#anyways thinking something is gross is not a phobia

[barksbog]

getting blocked speed run

[genderkoolaid]

What do you think about the concept of "since kink and porn is an art form, you should be able to critique it like an artform" (but like, with actual critique rather than just kink-phobia AND ALSO don't critique someone's specific piece of art if they didn't ask you to, like we're still applying the basic rules of art critique to this).

In the same way you would examine and criticize someone animating a character saying something violently transphobic, you would criticize someone for making violently transphobic porn. (Of course there is nuance to this, just because a character says something violently transphobic doesn't mean the creator is transphobic in that and same with violent transphobic porn)

But I guess in order to get to that point, we need to get past the "it's not morally pure" and "you're gross for liking that" type shit in order to do that in a healthy way. Because I believe there is a healthy and honest way to critique porn and what kind of message people are putting out into the world with porn (oddly enough, porn can be used as propaganda), but I don't think we as a society are ready to do that with the current state of puritanism.

I would say, one, that kink =/= porn. I think it makes sense to critique porn like an artform, but kinky sex in private is, y'know, private, so it would be weird to try and artistically critique someone's sex life. Not all kink exists for public consumption & it private kink shouldn't be judged like its inherently meant to be consumed by the public. Porn, on the other hand, is meant to be viewed (for purposes of arousal), and that includes kinky porn. (Also, we can critique the way people do kink, but I don't think that should be compared to how art is critiqued yk? Like there's a difference between artistically critiquing movies about sports and critiquing the way sports are played. And when it comes to interpersonal relationships it should really be left to people actually involved in the situation since they know their needs best.)

I definitely think there's merit in critiquing porn in an artistic sense. But it definitely has to be done from a perspective outside of "this is depicting a Bad Thing and making it seem like a Good Thing, therefore its Bad." Personally, I think more should be done to emphasize the kink aspect of kink- a lot of CNC porn removes the context of kink, which is extremely important for not only engaging in but just understanding CNC. If you listen to people who have rape kinks & engage with them in healthy ways, its very clear that part of the arousal is the fact that its in a kinky context, and the knowledge that you either have power taken away or are given power based on mutual trust. I said this before in another post but I think a lot of the negative things attributed to kinky porn itself comes from people consuming it without having any kink education to put that porn in context. But this has to come alongside systemic changes to how we approach kink and sex in general, and make it easier for people to get educated about these things in an open way. I very strongly feel that we should have some kind of at least surface level kink education in sex ed- by "surface level" I mean, at the very least, getting the concepts of "scene" "safeword" "soft/hard limits" "SSC/RACK" "aftercare" etc. into the general consciousness.

Anyways, the point is that if your critique only goes as deep as "this makes rape seem good, and thats harmful!" then its not a very good critique. But something like "the choking method used is dangerous and shouldn't be encouraged" or "this video showed the discussion of safewords and limits before the actual scene, which emphasis that its a scene & encourages good communication" could be very helpful.

But also, why limit porn critique to that? I wanna see people writing articles about the camera angles & the talents of the performers.

[emelinstriker]

OK first and foremost child reader, being in a situation, where they have to choose between their parents, or the champions, but ultimately choosing the champions is honestly kind of funny to me, because of the fact that thinking about that caused me to see nothing but giving the parents a smug look that says ha ha they chose us over you before ultimately, leaving with the reader and the other champions.

Secondly, how would the champions react if the reader had a phobia of some kind maybe the reader is afraid of clowns or spiders, or slugs (I’m gonna be honest I actually was kind of scared of slugs when I was a little girl nowadays they just gross me out) or maybe even heights!

I'd say the smug look is guaranteed coming from Macaque. Also Nezha, but he usually wears his mask so one wouldn't really see it anyway lmao- Ao Lie would also be lowkey smug about it, but is a lot better at hiding it.

And on the topic of phobias, the boys usually try to make sure their Master stays comfortable. So if they have a phobia the group knows about, expect them to avoid putting their Master in a situation that would make them panic.

Some walls may have had some dents and holes here and there from spiders or something around the palace due to someone's arachnophobia.

[jokers-bat]

All My Joker Headcanons (that I have so far, mostly involving 2004 Joker and UTRH Joker)

Warning, this is long but I hope you like it anyway!

2004 Joker

Likely has experience in gymnastics or dancing at some point in his past (possibly in childhood or teen years). That, or he was a theater kid.

Is capable of doing SOME good…As long as there’s something in it for him!

Can wear shoes and/or socks but prefers not to because he’s more confident when barefoot.

Chaotic evil…With maybe a small pinch of empathy?

Takes very good care of his hair. Will sometimes steel shampoo, conditioner, hair brushes, combs and other hair products to keep it clean and healthy. 

You know he’s sad or upset when he goes for hours without laughing. 

He’s often mistaken for being clueless or ignored and dismissed as some find him annoying, but he’s actually very observant and a lot smarter than others give him credit for. 

Knows Arkham Asylum inside and out…No matter what kind of cell they put him in, he always figures out how to escape. It’s like a game or puzzle to him!

He’s your best chance at escape if you and him are ever imprisoned somewhere.

He and Penguin are rivals…But he is the closest thing to a friend he’s ever had and he’s not good at expressing that.

Side note to that, he’s not good at socializing or at making or keeping friends. He’d rather pull pranks than simply ‘hangout’ with people. He’s surprised when Harley or his thugs sticks around but is secretly relieved that they did and do.

…Sometimes he’s lonely…

Still has no memory of the whole ‘Gotham cemetery’ incident, but he doesn’t like people touching his neck now. The idea of someone putting their mouth on his neck terrifies him. Penguin and Batman are the only ones who understand it though. 

Hides in his room or cell when he cries. He has a lot of bad memories with people seeing him vulnerable and doesn’t trust anyone to see him in that state. 

Under The Red Hood/Death in The Family Movies Joker 

Remember that friend your mom used to ask if you’d jump over a cliff for if they told you to do it? Yeah, HE’S that friend! 

Whatever you do, DO. NOT. Tell him you’re not afraid of anything! He will take that as a challenge and try to figure out what scares you! 

Don’t TELL HIM your phobias either! Chances are, he’ll use them to prank you. 

Side note, nothing scares Joker…Nothing really grosses him out either…You could get sick and throw up on or near him and he won’t judge you for it, but he’ll NEVER let you forget it either. 

Nuclear evil and a certified asshole.

If he considers you a friend, he’s your bodyguard for life…Seriously, he’ll offer to kill anyone who bullies or harms you. 

Not gossipy, but loves witnessing drama and absolutely will not help the situation. For example:

Y/N: “Joker, do something!!” 

Joker: “I am doing something!” (heats up popcorn in the microwave) 

He loves his crowbar and thinks he can solve most problems with it. Usually anything that could involve hitting someone with it or use it to break into something.

You know it’s bad and/or you’re in big trouble if Joker is concerned.

Secretive about his own past. Open about his brief time as the Red Hood, but nothing before that. Either he doesn’t remember his life before that or he keeps it to himself. 

Finds everything funny. Life is never boring for Joker!

