#but honestly i don't have any tats but most of the ones i ever consider are to do with him.... i have issues

[wikitpowers]

no bc what if after tlkof comes out i'll be tempted to get a kit quote tattoo??????? and what if i actually do it????????

[staliamazing]

tag game TEHEH

name: sarah !!!! c'est moi

age: twenty, to be twenty-one soon-ish. i am planning a party. will i go through with it? who's to say.

star sign: taurus sun, capricorn rising, gemini moon. i have beef with geminis so the last one deeply upsets me.

first language: english

second language: je parle français !!

i was near fluent and have my B2 but don't practice anymore. i am considering getting back into it because i feel i need more hobbies and highly regret throwing out all my textbooks and notes. (that's a whole other story i LOVED school and threw out all my damn notes and stuff?!?!? sarah you dumb dumb)

favorite lip product: that lush lip scrub! i've lost my peppermint tub but anticipate it turning up when i least expect it. my lips always has excess skin peeling off for some reason so its great to feel exfoliated!

the best food dish you can make without a recipe? um. pizza bread! pizza, pizza sauce, cheese. eat up friends!

if you drink tea, what kind? none, get away from me. SOMETIMES lipton peach iced tea but only if im at mad mex.

if you drink coffee, what roast do you usually get? see last answer. i get the jitters.

favorite thing to watch on youtube right now: THE BALD AND THE BEAUTIFUL. i;ve been watching upwards of two episodes every night in bed.

favorite thing to watch on youtube in 2012: for sure mormon family vloggers. pick a channel i probably watched them. i have no fucking clue why!

favorite item of clothing right now: new graphic tee! the alice oseman x everpress collab with this gorg patchwork design and all little queer and trans doodles over it! the proceeds went to LGBTQIA+ refugees <3 i fucking love graphic tees holy shit

favorite item of clothing in 2012: some form of graphic leggings im certain.

fandom -

three movies you recommend: the half of it on netflix - watched recently and was confused but pleasantly surprised

your favorite concert: either one i went to with my gf! they were both great experiences even though i was shitting myself before both because i have a lot of sound and crowd sensitiivities ( # actually autistic). i loved being in the pit for ATL despite not knowing any songs and i like how you can feel the music inside you.

have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? no i've actually followed someone because i love getting mad <3 over time i have grown to really respect them and where their views come from which im proud of because i can be a bit close-minded.

the best tv show you watched last year: i watch a lot of shows! recently though i watched euphoria and understood the hype. couldn't rewatch though. it felt like a disservice to the shock factor i feel like the show really feeds off.

do you have a fancasting you just can’t let go of? don't pay much attention to fancasts!

a ship you’ve abandoned: im so sorry amy and rory from doctor who... i legit met them too. it just doesnt hit the same and im glad they divorced. amy was too swept up in the doctor and rory is a damn sweetheart who honestly deserves better. ALSO maya and lucas from girl meets world - bit random honestly why did they do that. lucas and riley from day one. maya and zay!

on a scale of 1-10 how willing are you to share your ao3 history? 7? depends on who to! anyone on here sure. not real people they'd be like "what do you mean you like fics where that little thug man wears short skirts" they just wouldnt UNDERSTAND

what fandom do you wish was bigger? tori spring fandom! maybe it is and i just dont know but.

do you have a fandom tattoo? yah, the fandom of my high school english teacher! most of my tats are literary inspired and specifically books i read in school for the curriculum.

my others are - phoebe bridgers related

gf related (she tattooed me) (fave fandom) (she's the best)

has a finale ever ruined a show for you? definitely i just can't remember which lmao im sorry

have you…

swam in an ocean? yep! swam is a strong word though. i've been in and bobbed up and down! i usually run from the tide.

been vegan/vegetarian? both! at different times. it was very much part of my friend and family culture growing up.

gone skinny dipping? yes, in my exs best friends dads girlfriends dead uncles pool :) honestly 10/10 swimming with clothes on is so random? i think its so beautiful how people look under the blue wavy water of the pool.

gone skiing? no i am scared of the snow since learning about crevasses in year 4 and almost falling off a ski lift at a very young age. i do love the cold and the ski lodge episode of gmw though.

thanks for the tag @iansw0rld, these are fun :)

[scarecoen]

Trigger warning ⚠️ domestic violence.

