#chitten

[jellybeanfeind]

Magic in Astrozoda behaves less like an innate force of nature and more like a coding language that hasn’t been updated since it was originally written. This means that spellcrafting is an extremely powerful but extremely dangerous line of study; amazing discoveries have been made entirely on accident, but so have a lot of…less fortunate occurrences. But for every For loop that ends in catastrophic disaster, there are a dozen misspelt attributes or misread commands that lead to Astrozoda’s cultures, landscapes, and wildlife being peppered with the screw-ups of spellcrafters past. And chickens, being plentiful, are often tragic test subjects.

The cockatrice is among the most populous and ancient of these screw-ups. Whoever first made one did so well over five hundred years ago, so their exact intentions are unknown, but very few modern scholars entertain the idea that the cockatrice was what they were actually trying to make. Cockatrices can occur if a snake nests eggs in magically-enhanced henhouses, but with improvements to homesteading magic, this has become rare. Nonetheless, breeding populations of cockatrices are well-established in warm-temperate regions where poultry farms and wild snakes co-occur. In some of these regions, they have out-competed other mid-sized carnivores to the point that some areas have experienced local extinctions of foxes or bobcats.

The chunk and the long chicken are more modern in origin. Both are the work of (in)famous spellcrafter Atticus Owle, whose various discoveries (and screw-ups) over his career ended in his sudden disappearance about thirty years ago. Both of these animals were crafted with the original intention of increasing the meat output of domestic poultry without selective breeding to the point of debilitating deformity; he’d hoped that the long chicken in particular would replace the popular broiler chicken breed, and that the chunk would reduce hunting stress on ducks. Unfortunately, long chickens are far too dangerous to farm, and chunks are much better at hiding than ducks, in addition to not being any bigger.

The chunk lives in rivers and shallow lakes, where it hides close to the bottom to ambush prey that ventures too close. When no fish are nearby, chunks will swim slowly in the direction of the water’s flow, allowing their markings to help disguise their movement. Chunks beach only to nest, but they will rarely do so in the territories of humanoids; they are apparently quite intelligent, and only a few safe locations are known to hide their nests. Fishers in regions with established populations of chunks will often leave fishmeal bait a few hundred paces away from their fishing spots, to keep the birds well-sated so as to leave the largest fish for the fishers.

Long chickens are quite the mystery all of their own. The spell creating them was apparently supposed to simply create “large” chickens, but clearly, something went wrong. Owle reportedly hypothesized that chickens are descended of much larger animals, but in trying to unearth the supposed ancestor, made something far more difficult to farm. Long chickens are cooperative hunters, living in disorganized packs of around thirty individuals, and they primarily use their immense speed and high numbers to simply overwhelm prey animals. Though they are only about two feet tall at the shoulder, flocks of long chickens have reportedly been sighted felling moose.

Chittens and nuggets are the result of more elementary-level spellcrafting errors, but simplicity in the mistake does not equate simplicity in the consequences. Chittens were intended to be a sort of “designer” pet, to retain kitten-like cuteness its whole life and to come in a variety of colors. While they do certainly live up to this purpose, and indeed are very popular pets, feral populations are also now established, and these feral colonies have led to the discovery of some previously-unknown effects of their origins.

To dissuade potential animal abuse, a condition was written in their creation spell which could inflict immense dread upon someone knowingly harming a chitten. This had additional conditions attached to it, such that the condition would not affect anyone acting in self-defense, or in the chitten’s best interests, or for the safety of others, but these components were written in less-stable terms, and some feral populations of chittens have become nearly impossible to remove as a result. Even local predators cannot face them; wolves living near feral chitten colonies not only avoid chittens, but they secondarily will avoid anything that looks or smells like one. This has led to some interesting changes in these areas, where cuteness has converged on an aposematic condition, and other prey animals will mimic the round head and colorful eyes of a chitten to avoid being eaten.

Nuggets, on the other hand, are harmlessly filling an ecological niche they found completely on accident. Like every other animal featured here, nuggets were created on accident by a spellcrafter’s poor proofreading, however they have no exceptional features that endow them with the ability to out-compete much of anything. They’re basically hamsters. Conveniently enough, their invention coincided with a terrible plague which had devastated a small region’s populations of mice and squirrels. Releasing nuggets into the area prevented the drop in rodent population from negatively impacting higher trophic levels, and now they are a staple worldwide, as common as mice.

More “important” information on Astrozoda to come, I was just possessed by the need to make sure these chickens were seen.

