#but man i don't see a way out of any of this with the ssdi and our combined mental health shit

[the-firebird69]

So the max are going to make statues out of you with what you're doing really to represent what you're doing that's what the shield does and you can't even figure it out for Christ Jesus sake

Zues

You handed them all stans stuff and we hate you you're f****** assholes and you're fired you're just going to leave get the f*** out

Hera

The minority morlock are coming in is 300,000 here now taking the jobs of these queers and the fagina shows pretending these Garth quite unsuccessfully. Now there's a whole bunch of them coming in it's like 300,000 here and 300,000 are coming in and you people are 1.2 million and they've got 300,000 more coming this afternoon and they're going to have to find places to live and there's a bunch of them and they're going to do it 70% of Charlotte county's jobs surprised about 300,000 people 100% would be like 450,000 and they're getting ready for that and they're also going into Florida and they will have 60% today

You spend enough time on you people this morning already but you're begging for it

You're threatening to cut off the minority morlock SSI SSDI and Medicare which is for those who are poor but working and other such support systems not only in the United States but globally they're invading DC and Florida New York City and other centers for government and commerce and you're doing it today to stop you and your progress to help Tommy f is it too you're wrong and we're going to help out my son is happy with it it gets along with them most of the time except for Garth lol. So tough job when someone has to do it. One of the black guy hey man...

There's a lot of them coming in they don't want to hear this kind of stuff there's a son says to Ben Arnold. Yeah his character is getting free Hera and just a notify you and thank you very much for the morning good morning she says it's the warning I'm thinking before damn it. I'm going to make sure it doesn't happen you don't need to be flying anywhere. He said why you're funny somewhere I don't want to hear any more of this crap and said the men have to align when did twin powers activate and he said I'm not doing that stupid s*** form of a 747 not 7:37. Then Arnold hears it back Daddy says and he says it's a good idea they want to see your skin and you need one make sure we're talking to you it says once every 10 years is pretty good. I could use a radiation as opposed to what I used to say. But seriously they want to see him walk through and they want to see his bones look like see if anything is wrong density that kind of stuff and they want to see how it's health is and it's one way to get a scan without going to the stupid hospital they have to stand at tube just wondering where to fly to think of Utah He's thinking of flight of Tampa for Comic-Con. It's getting a little lazy but they have commuter airplanes to go there you spend like 3 hours the airport here and 3 hours in Tampa. But seriously it's a good idea good x-ray him and we need to document and we actually have to get that done so and he knows doesn't want to go to the hospital and we don't want him there there's reasons to get x-rayed other than the airport and we have one from the courthouse when he went it's kind of mild but it does show exactly what it is brain and they're after it they say and we're going to kill them all and that's another reason to do it and it's one reason why they don't want it and John remillard is going to get blamed for the skin and it's very clear. It looks fine there's no damage actually looks pristine and it's decent sized and yeah it feels this whole head it looks like his helmet it's just so weird and he's got nothing extra or nothing left out he has a sinus infection and it came up a little but not much and it's always there and just brain activity seems to be normal we can kind of tell the electrical current a minor amount of activity because of the stress other than that is fine the rest of his body looks normal. And he wants to get on Mac Daddy's we want to get on this and he says he wants to and it's motivation and they have the deep skin tube you stand in and that's if they suspect something they've been planted on you or you have metal in you and need to know about all that stuff and our son looks kind of really beefy so he's laughing cuz it's usually have the assholes do it and they have to reset the thing it's not easy to scan and it comes out funny so I think they can capture him using it

Thor Freya

[naamahdarling]

.

[flameontheotherside]

Anniversary...

I've been in a funk. I thought it was because of all the interactions with people outside of the home and talking to my grampa. Getting the official diagnosis for tourettes was great but it also upset me later on.

An alert on my phone brought to my attention that my anniversary with Erik will be in 2 days...April 17th 2017 (4/17/17) coincidentally 147 combinations have been my numbers to let me know I'm on my path when I become unsure. Those numbers were very reassuring while I was homeless so I trust those numbers literally with my life!

It was on that date I spoke to Erik for the first time.

He hadn't told me we were twin flames yet. We acted like friends. He asked questions about me like a therapist would actually. Honestly the concept of twin flames wasn't on my mind but the dreams were. The dreams where he was in them usually in bodies of water. Subconsciously I knew there was something there but I wasn't sure.

I couldn't have been sure about anything. I think when people are conceited or overly confident, they are full of themselves; to be actual full of shit. I learned really quickly that diving head first especially about tf matters when I actually did come around was stupid. I did the right thing to wait a couple months to make this blog but I was a complete idiot to have told anyone so soon on this journey.

I was forced to take a step back and I'm glad for it.

The people can still suck my left ovary though. 😆...Especially 5 years since I've provided a ton of information and grown from this experience. I have confidence and experience to match. Yet still I feel like a student. That there is still so much to learn.

To go back or look back at my first entries, I feel cringy. It's funny that I can see how my writing has changed! I was in my late 20s but felt like a child.

My handwritten journals aren't touched.

I should write more in them. Since Erik, I've not written too much but while I was homeless, I wrote a bit more because that was all I could do and I wanted to document by homeless journey by hand. It felt like the right thing to do. Since I've been here in Washington I've not written much.

In 2017 I had a crisis of faith. In the beginning I asked God to help me. I felt my intuition returning and I didn't know what to do with it. Suicidal, I begged that if God existed, he'd show me the way and he did. I secretly wanted my intuition to return for a few years. My dreams with Erik were picking up too.

