#been watching too many movies recently where SOMEONE dies and i end up weeping over it like a fuckin’ baby

[dumplingsjinson]

List of responses to “don’t you fucking dare die on me— stay with me, you fucking asshole—” 

(tw: death)

“I love you. Now say it back.” “Please— stop talking, save it till we get you help—” “Say it back—“ “I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you so fucking much, please don’t leave me—”

“Hey, at least I loved you till my very last breath, right? Like I had promised.”

“Y-you know… If there’s any place I know I’d rest easy, it would— it would be in your arms, where I’ve always… Always belonged.” 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t go to the very end with you.” 

“Funny how I said I’d drag you to hell with me yet I’m going to hell way earlier than you are.” “You— you idiot, this isn’t the time— just... Just shut up and stay with me, damn it—”

“Just know you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“Saying this before it’s too late… I’m grateful for you.”

“Kiss me one last time?” “No— no, this isn’t— it won’t be the last time—” “Just shut up and kiss me.” 

“Ha… I told you you’d outlive me.” 

“I’m sorry…”

“Don’t miss me too much, okay?” 

“I like it better when you’re smiling, sunshine. Smile for me, please? Just so I can… Just so I can see it one last time.”

[regrettablewritings]

How They Spend the Quarantine (Tadashi Hamada, Lucifer Morningstar, Dewey Finn, Wade Wilson, Harley Quinn, & Benoit Blanc)

Just a fun (?? is that even responsible to say?) little thing I’ve been thinking about while slogging through this neverending hellscape of an extended lockdown.

Tadashi Hamada

When San Fransokyo was ordered to go into a lockdown, there were mixed feelings.

At first, Tadashi had a hint of optimism that this would mean more time to work on his prospective projects . . . But then he quickly realized that his projects mostly required tools and space offered by the campus. He could technically make do at home, but it wouldn’t quite be the same considering the garage was considered Hiro’s space.

Somberly had to clean out his lab and take whatever he could home.

Cue the rest of the group (sans Fred and Hiro) griping that at least his style of science could travel well enough to be somewhat continued off of university grounds.

Helps do delivery for The Lucky Cat. It helps him get out the house, and it’s simply helpful altogether.

Uses Baymax frequently to make sure everyone down to Mochi is sanitized, and nobody’s running a fever.

Nearly as frequent a sanitizer as Aunt Cass.

He starts most days prepared to be productive, only to stop and poke fun at Hiro, who’s almost always got his eyes trained on a video game.

Tadashi realizes three hours later that he, too, has been playing the game as Player 2.

Learned how to make facial masks with Aunt Cass. He already knew how to sew a little but frankly, making the masks made him realize he could have a new hobby on his hands. He’s currently trying to figure out how to make Mochi a little vest . . .

Lucifer Morningstar

B o r e d. A s. F u c k.

At first, he thinks everyone being forced to go home would work in his favor -- surely some rule-breakers would sneak out and try to bunk up with the Devil, right?

Well . . . Kinda? Once Chloe found out and scolded him about it, the idea died real fast. Plus, he realized he wasn’t quite fond of the possibility of being around someone who could pop up with a disgusting human sickness at any point during their time with him. Smearing their snot all over, coughing into his Egyptian cotton sheets . . . Nope, never mind, he is perfectly content having the penthouse to himself, thank you very much!

Except he’s not.

The poor bastard is going crazy by himself -- he’s just not used to being without some kind of company!

“At least in Hell, you could tell there were people around you based on the screaming!” he’d whine at his phone during his hourly video chat with Chloe.

Oh yes: The video chats. He tries to make them hourly with anyone he can get a hold of (namely, his long-suffering detective) but this clearly never plays out as he would like for it to: If he had it his way, everyone would respond in an instant and let him bounce mainly one-sided conversations off of them -- basically, what he did before all this went down.

What usually winds up happening is he gets hung up on or nobody answers him at all out of sheer annoyance over his clinginess.

Ironically, he’s not exactly crazy about when Amenadiel initiates those “family calls”. He insists it’s healthy and normal for them to do this and even calls Luci out on the hypocrisy, but let’s face it: Lucifer finds it obnoxiously gushy and weird.

He works his way into Linda’s video appointment books to help him cope with his boredom and admitted need for interactions. She doesn’t mind offering him counsel, but once Lucifer starts attempting to butt in during others’ appointment calls, it becomes an issue.

