen hugging Daniel in the unexplored scene...Lyla what the fuck did you do to Helene to embitter her like this?

#the mighty extra #the mighty extra: one girl changes the world #me a week ago: gee im not sure if the Helene saying Lyla betrayed her scene makes sense re: Lyla's death #me now: ohhhhhhhh we haven't gotten to the reason why Helene felt betrayed yet gooootcha that's why something feels amiss #something happened in the gap of time between when Helene got poisoned and when she turned her back on Lyla gooootcha #and here i thought it was a smooth transition but now i see i have yet again been tricked by my own bad expectations LMAO #im so used to just accepting half-baked explanations that are construed to try and explain canon events i didn't even think to doubt myself #this story really is the gift that keeps on giving #also the idea of Daniel competing with Paris for the sake of ensuring Lyla gets to live a happy life is really fucking cute #he gives off a lot of big brother vibes and honestly for a “unpredictable crazy dragon” he's such a sweetheart #my current guess is that Arne somehow tricked Helene to turn against Lyla? or tricked Lyla into hurting Helene somehow (emotionally)?#because these sisters ADORED each other very clearly and Helene being poisoned by Sienna wouldn't have broken their bond so easily #whatever happened was bad enough that Daniel said it was better off if she forgot all about it #which #she did #but not in the way he expects alas #and here i was thinking Helene was just an asshole because she felt severely hurt by Lyla's dangerous actions #nope! she's got a reason indeed and the fact that she felt betrayed by Something TM and yet still tries to save Lyla anyways is just #Interesting!#there's still more depth to dig out of these sisters and their relationship together pre-“Lyla” and im living for it!!!#also im still so confused about Daniel #so he was the sea witch's apprentice which means he knew Sienna but also he ran away from the sea witch at some point #and has been on the run from his own empire joined some pirates is now living with Ellie and is going to Lyla's side post the finale #i still dont get why he didn't take Lyla with him or come back for her. was he waiting to do so? for what? he was already awakened as a-#as a dragon by the time he found Lyla again. and he definitely didn't forget about her so like #*tilts head*#i can understand him being like “oh Lyla left guess she didn't wait for me” but i don't think he's ever implied that???#considering Daniel's side of Lyla's past still has holes in it I think there's going to be answers coming soon to this question but man #i love trying to do a conspiracy board in my head of the events that went down in the bg re: Lyla bc it's so fascinating to piece together #everything is explained but also nothing is explained and the writing for this story is really admirable as fuck

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i-write-sin-not-tragedy · 1 year

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#feel so tired.#bad thoughts nonestop. i wish i knew what to do #its my first day off and all i can do is think about going back to work and cry about it #i really dont want to. im so tired. sleep is never enough i have no energy to do anything i enjoy anymore.#and it feels like ultimately no one cares #they'll vaugely comfort me or pat me on the back and say it'll be okay but #i know they're doing the most they can do #so i feel horrible and guilty for feeling like this but #im quickly reaching a point of I'd rather die than go back. at least then i could actually rest.#not that anyone in my life who COULD do something would. the ones who can wont bc they dont care #im only loved based off the value i have to them #and im very quickly losing value.#i want this to end

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nomaishuttle · 1 year

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i think maybe my streak system is a bitttt op...

#i might have t rework th points.. bc i earned 108.5 in spending money this week lol #i did do very good tho... i met my weekly goal for every single task except for eat well #but tbh eat well is one of the harder and also vaguer ones.. bc its eat something with vegetables Or try a new food and i just donot grt #much opportunity to do either...#but. i will keep it there so that i know my foley #im so proud of myself ive been brushing and flossing twice a day for over a week !!!!#AND i showered alnost every day this week... i didnt yesterday and i didnt todya bc brother i dont have work. and my hair needs a break lol #<- joke my hair feels so nice all da time... Who knew that being clean makes u feel better. this is craaaazy #i dont wanna get toooo far ahead of myself. i dont wanna get 2 big 4 my britches...#a fun fact is that when we were little our dad taught us 2 say britches instead of pants #solely bc my sibling had a hard time pronouncing r's . so when our granny watched us theyd go GRANNY I NEED MY BITCHES!!!!!! and my dad #thought it was the funniest thing ever #mainly bc my granny Didnt want us cussing but also thought it was really funny bc its so funny when kids cuss. so everytime shed be like #your WHAT? trying not to laugh and then shed be like your britches . okay and then shed slap my dad lol. shoutout to my grannyy #idk if u guys heard but she died. very sad. very sad #<- genuinely very sad that sounded sarcastic. ngl controversial i miss my granny im just kinda weird like that like when my family member #dies im sad abt it... im kind of an empath so i just like i can sense the absence of their energy and it causes my energy to recede.. aura #crystals and et cetera.

