#codewarnings

[swayaminfotech]

When you forgot to call the function.

[super-unpredictable98]

Hard Candy (~Misfits AU~)

Chapter 2: The Secret Banksy Code

Warning: Strong language, sexual content, blood and gore (a little), death, mention of alcohol and drug use.

(Hand Candy Masterlist)

The next day I was up way before my alarm went off, so I kept trying to figure out my powers to kill time, still no luck... 

When I arrived at the community center, I spotted Nathan coming out, which was weird since it was still closed. He froze when he saw me watching as he jumped out of a window.

- Hey there - I smiled - wanna tell me what this is about?

- Would you believe me if I told you it was a burglary?

- No, not really...

- Well, I got drunk yesterday and didn't wanna go home and be lectured by my mum - he stretched, his shirt riding up, showing me his waist. I hate to admit how much that startled me.

- That is more believable.

Nathan gave me a grin, placing a cigarette between his lips, of course he used to be a smoker... We walked towards the others, everyone else was already waiting for Tony to arrive and analyzing the weird graffiti on the wall: "I'm going to kill you" in bold red letters.

- This is a joke, did one of you do this? - Curtis asked.

- Don't look at me, cuz I didn't do it - Kelly said.

- I'll tell you who did it - Nathan lit up his cigarette - it's that Banksy prick, there's a hidden meaning.

- And why would Banksy bring his pretentious arse to this Godforsaken town? - I chuckled.

- You don't know Banksy, you don't know what he's capable of - Nathan narrowed his eyes with a conspiratory tone - or maybe you do...

- Maybe someone wants to kill us - Simon looked a bit scared.

- Why would anybody want to kill us? - Kelly asked.

- Right, come on you lot, let's get changed - Tony arrived, looking much better than the day before.

- Have you seen this? - Curtis pointed at the wall - Someone's taking the piss...

- Yeah, it's terrible, isn't it? This anti-social behavior - Tony shook his head.

- Oh, is he havin’ a dig at us? - Nathan took a long drag.

Alisha's phone started ringing and Tony flipped the fuck out, I wasn't sure if that was due to the storm or just his general assholness. He took all of our phones for the day like we were a bunch of little children in school. 

I'm pretty sure he wasn't allowed to do this, but I wasn't gonna argue with him, especially not after the storm, knowing what was about to come. I just prayed none of my students decided to call or text me about something important.

In the locker room, I stuffed my backpack in my locker and shed my clothes to slip into my uniform. I nearly jumped when I felt a tap on my shoulder, behind me Nathan only had half of his jumpsuit on, the top of it hanging behind him.

- I was only jokin’ yesterday about your nipples gettin’ hard when I'm around, but look at that... - He stared at my chest right before I finished zipping up.

- Someone thinks highly of themselves... - I teased.

- Look, it's not my fault your body reacts to me like that.

- Those are my piercings, you twat - I laughed, throwing my head back.

- Piercings... - Nathan's face shifted with glee - I'm not being funny, but I don't believe you, mind if I take a look?

- Ha - I slammed my locker shut, turning around - you'll need to work harder than this.

- You little tease... - He leaned over me - Alright, I'm willin’ to work for it. 

Is he serious or Is he just winding me up? With Nathan you never know, that charmer... I grabbed a bucket and followed the others outside to take care of that graffiti. 

- You know, after the storm did any of yous feel like dead weird? - Kelly stopped  scrubbing and looked at me.

- Yeah, I had a strange tinglin’ sensation in my anus - Nathan said.

- Was there a cock inside of it? - I snickered.

Nathan simply stuck his tongue out at me and went back to scrubbing.

- What? Did you feel weird? - Kelly turned to Simon.

- You don't wanna hear about my anus? - Nathan sounded almost offended.

- Do you really need to ask the question? - Curtis huffed. 

- Something happened - Simon finally mumbled.

- What's that? Squeak up... - Nathan encouraged.

- Something happened to me - Simon continued.

- Are you a virgin? High fi...

- Shut up! - Kelly shouted and he retreated - What was it?

- It's nothing - Simon looked like a deer in the headlights.

I felt bad for Kel, she was probably struggling with her new power, it must be  horrible to be forced to hear that shit all day... I was brought back to reality when Kelly shoved Nathan out of the blue. 

He stumbled over the bucket behind him, splashing water everywhere, and nearly fell on his ass, but luckily I held him in time. 

