#bathing in clothes is awesome for my sensory issues

[white-wolf-soul]

[transmxnfenris]

You know what?

I’m a trans guy

I’m pretty traditionally masculine

I’m also pretty traditionally feminine

I’m kind of in the middle too

And I’m also neither

I love feminine clothes even if I can’t wear them cause dysphoria and sensory issues but hell yeah I support the dudes that can. Make up is awesome too.

I watch cartoons, I collect stuffed animals, I rock a backpack covered in cute cartoon foxes and a turtle pencil case, I have socks with rainbow patterns and various cute animals sewn into them. Bath bombs and candles and lush are my life. I collect crystals, tarot cards, and spiritual things.

I’m camp. I love musical theatre, I’m dramatic, I drink rosé, I enjoy watching dancing, going to art galleries and museums, I love extravagant ridiculous outfits, I even have a limp wrist for crying out loud.

I dress in ways that make me feel like my favourite characters, regardless of gender. I love when people can’t figure out what gender I am. Sometimes.

I like sports - ice hockey, boxing, swimming, wrestling, the olympics, even football sometimes. I’m a bit rough and tumble. I’m scruffy. My clothes are old and torn. I’m clumsy. I bite my nails all the way down. I’m nerdy - I read comics and play board games. I collect action figures and actually own some Star Wars novels.

I wear masculine clothes, I get so dysphoric I can’t leave the house some days, being misgendered feels like a stab to the chest. I’m a guy, albeit a more genderfluid version. But I don’t see what any of the above has to do what with that. I don’t see what my distress has to do with that. I’m not male because of it, sometimes it doesn’t bother me too much. I’m not a man because of anything I mentioned above. I’m a trans man because I know I’m a trans man and that’s it. That’s all there is to it. It’s that simple. If anyone goes through being trans, which is hard in itself, and manages to do it with some suffering? I’m really happy for them. I’m glad they can be themselves and not have to deal with the horrific dysphoria I do.

I’m never going to wish pain on other people.

And I’m always going to believe in someone’s perception of who they are and their experiences over anyone else’s.

[firephox]

As a vegan, I’ll assume you use Agave instead of honey, so I will tell you a few things about the farming practices. It takes up massive amounts of land, the entire plant has to be harvested, and at least two endangered species that feed off the plants are killed as pests. That’s not even getting into working conditions for the actual farmers. Regardless of your issues with honey, agave is much worse.

Before I start, I just want to let you know I don’t know how to argue very well and I’m sorry if any of this comes off as rude. I don’t even use agave or honey, all of it tastes so awful. It’s a sensory thing. Not every vegan is the same you know. I honestly could care less about beekeeping. Bee keepers, do your thing, just stop doing shit like squashing queens and tearing their wings off. That’s kind of sad. I’m also vegetarian because I honestly hate the embarrassing ass vegan posters and “I’m not meat” crying animal pictures. (Like come on, we’re all meat, even humans produce taurine in the muscle, meaning we are supposed to be eaten). I am only Vegetarian for my own purposes, because I see the world in black and white, and I’m also autistic. I don’t love animals, I respect them. 

Fair trade is a thing that exists too you know? Meat can’t be fair trade, but fruit/veggies/meat free products can. Also, agriculture takes up 70% of the world’s land, which only 1% is dedicated to plant farming, and you get thousands of pounds worth more in food than animal farming. Also like, Omni diets require more vegetables? You have to feed the animals you eat, thousands of pounds of grain until slaughter age you know right? Vegan diets require less land space, and a lot of vegans are choosing to grow their own vegetables or buy from local growers instead of big grocery stores. All told, farmed animals consume 40% of all grain produced and 70% of all soy produced globally, which means that most crop labor is expended to meet the demands of meat based diets, not vegan ones.I strongly urge you to ONLY buy meat from local or small farms, in order to combat capitalism. Or are you trying to say that I’m not allowed to so my best to save animals, people and the environment because you personally like the spices and flavors put on meats? 

Yes, as with any industry there will be those who are exploited, the same as how you are probably wearing clothing right now that was made with slave labor in a 3rd world country. So, by your logic, unless you have absolutely nothing in your house, fridge, or on you that was made by exploiting workers, you don’t get to talk? See, we’re not all perfect here. Every vegan draws the line somewhere, the same as how you draw the line somewhere too. You complain about exploiting crop workers, but you don’t care about the workers in factory farms that undergo possibly some of the worst and most stressful conditions in the workplace. 

