#but it backfired 🤪

[yoohyeon]

I force myself to go out take a walk to spend Halloween with my goddaughter and my other cousin’s kid and after an hour of waiting she « forgot » to tell me where they were and had already left 😑

[twinsimming]

Growing Pains by Twinsimming 🥰😥🤗😴🤪🥺

Growing up is hard, and going through phases may make it a little harder.

Inspired by the phases system from The Sims 4: Parenthood, this mod aims to make younger sims’ personalities more dynamic.

This is a script mod that can be placed in your Packages folder. It was built and tested on 1.69 but should work fine on 1.67.

Requirements

The Sims 3: Late Night

The Sims 3: Generations

The Sims 3: Showtime

The Sims 3: Supernatural

The Sims 3: University Life

Overview

Phases System

List of Phases

New Moodlets

Phases System

Toddlers, children, and teens can now experience phases that change their personality.

Phases are moodlets that temporarily change one of a sim’s traits. Phase moodlets last for 2 days, with a 48 hour cooldown between the end of their most recent phase and when a sim is able to experience a phase again.

Each time a toddler, child, or teen sim wakes up, they will have a chance of experiencing a phase. The base chance of experiencing a phase is 20%, but this chance can increase or decrease by 5% based on the factors/moodlets listed below:

Increased Chance

- Witnessed Divorce - Witnessed Death - Witnessed Betrayal - Heartbroken - Stuff Taken - Stir Crazy - Abducted by Aliens - Embarrassed - Lost a Friend - Negative Mood - Has Enemy - In Trouble (Generations punishment system) - Stress Moodlets (Stressed, Strained) - Has No Friends Outside of Household - Adult Household Member Dislikes Children - Negative Relationship with Adult Household Member - Negative Prom Moodlets (Ditched, Got in a Fight, Denied) - Negative Celebrity Moodlets (Got Recognized Negative, Publicly Disgraced) - Negative Job Moodlets (Overworked, Fired) - Negative Social Moodlets (Lonely, Desolate, It’s Like I’m Invisible, Misunderstood, Need to Brood, Rejected) - Negative Romance Moodlets (Rejected First Kiss, Betrayed, Dumped by Text, Rejected by Ex) - Punishment Moodlets (Got in Trouble, Got Put in Timeout, Privilege Revoked, Grounded, Prank Backfire, Caught Pranking, Caught After Curfew, Detention)

Decreased Chance

- Has Friend Outside Household - Friends with Adult Household Member - Adult Household Member Has Positive Family Trait (Family Oriented, Nurturing)

List of Phases

There are a total of 28 phases total, with 5 available to toddlers, 21 available to children, and 28 available to teens. Once a phase is available, it will carry over into the next life stage. The phase names and the traits they add to sims are listed below:

Toddlers

Messy Phase (Slob)

Irritable Phase (Grumpy)

Certified Outdoor Hater Phase (Hates the Outdoors)

Restless Phase (Light Sleeper)

Clumsy Phase (Clumsy)

Children

Mean Streak Phase (Mean Spirited)

Distant Phase (Loner)

Clingy Phase (Shy)

Rebellious Phase (Rebellious)

Self-Absorbed Phase (Diva)

Sticky Fingers Phase (Kleptomaniac)

*Emotional Phase (Over Emotional)

Ill-Mannered Phase (Inappropriate)

Quick Temper Phase (Hot-Headed)

Anxious Phase (Neurotic)

Fearful Phase (Coward)

Lazy Phase (Couch Potato)

Erratic Phase (Insane)

Stoic Phase (No Sense of Humor)

Daydreamer Phase (Absent Minded)

Devious Phase (Evil)

*Shown in preview photos.

Teens

Loser Phase (Loser)

Materialistic Phase (Snob)

Emo Phase (Brooding)

Childish Phase (Childish)

Prudish Phase (Unflirty)

Noncommittal Phase (Commitment Issues)

Cringe Phase (Socially Awkward)

New Moodlets

There are 28 new moodlets, one for each phase, and all of them last for 2 days and have no effect on a sim’s mood.

Tuning

All of the tunable values can be found on the mod download page under the header “Tuning”.

Conflicts & Known Issues

Because this mod temporarily changes a sim’s traits, your sim may become unclickable if you also have Branndo10’s DrugLord mod installed at the same time. (Thank you to @monocodoll for the heads up!)

Otherwise, there shouldn’t be any conflicts.