- What was that for? - He whined.

- What were you thinking about? - I asked, knowing there was probably something stupid going through his brain.

- What does that mean?

- Nothing - I shook my head - are you ok?

- No, I feel weak! - He threw himself even more in my arms - There's only one thing that can make me feel better right now... 

- And what's that? - I giggled.

- Seein’ a pair of pierced nipples, d’you know any girls who might have them? 

- Oh, piss off... - I pushed him slightly.

After we were done cleaning, none of us was able to find Tony (or Kelly, who stormed off right after pushing Nathan) to ask what we were supposed to do next, so we just went inside and wandered around for a bit.

I nearly lost it when I found a room filled with musical instruments. Given they were pretty beaten up, there was some seriously cool stuff in there. I went straight for the beautiful guitar hanging on the wall, it was completely out of tune, but I could fix that in a second.

When I came out to find the others and show them, I was surprised by a very interesting conversation the boys were having next to the table football:

- Whatever, couple o’Bacardi Breezers, man, I reckon she'll be good to go - Nathan said - sounds like the girl for you, weird kid.

- So you get Lydia then - Curtis laughed.

- Exactly, I’ve been wantin’ to find out how many licks does it take t’get to the center of that Lollipop... - Nathan waggled his brows with a grunt.

- Alright, do the girls have a say in this? 

- A group of young people doin’ mindless shit all day... Face it, man, it's gonna happen, it always does! It's biology or physics, one o’those. So do we have a deal, gentlemen?

- I can't believe my ears - I shook my head with a smirk.

All three boys turned around, Simon and Curtis seemed mortified, Nathan just smiled and bit his lip. 

- I-I-I wasn't gonna take the deal - Curtis stuttered.

- Me neither - Simon agreed.

- You're not even gonna pretend to be embarrassed? - I looked at Nathan.

- Why would I be? - He shrugged - Just tryin’ to make a nice arrangement for  everyone. Are you not happy with the pairing?

- Smug bastard... 

- That wasn't a no - His grin widened.

- Well, what I came here to ask in the first place is if any of you play any instruments, I just found this room full of them over there.

- I play the spoons - Nathan raised his hand.

- The spoons? - Curtis looked at him confused - Like the ones we eat with?

- Yes, I've learned it in school - he said.

- How the fuck do you play a spoon? 

- Find me a couple and I'll show you.

- I was expecting something more on the realm of piano, drums, bass... - I said - But I guess it works.

I sat down on a couch where Alisha was and slowly started tuning the guitar. Nathan was beating the vending machine like it owed him money, trying to get a Coke. Once he succeeded, he sat down on a wheelchair that was laying around. Curtis and Simon were bringing back the buckets and cleaning supplies. 

Alisha and Nathan took it upon themselves to give Curtis grief for being caught with the drugs, I don't know why they decided to pick on him out of all the people, but Curtis wasn't happy about it. Lisha then decided to tell the story of the night she was arrested.

I didn't hear much of it, since I was too focused on the guitar and getting it to sound perfect. I nearly popped one of the strings when Kelly came through the door, falling on her face.

- He's gonna kill us! - Kelly screamed.

- Nice entrance, very dramatic! - Nathan clapped.

- The probation worker’s gone mental, he just attacked me! Something really weird is happenin’! I'm hearin’ these voices, it's like I can hear what people are thinkin’. 

- Have you been sniffing glue? - Alisha mocked.

- The storm, the lightning! I don't know, it's done somethin’ to us! - Kelly was  very nervous.

- Ok, if you can hear our thoughts, what am I thinkin’ now? - Nathan squinted with disbelief.

- You think it's bullshit - Kelly said.

- Of course I think it's bullshit, you don't need to be a mind reader to know that!

- Why are you in a wheelchair?

- It was the storm - Nathan cried - the weird tinglin’ sensation in my anus has spread through my body and now I can't feel my legs.

- I'm serious! - Kelly kicked him in the shin.

- Guys, I think she's telling the truth - I put the guitar to the side and got up.

- What do you even mean the probation worker attacked you? - Curtis asked.

- He's out there and chased me! - Kelly shouted.

- Something happened to me too - Simon admitted. 

- Did you pop your cherry? - Nathan took another sip of his drink - Ah, we're all very happy for you! 

- Earlier on when we were in the locker room - Simon ignored Nathan, which is always a good strategy if you ask me - I turned invisible.

