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Biden

Biden also received the Chancellor Medal (1980) and the George Arents Pioneer Medal (2005) from Syracuse University.[467][468]

In 2008, Biden received Working Mother magazine's Best of Congress Award for "improving the American quality of life through family-friendly work policies".[469] Also in 2008, he shared with fellow senator Richard Lugar the Government of Pakistan's Hilal-i-Pakistan award "in recognition of their consistent support for Pakistan".[470Sony PCG-81312M battery Sony SVT151A11M battery Sony SVT151B11M battery] In 2009, Kosovo gave Biden the Golden Medal of Freedom, the region's highest award, for his vocal support for its independence in the late 1990s.[471]

Biden is an inductee of the Delaware Volunteer Firemen's Association Hall of Fame.[472] He was named to the Little League Hall of Excellence in 2009.[473] Sony PCG-81313M battery Sony PCG-81411M battery sony SVF152A29M battery

On May 15, 2016, the University of Notre Dame gave Biden the Laetare Medal, considered the highest honor for American Catholics. The medal was simultaneously awarded to John Boehner, Speaker of the United States House of Representatives.[474][475] Sony PCG-81412M battery sony VGP-BPS33Abattery

On June 25, 2016, Biden received the Freedom of the City of County Louth in the Republic of Ireland.[476]

On January 12, 2017, Obama surprised Biden by awarding him the Presidential Medal of Freedom with Distinction‍—‌for "faith in your fellow Americans, for your love of country and a lifetime of service that will endure through the generations".[477][4sony SVF14AA1QM battery sony SVF152C29M battery sony VGP-BPS33 battery78] It was the only award by Obama of the Medal of Freedom with Distinction; other recipients include Ronald Reagan, Colin Powell and Pope John Paul II.[479]

On February 8, 2018, the Penn Biden Center for Diplomacy and Global Engagement at the University of Pennsylvania officially opened offices in Washington, D.C.[480] sony SVF153A1YM battery sony SVT151B11M battery

On December 11, 2018, the University of Delaware renamed its School of Public Policy and Administration the Joseph R. Biden, Jr. School of Public Policy & Administration. The Biden Institute is housed there.[481] sony SVF153B1YM battery sony SVT151A11M battery

On December 10, 2020, Biden and Harris were jointly named Time Person of the Year.[482]\======================================

Kamala Devi Harris

Kamala Devi Harris (/ˈkɑːmələ ˈdeɪvi/ (About this soundlisten) KAH-mə-lə DAY-vee;[3][4] born October 20, 1964) is an American politician and attorney serving as the 49th vice president of the United States. She is the United States' first female vice president, the highest-ranking female official in U.S. history, and the first African American and first Asian American[5][6] vice president. sony SVT131B11M battery

A member of the Democratic Party, she served as a United States senator from California from 2017 to 2021, and as the attorney general of California from 2011 to 2017. Harris became vice president upon inauguration in January 2021 alongside President Joe Biden, sony SVF154B1EM battery sony SVT131A11M battery having defeated the incumbent president, Donald Trump, and vice president, Mike Pence, in the 2020 election.

Born in Oakland, California, Harris graduated from Howard University and the University of California, Hastings College of the Law. She began her career in the Alameda County District Attorney's Office, before being recruited to the San Francisco District Attorney's Office and later the City Attorney of San Francisco's office. In 2003, Sony SVF152A29M battery sony PCG-71912M battery she was elected district attorney of San Francisco. She was elected Attorney General of California in 2010 and re-elected in 2014. Harris served as the junior United States senator from California from 2017 to 2021. Harris defeated Loretta Sanchez in the 2016 Senate election to become the second African American woman and the first South Asian American to serve in the United States Senate.[7][8] Sony SVT131A11M battery Sony SVT131B11M battery sony PCG-71711M batteryAs a senator, she advocated for healthcare reform, federal de-scheduling of cannabis, a path to citizenship for undocumented immigrants, the DREAM Act, a ban on assault weapons, and progressive tax reform. She gained a national profile for her pointed questioning of Trump administration officials during Senate hearings, Sony SVF14AA1QM battery sony PCG-71611M batteryincluding Trump's second Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, who was accused of sexual assault.[9]

Harris sought the 2020 Democratic presidential nomination, but dropped out of the race prior to the primaries. Biden selected Harris as his running mate in August 2020, and their ticket went on to win the general election in November. Harris assumed office as vice president of the United States on January 20, 2021. Sony SVF152C29M battery Sony SVF153A1YM battery

Harris was born in Oakland, California,[10] on October 20, 1964.[11] Her mother, Shyamala Gopalan, a biologist whose work on the progesterone receptor gene stimulated advances in breast cancer research,[1Sony SVF153B1YM battery sony PCG-61414M battery2] had arrived in the United States from India in 1958 as a 19-year-old graduate student in nutrition and endocrinology at the University of California, Berkeley;[13][14] Gopalan received her PhD in 1964.[ Sony SVF154B1EM battery sony PCG-61317M battery sony PCG-61413M battery15] Harris' father, Donald J. Harris, is a Stanford University professor emeritus of economics, who arrived in the United States from British Jamaica in 1961 for graduate study at UC Berkeley, receiving a PhD in economics in 1966.[16][ sony PCG-61112M battery sony PCG-61215M battery sony PCG-61311M battery17] Along with her younger sister, Maya, Harris lived in Berkeley, California,[18][19] briefly on Milvia Street in central Berkeley, then a duplex on Bancroft Way in West Berkeley, an area often called the "flatlands"[20] with a significant black population.[21]

sony PCG-51311M battery Sony PCG-61211M batteryWhen Harris began kindergarten, she was bused as part of Berkeley's comprehensive desegregation program to Thousand Oaks Elementary School, a public school in a more prosperous neighborhood in northern Berkeley[2sony PCG-51412M battery Sony PCG-61212M battery0] which previously had been 95 percent white, and after the desegregation plan went into effect became 40 percent Black.[21] A neighbor regularly took the Harris girls to an African American church in Oakland where they sang in the children's choir,[22][23] and the girls and their mother also frequently visited a nearby African American cultural center.[24] sony PCG-51512M battery sony PCG-51513M battery Sony PCG-71313M battery Their mother introduced them to Hinduism and took them to a nearby Hindu temple, where she occasionally sang.[25] As children, she and her sister visited their mother's family in Madras (now Chennai) several times.[26] She says she has been strongly influenced by her maternal grandfather P. V. Gopalan, sony PCG-61112M battery sony PCG-61215M battery Sony PCG-71312M batterya retired Indian civil servant whose progressive views on democracy and women's rights impressed her. Harris has remained in touch with her Indian aunts and uncles throughout her adult life.[27] Harris has also visited her father's family in Jamaica.[28]

Her parents divorced when she was seven. Harris has said that when she and her sister visited their father in Palo Alto on weekends, other children in the neighborhood were not allowed to play with them because they were black.[26sony PCG-61311M battery sony PCG-61312M battery sony PCG-61313M battery Sony PCG-71311M battery] When she was twelve, Harris and her sister moved with their mother to Montreal, Quebec, where Shyamala had accepted a research and teaching position at the McGill University-affiliated Jewish General Hospital.[29] Harris attended a French-speaking primary school, Notre-Dame-des-Neiges,[30] then F.A.C.E. School,[31] and finally Westmount High School[b] in Westmount, Quebec, graduating in 1981.[33] sony PCG-61315M battery sony PCG-61316M battery Sony PCG-71212M battery Sony PCG-71213M battery Wanda Kagan, a high school friend of Harris, later told CBC News in 2020 that Harris was her best friend and described how she confided in Harris that she had been molested by her stepfather.[ sony PCG-61317M battery Sony PCG-71211M battery34] She said that Harris told her mother, who then insisted Kagan come to live with them for the remainder of her final year of high school. Kagan said Harris had recently told her that their friendship, sony PCG-71711M battery Sony PCG-61212M battery and playing a role in countering Kagan's exploitation, helped form the commitment Harris felt in protecting women and children as a prosecutor. After high school, in 1982, Harris attended Howard University, sony PCG-61413M battery sony PCG-61414M battery sony PCG-71611M battery Sony PCG-61211M batterya historically black university in Washington, D.C. While at Howard, she interned as a mailroom clerk for California senator Alan Cranston, chaired the economics society, led the debate team, and joined Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority.[35][36] Harris graduated from Howard in 1986 with a degree in political science and economics.[37] sony PCG-71912M battery Sony PCG-71312M battery Sony PCG-71313M battery

Harris then returned to California to attend law school at the University of California, Hastings College of the Law through its Legal Education Opportunity Program (LEOP).[38] While at UC Hastings, she served as president of its chapter of the Black Law Students Association.[39] She graduated with a Juris Doctor in 1989[4 Sony PCG-71211M battery Sony PCG-71212M battery Sony PCG-71213M battery Sony PCG-71311M battery0] and was admitted to the California Bar in June 1990.[41]

Early career (1990–2004)

