#but I'm just so used to not having explanations that i kinda just categorize them as oh well that's how it is

[3point14a]

OK SO SOME PEOPLE ARE INTERESTED IN OUR PUPPET AND ILL TRY TO EXPLAIN MYSELF OVER HERE because 1) I dont think it's a good explanation really :,3 (still working on it) and 2) since we are still working on it (magic system killing us) I don't think i should put it on my art blog or whatever given it may change ToT not how they (the twins) are per se but the explanation of why the hell they r even like that

so yeah! a lot of text under the cut! i don't guarantee any of it makes sense!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok so first of all: Choco you were so right about most of those guesses you did holy shit.

It's both. Pup is trans and identical to Mai and they r both afab, demi-boy he/they, Mai is demigirl she/they, silly as hell. And for the horrible part?? Uh buckle in because this is a lot of us just trying to make ourselves understandable at all

Ok so. Ok so. What the hell are shadows. 

Fhs (Mainly Zero) tells us that shadows are a manifestation of people's negative emotions, the worst sides of them. We really really don't like this, shadows being "things a person is suppressing" 1) because we just don't really like it as a trope?? Like, the demons will get you in the normal people way, you will explode in the normal people way, we don't need magic to make you explain what's wrong with you it will show eventually. (we also think  it takes away some responsibility to the characters, if they act out, bc of their shadow instead of that just being a human quality.) 

And 2)  because Fred being grouped in there just feels bad, we know he's the "exception" and that's why he's special but we don't like it irregardless, it takes away from his personhood to be in that shadow category if theyre going to overall be categorized as smth that “is” someone else's, and therefore we just have to come up with a new magic system!!! easy peasy right?!?!?! (no)

In canon, we really just do not know what's up with mai and pup (puppet) (pup is shorter and they match with 3 letters lmao). Like, Pup just gets into the shadow world??? for no reason??? And they don't even look like a shadow at all? Why is bro still the same, what were they doing there, how did he get there? are they a shadow or not or a secret third thing?? what is going on, someone help. We also thought it'd be fun to make them opposites to fred and freddy. So if those guys are 2 people in 1 body, then Mai and pup are 1 person in 2 bodies (not really) ((kinda?))

Like,,,,what in the world is up with jitter doll?? if you read the lyrics none of it really? makes any sense? it has a bunch of machine imagery and language that doesn't really serve any purpose? Lyrics go on and on about the singer (pup) being sort of a machine, cables and malfunctions and unable to love, and he's also weirdly chill about it ??? Like hes over there saying "I feel like I'm going to blow up and they'll get rid of my body. They'll kill my foul heart" and smiling??? Like incredibly chill about it?? So we smashed our heads trying to give the twins something cool and also make ANY HEADS OR TAILS out of jitter doll.

So.  Machine stuff. Shadows. Something something. Here's what we have right now and what will maybe probably change: Shadows are sort of souls leftovers.

Souls (for now) Have limits? They hold feelings and thoughts and stuff, but when something is too much to handle or when you forget something inconsequential or when you cry or laugh or yell and get rid of excess emotion, that doesn't just disappear. It kinda groups together and becomes a weird invisible thing laying motionless in a corner.

"How do you end up with a shadow?" You are,,,, fundamentally empty. The shadows just by innersia look for some sort of host or vessel or whatever. If your soul has enough space (you don't really feel much or do much or whatever, fundamentally empty) Then they get in there, which doesn't really happen often?? Because most people aren't just empty lmao, sorry Freddy.

Once there the body does some fuckery unconsciously and realizes there are 2 people in here and separates both souls and whatever, like i said, work in progress magic systems are hard and they are killing us. But yeah it doesn't happen often,,, but there is another way shadows start existing,,,,,,,,,,,, and it's by the love put into a craft.

So when you do art, you put "your soul into it" right? Well, when you put passion into a project and pour your everything into it, and when that thing is still somewhat broken, they can take over it! So let's say, haunted painting? Yeah that's a shadow, that painting was made with love and care and yet it remained unfinished because the painter died. But here is where our entire thing will get weirder to explain: Video Games.

Passion project video games, and that good old trope of "The game becomes self aware" but forrealsies. Sometimes you take your silly game with you and it gets possesed?? It's somewhat normal in their society by now. Not fully normal? Like, they still get treated weirdly because "why is that video game character alive" or questioning if they are even alive, dehumanizing stuff and somewhat feared! The inherent human terror of "the creation betraying it's creator" and the "machine uprising" that already gets said in our world, is a lot worse when the machine ACTUALLY becomes sentient. But it tends to follow a certain pattern.

