#be nice about peoples work you know i'm not a factory for kids toys

[barksbog]

getting blocked speed run

[rhineposting]

I'm Monnie by the way nice to meet you, genuinely hope I do not bother you at all!

I'm the creator of Charlie The Cursed Phone Guy (not sure if you have or haven't seen him before, but some people are familiar)

If you do know about him, I'm curious on how you'd rewrite him to fit into a more serious narrative since unlike the offical phone guy's he's not made by the factory, a simple bootleg by Henry Miller himself, I'd explain more but wouldn't wanna bother you or make this ask too long, but regardless.

have a nice day! and I just want you to know your recent phone guy posts have been inspiring me, so thank you for that.

Do you mean this guy?

If yes, then I'm afraid I don't know all that much about him, aside from what you've told me just now, so I'll work with that.

So.

Since Phone Guys exist because the Five Managers were inspired by Henry's work, I imagine him creating a Phone Guy would be a result of a few things combined : lots of free time, a dead body he doesn't know what to do with, curiosity and even more petty disdain towards the Freddy Fazbender's franchise.

You know how Dave says in the third game he installed Breadbear arcade games into the pizzerias to antagonize the company? Yeah, something along those notes. One fun thing about Henry is that in the second game, Dave implies he can be just as silly™ as Dave and Jack, having invented the whole explosives-in-urinals thing. That's a pretty unexplored part of him, imo. So...Him creating a Phone Guy with a child's toy for a head and not an actually functioning phone and then dropping him off at a pizzeria or something seems in line with that.

Not only that, but honestly? He probably would try to create a Phone Guy at some point regardless, just to see if he can do it without using the technology his competitors had since, again, it was based on his work. He's the indirect maker of Phone Guys, in a way. So, what would be stopping him from just making one himself, exactly? He'd find out.

As for where he'd get the body, maybe it'd be a similar case to Steven and Peter where he wound up with an adult witness to his deeds without having somewhere to hide him, so... Recycling the body before it rots and then dropping it off at Fazbender's it is, then!

From there, it could get more sinister, with Charlie being given a purpose by Henry as well, something like having the need to sabotage Freddy's locations by being a terrible worker programmed into him since killing kids is his and Dave's domain - even though it could end up with Charlie being taken to the Factory, where he probably wouldn't just get the cable in his spine cut with a wire cutter like the other, legit Phone Guys on account of being detected as a bootleg and all.

That...Or he could just have no purpose at all. His unlife being with no greater goal in mind. Existing only because a petty, cruel man got bored and then abandoned him on the curb. That'd be pretty tragic as well.

But! That's just my two pennies 🤷‍♀️

Hope you have a nice day, and once again thank you so so much. It means the world to me to hear my work inspires someone.

[the-firebird69]

Who would ride this?

My husband says they should have a club and he said to the child he said you can get these jackets online and he said leather to be a lot sort of didn't say at least you could denim and put the club logo and have a whole bunch of them but enduro's and he said that sounds like fun and you make a fort a tree fort is it that's ridiculous so kids love that stuff and to go dirt biking to a tree fort is intense so there's going to be a lot of this and people kids are going to want to they used to do it and they're going to do it again and he's still pretty fast okay almost cops can't catch them because they go through a tree line and it's over and they have no way to go after and it's really just they want them not to drive around but they get away with it and it looks like a lot of fun the guy was negative on the radio but he said to his son just put some enduros on there so you can use it rides it all over the place and he's looking at the denim jacket stuff still he's trying to make a club he goes how about Little rascals and you can have like a raccoon and it says that's ridiculous and it's a lot of fun and you put the club stuff in your father knows how to do that I can't even comes in and it shows him because he starts laughing and it starts to cry instead I can't believe this this is awesome he said this is a great idea. And he helped him get it online and designed it and everything. His son got the website and got stickers for the clubhouse and you know something you have to label stuff so it's cool and start labeling things I mean little rascal labels and that might be the name of the bike so bja might make them that's who it is and all sudden he said this is ridiculous and reliving my childhood every other week and we are too though I think we might call it a little rascal the child's version and call them everyone wolverine and it'll probably sell so we're going to do that and we're going to make him shortly

