#but that cranked that to 100% the whole way through

[vexx-the-egg]

How is no one talking about the GORGEOUSELY hand painted the backgrounds for The Boy and The Heron are. Every tiny detail. Every wisp of light streaming through the windows. All of it so beutiful rendered in water color. Like a children's book come to life. Look im all for glossy hyper relistic backgrounds but WOW. Wow did this movie remind you that all of that is a hand drawn craft. In the best way possible.

[megalophobic-astronomer]

sorry for giving up so early this year. i said id do an attack once every three days max and i have done Six. i didnt really give up i kinda just only like revenging lol and i havent been attacked since the beginning

[mostlysignssomeportents]

This is your brain on fraud apologetics

In 1998, two Stanford students published a paper in Computer Networks entitled “The Anatomy of a Large-Scale Hypertextual Web Search Engine,” in which they wrote, “Advertising funded search engines will be inherently biased towards the advertisers and away from the needs of consumers.”

https://research.google/pubs/pub334/

If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/24/passive-income/#swiss-cheese-security

The co-authors were Lawrence Page and Sergey Brin, and the “large-scale hypertextual web search-engine” they were describing was their new project, which they called “Google.” They were 100% correct — prescient, even!

On Wednesday night, a friend came over to watch some TV with us. We ordered out. We got scammed. We searched for a great local Thai place we like called Kiin and clicked a sponsored link for a Wix site called “Kiinthaila.com.” We should have clicked the third link down (kiinthaiburbank.com).

We got scammed. The Wix site was a lookalike for Kiin Thai, which marked up their prices by 15% and relayed the order to our local, mom-and-pop, one-branch restaurant. The restaurant knew it, too — they called us and told us they were canceling the order, and said we could still come get our food, but we’d have to call Amex to reverse the charge.

As it turned out, the scammers double-billed us for our order. I called Amex, who advised us to call back in a couple days when the charge posted to cancel it — in other words, they were treating it as a regular customer dispute, and not a systemic, widespread fraud (there’s no way this scammer is just doing this for one restaurant).

In the grand scheme of things, this is a minor hassle, but boy, it’s haunting to watch the quarter-century old prophecy of Brin and Page coming true. Search Google for carpenters, plumbers, gas-stations, locksmiths, concert tickets, entry visas, jobs at the US Post Office or (not making this up) tech support for Google products, and the top result will be a paid ad for a scam. Sometimes it’s several of the top ads.

This kind of “intermediation” business is actually revered in business-schools. As Douglas Rushkoff has written, the modern business wisdom reveres “going meta” — not doing anything useful, but rather, creating a chokepoint between people who do useful things and people who want to pay for those things, and squatting there, collecting rent:

https://rushkoff.medium.com/going-meta-d42c6a09225e

It’s the ultimate passive income/rise and grind side-hustle: It wouldn’t surprise me in the least to discover a whole festering nest of creeps on Tiktok talking about how they pay Mechanical Turks to produce these lookalike sites at scale.

This mindset is so pervasive that people running companies with billions in revenue and massive hoards of venture capital run exactly the same scam. During lockdown, companies like Doordash, Grubhub and Uber Eats stood up predatory lookalike websites for local restaurants, without their consent, and played monster-in-the-middle, tricking diners into ordering through them:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/09/19/we-are-beautiful/#man-in-the-middle

These delivery app companies were playing a classic enshittification game: first they directed surpluses to customers to lock them in (heavily discounting food), then they directed surplus to restaurants (preferential search results, free delivery, low commissions) — then, having locked in both consumers and producers, they harvested the surplus for themselves.

Today, delivery apps charge massive premiums to both eaters and restaurants, load up every order with junk fees, and clone the most successful restaurants out of ghost kitchens — shipping containers in parking lots crammed with low-waged workers cranking out orders for 15 different fake “virtual restaurants”:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/12/01/autophagic-buckeyes/#subsidized-autophagia

Delivery apps speedran the enshittification cycle, but Google took a slower path to get there. The company has locked in billions of users (e.g. by paying billions to be the default search on Safari and Firefox and using legal bullying to block third party Android device-makers from pre-installing browsers other than Chrome). For years, it’s been leveraging our lock-in to prey on small businesses, getting them to set up Google Business Profiles.

These profiles are supposed to help Google distinguish between real sellers and scammers. But Kiin Thai has a Google Business Profile, and searching for “kiin thai burbank” brings up a “Knowledge Panel” with the correct website address — on a page that is headed with a link to a scam website for the same business. Google, in other words, has everything it needs to flag lookalike sites and confirm them with their registered owners. It would cost Google money to do this — engineer-time to build and maintain the system, content moderator time to manually check flagged listings, and lost ad-revenue from scammers — but letting the scams flourish makes Google money, at the expense of Google users and Google business customers.

Now, Google has an answer for this: they tell merchants who are being impersonated by ad-buying scammers that all they need to do is outbid them for the top ad-spot. This is a common approach — Amazon has a $31b/year “ad business” that’s mostly its own platform sellers bidding against each other to show you fake results for your query. The first five screens of Amazon search results are 50% ads:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/28/enshittification/#relentless-payola

This is “going meta,” so naturally, Meta is doing it too: Facebook and Instagram have announced a $12/month “verification” badge that will let you report impersonation and tweak the algorithm to make it more likely that the posts you make are shown to the people who explicitly asked to see them:

https://www.vox.com/recode/2023/2/21/23609375/meta-verified-twitter-blue-checkmark-badge-instagram-facebook

The corollary of this, of course, is that if you don’t pay, they won’t police your impersonators, and they won’t show your posts to the people who asked to see them. This is pure enshittification — the surplus from users and business customers is harvested for the benefit of the platform owners:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/21/potemkin-ai/#hey-guys

The idea that merchants should master the platforms as a means of keeping us safe from their impersonators is a hollow joke. For one thing, the rules change all the time, as the platforms endlessly twiddle the knobs that determine what gets shown to whom:

https://doctorow.medium.com/twiddler-1b5c9690cce6

And they refuse to tell anyone what the rules are, because if they told you what the rules were, you’d be able to bypass them. Content moderation is the only infosec domain where “security through obscurity” doesn’t get laughed out of the room:

https://doctorow.medium.com/como-is-infosec-307f87004563

Worse: the one thing the platforms do hunt down and exterminate with extreme prejudice is anything that users or business-customers use to twiddle back — add-ons and plugins and jailbreaks that override their poor choices with better ones:

https://www.theverge.com/2022/9/29/23378541/the-og-app-instagram-clone-pulled-from-app-store

As I was submitting complaints about the fake Kiin scam-site (and Amex’s handling of my fraud call) to the FTC, the California Attorney General, the Consumer Finance Protection Bureau and Wix, I wrote a little Twitter thread about what a gross scam this is:

https://twitter.com/doctorow/status/1628948906657878016

The thread got more than two million reads and got picked up by Hacker News and other sites. While most of the responses evinced solidarity and frustration and recounted similar incidents in other domains, a significant plurality of the replies were scam apologetics — messages from people who wanted to explain why this wasn’t a problem after all.

The most common of these was victim-blaming: “you should have used an adblocker” or “never click the sponsored link.” Of course, I do use an ad-blocker — but this order was placed with a mobile browser, after an absentminded query into the Google search-box permanently placed on the home screen, which opens results in Chrome (where I don’t have an ad-blocker, so I can see material behind an ad-blocker-blocker), not Firefox (which does have an ad-blocker).

Now, I also have a PiHole on my home LAN, which blocks most ads even in a default browser — but earlier this day, I’d been on a public wifi network that was erroneously blocking a website (the always excellent superpunch.net) so I’d turned my wifi off, which meant the connection came over my phone’s 5G connection, bypassing the PiHole:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/04/28/shut-yer-pi-hole/

“Don’t click a sponsored link” — well, the irony here is that if you habitually use a browser with an ad-blocker, and you backstop it with a PiHole, you never see sponsored links, so it’s easy to miss the tiny “Sponsored” notification beside the search result. That goes double if you’re relaxing with a dinner guest on the sofa and ordering dinner while chatting.

There’s a name for this kind of security failure: the Swiss Cheese Model. We all have multiple defenses (in my case: foreknowledge of Google’s ad-scam problem, an ad-blocker in my browser, LAN-wide ad sinkholing). We also have multiple vulnerabilities (in my case: forgetting I was on 5G, being distracted by conversation, using a mobile device with a permanent insecure search bar on the homescreen, and being so accustomed to ad-blocked results that I got out of the habit of checking whether a result was an ad).

If you think you aren’t vulnerable to scams, you’re wrong — and your confidence in your invulnerability actually increases your risk. This isn’t the first time I’ve been scammed, and it won’t be the last — and every time, it’s been a Swiss Cheese failure, where all the holes in all my defenses lined up for a brief instant and left me vulnerable:

https://locusmag.com/2010/05/cory-doctorow-persistence-pays-parasites/

Other apologetics: “just call the restaurant rather than using its website.” Look, I know the people who say this don’t think I have a time-machine I can use to travel back to the 1980s and retrieve a Yellow Pages, but it’s hard not to snark at them, just the same. Scammers don’t just set up fake websites for your local businesses — they staff them with fake call-centers, too. The same search that takes you to a fake website will also take you to a fake phone number.