For no rhyme or reason, SOME copies of some games have characters gain conscience, the government in fear of the aforementioned "machine uprising" makes them a body that's as human as possible to keep them from lashing out (whatever that means), they pass off as humans. There are 2 exceptions to this, Pup (the one you care about) and Red (oc)((who invited her))

This isn’t about Red so I’ll refrain from explaining them beyond “didn’t take over a character but over a bunch of glitches”. Pup Didn't take over a game at all! 

Mai and pup are based on the puppet from fnaf right? There's another puppet in fnaf called "security puppet" which we were like "haha their mom" and it snowballed. To have that puppet that was in charge of looking after children, associating the fnaf puppets with tears (tear marks), and the immediate neuron activation of the hit song "its been too long" I was like "she's super protective of her child" and the reason for that protectiveness was insanely warranted.

To put simply, marinette (mai's legal name) ((the og child)) was just sick. Always, forever, just incredibly sick and frail and it hurts to look at because damn that little girl should be jumping on trees and not just in pain at the hospital. Her mom cried over her a lot. All that was on that girl's soul was mostly pain, sorrow, sadness, all of that stuff.

One day! her body had enough!!! and wanted to literally die! It didn't! however, to save "her" her soul sort of split into two and got rid of what was always overflowing (negativity), the puppet has this entire thing of “giving gifts and giving life”, a second chance to live and a gift to be able to not be sick anymore. And so, parts of shadows and parts of her actual soul mixed and mixed and left her just fundamentally wrong. And the phone that she had to call her mom in case of emergencies (or if she felt bad at all) was pretty bare bones and somewhat broken (old), and it only really served as a way to call, it had no games or apps or anything except for some photos of Marinette. Jumpscare, the photo is now alive. 

Anyways Pup gets a body, and first of all that just creeps the hell out of their mom, obviously. New thing just starts existing and looks identical to your child, talks like her but without any real emotion behind it? Her husband left her over keeping Pup because they never really agreed to have TWO children and it was enough with ONE thing that just went in and out of the hospital and burnt money. And yet her child was healthy again after it, and they looked identical, and it’s hard to hold a grudge against someone who has the face of the person you love the most, and it’s also hard to look them in the eyes.

Pup's mom loves him, for sure, she was definitely relieved when he came out as trans and was way more visibly unlike Mai. She couldn't just leave a child that looked just like hers to fend for their luck in another place. It's complicated, with good reason, that woman is stronger than I could ever be.

Pup and Mai both ended up messed up, because that was never meant to happen and because souls and shadows aren’t meant to mix and they lost stuff on the way of splitting (sort of spilled out?) So they both lack a lot of stuff, and also are insanely dependent on each other to function (one in the same).

Mai is overbearing, just by nature, she can’t feel sadness and she can’t feel most of anything that isn’t happiness, she’s impulsive and easily distracted, she can’t read people feeling bad and she can’t give any other insight than “just get over with it and focus on the good ^^” (inspired by her advice in al reves) because she can’t really do anything aside from that. Every bad thing they have felt either registers as somewhat inconsequential or doesn’t really feel like actual sadness, it’s just an excess of energy that makes them angsty and hyper and stuff. Mai also cannot taste stuff, and also does not feel temperature at all, pup does that for her. Both of them are unable to really feel fear, awesome for them (it’s not).

Pup is sort of nothing, they are not empty but sort of insanely muffled, he feels strongly for nothing and doesn’t have any passions or any desires or any anything, he also cannot feel pain, Mai feels it for him. Calling back to Jitter doll, his chill nature to absolutely deranged stuff and the machine language and fred “having something he could never have” is explained that way. He doesn’t fear stuff, he isn’t angry at stuff, he cannot love people, or not in the way that most or any people describe love at all. He doesn’t understand feelings and he doesn’t understand people and he doesn’t understand himself. And he searches for some sort of answer to what they hell they are. Because both of them are aware they were the same person, both of them are aware that they aren’t anymore, and both of them are aware they don’t really function how people should. 

You might have seen that we draw them with eyepatches (or have started to do that) ((new lore called for new designs lmao)), and that is the greatest indicator of them being connected in a weird way. Marinette had a birthmark on her eye, Mai (as the original body) has it on her covered eye and Pup has it mirrored because haha the photo was mirrored. The eye with the birthmark is actually the eye of the other twin, and when they don’t have it covered they just share thoughts, which obviously gives them both a massive headache, which is why they cover it. "wasn't pup unable to feel pain?" fun fact! headaches are not really actual pain (for the most part), they are pressure and tenderness in the scalp and stuff like that! So they are not free from headaches lmao

Pup wants to feel fulfilled, like an actual whole person, and he has no clue how to achieve that in the slightest. But because they perceive what happened to them as supernatural (how else do you describe that) they both went into ghosts and stuff like that. 