Hera

We are going to name them that and it's perfect and it's after Kingsley and put Kingsley on it it's awesome it's going to be part of their clothing line and you make these little stickers that go around and you put the sticker right on the bike it's a wolverine and he has a couple companies but he wants to use the boys toys company and it's going to work

Thor Freya

Who's heavily involved in this kind of thing and I want one of these bikes and VGA might be building them shortly they take a while to get going but he's going to have it right away and he says he's going to use the name and my grand nephew says we're not going to let you use the name either one and he says I have the boys to his name already he says so what you haven't done anything with it so they're arguing and he's going to try and make the boats and stuff too you know it's for the small but so we sometimes and we get a lot of motorcycles in from them

Mac Daddy

The Killers but really they don't want to war with us because they have a real empire to fight and we get that it's too late. We're going to try and start this company and he doesn't care cuz we don't start anything it's true but it sounds awesome I want to be in a club and I went to wolverine and it's going to be fun that's a nice name he says everything they're going to start with the chopper but they might do the type of bike that wolverine has a little later on same format though in size it's not going to be huge and I'm going to start working on it now and they want me to open up a factory it can help it help get it going cuz I'm crippled I just want to do it myself this is a good idea actually and I'd be like Randall tex Cobb he got hurt doing it and I want to try it so I'm asking for help and he says there's like China and South America and things like that and we have connections and so we're going to start it off and Thor and Freya are going to assign people.

Dan

He's asking me to supply you I think I'm going to do that

Trump

We have a lot of friends but he can get stuff I do know what you mean to make it really really inexpensive and we need a version

Dan

You can't take my bike I guess we'll be both of us making them I'll make more though

Bja

You can put the small one on the road as a scooter with certain additions to it I'm going to design it it says how it's going to the shop right now and put a sock in it and it makes a little one bigger and I'm going to design The wolverine he's going to try and do it but I'm going to ask him to assemble them and you're right about something but you stock parts and I know where to get them really cheap

Paul sr

This idea is approved and it's going forwards it looked like he had so much fun on that thing it's not even right it's taking a break he looks like Douglas

Olympus

[thelovelyghostwriter]

Neon Nostrade ABC NS/FW Headcanons

Okay. I’m gonna do this for our baby girl because well, she has a different set of kinks altogether. 

By the way, I will be referring to KuroNeon and KuroNeon when I’m doing this headcanon. 

Rated R Warning: Lots of vulgar terms. Don't like don't read. Don't go inside a cave and complain it's dark. I will block anyone who complains.

Let’s go for the ABC Headcanons of this brat: 

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

She’s two moods: either really drowsy after a good fuck or talkative. If she’s worn out good, she will be very sleepy and just want to lie on her partner’s chest. 

If she still has energy left, she likes to have a pillow talk with her partner. 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Girlie is proud of her curves and face. She knows she’s cute and she has the curves. She’s not afraid to dress up for her man and drive them absolutely crazy. 

She likes her partner’s biceps and back. She likes to scratch and caress them when they are in a missionary position. 

If she's with Kurapika and knows his Kurta identity, she worships his eyes (kinda fucked up but yes!). She likes how it turns scarlet because of his deep intense lust (and maybe hatred) while they’re having sex. She finds it alluring, like a moth to a flame. For Chrollo, it's his spider tattoo.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

This girl swallows. Nuff’ said. She likes to be milked too. She's submissive and breedable.

She also likes having her partner's fingers stuffed into her mouth after they finger her. A little taste on how wet she is. 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

She has a bunch of lingerie shoots that doesn’t show her face. She then post it on OnlyFans to gain extra income. Just lingerie pics because she enjoys modelling for it. However, she won't show her pussy or boobs. Those are VIP access only.