Also, I’m pretty sure growing plants is beneficial to the environment, and like, the toxic waste and blood mixture from factory farms is not? When it has to be dumped back into the environment? There are native and black communities that are being taken over by the pollution from nearby factory farms, and the waterways are being polluted with the toxic run off. Anyone who tries to speak up against the interference is met with legal action or threat. If you are looking to attack plant farming, attack cocaine farming because the harvesting process is actually bad for the environment because of the acid extraction, which then just gets dumped into waterways and land because well, it’s illegal. Also, stacked crop gardens are becoming more popular to save space, as well as rooftop gardening in urban areas. Let me see you try and raise cattle on a rooftop lol. 

What about the wolves, coyotes, and bears that are culled in order to keep livestock safe? You don’t seem to care about those? Sure a few mice are killed when harvesting crops or something, but what is a highly reproductive non threatened mouse population to an endangered, starving predatory species? The wolves, foxes, coyotes, bears, cougars, etc. that get caught in snares on the outskirts of cattle grazing land and are left to die? The farmers that “love animals so much” that they shoot hungry wildlife… for no reason? Also, like I heard that Honeybees aren’t even native to North America. For the 2 endangered species that feed on agave plants, agave is a plant harvested mainly in Mexico and the Nectar feeding Bat has been taken off the endangered list as of April 2018. The Weevil insect is not endangered at all, the Mohave Ground Squirrel is threatened yes, but not only by agave farming, but also by livestock grazing, as well as off highway vehicle use, and pellet gunning. 

Also, tell me more about the working conditions of factory farms, where the majority of the workers are POC, who endure brutal conditions with stressed animals and heavy machinery. They are at great risk for injury, as well as mental health issues like PTSD. The factory farm workers are the ones slicing the necks of the animals, hanging them up, bolting them, separating thousands of male-female chicks a day, tagging them, etc. The workers who are sometimes forced to stand for 10 hours a day, to keep the kill line going, and have been known to urinate on themselves, get injuries and not be able to tend to them, get slammed by a mad cow, get bitten by a pig, etc. The kill line in factory farms has to keep moving, and sometimes the animal moves too suddenly, or the worker just misses, and the animal is left only partially bolted or stunned, and is left fully conscious as they are hooked and sliced. 

Not all factories are the same, some factories don’t even bolt, but instead use scalding baths, electrocution, suffocation, gas chambers, etc. but the many that have had undercover footage have been disgusting. I know people who have visited or worked at some factory farms (I live in farm country) and I have yet to hear about a factory where the animals weren’t treated horribly. A guy I know who worked for a factory witnessed a farmer slam a baby pig against a metal column, wring a chicken’s neck, brand a pig, etc, and then the same farmer go on to be upset about dog eating festivals in China? If there was no problem with factories, there wouldn’t be any reason to argue against them.

Not part of the argument, but I want to include this anyway. Every great movement is has the few that take it too far, and ruin the cause for the rest. For example, Feminism is awesome, but there are some who take it to Feminazi levels, and become man haters and transphobes. Veganism is in itself, supposed to be for health and destroying factory farms, but we have some vegans like PETA, who just put up silly posters outside lobster restaurants and make a fuss, which then ruin the cause. See my point? 

[temistheranger]