They both walk around and try and find ghosts and ask them stuff, they ask people stuff about local legends and local hauntings to try and get some lead on what they are and how (or even if) they can fix themselves. Pup reads a lot more than Mai and is a bit more obsessive with understanding what is up with them. Because while Mai is also messed up, she at least is still regarded as the child they both were, their mom looks at her in the eyes. Hence my little drawing of him with a bunch of books and torn apart pages. In the stories they’ve seen ghost take over lives (took over marinette’s face), they are uncaring (like pup), and a daughter WAS lost, neither of them are Marinette anymore. 

Pup, by feeling all muddled and devoid of most feelings at all, is still attached to the idea that they could become one again, while Mai, who is unable to be anything but positive, is certain they are different people now and forever. Pup is also attached to not seeing himself as alive (?), as a program (what ppl like him r called) and being technically artificial he thinks of himself as a robot, as something lacking that human spark, hence the entire robot thing in jitter doll, they use that as a way to sort of cope with how wrong they are because otherwise it really just sets in that they are simply unfixable. A robot or a ghost or an android or some spirit, whatever you want, except an actual alive person. 

Also calling back to them both just sort of appearing in Fred and Freddy’s mind in the show and all the weird meddling they do with them both. Like how pup is implied to remember meeting fred in the shadow realm thing cause he says “haha this feels familiar” when freddy asks for their name, or like mai saying “it's easier to notice someone's absence when they are always beside you ^^” and stuff like that. They have some dream insanity at camp.

Camp to us us is the end of the world and an insanely important event, due to close proximity all the people related to shadows sort of start sharing dreams, which is nice for no one, and which definitely sparks those two to be insanely invasive in hopes of discovering something new in their mad chase for any answer at all, Rip Freddy and Fred I’m sorry they are like that (inspired by them being voted as enemies in the series, at least according to the subtitles, i think she says friendemies but that also works irregardless) 

They are just not really good friends to most people, and even worse to Fred and Freddy. They sort of see Fred like a thing, like something they can get answers out of and something they can learn from, they dehumanize him a tad and it’s not done with actual bad intention, they aren’t trying to be bad people or anything, but then again they are just fundamentally wrong, and the absolute worst at feelings. Pup in general already dehumanizes himself so what’s the damage of doing it to someone else?? 

They also make Freddy feel unwanted, they treat him as a gateway to see Fred, and that messes with Freddy because everyone always asks for Fred, like, people like Fred more than him, and he’s just the means to get that. 

HGHGHGHGHG ANyways if anyone got here thank you so much, sorry this is so long and if it answers nothing, like we said, magic system is killing us. However I love them both too much to not draw them even without a set magic system so i couldnt hold back from drawing them </3

Last thing: Did you guys know mai and pup's songs respectively start at the same time in their episodes???????? That's so creepy why would they do that??? t2e7 6:56, then t2e8 6:56. What.

But yeah to anyone or everyone who was curious thank you so so so so much for showing interest :D And I'm very sorry if our answer is not that sufficient lmao, <3 <3 <3

[dolliecworpse]

Aaaa I just discovered this blog and it's really interesting! I don't know too much about xenogenders/neopronouns since they kind of get me very overwhelmed due to my need to Absolutely understand everything and categorize/label stuff when I'm in a community (ex: fandoms, archetypes, tropes) so this might be a dumb question but.. what exactly are titles and what are they used for? And how should someone go about when making a gender-system? I'm asking because I plan on making one for a story and don't really know how to go about it.. anyways, so sorry for this dumb ask! I hope you're well and have a amazing day or night!!! Keep up the great work!!

there are no dumb questions here!! i’ll put the two explanations under the cut since it’z kinda long. sorri abt that! the gender systems i mention have alreadi been created, and i’ve linked them where i mention them if you wanna check them out!!

okk so titles are basicalli a name that describes someone or a certain aspect of them. does that make sense? it’s kinda like a name or pronouns in that they can give someone euphoria and they’re a way of describing a person. like a realli simple one that’z used outside the mogai communiti bc it’s an actual like position would be the prince!! more creative titles that aren’t used in day-to-day life might be “the creator of the heavens” or “(pronoun) who creates life.” these are more creative and descriptive than just a “job” title (i put in quotes bc i’m not sure if being a prince is considered a job LOL. but a more job-like one would be the baker). but yeah, they’re p much used as one would use a name or a pronoun, which is to address people.

as for gender systems, there are a few things that are considered sort of…gender system etiquette, shall we say?