She also fucks her new head bodyguard aka Kurapika and had a one time fling with Chrollo. Papa must never know this.

Good girls are just bad girls who haven't been caught.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Not so much. She isn't a virgin per se (really think one of her clients or Chrollo took her virginity), but she also hasn't gotten around much due to her father having people to guard her 24/7. She usually doesn’t take the lead so most of the time she just goes with the flow. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Anything to do with her partner dominating her. Girlie likes to get dicked down hard. So think of missionary, doggy and all sorts of variations that goes deep.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

She is very childish and teasing alright. She's not serious about it. To her, sex is for fun. She wants to enjoy it. She giggles a lot whenever she gets a pleasant reaction from her partner.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Yeah. She goes to those high-end bikini waxing services to get her pussy groomed once ever three months. She may show her lingerie to others but she only shows her lady parts to someone special and she has to make herself look presentable.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Uhhh... she is playful. She usually relies on the non-sexual dating part that her partner does for the romance.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

This girl likes to read smuts or listen to audios to get herself wet. If she really wants to get down on it, she uses a good ol' vibrator to buzz herself. She has to do it in a room though, where no one is around.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

*clears throat* This girl makes the best porn to write LMAO. I can think of a few kinks when it comes to her (and her r/s with Chrollo or Kurapika).

With Kurapika:

Discipline and Bondage: Her bratty attitude pisses off his stern no-bullshit personality. Sometimes she does it on purpose to egg him to punish and fuck her. She secretly enjoys it when he spanks her, be it using his hand or his belt. She realises that he might be into bondage based on the chains on his hand so she suggested tying her up. They used ropes, clothes, handcuffs and of course (actual, not his Nen) chains. He sometimes chains her up Shibari style and likes to see her pussy drool over the chains. This starts whenever she acts up, throws a tantrum and Kurapika has to deal with her bs. It's not easy disciplining this naughty brat but he likes the challenge until she's an obedient brat begging to be his cumslut. When she's being a good girl, he'll reward her with a good fucking and another present (e.g. jewellery or handbag or whatever she wants).

Degrading and Humiliation: This comes with the disciplining part. Whenever he disciplines her, it comes with degrading her. Neon loves to be called all sorts of degrading terms: slut, whore, brat. He's usually very uptight so it turns her on when he gets vulgar during sex. It gets even more intense when it's hate-fucking. He's supposed to dislike flesh collectors but here he is enjoying the flesh of a pretty collector, and so they engage in hate-sex filled with degrading her and Neon loves every filthy second of it.

Breeding: Yes, I know I said Kurapika ain't gonna want kids, based on my analysis of him and it makes sense. Only after he accidentally knocks her up, then he'll realise "hey, this ain't bad". So when Kurapika realises that perhaps repopulating the clan isn't that bad, Neon is more than happy to produce kids with him and be the freakin Kurta baby factory. The whole baby-making process is fun, they will make sure they won't waste a single cum drop. Neon also loves to address Kurapika as "Daddy" because she knows it makes him feel powerful and it represents fathering her children. Sorry Light Nostrade, Neon has another daddy now.

With Chrollo:

DD/LG: Their age gap and height difference screams sugar dating. He loves to indulge in her materialism and spoils her like a brat she is (he just steals those items and gives it to her). Chrollo is one freaky mf who calls her princess, kitten, baby girl and all sorts of really cute nicknames. Chrollo isn't like Kurapika who would degrade her. He likes to praise his little sex bunny because positive reinforcement works. He wants her to dress up in all those frizzy lingerie costumes and roleplay in DD/LG.

Toys: [See the T for Toys for this one]

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

One word: power. 

That is in the form of money and dominance in her partner. She loves it when they give her what she wants materially, be it that nice taxidermy butterfly necklace or that designer brand clothes and accessories. She doesn't care how you get it, but if you give it to her, she's sure to reward you.