- So, she's psychic and you can turn invisible? - Curtis snickered - That seems likely...

- Did anyone witness this miraculous disappearance? - Nathan asked sarcastically.

- You were all there - Simon said.

- I think we would've noticed you vanishing into thin air - Alisha rolled her eyes.

- You didn't - Simon looked around - I was standing right there, you couldn't see me.

- Alright - Nathan wheeled closer to Simon - go on then, do it... Turn invisible.

Simon concentrated for a few seconds, trying to make it happen, I tried very hard to keep a straight face, poor Si...

- Oh my God! He's disappeared! - Nathan gasped.

- Can't you see me? - Simon believed it...

- No - Nathan threw his empty can at him - you're invisible! You two are hilarious, keep takin’ that medication.

- Guys, I think we should listen - I urged them - really, this seems serious.

- I can't believe you're buyin’ this load o’crap - Nathan turned to me as he wheeled towards the door - you seemed smarter than this, Lyds.

- I feel it, Nathan, I know something’s wrong!

- Don't go out there, he will kill ya! - Kelly held him by the shoulders.

- Of course he will, cause he's such a bad...

- Don't! - Kelly screamed.

- She's telling the truth - Curtis suddenly interrupted.

- And you know this how? - Nathan asked - I suppose you're a psychic too?

- All this... - Curtis was panting - It's already happened once. I opened the door,  the probation worker killed you. You were right there, you were dead and everything froze, then time went backwards.

- You're saying you turned back time? - Alisha sighed.

- This just gets better by the second - Nathan got up.

- Everything happened again, exactly the same! - Curtis warned - I'm telling you, don't open that door.

Nathan didn't listen, he opened the door only to close it again a second later and lock it, his face was taken by fear. 

- He's right - he gasped - the probation worker's gone mental.

We started hearing banging on the door and Nathan screamed, running away from it. The silhouette of that monster on the glass made my stomach drop. We all stood together in the middle of the room, too scared to stand alone.

- Maybe he's on crystal meth, that stuff makes you crazy - Alisha said - my friend did it once and she almost shagged her brother and he's really ugly...

- Oh, so that's the issue with that situation... - I scoffed - He's clearly possessed by something.

- The graffiti - Simon looked at me - he wrote it!

- I said there was a hidden meaning - Nathan moaned - or not...

- Did something happen to the two of you? - Kelly turned to me and Alisha.

- Not yet - I said.

- No - Alisha shook her head - we should call the police.

- He has our phones - Simon said.

- He stopped - Curtis pointed out, it was the calm before the storm (no pun intended).

- Why the fuck did you come here? You should've gone for help - Alisha yelled.

- What do you know, bitch? - Kelly yelled back.

- Shut up, you chav...

- If you call me a chav one more time, I'll kick you so hard in the cunt your mum will feel it!

- Her mum will feel it? How does that work? - Nathan asked.

- Shit, don't make me laugh now! - I pushed his shoulder, covering my mouth.

- He tried t’kill me - Kelly turned to us - I came here to warn yous lot, I could've left ya. I'm sick of you all judgin’ me, you can fuck off!

- Kelly - I tilted my head - come on, it's not like that.

- Whatever, I'm getting out of here - Alisha headed the other way.

- Yeah, out the back, c’mon! - Nathan held my hand, pulling me with him. 

What happened next all fit in one second: Nathan slipped on something wet on the floor and was about to fall and pull me with him. I closed my eyes waiting for the shock, but there was none.

- Shit! - Nathan's voice made me open my eyes.

We were both floating slightly above the floor, inside of a thin blue-ish glowing bubble. My mouth fell open with excitement.

- Am I doing this? - I asked.

- I think so - Nathan gaped.

- You can make force fields... - Simon was amazed.

I took a deep breath and suddenly the bubble was gone and we landed softly on  the blood-covered floor.

- Is this blood? - I looked at our red-covered hands.

- Oh Fuck! - Nathan got up - Jesus Christ! Get it off of me!

He started frenetically wiping his hands on his overalls while gagging, I simply wrinkled my nose from the smell of iron.

- It's from the locker - I pointed.

We all stared at it for a while until Curtis walked up to open the door. By the looks of it, I knew who was inside...

- Oh shit, it's the other kid - I winced.

- I did wonder what happened to him - Nathan hid behind me, very heroic I might add.

- He's gonna kill us - Alisha cried.

- Turn back time, stop this happenin’ - Nathan suggested as if that was the greatest idea ever.

