#but brightside this might help me not feel so tired anymore

[ahauntedcowboy]

i've had plenty of health problems in the past but for some reason having to get on heart medicine days before turning 28 is just...hitting harder....hm.

[blissfulalchemist]

“I locked the keys in the car.” CatRaf 😘

Jo! This was very fun as it is early stages of their relationship so please enjoy. 

There was nothing Cat hated more than having an early morning after a late night. It should always be one or the other. It shouldn’t have even been her making this drive either, but someone just had to have a full night with their resistance boy toy. John was just lucky she knew how to keep her mouth shut and feign ignorance to his exploits. Not that anyone cared about what she knew or thought about things anyway. She didn’t even want to go to whatever performative service was to be held on in the Whitetails, but someone had to. 

Having to attend the night service already was leaving a bitter taste for the whole situation. “‘Oh I just don’t feel very good’ he says. ‘I think I ate something that didn’t agree with me’,” Cat mocked as she drove down the long stretch of road, “‘Just go without me. Take my place please. Be a good little wife.’ Maybe you should be a good little husband and not sleep around with the damn deputy.” She rolled her eyes letting out a slow breath, “I shouldn’t be upset. I know I should tell him that I know. Should tell Wes...maybe make life a little easier for him. Are we even at that, like, friendship level?” Does he even consider me a friend? Was almost three months enough time to become friends? “I’m just overthinking this. It’s just safer to not know. Turn a blind eye, play the fifties housewife in this situation.” 

She was just tired, just needed to get some sleep. The only brightside to this debacle was that she was never expected to stay at the vetran’s center, she could stay at a smaller cabin no one cared to know about. When was the last time she went to it at night though? The road wasn’t looking familiar anymore, did she miss the turn? The car strayed as she tried to look for something to give a clue as to where she was. The groves in the center of the road startled her, jerking the car back into place. Her lights casted shadows, appearing to be a deer in her tired eyes. She once again moved the car suddenly, the front tire kicking up a broken beer bottle. The sharp edge hitting the back tire. The sudden feeling of the car becoming off balance made Catlina hit the brakes pulling over to the side of the road. 

“What the fuck!” Her heart raced as she put the car in park resting her head against the steering wheel. She turned the radio down focusing on her breathing trying to calm herself from reaching panic levels. It was just a rock or something. It’s not that bad surely, she thought feeling her pulse slow down. She shut the car off leaving the keys in the ignition loosely, as she stepped out, her fingers brushing over the locking button on the door. The beeping of the car filling the silence of the mountain road as she left the door open. 

The light above her did little to show what the damage may have been and the beeping was starting to get to her. The already grating sound was piercing her ears as she went to grab the phone to use the flashlight on it. She growled as she pulled the keys out, putting an end to the sound they created. She took a deep breath looking at the back left tire, the rubber deflated. “Fuck,” she said under breath. She’d need to change the tire but the tools needed to do so had been taken out of the trunk to make room for some boxes the other day. 

She looked up to the sky, “I know you hate me but did you really have to do this to me?” She sighed going to sit in the driver’s seat, scrolling through the few contacts she had. John was out, same with Wes, his willingness to help her still up in the air, Lance was also indisposed at the moment per Jacob’s orders. She wasn’t going to call Jacob either, didn’t want to hear what he had to say about her driving. Her finger lingered over the only other number that could help her out, Rafael. The question of whether three months was enough time for people to become friends passed through her mind again. When they’d hang out Wes was always there, never alone, and he was nice enough, though Catlina had low hopes of him coming to help her out. They didn’t seem to be at that friendship level yet.

Not only that she was awkward enough around him with other people around, being alone with him? The image scared her. It’s not like he was someone that would be interested in her like that anyway, this was a one sided school girl crush and that was fine. They were friends….she….she called him a friend. He was probably busy anyway, With what exactly, Cat? “Resistance things. Honing his skills,” she leaned back in the seat, “Some other person he had his eye on.” 

She groaned, the idea of that was stupid in this county at the current moment. It was simple, all she had to do was call and ask. Worse he could say was no, you’re shit out of luck. Try not to die out there by yourself. He wouldn’t say that, “Fine yeah he wouldn’t but the worse he could say was no.” She looked back to the screen, “Fuck it.” She pushed the name calling him, it rang twice before she hung up tossing the phone to the seat next to her. Her heart was racing, all she had to do was call him. She picked up the phone, swallowing the anxiety building in her chest, pushing the name once more, “He might not even answer.” Two rings, “That would be the best thing to happen,” Be a damn miracle. Three rings and she felt the car start to close in, “Please go to voicemail,” she pleaded as the fourth ring moved into the fifth. She was calming down as it appeared that he-.

“Hello,” Cat gasped, resisting the urge to hang up the phone at the sound of his voice. 

She needed his help, Worse he could say was no, “Hey. Raf. Uh. How are you? Or um I mean are you- are you busy at all?” She placed the phone delicately along the wheel leaving the speaker on, twisting the tips of her fingers. 

“No,” he started off curious, “Why? Did you finally burn the kitchen down?” He laughed, This was a bad idea.

Cat scoffed at the notion, “No,” she mocked, “How dare you assume otherwise good sir.”

“Then, to what do I owe the pleasure of your call, Conejito?” 