Finally, there’s “What do you expect Google to do? They can’t possibly detect this kind of scam.” But they can. Indeed, they are better situated to discover these scams than anyone else, because they have their business profiles, with verified contact information for the merchants being impersonated. When they get an ad that seems to be for the same business but to a different website, they could interrupt the ad process to confirm it with their verified contact info.

Instead, they choose to avoid the expense, and pocket the ad revenue. If a company promises to “to organize the world’s information and make it universally accessible and useful,” I think we have the right to demand these kinds of basic countermeasures:

https://www.google.com/search/howsearchworks/our-approach/

The same goes for Amex: when a merchant is scamming customers, they shouldn’t treat complaints as “chargebacks” — they should treat them as reports of a crime in progress. Amex has the bird’s eye view of their transaction flow and when a customer reports a scam, they can backtrack it to see if the same scammer is doing this with other merchants — but the credit card companies make money by not chasing down fraud:

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/rosalindadams/mastercard-visa-fraud

Wix also has platform-scale analytics that they could use to detect and interdict this kind of fraud — when a scammer creates a hundred lookalike websites for restaurants and uses Wix’s merchant services to process payments for them, that could trigger human review — but it didn’t.

Where do all of these apologetics come from? Why are people so eager to leap to the defense of scammers and their adtech and fintech enablers? Why is there such an impulse to victim-blame?

I think it’s fear: in their hearts, people — especially techies — know that they, too, are vulnerable to these ripoffs, but they don’t want to admit it. They want to convince themselves that the person who got scammed made an easily avoidable mistake, and that they themselves will never make a similar mistake.

This is doubly true for readerships on tech-heavy forums like Twitter or (especially) Hacker News. These readers know just how many vulnerabilities there are — how many holes are in their Swiss cheese — and they are also overexposed to rise-and-grind/passive income rhetoric.

This produces a powerful cognitive dissonance: “If all the ‘entrepreneurs’ I worship are just laying traps for the unwary, and if I am sometimes unwary, then I’m cheering on the authors of my future enduring misery.” The only way to resolve this dissonance — short of re-evaluating your view of platform capitalism or questioning your own immunity to scams — is to blame the victim.

The median Hacker News reader has to somehow resolve the tension between “just install an adblocker” and “Chrome’s extension sandbox is a dumpster fire and it’s basically impossible to know whether any add-on you install can steal every keystroke and all your other data”:

https://mattfrisbie.substack.com/p/spy-chrome-extension

In my Twitter thread, I called this “the worst of all possible timelines.” Everything we do is mediated by gigantic, surveillant monopolists that spy on us comprehensively from asshole to appetite — but none of them, not a 20th century payment giant nor a 21st century search giant — can bestir itself to use that data to keep us safe from scams.

Next Thu (Mar 2) I'll be in Brussels for Antitrust, Regulation and the Political Economy, along with a who's-who of European and US trustbusters. It's livestreamed, and both in-person and virtual attendance are free:

https://www.brusselsconference.com/registration

On Fri (Mar 3), I'll be in Graz for the Elevate Festival:

https://elevate.at/diskurs/programm/event/e23doctorow/

[Image ID: A modified version of Hieronymus Bosch's painting 'The Conjurer,' which depicts a scam artist playing a shell-game for a group of gawking rubes. The image has been modified so that the scam artist's table has a Google logo and the pea he is triumphantly holding aloft bears the 'Sponsored' wordmark that appears alongside Google search results.]

[son-of-rap-bear-art]

So, do y'all remember the Adventure Time Mash-Up Pack for Minecraft back in like, 2017? Me and some friends have been messing around with that map lately and revamping some of the areas we consider a bit lacking with creative mode, and for me that was the Treehouse! I got ~100 reference pics from various episodes and tried to put it all together into the most autistically accurate Treehouse I could, and I wanna share it here cause I'm really proud of it!

Feel free to skip the text and just look at the pretty pictures. Cause when I say "autistically accurate" I MEAN IT. It's MY blog and I get to choose the special interest. :p

The exterior is mostly unchanged from the official map, but I added the orange tree from My Two Favorite People, and the pond. Also the log where Finn sits and thinks in Gotcha!

Yes, I will be mentioning specific episodes like this often.

I didn't make the Grotto, because I'm not THAT crazy, but I did make the pond really deep and filled it with the sort of things you see when Finn swims down there in Beyond the Grotto.

The first thing you see when you actually go inside is the treasure room, of course! The official map's treasure room is so small and sad, but I made it more accurate to how it looks in the show, with a ton of ladders and platforms going upwards until you get to the kitchen.

Speaking of, at this point I should show the layout I based the rooms' positions on...

I put this together myself and I THINK it's the most consistently accurate layout... of course, it's a cartoon, sometimes you'll get stuff like the bathroom in the left branch for the sake of a gag in Dentist, and characters will frequently run offscreen and then teleport to another room, BUT this is what I observed to be the most common layout seen when the camera will actually follow the characters through doors and ladders and etc.

Interestingly, the ladder in the trunk actually seems to connect to the kitchen, which is HIGHER than the living room, and then you have to go down a separate ladder to get to the living room. Confusing! But it checks out.

So yeah, climbing up past the treasure room takes you right to the kitchen! Some specific details to call out here are: - The picture of PB with the two spatulas is from Abstract, and I painted it myself in-game via a mod! Unfortunately I didn't get around to other paintings yet, they're a bit annoying to make. - The urn supposedly containing Margaret's ashes, from Conquest of Cuteness, is on one of the shelves. - There isn't a single torch in this whole build! It's carefully lit up with candles, just like the Treehouse should be! - There's actually this easily missable tiny room connected to the kitchen, seen in the last pic, that has another trapdoor and also the door to the bathroom. I believe that first shows up in Incendium and then stays around forever. - The cooler is entirely full of eggs, like how Finn exclusively buys pre-boiled eggs when grocery shopping without Jake, in Temple of Mars.

The bathroom! Funnily enough, the bathroom might be the least consistent room in the whole Treehouse. It's just made up of a toilet, bathtub, and sink, but these three things shuffle around the room entirely at random from episode to episode. In this sort of situation, I consider the most accurate way to handle it to be the same as the show: just put them wherever! So I did that.

That door in the kitchen leads to this room, connected by a bridge. I just called it the "bucket room" because it has a bucket that Finn and Jake ride in in Rainy Day Daydream, although that episode has a pretty wacky Treehouse in general.

I hooked up a hand crank with the Create mod, so you can use it like an elevator kinda.

Down the other ladder in the kitchen gets you to, the living room! This room's just a small round circle in some episodes, but others have it a bit bigger.

That bookshelf is there in Jake Suit, and has Dream Journal of a Boring Man, Vol 12 on it. Since one of the decor mods I'm using lets me place down books, I copied the 3 excerpts we get to see from it down into a written book, so it's even actually there!

A really inconsistent aspect of the living room is this weird platform with a door. I can only remember it appearing in In Your Footsteps and Three Buckets, but maybe I've just always missed it? I made it lead back into the trunk, so you can use it as a shortcut up to the kitchen.

Also over here is this workbench, which to my knowledge suddenly shows up in season 8 and becomes a REALLY REALLY consistent part of the living room?? Seriously, it's in Two Swords, Horse and Ball, Abstract... It's suddenly all over the place!! But I genuinely can't recall it existing before that. Am I crazy or is this an actual thing?

Anyway, connected by bridge to the living room is the den! Surprisingly, even though it barely even shows up in any episodes, the den is SUPER messy and lived in. I tried to reflect this by jamming as many decorative blocks as I could in there.

Also for some reason this fireplace doubles as a pizza oven in Abstract? Yeah, Abstract's got a really silly Treehouse. But it was easy enough to slot in there, so I did!

Way back to the kitchen and upwards: the bedroom! I always thought the bedroom was so tiny and cramped, but a good few episodes actually show it as pretty spacious! I tried to hit a good balance.

The pictures hung up around Finn's bed are a blurry, badly taken picture of Huntress Wizard, and a clearly old picture of Flame Princess. They're both cute choices for Finn's future, and are my girlfriends' respective favorite characters, so I included both :D

I also included the attic, which as far I know ONLY appears in Dad's Dungeon. I think it's neat, though, so I put it here. It'll be nice for survival mode storage.

If you exit through the attic, you can get to the cloud that Finn and Jake have tied down for its rainwater. The dripstone on the underside looks a bit ugly, but it makes it functional! If you scoop water out of any of the cauldrons with a bucket, it'll slowly refill with water from the cloud!

We're nearing the end! Here's a back shot of things. I added the power lines, Neptr's cave, and the farm. For some reason, Holly Jolly Secrets has a second, distinct set of powerlines, but those would be ugly so I didn't include them.

Lastly, the chicken coop, as seen in BMO Noire and mentioned in Three Buckets, featuring Lorraine. Who looks like Boobafina in this texture pack, which is silly.

I'm... honestly not very satisfied with the coop's placement, as BMO Noire shows it being out on a rarely-seen branch, but this is the best I could do without a major facelift on the tree itself.