1) think of the concept you want to convey. do you want a gender system where one’s gender is decorated with smth (genderdecorated)? or maybe one where one’s gender is related to certain fonts (genderfont)? then take that idea and turn it into a single word. most gender systems don’t have commonli seen gender endings like -ic or -gender, but just the word. am i making ani sense? i hope so 😅

2) take that word and put gender in front of it!! like with genderdecorated and genderfont. people will replace the word gender with the concept (or with genderfont it’z the font name) name of their choosing. like for example, if they want to coin a gender under the genderdecorated gender system where one’s gender is decorated in cuteness, it would be known as cutedecorated.

3) before we go ani further, check to see if the gender system alreadi exists!!!! look up gender_ in the tumblr search bar, and if nothing comes up, you’re probabli good to go!!

4) the next step is creating the flag template. try to make a unique flag template outside of just straight stripes, if possible. if you’re not sure how to do that, check out this quick tutorial here. if you have ani questions regarding this step, feel free to send in another ask!! below is the greyscale color palette i use for my templates. ik it looks boring, but people will use the template as a base and recolor it! this is commonli done w the bucket tool, but there’s probabli other methods. aniways, here’s the palette. simpli put an image layer into your canvas with this as an image and sample out the colors so that you can use them in your flag!!

ignore the colors above and below the greyscale line, i could onli crop it sm </3 keep in mind that you don’t need to use all of these colors in your template!!! they’re just there if you need them.

5) craft the definition, adding in blanks for people to fill in with the concept they want. for more info on what i mean, check out the coining posts to the gender systems i’ve mentioned above (dw, they’re linked!!) or check out any of my gender system coining posts, which can all be found linked in the pinned post of @bloodygendersystems !! sorri that i’m not great at explaining this part. it’z probabli just best to look at examples.

6) this part is optional, but it’z helpful for people who may want to coin under your gender system. upload your flag template(s) to deviantart!! when saving flag templates straight from tumblr, they get a bit blurri, making them harder to recolor. if this has ever happened to anibodi reading this, dw!! i got you. upload the flag you’ve saved from tumblr to this upscaler website, click the highest upscale option available to you, fill out the captcha, click download, and voilà! it should be readi for you to recolor!! ik the website name is kinda weird, but it’z upscale power is unmatched. i’ve also seen other people use it without issue so it should be good!!! i think it’z also an app, but i’ve onli ever used the website.

7) post your gender system!! if you plan on coining ani genders under your gender system, add the names of them into the post so people know not to coin those ones!! you could say smth like “planning to coin x, y, and z, so please don’t coin those unless i get overwhelmed and say you can.” some people might reblog with genders they’re going to coin as well, so make a mental note not to coin those ones.

i think that’z everithing? lmk if i’m forgetting ani important steps 😅

[syscurse]

Hey. Responding to your question on endogenic DID: I don't really agree that endogenic DID is a thing, but I've seen the arguments on it and can hopefully explain:

A lot of arguments on it boil down to "DID isn't a trauma disorder in the DSM, and it states that trauma is common, not required." Another argument is "brains are complicated and we don't understand how they work, if someone feels like their plurality is disordered they can describe themselves as a DID system"

I'm not going to comment on those as I want to present them without bias and let others come to their own conclusions on it, but I would like to quickly also add that honestly I don't think many endogenic systems agree with these sorts of arguments. From what I've seen, it's a very small vocal minority who argue this stuff

Thanks for your explanations! I agree that it doesn't seem like many endogenic systems agree with those arguments. It does seem to counter what the majority of the endogenic community has advocated for. I also agree it's more of a vocal minority... I was curious about why that minority had that stance, though.

Thank you for presenting the arguments without bias. I'll write down my thoughts on them here.

I can kinda get behind the "brains are complicated" argument but I think there comes a point where it turns unhealthy. Why self-identify with a disorder where the understood cause and treatment for it just does not fit your experience or help you? Like, I've been misdiagnosed before (not gonna say what it was). I did genuinely experience some of the symptoms associated with that disorder, but the main understanding, causes, and treatment behind it just did not vibe at all. I got some extra opinions and agreed that it was likely a misdiagnosis. My symptoms were better explained by something else.