No one knows if he feels sadness, fear, or regret. If he does feel them, he doesn’t show it…

Reliable horror movie buddy! Will watch scary movies with you any day and will aways bring snacks.You’ll scream, but he’ll laugh. For him, horror is comedy!

When you call him, his response is somewhere along the lines of: “Whatever it is, I didn’t do it!” or “It wasn’t me!”

Never give this man anything made out of glass!

One of the few who can stay calm and level-headed in serious situations. 

Usually gives unhelpful and borderline homicidal advice. Some highlights: “Why don’t you just send him a text that says ‘Fuck you, I’m staying home today?’”, “We can always kill him.”

Other comments he’s made: “I don’t know whose crazier. Me, or the people who hangout with me.”, “Why would you trust ME with anything?”

Joker Headcanons in general: 

Being friends with Joker is not easy.

He’s the biggest asshole you’ve ever known but he’ll remember your birthday, your favorite treats and your interests till the day he dies. 

Halloween and April 1st are always an adventure with Joker! 

He might not have accepted Batman’s offer to redeem him in TKJ, but he appreciated it. The man he was before may be gone, but there’s just enough of him left to know Joker couldn’t change that easily. 

That same part of him hates himself and what he’s become more than anything else. 

More than likely has a lot of unresolved issues. Past traumas, possibly mental health issues, etc.

Even if Joker did accept Batman’s offer and genuinely wanted to redeem himself, he has so many bad habits to get rid of and even more demons to face. Not necessarily impossible, but would be extremely difficult and might not be completely successful. 

If he has any family, he doesn’t have contact with them. Mostly for their own safety, not putting it past his enemies to go after them for revenge against him, but more so because he doesn’t want them to know who he is or what he’s done (basically, they think he’s dead and don’t know he’s become the Joker). 

Even if someone DID care about Joker and he cared about them, he’d drive them away because, one, he doesn’t himself (either he’ll hurt them or they’ll somehow get hurt because of him), two, he knows he’s dangerous and that he’s an evil monster and doesn’t think anyone could or would actually care about him, and finally, being hated and feared is easier than navigating relationships. 

He does in fact have feelings for Batman but it’s very complicated.

Joker should really have a non-lethal, non-criminal hobby-and he probably does…But he doesn’t have enough free time to do them…

He’s the guy who’d piss off politically powerful people just for the fun of it.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Can I get Centipedes x Ragatha? (it’s a joke)

Ragatha and centipedes

jokes on you im going to entertain this because im feeling a little silly. going to be all over the place since its just a bunch of random stuff tying in with the general centipede idea future admin here VV did not think i would need to put a cw on this but this genuinely made me feel bluuuuuugh and yucky so uh. CW on talk about bugs and vague talk of infestations because the admin tried to make a hc on why ragatha is scared of centipedes in particular (admin realizes their phobia of bugs is worse than they thought by the end of writing it they just thought they had arachnophobia LMAO) not even going to bother to tag this

i think its centipedes specifically that ragatha doesnt like. shes okay with spiders, shes fine with flies, hell shes okay witih silverfish (which arguably are just as gross if not grosser than centipedes). its something about centipedes in specific she hates. maybe its the legs. its gotta be the legs

or maybe theres something else? honestly i can see her getting her little fear of the things from a prank by jax gone terribly wrong, or perhaps even an in house adventure

or maybe she experienced something with them in her real life that, despite her losing her memories, she fears the bug down to her very core. something that shook her so deeply, engraining itself into her psyche, enough to carry on even after losing everything that once made her her when she put on the headset

okay jokes aside, originally i was going to go on a tangent about how that maybe her fear came from a really bad IHA.. but now that i think about it, the idea of her going through something in her real life makes more sense. plus as much as i write about jax putting centipedes in her room i dont think he actually did... but what i have cooking in my brain far exceeds the cruelty jax would dare dish out

i dont know about you but infestations can quickly instill a fear in you. i would know personally because when i was younger roaches and silverfish were common in my house hold, especially during wetter times of the year. also crickets. and woop the admin hates all three of those bugs, deeply. can you imagine going into the bathroom as a small child, only to get up and see a roach as big as your hand just chilling in the toilet bowl. do you know what that does to a person

cue that one post where op said they were taking a dump and they poked a weird spot on their wall only to watch in horror as a hoard of silverfish started spilling out of it

genuine fear of mine i hate silverfish kid me used to avoid the bathroom because of them

so anyways with the power of my self projection, im going to apply the same idea to ragatha. maybe she lived somewhere where centipedes were common. sure they might not have been the huge gnarly ones that we all think of when we hear about these things, but i think even the smaller ones would do her in after enough time. could be a large amount of house centipedes but as stated above, it would probably drive you insane after you see enough of them for long enough

shrugs

okay psychological torment aside i dont think theres really any curing her fear if we're following this hc, like maybe you can help her build a tolerance to having them around but to actually get rid of it fully? yeah no thats going to take a lot more than you can give her in the digital circus

will NOT pick up a centipede you try to get her to hold, you could have the best intensions and it can be the cutest one ever in existence

i was going to add a lot more to this post and make this comically long but my skin is crawling (pun intended) at the images ive just put into my head. genuinely feel yucky inside

[mxldito]

character info sheet.

name.

Coyote Menendez

name meaning.

A name chosen on a whim, there is a lot of symbolism that turned out to be attached to it. Coyotes are seen as cowardly pests by some, an honorable animal to be revered by others. They're intelligent tricksters and symbols of sexuality within their cultural background. That's something that deeply resonates with them.

alias( ses ).

They've had a few, though they're usually throwaways that they promptly forget.

two pictures you like of your character.

three headcanons you never told anyone.

i : During their life as a human, Coyote had a crush on a coworker of theirs named Morris. They were often frustrated with his spinelessness, despite this they constantly defended him. Nothing ever came of their feelings anyways. ii : Coyote never acknowledged their queerness until they became a vampire. They'd feel things, both in terms of sexuality and gender, and push it down so as to not have to grapple with it. This probably only contributed to their misery. iii : Coyote was a bowlcut baby. Lmao.

three things your character likes to do in their free time.

i : People watching ii : Journaling about feeding iii : Stealing street signs with Morgan.

three people your character loves.

Morgan O'Broin - He's their muscle, rock, partner in crime, and confidant. There's a mutual understanding between them that I don't think Coyote's had with anybody else. Their friendship is so sincere, funny, and loving in an unorthodox way. They love grossing him out with dirty jokes, he loves physically pestering them. Coyote considered his friendship one of the greatest instances of luck they've experiences.

Agape Dacosta - She was one of Hugh's Childer and his wife. Being older, she often looked over Coyote and was the one of the only ones to calm them down during their rages and panics. She was more Sire to Coyote than Hugh was, teaching them ways of hunting and Auspex where he'd refuse. They haven't seen each other since Coyote was kicked out. She's since run away from Hugh, but Coyote's affection for her remains. They keep her in their prayers.