So, yeah! That's the image limit. There's a good few extra details scattered around here and there, but I'll leave it at that. I hope this is as fun to read as it was for me to write :D

[meownotgood]

♡ on cam / hayakawa aki ♡

♡ kinktober 2022 ♡

pairing: hayakawa aki x fem!reader

word count: 1.7k

content: camgirl reader, soft dom aki, lots of praise, toys, exhibitionism, your boyfriend fucks you in front of all your viewers

this work contains explicit content intended for 18+ individuals. please read the tags and do not interact if you are a minor.

"Look at you — So pretty, baby. Everyone thinks you're so pretty." 

"Shit… I think they saw me." 

bunnyy34: OMG HIS FACE 

demonic_6: so handsome woww 

pochit4: holy shit he's hot 

pochit4: is that ur boyfriend????? 

Aki leans backward, adjusting your laptop on the bed, tilting the camera. He turns his attention back towards you once he's made sure the view is perfect. He presses the glittery pink vibrator to your clit firmer, then leans down. His voice is sultry, barely more than a whisper when he mutters into your ear, "Does it feel good, baby?" 

"Yeah, yeah," You mumble, your legs quivering, your whole body tense from the pleasure. Aki grabs your thigh with his free hand to steady you, rubbing in circles with his palm, then gently squeezing the soft flesh. 

Between his deep gaze locked on yours, his warm touch, his voice — You're doing so well for me, I love showing you off to everyone like this — the thought in your head that hundreds of people are watching you get off, and the buzz of the vibrator between your legs increasing as he cranks it up a level… It's hard to speak, or hell, even think. The only thing you're able to stammer out is, "Please, please, need you." 

"Fuck, I need you too," Aki cups your face; his palm is warm, and you whine when he drags the ridges of the vibrator against your clit. He sounds just as desperate as you, maybe even more so. "You want me to fuck you? In front of all these people?" 

Of course you want him to fuck you. This was your idea, after all. You're the one who begged Aki to make an appearance on your camgirl stream, who promised him you were sure it'd bring in loads of donations. He's always willing to help in your livestream endeavors, but he was hesitant about being on them himself. I'm sure they don't wanna see me. They just wanna see you, pretty girl. 

kon_1990 tipped $100!

kon_1990: please fuck her already 

bunnyy34: she's so fucking cute 

dev1lhunter: damn he's lucky 

dev1lhunter: bet he gets to stick his dick in her whenever he wants to 

Well, Aki has to admit a few things: One, that he assumed wrong, because your chat seems to really get a kick out of seeing the both of you. And two, that he enjoys this way, way more than he thought he would. 

Honestly, there's something about playing with you in front of all of these people, seeing the comments they make, and knowing he's the only one who gets to fuck you that has him whipped. He's the only one who gets to touch you, and he damn well knows he can make you feel better than any toy can. 

Aki's gonna have you screaming his name for your whole audience, he's sure of it. 

"Tell me," Aki commands when you don't answer, his words shaking ever-so slightly. He swallows before he speaks again, "I need you to tell me what you want. Tell me how you want me to fuck you in front of everyone." 

"Yeah, 'course I want you to…" You beg through broken gasps, hardly able to speak as Aki doesn't let up with the vibrator against you. You're so sensitive, so wet; you can feel the way your thighs are soaked, how you're dripping out onto the sheets. "Want all of them to see."

Aki's eyes flicker to check the laptop screen for a moment, and when they do, his gaze lingers, a little smirk forming on his face as he reads what your chat is saying. He addresses your chat directly, his voice taking on that familiar, serious tone: "I can fuck her better than good. She's gonna cum on my dick harder than she does on any of her little toys." 

ea5yrev3nge tipped $30! 

ea5yrev3nge: I'll tip 200 if u show us how good u can fuck her 

angelicaura: aye I got here late what's happening 

bunnyy34: topknotluvr is gonna get fucked by her bf lol 

His hand moves to your chin, where he carefully grabs your face and tilts you towards him, forcing you to look at him. He asks, "Isn't that right?" 

You're already lost in the moment, in the pleasure on your clit and the way he's so unexpectedly into this. His gaze is deep enough to drown in, his eyelashes heavy. You babble, "Right, right…" 

Aki pulls the vibrator away and finally clicks it off. He tosses it to the side on the bed and reaches for the laptop, adjusting it again. This has to be perfect. He needs everyone to get the most perfect view when he fucks you, when he puts his cock inside you. God, the thought of it alone, of everyone seeing and watching and knowing that you're his — It makes him feel lightheaded, and Aki quickly fumbles to pull down his sweats and his boxers to free his stiffening cock.

He grabs your hip to pull you in closer, and the head of his cock throbs when you feel it nudging your entrance. It's pretty and thick, certainly enough for your viewers to ogle at, and he's already so hard, dribbling sticky precum over the shaft. He wraps his hand around it, giving your audience a bit of a show as his nimble fingers pump his cock, palm swiping over the tip to get it wet. He's been waiting for this just as long as you have, practically aching to be inside you. 

demonic_6: omfg 

_futurerules: can she even take that 

snowball97 tipped $125! 

"Spread your legs wider for me, baby," Aki commands breathlessly, and then affirms, right after, "There you go. Good girl. I want everyone to see how you take me." 

He settles his hands on your waist, adjusting your hips a bit more before he presses inside. He gasps, breath hitching as he buries his dick in further, muttering something you hardly catch, something like, So tight. Slowly, he fills you, letting your viewers see how you take every inch of his cock. When he's all the way in, his hips flush with yours, he groans, his head falling to your shoulder. 

You tangle your fingers in his soft hair as he starts to fuck you. Nice and slow, allowing everyone to watch the way his cock stretches you each time he presses in, the way your cunt grips him every time he pulls out, the shaft glistening with your slick, with how wet you are. 

Aki acknowledges it, speaking quietly into your ear, voice strained and trembling, "So wet for me, God..." 

"Hah, s-shit," Aki stammers, and his eyes flicker to the laptop screen for another brief moment. He presses his soft lips to your neck, then to the shell of your ear, and finally whispers, "They want me to fuck you harder, sweetheart. You can take it, yeah?" 

demonic_6 tipped $75! 

demonic_6: fuck her harder 

dev1lhunter: im gonna cum already 

"Uh-huh, please," You babble, nodding your head feverishly. 

"That's my girl." 

As soon as the words leave his mouth, Aki is wasting no time fucking you harder, burying his cock in deeper, giving you more. It's so messy and sloppy, your thighs soaked. Your room is filled with the obscene, wet sound made as he fucks you, your quiet moans, and his shaky breaths. You wrap your legs around his back, pulling him in even closer. 

You've been so caught up in the moment that you almost forgot how everyone is watching. All your viewers and adoring fans: their eyes are on you as you get fucked by your boyfriend, by Aki. The thought alone makes your heart flutter and your cunt tighten around him.

You mumble his name, desperately, "Aki- Don't stop." 

"God, baby," Aki groans, voice bordering on a whine; it's hard for him to speak now, too. "Say it louder. I want all of them to hear you."

bunnyy34: did anyone catch that???? 

angelicaura: cute 

snowball97: oh my god was that his name 

So you oblige, chanting his name over and over again, louder and louder — Aki, Aki, Aki — even though your voice has gone weak and hoarse, words fraying at the edges. Aki finds your hand, intertwines his fingers with yours and squeezes tight. 

His moans are becoming noisier, more needy, his heart skipping a beat and his cock throbbing every time you say his name; he places hurried, messy kisses to the nape of your neck to shut himself up. You can feel his breath fanning out over your skin, warm every time he gasps for air. 

Although he's overwhelmed, Aki focuses his attention on pleasing you; he finds your sweet spot, like he always does, hitting it with every thrust into you, until your eyes threaten to roll into the back of your head and you end up squeezing his hand back even tighter. You're getting close, feeling a knot of tension grow in your core, and your words slur when you beg, "Really close, Aki please. Wanna cum for you-" 

"Yeah? Oh, babygirl," Aki falters for a moment, his pace growing ragged, more desperate as he approaches his own high. "I'm close — Gonna cum with you, let everyone hear how pretty you sound when you cum for me." 

You fall apart for him then, your legs squirming where they're held over his back. Your cunt pulses, squeezing his cock tighter, and he can't hold back; Aki rides the same high as you, fucking you messily through your orgasm, spilling his cum deep inside, his cock twitching and throbbing from the aftershock.

You're chanting his name over and over, and he's saying your name in unison, under his breath, quiet enough so only you are able to hear. "You did so well, you're okay," He whispers, "Just breathe." 

Aki gives you a moment to relax before he pushes himself off of you, brushing his messy hair from his face. He asks, "Want me to turn off the stream now?" And when you nod, he's reaching for your laptop. 

ea5yrev3nge tipped $200! 

angelicaura tipped $170! 

_futurerules tipped $50! 

_futurerules: that was so hot 

bunnyy34: does anyone know if he's gonna be on her next stream?? 

kon_1990: I hope so 

demonic_6: probably, I think she made it to the front page 

You peer up at him, his eyes glinting and earrings shining in the low light of the laptop screen. You ask, "How did it go? Did they like it?" 

"Yeah, baby… Wow. So many donations," Aki closes the browser, shutting the laptop, turning back towards you with a little smile on his face. "How about I take you on a shopping spree tomorrow — What do you think?" 

