#cause i'll be 26 in 5 months

[jackredfieldwasmyjacob]

just found out that you cannot get a european health card if you 1) are under 26 years old (you need a tutor) and 2) you don't have a job (in this case my mum who is my tutor)

[speedycoffeedelight]

An Animalistic Disaster

Summery: You come across something you never expected.

(A.n: Buckle up everyone, cause this and the next chapter are going to be a little dark. I swear crack and fluff are on their way!)

Tw: Murder, details of murder,animal death and blood

CH-5 : Could this day get any worse?

You slowly walked up to the spider, examining it. The spider was also looking at you with its..mismatched eyes? Are spiders supposed to have mismatched eyes? The spider was almost as big as your plam. It had a pink heart shaped fur on its back.'Huh, that's cute..' you thought. You still weren't a big fan of spiders. Though nor did you like to kill them. "I'll...just leave you be for now I guess?" You said while awkwardly scratching your neck. You didn't want to risk getting it outside for it to jump on you. Having the cockroach jump on you was enough for one day. As long as it didn't do any funny stuff, you should be fine right?

You walked back to your chair, Keeping a cautious eye on the spider. Part of you believed looking at it intimidatingly will make it fear you and not come close. As you sat on the chair, you could almost swear the spider rolled it's eyes at your antics but you were probably just imagining it.

"Alrighty then..time to get to work!" You said to yourself. You decided to put some songs as your background music while you worked. Picking up your phone, you started the first song that came up, which was 'Inside of every demon is a rainbow' from hazbin hotel.

You found out about Hazbin Hotel about a few months ago and it has been living rent free in your head since then. Luckily enough, it's first season will air in a couple weeks and you absolutely couldn't wait to watch it. You adored the whole crew, especially alastor. You were kind of a simp for him to be completely honest. You also listened to hunicast's past hazbin hotel live streams too. They absolutely made you lose your shit from laughing sometimes and sometimes made you melt like a puddle with their flirting. You sorta could understand Ashley's pain. You were sad that you didn't find the live streams sooner.

You started to work while humming with the song. This time you had to edit some drafts about a murderer on loose that's terrorising everyone recently. His name was apparently Elias Adler. He was in 26-29 year old range. He had long blonde hair, and bags under his blue eyes. He also had a piercing on his ear. Police hasn't been able to catch him yet. But they did manage to catch one of his accomplices. They learnt about his name from there.

Unfortunately they couldn't get any other information out of him since Elias wouldn't share any personal information with them. Police suspected the guy was just a another tool for him to get what he wanted. He has committed 16 confirmed murders till now. They were able to identify the murders being done by him due to how violent the scenes were. Bloods and guts everywhere, head half separated from the torso, multiple stab wounds and more.

Police were close to catching him one time. But he slipped them, though it cost him a bullet in his left arm. He was last seen about a couple of kilometres away in a town from where you are currently. Police are searching everywhere currently to catch this man. Police promised large amounts of money if anyone could give them any clue about this man. You sighed, people could be so rotten sometimes in this world....you prayed from the bottom of your heart for this man to be caught as soon as possible.

Somewhere,a man inside a van sneezed as he was patching up his wounds. "For fucks sake, I don't need to catch cold right now" he cursed.

As you started to edit the next topic of your work. You failed to notice all the animals inside the room freaking out about the song you blasted .'How..how is this possible..' Charlie whispered as she heard her song from her recent interview come up. Never in her whole life she expected her song to be played on earth.

Others were freaking out too. Vaggie quickly flew in front of your phone to check what was going on. 'Is this us...? Why do we look so.. cartoony? This is from 'Hazbin Hotel?? How do they know what we are working with??' Vaggie screamed. 'Does that mean people are spying on us??' Niffty asked. 'But hey this could be good guys! What if we convinced them that we are actually these demons. Then she could help us figure something out right?' Charlie said with hope.

'And ya think this girl will take kindly to know that she has four demons under her roof? Hah, that's the fastest way for us to get kicked out toots' Angel snickered from the back. 'Although I hate to admit it, Angel is right about it hon.' Vaggie said flying back to Charlie. 'She would just get freaked out more. We need more time to decide what to do. Especially since somehow we are... cartoon characters on earth. She might not believe us'

Charlie looked at you humming and singing her song with delight, then back at Vaggie. 'I..suppose you're right.. let's wait to see where this goes!' Charlie said with enthusiasm. Though a part of Charlie's heart felt a bit warm seeing you liking her song so much, especially since how she was treated for the song after the interview.

You worked about 2 hours before you decided it was time to take a break. Taking a big stretch, you closed your laptop and stood up to make a cup of coffee. You let out a yelp to find out that all the animals are standing right beside your chair together, except the puppy. You didn't even notice when the spider came down and sat beside your chair. You carefully tip toed around the spider, not wanting to set it off and went to the kitchen.

After taking your coffee and spending your time doing random stuff, it was already afternoon. You decided it would be nice to go out for a walk. Also the sheep could use some fresh grass to eat from outside.

You packed some snacks in a bag and also your drawing pad in case you felt like drawing outside. Then your eyes came into contact with your pocket knife and a pepper spray in the drawer. You used to keep them just to be safe while walking around alone in town at night. You wondered if you should take them. After thinking for a bit, you shrugged, why not, better safe than sorry, even kinda in the middle of nowhere.

Wearing your bag, you picked up the puppy and called out to your ewe as you opened the door. The ewe came running after you. The moth came too and again sat on your head. You locked your door and looked at the ewe only to find the spider was sitting on its fur. You walked around for a bit and then sat on a side of a field and watched while the sheep and the puppy were running and playing with each other. A small smile came to your lips as you picked up your tab to draw a quick sketch of the adorable sight in front of you.

Suddenly a cat approached the puppy and the sheep, mewing loudly. They both stopped playing and started to listen to it. Within seconds they rushed to you. The puppy started to bite and drag your pants leg.

"Ow,hey,hey, what's going on?" You said standing up. The puppy barked at you and ran a bit ahead and stopped to look at you. You took it as a sign that it wanted you to follow something. You began to follow the puppy who was now running alongside an old looking cat. You were weirded out of your mind but decided to push it away, what if the puppy found its owner and wanted to show you. After walking through the woods for some time, both the cat and the puppy stopped in front of a large bush. The puppy started growling and the cat started hissing. The sheep which was following you stopped behind you too. It was like they all sensed some kinda danger in front of them.

Giving them a worried glance you walked in front, pushing the bush out of your way, you came across a sight you never expected to see in a million years.

There was the big deer from before. Now its body was painted with red and had a lot of wounds. In its antlers were some pink gooey looking things covered in blood that you guessed were the guts of some of the wolves that were lying in the ground right now. It looked tired and almost ready to give out at any moment. The ground around them was splattered with blood as well. There were only two wolves left standing. One of the wolves was closing in on the deer, while the other locked eyes with you and started coming your way.

You could feel your heart beat out of your chest as you clutched your bag tightly. How the hell did you fall into this situation??

(A.N: In any case you guys don't know hunicast, I highly recommend checking it out!! Especially to alastor simps, check out hunicast's alastorcast, I promise you won't regret it~)

Master list

[kriffingstars]

Johnny MacTavish; rule breaker

pairing: Johnny MacTavish x Price!Reader summary: You're practically delivered to Johnny, you can't blame a man warnings: verrrrrry slight age gap (I imagine reader to be around 20, Johnny is 26), allusions to sex ;) a/n: You guys!!! I've loved your asks SO much. Hopefully this little interaction tides you over until part two :)

Price's Niece Masterlist

You're in Edinburgh, for a conference at the university about how modern technology can assist in the renovation process of old pieces of art, the case studies being used are newly found renaissance paintings.

It's the middle of the fringe festival, so you were only able to get accommodation for the day before your conference, planning to get the 5-hour train back to London, and then the train home after it had ended.

It's sod's law when after an interesting but long day, all the trains are cancelled. Torrential rain has caused major flooding, and now you're stranded, soaking and without a way to get home.

Price isn't expecting a call from you so early, but after you explain your predicament he transfers you enough for a decent room and tells you he'll sort you out a train, or flight home in the morning.

Unfortunately, luck really isn't on your side because of course everything besides some really sketchy AirBnb is booked. You really don't want to stay there on your own. If you were with your uni friends it would be different, but it was just you who went to the conference, the rest of them more interested in curating than restoration.

Begrudgingly, you call your Uncle once again and explain what's happening. You know he's busy, he's been in meetings all day and you know he's had to step out to answer your call.

Gritted teeth, he tells you he'll sort it, and calls you back a few minutes later.

"Soap's coming to grab you, find a pub and get yourself something to eat on me. I'll give him a text to let him know where you are."

This really isn't the solution he wanted, but your safety is paramount and there's no way he's letting you sleep anywhere potentially dangerous.

The stars aligned in the most infuriating way, practically delivering you to the man he wanted you to stay away from. Soap had too much leave to use up, and so he was taking an extra week at home.

It's far from ideal, and he once again, reminds Soap that he's expecting no funny business.

"Aye Captain, best behaviour I promise." his scottish drawl mumbles through the phone as he hears am engine start.

"I'll even take the sofa."

That does nothing to ease the stress, that the two of you are inadvertently causing him.

It's gone nine by the time Johnny get's to you, the rain still hasn't let up, and he jogs, bag in hand through the front door.

"Bonnie! It's been a while," he greets as he wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a giant bear hug.

And it has, your communication had dropped in in the last couple of months. Both of you becoming busy, and texts that were once answered straight away lie unread.

He's warm and firm and practically engulfing you. He also smells really good.

"Jesus, you're freezing," he notes as he pulls back, cupping your hands in his as he blows on them to get the heat back into your digits.

Johnny makes it way too difficult to not like him. It's like telling you not to imagine an elephant. The more you tell yourself not to do it, the more you do.

He's kind, funny, charming and ridiculously handsome.

It's even harder when he swaps your bag for his, telling you there's some warm, dry clothes for you if you want to change before you head back to his.

In the bathroom you dig out the clothes, the t-shirt is one of his work ones, with the SAS insignia embroidered on the chest, the same one your Uncle wears. That's not what stops you in your tracks though, it's not the sweats either. It's the zip up hoodie, this one isn't army issue. It's well worn and smells absolutely divine, there's a few smells mixed in together but it's overwhelmingly him.

You lift the collar to your nose, breathing it in again and your chest flutters slightly.

Your Uncle's warnings bounce around your head as you leave the stall, and make your way back to the bar.

They also leave your head as soon as Johnny looks up at you, eyes lighting up and smile softening as he sees you dressed in his clothes. You've still got your hat on, covering your damp hair.

You Price's and your bloody hats he thinks when you get close enough again for him to tuck you into his side, as he leads you to his car.

All to warm you up though, he's simply making sure you're not going to get ill. There's definitely no other reason at all that he wants you as close as possible.

"Thank you again, I don't know what I'd have done if you weren't here to rescue me," It's not meant to be flirty, you're genuinely just relaying your gratitude.

But Johnny lives to serve, his whole life is built around that and he thinks that he'd come and rescue you wherever because the way you're looking up at him is sending him haywire.

No funny business. Yes Sir.

The hour drive back to his flat flies by. It reminds the both of you when you first met, and you don't let him forget how he properly put his foot in his mouth.

"We even look similar!" you shriek as he tries to justify why he thought that a trophy wife was the correct conclusion to come to about your identity.

"Nah, you're too pretty to look like him," Johnny doesn't think before he speaks, but he's glad he didn't this time, because when glances over at you as he checks his mirror he's greeted with you wearing his clothes, face hot, and eyes already looking at him.

It really should be illegal for him to rest his forearm on the ledge next to the window as he drives, one hand on the wheel, the other on the gearstick.

"Nearly here now," is all he says, and you hum in response.

Despite living in a new build, the flat is relatively cosy. Maybe it's just the giant 'L' shaped sofa in the corner that looks like you could sink onto and sleep for days on.

"You take the bed, I'll be just on the sofa if you need anything. Bathroom's that way, toothpaste's in the cabinet above the sink."

He was really looking after you, when he stopped for petrol he grabbed you a tooth brush and some make-up wipes, as well as a packet of your favourite sweets.

He really is making it hard, when he's so thoughtful.

Settling down for the night happens pretty quickly, he leads you into his room. Shows you where the phone charger is and grabs a pair of sweats for himself to change into.

Sinking into his sheets felt so wrong, when you thought about lying in his bed it was never like this. Usually, it involved you under him, trapped between the mattress and his frame as he pulled ungodly noises from your throat. Instead you've got a pretty thin duvet, the man you want as your blanket is sleeping soundly on his sofa.

You don't bother to check the time before leaving the confines of Johnny's bedroom, your throat dry after spending far too long thinking of what you wish he'd do to you.

Creeping as silently as possible down the hallway, you make it to the kitchen, without stirring too much noise from your gracious host.

Unfortunately, Johnny didn't tell you where he kept his glasses, it felt invasive to go rummaging but needs must.

"What you looking for, Bon" Johnny mutters, scaring the ever-loving daylights out of you.

With a shriek, you leap into the air before whirling around. If you thought your heart was beating fast, it's beating faster now because he's shirtless in front of you, sweats hanging low on his hips and he's speaking in the sexiest sleep-filled voice.

You don't even noticing him walk towards you until he's standing right there. Christ, he really is toned.

"I-eh...a glass," your garbled response makes him let out a small huff of air as a smile breaks out over his face.