[talesofnecromancy]

Witch's cat wants to speak with spirits too...

[wraithwitch]

Things to remember when oil painting…

- If a background is light in colour, paint that area before you plot any of your actual shapes and forms on it. Otherwise if you sketch on a blank canvas, you will have to paint in your background around your sketched objects - which is insanity.

- Block as much of your canvas in its basic colours as you can. It will look like a child’s colouring book, but it will allow you to judge tone, light and shade and the nuances of the painting more easily as you work.

- Oil paints have three stages: wet, malleably dry, and dry. When you paint on wet paint, the colours literally squish together, the canvas becomes you palette. When you work on semi-dry paint the colours still blend but more subtly, or they require more white spirit or brush pressure to do so. When oil paint is dry it is possible to paint a new colour on top of the existing scene without interacting with the base colours already painted.

- Do not ‘pet’ the painting. Don’t stroke it pointlessly with your brush when all you’re adding is paint, not detail or finesse.

- DON’T lick your brushes or use them to pin up your hair.

- DON’T stick your brush in your tea/coffee/water/vodka.

- DON’T wipe your hands down your clothes – in fact, don’t touch anything at all if you can help it.

- DON’T paint whilst drunk. The painting will be gloriously uninhibeted and likely better than your usual work. But, your abode and clothes, cutlery and kitchen will be covered in oilpaint. Good luck cleaning that off.

- Last of all – OMG GET THE FUCK OFF OF THERE YOU LITTLE GREMLIN IF YOU’VE STEPPED IN MY OIL PAINT I’ll - AAARGHHHH! DON’T EVEN THINK OF DRINKING THE PAINT-THINNER, I SWEAR TO BAST…  

[b-2-b-1]

Ok so I may or may not be ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED with the Silt verses I’m literally begging give them a listen. Anyway I have been possessed by the urge to draw sister Carpenter because yes. She’s just. Very character. I would sell my souls for her

[asoryu]

little thang

[risenwraith]

#105 Dear gods.

It’s just as well the pathetic stage of this only lasts a few days otherwise I’d be bloody unbearable.

I don’t want to sit or stand or lie because no position is comfortable for long. I want to eat but I don’t know what; on the other hand, if I don’t eat I’ll be four seconds away from collapsing on the floor and sobbing like a toddler. I’m desperately tired, but sleep only appears in dribs and drabs. I don’t have the energy to do anything, yet at the same time I am so horribly bored.

The cats have recognised that All Is Not Well with me - probably via the sad little noises I constantly make because gravity hates me. To remedy this, they are sitting on me with a vengeance no matter how many times I complain and move because of zapping bones.

The cats refuse to touch one another when they sit with me, which makes the situation even more absurd. I end up with one cat across my ankles and one across my chest which renders sitting up a Herculean task I don’t have the wherewithal for. I'm in chitten jail.

(Both felines blink, make themselves even heavier with sleep, and congratulate themselves on a job well done.)

[charscounterattack]

[bikepackinguk]

Day Eighty-eight

My alarm was snoozed until 8am this morning after the long day yesterday, and I enjoyed a nice lazy start to getting aet for the day ahead. It's what Sundays are for!

Gotta get moving eventually though! Out from the trees and onto the road at Severn Beach, it's time to get going south.

Rolling through the pretty little town, it's on to the big Severn Road past the industrial estates around Chittening. With it being the weekend, the roads aren't too heavy with traffic, and there's some nice cycle paths alongside to allow me to leisurely roll along, including a lovely ride through some leafy green areas.

I keep on following the paths round the big roads to reach Avonmouth, and after navigating around the big motorway interchange I head up and over the bridge to cross the River Avon as it exits into the channel.

I've ridden parts of this stretch in years past, including heading over the tall bridge, so it's some pleasant nostalgia seeing the views from up on high here.

Down the other side of the river, it's on to the cycle route as it threads its way around the outskirts of more industrial estates, but the path is well sheltered by hedges and forests and makes for a nice ride despite the series of 90 degree turns.

After heading through some more nice parkland away from traffic, the trail heads into Portishead, where I have a quick break to restock on water before passing the marina and slogging up the hills around the shoreline.

What begins as some rolling climbs around the coast turn into a long heavy ascent as I head further round, before getting onto some quieter roads to roll down past fields and golf courses into Clevedon.

Whilst not as lousy with climbs as Portishead, Clevedon's green and lush surroundings still require a good bit of effort as I head up around the north of town to eventually zoom down along the shoreline to stop off at the beach.