Credits

EA/Maxis for The Sims 3 and The Sims 4, Visual Studio 2019, ILSpy, s3pe, Notepad++, Script Mod Template Creator, and deathbypufferfish for extracting the TS4 icons

If you like my work, please consider tipping me on Ko-fi 💙

Download @ ModTheSims

[base0h]

Sorry if I bother you or send you something a bit suck but I wanted to know if it was possible to you to do a hcs (or other forma, it doesn’t matter) with shanks and mihawk with a s/o who can copying everything (Haki, Mouvement, Physic, Devil power fruit, Everything) thanks to a rare Devil fruit..? Than you if you make it and sorry if it’s not corespondent to your blog or rules. 🐙

a/n - watch shanks fall in love with himself 💀 I added Law bec why not 💜

Warnings ⚠️ - g/n reader, s/o has copy copy no mi (copy fruit)

- At first, he thought this was some twisted nightmare where he met himself… “Oh god. It’s me.” He was so disgusted 😭 he was also so embarrassed whenever you copied his abilities, hearing you say “room” and “shambles” made him reconsider what he named his techniques. 💀

- “Room…” -law “SHAMBLES!” -you

- “excuse me y/n. It’s my attack.” Man was offended, you literally interrupted him lmfao 😂 he was all like: bitch don’t take away my spotlight it’s the only thing I have

- “But it’s cool when I get to say it!” He also hates the way his voice sounds now because of this. Overall, he’s very embarrassed of himself, so as a result, you do not use your ability around him much. BUT- he does appreciate it when the marines start targeting you instead of him 🤭

- “LAW. HELP!”

- “Huh? I’m not Law wdym?”

- “YOU EMO MOTHERFU- I WILL THROW AWAY YOUR GERMA 66 FIGURES.”

- “NO-!”

- (ahem, I will calm down)

- enjoys it but also REALLY hates it at the same time. Perona gets you two confused all the time, she’ll ask you where Mihawk’s wallet is and you have to remind her of your abilities. “HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHEN YOU BOTH LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME?!”

- “Scars on the back are a swordsman’s shame!” You said, holding Mihawk’s sword in front of a pirate who had tried to take over the island. Your physique and features were perfect, an amazing copy of Dracule Mihawk himself

- “Y/n, I do not say that. The young roronoa says that. If you do something, get it right.” He said, sipping his wine while reading a newspaper under his umbrella. You glared at the man, turning back into your normal self before shoving the pirate off the island with ease

- “Can you at least admit that I am literally a perfect copy of you-?”

- “No, because you’re not.”

- “Why are you so difficult?”

- “Why are you so talented in things that do not matter?”

- “…You think I’m talented? 😖🥹”

- shanks absolutely adores the fact that yo have this ability. It makes for amazing party tricks! Turn into Uta and sing a beautiful song? Easy. Turn into Rayleigh so you can scold him? Hell yeah.

- you turned into him one day, and he was impressed. With himself 💀 “Damn- I look good!” -_- You had enough of him looking at you and complimenting HIS looks. So you turned into Rayleigh, and that my friend, is how you get your red haired man to shut the fuck up.

- “Shanks, do the dishes before I punch you.”

- “Yes sir.”

- man is deathly afraid of Rayleigh’s punch- 🤪 so everytime he starts fo be rude in any way, you turn into Rayleigh, it always works! Except turning into the dark king isn’t exactly great for camouflage against marines.

- they ended up seeing you and chasing you around since you looked like Rayleigh. “I’m not Rayleigh! I’m y/n l/n of the red haired pirates!” They stopped in their tracks, “Y/N L/N! THE LEGENDARY PIRATE?! GET THEM!” That plan of yours severely backfired, they ended up calling reinforcements.

- “Rayleigh you need some help down there?” Shanks asked with the literal most smug grin on his face. You got the best idea, while the marines were confused, you turned into a random soldier to blend in. They then caught sight of shanks and started going after him instead. Man did not think to argue with you ever again.

- “Baby I’m sorry 😭 please don’t ignore me I need love.”

don’t give him hugs

a/n - I loved this idea sm 🤭

[dom1re]

mcs fav people and things 👀

perchance?

-@a-usernamelol

Alright i hope you're ready coz I got a lot of tmis for ya!!

Not sure Sunan has "favorite things"; he has an easy temperament and tends to like most things. The same goes with food, except he cant eat slimy stuff. He has a bad gag reflex

Another thing he can't stand is durian. A little backstory: Growing up Sunan didn't see much of his dad. The man was a travelling potioneer and spent a lot of time away from London, but always returned with exotic treats for his wife and son. Sunan liked most of them except for durians bc of the way they looked and smelled.