In 1990, Harris was hired as a deputy district attorney in Alameda County, California, where she was described as "an able prosecutor on the way up".[42] In 1994, Speaker of the California Assembly Willie Brown, who was then dating Harris, appointed her to the state Unemployment Insurance Appeals Board and later to the California Medical Assistance Commission.[4sony SVP132A16M battery sony VGP-BPS38 battery sony SVS131A12M battery

2] Harris took a six-month leave of absence in 1994 from her duties, then afterward resumed as prosecutor during the years she sat on the boards. Harris's connection to Brown was noted in media reportage as part of a pattern of Californian political leaders appointing "friends and loyal political soldiers" to lucrative positions on the commissions. Harris has defended her work.[42][43][4sony SVP112A16M battery sony SVS131A11M battery4]

In February 1998, San Francisco district attorney Terence Hallinan recruited Harris as an assistant district attorney.[45] There, she became the chief of the Career Criminal Division, supervising five other attorneys, where she prosecuted homicide, burglary, robbery, and sexual assault cases – particularly three-strikes cases. In 2000, Harris reportedly clashed with Hallinan's assistant, Darrell Salomon,[4sony VGP-BPS40 battery sony VGP-BPS40 battery6] over Proposition 21, which granted prosecutors the option of trying juvenile defendants in Superior Court rather than juvenile courts.[47] Harris campaigned against the measure, which passed. Salomon opposed directing media inquiries about Prop 21 to Harris and reassigned her, a de facto demotion. Harris filed a complaint against Salomon and quit.[48]

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In August 2000, Harris took a job at San Francisco City Hall, working for city attorney Louise Renne.[49] Harris ran the Family and Children's Services Division representing child abuse and neglect cases. Renne endorsed Harris during her D.A. campaign.[50] sony SVS131A12M battery sony SVS131B11M battery sony VGP-BPS38 battery

In 2002, Harris prepared to run for District Attorney of San Francisco against Hallinan (the incumbent) and Bill Fazio.[51] Harris was the least-known of the three candidates[52] but persuaded the Central Committee to withhold its endorsement from Hallinan.[50] Harris and Hallinan advanced to the general election runoff with 33 and 37 percent of the vote, respectively.[53] sony SVS131C1EM battery sony SVS131C24M battery sony SVS151A12M battery sony SVP132A16M battery

In the runoff, Harris pledged never to seek the death penalty and to prosecute three-strike offenders only in cases of violent felonies.[54] Harris ran a "forceful" campaign, assisted by former mayor Willie Brown, Senator Dianne Feinstein, writer and cartoonist Aaron McGruder, and comedians Eddie Griffin and Chris Rock.[55][5sony SVS131E1EM battery sony SVS131E1DM battery sony SVF13NA1UM battery6] Harris differentiated herself from Hallinan by attacking his performance.[57] She argued that she left his office because it was technologically inept, emphasizing his 52 percent conviction rate for serious crimes despite an 83 percent average conviction rate statewide.[5sony SVS131C1DM battery sony SVF14NA1EM battery8] Harris charged that his office was not doing enough to stem the city's gun violence, particularly in poor neighborhoods like Bayview and the Tenderloin, and attacked his willingness to accept plea bargains in cases of domestic violence.[59][60] Harris won with 56 percent of the vote, becoming the first person of color elected as district attorney of San Francisco.[61] sony SVF15NA1YM battery sony SVF14NA1UM battery

Harris ran unopposed for a second term in 2007.[62]

Public safety

Non-violent crimes

Harris as San Francisco district attorney

In the summer of 2005, Harris created an environmental crimes unit.[63]

In 2007, Harris and city attorney Dennis Herrera investigated San Francisco supervisor Ed Jew for violating residency requirements necessary to hold his supervisor position;[64] Harris charged Jew with nine felonies, alleging that he had lied under oath and falsified documents to make it appear he resided in a Sunset District home, necessary so he could run for supervisor in the 4th district.[6sony SVF15NB1GM battery sony SVF15NB1YM battery sony SVF15NA1GM battery5] Jew pleaded guilty in October 2008 to unrelated federal corruption charges (mail fraud, soliciting a bribe, and extortion)[6Dell Inspiron 14-5455 battery

Dell GK5KY battery5] and pleaded guilty the following month in state court to a charge of perjury for lying about his address on nomination forms, as part of a plea agreement in which the other state charges were dropped and Jew agreed to never again hold elected office in California.[66] Dell Inspiron 14-5459 battery

Dell Inspiron 5-3558 battery Harris described the case as "about protecting the integrity of our political process, which is part of the core of our democracy".[66] For his federal offenses, Jew was sentenced to 64 months in federal prison and a $10,000 fine;[67] for the state perjury conviction, Jew was sentenced to one year in county jail, three years' probation, and about $2,000 in fines.[68] Dell Inspiron 14-5547 battery

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Under Harris, the D.A.'s office obtained more than 1,900 convictions for marijuana offenses, including persons simultaneously convicted of marijuana offenses and more serious crimes.[69] The rate at which Harris's office prosecuted marijuana crimes was higher than the rate under Hallinan, Dell Inspiron 14-5557 battery

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Dell Inspiron 15-3543 battery but the number of defendants sentenced to state prison for such offenses was substantially lower.[69] Prosecutions for low-level marijuana offenses were rare under Harris, and her office had a policy of not pursuing jail time for marijuana possession offenses.[69] Harris's successor as D.A., George Gascón, expunged all San Francisco marijuana offenses going back to 1975.[69] Dell F7HVR battery

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Violent crimes

In the early 2000s, the San Francisco murder rate per capita outpaced the national average. Within the first six months of taking office, Harris cleared 27 of 74 backlogged homicide cases by settling 14 by plea bargain and taking 11 to trial; of those trials, nine ended with convictions and two with hung juries. Dell T2T3J battery

Dell Inspiron 15-3531 batteryShe took 49 violent crime cases to trial and secured 36 convictions.[70] From 2004 to 2006, Harris achieved an 87 percent conviction rate for homicides and a 90 percent conviction rate for all felony gun violations.[71] Dell Inspiron 14-7447 battery

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Harris also pushed for higher bail for criminal defendants involved in gun-related crimes, arguing that historically low bail encouraged outsiders to commit crimes in San Francisco. SFPD officers credited Harris with tightening the loopholes defendants had used in the past.[72] In addition to creating a gun crime unitDell M5Y1K battery

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Dell Inspiron 15-3520 battery, Harris opposed releasing defendants on their own recognizance if they were arrested on gun crimes, sought minimum 90-day sentences for possession of concealed or loaded weapons, and charged all assault weapons possession cases as felonies, adding that she would seek prison terms for criminals who possessed or used assault weapons and would seek maximum penalties on gun-related crimes.[7Dell 33YDH battery

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Harris created a Hate Crimes Unit, focusing on hate crimes against LGBT children and teens in schools.[74] In early 2006, Gwen Araujo, a 17-year-old American Latina transgender teenager, was murdered by two men who later used the "gay panic defense" before being convicted of second-degree murder. Harris, alongside Araujo's mother Sylvia Guerrero, Dell Inspiron 13-7357 battery

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Dell Inspiron 15-7548 batteryconvened a two-day conference of at least 200 prosecutors and law enforcement officials nationwide to discuss strategies to counter such legal defenses.[75] Harris subsequently supported A.B. 1160, the Gwen Araujo Justice for Victims Act, advocating that California's penal code include jury instructions to ignore bias, sympathy, prejudice, or public opinion in making their decision, Dell Inspiron 14-3421 battery

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Dell 357F9 battery also making mandatory for district attorney's offices in California to educate prosecutors about panic strategies and how to prevent bias from affecting trial outcomes.[76] In September 2006, California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger signed A.B. 1160 into law; the law put California on record as declaring it contrary to public policy for defendants to be acquitted or convicted of a lesser included offense on the basis of appeals to "societal bias".[76][ Dell Inspiron 14-3442 battery

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In August 2007, state assemblyman Mark Leno introduced legislation to ban gun shows at the Cow Palace, joined by Harris, police chief Heather Fong, and mayor Gavin Newsom. City leaders contended the shows were directly contributing to the proliferation of illegal guns and spiking homicide rates in San Francisco. Dell Inspiron 14-3452 battery

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Dell Inspiron 15-7437 battery (Earlier that month Newsom had signed into law local legislation banning gun shows on city and county property.) Leno alleged that merchants drove through the public housing developments nearby and illegally sold weapons to residents.[78] While the bill would stall, local opposition to the shows continued until the Cow Palace Board of Directors in 2019 voted to approve a statement banning all future gun shows.[7Dell Inspiron 14-3452 battery

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Reform efforts

Death penalty

Harris has said life imprisonment without parole is a better and more cost-effective punishment than the death penalty,[80] and has estimated that the resultant cost savings could pay for a thousand additional police officers in San Francisco alone.[80] Dell Inspiron 14-5447 battery

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During her campaign, Harris pledged never to seek the death penalty.[54] After a San Francisco Police Department officer, Isaac Espinoza, was shot and killed in 2004, U.S. senator (and former San Francisco mayor) Dianne Feinstein,[8Dell 1608T,C4MF8,5KG27 battery

