#but I had an embarrassing flashback to me sitting in uncomfortable spots during these social gatherings

[purplelurkinghini]

TFW the host doesn't have a dog for you to socialize with, so you end up petting the other wallflower at the party

Yeah, so this is what happens when you don't get it* out of your system while you're still a teenager.

*cringeworthy self-insert fan content

[gingrrfrog]

these nights (10)

word count:4.4k (shorter im sorry 😔) 

warnings: a lot..of smut (maybe like two scenes, masturbation, voyeurism, and male receiving oral sex)

summary: it was never Jaemin’s intention to fall in love with a girl that wasn’t his. 

a/n: unedited and not jeno pov yet because I've ACTUALLY rewritten his wake up scene like four times and it’s not WORKING so...here are sum flashbacks :D 

Jaemin didn’t hate her. That wasn’t the case at all when he first met Yejin. If there was word he could properly use to describe her it would be suspicious, and even then Jaemin didn’t think it fit. He was happy and a bit grateful towards her for making Jeno look and maybe feel happy again, but he wasn’t alone in his suspicious as Johnny and Jaehyun felt the same way, along with Jihyun who maybe was cutting her too much slack than he was comfortable with.

Despite his suspicions, he visited Yejin and Jeno almost daily, claiming a spot on the couch as he usually waited for Jeno as he cared little if Yejin was around or not. It was awkward initially, Yejin walking in with groceries while Jeno was out and looking at Jaemin in surprise, sharing a quiet greeting before she walked back to the kitchen, quietly cooking while Jaemin scrolled on his phone until Jeno came along.

It was more comfortable with Jeno as a social barrier. Jaemin and Yejin spoke very little towards each other at first, until they drank for the first night together, Jaemin realizing that maybe Yejin wasn’t that bad after all. She was funny, she was smart, and she was really artsy from what he could tell in the spare room. He had heard that she was an art student before she left the US, she was thinking about interior design, but gave up on it quickly once she realized she liked creating art than a landscape to sit on.

Regardless, Jaemin noticed. He noticed how Jeno’s eyes crinkled into small crescent moons when she kissed him on the cheek and how he laughed wholeheartedly whenever she told a joke. His heart couldn’t help but to swell in love at the scene, feeling especially grateful towards Yejin the more he saw Jeno relax and let his shoulders drop. That’s why, on her first birthday in Korea, he bought her a paint set, a very expensive one that Yejin couldn’t believe. Jaemin’s ears burned in embarrassment when she hugged him, returning the hug and looking at Jeno, who gave him a smile.

Since that day, Jaemin tolerated her a bit more. Yejin made sure to show Jaemin her newest work that she made with the paint he bought her and Jaemin was always eager to watch her paint whenever she wasn’t busy doing anything else. He watched paint with intricacy, her glasses perched on her nose to reduce strain and hair tied back to prevent it getting into her paint. There were studies all along the walls and corners of the small room, many of them Jeno in varying positions, clothed and not, awake and asleep.

“Do you always draw Jeno?”

“Not always,” she replied, her eyes glued on to the canvas. “Sometimes I draw your brother when he’s not looking. He has nice features to draw.”

Jaemin laughed, “he might kill you.”

“That’s why I’m hoping you’ll keep it our secret,” Yejin looked at Jaemin with a smile.

“Draw me.”

“I have,” Yejin glanced at a sketchbook on a desk. “They’re all in there, I think. Some of you and Jeno, too, I think.”

Jaemin got up from his seat on the couch and walked over to take said sketchbook in his hand. He flipped in them randomly, skipping some pictures of Jihyun where she most likely volunteered to be a subject before finally arriving to a picture of him and Jeno sitting on the couch, casually sitting with food in their hands as they munched quietly to themselves. Jaemin remembered this day, never expecting that Yejin was drawing him the entire time. It’s incomplete though, half of Jeno’s arm is missing and Jaemin’s ear isn’t completely drawn, but there were more along the days and small journal entries on them.

“A study in Na Jaemin,” he recited, “long eyelashes. Not common for someone with an attitude like his.”

Yejin laughed, looking over at Jaemin with a paintbrush frozen in hand, “it’s a study. I’m supposed to be objective.”

Jaemin pouted, “I don’t have an attitude.”

“You did when I first met you,” Yejin said quietly. “Not so much anymore thought.”

“You’re not completely awful to be around,” he smiled, taking the sketchbook in his hands and walking back to the couch. “Do you mind?”

Yejin shook her head, “go ahead. I don’t have anything to hide.”

Jaemin continued flipping through the sketchbook, looking over pictures of studies of her own face every so often with mixes of Jeno around. The dates are increasing closer and closer towards present day, a polaroid tacked on a page from last week and a replica sketched in pencil. Jaemin gulped and looked up at Yejin who was all too concentrated in her painting before looking back into the sketchbook.

The polaroid was a mirror picture of Yejin in sitting in front, her arm wrapped around Jeno’s neck, his lips on her own and his hand grasping her breasts. It didn’t take an art major to realize it was a position of power, and that Yejin had all of it. His eyes lingered on her sketch and the attention to detail on Jeno’s hands, every vein and muscle etched effortlessly by her own. He took a deep breath and closed the sketchbook, desperately trying to ignore his dick twitching in his pants.

Yejin looked over at him then, her head tilting in curiosity, “you okay?”

“Yep!” He smiled, “gotta pee, I’ll be right back.”

Yejin nodded as Jaemin quickly left for the bathroom. He’s a man for the love of a god, of course his dick is going to get hard at the sight of softcore porn in his hands. Are there more books like that? More…pictures? He couldn’t help but to imagine being the next subject of a lewd art, his hands on her, her hands on his co—

“Fuck,” he gasped, hips stuttering as he came all over his fist. His breathing labored as he cleaned himself off quickly with toilet paper, trying to ignore the fact that he just masturbated to the idea of his best friend’s girlfriend.

Jaemin found it hard to look her in the eye after that. Not just that day, but the days that followed afterwards, Jaemin’s hand would sweat whenever she patted him on the back. It also didn’t help that Jeno was never the jealous type, not caring that Yejin would curl into Jaemin’s side every so often whenever the three of them decided to watch a movie. What was it like to be so carefree with your significant other? Jaemin was almost positive that he would never let someone like his significant other get so close to someone the way she did with him. Curious, Jaemin decided to ask during a job when they had nothing else to do.

“Do you ever get jealous?”

Jeno looked up from his phone, “of?”

“Yejin…hugging me?”

Jeno gave him a confused look, “no? Why? I like that you guys get along?”

“It doesn’t bother you? That we’re close?”

Jeno shook his head, “not really. I think it’s nice.”

Jaemin stared at him in disbelief before shaking his own head, “you’re amazing, Lee Jeno.”

“Thanks?”

The three often went on trips as well. Jaemin was always a heavy sleeper in comparison to either Yejin or Jeno, but tonight was an exception as he woke up to the sounds of the bed creaking next to him, his eyes widening in the dark as he slowly turned his head to the source. If it was appropriate, Jaemin would laugh at the awe. Of course, of course, they would be having sex with him in the room, and of course his dick would choose to get rock hard at the moment.