Another thing that for sure turns them on is being dominated. Be it with Kurapika, Chrollo or anyone else, Neon loves to be dominated and fucked. Hold her by the neck. Let her know who is in charge. Make her beg to be fucked. A little possessive dirty talk will get her wet. Anything to do with establishing ownership of her.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Neon likes having sex in the bedroom or in the guy's office. She likes to disturb her partner while he's working so they end up doing it in the office. Or some luxurious hotel. A bathtub will be good too.

There's a very specific location I want to write her having sex with Kurapika. A location so messed up yet so angsty but I will keep quiet about it for now. You would need to be one creative sicko like me to guess this one. Heh. 😶😶

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

A big no is her being 100% dom. Neon is kinda lazy in that aspect. She doesn't like to do all the work and wants the pleasure/pain handed to her. At most, she'll ride the guy while she's on top but she's going to be a real tease about it, hoping that they would get impatient and flip her over. When they do, she'll be more excited because that's what baby girl wants.

Stuff like pee or anything to do with that is something that she'll never do.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

She likes to have her pussy eaten out of course. And how they make her come through oral sex. However, she prefers to give SLIGHTLY more. Just slightly. She likes to get her hair grabbed and face-fucked. Sometimes she engages in cock worship.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Usually, she says things like "fuck me harder", "don't stop" etc. to encourage getting fucked at a faster and rougher pace. Especially when they hit her G-spot. That sends her crazy. She does appreciate the slow and sensual but only at the beginning or near the end. Depending on the context of the sex session.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Yeah. She likes quickies. This has something to do with disturbing and teasing her partner while he's at work. Yes, I'm talking about Kurapika. So a little quickie just for him to relax and catch a break is Neon's favour for him for working so hard.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Yes. She's game on taking risks. She's actually the one who will initiate and explore with kinks she finds on the net. Heck, she once proposed getting fucked against the window and in the balcony, risking the fact that someone might see them (Papa absolutely must never know what his daughter has been doing). The fear and thrill of getting caught arouses her.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

I think at most two rounds. The sex can be really intense and this girl lacks stamina. She didn't go through formal Nen training (remember that she got hers without training), and her partners are Nen users and physically fit so they wear her out.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

She owns them alright. She uses a vibe to pleasure herself. It comes in handy when she gets horny during ovulation and there's no one to dick her down.

As for using them with a partner, she uses a lot of toys with Chrollo. Whether it's the anal beads when Chrollo wants to get her ass fucked while he rams the front or making her wear vibrating panties in public, she's sure down for it. She also will wear a tail butt plug to complement her kitty outfit that Chrollo instructed her to wear. She'd gladly follow whatever freaky fantasy he wants.

With Kurapika, they don't use toys except for bondage items. If Neon were to sleep with a woman, she'll prefer to get fucked with a strap on.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Neon is the queen of teases. Especially if her lover seems uptight. (Yes, Pika boy, that's you).

She'll randomly sends him nudes while he's working. She'll touch his lap/balls lightly when they're eating side by side. She'll say stuff that sounds suggestive in inappropriate timings. She'll wink. She'll roll her tongue while eating and making eye contact. Just to initiate sex.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Neon has a high-pitched voice. She's very vocal during sex. She can't help it. Honestly, she sounds like those girls in hentai porn but more genuine lmaoo. She'll moan, squeal, whine, squeak and pant with the occasional "yes", "fuck me", "harder" and all the short needy dirty talk to push them to do her rougher.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

She likes to shop for her outfits. It excites her thinking what type of kinky outfit she should buy to make her partner horny. Be it another lacy lingerie, bunny outfit, kitty outfit, she'll be sure to look delectable in her man's eyes.

She looks REAL good in pink or white. Most of her outfits are in that colour. 💖💖

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Neon has a B cup. She doesn't have those giant breasticles like Pakunoda or Shizuku. But that's understandable. I once estimated her height based on Chrollo's height and the manga panel where her head is at his shoulder. She's about 150cm, maybe even shorter. She's a petite girl. She has curves in proportion (she's not a loli, she's just small in height). But that's her charm. She's cute. Easily carried to be fucked.