And if you didn't think that you could become more of a mess, he leans even closer and reaches a hand behind your head to grab the cursed object.

Your faces are inches apart, his nose grazing yours so gently you question if it was even there. In this light, his eyes are darker than usual, and his eyelashes seem a lot thicker as his blinks begin to slow. Your gaze flutters down to his lips, and you can't help but reach up to trace the scar with your fingertips.

When your gaze reaches his eyes again, you're already ruined. He's looking directly at your lips, tongue darting out as he swipes at his.

It's you who makes the first move, capturing him in a searing kiss. The flutters in your stomach have moved their way up to your eardrums, where they pound to be let out.

The kiss is all-consuming, your arms wrap around his neck finding anchor in the hair at the base of his neck. His arms have you pinned in, one snaking around your waist and finding refuge on the small of your back, pulling you closer and the other tenderly cupping your cheek.

"We shouldn't," he whispers breaking the kiss, but instead of backing away like you thought you would he dives in again. More passionate and with more tongue this time, teeth catching the bottom of your lip.

"I promised your old man I wouldn't," once again he pulls away, cupping your face, as leaves open mouth kisses down your neck, stopping to nip at your pulse point, before soothing it with his tongue.

"Johnny," you breathe, chest heaving. He lets out a growl against your throat which sends vibrations all the way south.

"He doesn't have to know."

[tossawary]

Okay, I haven't finished "Episode 5: Rise From The Ashes" of "Ace Attorney" and I'm not very far into it, so please, no one spoil it for me. (I want to try and worldbuild out of this with the information that I have.) But Lana Skye being the Chief Prosecutor is... weird to me. (As is Miles Edgeworth being the "High Prosecutor", honestly, whatever that means exactly.)

I had been under the impression that the Chief Prosecutor was corrupt, due to an interaction with Redd White in "Turnabout Sisters". I'll put the relevant dialogue from that episode under a cut. It's not clearly stated, but I think it's heavily implied that Redd White has something on the Chief Prosecutor. Maybe it'll be revealed that Lana Skye is corrupt and/or was being blackmailed by Redd White, or something like that? That would be fine. I'm not against it turning out that Lana Skye was actually committing crimes.

I mainly think that Lana Skye is... WAY too young for this position. Like, this is breaking my suspension of disbelief a little. Miles being a fearsome prosecutor at 24 is already pushing it, but I'm familiar with the Teenage Genius trope, so I'll go with it. But a CHIEF PROSECUTOR at, what, 26?! No. Lana Skye could be 36 and I would still think that she's pretty young for her position. Even if Lana Skye finished law school at 20, on a similar timeline as Miles Edgeworth, she would have less than 10 years of experience, and she's been put in charge of the entire department?!

I'll believe that Lana Skye might be incredibly intelligent, hard-working, and ambitious. Maybe because of the whole "absurdly accelerated court timelines" element, she's already worked an impressive amount of cases. (But her seniors would have also done this?) But this still stands out to me as a premature promotion and I think it can be connected to the previous case with Redd White.

My current headcanon is that there was a different Chief Prosecutor during the Mia Fey murder case, who was being blackmailed by Redd White, and that Redd White's trial underearthed evidence of corruption that caused several scandals for both the prosecution office and the police. That Chief Prosecutor and several others were forcibly retired or even arrested, reducing the number of more senior prosecutors, causing both Miles Edgeworth and Lana Skye to be promoted beyond their years and their management experience. Possibly even because someone else is setting Lana Skye up for a glass cliff fall here when further corruption comes to light. In this scenario, she's only been the Chief Prosecutor for a few months at most, and it's not unreasonable that Phoenix Wright wouldn't recognize her.

Alternatively, perhaps Redd White arranged for the early retirement of some senior prosecutors and Lana Skye was promoted out of that mess, and she was (recently, because she's in her damn 20s) the Chief Prosecutor at the time of Mia Fey's murder. Maybe Redd White provided Lana with (fabricated?) information to win some past cases, in order to create some dirt that he could hold over her, and now Lana is at the very least stuck with the guilt of having accepted help from a man who later murdered Mia Fey, if she wasn't actively being blackmailed. Maybe Mia Fey only started investigating Redd White in the first place because she noticed something was wrong / off with Lana!

Alternatively again, maybe Redd White didn't have dirt on Lana Skye at all, but simply knew how badly she wanted the Mia Fey murder case solved, because as an information broker, he was aware of the past connection between Lana and Mia. Or maybe Lana has no significant connection to Redd White and this is just a minor continuity error (in my opinion / interpretation) on the game's part. Which is fine, I guess. I'll just think it's a lost opportunity on the game's part not to try to tie everything together in an emotionally compelling way.

To reiterate: no spoilers on what the actual situation with Lana Skye is, please. I'll get there when I get there.

Dialogue from "Turnabout Sisters" in which Redd White has a phone conversation with the then-unknown Chief Prosecutor:

White: We won't be needing an escort for Mr. Wrong. Instead, please connect me to the public prosecutor's office.

Interphone [Of course, sir. One moment please…] … [White? That you? What are you doing calling me at a time like this!?]

White: Hello. Chief Prosecutor? I've changed my mind. I want to testify tomorrow.

Interphone: [What's this about?]

White: The Mia Fey case. I witnessed the murder, you see. And, thus, as a very important witness, I would like to testify.

Interphone: [What? Why now? I thought you said you didn't want to go to court?]

White: Quietude…! I told you I changed my mind, didn't I? Oh, and one other thing. Send the police over here right away. The man is standing right in front of me. He looks dazed but could be violent!

Interphone: [What? What man?]

White: Are you even listening? The executioner! The hatchet-man! The liquidator… The killer, man!

Phoenix: What!?

Interphone: [Mr. White… this isn't another one of those…]

White: Chief Prosecutor. I do not believe you are in a position to freely offer your opinions to me, correct? I'm telling you to send the police, now!

[pinesfamilyguidetotheweird]

Gravity Falls: Northwest Generations

So, this thought had come to me when I rewatched 'Irrational Treasure' and was reminded of when Gravity Falls was found.

With the release of Journal 3 after the show ended, a looooooooooot of things got a bit retconned. And I feel like one is the number of generations in the Northwest family.

In Irrational Treasure, it was said by Pacifica that she was Nathaniel's great-great-granddaughter. So, 5 generations.

That's all well and good, so why talk about it. Well, if you wanna go with Journal 3 canonicity (I go back and forth depending on if it works narratively), Gravity Falls was founded in 1842.

170 years ago.

I don't know. This seems off to me. Like...my maternal great grandma was around up until I was 18 years old (and I still believe that heartbreak was the main cause of her death), she was in her mid-80s. Not sure about my great-great grandparents, as I never really got to learn about them (Hell, my maternal great grandma's dad was a mystery, even to her, she never knew him). But I would take a guess that whatever age they were when they had my great grandma, it wasn't close to the 170 years mark.

Basically, what I'm getting at here is that five generations hardly adds up to 170 years.

According to one website that converts years to generations, 170 years can add up to 6 generations (and this is probably taking account to the average)

I don't think it was ever stated how old Nathaniel was when he 'founded' Gravity Falls 170 years ago, but from what I see between Irrational Treasure, The Northwest Manor Mystery, and Journal 3 (all kinda different from eachother), I'd say that the man was probably in his forties in 1842.

The age of pregnancy differs, so it's hard to say about how many generations would work. I'll use my own family as an example:

I don't know how old my great grandma when she had her oldest child (my grandma), my grandma was 18 years old when she had my mom, my mom was 25 when she had my older sister, and my sister had her first child at 26 (a few months away from her 27th birthday).

Of the known ages, it adds up to 69 (or 70 if you wanna take in account of my sister's almost birthday) years to make four generations. Even if I can estimate how old my great grandma was she had my grandma (say 30s at the latest as she had two more kids after my grandma and, you know, menopause), it wouldn't have been enough to make it to the 170 year mark.

With the Journal 3 canon, there could be more than 5 generations of the Northwest family.

Now, something to keep in mind that while women loses their ability to have children due to menopause (usually in their 40s or 50s), men can remain fertile into their older years, though the rate does still decrease.

Not sure if I wanna try out and guessimate the number of generations in the Northwest family.

I can try if I can get 25 likes on this.

[sir-fluffbutts]

Have you ever thought abt this?... You and ur sponsors and ur patrons can make a movie or a series abt ur characters!! Since ur oc's stories r like related to each other and there's a lot of cool stuff happening (Fb be like wtf bro is this cool seriously) it will totally work out what do u say lol

saw some similar asks (me doing a series) in there so

HONESTLY??? I WISH, I REALLY DO 😭

theres currently 3 main storys going on in my head which is the

• axolotls story (chiffon/latte and ect)

• fish market story (pepper,achii,kenny ect)

• anger cafe story (blossom,valentine and backbite)

and i think the angel cafe one would be the most sutible for a series as its the least serious one, BUT THE THING IS, IDK if i can pull it off

------------

animation takes FOREVER if its a one person project, i literaly have to dissapear for +2 months for a 3 minute video and 1/3 of it isn't even animated. youtube didn't really like it when you upload nothing for a long periods of time :(

it also takes money to do that, not just for my living fees but also for voice actors and music artists at LEAST

so lets say i'll be making a 8 minute pilot with 14 aninators, 5 conposers, 3 music/sound designers and 4 voice actors, even just that that'll be more then 10000$ to pay 26 people+my own living costs, and then it can absolutly flop cause i was busy with this for +4 months and youtube hates that 😭

tldr: i really would love to but i need money for it which i don't have and even if i do, theres a 1/2 chance it'll flop

---------

plus angel cafe characters and my hell concept in general has been CONSTENTLY been compaired with hazbin hotel/helluva boss series ever since i intoduced the characters and its really just 🫠

[kairiscorner]

bc i have no life, i made (and will expand):

dialogue prompts list or something

REMINDERS! imma use these on fics if y'all want, though you guys can use these too for your own fics, just make sure to give me credit and tag me, attaching a link to this post is also appreciated if you use this ^^

(btw, i can also repeat some prompts, though please be patient, i might not be able to post so much this month ^^'')

1.) "you're a bad influence on me, y'know that?" (miles 1610)

2.) "yeah, i risked my skin saving you. i don't care if you wouldn't do the same for me, i'm not you."

3.) "mind using your eyes AND brain next time?"

4.) "my heart beats all the time, shouldn't be a big deal, but i can't help but notice how loud the beating is when you're around." (teen!gojo)

5.) "never really understood poetry, but when i read a few lines from this... you were the image that came out of the words." (noir)

6.) "if you really wanted to drive me insane... you'd hold my hand for more than 5 seconds, then you'll see me insane with love." (noir)

7.) "please, for the love of GOD, never shut up."

8.) "my hands are cold... wait, what are you doing, i thought you brought mitt--never mind, this is nice."

9.) "something tells me you aren't happy about it. and something tells me you'll be angrier if i keep asking. it's okay, take your time. just know i'll be right here for you."

10.) "if you can't believe me, then i'll have to show you that i'm serious about you."

11.) "sometimes, you don't have to worry about loving me enough--you do that too much already. what you should worry about... is giving me too much love that you forget who you're supposed to be loving first: you."

12.) "man, after 5 shots of whiskey and a good laugh, i think i've made up my mind--you're gonna be the one i'll marry." "we just met." "and i just fell for you."

13.) "they came to get their shit back without even getting their shit together, how nice."

14.) "i would've thrown a brick in your window if you didn't answer, and y'know, i was going to, but then i remembered you hated getting stuff on your carpet so i left and did it in my mind."

15.) "i want a platypus. and yes, i want you, too."

16.) "your place is filthy." "it's gonna be yours too, one day." "you mean ours."

17.) "why are my eyes gross right now?" "it's... you're crying." "nu-uh." "y'need a tissue?" "yes please"

18.) "you're so stupid, and reckless, and a literal danger to my very way of life--and yet i love you to bits!"

19.) "if i could just go back in time and see you again, maybe then i'd tell myself to love you for a long, long time. even if i never knew it at the time, i regret all the years we've lost together, i regret living my life without you in it."

20.) "now before you ask why i beat the shit out of him in the locker rooms, it was because he was gonna ask you out before i could, okay?" (soccer captain!miguel)

21.) "i am a fully grown adult. i am capable, i am independent, i am strong-willed." "and you lose your shit when you see me come home with a mcdonalds' kiddie meal."

22.) "nobody loves me..." "..." "ahem, i said, NOBODY LOVES ME" "and i'm nobody?" "yay"

23.) "i just wanna bash their head in, but... it's so distracting. their eyes get me lost and i'm, i'm out of it."

24.) "man, they're a lost cause. and yet i keep busting my ass trying to save them. i love being your spouse and curse being your spouse, dammit."

25.) "i wanna kiss... right now... but my spouse'll... hate me." "i am your spouse." "oh damn, then you'll... hate me if i... if i kiss your pretty face, love..."

26.) "go to bed right now." "no." "i guess i'll give your plushie all my kisses." "ok on my way."

27.) "again, would it be me or them? me who's been with you this whole time, me who's took you in when you're so used to being refused, me who's... who's loved you, all this time?"

28.) "where are my--" "keys? here, scatterbrain." "damn, i'm so glad i married you."

29.) "kids, go to your room." "as your co-parent, i say protect me from the dragon about to breathe fire on me."

30.) "i may be his wife, but i'm not his lover."

31.) "i think you have me confused for someone else."

32.) "it's because i care about you that i push myself away, don't you get that?"