Jaemin swallowed harshly as he watched Yejin rock her hips back and forth on Jeno, her hands resting on his chest to steady herself as she let out soft gasps and small sounds. Jaemin watched as Jeno reached up chest to take her nipple in between his fingertips, groaning gently as his hands moved back to her hips.

Jaemin was so hard it hurt, his dick straining against his pajama pant as he was almost certain there would be a wet spot if he would touch himself right. But he wouldn’t, this was wrong and there were lines that he wouldn’t cross and—

“So good baby,” Jeno whispered, low enough for Jaemin to hear. “So pretty, you like how I’m fucking you, Angel?”

Yejin would only respond with a whimper of his name, leaning back into Jeno’s hold as he took control.

“Such a good girl for me, Yejin. Do you want to be a good girl for Jaemin too? Hm?”

Jaemin froze in his spot. His dick was most definitely spewing precum at this rate. He couldn’t help himself, not with Yejin moaning Jaemin’s name next. Jaemin nearly came when he finally wrapped a hand around his cock, limp flicks of his wrists as he strained his ear to listen to Yejin’s moans.

“Do you want to wake up, Jaemin?" Jeno asked, flipping them so that Yejin was on her back, his hand reaching for her mouth. “Do you want to have him fill you up just like me, baby? Fuck you until you can’t breathe?”

“No.”

“No? Then what do you want, Angel?”

“Want you both,” she cried, a little louder than the whisper register, “want you in my ass and Jaemin in my pussy.”

Jaemin almost groaned out loud, spilling in his hand as his orgasm violently shook through him. His eyes rolled to the back of his head as his teeth met with the pillowcase, using it to just barely muffle out his moan. He continued to mindlessly stroke his cock as he listened to Yejin orgasm under Jeno, moaning out for both of them as Jaemin went through another dry orgasm.

He sat in his cum until both Yejin and Jeno fell asleep, which was about four am when Jaemin sat up, sticky, uncomfortable and feeling a bit disgusting at the fact that he had just masturbated to both of his friends. He frowned and looked at the mess in his pants, folding them in themselves as he opted for a quick shower instead, changing into new clothes before laying back in bed and waiting for the sun to rise. There was no way he was going to be able to sleep after this.

If it was difficult to look them in the eye when he saw Yejin’s naked sketch imagine how difficult it was for Jaemin to look either of them after the eye after the trip. He distanced himself afterwards, only for about a week which would be normal for other friends but different from them. Jaemin was almost around them 24/7 and he missed them after about three days, but lucky for him, his brother had a mountain of work he could help him with, which settled the ease only slightly. Of course, Jeno or Yejin would call, asking him where he was to which Jaemin would respond with a picture of himself and the mountain of paperwork on his desk and an appropriate sad emoticon. Yejin would send another sad emoji before wishing Jaemin to work hard and take a break whenever he needed one, whereas Jeno would just send a frowny face.

Finally, after the week was finished and his assigned work was done, he made his way towards Jeno and Yejin’s apartment, where Yejin was the only one sat on the couch, her eyes brightening and her smile extending.

“Jaem!”

Jaemin smiled, “hi.”

Yejin extended her arms, Jaemin quick to fall in them and sigh, smelling her shampoo and realizing just now how much he had managed to miss her.

“I missed you,” she said quietly, her lips at his ear as Jeno tried his best to ignore it.

“I missed you more,” he kissed her forehead, a small bit of affection that they were used to before he sat down next to her on the couch. “What are we watching?”

“Just a movie until Jeno comes back.”

“Where is he?”

She shrugged, “he said he had something to do really quick. It shouldn’t be much longer; he’s been gone an hour now.”

Jaemin nodded, watching as she scooted closer to him and moved his arm around her shoulder, giving Jaemin no other choice but to hold her close. He didn’t mind it initially, as it was innocent enough for him to ignore until her hand rested on his thigh, drawing mindless shapes on the fabric of his pants. Jaemin swallowed and tried to ignore those as well, wondering if Yejin noticed how high up she was drawing on his thigh.

“You okay?”

“Huh?”

Yejin laughed, “your heart is pounding. Is the movie too scary?”

“Er—no. I just had a lot of coffee before coming here,” he lied, not entirely sure if it was believable or not.

Yejin sighed, squeezing his thigh and sending Jaemin into a panic. He clenched his eyes as she lectured him about his caffeine intake and how he should cut down for his own sake. He muttered a few okay and whatever’s but her hand still resided, and he wasn’t sure how many times he would be able to inconspicuously fix his junk until she realized that something was wrong.

“You must’ve drank a lot, Jaemin,” Yejin’s eyebrows are close together as she looked up at the man. “Are you sure you’re okay? You’re really fidgety.”

“Maybe I overdid it with the espresso shot today,” he said simply. He looked down at his lap and winced as he saw the outline of his cock pressing against his jeans. He took a deep breath and looked back the movie, running his hands hastily through his hair as he tried to pay attention.

“Jaemin…”

“Yeah?”

Yejin chose her words next carefully, “I’m not trying to say this as a joke, but is that your phone in your pocket or…”

They both noticed his phone on the coffee table and Jaemin’s ears burned red in both embarrassment and fear of what was to come next. Yejin pulled away only slightly, tilting her head up at him as Jaemin bumbled and stuttered to give a logical explanation.

“I—it’s not you because—it’s just—“

“Do you want some help?”

Jaemin blinked repeatedly, “sorry?”

Yejin bit her lip and moved her hand over the bulge in his pants, watching Jaemin flinch. “I can help, if you want.”

Jaemin panicked internally, looking around the house for any sign of a camera or a prank or Jeno hiding somewhere around the house, “w-what about Jeno—?”

“Don’t worry about Jeno, I can take care of him,” she said quietly, her hand squeezing his length, smiling at Jaemin’s groan. “I can take care of you too, Jaem, if you let me.”

He gulped as he nodded reluctantly, watching as Yejin took his answer and moved to his pants, doing his zipper and moving her hand inside to straighten out his cock, listening to Jaemin’s moans with a smile. She hummed at the sight of his length, taking the tip in between her lips to press a sticky kiss on top. Jaemin covered his mouth in awe and to mute any moans that might come out. Yejin noticed and took that same hand to put on top of her head, smiling once she finally took most of it in his mouth.

“Oh, fuck,“ he gasped, his fingers knotting in her hair as she bobbed her head, swallowing around his cock as spit and pre-cum spilled over. “Yejin—wait—“

“Sorry it took me so long!” Jeno’s voice came from the doorway, a cold rush of fear pumping through Jaemin as he tried to pull Yejin off.

She only moaned louder, sending stronger vibrations through the length of his cock as Jaemin bit his knuckle.

“I had trouble finding the banana milk you wanted, baby and I—” Jeno stopped in his tracks, grocery bags in hand as he made eye contact with Jaemin first, blinking before looking at Yejin who continued running her mouth up and down Jaemin’s length. “Oh.”

oh? Is Jaemin about to die because he was horny? He watched as Jeno placed the bags on the table, walking over towards the two as Yejin popped off Jaemin’s dick with a lewd sound, looking up at Jeno as he smiled down at her, taking her face in his hands.

