#broken bow

[wizardofick]

First patch on my hat project :]

[unteriors]

E 10th Street, Broken Bow, Oklahoma.

[giffingthingsss]

Standing ominously.

[agent-troi]

i’m rewatching star trek enterprise for the first time in forever and omg look it’s the coroner from field trip!!

[sshbpodcast]

Bottom Five Star Trek ENT Episodes

by Ames

Everyone’s allowed to admit they’re wrong sometimes, and your hosts here at A Star to Steer Her By take back a lot of the credit we’ve given to Star Trek: Enterprise over the years. Guys, we’re sorry to say it’s just not that good a show. And sure, there are a couple beacons of hope in the darkness, but as a full series it doesn’t capitalize on its merits nearly as often as it should, and the mixed messages can be frankly insulting.

From the terrible theme song, to the constant sexualization of T’Pol, to the strange characterization of its captain as just an angry angry man, to whatever the hell went horribly wrong with the third season, there’s a lot to turn your nose up at in this show. So cringe along with us as we give the big thumbs down to the worst episodes of the show as you read along below and listen to our banter over on the podcast (jump to 1:32:58 for the series wrap) where guest star Liz provides some added flavor. It turns out we really didn’t have faith of the heart after all!

[images © CBS/Paramount]

“Bounty”: Caitlin While the A plot of this episode with the Tellarite bounty hunter is perfectly serviceable, it’s the B plot that warrants a place on this list. For no goddamn reason, T’Pol is going through pon farr, a plot device we’ve been railing against for years. Okay, there was a reason after all: to sexually exploit T’Pol as this show is wont to do as much as it can get away with. It’s just disgusting how much Enterprise makes Jolene Blalock run around in her underwear just to titillate the teenage boys they really wanted to appeal to.

“Carpenter Street”: Jake What a waste of time. Literally! It may not have specifically made our worst time travel stories list, but it’s definitely pointless to force us to watch such a boring and convoluted romp around present-day Detroit to stop some Xindi from something or other. Really, anything in the Temporal Cold War arc is a hot mess. And combining that with the Xindi War makes it all the more baffling. Further, opting to bring T’Pol of all people back in time is a terrible decision, Archer. You’re lucky you have plot immunity, cap’n.

“Damage”: Chris “I’m about to step over a line, a line I thought I would never cross. And given the nature of our mission, it probably won’t be the last,” says Archer, nineteen episodes into season three. After he’s not only crossed the line countless times, but shat on it and did a little jig. In the shit. So claiming that it’s not until he steals a warp coil from the Illyrians that he’s crossed the line is just blatant hypocrisy. Oh, and this is also the episode where we learn T’Pol is a drug addict for purely illogical reasons. What a shitshow.

“Harbinger”: Ames Oh hey, you know what was one of the previous horrible things Archer did before “Damage” but apparently didn’t count as “crossing the line”? Torturing a random sphere builder he found even though he had no proof this guy was bad. At fucking all. And there’s more shit to this episode! It’s got Reed being a big baby because he unfoundedly thinks Hayes wants his job. It’s got T’Pol being a big baby because she thinks Trip might like Amanda Cole instead of her. Everyone’s just a big baby this episode!

“Cogenitor”: Chris Frequently, Enterprise gets the ethical lesson you’d expect out of a Star Trek episode entirely backwards. This is one of those times. Trip spends the episode standing up for an oppressed person who has requested sanctuary, but Archer doesn’t want to risk the new best friendship he’s made with their people, so he throws Charles back to the wolves where they inevitably kill themself. And somehow Trip is supposed to be the baddie? Not Archer, who doesn’t even feel bad? What message are we trying to send?

“Dear Doctor”: Ames Oh look, another time Enterprise puts its ethics on backwards and inside out. This utterly infuriating episode turns Archer and Phlox into genocidal monsters who then pat themselves on the back afterwards for handling the situation so diplomatically. Phlox should be ashamed of himself for being a doctor who spreads misinformation about how evolution works, and when Archer tries to question him, convinces the captain of his deplorably bad science. He HAS the cure, and refuses to save an entire race. It’s vomit inducing.