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235uranium · 1 year

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I personally like to think that ford was invited to work on the gravity falls cern equivalent and turned it down to go hunt cryptids in the pnw. I think this is also one of the reasons he doesn't talk to his family anymore

#☢️.txt #i mean i also personally think that ford WAS pissed about stan getting kicked out but knew there was no point in fighting with their father #i mean. i dont think caryn wouldve given stan his phone number if she thought ford would be pissed off about it #but i do think ford deciding to turn down a massive career opportunity like working for a large government lab or ur war crime factories #would piss filbrick off. i tolerated you bc you could make us money but instead youre running off with the money to hunt bigfoot #it also makes stan mentioning how ford didnt share his grant another point of frustration. probably something hes been hearing for years #in general i really dislike when people write the fight between stan and ford as being very one-sided with stan playing no role #like yes he got the objectively worse deal! but like ford doesnt seem to know this.#i really do not think ford wouldve told stan to just leave if he knew he was hiding from the fucking cartel #ford can be an asshole but he doesnt want stanley to get HURT. even when theyre fighting he seems absolutely appalled #when stan gets burned. like hes completely ready to end the fight to make sure stan is okay #also tbqh i dont think what ford said in that scene can be taken as the most representative of his character #hes in the middle of paranoid psychosis and fighting off the threat of being possesed

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minglana · 1 year

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im gonna fucking kill myself WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY do i keep failing these fucking exams!!!! i fucking study for them thats the worst part! i study for them and i fail and oh my god. cuarta puta matricula para otra puta asignatura es que what even is the meaning of my fucking life. i feel like im going insanse like im stuck in the same fucking place every single fucking year and i just. cannot fucking escape from these basic ass classes that i keep fucking failing!!!!!!!!

#at one point i thought i knew what to do but. i dont. i really dont i guess #at what point should i throw in the towel. i feel like i shouldve done it ages ago. but my stupid little monkey brain tells me to keep goin #bc i dont know what else there is to life except be in school and try to study. and all its acomplishing is: 1. draining my energy #2. making the environment at home (w my mom) absolutely inhabitable for me. and 3. draining my parents pockets.#and bc of my shit grades i cant get any financial help at all. except the housing. which just makes the situation 10x worse #i feel like im gonna have to spend the entire summer studying if i want to even think about passing any/some of next year's classes #and i dont even want to go to the exam on wednesday bc i know ill do just as bad. actually no. ill do even worse. i havent studied at all #i want to cry so fucking bad and its all bc my stupid brain refuses to cooperate with what i actually do want.#xarraire #suicide mention

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euniexenoblade · 7 months

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since we're talking about call outs lately, i've been called out many times, most of which are made from lies and sometimes by altering screenshots, but the most effective call out i ever got was like, in early 2015 there was a tumblr user everyone knew was a terf, but she would say "actually i support trans women" this was before crypto terfs were as talked about so the language wasn't really there to say "hey this person is a crypto terf." but yeah some people put posts of this woman on my dash and i made a random post on my blog "why do yall reblog her shes a terf" and of course she searches her own name daily, found my post, and replied to it that me calling her a terf was racist. that was it. no other interaction. but she went on all night talking about me being racist and just making things up as she went "oh i bet she says the n word all the time irl" kind of shit that had, like no basis? But her follower base took it 100% and i literally had thousands of anons telling me to kill myself, trying to goad me into being racist (didnt work), and the most concerning thing was i got hundreds of anons being like "what was the point of doing hrt if you still look like that, you should kill yourself." It was like, violent and overwhelming. and on top of it I'd get random young teenager trans people who followed her and bought into her bioessentialism showing up in my messages being like "you give trans people a bad name" "you're why transphobia exists" etc etc it was fucking crazy.