His dad kept encouraging him to try it but that backfired and made sunan's lil kiddie brain hate it forever (sometimes that's all it takes with kids 😂). I don't think his dad had bad intentions; he probably just wanted to share something he loved with his son that he didn't see v often

As for people... Sunan likes and gets along with most of his peers at Hogwarts. He's always had a crush on Sebastian so I guess that makes him his "fave." The poor thing got friendzoned tho so THERE GOES THAT DREAM🪦🪦😇😇😇

(guess you'll have to read my fic to find out 🤪)

Phew that's it, that's all my tmis. It's not every day I get asked about Sunan ok?? I gotta get it out of my system ok??? I had a lot of fun with this ask good stuff ty for ur interest clover!!

[pinklikeroses]

I really don’t like how one demential Stella is from helluva boss. She has the potential to be a really interesting complex character but is watered down to be a mean wife with zero development

I also don’t like how the show and the fans justify stolas’s cheating.

It’s terrible that he was forced to take part in an arranged marriage and that even though he made an effort to at least have a platonic or cordial relationship with Stella—

That she rebuffed his efforts and was a total asshole to him.

But no one deserves to be cheated on. I really hate how with a lot of media these days….characters both in canon and fandoms are written as black and white and aren’t given proper layers. And I think fandoms have ruined that. Like, you can still like a terrible character while acknowledging that they’re a terrible person without making shitty excuses for them

You can hate/ dislike a bad character without justifying all the terrible things that happened to them. I think the problem is ppl will give their faves or protagonist the benefit of the doubt or give them grace but characters we’re supposed to hate, that are written as bad, don’t deserve grace and patience and understanding

For some characters that’s true….some characters don’t deserve sympathy some characters don’t deserve redemption

But there’s a proper way to write it and I feel like creators and fans are missing that

Some of y’all already know how I feel about lore Olympus

It does a bad job of writing complex characters and holding the “bad” ones to a higher standard. So much so it backfires.

Minthe is one of the characters that was done SO dirty and was only put there to be an obstacle for hxp same as Demeter.

Minthe cheating on hades? Bad! Persephone persuing hades even after discovering he was already in an official relationship? That’s okay!

Because she’s our main protagonist! She’s nice! And not mean like that b*tch minthe!

Zeus cheating on Hera multiple times, with different women for decades? Bad! Zeus is a womanizing jerk who ditched his kids and mistreats his wife!

Hera cheats on Zeus by having an on again off again affair for freaking decades!?! That’s okay! Bc we love Hera! She supports hxp! She’s trying to set them up! She feels bad for poor poor hades! She’s constantly mistreated by her husband so that’s okay

Stolas was mistreated by Stella who was and is a terrible spouse but that doesn’t justify his cheating. I do feel bad for him sometimes. It sucks that the physical relationship he had for blitzo turned emotional and that he started having romantic feelings for him,only to get rejected time and time again. Stolas isn’t an entirely bad character we see multiple sides of him, he loves his daughter, he cares about blitzo he tried to do right by Stella. But even good characters can still do bad things.

And I don’t wanna hear “well they’re In hell lol 🤪” especially since we’ve seen multiple how monogamy and marriage are treated in this show. If the show is addressing how important it is..then it matters. If it didn’t it wouldn’t…..

It would’ve been nice to see that development and care be put into Stella instead of the classic hateful wife/spouse….

[chemzee]

Homies being homies

Just a silly, quick doodle

Sudden updated lore drop! Still marinating, still under reconstruction. So it's a bit foggy and I'm not sure if many stuff but here, since I got an opportunity ✨

Now that I've rewritten my own version of hpma story to follow my theory about how Daniel will bertray Elliot and will rat out NOTME, here's how it now goes:

Because Elliot suggested Daniel to join him, rather than NOTME in general, I believe Elliot isn't content with how things are in NOTME even though he seemingly holds a higher position there, if the Chinese first anniversary event is anything to judge by.

And with that, the rest of NOTME aren't exactly content of him either, especially the more loyal members and the actual leader. Elliot prefers to do things his way but he needed a partner in crime, which he found in Daniel. He perhaps often visits Hogwarts or Hogsmeade, even after graduation, so he could team up with Daniel when he needed him. So, he becomes less present/active in NOTME, which raises suspicions in the group. Some even suspect that he indeed has a new team or partner now, but without much evidence. One of the members, however, figures he could see if that's the case.