But if I decided that it wasn't a misdiagnosis...and that centuries of research and lived experiences were likely wrong because "brains are complicated," I don't know where I would be. I'd probably have hurt a lot of people by spreading something like that. I'd probably have hurt myself a lot, too. I probably wouldn't have found a better answer for my experiences, either. So, I'm glad I didn't do that.

It just sounds like a scenario where I would be really unhappy and fighting people all the time.

As for the DSM argument, that one just irks me. I might be a bit more blunt here. Idk what I hate more, the DSM or syscoursers using it like its' a fucking weapon or gotcha. It's a diagnostic tool for trained clinicians, not your Mental Disorders 101 textbook.

"Trauma disorder" isn't a thing. The category is trauma-and-stressor-related. It's specifically only for disorders that have trauma in their diagnostic criteria. That trauma has to be identified and specifically fit what the DSM considers to be trauma, which does not include things like emotional abuse or having a life-threatening illness. The DSM's definition of trauma is often critiqued for being very limited.

DID is categorized as a dissociative disorder because that's the main symptom. Dissociation involves forgetting and often denying trauma. Emotional abuse and neglect is one of the most commonly reported experiences by people with DID, too. It would honestly be evil if "identified trauma" was put in the diagnostic criteria. No one should want that!!!

And what's funny to me is that this no one seems to realize that DID has been categorized as a stress-related disorder in the past, just not in the DSM.

I just feel like the people who are claiming such and such "because of the DSM" probably don't know what they're talking about...

- Sunflower

[fluxycock]

NSFT text under the post, because man have I missed being back on the RP site and seeing what people write in their custom kinklist.

cw for sexual language. a bit more on the nasty scale of things. i'm mesmerized by it.

so the site lets you have like. custom kinks with custom drop-down explanations, because they're nice like that. and I don't remember if it was all that common like... 3-4 years ago when i started using the site to use like. fuckspeak. hentai-lingo. like, people did, but those were few and far inbetween, and kinda just limited to A Certain Subset Of People

nowadays, everyone and their mom uses 'em. lemme categorize:

still pretty normal

dungeon degeneracy

IQ-draining musk

utter mindbreakage

bareback breeding

bitchification

this is still pretty fine. this is like, stuff i could reasonably find on pornsites, or at least in some AO3 tags.

now what the hell do you mean by that

glrk-glrk-glrkjobs

audible arousal

stacked slambait

lipglue kisspaint

understanding presses against the front of my brain. i don't think i should comprehend.

ok this is just nasty

bullnut slathering

dense ballglue

hot holefrenching

gaped cumfarts

sowtit paizuri

and in this category we have stuff where i'm left sitting and just. man. there are some specific-ass subsections of his website that i don't dip my toes into. i'm glad they're having fun. sitting side by side with them is kinda weird but i'm sure they feel the same about me, considering that i, uh.

i cater to a very different market.

[mentalisttraceur]

re: karen

https://fakepontchartrain.tumblr.com/post/672213380646502400

This Ask is from a few months ago now. I never really knew what to do with this, or what specific thing involving "Karen" this was "re".

So that link goes to a text post which says

it's not a coincidence that "Karen" and "MILF" have gained popularity at the same time, this is the new dichotomy for middle-aged women. in a pornified culture there are only two categories for women: women who deserve hatred and fuckable women

and a reblog reply which says

it's worth mentioning that those two categories often intersect because men view sex as a punishment for women they hate.

I assume you wanted my thoughts on this?

These feel like "fisheye lens takes" - overinflating/magnifying one aspect to fill most of the view in a distorted way, as if that's all there is to it or the rest can simply be ignored.

Porn is kinda like high fructose corn syrup or addictive video games - works by hitting rewards in some brains at levels of intensity or easy availability that would not normally naturally happen, so most brains are not built to handle them. So it can be part or primary cause of a problem, but only because it's leveraging stuff already in human brains. In a species with sexual reproduction, categorizing others based on how fuckable they are is going to be natural - not always so directly or consciously or absolutely of course, but in a sense that's what feelings of romantic or sexual attraction are: a good enough score along some dimensions which are relevant to fuckability, translated into something that your conscious mind feels, usually in a motivating way.

So that dichotomy was always there, but the opposite of "fuckable" in most men's minds wasn't and still isn't "deserve hatred", but rather just "not fuckable". It's just that some men are hateful to women unless "fuckable" flips a switch in their mind, and some other men are simps who can't hate women they find fuckable because they're too busy idealizing them, and so on.