Themselves - Something of a cop out, I know, but they really mean it when they say it. Coyote's human life was a long series of self loathing, denying themselves identity and joy for fear it wouldn't last. Eternity lies before them, but now they know who they are and what they're meant to do. This new existence, this new skin, this new perspective, they're so fucking in love with it. They can face themselves and smile about it. They'll never let anybody rob them of this love.

two things your character regrets.

i. Coyote occasionally finds themselves regretting getting involved with Hugh. Admittedly, the first time they met him, they knew something was off about him but they ignored the feeling. They've grown almost comfortable with vampirism, but the way that it happened to them and how they were treated afterwards is a different story. If they could've chosen to be Embraced by somebody else, they would.

ii: There was a girl who died. Coyote and their Coterie didn't kill her but they led her to her death. Being so caught up in trying to complete tasks for somebody else, they didn't say anything when they had the chance to. They didn't want to disappoint. But the manner of that girl's death haunts them. It wasn't a clean or short one. She died twice.

three phobia's your character has.

i. Fire. Small flames are nothing, but full-sized blazes are another story. ii. Losing control. They don't want to face catatonia ever again. iii. Failure. Losing everything they're worked for would set them over the edge.

Tagged by: @godpyre (Thank ya!! :3)

Tagging: @yunalai @ratwhsprs @fangmother @sortilegum @charmantevamp @r3dblccd @twyred and you!

[spainkitty]

okay i need the deets about your surana-lavellan i am so intrigued 👀🙏 -merrybandofmurders

@merrybandofmurderers

I'll have you know, I am OBSESSED with my Surana-Lavellan. I am OVERJOYED to tell you, every single one of my lurking followers, and the whole world all about her. 🥰🤩😍 Welcome to my Very Long Post to justify having Surana as my Lavellan!!

Okay! It starts with: I didn't put enough memory on the MS side of my Mac laptop 😅

I played DAO with my Cousland, went on to play DA2, but I went back and started my Surana file for funsies and Tabris as well. Just because I love building characters and I wanted to experience the other Origins. I fell IMMEDIATELY in love with my Surana. I played her with high Willpower, a bit of a bully and an arrogant one at that, who'd drunk the Chantry Kool-aid and was going to slowly, as she ventured out into the world, realize the Kool-aid was gross, and she and all mages deserve better. However, before I even finished the first few Main Quests (I think I did Broken Circle and Orzammar), I finished my DA2 playthru and my friend helped me set up for DAI.

This is where the lack of memory on my laptop comes in. I had to delete my Origins file to make room on my laptop for DAI. I didn't want to close down the entire partition and re-allot the memory so I just deleted everything but DAI. I was so sad and upset, I remade my Lanil Surana as Lanil Lavellan and added an entire amnesia-ridden backstory for her 🤣 Her personality and character growth was going to be along the same lines, and her appearance, of course. And then I set sail on DAI~

Basically: During Origins, someone *coughCullencough* helped her escape during Uldred’s Uprising and she couldn't get back. She barely escaped through a tunnel in the storage rooms full of giant spiders (a little bg for her DAI phobia 😉) and wandered around poisoned and pissed off with vague plans to go back home anyway when the Sabrae Clan picked her up. She ended up leaving with them instead to the Free Marches, but after everything with Uldred, didn't trust Merrill enough to stay. The blood magic and the demon on Sundermount scared her, especially since she's still a little Kool-aid drinker at heart at this time. Marethari eventually sent Lanil off to the Lavellan Clan and Lanil became a Second. Mainly because she was highly educated and a Healer with spells she could teach that they would never have heard of. Her becoming First was out of sheer moxie. She refuses to let anyone tell her she can't do something and she'd always been rather ambitious, aiming and being groomed for First Enchanter most of her life.

Along the way she does actually grow and change. She starts to care a lot more about elves and Elvhen, becomes fascinated by this history that was denied her during her Chantry-filled life, and throws herself into the culture with wide eyes. It's about more than being powerful, it's about wanting to use that power to make things better, to protect the People that have welcomed her and her magic and made her feel like she finally had a family. (Dregs of this inform who she is as an Inquisitor.)

Then, the Conclave. She's sent because she's Chantry-educated and knows the lay of the land well. She's FROM there; she has studied the geography and knows the politics. She can blend in better than any of them. When she and the Divine are blown into the Fade, though, the Nightmare doesn't just take her memories of that night and Corypheus, it took ALL of them. She had nearly nothing left and doesn't even know her own name for most of her story. She's just Lavellan, because Leliana found her belongings and the only personal information included was the Clan name: Lavellan. Dorian (I think? It might have been Sera) eventually dubs her "Lane" and she responds to it automatically. She doesn't get her memories back until after Into the Abyss, of course, which I played AFTER Wicked Eyes Wicked Hearts, and after her relationship Cullen was already pretty deep and "locked in".

I had a lot of fun with writing her and Cullen's first meeting and then after she figures out who she really is 🤣 Cullen definitely gaslit himself into thinking he's crazy for noticing how similar they looked/acted. Since she was much older, heavily scarred, and had vallaslin (and amnesia, so even her personality was affected in a way), he told himself he was being stupid, how could Surana be a Dalish elf now? She's probably dead and his one truly rebellious act was for nothing. Lavellan just looks *a lot* like her. Don't be so racist, Rutherford! Surprise! It's really her! 🤣🤣🤣 (tbf, they did only know each other for a year, and even then, it wasn't like they knew each other well)

She starts off DAI ruthless and stubborn as hell, aggressively doing the Right Thing and taking everyone along with her. She consolidated as much power as she could, and does everything possible to make the world better for mages and elves, but she's not exactly wise or clever and makes some truly upsetting mistakes. Learning to rely on others, to be vulnerable, and to care more about the small, important details rather than the Big Picture is how she grows. Although she never quite shakes her knee-jerk aggressive and stubborn-jackass personality, she does soften slightly and learn empathy. The Iron Bull's betrayal much later shakes her down to her core, and it's the main reason why she chooses to save and forgive Solas instead of kill him in the end. She doesn't want to let down and lose another close friend like she did the Iron Bull.

[mayonezroulette]

So I have a new Table Top RPG that I backed on kickstarter that I want to run called Slash! Which calls itself the Horror Movie Roleplaying Game. It can have from 1 player to 5+ players. It can have anywhere from 1 session (2-5hrs) to 3+ Sessions (10+hrs). There's 3 acts where your character gets to choose abilities and reroll for luck as well as have character growth, which is where sometimes your traits change to more represent how you play the character. Like Act 1 you start as headstrong and brave, but instead of barging in head first in situations, you have your character sneak and hide, then Act 2 you might instead get practical or cowardly as a trait to replace headstrong and/or brave. I think it's really cool. I have two ideas/campaigns I'm thinking of running and I'm looking for players. I don't know how I want to set up or what to use for an application if anyone wants to join so if anyone has any suggestions that's be appreciated. It'd simply be an application asking for age, name, pronouns, what you are comfortable and not comfortable with in horror, and if you are okay with like LGBTQ+ themes if they come up. It is a horror game so like certain themes like death and phobias and gore will probably come up, but depending on peoples thoughts and feelings about certain topics I can easily gloss over details that might gross people out or make them uncomfortable. I also have somethings myself that I won't have happen in the game because I personally don't like certain topics or horror tropes kind of deal. It's one of those things if I do this we'll have a session 0 to discuss this stuff, lay down boundries, and also figure out the relationship web, and decide what game idea everyone wants to run. Me and my froend Stacie literally came up with a trilogy for a horror movie frenchise we thought would be cool called the The Seamstress. The other one would be your typical slasher like film with some of my OCs I have created for a horror movie like comic I want to make. They each have different settings and stories that I hope some people will find fun and kind of scary. Anyways, if anyone would be interested in signing up let me know. I'll figure out what to do for an application. We'd be using Roll20 most likely for running the game. Also if people wanted I could make a Discord server so people could chat and show off art of their characters and the such. Also I could write notes for everyone after each session where they won't get lost too.