Daniel, on the other hand, agreed solely to get closer to NOTME and gather evidence against them. All of them, to rat every single one of them, this way, proving his mom has nothing to do with the organization. And while he didn't really get as close to NOTME as he wished (as in. not at all) he still managed to collect some evidence, but it wasn't enough, not until he meets at least one other member.

And the member showed up.

This part is bit blurry and needs to marinate but essentially, Daniel gets to meet Morgan (well, more so the other way around) and Daniel is aware that Morgan is part of NOTME, the same way Morgan knows Daniel is Elliot's new partner in crime. But the two, so far, don't rat each other out, Daniel because he wants to collect more evidence on other NOTME members and doesn't want to rat them out one by one but rather in groups/all together (bc if he didn't the group would sorta panic) and Morgan just doesn't see what benefits he could gain by telling other NOTME members about his being Elliot's helper, as he's primarily focused on his own gain in the group, not having much attachment/trust/respect for them.

While starting out tense,on Daniel's part mostly, the two end up, accidentally and surprisingly, striking a bit of a friendship, hanging out with other often until the two got rather close.

Which backfires against Daniel's original plan: rat NOTME out. Because before, he didn't care for any of the members. Now he does. He does care for one of them and he struggles to chose what to do, because he knows he can't just hide Morgan's identity and rat out the rest without him being revealed too at some point, no matter what he does, but neither is he willing to give up his revenge plan against NOTME, it's a lose-lose situation for him, a hard choice he struggles to make.

A part of me also believes Morgan, being a rather sharp individual with pretty good detective skills, has figured out Daniel's intentions and he knows that there's a possibility Daniel might rat him out, betraying him. And he... Doesn't know how to feel about it. On one hand, he doesn't want to go to Azkaban, obviously, especially not with his health. But on the other, he too, cares for Daniel a lot and he knows of the case about his mother, so he knows he's doing it for her and as someone who himself lost his family... He just wishes Daniel luck in reuniting with his mother and making things right, he genuinely wished Daniel happiness. He's just...not yet sure if he's willing to do so at his own expense. And he too, can't make a choice of whenever or not stopping him or letting him rat him out too.

So um. Here's that. Haha 🤪

[kibellah]

hiiii jules i stalked your ellie wexman tag because i'm ill 🤪 and i would like to blow her a kiss because she seems like coolest! i love all your aesthetic pics for her and wanted to know if you had more info about her or if you wrote about her anywhere? if not, are there any other cool details about her you'd be comfortable sharing? 🤗

BREEEEEEEEEE🫶🫶🫶🫶 tysm omg. i have not written ellie bc her voice eludes me </3 but i will drop some fun facts🫡🫡

-her full name is chanterelle. rook had an intense cooking with mushrooms phase and saw the word chanterelle and went "what a beautiful name for a baby girl <3" and was able to convince rebecca to have some whimsy and go along with it

-studied psychology in college!! wanted to become a therapist. took a year off after getting her bachelor's and then just never went back

-speaking of college, she dated bobby from second semester first year to first semester third year! so they were together awhile, which made the breakup sting quite a bit. they're on good terms now, since ellie gives people endless chances before she finally puts her foot down LMAO. she chose to let bobby keep his memories so hopefully that doesn't backfire😁

-HAS put her foot down with rebecca though! very bad relationship. absolutely terrible and not interested in fixing it😤😤😤 i think UB is really thrown off by the juxtaposition with how ellie treats everyone else versus how she treats her mom. the sniping at rebecca, or even flat out ignoring her. palpable tension between those two when they're in the same room!

-loves gardening, sewing, and embroidery. ellie setup a community garden she is very proud of, plus she offers her sewing + embroidery services to wayhaven residents free of charge :)

also her twc pinterest board 🤸🤸

[skippyv20]

I disagree that tonight is Harry's time to "shine" at the event award. It's going to be meghan's time to shine because she is a star and Hollywood loves her 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪. Meghan is a loser who didn't get an invite to the Golden Globes and they don't invite her to any major Hollywood event, so all WME could do is buy Harry an aviation award so Meghan the superstar 🤪🤪🤪 can have her "red carpet" moment this isn't about Harry it's always all about her. It's probably still going to be a huge PR disaster. It’s going to backfire.