Has, at some point, gotten buzzed down in Lux and streamed himself attempting to pole dance. It drew quite a bit of attention.

He’s managed to gain a bit of a following and some companionship by streaming himself playing piano and singing. It’s not the same thing as having an actual audience, in his opinion, but it will have to do for now.

He’s never been one to binge with regards to TV shows or movies, but after the first week, he decided to binge watch every work action star Wesley Cabot was ever in.

Makes sure his staff still gets paid well. After all, he’s pretty well-off; there’s no need to make an innocent bartender’s life a living hell just because some other rich bastard fucked up, yeah?

Going off this, should he need to order to-go or anything, we already know he tends to tip as handsomely as he looks.

Dewey Finn

Kids were being sent to Horace Green on tuitions worth more than what some people saw in half a year -- of course the school was going to continue classes online!

While technically an afterschool instructor, the program is popular enough for parents to expect it to continue, and for Dewey to be kept on payroll.

Initially, he was pretty smug: He’s one if, if not, the youngest teacher-figure at Horace Green, so surely that means he’s more tech savvy than his older, stiffer coworkers, right? For once, he’s ahead of the curve!

Wrong: Figuring out Zoom was a headache, and then there was the realization of just how dependent his classes were on actual physical presence.

Plus, let’s be real: Dewey’s Internet connection was decent on its own, but craptastic when compared to those of his wealthier students. The lag is strong with this one.

Has definitely accidentally messed up the background on his screen. Somehow wound up with the Beetlejuice background and got so frustrated, he wound up keeping it there for two whole sessions.

In spite of the slight issues regarding lag, they pull through and try to resume lessons as best they can.

Tries to keep optimism by pointing out how this is a new form of entertainment they could be pioneers in.

Some days, it’s just going so wack or everyone’s so bleh that Dewey just assigns for them to watch a music documentary or something.

“Okay, kids, Mr. Finn’s hungover and clearly Summer is the only one who went to bed before 3am. So what I’m gonna have you do is watch . . . Prrrbbbb . . . Amadeus.” “How is Amadeus rock-related?” “It had a rock single, shut up. Anyway, we meet back next class and talk about what we saw, m’kay? M’kay. Over and out.”

Next class, he’s filled with dread as Summer produces an in-depth analysis of the relationship or lack thereof between character and the presence of talent as evidenced by Mozart’s abilities juxtaposed with his immature presentation and -- Dewey just can’t keep up. Sure, Summer, why not?

When he’s not busy teaching, however, he’s using the lockdown to work on some new material. Or just screwing around.

Otherwise, let’s be real, Big Boy’s living the high life in a place of his own: Playing video games (Animal Crossing, recently got back into Team Fortress 2, is trying to finally finish Ocarina of Time); eating a not very great diet; staying up late, napping at weird times; all in the name of quarantine.

If he orders delivery or to-go, he tips the best he can.

Wade Wilson

On one hand, murking never goes on lockdown. But on the other . . . He’s already technically not well, why risk that even with his mutation?

Oh, fuck I just remembered he lives at the X Mansion, never mind turn back turn back oh god give us free --

The situation is tense to say the least. There’s Wade, who’s sensible enough to know why the quarantine is in place . . . and then there’s everyone else, who knows Wade’s full of shit.

And by everyone, I “coincidentally” mean Colossus, Nega Sonic, Yukio, Domino, Cable, and Russ because the already small world of the sequel just got smaller by the fact that everyone is bound to a large but nonetheless single estate whose size has probably decreased from that of the First Class timeline.

You know those videos of the usual Quarantine Characters? Wade is somehow yet still unsurprisingly all of them, save for the frequent sanitizer. He raids the pantry frequently, sleeps at all hours, considers scooting a swivel chair down the halls exercise for the thighs, blasts video games, and so on.

Going back to the sanitizer thing, it’s not that he’s just not exactly known for being tidy. Colossus occasionally does drag him out of bed at a decidedly decent time (read: any time before 11am) to try and get him excited about cleaning up around the mansion, but it rarely ends well. At this point, the safest option is to just remind Wade to wash his hands for 20 seconds as necessary.

Has acquired a Switch and visits everyone’s island, often to bonk them on the head with a net or gift them with weird crap they don’t necessarily want. For the “friends” from Sister Margaret’s, he has somehow acquired their Dodo Codes. Nobody knows how he did this. 

Facetimes Dopinder frequently.