She took a breath, “I kind of sort of have a little tiny bit of car trouble,” she closed her eyes, resigned, “My tire popped and I don’t have what I need to fix it. If you can’t or don’t want to it’s okay. You don’t have to worry about it. I just.” She bit her lower lip, I just didn’t have anyone else to really call.

“Sure,” What, “Just tell me where you’re at.” She looked at the phone wide eyed, Did he just agree to help me? “Conejito,” he called out, “you okay?”

She blinked a few times, clearing her throat, “Right. Right, sorry I’m here. What did you say?”

His laugh filled her car putting a smile on her face, “I need you to tell me where you’re at so I can help you.”

“Are you sure? You really don’t have to.”

“I’m sure. I can’t have my only competition go out like this,” she laughed shaking her head, “It’s going to be me that takes you down. Now just tell me where you’re at.”

She nodded, “Well I know I’m on that main highway road that takes you up towards that big lake in the Whitetails. Like the really big one, that’s on the,” she moved her hands clockwise, “Never eat sour watermelons,” she mumbled, “The one that’s on the West side. Yeah cause I came through the South Entrance.”

“Okay I think I know the road you’re talking about. Do you mean Snowshoe Lake?”

“I think so,” she shrugged. She’d been here almost a year and still had trouble with the names.

She heard Raf sigh on the phone, “Okay let’s try this. Do you see a mile marker near you?”

She peered out the window looking for the small green sign, “Hey question what if-,” she smiled seeing one not that far in front of her, “Oh never mind I see one. Hold on I can’t see what it says though.” Cat got out of the car, pushing the lock button on the door, walking closer to the sign, “It says sixteen point five.”

“That’s perfect I know exactly where you’re at,” she heard some rustling on the line, “Just hang tight I’ll be there in about twenty minutes.”

Cat crossed her arms, turning to face the car again, “Thank you Raf.”

“Of course, what are friends for,” he hung up after that, and Cat felt the blush running up her cheeks. 

“He said we were friends,” she hummed walking back to the car. She rubbed her upper arms before reaching for the handle of the door. She pulled, stumbling as the door didn’t give. She tried again, the door unyielding, she patted her pants looking for the keys. Oh fuck, she looked into the car shining the flashlight through the window. There in the cup holder were the keys, she rested her forehead against the car. She thought back to the events trying to figure out how she could have locked the keys away. She was distracted, on the phone with Raf, and she shut the door, her hand must have hit the lock button on instinct. She always locked the door if she was going farther than a gas pump, never wanted to run the risk of someone stealing her car or sneaking in to harm her.

“Fuck me,” she whispered. Sighing she found a place to sit on the side of the road, grabbing a branch. “Only twenty minutes. That’s all. Just wait twenty minutes.”

She leaned against the car trying to keep her eyes open, reciting song lyrics, Pokemon names, facts about her friend’s Dungeons and Dragons characters. Anything to keep her mind occupied as she waited in the dark. He said we were friends, she repeated once she ran out of things to recite. The slamming of a car door had her jumping to her feet, stick outstretched. She couldn’t make out his features with the headlights behind him, blinding her. “Woah there,” Raf’s voice said, his hands raised with a smile on his face, “It’s just me, Conejito.”

“Oh,” she tossed the branch to the side, “Sorry. You scared me.”

She walked closer to him, “Why aren’t you sitting in the car?” His head tilted, noticing her shivering.

She looked down, “Yeah, about that,” twisting the tips of her fingers, “I locked the keys in the car by accident.” She looked up giving him a shy smile, “Sorry. I can get them out if you have a slim jim on you.”

He chuckled, shaking his head, “You know how to unlock a car but not change a tire?”

“Hey I never said I couldn’t change a tire,” she argued crossing her arms, “I just said I didn’t have the tools to do so.”

He made his way to the bed of the truck, Cat following him, “Well locking the keys in the car Conejito is not ideal.” He checked the chains and machinery in it, “Thankfully for you I brought a tow truck.”

She watched him keeping her arms crossed, “Why do you own a tow truck?”

“I don’t,” he shrugged his jacket off handing it to her, “I borrowed it just in case you had to go far.” 

Cat stared at the jacket not moving, “Right you can’t drive more than a certain number of miles on it.”

He nodded, handing the jacket over to her once again, “Here.” When she didn’t take it he placed it over her shoulders, “It’s cold out here,” he went back to setting things up, “The rough roads up here don’t help either with them.”

She put her arms through the sleeves, swimming in the jacket, “So where are we going to go?”

“Home I assume,” he gave a curt nod to the work stepping into the driver’s seat, “Let me pull up in front of you.” 

Cat stepped back trying to think of where to go, from what he said the cabin was a no go and there was no way he could take her to any of the other places she had in mind without Raf getting hurt in the process. Raf got to work on hooking up the small sedan to the tow, Cat walked up to watch him, “I can’t go home.” He looked up at her confused, “There’s some stupid public appearance thing and I have to take John’s place. I was up here so I didn’t have to wake up as early to get there on time.”

“I can take you somewhere else then.”

“And risk getting a bullet no thanks,” she paused, “Well risk you getting a bullet I mean.”

He ran a hand through his curls, “Sounds like you’re saying you’d take a bullet for me.”

