#but then they are trapped in the revenge and have to eat seagulls holy shit!!!

[jaypentaghast]

let's be real for a second

fang is the one true victim in all this

[captainstevenjohnstonme]

Mutant Moth.

When I walked into the kitchen I heard a rustling sound coming from the pantry.

My first thought was maybe I had a mice or cockroach, so imagine my surprise when I opened the door and hundreds of tiny moths flew out.

I grabbed a can of fly spray and gave the pesky insects a good spurt but it had no effect on them at all.

The moths weaved and dodged the insecticide like they were dancing to the flight f the bumble bee.

So they want a fight do they? well i will give them one.

I went to the store and bought a few pantry moth baits then headed back home whistling the theme from 'Rocky'.

The baits work by attracting the male moths to a female's pheromone that causes the randy moths to stick to the glue on the bait where they die without losing their virginity.

Like seagulls swooping down onto a chip the moths divebomb the baits and by midafternoon most of the moths are stuck fast.

I grab a cold beer from the fridge to celebrate my victory then sit down to watch a footy game on the TV.

At 6o'clock I ring to have a pizza delivered and notice that most of the trapped moths have begun to turn black on the edges like a teenage goth.

When the food arrives I eat it heartedly and wash the pepperoni down with another beer.

A couple of hours later I am searching netflix for something decent to watch when a single mishappen moth lands on the coffee table and gives me the death stare.

'Holy crap maybe I should lay off the beers for a while?' I mutter to myself, but this is my house and I will do what I want.

After I open the beer I check out the bait that is on the running board in the kitchen and the moths to my drunken eyes all look at me as they all wriggle free leaving behind an assortment of wings, legs and some even fly off leaving behind their heads.

Soon all of the baits are moth free and my house is full of the deformed creatures.

I don't have an energy to deal with this shit so I run upstairs to my bedroom. close and lock the door than jam a few shirts beneath the door just in case the moths learnt how to crawl before they could fly.

In the morning I wake feeling a little seedy than suddenly remember what happened last night so I jump out of bed put an ear to the door but there is complete silence so I remove the shirts beneath the door and walk downstairs half expecting to see the living room swarming with reincarnated moths but there is nothing to be seen.

I have been having trouble with my weird neighbor so I am hoping that the moths flew over there crawled up his arse and built a giant nest.

Now that would be the ultimate revenge.

A month has gone by and my life has returned to normal, I haven't seen a single moth.

Maybe they have flown south for the winter or gone back to where they belong but no such because when I go to check the letterbox after work I got swooped by what I thought was a magpie because it was their breeding season but when I looked up I saw that I had been attacked by one of the moths.

This moth was the size of a small bird and had half of its head missing.

Soon it was joined by around fifty other moths in with various deformities.

The flock swooped down attacking mainly my face and neck region and luckily I was able to make it back to my car but I had received quite a few nasty bites so I decided to drive to the hospital to have them checked out.

The doctor on duty asked me how I received the bites I told him that I had been attacked by a few crazy magpies. 'That is strange because magpies Don't usually attack in groups.'

'What can I say doc, these birds were out of control. I could of been killed.'

The doctor cleans my wounds before sowing them closed with 37 stitches. then he gives been a bottle of painkillers and sends me on my way.

I am tempted to go to the police station and tell them that I had been attacked by a flock of giant mutant moths but I have no desire to get locked up in the loony bin so I drive home open the garage door by remote and drive in.

Then I lower the door and wait until it is fully closed before exiting my car.

After putting a few slices of leftover pizza in the microwave I slump on the couch to rest but than I hear a loud noise coming from the roof of my house and when I stand up a few tiles fly past a side window and crash to the ground outside.

Then I hear the sound of something like one hundred birds peaking at the paster board on the ceiling but I know that it isn't birds up there so I say a prayer and make a run for it but I don't get very far before the ceiling collapses and a huge flock of mutant moths fly down.

I duck and weave like a featherweight boxer, well middleweight because I have put on a few kilo's but I cant avoid being broadsided by a giant moth the size of seagull.

The pain is intense when I feel my left hip shatter and I fall to the ground in agony.

The moths are flying around the living room in a frenzy and some even fly into the drywall leaving holes the size of tennis balls.

I struggle to my knees, grit my teeth to mask the pain but the effort is all too much and I crash to the floor and when I look at my hip I yelp in agony because a bone has broken through the skin and l know that I am in deep trouble.

One of the seagull sized moths slams into my face and I am again prostrate on the floor.

All I can do is roll over onto my back in an attempt to ease my pain and hope that the moths just go and leave me alone but I know that that is wishful thinking.

Most of the moths have gone but around ten gather around me on the carpet then fly back and forth covering me in gossamer threads and soon I am covered from head to toe with only my face left exposed.

One of the mutant moths lands on my upper chest and we look at each other eye to eye.

The moth probes my neck a few times with its proboscis before ramming it in.

I am now wrapped tightly in a cocoon with no means of escape plus my insides will soon turn into a soupy mush ready for the moths to feast on whenever they choose.

My eyes close and I begin to drift away.

THE END

Part Two coming soon.