33.) "we'll never be okay again, will we...?"

34.) "the noises in my head keep getting louder and louder and louder, but only you... only you help calm them down."

35.) "oh, i get it, fine. i'll fuck off."

36.) "i want that though." "it's a waste of money." "you got it for me anyway."

37.) "how could you say i don't love you when all my life, you're all i come home to and kiss a good morning and good night?"

38.) "what a stupid man i married."

39.) "don't... fucking move... not unless you want me to do it..."

40.) "you went in my ROOM?"

41.) "i accidentally broke the bed."

42.) "i love you." "what?" "ah fuck, i mean, i'll see you."

43.) "GOD, I HATE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH." "is that why you draw you and them kissing together all the time?"

44.) "i can make a mean burned down house and scorched lawn."

45.) "i'll admit it, fine, i can't win your heart. because your heart isn't any prize to be won, you're not an object. you're... you're you. and i LOVE you."

46.) "what, why're you staring? can't handle how hot i am?" "no, it's just that you've got a shit-eating grin on your face i'd love to punch off you."

47.) "i actually hate summer vacation... i won't be able to see you everyday for 3 whole months."

48.) "ooh, you drank from my cup, you know what this means, we had an indirect kiss."

49.) "just tell your crush you like them already and stop being a big baby about this." "okay, fine. i like you." "wait--"

50.) "i know it looks stupid, but... i tried."

51.) "it's funny, because i had you in mind while making it."

52.) "you think infinity is real, or... are we just living every day hoping tomorrow will come, despite all odds?"

53.) "you're so fucking stupid...! stupid, stupid, stupid... why did you... dammit, why?"

54.) "i don't even know who i share my bed with anymore."

55.) "bite me and get what you want, what we both want."

56.) "we'll never have to see each other again after this."

57.) "quit making promises you can't keep."

58.) "tell me to shut up one more time. go, i'm waiting."

59.) "ah, sorry, i... oh, your hand's really soft."

60.) "what are you doing?" "just capturing the moment in my mind when i'm with the most perfect person in the whole multiverse."

61.) "and you know what your problem is? you can't stand seeing me happy, that's your fucking problem."

[nextinline-if]

Next in Line - Interactive Fiction

itch.io page | Tumblr | Ask me anything | FAQs (Previous Asks + Prompts)

Next in Line is an interactive fiction in development. It was originally planned as a visual novel. (I am still updating to remove visual novel references across social media, apologies). So, while most of the writing for the demo is complete, I am currently revising it to better fit the interactive fiction format, as well as to give players more agency. The game will be free.

You're next in line for the throne of Castelon, a fictional country very loosely inspired but not based on the ancient and medieval worlds. Particularly, Ancient Rome, Ancient Greece, and periods of England.

Shortly after the war ended and a month before your 21st birthday, you received a hastily written letter at the compound in the mountains, where your parents had sent you at 16 to keep you away from the war.

"King dead. James abdicated. You are Next in Line."

Your country is reeling from its King's death and the end of a decade-long war. Today, on your 21st birthday, you begin the timeless tradition of sharing the responsibility of running Castelon for the next year, alongside your mother, Queen Vivian. This tradition, known as The Harbinger Ceremony, is your opportunity to prove your ability to be a reliable ruler.

Prepare to step into a story about love, trust, and finding oneself. Can you navigate your royal duties, solve your father's murder, and find love (or friendship) at the same time? Or, will the Gods withdraw their blessing from you?

Next in Line will be rated Mature. Player direction advised. Please do not play or plan to play if you feel this game could cause any harm to you, or your emotional, or mental wellbeing. If you have questions about the content, please let me know and I'll do my best to answer!

Content will include:

Possible violence

Suggestive language and themes

Optional sexual content (will be skippable or avoidable)

References to war and the effects of war

Death and/or references to death

Some exploration of grief

Language that might be offensive - aka swear / curse words

Some bad possibly unfavorable endings that might make you hate me

Subject to change. Changes will be communicated.

Anticipated Demo Release: Late July / August 2022 (most likely August)

Demo Features:

Prologue Part 1, Prologue Part 2, Chapter 1

Choose your gender (M, F, NB), pronouns, first name, hair color, eye color

Shape the MC's future and some of their past.

Pursue romance or friendship with various characters. See characters further down this post.

Players will not choose sexual orientation - it's up to you to pursue romance if you want or simply don't. All currently planned ROs (3) are romanceable by any MC. Note: there are no poly routes available.

Romance is optional in the game. Although, it should be noted this was originally planned as a romance game so there will be a lot of optional romance content.

3 Family Mottos (based on an early choice) that will unlock various choices throughout the game.

A taste of the "Attributes" system- a personality system that unlocks additional choices throughout the game; my aim here is to make the game replayable in a refreshing way. What kind of Heir will you be?

Full Game Features:

Everything listed above, plus...

Chapters 2-14;

Characters may disapprove or become upset or angry by some of your choices - this does not prevent MC from romance. Like reality, everyone in MC's life is not always going to agree with them.

At least 5 holidays that offer opportunities to honor the gods, further relationships, or simply have a good time;

Optional sexual content;

At least 6 endings;

An extensive stats screen where you can read about yourself, your relationship with others, and the world around you.

Chapters 2-13 will each cover the span of one month. The full game will follow roughly a year of the MC's life as The Harbinger.

Features are subject to change at my discretion.

Sir Constantine Dimas [M], 26 years old, Taurus

Constantine is a Knight in Castelon's Elite Guard. He's fiercely loyal to your family and especially your twin brother, James, who he fought alongside during the Arandale War. Like you, he finds amusement in teasing your brother.

"You're not too different from your twin, both reckless royals, so you probably need someone to care for you."

F. Faramund [M/F], 22 years old, Aquarius

F is someone from your past, from before you were sent to the compound in the mountains. They broke your heart and disappeared. Whether that was heartbreak in a platonic or romantic way is up to you. Now, they're back and seemingly apologetic. Bury the hatchet, rekindle your former relationship or walk a different path altogether.

"Love and war... they both certainly know how to cause us pain."

Lady Margaret [F], 22 years old, Gemini

The mysterious Lady Margaret is a noble businesswoman who enjoys observing from the shadows. You know little about her, but she could prove to be a powerful ally, if you play your cards right.

"I can think of many ways to consume your time."

This is not an exhaustive list of characters - but some key players.

Prince James Verissimo [M], 21 years old

Your twin brother was next in line to the throne. Until he wasn't. His abdication took you by surprise. While you were sent to the compound in the mountains during the war, your twin was sent to war. You and your brother were close growing up, but it's up to you how your relationship plays out moving forward.

Queen Vivian Verissimo [F], 45 years old

Your mother, the Queen of Castelon, is a cunning and nosy woman. As a child, your father was the affectionate one, while your mother was the parent who wanted to ensure you understood the realities of the world. It was a surprise when she agreed with your father to send you away from the war. Perhaps she knew you would play an important role one day.

Lady Anna [F], 20 years old

Anna is your best friend and attendant. Where you go, she goes. She came to the palace as an orphaned child of a minor noble house. Anna is the constant in your life - the one person you've always been able to rely on. She might have a crush on your brother.

Felix Faramund [M], 24 years old

F.'s slightly older brother. Like F., he's returned to Castelon. Unlike F., Felix can be quick to anger and he's not afraid to speak his mind. He can read the room, he just doesn't care. You once considered him a friend.

Oracle Davina [F], ??? years old

Davina holds one of the most revered positions in the Kingdom - the voice of the gods. Her duties include overseeing The Harbinger Ceremony and serving on the Royal Council.

[ask-the-sagents]

Ask the Agents Masterpost

This is gonna be the post for pretty much everything about the universe and the characters. It'll be updated on occasion and will remain pinned on my profile - more under the cut:

Edit: I wrote this before side order/splatoon 3 so consider it an AU

Discord Server

Character Pages

Start Reading Here!

Askblog Stuff

The idols will be available for questions sometimes, but not all the time. I'll make a post and update the askbox with whoever is available for questions currently.

Magic Anons are allowed!

Posts will be on Wednesdays and Saturdays - will be a mix of answering random questions and small comics to continue the plot.

If a main character (3,4,5,8)is unavailable, you can still ask them questions, but they won't answer it til after they get back

If a character is available but spotty, it just means they may or may not answer certain questions for the time being.

World Info

The Idols:

Marie - Age: 30 - she/her - bisexual

Callie - Age: 30 - she/they - pansexual, trans

Pearl - Age: 27 - they/she - Lesbian, nonbinary

Marina - Age: 24 - she/her - lesbian

Deep Cut - Coming soon!

Marina and Pearl got married about a year ago (Marina, 23; Pearl, 26)

General World Info:

In the beginning, it takes place 6 months after the events of Octo Expansion

Spawn points don't exist outside of Turf Wars/Ranked battles

Octavio has been captured and currently resides in a high security prison

NSS:

Octavio had used sanitization and hypnosis as a tool for control and punishment - he was ruthless even to his own citizens.

To their knowledge, there are no more hypnotized octolings.

Their current goal is to find out where all of the sanitized octolings are coming from, helping to acclimate octolings to the surface, and helping to establish a working government to the citizens below the surface who are too afraid to leave.

Captain Cuttlefish is retired, NSS is run by Marie and Callie.

There's a temporary camp set up for octolings new to the surface - they make sure any injuries are taken care of and help them acclimate to the surface. They stay in the camp until homes are found for them, which usually takes just a couple weeks.

Marina and Pearl are agents 6 and 7, however their role is much smaller and mainly help on the side of helping misplaced octolings find homes.

Inkling/Octoling Stuff:

They take more after the human side

They bleed actual blood instead of ink

Everybody has a limiter, which is a chip installed in their arm. Without this, they could use up too much ink when battling and possibly die due to their bodies not being able to keep up with production. When low on ink, their tentacles will become extremely dull and lose almost all color. They'll become extremely weak and lethargic until their hearts finally stop.

They have more flexible bones, but they can still break

Inklings and Octolings gain their squid/octo form around puberty - they are in human form up until then

They cannot be in saltwater but can in other types. It takes about 5 minutes of being in saltwater for someone to dissolve

Ink burns are rare but can happen. It's caused by consistent exposure to enemy ink in a single area or an extremely strong shot. They can be painful but they will heal and fade over time - they turn blue in color despite the color of the enemy ink.

When a cephalopod feels intense feelings of romantic love for their partner, their ink color will subconsciously change to match their partner's.

They cannot fall asleep while in squid/octo form; if they do, they will change back automatically.

They have to use special shears to cut their tentacles or else it would be painful.

Octolings only have some control over their tentacles, and usually, their tentacles can give hints to their mood. Typically, the older they get, the more control they have, but this isn't always the case.

Inklings and octolings reach full maturity in their 20s-30s. This is where they develop a secondary color at the tip of their tentacles and octolings will also have their hands matching their ink color.

They can get grey ink due to age or extreme stress or anxiety

this will be updated as more information becomes available!

Updated hylian Font chart

Hylian Font chart (old, ignore this one!)

[potential-fate]

Sims Tag

Tagged by @andrevasims ~~

Tagging: uhm... idk this was quite long, so I don't wanna tag anyone, so I'm not going to.

anyways, my answers under a readmore, cause they're 26 questions.

1.What’s your favourite sims death?

there's so many funny deaths in ts2, but I rarely see them (I can't help it I like keeping my sims alive lmao....) I have seen the satellite death only twice in.... almost 20 years? Also think murphy bed death is pretty entertaining. oh, and that sims can spontaneously combust if too warm.

2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match?

funny I was just talking about this with @nappe-plays-the-sims on discord. My style is definitely maxis mix/semi-realistic. I think it'd probably be fully alpha in ts4 though, if my computer could handle it. but for ts2, I don't like how a lot of alpha cc looks, so it stays squarely in the mix category.

3.Do you cheat when your sims gain weight?

hm. mostly not? there are certain sims that don't fit personality wise and I've cheated (in both directions both fat loss and gain) sheerly because their fitness just barely dipped and it didn't make sense. also as a storytelling simblr, I need consistency, so sometimes I'll cheat it for the moment, but then return them to their new fit/fat state once I have a bit of a time lapse.

4. Do you use move objects?

literally constantly. I mean, I have to to pose scenes, but also decoration in my game is ridiculously off grid so 🤷‍♀️

5. Favorite mod?

I legitimately don't think I can pick one. I have like 200 'curated' mods that I have mostly been using for literally a decade. Even in my "cc free" game I still have my mods folder and my defaults in. That being said, if forced to, I wouldn't be able to live without ACR/Romantic Standards, and the Traits Project.

6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got?

Glamour Life Stuff, but I pretty much followed the release date for ts2. for TS4, the entire reason I redownloaded the game was Cottage Living so... that one.

7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing?

Live as in 'we are Live 🎬" (because literally that's how I always pictured it. the game is in action now, it's live.)

8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?

uhm.... probably Evren, though no one has seen much of him yet. I just think he's pretty.

9. Have you made a simself?

I have.... about 12 years ago. and that sim can stay back there LMAO.

10. What sim traits do you give yourself?

hm. I suppose Gloomy, Maker, Socially Awkward. it took me a while to decide though.

11. Which is your favorite EA hair color?

in ts2, I guess the red is okay? idk there's a reason all my hair is defaulted.

in ts4, I specifically like the light blonde and the dirty blonde, but would like to set the one labeled "blonde" (the yellow one) on fire.