His time to “shine”…was meant as “in his own mind”😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[irvingcoded]

I hate book irving and silna but I feel robbed we never see show silna and irving interact

man right?? especially given how the show still maintains irving's narrative connection and relative sympathies toward the surrounding netsilik people it's honestly such a waste! I would have loved to see them interact even just one scene, since it'd be decidedly Not Like The Book! like, even if irving wasn't deep repressed gay denial he's still just Big Repressed in general he isn't going to suddenly start acting inappropriate and horny just because there's a woman in proximity...... anyway, while I do mostly very much like how (and why) they adapted that arc for goodsir in the show instead of irving, it would have still been nice to hold onto a couple more things with irving I think. not the horny fuckboy shit obviously but the more meaningful moments of connection I guess.

irving in the show kind of suffers in general from a lack of introspection I think, in that we do get deeper and more internal insights to a lot of the main / supporting cast, quiet and intentionally revealing moments for us the viewers, but with him we're kind of denied a similar glimpse behind the curtain, aside from how the character is portrayed and interpreted by ronan raftery and the literal context of his scenes. which isnt to say there's not TONS of subtext because there definitely is, it's almost entirely nothing that was actually written into the scripts so I imagine it came later, maybe mainly via ronan's portrayal and how the actor chemistry unfolded which led to dave k's validation of that subtext that (unlike with most other characters!) was again very absent / lacking any significant detail in the transcripts.

and honestly I do think this actually mostly works for his character in particular, because even he is denying himself further insight into who he really is, BUT it definitely also backfires in the sense that so many ppl get blindsided by his actions in ep7, despite there definitely being scenes before that which do inform them, because we never get much access to his logic and process, whereas others you can almost see beat by beat as their opinions/feelings are evolving or changing. ALL THIS TO SAY even just one actual interaction with silna could have maybe helped somewhat bridge the narrative gap for all the people who are not obsessed with microanalysing every tiny crumb of irving content and details, perhaps... 🤪

and honestly irving aside, there is a lot a LOT of book silna content that imo would have been nice to keep or adapt at least. the book undoubtedly has its flaws and weaknesses and given the era of perspectives its being told through its hard to avoid that huge lens of bigotry but, the show could have still incorporated more of her scenes and character insight and even the deeper background of inuit lore but just ofc handled it more appropriately and accurately.

(that's also another thing for me how goodsir and irving never interact [onscreen] EITHER except ofc after irvings dead yet the character /narrative parallels are all over the place between both book AND show & not even limited to just the storyline transference!!!! arrrrrggghh... not that they interact much in the book either, I mean, but SINCE the show goes through so much trouble to have adapted and paralled the characters this way we could have gotten more from the show there too... all I'm sayin...)

[thesightstoshowyou]

Another thing that gets the Cricket copies killed:

When Asa actually pictures them in the house, touching Cricket's stuff and wearing her clothes, the fury he feels is immense, so he kills them for this imaginary disrespect.

When he's done, not even Asa himself can fully explain the logic behind his actions. Which would only make him more frustrated.

The cycle keeps cycling 🤪

He needs to just give it a rest for a while. Things are backfiring even in his imagination.

But he won’t 😭

[aethelredism]

choose violence: 1, 13, 24, 25

1. the character everyone gets wrong

Eadith 🥲

13. Worst blorboification

Eadith and Hild as the Cool Mom Friends who Take Care of the Boys 🤪

24. Topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

When the badly written show’s attempt at diversity and queer representation backfires and the fans desperately attempt to justify it looking at you especially Hirst

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

“Why did interesting female character have to have a fulfilling storyline? Why couldn’t she have settled down and married that some guy and had her storyline go nowhere?”

[kleinstar]

headcanon memes inspired by things i like, part 2. (ACCEPTING)

@penitentbeggar​ sent:  🍔👻🤪

what is your muse’s favourite food? is there a reason why they like it so much?

He doesn’t seem to have one and also says that as long as his stomach can take it he’s not picky, so there’s not any hated foods but nor are there any he seems to like over the other. Anything is good in good company after all ! 

does your muse have regrets? what are some of their deepest ones?

I guess he’d like to focus more on himself if he were to return to his home world. Other than that he might have some memories that have not been unlocked (we dont know by whom or how bc it doesnt seem to be rin that locked them as he seemed surprised eiden doesn’t ‘remember anything’) so there might be some. Maybe story will some day reach that point.

what is your muse’s sense of humour like? are they known for being joking, or serious?

He jokes around a lot and known to be more joking than serious. He likes to friendly tease people though he’s pretty cautious not to go overboard. Works with varying success and sometimes backfires on him  but yeah, he’s a tease (on all sorts of ways). 

He’s not like total funny guy with no serious side to him though it is something you could easily miss if you dont get to know him that well. And although he can go a little overboard or just be reckless he can be really levelheaded too.