Side note: The height difference between her and Kurapika (171cm)/Chrollo (177cm) is so good in this aspect (if you guys know what I mean) hehehe kekekek.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Hmm... I think Neon is mid. She does likes sex but she isn't a sex addict. She gets in the mood easily, especially when she's horny during ovulation. She won't be in the mood when she's angry or upset at not getting what she wants.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

She's exhausted after it happens. Definitely be sleeping like a baby. She'll lay on her partner's chest and doze off comfortably. If she still has the energy, she'll demand for round two or just pillow talk. Chatter her way until she falls asleep.

To end it off, I would like to give you guys some links to fanart where Neon is being hot, art by @anotherworldash :

Cat Outfit

Cat Outfit with Buttplug

Bunny Outfit Regina George reference

Neon in Shibari ropes

Chrollo and Neon

Kurapika and Neon

Neon sucking Kurapika off [Yes, you read this right]

Neon in pink lingerie

[gayoperatorgunclub]

For the ultimate ship meme, Lion and Doc? I'm sorry, I'm LionDoc trash-

it’s all good!! whenever someone sends in an ask, i get an excuse to talk/write about one of my interests! really, it makes me so happy to be able to create content that people hopefully enjoy!! 💝💝💝

General:

Rate the Ship -   Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - until the end of time, babey

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - it was love at first sight but then they started talking i do think it was some form of ~interest~ in one another at first sight, but then all that drama and lack of communication happened so they didn’t really allow themselves to even dream about the possibility of a relationship. HOWEVER! once lion joined rainbow and they talked their shit out like people who know how to cope, there was a period of a few months that is now referred to as The Four Months of Pining™, during which glaz did a lot of paintings where the subject (who usually bears an uncanny resemblance to doc or lion) is staring at something (or someone) longingly. he calls it his french period. when they finally get together, a LOT of money changes hands. and goes straight into sledge’s pocket (he was the only one who bet that it would take them this long). diana gets a brand new collar (handmade), bed (handmade), dish (handmade), and many new toys (some handmade, some store-bought. sledge’s craftsmanship can only get him so far) 

How was their first kiss? - you know how the french are supposed to be super suave and confident??? and how gay people are trying their hardest but they’re just Not Good at things????? (i know these are stereotypes but stay with me). well, with their 5/8 french blood (i hc one of doc’s parents is fully algerian while the other is half french, half algerian), and their 4/4 gay blood, they have an 81.25% chance of success in matters of the heart. sadly, that 18.75% chance of failure came into play during this situation. picture it. doc and lion. romantic, home-cooked dinner. le festin is playing in the background. they’re holding hands over the table. suddenly, doc’s cat goes into labour. all hell breaks loose. lion is getting flashbacks to his son’s birth, so now he’s hyperventilating. doc carries him to the couch and turns on the fan so he can cool off and catch his breath, before carefully moving his cat, Rayie (arabic for gorgeous, pronounced rye-ah) to the living room in his handmade Birthing Box, then grabs a pile of blankets and a heat lamp and situates himself on the ground nearby so he can help her if she needs it. once the kittens are born (they’re twins!! Sadiqi is the boy, and Amirti is the girl!!!) doc makes sure they’re nice and warm and that Rayie is recovering, and gives her pets while she cleans her babies. once the happy family is all settled in for the night, doc walks over to the couch and just. lays down on top of lion. once he’s gotten over the adrenaline of the birth, he takes lion’s face in his hands and says “promise me you’ll be more calm if we ever decide to have kids” and gives him a BIG smooch while lion’s just short-circuiting like “does he know i have a son???? did i forget to mention my son?????? also what about these kittens??? are they not sufficiently childish to count as children????? DOES HE WANT KIDS????? does he want to marry me??????? wait why is he getting so clo-”