Questions Game

Rules: Answer all questions, add one question of your own and tag as many people as there are questions. (Or as many as you want.  I’m not your momma.) I was tagged by @seljepw  (She’s awesome and I’m honored she thought of me.) 1. Coke or Pepsi: Pepsi, I guess?  I prefer Dr. Pepper or Cheerwine, honestly. 2. Disney or Dreamworks: Disney 3. Coffee or Tea: Tea 4. Books or Movies: Books, definitely. 5. Windows or Mac: Windows.  I have a Mac laptop that I got for free and there are so many non-intuitive things about it that I get crazy frustrated... 6. DC or Marvel: Er...Marvel?  I like superheroes but I feel like the Marvel movies are better?  I collect “The Spectre” comics (DC) but only for the weird factor. 7. Xbox or Playstation: PlayStation.  But I only have a 2. 8. Dragon Age or Mass Effect: Dragon Age. 9. Night Owl or Early Rise: Night Owl.  But I blame the insomnia and sensory processing disorder. 10. Cards or Chess: Cards and Chess? 11. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate and Vanilla?  But I default to vanilla. 12. Vans or Converse: Converse.  I have four pairs and they ROCK. 13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash or Adaar: Hm.  Trevelyan?  I haven’t played Inquisition yet. 14. Fluff or Angst: Some angst with fluff? 15. Beach or Forest: Forest.  Trees and trees and birdies! 16. Dogs or Cats: Cats. 17. Clear Skies or Rain: Clear skies.  Better for the brain. 18. Cooking or Eating Out: Cooking.  Love goes into every meal. 19. Spicy Food or Mild Food: Spicy.  Clears the sinuses. 20. Halloween/Samhain or Solstice/Yule/Christmas: Christmas! 21. Would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: Cold!  You can always put on more layers.  But there is a solid limit to how many clothes you can take off. 22. If you could have a superpower, what would it be? Voluntary Invisibility. 23. Animation or Live Action: Probably animation?  But I could be convinced to watch something with people. 24. Paragon or Renegade: Paragon.  Healing!  Shouts! 25. Baths or Showers: Showers 26. Team Cap or Team Iron Man: Team Get Over Yourselves 27. Fantasy or Sci-Fi: Both, each has their virtues. (And each can be equally cringeworthy.) 28. Do you have three or four favourite quotes? If so, what are they: "The beauty of grace is it makes life not fair." -Relient K "Be My Escape" "The world is quiet here." -Lemony Snicket, "A Series of Unfortunate Events" "Reason does not scream. Reason convinces." -Luis A. Ferré, third elected Governor of Puerto Rico “I'm never going to go to Mars, but I've helped inspire, thank goodness, the people who built the rockets and sent our photographic equipment off to Mars.” - Ray Bradbury 29. YouTube or Netflix: Netflix 30. Harry Potter or Percy Jackson: Harry Potter. I’ve never read Percy Jackson. 31. When You Feel Accomplished: Fixing a tech issue. 32. Star Wars or Star Trek: B-both?! 33. Paperback Books or Hardback Books: Paperback.  Easier to carry around. 34. Handwriting or Typing: Typing!  I’m way faster at typing than I am at writing! 35. Velvet or Satin: Neither?  The textures mess with me hardcore. 36. Video Games or Movies: Video games. 37. Would you rather be the dragon or own the dragon? Own one.  But a trained one, obviously. 38. Sunrise or sunset: Sunset.  Who wants to be awake during sunrise? 39. What’s your favourite song? Right now, “Evelyn” by Kim Tillman and Silent Films 40. Horror Movies yes or no: I love a good monster movie.  Especially B movies. 41. Long hair or short hair: I grow mine out and cut it short in a two-year cycle, so...both?  Right now it’s medium-long. 42. Opera or Theatre: Theatre (Unless it’s a Puccini opera.) 43. Assuming the multiverse theory is true and every story ever told has really happened somewhere, which one of the movie/book/tv show/game/etc worlds would you pick to travel to first? First? I have to pick? 44: If you had to eat only one thing for the rest of your life what would it be? Pizza, as long as I could have a variety of pizza toppings and not just pepperoni forever. 45: Older guys or young guys? Older. 46: If you could erase any show from TV history, what would it be? Jersey Shore.  As an Italian-American...yeah.  It needs to be gone. 47: Singing or dancing? Singing.  I can do the dancing thing but not well. 48: Instagram or Twitter? Instagram.  Twitter is insanity. 49: Flowers or chocolate? Chocolate.  Or pizza. 50: If you could send ONLY 3 words to yourself at 15, what would they be? ”Dump him, girl.” My question: 51: If you had to pick one outfit to wear forever, what would it be? I’m not going to tag 50 people, because I don’t think I know that many.  But I’ll tag @gothvelma, @onlyreadsbooksandshecannotdraw, and @bowties-and-souffles

[honestmomming-blog]

let’s get down and dirty! Life is hard, and I think we make it even harder because we lose our ability to play. As children, most of us had no problem with getting dirty; engaging in messy play was so much fun! And then, as we grow older, messy play becomes unacceptable. By the time we have our own kids, we have to remind ourselves that it is ok to allow them to get messy, to not be afraid of the mess associated with this. Unfortunately that, as well as the time it takes to clean up after the act, is a big part of the reason why parents and other care givers shies away from these activities. In other cases, parents might feel that they will be criticised if their kids are walking around with dirty, stained clothes, which might even have holes in them. The day I had my kids (actually the day I got married ) I made peace with the fact that I might never again have a clean and painstakingly neat home, and my little girls most probably won’t be going around looking like princesses. Today I am blessed with a wild and energetic toddler who runs, never walks, in the rain, jumps in puddles, digs in the sand, and paints herself, the paper, the floor, and anything else within a 5m radius. Our house have numerous corners for her to be comfortable in, to read her books, and to have all her soft toys packed out on the floor. I know getting messy is a big part of growing up – kids must be able to get dirty. If they are not allowed to, if they are actively discouraged from getting dirty, it can potentially limit cognitive development. So being messy is not just fun, it also has numerous educational and developmental benefits.