She shifted avoiding his eyes, “I’d try to. Doesn’t mean it would happen but you know.”

“Thank you,” she met his warm eyes returning the smile he wore. “Okay. Got her all set up. Go ahead and get in the truck.” Cat nodded, jumping in watching as he fully got her car set up, eyes following him as he moved around. She pulled the coat closer over her, its warmth relaxing her. The smell of his cologne mixing with the leather of his coat felt familiar and intoxicating, her head spinning as she tried to commit it to memory with her sleep deprived brain. She jumped with Rafael jumping into the car, “Okay. I know where to take you, because I’m pretty sure I know where you have to be tomorrow.” She nodded, leaning her head against the window. 

The drive felt short as the two tried to sing and recite lines to poems, anything to fill the void of silence from the lack of good radio stations. Cat was yawning by the time they approached the small cabin. “What is this place?”

“Home sweet home,” he declared, his eyes taking in her state once the truck was in park. “You should head inside and get some sleep.”

She shook her head, eyes half open, “I’ll be fine. Besides I got to help ya. Least I can do for your kindness.”

He was quick in making it to her side of the truck opening the door, “I got it don’t worry.” He held his hand out to her, “Come on. Let’s get you inside,” she tried to shake her head no again, “You know I could carry you in there if I wanted to right?”

“That’s not fair and you know it,” she mumbled. Cat took Raf’s hand as he helped her down from the truck. He led her inside, the cabin all one room, save for the bathroom that had a door, and filled with bare bones furniture. A table, some chairs, night stand, old wood stove, and a queen sized bed pushed into a corner. “No wonder you’re at Wes’ all the time,” she mused looking around, “Wait. Where are you going to sleep? There’s only a bed in here. No couch.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he told her, pushing her lightly towards the bed.

“No,” she moved in front of him, hands on her hips, “I don’t want you sleeping on the floor. It’s not fair.”

“I won’t sleep on the floor,” she stared him down, until he finally rolled his eyes, “You sleep first while I change the tire, then we can decide on what to do. Deal?”

“You promise?” He drew an X over his heart. She still didn’t like the idea but at least she’d be able to sleep in her car once he woke her up. “Okay. I get some sleep and then you wake me so you can have your bed.” He nodded, helping her into the bed tucking her in. “You better keep your promise Rafael or else you’re gonna pay for it later,” she mumbled, her eyelids closing, his light laugh the last thing she heard. 

Her eyes fluttered open to the light blue morning, the clock on Raf’s nightstand reading five fifteen in the morning. Cat shot up in bed, looking around the cabin for Raf, it couldn’t have taken him all night to get her car in order. She turned to look behind her in the bed spotting his sleeping form. He had a different blanket on him, Cat noticing that he slept over the covers of the bed. He lied to her about waking her up but still kept his promise to not sleep on the floor.

She sighed pulling the jacket she still wore closer to her, her car keys on the nightstand. Maybe it was too cold for him to allow her to sleep somewhere else, he was just being nice, the blanket situation proved that. She stood quietly taking the jacket off a shiver running up her spine, “Stop projecting, Cat,” she whispered, “it’s not that deep,” she laid the jacket next to him, “It never will be.” She gave a smirk shaking her head, grabbing the keys and making her way out the door as quietly as she could to not wake him. He said I was his friend and that’s enough.

[pinktatertots99]

consultations with yourself - amnesia fic.

some minor idea I got an character thing I got into. thanks to me friendo @iiconfettii and i's au on ura becoming a separate entity from ukyo after the events of amnesia. (memories that is. I uh, haven't seen the others. ...or played em but y'know. after the whole series i mean.) also in this their all in a relationship for anyone curious.

slowly he could feel his eyes open and look around the room, confused at first until he remembered where he was at. reaching a hand out to see it and it's manicured to perfection nails. rubbing his eyes he looked up and around the room. bookcase, desk, all organized nicely compared to the dirty and chaotically unorganized room ukyo had.

...ah that's right. it took ura a second to realize, that's right, he was here. but not where he used to be.

it's been a while since he and that crybaby were attached. a good few months or so he knows. that weird institute's splitting device, just what kid can make that?! well, guess either way this was nice for one of the two.

...not him obviously. in fact he had to sit and wonder just why was he separated huh? besides to give ukyo a break from having to deal with someone else living in his brain, just what was the point of making HIM sentient huh? what did he ever do to be brought into this world? kill the love of his, ukyo's, and the other's life? and then having to just off himself just to keep things even in that world? world bouncing over and over cause the dumbass was never satisfied but accepted it!

infact why even still be here!? he was warped by said idiot's constant world jumping and was the shield of almost all of those crummy disasters, the slaughters, some of their own suicides just to move on! not to mention, the lust was still there in him. tamed a bit but, something still lulled him to the sharp edges of a knife. and honestly, what could stop him?

so many things were unfair though for him. his existence only stemming from so much emotional and mental trauma, and this appearance. he still looked like him but he wasn't. least one Brightside his eyes took a more orange and red look compared to the others big greens but that was barely much of a difference. talk about ironic considering he couldn't stand being apart of him but at the same time he could never distance himself from him. having to look like a twin of him though...he couldn't live with it but he also couldn't live without it.

he had no memories of his own. just vague ones he remembered of ukyo's past but that was his past. his real first memory was waking up infront of a horrified face of their love of their life before he slaughtered her...all he could do was laugh. laugh his first introduction to life off. laugh off the intense feeling and the pain coming from his stomach using the same knife even when the world was disappearing.