Also I'm pretty sure "MILF" predates "Karen" by like a decade or maybe even two. I remember the first Karen memes popping up when I was already on Tumblr, in my early twenties. I'm pretty sure I remember MILF being a category on porn sites when I was first furtively using the internet to find porn when I was like... thirteen.

Similarly, sex as punishment is definitely a thing that some men do/fantasize/believe (and some women too). But like, it's pretty salient here that the most common complaint from the rare women that deliberately "rape-bait" is that most men will respond to persistent and severe provocation not by punitively raping but by just leaving the situation. Meanwhile there's another simple way for these categories to intersect: hatred does not preclude sexual attraction for many people - people can hate someone and still find them very fuckable, and some of those people end up reaching for punishment as a rationalization.

So like... those statements touch on truths which are part of a larger whole, and in some situations they'll even lead to the right conclusions, but if you use them as your sole explanation/model you'll be wrong too badly, too often.

[yomiurinikei]

for system pride day,, u could write nikei being a system hcs,, also happy system pride day!! - from another system who really likes your stuff ^^

WAAA sorry this is so late i kept forgetting but hi i was genuinely so excited to get this i hope ur still following me/will see this if u weren't following to begin with!!!! happy (late) system pride to u too, i'm so glad u enjoy!!! (sorry if these aren't too cohesive, they were written in two big bouts after a big break inbetween, i hope it's not too obvious!)

edit: anywyas i'm working on compiling proof that every sdra character is part of a system /hj

~*~syskei hcs!

•ooooo okay hi. i was thinking abt different alters + their functions and i think i have some stuff? some ideas? to counter linujs inconsistencies with nikeis motivations. yes

•so! the reason we never learn nikeis backstory (in game explanation) is because the main fronter doesn't know anything! he has zero fucking clue what his childhood was,,, he vaguely remembers what utsuro saved him from, but frequently struggles with impostor syndrome

•becauseee unlike the other children of utsuro, he only vaguely remembers some big things, specific incidents when he got hurt, not "the big traumatic event"

•and he only realized he had did when the other children of utsuro worked it out with him, after a alter was triggered to front and had a meltdown.

•when nikei didn't remember it, and revealed that he's not even certain he didn't make up being saved by utsuro, they did some research on what could be happening!

•aaand they've worked out that: there's nikei, main fronter, with the personality we see in chapter 1, and then some control issues + need to feel in power, but a lot of insecurity, and again, imposter syndrome

•then, there's the alter we'd see in chapter 4, a protector who's main form of protecting is to take control over everything, feeling the need to manipulate everyone so that way they know no one will try and hurt them

•and! theresss at least one child alter, but nikei thinks there's a few more from different stages in his life

•he's only really identified the one child alter who split off to hold the traumatic memories of his backstory because. that's the only one the other children of utsuro have really noticed, and was the one mentioned earlier

•speaking of!! his being a system is vv covert. as a child, it was always all about following orders (lack of control) and so the system is used to just "okay. here's what we're gonna do, we're gonna get it done, and not cause issues"

•anywayssss just gonna focus on nikei? but yea! them,,

•feels guilty sometimes because like "what if i'm faking and just trying to find a way out of taking responsibility for my actions" but then three seconds later he's desperately apologizing to someone for a snarky comment while throttling an alter

•every now and then has a "holy shit that's a system thing" moment for a behavior and his world is rocked

•tried to categorize who's in front and stuff by mannerisms to help him when he's blurring and stuff. it didn't go well, he's made 20 iterations of the categories

•for him, the worst thing is decorating. that's when he's hit with tons of conflicting opinions from the others as they all talk about what they want for their room, etc etc

•!! emma heard about a director planning to make a film with DID, nikei was brought on as a consultant to help with how the system was written!

•nikei will forget to do a chore or just. not want to and he'll drag a different alter to front so they'll do it, or will switch with a kid in the system bc no ones willing to get after a kid

•oh speaking of all the CoU are kinda enamored with the kids of his system because 1) they care abt nikei and that extends to the rest of the system 2) i generally see them. while not trusting themselves to care for kids, wanting the best for children they come across and being protective?

•so they've apologized like crazy bc they feel bad abt how they reacted when previously mentioned syskid was pulled to front (a lot of "calm down, don't act so childish") despite nikei making it clear everything's okay ajsjsjsjsj

•in killing game, they're all just. quietly panicking and wondering if it's safer for nikei to talk abt being part of a system or for him to keep it quiet

•nikei is just trying to keep everyone else quiet and keep them from going to squeal over whichever of the participants they're excited to meet. help him

•!!! he likes his hair how it is, and is rlly glad that everyone agreed to keep it like that, but he hates coming to front and it being tied up

•speaking of,  his hat is kinda his signature item? if the others see him with it, it's generally a guarantee nikei is fronting, or was fronting recently

•when uh. we saw him in game without his hat, it's because he panicked so much that a switch happened and so the hat was ditched

[smartcookie727]

Tell us more about your ships and why do you ship those... both my hero academia and ft cus I'm looking for more ships to fill my life

Sure thing! Let’s start with FTcause bnha has soooo many characters and is a hodgepodge of ships.