Dell Inspiron 15-5555 battery1] U.S. senator Barbara Boxer, Oakland mayor Jerry Brown, and the San Francisco Police Officers Association pressured Harris to reverse that position, but she did not.[82] (Polls found that seventy percent of voters supported Harris's decision.)[83] When Edwin Ramos, an illegal immigrant and alleged MS-13 gang member, Dell M5Y1K battery

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Dell Inspiron 15-5552 batterywas accused of murdering a man and his two sons in 2009,[84] Harris sought a sentence of life in prison without parole, a decision Mayor Gavin Newsom backed.[85] Dell Inspiron 15-3567 battery

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Recidivism and re-entry initiative

In 2004, Harris recruited civil rights activist Lateefah Simon to create the San Francisco Reentry Division.[86] The flagship program was the Back on Track initiative, a first-of-its-kind reentry program for first-time nonviolent offenders aged 18–30.[8Dell T54FJ battery

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7] Initiative participants whose crimes were not weapon- or gang-related would plead guilty in exchange for a deferral of sentencing and regular appearances before a judge over a twelve- to eighteen-month period. The program maintained rigorous graduation requirements, mandating completion of up to 220 hours of community service,

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obtaining a high-school-equivalency diploma, maintaining steady employment, taking parenting classes, and passing drug tests. At graduation, the court would dismiss the case and expunge the graduate's record.[8Dell Inspiron 17-5749 battery

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8] Over six years, the 200 people graduated from the program had a recidivism rate of less than ten percent, compared to the 53 percent of California's drug offenders who returned to prison within two years of release. Back on Track earned recognition from the U.S. Department of Justice as a model for reentry programs. Dell Latitude 3150 battery

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The DOJ found that the cost to the taxpayers per participant was markedly lower ($5,000) than the cost of adjudicating a case ($10,000) and housing a low-level offender ($50,000).[89] In 2009, a state law (the Back on Track Reentry Act, A.B. 750) was enacted, encouraging other California counties to start similar programs.[90Dell Latitude 3160 battery

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][91] Adopted by the National District Attorneys Association as a model, prosecutor offices in Baltimore, Philadelphia, and Atlanta have used Back on Track as a template for their own programs.[92][93][94] Dell RYXXH battery

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Truancy initiative

In 2006, as part of an initiative to reduce the city's skyrocketing homicide rate, Harris led a city-wide effort to combat truancy for at-risk elementary school youth in San Francisco.[95] Declaring chronic truancy a matter of public safety and pointing out that the majority of prison inmates and homicide victims are dropouts or habitual truants, Dell Latitude 5280 battery

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Dell WD52H,KWFFN,5K1GW,909H5,G0G2M battery Harris's office met with thousands of parents at high-risk schools and sent out letters warning all families of the legal consequences of truancy at the beginning of the fall semester, adding she would prosecute the parents of chronically truant elementary students; penalties included a $2,500 fine and up to a year in jail.[96] The program was controversial when introduced. Dell GJKNX battery

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In 2008, Harris issued citations against six parents whose children missed at least fifty days of school, the first time San Francisco prosecuted adults for student truancy. San Francisco's school chief, Carlos Garcia, Dell P63NY,N3KPR battery

Dell Latitude E5550 batterysaid the path from truancy to prosecution was lengthy, and that the school district usually spends months encouraging parents through phone calls, reminder letters, private meetings, hearings before the School Attendance Review Board, and offers of help from city agencies and social services; two of the six parents entered no plea but said they would work with the D.A.'Dell Latitude E5250 battery

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Dell G5M10,8V5GX,6MT4T batterys office and social service agencies to create "parental responsibility plans" to help them start sending their children to school regularly.[97] By April 2009, 1,330 elementary school students were habitual or chronic truants, down 23 percent from 1,730 in 2008, and down from 2,517 in 2007 and from 2,856 in 2006.[9Dell 33YDH battery

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Dell Inspiron 17R-5737 battery8] Harris's office prosecuted seven parents in three years, with none jailed.[98]

Attorney General of California (2011–2017)

Elections

See also: Electoral history of Kamala Harris

2010

Main article: 2010 California Attorney General election

Nearly two years before the 2010 election, Harris announced she planned to run.[99] She also stated she would only run if then-Attorney General Jerry Brown did not seek re-election for that position.[100] Brown instead chose to run for governor and Harris consolidated support from prominent California Democrats.[1Dell MFKVP battery

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01] Both of California's senators, Dianne Feinstein and Barbara Boxer, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, United Farm Workers cofounder Dolores Huerta, and mayor of Los Angeles Antonio Villaraigosa all endorsed her during the Democratic primary.[101] In the June 8, 2010 primary, she was nominated with 33.6 percent of the vote, defeating Alberto Torrico and Chris Kelly.[102]

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In the general election, she faced Republican Los Angeles County district attorney Steve Cooley, who led most of the race.[103][104] Cooley ran as a nonpartisan, distancing himself from Republican gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman's campaign.[citation needed] The election was held November 2 but after a protracted period of counting mail-in and provisional ballots, Cooley conceded on November 25.[10Dell Precision 3510 battery

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Dell XPS 14Z-L412Z battery5] Harris was sworn in on January 3, 2011; she is the first woman, the first African American, and the first South Asian American to hold the office of Attorney General in the state's history.[106]

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2014

Main article: 2014 California Attorney General election

Harris announced her intention to run for re-election in February 2014 and filed paperwork to run on February 12.[107] The Sacramento Bee,[108] Los Angeles Daily News,[109] and Los Angeles Times endorsed her for re-election.[110] Dell Latitude 5480 battery

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On November 4, 2014, Harris was re-elected against Republican Ronald Gold, winning 57.5 percent of the vote to 42.5 percent.[111] Dell Latitude E5470 battery

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Consumer protection

Fraud, waste, and abuse

Harris meets foreclosure victims in 2011.

In 2011, Harris announced the creation of the Mortgage Fraud Strike Force in the wake of the 2010 United States foreclosure crisis.[112] That same year, Harris obtained two of the largest recoveries in the history of California's False Claims Act – $241 million from Quest Diagnostics and then $323 million from the SCAN healthcare network – over excess state Medi-Cal and federal Medicare payments.[113][114] Dell Y9N00 battery

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In 2012, Harris leveraged California's economic clout to obtain better terms in the National Mortgage Settlement against the nation's five largest mortgage servicers – JPMorgan Chase, Bank of America, Wells Fargo, Citigroup and Ally Bank.[ Dell 489XN battery

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Dell XPS 13-L322X battery115] The mortgage firms were accused of illegally foreclosing on homeowners. After dismissing an initial offer of $2–4 billion in relief for Californians, Harris withdrew from negotiations. The offer eventually was increased to $18.4 billion in debt relief and $2 billion in other financial assistance for California homeowners.[116][11Dell ALIENWARE M18X 2F8K3 battery

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Harris worked with Assembly speaker John Pérez and Senate president pro tem Darrell Steinberg in 2013 to introduce the Homeowner Bill of Rights, considered one of the strongest protections nationwide against aggressive foreclosure tactics.[118] The Homeowner Bill of Rights banned the practices of "dual-tracking" Dell C4K9V battery

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Dell T19VW battery (processing a modification and foreclosure at the same time) and robo-signing and provided homeowners with a single point of contact at their lending institution.[119] Harris achieved multiple nine-figure settlements for California homeowners under the bill mostly for robo-signing and dual-track abuses, Dell T0TRM battery

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Dell G0G2M batteryas well as prosecuting instances in which loan processors failed to promptly credit mortgage payments, miscalculated interest rates, and charged borrowers improper fees. Harris secured hundreds of millions in relief, including $268 million from Ocwen Financial Corporation, $470 million from HSBC, and $550 million from SunTrust Banks.[120Dell 90V7W,JD25G battery

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From 2013 to 2015, Harris pursued financial recoveries for California's public employee and teacher's pensions, CalPERS and CalSTRS against various financial giants for misrepresentation in the sale of mortgage-backed securities. She secured multiple nine-figure recoveries for the state pensions, recovering about $193 million from Citigroup, $210 million from S&PDell HW905 battery

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Dell NCVF0 battery, $300 million from JP Morgan Chase, and over half a billion from Bank of America.[123][124][125][126]

In 2013, Harris declined to authorize a civil complaint drafted by state investigators who accused OneWest Bank, owned by an investment group headed by future U.S. treasury secretary Steven Mnuchin (then a private citizen), Dell RM672 battery

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Dell GVD76 batteryof "widespread violation" of California foreclosure laws.[127] During the 2016 elections, Harris was the only Democratic Senate candidate to receive a donation from Mnuchin. Harris was criticized for accepting the donation because Mnuchin purportedly profited from the subprime mortgage crisis through OneWest Bank;[1Dell CWVXW battery

Dell F3G33 battery28] she later voted against his confirmation as treasury secretary in February 2017. In 2019, Harris's campaign stated that the decision not to pursue prosecution hinged on the state's inability to subpoena OneWest. Her spokesman said, "There was no question OneWest conducted predatory lending, Dell DHT0W battery

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Dell W0X4F0 batteryand Senator Harris believes they should be punished. Unfortunately, the law was squarely on their side and they were shielded from state subpoenas because they're a federal bank."[129] Dell M9H56 battery