“Broken Bow”: Caitlin The whole series starts off on the wrong foot with a pilot episode that’s just a hot mess. The plot is almost unfollowable because there are just so many elements to keep track of. None of them interesting. In the very first few scenes alone: the time travel nonsense is just confounding; with maybe the exception of Trip, none of the characters holds our attention; and when we’re not confused by whatever’s going on, we’re just bored, which is a huge sin for a series premiere.

“Precious Cargo”: Caitlin, Jake We start seeing some overlap from your hosts in the episodes that are truly truly terrible. This disgusting retread of “The Perfect Mate,” which was disgusting enough on its own, is further tainted by some really shoddy acting from our First Monarch, a laughable portrayal of Archer and T’Pol incompetently playing good cop / bad cop, and a romance subplot so forced that we couldn’t even enjoy watching two very pretty people going to town on each other because we were rolling our eyes too hard!

“Hatchery”: Ames, Caitlin Don’t worry, we have more bad ethics the show is spouting to go through before the end of this list! For a hot second, it seems like Archer is doing the right thing and trying to save Insectoid hatchlings because it’s the moral thing to do, even in war, and everyone else is wrong to mutiny against him. But we should not have had that level of faith in this show. Instead, Archer’s mind has been manipulated by some goo or other, of course! He was wrong to want to save innocent babies! And he’s the hero of this show, FFS.

“These Are the Voyages…”: Caitlin, Chris, Jake The taste the show leaves in your mouth, when all is said and done, is whatever Chef Riker cooked up in the unexpected series finale. Making the last episode a de facto TNG episode is the wrong choice, as it strips away the ownership of the show from the actual characters as if punishing them for being bad. In fact, they don’t even technically appear in the finale at all because they’re a program on the holodeck! And to kill off Trip – the fan favorite character! – so unceremoniously! Did they hate their own fans?

“Fusion”: Ames, Chris, Jake Like Deanna Troi and Seven of Nine before her, T’Pol gets to get violated for the sake of an episode – and bad episode at that! We’re already pretty sick of watching the women characters have their agency stripped away all the time because the story tells them so. So to watch the usually strong-willed science officer  forced out of her comfort zone and used as a plaything by the worst Vulcan we’ve met (redemption for Vorik, I guess?) is just torture to watch. And the asshole sees no consequences either! Ugh!

“Bound”: Ames, Chris, Jake Like in DS9’s “Profit and Lace,” an attempt to seem progressive backfires so abysmally that we’re appalled by its tone deafness. It’s okay that Orion women are enslaved as sex workers because they’re secretly in charge! The episode treats that perplexing retcon like it’s female empowerment, while simultaneously turning all the men into drooling idiots whenever a woman is around. And unlike TAS’s “The Lorelei Signal,” the women don’t even take charge. Trip does! What a slap in the tits.

—

See also: our Top Five Star Trek Enterprise Episodes list. And if you want more: here’re all the past seasonal tops and bottoms from seasons 1, 2, 3, and 4!

Well folks, it’s been a long road, but we’re finally done with Enterprise. I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to move on to anything but this, even if that means slogging through the Abramsverse and the streaming era. But at least those shows reward war crimes slightly less. So keep your ears on SoundCloud or whatever podcast platform you like, talk to us through our universal translator on Facebook and Twitter, and go where your heart will take you!

[trekoftheday]

[kittensnkream]

Inhale, raise half way.

Exhale, forward fold.

Nude yoga in Broken Bow, OK 🧘🏻‍♀️

[in-fest]

[sensitivelittlevorta]

Enterprise Season 1 Episode 1 and 2 Broken Bow

1:42-1:50 Dude, that looks uncomfortable. Also, the way he pushed his ass through like he was swimming.

2:06-2:15 what the hell was stored in that thing no way that was just the weapon?! I thought that’s like a silo and there is just food in there?! But no?

2:40 OH MY GOD THE THEME SONG OH MY GOD I LOVE IT. HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT THEME SONG?!

6:20 Klingot… Gringotts

7:20 Ooooh, the creepy smile doctor

7:45 isn’t dying because of wounds you got in battle but not in the actual battle actually pretty bad for a Klingon and you won’t go to whatever-it-is-called or is it the same? For the norse it is bad, I remember Thor telling Sif that in the fourth Thor movie.

