#bobba swaggletooth

[redeyeflyguy]

Wonderful Things That May or May Not Be Wonderful!!! Hey kids! You know who likes tall grass? Nobody. I mean who wants tall grass around? You know what tall grass is good for? Hiding in. You know what hides in tall grass. All sorts of nasty stuff. Ticks. Rabid badgers. Lost LEGO pieces. Random encounters. Things that can and will cause you bodily harm. Plus, tall grass will make your lawn not look as nice. It will slowly break into your house, make cracks in your foundation, and steal your life settings. So what can you do? Get one of us lawnmowers to help you out! Why! Because we also hate tall grass! We want to make it suffer. We want tall grass to know its place as short grass and we have the means to do it. Whether you push us, we pull you, or you ride us, we will do everything in our power to mercilessly shave every last blade of grass until it is of reasonable length. As long as you take proper care of us and give us a shed to call home, we will be there for you and we won 't break into your house and steal your life savings. This has been your friendly neighborhood Bobba Swaggletooth here to tell you that tall grass is evil, lawnmowers are wonderful, and gasoline prices are still way too high. Bobba Swaggletooth away. (This PSA has brought to you by a bored human being with way too much time on his hands)