One dream stood out from 2016.

I remembered it when I asked God for help. That dream was not like every other dream with Erik. He sang "please forgive me" to me in a river. I saw a marriage happening on the shore. I recognized it as the man and women from a twin flame website I laughed off a few years earlier. Forgive him for what and who is this guy who keeps showing up in my dreams? A psychic when I was little told me I'd meet my "soul mate" in or around a body of water (never dated anyone I met around any kind of body if water) and another psychic just before I chalked up the courage to talk to Erik told me that I should. How though?

All of this put me in a hole so I hospitalized myself on April 20 2017.

Erik still didn't tell me I was his Twin Flame. He didn't tell me for about another week. I thought I was going crazy. I wondered if I had made a mistake or if all of this was part of God's will. Please don't tell me what you think. If I wanted to know I'd ask. Whether or not it is, doesn't take away the fact I was put on this journey when I made it clear with God that he'd show me. This was his way. I know it is. I've been on this journey long enough to know. I established a relationship with God the moment I asked him to prove his existence and he did so in his way.

Everything I have from this apartment, great boyfriend, my growing collections, clothes, medications, my SSDI approval, all the money I got (14k), my doctors, my new bass guitars, my new bed and computer, all the material things I need and want came from him and my belief in him. He was the only consistent thing in my life (Erik's second) while I was at my lowest being homeless a full year. I felt most at home in the convent-type homeless shelters. Past life as a nun. I love the atmosphere and the word of God everywhere. I actually miss it! The women's shelter in Texas didn't provide the same quiet and biblical atmosphere. It was a little disappointing.

It's enough babling for tonight.

Meds are kicking in and I have to hook myself up to this sleep study thing for sleep apnea. I don't think I have it but my Dr insisted I do this because my bf has seen me stop breathing.

I was feeling down at the beginning of writing this and since I mentioned God, I feel better. Maybe a little emotional. I'm extremely lucky to have this experience and to be on this journey with Erik. I should be more thankful and less pissy about the fact Erik is dead because I really do drag my feet around and feel pitiful sometimes like today.

😘💕 Good night!

[the-firebird69]

So the max are going to make statues out of you with what you're doing really to represent what you're doing that's what the shield does and you can't even figure it out for Christ Jesus sake

Zues

You handed them all stans stuff and we hate you you're f****** assholes and you're fired you're just going to leave get the f*** out

Hera

The minority morlock are coming in is 300,000 here now taking the jobs of these queers and the fagina shows pretending these Garth quite unsuccessfully. Now there's a whole bunch of them coming in it's like 300,000 here and 300,000 are coming in and you people are 1.2 million and they've got 300,000 more coming this afternoon and they're going to have to find places to live and there's a bunch of them and they're going to do it 70% of Charlotte county's jobs surprised about 300,000 people 100% would be like 450,000 and they're getting ready for that and they're also going into Florida and they will have 60% today

You spend enough time on you people this morning already but you're begging for it

You're threatening to cut off the minority morlock SSI SSDI and Medicare which is for those who are poor but working and other such support systems not only in the United States but globally they're invading DC and Florida New York City and other centers for government and commerce and you're doing it today to stop you and your progress to help Tommy f is it too you're wrong and we're going to help out my son is happy with it it gets along with them most of the time except for Garth lol. So tough job when someone has to do it. One of the black guy hey man...

There's a lot of them coming in they don't want to hear this kind of stuff there's a son says to Ben Arnold. Yeah his character is getting free Hera and just a notify you and thank you very much for the morning good morning she says it's the warning I'm thinking before damn it. I'm going to make sure it doesn't happen you don't need to be flying anywhere. He said why you're funny somewhere I don't want to hear any more of this crap and said the men have to align when did twin powers activate and he said I'm not doing that stupid s*** form of a 747 not 7:37. Then Arnold hears it back Daddy says and he says it's a good idea they want to see your skin and you need one make sure we're talking to you it says once every 10 years is pretty good. I could use a radiation as opposed to what I used to say. But seriously they want to see him walk through and they want to see his bones look like see if anything is wrong density that kind of stuff and they want to see how it's health is and it's one way to get a scan without going to the stupid hospital they have to stand at tube just wondering where to fly to think of Utah He's thinking of flight of Tampa for Comic-Con. It's getting a little lazy but they have commuter airplanes to go there you spend like 3 hours the airport here and 3 hours in Tampa. But seriously it's a good idea good x-ray him and we need to document and we actually have to get that done so and he knows doesn't want to go to the hospital and we don't want him there there's reasons to get x-rayed other than the airport and we have one from the courthouse when he went it's kind of mild but it does show exactly what it is brain and they're after it they say and we're going to kill them all and that's another reason to do it and it's one reason why they don't want it and John remillard is going to get blamed for the skin and it's very clear. It looks fine there's no damage actually looks pristine and it's decent sized and yeah it feels this whole head it looks like his helmet it's just so weird and he's got nothing extra or nothing left out he has a sinus infection and it came up a little but not much and it's always there and just brain activity seems to be normal we can kind of tell the electrical current a minor amount of activity because of the stress other than that is fine the rest of his body looks normal. And he wants to get on Mac Daddy's we want to get on this and he says he wants to and it's motivation and they have the deep skin tube you stand in and that's if they suspect something they've been planted on you or you have metal in you and need to know about all that stuff and our son looks kind of really beefy so he's laughing cuz it's usually have the assholes do it and they have to reset the thing it's not easy to scan and it comes out funny so I think they can capture him using it

Thor Freya