12. Favorite EA hair?

see above answer. I'm just... not a fan of ts2 hairs. When I was a baby, I used to use exclusively this hair on men (like they literally all had that hair it was kinda funny), before I discovered cc. but now I think I'd probably pic Caesar if I had to.

13. Favorite life stage?

Teen through Adult. I like them all probably equally, but I spend a LOT of time at Uni 😂 I don't understand why everyone wants shorter UNI mods lmaooo.

14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

can I say neither? what you guys are playing the game???? jk jk. uhm... I guess I'll say builder, but honestly a good portion of my time is literally posing. though said scenes are normally based off gameplay. but I don't get to play that often. like ie: the story posts I'm posting now are literally based off gameplay from 6 months ago so....

15. Are you a CC creator?

Yup!~ though it's not consistent, in posting schedule or what I tend to make so 🤷‍♀️ (that being said, I do have hair retextures I'm literally planning on posting this week.)

16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad?

I feel like I do, but I don't wanna post favorites and hurt someone's feelings. 😂 that being said, there's like 3-5 people I talk to almost daily.

17. What’s your favorite game? (1, 2, 3, or 4)

in case it's not obvious, it's ts2. I do like ts4 now with all the dlc now though. but ts2 will always be my ride or die tbh.

18. Do you have any sims merch?

I... don't think so.... I'm pretty sure I don't. I would be willing though probably. I mean, I sorta want a sims tattoo, and that's a lot more permanent than merch so.

19. Do you have a YouTube for sims?

I do not. I don't really.... like youtube that much. or letsplays.... or filming myself.

20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing?

oh god. idk man, I was heavy into the whole scene kid 2008 type stuff back when I first started creating cc and stuff, let alone playing, so like.... "a lot" is really all I have. I'd like to say that it's improved? I definitely think my photo/editing skills are better.

21. What’s your Origin ID?

I want to say it's potential-x-fate but i am not 100% sure on that... I don't think I've ever shared anything for ts4 anyways though.

22. Who’s your favorite CC creator?

that depends heavily on what you're looking for. @deedee-sims, @mdpthatsme, and @serabiet for clothing come to mind.

Makeup by far is probably @lilith-sims. and JesstheEx (LJ).

Hair I do a lot of my own retextures, but @antoninko also does a lot of sunshine retextures.

For b/b I couldn't even begin to decide. I don't have as much and it's all over the place.

for TS4, like, literally 85% of my CAS is @pralinesims and I have 0 B/B so.... it's pretty much just Praline LMAO.

23. How long have you had a simblr?

technically? since 2008. I migrated here from LJ around then. but this account is newer than that, cause I used to have it as a side blog and that was not very convenient. the old account I deleted after I moved everything I wanted over. I also took a 3 year break from 2016-2019.

24. How do you edit your pictures?

Carefully. lmao. jk jk. uh.... lets see. I crop them (via my own action), apply actions (mostly other people's) depending on the scene, edit any clipping by hand painting, add in hair strands a lot of the time, and uh, then I add a 1% monochromatic noise filter, and the white border frame.

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next?

since I play ts2 this isn't really applicable. but in the magical world of Allie Gets What They Want, I'd want a fix for ts2 to allow more customizability via CAS. by that I mean, I want more slots for skin details/tattoos/etc and accessories and such like they have in ts4, but in ts2. Obviously this is theoretical. but it's the thing I miss most in ts2.

26. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far?

ahhh.... for ts2, I probably play with Uni the most, but ts2 was better at integrating gameplay elements into their EPs so I'd be hard pressed to drop any of them, even ones I "don't use" that often. (ie: nightlife came with chemistry and I'd die without it, even though I don't use any of the downtown functions often.)

[fullcry]

TRIGUN FIC PUBLICATION SCHEDULE [Spring/Summer 2023]

-Quick Notes-

I know I've been saying I'll post my publication schedule next week for the past four weeks, but here we finally are! Scroll all the way down if you're looking for the schedule. V

I'll be focusing on 3 fics this spring and summer, detailed below, though I may throw in oneshots, drabbles, and prompt fics in between scheduled updates if the mood strikes and I have the time.

"Memories on Film" will be my last direct-to-AO3 fic before I launch my Patreon Page (technically already up, just very bare bones right now). After that, all updates will hit my Patreon first and be posted to AO3 for everybody two weeks later. If you've enjoyed my Trigun fics I hope you'll consider supporting!

I'll also be posting about my Patreon page and goals for that more over on main (@spicychestnut) later this month.

If you have any questions please feel free to send me an ask! I'll do my best to get to them timely. Thanks everyone for your support so far in this (for me, anyway) new fandom! Can't wait to scream about season 2 of Stampede with you all!

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

-Fics-

"Memories on Film"

She awoke with a splitting headache, wearing Vash's jacket (and only his jacket), with Vash curled behind her wearing nothing at all. She has no memory of the night before and neither does he, but her camera might hold the secrets. | VashMeryl, TriStamp, Eventual NSFW.

"Love and Peace and Gunsmoke"

She first met him hanging upside down beneath the blazing suns of a desert sky, and should have known then that he’d turn her world upside down, too. She was a newbie reporter with an insatiable curiosity and aspirations of greatness; but time and experience can be as cruel as they can be kind, and she learns the long hard way that curiosity can lead to difficult truths, and greatness often comes at a price. | Meryl-centric, eventual VashMeryl, AU Longfic.

"Biology"

Things were tight on Ship 3, the refugee crisis taking a toll on available supplies across the planet. But Vash’s solar array held the promise of turning the tide in the fight against Knives, and with the recent discovery of long-missing ship 13 buried in the desert, they had the chance to potentially triple their resources overnight. But things never go as planned with Vash around; one mishap leads to another, and Vash and Meryl are forced to confront the feelings the Knives crisis has caused them both to bury. | VashMeryl, TriStamp, Eventual NSFW.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

-The Schedule-

Publication weekly on Saturday afternoon/evening. Patreon supporters at the $4/mo tier will get 2 week early access to updates before they're posted to AO3!

Edit: Please note there have been some changes as of early May!

Memories on Film | Ch 1: April 8 Memories on Film | Ch 2: April 15 Memories on Film | Ch 3: April 22 Memories on Film | Ch 4: April 29

Break Week: May 6

LP&G | Ch 2: May 13 (Patreon) / May 20 (Public) LP&G | Ch 3: May 20 (Patreon) / May 27 (Public)

Break Week: May 27 (Patreon) / June 10 (Public)

Biology | Ch 1: June 3 (Patreon) / June 17 (Public) Biology | Ch 2: June 10 (Patreon) / June 24 (Public) Biology | Ch 3: June 17 (Patreon) / July 1 (Public) Biology | Ch 4: June 24 (Patreon) / July 8 (Public) Biology | Ch 5: July 1 (Patreon) / July 15 (Public) Biology | Ch 6: July 8 (Patreon) / July 22 (Public) Biology | Ch 7: July 15 (Patreon) / July 29(Public) Biology | Ch 8: July 22 (Patreon) / August 5 (Public) Biology | Ch 9: July 29 (Patreon) / August 12 (Public) Biology | Ch 10: August 5 (Patreon) / August 19 (Public)

Break Week: August 12 (Patreon) / August 26 (Public)

LP&G | Ch 4: August 19 (Patreon) / September 2 (Public) LP&G | Ch 5: August 26 (Patreon) / September 9 (Public)

Fall 2023 publication schedule will be posted at the start of August!

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

-Support!-

One-time donations @ Ko-Fi Support monthly @ Patreon

.

Last Updated 5/8/23

[gohandinhand]

1, 7, 25

1. chipotle order? ugh okay not to spoil 26 but despite growing up on mexican food i have no spice tolerance, so i have a pretty basic order. either burrito or burrito bowl with extra black beans, brown rice, corn salsa, cheese, double lettuce, and guac.

7. what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium? finally my favorite question 🥰 i'm always thrilled to see cephalopods, especially octopus! any mammals they have tend to be quite interesting. but the biggest thing is anything special that aquarium has. i went to the scripps aquarium on my work trip a couple of months ago i lost my everloving mind about the little penguins - there are only 5 other aquariums in the country that have them and i've been following the new zealand national aquarium online for years because of their little penguin exhibit. thankfully by this point i'd long since ditched all my coworkers so when i finally tore myself away from the penguins after 40 minutes i immediately walked into the seadragon feeding and sat there entranced for another 25 minutes. unforch, seadragons live in low light conditions lmao

i also got to see a cookie cutter shark specimen which i was so surprised and excited abt and i did stick my hand in the cleaner shrimp touch tank because they get to opt into interacting so it was rly fun! i was also thrilled to see mola mola at the monterey bay aquarium, and the shark tunnel at the toronto ripley's aquarium had me truly & completely losing my shit with excitement, i insisted on going through multiple times. anyway sorry that turned into a recitation of cool shit i've seen, i genuinely am excited to see everything at the aquarium and i love to spend hours in there reading the placard on every single display, i'm very lucky that i get to visit so many aquariums when work is flying me around! i love them and i'm going to visit an aquarium on my birthday again this year! however i am surprisingly reserved about touch pools? i'm happy to look but idk... i know they swap the creatures out regularly so none of them get too stressed but it still doesn't feel right to me to go poke the urchin when i get plenty from looking at it. cause can't you stare at this shit for eons?

25. would you say you have good taste in music? idk about good but it's. hmmmm it's sure something. no one can figure out what it is. a couple of friends can now pretty consistently guess whether i'll like a particular song but god knows what the unifying thread is. my sister was visiting recently and i drove us around for a day trip and asked her to describe my music taste and she said 'irish folk' which is funny because i don't actually have a single irish folk song in my library? anyway angie labeled a lot of my music 'snoozers' so a lot of people probably think it's bad yeah

[dari-ede]

In the Middle of the Night: Ch 30

CHAPTER 30: Every Line in our Hands

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

Summary: As Bangtan prepares for a new chapter in their lives, they head to their private property in the forest for a songwriting workshop. As a songwriter and producer they have worked with for years, I’m asked to tag along. I was ready for the heavy workload and small amount of sleep during the workshop week. However, I wasn’t ready for the storm that came that changed my friendship with Namjoon forever.

Notes: Maya makes a decision....

Pairing: Idol!RM/Namjoon x OFC

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Rating: M (sexual scenes/sexual assault in prior chapters)

Status: Complete

Note: I haven't given it one final read-through but I wanted to post it as soon as possible. I'll probably be doing edits late in the day today or throughout the week when I finally have time. Sorry!

Warnings: a LOT of feels, talk of therapy, talk of assault

**********

- Jimin's Apartment -

I needed a break from my phone. Since arriving in Seoul a few days ago, I had been having the worst of luck. Because I hadn’t planned to be back in the country for a few more weeks, it had been a hassle getting things settled with the banks. I was usually better prepared when I traveled, but all of this had been so last minute.

It sucked having to quarantine in a home that wasn’t mine. However, I was grateful to Jimin for lending me his house for the time being. My apartment wasn’t ready, so Jimin had been my only hope. He wasn’t scheduled to get back to town for a couple more weeks. I have no idea where I would be crashing after that, but that was something I could worry about later.

Right now, I only had the energy to stress about money. And food.

I had finished almost everything edible in Jimin’s kitchen. I was running out of resources and needed the damn banks to allow me access to my accounts. Of course, they wanted me to be there in person, but it was difficult to do so in the middle of a mandatory 10-day quarantine. After landing in Seoul, which by some miracle no one leaked to the media, I came straight to Jimin’s house, tested, and was told to stay until I was cleared.

Asking for favors was not easy for me and I had asked enough of Jimin already. Messaging him about needing him to use his own funds to get me food had been embarrassing. He said he would have things delivered to me by the morning. I would just have to hold tight for the night.

My stress was causing great strain and the only thing I could think to calm myself was to set my phone down and do something else. I read a book, listened to music, and finally decided to take a long bath. I had kept my phone away on purpose.

And that had been a bad idea.

Had I kept my phone next to me, I would have gotten a heads-up from Jimin.

But I hadn’t. And now I was staring at a perfectly chiseled Adonis, at a loss for words.

This had not been part of the plan.

His splendor made me stop in my tracks as I exited Jimin’s room after showering. My eyes took in his face. His leveled, smoothed nose, his heavy-lidded eyes, and round, luscious lips couldn’t look more perfect. His jaw was set, his eyes round in an almost-wondered look.

The sudden realization that I hadn’t seen him in a month was physically catching up to me. My legs wanted to run to him. My arms wanted to wrap themselves around his shoulders. My lips wanted to claim his. My soul had missed him, but so had my body. And it was needing to make contact. It was craving him.

“What are you doing here?” he suddenly asked, his eyes glaring at me now.

I had never seen his face switch so quickly. One moment he looked too stunned to speak and the next he was looking at me like some bug he wanted to squash.

But rather than react sadly to hearing his tone, my body seemed to melt. My ears had also missed the deep timbre of his voice. Even if it had some venom in it.

“You were just gonna come back to town and not even call?” Namjoon demanded. His words began to make snap me out of my hypnotism. “You’ve ignored all my messages, so it shouldn’t surprise me you want to physically avoid me.”

My brain caught up and my body finally caught up. My mouth opened to speak, but I was silenced before I could even start.

Namjoon continued with his anger. Continued voicing his hurt. “Do you have any idea how shitty that feels? I calledyou, messaged you. I fucking sounded like a goddamn dog begging for forgiveness. And you couldn’t even bother giving me a response? You contacted Jimin right away but not me? Am I unworthy?”