I've typed this story a million times so I'm just going to summarize as much as I can.

A few days ago I was assaulted by my partner's family members. And as I've mentioned, I've typed this a million times and I'm honestly just exhausted thinking about it, but we could use some help.

My partner has always had a transphobic family. (I don't have anyone but my dad, who's in no position to help anyone.)

Her mom used her disability against her and manipulated her into giving her MOST of her checks. She's abused the system and my girlfriend.

When I met Jackie, she was with a terrible biggot. Jackie had came out, and her mother conspired with an abusive long distance ex, to fly her here, to stage an "intervention" and stop my partner from transitioning.

It worked. For years.

I met Jackie here on tumblr, we became good, SECRET friends because she wasn't allowed to talk to anyone.

I told Jackie openly about my views regarding gender and how I myself, was not cis.

Eventually she told her partner about us playing games together, which she responded to by harassing me.

Jackie ended up spilling the beans to me, about her mom, about the ex, everything. I realized that she had been extremely isolated and controlled her whole life.

So I intervened.

I got the two of them to separate, which wasn't smooth because Jackie was scared. She had been with her abuser for 9 years at this point. She's never known anything else.

The ex moved back to her state, and I started seeing Jackie, although she was stuck at her mom's... who was trying to play innocent at this time.

Eventually, I kinda just came and picked her up, she stayed the night, she didn't want to go back home. And I can't blame her. The house wasn't only disgusting, her family microagressed her all the time and they would tell her to pretty much stay in a dark room all day.

Ofc I didn't bring her back.

During early quarantine, we had a lot of self reflection and she started distancing herself from her mother, coming around to holding her accountable for her horrible actions.

Her mom messaged her things like "Why won't you talk to me? It's like you're trying to punish us!" Ect, just every fucking manipulative thing she could say, without ever apologizing.

Unfortunately the place we were staying fell through when my best friend's ex husband decided he wants a divorce and decided to throw in some transphobic hatespeach towards me.

We were all looking for somewhere to go.

I'm sure you know where this is going but listen, she told us EVERYTHING we wanted to hear. She told us she's not hateful now, told us she would go to trans support groups, pride, said she's realized how much she loves Jackie and it's time to accept her- and look- we had NO WHERE TO GO. We have 2 cats and at the time, a car that has no a/c or functional locks. AND I have a chronic autoimmune condition that I recently started taking chemo meds for. (Methotrexate.)

I'm too sick to be on the street, and survive. I had to think about me, Jackie, Zoe, and Boops.

And Jackie wanted to go..

I told her we'd be cautious and try to get out asap.

Well, looking for places right when the housing market crashed really fucked us up. That- and because I had only just finally got approved for disability, means I was set back in life- and had no credit to my name. No credit= no place to live.

I had almost built enough, but things went down hill very quickly with her family. Which leads us to right now:

After weeks of microagressions, giving us breakthrough covid cases, yelling at us to clean other's messes, and forcing us and our cats to isolate in our room, many broken promises, and straight up transphobic hatespeach (because she promised to get vaccinated but then said nvm as soon as we moved in and she went on vacation and got covid and gave it to us, which nearly killed me--) she said not getting the vaccine "IS A CHOICE, JUST LIKE YOU BEING TRANS AND TAKING *gestures to my testosterone* THOSE DRUGS."

We just were avoiding each other while I desperately try to gather resources for us to get out, NOW.

Of course, that wasn't good enough, so when her step father messaged her in all caps about our cats having to stay in our room and "I WON'T FUCKING TELL YOU AGAIN" my partner had a breakdown..

Her mom had let her step dad talk to her like this her whole life, basically.

Out of desperation, we went to her sister for help, maybe hoping she'd give us a place to stay for two weeks while we sign off on the lease for our new apartment.

She pretended to want to help and even said... something fucking weird? She made the comment that I'm a good person and I'm so much like her own boyfriend, that it's "scary"...

A few hours later she came to the house. She talked nicely to us, to gain access to our bedroom.

Then she attacked me.

I called the police right before, and was on the phone with dispatch when she lunged at me because she was aggressively trying to MAKE Jackie go into a separate room WITHOUT ME and Jackie was saying no, BEGGING her to STOP.