[dromaeo-sauridae]

Which should I do for my science assignment

THIS IS SO DIFFICULT IDK WTF ID CHOOSE

uhhh i love annelids cuz they have polychaetes, my favorite type of worm 💛 theyre really cool

IF YOU GO WITH ARTROPODS, YOU COULD RESEARCH EURYPTERIDS (SEA SCORPIONS) THOSE GUYS ARE WILD.

echinoderms are also really cool, idk much about them but researching a radially symmetric animal sounds like itd be a lot of fun

SPONGES ARE CRAZY EVEN IF YOU DONT GO WITH THESE ID SUGGEST READING ABOUT THEM ANYWAY. CUZ THEYRE CRAZY.

idk too much about flatworms but they are WEIRD animals. theyd be a really cool subject i think

i have kind of a phobia around parasites so nematodes gross me out but if you dont mind reading about worms inside your body theyre really interesting. thats all i have jsjfjej i do not enjoy looking at them

CHORDATES UM. WELL THATS KIND OF A BIG SUBJECT. i would not go for that simply because everyone knows about chordates. but if you want to there are some REALLY weird chordates

cniderians are wild simply because of how they grow, but theyre also just really weird in general. thatd be a really good choice

I KNOW MARELY ANYTHING ABOUT MOLLUSKS SO IDRK. THEYD PROBABLY BE COOL THOUGH.

HONESTLY IT DEPENDS ON WHAT YOU LIKE BEST. do you like worms? annelids, flatworms, or nematodes are all good choices. theyre all REALLY different from each other too. id probably go with one of the worms just cuz theyre underappreciated. arthropods are a really good choice but theres also A LOT OF ARTHROPODS. like i said id go with prehistoric arthropods cuz everyone knows about beetles but how many people know about SEA SCORPIONS? echinoderms, sponges, and cniderians are all extremely alien and if you like really fucking weird animals theyre all good choices. chordates are chordates. we all know them. but you can find some really weird chordates out there

DO SOME BASIC RESEARCH ON ALL OF THEM AND SEE WHAT SEEMS THE MOST INTERESTING. cuz you might disagree with all of my opinions here! but i think that people should take the opportunity to learn more about something they dont know much about

with that beings said DO THE WORMS

[wild-grinders]

Opinions on Jay Jay?

Gonna have to be honest on this, but Jay Jay was wronged in multiple ways. Basically, if you watch carefully, you understand every way he was wronged in each episode.

He's not exactly my most favourite, but I really do understand and could relate to him in the way that he's a germaphobe. Like, I completely understand why he despises uncleanliness. For me, it has to do with a ton of gross stories that became traumatic to my brain and it just amplifies. However, we don't get to really see why he became a germaphobe in the first place, and it makes him seem more like a squeamish-over-nothing character. At least we have better context on why Goggles wasn't good at skating.

Another thing about Jay Jay is that the animation team and even the script writers just averted from him. They don't reveal a lot of information about his home life or his interests. However, Rob Dyrdek was the one who built his character in the first place. In the 1st toy wave (Ketterville-canon), Dyrdek decribed him as a big bro to Lil' Rob who wasn't even a skater to begin with. Jay Jay was just a lone kid who played basketball with Lil' Rob, until Rob encouraged him to try skateboarding and join the Wild Grinders. Jay Jay was basically the first friend to Lil' Rob before they met Emo Crys (and before Spraw l City-canon's retcon where Goggles is Lil' Rob's first best friend).

Anyways, Rob Dyrdek was never shy about writing about Jay Jay and gave him a more satisfying backstory than the TV series ever did. The animators and script writers were the ones who tried to avoid building Jay Jay's character beyond his 2 initial traits: germaphobe and becoming a doctor. But they really ended up making germaphobe the main running gag and the animators used a different palette for well-intented reason, but it backfires to a completely different shade of brown. 'Wild Scouts' was their best attempt to actually do something for his character that didn't involve his main character traits. However, it's difficult to align that episode to his values.

Honestly, Jay Jay just deserves a better written story/script. Preferably from a black person because CLEARLY the production team was had an aversion building up his character to avoid 'making bad mistakes with a black character'. It's in good intention, but they managed to do damage to his character.

Overall, I think Jay Jay needs a break from everything. Having a phobia to germs/anything gross is actually the worst thing to live with. And give him actual interest outside of his education goals and skateboarding. And develop his background and family life a bit better.

[positively--speculative]

Has anyone noticed that people who start as mostly just fatphobic tend to quickly adopt other bigotries?

I tend to think back to a time when I wasted time arguing with horrible people, and I remember on another blog posting something about how dumb I thought fatphobia is and how no one is forcing anyone to find fat people attractive (which is usually what fatphobia comes down to...this entitled belief that fat people should change their bodies so they will find them more pleasing to look at), people just want to be able to exist in peace regardless of how their body appears, and this fatphobe commented with a hair-brained statement comparing existing as a fat person to being a streaker. Turns out, this person was spending their free time looking through the "fat positive" and "body positive" tags and commenting on pictures fat people posted of themselves with positive messages about feeling good about themselves. This person would comment with their unasked-for health "advice" and "nicely" let them know they needed to lose weight.

Now, I went back and forth with this person for a while (again, this was before I realized that talking to this kind of person brings nothing but grief as they tend to be hard-headed and don't like to be wrong), and in the beginning, this person labeled themselves a feminist and would acknowledge that she, as a white conventionally attractive young woman, was privileged. But it seemed during the course of our communication, she started to branch out from her fatphobia and started to pick up other phobias. She started reblogging some pretty gross anti-Isam shit and "all lives matter" bullshit. Then, she suddenly started to refuse to acknowledge her privileges. I knew this person completely lost it when she started unironically reblogging Milo Yiannopoulus videos. I stopped wasting my time.

And I still think about this...because this person started by just hating fat people. But when you really think about it, it makes sense. Fatphobia is rooted in misogyny and racism. Yes, there are fat white men who get shit for being fat, but you simply cannot strip that fact away. So, when you have a person who genuinely believes they are helping fat people (or has convinced themselves that's what they're doing instead of straight up hating), that person is probably going to follow similar-minded people, and THOSE people are likely going to at least have some racist and misogynistic tendencies because it's all connected. And eventually, because this is how it works, that person is going to be suggested some really vile blogs... straight-up racist, misogynistic, queerphobic, etc.-centered blogs.

And YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, and other apps work the same. Watch a few "weight loss transformation" videos, and you'll likely be guided to straight-up fatphobia content which will eventually lead to other content that centers on all the other bigotries.