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In 2014, Harris settled charges she had brought against rent-to-own retailer Aaron's, Inc. on allegations of incorrect late charges, overcharging customers who paid off their contracts before the due date, and privacy violations. In the settlement, the retailer refunded $28.4 million to California customers and paid $3.4 million in civil penalties.[1Dell 9TJ2J battery

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In 2015, Harris obtained a $1.2 billion judgment against for-profit post-secondary education company Corinthian Colleges for false advertising and deceptive marketing targeting vulnerable, low-income students and misrepresenting job placement rates to students, investors, and accreditation agencies.[131] Dell 970V9 battery

Dell YRX4W battery The Court ordered Corinthian to pay $820 million in restitution and another $350 million in civil penalties.[ Dell MPK22 battery

Dell TPHRG battery132] That same year, Harris also secured a $60 million settlement with JP Morgan Chase to resolve allegations of illegal debt collection with respect to credit card customers, with the bank also agreeing to change practices that violated California consumer protection laws by collecting incorrect amounts, HP PX03XL Battery

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In 2015, Harris opened an investigation of the Office of Ratepayer Advocates, San Diego Gas and Electric, and Southern California Edison regarding the closure of San Onofre Nuclear Generating Station. California state investigators searched the home of California utility regulator Michael Peevey and found handwritten notes that allegedly showed he had met with an Edison HP BP02XL Battery

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Privacy rights

In February 2012, Harris announced an agreement with Apple, Amazon, Google, Hewlett-Packard, Microsoft, and Research in Motion to mandate that apps sold in their stores display prominent privacy policies informing users of what private information they were sharing, and with whom.[136] HP NP03XL Battery

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41]

Criminal justice reform

Launch of Division of Recidivism Reduction and Re-Entry

In November 2013, Harris launched the California Department of Justice's Division of Recidivism Reduction and Re-Entry in partnership with district attorney offices in San Diego, Los Angeles, and Alameda County.[142] In March 2015, Sony SVE15AA11V keyboard Sony SVE151G13L keyboard Harris announced the creation of a pilot program in coordination with the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department called "Back on Track LA". Like Back on Track, first time, non-violent, non-sexual, offenders aged between 18 and 30[failed verification] Sony SVE151J13M keyboard Sony SVE151G12W keyboard- 90 men participated in the pilot program for 24–30 months. Assigned a case manager, participants received education through a partnership with the Los Angeles Community College District and job training services.[143] Sony SVE151L11W keyboard Sony SVE171A11M keyboard Sony SVE171A11V keyboard

Sentencing and prison inmate retention

After the 2011 United States Supreme Court in Brown v. Plata declared California's prisons so overcrowded they inflicted cruel and unusual punishment, Harris fought federal court supervision, explaining "I have a client, and I don't get to choose my client."[144Sony SVE171B11W keyboard Sony SVE151G11V keyboard] Harris's record on wrongful conviction cases as attorney general has engendered some criticism from academics and activists. Law professor Lara Bazelon contends Harris "weaponized technicalities to keep wrongfully convicted people behind bars rather than allow them new trials".[14Sony SVE171B11V keyboard Sony SVE171C11L keyboard Sony SVE171C11V keyboard 5] Harris declined to take any position on criminal sentencing-reform initiatives Prop 36 (2012) and Prop 47 (2014), arguing it would be improper because her office prepares the ballot booklets. John Van de Kamp, a predecessor as attorney general, publicly disagreed with the rationale.[144] Sony SVE171E11L keyboard Sony SVE151G11M keyboard

In September 2014, attorneys for Harris argued unsuccessfully in a court filing against the early release of prisoners, citing the need for inmate firefighting labor. When the memo provoked headlines, Harris spoke out against the memo. Sony SVE171E11M keyboard Sony SVE171E12L keyboard Sony SVE151G11L keyboardShe said she was unaware of it, and the attorneys had produced the memo without her knowledge.[146] Since the 1940s, qualified California inmates have the option of volunteering to receive comprehensive training from the California Department of Sony SVE171G11M keyboardForestry and Fire Protection in exchange for sentence reductions and more comfortable prison accommodations; prison firefighters receive about $2 a day, and another $1 when battling fires.[147] Sony SVE171E13M keyboard Sony SVE171G11L keyboard

LGBT rights

Opposing Prop 8

Main article: Hollingsworth v. Perry

In 2008, California voters passed Prop 8, a state constitutional amendment providing that only marriages "between a man and a woman" are valid. Legal challenges were made by opponents soon after its approval, and a pair of same-sex couples filed a lawsuit against the initiative in federal court in the case of Perry v. Schwarzenegger (later Hollingsworth v. Perry).

Sony SVT131A11M keyboard In their 2010 campaigns, California attorney general Jerry Brown and Harris both pledged to not defend Prop 8.[148]

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whereareroo · 4 years

Text

SAINTLY CONSIDERATIONS

WF THOUGHTS (10/31/20).

For reasons that I will explain below, today is a big deal. I'm not talking about Halloween, although my topic is coincidentally related to Halloween.

My topic today is sainthood. Do you understand sainthood? Do you want to be a saint? Can you be a saint? Let's dive in!

I'll be reviewing sainthood from a Catholic perspective. Other Christian religions hold similar views.

What does it mean to be a saint? That's a good place to start. The answer is simple. A saint, and here the lower case "s" is very important, is anyone who is in heaven. Yes, everyone who makes it to heaven is a saint.

Do you see the immediate problem? We don't know who is in heaven. Experts say that more than 100 billion people have lived over the course of human history. That means that there are billions and billions of saints. There is no list for us to look at. We each may have our own beliefs about deceased relatives or friends, but there is no way to prove or confirm their sainthood.

For good reason, centuries ago, the leaders of The Church decided that it would be good to officially designate certain deceased holy people as "Saints." Note the upper case "S." Saints with an upper case "S" have been officially designated as Saints by The Church. In essence, The Church is declaring that these people are certainly in heaven. Thus, the list of Saints is a partial list of the population of heaven. Are you with me so far?

The Church is two thousand years old. Over that long history, the accepted methods for declaring a Saint have varied. Over significant portions of that long history, record keeping was poor or nonexistent. Thus, we don't know how many Saints there are. I've seen estimates as low as 2,500 and as high as 10,000. If you'd like to undertake a big research project, feel free to compile a comprehensive list of the Saints.

We're fairly certain about the identity of Saints declared after the year 1170. Up until 1170, Saints could be declared by Bishops. That created chaos. In 1170, the Pope (Alexander III) decreed that only a Pope can designate a Saint. That stopped the chaos and streamlined the record keeping.

How do Popes decide who to designate as a Saint? That's easy. This is The Church. There are rules. Strict rules. Although they have been tweaked a few times, the rules have generally remained unchanged since the year 1200. The latest "tweaking" occurred in 1983.

So what are the rules? How does the process work? Think about the verification process for the Guinness Book of World Records, and add massive amounts of steroids. Let me give you the basics.

You don't become a Saint quickly. The process can take decades or centuries. There are several steps. Along the way, different honorary titles are bestowed upon the candidate. The best way to understand the process is to focus on the titles.

The entire process is called "canonization." Successful candidates for Sainthood are added to the official "canon," or list, of Saints.

Canonization starts when a local Bishop decides that a deceased holy person from his jurisdiction might be eligible for Sainthood. That Bishop, assisted by a committee appointed by that Bishop, launches an exhaustive investigation into the candidate. It's very rare for a candidate to survive the investigation. Sainthood is reserved for extraordinary people who have a verifiable track record. If the local Bishop decides that he has found an extraordinary person with a verifiable track record, he closes the investigation and bestows the title "Servant of God" upon the candidate. That's the first title bestowed in the canonization process. The investigation materials on the "Servant of God" are sent to Rome.

In Rome, at The Vatican, there is an investigative body called the "Congregation for the Causes of the Saints." Its job is to start from scratch and do a ruthless investigation into the candidacy of the Servant of God. A team is appointed to argue in favor of the candidacy. A team is appointed to argue against the candidacy. It is very difficult to survive the investigation. If the Servant of God survives the scrutiny, they receive the new title of "Venerable." That means that the person has been found to be a holy person worthy of great respect and reverence within The Church. Becoming "Venerable" does not mean that the candidate will become a Saint. It simply means that the candidate has survived another step in the process. It's a big deal for a candidate to be declared Venerable. Word spreads throughout The Church. In prayer, people begin to ask the Venerable (sort of a semi-Saint) to intercede on their behalf with God.