- I don't know how it works! - Curtis replied.

- Oh great! Very useful! 

- Stop it, Nathan! - I scolded - You're just making it worse.

- Don't look at him - Curtis said right before trying to hold Alisha's hand and losing it completely - I gotta have sex with you right now! You're so beautiful...

- Shit! - I pulled Curtis away - Let go of her! 

- What? - He looked at me and then at Alisha - What did I do?

- When you touch her, you go crazy and start saying creepy shit - I explained,  hoping it would stop that from happening again - I think she can make people wanna shag her.

- You were gettin’ your chap out - Nathan chuckled.

- Shut up... - Curtis turned around.

Alisha looked down at her own hands and slowly reached to touch me and Simon at the same time. When I felt her warm skin around my neck it was like a blast of electricity going through my body, I couldn't see or hear anything, it was like I had no control over my actions.

- What is happening to me? 

I heard Alisha scream when she let go and I started to recover my senses. 

- You sick bastard... - Nathan looked at Simon and then at me - And you! You're way freakier than I thought.

- What did I say? - I was turning red from embarrassment.

- I don't even think I have the nerve to repeat it - Nathan smiled in admiration.

Next thing I know something bursts through the door, it was Tony, he had a big metal pipe and a terrifying look on his face. Kelly grabbed a can of paint and used it to hit him in the head.

- Thanks - Nathan smiled at me and I noticed there was another glowing bubble  surrounding the both of us and Simon, who was standing next to me.

- Oh - I shook my head and the bubble disappeared.  

Tony was on the floor with the back of his head open, we stared at him for a few seconds.

- What did you do? - Nathan looked at Kelly.

- Is he dead? - Alisha asked.

- I'm no doctor, but... - Nathan whimpered - Y’see the way the back of his head is caved in like that?

Seems like he wasn't dead after all, because Tony tried to grab Kelly's leg, we all screamed as we watched her smashing his head with her free foot, the noises made me almost gag.

- That should do it - Nathan was holding onto his hair. 

- You killed our probation worker - Alisha was agape.

- This is very, very bad... - Nathan's voice was breaking.

- No shit, Sherlock! - I probably sounded harsher than I intended.

- He would've killed us - Kelly tried to justify.

- We should call the police, it was self-defense - Curtis said.

- Yeah, we show them the dead boy in the locker, they do some CSI shit and figure it out - Alisha agreed.

- That's not gonna work - I shook my head - they won't believe us.

- We just tell them the truth! Stick to our story - Curtis pleaded.

- What's that story? He can turn invisible, she can make force fields and you rewind time? - Kelly yelled - Doesn't matter what we tell them, they'll say we're lying. They're gonna say we killed them both! No one's gonna believe you, not anymore!

- If there's no body, there's no crime - Simon mumbled - we should bury them under the flyover.

- How do we do that? Someone's gonna see us - Alisha asked.

- No! We put them in those wheelchairs, we wheel them up there - Nathan said enthusiastically - and if anyone sees us, we're just a bunch of young offenders takin’ a couple o’specials for a walk in the sunshine...

And that's exactly what we did, it was harder than I thought it would be, especially carrying the dead bodies to the chairs and cleaning the mess, but nobody seemed to care when they saw us, it was the perfect cover. 

Digging the hole was another pain in the ass, but I guess it was a good work out for all of us. When we were finally done, we dumped them both in the hole and started shoveling the dirt back in.

- I'm pretty sure this breaches the terms o’my ASBO - Nathan looked at the scene with one hand on his hip.

- We don't tell anyone about this, yeah? - Kelly said - About the storm, the powers, or anythin’.

- We're buryin’ out probation worker, we don't need to be drawin’ any attention to ourselves - Nathan agreed.

- I don't want anyone to know, I cannot be a freak - Alisha seemed to have her priorities sorted...

- What about you? - Kelly pointed at Curtis, who just stared at her with doubt.

- There's no goin’ back now, man - Nathan said - you're just as screwed as the rest of us, you're black and famous, you're probably more screwed!

- I shouldn't even be here... - Curtis replied angrily.

- Hey, can we talk about how you said you wanted to piss on her tits? - Nathan looked at Simon - probably best to keep that kind o’thing between you and your internet service provider.

- What did I say, Nathan? - I was scared of the answer.

- You said you wanted her to tie you up and drip hot wax all over ya - he raised his eyebrows.