[brother-emperors]

how long do you typically spend drawing a comic page? I'm a perfectionist and I have a hard time keeping a reasonable working pace for comics

so I’m actually going to not answer this one (the answer is both less and more time than people think, and it depends) but instead I’m going to give you some advice on how to deal with perfectionism when it comes to making comics

the first thing is to see if you can kill your inner perfectionist, which basically means, can you get comfortable with imperfections? this is something that can be difficult to do, but it can also really take some weight off your shoulders if you can look at a line that’s a little squiggly instead of perfectly smooth and move on from it. there’s a whole page, a single wonky line, is like. fine, especially if you’re doing more than one page.

if not, that’s okay! we’re moving on to the 75%-80% rule, which is: figure out what giving 100% in art looks like for you, then find out what giving 70%-80% looks like. As a person, you can probably consistently give 80% to any given illustration, but doing 100% all the time is going to fuck you up in the long run. If you can get comfortable consistently giving a 80%, you can then decide when you want to crank it up for dramatic effect, or you can save going all in on something fun or a big project. if perfectionism is a hard habit to break, instead try it reframe it as giving a ‘perfect’ 80% instead of 100. it’s all about that overall visual consistency, baby!

comics can feel like doing seven or eight individual illustrations on a page (panels) and some people definitely tackle them this way, and that makes learning what you can consistently give without wanting to shove your hands into cement very important. If every panel is a solid 80%, the entire page looks Good (which means the entire page is working at 100% because you have visual consistency/coherency and that’s what matters)

ideally, you reach a point where you can gauge what a good 80% of what you can give looks like across an entire sequence. for me, Trikaranos is operating at 80% while Ex Voto is 70% (part of it is that Trikaranos is more demanding, while Ex Voto is more casual and vibes based, but for both I put a lot more work into formatting and lettering)

part of what can help with all of this is figuring out a good work pipeline that encourages finishing up a sequence to keep you from getting stuck agonizing on small details

a decent one is this

thumbnails > rough pencils > do tight pencils where you think you’ll need it (I do tight pencils on facial expressions, furniture if there are bodies on it, and perspective shots) > inks > colors > lettering

adjust it based on whatever your own needs are, etc.

what’s imperative to this is that you don’t do the pencils > inks > coloring stages in sequential order, but instead jump around so that you don’t burn your energy through it (in that there’s a drop in quality as you either get tired or start to rush). Jumping around lets you spread out your high energy points and it picks up the slack for when you want to just get it done, but also it forcibly keeps you from spending too much time on one specific thing. (which is why breaking it up into stages is important, instead something like finishing one whole page from pencils to colors and then doing the next one)

when I do single page comics, I usually alternate every other panel, when I do multi page comics, I’ll either alternate entire pages or I’ll do the first and last pages at the start, and then jump around the middle in whatever order I feel like.

whenever I find myself spending too much time on something, I will set a playlist that has either a 15 minute or half hour run time, and when I reach the last song, if I’m still fucking around focusing on one thing, I’ll make myself move in and return to it later. I do this the most with the inking stage so that I don’t over ink something (I find crosshatching relaxing, but it doesn’t often look good because I do too much in one place and it looks bad because it doesn’t work with the rest of the panels and then I have to start over), and then I can go back to a panel with fresh eyes later and decide whether or not more detail is necessary for the whole page to look good, or if it’s fine as is.

and ofc, the most important guideline of all: the Fuck It, We’re Done rule, which is at some point, you may look at a page and go ‘I don’t want to work on this any more, I’m tired, it’s not fun, I’ll be stuck here forever, etc’ and that’s when you put your pencil down, physically move back from the page, and figure out what the bare minimum amount of work you need to do in order for the whole page to be coherent is, do JUST THAT, and post it.

at the end of the day, it’s the whole page that’s important, not all the individual details, so try not to focus on too many small details early on, but instead go back and add them in closer to the end. You can clean up any line art mistakes that are bothering you here at this stage too.

finally, don’t zoom in too close on a digital canvas, especially if you’re doing pencils. there’s no reason for a reader to zoom in close like that unless you specifically want them too, spare your hands the agony of tiny details that won’t be seen when you upload it at viewer resolutions. I know artists who won’t go past 150% because those details won’t show up at print resolutions.

HEUGHGHHH this is so so long, but hopefully there is some helpful advice in there for you, anon

[year2000electronics]

Actually, I have a lot of questions about your Supernu-trollau.

1 does Bruce still have a family with Brandy?

2 does Branch get close to his brothers just because he wants to get to know them or also because of guilt for what his parents put them through?

3 When Clay decided to leave and find Branch was there any problem with that? I mean, he's one of the executives in hol'n fun and in charge of "boring stuff" like taxes or security. He certainly couldn't leave without some sort of instructions or promise that he'd be back.

4 will John ever have a will of his own? Or will he just do as he's told?

5 How much will the presence of Branch's older brothers change his zing? Will their antics and unusual behavior bother him?

6 How do the brothers feel about each other? Do any of them have a strong problem with John for doing their parents' bidding? Or maybe with Branch? Because he was the only one their parents really loved.

he does! vacay islanders LOOOVE him because he is an absolute PARTY ANIMAL, he loves pulling pranks and summoning drinks for them and stuff, brandy still falls for him because she knows despite his mischievous nature hes still a big softie on the inside!

his kids still exist, its just now theyre part-troll-part-vacay islander-part-imp :]

2. at first hes just trying to keep them out of trouble and protect pop village, but i feel like he actually ends up really happy that he had secret brothers cos he lost the rest of his family!

3. CLAY WOULD NEVER LEAVE VIVA ALONE LIKE THAT!! he found out about branch and like, it was almost like the scene in tbt where clay tells viva "i dont wanna lose my brother either" cos at this time viva probably still thinks poppy is dead... she'd understand that if there was even a CHANCE clay might be able to find this new baby brother and try to introduce himself, hed take it, just like she would go search for her sister (i dont have viva solidified just yet but im thinking either she comes along with clay, OR clay promises to bring poppy to her if he finds her, i definitely want viva to show up at some point, maybe all the bros can visit the putt putt trolls haha)

4. thats what his whole arc is gonna be about i think!! he obviously cares about his brothers a lot besides trying to get the BOY BAND back together, its like jd's canon arc of accepting that he doesnt need to be perfect except like. cranked up to 100. where he doesnt have to make other people happy he can make himself happy and do things for his own sake!!

5. HES GONNA BE REAL SCARED AT FIRST cos in this au its not like everyone in every kingdom is SUDDENLY supernatural, its only a few trolls! some trolls dont even think the supernatural is real but branch was probably raised as the superstitious type so hes always on the look out for what if monsters were real... imagine his surprise when he finds out that monsters ARE real and those monsters are his BROTHERS

6. i think the brothers like each other but not enough that they ran off together or anything! cos they were all in the same situation with their parents but they were each also the only monsters of their kind they knew, so i imagine all of them wanted to find a place for themselves

floyd and bruce probably get along REALLY well

i feel like the brothers kinda pity jd a little bit, jd really thought his parents were sweet people who loved all their kids- he wholeheartedly believes in them in a way the others don't, so all they can do is shake their heads and go "poor guy"

bruce might have wanted to get back at branch if it was a different situation, but now that hes a dad, he knows how important it is to look out for your family, so he goes to find branch because he wants to make friends with him... but cos hes an older brother as well as an imp that manifests in the form of teasing and playing tricks on him haha

i think floyd would be a little jealous of branch

[coal15]

So for the tens and tens of people out there following my WIPs, I apologize that it's been ages since I posted another chapter. At first it was just a monster case of writer's block but then a potentially devastating health crisis came up--for now it looks like I'm at least not staring down the barrel of imminent doom, but it has been a teensy bit distracting. I'm trying to get the creative engines revving again, but it's slow going. I don't wanna force things and end up cranking out garbage chapters, but it's hard not to pressure myself. So to lift my spirits and maybe re-ignite some confidence, I've decided to post links to the works I'm most proud of.

**fandoms represented below the cut are Heartstopper, 9-1-1, Good Omens, Sleepy Hollow, and The Magicians. Comments welcome but certainly not required (she says whilst mewling in the general direction of her inbox)

Protected. The Magicians, Queliot. Explicit but also full of romance and cuddles. If I had to pick one project as my "crowning achievement," it would be this baby. It follows Queliot's entire life together. 11 chapters. **it even got mentioned in a list on syfy, I had no idea until someone pointed it out to me in the comments, and yes I did 100% squeal about it for days even though it was just a tiny blurb on the list

Inconvenient Mistletoe. Sleepy Hollow, Ichabbie. Porn With Plot. (lots of plot) This was the first fanfic I ever wrote. Had no intention of publishing, but in a sudden fit of daring I posted it to ff.net and it got such an enthusiastic response I kept going. Covers the whole Apocalypse and a few years beyond. Every fic I've written since then owes its existence to this one. 17 chapters.

Of Guilt and Victory. Heartstopper, Nick and Charlie. General Audiences. This one is strange in that the story is what it is because Nick can't bear the thought of finding out someone has un-alived themselves when he knew it might happen and did/said nothing to intervene. This is in regards to Ben but at NO POINT is he forgiven for what he did nor sh*tty behavior in general, but this idea just fell into my mind based on what a beautiful golden retriever of a human Nick Nelson is, and the story evolved from there. It's odd, but I'm proud of it. 7 chapters.