The next step is normally very, very slow. The Church sits and waits for a sign from God. What kind of sign? A miracle! If a miracle attributable to the Venerable can be verified, The Church assumes that God wants the candidate to continue towards Sainthood. Most of these miracles involve a total cure of a terminal illness after people prayed to the Venerable for the cure. There is a team at The Vatican that rigorously investigates possible miracles, and that team includes dozens of the top doctors in the world. Miracles are rarely verified. The rules are very strict for a miracle to be verified as part of the canonization process. There must be verification that the patient had a condition with no known cure. There must be proof that prayers were directed to the Venerable. There must be a rapid and complete cure that lasts a number of years. A team of doctors must affirm that there was no natural explanation for the cure. The standards are very, very rigorous. If the candidate is one of the very few who survives these rigors, he or she is entitled to "Beatification." Beatification is an official statement from The Church that it is "worthy of belief" that the candidate is in heaven. The "proof" is the miracle, which is assumed to be a sign that the person is with God in heaven. Of course, Beatification comes with a new title. The potential Saint is now referred to as "Blessed," as in Blessed Antonio or Blessed Alexandra. Are you still with me? The person isn't a Saint yet.

This brings us to the final step. It's another difficult step.There must be proof of another miracle after the candidate becomes "Blessed." The same rigorous standards apply. The verification might take several decades or more. Sometimes, there is no second miracle. If a second miracle is verified, the Blessed is "canonized" and is given the precious title of "Saint." The granting of that title is the official announcement that the person is definitely in heaven with God. The ordeal is over. The new Saint is assigned a Feast Day that, every year, is celebrated on The Church calendar.

Let's do a quick review, in order, of the relevant titles on the path to Sainthood: Servant of God; Venerable; Blessed; Saint. Got it?

What does any of this have to do with October 31, 2020? I'll tell you. It's an interesting story.

In 1852, in a humble Connecticut town called Waterbury, the first child was born to Irish immigrant parents. His name was Michael Joseph McGivney. His parents would have 12 more children.

When he was 16, McGivney entered the seminary and began studies to become a priest. When he was 20, his father died and he had to leave the seminary to help raise his siblings. Without the wages of his father, his family was destitute. He ultimately returned to the seminary and became a priest, in 1877, when he was 25.

The young Father McGivney was assigned to St. Mary's parish in New Haven, Connecticut. From his own life experience, McGivney understood the suffering caused by the death of father in a large family. Determined to address that problem, at his church he formed a Catholic men's organization and named it the Knights of Columbus. The small group of men began meeting in 1882. With a portion of the dues paid by members, McGivney bought life insurance to protect the wives and children of the members. The $1,000 death benefit was a hugh boost to unfortunate families. The Knights also did charitable work in their community, particularly in the area of providing services to widows and children.

On an individual basis, in addition to his work with the Knights of Columbus, Father McGivney made extraordinary efforts to provide for the spiritual, emotional, and financial needs of folks in his community. He was a local hero.

Before long, the Knights of Columbus spread all over the world. Hundreds of churches started chapters, which are called "Councils." The growing size and wealth of the organization, which is still headquartered in New Haven, allowed for enhanced life insurance programs and wide reaching charitable work. Men were proud to be a member of the Knights of Columbus. My father was a Knight. At least three of my uncles were Knights. Babe Ruth was a Knight. Other Knights included: JFK and his brother Ted; Florida Governor and presidential candidate Jeb Bush; Supreme Court Justice Sam Alito; Speaker of the House John Boehner; and football coach Vince Lombardi.

The Knights of Columbus grew into a massive organization. Today, all over the world, there are 2 million members. It is the biggest Catholic organization in the world. It runs it's own life insurance company, and that company is one of the largest in the world. It supports Catholic causes all over the world, including assistance to poor families and immigrants, refugee support, school support, programs for the mentally and physically disabled, emergency relief at disaster locations, employment services, blood drives, and numerous other efforts. When The Church wants something done, she calls on the Knights of Columbus.

In addition to starting the Knights of Columbus, Father McGivney became a role model for other priests and for Catholic men. His priesthood was not contained by the walls of a church building. In his view, being a good Catholic meant working in the community. In his view, a good Catholic was required to attend to the needs of the less fortunate. He was an inspiration to many Catholics. Sadly, he died in 1890 at the age of 38. He was killed by the Russian flu, which was a form of Coronavirus that swept through Connecticut.

Father McGivney was not forgotten. He became a legend. In 1982, as the Knights of Columbus was celebrating its 100th anniversary, the Bishop in Connecticut started the long process towards Sainthood for Father McGiveny. Do you see where I'm going here?

Here's how the process has unfolded thus far for Father McGivney:

▪In 1997, after 15 years of work, the Bishop in Connecticut completed his investigation and declared McGivney a "Servant of God." The case then moved to Rome for further investigation and study.

▪In 2008, The Church bestowed the title of "Venerable" upon McGivney. As you remember, that means that he was deemed a holy person worthy of special respect and reverence. His quest towards Sainthood was allowed to continue to the next step.

▪Today is October 31, 2020. It's a huge day. A few months ago, after reviewing the investigative materials from the rigorous examiners, the Pope confirmed a miracle attributable to McGivney. Today, at the Cathedral in Connecticut, McGivney was Beatified. He is now know as Blessed Michael J. McGivney. He's one step away from Sainthood. Wow!

Sainthood for McGivney would be a really, really big deal. He wasn't a Cardinal. He wasn't a Bishop. He was a lowly parish priest. He is the first American parish priest to get this close to Sainthood. I hope he is the first American parish priest to become a Saint. Wouldn't that be wonderful?

I know that you're all asking: "What was the miracle?" I'll tell you in a minute. A quick diversion is necessary.

After McGivney was declared "Venerable" in 2008, The Church investigated two potential miracles that may have been attributable to him. The Church rejected both claims. The standards are very, very tough.

The third try was the charm. In 2014, a Tennessee couple became pregnant with their 13th child. Early tests revealed that the baby had Down Syndrome. A few weeks after that diagnosis, the couple was told that the baby also had an extremely severe case of a condition known as fetal hydrops. They were told that there was no chance that the baby would survive through the fourth month of the pregnancy.

The husband was a Knight, and when this terrible news arrived the couple was about to go on a tour of Shrines that was sponsored by the Knights of Columbus. They decided to go on the tour to ask Father McGivney to facilitate a miracle. Other Knights on the trip, and their families, also prayed to McGivney for a miracle. Word spread, and Knights all over America were praying to Father McGivney.

When the couple returned from their pilgrimage, they went for additional tests. The fatal condition had totally disappeared. There was no medical explanation for the cure. No doctor had ever seen such a sudden, and complete, disappearance of extremely severe fetal hydrops.

The child, named Michael in honor of McGivney, is now 5. Except for his Down Syndrome, he is totally healthy.

Despite the circumstances, the investigative tribunal had doubts about the miracle. One of their concerns was that the baby was born with Down Syndrome. Why wasn't that cured too? When asked about that issue, the parents had an amazing answer. They said that they never prayed for a resolution of the Down Syndrome condition, and that they asked others to ignore that issue too. They focused exclusively on the fatal condition. If God wanted them to have a child with Down Syndrome, they were ready to accept that. They just wanted their baby to live! Ultimately, the tribunal verified the miracle and the Pope agreed.

Do you need further proof? Michael was born on May 15th, the same day that the first Knights of Columbus council was chartered in New Haven. The name of Michael's mother is Michelle, and she has the same birthday as Father McGivney. Michael has 12 siblings, and Father McGivney had 12 siblings. All coincidences, or Devine Intercession? You decide.

As of today, Blessed Father Michael J. McGivney is one miracle away from becoming a Saint. If you need a miracle, or are aware of anybody who needs a miracle, it couldn't hurt to send a few prayers his way. He's a proud Irishman. I'm sure he'd get a big kick out of making it to the big list.

Here's another interesting, and final, tidbit. On the calendar of The Church, tomorrow (November 1st.) is All Saints Day. In the old days, it was called All Hallows' Day. It is the Feast Day to honor officially recognized Saints as well as the billions of unknown saints. Halloween is related to All Saints Day. In the old days, Halloween was known as "All Hallows' Eve" or "All Saints Eve." Isn't it strange that Father Mcgivney's Beatification is taking place on Halloween?

Tonight, during trick-or-treating, be smart if you are visited by a person wearing a Knight costume. Be generous. It could be Father McGivney. If you can, give him a Tootsie Roll. The Knights of Columbus love Tootsie Rolls. (Every year they distribute Tootsie Rolls outside churches as part of their fundraiser to support mentally disabled children.) Happy Halloween.

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ericfruits · 7 years

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Nancy Pelosi and the Dreamers

WITHOUT pausing once to sit down or use the bathroom Nancy Pelosi spoke for more than eight hours on February 7th to protest Congress’s failure to protect young immigrants threatened with deportation. Between 10am and 6.10pm, the 77-year-old Democratic leader in the House of Representatives stood in 4-inch heels, reading heart-wrenching letters from high-achieving young immigrants and quoting from the Bible and Pope Francis. When she finally stopped, she turned around to high-five her cheering colleagues before sitting down. Although she claimed during her address that it was not her intention to break any record, this may have been the longest speech ever made on the House floor.

The ostensible reason for Mrs Pelosi’s protest was to demand that Paul Ryan, the House Speaker, allow a vote on a legislative fix for DACA (the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals programme). Introduced by Barack Obama it shielded from deportation about 800,000 undocumented immigrants brought to America as children and was cancelled by President Donald Trump last September. In January, Democrats agreed a measure to fund the federal government only after extracting a promise from Mitch McConnell, the Senate majority leader, that he would introduce a vote on legislation to protect DACA recipients known as “Dreamers”.