...how funny in a sick way he thought. he wanted to end it when it first started. ...he knew from then his hands would never be clean. no matter how much the others now are trying to pull him in, it just feels too much like their doing it to put the past behind them. change him 'for the better' and just forget. as if they all have a case of amnesia themselves.

...if only though, if only they, himself, and everyone could forget that. he knows though, their all suffering the brutal memories of what all those universes serviced, but despite it, he still felt the worst of remembering all of those and more. not a single good memory came of it...

"uhm, u-" ura perked up as he saw familiar hazel eyes and brown hair looking around the room then at him. "oh! ura."

he stared back at her and smirked. "heh, disappointed I'm not string bean? eh I guess I can't blame you." he joked off as she walked in. "actually your the exact person I wanted to see." she stated as she closed the door, gaining ura's interest. "oh? finally got tired of the other green haired maniac?"

she giggled. "your silly eheh. but no I just wanted to talk." she stated as she sat on the mattress ura was still sitting on. "wanted to check in and see how you were doing. so, how are you?"

ura just peered eye to eye with her before looking off. "...whatever it wants to be I guess." he mumbled gaining a confused eyebrow arch from the other. "what does that mean?"

“...nothing. it’s fine.”

“i don’t think it is. please tell me.” he looked away from her gaze. she could feel it was something more.

“...does it matter?”

“it always does to me.”

he held his legs in his arms. “don’t fret yourself over such small things. worry about more pressing matters.”

he could feel her moving closer, hands finding his cheeks and making him look up. “and i am. your one of them.”

staring into eachother’s eyes ura sighed. “nothing gets by you. you persistent girl.” he stated, putting a hand over one of hers, holding it gently with such disgusting hands.

“it’s stupid, and a waste of time but...i...just really hate this look.” he confirmed. somewhat on the right track. she looked at him, seeming to see it wasn’t just that but not pressing further. petting one of his bangs lightly. “because you look so similar to uki, right?”

he swallowed down a mix of a scoff and chuckle at that nickname. “some of that. ...i never...does this really matter?”

“to me yes.”

he sighed. “i tried. well, to put it lightly, it’s too much of...a reminder.”

“...i think i understand.”

“do you? or is that the therapist inside talking?”

she sighed. “we’ve both been through what happened before. in different ways but, i get some of it. i never said ‘i understand’ like i have been through it. i just think i know what your inferring. but please, if you need to, tell me cause maybe i don’t.”

he took both of her hands still on his cheeks, slowly sliding them off but not letting go, staring into her eyes. “when you look at me, do you see that ukyo guy? do you see me? or do you see the ingrained picture of all the times i’ve ended your life?”

silence stood between them. “...i see the last two.”

“does it terrify you?”

“not anymore.”

he arched a brow, hands gripping hers tighter. “why not?”

her eyes gave off a sad feeling washing through them. “because, despite what happened. all those times, i don’t hold any malice at you.” she snaked her hands out of his hold and hugged around his shoulders, still looking in his eyes. “because i know, you loved me. and it hurt. hurt to know how much you also went through to save me. to spare ukyo from the horrors. i could never be more grateful then now or ever.” she petted a tear that went unnoticed from his cheek. “and i couldn’t love you more than how i do now. and i couldn’t feel more sorry then how i feel now.” he could see the similar clear streams falling from her cheeks. “despite what happened, i know you meant every good intention. i can’t take it back, or forget, or even know how to repay it. but, i’ll do my best.”

he continued staring back at her, hands brushing under her eyes. “you can start by stopping this.” he stated, gesturing to her tears. “they look too sad on such a beautiful girl like you.” she gave off a light laugh as she brushed her eyes. “i’m sorry.”

“and don’t be apologetic. you didn’t do anything.”

“well, either way, i still want to help you. if there’s any way i can.” he poked at a bang as she said that. “wouldn’t suppose you know anything bout changing your appearance right?”

“well, i know some but mine might be better at that.” she stated, taking his long braid into her hands. “so you want to look a little less like ukyo hm?”

“ironically enough though, not much.” he stated. “this look, i hate it but it’d feel too...weird leaving it. if that makes any sense.”

“hmmm,” she hummed. “would you want to dye it anything? or maybe cut it?”

he groaned somewhat unsure. “maybe cut. these stupid bangs keep getting in my face. the braid though, maybe just to a manageable length but otherwise keep it a little long.”

“i think we can manage that.” she said positively. “what about hair dyeing?”

“bit hard to find things that mix well with green isn’t it? gotta also fit nicely cause honestly i can’t stand the idea of whatever horribly mis-matched colors clashing together.”

“your definitely more organized and precise huh?” she giggled lightly. he blushed. “well, just better that way. afterall living with that litterbug can get on your nerves just a little.” she giggled more, definitely understanding where he was coming from. he felt a sincere smirk forming from that. despite not everything being resolved, this was enough to help him into a better mood. she was enough to help. it felt...so warm, and sweet. ...maybe there was a bit of a bright side for being brought here.