“You couldn’t wait for me?”

Yejin shook her head before Jeno leaned in to kiss her sloppily, a small peck before they pulled away. Jeno patted her cheeks and beamed, “good girl.”

Jeno looked at Jaemin and laughed at his expression, “chill out.”

“My dick is out and it’s in your girlfriend’s mouth and you’re not going to kill me?”

Jeno shrugged and shook his head, “No. I told you it doesn’t bother me.”

“Jen—“

“It’s fine, Jaemin, I promise.” Jeno laughed again, “I’ll be back in a second.”

Yejin laid her head on Jaemin’s lap, purring as Jeno ran his fingers through her hair. “She likes when you eat her out, by the way. Just in case you wanted to repay the favor.”

“I really hope you do,” Yejin said, a special glint in her eye.

Jaemin would be stupid not to.

It became a reoccurring habit after that. Not only was he around for sex, but he was around for naps, for dinner and for movie nights where Yejin would splay herself on both Jeno and Jaemin, her feet sometimes on Jeno’s lap and her head on Jaemin’s, or vice versa. Jaemin even had sex with her when Jeno wasn’t around, leading to more intimate sessions as Jaemin counted the freckles on her back with his lips. The more time he spent with the them, the more difficult he found it for him to leave, which led to him staying over more than he should, causing suspicion on his brother’s part as to where his brother was and why he wasn’t coming home.

Jaemin was napping on the couch one day when Jaehyun came to find him at Jeno and Yejin’s apartment, Yejin stepping to the side and letting him in as Jaehyun slapped his brother with a magazine on their table, waking Jaemin up quickly as he looked around for the culprit.

“Hyung?” He yawned, “what are you doing here?”

“What are you doing here?” Jaehyun scolded, ���are you shamelessly bumming off Yejin and Jeno and staying in their home without paying rent?”

“I stay here sometimes.”

“It’s been two weeks, Jaemin.” Jaehyun said quickly, “if I go in that room and I find that there are more of your clothes in their closet than there your own at home I’m going to drag your ass to the car.”

Jaemin narrowed his eyes, “that’s an invasion of privacy.”

“Ask me if I care Jaemin,” Jaehyun narrowed his eyes next, “I have a job for you. Now.”

Jaemin rolled his eyes and turned on the couch to face his back towards his brother, only for Jaehyun to yank him by his side burn, Jaemin crying out in pain and pulling at his brother’s hand, “ow, ow, ow, I’m coming! I’m coming!”

“We’ll see you later Yejin,” Jaehyun said. “I’ll take this fucking parasite.”

Yejin only replied with her lips pressed in a tight line in order to stifle a laugh, blowing Jaemin a kiss as he was dragged out the door.

It when he returns that night while Jeno and Yejin are in bed that he realized how much they both meant to him. He walked into the bedroom as Jeno is the first to extend his arm, causing Jaemin to snuggle in between the two of the as Jaemin fell asleep quickly. He didn’t just like being around them, he loved being around them, he felt comfortable he felt safe and happy and…Jaemin thinks he might love them both.

He brought it up at dinner the next day with Jeno, Yejin falling victim to another one of Jihyun’s night’s out. Jeno had noticed that something was picking at Jaemin’s brain the same was Jaemin was picking at his fish, not really eating but just removing the bones.

“Sorry, my cooking isn’t that good.”

“No, that’s not it.” Jaemin shook his head.

Jeno raised an eyebrow, “are you okay?”

“No? Kind of?” Jaemin bit his lip, “can I be honest with you?”

“Of course.”

“I think,” Jaemin cleared his throat. “I think I love Yejin.”

“You think?” Jeno laughed quietly.

“Don’t be a dick, Jeno. I’m being serious.”

“I know you are. Sorry, go.”

“I think I love Yejin, but I think…” Jaemin huffed, dropping his chopsticks. “I think I love you?”

“This is the worst confession I’ve ever heard.”

“I’m being serious, Jeno!”

“I know you are! I love you too, Jaemin—"

“Not like that, not like friends.” Jaemin shook his head again, his ears turning red as he struggled to understand his emotions. He’s never had feelings for a man before, and he’s almost positive that he never will if they aren’t directed towards Jeno. “I think I love-love you. The same way I love Yejin.”

Jeno was quiet, chewing to himself as he tried to take into consideration Jaemin’s feelings. “Oh.”

“Oh?” Jaemin repeated.

“I do actually love you, Jaemin. I’ve told you that already, so I don’t mind. I don’t care that you love Yejin either, because I think she loves you too.”

Jaemin gnawed at the inside of his cheek, “so? Now what? We’re all in love with each other?”

Jeno shrugged, “why not? It doesn’t sound like a problem to me.”

Jaemin blinked, “but, how are we going to do it? It’s not that easy there has to be more to it— “

“I can’t imagine that it’s any different than what we’re doing right now. But if you want to move in with us, we might have to get a bigger bed.”

Jaemin laughed, “this place doesn’t have room for a bigger bed.”

“Then we’ll get another place. We’ve been wanting to move out of this apartment lately anyway.”

“You’re serious about this Jeno?” Jaemin started skeptically, “I’m technically the mistress.”

Jeno scoffed, “you’re not a mistress if we’re both fucking you.”

Jaemin’s ear turned red, “don’t say it like that.”

“Love making?”

Jaemin rolled his eyes, “whatever it is. Are you sure?”

“Do you really love me?”

It was Jeno’s turn to roll his eyes next, “yes. I really love you Jaemin.”

“I don’t know how I’m going to explain this to Jaehyun hyung.”

“I honestly don’t think it’ll go that bad,” Jeno reassured. “He’s your brother, not to mention 10x more understanding than anything your dad would’ve been.”

“You think?”

“He seems fine with Doyoung and Taeyong hyung being together.”

“Those are his friends, Jeno. Not his brother.”

“Regardless, I think you’ll be fine if you want to tell him. But if you don’t, then you don’t have to. It’s not a big deal.”

It took Jaemin a month to muster up the courage to tell his brother. He even studied how Jaehyun spoke to Taeyong and Doyoung, watching for any kind of hidden homophobic reactions but there was nothing, just a man talking to his two friends. The night he decided to tell Jaehyun was the same night Jaehyun was sitting in their father’s old office, doing work as Jaehyun every so often sighed and flipped the page.

Jaemin swallowed, scratching his head before putting his paperwork down, “hyung, I’m…moving out. Tomorrow.”

Jaehyun looked up from his computer, raising his eyebrows in surprise, “oh. Okay. Thanks for telling me.”

“You don’t want to know why?”

Jaehyun shook his head, “you’re twenty-one, Jaem. You’re old enough, I thought you would’ve been moved out by now, living with Jeno or something.”

“I am living with Jeno, and Yejin. Both of them.”

Jaehyun gave him a suspicious look before he nodded his head, “oh…kay.”

Jaemin bit his lip, “as their boyfriend.”