I wasn't going to let her take Jackie into that room. She looked fucking crazy.

All of the family came into our room, her two sisters, her mom, and her cousin- When they heard yelling.

It was actually me telling her mom that she's a terrible mother, that triggered her sister to try and attack me- although I knew she was planning on trying to from the moment she came into our room.

And that was after her mom was screaming in my face that if I have something to say, say it now.

Dispatch heard everything and sent emt as well...

But the police stayed outside, talking to them for a WHILE before even asking for us.

Her cousin is the only one that would have stood up for me, saying her sister never should have tried to hit me. But he was in the room with Jackie, giving her support...

I faced the cops alone.

He already had "that look."

He shined a light into my eye, letting the family stay on the porch, throwing insults and just letting it happen. He asked me where I'm hurt, and before I could even show him the scratches on my arm, he said "how do I know YOU didn't put those there?"

I wanted to fucking die in that moment.

This is a conservative city.

No one has equality stickers here. No one flies gay flags. People here that are lgbt- they LEAVE.

This is EXACTLY WHY.

I said "well is there any reason I should tell you anything when, clearly, you're already bias?"

I looked at the emts. I looked at his partner. I looked at all the lights and people coming out of their houses-

And behind me was her family.

Her sister that assaulted me, was laughing about having work in the morning.

All of them were looking at me, with hate in their eyes.

He tried to feed me bullshit about "well if I'm taking someone to jail, there has to be proof."

He dismissed everything I attempted to say, until I just stared at the ground and he decided he did his job here.

I told him my whole fucking body hurts because I had 4 people fucking toss my 100lbs ass all over the fucking room, which was a mess that he refused to look at.

He said "I don't see bruises."

I SPAT "BRUISES TAKE TIME?"

He retorted IMMEDIATELY- "YOU'RE NOT EVEN RED."

I asked what about the dispatcher- she seemed concerned- to which he said "you see, sometimes when people call us- they scream and be dramatic- for a quicker response."

I asked what we could do while the two weeks go by for our new place, and he fucking said "I DONT KNOW. BARRICADE YOURSELF IN YOUR ROOM OR SOMETHING."

Needless to say, we are now safe, in a hotel and I've gotten in touch with a few lgbt organizations that are attempting to help us get justice.

Unfortunately because it's a holiday weekend, all we can do is wait right now.

Our first order of business is getting a protection order, so that we can retrieve the rest of our things without her sister trying to attack us again. (I say us because she kept jumping towards Jackie, like she was threatening to hit her.)

I've been so gaslit and victim blamed that I was too scared to go to the er, even though this all happened in the midst of a flare, possibly including my liver health.

There's so much more to this story, as I'm sure other trans people can relate.. unfortunately.

The emts reluctantly offered to take me to the er, but I was like "and leave my partner here with them?" And he just fucking shrugged dude.

I hate this city.

I want out so bad but unfortunately I've committed to a year, but at least it'll be *our* apartment.

We could NOT stay there for two more weeks. Her step dad is a violent offender that has attempted to murder a homeless prostitute over some fucking pocket change- and he has a GUN in the house.

This hotel might run us into a hole, despite it being the cheapest, shittiest hotel in town, it's still going to be about 700$ for ONE week.

To ADD INSULT TO INJURY, SOMEONE ATTEMPTED TO STEAL MY VEHICLE WHILE WE'VE BEEN STAYING HERE.

I'm feeling incredibly paranoid and unsafe, but I'm on anxiety meds now at least and its SORTA helping us cope (My partner and I have the same Dr and she gave her permission to have some.)

The organization BRAVO is trying to help us with a hotel voucher, but because of all the natural disasters, it's hard to find room in charity for people like us, which is fair enough. We aren't immediately on the street, and for that I'm incredibly thankful.

However, if you or anyone you know wish to help you can donate to venmo: kittyzibby. Or you could just signal boost this.

If you can't help, I understand. And IF YOU'RE STRUGGLING FINANCIALLY, don't worry about it, for real.

Right now I'm just scared we'll go into debt before getting the apartment settled in.

I will update on things once our case moves along more, and we were already considering turning to OF sexwork before all of this, so if there could be support that way, maybe we'll get that going once we get moved in. That way, I feel good about providing a service in return.