Whilst the rain has held off so far today, the wind coming up the Bristol Channel is fairly stiff, and the water around the pier is being put to good use by the local sailing club, with the benches along the seafront filled with onlookers. I join them for awhile to enjoy a great view of the Welsh coast back across the water.

From Clevedon, there's no immediate through road around the coast proper except the motorway, which is of course inaccessible by bicycle. Fortunately, I'd been pondering a slight detour here which now turns out to be a valid course round.

So, out from Clevedon I head on through the nice level fields and down to Yatton, where I jump onto the great Strawberry Line cycle trail. This is another route I have ridden a few times in the past, and it's great to be back on it once more as it carries me south along the old former rail line.

Through more fields and paddocks the trail leads on, with some good flat terrain making for easy riding. I have a brief stop to help a family with a loose saddle, and rode past the Thatchers cider or hards before arriving at the edge of the Mendip Hills in Sandford.

I have a short spell on the A368 past some nice cottages and farmhouses to roll into Banwell, before heading off the busier road to start tracking up to my next stop - Weston-super-Mare.

One advantage to the motorways crowding the region here is that they are often heavily lines with patches of trees around junctions and towns to lessen their noise pollution, and it's no exception here as the M5 goes around the east of Weston-super-Mare. And like last night's location, it makes for a great spot to camp up for the night where I shouldn't be disturbed.

It's an earlier finish for me today than usual, but I'm happy to give myself a gentler day for a change. Plus I have a few bits I want to pick up in town tomorrow, which starting nearby will make very convenient.

In the meantime, I have a nice cup of tea on the go, and can enjoy a good lie down for the evening.

TTFN!

[sp-bf]

chittens... putting them in soup

[katjadarkrider]

Grand Larceny/Arson/Arson & unnamed chitten/Larceny & Arson (Arsony)

Drawings from December 2022

[unimother]

Elon Musk's Tech Breakthrough: What is He Doing on Mars?

In this video, we're going to take a look at what Elon Musk is up to, and what might be the biggest tech breakthrough of our time!

Elon Musk has been busy lately, and one of the projects he's been working on is a technology that could change the way we explore Mars. We're going to take a look at this tech breakthrough and see what it is, and whether or not it has the potential to change the way we explore space!

Black soldier fly larvae is usually high in both protein and fat with protein content ranging from 30 to 53 gram per 100 gram dry matter and lipid content ranging from 20 to 41 gram per 100 gram chitten functions predominantly as dietary fiber in the human body and consists of two two 100 gram dry matter of black soldier fly larvae the Olympic composition of black soldier fly larvae is similar to that of palm kernel oil which contains lauric acid which has a more favorable effect on total HDL than any other generated for

[xeyoaa]

boys in a bar

[talesofnecromancy]

Salem’s Revenge...

Being lovingly pressed to death by a large black witch’s cat.

[wraithwitch]

Fuck you, fuck this, fuck that most of all, don’t even fucking tryTHAT thank you very fucking much - in short fuck everything today other than cats and tea.

[gmrsysteme]

[risenwraith]

#127 Hope Scarves.

There is a little sign by the reception desk of the oncology unit at the hospital about 'Hope Scarves'; it says that if you are in active treatment you can ask for one. I'd seen it and meant to ask, but chemo brain or distractions or shyness prevented me. Finally I did.

What I thought a Hope Scarf was: a pretty charity-given scarf for someone doing chemo. 

I was not prepared for what they actually are. They are not a grab-bag of random donations. They are carefully and beautifully presented in individual organza bags displaying a folded scarf like a wedding gift. I wish I’d had more time to look before choosing. (‘That one has a bit of purple,’ said one of the nurses betting on an almost sure thing.) But maybe it’s right that I didn’t have time to deliberate: I picked one on instinct that was a lush blood-red alizarin colour with no immediately decreeable pattern.

When I got home and unwrapped everything... there is so much more than just a scarf.

The idea is that a scarf is donated and along with it a story - a story of someone's hope and journey. You keep the scarf for as long as you feel is right for you, and then you send it back to the charity along with your story and encouragement. The scarf is dry-cleaned and parcelled back up for the next person to pick. It's like a chain-letter or email, only instead of mild annoyance, a scarf and a story and encouragement are passed on to the next recipient.

It's a truly brilliant and lovely idea.

The only downside is I’m a witch who survives through chittens, coffee, art, spite, and the kindness of far away friends. Aaaand I don’t think most people would find that inspiring or comforting really. I shall have to think very carefully about the right story to tell.