His thinking or saying that he was unworthy of anything ripped something inside. I finally spoke. “I wanted to wait until my quarantine was over. I’m stuck here for 10 days. If I were to have called you, I would have immediately wanted to see you—and I can’t. There’s a mandate.”

He shakes his head. His eyes are looking at me, but he doesn’t see me. It’s like he’s looking at a stranger who’s feeding him lies.

“Ask my Tia Jia,” I said desperately, needing him to believe me. “My quarantine is up in a few days. After, I was going to call you so we could meet.”

“She’ll lie for you,” he accused.

“Then ask Yoongi. I told him I was going to call you first thing after I got the green light.”

He snickered, the glare in his eyes still there. “Of course, you still communicate with Yoongi. You tell me him more than you tell me.”

He was so full of anger that he wasn’t seeing things clearly. He was putting up walls. It was a defense mechanism, I knew it. I needed to keep my calm, make him see. “No one knows me the way you know me, Namjoon,” I said gently, hoping he recognized this was true.

My calmness wasn’t having the effect I wanted to have on him. He didn’t want me calm. But he wanted me to meet his energy.

“Except those other guys who slid inside you like I did that night. They know you like I know you,” he said without thinking, going for the jugular. Needing me hurt the way he was hurting.

His eyes went wide with horror as soon as the words left his mouth. Instant regret.

But the words couldn’t be sucked back in. They were in the air, shooting straight at me like daggers. And they hurt me exactly the way he intended.

I took in a sharp breath, feeling the blades cut right through my skin and hit my chest.

I turned away, feeling the tears sting my eyes. My body reacted like it always did at being wounded, it recoiled. My feet took some towards Jimin’s room. I couldn’t lose it in front of him.

But he was faster. His body blocked me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. I—I’m a fucking idiot.” His voice was strained. “Maya, I am so sorry. I don’t know why I said it. I was wrong.”

My feet moved back, keeping my body safe from his.

“I am so sorry. I’m a fucking prick.” He went down to his knees, his face twisted in remorse. He got on the ground, bowing down and pleading. “Please.”

Hot tears came streaming down as I spoke. “I wasn’t with you for the sex. No one knows me like you—emotionally. No one makes me feel the way you do. I felt safe around you, but then…when you said that—” A sob came out as I remembered.

Walking down the halls barefoot with only my skirt and top.

Tears had smeared off my makeup. I looked like a goddamn wreck. My shoes and undergarments had been left behind. Security both gawked at me and looked away in shame.

Humiliation of a slut.

“I’m sorry; I’m sorry,” he repeated, his head bowing as low as it could.

I took breaths to get ahold of myself. “This is why it’s difficult to let someone in. Because when I do, they have ammunition to use against me. They know what to say, what information to use to belittle me.” It felt so foreign to be this honest with him; it was uncomfortable. But I forced myself to feel the discomfort. “No one’s ever known me the way you have. Every time I’m with you, you reveal some knowledge you have of me that no one has ever noticed about it. It makes me feel so naked. I hated it.”

His head remained on the ground, his body slightly shaking from his own sobs.

Unlike seeing my mother in a state of disarray, I’m fully moved by seeing Namjoon like this. Seeing his regret made me want to immediately give in and forgive him.

But I shouldn’t. I needed to be smart about all of this. It was not ok what he had said to me. Both times.

“Why did you say it?” I demanded.

“I don’t know," he answered with his head still down.

No, I wasn't going to accept that. “You must know. As you said, it’s been a month. You’re telling me you haven’t thought about why you said it all this time?”

He calmed himself and then lifted his head, his eyes meeting mine. “It was out of anger.”

“You wanted to hurt me?”

“Yes.” He looked at me with pain in his eyes. “When I said it that night, it was because I thought I meant nothing to you. It made me angry and I wanted to hurt you. I remember what your exes used to say to you and it slipped. This time, the same thing happened. I felt you cared more for Yoongi and Jimin—feels like I’m not high on your list.”

To think he would stoop so low and try to damage me—on purpose—the same way my exes had ripped something in me. I never would have thought Namjoon to be someone so…normal. Such a human quality to be imperfect.

“I need to know," I forced myself to say. I didn't want to continue this talk. I was feeling so much, but I knew I had to continue. "You have to be honest. Do you have a problem with my sexual past?”

He shook his head, his face serious and steady. “No. You have a past and I would be foolish and selfish to not want you to have one. What I’ve always cared about is how you treat and see me. That's where all the anger came from, I swear.”

I understood. He had been an ass for saying it—twice—but anger was something I could easily understand.

He hung his head again and apologized once more. He was clearly remorseful.

However, I needed to set boundaries. I needed to stand up for myself. “When I open up to you, I expect you not to throw it back at me. It will only make me pull away from you.”

He sat back up and nodded. His face was flushed, tears still coming down. He apologized again.

“I appreciate the apology,” I said genuinely. I turned towards the couch. “Let’s sit down. You’re gonna hurt your knees.” I didn’t wait for his response and went towards the couch.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him get up and walk toward the empty chair. I wasn’t sure if it was because of his presence or due to feeling a sudden chill, but I shivered. Either reason was valid for my body reacting that way. I looked around for the hoodie I had been using in quarantine. I found it on the chair that Namjoon was starting to descend on. Before I could ask if he could hand it over, I noticed something about it.

It was his.

Of course, I knew it was his hoodie I had been wearing. He had left it in LA and I had used it several times since our breakup. However, wearing it in front of him wasn't appropriate.

I tried not to disguise the fact that I was looking for something, pretending it was the blanket on the couch I had been looking for. However, it was no use. He had noticed. His eyes went to the hoodie behind him and a slightly embarrassed look spread across his face.

However, even though he looked awkward, he still reached for it. “You can—”

Grabbing the blanket, I made sure to be extra noise in wrapping it around me, draining out his words. Thankfully, he was quick to catch onto what I was doing and shut up.

As I turned to him, I noticed we were a little too close. And even though my body wanted to get closer to him than I already was, my brain reminded me of the mandate. I was already breaking so many laws with Namjoon being here, I at least wanted to make sure we followed the six feet rule.

After a few moments of silence, Namjoon opened his mouth, ready to start the talk but I cut him off. “Let me start.”

He nodded and kept silent.

Meeting his eyes, I said some words I wanted to say that night. “I need to apologize as well.”

His eyes stayed on me and said nothing.

I took a breath and started what I had set out to do after walking out of Sihyuk’s house about a week ago. “You told me multiple times what you wanted from the relationship—you were very clear. You wanted transparency and I didn’t give you that. I was wrong for how I behaved. For keeping our relationship a secret from my family. I recognize I was dismissive of your emotions. I am very sorry for that.”

He nodded, accepting my apology, but he needed more words from me. “Why did you want to keep me a secret from them? It felt like I was this dirty little secret. I’ll be honest, these last few weeks, the thought that you might have someone on the side came to mind.”

I shook my head, appalled. “I never—”

“I know,” he cut me off. “You would never do something like that. It was a thought that came to mind several times. I want to be fully honest about it. My head went into some pretty dark places these last few weeks. My opinion of you wasn’t very good.”

Guilt stabbed at my chest. I knew he was being with these words. “I’m sorry.”

“Can I know why you refused to tell your family?” He did his best not to sound hurt.

But I knew Namjoon well enough to hear it. “I genuinely thought that not telling my brothers had been an oversight, but after talking to Dr. Rob, I see things differently now.”

He looked a bit shocked. “You’re seeing your therapist again?”

I nodded. “After that night, I kind of had a breakdown. Similar to years ago when I was in the middle of an anxiety attack. After a few days, I knew I needed help. Dr. Rob has been helping me figure some things out—find out why I’ve had this wall up with you.” Using the blanket as a guard, I tugged it tighter around my body as I felt my anxiety start spiking. “I learned that me keeping you at a distance stems from childhood trauma.”

I went on to explain what I had discovered with Dr. Rob. I went into a little more detail about what I witnessed as a kid with my parents. Made the connection that the toxic relationship I grew up watching damaged my trust in a partner. Boyfriends, to me, were a tainted category.

“I didn’t tell my parents about us at first because I don’t have a close relationship with them. I might talk to them on a weekly basis, but it’s always short and I never share anything meaningful. Plus, I’m sure my mother’s ability to taint anything I care about had something to do with it. Not telling her kept you safe for me. I can easily see her make a comment about how wrong I am for you. She did it several times with Jerry. I didn’t want her doing that with you.”

Namjoon’s face was calm, but his eyes were very loud about how he felt about hearing this.

“And I think there are a few reasons why I didn’t tell my brothers. One of them was because it would make us more real. Which increased the possibility of you leaving. And that scared me.” The abandonment issues I didn’t know I had started to resurface. Now that I could identify the feeling, I took notice of it quickly. “The only guys who stuck around were the bad ones.”

“Jerry was willing to stick around,” he pointed out immediately. “And he was great.”

“But he didn’t really know me. I kept a lot of things from him. And the things I did tell him, he dismissed,” I countered back.

“But I do and I want to be with you,” he said without hesitation.

My heart ached for multiple reasons. “Which makes you more dangerous. It’s a double-edged sword.”

“I know I fucked up. And I am more than willing to ask for forgiveness every day—”

I cut him off. “No. I know you regret it and know you mean your apology. I forgive you. I don’t want it to become something that hangs over us. I’m still hurt by it, but it won’t last.”

He gave a slight nod. After a quiet moment, he spoke up. “I really don’t want to push you away. But I want to be let in. And I want to know that you’ll allow me in.”

I held onto his eyes, noticing how pleading they looked. I had to be honest. I couldn’t sugarcoat this. “It’s gonna be tough for me. Letting someone in is not easy. The last people I let in and depended on ended up fucking me up. I put a wall up for survival and it’s been hard bringing it down. I’ve always been aware of the wall’s presence and I’ve never minded it. But with you, I mind. I don’t want to keep you out. Even if my fight or flight instincts are screaming at me.”

He looked away, seeming to think about something.

It was a look I had seen far too often, especially more toward the end of our relationship. He was holding back. And like always, I wanted to know what was on his mind. “What? Tell me.” I braced myself for whatever he was about to say.

He didn’t meet my eyes but answered my question. “When we fought that one night—not the very last one, but the one when you almost left in the middle of the night…?”

“Yeah…?”

“You were reliving something….”

I thought back, trying to recall that night.

“Your anxiety kicked in…”

I remembered. “Mm-hmmm.”

“What was it?” There was a slight look of reluctance like he was afraid to ask. Afraid of my reaction. Afraid I might not answer.

I had told him I wanted to let him in, now I had to prove it. “A fight between my parents.”

His facial features relaxed a bit. “What was it about what I did that triggered the memory?”

The image of his fiery brown eyes crossed my mind. Eyes that were always so warm when I looked into them had been icy that night. “Your anger. You’ve gotten mad at me before, but that look…that was real anger towards me.” My eyes stayed on his as I told him what I discovered with Dr. Rob. “I know you’re nothing like my parents. But that night emotions were already escalating. My feelings for you were getting more intense. Internally, I was fighting with my defenses. I wanted to let you in and I also wanted to keep you away. Sadly, the wall won that night. The image of my parents fighting pushed me to keep it up. Not to mention that I’ve had prior relationships that around the four-month period, their demeanor changed. The thought did cross my mind that you were going to turn into one of them.”

He thought for a long moment, considering my words. He looked down at his feet, which were joined. He moved his feet a bit, thinking.

“What?” I asked, knowing he was hesitating in asking something serious.

He didn’t meet my eyes but did speak up. “I thought you might have been reliving something else that night.”

“Like what?” I asked.

“Something you haven’t been able to tell me. Something you’re keeping secret.” The cocoa browns that pulled so many feelings out of me came up. “There’s something I want to know. I’ve been holding back in asking because I’ve never wanted to push you to tell me anything you’re not ready to. But it’s gotten to the point where I keep imagining the absolute worst.” A stream of tears began to come down as he braved himself. “What happened to you that caused the anxiety attack years ago?”

Another difficult hurdle had come. Tears were also coming out of me and I took a few breaths to get myself under control. “I want to share everything with you, Namjoon. But some things are difficult to talk about. Some things that,” flashes of the scariest moments of my life came to the forefront, threatening to suck me in. The bulwark I had built since childhood stood tall and strong, though, keeping the old memories at a distance. That fucking wall was my protector just as much as it was my poison. “I don’t want to ever relive,” I finished as I caught on to my words again. “There are some things I suppressed and can’t remember. There are other memories I wish I could forget.”

He cut me off, a look full of concern as he witnessed my state. “I don’t want you to relive something that is going to do more damage. I don’t want you to have to dig in too deep that you get lost.” The tears coming down from him were probably thicker than mine. “I just wanted to help you. It seemed like there was something you were going through and I wanted to comfort you. Especially since you weren’t seeing your therapist anymore.”

I nodded, agreeing with him wholeheartedly. “I shouldn’t have stopped therapy. I should have continued it. I thought I had a handle on things, but I didn’t.” I took a breath and finally said the words I had practiced so much with Dr. Rob. “I wasn’t prepared before in letting a significant other in. But I want to. I want to let you in. And I promise that I am working on it and will continue to work on it. I will tell you in more detail about what happened, but I won’t tell you everything this time.”

He waited patiently. “Whatever you want to tell me. And whatever you don’t or can’t, that’s ok with me, too. As long as you’re getting help is what matters.”