A Series of Odd Proposals. Heartstopper, Nick and Charlie. General Audiences. This is one of those WIPs I mentioned. 8 chapters so far. It follows them through adulthood. In the chapter I'm currently writing their daughter is sixteen.

*Discalimer re: my 911 fics* yes I've written for both buddie and bucktommy, if it offends you that I've done such a thing the solution is easy: don't read them.

All's Well That Ends Well. 911, Buddie. Teen and up audiences. The whole thing pretty much revolves around the evolution of their love story from present day into old age. 10 chapters.

Buck's Gonna Buck. 911, Bucktommy. Mostly GA, but there is a brief mention of sex toys to I tagged it teen and up. These three "chapters" are just short, ridiculous drabbles. 1) Buck's POV getting ready for a date. 2) Tommy's POV getting ready for the date. 3) The date. Just silly fun. We haven't had much time w/them yet but I'm hoping to write more for them in s8 when there's more material to work with.

All Roads Lead Back. Good Omens, Aziracrow. Teen and up. One of those obnoxious WIPs. Starts a few weeks after s2 ends. 11 chapters thus far and we're tits deep in a rebellion against The Metatron in Heaven and searching for the true Almighty. Also, Muriel is a badass.

The Long Way Home. The Magicians, Queliot. Teen and up. Eliot embarks on a desperate mission to bring Quentin back from the underworld. Angst, danger, adventure, longing, romance, humor. Even a musical episode ********Okay, so this one is unusual in that I was just about to start writing the LAST DAMN CHAPTER when the pandemic hit. And how had I planned to end it since the very beginning? Well our heroes would win the war of course, but as a last act of vicious revenge before defeat the Library was gonna . . . wait for it . . . unleash a deadly pandemic upon the world and kill millions. I came up with this ending long before the pandemic, but . . . yeah. Nope. But I couldn't think of a better idea either. So it just sat there without an ending and thanks to everything else going on in the world I totally forgot about it for like a year. And when I did remember I still couldn't come up with anything better than my original idea. Should I finish it and stick to the original plan even though it's SO on the nose? I am super open to alternative suggestions here, because if it had an ending I absolutely would have listed it right up there with Protected. Currently 12 chapters. Again, alternative ending suggestions super welcome!

[hetalia-club]

How do I keep people alive in that Oregon Trail game? People keep getting sick and dying a couple days later.

Couple tips from an old OT pro.

1. Never waste your money on food at the start of the game when buying supplies. You can buy a little just to get going but instead buy like 800 bullets and instead of wasting your money on food and then go hunting. Hunting is really easy and you can farm it. 1 bullet is like $.2 and you can get 100 lbs of food each time you go out hunting so that is a crazy trade off. And like I said you can farm the hunting animals will just keep spawning.

2. If someone is sick or hurt pull over and rest a couple days. The length of the rest depends on how sick they are like a fever take a 3 day rest. If they broke a limb take a week. Hunt in between days so you don’t run out of supplies because when you sit around and are sick they eat more. They also have to have adequate food to heal. So seriously don’t adjust the supplies rate consumption nothing good comes from it. However don’t hang around too long because it can quickly go to shit. Resting at land marks is a good idea if possible. Those are relatively safe and your people heal better at places with people rather than the wilderness.

3. Don’t change their supplies consuming rate unless you are completely out of food and bullets for some reason. The less they eat the more apt they are to get sick. Pay attention to the “bad water” prompts. If the water is bad don’t hang around that area crank up your speed and try and get out of there as quick as possible because they will be drinking the water and can get sick from it. It will tire the oxen and might break your wagon but it’s worth the risk.

4. Don’t trade with people unless you have to their trades are usually Bull shit. Like they want 2 oxen in exchange for 1 pair of fresh clothes. Like yeah I’ll get right on that deal…

5. Don’t skip on the clothes. They may seem pointless and you might not use them your whole game but if you happen to need them you can’t do anything about it and it’s like an insta death unless you are near a shop which isn’t likely. 4 pair is usually good. You can also use them to trade for wagon parts to desperate people which is handy if you are also desperate. If your people fall in the river in the winter and don’t have fresh clothes they will freeze to death.

6. Don’t blow all your money at the start in wagon parts. 2 wheels, and one of everything else is normally okay. You have a chance to repair the part if your wagon breaks. And you will need money for safer ways across the deeper rivers and wagon parts late game. Buy at least 4 oxen. Sometimes they die for no reason. Other times you’ll get lucky and never have to trade them out. But if they all die you’re stranded. And no one EVER wants to trade you their oxen. And if they do they want something absolutely insane for them like 600 lbs of food and all your bullets.

7. You can stop and hunt whenever you want. You don't even have to take rest days to do it. And like I said you can just farm it and get your food supplies up to insane amounts and only do it in one run if you want or you can space it out. But don’t buy food. And don’t trade your bullets. Bullets get stolen a lot by bandits so you might have a lot and then all of a sudden you lose 200 in the night from bandits. So trading them for wagon parts isn’t that good of an idea because they are both your protection and source for gaining free food if you get below 300 and have the chance to buy more then do it!

8. Also don't forge the river if it's over 5ft deep. That means you are walking in the water and leading your wagon through. if its deeper than that most of you will drown more than likely. This is where you need money. Sometimes there will be natives near by who are willing to help you cross and will want a trade of clothes, bullets or food. Or you can pay a ferry. If you don't have the option to either then caulk the wagon and float it across. This is the safest bet but sill risky if teh river is too wide across.

[scruffyssketchbook]

Wow this man is tragic.. i never thought i'd feel bad for him, and he was supposed to be alone in the future if i remember correctly from either this blog or ask-ssec way back when

Was cheering for his downfall now i kinda just want him to go to a therapist, get out of the eevee box and just chill out with friends in box 2. Maybe drag in blizz and dawn with him

In the future, he was supposed to lose everything and everyone hates him (except Blizz), it completely changed his personality due to all the trauma of it, actually. He became more anxious and clingy in general, more wanting to prove that he can be trusted, that he genuinely does love all of them and just wants them to be safe, that's all he ever wanted, really. Also he cranks up his silliness to 100 because he just wants the others to smile at him again.

Of course, Dusk made a lot of terrible mistakes, but he was also just used constantly by the pokemon around him and like- a CHILD. That's also why he desires control, because he was tricked and used and had his agency taken away so many times in the past, and he just wants some semblance of control over his life.

Since this will never be explored due to the changes, in the lab, Dusk was connected to a system along with many other eevees. He couldn't move (or feel) his body, his thoughts were mixed with the others, he was not "him" anymore, he was "we" because "him" did not exist anymore. He was part of one whole system, just another part of a component. The only reason he could break out of the system was because he constantly, obsessively, watched the other main boys through cameras. that was the only thing that grounded him, that made him able to use his psychic ability to break his chains and escape, but he only had the strength to do this after almost 3 eevee years DUE to the other main boys, due to how much he wanted to help them, due to how much he saw of them being hurt, or changing badly. and he wanted to be able to do something, to keep them safe, to keep EVERYONE SAFE.

That's why in the ask blog he says that Blizz was evil, he saw the things Blizz did to others and was freaked out by what he became, about the things he did. He helped the other boys a lot without them even knowing, but ofc, he was doing this while literally battling with the system itself, and he was alone, but not alone, and it was so so dark, but light, and so so very cold, but hot, but how is he even feeling these things if he cant even feel his body or move??

He doesn't like thinking about this.

He's actually seen the most death out of the whole cast due to this. He's seen eevees be butchered and rotting bodies left on the floor decaying and killers in the act. Doing it again and again without any remorse or guilt (again, as a CHILD). It's why he's a pacifist. Violence- like actual violence freaks him out.

In Box 31, Dusk still goes through the character arc he was supposed to go through, but it'll actually start with how he is in the future, rather than how he is right now. Ofc, a lot of the details will change, I doubt he'll be as obsessed with control and safety, but in the long run he will be happier! and that is literally all I want, him and the rest of the cast to be happy.

[spgothkidsheadcanons]

Can I ask for the goth kids with a s/o who’s being severely bullied?

Of course you can! I hope you enjoy :) And if you ever need anyone to talk to about anything, you can always shoot me a message!

