#becsuse I’m difficult

[rose-tinted-nostalgia]

nothing like disassociating in the kitchen while your drunk mother goes on and on about your wasted potential & how difficult you are to love.

[whatlifesendyourway]

Times go so fast.

6 years ago fake Jake Gyllenhall was every where on social media 😳

Its all about cherity or is it 🤔🤔

all thes fake Jake’s who are they. It’s really deficielt to say. The nick name i Negeria scammers. But why are they doing it.. some are for sure lowlife duchbach who want to steal your for they ovn Benefit. Some of Then might have a pure and kind heart and want to help in their ovn contryes. I don’t now.

I ask jake about his cheraty projekt in West Africa some time ago and doubted his intentions. He got insulted and mad.

J: You are the same has the woman I love anymore

I mean you are a change woman to me now

What do you mean ?

J: It’s hurt me so much that you doubt me despite How much love i have showed you my love

Oh.. i understand

J: I’m sure you do my love. When i meet you, you were the best thing i have ever know in my life and now you very strenge and i find it difficult to understand why you are like this.

Because I’m still waiting for you to prove who you are. But you are so busy i must wait for you to do that.

J: oh.. i understand you, but a lot of kids are dying everyday and they needs help. For my sake help the suffering kids

Yes will donate and happy to a little donation every month.. however we have to meet first. Why?!! You can't come up with at webside where you and your freinds projekt is described and the pictures you sent earlier of children in Nigeria can be pictures your friends have sent from a poor village to you to make sure the whole thing seems credible.

I can’t find out If you and your freinds are really worried and have a pure and knd heart and want to help the sick and hungry children or you put all the money in ovn pocket and live happily ever after.

J:i will be happe ever after besause i was once a nobody who nearly eat. I understand What it take to suffering

That i why i donate to 19 organisation

I help people in need all my life

I donate to SOS, red croos, cancer and even to less priviliage in my hood. I dicateded my life to help others

Oh. Understand i hit your soft sport. Are you mad?

J: Yes I’m baby becsuse you are not the Girl i love all my life. I want you to come back to me and be the Girl i love and Care about. I want you to donate again my love. I really love and Care about you and i want you to love and come to me again with all your heart and never doubt me again

You know What to do If you want me to trust you again. We have to meet. Nothing less

[forgiveness-in-the-misery]

Hot take but Murderface’s grandma was shit at raising him and I don’t get it when I see people have the take that he was just ungrateful. Like I’m not saying it wouldn’t be extremely difficult as an older person to have to suddenly raise a baby, but I’m also going to say she did not have to take him or keep him. She could have found another relative to take him or he could have gone into the system and being an infant probably would have been adopted rather quickly.

Like let’s be honest she only took him in becsuse it showed what a great Christian she is to take care of her gransdson despite how difficult raising a child is while behind closed doors she mostly just neglected him, told him it’s his fault his parents died, and occasionally beat him when he got out of line at all.

[stephs-bookshelf]

I decided to finally jump in and try reading The Wheel of Time and am surprised by how easily I’m reading book one, I’m on chapter 16 already and only started about two days ago.

Definitely enjoying it more than I was expecting, I was quite intimidated by the size and becsuse I’d heard the writing is pretty dense but I’m not finding it too difficult to read so far. Very excited to see how long it takes me to get through the rest of the book!

[sighfrancisco]

i keep having anxiety and panic attacks about like? being in a mass shooting or my car flooding? i think it’s becsuse i read the news too much/am on social media but i’m v overwhelmed and scared rn in like an existential and difficult to comfort way

[singlehandedlynursing]

Physical disability v. Chronic illness. Who gets more sympathy?

I bring and represent many areas of society. But I feel like this is something we NEED to talk about. I see it all the time with myself and others and I’m curious why this happens.

I’m a survivor of synovial sarcoma cancer and congentica heart disease (TOF). I’m also a woman in the biochemistry and chemistry world who has entered nursing. I’m also missing my hand because of synovial sarcoma cancer.

So which of these these setbacks gives me the most sympathy? Missing my hand.

But why? Living with heart disease is much more impairing. Having cancer almost killed me yet missing a limb, I get much more sympathy for. I remember my dad even saying “you losing your hand is more difficult for me than losing my father.”

Why? I’ve adapted. I perform organic chemistry labs with ease, insert catheters with no hassle, get an IV started first try yet people still feel sorry for me.

You know who I feel sorry for? People diagnosed with chronic illnesses. Type 2 diabetes, Crohn’sdisease, agent orange, osteoporosis, heart disease. These diseases can kill you. Missing a limb cannot. Missing a limb (other than losing it due to mishandled diabetes) for me is a sign that you survived something that was supposed to kill you. Missing a limb-it’s over and done. I don’t have to shoot up insulin or wear a colostomy bag. I have it pretty easy.