[jocy-diaries]

02.04.2022

I’m very tired. I’m doing badly at concentrating on work since I have so much homework to get done. And then there’s so much to get done it doesn’t feel like I’m getting anywhere. I have a meeting with Brightside today to discuss my medication. It’s been making me so sleepy and it’s awful, but I’m sure I wouldn’t mind if I didn’t have so much catch up to do. I’m glad we have check ins but I swear if I have to pay $75 for a four minute catch up I’m gonna yell.

I can’t focus on work because I want to focus on school but I can’t focus on school because I’ve got to focus on work (≖͞_≖̥) Pain.

Aww I just had the call with the recruiter and he was so nice! I think he’s playing DnD with friends over the weekend which is so sweet~ Am I tired of DAM positions? Sure. But I’m pretty good at them, and getting a position where I can be more in charge and focus on one thing that isn’t all over the place might help me enjoy it more. Still hoping it stays a contract position, but yeah, sounds good. Except if they want to hire me anytime earlier than August. I forgot to ask about that… I really lucked out with my first real job. It set me up well for all of this. …That position is for a lot of money though. I was like “Let me say this high number” and he just plain said I would be getting more than that. Bruh. What are they gonna have me do? Everyday it’s like ‘Surely this job isn’t worth that much money’ and yet. If only I could enjoy these kind of positions and stop searching for archives. Ugh I need to update my resume. Not in a ‘the information is wrong’ way, just in a ‘it could be cuter’ way.

I can’t do this. Having people think I’m good. It’s taxing. Sometimes I realize that I’m legit alive for only this one life and it’s like. Gross. Gotta do something about that. I forget about my own mortality way too often for it to be comfortable. My world is all about me and yet I go without it so often.

Anyways, DnD tonight~ Now that I know the wonders of playing in a small group I’m not as excited for the Friday sessions anymore, but I’m still going for practice. Okay! DnD was fun actually, even with a large group~ I think I’m getting more confident as a player :3 Plus, Nebati’s thing is dual-wielding now which is great. Now to do homework and send off my resume with an iced coffee~ I’ve been drinking so much coffee lately since Lexapro makes me super tired.

[8bityeol]

Love Potion N.9

AU + Witch!Baek // The best place to find a potion is at the house in the forest clearing. In need of a love potion you ask the local wizard but of course there’s a price to pay.

“How much are you willing to part with?” He asks, sliding a finger through your hair.

Swallowing, you take a step back, but the room seems to become smaller as he closes the new distance. “W-what do you mean?” You ask, blinking far too fast to even fake confidence. If he could smell weakness (he probably could) you’d be burning his sinuses.

“It’s not an easy process you know. It’s tedious.” He says, with a cat-like smile stretching his face. “First, I have to find the ingredients,” He points to the rack of herbs and bottles behind you, “Then I have to mix everything together, and some of those ingredients are poisonous. George’s root? It’s a nasty little thing, it gives you warts-”  

“I’ll do it,” You butt in, thinking he’d at least have the heart to step back.

Unmoving, He presses a finger on your lips, “I wasn’t done Kitten.”  

You mumble a muffled sorry.

“You can’t do it,” He says with a hint of seriousness that causes your blood to still. You wouldn’t be so..so scared if he wasn’t so close and if his eyes were a normal colour for starters. Who in the world has yellow eyes? “You wanna know why?” he continues.

You really don’t, but in this situation, it’d seemed right to nod.  He could kill you easily. A quick slice of the neck or a hurried mumble of some spell, you would been ash in no time and swept away by a simple flick of broom.

“Because you don’t have The Book,” at the mention of ‘The Book’, a flash of purple runs through his irises and from the corner of your eye you can see pages of large book fluttering as if a large gust of wind has just entered. “And only I can use The Book, you can’t. If you happen to use it, I can’t guarantee your life.”

Finally, he moves his finger and much to your disgust or horror, he swipes it across the lapel of his jacket. it wasn’t as if forced him to slap his finger across your mouth! the nerve! but what would you expect from a man who lives alone in the forest, manners yes, but social cues, of course not.

“Anyways, what are you willing to give me?” His eyes pierce into yours as if he was looking into your deepest and darkest secrets, those which you rather die with than let anyone know.

What were you willing to give him? Your voice? but he wasn’t Ursula and it wasn’t as if you had the voice of Celine Dion; it was more like a chicken. Maybe it was your body….no. Anything but that. But what if it was what he wanted. As your thoughts derailed into things unimaginable you could feel the blood rushing to your face.

You can’t bare to look him anymore, considering how close he was, you could see every pore dotted across his clear face. “I’ve got money,” You say.

As if fueled by your nervousness, his grin grows bigger and deep chuckles burst from within him. “Money? not that useless thing!” He says, “I need something more, something worth so much more. Every jack and jill has money. Kitten, what I want isn’t material.”

Your hands fly to your chest, “N-no I can’t!”  

His face stills, “Huh…?” He cocks his head to the side, blinks a few times. “What exactly did you have in mind?”

Barely able to breathe, you squeeze your eyes shut and wish yourself somewhere far. Preferably under the covers of your bed.He hadn’t even been thinking of sex…yet you. Fuck.

“Nothing, I was just…” You say, just able to form the words. “Nothing.”