- Ah, that's not bad - I felt relieved.

- Not bad? Jesus, you really are a sexual deviant! - Nathan cackled.

- Can you stop? - Kelly looked at Nathan - Stop thinkin’ of that, that's gross.

- Sorry, mate, Lydia just fueled my imagination quite a bit - he looked me up and down.

- Well, knock it off! - Kelly grunted.

- Hold on, all of you have some kind o’special power. Everyone can do somethin’ except me... Weird kid can do somethin’! He can do somethin’ and I can't! - Nathan ranted - That's ridiculous, look at him! Really, how does that make any sense? 

- Maybe you can do something, you just haven't found out what it is yet - Simon said.

- Yeah... Right - he smiled - what if I can't feel pain?

Kelly slapped him and I laughed, he did deserve that one.

- Did you feel that? - She asked. 

- Stop hittin’ me! - He hissed. 

- Trust me, I think your power will be awesome - I huffed a laugh.

Out of all of them, Nathan's was my favorite power. Reality-warping was quite fascinating, back in the future he used to create a whole starry sky for me to spot constellations, and sometimes when I was upset he would make fireworks with his fingertips. Marnie once mentioned he had another power as well, but I think it was a load of bollocks, cause I've never seen it.

That night I wasn't able to sleep, I guess I didn't take into consideration how disturbing this whole scenario was before inserting myself into it. I didn't regret it, but I wish I was more prepared. 

In the morning I dragged myself to the community center, and changed into my uniform, my eyes nearly closing, when I felt a pair of freakishly long arms wrapping around my waist.

- Hey, Lollipop - Nathan rested his chin on my shoulder - someone's tired.

- And what gave that away? - I yawned.

- I spent all night thinkin’ about what you thought you said to Alisha that made you so scared...

- And did you come to any conclusions?

- A few, but I'd rather you just show me.

- Maybe one day...

- How about right now? I bet I can shag the sleepy out o’you.

- Stop screwing around, the new probation worker is here - I chuckled.

- So you're sayin’ that's the only thing stoppin’ us from shaggin’ right now?

- Shut up...

The new probation worker, Sally, looked like a Tim Burton character, she didn't  seem threatening at all and that's what freaked me out, I think I've heard enough of their stories to know when something looked harmless, it was anything but.

- Gary and my colleague Tony have both been reported missing, the families are very worried about them - she said - have you seen anything unusual? Anything at all?

Nathan discreetly raised his hand and I looked at him worried, what the fuck was he thinking?

- A few days ago, I go into the toilets - Nathan was dead serious - Tony and Gary were in there, they're butt naked, Tony has Gary by his hair, and he's just doin’ him... Doggy style.

What followed was a very disturbing reenactment of the events, we all stared at Nathan as he carried that uncomfortably long demonstration. I have no clue how no one laughed, that was probably the funniest shit I've ever seen in my life, but again... I was also very sleep-deprived, so that might be part of it.

- So I'm guessin’ they ran away to continue their illicit homosexual affair - Nathan continued - and I ask you, in this world of intolerance and prejudice, who are we to condemn them?

Sally simply shook her head and left the room, the silence was only broken when I started cackling uncontrollably. I had no idea what the fuck was that, but it was just brilliant. Nathan had the biggest smile on his face, like a little boy opening Christmas gifts.

- Well, I think we got away with it - Nathan said.

- Do you actually believe that or are you just really dumb? - Curtis rolled his eyes.

- I actually believe that! I've been thinkin’, though... I was there too, I should have one o’these bullshit powers.

- You can have mine - Kelly said - wanna hear what people are thinkin’ about you?

- Not so much, I want somethin’ from the A-List - Nathan lit up a cigarette and took a long drag - like Lyds, her power is badass.

- So what happens now? Are we gonna be like this forever? - Curtis asked.

- What if we're meant to be like... Superheroes - Simon suggested.

- You lot, superheroes? No offense, but in what kind of fucked up world would that be allowed to happen? - Nathan mocked - Superheroes, I love this guy, you prick!

- Hey, quit being an arse - I snapped my fingers in front of him.

- What if there's loads of people like us all over town? - Kelly wondered.

- No - Nathan dismissed - that kind o’thing only happens in America. This will fade away...

Oh, Nathan... How I wish you were right.

[swayaminfotech]

That moment when your code only has warnings left.

[swayaminfotech]

Code Compilation.

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