People also have the right to refuse care from me-or any nurse for that matter-if they don’t feel safe. The truth of the matter is, not all nurses are perfect. Although I’m missing a hand, I’m physically fit, mentally sound and am in a lot better shape to care for my patients than a lot of other nurses.

I chose this profession not because I’m the best in the world but becsuse I have a passion for it. I desire to be an advocate for my patients, relate to them (because I’ve been where they’ve been), I love to learn. And I think the most hurtful words I’ve heard is “a nurse with one hand? That’s not safe”

Do you really believe I’m that selfish and careless to handle situations that I’m not confident about? Shame on you. If there is even a doubt in my mind that I can’t do something properly by the book, I ask for help-which is not often.

I want to spark the discussion. Why do others feel sorry for us amputees? I no longer have cancer.

One of my co-workers is a type 1 diabetic. During a 12 hour shift, a code happened. She had been so busy keeping her patients savvy that she hadn’t checked her blood sugar. When the code blasted her Adrenaline kicked in but she fainted on the patient. Not saying I’m better than her, I’m saying that we all have our own battles we’re fighting. To say an amputee is less capable to take care of a patient than a diabetic is like comparing apples and oranges.

I ask for your thoughts and opinions. What is your thought process?

[thegoddesseos]

Trying HC! How would the boyos react when trying to get pregnant?

NSFW 💕 The angst on Noct came out of left field and left MY mouth gaping open. I am so sorry I literally did not even mean to.

 —–

Prompto - Something tells me he’d basically be tracking your ovulation cycle for you. “Okay babe, did you know that the 28th is the best day to try-” “Yes Prom, we have the same app on our phones”

“Haha! Oh yeah..okay. Well, right….. After that then the next best time is-”

“ PROM. Honey. We will work it out. It will be okay”

- Even after coming, he’d want to linger inside you “just to up the chances…” -He’d curse himself for going soft so quickly after he came. He just wants to be surrounded by you. But it doesn’t take long for him to get started on the second round.

-He gets so wrapped up in it that he’ll hoist your thighs over his hips for his final thrusts, as he throws his head back. He loves emptying himself inside you. Looking down, squeezing his cock as he slowly pulls out of you so not to waste any.

Noctis

-He really feels the weight of this decision. It might feel more like work to him, part of his duties even, as king. -He adores you, but is also nervous. He knows he needs a son at some point. His chest tightens thinking about how many times he might have to put you through child birth to get one. Three? Four? Five times? No. There’d have to be a cutoff. The thought shakes him. He’s worried. He worries- a lot. - Because of this, it takes a toll on him, and his performance. It’s more difficult for him to get it up. It’s embarrassing for him, but not you. You fully understand the weight of his responsibility.

- Becsuse he’ll get so wrapped up in the responsibility of it all, he becomes very mechanical. He’s normally a more passionate lover, but his mind is so swarmed…his eyes kind of glass over. “Noct..Noct baby, look at me”, you ask, attempting to softly bring him back to you while he rhythmically moves himself in you. His head up, eyes forward, looking at the headboard. He blinks a few times, then looks down at you. You know better than to take it to heart. It’s just this particular set of circumstances. Trying for your first child poses more concerns for the two of you, than a normal civilian couple. He pulls out, and puts his face in his hands, in frustration with himself. He’s managed to space out on you- again.

Gladio

- As someone who’s always wanted to be a father, trying for his first baby with you gets him super excited.

-Sometimes it’s all rough and fun, watching your breasts bounce as he pounds you into the mattress, capturing your lips in a kiss. -Other times the thought really hits him..the act of what it is you’re trying to do. To create. -He’ll start you in doggy style, hovering over you, cupping your breasts beneath him. But then he’ll lift you up so your back is against his chest. Supporting you like a sturdy chair, he’ll sit on his haunches and spread his thighs and slowly bounce you up and down. 

-From here, he can easily play with your breasts, and your clit, or just wrap his arms around you and hold you to his chest as the two of you grind against one another slowly rocking in this position.

Your head lilted back on his shoulder, his head coming forward, buried in the crook of your neck.

 —–

 I need to start writing these in a different order. Ignis is always part 2 after the break cuz I get too hot and bothered after Gladio !! It actually works great though since I’m still writing that Iggy 1 shot that the anon requested- so that will be his part for this!

[lovedbyherself]

I had my second therapy appt this week. I didn't feel like I scared her this time. But having to bring pooh with me to the see appointments isn't working out for me. It's not a place for her to be. I shouldn't have to worry or think about pooh in my appointment when I'm bringing up really really fucking difficult things that I'm dealing with, while trying not to break down. It awkward and uncomfortable. Obviously my child is seeing me go through emotions which are worrying her so a then she wants my attention while I'm trying to explain something & it frustrates me. Then after over an hour of therapy (we run late every time now becsuse an hour is never enough.) then I hate haveing to hold it together through my day becsuse usually after therapy I can't handle much of anything.