Fairy Tail:

Gajevy -My true OTP. They are the halves that make each other whole. Both are greatcharacters on their own but together they make each other better. Levy isanalytical and shy with the intellect and work ethic beyond anyone else. Gajeelknows how to get the job done; he is fiercely protective and very in touch withhis emotions. He doesn’t care what others think of his attitude, and to him actionsmean more than words. Both could be classified as people who like to work aloneyet they both have small teams (Shadow gear and pantherlily / dragonslayers).Levy is the planning to Gajeel’s punch and Gajeel is the confidence behind Levy’swords. I love their dynamic so much. They have gone through pain, recovery,trust, friendship, and love. There is so much to explore with both of theircharacters and life in general. The flirty banter is strong with these two.They fall into the “world melts away” relationship. They sometimes don’trealize how obviously in love they are because neither is good at hidingemotions, and both are direct, passionate people with their feelings. Levy andGajeel push each other just enough to foster growth without crossing the lineof fighting all the time. In a word they are balanced. I can’t see them withothers because they make for the most supportive, balanced pair long term.

Nalu - Whata dynamic and friendship! These two have a great connection and trust in eachother. They are playful but caring with corny innuendos sprinkled in. They makesense. They have moved from friends to partners who have saved each othersasses enough times for them to think…why do I run headfirst into danger foryou. I find them interesting since they have a different dynamic than my otherdragonslayer/bookworm duo. There are threads of similarity but they have adifferent core bond. They are a couple that shows that love can grow andchange, relationships develop at different speeds and love doesn’t have to be asudden burst where you just know.

Jerza -Being a leader is a lonely job. These two are really interesting to me. Theyare the stoic captains that put everyone before themselves. Erza cares deeplyabout her guild and puts the weight of everyone’s happiness above her own. Shemade what she believes to be a selfish decision long ago that defined her andhas been trying to make up for it since. Jellal is similar. He made terriblechoices he is unwilling to forgive. Neither believes they deserve the love andaffection they desire. There is a constant inner turmoil is fun to play with.Head vs heart. I believe these two are each others’ home. No one understandsthe pressure they feel like the other can. When they can be together the wallscome down and both can enjoy the simple things they normally give up. Together,neither has to be the person people will turn to for help or guidance, they canjust be themselves. Let your hair down Erza, you deserve love andrelaxation.   

Bixanna -Mischief making matchmakers! I love these two. They both are the cutewisecrackers of their respective groups. Bickslow has this gruff edge, keepcalm and kick ass side, and totally dorky jokes. He’s not afraid to get sillyand gives zero fucks. Lisanna is the total support he needs to be himself.Wanna be silly and go play pranks? Lis can keep up. Wanna go fight monsters?Lis can keep up and look cute doing it. Wanna chill on the couch and thinkabout how strong of a bond your team has? Lis does too. They work well in thesense of balance too. Lisanna tends to be the person that is quietly friendswith everyone but is close with a select few. Bickslow brings her out of hershell. She’s had a strange distance since returning to the guild and primarilyhangs with fam…I think that those years people thought she was dead made herreturn bittersweet. They tried to move on as best they could and she got leftbehind. When she gets back it’s hard to find her place. Her old dynamics havechanged…the bond is still there but things aren’t the same. Theirrelationship isn’t built in the past or defined by her return. They are peoplewho found each other unexpectedly…one of those relationships that suddenlyhappened when neither was looking for it. I think I’d categorize them ashope and future. Both have had dark times that may haunt them occasionally, butthey give each other a clean slate and zero judgment. 

Merelow -My official crack babies. I was randomly thinking one day and this ship fellinto my lap! Bickslow: badass jokester. Meredy: badass bubblegum girl. Put emtogether and magic. These two are ready to try anything and everything. Theybring out the adventurous spontaneity in each other. Both have been on thewrong side of the fight and have moved forward. They have a core team thatmeans the world to them and are supremely loyal to each other. These two aresimilar to the bixanna dynamic with more of a wanderer side thrown in. They’vehad their breakdowns and have forgiven themselves and grown. They both give somuch love and cheer to their friends. I also love how compatible their magicis. Soul control and soul link. These two aren’t afraid to fight and cry andlove and sing. Neither tries to hide anything from the other. They are socomfortable together and they truly understand each other. They make everyeffort so that the other will smile, and I just love them.