[wosofanstuff]

You excited to be going back home? And what are you gonna miss the most about Australia?

That sounds good, fingers crossed that it‘ll work out for you this time🤞

You wanna hear a funny story? My next internship which starts next week, gave me a call yesterday and said something came up and I can‘t do it there😃

So now I had to find an alternative on extremely short notice, bit lucky for me, the Internship i did before my current one were pretty happy with my work there and said I could do it there if I wanted to. So I gave the Boss there a call and asked if I could do it there, and he told me he had to clear it with HR but they‘d be happy to have me again. So I sent him over the details and today I got the confirmation that I could do it there. Also happy about it because I don‘t have to introduce myself all over again and already know how they work so that’s hopefully gonna help me get settled quickly.

The first part sounds good, the second part a little crazy, but I get it😂

My current internship is, and to quote a classmate of mine: „Like a bad sitcom“

Like, the people that work there are all old, they all don‘t want to work anymore, and they all hate each other. Like none of them really give a fuck anymore besides their boss. She’s annoying and everybody hates her the most, like she takes 20 minutes to do 1 x-ray that even the 2. semesters would be able to do in 10 minutes. Like, that woman is just really aggravating. And I‘m saying that😭. I haven‘t even worked with her for more than a day and I don‘t get annoyed that easily.

I don‘t have much to do today. Probably gonna clean and wash some clothes, as well as cook. I went to the AC/DC concert last night, and while it was really cool it was kind of a fever dream.

Also my friends took a day of vacation for the concert but I couldn‘t cause we‘re not allowed to during two week internships, so I had to call in sick, what did my friends do? They were talking to one of our teachers and told her that we were going to the concert, so I really hope that doesn’t backfire and called in sick today as well to make sure it wasn‘t to suspicious🤪

What kind of question is that even?

Of course I‘m gonna be at the game, I am so freaking hyped💚🐺

Actually I‘m getting a season ticket as my birthday gift😁

Anyway, that got kind of long🤪

Have a good one

🩻

Don’t know to be honest it feels weird like all the people I meet here are few I will probs never see again and a good bunch only in a couple of years. But then obviously with moving and starting studying I’m kinda excited for that as well… so definitely mixed feelings

Dang that must have been so annoying, but definitely glad you found a solution and can save the awkward introduction part, it’s always the worst in a new place

Wait the place you go to now is not the same you as your current one right??? Because that sounds like one of those weird old doctor sitcoms

Dude not your friend 😭

But hope it did not backfire, but otherwise the concert was worth it right? 😂

Had to make sure. I’m so confused by the season ticket like they told me I paid two weeks before it actually came out of my account and like it’s gonna be a physical card I assume but when is it coming?!? ���

But definitely best birthday gift, did you get a good seat?

You too

[stellatescout]

gotta use this as my vent tool cause at least this just goes into the void

Now that I finally know exactly what is wrong with me and just how significantly I’ve been afflicted and I realize how much OCD has encompassed every grain of my being way more than I ever thought it’s even harder to talk about it. I try and I feel dismissed or crazy or misunderstood and it makes me want to hide even more. I don’t want to tell anyone I have it. It was almost easier when I thought I was just annoying. Which is the antithesis of what I need to be doing right now but I just don’t have the support system around me that I need or dream of. I just wanna slip back into the antisocial shit and leave everyone alone and be left alone. If no one is going to believe me or support me then why should I bother trying to seek any of it?

On the other hand I want to sit everyone down and explain why I am the way that I am and I finally understand and I need them to understand too and maybe now you can like me because there was a real reason behind strange or annoying or negative behavior. I never ever meant to be weird or bad or avoidant. It always felt like the harder I tried or the more I wanted to do good it backfired and I could never understand why. Everything I ever wanted was to be good and to feel like I belong and I’ve only failed over and over and over and over.

I think that’s why I like astrology so much. I wanted to understand myself and what was happening to me so badly so I could explain it all to others and maybe they could finally understand me too. How well that turned out. I’m so sad. What was the point of trying to diagnose my issues if it means that still nobody will love me enough to look past it and be patient with me? Not that I believe anyone should have to but I just wish. Maybe I’m meant to just be alone with my cats! Maybe that doesn’t sound so bad right now! I keep seeing things saying you’ll find your community, you’ll find people you feel you belong with, etc etc etc but when the fuck is it my turn? Maybe never! Maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be! 🤪

[candygirl33]

When being efficient backfires! 😂🤪