Wedding:

Who proposed? - lion. it was the day of their two year anniversary (yes i AM saying they got together the august after outbreak don’t @ me) and they were on vacation at doc’s family’s Secret Beach House. they were vibing on the balcony, watching the sunset, when lion suddenly clears his throat. doc turns to look at him and finds his boyfriend down on one knee, looking like he might flee to Bermuda. he’s reaching for something in his pocket. doc starts laughing. lion, completely misunderstanding his reaction, flushes and stammers out an apology. doc sees this, and immediately stops, though he’s still smiling gleefully as he catches lion by the biceps, then reaches into his own pocket and pulls the ring he was going to give olivier. they exchange rings, giggling like little kids, and spend the rest of the night making out on whatever surfaces are available. 

Who is the best man/men? - for lion? montagne. (his son is the ring bearer and doc’s niece is the flower girl). for doc? rook. he’s so happy he gets to participate in his dad’s wedding

Who is the bride’s maid(s)? - for lion: finka. for doc: twitch

Who did the most planning? - both of them!! do you know how hard they worked to ensure the ceremony was valid in the eyes of both of their religions

Who stressed the most? - s e e  a b o v e

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - lion’s parents. they tried to call him during the reception but doc’s grandma grabbed his phone and started cussing them out, talking about dishonor and how they tried to disown him so they’re not his parents anymore, and besides, his new family absolutely adores him, so really, it’s their loss. once she hangs up, she pulls lion into a hug and he calls her his favorite, if only, grand-mère

Sex:

Who is on top? - who’s topping? lion. but sometimes doc gets bitchy so he gets to set the pace if you know what i mean

Who is the one to instigate things? - they are both lowkey horny 24/7 so 👀👀👀

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now (only because they do get to see each other fairly often. if one goes on a long mission without the other, once they get back they will bump it up to a 10 real quick)

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - idk long enough ig. maybe longer if someone feels they’ve been left ~unsatisfied~ they might go a few more rounds ;))

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - ok it depends on what they’re doing but usually it’s one or two each, but on ~special~ occasions it’s either doc getting edged and denied for hours, OR doc getting forced to come over and over again until he’s begging for something, whether it be more or a goddamn break even he isn’t really sure. either way he’s crying and lion is consistently asking if he needs to safeword and otherwise checking in because they may like it rough but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - unless someone’s hormones and organs get fucked, zero

How many children will they adopt? - probably none?? idk they’ve already got lion’s son and they’re both busy enough with work so

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - NEITHER!!!!! DISGUSTANG!!!!!!!!!

Who is the stricter parent? - god i wanna say both. like lion and his attachment to rules??? but doc and his Mom Friend energy????? but ig lion BUT HE’S NOT STRICT TO THE POINT HE’S A BUZZKILL OR ANYTHING HE’S JUST RESPONSIBLE (he will NOT allow his husband and son to go vandalize the property of some islamaphobic brits, as much as he agrees with the sentiment) 

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - doc will only allow vandalism if it’s in the name of righteousness. meaning, he’ll allow their son to spray paint the walls of a goddamn walmart with shit like “eat the rich” and a portrait of robespierre and a guillotine, but it is a HARD NO on defacing places like the library or community center (unless he has a good reason to do so). lion spends his time praying and making sure his son knows which acts of civil disobedience are acceptable and which are distorting their goal 

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - doc. he (privately) dreams of retiring (eventually) and living out his lifelong dreams of being a househusband. so

Who is the more loved parent? - SHUT THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOW GET OUT OF MY HOUSE IM GONNA BEAT YOUR ASS. but ig lion??? BUT ONLY BECAUSE THEIR SON HAS KNOWN HIM LONGER. doc is half Dad and half Cool Uncle Who Gives Me Spray Paint And Tells Me To Make Myself Heard (to clarify, i know doc is a pacifist, but im kinda projecting my own sentiment of “we’ve tried to be peaceful but you wouldn’t give us the time of day. now that we’ve “acted out” we’ve gotten your attention, and rest assured, things are going to change.” he won’t hurt anybody, he’s just tired of having to be everyone’s “muslim friend” and educating people on things they could google themselves)