“You thought I wanted your body.”  Its statement, not a question.

“No, no, no. You’ve got it all wrong!” The words come out rushed and messy.

He narrows his eyes and smirks, he was enjoying this. “With your level of protest, I can’t help but think I am in fact right. You thought I wanted your body … how dirty. Here I was thinking you were innocent.”

“I wasn’t thinking that!” This time you talk through gritted teeth, you couldn’t take the constant teasing anymore.

He tuts you, “Don’t lie Kitten. But let’s clear things up, I’m not that depraved to ask for your body in payment. Not every wizard or warlock is a sex crazed freak, we do have humane thoughts. Understand?”

You nod diligently, “I understand. It was just nerves and you’re really close so my mind couldn’t help but wander.”

he looks down, finally noticing that he’d been practically leaning closer and closer to you. He takes a few steps back until he’s leaning against the island, “Ahh, personal space…sorry. I can’t seem to grasp the concept.”  

Regaining some composure you say: ‘thank you’

“Anyways, what does a young girl like you need a love potion?” He asks, running his eyes over you so quick you only caught it by a half a second.

The answer was simple and humiliating at best, but if it was what was needed for the potion then so be it. You’d already come so far. “My friend. I know there’s something there, I can feel it, but he never acts on it and I’m tired of waiting  so, I’m sure this little potion might quicken things up a bit.”

“Look, I know I’m not a person of great moral standing and all, but, is this really the right thing to do?” He says, “If it’s not meant to be, then why force it? What if you end up hating him? Sometimes, the person who you think is the water in the desert, might just be the mirage.”

You stare at him dead in the eye, “Well if he is a mirage then so be it. I’m a big girl, I can handle it.”

He snorts in amusement, “Aren’t we confident?”

“What is the payment?” You ask, dreading the words that may come from his mouth. He could ask for anything, gods, what if he asked for your soul? is that possible?

He holds one finger up, a wordless hang on. He disappears into another room and after some clangs and clashes…and a meow? He emerges holding a paper in his hand.“Found it!” He exclaims.

He motions for you to sit on the chair facing his desk. The desk seemed to be the only thing kept in order, the parchment had its place, the books had its place and the pens had its place. But the rest of the room was another situation. Vials were scattered around the room, vintage cups were stacked in some far corner. It was a mission in itself to get to said seat.

“OK here is the contract,” He slides the paper across the desk, “It basically says that I cannot be held accountable for anything that could occur after I hand the potion to you. Meaning that if your beloved takes this potion and dies or experiences and adverse side-effects, you have no right to gather up the citizens and come at my door with pitchforks.”

“That’s all well and good, but the payment?” You press.

He leans over the table and flips the page, “It says right here the appropriate payment for the potion you have requested, the love potion, is….your first born child.”

Your eyes widen, surely he didn’t say first born child?

“F-first born child?” A shakiness lines your voice, he nods. “You can’t possibly…I can’t…my first?”

A seemingly sympathetic look overcomes him, maybe its real. you can’t tell. “I know, I didn’t make the rules. It’s the witchcraft council, but on the brightside its only the first one, you and your beloved could have twenty more?”

“There must be some other option?” You ask voice airy and weak, “It’s a simple potion, the price can’t be that high…please.”

He shakes his head, “The potion you deamingly refer to as ‘simple’ has the power to manipulate and overcome free will, it’s as deadly as poison it’s self. Being in love can drive the most complacent person to do th most outrageous thing, love it’s natural state is deadly, but love in this form? it should be illegal. So, is that simple to you?”

The authority lining his voice brings back the fear by tenfold, how you’d managed to get comfortable around some the likes of him was truly

Here’s the thing, if you sign the contract now and don’t pick up the potion then the payment is null and void, no child will be taken.“

You nod slowly and mull over every single word. Are you willing to do it?

A/N

shout out to this would be series ~ that I started but accidently deleted the other parts cause I wrote it on my phone. I’m still heated about it.

[kpopaganda]

Allied, Part 12

Group: GOT7

Member: Jackson

POV: 1st Person

Type: Angst/Fluff/Series/Other

Word Count: 2,381

Summary: The world is in turmoil. There are few functioning governments left and an incurable disease has wiped out most of the human population. It’s every man for himself until you find an ally who becomes more.

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15

I’d never felt a headache quite as intense as the one I had when I came to. It was like someone made a crack in my skull, stuck a chisel into it and was slowly beating down on it. Opening my eyes was suddenly one of the hardest things I’d ever done.

When I opened my eyes it took several seconds for them to focus and I saw that I was in a very stark, small room. I was in a cell. There were bars on the only window in the room and was solid and looked like it was made out of some kind of metal. It had a small window in it, but I couldn’t see anything but darkness through it. Where was I?

At that point, I realised that I was tied to a chair. Whatever was keeping my hands together was sharp around the edges, like cable ties or thin wire, and I felt it cut into my skin deep enough to draw blood. My feet were tied as well. It was only then that the panic really set in.

I was alone in a dark room. I was tied up, I didn’t know where I was, I was in a stupid amount of pain and I had no way out of that situation. Every time I move my hands, my binds dig further into my skin and I wince. The only other thing for me to do was hope someone would come along and set me free, but I didn’t think that was at all likely. If anything, whoever came along to untie me was probably the same person that tied me up and we weren’t on very good terms.