8:22 (this is terrible, because of mouth movement or translating issues of idioms which don’t exist in other cultures they sometimes have to change sentences and they changed ‘knock you on your ass’ to ‘über’s Knie legen’ which literally translates to laying someone over their knees (so you can spank them (in a disciplining way)) but you can imagine what I thought when he figuratively said he wanted to spank her…💀 )

9:18 oooh, soval didn’t like being called out

10:20 Theee dooooooooggggg. Riiiiighthhtkjadk. They had a dog on board in this series!1!!!!1!!!!!!!

14:30 POOOOOOORTHOOOOOOS111!!1111!11!!!111!!111!!!!!!!111!11

18:20 why does the Enterprise have a disc slot…? Although it looks more like a snow shovel in this shot.🤣

20:04 is the Chinese food in San Francisco in 2150 authentic? Is the food there now authentic?

20:25 What do you think is in your normal day food? There’s literally bugshit in some candies. Don’t be so shocked about the droppings of some alien animal to be used as medicine.

21:27 that grin. That godamm grin. Also I think it made Archer doubt his life decisions for a split second

21:28 I remember that scene!

22:50 yeah… I definitely remember that scene… what a funny joke… third hand… funny… why? he doesn’t even have three hands🥲

24:10 I really wonder if we will still eat meat regularly in 2150. The number of people who don’t is rising, but how high will it rise in the next 100 years?

25:04 how many times did she have to try that?! Also, Archer is not impressed but very amused.

31:00 The Vulcans are out there and really think they know everything and are allowed to dictate the humans how to live life. What about meddling with other species? Oh yeah, my bad. That’s only forbidden until the species can use warp drive. After that they can just tell others what to do and what not to do. This really makes me hate Vulcans, but pretty sure that’s wanted, so…, good writing?

31:31 wäääähhhh!

31:46 wääääh. I don’t want to look at that! Please close him up. I don’t care about his lungs.

35:10 those green guys’ skin reminds me of those red rubbery running tracks. Also, I hate it when they speak a different language and require me to look at the screen to read the subtitles, I have no idea what they said in the beginning because I was looking at my phone

36:20 those jackets look awful. Ugly snake leather jackets

37:03 and you just know those Rigellians are smaller than Klingons?

38:45 are they naked? Are they clothed? Are they both?

39:40 gosh. I remember that scene and I am pretty sure I didn’t like it

40:04 please don’t say anything Trip. You have no idea what’s going on.

40:22-40:43 I told you! don’t say anything! If T’Pol says that, then please believe her. And she is right with interfering. Please don’t gimme anymore secondhand embarrassment.

41:03 can you at least give me one thing an enclave can mean?

43:27 pretty sure being bigger than an alien doesn’t mean you’re also stronger than them or that they don’t know how to turn that against you.

43:45 dude what? Why? Girl?! Why? I wouldn’t want to get kissed by some random alien that’s holding me captive… no matter how attractive they seem to be… Especially when she looks completely different after it!

44:09 and very close contact can’t just be skin contact? Like cheek on cheek? Or just hand on hand? Does it need to be the head? Can’t you just hug him? Why does it always have to be something sexual?

46:18 she dead. (also what kinda run was that steppystep over her and then steppysteprun XD)

46:47 you really should remember where you parked your car. My father taught me that since I was little. I thought Vulcans and Humans of the 22nd century should know that.

52:00 Why is this so sexual? I have no idea what they’re talking about because I am too busy feeling unwell because of that sexual massage thing they have going on.

52:25 why did she just shortly smear the cream on his back and then went to his legs? Surely, he is very capable of doing his legs himself. Can you please smear it on his back? Again, shortly back to the back and then suddenly his shoulders and his ears. He can do that himself? Just smear it in a nonsexual way on his back, please?! Now that we can’t see her doing his back, she is doing his back? They just show the sexual parts, yes? And the normal back one is off camera? Of course. And then he just leaves. Are they even allowed to leave yet? (imagine that with Archer and Shran though. In the same weird sexual way, but they just talk normally about their mission and then leave, and the audience is just hungry for more)

53:23 yummy…

53:43 (why are his legs less hairy than his chest? Is that normal? That’s a serious question, I have no knowledge about stuff like that)

45:30 is it logical to do that?