So, when someone is fatphobic, I always assume that they're probably racist, misogynistic, queerphobic, etc., because it's never about health or compassion (if it was about health, these people would be sharing health advice that wasn't necessarily completely centered around weight loss). It's about controlling and policing other people's lives, which is what bigotry is all about.

Just a note: I'm not necessarily against a person's decision to lose weight. What I am against is the idea that you can assess someone's health without a license to practice medicine just by looking at them and making assumptions. And I am against the idea that weight loss is the only way to be healthy. I also think we should be talking about the other benefits of exercise such as how it can make us feel. I believe we should be teaching people that health comes in different sizes and it's really none of anyone's business anyway.

[sleaterkinnie]

i love bugs but im also fucking terrified of them, both bc of like. genuine phobia and also my own horror stories. soo like. bug horror story, its about bed bugs. i was cleaning this chair or whatever one time it was like. idk one of those faux leather chairs so you just wipe them off yk? anyways i was cleaning it and i fuckng. found a bug bed nest and it fucking traumatized me im not even using this term lightly i have panic attacks over it still. it was fucking horrifying. immediately got rid of it, it was from some sort of garage sale or something. got it for real cheap (i know why now lol!!!!). got a bag from the same place and it was infested w bugs too. still scared that i have bugs even though it was like. almost a year ago at this point and i havent seen any since. anyways those are my bug horror stories

THIS HAS HAPPENED TO ME SIMILARLY I WONT GET INTO IT BC LONG STORY BUT IM SO FUCKING SCARED OF BED BUGS AND FLEAS. and if were being vulnerable abt bug horror stories rn let me tell you about my panic attack inducing bug story....my sister and i were chasing this horse fly around our house in the summer trying to get it out or kill it and it landed on our curtain and i sprayed that shit with bugspray so hard and it curled up and died and fell off the curtain which was gross enough but when i went to wipe up the bug spray i noticed this weird chunky stuff and looked closer and oh my god. bitch. BITCH!!!!!! BITCH!!!!! THAT FUCKING FLY LAID FUCKING MAGGOTS. MAGGOTS ON OUR CURTAIN. I HAD TO CLEAN UP A PILE OF NEWLY BIRTHED FUCKING MAGGOT LARVAE. i seriously nearly threw up. i still cant think of it too long without fully freaking out. anyway im holding your hand this is a bug trauma support group may you never see bed bugs again.

[purplesurveys]

1816

What's the weirdest thing you've witnessed in public? So my memory is horrible at retaining things like this, but yesterday I saw a dead rat at the sidewalk I was standing on while on my way to the dentist so there's that. 😬

If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why? Time travel. As a history buff with a major FOMO complex in terms of what will happen in the future lol, it just makes the most sense.

What's the scariest encounter you've ever had with another person? I probably almost got abducted. It was around 15 years ago, the church service I attended with my mom just ended and she had to leave me for a few moments to attend to something. That one time she did, a woman approached me, held out her hand, and told me to come with her. I was like 10, didn't know any better, and was easily swayed at the time, so I very nearly went with her until my mom caught me at the exact moment and picked me up.

Other scary encounters... just a lot of gross experiences with men. Catcalling mostly, but I can recall at least two times men have gone out of their way to lunge at me while I was walking outside.

If you could go back in time and change one decision, what would it be? I would not.

What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you? When I didn't get into the school paper back in high school, it was a big hit on my pride tbh. Writing was and is the only thing I love to do, and being told I wasn't qualified based off of an interview alone felt unfair and it made me doubt my passion in writing for a time. It was embarrassing for me, but I also couldn't face my parents at the time because I felt like I let them down. Anyway, I absolutely refused to give the paper the time of day for the rest of high school, even when they eventually came to me in like senior year and asked me to hold an editorial post.

If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Sushi, just cause there's so many different kinds and I think it would be a while before I start to get sick of it.

What's the most unforgettable dream you've ever had? I had one dream where a loved one and I got shot, and another where I encountered an abandoned baby. Both visuals continue to stick with me.

What's the most unexplainable phenomenon you've experienced? Nothing.

If you could live in any time period, past or future, when would you choose and why? The 90s so I can live through the pop culture trends of the time.

What's the best piece of advice you've ever received? Giving up decisively also counts as courage.

What's the funniest thing that's ever happened to you? That one day I locked myself out of the office, leaving my phone and laptop behind, while a presentation where I was due to talk was ongoing. I stepped out to handle a delivery hence the door closing and locking on its own for the three seconds I needed to go out.

If you could erase one movie or TV show from existence, what would it be and why? That Sabrina show, just out of personal spite.

What's the biggest regret you have in life? I don't have any big regrets.

What's the most interesting fact you know? I always like rehearing the fact that says if you fold a piece of paper enough times it'll reach the moon.

If you could be any fictional character, who would you choose and why? Monica Geller. I want to be able to cook anything I want to eat.

What's the creepiest encounter you've had with a stranger? Just a bunch of stuff with men.

What's the most heartwarming act of kindness you've witnessed? My dad coming to pick me up from Makati at 1 AM because there weren't any Grabs accepting my booking, and the Starbucks I was at was about to close.

If you could have dinner with any three people, dead or alive, who would you choose? Owen Hart, Eddie Guerrero, Windham Rotunda.

What's the most unusual phobia you have or have heard of? My own fear of catching advertisements at night, when I was a kid lol.

If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be and why? Cooking. It's a basic skill that I'm too scared to do but know that I have to learn at some point.

What's the most thought-provoking book you've ever read? I don't read a lot to begin with but the last book I read – Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 – did make me think, largely because I felt super betrayed at the end haha.

What's the most unexpected plot twist you've encountered in real life? It's my own experience again, but basically it was how quickly I moved on from my past relationship. That, and me getting into K-pop which goes hand-in-hand with the said moving on lol.

If you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be and why? Someone who lives in New York, so I can travel around New York for a day.

What's the craziest coincidence you've experienced? I'm sure there've been many interesting ones but I can't seem to think of anything at the moment.

If you could visit any place in the world, where would you go and why? New York City. I'd love to go to their museums.

What's the most bizarre conversation you've overheard? I don't really eavesdrop much but that's also because my hearing is so poor, haha.

If you could have any job in the world, what would it be and why? PR for WWE. It's the industry I'm in already, but I'd love to be able to do it for a brand that I've long been watching. I'm sure it'll be a nightmare LOL what with all the messy shit WWE deals with on a daily basis but that's the kind of challenge that makes the job exciting as well.

What's the most surreal moment you've ever experienced? Seeing Yoongi. I never thought I'd be lucky enough to see BTS.

If you could witness any event in history, what would it be? Whatever was going on in the universe (if there was one?) before the Big Bang.

What's the most valuable lesson life has taught you so far? To focus on yourself, and that comparing others' progress to your own is pointless, even unfair because we all move at our own paces.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

028 of 2024

Are you attracted most by looks or personality in someone?

Definitely personality. When I like someone's personality, they instantly feel beautiful to me, no matter what they look like.

Do you like baking?

Not much. My husband is a great baker, though.

What's something you would never tell your family?