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As Mrs Pelosi hogged the floor, the clock was ticking on a short-term bill to keep the government open; it expires at midnight on February 8th. Mrs Pelosi said her support for a new bill—a $300bn spending deal cut by Democrats and Republicans in the Senate—was dependent upon Mr Ryan promising a vote to save the Dreamers.

Mrs Pelosi’s speech was not technically a filibuster, because those were banned in the House in the 19th century. It was instead an unusual use of her prerogative, as a leader, to speak for longer than most members are allowed. In 1909 James Beauchamp “Champ” Clark of Missouri, House Speaker, held the floor for five hours and 15 minutes to speak against a tariff overhaul. In 2009 John Boehner, then Republican leader, caused a stir when his “fila-Boehner” against a climate change bill lasted for more than an hour. That bill, to reduce greenhouse gas emissions, passed in the House but failed in the Senate.

What will Mrs Pelosi’s record-breaking effort achieve? Mr Ryan has indicated that he is not open to a House debate on immigration and that he will only push a bill that Mr Trump supports. Many Democrats say that extracting a promise on this is of little use anyway; Mr McConnell has still not held the vote he promised.

But Mrs Pelosi had another objective, to show progressive Democrats that she is with them. Having originally refused to agree to any spending deal until there was a legislative fix for DACA, Mrs Pelosi and Chuck Schumer, the Democratic leader in the Senate, enraged the Democrats’ progressive caucuses when they abandoned that strategy in January. The new bipartisan spending bill will further divide Democrats: though it makes no mention of immigration it would mean billions of dollars more in domestic spending on programmes loved by Democrats.

So does Mrs Pelosi want the bill to pass? On February 8th, as the House prepared to vote on the bill, she said she would not push Democrats to vote against it. That is not surprising. If she did, and a shutdown ensued, her party might be blamed. But it does make it more likely that Democrats will vote for the bill and it will pass. It suggests too that Mrs Pelosi’s eyes are fixed more tightly on mid-terms in November than on immigration.

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goldeagleprice · 5 years

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John Boehner, 53rd Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, Agrees to Exclusive NGC Signature Label Deal

by Numismatic Guaranty Corporation

The Honorable John Boehner, who represented Ohio in the US House of Representatives from 1991 to 2015 and served as Speaker of the House from 2011 to 2015, has agreed to individually hand sign certification labels exclusively for Numismatic Guaranty Corporation® (NGC®).

In January 2011, the House of Representatives elected Boehner as Speaker, making him third in line to the United States presidency. Before becoming Speaker, Boehner had served as minority leader since 2007 and was elected his party’s majority leader in 2006.

During his first year as Speaker, Boehner helped negotiate a bipartisan federal budget agreement while working to curb wasteful spending. He also earned a reputation as a crusader against congressional corruption.

Boehner began his political career in 1982 as a township trustee in Union Township, Ohio (now West Chester Township, Ohio). In 1984, he was elected to the Ohio House of Representatives, where he served until 1990 when he was elected to the US House of Representatives.

Before Boehner stepped down as Speaker at the end of 2015, Pope Francis spoke to a joint meeting of Congress after accepting a formal invitation from Boehner—an event Boehner considered to be the highest point of his congressional career.

“I hold the values of economic freedom, individual liberty and personal responsibility very dear. In many ways, American currency represents all of these values,” said Boehner. “For this reason, I’m very proud to collaborate with NGC to champion the American dream as it is reflected in our nation’s coins.”

“NGC is proud to partner with such a well-known name in US political history,” said NGC Chairman and Grading Finalizer Mark Salzberg. “An NGC Authentic Hand-Signed Label featuring John Boehner’s signature adds a personal connection to a prominent figure in American politics.”

NGC Authentic Hand-Signed Labels pair an influential person’s autograph with a coin to create a one-of-a-kind collectible. Boehner joins a diverse roster of NGC Signature Label signers, including Edmund C. Moy, 38th US Mint Director; Charlie Duke, Apollo 16 Astronaut; and Gov. Hon. Mike Castle, who also served as a member of the US House of Representatives.

NGC Hon. John Boehner Authentic Hand-Signed Labels will be available soon from select retailers.

To learn more about NGC Authentic Hand-Signed Labels, visit NGCcoin.com/SignatureLabels.

The post John Boehner, 53rd Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, Agrees to Exclusive NGC Signature Label Deal appeared first on Numismatic News.

#Precious Metals

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scripture-pictures · 5 years

Text

#nightly bread #daily bread #the pope #joe biden #john boehner

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d-d-didnt-i · 6 years

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John Boehner tearfully leaves Congress: His top 5 weepy moments

Former Speaker of the House John Boehner bid adieu to Congress on Thursday as Wisconsin Republican Paul Ryan took over as his successor.

Ahead of Ryan's swearing in, the ever sensitive Boehner addressed the House -- tissue box in hand -- in his last speech as the 61st speaker of the United States House of Representatives.

"The hill had twists. The hill had turns," he said. "And even a few tears. Nothing wrong with that. But let me tell you, it was all just perfect."

The 65-year-old Republican from Ohio will step down from his post Friday. In honor of his last snivel as speaker, here are five of Boehner's weepy Washington moments.

5. The time Kelly Clarkson sang at President Barack Obama's second inauguration.

4. The time he watched the 2010 election results with the Republican National Committee.

3. When he joined Pope Francis at the Speaker's Balcony.

2. When he was sworn in as speaker of the House in 2011.

1. The time he honored Neil Armstrong with a Congressional Gold Medal.

#john boehner #politics

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madamspeaker · 3 years

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Good arguments. But still... give it some thought. I think you'd do a much better job on the political biography aspect since you actually understand what her political tactics are all about, and as for the personal parts... well, you pointed out the flaws in the other books yourself. Doesn't need more probing into what she wants to keep private, just tying up loose ends of the anecdotes she and others did share. :)

You are very kind, Anon.

I think the thing that irked me so much about Page’s book (not so much Ball’s, as to her credit she and her marketing never used the word “definitive”) is that there are plenty of more personal in nature anecdotes out there, often from Nancy herself. It strikes me that someone aiming for the “definitive” biography might spend time collating most of these stories into one place. There are things in Nancy’s life, fairly big things too, that Page just skips. That week in October 2019 when Nancy lost Elijah Cummings and her brother Tommy within days of each other doesn’t get a single mention - which is pretty remarkable when you consider what both men personally meant to her, and the madness that went down in Congress on the day of Tommy’s funeral. The book is just full of odd gaps. There’s no real talk of Nancy’s religion, which is obviously a big part of her life. No mention of the Pope’s visit, which I would assume meant a lot to her (it did to Boehner). I actually think the book might be shorter than Ball’s. I can’t be sure as I read an ebook version, and Ball’s was on iBooks and Page’s on Kindle, and the text size is different on each, but it feels like Ball covered more ground. I honestly wish the two of them had colaborated instead of producing two books. - and I would be happy to edit for them lol. I also think Nancy warrants at least two volumes when it comes to a biography.

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texasborderbusiness · 6 years

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Texas Border Business

University of Notre Dame, Indiana – It’s a bright morning in Hidalgo, Texas, a small town on the Rio Grande about 60 miles inland from the Gulf of Mexico. Like many border towns, there’s some history here. A defining feature of Hidalgo is the Old Pump House, built in 1909 right on the riverbank to bring water to thousands of acres of farmland in the Rio Grande Valley. In 1933, a massive hurricane flooded the area and caused the river to alter its course: The bank was now about a half mile away. A channel was built to fill the gap, until the facility aged out of usefulness in 1983.

Which is to say, things here have changed.

There’s another defining feature in this area: a jagged wall that separates the U.S. from Mexico. In Hidalgo, it’s about 100 yards from the pump house. It rises and falls with the topography, alternating between stretches of concrete barrier in some areas and high metal fence in others. Sister Norma Pimentel, M.J., is known to bring visitors here to pray and reflect. To her, it’s another reminder that things have changed.

“I grew up here, and we didn’t have walls,” Sister Norma remembers. “People from this side and that side, we were family. They allowed us to be in community with each other.”

Sister Norma is executive director of Catholic Charities of the Rio Grande Valley, the charitable arm of the Catholic Diocese of Brownsville. The University of Notre Dame is honoring her with the 2018 Laetare Medal. Established at Notre Dame in 1883, the Laetare Medal was conceived as an American counterpart of the Golden Rose, a papal honor that antedates the 11th century. Past Laetare recipients include President John F. Kennedy, Catholic Worker founder Dorothy Day, novelist Walker Percy, former vice president Joe Biden and former speaker of the House John Boehner. It is considered the most prestigious honor given to an American Catholic.

The “American” part of that designation Sister Norma says occurred by “chiripa — sheer chance.” Her parents came from Mexico to the U.S. in the 1950s when her father sought to become an American citizen. He filled out an application and planned to return home to Mexico to await a response, but was told he must wait in the U.S. while his application was processed. He hadn’t planned on the extended stay with young children and a pregnant wife but found work bagging groceries and an apartment for rent. During the stay, his wife gave birth to Norma. The family stayed in South Texas, but with relatives on both sides of the border Sister Norma refers to her upbringing as “entre dos fronteras, enjoying life in two countries.”