Thank you so much for sticking with us during all of this. And really- we're doing much better today. We've given each other pep talks, but we are still determined to start our lives together.

Her family was merely trying to scare me away from her, but I got my girl's name tatted on me for a reason.

I know I'm not the bad person here.

Every time Jackie is feeling more gender euphoric, and showing me her changes, and seeing her get more confident, the more I know that what I'm doing with and for her, is right.

I love her so much. And I will never abandon her, like they tried to get me to do.

Jackie is taking a break from some socials, but she's given me permission to talk about what's been happening.

She needs justice too.

I will update as much as I can, but seriously, I think we both just have a fire under our asses now.

Mentally, we're stronger than ever.

Thank you for reading. My heart really goes out to the rest of the queer community that have experienced or are going through similar things.

It's really made me realize why we need to stick together and fight this bigotry bullshit! 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

[punkscowardschampions]

Grace & Janis

Grace: Not to cause drama but your man can't stay away 😂💓 insisted on giving me the caravan keys himself this morning babes Janis: 'Cos he's not my man, go hog wild Grace: OH HUNNY NO 😭 WHAT HAPPENED? OMG DID HE GO TOO FAR WITH THE PRETTY WOMAN SITU Janis: No, sadly I'm not 3 grand better off for it, Grace. Janis: Just run its course, I'm over it. Grace: I can't believe he'd use you like that! 🐖 After you took him on hols too OUTRAGEOUS 😧 Grace: You'll be okay though babe you are better off if he's gonna be like that Grace: OMG ITS THE CURSE OF SKERRIES! REMEMBER ME AND TY Janis: Maybe I used him? Ever think of that Janis: Nah, I don't...which one was that Grace: That's right gurl ♀ take control of the narrative Grace: You dumped him, consider it announced 💋 Grace: He had that well buff neck tat, remember? Janis: Its the truth. Nothing happened anyway, not proper. Janis: I'd rather keep it to myself but if you must, cheers Janis: Ahh, borstal boy Grace: 🙊 Gotcha 😇 Grace: Is that in 11? He was from there Grace: Anyway you should come on my juice cleanse Janis: No Grace, lol never mind, don't worry about it Janis: How am I gonna work out with nothing but a belly full of juice? I need protein Janis: but I wouldn't hate the vitamins and electrolytes, sometimes Grace: Oh Jan-Jan EVERYONE else manages it 🙄 but you are going through a break up 😢 just don't eat your feelings too hard. Asia's still trying to lose lbs 2 boys later 🙈 Grace: Yayyy! Come to town with me. It's lush there. 😜 drinks aren't bad either lol Janis: That's because you all only do half an hour of light cardio at best Janis: No I'm not, and there are no feelings to eat, I'll be in better shape now he's gone, more time to hit the gym, no more cafe shit Janis: Asia just wants an excuse to get fat, in or out of a relationship Janis: Not today, I'm busy but tomorrow lunch maybe Janis: I cba to be at school for any more time than is required Janis: might throw a sickie Grace: Rude! I know you're hurting but there's no need to come for me and my gym routine Grace: You don't have to pretend with me, babes 🤗 Grace: Unfair, Jan! She's been to WW and everything! It's so sad. Such a struggle Grace: YES! I'll phone in too. We can have a duvet day together. SISTER TIME SICKIE Grace: 💕 You'll feel better in no time Janis: I truly ain't. Janis: And if you don't want me to come for it, try harder, same goes for Asia. Janis: If she actually wanted it, she could, simple as. Janis: Nah, you have to spread my side of the story, don't you? Need you on the frontlines Janis: Plus, I'm going nan and grandad's, not home Grace: EXCUSE YOU BITCH I WAS AT THE GYM FOR 3 HOURS LAST NIGHT Grace: Okay yeah good point, can't let him chat shit about you after everything ugh Janis: Taking selfies? Lol, alright, alright, well done you Janis: I'm sure he won't.. Janis: It'll be everyone else Janis: Don't try and 'come' for him, Grace, that would be so embarrassing. Just set other people right, that's what I mean, right? Grace: thnx 😘 Grace: Boys can't even help themselves Grace: Oh Jan I'm not gonna fight him!! 