Jaehyun froze, blinking repeatedly before looking at his brother, “sorry, what? Their? Plural?”

“Yeah…plural.”

“Are you coming out to me right now, Jaemin?”

“Kind of?” Jaemin cleared his throat, “I don’t really think I like guys like that, but Jeno…is different. Yejin, well, she’s a girl so there’s nothing to worry about biologically there— are you mad?”

“Why would I be mad, Jaemin? Taeyong hyung and Doyoung hyung are gay.”

“I know, but they’re your friends, not your brother.”

Jaehyun laughed almost in shock, “Jaem, I love you either way, you know that. I’m kind of disappointed you thought otherwise.”

“Better safe than sorry.”

“I guess if there was something I am confused, it’s about you being with both Jeno and Yejin…” Jaehyun started, “how does that work, exactly? How is Jeno not ripping out your throat?”

Jaemin huffed, “your guess is as a good as mine, honestly.”

“If you’re happy, then it doesn’t bother me. How long has this been going on though?”

“Officially? Like a month.”

“Unofficially?”

Jaemin shrugged, “maybe like a year?”

Jaehyun laughed, “Jesus Christ.”

Jaemin laughed with his brother, his breathing coming easier now that the weight had been lifted off his chest. He went home that night to both his girlfriend and his boyfriend who were cooking dinner in the kitchen. Judging by the smile on his face, both Jeno and Yejin made the assumption that the talk went well, both giving him his fair share in kisses before they sat down to eat.

Since then, it was everything Jaemin could’ve possibly dreamed of. This domesticity of all, the arguing with Yejin about his misplacement of socks, Yejin’s snores, Jeno’s rare but pungent farts, Jaemin wouldn’t give it up for anything in the world, and all he could think about was how lucky he was to have two soulmates in a world where people don’t even get the one.

On a rainy nights, snowy mornings, and sunny afternoons, Jaemin lived the unspeakable privilege of being in love, and having twice the amount of love being poured into him, it’s no wonder why he never wanted to leave. Jaemin always used to roll his eyes when Jaehyun used to muse lovingly about Jihyun whenever he was drunk, but he liked to think he understood why he put up with her for so long, regardless of their initial bumpy relationship, it was all faith. The belief that it would get better because you were putting the effort into yourself to be better not just for them, but to be a better person all together.

Yes, Jaemin wanted to be better. He wanted to be the best of them all.

masterlist

previous

next

[imgoldielikehawn]

The Long Road Ahead: These Words

Paring/ Jensen Ackles x Reader

Rating/  A for Angst

Word Count/ 1,895

Part 1 Here

@anotherwaywardsister

  The coming weeks were some of the most trying for both you and Jensen. When word got out of Jensens and Danneels marriage issues they started treating Jensen differently on set which only made things worse. You were scheduled for scenes all day long and didn’t really have time to go over and check on him as often as you wanted to.  It had been a long day of action sequences and honestly you were exhausted as you made your way back to your trailer.  You flopped down on the couch and opted to send Jensen a text instead of going over in case he was still filming for the day.

  When you got to Jensens trailer you noticed it was quite frankly a pigsty and made no point to hide your disgust.

“Jen what the hell?” You frowned immediately heading under the sink for a trash bag.  

“I forgot to clean things up before I left for set this morning.” He said embarrassed.

“This morning? This is from a few days, Jen this place is a disaster. I know you’re having a hard time right now but I am not about to be best friends with a slob.” You joked piling Chinese boxes and chip bags into the trash bag.

You picked up the trash while Jensen tossed the clothes and other things in the laundry bin. You stood back to watch him clean up and took the time to really look at Jensen for the first time in a long time.  His hair had no gel in it and he was wearing the same shirt from yesterday. His pants had a stain on them and you were pretty sure that he’d been eating like crap since Dani broke the news.

“Jensen?” You asked patting the seat beside you.

“What?” he asked coming to sit down next to you. You took note of the fact that he slipped deep into the couch. It looked like he sat in the same spot every day.

“Umm, when is the last time you took a shower?” You asked hesitantly and he groaned in response giving you your answer.

You smacked your hands against your knees and stood up from the couch. Jensen made a face as you walked over to the bathroom and turned on the shower. The sound of the water hitting the shower wall made him groan again and he stood up and walked to the bathroom door as you stepped aside.

“I’ll be here when you get out.” You crossed your arms and walked back to the couch.

“You know I’m a grown man right?”  He rolled his eyes pulling his shirt over his head.  It was very clear in that moment that Jensen was no stranger to the gym and it showed. His shirt slid over his abs giving you a perfect view of his freckled torso and you swallowed deeply. The discomfort you felt only worsened when you looked over the top of your phone at the sound of his belt hitting the floor. You didn’t know whether to panic in silence or make a scene.  You thought about just getting up to leave but you already said you’d be here when he got out.

“Jensen! Can you strip inside of the bathroom?” You said trying to keep your voice even.

“Ace we’ve been Best friends for 23 years. You act like you’ve never seen me naked.” He chuckled taking a step inside the bathroom.

“The last time I saw you naked was when I was in college and I’d like to keep it that way!” You smirked and shook your head.

He made some smart remark that you couldn’t make out rolling your eyes you went back to your phone. The news of Danneel asking for a divorce had not hit social media yet and for that you were grateful.  You didn’t know how much Jen would be able to handle all at once and with just the notion of impending divorce he wasn’t doing well. You vowed to keep an eye on him from now on and even more so if the two of them could not work things out.

Jensen came out of the bathroom thirty minutes later in nothing but a towel and you did your best to control your face expression.  He walked to the back room and pushed the door closed behind him leaving a generous sized crack as light shined out.  Clutching your hands to your chest you decided that it was time to get the hell out of there.

“Alright Jen I’m going to head out; I have an early morning tomorrow!” You called out loudly getting up from the couch.

He sauntered out of the bedroom is nothing but pair of plaid sleeping pants and you fought back an eye roll.

“Where’s your sense of modesty Ackles? “ You raised an eyebrow and sighed.

“Never had one.” He smirked and pulled you into his arms for a hug. You weren’t very tall to begin with so you fit into his embrace perfectly just as you always had.

“Alright big boy, that’s enough of the sappiness. Go to bed and try to get some sleep.” You pulled back and reached up to ruffle his hair.

“You haven’t done that in a while.” He smiled and rubbed the back of his neck.

“You haven’t needed it.” You shrugged and turned towards the door.

“Night Ace.” He shifted oddly from one foot to the next.

You gave a cocky salute and headed down the stairs shaking your head again as the door slammed shut behind you. The walk to your set took longer than expected and you couldn’t help yourself as you replayed the sight of Jensen coming out of the shower over and over again in your mind. “I don’t have time for this.” you scolded yourself.

That night was spent tossing and turning as you tried desperately to find sleep.  Your dreams were filled with old memories of you and Jensen growing up. Memories you had buried after all these years and with everything going on your friendship with him was more important than ever.