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - it used to be lion out of necessity, but when people started asking about his “wife” he was really torn between telling them that he and his son’s mother separated, but now he has a partner and his son seems very happy about it. when doc finally attends a meeting with lion, people really struggle to hide their shock. a few clunky but well-meaning “we support you”’s and “we’re sorry for everything that’s been going on”’s later, doc has used his charm to make friends with literally everyone. from then on, he is on pta duty on behalf of lion and his ex

Who cried the most at graduation? - lion! his parents purposefully didn’t show at his, so it’s a big deal for him to show his son just how proud he is. doc tears up a little too, but manages to mostly keep it together so he can support lion, who spends most of the day heave-crying about how proud he is into his husband’s shoulder. gustave just pats him on the back and tells him that they’ll run out of donuts if they don’t get to the concession stand soon

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - doc. civil disobedience, baby!! he has never been caught. lion fears the law after his youth, so he tries to avoid any visits to law enforcement. he also can’t stand to see his son behind bars

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - doc. househusband, remember?

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - doc, but only because he can be a bit of a spice supremacist. he has to get his ingredients from these very specific farms and markets or else his great grandmother will begin manifesting in their house to curse them

Who does the grocery shopping? - doc, bc he does NOT trust lion to not just sweep all of the microwave ramen and kraft mac n cheese into the cart then sprint to self-checkout

How often do they bake desserts? - whenever possible. doc and maestro live by the philosophy “don’t do anything halfway” if they’re going to go through the trouble of making a meal, it will have multiple courses. 

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - doc is more of a salad eater but only for ease of consumption with halal laws. he adores filet mignon

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - lion! maestro enlists himself as assistant head chef after walking into the base’s kitchen one day to find lion covered in flour and lying facedown on the floor, crying

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - also lion! though he’s memorized doc’s order at all of their favorite restaurants, so he usually just gets take out and puts on a big show of being a “tired housewife who works in the kitchen all day just for this one meal” and setting up the table so it’s all nice and romantic

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - lion. he tried crème brûlée once. never again 

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - lion. organization is everything to this man. doc helps with laundry and such, but for the most part he leaves organization to lion and his systems (think leslie knope levels of planning and organization)

Who is really against chores? - neither! they both understand that teamwork makes the dream work, baby!!

Who cleans up after the pets? - doc, since lion’s already asked him which color hanger should represent “clothes i can tear off my husband before we fuck” and he needs a Moment

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - neither. they don’t own a broom

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - lion because of the deep-seated catholic urge to appear perfect in front of others, and doc because people will gossip, olivier!

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - lion. he immediately called doc into the room and asked “is this your stash of drug money?” doc, who had been asleep because it was 3 in the morning on a saturday, just stares at him

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - it is so bold to assume they don’t shower together to “cut costs”

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - lion is known in their neighborhood as the man who walks cats. there is a facebook page where people post pictures of him walking his cats. vigil is an admin

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - LITERALLY EVERY HOLIDAY GETS DECORATIONS. lion makes his own for the muslim holidays since there really aren’t many “of good quality” in stores. when they first started dating, doc came home to find his house covered in ramadan decorations, and lion standing precariously on a ladder, trying to string up fairy lights while learning how to pronounce important arabic words. needless to say, doc cries

What are their goals for the relationship? - mutual joy and contentment!!!! 

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - doc. he’s sleepy

Who plays the most pranks? - lion, but they’re stupid ones like replacing certain pictures with danny devito. doc gets back at him by replacing pictures of jesus with ewan mcgregor, and putting yoda into his nativity scene. lion doesn’t notice

[walkingshcdow-a]

I saw a ship meme so I'm HERE WITH JANE AND VICTOR [Frankenstein. Her husband.]