I never told them that I was sexually abused. They still don't know and they will never know.

Are you more attracted to persons with normal BMI (18.5-25), underweight or overweight?

Weight doesn't matter to me.

What's the best decision you ever made?

Adopting my kitties. Particularly Victoria as she was the sweetest cat ever.

Most gross thing you've done?

Can't think of anything, besides things that qare considered gross that many people do anyway.

The weirdest thing people have ever picked on, about your appearance?

My freckles. I don't even think about them on a daily basis.

Do you handle sharp pain (getting cut by glass), stinging pain (hand sanitizer on the cut you didn't know you had), burning pain (burned yourself), or low deep pain (stubbing your toe) better?

Any kind of pain is meh, but sharp and short-lasting is better than dull and lasting for hours, if I really have to choose.

Out of all your fear foods, which one would you rather eat?

Pasta. Even though it's not that fear, I don't think any food is fear for me, besides allergy stuff.

Do you have any phobias?

Yeah, I'm emetophobic. I also don't like the sound of church bells, particularly when I'm alone at home and in the dark.

How do you spend your life, in detail?

Currently not working, but the rest is as usual: taking my meds, little travels around the country, groceries, my stepson's football practices, online shop.

First time you met a transgender person?

Probably when I was 21, but not in person.

Have you ever been bullied in school by a teacher?

Yeah, even in university lol. I had problems with some teachers because they didn't understand me and I didn't understand them, and I blame my then-undiagnosed autism for that.

Have you ever bullied someone?

Looking back in time, I really hope I didn't. I wasn't a good kid at all.

What's a tradition you have?

I buy souvenirs from every travel.

Have you ever posted anything embarrassing on social media, by mistake?

No, I don't even use any social media, except for YouTube and Instagram.

Do you demand respect or let people walk all over you?

Everyone deserves respect, and so do I. I'm a bit too soft-spoken, though.

[oddmawd]

is there fic-requesting etiquette i’m missing?

or am i just completely misinformed on how this subculture works?

pretty new to the n-sfw game and i got a comment on my kurama x reader piece that said nothing specific about my fic...they just said “i love this so much that i’m going to make a request of you” and then they wrote a loooooong and detailed outline of a fic they want me to write

i saw their long comment and got excited someone liked my work but it was literally just a huge fic request that involved tropes i literally can’t stand....they’re legit TRIGGERING to me, actually, and it shows how easily out-of-pocket requests can backfire when you haven’t bothered talking to the author before telling them to write stuff for you

like if it was a long-time reader, maybe i’d entertain the idea of writing something they like on request, but a stranger who hasn’t even bothered reading my work??? who doesn’t even know me well enough to know my off-limits topics?????? liiiiiiike buddy idk what you’re thinking here but this seems ill-advised

do people lob requests at authors all the time? is this normal??? to me it feels like sending a d*ck-pic...sure, you can do it, but is it ACTUALLY GONNA GET YOU LAID??? and i haven’t said I’m open to requests anywhere, so they made an assumption about that right off the jump...

ALSO, if you’ve come up with a huge idea for a fic that would be many chapters and thousands of words long...there comes a point when maybe you should think about just writing it yourself...because if your vision for the story is THAT specific and THAT detailed, how is another person gonna do it justice? are you gonna micromanage how they use your idea so it comes out how you like? that sounds like a terrible collab climate right there

AND OTHER THING, what makes you think i have the time/inclination to drop all my current WIPS to work on yours? random requests like this feel entitled and presumptuous and i’d never leave one on a stranger’s work unless they said they were looking for story prompts

ONE MORE THING (yes that is a Jackie Chan Adventures reference)...flattery WILL get you places...if you like an author, maybe try reading and supporting their current work BEFORE you make requests...i’d be more willing to help out a fandom friend than some rando who doesn’t even know what my triggers are

in the end a random request like this is asking a stranger to make a huge time and energy investment on your behalf FOR NO COMPENSATION, and that just feels wrong to me

even if requests like this are common, i don’t like it

anyway i’m rambling, but i got all excited to get a long comment...but it was just a request from a stranger full of tropes that trigger a certain phobia of mine and now i’m sad

(if you’re the person who left that comment, i’m not mad, just flabbergasted and a bit grossed out, so just...don’t reply to this, pretend you didn’t see it, i needed to vent)

[imaginethoseguys]

Liquid Courage

Hi, I need to submit a seminar paper in 10 days so naturally I wrote this 3k+ fic for Itadori Yuji girl, bye

Pairing: Itadori Yuji x fem!S/O Word count: 3.3k Warnings: fluff, drinking, drunk confessions, slight angst, au motifs Summary: No matter the chosen activity, Yuji would be equally excited to simply spend time with her. He didn’t even need her to reciprocate his feelings. He felt comfortable in his lovable bubbly state, and she most likely loved him as a friend, so all was well. Trying to take things further would be a risky move anyway and he would not dare take his chances at the expense of making things worse between them because the last thing he would ever want is to make her upset or uncomfortable. He still remembered all her stories about friendships she inescapably lost after the “I need to tell you something” texts in the middle of the night from guys who she felt comfortable enough to be herself with.

Yup, no way that was happening. a/n: Itadori's in his 20s (as well as s/o)

gif credit

It wasn’t Yuji who offered to spend the Friday night at a bar. He didn’t enjoy drinking that much, and there was some weird old movie at the local theatre that they could watch and make fun of together. But it was an unusual occasion, they were on a week-long mission, dealing with curse activity in Osaka, and, well, it was  her  who asked, so of course he agreed. He never went against her suggestions, he trusted her fully, maybe even too much. Possibly, it was her way with words. Somehow, she knew exactly what to say in situations where Yuji often found himself at loss for words. She was reliable and reassuring and had a certain kind of warmness to her.

Or, possibly, it was Yuji’s six-years-long crush on her that had him blushing and hyperventilating at anything she did, so opinions were divided on this one.

No matter the chosen activity, Yuji would be equally excited to simply spend time with her. He didn’t even need her to reciprocate his feelings. He felt comfortable in his lovable bubbly state, and she most likely loved him as a friend, so all was well. Trying to take things further would be a risky move anyway and he would not dare take his chances at the expense of making things worse between them because the last thing he would ever want is to make her upset or uncomfortable. He still remembered all her stories about friendships she inescapably lost after the “I need to tell you something” texts in the middle of the night from guys with who she felt comfortable enough to be herself. Yup, no way that was happening.

“Oh, look, they have homemade plum wine!” her exclamation brought Yuji’s attention back to reality. “And it’s in pitchers too. Lucky!”

“You do remember you can’t hold your liquor, right?” he said, propping his face on his right hand while watching her mumble giddily “plum wine and soda, plum wine and soda.” She lowered the laminated menu sheet and leveled him with an annoyed gaze.

“I am a grown young woman who earns a living by exorcising curses, I’m pretty sure I can handle a glass or two,  Yuji .”

“Including that time when you threw up on Fushiguro mid-conversation?”

“That was graduation! And we did shots.”

“Yeah, it was also 7pm.”