  The next morning was an early one as there was a meeting before shooting for the day.  The meeting was about the upcoming trips to the man cons happening this year and that you all would be tagging along during some of the supernatural cons as well.  What shocked you the most was the talk of a few of you appearing on a few of the Supernatural episodes including the Halloween Special?  After the meeting broke you each reported to makeup and settled in for the long day ahead.  The scene you were in required a flashback so your hair and clothing resembled a traditional pin up look and your outfit was quite uncomfortable.  The stylist was finishing up with your hair when Jared came storming the trailer.

“Danneel is on set and it is not going well.” He blanched and you knew it was serious.

“I’m not needed on set for a while do you need me to come with you?” You asked wearily.

Jared nodded and you got up from your seat after thanking the stylist and headed out into the cold October air.  The walk to the set was silent and before you knew it you were standing at Jensens trailer door listening to the screaming coming from inside.

  “ YOU KNOW WE WOULDN’T EVEN BE IN THIS MES IF YOU WERE EVER HOME!” Dannis voice reached a level you had never heard and you stopped in your tracks at the first step.

“IM THERE FOR YOU GUYS WHEN I CAN BE! IM DOING MY BEST HERE, ITS NOT LIKE I DON’T WANT TO BE HOME WITH YOU GUYS!”  Jensen screamed back.

  you started to wonder where the twins and “JJ” were and you looked expectantly at Jared.

“The Kids?” was all you said.

“ JJ is at her grandparents and the twins were with them the last I checked” He sighed.

You gave it a few more moments before you walked up the steps and knocked on the door. You felt tense but knew that no one else was going to put an end to it and if you couldn’t get them to stop at least you could remove the twins from the situation.

The door flew open and Jensen appeared red faced and the veins in his neck throbbing.  

“Now is not a good time Y/N” his voice was strained and his pupils were large and darted back and forth.

“I’m not here for you.” You frowned, unimpressed with his behavior.

Moving past him so saw Danneel holding one twin with tears in her eyes and her hair disheveled but even in all this stress she looked absolutely gorgeous.

“They can hear us can’t they?” She sniffed.

“Yeah Dani, they can all hear you. I just came in to see if you needed help with the twins so you two can finish your conversation.” you lowered your eyes awkwardly.  

“There is nothing else for us to talk about. I won’t keep you from your children Jen but I can’t do this anymore.” She turned to Jen.

“But I love you.” Hearing Jensen Plead with Danneel made you uncomfortable and you regretted walking through that door.

“Love is not enough baby, I need support. I’m exhausted and stretched thin. We’ve been doing this for seven years. Seven loyal years I’ve been by your side and we have a beautiful family; but I need to do what’s best for me and our babies and that means taking care of myself.” She Passed Zep to you and walked up to Jensen and planted a kiss on his cheek.

“I just need some time to compose myself and then I’ll be back to get the twins Y/N.”  She said looking over at you. You nodded and watched her walk out of the trailer. Jensen walked to the back room looking torn to shreds and you couldn’t help the pang of guilt in your heart.  You had never seen him this way about any woman in all the years that you’d known him. Danneel was “The one” and he was shattered you stood there with Zep pulling at your shirt and Jared walked into the trailer.

“Where is he?” He asked.

“I think he’s in the back with Arrow.” You jerked you head in the direction of the small bedroom.

Jared walked back and closed the door behind him and was back out in a matter of minutes with Arrow in his arms. He had bundled her up and brought out a small blanket for Zep.

“I think he needs some time.” He said and handed you the blanket.  After wrapping Zep up the two of you headed out of the trailer and took a walk.

“What are we going to do?” Jared said aloud more to himself than anyone.

“We’re going to gear up and be there for our family. That’s what they are, Family.” You leaned forward and planted a small kiss on Zeps forehead and sighed.

“It’s going to be a long year isn’t it?” He said stopping to look over at you.

“Yeah it is Jare… it really is.” you fell in stride beside Jared as the two of you continued to walk the trail……

[such-a-common-girl]

“Home” Carl Grimes x Reader

Word Count: 2,300ish

Carl Grimes x Reader

Summary: In a world where Carl was the victim of Negan’s killings, reader recalls her relationship with Carl throughout the years with a series of flashbacks, leading up to her current day predicament.

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, implied smut, death

In honor of TWD new episode premiering in an hour!!

Flashbacks are in italics.

It was Carl’s eyes that attracted you first.

You two had met a long time ago, back at the farm. You were sitting inside your house, playing with your sister Beth when his dad carried him in. You remember the first time you had seen him for real was after your dad, Hershel, had performed surgery on him and everyone was sure he was going to be ok. You were so excited to have another person there around your age. When you looked at him, you thought he was so cute. His eyes were the most beautiful blue you’d ever seen. Of course, you never told him that.

“Daddy, who is that little boy?” You remember asking your dad after he finished the operation. “Is he going to be ok? Who are all these people?”

“His name is Carl. He was shot on accident, but he will live. He might like to meet you after all of this dies down. I don’t think their group had another little kid in it.”

“Boys are gross.” You had crinkled your nose.

A few days later, you happened to be walking into the kitchen when you caught a glimpse of him. He was still in pain from getting shot but he was doing better.

“I’m Carl.” He had told you. He had eyes just like his fathers did, only his were prettier. Freckles were covering his face, and he was wearing a sheriff hat.

“Y/N.”

The two of you were just little kids back then, and an instant friendship hit off. The two of you were inseparable, doing everything and anything together. You were there for the death of his mom, being the only one to comfort him since Rick had gone off the deep end.

You watched as Rick started crying once Maggie and Carl told him the news. The baby was born, but Lori died. You couldn’t help but shed a few tears yourself hearing of her death. She was such a nice woman to you and had always treated you like a daughter of her own.

Rick left, and by doing that he had left Carl completely by himself.

“Carl?” I had gone up to him in his cell one day.

“What do you want,” He had asked you dryly, as if he hadn’t spoken in days.

“I want absolutely nothing from you.” You had sat down next to him. He had looked up at you with tears in his eyes, but nothing ever fell. You pulled him into a hug, and the two of you stayed like that for hours, embracing each other.

The two of you had kept it strictly friendly until you arrived in Alexandria. Between being separated for months, to Terminus, there had been too many bad events after the governor blew up the prison for the two of you to explore anything different. But as soon as you got to Alexandria, and things calmed down, everything changed. When Carl saw you all dressed up at the welcoming party, he couldn’t deny his feelings for you any longer.

You pulled the dress over your head, looking at yourself in the mirror. You looked nice. Someone had lent you a dress to wear, which felt odd wearing since you hadn’t worn a dress since you were twelve. The fabric was comfortable but still beautiful, and it felt like a luxury. You had on makeup for the first time in your life, and your hair was down for what felt like the first time in ages. You always kept it up in a ponytail.

“You look beautiful, Y/N.” Maggie had told you. “You’re going to be the star of the show.”

“Doubtful.” You had laughed. “I’m still not sure how I feel about being here.”

“Me neither.”

“I wish Beth and Dad were here.” You had said quietly.

The party was awkward for you at first. Everyone seemed to know each other very well already, and you being a shy, quiet person did not help your socialization skills. Carl had seen you by yourself in the corner when he came up to you, linking his arm with yours. He looked really nice, and you couldn’t deny it. He was an attractive guy.