“Precious, you’re the beacon of light in this cold, cruel world.” “I miss you, too, DP --” “Sshshsh! I’m having a moment . . .” *weeps*

On the many occasions he orders delivery, he tips by giving the delivery person something expensive from the mansion that they can sell. Prof. X is loaded, after all. Plus, he more or less isn’t even present in this universe, it’s not like he’s gonna miss anything he can’t see/probably doesn’t even know exists in his house. The problem is, Colossus does exist and does notice and does care when things go missing. Leading to many a delivery person getting caught up in shenanigans at that weird school in the boonies that they either don’t get paid enough to deal with or couldn’t pay to make up.

“Oh, pawn shops are closed?” asks the man who looks like a skinned avocado if avocados had human skin. “Don’t worry, lemme hook you up -- I know some guys --” “DEADPOOOOOLLL!!” roars a Russian accent from inside the house. “WHERE IS THE BRONZE BUST OF THE PROFESSOR!?” The poor delivery person’s eyes widen as they realize that the odd cargo they’ve been presented with apparently holds some value of some kind. But before they can flee, the avocado man blurts, “Shit! Leave the pizza in the bushes, look me up on my Youtube page, byyyeeee!!”

In his defense, Wade does hold up his end of the deal. Much like the Dodo Codes, nobody knows what strings he pulled. They just accept it and move on.

Harley Quinn

Surprisingly compliant.

She’s crazy, not stupid: Staying at home may suck, but what sucks more is making things harder on people who may not fair so well. Besides, she’s spent time in a maximum security prison -- she can handle staying cooped up in her own home. At least home has TV, books, and snacks.

When she hears people are still going out without masks or plotting to have a protest, she strongly considers firing up the old Fun Gun and popping the next sign-carrying Karen she sees with a tit full of cadmium yellow powder.

Seriously, stay the fuck home and fuck up your own hair; this is the perfect time to make mistakes with your looks, it ain’t like you got anywhere to be or anyone to impress.

“STAY THE FUCK HOME, BITCH!” P O W!!! “JUST GO GREY ALREADY, WE ALL KNOW YOUR HAIR AIN’T THAT COLOR ANYMORE, YOU’RE THREE YEARS FROM BEING IN THE GODDAMN AGE-BRACKET!!!” P O W!!!!

Only leaves her new apartment to grab groceries and to take Bruce on a walk. She actually refuses to steal or cause a scene during this shitshow because she may be a bad guy, but she sure ain’t evil.

So far, there haven’t been complaints about the fact that she’s walking a hyena down a public street. Maybe it’s because there’s hardly anyone out? Maybe it’s because Gothamites just can’t be bothered to be fazed by it . . . Or maybe it’s because she made him a little mask for his snout.

“In this house, we wash our hands for at least 20 seconds, kid.”

Lets the forest reclaim the earth, so to speak. She was never really shaving anything for anyone but herself before, but now it just seems especially pointless.

Spends almost every day in a kigurumi. To give her a semblance of routine, she has a pink bear one she calls her “Sunday Suit.” She doesn’t know it’s not Sunday because the days just blur but Cass just doesn’t have the heart to tell her; she seemed so proud of herself . . .

Like everyone else, she’s gotten Animal Crossing. She’s trying to create an all-preppy island with a few exceptions (Astrid = Aesthetic, m’kay?)

Tips nicely when ordering delivery.

Benoit Blanc

As young and spry in nature as the gentleman sleuth would like to think of himself, he would really rather not test the dangers of the situation and go about all foolhardy -- he’s staying home!

In theory, it’s only logical and therefore perfectly fine. But in practice . . . God, he wishes he’d invested more in things to occupy himself with when home.

It wasn’t that Benoit was never home, he just never felt too much of a need to invest in a fancy entertainment center -- the fanciest he ever got was an iHome.

The beginning of the quarantine served as the perfect time for him to read over case files, catch up on paperwork, even catch up on some reading he’d been putting on hold since God knows when due to cases popping up left and right. But that dried up quicker than he’d assumed, and that’s when he was faced with what a man of his mind dreads the most: Boredom.

Finally caved and decided to hook up Amazon Fire.

Expected to use the one-month free trial on Netflix and be just fine but once the lockdown in his area got extended and he realized he wasn’t going to be able to catch up with Crazy Ex-Girlfriend at this rate, he caves even further and buys a subscription.