😂 Don't worry I got this Janis: Yeah but just don't even chat to him Janis: I know YOU can't help yourself Janis: but I don't need it, Grace Grace: 🤐 Going to him for goss? Please. I'd never. Grace: He'd only lie anyway Grace: I can't 🤞 to hold the girls back tho Janis: For God's sake, its none of their business Janis: This is what I mean, everyone getting involved, can't people just leave it Grace: Bailey did lock lips with him first, babe Grace: You can't blame her for feeling wronged Janis: Yeah I can, when she practically grabs up on boys like Trump Janis: Its not on Janis: If she wants to try again, she can, she don't need to drag my name into her piss-poor attempt at chat Grace: Your ex WOULD say it went down like that 🙄 Grace: He's so gross! I shouldn't have let you near him 😧 Janis: It isn't just him Janis: she's getting herself a worse rep than she already had Grace: OMG JANIS STOP SLUT SHAMING MY FRIEND Grace: I can't believe my twin is such a bad feminist Janis: I can't believe you're siding with the abuser, and not believing a victim Janis: If you wanna chat that bullshit Janis: so leave it out Grace: You shouldn't throw words like that around. It's no joke Janis: It isn't. Janis: Let JGG know before she gets in trouble Grace: YOU STILL LOVE HIM, DON'T YOU? 😭 SO SAD Grace: I get you siding with your boy now Grace: poor Jan-Jan. I'll get him back for you don't worry Janis: No, it wasn't that deep, it was only a few months, get real Janis: Never did Janis: I don't want him back, focus on getting him for yourself, like you always wanted Grace: Oh honey...whatever you need to tell yourself sweetie Grace: I hate hearing you like this Grace: He really did a number on you 😢 Grace: We'll say no more about him Janis: I'm not you, Grace. I don't have to pretend it was love in the moment, or after, just to make myself fell better and to let the world know I'm not a skank. Janis: Good, stop talking, you've got no idea. Grace: DON'T TAKE YOUR MOOD OUT ON ME I'M ONLY TRYING TO HELP Janis: Well you're not so stop trying, thanks Grace: Well now I know what to get you for christmas ffs! Grace: You need therapy, girl Grace: No-one else can talk to you when you're like this Janis: I hope you've not pulled me in secret santa, 'cos you're almost as bad at gifting as 'helping' Janis: you can't either, you just like the sound of your own voice Janis: and i'm the fucked up one, lol Grace: Mum and dad will send you, you know, they're always chatting about it Grace: see how edgy you are then Janis: good luck, i'm capable of keeping my mouth shit for more than five minutes Janis: no wonder all your boyfriends use yours then bounce, who could bare you Janis: if we weren't related to you, none of us would Grace: Maybe that's your problem, babe. Jimmy obvs wasn't feeling the strong silent type Grace: At least I've had boyfriends you've done it once and think you're an expert Grace: No wonder he got fed up Janis: Yeah, he's really after a girl just like you, that's why he does everything possible to avoid you Janis: You're the clueless one, Cher lol Grace: It's hilarious to me that you think I was ever interested in your fuckboy barista Grace: Both lads he works with are well fitter for a start Grace: I was happy for you, doesn't mean I'd be happy to go there Janis: You're so blatant the old dears having their pot of tea went to fucking pray for you after Janis: The idea you think you're slick enough that he didn't notice, I didn't notice, that the whole fucking town isn't aware who you want to ride next, is what's hilarious Janis: Sort yourself out, its embarrassing Grace: Nothing could be as embarrassing as having you for a sister 😂 Grace: Go cry to nan babes I'm over it Janis: The feeling's more than mutual, GracieGuru Janis: No one crying but you, as per Grace: As if I'd waste the mascara. Get a life Janis: I've got one, and it isn't yours to share; a fact you haven't been able to stand since you fell out of mum with me Grace: 😂 WHERE? You've got no friends, no lad and you hang out with our grandparents most nights Grace: so much to envy Janis: and yet, I'd sooner that than yours Janis: and that's what's really sad Janis: poor wittle gracie poo Grace: Next time you go running just keep going like Grace: Nobody'll mind here Janis: Yeah, 'cos they all love you Janis: You don't fit in Janis: Changeling baby, nowhere else to go Janis: Mum always liked taking in strays Grace: Must've been why she kept you Janis: Burn Grace: If you fit in so well why are you never here Grace: Too busy thinking you're above me to bother with the