“Don’t be a loner,” He had said. “I met some people here around our age. You should give them a chance.”

“I’m never a loner, Grimes.” You smiled at him. He loved your smile, it made his heart weak every time he saw it.

“You look really good.” He gulped, sounding nervous.

“You don’t look too bad yourself. We clean up nice.”

He introduced you to everyone, and they all seemed nice enough. But you weren’t interested in spending time with any of them, not really. You just wanted to be with your best friend.

At some point during the night, you pulled him away to get away from the stuffiness of the room.

“Too many people,” You had said after the two of you got outside. You were walking around the streets, something that you hadn’t got to do for a long time with a sense of safety.

The two of you were holding hands as you walked, something that you always did. Both of you always said it was just a friendly thing, to other people and each other, but the both of you had felt inside that it was more.

“This is nice. I kinda like it here.” You told him. “I’m not exactly comfortable with it yet, but for now, I decided I’m going to enjoy it.”

“Y/N, I like you.” He had blurted in response, something completely off topic, but you hadn’t cared.

“What?” You wanted to hear him say it again.

“I like you.” He said it more quietly that time.  You looked into his eyes, bringing your faces together.

“Well it’s a good thing I like you, too, Grimes.” You whispered, and brought him into a kiss.

Things had gone well for a long time. The two of you were officially together, at least as together as you could be during the state of the world. The only problem had occurred when Ron decided that he liked you, too. It was a big deal- Carl was very protective boyfriend, and seeing Ron try to break you too up did not go down well.

“I’m going to kill him.” Carl growled, pacing back and forth inside of your room.

You had just told him about how Ron had come up to you earlier during the day and attempted to make a move on you. At first, he was just telling you how beautiful you were. This wasn’t a big deal to you- it was just a compliment, nothing to make a big deal about. But then he mentioned something about how Carl couldn’t make you happy like he could. And then he tried to kiss you. He almost got close to touching your lips before you realized what was going on and you kneed him in his weak spot.

You had debated whether or not to tell Carl. You knew that there was a lot of friction between the two of them, and this would just make it worse. But you also knew that if someone had made a move on him like that, you would want to know.

“I already put him in his place, please don’t.” You had begged.

“Too fucking bad. He doesn’t get to touch my girl.”

You watched him as he stomped out the door. You were going to follow him out the door, but decided that you would rather not see Carl beat someone up.

Turns out, you didn’t get that choice, because Ron happened to be walking by your house when Carl got outside. You could see it all from your window.

Carl didn’t even say anything as he went up to Ron and punched him in the face. You gasped as Ron stumbled slightly, but before he could hit back, Carl clocked him again.

This went on for what felt like forever, although you’re sure it was only a few seconds, before Rick came and broke it up. You thought he was going to yell at Carl, but surprisingly, he just gave Ron a stern look and told him to go home.

When Carl came back into your house, he had started kissing you with more hunger than you had experienced from him before. Sure, you’ve made out before, but it was usually quite innocent as the both of you were very inexperienced.

“You are mine.” He had told you, picking you up and setting you on the bed.

“I’m yours, Carl. Only yours.” You moaned as he started kissing your neck.

Things picked up after that. Ron never messed with the two of you again. The two of you were undoubtedly in love with each other- everyone could see it. Besides the sneaking around to have sex, the two of you were well accepted by the group and no one protested like you two had thought they might- especially Maggie. Being her only living relative left, she was quite protective of you.

“So, we need to talk.” Maggie had come up to you one day while you were washing clothes.

“Okay.” You set down the shirt to give her your full attention.

“You and Carl are getting serious, right?”

“I guess, yeah.” You had shrugged.

“I’ve heard some… Rumors about the two of you guys. I just wanted to make sure you’re being safe.” Maggie looked uncomfortable. She loved you with all her heart, but she also knew that she couldn’t stop you from doing anything.

“Where exactly are you hearing this from?” You had questioned her, starting to panic. You thought that the two of you were being sneaky and no one had known that you took your relationship a step further.

“Daryl might have seen you two hooking up while he was on night watch. And I might have heard you guys before when you thought you were alone.”

“Oh my god.” You had blushed, embarrassed.

“We didn’t want to make you guys feel embarrassed. We just all want you to be safe, Rick included.”

“Rick knows?!” You had basically yelled. You wanted to die right then and there.

“He might have also heard you guys a few times when you thought you were alone.” Maggie looked like she was going to start laughing at any moment.

“Please kill me. I can never face anybody again.” You had groaned.

Besides the relentless teasing you experienced after that, you two were happy as you could possibly be. You two would be with each other at every given moment of the day, except for at nights when you were forced to go home. But half the time you would just sneak out to see each other, anyways.

When Alexandria came under attack, you thought you were going to die. Carl was the one who kept you calm and collected as you walked through the walkers. He kept squeezing your hand in reassurance the entire time. But then the plan went to shit when Sam started freaking out. Sam got bit, which made Jessie get bit. Which lead to Carl getting shot in the eye.

For a while after that, Carl refused to talk to you. He wouldn’t let you see him, no matter how much you told him that his eye being gone would not change your opinion of him.

“Don’t come in here.” He had warned you from his room, you standing in the hallway.

“Carl, you can’t avoid me forever.” You sighed, leaning against the doorway.

“I’m ugly. You’re not going to want me anymore. I’m hideous.” He sounded choked up.

You had enough. You walked into his room, and touched his shoulder, him still standing with his back to you.

“Let me see.” You whispered. Carl turned around slowly, showing you a bandage wrapped around his face, his eye socket covered.

When you didn’t say anything, he turned around quickly and pushed you away.

“Get out of here.” He whispered, tears forming in his eye.

“Carl,” you turned him around. “You’re the most handsome man I have ever seen in my life, regardless if you are missing an eye or not. I still want you. You are not, and never will be, ugly.” You poured you heart out to him.

“Thank you, Y/N.” He smiled. You pulled him into a kiss, making sure to be gentle as you didn’t know his pain level.

“I love you.” You finally said. You had been wanting to say that for a long time, but were waiting until the right moment.

“I love you, too.”

Things were finally going smoothly after that. The walls of Alexandria were rebuilt, Carl’s eye socket healed (he looked the governor, but you would never tell him that- he was already insecure), and your group was doing well after everything that had happened.

Carl was coming to terms with the fact that he lost his eye, but it was still hard for him. He acted like he didn’t care, like he was this big, strong man, but you knew better. He was insecure. But things were getting better.

That was until you met Negan.

You can remember that night like it was yesterday, all the events of what happened. They’re fresh in your memory, leaving you with nightmares every night of what happened.

You were all forced to sit on your knees in a line as you met the leader of the Saviors.

You were scared, although you wouldn’t admit it. You kept glancing down over to Carl, waiting in anticipation for the man to show up. You knew something bad was going to happen. Rick had killed a bunch of his men, and now he has your entire group in his lineup- it wouldn’t end nicely.

The era of power surrounding him was like none you had ever experienced before. He was immediately directed towards Rick.