Although playing with toys can be educational and fun, messy play puts the focus on exploring and experimenting. During messy play, there is no definite end goal or right or wrong way to use the materials, giving kids the freedom to play unrestricted, to really engage their creativity, focus, and imagination. This sensory adventure gives them the chance to experience how different things feel, smell, taste, and move. When painting, using mud or paint or whatever, the child starts to develop an early form of writing. The extreme concentration needed to explore an object hones your child’s ability to read a book or write a story, further fostering the ability to play independently. Big movements needed to draw or press clay into forms trains the large muscles in the arms and the smaller muscles in the hands and fingers, developing body control and teaching your child the control eventually needed to hold a pen or use scissors. Play that incorporates rich textural elements allows children to express their emotions through manipulating the materials and refines their sense of touch. The richer the textural elements, the richer their cognitive and language development will be – how can a eight-year-old grasp the concept of “soapy” or “slimy” or “ice cold” if he has never touched anything “soapy, slimy or ice cold”? Playing unrestricted also allows your child the opportunity to learn about cause and effect (mixing colours, pressing too hard on your crayon, knocking over a play dough tower) as well as size, shape and many other abstract concepts.

Some other benefits of messy play are evident in the following areas: • Mathematical: counting, determining space and measuring distances • Knowledge: questioning, exploring, investigating, creating • Physical: movement, using equipment, tools, and materials • Creative: exploring materials, imagination and responding to new insights • Social: confidence, self-control, communicating new findings

Eager to get your kids in on these awesome development opportunities? Then here are some ideas (we do all and more, mixing them up as time, weather, company, and mood allows): 1. A sand box, filled with clean beach sand. I added about 100g of cinnamon powder to our sand to keep insects away, and we covered the sand box at night with a cover to keep stray cats away. A1 at first hated the sand (sensory issues as a result of SPD) but after a while, and lots of conditioning, she learned to love the sand. She would spend hours digging, carrying around bowls of sand, burying her feet, etc. until we decided enough is enough – the sand in the house got to be too much and so we donated it  2. Water play – on a warm day (and if there are no water restrictions), nothing beats running through a sprinkler, or playing in the swimming pool. We bought a small inflatable pool that we filled not even 1/4, just enough water that she can sit in it and splash her hands and feet, and when we empty the pool play in the resulting mud. 3. Bath time fun – give your child small cups, spoons, bowls, actually anything hollow that she can fill with water and then dump. Although this doesn’t make such a mess, it can result in the bathroom being under water! So set some rules and everybody will be happy. 4. Paint – with fingers, feet, elbows, brushes, basically with anything that she can! A1 has mild SPD, so she hates getting her hands dirty. When we paint, she prefers using a brush, and to paint her body instead of the paper! So we end up VERY dirty. But through a lot of “practice” she is getting better at handling the slimy texture of paint, and progressing nicely. Just make sure that the paint you use is washable and safe (some of the cheaper finger paints are not washable, big mistake painting in your cloth nappy!). If your bambino is like A1, she also sticks everything in her mouth, making painting a daunting task. I circumvented this by making my own edible paint – the easiest recipe you can find here – and then photographing the end result as you can’t really keep the artwork… 5. Playing with play dough – not high up on our list as A1 kept on eating it, and I just never got round to making a home-made version that was safe to ingest. Also, don’t really want to encourage her to eat the play dough, no matter how safe it might be. If you are braver than me, you can find nice recipes here and here for edible play dough. 6. Bubbles – A1 loves bubbles, of any kind. Whether it is blowing them, or bathing in them, or watching them form in the washing machine, bubbles are a big part of our day. We make our own blowing bubbles with dish washing soap in water, and a natural foam bath using the recipe here or Soap Barn’s amazing Bath Snow. 7. Foodstuffs – A bowl of rice, or whole grain cereal, or spaghetti, all make for awesome play things! Hide small objects such as figurines in the rice, let her “glue” the cereal in paint, etc. Making jelly in a large container with objects set inside also gives her the opportunity to get to know the “slimey” elements.

There are numerous other ideas out there. If you can’t think of one, allow your child to guide you. Remember, kids who play are developing, growing, and learning. So allow them to get involved when you cook, when they bath, when out and about. Allow them to get messy, and dirty, and sticky! That is the only way that they will learn  so…. Go forth and make a mess

The benefits of messy play - let us get down and dirty! let's get down and dirty! Life is hard, and I think we make it even harder because we lose our ability to play.