******Tugging the blanket around me, I finally told him. “Around the time my contract was about to expire, I was to have a meeting with some executives and Ky was supposed to be there. However, things happened and Ky couldn’t be there and neither could some of the executives. Only one of them met with me. The meeting started ok, but somehow it turned into a nightmare. The executive made comments that hinted at me doing him sexual favors in exchange for a better contract. It was surreal at first; I thought it was some joke. But then he walked over to me. He got too close. I froze. I felt my shirt come undone.”*******

I took the chance of stealing a look at Namjoon, wondering how he was taking this.

His face was expressionless. He kept his eyes on me with no hint of anger or pain. I let out a breath, relieved. It was something I feared a little. Namjoon had always been one to control his emotions, always relying on his head. But there was always the possibility of his emotions getting the best of him. I knew if he did lose control, I would focus on him rather than myself.

I was about to continue but then I noticed his fists. They were clenched. His arms tightened. He was angry, I could feel it now.

I instantly began to worry about him.

“What then, babe?” Namjoon said, pulling my focus away. “Don’t focus on me. Go on.” He had caught my stare.

I took a breath and continued to speak about my assault. I didn’t give him too many details, still not feeling ready to tell him everything. He sat still and listened. I told him about my talk with my mother and when I got a bit emotional, he made a move to move toward me.

With a shake of the head, I pleaded him to stay where he was. “If you hug me, I’ll come apart. And I want to get through this.”

He respected this and stayed in his seat. However, he did lean forward, looking ready to rush to my side as soon as I gave him the go-ahead.

A good while later, I was certain I had shared as much as I could about my trauma. I shed many tears, but I didn’t feel as bad as I thought I would.

Looking out the window, I could only imagine what time it was. It was pitch black. This had taken a lot longer than I thought.

“Thank you for sharing that with me. I bet it wasn’t easy,” he said genuinely, a look of complete care on his face.

“Thank you for listening,” I responded.

“I like listening to you.” His words moved something in me.

Having just shared so much with him, I felt a shift between us. I felt a shift in myself. The fact that he had sat there for hours listening to me and respecting my boundaries moved something in me. Suddenly, I had the urge to tell him everything; tell him exactly what I thought of him but had been too afraid to share in the past.

“There's more I need to tell you," I said, building up even more courage.

I was certain he could tell I was getting nervous. He offered me one of my favorite smiles. "I'm all ears."

I took a deep breath and began to let my heart pour out. "You are, without a doubt, the best human I know. You’re kind, gentle, resilient, positive, and empathetic. You deserve the goddamn world.” Talking about my admiration for him was making me quite emotional. So emotional that I started to cry. What I felt for Namjoon was not something that I had ever allowed myself to feel. Dr. Rob said that it would take some time to talk openly about this positive emotion without my body physically responding this way.

I was quick to notice how Namjoon shook his head, disagreeing with my view of him.

But I needed him to know how I saw him. “Despite the negativity thrown at you, you keep your composure. You stay collected when it matters most. It’s one of the many reasons why I fell for you.” Looking into his beautiful features, I continued my praises. “And there are so many qualities that made me fall for you—many physical. Like your pout. The pout you make when you mutter to yourself. And how you look when you come out of the shower in all your gloriousperfection.” He blushed wildly at this. But I wasn’t done. “When you chow down your third bowl of noodles, your Adam’s apple bobs in this very sexy way. And my favorite thing about you is how you make me feel happy.” A burst of crazed laughter came out of me, thinking of all the little moments with Namjoon. The last few weeks we had been together, this was one of the emotions I had felt and tried to block: happiness. It was so foreign to me, so I had naturally recoiled from it. However, in the month away from him, I came to find that not feeling happiness was a feeling I did not want.

He took a breath, wiped some tears, and looked directly at me. He opened his mouth, ready to say something.

But I wasn’t done. There was one last thing I needed to tell him. The most important thing I knew I would ever say. “I love you, Kim Namjoon.”

It felt like a breath of fresh air saying it. While it was difficult getting to this point, letting out the words felt good. Felt so right.

My eyes did not sway from his cocoa browns. His body relaxed—he looked relieved.

I was bathing in the happiness of finally saying the words to him but then noticed him getting to his feet. I acted instinctively and got up, wanting to get close to him. However, I remembered I was under quarantine. If I had the virus, he might get sick again. It would mess up his entire schedule. I backed away as he made a reach for him. “Six feet,” I reminded him.

He followed me, a determined look in his eyes. “Fuck the six feet.” He reached out, catching my upper arm and keeping me in place.

“Namjoon—” The air got caught in my lungs as his touch sent thrills throughout my skin. Every cell sang in joy. However, my brain demanded I take back control. I tried to pull away.

His bold and gentle hands came to my face, keeping me. His mystic eyes held my gaze.

My brain and body became mush at that point, giving up the battle. I sighed into his touch.

“Say it again,” his honeyed voice said above a whisper.

I don’t think I could ever deny him anything. “I love you, Kim Namjoon.” My heart fluttered at hearing myself say it.

I was entrusting him with my heart. And as I felt him around me, I was positive he would protect it and me at all costs.

He let out a kind of laugh I had never heard him make. It was high and kind of panty. He sounded a bit delirious. I saw the smile I had been missing for over a month. His eyes squinted as his smile widened. His nose scrunched up a bit, changing the freckled constellations on his beautiful canvas. How had I lasted so long without seeing this expression every day?

“I really missed these,” I said, my fingers reaching up and tracing the cluster of marks around his eyes and nose.

His hands moved down to my middle and tightened around me. His face came down to my neck, his nose hitting the spot between my ear and neck. He took a deep inhale. “I missed you.”

I turned my head towards his own neck, wanting to smell him back. My nose grazed his skin and I breathed in his woodsy scent.

We stayed like that for a long time, until he finally pulled up. His arms stayed around me. “I found out how I felt about you while I was with my last girlfriend,” he said, almost out of nowhere.

My state of happiness made my mind not work fast enough. “Huh?”

He went out to further explain. “I broke up with my ex a year ago because I was falling for you. By the time we were in the backhouse in the soop, I was a goner. I knew that week.” His eyes stayed on me, one of his palms back to stroking my face. “I love you, Mayahuel.”

I never thought my heart would feel ready to combust. Every fiber of my body tingled as small amounts of electricity danced inside my cells. Tears of happiness erupted once again.

More happy pecks were shared.

It started light, but I quickly felt the heat start kicking in. Not wanting Jimin’s house to be the next place we consummated our new relationship, I decided to kid around with him. “Just don’t forget I’m the one who said it first.”

He let out a light laugh. “You might have said it first, but I definitely felt it first. I let you say it first, know that,” he said teasingly, biting my lower lip.

I gave him a light smack. “You really don’t want to turn this into a competition,” I warned. “I probably fell in love with you years ago, I just was suppressing it.”

“You said it was only a crush!”

I shrugged my shoulders. “That’s not the story I’ll be telling everyone,” I said, giving him a playful smile.

“You better play nice or I won’t feed you tomorrow,” he warned. “I know you’re running out of food. I’ll let you starve,” he joked with a flirtatious smile.

Giving him another smack, I let out a pout. “Be nice to me. All I’ve had today has been ramen which was probably five years old. I found it way in the back of some dirty cupboard.”

With that, Namjoon immediately pulled out his phone and ordered multiple dishes from one of my favorite places. He went on to order me groceries that would probably last me a week. He ignored the dozen times I told him he was going overboard.

I openly rolled my eyes at him.

He didn’t answer me; his eyes looking at my arms. We were both now on the couch, waiting on the food. His body and the blanket were providing a nice warmth, but it wasn’t enough for my body. “How are you still cold?” He reached over to grab the hoodie on the chair.

However, I stopped him. “Can I have the one you have on instead?”

“Why?” he asked with a frown, but I didn’t miss how he started to take off his hoodie.

“The other one has lost your smell,” I said honestly. “Plus, this one is already warm.”

He let out a chuckle, the hoodie now off him. He handed it to me gently.

As I put it on, I took in his body. I hadn’t noticed before because Namjoon tended to wear baggy clothes. He rarely put on clothes that rightly fit his frame. But now, without the sweater, I saw how much weight he had lost.

“Namjoon,” I said, concerned.

“What?” he asked, confused by my reaction.

“You look…different.” I wanted to say scrawny, but that wasn’t a nice word to use.

He waved his hand, dismissing it. “It’s not just because of what happened. I was traveling, remember? No time for the gym. Then I ended up being stuck indoors for close to three weeks. I got an appointment to meet with my trainer in a few days.”

I gave a nod, but still couldn’t help but feel guilty for my part in his state.

Namjoon was quick to catch on to my emotions. “Hey,” he said, tipping my chin up to meet his gaze. “No guilt, ok? It was a bad time, but we’re not going back there. We’re looking ahead.”

The next nod I gave was a little more confident.

Then, a chime came on, signaling our delivery had arrived. After retrieving the bags of food, we sat on the floor to eat. I probably shouldn’t be eating this late, but I was starving.

“What are your plans after coming out of quarantine? Can your apartment be ready by the time Jimin gets back?” Namjoon asked as he fed me some of his noodles.

I took them, hungrily. “I’m hoping so. I really hate apartment shopping.”

“Stay with me until it’s ready,” Namjoon immediately offered.

“Are we ready for that?” I asked him honestly.

He thought for a moment. “I want to be, but maybe we aren’t?”

“If you have to ask, then we aren’t. I don’t want to take a step we’re unsure of.”

He nodded and took a big bite from his noodles.

“Where do you want from us?” I asked. “I know you’ve always wanted to share your thoughts but held back. I don’t want to keep you from voicing what you want to say.”

He thought for a moment. “I want a nice dinner with you and my parents. I want to properly introduce you. I’d like to see if it’s at all possible to meet with your aunt Jia and Uncle John, formally. You consider them more like your parents.”

I smiled, thinking his wants were easy to meet. “My aunt and uncle will be here in a few weeks, so that’s easy to make happen.”

He frowned. “They’re coming? What for? Just for a visit?”

“Well, Sihyuk actually invited them. They’ll be visiting for about two weeks.”

“Why does Sihyuk want to meet with them?”

I then told him.

*********

~NAMJOON~

Weeks later….

There was only reason Namjoon had gone to HYBE on his day off was for moral support. Today was the day. And he was positive Maya’s anxiety would be spiking. He had seen her over his place earlier and her nerves were already jittery.

The elevator doors opened to his designated floor. He walked out and headed to the lobby, seeing one man and two women speaking to each other. The man and the older woman were sitting on the couch as the younger woman paced in front of them.

Yeah, her anxiety was spiking, Namjoon thought as he quickened his pace.

They were in such heavy discussion; he was positive they hadn’t heard him.

The couple was the first to notice him. He gave them a smile and polite bow.

Maya’s aunt and uncle got to their feet and greeted Namjoon back.

From the corner of his eye, he noticed Maya had stopped pacing and making her way to him. “What are you doing here?” she asked him. She was trying to hide the feeling of relief.

If her aunt and uncle hadn’t been present, he would have wrapped her in his arms to calm her. However, he had been raised to be a proper, Korean man and kept a proper distance. He got as close as he felt was respectful. “I told you I would meet you here,” he reminded her.

“Yeah, but I thought you meant it would be after the meeting.” He noticed how her legs leaned towards him, but she also kept her distance. She knew him well to know what he was comfortable with when it came to PDA. They had met with her aunt and uncle a few times for her to know.

“I wanted to be here to escort you if you wanted. And to answer any last-minute questions.”

“So, it really is going to be just the three of us and him? No other executives? No lawyers?” Asked Jia, still looking like she didn’t believe what had been said to her several times.

Namjoon smiled and nodded. “Sihyuknim cares and respects his artists. Having a meeting with the artist and their parents is something very important to him. He wants the parents to know he’s taking good care of their child. That he is willing to treat the artist like extended family. He did the same with us. It was just us, our parents—no lawyers—and we signed the contracts. It’s the reason why Big Hit is so small. He wants it to be a family business.”

John’s chest puffed a bit like he loved the idea that he was considered to be Maya’s parent. Jia’s smile spread wide, clearly feeling the same. There were even some tears in her eyes.

Jia seemed to shake herself out of it. “Namjoonah, is there a particular wine your parents really like? Mayita says they like wine but is unsure which is their favorite,” Jia said.

“I’ll message you an image of it,” Namjoon promised.

Maya’s aunt and uncle were going to meet Namjoon’s parents tonight. It had been Namjoon’s mother who had invited Maya’s family over.

Maya had been over for dinner at his parents' every weekend. Namjoon also had a feeling Eomuni would be inviting them to the house for Seollol.

“We would appreciate that, thank you,” responded Jia.

“How have you guys been sleeping?” Namjoon asked, curious. He remembered John mentioning the other day how the time difference was affecting his sleep.

“Better last night,” John said.

They were staying in Maya’s new apartment. Her old apartment was having too many issues with the renovations and wasn’t going to be ready for the initial date they had given Maya. The landlord let Maya out of her lease early, so she was able to look for another apartment.

While it had caused a lot of stress for Maya for a couple of weeks, something good came out of it. She had found an apartment in Namjoon’s community, so she was now a lot closer. They wouldn’t need to use so many drivers now since they were only walking distance from one another.

But even though they saw each other every day, they didn’t sleep in each other’s place. This time, Namjoon wanted to make sure their emotions were stable before they took that next step. Like before, Maya assured Namjoon that once he was ready then she would be, too. And it’s not like he didn’t want to sleep with her, because goddammit he did.