The way he spoke to him, it was so condescending and power filled. It terrified you.

Then he started taunting everyone as he chose who he was going to kill. He turned a child’s game song into something entirely different, very sadistic.

It landed on Abraham.

Nobody dared to say anything. Especially not you, once you heard Negan’s threat to cut out Carl’s other eye. You cried, the tears blinding your vision, but you could still hear the whack of his bat bashing in Abraham’s skull.

You thought it was over. He said one person.

But then he dragged Carl out.

And started bashing in his head.

You couldn’t control yourself this time. You started screaming and reaching out for him, but one of Negan’s men stopped you. You sobbed and screamed as Carl’s head eventually turned into nothing, just smashed brain and blood.

Negan was laughing at this, at all of this. You tried your hardest to escape from their grips, but you couldn’t.

“You, what’s your name?” Negan came up to you.

“Y/N.” You spat. The group watched you, looks of terror filling their faces. Maggie started crying, thinking she was going to lose you.

“I thought I said not to fucking get up, what the fuck happened to that?”

“You just-“ You couldn’t even finish your sentence, you were crying too hard.

“Oh, were the two of you together? My apologies.” He laughs. “Not.”

“If you weren’t so fucking disrespectful and you knew how to listen, I’d make you one of my wives. Goddamn shame.” Negan continued.

You thought he was going to kill you, but instead, he just moved on to keep talking to the group. Taunting them, tearing them down.

You still missed him to this day. He was the love of your life, and he would always be in your mind. You would never forget about him.

“What’s up, Y/N? You look like you’re about to cry like a little baby.” Negan showed up. He snapped you out of your thoughts, your memories of what you and Carl were.

“I’m good.” You smile weakly, hoping to fool him. You don’t show weakness around him. You can’t, not if you don’t want to be punished.

“Great, ‘cause I need my good girl right now.” He snakes his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

That night, he didn’t let you free. He took you in as prisoner, but his lust for you outgrew his anger. He was never going to let you leave, he let you know that every single day. He refused to make you one of his wives, and although he still claims that he doesn’t fuck anyone outside of them, he makes some pretty bold moves on you.

The only thing that gets you through the day is reminiscing about Carl, remembering the good times you had with him.

You tell yourself every day that you will get out of here. You will go home, you will see your sister again. But the longer you’re there, the longer you give up hope that you’re ever get to leave. You’re watched every moment of the day, whether it’s by Negan’s minions or by Negan himself.

Negan takes you to the bedroom, but doesn’t stay in there with you. He just slaps your ass and walks away, locking the door behind him. You walk over to the desk, grabbing a pen and writing out a couple simple sentences, letting a tear fall onto the page as you slammed the journal shut afterward. The person it was directe to wasn’t ever going to see it, and Negan would kill you if he saw it, but it gave you hope. Hope that everything would be ok.

‘Rise up, Rick. Save us. Bring me home.’

[mar-gega]

No Regrets (Part 3)

So it turns out I’m a people-pleaser. I was thinking of posting it during the weekend but all the great comments from you have only spurred me on!

Word count: 2.1k+ (you’re welcome!)

Warnings: Some angst, swearing.

A/N: Say hello to Natasha, the Avengers’ cheerleader!

Remember PART 2?

Well, let’s kick it off with a flashback!

Director Nick Fury’s Office

‘So it appears that there are a couple of punks that are up to no good. They’ve been spotted shopping for radioactive elements in India’ There are only Fury, Rogers and Barnes in the room. Best keep in small, Fury thought to himself.

‘Are they planning an attack?’ Steve was showing concern in his voice. ‘That’s what we don’t know. But why else would you be looking around for those elements? They’re-‘ He reaches for the phone and presses a few buttons. ‘Y/N? Can you bring me the files of those guys in India?’ He ends the call and turns to Steve and Bucky. ‘Gentlemen. Let’s take five’ and just like that he’s out of the room.

Steve turns to Bucky, a devilish smile spreading across your face.

‘So… I’ve spent some time with Y/N today’ That got Bucky’s attention. He looks at Steve, unsure on where he’s going with his story. ‘There are no men in her office, barely any in the lab, none in Fury’s department. I cannot imagine where she’d found a guy to ask out!’ ‘Just drop it, Steve, I’m sure she would just want to move on…’ ‘I can’t let it go, you know that, that’s not my style’ he smiles and stands up from the chair and strides towards the large window, taking in the view of the city.

'Why don't you ask her out? She's just your type!' the blonde probes his friend. 'Come on, Steve, she's not interested in me, I'm sure...' 'How do you know? Bless her, she could do with some cheering up, when I finally find out who the asshole that turned her down is I'm gonna knock some sense into him' 'Oh give over, Steve, so the guy's an idiot for rejecting her but he must have had his reasons...' there’s an annoyance in his voice but he’s uncomfortable with the subject so he decided to keep his voice down. Steve walks back towards the desk and gently strokes it, as he moves to the other side. 'Well what reason can he possibly have to reject Y/N?' he sits in Fury’s chair and he smiles. He can get used to this office! After a moment of self-indulging in a little fantasy of his he turns to his friend and exclaims 'Well I'm not having her sulking over this, if you're not interested then I'm going to ask her out!' 'What?! You've never been interested in Y/N before!' anger evident in Bucky’s voice, he closes the distance between the two. ‘But YOU have and if you’re not willing to admit it then I’ll make you’ he spins in his chair, enjoying it as if he was a 5-year old child. When he faces Bucky again he’s met with a death stare. Great, just what he wanted!

‘Come on, Buck, as if I didn’t notice you always volunteering to drop off the intel, always making sure you showered first and looked your best, you couldn’t care less what info we got from the mission, why do you then care so much that it reaches the Intel Team, huh?’ But instead of admitting there and then Bucky huffs in anger and leans over the blonde ‘Don’t you dare ask her out, you’re not serious about her’ he hisses and points the finger towards Steve’s face. ‘And you are?’ ‘GODDAMIT STEVE!’ Bucky slams his fist on the desk, luckily not causing any damage. Steve just chuckles in response. ‘Oh boy, you’ve got it bad, don’t you?’ Just this second the door opens and Fury steps in. ‘What the hell is going on here?’ Both of the soldiers stand up in shock. ‘Just gossiping’ Steve murmurs. ‘Well if you don’t mind me interrupting you, LADIES, I’ve got the profiles right here…’

Present day

Today you decide to come to work early, there will undoubtedly be a lot to catch up on, the downside of having days off is when you're back at work you're always few steps behind on the action. You love an early morning walk – outside it’s a little foggy but fresh, just what you need before submerging yourself into workload. Once in the lobby of the building you head towards the lifts and wait patiently - you're feeling rested and energised, cup of coffee in hand, here bright and early; nothing can spoil your day. Right?