[jalisa-allycia]

When we first met, I had no idea how much of an impact you would have on my life. We’ve been through a lot together, and I feel good knowing that when things got tough we were there for each other. With all of the ups and downs, we were so drawn to each other, never wanting to let go of that amazing feeling we felt. That connection we’ve always had, it’s rare. We know that nothing will probably ever compare to it. The love, when it’s the most pure and true, made me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. Our love story want perfect, but it was ours and it was beautiful to us. You have been there for me, wiped away my tears, carried my burdens and yours and kept going when I thought I was too weak to go on. I owe so much to you. For a little while, I’ve been going through a lot mentally. I’ve been so down on myself. My self esteem is gone, I stopped caring about everyone, I have no motivation to succeed in life and I’m ashamed of that. I refuse to get attached to anything. All I ever tried to have is peace in my heart but I’ve been in denial, that will not happen for me. I don’t want much out of life. And that’s because I don’t know how to cope with failure, disappointment and challenges in life. “Nothing good comes easy.” But no matter what else I was battling, I made sure that I kept that quote in mind when it came to us whenever it got difficult. Just as we have laughed and loved together, there were times that I felt my lowest because I could never stop blaming myself for anything that went wrong. I have a lot of issues, I apologize and give in when I probably shouldn’t have, and I get stubborn when it’s not necessary. You and anyone that really knows me knows that I think I am the worst person in the world. Everyday I think about dying, ending all of my pain once and for all. You are so special. When you have the opportunity to show how amazing, thoughtful, caring and attentive you are it makes me so possessive over you. You were my mine, my only true love. I wanted to myself all the time, it made me want us to move forward. You always told me that it wasn’t wrong for me to want that, but it was hard for you to get accustomed to that. It hurt me to hear you talk about our future together, and then know that you’re sharing your body, that I love so much, with someone else. You spent so much time trying to explain to me why it had to be that way, and I couldn’t accept it. Things were getting better because I let myself believe that maybe by the time our anniversary came around you would make me your girlfriend. But eventually I panicked and the negative thoughts came back. I didn’t want to push for us to be together anymore if you weren’t 100% ready as well. It made me sick to my stomach to think that you would need even more time or space to do whatever you wanted in order to get comfortable to make me your girlfriend and commit to me entirely, even with how much you talk about us like it is that way. I did look at your phone again. I let my negative thoughts and past situations get to me and I did it. I don’t know your password but I used your fingerprint to open it. I am a coward for not admitting to it. I am ashamed, and I wouldn’t be surprised if there was nothing I could ever do to redeem myself in your eyes. I’m not worth sacrificing your privacy. Who would want to deal with someone that is constantly questioning them all the time? I have issues that stem from conclusions that I come up with and to me I seem like I’m right. When I’m probably more wrong than ever. Nothing that we have gone through will ever compare to the sadness I feel when you don’t tell me the complete truth. When we both know it, and I try to do everything but beg you to be honest, and something holds you back. And it’s because of how I react to things. I overreact, I have a breakdown and cry like a child. Who would want to deal with that? Of course you’d be worried to tell the truth. But nevertheless, it angered me. I refuse to ever think that things are the way they seem. I will never let myself be truly happy. None of that is your fault. I have these delusions and expectations for life that are so unrealistic. I’m doing my best to not take the blame for everything, it’s hard but I’m trying. Yes, you did some things that hurt me badly. I’ve felt pain that I didn’t think I could live through. I wish that things could’ve been a little easier for you and for me. But I’m writing this for a reason. I’m not in a healthy place mentally. I’ve never really felt “alive,” like I belong anywhere. True happiness has been a myth for me since I learned what that word meant. Other people find things in life to inspire them and they push on despite the bad times. I’m not strong like that. I’m making the decision to end things between us becsuse I don’t see how any more good can come from this. Our trust is broken so badly, I’m not good enough to work on this with. I need to finally accept my faults and mistakes and work on myself without bringing anyone down with me. I’m not doing this for no reason at all, or because I’m just being emotional. I know that everything that I wrote to you was from the bottom of my heart, I’m emptying my heart and giving you whatever is left of it. I want to make peace with everyone and everything that has happened in my life, maybe then I’ll have some peace of my own. This could be the worst decision I’ll ever make, but right now I’m deciding that this is what is best. The consequences are for me to deal with as they come. You deserve someone that deserves your trust, and you deserve someone that you can be trustworthy to. I don’t think that person is me. You may think that the right person is me, and that all of those things don’t matter and all you want is me. But this isn’t going to get better, I’m not someone that you can make a good life with. The sadness you’ll feel now is nothing compared to the sadness you would feel if I stayed around. And I’m not looking for pity or any support. I’m doing this knowing that I’m risking it all, and I will never get another chance again. I’ve left and came back too many times. I will be alone for good, as I should be.