but i lost like, no followers because everyone around me understood, this woman was a terf. this all set up the real one though.

later in the year a teenage "communist" trans girl made some snarky comment about me being racist on a post of mine blowing up. i ignored her cuz like, who cares it's just some random teenager. but i guess people were looking for a reason to hate me cuz that blew up, lots of people just took that at face value no need to investigate. when someone finally did send the girl an ask being like "hey how is she racist" she replied "I dont remember but I know she is" and even more people just took this as 100%. the thing is, i do remember her being one of those "you make trans people look bad" terf following young trans people, it's not that she didn't remember, it's that she didnt want to admit she followed a terf and she believed a terf just saying shit. I lost like 3/4s of my followers, i had a lot of people i thought were my friends just stop talking to me, and going forward every time i got a call out there would usually be a line of like "also she's racist, everyone already knows this" all cuz this girl needed to make a snarky comment cuz she just loves terfs.

the thing about the "i dont remember" bit is it made some weird game of telephone. "I dont remember" became "oh she's racist, i think she says the n word" which became "she called black bloggers the n word" like people just made shit up about me and connected it to this call out. and when id be like this isnt true id be met with a "this is just known, youre a known racist" and it's like, to this day i will still find people be like "hey good on you for growing as a person and not doing that any more" and its like I NEVER DID IT TO BEGIN WITH

#ranting

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partycatty · 5 months

Text

how many donuts can you stack on it

i feel like ive got this down to a science.

warnings: describing fictional characters' peanits in length.

notes: this is what i come back with to post (1 donut = 1 inch)

[ masterlist ]

liu kang > he's got a bioweapon in motion and form, truly. it's so big and thick you might actually die if you try to take it all. 9 donuts. he'll let you do anything to it, silly or not, if it makes you crack a hungry grin like you did when you counted.

bi-han > idk i feel like its not that big, but it's got good thickness.... 4 and a half donuts. finds it stupid, won't agree to putting donuts on it at first, but gives in just so you'll stop. he's embarrassed.

kuai liang > husband length. humble but knows he can get the job done... thinks he could be bigger but you dont complain. 6 donuts. he's too kind and sweet to really have a problem with it.

johnny cage > he thought he'd be able to fit more donuts... not that the current amount is small. 7 and a half donuts. he might try and cram that second half in, but it falls off and splats on the ground.

kenshi takahashi > confident but quiet about it, the donuts don't stop stacking even when you think you couldn't fit another. 9 donuts. expected it, not surprised, but chuckles dryly at your little gasp.

kung lao > tried it on himself before you even got the chance to ask. 7 donuts after trying multiple times at home. lies and says it was nine donuts when he tried it at home...

raiden > nobody expects it from him, since it's not on the forefront of his mind like his bestie... 9 donuts. just thought everyone could fit that many no problem. you had to explain that he's massive.

rain > doesn't talk about it because there isn't really much to say... 5 donuts. (why doesn't he have a personality ever)

tomas vrbada > you just... kept going.... and before you knew it, 8 and a half donuts sat pretty hugging him as he smiles in delight. at first he didn't get your vision, but seeing the shock on your face was more than enough.

baraka > afraid of showing it, tarkat enhanced... all of his features. nearly a baker's dozen, 10 donuts fit with no problem. he growls to himself, adjusting his hips. maybe his condition had a perk.

geras > won't really get why you want donuts on it... but will entertain your ridiculousness. he stands stock still and firm when you put a whopping ten and a half donuts on him. he raises a brow, wondering what the point was.

syzoth > his tongue flicks in curiosity as you try to balance the donuts on both, squeezing a whopping 14 donuts combined! he grins in satisfaction, wondering how many donuts his true form could hold.

havik > it fell off. 0 donut.

shao > shitting your pants when you put the entire dozen onto it, and still have some wiggle room. shao remains unimpressed but silently pleased with his thickness and length as it balances the treats.

shang tsung > it's cute. 5 donuts was his max, but he seems smug about it. he knows you'll take him either way, and the thought makes him smirk.

reiko > 7 and a half donuts stops him short but he just laughs loudly with his hands on his hips. asks if you're impressed, and then offers for you to eat the donuts right off of him.

ermac > ....would ermac have millions of dicks? or just one in his physical manifestation? how many donuts is that...? you'll be there for a while.

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