Warnings: reader being bullied, mentions of bullying

~~~~~~~~

Unfortunately, you were a subject to bullying. You had no clue why. You were sweet, stayed to yourself, hell, you usually had your face buried in a book 24/7. It made you wonder why you were subject to people’s taunts, and even more so made you wonder why these young adults were acting like they were still in highschool. You thought since it was college, all the senseless bullying and bitching would end. God, you wished you were so lucky.

Leaving your college for the last time that day, you trudged to your car. Cranking the engine, you whipped out of your parking spot, practically flooring it as tears began to bubble up in your eyes. Your heart hurt at the words of the bullies, your stomach twisting uneasily as the weight of their words finally began to settle in your mind. Nearly blinded by the tears welping up in your eyes, it was like your body had taken control of itsself, managing to get you home with water clouded vision.

Arriving at your home, you shut your car off, not bothering to grab your stuff as you ran to the front door, flinging it open and slamming it shut behind you. You looked to the couch, seeing that you’re love was sitting there, the television running but attention on you. You flung yourself on them, burying your face into their lap. Stroking your hair, they asked you:

Michael:

“Hey, what’s the matter?” your boyfriend, Michael, asked softly. You never picked up your head, mumbling something into his lap. “What?” he asked, brows furrowing. Turning around, you rested your head against his thighs, his fingers never stopping running through your (h/c) locks. “I feel like I’m in fucking highschool again.” you groaned, your (e/c) eyes looking into his deep brown ones. Michael winced, noticing how your eyes were red and slightly swollen.

“What happened?” he prodded, reaching to grab the television remote to mute the background noise. “I’m getting fucking bullied. For everything. My hair, my body, my voice, hell, even the way that I act. I can’t read my book while not bothering anyone without someone saying some shit about it. I fucking hate that stupid ass college. Everyday makes me want to drop out!” you snapped at no one in particular, hands moving wildly as you explained your woes. Michael wiped away the tears that you didn’t even know were running down your cheeks, too caught up in your story to notice.

“Don’t let those dickhats get to you, (Y/n),” Michael started, rubbing your cheeks to soothe you, “They’re nobodies. They peaked in highschool, and all they know is how to be an asshole. If you wanna drop out of college, I support you 100%, but they don’t deserve your tears. We can get you enrolled into some online classes, as long as you’ll be happy and stop coming home crying.” You stared up at Michael, listening to the sweet tone in his voice. Smiling up at him, you leaned up, pressing a kiss against his lips. “Thank you, Michael. I love you.” you murmured, pressing your forehead against his. “I love you, more.” he replied, wrapping an arm around you to pull you close.

Henrietta:

“What’s wrong, dear?” Henrietta hummed, her fingers twisting in your hair. You sighed heavily, breath catching as though you were ready to sob. “I’m just sick of being bullied, Hen. Like, that’s middle school shit, I’m in college. I shouldn’t have to feel like ripping my hair out because of some stupid ass words.” you huffed, the sadness you came home with being replaced with anger by the whole situation. Your girlfriend hummed, beginning to braid small strands of your hair.

“Bullying sucks, no matter what age you are. And sadly, it’s just gonna happen. That’s the sick, twisted reality of being alive.” she explained, using logic to make you feel better. “But when will it ever fucking end? I don’t do anything to anybody. Why is it just me?” you retorted, voice cracking as you started crying. Henrietta sighed, her fingers stalling their braiding. “Turn over.” she ordered. You obliged, turning to lay on your back instead of your stomach, your tear filled eyes looking up at her. It hurt her to see you upset, but she knew sugarcoating things was not the way to go.

“It’s not just you, (Y/n). I was bullied for years because of my weight… Not even was. I still get comments made about my body, but I literally do not give a shit. Because at the end of the day, they go home to their dog, or cat, or no one, and end up crying themselves to sleep because they’re sad and alone forever. Meanwhile, I get to go home, eat dinner with you, and then sleep in the same bed as someone who loves me. The only difference between our experiences is that I never gave a shit. I don’t care what people say about me, and you really shouldn’t either. It’s not good for your brain.” Henrietta explained, tapping your forehead. You stayed silent, thinking on her words.

“I guess you’re right…” you said quiety. Henrietta smiled, leaning down to plant a kiss on your forehead. “I know I’m right.” she quipped, pressing a few more kisses over your face. “Now, stop crying. It’s gonna make me kill a bitch.” your girlfriend threatened, resuming her attention back to the show she was watching. You smiled fondly up at her, a dreamy look in your eyes. “I think I’m more attracted to you than I ever was.” you mumbled, your heart fluttering in your chest.

Pete:

“What’s up?” Pete inquired, turning his full attention to you. You turned on your back to look up at him, a frown evident on your face. “I’m being bullied… I feel like a teenager again.” you griped, anger flaring. You couldn’t even be sad at this point. The fact that you were a victim of this bullshit did nothing but make your blood boil. Pete’s heart broke seeing how bad the bullying was affecting you.

“Why don’t you just drop out?” your boyfriend suggested, snapping you out of your thoughts. Dropping out was definitely a possibility, but it was going to be such a pain to find classes to do online. “Well, I’d have to enroll in classes online.” you replied. “No you don’t. Drop out of college completely,” Pete said nonchalantly, “What good is it doing you anyway? If you drop out, then you never run the risk of being bullied.”

You listened to his words, mulling what he was saying over in your head. Pete was right. The senseless bullying would end and you wouldn’t have to be subject to the terror that is college-turned-highschool ever again. Sighing, you nodded, confirming his offer. “It would also give me more time to annoy you.” you snickered, reaching your hand up to pinch Pete’s cheek. He grumbled, rolling his eyes. “Nevermind, stay in school so I can have my 8 hours of freedom.”

[lock-my-feelings-in-a-jar]

what do you use to make your gifs?

instagiffer!!!! i use it on my desktop computer, you can either use the built in screen recorder on it, or upload a video, which i prefer doing because i can do the whole video easier that way.

i'm gonna just start going through a bunch of things about it and how i use it now in case anybody tries it out

so like there's this thing:

that you'll want to uncheck if you plan on making multiple gifs because it will save over the first gif you make if left checked.

wait i'll load a video into it so i can get to more options

using an interview one because i like seeing his face in it, so okay

excuse me blocking out the file path, ignore that

so you can go to "view frames in explorer" which opens up the folder where the program stores all of the frames it extracted

there's the delete frames one, which brings up this

delete even frames only will just delete every other frame, cutting the amount in half if the gif is too big in size

i usually just delete frames from the extraction folder, but this is quick if i do want to cut them down to half.

manual crop brings this up

so like you can either use that, which is more precise, or drag the red blocks on the corners of this part

like

and you can click and hold the black block in the middle to drag the whole selection around

and as it says on the top, if you doubleclick on the whole scene, it will delete a frame

rightclick to preview doesn't work for me, i prefer to just click and hold the arrows where it shows the frame amount at the bottom because it shows kind of how it'll look and the speed changes when you change

^ this, which i actually always have set to -1 because 0 always seems a little too fast. things are always slightly faster when uploaded to tumblr too for some reason. i crank it all the way down to -10 for most of my slowed gifs and the sped up ones i usually have on either 0 or 1

so i also always put quality up to 100 and i always put smoothness as high as it'll let me

which also increases the amount of frames it'll load up, but i prefer to make multiple gifs of one scene than to have one choppy not-smooth looking gif. but sometimes i delete some frames if some look close enough to the last frame before it and the gif turns out just a tiny bit above tumblr's size limit

^ effects panel! you can mess around with these however you want, i never use anything from this besides enhance. sometimes that can mess with certain videos(usually newer ones) too, so if it looks really weird then i'll try it again without enhance and see if it's better.

the captions one, for subtitles and things:

that brings up this, you can mess with things and figure out where , when and how you want the text

the frame size slider, i normally have to make a few test gifs to adjust it to a good size:

lately i've just been uploading videos into a video editor (VSDC) and then saving them again before uploading to instagiffer because it always saves everything about the same size(and then i can fix some other things at the same time if needed), so my usual is 45 or 50, but without doing that, it'll probably be different for different videos

and since i almost always do every scene of videos, i go 2 minutes at a time, so i set this:

to 120

it takes a bit for it to extract all the frames

when that's done, i make sure i have another folder for storage somewhere on my computer, doesn't matter where it is, it can just be on the desktop or something. i take all of the extracted frames from the first folder and put them into the storage folder.

i also always have a THIRD folder up of where i'm saving the gifs to

so the whole thing looks like this:

so when i do scenes, the extraction folder and the storage folder go like

wait i'll find a shorter scene

okay so i can just keep all of the frames in that side > and

drag all frames from one scene like this^

over to

< this side

and then click one of these arrow buttons

and it will load up the frames that are in that folder

so now it's just that one 35 frame scene in there

always check the first and last frames before making the gif to make sure the scenes didn't bleed together

i gotta. fix that crop thing i did, wait

that's better

anyway make sure you choose a save location for your gifs here

so i make gifs of everything in the storage folder by dragging over one scene at a time, then when i get to the end of theee. how many frames was that, 3600

okay when i get to the end of that, it usually cuts off in the middle of a scene, so i have to go ahead by 1 minute

so i put a 1 here

it extracts the frames starting at 1 minute into the video

this is where the last ones one ended at frame 3600

so i have to find where the same scene is in the newly extracted frames

1800 would be where 3600 ended, so there's the start of the scene:

i delete everything else in both folders besides the frames of that one scene until i'm done with it, then i go to minute 2