rest. That's sad Janis: Cos I can't fucking stand you, Grace Janis: and if I'm anywhere within a mile radius of you, I'm liable to kill you Janis: and you aren't worth the prison time Grace: Wow I'm so intimidated Janis: You aren't meant to be Janis: No one here but you needs to front Janis: Its the truth, you make my life hell Grace: Chats the girl who does nothing but Grace: You only went out with the barista because you THOUGHT I was interested Grace: Such a loser move Grace: Don't expect me to feel bad for you Janis: Jokes on you because I didn't go out with him Janis: He wanted you and your marauding band of molesters to get the hint and leave him and the others alone Janis: and you just made yourself look more and more idiotic every time, just been laughing about you behind your back this whole time Janis: It was a laugh Janis: So, do you get it now, hun? I'm not devvo, I'm just bored of making a fool out of you when you're happy to do it by yourself every day of your life Grace: Like I'd believe that. He dumped you because you're so crap you can't even make a candlelit bath sexy, cope with it Janis: Believe what you want, sweetheart, I'm not the one that's full of shit Grace: Yeah you are Janis: Oh honey...whatever you need to tell yourself sweetie Grace: @yourself next time babes Janis: you already did Janis: i bow to your infinite wisdom Janis: you should write a blog, oh wait- you already do and no one fucking reads it, 'cos you're a basic bitch giving children life advice like you have any idea what you're doing Grace: And you do? 😂 Faking a relationship for MONTHS to mess with me when all I've been is supportive about you getting a lad in the first place Grace: Such a good one of yours Janis: Yeah, this is hilarious Janis: like you ain't reacting exactly how I hoped you would, you pathetic bitch Janis: I knew it was fake, you need to catch yourself on Janis: fake friends, fake fun, fake boyfriends, fake happiness Janis: its honestly sad, you need therapy Grace: Yeah I need to catch myself on to how pathetic you are for literally living a cliche so bad it wouldn't air on CW Grace: To think I thought you were actually sorting yourself out. That's sad Janis: and yet, you and your gal pals lap up every episode Janis: just like you did here, so predictable i could set a watch to you Janis: what, to be like you? you're so sorted? Janis: no one wants to be like you grace, no one would ever want that Janis: you can joke and hashtag about goals, but if having to see you is anything like having to be you Janis: i'd sooner join edie Grace: That's a sick thing to say. Don't bring her into your bullshit, Janis Janis: MY bullshit? Janis: This ain't nothing but you, as per Janis: You're like fucking black mould, spreading everywhere, ruining everything, suffocating us all Janis: and I can talk about her all I fucking want, fuck you Janis: just cos you wanna pretend she didn't exist Grace: No I don't I just don't think it's fair that you use her death to play the victim with me now Grace: To say you'd rather die than deal with your bs is gross Janis: Yeah its only okay when you do it Janis: woe is you Janis: suicide is so gross ew Janis: what a problematic cunt you are Grace: You using it to guilt me is Grace: If you want to kill yourself don't put that on me Grace: You gonna leave me tapes? Fuck off Janis: Why not? Janis: Someone's at fault Janis: we all know who's fault it was Edie died Janis: its no secret Grace: And I'm at fault for your EVERY issue, sure Jan Grace: Don't take any responsibility at all Janis: Did I say that? Janis: You're a cunt, own it Janis: Don't pretend you care, 'cos I didn't ask you to and it does fuck all for me or you Janis: I'm not interested in being your sister, never mind anything beyond a familial tie so drop dead, sincerely Grace: I do care, bitch. How dare you. Grace: Yeah like death fixes anything. I'd still be your sister. Cope with it Janis: At least you'd be my dead sister, that's easier Grace: Yeah because you handle it all so well Janis: Better than I handle having to be anywhere near you Janis: Don't you get it yet? I hate you Grace: Then don't be. Run away to Grandad's. Nobody is bothered I already told you Janis: You are, you delusional cunt! Janis: You always try to talk to me, you won't leave me the fuck alone Janis: who started this conversation Janis: I do everything that's humanly possible to avoid you and you still won't sto