'Well hello there...' you hear a deep voice behind you. You turn to see a cheeky grin and bright chocolate-brown eyes 'is that the lady that stole the super soldier heart?' You can't recall if you've ever seen Sam Wilson without his uniform but that boy has some style. Clad in plain black t-shirt, low hung jeans and leather jacket he looks effortlessly cool. Or it might just be his demeanour? 'Oh morning, Sam' you smile 'how are you today?' You chose to ignore his little remark in hope of changing the subject. 'Great, great! You?' 'Very good actually, just back from couple days off so I'm ready!' You attempt to lighten the mood and bring your coffee up suggesting toasting with it. 'Ready for the super soldier action?' He quirks an eyebrow, still smirking. Your smile fades a little. How does he know about your encounter with Steve? 'Erm, soldier action? What?' That lift is taking its bloody time! 'Now come on, the Cap was dead excited to see you today, and Bucky...' he stops when his phone rings 'Excuse me, I have to take this' you smile politely and breathe a sigh of relief when the beep of the lift signals its arrival.

Bucky? What?!

On you way up you can't help but analyse what Sam said. So Steve has been talking about you. Ok, you can deal with that. But what does Bucky have to do with it? You can't imagine he confessed it's him who you originally asked out, he'll be far too embarrassed to admit it. Unless... they both just sat down and had a good old chuckle at your expense. Sure, you can just picture it in your head – both soldiers sitting in Fury’s office, laughing at your expense, feeling sorry for you and planning your further embarrassment.

You are pulled from your thoughts when you are greeted by both of your co-workers in the office. 'You're in so early?' You inquire. 'Fury has a big meeting today, they're prepping for an away mission. That intel we got was geotagged so they have some possible locations to infiltrate' You can't believe it, you go away for two days and that's when the interesting stuff happens? 'Seriously? Who found it?' 'Well actually is was on the USB that you decoded after their last mission' you smile instantly, feeling really proud of yourself. You might be socially inept but you're damn good at your job! This feeling carries you for the next couple of hours until Natasha casually messages you to meet her for lunch.

You should have known that lunch was just a pretence to lure you in and talk to you about the Captain. Again. At first you are polite and hold the conversation but the more she pushes the angrier it makes you. She would never understand the humiliation you endured, but she tries to give it a positive spin and that only infuriates you more. ‘Oh give me a break Natasha! I'm sorry but what can you possibly know about feeling rejected! You have men drooling over you left, right and centre!' You voice cracking in frustration. Natasha waits a few seconds, her face turning red, her bottom lip shaking slightly, she appears distressed and you've never seen her like that before. You seem to have strike a chord… 'Oh you think you're so different, Y/N?!’ She hisses looking you straight in your eyes. ‘Because how can I possibly know what it's like to offer your heart and soul to a man to have it thrown back in your face?! It's not like I offered to give up my life and run away from everything just to be with someone! You have no idea what real rejection feels like, missy!' Her demeanour changing with every word, gone is the slightly shaken and nervous woman, she is gradually replaced with an angry one. The redhead practically growls the next words 'tell me something, Y/N, do you face a prospect of never being able to have a family?! Or maybe you can never truly be yourself in fear that one second of carelessness can destroy the life you've created?! Or maybe-' she's closing the gap between you, so close you can feel her breath. Droplets of her spit land on your face as she screams the last words 'maybe you've been brainwashed for years and incapable of human emotions?! Any of that sound familiar to you?! DOES IT?!' A single tear travels down your cheek. First from shock at her behaviour, then in realisation. You've only just remembered the time when Natasha confessed in you about the conversation between her and Bruce in Clint's house and you now feel like the most awful human being on earth. There you were moaning about a man who clearly just wanted to cheer you up, meanwhile Natasha offered you support when she's the one who had an actual pain to fight through. 'Natasha, I'm so sorry...' you begin but your voice is cracking, more tears stream down your face 'I'm such an idiot!' The redhead closes her eyes and takes a deep breath but you try to continue with your apology 'I can’t even begin to imagine how awful it must have been for you to go through it with Bruce... please forgive me!' Another sigh escapes her red lips. She's always immaculate, so well put together, even when just seconds before she was growling in anger, she's still looking as gorgeous as ever. 'Thank you, Hun. I'm not saying your situation doesn't suck but you can make it better. Just get your head out of your ass and go talk to Steve' she grabs both of your hands and smiles 'It's too late for me but you're still in with a chance' you smile back. Your eyes are fixed on her - this woman in front of you has been through hell and back, has to constantly watch her back and she's lost all hope in ever falling in love herself. But she's still able to have such compassion and a degree of optimism to cheer you on. You stand up and embrace her - you hug her so tight, one arm wrapped around her back, the other squeezing her waist tighter to yours. You bury your face in her hair and when your hips meet you squeeze her ever harder. And she reciprocates, giggling when your breath tickles her neck. 'I'm so sorry' you say but your words disappear in the air, muffled by her hair.

You don't know how long you stay in this position but it's the catharsis you both needed. When you finally pull away and look at each other your faces are blissful. ‘Dessert?’ Natasha sends you a cheeky wink which makes you laugh and you know all is well between you two.

Back in your office, for the next hour you focus on catching up with emails and planning for next days' work. You are though interrupted by the phone. It's Director Fury. 'Y/N? Could you come to meeting room 2, we've got some questions about the files, was wondering if you could talk us through them?' 'Of course, sir, be there in five!' You quickly tidy your desk and head out upstairs.

When you enter the room you are greeted by a little cheer. There's Natasha, Tony, Vision, Sam, Steve and Bucky. Fury jumps right in with the questions. You explain how you can tell from some of the images attached to files where the files were saved, which could give you an indication on a possible enemy base. Everybody is looking at you with interest but that's the attention you enjoy – when it’s strictly professional you don’t mind an audience. It’s when you become the butt of the joke you could just crawl into a hole. 'Thank you, Y/N, does anyone have any questions?' Steve raises his hand at Fury's prompt.

'Yeah, I got a question. Maybe after we're back from this mission I can take you for a drink?' Natasha smiles and nods at you encouragingly. You meanwhile blush a little, embarrassed to be put in the spotlight. Following Natasha's advice you decide to 'give it a go'. You smile widely and look Steve straight in the eyes 'Sound great! ... Captain' he chuckles at the official title. Then you hear a snap.

Everybody looks in the direction where it came from. Bucky just sits there, angry expression on his face and a broken pen in his right hand. Steve smiles even wider, then turns to you 'It's a date then!'

Has Steve redeemed himself?

Any feedback?

Do you guys want Part 4?

PART 4 HERE

Tags:

@i-had-a-life-once @emilygr57 @vivianbabz @fab-notfat @vivalestwins @buckyb-avengers @mytasterpeculiar @38leticia @sebbys-girl @therealme13posts @50shadesofyes @isaxhorror @typical0001 @hurley3352 @blissful-fantasy @iluvyewman-blog @sebbytrash @smile-sugar @cojootromuelle @cecifina @illuminationunknown @flightofthefantasies @science-of-deduction-sh @bexboo616 @azaleawardrobeo @widowvinter @clairese1980 @masks-of-beauty-blog @wintersdoll @goldwanderer @douleu-passion @ship-it-girl @manders2487 @ailynalonso15 @cami23593 @mytasterpeculiar @ballerinafairyprincess @shamvictoria11 @jasura @magsimovna @eileenlikesyou-maybe @miss-37mm