there are some frames of the last part of that scene at the start of minute 2, so i delete those and start at the next part after it

so those 60 frames can be deleted.

and then i gif everything until i get to the end of those two minutes, repeat this process and so on until the video ends. two minutes at a time.

and this is how i mass produce gifs. just keep dragging frames from one folder to another, run it through the gif program, upload to tumblr, repeat

i like to have that third folder of where the gifs are saved just in case one is too big and i need to delete it before trying again, if i make multiple versions of one gif(different speeds, with or without certain bits, etc) i'll rename it things like, if it autosaves the first gif of a certain scene as insta001(it saves them like insta, insta001, insta002, etc), i'll rename a slow version of it "insta001(slow)" so the files are less confusing when i need to upload everything, i can just upload the normal numbered ones into a set and then save the different speed ones for their own posts without having to check each file to make sure it's the right one (i have been known to be confused from time to time)

there's also a fun loop thing here:

i haven't used loop in a long time but i remember having fun with it

ALSO i always like to have a screenshot of all of my settings on instagiffer in case a bug happens and it crashes or if i need to stop and take a break until another time so i know exactly where i left off, what frame size i had, what scene it was on, etc. i just take a quick screenshot of the program and the folders on side of it so i can see the way it was when i stopped last and i keep it in the same folder the gifs are saved in.

you can also upload already made gifs to edit them, or add pictures or anything, but if it's not the right size, something might look a bit squished.

there are things that will force you to restart instagiffer too, like if you make a gif annnnd

if you have this on

(accidentally posted while i'm still answering this oops, editing it still)

and it shows

this when the gif is done

and then you DELETE THE GIF from the folder before you click "OK"

then everything will be grayed out and it won't work, you have to restart it and load the video back up

OKAY I'LL STOP HERE since i didn't mean to post this already, it made me panic a little

[dollarbin]

The Dollar Bin at 100

It seems fitting that I should begin this, my 100th post in The Dollar Bin, with some heartfelt apologies.

Dear Wife,

I'm sorry my records are here, there and everywhere. But they are changing my life with a wave of... nevermind. I'm also sorry I cranked Empire Burlesque while you were doing yoga.

Dear Hipster Staff At My Record Store,

I'm sorry I consistently get your hopes up by amassing a fat stack of records that wind up costing just $16 total. When you hand me back all my new Bonnie Raitt and Mama Cass and say "have fun" with zero conviction I know that what you really mean is "you and your collection seriously suck mister." I hear you, hipster. I hear you.

Dear Famous Brother,

I'm sorry I copied your ass by writing a music blog, and I'm sorry my blog debases your entire professional field. I'm also sorry for occasionally schooling and lambasting you in print. Check that: I'm not sorry at all, broheim. I'm giggling.

Dear Stephen Stills,

I'm so sorry for all the mean things I have said about... forget it, I can't do it. Hey Stills: you still suck.

Dear Reader,

That's you! I'm sorry about all my typos and my complete lack of conciseness. I'm also sorry that Sandy Saturdays are often posted on Wednesdays, and that I almost only write about white people from 50 years ago. And yes, I acknowledge that I've written way more about Ringo more than any other Beatle. Way more. But I refuse to apologize for that fact.

Okay, now what?

I know:

Here's a handy guide, complete with links, for every silly thing I've written about in 100 posts.

I started this whole thing out of the blue last August by going on and on about a Joan Baez record no one else on earth currently listens to. Then I argued that Jerry Jeff Walker's voice cracks are high art. Clearly I had a target audience of about 15 people.

Even so, a few of my posts struck a bit of a chord, bringing in new readers like all of you - and I'm glad you are here! There was the time I explained how John Darnielle of The Mountain Goats taught me how to cook; people also liked when I shouted about the greatness that is The Roches. (My second piece on the Roches was a bit less of a smash, but oh well...).

Occasionally I've had some ideas to express. Listen to the Doors. Judy Collins rocks. Linda Ronstadt is the greatest artist in the Dollar Bin and sings pretty great backup. Gordon Lightfoot went electric. Emmylou Harris sings the best Jesus music. Steeleye Span did not ruin music; indeed they're often obscurely brilliant.

And sometimes I've just entertained myself by my writing about Dead Skunks in the middle of the road, Cat Stevens comedic skills or the links I contrived between Sandy Denny and Biz Markie.

There's also been some (silly and possibly inebriated) fury. Take the times when I laid waste to my famous brother's Dylan and Stephen Stills claims, or the days when I unleashed my wrath on Roger McGuinn, Graham Nash and Grace Slick.

Somehow Stephen Stills comes up quite a bit.

And yeah, I write a whole lot about Neil Young. I used his first, unappreciated record to introduce my whole Shakey Sundays project, then I moved on to trash The Monsanto Years, quibble with Peace Train, reclaim Living With War, scratch my head over Life, and shout about the glories of Ragged Glory on not just on one, but two, and then three different occasions. I also used Old Ways as a vehicle for describing some fairly reprehensible parenting on my part, considered The Shocking Pinks, quivered in the face of the greatness that is Odeon / Budokan, reported on Neil's current tour, compared Neil to my own father through Before and After, ignored him and focused instead on Richie Furray, had a mellow Sunday while listening to Comes a Time and screamed about Eldorado.

What's more, I complained about Young's attention to detail in Landing on Water, survived him on wacko safari in Earth, had fever dreams during a covid case, made big claims about After the Goldrush and discovered over two very different posts that I was grown up enough to finally appreciate Time Fades Away. The whole project is pretty never ending in that Young puts out a new record just about once a month and I've got a long way to go.

Sandy Denny has been my other major focus, and for good reason. After all, she should have had a hit in 67, is a lyrical equal to Dylan and Young, recorded some very sweet demos, scorned Pete Townsend, fronted her own band long before the public was ready for that level of feminist power, made the soundtrack for a movie no one has ever seen, provided parents with a I-love-you-now-go-to-sleep anthem, backed up Richard Thompson on the song that should be featured in all graduations, showed off her pop music pipes, is impossible to find performing live on the internet, and had her songs mangled by Fairport Convention except when she was making improved, vastly improved and then perfect music with them, even when it was about meat products left out in nature.

Then we had World Party week with one, two, three, four, five and then six different posts to honor the passing of one of my favorite artists from the 80s/90s, Karl Wallinger. RIP Karl.

Probably too often I wrote about my own pedestrian biography more than the music itself. That happened with Uncle Tupelo, and in big ways with Tom Petty's lost-to-me second record, Shakey's Re-ac-tor and Nelson Sings Kristofferson. Oh yeah and there was the time I melted all my new records...

One great thing about the blog is that it forces me to actually listen to all my records. And so my appreciation grew for some artists like Mickey Newberry (here and here), Bonnie Raitt, June Tabor, and Randy Newman

There are plenty of other artists that I'm just getting started with: Cat Stevens, Paul Simon, Van Morrison, Linda Thompson, The Incredible String Band, Stevie Nicks, Dump/Yo La Tengo, Carole King and Roger Miller will all deserve many future posts.

Finally, there are a few posts that I am pretty proud of.

There's the deep dives I took on Kris Kristofferson and Lord Franklin's connections to my own biography, and I'm glad I connected Ian Matthews to Richard Thompson and the terrible suffering in Gaza.

Plus, I think my first big piece on Dylan was alright, Ma. And I had a lovely weekend morning listening to Jonathan Richman.

And finally, I'm proud of my Sandy Denny piece on songs that birth worlds and another rambling meditation about her that included CS&N fighting over a sandwich.

Okay, you did it: you read a whole post about posts. Thank you so much for supporting my self-indulgent blog people. I really appreciate it.

[female-malice]

Why do you think Mozart’s music isn’t genius?

Because he's not Beethoven.

Mozart's music is about performing in court for aristocrats. Mozart did not move stylistically beyond what he was taught by Haydn. Mozart was not the first at anything. He was not the inventor of the classical style he composed in. He was not the first child prodigy to travel from court to court.

I'm not saying Mozart's music is bad. It's good. But the word genius is a very loaded and lofty word that I don't like to use. If you're going to use the word "genius" for someone, it should be someone who's ahead of their time. Mozart was a man of his time, not ahead of it.

I give Haydn more credit than Mozart because Haydn had a larger role in the creation of the classical style. Also, Haydn had enough humility, patience, and restraint to be a good teacher.

Haydn was both Mozart's teacher and Beethoven's teacher. So Beethoven was given the same exact lessons as Mozart by the same exact teacher. And Beethoven changed the course of music history in a way that Mozart didn't.

Beethoven was a century ahead of his time. Beethoven invented the romantic style. And he even wrote music in the modernist style that came after the romantic style. Every composer that came after Beethoven copied Beethoven's romantic style. And 100 years after Beethoven's death, modernist composers like Stravinsky were clearly inspired by Beethoven's proto-modernism.

Also, there's the rate of composition. Mozart has 50 symphonies while Beethoven has 9. But it's about quality over quantity. Every single one of Beethoven's symphonies shattered all the norms and conventions of style. Then he'd go back to his little closet of an apartment and work on the next one. And work on it and work on it for like three whole years. And then he'd pull it out and bam! Break through all the style and convention breakthroughs he made in the previous symphony.

Mozart's 50 symphonies are not like this. He was just cranking them out. They're conventional to his time period and to the classical style. They're good. They're nice. That's it.

[its-toasted]

[100 days deep]

i walked with no limp or pain for the first time on acid in late april. it was too soon, numbness induced by the drug so i suffered after lol. but we got home and i was just crying on the floor because we were free, and up til then i wasn't sure this was healing normally. another month past and we're almost ready for the regular bops. this week is straight 70s no rain, and by midsummer i'll be shooting hoops again

despite the creative shadings lately, i don't feel dark. i feel sharp and healthy (lol) and whole, but very in my box. a lot of what i crank cuts against accessible flows, but like i write to the world all day and that gets so tiring if you can imagine, so here i still like to write my page songs. i guess i'm in a holding pattern til at least after we move, or when i hear back from the two chap contests i'm most rooting for