I’m not sure how much time passed, but when I finally heard movement outside the door, the sun had long since set and I was waiting out my fate in complete darkness. There was shuffling right outside and I heard the little window being opened. It was too dark for me to see anything, but shortly after the whole door opened and I watched as the shadow of a large man came to loom over me.

“Time to stand up,” he told me. “Don’t try anything funny.”

I didn’t even know how to respond, so I just kept quiet. He cut the binds on both my hands and feet and pulled me up by the scruff of my jacket. Then he led me out of my small prison and down a dark hallway. Everything around us looked like solid concrete, so it was cold and felt claustrophobic. I wondered if we were in an old prison, but I wasn’t going to ask my escort. 

Finally, he led me through two different doors before shoving me roughly and making me fly forward only to land with my face inches away from the rough concrete floor. The landing scuffed my hands pretty badly and made me yelp from the added strain to my sore wrists. Finding the strength to look up, I looked around to see that I was surrounded by strangers.

At the front of the room stood a man with his arms crossed, glaring down at me while everyone else sneered and made comments under their breath. I angled myself up onto my knees so get a better look at them, but I got the feeling the man at the center of it all was going to be my biggest problem.

“So,” he boomed. “You think it’s acceptable to steal from us?”

“Wha... What?” I breathed. “I didn’t steal anything from you.”

“Oh really? What do you have to say about this then?”

My backpack appeared out from behind him and he dropped it in front of me, letting me watch the contents spill out on the floor for everyone to see. I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath.

“I didn’t know it belonged to anyone.”

“Too bad for you it does. Everything in that hospital belongs to our community and you tried to steal from us. We don’t take offences like these lightly.”

“I needed the medicine,” I try pleading. “I have someone at home dying of an infection. If he doesn’t get help soon I’ll lose him.” I don’t even realise I’m crying until I feel the tears rolling down my cheeks. “Please. I can’t lose him.”

It was the first time I ever voiced that out loud and it was true. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing Jackson. I didn’t want to imagine a life in this fucked up world without him. The truth was that I cared about him very deeply, that I loved him. I loved him. Jaebum knew, Jackson probably suspected, it was only me that took forever to reach that conclusion and now that I did, there was no way I was letting him go another day without knowing the truth.

Every eye in the room was still on me. The man at the centre exchanged a look with the man next to him before looking at me again. I could hear myself sniffling over the stifled silence of the onlookers. Quite frankly, I felt pathetic, but this wasn’t the time to go flying off the rails.

“Be that as it may,” said the man. “You need to be punished for this transgression. I think a night in the cold would suffice.”

He looked at someone behind me and nodded. It was some kind of queue. I swung around just as two men grabbed me by each arm and dragged me away from the crowd. My first instinct was to struggle, to try and get away from them, but it really wasn’t working. They dragged me out of the building and into a small courtyard. There were more people standing around to stare at me and I wanted to yell for help, but my voice died in my throat. 

They dragged me all the way across the courtyard and out of the building complex. One of the men took off my jacket while the other took off a long piece of rope that he had tied to his belt. They led me to a dead streetlight and tied me to it. Then they left me there.

I immediately saw the point of this punishment. It was really cold out and they’d taken off my only defence from the chill. I just thanked my stars that they didn’t strip me completely, but I was still going to have to survive the night somehow. I tested my restraints and there was no way I was slipping out of it. They tied it super tight. They tied my hands above my head just high enough that I could kind of stand on my toes and I was already feeling the strain.

I cursed myself for being so stupid, not so much for going out to find Jackson medicine, but more for letting myself get caught. I should have known they would look for me in the dispensary. I should have taken out the guy who caught me before he even had a chance. But instead I was strung up like an ornament at Christmas, except there was nothing happy about me.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see movement in one of the windows of the complex. Someone was peeking out to take a look at me, but I couldn’t turn all the way to see. I was a spectacle. How did I ever get myself into this?

With the rope digging into my already raw wrist and the cold wind blowing across my exposed skin, giving me goosebumps, I decided to just kind of wait it out. I hung my head, making sure to turn it away from the building and I cried. What else was there to do at that point but hope I wouldn’t die?

I was having a hard time keeping it together. I was tied up there for several hours already and it wasn’t getting easier to doze off. My body was completely empty of tears and I was afraid I might be dehydrated, but my bigger concern was the excruciating headache that dominated ever other one of my senses. On the brightside, it meant that the sting in my wrists wasn’t bothering me as much.

There was a moment where I thought I might actually fall asleep, but then the wind whistled in a way that sounded like someone saying my name and it woke me right back up. There was a beat of silence before I heard it again, more clearly and in a familiar voice now. I opened my tired eyes, but I didn’t have enough strength to really look anywhere specific until I heard it again.

“Y/N, look at me.”

I lifted my head to find myself looking into the most familiar pair of brown eyes.

“Jackson,” I said, my voice coming out garbled from a mixture of shock and pain. “What are you doing here?” I was happy for almost a second before I realised where he was. “Oh my gosh, you’re sick. You shouldn’t be here! Jackson, you should be back at the barn.”

“Yeah, well, so should you,” he said, his voice hard. 