Sildarts -OK. so. @gsut​ and @sanguine-fairy got me on this ship. Grumpy kickass dudes withgrumpy kids. They’ve been through many hardships in life and have loved andcried and have so much more life behind them than most of my other ships. They havea deeper connection by their love for their kids and their strain to have alife of their own. These two experienced individuals kinda trip over themselveslike teens as they explore a new side of themselves in this relationship. Noone knows how it’s supposed to go. Silver has many of the qualities I admire in Gray and kindareigns in Gildarts’ craziness. Gildarts gives him balance. He throws stoicSilver and all caution to the wind and make them both laugh and fill the piecesof their hearts that have been empty. Also these men know how to brood and beangry and glum…they have held in their emotions so much that both understandthe subtle cues when the other is upset…though it doesn’t always stop somepretty intense fights. They are passionate guys that hold each other up whenlife tries to punch them in the gut. 

Lyredy - Two sweet, sensitive cuties. These two are harmony. Lyon is hella romantic and is always doing things both large and smallto show how much he cares for her. Meredy can see through the bravado he putson to the core person he is. She helps Lyon not to take himself too seriouslyand he always makes her laugh and smile. Meredy has insecurities about her pastand Lyon understands this himself. He will be as over the top as her can or asdown to earth as he needs to make her feel better. Both talk big about love butfind themselves remarkably shy when it actually happens. They are a mix ofadventure and shyness and pull each other along to find new things to love.They are a softer romance and I adore them.

Gruvia - Pushing through barriers these two truly stumbledinto romance. She could see his walls from the start and has felt the pain ofbuilding them herself, but Gray showed her such kindness that she truly felt achange. Gray and Juvia are elements that shape each other, pushing each otherto grow without necessarily trying. They became friends who feel a strong senseof responsibility to each other. Time turned friendship to love and I enjoy theway they play with the intensity of their romance. At times they are soft andsweet and others they are hot and heavy. She gives him a place to be candidwith his emotions and he reigns in her dramatic side. At their cores they carefor each other deeply and rely on their mutual support more than they realize.They will always drift back to each other, even when things tough.

Miraxus/Laxana/Canajane/Fraxus - idk why but I love them ALL. Miraxus is so cute andfun. They both have a calm and wild side. They are the heads of theirrespective groups and take things very seriously. When they’re together theycan let their hair down. Laxus sees through the smile she always wears down tothe fragile person she can be. Laxus is so stoic and Mira can always tell whathe’s thinking. They are more reserved as a couple and just enjoy each other’scompany. Laxana is fun and flirty. They rile each other up and don’t let thefun stop. They can laugh at anything and take great fun in jokes and quips witheach other. Always exploring and having an adventure with these two! Canajane.Talk about flirty cuteness and innuendos. They truly care about each other andCana is always pushing Mira to try new things. Mira keeps Cana grounded andwill always support and carry her. Fraxus. Mutual love and support. They aren’tfond of pda but the love can always be seen in their eyes. These two trulyhave each other’s back and always understand what each other needs.

Anyone else…I enjoy mymultishipping (aside from gajevy) so if there’s another couple that I canreally understand I’ll probably enjoy them: Chendy, LaLu, GrayLu, Alzack/Bisca,Stinerva, Minerza, Freed/Rufus, ships with Juvia, peeps from Mermaid Heel, etc.The only problem I have is if I can’t understand the relationshipdynamic…then things just fizzle in my mind.

Hahahaha now onto BNHA! OK I’mkinda tired from FT so I’ll keep these explanations less elaborate

BNHA:

Todomomo - insecure strong kids that lift each other up andbelieve in each other. Momo is such an interesting character and I love her.

Kacchako - fight like a girl. He respects her and she respectshim. They push each other to be better and I just love a cinnamon roll with agrumpy boy

Iihatsu - who better for a machine inventing girl than the guywith the engine built right in? she’s not afraid of anything and helps iida letloose. He’s always there to try her new inventions and she always makes himsmile.

Fuyusei, Bakumomo, Bakushima - love them all and they totally make sense

KiriMina, Jiro/Kaminari - such cute kids

Momo/Iida, Ochako/Iida,Ochako/Deku, Hakagure/Ojiro - cute potential and they have moments that make me smile