the press i was a finalist for was Iron Horse! i'm not surprised i didn't win, like reading the work of poets i was up against i shook my head. so dope. we'll get em next time. it meant a world that they believed so much in the first place, and let me reflect in ways that i needed. the last couple months i've been reading hella tumblr and journals again. i ask myself why not write shit that could connect. it's a long and not-great story, at least the way i'd tell it. i'm not very interested in thinking beautifully right now. of course i chase it but i won't get there fake, there's shit i need to work through before i play pretend

i need to get to the next place naturally. feel like i've been breaking the same ground for a while. the broken foot really fucked with our trajectory, but it did allow time for me to stay right with work, with money, with hunting for a home, and growing with the dog. we've been ready to move for a month, still another to wait. everyday i'm trying to keep my head straight, get better at what i do. remember that i don't need to prove myself anymore, because that's still hard for someone like me. an ex-many things type. so yeah i'm scared to crack the code. being lonely fucks with the head. it's nothing deadly

[cicaklah]

Is this over 500 words? I have no idea! But I couldn't send you the whole damn fic, so here (go let the stars watch)

He wipes his brow and listens to the silence. The cabin is far north enough that in the summer it never gets fully dark, and in winter it barely sees light, but it's well into spring now, so night still comes politely by in time for dinner.

He goes back into the house and uses the matches to set the fire going. The sat phone lies silent, charged now all the way to 100%. He goes and hides it in the bedroom, to avoid the temptation to endlessly check the connection, swaps it for the GPS, and goes to find something to eat.

In the kitchen the first cupboard he opens contains a heavy bottomed square glass in a fashionable ribbed pattern. Next to it he finds a bottle of brandy next to a bottle of cabernet sauvignon. The label is Yates, of course. There’s nothing Diana loves more than a callback.

The freezer has ice, and some whisky stones, and he takes one of each for the novelty, and sloshes the brandy over them, admiring how the cubes clink nicely against the thick glass.

He takes a deep drink, and considers the benefits of just keeping going, just pouring brandy into an empty stomach, consequences be damned.

The fridge contains all the ingredients for dinner: a package of premade meatballs that proclaim the pedigree and quality of the animals ground up for the consumer’s delectation, a large, hand formed block of butter studded with salt crystals, and a cabbage in rude health for the time of year. The cupboard produces some potatoes, onions, some dried herbs, a heel of dry bread and a single clove of garlic.

The message is clear; when in Sweden, make meatballs. Diana's always loved a stereotype, and they’re both known for their love for dramatic irony. He would hate to disappoint.

A bird outside trills evensong. Up this north, it startles him; they should not be here at this time of year.

He forces his hopes back down, thinking of the phone lying on the bed, unwatched. Takes another long drink and concentrates on making food, working through each step in his head to replicate a good meal he had a long time ago.

He makes a point of using every pan he gets a whim for using, focuses on doing everything properly, drawing on hints from every mission that started during dinner service in every fancy restaurant he’s ever ruined the reputation of.

He takes the time to caramelise the onions properly. It always takes longer than he thinks, even with his legendary patience, he almost gives up half way through and adds sugar, but instead forces himself to stir them until they’re sticky and sweet and stick to the bottom of the pan.

He sets the potatoes steaming rather than boiling, the way he prefers them, fluffy and bursting their skins but not waterlogged. He fries the cabbage in the butter gently until it's just cooked, translucent but not a hint of browning, a delicate balancing act of fat, salt and heat. In the cupboard he finds a tiny packet of fennel seeds and throws them in with the single clove of minced garlic, waits half a minute, and then then cranks the heat and sixty seconds later, it's done. He reuses that pan, no need to waste good brown butter, and throws in the meatballs, followed a few minutes later by a slug of brandy to deglaze the pan (followed by another slug for himself), and then it’s done. He plates it simply, taking his time, even wipes the rim of the place to keep the fiction going that there is a point to this, that he is happier this way than if it was just piled up, messy and with no style at all.

He never usually gets to cook. Even this last year, he relied on buying food in order to receive human contact, endlessly chasing the withdrawal from her voice in his ear with lesser qualities of humanity.

He eats his meal with the radio for company, tries to see if his Swedish is still serviceable, but they keep talking in English and it throws him off. It is delicious, and his body is starving after a day wading through snow, but asked with a gun to his head he probably wouldn’t be able to describe it in any detail once he’s done.

The sun has set, and there’s no television here, and he bought no laptop with him, travelled light save a change of clothes.

He decides to takes a shower for something to do and realises, standing naked in the good pressure, the steam curling around his body and condensing on the low ceiling, that he is drunk, and so he gives up pretending to control his thoughts and stays there until the hot water fades into lukewarm and then into tepid, and uses her soap, wishes it was scented in some way he could recognise. Even pressed to his nose it just smells of soap, of clean skin, and for a foolish moment he laments that he cannot use her shampoo and conditioner.

There isn't much else to the cabin. There's one bed, large and sturdy with serviceable well worn white sheets and heirloom woolen blankets. The pillows are unremarkable, not particularly soft, just goose feathers and cotton. There’s a dent in one, from her head, where she slept for however many nights without him. He thinks about the implications of it. That she faced away from the door as she slept, facing the large windows, vulnerable and yet sure of her own safety.

She knew he was coming, and chose to not be here.

He finds a pair of loose soft pajamas in a men's medium in the middle drawer of the dresser, warm and soft in the way things are when they still have the manufacturing residue on them, so they feel good under your fingers in the store. He finds the matching navy blue t-shirt in amongst her clothes, tucked in the corner, but unlike the trousers the shirt is worn but not artificially soft. When he pulls it over his head he’s overwhelmed with the scent of something warm under the laundry detergent, a smell that transports him back to a warm afternoon, triumph momentarily in his veins, rich soil beneath his feet, wine on his tongue and her in his arms, then everything flipped; the soil beneath his hands and knees, his whole world consumed with her, the last thing he ever expected to see.

He trusts her; there is always a reason for everything she does. There’s reason hiding in everything in this cabin if he can find it, solve it, tease out the meaning.

He walks back into the living room. The only other thing of note in the place is a sheepskin rug in front of the fire. It isn't your usual one, this has been well prepared with a proper underlay stitched into the skin so it doesn't go skidding on the wooden floors should you walk over it, or perhaps do other things on it. The implication coupled with the brandy makes him flush. He thinks of red on white, and for the first time in a while the mental image isn’t blood on snow.

He retunes the radio from general chatter until he finds the classical station and catches the first few notes of Dvorak's eighth, a perennial favourite, and after so many hours of forbidding it, he gives into the weakness that’s been lapping at his heels all afternoon, gives into being tired, well fed, tipsy and clean and lets his mind relax into yearning. He pours another large brandy and stands there until the final note rings and the applause begins, his bare toes dug into the thick pelt, eyes closed and barely listening, his mind ten-thousand miles away, dancing to a different song altogether.

Eventually, the applause fades away and some chamber music starts, and he has nowhere to go but sleep. Eventually, he has to climb into bed and so he takes the other side from the dented pillow, the side near the door. He lies there listening to the pops and crackle of the dying fire, and when it eventually sputters to silence, he stays awake watching the stars through the large windows, triple glazed to keep out the cold but preserve the view, and eventually gives into the needs of his body, and sleeps.

Okay so there is SO much in this excerpt! But I can tell you that the bit where 47 cooks meatballs was inspired by the time I went on holiday to the Gothenberg archipelago and was staying on Brännö in a little bed and breakfast and was the only guest since my friend had cancelled at the last minute. I couldn't afford to go to the only restaurant open on the island out of season, so instead I went to the little shop on the island and bought the ingredients to make dinner, a pack of meatballs, some pasta, some sauce, and had a nice evening cooking and eating by myself in a lovely house with the radio on. That holiday is specifically why I always set the fuck cabin in Sweden, because I had such an idyllic time.

Also cabbage cooked in butter is my all time favourite food, I literally had it for dinner tonight (with bacon and polenta, but it was mostly cabbage in butter).

The other thing I wanted to just mention is that Dvorak is my favourite classical composer, and my ex and I initially bonded over our mutual correct opinion that the eighth symphony is the best, better than the 9th (the 9th is the most famous). Listening to a symphony on the radio with a glass of something good is something I don't do enough these days.

I've kvetched enough about how this story killed me and I still haven't gotten over it completely, but it really feels like the cumulation of all the deep romantic post-steak, post hitman 3 ideas I have about them as a couple, how much I want the struggle for each other to be their defining dynamic. Diana not being there, being scared, them both building it up in their heads too much, the release of being free for the first time in their lives at the ages of 55 and 45, the paradox of being powerful and in control and still scared of fucking up...that is the CORE of them, that is the romance. That is all I want from them. Yes they are beautiful, yes they are sexy, yes they belong together, but it isn't worth anything if they aren't having to overcome themselves, having to do the work of acceptance to be happy. That is precisely why I had such a bad time writing this story, because I wrote the sex scene first and then I had to make them earn it and it was really one of the most difficult things to do, because why shouldn't they just have it? Why was Diana gone? Why can't they just do it? And this was basically my manifesto.