There were fewer strangers in Sister Norma’s life then. This too has changed. One of her duties is oversight of the Catholic Charities of Rio Grande Valley’s Humanitarian Respite Center in McAllen, Texas, the largest city in Hidalgo County. It is here that scores of immigrants — approximately 100 every day, Sister Norma estimates — stop after crossing the border into the U.S. They arrive after processing by U.S. Customs and Border Protection with little more than the clothes on their backs and a notice to appear in immigration court. In many cases, they’ve turned themselves in to the border patrol as an initial step in seeking asylum in the U.S.

“They come totally destroyed,” Sister Norma says.

“They’ve come through so much. They’ve come from different countries in Central America, up through Mexico, most of the time walking and hiding from people who want to hurt them.”

The journey from Central America to the U.S. is an arduous and dangerous one. Often immigrants will pay thousands of dollars to guides for assistance in traveling north. This may require selling off many of their worldly possessions, including mortgaging their homes in which family they’re leaving behind may still be living. But the money rarely pays for protection. They are vulnerable to every kind of harm on the journey, especially women, who are prey for rapists and human traffickers. Other times kidnappers will take children hostage and demand ransom money from the family.

Yet for these people, the risks of staying in their countries outweigh the risks of making the journey. The vast majority of the immigrants traveling through the respite center are fleeing war, crime or crippling economic circumstances back home. So they leave, becoming strangers in a strange land on their way to a friend or family member already here.

One such case is Jose, who arrived at the respite center late one afternoon with his son, Gabriel. He was the subject of increasing harassment and threats by gangs in his native El Salvador. Jose was in the army and later worked for a city mayor. His position gave him access to things like firearms and uniforms, which the gangs coveted so they could impersonate military personnel. As he continued to refuse their demands, the threats escalated. Amazingly, despite his background of military and government service, he didn’t have adequate protection from the gangs.

“My boss told me — my direct supervisor, the mayor — that I should quit my job,” Jose says. “He thought that quitting was the only way to keep my distance from them. They had already marked me, how I worked … they didn’t stop bothering me. When I was in the army, they bothered me for two years. I was just there to do my job, earn my daily bread.”

When the gangs began to threaten Gabriel’s life, Jose finally decided to leave. He left behind a wife and a 2-year old in El Salvador and traveled 25 days before reaching McAllen.

Jose and his son, Gabriel.

Stories like Jose’s have been a part of Sister Norma’s experience ever since she entered religious life. In the 1970s, the border patrol would routinely contact the superior at her convent seeking shelter for an asylee family. They would stay with the community until arrangements could be made for them to travel to family in the U.S. “During those first years of my religious formation, I quickly learned the importance of living out our faith by how we welcome and protect those that need us, especially the vulnerable stranger in our midst,” she says.

While ad hoc care for refugee families was always part of living out vocation on the border, a more systemic response to the issue became acutely necessary in 2014. In spring and summer of that year, more than 130,000 refugees from Central America streamed across the border into the Rio Grande Valley. A significant number were unaccompanied children, sent by desperate parents with groups heading north to the U.S. in hopes they would be taken in by a relative. Customs and Border Protection was overrun, struggling to provide safe shelter for such a flood of people moving in such a short amount of time.

In response, Sister Norma turned the parish hall at Sacred Heart Church in McAllen into a makeshift refugee camp. The city donated portable restrooms and showers, cots and tents. When a city worker surveyed the scene one day he asked Sister Norma what she was doing. “I’m restoring human dignity,” she said. Her work earned her the recognition of Pope Francis in 2015 during a virtual town hall-style meeting ahead of his U.S. visit. He used Sister Norma’s example as the context for saying a broad thank-you:

Refugees entering the Catholic Charities of the Rio Grande Valley building.

“I want to thank you,” the pope said to Sister Norma. “And through you to thank all the sisters of religious orders in the U.S. for the work that you have done and that you do in the United States. It’s great. I congratulate you. Be courageous. Move forward.”

Two years later, Sister Norma joined Pope Francis at a press conference at the Vatican to launch a campaign called “Share the Journey,” organized by Caritas Internationalis. The initiative aims to help immigrants who uproot and move to another country.

From the parish hall to its current location in two adjoined storefronts in downtown McAllen, the work of restoring human dignity at the respite center remains the same. The numbers haven’t again reached the crisis levels of 2014. There was a surge in the fall of 2016, just before the U.S. presidential election, then a dramatic drop-off. In recent months, the numbers of people leaving Central America for the United States have trended upward. For people who have spent weeks traveling, on constant alert to avoid the dangers of the journey, the respite center is often the first time in a long while they’ve felt welcomed and restored.

“The families walk in and they’re amazed,” Sister Norma says.

“Sometimes they have tears in their eyes because of the joy of being welcomed. The moment they walk through that door, and they enter this room with volunteers clapping and saying ‘Bienvenidos!’ you see in their faces, this transformation beginning.”

The afternoon of Jose’s visit, about a dozen children are with the group. A young mother breastfeeds her child then lays her down for a nap in the nearby crib. After some initial shyness, the other children make their way to a fenced-off indoor play area. “All the worries about the trip stay on the other side of the fence,” Sister Norma says. “Here they can be a kid again.”

Guests rarely stay more than several hours — just enough time to get a hot bowl of soup, a shower, some new clothes and a bag filled with essentials for the rest of the journey. The center’s volunteer staff helps them contact the family member they’re on the way to see and arrange for that relative to purchase the bus tickets for the trip. Before they leave they’re handed a large manila envelope with a printout glued to it that reads, “Please help me. I do not speak English. What bus do I need to take? Thank you for your help!”

The center’s volunteer staff offers clothes and other items to refugees, and helps them contact the family member they’re on the way to see.

And each day, every day, the process repeats. Sister Norma gets a text from the border patrol, indicating how many people they’re dropping off at the bus station to be picked up by Catholic Charities, and at what time. The vans pick them up. They shuffle in. They rest. Then they’re on their way. Days with a lot of visitors are challenging, but Sister Norma doesn’t count hours. “I don’t look at this as work,” she says. “It’s my life.”

Sister Norma recognizes the work does not enjoy universal approval, especially in the current political climate. She traces this partly to the profound effect 9/11 has had here. In the aftermath of the attacks, resources began pouring to the southern U.S. border to beef up security. The wall in Hidalgo was one that was built soon after. And as physical walls went up, emotional and spiritual barriers were erected as well. The attacks caused a sizable portion of the American population to develop (or reinforce) a heightened distrust of the stranger entering the country. While there are real risks to be addressed on the border, Sister Norma believes an outsized emphasis on security can come at the cost of the merciful response children of God are called employ.

And if the physical barriers are a new reality, Sister Norma suggests the spiritual walls don’t have to be.

“They haven’t had a chance to get close,” Sister Norma says of those who oppose her work. “To see that face of that mother, of that child, and when you see that there’s a special connection that happens and you know as a human being you feel the need to reach out and help.”

Courtesy of the University of Notre Dame

2018 Laetare Medalist Sister Norma Pimentel, M.J. Texas Border Business University of Notre Dame, Indiana – It’s a bright morning in Hidalgo, Texas, a small town on the Rio Grande about 60 miles inland from the Gulf of Mexico.

#Hidalgo #Laetare Medalist #Old Pump House #Texas

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timomaraus · 6 years

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April 13, 2018

CNN This school district is arming its teachers with 600 miniature baseball bats (Editor's Note: They are expected to be very effective against miniature terrorists.)

NBC News Man charged with lawyer's murder after accidentally recording confession (Editor's Note: Okay, so not all criminals are geniuses.)

Business Insider Michael Cohen was known to record his conversations--and that could be a 'gold mine' for investigators (Editor's Note: Okay, so not all criminals are geniuses.)

New Yorker Where the Pope Gets His Socks (Editor's Note: Do you think the Pope is wearing wild, zany socks under those robes? His little private joke with God?)

Axios Mitch McConnell to worried GOP senators: "Call Trump" (Editor's Note: You know how some people think Mitch McConnell looks like a turtle? This is him pulling his head back under his shell. Not quite the kind of leadership that will be covered in a future edition of Profiles in Courage.)

TED.com The surprising differences between introverts and extroverts (Editor's Note: I and N. Versus E and X.)

Seattle Times Renowned glassblowing artists will try to make a 24-foot-high bong in Seattle (Editor's Note: John Boehner, take note. Maybe in your new pot-supporting role you could get this thing named the Boehner Bong.)

CNN Even one drink a day could be shortening your life expectancy (Editor's Note: So apparently my life expectancy would have been about 140.)

CNN Where the world's best bartender dine and drink (Editor's Note: Is 'bartender' now one of those singular/plural words, like deer?)

CNN 'Genital breathing' turtle faces extinction, group says (Editor's Note: This whole decline started when turtles began experimenting with tantric sex.)

CNN Prince Harry and Meghan Markle announce wedding photographer (Editor's Note: They've picked a photographer! They've picked a photographer! Oh happy day! Joy, joy!!!)

CNN Obama reassured Comey after election amid email investigation controversy (Editor's Note: From Comey's contemporaneous notes after meeting with the President, he recalls Obama's exact words: "Don't worry, James. When this is all done there will be a helluva book deal for you.")

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kidsviral-blog · 6 years

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Ace and Iowahawk make big funny with ‘Borowitz Comedy Skool’

New Post has been published on https://kidsviral.info/ace-and-iowahawk-make-big-funny-with-borowitz-comedy-skool/

Ace and Iowahawk make big funny with ‘Borowitz Comedy Skool’

http://twitter.com/#!/AceofSpadesHQ/status/307271978937618432

New Yorker satirist Andy Borowitz found himself on the receiving end of the classic “Ace of Spades treatment” today, as Ace and partner-in-crime Iowahawk welcomed their followers to attend #borowitzcomedyskool. Today’s lesson was how to re-create the formula behind Borowitz’s attempts at left-wing comedy: mention a Republican, link that person to pop culture in an absurd way, and maybe accuse him of being a horrible person in the process. Got it?

Andy Levy kicked things off by mocking Borowitz’s post about the Pope.

The worst part of any Borowitz Report column at “The New Yorker” is the “Get the Borowitz Report delivered to your inbox” threat at the end

— Andy Levy (@andylevy) February 28, 2013

I mean, honestly: “He’s the one who should step aside. Call himself P. Biddy or something. This is wack, yo.” newyorker.com/online/blogs/b…

— Andy Levy (@andylevy) February 28, 2013

“‘I ain’t let nobody mess with my brand,’ said Emeritus, who prior to 2006 recorded under the name Notorious P.O.P.E” #humor #satire #lol

— Andy Levy (@andylevy) February 28, 2013

@andylevy @aceofspadeshq “Hey, what if random current event person did something unexpected? I think it would go something like this.”

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 28, 2013

@iowahawkblog @andylevy what if the Pope were actually Don Knotts?(turns back to audience…)

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

Add Ace and stir for instant hilarity!

@aceofspadeshq @andylevy what if Pope Gangnam Style, and also some kind of sequester thing reference? #BorowitzComedySkool

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 28, 2013

Houston, we have a hashtag!

@iowahawkblog @andylevy what if he has a dog that talks?

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

@iowahawkblog @andylevy @aceofspadeshq Who is this borowitz fellow of whom you all speak?

— Legal Insurrection (@LegInsurrection) March 1, 2013

@leginsurrection @iowahawkblog @andylevy he’s the @borowitzreport, a legend of comedy… see his Pope thing for Big Funny

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

And people who aren’t funny, but are in the mood for something that could be recognized at a distance as “humor,” read @borowitzreport

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool What if a Southern Christian was given away for marriage by a pickup truck?

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool A Mexican, a Jew, and a Republican walk into a bar. The Republican is white! Like John McCain!

— Budget Cutter (@lheal) February 28, 2013

What did Mitt Romney say to the dollar bill? “I have lots of you!” Get it? Because of rich! HEYYO! #borowitzcomedyskool

— matt whitlock (@mattdizwhitlock) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool All this talk about Obama lying about sequester is distracting from what Romney did to his dog 40 years ago.

— Derek Hunter (@derekahunter) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskoolAudience voting irregularities make Barack Obama American Idol winner.

— The Morning Spew (@TheMorningSpew) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool The sequester hits Republicans so hard they can only afford to light their cigars with $5 bills

— Nathan Wurtzel (@NathanWurtzel) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Can’t think of any “dumb Biden” jokes but here’s one about Palin forgetting to flush the toilet! Am I right, guys?

— hopeforamerica (@hopeforamerica) March 1, 2013

@exjon #borowitzcomedyskool Tom Coburn was seen gallon-smashing at the Northern Virginia Expensive Grocery Store

— Apologize for WHAT? (@craig_s_bell) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool GOP Sequester Promises Reductions “To Yo’ Dick”

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Taylor Swift Something Something Something Breakup Boyfriend

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

@thepantau @iowahawkblog @aceofspadeshq @andylevy What if Kim Jong Un wore big shoes…like, bigger than normal shoes.

— Landon(@OrwellForce) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool GOP Now Officially Less Popular Than Mimes*(* Mimes = Unpopular Never Gets Old)

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool what if Lady Gaga did something that was normally associated with someone different than Lady Gaga?

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool John Boehner Does Harlem Shake, Which Is Naturally Hilarious Because of the Politician/Dated Culture Fad Juxtoposition

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Something Bob Woodward something something Kim Jong-Un something

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 28, 2013

Man, if I was any funnier, I’d be Matthew Yglesias. #borowitzcomedyskool

— Smitty (@smitty_one_each) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool John BoehnerSomething Something Something The Voice

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowtizcomedyskool Gangam Style Singer “Psy” Drives Like Shit

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool David Schwimmer Now Dating Phoebe Cates; Celebrity Couple Tagged “Schwimph”

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Rush Limbaugh Ejected From Restaurant Because He’s Just Awful, Serious You Guys

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Antonin Scalia, Clarence Thomas POOPIE

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Pity Laughs Make Me Hard

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Eric Cantors Pants are Full of Load… Load

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Pope Tries to Land Plane Just Full of Snakes (Remember, Snakes on a Plane?Great Movie)

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) February 28, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Nobody Puts Baby In a Corner, Says John Boehner, Who’s a Big Fat Orange Baby

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Rectum? Well I Hardly Even Eric Cantor

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Sequester Threatens Closure of Animal Shelters Something Something Baja Boys

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Dennis Rodman and Kim Jon-Un Are a Crazier Odd Couple Than James Mason and Chunk from Goonies

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Singer Prince Now Changing His Name to Something Else That’s Funny

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Obama Locks Republican Leaders In Room Just Like Teenagers In The Breakfast Club Oh Sweet Jesus Please Take Me Home Now

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Debt Looms Like Shark We’re Going To Need a Bigger Boat Sweet Spectre of Radiant Death Let Me Enter Thy Kingdom

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Republican Leaders Lola Falana Una Panoona Blana A Real Man Would Have Pulled the Trigger By Now

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool President Obama John Boehner KHAAAAAN! The Glorious Noose Sings My Name From The Garage

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool 1998 Political Reference 2002 Cultural Reference The Shining Sharp Razor Romances My Throat

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Gay Marriage People… Who Need People… Obama Christian Right The Carbon Monoxide Fills My Chest Like Pride

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Benghazi You-Say Peoplay Gon’ Die? Dexter Jettster IG-88 Mother, Where Did It All Go So Terribly Wrong?

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool What’s the difference between a vitamin and a bullet…? I wish I even knew any more…

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Gang of Eight More Like the Brady Bunch of Six…. Oh God How I Wish Soylent Green Was Real

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool If you take the first letter of my last 200 tweets it tells you what pills I took and how many… please don’t stop me

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool I changed my last name because it sounded “Too Republican”… my name used to be Andy Rape

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool J-Lo Obama Tea Party Dr. Ray StanzThe Greatest Comedy Hero of All Time Is Freddie Prinz Because He Manned Up

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Sequester Jack Kervorkian Madonna Ice Cream My Uncle Told Me It Was a Roll of Quarters In His Lap But It Sure Felt Warm

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Marco Rubio Caught In Affair with Perrier I Just Wanted My Cousin Samuel To Teach Me How To Kiss But He Made It Dark

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Bacon LOLCats Bacon Lady Gaga I Never Felt So Tall As Standing In My Mother’s Heels

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool I don’t want to say that [SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION TERM] Is dumb, but [He/She] just tried to [GOOGLE TRENDING TERM]

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Andy’s Notebook:Super Bowl sounds a lot like Soup Bowl. Write this up for the New Yorker.

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskoolNotebook: Any gas left in the Olsen Twins? What if they got on each other’s shoulders like Master Blaster? Promising!

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Notebook: “Romney” = “Romulan”?Hendrik Hertzberg’s a fucking imbecile; he’d probably think that was funny.

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Notebook: Does Dick Cheney look ilke Darren Stevens? No? Eh fuck it it’s the New Yorker, they can’t tell the difference

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool No seriously the best joke is the New Yorker is now running stuff from America’s foremost Vanity Humorist

— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool GOP Politician Verbs Noun Conjunction 2006 Internet Meme

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Honey Boo Boo, Snookie, and Sarah Palin. Get it?

— Gary Eaton (@garysteveneaton) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool What if Randy Jackson lost a lot of weight & Republicans thought he was Denzel Washington?

— The Morning Spew (@TheMorningSpew) March 1, 2013

#borowitzcomedyskool Why do Republicans hate Al Roker? Because he’s a black man who also talks about climate! #DontGetMeStarted

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) March 1, 2013

See, Borowitz can be funny; he just needs some help.

Editor’s note: This post has been updated with additional tweets.

Read more: http://twitchy.com/2013/02/28/ace-and-iowahawk-make-big-funny-with-borowitz-comedy-skool/

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