58:45 safety belts seem to be a good idea in general on board of starships. The amount of times people fly out of theirs seats on those series is way too high to not have seatbelts xd

59:49 that’s the Caretaker's array

1:01:20 Hoshi is about to get a panic attack

1:01:30 is that their tractor beam?! When was the tractor beam invented? That’s just two gacha claws on strings? How do you even aim that? If you miss with them, you have to retrieve them and shoot them again. I love it.

1:01:55 is that making fun of themselves because in the other series their displays also look like that?

1:03:38 would it? I thought nothing beats accidentally killing an alien when you just wanted to stun them…

1:03:58 sounds like you have a few squirrels in the controls

1:06:10 how you know that wasn’t killing?

1:11:08 disco!!! Where’s the music though? That was an elevator? Just more reason to wonder where the music was.

1:11:45 *snickers* *snorts* *starts laughing out loud*

1:13:10 why do those people always claim to know more about someone then the person themselves? I mean it makes sense in this setting with timetravel and all that, but in general, why do they think they know more? They can’t look into their heads, so why do they say that? Just to impress or frighten the other? I would be neither impressed nor frightened. Although I would be frightened to be in those situations in general 😅

1:15:10 is the timethingie going on in there also changing the way sound moves or why can’t neither of them locate the other by the origin of their voice?

1:15:25 that looked like it should have crushed his skull

1:16:00 eeeww

1:15:49-1:16:05 first scene: green running track guy has a strange hold on Archers uniform

                second scene: green running track guy suddenly has Archer in a strange chokehold

                third scene: green running track guy suddenly doesn’t have Archer in a strange chokehold anymore

1:16:25 same. I would be glad to be in one piece too. His face and hands though

Absolute shock on his face of having been beamed and he's still in one piece.

1:17:48 that smile…

1:18:13 The information is in his DNA?! That is small. Very small.

1:18:47 but I want to know what he said?! Tell me, Hoshi!

1:18:54 POOOOORHTOOOOOS. Awwww, his little tail is wagging so hard it’s just a ‘woosh’. Little baby boy.

[greatescapeshomes]

Missouri Vacation Rentals by Owner

Missouri vacation rentals by owner, missouri vacation rentals, lakefront vacation rentals missouri, Missouri vacation rentals homes.

[wizardofick]

First patch on my hat project :]

[uss-birdbrain]

Rewatching star trek Enterprise for the first time since I was like 12, and I forgot how BITCHY t'pol and hoshi were to each other at the beginning. Star trek really did pit two bad bitches against each other

[giffingthingsss]

[coachpurseandacracklighter]

25 years, still missing | Local News | normantranscript.com

[sshbpodcast]

Wake me when Season 1 of Enterprise gets interesting

by Ames

Season one of Enterprise just seemed to fly by, and thank goodness because we’re not finding it all that great, to be honest. Too much of it feels like more of the same stories that previous Treks have already told way better, but with less likable characters, less nuanced writing, and so much sexual objectification that we feel ill just watching it sometimes.

Sure, it’s still probably better than season one of TNG, which had more objectively BAD episodes, but it’s surprising to your hosts here at A Star to Steer Her By just how boring this show is so far. We’ve noted a bunch of times over in our podcast coverage that there never seems to be any stakes because every opportunity for some character (main, side, guest, even background) to get killed, they never do. So grab your phase pistol and see what we had to wade through to get here in our usual bottom and top episodes from the season below and also in this week’s podcast chat (jump to 56:26 for season discussion). Cap’n.

[images © CBS/Paramount]

Bottom Three Episodes

There was a lot to dislike this season and I’m pretty sure we covered most of this season’s dreck in our typically varied responses here. Good work, “Cold Front,” you managed to squeak through somehow despite that terrible airlock scene.

“The Andorian Incident”: Ames If you’ve been following along with our podcast coverage, you’re probably as tired of me hating on Archer as I am of Archer hating on Vulcans, and this is where that sour taste really transpired. It’s a whole episode of our captain going lightyears out of his way to ruin some Vulcans’ day and then patting himself on the back for being justified about being so racist.

“Silent Enemy”: Chris Talk about uneven. What was almost an intriguing suspense episode about the crew being wholly unprepared for the kinds of enemies you find in space is thoroughly undercut by a mismatched B plot that, while cute, is distracting as hell, and by some really laughable alien design. At least Reed gets some pineapple cake.