However, he was really enjoying the stage they were in. During the few weeks they had gotten back together, Maya had done such a turn-around. She was emotionally open and communicated very well with Namjoon. Gone were the days that she kept things to herself. The only time she did this was when she wasn’t sure what she was going through. And she told Namjoon so. When she got confused about something, rather than closing up, she let Namjoon know she needed time to decipher what she was feeling or thinking. This change in her made Namjoon fall deeper in love with her. He hadn’t thought it was possible, but it was the truth.

And the more he fell in love with her, the more he was drawn to her physically. It was getting harder to keep his hands off her. He was ready to make that next step with her. And he had a feeling it might be tonight. There were just a few things he needed to take care of.

“Should we start heading up?” asked John as he looked down at his watch.

We all turned to Maya.

She nodded, looking at little nervous.

Jia reached over and squeezed her arm before taking her husband’s hand. “Let’s go.”

John made a motion for Maya to lead the way.

As Maya walked, she took hold of Namjoon’s arm.

Together, they all walked towards the elevator. Plenty of eyes turned towards the four of them, their gaze lingering on Maya’s arm linked through Namjoon’s. He was sure Maya noticed the stares as well.

She didn’t seem bothered by them, though. She kept her head high in confidence.

Namjoon felt his heart swell and witnessed Maya feeling indifferent to the staff learning about her possibly romantic relationship with Bagntan’s leader, RM.

Yeah, he was definitely taking her to bed tonight.

**************

MASTERLIST

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30 Sequel (Book II)

***********************

AN: This concludes the story I planned for Maya and Namjoon! Thank you everyone for coming along on this journey! I adored writing these two.

However, I do have some news—good or bad, I don't know. This story will be continuing. I haven’t been able to get rid of these two from my head. Mostly it’s because RM smutty songs keep inspiring me. The first chapter of their new story is up and linked here.

I have the story (mostly) mapped out. It won’t be a story as long as this one ( I hope). It will work mostly as a journey of the two learning how to navigate through a mature, adult relationship. I intend to have an equal amount of fluff and smut in every chapter. It will work more like chapters of drabbles than one, big story.

Similarly to ITMOTN, though, I’ll want a big chunk of the story written before I start posting.

[first-and-last-neocount]

Whumptober Teaser Post

So much for not going for completion. X'D

Here's the general game plan - I've come up with a prompt choice/general plot for each day, and I'm going to start writing them immediately. Whether or not I actually try for completion during the month of October is going to depend on how much I can get written during September - if I have 21 or more done by October 1st, I'll try to finish them all, but I'm not going to let myself try to write more than 10 fics during the actual month of posting to prevent myself from stressing right into burnout again. I'll do periodic updates during September on how many I have written so far to give a general picture of whether completion is likely or not.

I'm not doing purely Coldfire this time! As much as I love it, I think that trying to work on that many fills for only one fandom at a time might have been part of my problem last year, so I'm going to shake it up this year. (Fully half of them are still Coldfire but I can only vary so much from my essential nature, lol.) Below is a photo of my pretty multicolored notes, and under the cut is a transcription/elaboration of the info; the day, the fandom, and the ship/extremely vague premise of each planned fill! (Keeping which prompt I picked from each day a secret for now :P)

Actually readable version:

Day 1 - Coldfire Trilogy - It Walks Among Us, It Walks Within installment.

Day 2 - DragonLance - Astinus/Raistlin canon divergence fic set during the Legends trilogy.

Day 3 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 4 - DragonLance - Astinus/Raistlin fic chapter.

Day 5 - Melanie Rawn's Dragon Prince trilogy - Andry/Pol canon divergence fic set during The Star Scroll.

Day 6 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 7 - Resident Evil - Weskennedy RE4 canon divergence fic.

Day 8 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 9 - Bloodborne - Laurence/Ludwig, sequel to Erit Praemium Sanguine Sanctum.

Day 10 - Shannara - Garet Jax/Jair fic set during the Dark Wraith of Shannara graphic novel.

Day 11 - Resident Evil - Weskennedy RE4 fic chapter.

Day 12 - Grimm - Sean/Nick canon divergence set during the episode Three Coins in a Fuschbau.

Day 13 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 14 - Grimm - Sean/Nick canon divergence chapter.

Day 15 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 16 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 17 - Resident Evil - Weskennedy RE4 fic chapter.

Day 18 - Resident Evil - Weskennedy RE4 fic chapter.

Day 19 - DragonLance - Astinus/Raistlin fic chapter.

Day 20 - Coldfire Trilogy - It Walks Among Us, It Walks Within installment.

Day 21 - Coldfire Trilogy - It Walks Among Us, It Walks Within installment.

Day 22 - Star Wars - Rexakin canon divergence set during the Clone Wars.

Day 23 - Coldfire Trilogy - It Walks Among Us, It Walks Within installment.

Day 24 - Star Wars - Rexakin canon divergence chapter.

Day 25 - Star Wars - Rexakin canon divergence chapter.

Day 26 - Star Wars - Rexakin canon divergence chapter.

Day 27 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 28 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 29 - Coldfire Trilogy - It Walks Among Us, It Walks Within installment.

Day 30 - Coldfire Trilogy - You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me chapter.

Day 31 - Coldfire Trilogy - 'Cause I Loved You For Too Long final chapter.

...

As you guys can probably tell, I've been kind of holding back on You'll Tell to Me What'll Happen to Me since I started suspecting I might want to do Whumptober, because that fic is nothing but whump (in TV Tropes language I think it would qualify as a Trauma Conga Line). I'm also dipping my toes into some fandoms I really enjoy but haven't written for yet, so we'll see how that goes, lol.

I'm going to bite the bullet this year and post these things properly; everything will be getting uploaded to AO3 and then linked to Tumblr instead of posting directly here, because these will be going up out of order with each other like always and it's so much less confusing for everyone if they're at least properly structured in a series on AO3. Plus, this go round, I should have the time to do final edits/AO3 uploads more easily without the horrific crunch of still trying to write them all at the last minute!

I'll admit I'm really curious to see if any of my follower have ever read Melanie Rawn's books, I read them around the same time I read Black Sun Rising, and although they didn't shape my personality quite as fundamentally as Coldfire did they're still very dear to me. Shannara as well, given that I started reading that series when I was nine, and a lot of my own writing voice (and certainly my love of imagery) was inspired by Terry Brooks.

Now, into the grand adventure of actually writing all of these! XD

[hellurdur]

206 QUESTIONS

Pick a question and I'll answer

Then I'll pick and you'll answer

#till we're tired#

Anyone that fails to answer, will subscribe the other person's phone.

1:Do u still love your ex?��❤

2:Will u marry me?😕

3:Are u in love?😶

4:Do u like me?😏

5:Can we date?👀

6:Are u single?😴

7:Can I be your bestie?😇

8:Can I be your gf/bf?😉

9: Let's be frnds wif benefits?🔥

10:Send me your nude?😋

11:What ll u do if we where locked in a room for 2 hrs?😎

12:Let's be fuck buddies?😜

13: Seduce me when we meet?😒

14:something u love about me?😍

15:Write a paragraph about me?💓

16:Who is your favourite person to chat with?😌

17:Who do u hate?🤨

18:Date me or pass?🤷🏼‍♂🤷🏼‍♀

19:Send me a screen shot of the chat with your crush😈

20:Confess to me something deep😠

21:Put a pic of me on your status an take it off after 2 minutes🙃

22:kiss for an hour?😋

24: What's your nickname?

25:How would u describe me atleast 6 lines😗

26:Put me as your status saying my boo🦋

27:Write my name on your status with a heart❤

28:Propose to me💍

29:Send me your sexy pic🔥

30:Send me your sexiest pic💥

31:Write my name on your status saying u love me🙊

32:Would u choose food or me🤤

33:Tell your bestie u like me😀

34:The best thing we did together🤭

35:Tell me your deepest secret🤪

36:Whose your boy bestie ?😁

37:Whose your girl bestie?😄

38:Smash or pass?👌

39:Ever lied to your crush?✌

40:Ever cried for love?😭

41:Ever dreamt about me?😱

42:Tell me something to make me blush😊

43:Post on your status u love me till the moon and back😂

44:Do u consider me a gud friend?👥

45:Can I be your bestie?👫

46:Post a pic of me on your status saying my bestie TLT🤷‍♀

47:Tell me if u see me as a angel or a devil?🧚‍♀👿

48:Tell me something that makes me happy and sad at the same time🧐

49:Hug me next time u see me👩🧑

50:Tell me a secret about u?😨

51:Tell the person u hate u love them🤣

52:Tell the person u love u hate them😃

53:Post on your status in pain😢

54:Wright my name and your name on your status for 1 day🙈

55:Be my slave for 2 days🤩

56:send me your boob pic you can't say no tho

56²: pic in panty only😋

57:Tell me something u have never told anyone😛

58:Rate me out of 10⭐

59:Where do u see our friendship in a months time💫

60:Whats on your mind?🤔

61:Send me a 100 hearts an say u love me 💖

62:What atrackts u to me the most?❣

63:Let's have sex on the first date 👙

64:Put my pic and write we had a great night 😍

65:Tell the person who broke your Virginia 😁

66:let's fuck for a night🤪

67:Tell someone u love them🤤

68:Send me a v.n saying BABY I LOVE U💞

69:Send me a song witch reminds u of me💝

70:Tell someone u crying for me💟

71:Tell someone #with your name for no reason😂

72:Hug me tight next time u see me🙈😍

73:Send me your naughtiest pic☠

74:will we be together in the future?💙

75:What would u prefer singing or dancing with me?🗣

76:Keep your breath in for 1hour😶

77:Send me 3 photos of u that u think is cute✨🌹

78:Tell me anything over a v.n🌈

79:Kiss me on the chick next time u see me☺🙈

80: Send me $2 ecocash💰

81:What would u want our relation to be?🤔

82:Give me 10 kisses😙

83:What would u do if I asked u out?🙈

84:Bribe someone😆

85:Am I naughty?😜

86:Would u take me with u to a party?🎉

87:Would u like to sing with me?🎤

88:Buy me a chocolate🍫

89:Tell someone there hot🔥

90:Eat a ladybug🐞

91:Tell someone they look like an alien 👽

92:Send me a cute message😱😳

93:Send me a new contact😒

94:Ask someone do they love u?😘

95:Are u a lazy person?

96:Cry for 2 hours😭

97:Send me one of your beautiful pics😱98:Send me one of 9 your most embarrassing pics

99. Thoughts on me?

100. Would you ever date me?

101. Birthday

102. Worst mistake

103. Ur greatest fear

104. Crush

105. Best colour

106. Do u or have u smoked?

107. Do u drink alcohol?

108. Do u go for nyt parties?

109. Last time u cried and wat caused it

110. Ur dreams

111. Have u or do u masturbate?

112. Happiest moment

113. Best memory

114. Last kiss and wit who

115. Do you watch porn?

116. Your best body part

117. Ever been fucked hard nd u cried?

118. Complete d**k

119. Complete p***y

120. Ur most enjoyable sex,tel me abt it in details

121. Full name

122. If u have d chance wil u date me?

123. Will u kiss me?

124. Kiss or hug

125. Favorite song

126. Favorite movie

127. Ever kissed a same gender person?

128. Do u love bj?

129. Send me ur number

130. Ever maked out?

131. Wanna explore me?

132. Wanna kiss me?

133. Wanna fuck me?

134. Wanna date me?

135. Ever been abused?

136. Best hubby

137. Tel me 3 deepest secrets

138. Send me ur nude pics or porn videos

139. Favorite body part of ur opposite gender

140. Big dicks or normal dicks

141. Big pussy or normal pussy

142. Promise to kiss me wen we meet

143. Tell me how u really feel about me

144. Tell me a story

145. Do u wear bra?

146. Do u always wear pant?

147. Promise to watch porn wit me or gv me a Bj

148. Will u let me finger u or stroke ur dick?

149. Wat age did u have ur first sex

150. Wat year did u have ur first sex

151. Player or loyal

152. Single or taken

153. Have you ever been played?

154. Have you ever played someone?

155. Tell me an erotic story

156. Last sex

157. Ever had sex wit a same gender person?

158. Use my pic as ur dp for 1 week

159. Send me ur breast or chest picture

160. Do u sex chat?

161. If u see me naked, wat will u do

162. Shy or bold

163. Ever slept naked?

164. Virgin?

165. Wat turns u on

166. What do you love doing the most

167. Ever begged for sex?

168. D craziest tin u have ever done

169. Best friend

170. Ever had sex?

171. Age

172. Are you naughty?

173. Naughtiest tin u have ever done

174. Ever exchanged nude?

175. Buy me a gift

176. Wil you let me touch you?

177. Do you love me?

178. How do you want d dick or pussy to be.

179. Sex chat with me

180. Have some mistakenly seeing ur dick or pussy?

181. What gets u wet

182. Last time u felt like having sex

183. Favorite clothes

184. Ask me anything

185. Promise to have sex with me

186. Nickname

187. Favorite sex position

188. How long do you want sex to be.

189. Do you love sex?

190. Something u will change about yourself

191. Send me two of your sexiest pics

192. Tell me how you had ur last time sex in details

193. How much do you enjoy sex

194. Tell me things you want from me.

195. Hard fuck or normal

196. Send me 2 pics of your dick

197. Send me 2 pics of your pussy

198. Hairy dick/pussy or shaved

199. Send me your dance videos

200. Will you fuck me?

201. Ever fucked someone you don't love?

202. What do you like in a girl

203. What do you like in a boy

204. Tell me things you want us to do together

205. Send me a sex video of yourself

Ask away, I’m really bored.