Ship HCs | Not Accepting!

General:

Rate the Ship -   Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - Probably forever, unless one of us decides they fail at achieving immortality. 

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - I think it might be fair to say.... six months? We did it in real time because back then we had more free time so there were A LOT of day-to-day foundational threads that made it feel slow but if I review.... yeah, six months sounds accurate.

How was their first kiss? - Romantic, somewhat dramatic, and punctuated with comedy. Very nice. 

Wedding:

Who proposed? - V I C T O R

Who is the best man/men? - Probably Igor? Did they have a bridal party?

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Again, idk if they had a proper bridal party. Jane’s friends that aren’t NPCs are largely male though. Hmm...

Who did the most planning? - I think they divided it up nicely, although I will say we did more threads where Jane was helming plans. 

Who stressed the most? - I think they  kept it pretty low stress, all in all. I’m proud of them.

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Is it cheating to say Finnegan? Because... he wasn’t. And he will probably never let Jane live down the fact that he will have her stand up in his wedding but she didn’t even invite him to hers. (They weren’t friends at the time). I’d also guess Victor’s dad wasn’t invited. 

Sex:

Who is on top? - It varies. NGL though... Victor is... increasingly vocal about wanting Jane to top him. 

Who is the one to instigate things? - Both but Jane is a little bit of a troublemaker and Victor LIVES for it. 

How healthy is their sex life? - Pretty healthy. Enthusiastic and consent-filled and loving.  Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? - Fairly. Some toys, some light bondage, some roleplay, some risky locations, definitely some marking. They’ll try many things once - more if they liked it.  Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - Long enough and sometimes longer. 

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - Victor absolutely tries his best but Jane doesn’t think “equal amounts of orgasms” is necessary (or... you know... possible some times. Refractory periods and all that. Yes, she has to explain it scientifically to him.)

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - I think we’ve said “one”. They’re in no rush.

How many children will they adopt? - Probably zero. 

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - It really depends on work schedules. Does Jane stay at the university? Then it’s Victor, he will take the time off for their child. If Jane chooses to stay home... well, then she has to accept the responsibility that comes with that.

Who is the stricter parent? - Jane. Victor is inconsistently strict. 

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - I almost said “neither” but what I mean is: Do you really think Jane and Victor’s child could be stopped?

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - They both enjoy doing the lunches. I think they have a rotating schedule. 

Who is the more loved parent? - Ooof. Idk. We haven’t talked much about their child because we’re postponing it. 

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings?: Victor, only to throw hands, lbr. 

Who cried the most at graduation? - Victor, probably, between rounds of pushing the kid to prepare for college. 

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Yes. Again: this is Jane and Victor’s child. If they’re in trouble with the law, it’s for trespassing or unethical experimentation. 

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - COOKING IS A LOVE LANGUAGE IN THE FRANKENSTEIN HOUSE

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Jane. She’s not “picky” so much as “Victor will eat anything if it’s by his keyboard long enough”.

Who does the grocery shopping? - They take turns AND go together. 

How often do they bake desserts? - JANE IS THE BEST BAKER AND SHE DOES THIS OFTEN. 

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Meat, but Jane Makes Sure there are vegetables included, always. 

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - They’re likely to have the same idea and run into each other in the kitchen and end up cooking together.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Victor

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - How dare you.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - Jane 

Who is really against chores? - Victor

Who cleans up after the pets? - Victor

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Victor

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Jane because she found the stuff Victor swept under the rug

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Jane. Finder’s keepers, Victor. 

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Jane

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - They’re cat people. 

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Twice. Once for Halloween and once for Christmas. 

What are their goals for the relationship? - Stay in love every day, explore the world together, and maybe raise the dead along the way.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Victor does this every few Saturdays, once he’s crashed and burned. 

Who plays the most pranks? - They both do, but I think Victor starts it.