Fully delights at the influx of platforms uploading Broadway recordings; when The Show Must Go On put on Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat, followed by The Phantom of The Opera, it was a treat, I tell you!

Sanitizes often, despite hardly ever leaving his house besides to have a smoke or to go grab groceries. Honestly, it’s less about cleaning at this point so much as it is finding something to occupy his focus when he feels there’s nothing else to so.

Takes zinc after every meal to help lessen the intensity of any ailment that might hit him.

Definitely owns a facemask. There’s a good chance it’s from Marta or one of his relatives, and there’s another good chance the pattern is as flamboyant as his clothing. He’s delighted.

Benoit tries not to rely too much on delivery,  as he’d much rather just cook. On the rare occasion where tipping comes up, however, he gives as generously as he can.

Bonus: There’s a slight chance he might have acquired a companion to foster early on in the quarantine. Benoit hadn’t had a pet since childhood, a crime of which he was admittedly melancholic of his own involvement. However, his surprisingly busy lifestyle just wouldn’t suit a four-legged friend, now could it?

Well, now there’s time to. Besides, it would certainly ease the potential feeling of loneliness to have someone or something with whom he could interact with.

Admittedly, when shelters began encouraging people to invest time in taking home a companion, he’d been looking more for a comrade on the canine side of the spectrum -- but darn, if Duke wasn’t a handsome cat.

A lovely grey-and-white cat with eyes that matched his own, Duke has become the one Benoit monologues to (because in all honesty, the man is a performer at heart, in need of an audience to speak his mind to and portray a thought before). Plus, he doesn’t appear to mind it when Benoit finds himself belting out in tone-deaf notes to showtunes while washing the dishes: The mark of a true companion.

At this rate, he’s probably not going to keep fostering Duke when things calm down -- he’s probably going to just straight up adopt him.

Stay safe & healthy!

[tieflinglich]

Get To Know The Blogger!!! 

tagged by @sapphicattack​ TY!!

LAST

1) Drink: iced coffee

2) Phone call: to my sister to ask for.... coffee.

3) Text message: a picture of jumbo sized playing cards which followed a series of emojis

4) Song listened to: aw heck man im Pretty Sure it was some weeby shit

5) Time you cried: Incredibly Recently, lemme just say that

HAVE YOU EVER

6) Dated somebody twice: ive barely dated anyone lmao

7) Been cheated on: nope!!! thank heck

8) Kissed someone and regretted it: yes yes Yessssss

9) Lost someone special: if you mean loss in a more general sense than Hell Fuck Yes

10) Been depressed: thumbs up emoji for days

11) Gotten drunk and puked: uh. debatable? i drank a bit too much vodka and had a little bit come up but that mightve been unfortunate biological happenings which popped up as well so probably a yes?

THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS

12) Pink!

13) Gold

14) Orange??? like an orange-ish red. Sanguine.

IN THE LAST YEAR YOU HAVE YOU

15) Made new friends: yes!!

16) Fallen out of love: ive fallen out of affection at the very least

17) Laughed until you cried: oh my god yes, its the best kind of laugh tbh

18) Found out someone was gossiping about you: last i heard someone was gossiping about me was like high school man. i would hope that im enough of an Uninteresting Person that ppl dont really pay me much mind like that.

19) Met someone who changed your life: shruggo. id say no bc most folks like that i met Sadly before the one year mark 

20) Found out who your true friends are: ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ

21) Kissed someone on your Facebook list: bro i kissed like one person on my facebook and thats the One Time I Regret

HOW MANY/MUCH

22) Facebook friends: probably abt a hundred at a generous estimate bc most of it is familial ties tbh

23) Pets: one!!! i put pictures of him all over instagram lmao

24) Want to change your name: i dont get why this is in how many/much. how many times i wanted ot change my name? legally, Loads!! socially? a few times but im pretty good with Jack.

WHAT

25) Did I get for my birthday: i got a package of pierogis and Midnight on dvd, plus some hair dye and a pillow with the cool sequins on it that changes color with the direction you move them. its black and has like. iridescent colors on the other side that reminds me of a peacock and i LOVE IT.

26) Time I woke up: about nine-thirty, but i didnt get outta bed till noon.