“Enough of you, mister.” She threateningly pointed a finger at him and turned around to call the waiter. Receiving an acknowledging nod in return, she turned back. “Besides, if we’re talking about you, everyone is terrible at holding their liquor in comparison.”

“I’m just heavyweight.” He shrugged his shoulders.

“You’re just a beast machine who suppressed the King of Curses and can run 50 meters in 3 seconds,” she shook her head at her own description, “no wonder you’re Special Grade. Why do you bother drinking at all? Pretty sure it does nothing to you.”

“I don’t do it on my own. I like the company.” He said timidly.

“Aw, see? This is why I love you.”

Yuji’s eyes widened unintentionally, but she didn’t look at him long enough to see it, her attention swiftly taken away by an approaching waiter. He assured himself he was better at controlling his feelings, but it was all falling apart now, like a bunch of lies, because he could feel his entire face and ears pulsate from heat. He stared at the way her lips moved, making the order.

as a friend as a friend as a friend as a friend as a friend

“Yuji? Yuji!”

He snapped back, looking even more surprised.

“You wanted the Ginjo-Shu, right?”

His gaze lingered on her face, open and bright, with eyebrows slightly raised.

“Yeah.”

This is fine.

* * *

“Ah, see? This is exactly what I was talking about.”

Yuji furrowed his eyes helplessly and took the glass from her hand. She tried to down her drink in one motion but missed and spilled it over herself. Looking back now, he wasn’t sure if it was her being lightweight or her not stopping in time.

“When did that even happen,” he mumbled to himself, “she was fine a minute ago.”

“Don’t talk about me like I’m not here,” she moaned in drunk annoyance, “because I  am  here.”

“So it seems,” Yuji smiled.

“And I may be many things, but there’s one thing that I am not, and it is deaf. Or stupid.”

“Yup, that’s two things though.”

She sighed loudly and leaned back on the wooden wall of their booth. They were surrounded by soft mixes of white noise: distant frying and sizzling from the kitchen, clinking of glasses, and giddy discussions of the upcoming weekend. They could almost feel like they belonged here, to the normal crowd of Osaka drinking their weekly stresses away, complaining about their bosses, bills, and personal dramas.

Is that what it’s like to be normal?  Both of them thought.

Yuji looked over at her and felt the heat returning to his cheeks. This drink spill felt too deliberate to be accidental. And her bra was very thin, and the bar’s AC was on and—

Yuji groaned and swiftly took his hoodie off, almost throwing it in her direction.

“Wear this, please.”

She didn’t really fight it and slowly put it over her head, beginning to crawl inside. She stopped somewhere in the middle and breathed in.

Ah, it smells so good. Smells like him.

She pressed the fabric into her face, taking in his scent. When did he manage to put on cologne? That’s just unfair.

“You okay in there? Are you stuck?” Yuji looked questionably at the wrinkly bundle that was now his hoodie with her somewhere inside.

“Listen, Yuji.”

“You’re just gonna talk to me like this, huh?”

“I’m sorry,” she murmured in a soft voice. “I know this isn’t how you would spend your night, but—I wanted to—you know. But in the end, I just—and—”

Suddenly, she felt a gentle tug, and her head popped out of the hoodie, revealing Yuji’s face lightened by a warm smile.

“I told you, I like the company.”

There was a needle prick somewhere around her heart, and she pressed her lips together, taken by a sudden wave of sadness.

“Let’s get back, yeah?”

* * *

Their hotel wasn’t far from the bar, but due to her condition, the walk back took longer than usual. Summer was ending, the air was still warm, but there was a tingling coldness with each wind blow,  a careful reminder of the approaching grey sky and smell of wet concrete, covered by tired leaves.

The path to the hotel entrance was hidden among the sleeping quarters, illuminated by floor lights, and framed by tall bamboo sticks. Yuji walked first and was right in front of the automatic sliding doors when he stopped and turned around to check on her. Instead of right behind him, he saw her at the beginning of the entrance path with her head down.

“Hm? Are you okay? Wait, are you sick?? Then stay right there, if you wanna throw up, do it—um—” he swiftly looked around. Seeing a gardening pot near one of the doors across the street, he pointed at it. “Here, maybe in this pot? Wait, no, this is a nice neighborhood, imagine waking up and finding vomit in your plants… ah, maybe in this bamboo? I’m not sure if it’s real though… ah, but this hotel allows hosting of jujutsu sorcerers because the owner is a friend of someone from the higher-ups, and if we vomit here—"

“Yuji.”

“Oh, maybe vomit in my t-shirt? And I’ll carry it to the nearest dumpster? No, that’s a horrible idea. Are you sure you can’t hold it until we get to our room? Then—”

“I’m not sick, Yuji!” she said loudly, maybe even too much so. “Although all this vomit talk is grossing me out.”

Yuji raised his eyebrows. “Then what’s wrong? Wait, did drinking uncover your hidden phobia of hotels? I read that somewhere…”

She smiled sadly. “You’re such an idiot.”

He bared his teeth, clearly offended. “Well, I’m sorry for trying to be helpful! Jeez, if you can’t walk – just say so, I’ll carry you to our room.”

“I don’t want to go to our room!” she yelled again. Yuji’s eyes widened in surprise, but he didn’t say anything.

“Because then we go to sleep, come back to Tokyo and—I—” She squeezed the hem of his hoodie, “and I’ll never get another chance.”

There’s a short silence after her outburst. Yuji glanced over her hands that were clenched in fists and looked to the side.

“I mean, it’s not like this is our only chance to visit Osaka, we can always book a vacation and come back here.”

“Huh? Who cares about Osaka? It's—”

“I’m not very smart,” he interrupted her quietly, “so you’ll need to be straight with me, otherwise I won’t understand what you mean.” Then, his voice got even quieter. “Or I’ll start imagining things that aren’t real.”

“Yuji, I—” she tried to speak fast, because she felt a betraying lump in her throat, “I never wanted to drag you into a bar. There was this old movie at the local theatre that we could have watched, but I—If I didn’t drink, I would have never gotten the strength to say the things that I’ve been meaning to say for a long-long time. And this trip felt like a perfect opportunity, and you’re right, I’m a lightweight and I overdid it, and I was so close to saying it, but I thought—I cherish you so, so much , Yuji, it hurts me to even think about it. I tried to tell you before, after graduation, but you distanced yourself from me that night, so I figured it was a bad idea. I still think it is, but I—Yuji, I—”

Yuji shortened the distance between them with a desperately fast sprint and grabbed her with both of his hands, squeezing her so tight that she could barely talk anymore, her face pressed into his chest. He was silent for a bit.

“I distanced myself from you during the graduation night because you looked so vulnerable. I thought you were doing things you would regret the next day, so I didn’t want to take advantage. Because when you’re like this with me, I,” his hands trembled, “It’s so hard for me not to be selfish.”

“Wait, Yuji,” she tried to move away from him, but no matter how hard she pushed, she would never win Yuji in a battle of strength. “Please, let me finish.”