“Fight or Flight”: Jake Poor Sluggo, we hardly knew thee. Boy, does this show start off with characters it’s just hard to care about. We’ve got Hoshi being pathetic in an “overcoming your fears” plotline so predictable I could have called every beat. And Archer simultaneously being indecisive and whining about his decisions at the same time. And then the metaphor with releasing the slug doesn’t even mesh!

“Fortunate Son”: Jake While it’s unfortunate how little Mayweather gets to do, I can’t say I feel that bad about it considering that everything he does get to do in this episode is annoying as hell. We’d love to see more about his upbringing as a boomer and the culture clash therein, but this episode botches it hard by making all the Fortunate crew assholes!

“Broken Bow”: Caitlin, Chris The whole series really gets off on the wrong foot with a premiere that is simultaneously too little and too much all at once. Between the Klingons, the Suliban, the Vulcans, the flashback scenes with Archer’s dad, the weird time room with the Humanoid Figure, AND introducing us to the whole crew, there are too many things happening, but absolutely none of them are interesting!

“Dear Doctor”: Ames, Caitlin All season long, we’ve been struggling with what we think of the Phlox character, and it mostly boils down to us finding him offputting. So of course the most Phlox-centric episode is in our bottoms list. Certainly helping matters is the fact that both Phlox AND the writers don’t understand evolution at all and use that as an excuse to genocide a people. Oops.

“Fusion”: Ames, Caitlin, Chris, Jake But the one that gets votes from all your SSHB hosts is the episode that sexually exploits the token hot character, as always. Hang on, that doesn’t narrow it down. It’s the one with the mind rapist Vulcan who takes advantage of T’Pol, entirely muddying whatever message about Vulcans this whole season was trying to make. Turns out they’re ALL just monsters, but in different ways, except for one you’ll see in our top episodes.

—

Top Three Episodes

It’s hard to call these “top” episodes of anything, as you’ll see we all pretty much agreed on two episodes this season that were genuinely enjoyable, and each of us frankly struggled to think of a third that we could see giving any accolades to...

“Acquisition”: Chris Listen, we don’t like it any more than you do, but there weren’t enough decent episodes this season and Chris had to include this retread of much better episodes. But you know what: the Ferengi hit us right in the fanservice spot, the veteran alumni are all pros, and aside from all the oomox, it was at least entertaining.

“Oasis”: Jake Back when we were covering season 2 of DS9, Jake put “Shadowplay” on his tops list, so it’s only fitting that he essentially do it again with this carbon copy of an episode. I guess there’s nothing wrong with doing the same idea twice when it’s a good one like this. It’s even got Rene Auberjonois! What’s not to like?

“Fallen Hero”: Caitlin One more “I know that face!” episode coaxing an emotional reaction out of us, which is almost certainly exactly what the show wanted to achieve. In this case, we have to give Fionnula Flanagan some credit for bringing some much needed nuance to the Vulcans, who badly needed it this season.

“Vox Sola”: Ames The final one-off episode that we scraped up to include on this list. And no, it’s not perfect by any stretch, but I have to give it some credit for giving us a truly alien alien, which I’m always a fan of watching our crew interact with. And T’Pol and Sato got to have some scenes together, which is a nice character pairing!

“Shockwave, Part I”: Ames, Caitlin, Chris, Jake Thank goodness for this season finale. Without it, I have no idea how deep into the bench we’d have to dig for other Top Episodes. But I have to hand it to this finale: this was the first time I felt like there were stakes and consequences. And what a cliffhanger! Say what you will about the Temporal Cold War, but seeing a ravaged 31st century scene sure makes things interesting.

“Shuttlepod One”: Ames, Caitlin, Chris, Jake But the one episode I can say we all legitimately liked this season was one of the great bottle episodes of Trek. Proving yet again that less is more, this little character piece leans on the acting chops of Connor Trineer and Dominic Keating, whose chemistry together is lovely to watch. Just super solid all around.

—

Pass the pecan pie, the rocky road ice cream, and the pineapple cake; we’re on for dessert! We’re hoping season two shapes up better overall than this one, so find out with us as we watch along in our podcast coverage over on SoundCloud or wherever you get your podcasts, bounce a message off of Echo One on Facebook and Twitter, and get me a spoon!

[trekoftheday]