27) Were you doing at midnight: i was like ten tabs into the bleach wiki

28) Can’t you wait for: HOPEFULLY BEING ABLE TO VISIT FRIENDS IN APRIL

29) Was the last time you saw your mom: a few minutes ago

30) Was something you wish you could change about your life: oH bOY

31) Are you listening to right now: silence because the last episode of TAZ just ended and i forgot to put on the new one

32) Gets on your nerves: when you need to eat and you remember you need to eat and go downstairs for food but forget in the middle of looking for food what you were doing and go back upstairs but then remember like two hours later that you needed food

33) Talked to a person named Tom: i knew a man with a sculpted chest named tom from like. deviantart that i added on facebook i think and i dont know if we’ve ever talked but that was back from like middle/high school era so.......

34) Is your most visited website: tombl

35) Elementary school/primary school: i went to Two of them and the second one is why i hate the song Danger Zone

36) High School: i remember watching madoka magica till i had to run to class at noon and it was a truly Magical time

37) College: i miss having a cool and dark little bed nook..............

38) Hair colour: red! bleached and dyed a few months ago, tried to redye it recently. 

39) Long/short hair: the front is about shoulder length, the back is about just touchign the neck.

40) Crush: weeps

41) Do you like about yourself: -

42) Piercings: snakebites!

43) Blood type: bro i dont even know

44) Nickname: artichoke fetish child, vodka dad, The Jack

45) Relationship status: single

46) Zodiac: Pisces

47) Pronouns: he/they

48) Favourite show: i mean i still like Steven Universe

49) Tattoos: FLEXES ARMS. I WISH........

50) Left or right handed: right!!

FIRST

51) Surgery: My leg! My lehhhhhhhg!!!!

52) Piercings: lower lip

53) Best friend: uhhhhhhhhh good pal named who actually got me Super into drawing, storytelling, and roleplaying!!

54) Sport: i think it was soccer for a few years

55) Vacation: Orlando!!!! or Mississippi??

56) Pair of shoes: tiny kid shoes???? i guess?????

RIGHT NOW

57) Eating: nothing!! 

58) Drinking: n... nothing.....

59) I am about to: read more wiki articles or Draw

60) Listening to: The Adventure Zone: Petals to the Metal!!!!!

61) Waiting for: WHERE IS SLOANE I LOVE SLOANE

62) Want to see: my friends!!

63) Want to get married: yeah sure! one day, eventually?

64) Career: ive never even had a job yet b r o

WHICH IS BETTER

65) Hugs/kisses: both

66) Lips/eyes: i mean i like/notice..... lips more........

67) Taller/shorter: i like taller but EVERYONE I KNOW IS TALLER AND ITS HELL. MY FRIENDS ARE ALL GIANTS.

68) Younger/older: older, even if its by just a few months.

69) Romantic/spontaneous: i mean. i really like a planned-out event but that can Sometimes happen on the fly........ ish............................... mmmm

70) Nice arms/nice stomach: these arent really things ive ever thought about. lots of stomachs are nice if you can See Them but like. i guess i shoudl say i am Weak for Muscle.

71) Sensitive/loud: i mean, you can be sensitive and loud. why not both?

72) Hookup/relationship: relationship

73) Troublemaker/hesitant: ive never committed a crime but i enjoy being spontaneous as opposed to finding someone who is just as awkwardly hesitant as i am.........

HAVE YOU EVER

74) Kissed a stranger: no but i got kissed by one lmao

75) Drank hard liquor: my name is vodka dad

76) Lost glasses/contact lenses: i have LOST THEM SO MUCH and then panicked only to find them sitting on my FUCKING DESK

77) Turned someone down: i mean. i havent really been asked?? so i dont think so???

78) Canoodling on a first date: i dont know what canoodling means but ive never actually been on a Date so no.

79) Broken someone’s heart: not that i know

80) Had your own heart broken: hahahahaa

81) Been arrested: no

82) Cried when someone died: i honestly do not remember

83) Fallen for a friend: shhhHHH

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

84) Yourself: no

85) Miracles: i swear to god i was about to make a Stupid Reference but ye

86) Santa Claus: i am santa

87) Kisses on a first date: ¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿¿????????? do you mean for me or for others bc that doesnt seem like a situation id be in and also dont tell other people how to date

88) Angels: poses dramatically

89) Love at first sight: lmao nah mate

OTHER

90) Best friend’s name: i mean i got a few names

91) Eye colour: dark brown

92) Favourite movie: i really like Kiki’s Delivery Service

ayyyyyyyyyy idk who to tag. do this if you want??? i guess?????