“No,” he sounded uncharacteristically serious. He lowered his head and pressed his cheek to her forehead. “When you say that this is not the way I would spend my night… You can invite me to dumpster dive or read books about molecular physics in a public library, or lick poles in winter, and I’ll choose it over anything else. When I found out we would go on this mission together, I was so happy. I can be doing the grossest, most stupid, and pointless things, but if I’m with you – it would be the best way to spend all the time I have. I hate being alone, and it's all I ever felt for so many years of life. But when I met you—when I’m with you – I feel so warm. You make me forget about the bad stuff. When you’re next to me, I—I feel wanted. So please,” his hands weakened his grab on her frame, letting her lean back and catch a glimpse of his face. “Please, don’t give me false hopes.”

Their breaths were hot and shaky as they looked each other in the eyes, hypnotised by each other’s presence. She cautiously moved closer to him and cupped his cheeks. Yuji swallowed thickly, he had to stop himself, but her hand was soft and warm, and the number of times he dreamt about this exact moment didn’t let him move an inch of his body. She raised herself on her tiptoes and leaned to his lips. She smelled so sweet, and her body was so close to his that—

“Ghh, stop,” Yuji groaned and pressed his forehead to hers in agony.

“Why?” She asked breathlessly, “you don’t want this?”

“ No ! I mean, yes. God, I want this so much my head could explode, b-but,” he leaned back slightly, revealing his glowing red face, from the neck to the tips of his ears. “You’re drunk, and we’re tired and I,” he rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. “I want this to be right. If you wake up tomorrow and don’t remember any of this, I—”

“Stop talking,” she moaned and pulled him back by the fabric of his t-shirt, crushing her lips into his, arms then moving up to snake around his neck. Yuji had to resist. He had to, but when she touched him like this, the taste of plum on her lips, and when her—

“Mhm,” Yuji groaned hopelessly, feeling her tongue explore the insides of his mouth. It was hot and wet, and he felt like his heart could stop. Suddenly, he was so putty in her hands, he would do anything for her to keep touching and kissing him like this. No, for her to do anything she wanted with him. He would make a pact with a curse and sell his soul to stay like this a little longer, or to never feel the need to breathe again, so her lips can remain sealed with his forever. Still desperate for air, however, he forced himself to pull away, a shining string of saliva stretching between their lips.

She breathed in, preparing to talk. “I—”

“No, please, don’t say it.” He pressed their foreheads together again, breathing heavily. “Allow me to be selfish. I—I want you to say it tomorrow, in the morning. So that—”

“—It’s real?” she finished for him.

“Yeah,” he smiled bashfully, looking into her eyes. He could see himself in the glassy reflection of her eyes. They were bright and kind, and they looked at him the way he never thought would ever happen. He never thought he would be close enough to her to have the chance of examining just how deep and gentle they are.

Yuji moved a hair strand away from her face. “C’mon, I’ll carry you.”

He lifted her in one motion and pressed firmly to his chest. She could hear the rapid pounding in his chest, and it made her heart race after it. Pressing her ear closer, she could almost hear his thoughts. She didn't really need to hear them, she got the general idea from how uneven were his breaths and how his fingers trembled around her form.

While they waited for the elevator inside, she looked at him.

“Can I keep kissing you?”

His face heated up for a hundredth time this night, as he diverted his gaze nervously. She could feel his hands now squeezing her a little tighter.

“Y-yeah. I would like that.”

* * *

Yuji did not know that pain can bring such an amount of happiness with it. There were two single beds in their room, but they ended up sharing one of them together, which resulted in soreness and numbness in different parts of Yuji’s body. His back ached from arching it so that he didn't fall, and he couldn’t feel his right arm anymore because he went to bed while hugging her. Not that he was complaining though. He could go to sleep on hot coals for all he cared if that meant she would lie on top of him. Feeling her body next to his sent vibrations down his spine. Suddenly, he heard her groan, and his heart fastened its pace.

Nanami Kento was right when he said that getting old is manifested in small things. One of them was getting morning sickness and headaches from any amount of drinking, moderate or otherwise. She hid her face in both of her palms and turned to the side, trying to hide from the morning sun. Sliding the palms down to her chest, she was met with Yuji’s glowing but anxious face: his hair was a mess, and there was a big imprint on his right cheek from the pillow wrinkles. She smiled softly, reaching out to fix one of his hair strands.

“Hi,” she rasped.

“Hi,” he responded, sounding relieved.

“Remind me to never drink again,” she said, turning on her back tiredly. “I lose years of my life from each hangover.”

“I mean, it’s exactly what I’m doing each time, but the strategy doesn’t seem to be working.” He chuckled, slowly getting up from the bed. “I’ll bring you an aspirin.”

Her eyes traced his features radiating in the morning sun as he made his way to the coffee table across the room. He had plenty of scars across his back and more on the chest. None of Jujutsu High students got anything close to normal school life, but Yuji certainly took the cake. And to remain so gratuitously giving and caring all while dealing with so much burden and pressure—her heart sank from just the thought.

She sat up as Yuji sat in front of her on the side of the bed, giving her a glass of fizzling water. She smiled in gratification and brought it to her lips.

“By the way, can you tell me what we ended up doing yesterday? I don’t remember shit,” she said nonchalantly before starting to gulp down the medicine.

The look on Yuji’s face filled with terror and chagrin; he felt his fingertips grow colder as he grasped the bedsheets beneath his hands. He lowered his gaze in silence, feeling the heartbeat pounding in his ears.

Meanwhile, she downed the glass and put it on her nightstand. Looking back at him, she lifted the corners of her lips.

“Kidding.”

He let out a questioning yell and grabbed a pillow, aiming a blow. “You’re so mean! Never  ever  do that shit again!”

He threw the pillow into her face, and she laughed, grabbing his hand, and pulling him on top of her. Yuji positioned his hands on both sides of her head and felt the familiar heat run up his neck to his cheeks, nose, and ears.

“Sorry,” she whispered softly.

“I’ll think about it.”

She lifted her hands and palmed his face, looking deep into his amber eyes. Yuji swallowed thickly, both of his palms twitching uncontrollably.

“Yuji.”

“Y-yeah?”

“I love you.”

The warmness from her hands went deep beyond his face. He felt her arms reach out gently into his chest and cradle his heart, calming its frantic heartbeat and holding it with such care that it sent lumps to his throat. He fought back the quivering of his lips as her thumb stroked across the scar right beneath his eye.

“I love you so  so much,” she murmured fondly, squinting from her growing smile. Yuji lowered his body closer to hers and hid his face in the crook of her neck, hugging her from behind.

“If you don’t stop, I might die.”

“Why?”

“I shouldn’t… feel this happy.”

She closed her eyes contently and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing a slow kiss to his temple. “Well, that’s not for you to decide, dumbass.”

She played with his messy hairs, breathing in his scent.

“But if you don’t reciprocate, I might die as well.”

Yuji rose sharply on his hands and leaned forward, crushing his lips into hers for a quick second.

“I love you,” he said loudly after breaking the kiss. Then he leaned in and kissed her again.

“I love you. I love you I love you I love you,” he kept repeating after kissing her over and over again. “I lov—” She interrupted him mid-sentence and took initiative, thrusting into his lips and parting them with a twirl of her tongue. He moaned and gave in, moving his head to the side.

Please, don’t leave me

I’m with you until the world collapses