[bahamutgames]

AFTERTHOUGHTS - ROUNDUP ROUND 5

July 2023

Here we go again! I did NOT expect to play so much this month but I... yknow... kinda... got back into gaming in a special little way. I gave it up for a bit cause I was using a hand me down laptop that couldn't run games well, and I was having some phobias about data loss. Then I got a new laptop and while I did do a little bit, I mostly starting focusing on finally playing actual PC games and more indie games that were always out of my grasp as a dedicated console gamer.

Anyway I played a SHIT TON of games and hopefully I'll be able to play more and more. I have a gaming laptop, I have a big ass hard drive, and I have NO MONEY! SO LET'S PARTY!!!

Pikmin (October 26, 2001) - Gamecube

Ah, Pikmin. I've actually had a huge soft spot for this series for a long time. I always loved the world and characters. I remember writing an essay on Pikmin 2 in elementary school, and my mom convinced me to start journaling by telling me Olimar kept a journal lol. But you'll probably be shocked to learn that I NEVER beat this game! I've always been really bad at it and would get sad when my Pikmin died so I gave up on it. But with the power of save scumming, I was able to get the confidence needed to clear through it.

For positives this game is GORGEOUS. Even for gamecube trying to look hyper realistic (in the environments at least lol) I'm actually blown away by how good it looks! Playing on Dolphin may have helped but damn this game's graphics have ages AMAZINGLY. The whole game is also just so charming. Everyone's designs are really cute and delightful. From the Grubdogs to the SS Dolphin itself, their designs are lovely and everything is filled with such personality and charm. I love how goofy and squash-and-stretchy the Pikmin are. It's all so adorable even when facing themes on the cruelty of nature lol. Music is also FANTASTIC, gameplay is fun, I love the story and ending (the part with all the onions was SO cute.) I loved figuring out ways to get parts quicker and trickier, like one part is being guarded by 3 Burrowing Snagrets but you only need to kill the farthest to get it. So I had a bunch of Pikmin grab it and carry it out of the arena while I distracted the other two with a smaller army. It was very neat.

But I will say for all that praise this game is fucking ANNOYING! The Pikmin are so determined to die! I'll be doing everything in my power to keep them safe and they just gloriously run into any body of water or explosion they can. It's so frustrating and is a big reason I decided to emulate it despite owning the game physically. This could get especially frustrating when trying to precise things to get certain ship parts and having to deal with Pikmin stupidity combined with annoying hyper aggressive enemies. But despite that, every day since beating it all I can think is "damn I wish I was still playing Pikmin." So you can expect me to try Pikmin 2 very soon!

Sonic the Fighters (June 1996) - Gamecube

Sonic the Hedgehog? Check. Fighting Game? Double Check. Somehow I've gone my whole life and NEVER played this game!! I've had friends talk about how good it was for ages and it's literally two of my favorite things combined. So I'm very happy that I finally gave it a whirl. I played through Arcade on the easiest difficulty as Sonic!

And may I just say, I only played a little bit. So maybe I didn't get the full experience, but the gameplay in this SUCKS. In general I'm not a huge fan of 3D fighting games over 2D ones. But the enemies are so ruthlessly brutal for NO reason and it genuinely made some fights IMPOSSIBLE to get past. Particularly Tails and Metal Sonic. I am not proud of the swears I shouted at this game just trying my hardest to clear the Arcade mode. And it's endlessly frustrating to me that this game seems to get so much more love and be more popular than Sonic Battle which is LEAGUES better! WHY ARE SO MANY OF SONIC'S SMASH BROS. MOVES FROM THIS AND NOT BATTLE!?

But, I will say. I totally get why people like it. Pretty much everything outside of the combat totally fucking rules. The character models are cute, charming, and full of personality. The menus are nice, the music is GREAT. The plot is cute and works. The level backgrounds are AMAZING, seriously they look WONDERFUL! And I particularly really loved the final boss. Where the Death Egg is exploding and Eggman comes out with a self destruct timer, and then that timer turns into the match timer. SUPER cool touch. This game is really cool in spite of being kinda annoying to play.

Anyway, new Sonic 2D Fighter made by Arc System Works next please!!

Soul Calibur 2 (July 5th, 2002) - Gamecube

Oh boy, another 3D Fighting Game. Here we go. Soul Calibur is a series I've only played once before with SC6. And while the whole aesthetic and concept of this series absolutely RULES, it just doesn't really click with me. I love the weapons, Nightmare is SUCH a bad ass and so is the Soul Edge, I love the over the top narrator who says so much, the edgy fantasy aesthetic rules, and I love the weird guest characters. But it just never fully clicked sadly. BUT, I've heard LOTS of people say it's one of the best fighting games ever so I figured I'm overdue to check it out.

Just like SC6, this game looks great and has great character designs. I'm particularly a big sucker for these gorgeous Gamecube graphics. Lizardman was my main even though I played the arcade as Nightmare (since you can't do arcade as Lizardman which fucking blows.) But yeah I'm just not super into the gameplay. Neat game though. This and Tekken are both neat games I may sit down and try to play all of some day.

Super Monkey Ball (June 23, 2001) - Gamecube

You may be shocked to learn that I've barely touched this series in the past. I've played a Monkey Ball Arcade Machine at a Chuck E. Cheese once... I played the phone version one time... And that's about it! I know it's a really loved series but for whatever reason it just never came into my life before. But I've had a friend tell me I should play it for a while now so I decided, what the heck? Since I'm here I might as well give it a shot.

And yeah it's neat! I totally get why people like it! It's tricky, but honestly a ton of fun. Love the graphics and level aesthetics. Music is nice (I LOVED the final area's music with the rock soundtrack in that edgy colosseum). The characters are all super cute (my favorite Monkey Ball character is that one with pigtails and a raccoon tail but she wasn't in this one sadly.) I love the random Dole cross promotion stuff that was genuinely funny. And I like that you actually control the stage that was neat. My only major issues aside from it being, generally frustrating is that the camera can actually REALLY fuck you over, it tries to kinda hang towards your back. But this can really influence your delicate control over the stage. I had some levels where the camera swinging it around genuinely made it impossible to get over some hills.

Frustrating as it was, I actually remembered that my sister bought a Monkey Ball game on Switch recently, so I can absolutely see myself playing more of this series later.

Guilty Gear X (July 13, 2000) - Playstation 2

Ah, one of the last few Guilty Gear games I haven't played. I'm not sure why, but this one just never seems to get ported anywhere. If I had to guess it's cause it's very similar to XX, but it does have a very unique look to the menus, exclusive stages, and it's own story. So I really think they're overdue to put it on Steam. But oh well, that didn't stop me, I finally sat down and gave it a shot! I of course played through the Arcade as Sol and had a pretty good time with it!

It's GG so of course you already know the music and graphics are AMAZING, it feels great to play and is overall a fantastic package. I actually thought the menu aesthetics this time around were CRAZY good. Everything looks really cool and good and I know the character select is a bit notorious for being kinda difficult to see everything. And yeah that's true but I thought it looked awesome! Overall this game rules and I think it's worth checking out even with XX being a thing. It's interesting to see just how far the quality in sprites and backgrounds improved from Missing Link to X in not even that long of a time (though ML will still be one of my all time favs aha)

My only major complaint is that I thought the Arcade Mode was relentlessly brutal this time around. Once I reached the second half I was massively struggling to get through and I could not beat Dizzy to save my life, it was nuts. I never had this trouble with Missing Link or XX! Maybe it was just the version I was playing or my controller. But this game seriously whipped my ass. Oh well. Still cool.

User Unknwn (July 17, 2023) - PC

It's okay for me to write about games made by friends of mine right? That's cool? It's my tumblr I'll shout out whoever I want. A friend of mine recently released a visual novel and I think you should give it a read! User Unknwn is an interesting and in my opinion, unsettling little visual novel about a strange homebrew app for PSP that causes... Problems let's say.

It talks about dysphoria and struggling with presenting and how people treat you when you're trans. I think it's best you read it yourself to see how you interpret it, but I found it to be very relatable with how it handles these topics and also makes it very creepy and bizarre in a good way. It's got nice visuals, I liked the use of real world photos and scribbles, it's a nice combination. It's got an interesting story and it's actually got an original soundtrack! Which is very good but also cool that they made the effort to include that! Most small indie games will just forgo music altogether or use free music, I'll admit I'm guilty of most of my games being silent. But no, here you get a full soundtrack! Which is honestly awesome! My favorite might be, and I'm sorry I have to type this... "Music That Will Make You Cum Your Pants"

Seeing as how it's a visual novel there's really nothing to complain about. My only complaint is that I'm also an original trilogy Paper Mario guy and I would NOT act like gabe, I'm better than that.

Super Mario 64 Star Road (December 24, 2011) - N64 Mod

Hey! Would you believe that this is probably the first Mario Romhack I've ever beaten? I've played TONS of Mario Fangames in my time. But never any Rockhacks oddly enough. But I recently played Super Mario 64 CO-OP with some friends, and I LOVED IT. You can set it to not boot you out when getting a star, let Mario access moves added to later games, and improve his swimming which makes the game feel SO good and new. It also natively runs fullscreen and has modern controller controls, it feels SO good to play this way (and you can customize Mario's color scheme.) So I did a quick 30 star run in the base game, and wanted more. It came with Star Road so I decided to play through that, and here we are!

STAR ROAD RULES!! It's a brand new game with a fully original hub world, all new stages, 120 brand new stars. Nothing is copied from Mario 64 except for the characters and the base engine and what not, of course. It's literally a whole new experience, and I loved it! I loved the new worlds, my favorites were probably Bob-Omb Island and Fatal Flame Falls! There's tons of areas to see and I don't think I even found them all! The game also has original boss battles like a bunch of big piranha plants which was very cool to see! And I was blown away by just how big the game is. I rushed the to beat the first boss, and then was shocked to see a second hub world! Then the same thing happened and there's a third hub world! This game is crazy massive! It's also got some new enemies, some visuals and stuff from other Mario games, and it was super cute hearing different video game tracks put in the SM64 soundfont for the OST!

The game isn't perfect though. In my opinion it's too long. You need 80 stars to beat it which is already 10 more than the original. And I feel like there's less stars in each world than the original game so you REALLY have to 100% a lot of worlds in order to get everything you need. I 100% cleared almost every main level to get 80 stars which is just a bit too much. I also felt like there were too many instadeath locations. The big bully in the snow world, the piranha plant boss, ect ect. Gloomy Garden was especially guilty for having SO many places to fall off and feeling SO big while also being so empty. That was easily my least favorite stage. BUT aside from that, this was an amazing romhack! I may even come back and 100% it some day!

Pac-Man World 2 (February 24, 2002) - Gamecube

And last but not least, Pac-Man World 2! I played the first one last year I believe, so of course it's only natural we jump into the sequel this year! This one I basically knew nothing about, never watched any videos of it or nothing. I just remember seeing the cover a lot at my local video rental store... I'm not old shut up. (I miss you so much, Screenplay Video...) But I finally gave it a go and I'm glad I did! It's a neat little game!

The game looks very nice, controls nice, I thought the music was good. And I love the story honestly. Spooky is cool and the whole concept with collecting the gold fruit, while simple, is cute and works perfectly. The game also isn't too long, it's shorter than even the first one. Speaking of which, I was really shocked to see how similar it was to the first one. The Rev Roll is still there and it has a lot of the same mechanics with finding fruit and what not. Idk why I just wasn't expect it to be so similar to the first! I do think I might prefer this one though? And the final boss was cool and the first boss was FANTASTIC!!

Speaking of bosses though, this ties in perfectly with what WASN'T that good about it. Dude. The middle 3 bosses are the EXACT same bosses and this boss fight fucking SUCKS. IT'S AWFUL, so I have no idea why they recycled it 3 TIMES but the cool frog boss just got left in the dust. It's so stupid. In addition whole the game itself is short that's only the case cause there's so few levels. Which they had to do cause the levels are SO LONG!! They drag on FOREVER and especially some of the on rails ones can just go and go and go. It's not too hard so it's not that bad but it can noticeable when you're playing a single level for what feels like forever. I also felt like there were a lot of jumps that were just slightly too far to make, I kept ALWAYS grabbing the ledge and rarely landing on platforms, and if you do that on the tons of platforms that fall, it's an instadeath every time. And then the final level felt completely broken. I had no idea what was happening in that stage I would constantly make progress, and then my reward would be being sent back earlier into the level. Wormwood fucking rules though so that's okay.

Regardless! Now that that's over there's only one more game left! Pac-Man World 3! THAT'S the one I've been looking forward to! It's the only one I played as a kid, it's edgy, and Pacman PUNCHES PEOPLE! I can't wait to play it!

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I also played 2 other games, but really didn't have much of anything to say on them. WarioWare, Inc. Mega Party Game$! which was, neat but really boring without friends. Cutscenes were particularly goofy though. And Capcom vs. SNK 2: Mark of the Millennium 2001 which was a very cool fighting game I've heard people rave about for ages! But I only briefly played it so I'd like to learn how to play it better and give it another go later, particularly after I play more KoF. But hey, look at my funny custom Morrigan color scheme: