#breed specifics too

[sga-owns-my-soul]

if you're going to be mad about dogs chewing things or cats scratching things don't get a fucking animal. ever.

sincerely, a pissed off pet store employee who is sick of explaining that cats scratch things and dogs chew things because it's a natural fucking behaviour

[egophiliac]

Please elaborate on your twst Pokémon headcannons I’m very interested

I had planned on drawing everyone for this (I made a LIST!) but it. hasn't been going well. 💀 soooo here's what I have so far!

Riddle - Roserade (I was going with 'no legendaries', otherwise I would've given him a Shaymin) (and I don't think Togedemaru is actually a hedgehog or I would've given him one of those too) (...they kind of do fit though. hmm.)

Trey - Alcremie (clover/mint cream + strawberry/ruby cream)

Cater - DITTO SQUAD! DITTO SQUAD! DITTO SQUAD!

Ace - Impidimp (I feel like there's probably a better one for him, but I can't think of it)

Deuce - Scraggy (meanwhile I KNOW deep in my heart that this is true)

Leona - Pyroar (but like. a nasty Pyroar. just a grizzly old Pyroar with the shittiest attitude imaginable. they pretend to hate each other but secretly they are a bonded pair, do not separate)

[yellowocaballero]

I admire your commitment to writing tim drake as having spent his formative childhood years on a different awful forum in every universe. it fills a conspicuous void in the fandom ecosystem.

I want to put this ask on my wall. Thank you for understanding me. Thank you so much.

Look, I think there are reasons why characters act the way they do. So often when writing Batfam people put in 0 work into actually establishing why or how a character is Like That, which feels necessary when the character is the most Like That of all time. You end up with a father-son or brotherly soulmates situations and it's bizarre. Why are you adopting this child you saved, you save fifty children a day and there is nothing special about him.

Tim Drake is a fucking freak and there needs to be a reason for that. Child neglect isn't enough. Somebody like Tim needs a very specific thing to happen in their lives to get them to the point of making his decisions. He needs to be obsessive, to spend time in a place that feeds and validates his obsessions, to be in a place where he can easily collect a great deal of data to construct a pathway model, and for all of this to happen without leaving his room. It has to be the internet. Tim is a guy who the internet churns out. I know he's from the 80s but Tim as a person is somebody who is so chronically online in the weirdest way. Not chronically online how WE'RE chronically online. He's on the weird forums. Like those military simulator game forums where military personnel post classified blueprints for future military tanks in order to win an argument. Those kinds.

If you were a domestic terrorist in the early 00s you were probably on Something Awful. All I can say (Actually, technically the SA thing is an anachronism - it didn't actually pick up until the early 00s. But it was the website that worked the best, explained the most, and I fucking needed to make the 'But he wouldn't tell her what the awful thing was' joke, so here we are). This is also the reason for the other anachronism of NW. Homestuck.

[yukipri]

Wanted the share the very first photos I ever took of Cody, on our car ride back from adopting him. He'd just gotten some vaccinations and was drowsy, and the tech recommended I cuddle him so he doesn't get cold.

He was very calm and polite, leading me to mistakenly believe that Cody might be an appropriate name for him.

Turns out, this was the one and only time he was calm and polite...

Cats tag: #YukiPriASLKittens

[octoooo]

More phone doodles

[puppyeared]

Maybe together we can make this whorehouse.. into a whorehome

[ladygodgiven]

we talk a lot about wwii dudebros but we should acknowledge the specific breed of teenage boy who says he's into medieval history but really he's just into christo-fascism and islamophobia

[mayhasopinions]

cracked and made the best bfs some blueysonas

[thecraftgremlin]

How are you guys I’m making a flow chart of all the pikmin types and what colors and names their hybrids might be.

Here are my current findings:

I might draw some of these at a later date.

[collectivecloseness]

oh my god that cockwarming one was incredible 😍😍 can I get your thoughts on breeding with kurt??

Thank you sm cherub!! Haha it was fun to write! And omggggg pls I have such a breeding kink when it comes to writing smut pls. I’m gonna have to write more of this type of stuff in other posts/asks, because I definitely won’t get all my thoughts down in one. (So if you have any other breeding kink asks, send em my way heheh)

Kurt is definitely a little possessive. Not in the typical toxic boyfriend way, so you wouldn’t expect it, or even really be able to see it until much later. He’s just slightly protective of you, if he thinks someone or something is bad. He’s pretty chill though! He’s a feminist after all. But the idea of you being filled with his cum just makes him 🤤😍🤤. Not just in a possessive way though, that’s not even a fraction of the iceberg. There’s so many reasons Kurt loves breeding you

If you’re on birth control or can’t get pregnant or anything, then he asks “oh... so.. so can I?.. In- in there?” He’s a bit shy around any subject of sex at first. The first time you two go at it, if neither of you bring up a condom or anything mid sex, and if you’re lucky enough for Kurt to know he’s about to cum, and be able to hold off for even a few seconds, because that man is cumming before you even touch him the first time, then he may be able to quickly ask you “oh god... w-where?” As he starts to pull out so he’ll be quick enough. But the second you wrap your legs around his thighs and push him back into you, when you beg Kurt to cum inside you, you promise that it’s okay, he actually collapses into your body as he cums inside. Just slowly rutting his hips a little, as he’s a dead weight on the rest of your body. Only just managing to thrust about an inch each way, as the sloppy sounds of his cum squelching around your walls spurs you both on as he keeps going.

Kurt cums a lot, as I’ve stated as my own personal hc before. Not like in frequency, although that’s also true, but there’s just so... much... of it... it’s absolutely insane how one scrappy gamer boy can produce that much cum in one load. And keep going for multiple rounds. Kurt didn’t even realise it was different until you pointed it out, although it was apparently something to (privately) brag about, so he felt pretty proud that he could provide that for you :). You once joked that you were sure if you spent an entire weekend, just making love to Kurt and letting him fill you up for the entire 2-3 days, you’d probably start to look a little pregnant by the end of it. Which actually made his eyes glaze over in a way you’ve seen many times before. He definitely has begged for you two to have that ‘special weekend’. Not that you or Kurt actually wanna see any kind of baby bumps, you both do not actually want that yet.

But it doesn’t stop the thought of Kurt fucking you full make him go feral. He promises he’ll be soooo good. He’s gonna fill you up, nice and warm, and safe, and full, just like you want. Just full of Kurt. A reminder of his love inside you. The most intimate session you could have with another person. Watching his face scrunch up as he cries so close to your head when he orgasms, is absolute bliss on its own. But feeling him pistoning inside you, as his white, thick, seed starts sticking to your walls, hearing him stirring it all up in you as he cries and pants and swears quietly above, as Kurt’s fucking your insides so warm, and wet, and deep, is absolute heaven. You’ve both toyed around with the idea of buying a plug, keeping his cum inside even longer. But Kurt also loves asking if he can ‘watch’ once you two are done. And he’ll lean dreamily on his arms, right next to your pussy, and watch as his cum starts to dribble out. Occasionally he gets impatient, or it may be really shot up there. So he gets this cute grumbly look on his face, before pressing his large palm against your stomach, and smiling with such wonder as he watches his cum pour out of you then, with him rubbing your belly.

There’s something feral, and instinctual about it. Kurt can just let his mind be free, and so can you. As you two grind into each other and just moan and fuck and make sure he’s held against you so tightly, that he’s definitely cumming deep inside you, where it’ll stick. One time, you two were walking around the mall, and your face just lost all blood. You showed Kurt in the bathrooms how his cum from last night was now starting to drip down you, and you both hurried to shove tissues in your underwear, and swab up the cum that was dribbling down your leg, as you were wearing a skirt. The white pearls clinging to your skin, as it escaped you, starting to leak out like a faucet. Kurt hurriedly drove you home, and he felt like a bit of a perv for almost wanting to lick your car seat the next day, when he went to clean up before his job. Even though you were both slightly panicked, as he helped you clean up in the cramped stall, not wanting anyone to come in, or to see you... that image, that thought of that happening again, having happened before, it fuels Kurt’s solo masturbation sessions forever

The dirty talk is insane. Kurt is very cute as he babbles about whatever is on his mind and he can half stammer out, when you two are making love. But sometimes when he gets closer to cumming, the dirty talk riles up as he remembers in expectant bliss whats about to come next. Mostly said in his promising tone, stuttering a little cause he’s close, and so so ready to make you cum, because he knows you love him describing exactly how he’s going to cum in you too. Sometimes it’s babbling as he loses his mind, lascivious thoughts in the back of his mind. Or it can be a mix. But Kurt will talk so sweetly to you about such private things, not just talking, but talking to you, his eyes full of love and awe, or scrunched shut in bliss. His desperation that isn’t rushed, but lived in, knowing that you want him too, you want him to breed you just as much as Kurt wants to fill you so fucking full of himself. Talking while he rubs you down there, and hopes to feel you squirt around his cock (because god, that’s so fucking hot to him), while he shoots his load as deep inside his love as he can get. Any sentence he can choke out, before he loses his control and his mind. “Yeah? Fuck, I’m gonna fill you up so fucking much baby. I love you so much. Mmmm ‘m gonna fill you and fuck you with my cum over and over. ‘M not gonna stop until you’re full down there. Always gonna have my cum inside you, huh? Always gonna be with a part of me? I’m always yours baby. Fuck, you ready? You want my cum? Want me to cum in you baby? Want me to cum all in your p-perfect pussy? Don’t worry. I’m gonna give you what you want. Promise. Gonna cum for you real soon can’t hold on babe!! Fuck fuck... shit!”

You may also get him begging to cum inside you. Crying, or kissing you everywhere, or tantruming while trying to hold you close, because he’s so desperate to not cum anywhere else. To not waste his load, when he could cum inside your pussy. His favourite place on earth maybe. Yeah he also likes cumming on your boobs, and your tongue, and your hand, and other places too. But if he’s in the breeding mood, he doesn’t want it anywhere else. He’ll be begging for you, to prove he’s being good just please don’t tease him, please let him have this!

Kurt wants to be the only one who cums inside you. He doesn’t care if you’ve had past sexual partners before, but the thought of him being the only one allowed to cum in you, that no matter how much he watches you kiss other friends on the cheeks, or cuddle your bestie instead of him, or dance flirtily with your pals, Kurt is the only one who gets to cum in you. And he doesn’t get jealous over others in that way. Kurt’s jealousy is different, he knows you don’t actually like your friends in that way, he knows you wouldn’t cheat on him, he knows you don’t actually love your fictional crush more than you love him. But he does get a bit of fomo sometimes. He just wants all your attention on him, and he understands that’s silly, so he lets you go. He’ll pout about it in his own corner, but he’ll be waiting patiently for you to ask him a question next. He’ll probably just watch you holding your friends hand and wish it was his, knowing he can pick yours up when you’re done, or watch you show your friend the cool new sexy trick you’ve learned of twisting a cherry stem with your tongue, and just hide his own chub while he buys your drink. Knowing he’s the only one who gets to breed you, satisfies any silly little thoughts like that most of the time. And remembering how you beg for Kurt’s cum. Knowing how you don’t want anyone else, from your groaning voice that still lingers in his ears

[darkwood-sleddog]

look nothing but the best to these sort of people but I often see people get into mushing, acquire tons of dogs very quickly and then they commonly have accidental litters (or potentially purposeful...) on yearlings/very young dogs.

it is not cool.

[mellomadness]

sometimes I wonder if I should take a gender studies class just so I can bitch every day about how an imaginary boyfriend is often seen as a requirement for a woman to feel safe enough to have fun at a club, or the idea that an imaginary person with a fake “claim” over me has more influence over predatory men than my own voice saying “No, I’m not interested, get lost”