He cut me loose and all my weight dropped onto him where I held onto his arms for support. His eyes were red-rimmed and I could feel his fever where I held onto his arms to keep steady. I couldn’t believe he was standing, much less that he was standing in front of me. Jaebum was standing behind him with his gun drawn and his eyes on the building, but he did spare me a glance to see if I was really okay. Jackson pulled my jacket on and pulled me away from the building, but I held fast. Both men looked at me like I was crazy for resisting.

“There’s no way I’m leaving without that medicine,” I told them.

“Y/N, this is not...” Jackson tried protesting before I stopped him.

“You obviously didn’t understand me correctly. I said I’m not leaving without that fucking medicine.”

The two of them exchanged a look before turning back to me. Without another word, Jaebum pulled another gun out of the waistband of his pants and handed it to me. I could see Jackson was a lot more unsure about this mission than Jaebum and I, but he pulled out his own weapon anyway.

“I think I know where they left my stuff,” I told them as we slowly approached the building. “How are we getting out of here?”

“There’s a car parked a block away,” said Jaebum.

“Okay, so I suggest we go in, get the stuff and get the fuck out. Let’s avoid conflict at all costs. These people may not have killed me, but they’re still dangerous.”

Surprisingly there was no one stationed in the courtyard. Everyone who was watching us earlier was gone and I could only assume they had gone to bed. The guys followed me through the courtyard and into the room where everyone was gathered to see what my punishment would be. There was still no one around and my bag wasn’t on the floor where they dumped it out anymore. I cursed under my breath and continued down the hall.

I didn’t want to just open random doors, but we were running out of valuable getaway time, so I started opening random doors until I found something. I yanked open a door to a small storeroom/kitchenette where we found a woman who was boiling water. She blanched when she saw us and as she was about to scream I stopped her.

“We’re not going to hurt you,” I told her. “Just help me find my stuff.”

With her leading the way, the four of us made our way through the building and into another storeroom where my backpack was waiting on the shelf right by the door. I checked to see if everything was still inside and when I saw that it was, I slipped it onto my back. Jaebum went into his leader mode by grabbing the woman and leading all of us back the way we came. He was using her as a buffer, basically, because when we came across two men just before we reached the courtyard, he pulled her in front of us and made sure the men saw his gun pointed at her. I wasn’t exactly comfortable with it and I could tell Jackson wasn’t either by the way he grabbed my hand.

Jaebum kept the woman in front of us like a shield until we were completely outside the building. He only let her go when we reached the streetlamp I was tied to and then we took off running to the car.

The two of them got into the front while I slid into the back and after a few tries at starting the car, it roared to life and we took off into the night. Jackson was still tense, but I wasn’t sure if it was because of what we just did or because I went out at all. There was a long drive ahead of us though, so instead of getting into it with him I laid down and let him give me the silent treatment until he eventually fell asleep.

We drove until I heard Jackson snoring softly in the passenger seat, so I sat up and leant forward to talk to Jaebum.

“I can’t believe you brought him with you,” I said, making sure Jaebum could pick up the annoyance in my voice.

“I didn’t bring him,” he shot back. “He pretty much took over the rescue mission as soon as I filled him in. How about you just say thank you that we saved you?”

“Thank you,” I said a little too snarkily, but then I tried again when I realised how rude I came off. “Really. Thank you. I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

He smiled at me through the rearview mirror. “You’re welcome.”

I couldn’t wait to get home anymore, especially now that we had what we needed to get Jackson fixed up. I was just happy that we would have the normal him back soon.

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[j-5230]

okay honestly i have zero fucking clue what the fuck just happened i was literally just minding my own business on tumblr and stuff and then literally everything hits me but it's just so fucking annoying at this point it's the same shit as always; sam, my dad, my cousin, my space and how much it affects my day-to-day life. like i'm so fucking tired of those things like yes what happened to me was bad but it's been so long like why am i still on this shit I don't understand. and i hate how much control sam has had over my life when he literally thinks he did absolutely nothing wrong and that it was my fault when I know it wasn't but he really does make me believe that it was my fault like what. he's actually worthless and a piece of shit and i do what to talk to him sometimes just to have closure bc kara thinks that's what would help me move on but I don't want him to think that i want him back in my life or that i'm weak and that's why i'm talking to him bc i feel like he thinks that i'm going to come back eventually which is so so so FALSE. friday night and today literally had ZERO -- none -- absolutely no triggers. buuuut the brightside of my momentary sad thing is that it wasn't a full blown episode like usual, like yes it did last long like almost two hours but it wasn't as intense as the other ones which idk if that's a good thing bc that means I might have another one which is no bueno. and now I feel absolutely fine like wtf why is life like this it's as if I literally wasn't crying and wanting to die and hated every part of my life and was panicking over how i'm not sure if part of my life is true or not like what.. that's wild.. the brain is fucking crazy i'm literally just gonna text all my friends like nothing happened because in my head, nothing did like i'm already blocking it out as I'm typing like wow i'm so fucking dumb wow even my attitude while writing this has changed honestly my life is suCH a mess anyways if any of my friends see this which i hope no one does (i just write this to remember for therapy and stuff) but yes anyways I'm done i think i'm just gonna watch youtube videos life sucks sometimes but then your brain makes u think that it doesn't anymore so you're like.. okay whatever okay thanks